Dinner’s on Me with Jesse Tyler Ferguson - RITA ORA — newlywed life and turning down ‘Eurovision’

Episode Date: August 13, 2024

Singer, actor, and “The Masked Singer” host Rita Ora joins the show. Over uni and endive salad, Rita tells me about turning down “Eurovision” and Andrew Llyod Webber, how making tea for musicians led to her big break, and the reality TV inspiration for her villainous Queen of Hearts in Disney + film “Descendants: The Rise of Red.” This episode was recorded at Amour in West Hollywood, CA. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This summer I took a little break that me and Justin had in our schedule to do a little two-week summer vacation We grabbed Beckett and Sully and we introduced them to some of our favorite spots Provincetown in Massachusetts and we also jumped across the pond to London while we were away. I had this thought What if we hosted our home on Airbnb? We all have times when we're away from home, whether we're visiting family or traveling for work or maybe taking that well-earned vacation. While you're away, you could be earning some extra cash. You can host your entire home

or if let's say your kid is away at college, which seems so far away since my boys are still just so young, but for you empty nesters, you could just host a spare bedroom. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.com slash host. Hey, I'm Rhett. And I'm Link.

Maybe you know us from our daily YouTube show, Good Mythical Morning. But this is a little trailer for our podcast Ear Biscuits, where two lifelong friends talk about life for a long time. And nothing is off limits. We talk about our sex lives, our mental health journeys, but we try to never take ourselves too seriously. So we invite you to not do the same, or to do the same.

We invite you to listen. Follow and listen to Ear Biscuits. Now for free on the Odyssey app and everywhere you get your podcasts. Hi, it's Jesse. Today on the show, a woman that's so talented in so many areas that the media has a hard time pinning her down. She's an amazing singer, businesswoman, actor. It's Rita Ora. Music is always going to have my heart. I love performing for people and it just brings me joy.

I've been just crying actually coming off just being like, how have I not done this more? This is Dinner is on Me, and I'm your host, Jesse Tyler Ferguson. -♪ All right, these are the things I knew about Rita Ora before meeting her for dinner. I knew that she was an incredible singer and songwriter, a wonderful host, an incredible singer and songwriter,

a wonderful host, an actress, a fashion icon, I knew that. I knew that she was married to Taika Waititi, the Oscar-winning director, but I also knew that she was an obsession of the tabloids, specifically the British tabloids, who seemed to analyze her every move and obsess over every outfit she wears. I was really excited to learn more about who Rita really was.

Ironically, that desire has been shared by multiple journalists. Not that I call myself a journalist, but so many of the articles I would look up were titled, and I'm not kidding you, Who is Rita Ora? And then a different one titled, but seriously, who is Rita Ora? In researching her, I learned that she is a refugee from Kosovo who still has strong ties to the nation she fled from when she was young. She had the guts to turn down a chance to be on

Eurovision years before she started recording her own music. I discovered she has an incredibly wicked sense of humor, a deep love of musical theater, and some very impressive acting chops. Look, it's naturally intimidating to meet someone whom you only know through various magazine articles, paparazzi photos, and pop singles, but let me tell you, the moment Rita entered the room, I felt completely at ease. As if I was reuniting with a good friend who just happens to go to dinner in crimson couture pantsuits with plunging necklines.

Okay, to say I was gagged over her outfit would be an understatement. Hi! Oh my gosh, you look like you belong in this room. Lady Lourdes! This is so good! Thanks for having me! I'm so happy to meet you! I brought Rita Ora to Amour, a hot new addition to West Hollywood's food scene. It opened in 2023 in a space Angelina's might remember

as Dominic's, which was one of the first restaurants I ever came to when I first moved to LA. So this space always holds a very special place in my heart. Amour transports you to Padi. Okay, first of all, everyone around us was speaking French, but also the space is so glamorous and enriched with green velvet chairs and a cozy fireplace, detailed moldings in the ceiling

and chandeliers and hardwood floors. Chef Hendrix Vega from F Fuementera Island, Spain, brings excellence from Michelin-starred restaurants in New York, Milan, Tokyo, and more recently, Gucci Osteria in Beverly Hills. The menu features cuisine with Asian influences, creating one of the most unique meals I've ever had, truly. On your way out, be sure to explore their secret library

filled with books handpicked from European trips from Paris and Saint-Tropez. Now, given Rita is truly a global sensation and so open about the intimate parts of her life, I thought she'd be the perfect person to nestle into a booth and have a nice intimate candlelit dinner with me. Okay, let's get to the conversation. Have you been here before? No, it's my first time. So cute. I'm loving the whole,

thanks for having the whole place booked out. I know, right? Yeah, we did this just for you. We closed down the restaurant for an entire week for a security sweep. So you did this to everyone? Mm-hmm, yeah. Really? Security sweep.

Yeah, you're a big deal. So we wanted to treat you right. You're lying on me, you little liar. No, I'm happy, thanks for having me. Where are you heading to after this? I'm going back to London just to see my family. I was just in London last week. I saw Abba Boyage.

