Distractible - Friendship Test: Mark Edition
Episode Date: February 6, 2023Who is the better friend? Today, Bob and Wade's friendship with Mark is put to the test care of some Mark-based trivia! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices...
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Good evening, gentle listener,
and welcome to Distractable,
a Woodhouse production. This week,
virgin engineer Mark throws down the gauntlet and asks his peers,
how much do you love me?
Bob the Question Thief can't
name his BFF's favorite tipple,
but thinks he is a cancer.
And Wade admits to being a shit friend and didn't even know which of his buddy's organs was missing.
Yes, it's time for Friendship Test, Mark Edition.
Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show.
Hello and welcome to Distractible, the podcast where I am the host and judge,
an arbitrator of the quality content that is about to enter your ears.
Welcome, everyone, one and all.
In this podcast, we discuss whatever the hell we want to discuss,
and I will be the arbitrator of what we discuss.
But to discuss this, I am joined by my good friends, Bob and
Wade. Hello. Hey.
I'm Bob. Hi, Bob. Still
Wade. Hi, Wade. Even though Bob and I
sound like the same person, we're two different people,
I promise. Indistinguishable.
Which one of us is this? Couldn't tell
you. Am I Wade? Am I
Bob? I don't know.
Enter on the subreddit if you think
you know. You'll get points if you get it right.
Ooh.
Vote A for me. Vote B for me.
Doesn't make any sense.
How are you guys? Alright.
Not bad. Pretty good, I guess.
Man, this is
thrilling.
Well, I'm trying to say, what do you want from me?
Spoiler alert, this is being recorded before
it comes out, and I'll probably be post surgery when this comes out, so I'm wondering how I will be post-surgery.
Probably fine.
Well, you don't need to wonder how you are in the future.
You just need to tell me how you are right now.
Has anything happened?
Surgery is coming.
You're really worried about the surgery.
Oh, in the past?
What did happen?
Happy New Year!
Did we already say that?
We probably said that.
All right, i've got
something mark okay please save me it's not about me but it's about a thing i enjoy sex i found a
new uh genre of tiktoks where a person gets an ai such as chat gpt probably it was chat gpt to make
a crochet pattern for them to make this person asked an ai to make a crochet
pattern of a narwhal and um it's a little cursed gotta be honest it's a little cursed but it's very
funny because the ai is all make a eyeball and put it on the face and make one fin narwhals have
one fin put one fin on stuff like that interesting you know as ever tiktok good content
i saw a tiktok finally um uh a dog or something with a really long nose trying to get a pringle
and they say let me do it for you and then at the end you hear kirby man that is not what they say
but i appreciate the effort no that is what it says oh you're right it is do it for you yeah kirby is that what's sung though
is it let me do it for you yeah let me do that's the song i saw that that's actually what happened
was someone apparently that's a that's a song sung by a popular artist of some sort someone
sang it in the miss piggy voice it's not like it officially sang my miss piggy but they
sang it in that voice and then they finished it by you know saying kirby implying that but that
was apparently a voice memo that got sent to someone and became a meme sound and then it got
tied to the long snoot doggies pringles and it's a whole thing it's just a voice memo that someone
said yeah does someone literally sent that as a voice memo in like iMessage to a friend and the person who got sent who received it in iMessage was like holy
fuck that's awesome and like made it a sound on TikTok or something wow that's crazy classic
meme status i didn't understand what i was watching other than it was funny because the
Pringles cans are long and hard to get to the bottom i related to that part so there you go
breaking TikTok news from both of us all right
that's been the thrilling tiktok update that we all wait and everyone is like just all hoping for
um so apparently everything's just very boring in our lives and we have nothing new to talk about
which means that you guys know i have a baby now what do you hear about that literally that's all
that's happening is babies are hard and i don't sleep very much and that's it.
Yeah. Well, it brings me to today's subject because we all know so much about each other. We're getting older, guys.
Whoa. Go on. We're getting older. And as we get older, we start to forget things.
And I'm here wondering today if you guys have forgotten anything about my life.
Welcome to How Well Do You Know Mark?
Crap.
We'll put in some game show music.
I forgot your name was Mark.
Well, hold on.
That sounds bad.
But I forgot an update about your name.
I'm sorry, what?
Was there an update about my name? Did you know, what? I was there an update about my name.
Did you know there's a goat named after you?
Like Mark or Markiplier?
A Markiplier goat.
I did not know that.
You know, I didn't.
There's a YouTube channel, the Urban Rescue Ranch, where a guy has like a kangaroo and
all kinds of animals.
And he named a goat after you.
So there's a Markiplier goat.
But I don't think he knows how to pronounce your name.
But he tried.
Interesting.
This is my goat, Markiplier.
Well, he's got more of a Texan accent, but yeah.
Yes, this is a Texan accent.
Markiplier.
Well, you didn't specify.
How would I know that he was Texan?
You know.
Well, yeah.
What are you looking at me like?
I'm dumb.
Who else owns goats?
Everywhere around the world in all kinds of places there's goats yeah pretty much so uh
sorry literally probably there's goats within like five miles of your house right now i would bet
seems unlikely don't uh me i think it's way more likely than you think
i think therefore you're probably right.
Interesting.
Interesting.
All right.
Well, today's topic of discussion, you guys do know a lot of things about me.
Yeah.
So I've created a list of questions that are pretty much ranging from things that you should know because they're very simple to things that are extremely specific.
specific but things that i have talked about either on this podcast or in conversations that we've had all these things you guys probably had an equal opportunity to know about me or my life
i'm a little unsure i gotta be honest but going up against wade confidence goes up pretty steeply
yeah i i want to register a small protest before we begin uh you guys live together for a while so i feel like i'm already together
from august 2007 until what may of 2008 yeah meanwhile that doesn't really count wow so four
years in between where he did nothing and then it's he made some videos but his life was before
that we grew up in the same city i mean there's got to be some equality to the
advantage here no that doesn't sound right well we're gonna find out school together and stuff
right you two grew up in the same state uh-huh yeah which i was also in i guess
enough about me let's talk about you i guess i guess you could throw in the towel already
wade but i'd like to think that you have a good chance at this how many points do i get for throwing in the towel none i'll keep going
i'll let it ride all right so we're gonna start this off easy with easier questions and we're
gonna go round robin so i'll ask one of you a question and then if you don't get it right it
will get a chance for the other person to steal and then it will alternate to the other person
starting the question it'll go back and forth like that right sure good okay because we don't get it right, it will get a chance for the other person to steal, and then it will alternate to the other person starting the question,
and it will go back and forth like that.
Right?
Sounds good.
Okay, because we don't have any way to buzz in that would be actually sensitive.
We've tried that before, and I doubt Wade has something like that.
Buzz, buzz.
Oh, wow.