Oh really? I actually wanted to see that, no. No, it's worth it. Stunning, I love plays in the UK. Isn't it great? Are you a theater goer? I actually went to musical theater, believe it or not. I didn't know that.

I know, darling. I think also now more than ever, it's like, it's one of the only few art forms that like you can feel the talent is super genuine. Because I think nowadays, you just can't. And I think with theater and things, it's becoming like, oh wow, more wow than what we've been used to,

because like everything now could be so fabricated and I don't think you can do that with theater. Yeah, with theater it's so different. I'm so sorry. Hi. We love a chat. I love a chat. I love a chat.

That's why you're here. That's why I'm here. Thanks. My glasses. Do you want a share of some sparkling or flat water? I want sparkling. I don't know what Rita would. I'll have a flat and also a cheeky lychee martini, actually.

Ooh! If I do say so myself. I'm gonna do the lychee rose and elderflower to go with your lychee martini. That sounds good too. Well, because I'll just drink on the flight and then pass. And I'll wait for her food.

And then pass out, yeah. When I come back we can talk about. Perfect, awesome, thank you. But just last on that theater thing, because it's like I feel a bit like the world has forgotten how to appreciate talent until it's like in your face. So I think when you go to a play or a theater again,

you're like, holy shit, okay, wow, this is what it's like. Yeah, do you think that theater's something you'd want to conquer someday? Yeah, I mean. Because you've done everything else, truly, and so well, I might add. Thank you. I think it's definitely, if it's the right thing,

but it's a big commitment, you know? There was a slight conversation about potentially doing something in Cabaret and I really- Oh, the Eddie Redmayne that he did in the- Yes, and I saw Eddie's in New York, and I loved it. But the commitment was, whoa, and I just thought, wow, that's like being an athlete, you know? It's really hard on you.

And when I went to see Tom, Tom Holland, he did such a great job, but he was actually sick. And I was like, are you okay? And he was like, yeah, I mean, I would never have known. And he had like a full chest infection, and I was going, are you okay? And he was like, yeah, I mean, I would never have known. And he had like a full chest infection and I was going, wow. He's amazing how he just continued and it was a big show anyway.

But yeah, it'll be something I'd love to maybe challenge. I love a good challenge, you know? I just think evolving is all I wanna do and I come from such an immigrant background where I kind of don't know how to not work. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing. My husband and my family are a bit like, you do so much. And so I'm a bit like, yeah,

but I don't really know how else to do it. Yeah, I mean, if that's your comfort zone and that's the speed you feel like you are most successful at, I don't know why there would be a need to pump the brakes, but you have, I mean, let me ask you about that though. You were born in Kosovo and you, age one, came to the UK. At what age did you realize that though. You were born in Kosovo and you, at age one, came to the UK.

At what age did you realize that you were a refugee family? Did that mean something to you? Yeah, that's a great question. But growing up, I never thought I was different. There was a lot of other immigrants in my class. Yeah, I never really struggled with the whole I don't fit in stereotype that I feel like refugees usually deal with, but as I got older

and I started to understand the stereotype and how people would look at you, it just almost made me get a bit more vocal and angry. So, you know, I definitely feel like the stigma is something I wanna continue to just encourage and move forward and get rid of almost. Did your parents ever talk about what it was like for them?

Yeah, I mean they're so fun, my parents. They try and they do such a good job in hiding all the problems growing up, but my mother couldn't speak English. My dad did a little bit when we moved and he just was working sort of three jobs and my mom was raising us and trying to do English classes on her computer, you know what I mean, and figure out her way around. And eventually she got there and then she just didn't stop and then she studied to be a psychiatrist

and then became a doctor. And yeah, I just always saw that kind of work ethic in my house. And my sister was, bless her, the older sister syndrome where you sort of have to be another parent. I feel like all older siblings have that responsibility. She's only two years older though, yeah. Yeah, so we were both kids,

but she was the first to sort of learn how to speak English properly and she would help me with my homework and she would speak for me at parents' evenings and conferences and things. And my mom almost now feels so guilty. She's like, oh, I made you do so much work and you were still a kid,

but everyone was just trying to figure it out, you know, at the time. Right. Oh, here's our cocktails. Perfect timing. Thank you. You're so cute. So this is kind of what I'm thinking.

And you tell me if that's okay. So I love our steak tartare. Okay, ooh I love steak tartare. And our blue prawn carpaccio is also very good. Then in between I was thinking I could send you some chawanmushi. What's that, sorry. It's like with truffle daki and some egg custard,

it's Japanese. So that's kind of like a Japanese influence. And maybe the konte egg foam, which is gonna be with scrambled eggs and it has like a Comté Foam on top. Oh wow. So much yummy. The blue crab, what's that you said, sorry?

The blue crab, the crab. The blue prawn carpaccio. Oh, that sounds good. I'll definitely try one of those. Yeah, let's definitely do the carpaccio. Yeah. Let's do the, I'm interested in this foam egg. I'm gonna do the crust salmon.

Crust of salmon. Can I do like a salad situation? Maybe. We can do the endive salads. Yeah, that looks good, I love that. Actually, I love our tomato salad. That's new on the menu. What do you think, the tomato or the other one?

I'm gonna do both. Really? Yes. Okay, fine. I mean, I don't wanna over, whatever, we'll eat. Okay, it's salad. For the eat. Okay, it's salad. For the love of God, it's salad. For the love of God.

Hey, cheers. Cheers. Thanks for having me. Thanks for coming. Hit me. I also did not know that you had such a rich history of theater, which I wanted to talk about. So I'm interested in this time that you came to London

and before you sort of found your voice as a musician. But what was that, what did that look like for a young reader? I was just really grateful to do anything. I was like a singing kind of jukebox growing up. I was always kind of like, who wants to hear me sing? Is there a birthday? It's like, I just found it so comforting.

I don't know, I was never sort of nervous about doing that. I just really wanted people to ask me to do it because I enjoyed kind of the reaction and making people feel good. And, you know, we always have big sort of family get togethers and there's always like lots of food on the table and, you know, aunties smoking cigarettes and everything is always like moving moving 100 miles an hour.

So that's just kind of how we are, we operate. You sit down at the table, and you just put everything in the middle, and then that means, okay, everyone can share if a packet of cigarettes or whatever it is. But I definitely wanted to make a dream a reality. I just didn't think it would happen to someone like me and my background.

Do you mean in that way that you felt stigmatized from just being a refugee? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think my parents also were kind of just so eager to kind of give us a life. That the dreams and everything felt not real. And it was more about getting a degree and just finding some sort of safety.

But I genuinely don't think I would have got a degree. You know, like I don't think I was like made for that. I find a lot of artists say that same thing. Like they either didn't finish school or they didn't have that like desire to have like that piece of paper that they could frame on the wall. It was all about, you know, how to let this thing that was inside them out.

And that was like for them, that was the equivalent of a degree. Yeah. But I also know that you had opportunity when you were pretty young, and yet you still had the foresight and the intuition to say no to certain opportunities, like the Eurovision opportunity that came.

Yeah, oh my gosh, is that a thing here? No, no, I mean, I know what it is. I feel like for us it would be like Star Search, or like what else? I mean kind of like any of the reality competition shows are but like it was a big deal. Well it's a huge thing for us in Europe. I would watch it every year and it was something

that came up like an audition or something and I think my mom was the one that saw it in a newspaper or something and I was like, yeah let's give it a shot and I went and I auditioned and I got it and then I freaked out and I was like, yeah, let's give it a shot. And I went and I auditioned and I got it. And then I freaked out and I was like... Do you remember what you sang? I sang...

You can reach me by tailboat La la la la la la I can't remember. I don't care how you get here Just... and I was... If you see online, I'm shaking. And I was 15 and I was shaking and I got it. Oh wow, thank you.

First we have the douche. Salmon tartare with a mustard dressing, ginger foam and a green oil with truffle. Thank you. Gorgeous. Thank you. Wow, amazing, thank you. I know now why you started this,

it's so you can do fancy work eating. This is exactly why. I need a food buddy. I'm your guy. But yeah, Andrew Lloyd Webber actually auditioned there, which was, again, super freaky for me because I obviously grew up to his music and went to theater school,

and so I knew everything about him, and then there I was kind of singing in front of him. That's mind-blowing. But he had my back. He did. He was like, I want Rita. By the way, this is so delicious. Isn't that great? I don't even know what I'm eating. It's. He was like, I want Rita. By the way, this is so delicious. Isn't that great? I don't even know what I'm eating.

It's caviar and tuna, is that right? There's definitely caviar. Well, she did explain it, but I just, you know, it's hard for me to register things sometimes. I know, I get too excited about food. I get so excited about food, I just want to eat. Same. Same. But that was a big, bold move I made, you know, like...

It is. Saying no at that young age, because it was going to be syndicated, you know, all over the country, all over Europe. And I just didn't think that that was my calling, you know, represent the UK. You know, I just wanted to try and do it the real way, find a record deal and try and be an artist.

Yeah. How old were you when that opportunity came to you? 16. Wow. Yeah. I mean, it is crazy that that big of an opportunity would come to you and you'd be like, not right now, but you did make the right choice.

I think so too, you know, I think it was a great time to hustle and explore and I went and worked in a recording studio and I found some free demo time because I didn't have any money to record my demos. And when I was making teas and kind of helping out in the studio and in that studio I met so many. When you say making teas, what does that mean? Making tea, like a cup of tea, like teas.

I don't even know, it was like a musical term, like I was laying down tracks. Like, I didn't know. That's good too, making tracks. Oh, I love that. No, actually making tea, like putting the kettle on. Literally making tea, okay. And it was like not what I wanted to do.

I was like, God, I'm old. This is a phrase I've never heard before. I mean, I wouldn't have understood that either, so we're in the same boat. Let's call it that though. I love that. Should I start doing that? Yeah, Mickey T's.