Maybe if we run out of time, we'll do a lighting round where you can buzz in,
and we'll play it like that.
Great.
Buzz, buzz. But for now, I don't have a way to pick. Did you hear that? Maybe if we run out of time, we'll do a lighting round where you can buzz in and we'll play it like that. Great.
Buzz, buzz.
But for now, I don't have a way to pick. Did you hear that?
Is there a volunteer who wants to go first?
I'll go first.
I mean, if you want it, I'll give it to Wade if he wants it.
I'll defer, but then I'll take it if he doesn't want it.
Okay, Wade.
I'll take it.
I'll take the opportunity to lead the charge because I am that confident.
Okay.
Call you, buddy.
All right, Wade.
Your first question is, what is my favorite color?
Red.
Wrong.
You fool.
Buzz, buzz.
Bob, what's my favorite color?
Everybody knows that Mark's favorite color is forest green.
Yes! The exact
shade! What? The exact
shade? Yes! Oh my god, I was
sort of pulling that out of my ass. Did you google this?
Did you guess? No, I thought
about all the clothes I've seen you wear, and
especially the hats, because you usually focus on getting
in the hat that you really like.
He has a lot of earthy tones, he has a lot of greens.
Forest green. Somewhere in my brain, he has a lot of earthy tones. He has a lot of greens. Forest green.
Somewhere in my brain, I knew that one.
I googled Mark's favorite color, and it turns out there's more than one Mark in the world.
No googling.
You're not allowed to google.
I was just seeing if that's what Bob did, okay?
Right, right.
I did not google.
I will share my screen in Discord if you want.
I'm not doing nothing.
Yeah, this is actually, it's a tricky question to start off with because in the past I've said,
I've kind of like on a stream or something been like, I guess my favorite color might be red
because everything in my life is red. But in all honesty, going back to even my earliest childhood,
I've talked about it. My favorite color is green because I had a best friend in early school whose
favorite color was red and I was like, oh, I really like green. And then I really like green anyway,
just because I like forest colors, leaves and grass.
And it's like, it's just really appealing color.
And I do try to get that color for clothing.
I want to note that you have a tweet.
I don't have the date on it,
but you have a tweet that says,
hear ye, hear ye.
I now decree that my favorite color is red.
It sounds like a bit to me.
Yeah, that's a bit.
Obvious bit. Oh, I'm so sorry. I trusted your words from your mouth. I Sounds like a bit to me. Yeah, that's a bit. Obvious bit.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
I trusted your words from your mouth.
I feel like I'm being screwed.
Subreddit!
Those are my words.
You've experienced my words.
Don't miss your words.
My favorite color is red.
Those is finger words.
Finger words lie.
Oh, okay.
My bad, my bad.
Of course.
All right.
All right, distractible listeners listeners we got another one of
these on our hands they're bonus points for being the correct exact killer it's this it's the first
uh question are you sure you want to burn your your uh challenge on this one no i guess you
might know you better than i do i don't know whatever yeah that's big of you to concede with you know what yeah that's big big of you all right
so the next question bob yeah what is my favorite drink i'm talking alcoholic uh shit i disagree no
no wait i don't think that's true not shit that's not a drink that's not a drink how many answers
does he get he gets 10 seconds uh it is DeSarono. Four.
Wrong.
Wade for the steal.
Oh, wait.
Ah, damn it.
I don't know your favorite.
I don't know.
But I do remember when we first started hanging out, you really liked Maker's Mark.
No, still not quite right.
Still not quite right.
Is it Amaretto Sour?
It is, but I can't give you the point for it. I know.
It's fair.
It's fair.
It was indeed an Amaretto Sour. Whenever I win. Do can't give you the point for it. I know, I know. It's fair, it's fair. It was indeed an Amaretto Sour.
Whenever I went...
You knew that!
Yeah, I'm sorry.
He knew it and said it wrong, so can I have the point for it?
No.
Okay.
It's close, Bob, because isn't DiSerono, like, that is what would be mixed in?
That is Amaretto, right?
Yeah, that's Amaretto.
Damn it.
It would be Amaretto Sour.
So very close, but not quite there.
I've been for a long one today.
You guys have been friends for so much longer than Mark and I have been friends.
So you got to have some kind of advantage.
Did we just preemptively call this one the Wade's a shit friend episode?
Man, this is going to be really sad.
I thought you'd know me. Oh, God. Man, this is going to be really sad.
I thought you'd know me.
Oh, God.
You want me to toss you an easy one, Wade? I thought you knew who I was.
I don't think, no, because if you do and I get it wrong, I'll look even worse.
Yeah, no, the easy ones are scarier.
If you're like, this is obscure.
Yeah, don't pull any punches.
Like, okay, well, maybe I know this, but. If I fucked up favorite color, yeah don't pull any punches like okay well maybe i know this but
all right if i fucked up favorite color i don't know how much easier that one was tricky i'll
admit it was tricky there's been some misinformation about that one all right wade what is my sign
your sign like your astrology oh god five seconds did you google I hear typing no I'm just trying to think
I'm not typing
it's not Aries it's whatever
comes after Aries it's a Gemini
you're Gemini
Gemini right yeah
I totally know about signs and stuff
oh my god
aren't you a wait aren't you a
the crab?
What is the name of it?
Yes.
Yes.
Another point for Bob.
Is it Gemini June?
Doesn't Gemini come after?
Oh no, you're late June.
So it would be the end of June.
Yeah.
Fuck this.
Originally the question was going to be what's my birthday, but I'm like, nah, they'll definitely
know that.
So your birthday is my anniversary and I would never forget that.
I didn't know I had to know fucking spacecraft info.
Oh, God.
God, this is, oh, no.
Okay.
Well, okay.
Not everyone knows the astrological signs.
I get that.
I don't.
I know I'm Aries.
That's the only one I know.
I'm the Bengals and you're the Bills.
Get ready to take it.
Could you ask me like, where did I go to high school or something?
What's my baldest friend's name?
Wait, is it me or Jesse?
Is one of us not friends?
Oh, man.
How do you define baldest and or friend?
All right, Bob, here's one that you might be at a disadvantage at
that Wade could steal potentially.
Bob, what event did I do in track and field?
Discus.
And wait, yeah, you did the throwing ones.
You did discus and shot put, right?
Yes, yes, exactly. Yeah, I was looking for throwing, but I would have accepted discus. So yeah yeah you did the throwing ones you did yes yes exactly yeah i was i was
looking for throwing but i would have accepted discus so sorry wade we went to the same high
school where i did this but uh bob knew this it's fine i'm gonna make a comeback just just do wait
i actually listened to your wildly successful sports podcast so i i've heard you talk about
this recently good thank you i really appreciate that way do you listen to the episode you weren't in there's two of those you listen to my episode uh well friend good friend of mine
did you listen to my episode where i shine
all right i didn't know you were in content. That's indistractable. Man. All right.