Okay, and I'll text you every time I do it, and the facial expression of people will be like, what the hell are you talking about? What? No, but yeah, and then there was a lot of artists that would come in and out. Jason Mraz and James Morrison and all these people that were big at the time. I'm talking early 2000s.

And they would just ask me to do backing vocals for them. And yeah, that's kind of where it's all, and record execs started flooding in. And it's all about just really presenting yourself in the right place. Cause you just never know, you know, like who you're gonna meet and where that's gonna take you. And then I eventually got on the right place because you just never know, like who you're going to meet and where that's going to take you. Then I eventually got on the right song of someone else's as a demo,

and that led me into the world of music. Then I fell in the laps of Jay Brown who found Rihanna and all these amazing artists. Then they signed me to my first record deal at Rock Nation, and I was with them for about nine years. That was Jay-Z's. That's Jay-Z's. And then they signed me to my first record deal at Rock Nation. And I was with them for about nine years. That was Jay-Z's, that's Jay-Z's. That was Jay-Z's record label. And they were also starting out at the time, Rock Nation.

And so yeah, everything was so fresh. I was like a new artist on this new label. And everything was kind of like happening so fast. Now for a quick break, but don't go away. When we come back, Rita tells us how she went from working at a recording studio to singing with Rock Nation seemingly overnight, and what it was like to be a tabloid search. But what if you could get rid of the search and just match? Well, you can with Indeed. Indeed's matching engine is constantly learning from your preferences, so the more you use Indeed, the better it gets.

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Justin and I are in London right now, so we went ahead and booked ourselves on a double-decker hop-on hop-off tour experience. We're going to go see the London Eye, we're going to go to the Thames River, they have a whole boat tour that we're going to do. Viator is a tool you can use to plan and book travel experiences all around the world. Their app and website make it easy to explore 300,000 plus travel experiences so that you can discover what's out there. Travelers also leave really helpful reviews, which I like because then I have inside intel

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Find travel experiences for you. Do more with Viator. And we're back with more Dinners on Me. Do you remember feeling at that time when you were starting off, like how did you sort of figure out what you wanted to do and like where you're, I assume a lot of that comes just from doing and figuring out what feels right? I think I was always like, okay, how am I going to make it different?

How am I going to be different? How am I gonna be different? I actually, my dad has a huge collection of music and he just introduced me to so much amazing talent. And so like Diana Ross, ABBA, Bee Gees, like, so I actually had a really good knowledge of music. You know, I wasn't just sort of like looking at what was on TV.

And so when I got into the studio, I was like, what can I do to feel different? And I would sing at my dad's pub and sing jazz music. And so I tried to incorporate that type of singing in my pop music to try and make it a bit different. And so I ended up jumping on a dance record. And I was like, well, you know what? I'm gonna just visually look epic.

And so that's when I got obsessed with fashion and I started to like look at all these incredible women, Blondie, Tina Turner, Cher, Celine, all these people that had so much presence because they were so individual. Yeah. But I always knew I was gonna be like a more than one trick pony type of gal.

Right. Like I've always wanted to do so much with film and with music because I've seen like the Tina Turner's being filmed and she has my birthday and so I was obsessed with her growing up and also my parents and my friends, especially in the LGBTQIA plus community, I would always go to the underground bars and the underground clubs and that's where I fell in love with dance music and makeup melting off my face and Just that whole vision and feeling of sweat

was kind of where I was at. When I was like 14 to 18. Thinking back now, I haven't had a conversation like this about everything for so long and just really reminding myself of all those moments and just absolutely not having a clue what is gonna happen. Well, I mean, you look at your career now

and you do so many things so well, and it's so interesting because I was looking, I was reading different articles about you and a lot of the headlines of the article was like, who is Rita Ora? Explain Rita Ora, like who is she, all this like discovering, dissecting Rita Ora. And I think, you know, when I looked at like

the scope of your career, it seems like it's because you do so many things so well that there is this like need, and I find that the entertainment industry is very much like this, I certainly experience it, to like put you in a box. And if you can't fit into that box, it's like, well, we need to find a place for you, so there's why all these questions come up.

Why do you think there was this fascination with having to like define who you were? And did you ever feel that pressure? I did. The industry trying to define you. All the time. Yeah. How does this work, just before I answer,

do we need to talk about the food? Do we eat the food? Yeah, come over here and tell us what's going on. That's a good question though, because I want to answer it really well. This is our endive salad. That's the endive salad? That's the endive salad. Oh wow.

And over here we have our blue prawns from New Caledonia, the Pacific Ocean. Oh wow. It's gorgeous. Bon appétit. Yeah I think to start off that question it's like I have always

had that fight because I think things have popped off in different territories, like different things have like popped off, not one thing universally. You know, music was bigger for me in Europe than it did hit in the States in the beginning. but the States really connected with me for with fashion. So I think like the name really levitated and then the product and the sort of like ingredient was different in different places. Does that make sense? What I'm saying?

Yeah, yeah, absolutely. But eventually what I've found is that the name has resonated across the board, which is kind of always what I wanted. I wanted to be a brand. I wanted to be able to say, why not do so many things? And it doesn't lose value because also choose what you want to follow me for. In this day and age as an entertainer, how I view myself is like, if you want to love

me for Rita, the girl that I look at and see how she dresses, or Rita, I'm gonna go to her concerts because I love her music, or the Rita that I see on TV, that's fine, you know? Because I just wanna create a community of people that love what I love. So I was never annoyed about that. I actually kinda was more like, I'm doing the right thing.

Because even if I look at it now, like with people like Jennifer Lopez who have done so much, and you know, she does music and then she had that, she does this incredible run of film, you know, I think she fights the same fight of it being a constant battle about like, who am I dating? And like, what am I doing? And really to kind of discrediting all the work.

But one thing you can't deny is the work ethic. Like that woman is so inspiring for so many reasons, like works so hard, and I say this to her, like whenever I see her, and delivers such great product in her way, and it's her thing. And you know, that's my kind of goal, it's to work around me and like,

I'm gonna do this because I see Rita Ora doing that, rather than being like, I'm gonna try and morph myself into something else. Right. But that's always been my dream to just do branding and feel like I'm creating a world, like an Auraverse almost. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Yeah. Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. Did you, was there a moment, because I know that there's a massive infatuation with you with the tabloids, and that's been something that's, you know, I'm sure has been a love-hate relationship. Yeah, definitely. Was there a moment that you, that sort of felt like,

like I've been thrown to the deep end of this media circus? I think it was like definitely unexpected, because, you know, when you want to do this for real as a real job they don't be like oh by the way be careful of the tabloids like nobody's sitting there giving you sort of like a schooling on how to handle it so like I've just been really well looked after in the sense of like making it different to who I really am. Like I've always disconnected those two things. I don't know how, but you know, that's not me. That's not my life. That's not who I really am.

My life is like hanging out with my friends and doing things like that people don't see going on holidays where you don't see me getting pictured all the time. The world is big, you know? And then it's time to go in work mode. So doing the promo for the film this week in New York, I mean there was like 15 perhaps outside my hotel room

just all night long, but it was work time. So I tried to separate those two. I don't want it to fuck up my creativity, you know? Yeah, I mean it's that double-edged sword. I mean, you know, obviously people are fascinated with people's careers and that brings attention to the things that you love to do. But there's also a price that comes with that. You know, privacy is sometimes lost

and this sort of need to share more about yourself than maybe you are comfortable sharing. I mean, I certainly. Yeah, I do share a lot. Yeah, but also I think, you know. My team's like, you don't need to keep doing that. But I've always been that way. I've always been someone that likes

to make people feel comfortable. And to do that you have to sort of like break the ice by sharing something about yourself. Right, no I get it, I get it. But a lot of the press are doing right now is for The Descendants, which I watched a few nights ago. Did you? What did you think?

I love to see, first of all, I'm a huge Disney fan. Yeah, me too. So there's that. So anything Disney related, I'm gonna read up. I know, I love them. I've done a lot of films here and there, you know, like little cameos. But I would say it's my first substantial presence.

This is a massively substantial role. So you played the Queen of Hearts, and I don't know a ton about the Descendants franchise. Yeah, it's definitely a kid's following, for sure. But I also love that it's sort of like in this Marvel universe where all these characters from different Disney movies interact with one another. I got to recently do a play of villain on a children's show

based on the book series Ivy and Bean, which is popular here in the States. I know the show. I had so much fun playing a villain. I know. And you were so deliciously evil, and you're so wonderful, and like, honestly. Thank you.

I didn't know, I mean, I haven't seen 50 Shades of Grey, so I haven't seen that, but like I. You blink and you miss me, don't worry about it. Okay. You don't need to see that. But I was just so enraptured by how strong, first of all, you're an incredibly strong actress. But you were in such command,

and playing an evil person that is also so glamorous and so deliciously evil and like, kind of in almost like a camp way, but also super grounded. It was very camp. I was inspired a lot by RuPaul's Drag Race. I've seen every season. Me too.

That's also where I get all my inspiration from, not the show, but that's one of the places. The art form, yeah. But just the idea of, I mean, Camp is kind of all I grew up loving, all the old movies, like the women from 1939 with Jane Crawford and all that kind of, that era of glamour was everything. We were named after a Hollywood icon,

Theresa Hayworth. I mean, my grandfather would just play those movies. And I can see why now, because it was super snappy and super kind of witty, and Auntie Mame is one of my favorite films of all time. And so that was where and how I wanted to, like, elevate myself and feel regal. And that was kind of my inspiration

behind the role of Queen of Hearts. And I had the best time just being this sort of like evil, cynical character. Cause I'm not like that in real life, but you know, since then I've just been getting so many sort of requests and offers to just be these sort of evil people and I love it. It was a really great experiment for me to just do something that I could immerse myself in

and it was a moment to prove myself and I bought Zero Ego and I'm a sponge, especially in the world of film and television, something I love to do and explore more of and now I have a husband who is really good at it. You're of course, I just became your husband. Tycho Waititi, he is one of my best friends and he does a lot of film, Jojo Rabbit,

he won the Oscar for it. And I think I really, really respect him and his opinion and it's definitely a world where I love to include him. So let's see, cause we have done some fun things. So let's see. He directed your music video for- Raising You. Yes, yes.