Oh, no.
Wade. I didn't know you streamed.
I don't want to play anymore.
Wade, this was a simple, because it's not even really about me.
You really should know this.
Okay.
Because something I said a lot, okay?
Are you ready?
Yeah.
Okay.
Wade.
What is the
hardness of an Apple's watch
display?
Crystal sapphire.
What's the hardness?
Go on. That's part of what he used to say.
On a scale of ten?
Yes. Nine.
Nine.
There you go.
I knew it wasn't diamonds so I just guessed. Oh man. Oh yeah, baby, I know you.
I see that so, I said that so much. I am the most forgetful person on the planet. No, you're not.
Apple Watch has a crystal sapphire display. It's a nine on the hardness scale. I remembered the
first part. You did remember that, but you might have just known that from Apple Watches.
I don't know.
No, I have only ever heard it from you.
Okay, good, good.
So you do remember something.
Wade wouldn't know that about technology, that's for sure.
I barely remember me facts.
How the fuck am I supposed to remember all of you?
All right, I'm going to give Bob a very disadvantageous one again. I I just hope that at the end of this that's the only question I get right
So there's a list somewhere on the subreddit of like what the way did Bob know about Mark?
Well, wait knows the hardness of a watch
Man okay. All right. No, no, no, no, no, it's fine. It's
Okay.
All right.
No, no, no.
No, no.
It's fine.
It's fine.
All right, Bob, what was the name of my dog when I was in high school in Cincinnati?
In high school.
This dog is no longer with us, unfortunately.
Uh-huh.
I'm seeing Max, but I'm really unsure about that. Oh, that's an interesting answer, but wrong, unfortunately.
Wade, what is the name?
He's got to know this one.
Buddy?
Yes!
Yes!
Yes!
Good!
I'm not going to lie.
I was also going to say Max, and then I was like, wait, didn't he have another dog?
Benefit of going second, baby!
You had, have, had, have right now a dog named max had had have had what's the why is max interesting i'm well it's connected to you for me but i don't
remember why this is really tearing up the next question well i preserve my question and i answer
max go ahead keep answering bob so I can take that to the question?
Well, it would be Wade's turn.
He'd get it wrong.
I'm going to defer this question until you guys forget about it later.
Okay.
So I'm putting it at the bottom, which means that...
Oh, no.
Okay, Wade, this one, I'm looking for specificity here.
Oh, good. Great. Wadeade what is my exact order at cracker barrel i order the same thing every time okay you get the chicken and
dumplings yes and god what sides do you get you always ask for them in separate dishes. Is it carrots and rice and an extra set of dumplings?
No, no, no.
You get three though, right?
Yeah.
Oh, Bob, do you know what my exact order is?
Oh, God.
He's right.
I remembered the separate bowls.
I know that you get chicken and dumplings and you get an extra thing of chicken and dumplings.
Yeah, that's one of them.
So what are the other two sides?
And don't you get corn and then
mashed potatoes and gravy ah so close is green beans son of a green beans no one gets the point
ah so close though you guys i'm i'm surprised you remember the separate bowl thing probably
because that's very weird i remember the separate bowls more than the sides yeah and i remember the
one side of dumplings separate dishes and then i think you do biscuits right uh yeah biscuits but yeah the other two sides evaded me it was corn and uh green beans
yeah because i don't like the water i remember the corn very particularly but yeah i'm surprised
you don't get the carrots man i love the carrots i mean i've just whenever i stick to something at
a restaurant i just always get the exact same thing that's fair like i very rarely change um
okay all right well no one disappoint for the
record it is to be fair i think i've only ever eaten at a cracker barrel with you mark once
yeah me too so we did it once on tour we stopped the bus stopped at a cracker barrel and i think
that's the one time really i've seen you eat at a cracker barrel because every time we go to la
usually if i fly to lax we get like denny's because it's right there by the airport and then we go home and then we like order food
and there's there's no cracker barrels in the la area right uh no to be fair though i think that's
the last time i ate at one with you too fair enough all right that is fair but when you guys
come back to la i gotta take you some like we took wade to this great steak place down in glendale
it was like oh fantastic Got to take you there.
All right, Bob, this one requires some knowledge of me talking about my childhood.
Easy.
What significant injury did I experience when I was eight?
It's not, it's too young for the trebuchet.
That was high school.
Eight would have been,
was eight when you were doing the
monkey bars and you fell off the monkey bars and broke your arm no sadly no sadly no wait for the
steel damn it that's too young for you to have had the um oh god it wasn't appendectomy was it
that was way when you were that's college okay i didn't know when you had that was that your guess
nah keep going the only ones i could think of were were high school i don't know the only ones i
remember high school or later ah no one all right it was i jumped off the stairs and i smashed my
head into the banister and cracked my skull i don't know if i knew about that one i don't remember
you as getting hurt i knew that story but i don't remember you getting hurt from that i do believe
i talked about that on the podcast that was the only significant injury of my
childhood that actually required me to go to the hospital oh to be fair though i don't listen to
the podcast did you fall off monkey bars i did fall off monkey bars which was another question
i had and now i gotta strike that off got him but but it's still all tied up with no one getting
that one whose turn is it i've forgotten wait we're tied up with no one getting that one. Whose turn is it? I've forgotten. Wait, we're tied up?
Yeah, you're tied.
Wade's turn.
Wade's turn.
All right.
Wade, what is my mom's name?
Oh, this is tricky because I know your two moms.
I know D.
My maternal mom.
Mom-a-plier.
Really?
I don't think I've ever heard you say her name.
I guess maybe.
Oh, wait, wait.
No, I do know this.
It's mom.
Oh, no, you guessed.
No.
No, Bob, do you know my mom's name?
I watched a documentary.
I watched it.
And I just, does first name count?
Yes, first name, first name.
I remember your mom's name, her married name is Sonak Frank.
But that Frank was like your dad's last name, right?
Yes, you did get it right and you stole the follow-up question again.
Stop guessing other things with it.
You didn't say one name.
You said name.
No, I think you should keep going.
Oh, man.
But I did specify yeah whatever all
right so can you ask me the follow-up question no okay it's my turn so yeah thief no no i gotta
you're stealing all my questions i'm sorry all right he doesn't know that much about himself
bob we gotta quit taking things all right not that interesting there's only so many questions here's a here's a trick question how many toes do i have on my right foot that is literally the
next question i have here it's me right yeah it's like a trick like a like anatomical question like
oh your big toe is not actually a toe it's an opposable slump i'm pretty sure you have five toes correct okay good that's the question
he gets yeah look it was gonna be it was gonna be yours he stole the other one here let me see
can i get how many fingers you have on your right hand no no you can't but i'll give you this one
that you should know oh great it looks like an asshole again No, wait, you got another one. What?
Language did I study in high school German? Oh?
Korean after Korean you didn't study in high school
Classes together I study German in high school
I studied German in high school.
This is going to make me look like an a-hole.
Didn't you take Spanish?
Yes, I did.
Okay, good.
How did we never have a Spanish class together then?
We probably did.
We didn't.
How do you know?
Because I would remember that probably.
Why would we trust your memory of it?
What do you mean?
Oh, nothing.
I took it in junior high too. Were you taking it in junior high? No, I didn't start
until high school, so you were probably a year ahead of me,
which is why we never... Fair enough.
Stupid. God damn it.
Man, it was tied.
It is no longer tied.
Oh, I'm shocked. Bob, how many
toes do I have on my foot?
Hey, did you know it was five?
Wait, on October 7th, 2006, what class was I sitting in at three o'clock?
I gave you probably the easiest one I could.
He literally asked you a question about the high school that you both went to together
that I have never seen or been to in my life.
I knew it was French, German, or Spanish.
I had three options, okay?
That took place before I knew either of you.
Can't give you any more of an advantage
and you had the same amount of guessing that i did there were three languages i knew he took
spanish because we've talked about it you think our high school taught me spanish french or german
you had a 50 50 between spanish and french spanish and french
the high school how many languages do you think they offer wait did you guys see the
miss universe pageant thing did you guys see this meme no no is that one of the questions no but i just it's
very funny there's a meme of i think it was miss universe or something like that and they were
going around to all the women the announcer was like remind us what country you're from and all
the women were like algeria you know like very excited and the girl from France her voice cracked or something and she was just all I haven't seen that one
there's an SNL sketch from this past week
about it, it's a very funny meme
worth checking out
so she just screams France
she was too excited and instead of saying
France, she said
can I have a point for that?
No, you cannot.
All right, Bob, it's your turn.
And man, you're in the lead.
All right.
What is my brother's middle name?
Damn it.
I definitely have heard this.
I'm trying to work it out.
Three, two, one.
No. Wade
with the steal. Isn't it Thomas?
Yes! It was a tricky
question. He and I both go by our middle
names. Yes, it is. Yeah, you both
go by your middle names. That's a point
for Wade. He's back on the board.
I didn't know that. If you had asked his first name,
I would have not had any fucking clue, but I
knew he and I both went by our middle name.
Yeah, I don't think any of you would have heard or it ever been mentioned my brother's first name.
Interesting.
Which I will keep secret for now.
Big seekies.
Wait, this is an easy one.
Oh, God damn it.
You definitely know this, Wade.
It's right here for the taking.
What was the name of my cat when I was growing up in Cincinnati in junior high and high school.
I didn't even know you had a cat,
so let's
go with
Mr. Whiskers.
No. I meant
Tim. You're going to feel really
dumb. Bob?
Well, so then the cat's
name must be Max.
Yes! It's Max.
You both knew the name.
Didn't you?
Wait, why did I think Max was a wiener dog?
You thinking Maggie?
Oh my God, that's a different friend.
No.
I knew Max was a wiener dog, but that's a different friend. Oh, wow. oh wow this is oh i feel i never even met that cat i didn't know that cat existed i never met
that wiener dog i i'm shocked you both know the name because it must have come up i yeah we must
have talked about it i just i never actually met max i don't think yeah well i don't think either
of you met max but it was just something that came up. I figured it would be an
equal opportunity. And I
wait, I didn't think you would forget the name
you literally said he was going to put
off the pet name till we forget about
brain. Max was a dog because I knew
a dog. I know two dogs named Max.
Oh, man. All
right. So I pictured another
friend's wiener dog that was like older
when we were in high school. Somebody cut that. It's just wait saying and I pictured another friend's wiener dog that was older when we were in high school.
Somebody cut that.
Just wait a sec.
And I pictured another friend's wiener.
Now cut Bob saying, I pictured another man's wiener.
Thank you.
You guys done?
We're just loving him out there.
No, I'm picturing wiener.
Mark really tried to tee that one up for you, I gotta say.
I know, I know, but Max was a dog.
It's a dog yeah all right so bob this one is i think will be
disadvantaged for you but it is something that i think we've talked about how and i'm looking for
like the circumstances overall you can be vague how did i get my first kiss uh shit um i have i Ah, shit. I think I do remember us talking about this way back.
But trying to think.
It.
Oh.
Ew.
Now this is the wrong answer, but I think it's all I got.
You learned the, hey there, Delilah on the guitar,
and then that led to a situation.
Now that's, yeah, I know that that's the wrong answer, though.
But that is very interesting.
That is actually with my first girlfriend.
And that was just as we were breaking up
because we were going off to different colleges.
Right, I know.
Wade, do you know the circumstances?
By being with a girl.
You said we could be vague.
That's too vague, too vague.
More specific.
That can't be wrong specific that can't be wrong
it can't be wrong but more specific being with a girl that you knew in a place that was conducive
to a kiss now see that's where you're wrong no i think that's right no no no no you're both wrong
no one gets the point it was i went to homecoming with a quote date just as friends but then there
was someone else that went there with a date just
as friends and i ended up dancing with their date and making out with them oh you told me told me
that told told told me that story before yikes yeah yeah i disagree with your disagreement with
me because homecoming is the perfect place to kiss someone else's girlfriend
i didn't know we were hanging out
with an alpha male stud over here.
I didn't do that kind of shit
because I wasn't cool,
but you know the cool kids.
Sigma, Wade, steal your girl
over on the other side of the Discord over there.
In high school, if a cool kid came up
and wanted to kiss your girlfriend,
you just had to pack up your bags and leave.
We live in a cutthroat town.
Quarterback walks up to high school wait and his girlfriend is like
i'm gonna kiss your girl and wait it's just like okay thank you sir
that's the way you survived yeah yeah definitely all right so no points again uh bob is at seven
wade you're at four points i'm gonna give Honestly, I'm doing better than I thought I would.
I don't, I feel bad.
That just makes me feel bad.
Why would you, why would you say that to comfort yourself?
Because I've got a terrible memory.
Oh, man.
All right.
Wade, what was the first video game I ever played?
Oh, fuck.
I remember talking about this.
Five seconds.
It was a game on the computer with your dad.
Oh, man.
Three, two, one.
Time's up, I guess.
Bob, do you know?
I know the story.
Your dad built the computer.
I feel like this is the wrong era.
I feel like it was earlier than this.
For some reason, Starcraft sticks in my head.
Ah, no.
Man, I thought this would have been the easy one.
No, it was a Super Nintendo game, wasn't it?
No, no, no.
It was neither of those.
It was Doom.
The original Doom on DOS.
That was the first one you ever played?