It was all on film. It was great. It was really fun. First of all, the song's a bop. Thank you. And the video is really fun, and kind of the opposite of what I've seen you do, like you're very-

Polished. Yes. Yeah, that's fine. I was very polished until Tyker came into my life and was like, everything needs to be on film. And I was like, okay. Yeah. Yeah, was that the first thing you collaborated on

with him? Mm-hmm. So that was the first time we filmed something together and I saw his work and it was great. And yeah, ever since then we've always wanted to do more. So we're doing more. We just wrapped something up actually together that we shot in New Zealand that hasn't been announced yet.

So that's really exciting. And we're just gonna keep doing it and seeing how far we can take it really because we've always thought that it would, I don't know, we inspire each other all the time and we always talk about ideas and things. One day hungover in a pool and we're like, oh, this would be a great movie.

Or, you know, like, so, yeah. It's definitely a thing we're doing. That's great. Now for a quick break, but don't go away. When we come back, Rita tells me how hard it was to take her husband, Taika Waititi, out of the friend zone and a hilarious travel story involving bones being removed from our foot.

I'll just leave that right there. Okay, be right back. Psst, wanna get in on the best savings hack ever? Only Kudos saves you up to 40% on a sweet phone plan, reliable home internet, and all the streaming you could ever need with Netflix, Disney Plus, and Amazon Prime. That's right, When you bundle with the HappyStack, you can spend up to 40% less a month every month all year long as long as you're with Kudo.

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I mean, from what I understand, you guys were friends for quite some time before you started dating. Yeah. Is that a good thing? I think so. Yeah. And you know, it's tricky because you know,

if you really care about someone and you know, you're putting a lot on the line. I know. When you start dating. I know. Was that something you worried about? Mm-hmm. I was like, do not let this ruin our friendship.

You could say that, but you can't make that not happen. And he was like, yeah, that's fine, then we definitely won't. And I was like, mm-mm. At the end of the day, it's only awkward if you make it awkward. And I think we were both, we're mature enough to know that like, okay, God forbid,

if it didn't work out, like, I think it would have been okay. But five years of friendship, I think, really did solidify like, okay, God forbid if it didn't work out, like, I think it would have been okay. But five years of friendship, I think really did solidify like a great scaffolding of like knowing each other and knowing his kids and stuff like that. And it just naturally then just slid into this relationship which just felt so normal and like not really that different. And then Australia is kind of my safe space. A lot's happened for me over there.

It's really crazy. I think it's like my like good luck place or something. And so yeah, that's where we blossomed and then we kind of got married not long after that actually. Very privately too, which I think is really interesting because it's hard obviously when you're someone who's under such a microscope to have private moments

that are just for you. And I love that you, didn't you do it at home? Yeah, it was just literally us, his kids, and this woman that gets people married on the go or something. I love it. I mean, it was not romantic. It's like the biggest chapel, but they come to you. Yeah.

Yeah. It's like something weddings on the go or something like that. And I think we were like. .com. Yeah. I think we were like 17th wedding of the day or something. I don't know.

Cause she was exhausted by the time she got to us. That's so funny. And she was, wow. My goodness. So you have chow mein, misheat, sancha, puree, uni, and salmon roe on top. Sorry, are we meant to have this like a soup? I don't, I think, well there's a spoon here.

I love that we're afraid to ask. I'm too scared. I don't like all skee-ling my dad about. You do it. Excuse me, some guidance please. I'm just gonna follow you. I'm gonna be really honest with you. I don't like seach and I don't either.

What are we gonna do? I don't know, it's so slimy. It's so slimy. Sometimes, but sometimes I try it and it's actually okay. Do you wanna go first? I'm gonna go first. This thing is, every time. I just don't like the texture. You either.

Oh my God, can you? Okay, walk us through this. How do you eat this? Sorry. So you're gonna want, so the egg custard is at the bottom. Okay, so like this. There you go. Okay, oh okay, I see.

Voila. Voila. Okay, okay. Gosh, we're both doing this. Ready? Okay. Do it. It's not that bad.

It's not bad. What do you think? We're good. I think we're all right. Do you wanna know a secret? She's staring at us. Yeah. You're not a coonie guy?

Neither one of us love coonies. Mm-mm. But we're trying it. I actually like this a lot. Don't lie to me. No, we're not lying to you. I would never order sea urchin. I mean, uni, sorry, but I also like,

they damaged my foot in Jamaica, so I don't like them. Oh, okay, I didn't realize I was just talking about the sea urchin. I was like, what? Who? Why do they, who do I have to beat up? Who's they?

You know they. Sea urchin, okay, I get it. You have a stigma against them. Yeah, and I had to have a full foot operation to get the bones out. Oh, God. And I did a blue plastic bag, and I put it around my foot, and I filled it up with vinegar, thinking it operation to get the bones out. And I did a blue plastic bag and I put it around my foot

and I filled it up with vinegar thinking it was gonna soak the bone out. It didn't, but it didn't stop me from partying. But then I got. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You went on partying with a blue plastic bag full of vinegar on your foot. Yes.

Cause it was my first time in Jamaica and I was not like anything stopped me and not fucking sea urchin. That's so funny. And then I got to LA and I was like, okay, I'm gonna have to deal with this. And then they did and they cut my foot open and took all the bones out, it was gross.

Not of your foot, of the sea urchin. No, my foot. They took the bones out of your foot? Yes, there was like 100 bones in there. Wait, they didn't take your personal bones out, they took the bones of the sea urchin out. Yes. Oh my God. Oh, you thought the bones of the seer chin out. Yes! Oh my God.

Oh, you thought my bones? Yes! Honey, no! I was like, well, maybe that's how they do it. Could you imagine if I just had one jelly foot? No, that is not what we're doing today. Um, but that, thank God that didn't happen. Oh God.

No, and then they put me to sleep. Well, I would hope so, they're taking the bones out of your foot. Anyway, now I'm eating it, so. Well, sweet revenge. Okay, God, where were we? I feel like, even though we haven't had a drink, we sound like we're drunk.

Absolutely. And I love it. I love it. I also love that you then use your footage in your video of you and I. Yeah, oh thank you. That's really sweet. Thanks for watching that, yeah. I think the whole idea behind it was just trying to control a narrative for once.

That was my own. This was such a big deal for me. Getting married was not just something you just do. For me, anyway, no matter how I was raised. So yeah, Tyka was just really supportive about that and I was really proud of how it all turned out because then we were ready when we were ready and that's it.

Yeah, you brought a certain amount of attention to someone who doesn't normally have a lot of attention. True, yeah. Was there discussions had around like how to navigate that or is it? Yeah, especially I think, well, it's interesting because also when you want to, your life with someone, you sort of have to accept their life and what comes with them.

And I think he kind of knows that. He's definitely had a couple of lives himself and he's had his own experiences. And I think he just valued me rather than sort of what the noise around it was. So I don't think he cared in that sense. It was like, I love you, and this is kind of how we're going to do this. And I would do the same for him.

It's like you kind of accept what they come with if you love that person. And so it wasn't really a big conversation at all, actually. It was just kind of like, well, we're doing this, you know? And I love that. I love that bravery and I love that dedication. It's like, you know, I've been through some relationships that they couldn't handle that and it's hard to explain. Yeah.

I'm just trying to understand if I answered your question, but I think I did. No, you did. No, I think it's just great to be inspired by, you know, my husband is such a philanthropist, and so I became very involved in politics through him, and he's also 10 years younger than me, and I think it's something interesting. Can you? 10 years.

So it's interesting, sometimes I, at least at the beginning of our relationship, I would think, you know, I'm so much older than you, like I know what I'm doing, but once you let that go, and you really learn from one another, I know what I'm doing. But once you let that go and you really learn from one another, I think it's a really good opportunity. Yeah, you're both just trying to figure it out. But yeah, me and Tyker are 15 years and it's amazing.

Yeah, I kind of grew up really fast and so we kind of really connect in that world of our parents both having breast cancer and surviving it and the idea of kind of figuring it out for our families and stuff. So yeah, we have a lot in common actually. Yeah, that's lovely. It is, it is.

It's really nice that you have that. What are the things that you feel like you've opened him up to? Music. Uh-huh, okay. I take him to a lot of Queen shows, a lot of gay pride shows, and I have a lot more coming up, and he loves it.

I think he just wants to jump on stage. But it's amazing, because he's just down for the fun. There's zero expectations. Yeah, he's one of us, you know? I love that. Are you mostly living in the UK? Are you in New Zealand a lot still? Yeah, I'm in the UK. I mean I don't live anywhere. My home really obviously is London but I'm honestly never there long enough and I go to New Zealand whenever we can because it's beautiful

and it's so quiet and again there's like everyone leaves you alone. Yeah. And, and LA. So those are kind of the three sports. Yeah. Yeah. Are you still filming the voice and? No, that's done. I do the Masked Singer here. Yeah, I knew that. Which is so fun. It doesn't even feel like work. I can't believe half the people that unmasked themselves. But I always do something like that. I mean, I wouldn't say no. Good to know. You get to know. Yeah. Yeah. But I just have to forget that this happened. Because then if you do come on, then that means I'll be cheating.

But there is ways of disguising that. But that's really good to know. Hi! Oh that looks good. That looks gorgeous. Gorgeous. Thank you very much. Tell the gorgor and the keithia sauce and the moringes. Thank you very much. Thank you very much.

Tell the chef it's delicious. Especially the uni, we loved it. I loved it. I did. I loved the truffle porridge that I just had. Gorgeous, okay. Do you want to try some of this? I want to try it for sure. Yeah, tomatoes are my fave.

Me too. Are you growing those? I am, yeah. I love a good tomato. My first love is musical theater. But your musical theater background is truly really amazing. Do you think that like, that's your sort of favorite?