That was the first one I ever played.
Right.
I had a computer before I had a console.
I knew it was earlier than that.
Damn it.
I thought that would be an easy one,
so I apologize, I guess.
When did Doom come out?
I swore you played something before Doom.
No, no.
Doom came out in 94.
I mean, the original Doom came out, yeah, a long time ago.
Okay.
93, actually, yeah.
I wouldn't have even, I wouldn't have guessed, I would have guessed StarCraft.
Well, StarCraft came out after Doom, didn't it?
98.
Yeah.
I would have guessed something with the Super Nintendo if I was going to, yeah.
Okay, I wouldn't have gotten that no matter what then.
All right, fair enough.
Damn it.
Okay.
I gotta be honest, I'm doing way worse than I thought I would.
No, you're doing pretty good i'm actually the fact that you're winning and i'm losing and we're both you're doing worse than expected i've done better than expected doesn't bode well for
me does it well mark has definitely told me pretty much all of these things we've either
talked about it or it's come up i just have a terrible memory he's never told me anything so
i'm just guessing for everything this is hard you guys don't even know each other. Keeping secrets and living a sheltered life.
We're strangers.
Yeah, pretty much.
All right, Bob.
This one's like, it's in your wheelhouse, but it's tricky.
I don't know if I've ever actually talked about this.
Bob, what type of engineering did I originally do before I went into biomedical engineering?
That you actually studied at school or that
you intended to go to? Intended
to go to. I never actually studied this.
I think
it's possible.
Oh.
I don't know if we talked about this. Five seconds.
I'm gonna say you originally
intended to do, uh,
aero? No. No, no,
no. Unfortunately, no. Wait. no wait do you know before biomedical you said
before biomedical was just mechanical engineering no sadly yeah this would be an obscure one it was
all of our friends went into so i figured maybe you're just going to the same civil engineering
civil engineering because my stepmom worked at turner construction company so i had kind of an
in if i wanted to do that didn Didn't your mom work at Turner Construction?
Can I get a point for that?
I remembered you saying that just now.
No, no, no, you don't get a point.
But, Wade, here's a related question.
When I switched majors from engineering for a semester, what program did I transfer to?
Ooh, Wade's not going to know that.
He's not going to know this?
I don't think so.'s not gonna know that he's not gonna know this i don't think so why would i know that i mean i know it but i just know that also you don't know it uh i don't
know the engineering programs at cincinnati no i transferred from engineering into a totally
different school oh i didn't know you did that so yeah no i've got no idea all right
we didn't really talk much in the middle of college
you're right you're right that's true uh i feel like i've talked about it on the podcast although
all right bob uh well i know you transferred it to dap that's exactly yes you did which is the
college of design art architecture and planning so precise my god that's a beautiful point for you
well done yeah i even i even talked about like when i did parkour and i climbed up the dap building uh yeah that would mean you were going there did you tell
a story on the podcast about doing the art project with the paint that was wrong that like never
tried wrong didn't drive you brought it in and it was a huge fucking mess and you were very
disappointed and i also talked about how i used my engineering to over engineer the first art
assignment where i put way more weight than was required up a higher distance because that's what they asked i don't
think so we talked about that i feel like that was on this podcast i don't listen to this podcast i
don't know i mean that's fair i guess all right i listen to shakira while we record dudes oh man okay great bob what is my oldest korean cousin's name
i know what he looks like i know that he's a comedian and i want to say his name i don't
speak korean at all but i want must say something like young young book or something
like that very close i feel like i just can't pronounce it's wrong wade do you want to take a
stab at this one was it sung what sung did he cut off pronounce it did he did he cut off or sung i don't know
i i said bob was very close but sung is not right he got the first part it's young bay
so you were very close bob and i was hoping that way you could pick up that he was very close but
i i get this this is a tough one so no point point for Bob, no point for Wade. Sung Bae. I could pick him out of a photograph,
but I can't remember his name.
That's fair.
I've never met him, so I couldn't pick him out of a photograph either.
I've never met him.
What do you think I met him?
You just know what people look like?
I watched Mark's video.
What video?
The documentary with the family and the ones where he eats the Korean candies
and his cousins and stuff are all funny.
Wow.
Oh, man.
I love you, Mark.
It's okay.
I'm honest, okay?
Oh, man.
I've been busy.
You've been busy?
I've been busy.
I mean, I know you actually are pretty busy but like
damn I'm sorry okay
Wade's a shit friend
in the episode okay we got the title
you're gonna need to get him
the Xbox for Christmas okay to make up
for all this yeah yeah yeah
alright
I thought he already had an Xbox
that's not the point oh wait I'll get you another
one or something if I remember
remind me if you don't have something if i remember well we'll
see if remind me if you don't have an xbox around christmas all right i'll remind you i do have an
xbox wait not the point wait yeah wait what's my dad's name frank oh no hey wait wait but but but But is he wrong? Yes, he's wrong.
But isn't that like a name for your dad?
No, I actually remember your dad's name.
Huh?
It's Clifton.
Yay!
Hey!
Because he had the same name as where I lived whenever I was going to UC.
That's fair. That's fair. And the first I ever hear that I thought you were like I for some reason
I thought Clifton was named after your dad. I was like, that's so cool. Yeah
That's totally fair and to be perfectly honest
Like I I actually don't know if I could say either of your dad's names like I don't think I would know that one
So I mine's pretty easy. Is it weird?
You're close, but no.
George, George, George, George.
Ah, I do think you mentioned that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Names are tricky.
Like I'm bad with names anyway, so I'm not going to.
I'm bad with everything.
I'm not going to fall you that.
Well, actually, you're not doing as badly as you might think is as dismal as it may seem.
It's actually Bob with eight points to Wade to five points.
So, I discount one of his points because
of how many fucking toes you have, but go on.
I will
give you the softest softball
in the next round. I'll get it wrong, but I'm
excited. If you get this wrong,
I don't think we can be friends anymore.
I can't wait. Oh no.
Oh boy.
Bob! Uh-huh? What organ am I missing? Um, I can't wait. Oh, no. Oh, boy. Bob.
Uh-huh.
What organ am I missing?
Well, I know that you're missing your appendix.
All right, but that's not an organ.
Is that your guess?
That's not an organ?
No, it's not a full organ.
This is part of the intestines.
You are missing.
Two, one.
Your kidney.
No.
Wade, what am I missing?
I didn't know you were missing an organ, to be honest.
That's fair.
That's fair.
Oh, God.
You're missing a heart.
You heartless bastard.
Wow.
Wow.
Okay. All right.
Are we friends?
Are we friends?
No.
You didn't need to be hurtful.
You know, Bob got it wrong too there.
You didn't need to.
It's okay.
This is a tough one.
It's my adrenal gland.
And they removed it.
I knew that you had.
I knew that.
I didn't know that was an organ.
That's an organ, but an appendix isn't an organ.
As I said, I'm realizing that that's stupid.
But I knew that you had your adrenal gland removed, but I thought I didn't know it was an organ, but an appendix isn't an organ. As I say it, I'm realizing that that's stupid, but...
I knew that you had your adrenal gland removed,
but I didn't know that counted as an organ either,
so I also thought it was your appendix.
Oh, no, appendix is a vestigial piece of the intestine.
It's not an organ because it doesn't have its singular function.
Well, fuck, I didn't know the adrenal gland was an organ,
because I knew that.
Yeah, it definitely is.
God damn, I should have just said it.
Is the adrenal gland not just part of the lymphatic system?
No, that's not what the lymphatic system does.
Oh, you might be right.
I guess that is an organ.
I don't actually know, but I wouldn't have got that, I don't think.
I forgot that.
It might be.
Actually, you know, you might be totally right.
I might have misled because as a gland, it might not qualify as its own specific organ.
I just assumed because it had a very specific purpose.
Adrenal glands are two small organs that sit atop each kidney.
Yeah.
Oh, they're organs.
They're organs.
I didn't know they counted as organs.
Yeah, apparently.
While small in size, your adrenal glands are part of the endocrine system.
I think probably someone who actually studied this shit would be able to qualify,
but no one got it right anyway, so no loss here.
All right, Wade, you ready for the softest softball that i have i can't wait to ruin our friendship but even the toes thing
could have been tricky where you're like did he lose a toes at some point this one really is
couldn't be simpler okay what was that no i don't know i that's a laugh that's kind of a laugh sneeze
oh i was trying to turn away from the mic i was like is that the question all right wait i'm a dad now so that's how i sneeze yeah
all right wait think real hard what is my favorite restaurant cracker barrel
i was hoping he would just be like, oh, Montgomery Inn.
Oh, man.
All right.
So congrats, Wade.
You feel better?
I feel like I let our viewers down by not ending our friendship,
but I feel like I saved our friendship by knowing one thing about you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Well, you've known many things about me.
Six things, in fact. You've got six points to Bob's eight.
That's pretty good.
That's pretty good.
That's pretty good.
All right, Bob, have I ever made a video before I started doing YouTube?
This feels like a like almost a trick question because you did a lot of creative things before
you started doing youtube in the period
where you were in the depth i feel like i have to say yeah i feel like you did a live action
video of some sort but i can't remember exactly what it was this is very very tricky but you are
correct but not for the right reason oh okay are you talking about the marching band video
because i don't really get no i did i didn't make that yeah okay i wasn't part of the creative
process so i'm not gonna give you the point wait i will give you the point if you can tell me
what like the circumstance of the video even if you're vague like i will give you a point here uh no no
i don't know what it is so uh no
it was like it was a school assigned video uh corinne was in it i believe uh matt house was
in it um i was not part of like the editing process but he was like acting out i believe uh matt house was in it um i was not part of like the editing process but he was like
acting out i believe the grapes of wrath i'm not were you in the video i was in were you in that
video too no well i didn't even remember you were the video there i don't think it was the same one
no i did one with uh faxton and uh crawling on the ground as a turtle? Corinne doing that?
Or whoever it was?
No, we taped grapes to a bush,
and I was picking them up.
We were probably the same class,
and we all had to do groups.
Yeah, we made a sequel.
But then you should have remembered if that happened.
I love the visual of we taped grapes to a bush and then wade laying next to the bush
like ah the wrath no what they did was they taped some to a bush i was picking them but then they
threw like a bucket of grapes at me and i screamed ah the grapes of wrath and i ran away oh you were
pretty close i knew i knew i was close. We also, we made
fun of like the tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow
speech from, oh god, that wasn't
Macbeth, was it? Which one was tomorrow and tomorrow?
I have no idea. We made fun of all,
were you in honors English?
Huh. I sound so surprised
by that. I was there, I swear.
Man, I really wish I remembered
anything about
anything. Oh boy, alright. It's okay, we weren't the best of friends ever, so I understand I remembered anything about anything. Oh, boy.
All right.
It's okay.
We weren't the best of friends there, so I understand.
It's all good.
Wow.
There were multiple honors English classes.
Were we in the same class?
Yeah.
I don't remember Corinne being in my class.
I was in honors English, I believe, the whole time.
I believe, anyway.
Yeah, but I'm saying there were multiple honors English classes.
Was it Corinne?
Maybe it wasn't Corinne.
I don't even remember.
I was in there with Thaxton.
I don't know.
Yeah, I'd have to see the video to know like I would have to actually look at it
I know we thought I could find that DVD. I will totally post it on my yeah
I got that video we filmed it at Matt houses house his parents house
So he would probably be able to track it down. Maybe oh man. I want to post my first ever video, too
Mm-hmm. I don't that counts my first ever video though. That's fair. That would be mine.
Did you edit it? I didn't edit it.
I didn't edit it. I was just like considering it as a technicality that I was part of it
so technically a video was made with me in it. I just didn't.
You would be credited in it.
Yeah, yeah, exactly. Okay, so no points there, unfortunately.
Sadly. It was right in front of you, Wade.
Man, if I had known that you were in honors English, I would have guessed the grapes of fucking wrath.
You did stuff, man. i'm so proud of you
being as you failed to get a college degree i just considered you an entire educational failure
but i'm learning something about you fail you were decent at stuff he didn't fail he gave up because it was hard geez man all right i'm wade yeah where did i work at
my first ever job i know you worked at micro center and i know you worked in a kitchen at
one point i don't know what order you did things and i don't know if you did something before those
or not i'm gonna go with i don't know what the restaurant was but i'm gonna go with that kitchen sadly no it wasn't the kitchen he was a waiter actually he's
a buster than a bartender weren't you for the tiniest brief moment of time as a bartender but
that is not it yeah he worked there too we work together wade at the same job how do you feel
about that i'm just glad to give more credence to the fact that he should know more than I do.
Y'all lived together for a year.
But you guys were friends.
Okay.
We didn't know each other that well.
Yeah, we were in the same friend group.
We actually didn't know each other that well until around the time he launched his YouTube channel.
Yeah, we never really hung out one-on-one.
That's for sure.
Yeah.
But Bob, for the steal.
I don't know if I know this either, i the earliest employment that i know that you did i think was in your summer job where you built decks that's i don't know if that
was your first one that was actually my second job i worked briefly as a non-food stocking clerk
at kroger where i learned the wonders of minimum wage and union dues.
What did you stock, if not food?
I stocked a lot of adult diapers, the perfume counter stuff, the pharmacy stuff. Oh, I always forget that those rows exist.
Yeah, I guess they do have those.
The Middle Isles.
Yeah, yeah.
So that was my job.