That's my first love. But you know, I really admire your career and that you have done so much with not just, you know, singing and acting, but also, you know, being the face of Prada. And you're having all these partnerships with different brands that you believe in. I think that's really quite inspiring. I mean, is there something that sparks a real artistic interest?

Do you think it is singing? Music's always going to have my heart. It's the only thing that keeps me going and I think I was reminded of that this year, actually, when I started to do my shows again because before that, I didn't really do a real tour or a show for a while. And I think I missed, I disconnected from that feeling

and it was actually pretty sad because I didn't notice it until I got back on stage and I was like, wow. I mean, there's nothing like it. Like I love performing for people and it just like brings me joy and I've been just crying actually coming off just being like, how have I not done this more?

And so I think now, you know, it's gonna be more about that, like prioritizing things that make me truly kind of happy to the core, like spiritually, like creatively, which is making a record and touring it and doing film. Like I really enjoyed doing Disney and finding a project and a script that like I can just surprise people in like that just keeps me awake at night, you know? I mean, you're still so young. Is there someone that has like a career that you admire that with like, I know? I mean, you're still so young. Is there someone that has a career that you admire

that would, I think it's hard, especially women and the entertainment industry. Especially in music, to be able to say. To have longevity. Oh, so much pressure on us, it's crazy, because of course with age, and then there's other people coming in every week, young, amazing artists, and you have to stay really, really focused

and not get distracted and not try and chase anything. I think that's a big, big, big mistake. Creatively, it's like, that's your journey, that's their journey. I think the people I've loved, like Kylie Minogue, and I talk to her actually all the time, and I ask her, she just says to me, you just have to keep making art.

And eventually people will see your backlog and your book and respect it. That's kind of why I do TV. It's another way for me just to connect. Yeah, I mean that's kind of why I'm doing this too. I love being able to express myself kind of in a more authentic way, not as a character. Yeah, I don't feel pressured.

And have genuine conversations with people who I admire. Yeah, it's really good. I mean, this whole thing has been so great. I mean, I obviously knew you were so funny and vibrant, but I really learned a lot about you. Maybe I should start a fucking podcast. Listen. Let's say without swearing, sorry.

Maybe I should start a podcast. No, you can fucking say it. Can you swear? Sorry, I didn't know. Fuck yeah. How much swearing, sorry. Maybe I should start a podcast. You could fucking say it. Can you swear? Sorry, I didn't know. Fuck yeah. How much swearing we wanted on this show. Yeah. If I come to the UK, can I reach out to you?

I'd love to hang out with you. Can we do a double date? Yeah. Do you come to the UK a lot? Yeah, quite often. Amazing, okay, yeah. I was maybe gonna do a play this winter there, but it's not gonna happen.

Dumb. I know. It's okay. I know. Next time. It this winter there, but it's not gonna happen. Dumb. I know. It's okay. I know. Next time. It's my dream to do something on the West End. Yeah? What would you love to do? I don't know. I mean, I don't have a great British accent, so I don't wanna do anything where I'm expected to

blend in with a British cast. No. Why don't we just make our own play? We could. Or you could write a musical. Yeah. Can you imagine me singing one of your songs? I would die.

I would be so honored. Are you kidding? You know, also, I think we could just bring this in and we can say to Tyka, listen, because I think he's like one away from an eagle or something. He just needs a Tony or something. Oh, let's do it. And he was like, what do I need to do?

I'm like, well, you can write a musical. Right. And we can make all the music. Oh my God, let's do it. That's exactly what we need to happen. This has been so amazing. Thank you for doing this. I really enjoyed it.

It was kind of therapeutic. Oh good, I'm glad. And I adore you. I adore you. And in London, please just text me. I will make sure we exchange information for sure. Yeah. And my number is 21...

Oh my God! Ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! Aww. No, I... thank you so much for... This episode of Dinners on Me was recorded at Amor in West Hollywood, California. Next week on Dinners on Me, you know her from Aquafina is Nora from Queens, The Farewell, and her latest film, Jackpot, in theaters August 15th.

It's Nora Lum, also known as Aquafina. We'll get into her relationship with fame, coming to terms with the grief she carries around the loss of her mom, and how she landed on the trumpet as her instrument of choice. And if you don't want to wait until next week to listen, you can download that episode right now by subscribing to Dinners on Me Plus. As a subscriber, not only do you get access to new episodes one week early, you'll also be able to listen completely ad free. Just click Try Free at the top of the Dinners on Me show page on Apple Podcasts to search

your free trial today. Dinner is on me is a production of Sony Music Entertainment and a kid named Beckett Productions. It's hosted by me, Jesse Tyler Ferguson. It's executive produced by me and Jonathan Hirsch. Our showrunner is Joanna Clay. Our associate producer is Angela Vang. Sam Baer engineered this episode. Hans-Dyl She composed our theme music. Our head of production is Sammy Allison. Special thanks to Tamika Balanz-Kalasny and Justin Makita.

I'm Jesse Tyler Ferguson. Join me next week.