My first gig was Kroger, too.
It was a cart getter, go getter, getter getter and then a bagger and a checkout guy
yeah non-food stocking was great because there wasn't that much to stock and i would just hang
around the makeup like perfume counter that was weirdly there and if someone needed from something
from that i would get it for him which is not often no one's really going to kroger for perfume
and makeup my friend jared and i did some like landscaping stuff and then somebody that was older
like had to be moved into a home,
and someone hired us to clean out their house.
I think were the first things I did.
So nothing official.
Interesting.
Under the table mob type work, you know?
Cleaning out boxes.
Oh, boxes, yeah.
And they told us they didn't really want any of the stuff, so we found anything cool we wanted to keep.
They would say, like, go for it, we don't really care like because the people were kind of like hoarders and we found this
money that had like 10 zeros on it we were like this is like a billion dollar bill and they don't
want it and jared and i thought we were filthy rich we were like dude i cannot believe it and
we looked it up and it was about 20 bucks wait why did what why did it have a bunch of zeros on it was it foreign money of some sort
i don't remember what kind of money it was but it was something where they just like the actual bill
looked like it was like a million dollar bill but but it wasn't legal tender it was i don't know
what country it was from okay so some other countries okay no it was in what some other
country but it was some other
country before they switched currency so it was like outdated you found like a 10 000 peso bill
or something yeah it was some kind of outdated currency from like the 80s or something oh maybe
it was from the euro zone i don't know i don't remember it was in a pre-euro currency and then
they were all in the euro so yeah but it it was worth about nothing, and we thought we were millionaires.
All right, so it's going to get harder from here.
Great.
I'm ready.
No, no, but this starts to, like, well, it gets harder.
I won't preface this with anything.
Good.
So, Bob, what was the other potential channel name that I was debating besides Markiplier?
Oh, wow.
I don't actually think I remember that.
It's tricky.
Your channel was almost called Mark.0, but then that Tosh guy took that and you were like, shit. And you did Markiplier.
No, sadly
no. Wade, do you know this?
Markipie.
Very close.
You're very close. Do you want to take another stab at it?
Markipie game.
No, god damn.
It's Markipoo, isn't it?
No, no, it's Markiplie.
Yeah, yeah, that was your favorite
mark apply he used to tell all of us to call him marky poo and we were always like
i don't know i don't i don't want to do that that's how he introduced himself for the first
time we met even in junior high yeah that's yeah i'm marky poo yeah that's how we became I am Wade, son of George. First of my kind.
And then we never talked again.
Yeah, it was quite an introduction.
How are you from the Conan the Barbarian universe in high school?
What happened?
It was a really cutthroat school.
No, it was Mark...
The original channel name was Markiplier, the singular of Markiplier.
That was actually what I was going to lean towards.
Markiplier was my backup channel that I was like, I'll just do random crap on that while I learn.
And then it became the main one.
So, Wade.
That's me.
How did I burn my hands?
You reached into a fryer.
Hot oil.
Is that your real guess?
Is that your answer?
Well, maybe you didn't reach in. It was with a hot air fryer. Not a hot air fryer hot oil is that your real guess is that your answer well maybe you didn't reach him you
were it was with a hot air fryer not a higher fryer the uh the fucking like wing thing right
oh the wing oil he somehow stumbled into it are you gonna give him that i'm he he said
that's not how you got burned yeah be more wait oh yeah okay okay keep going wait but that's not
that's not like the answer okay bob next time, next time you give an answer, I'm going to make you fucking remember his goddamn social security number
while you're at it.
I will tell this story like it happened to me.
Tell the story.
If you give me the chance.
Because you know it!
It was around that time!
I've told this story to you!
This is classic Mark lore.
Everyone knows this.
I cannot believe I'm being deducted for knowing some general idea of what happened no the question
is how did i burn my hands that was the question i wing oil is a correct part of how he burnt his
hands but that's not how he burnt his hands i don't remember exactly what happened i feel like
you burn yourself with a lot of hot oil what would make that dangerous and or burn you uh if you put
them in while they're still
frozen and the wing oil like starts to bubble out no if you reach your hands in stupidly to grab the
wings eat them while they're cooking no no that's way less close if you go to dump the oil out in
the sink and you're like oh shit which i think is the answer. Wait, no, keep going. What bad thing could happen in the sink with oil?
Water.
And oil when they mix.
Terrible things happen.
And then you try to stop it and you burn your hands.
No.
How would water come out of a sink?
You turn the water on while there's oil in it.
While dumping oil into it.
Oil's coming out because of the
frozen wings and going into the sink, so you turn the water on
and then the oil goes and you burn your hands?
Bob, do you want to give him... Do you think I should give him
the point? I... He somehow
worked really hard for this point. That's pretty close.
That's fine.
I've worked... I'm breaking a sweat on this one.
There's some inaccurate parts, but like
he's getting there.
All right.
We're going to give you this one, Wade, just out of pity.
Thank you.
I'll take pity.
What happened was the thermometer broke, so I had to dump the oil because I couldn't use it.
And so I was going to dump it, and I was like, oh, I can't just dump hot oil.
It would damage the pipes.
You've got to cool it down.
So I elbowed the faucet up, and I did pour water in it while I was holding the pot and it bubbled over my hands that way.
Don't do that.
You got.
Yeah, I know.
I know.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
I can't believe you never told that story.
Listeners, now, you know.
Just you wait till I fucking host another episode.
I'm going to ask you all these fucking questions.
You're going to burn in goddamn hell with me.
You're right.
You're right.
You're right.
This is fair.
This is fair.
Fair is fair.
He's definitely told that story before to us.
Yeah.
I feel like multiple contexts potentially.
And I'm a shitty friend with a bad memory.
It's not a good combo.
Hey, I have a bad memory.
Yeah, but you're not a shitty friend.
You can't take that card.
I got a way worse memory potentially.
We got to test that sometime.
I don't remember you having a bad memory. I feel like we're getting older.
Something about our memories.
Oh, let me tell you about my bad
habits, bitch. Alright.
Wait, if it makes you feel better, I don't know why
I keep trying, but I'm gonna ask Bob a
really tough question here.
No, it won't be. Bob, what was the first
series we recorded together on my YouTube
channel, Marketplier? You know, you, me, and Wade?
We were drunk. It rhymes with
slime waft.
Near rhyme at best,
but okay. What finger
do I use on the left side of my
mouse to click? I'm
removing the question I was going to give you, Wade,
because of the attitude. I'm removing it.
Thank you. I don't have another. No, I'm going to give it to Bob. Alright. I'm shocked. It was going to give you wade because of the attitude i'm removing thank you thank you i don't have another no i'm gonna give it to bob all right i'm shocked it was gonna be
all right bob what food did my mom bring me while i was in the hospital for my burnt hands
oh shit that is a tough one this is pretty specific like i i did talk about this during
the story but it was a small anecdote. Yeah, I remember you telling it.
I just don't know if I'm going to remember this detail.
I don't think I do.
I hope it was bone in hot wings.
Eat this, Mark.
She brought you hot soup.
No.
Because it's funny because you didn't need hot soup because you burned your hands.
Sadly, no.
Wade.
The nicest thing would have been chicken and dumplings.
It would have been.
But given that Bob just said soup and I said no, that's not it.
Well, chicken and dumplings isn't soup.
It's soup-esque.
It's soup adjacent.
It's basically soup.
If you go to Cracker Barrel and order chicken and dumplings.
No, the way my mom makes it well
Okay, yeah, that one's a little bit soupier, but I still wouldn't call it soup
What is soup chicken noodle is the practically the same thing is cut up, but is
Shaker bread and butter
See you know you don't just get the answer wrong you get it wrong with an attitude and see that's
where i have a problem you know i have an attitude it's me you're you're one point down i bring
attitude and flair to this podcast did you acknowledge how hard i worked to give you the
last point that you got thank you and i i let mark walk it along and we just you know just just just be grateful
this generation's so entitled you know bob you are the heart and soul of this podcast mark you're
the brains of this podcast i'm whatever is left and that includes attitude okay all right all
right mr attitude i'm the 10 toes that i have of this podcast do you i'll i'll hope you remember
that for whenever i ask you questions next time.
That's an Easter egg for next time. I'm ready.
Alright, Wade. At what age
did I lose my virginity?
Never fucking virgin.
I'm sorry.
I almost spit coffee.
I know.
5 seconds or something. I'm going gonna go 20 no bob i i know this one obviously yeah you were 17 yep no bob was there nope oh wait i wasn't way it was closer it was 21
i'll take the point nope okay all Okay. All right. Are you going to tell us about it?
Nope.
Okay.
Why would I go to the gory details?
The gory details.
Well, she bit off my ear.
I was like, oh, baby, I'm going in.
Eat my left toe.
And that's why my left foot only has nine toes. Wait.
Were you there?
My left foot only has nine toes.
Now, wait.
I'm giving Bob the question i was
going to give to you that's fine and i hope you feel bad about it because i don't like your
attitude thanks i don't like you friend i know i have the evidence bob what microphone did we
originally use for our live streams oh wow that's such a softball way to get ahead well i don't
even know if wade knows that mainly because i don't know if he remembers the name of it.
Well, then get it wrong and find out.
Give me a chance.
We used to all sit around a blue Yeti on a stack of books and random shit.
Yes, we sure did.
That's a point for Bob there.
Wade, that was going to be your question.
I don't believe you.
It was.
Because the way things played out, it wasn't.
So you can't prove it.
I mean, it's not... That's not wrong, I guess. but it's still my point, so I'm going to take that.
All right.
Wade, did I ever go to jail?
And if so, for how long?
Yes, for six hours.
No.
Bob?
Yes, but it was in your dreams, and you think it's real, but it's not.
See, I don't know if I should give that to you
because I didn't go...
Did I?
Did I go to...
See, I still don't know
because I have such deep-baked memories.
Oh, so if you don't know,
I was supposed to.
Okay.
No, I'm throwing that question away.
Well, I don't have to throw it away.
I was going to give you another question.
Wait.
I'll take it.
That is just a weird trick question.
No.
Okay.
So all I have left are extremely specific things that I don't even know if either of
you are going to know.
I've got three left and they're going to be really weird, weirdly specific.
Wade, what type of tumor did I have?
Oh, fuck.
That feels like something I should know.
You had an adrenal gland tumor in your adrenal gland, which was removed.
Did you know that's an organ?
I'm still, the science is still out on that one.
I'm not sure if it's an organ.
Do you have any further details about that?
I don't know different types of tumors.
That's fair.
I know it was a large tumor.
It was large.
But Bob, do you know the specific type of tumor?
I feel like I'm mixing this up.
But in my brain, I want to say you had a glioblastoma.
Not quite.
Same letter.
Ganglioneuroma.
Glioblastoma is a brain tumor.
I knew that.
I would have also accepted a nerve cell tumor as a general description.
But yeah, I don't know why either of you would have known that.
I definitely heard you talk about that.
I should have remembered. I feel like I got a either of you would have known that. I definitely heard you talk about that. I should have remembered.
I feel like I got a lot of details right in my description.
You were fairly accurate, but also that just shows you were listening earlier in the episode,
and I appreciate that.
And that's what friends do.
You're welcome.
That's what friends do.
All right.
Bob, another tricky one.
What is my car's name?
Your current car that we rode in when I was down there before, right?
Yes.
I would also accept the name of the previous car I had.
Your car's name is Elon's Little Helper.
No, unfortunately not.
Wade, do you have any guess of what my car's name would be?
Mark a car.
Is that really the guess?
Is that what you think of me could you at
least guess car replier yeah come on uh car skirm and lord car 777 because you like bob and i so
much you named your cars after us no that's what friends do yeah he does like us but wouldn't that
mean to be named and friends oh yeah i was gonna say yep good call and friends they were called and cars and mobile okay well that's no it's actually josephine i don't know why damn it and the
other name was roxanne and i would have accepted either of those oh i thought roxy
i might have vaguely remembered that but i didn't think that was right all right i didn't know
either of those things and I stand by and cars.
That's this obscure, maybe, I'm sure you'll remember, the Civic that you had before you moved out of Cincy.
That nice car that you got.
Did that one have a name?
That might have been the first Roxanne.
Okay, because I think that's what I was thinking.
I was like, I think that's the car I'm remembering that like Roxy or something like that was the name.
But that's like way back.
Yeah.
I don't know why I named my cars, but I do.
Like, it's strange.
The only thing inanimate object I really name in my life.
But again, extremely specific.
I didn't know if any of you would get that.
Here is something.
My car's name is?
Broken.
Piece of scrap.
It's a pile of garbage.
Oh.
Because it's MIA.
Anyway. Shouldn't it be called Kia then? Oof. Oh. Because it's MIA. Anyway.
Shouldn't it be called Kia then?
Oof. Oh wait.
That's already a brand. I see why you didn't do that.
Yeah.
It's just the branding that stopped me.
Here is a very obscure detail
that I have talked about on this podcast.
What, and Bob,
this is for you. What is my
first memory of
my grandmother? This is super
obscure. First memory
of your grandmother.
You, your,
you, is this
your grandmother? My
Korean grandmother. Yes.
I'll give you five seconds.
You, you arrived
from the airport and the car ride and everything and
you arrived at the at the family home and your grandmother was standing in the doorway
and and said something very meaningful and touching sounding to you in in korean and you
looked her square in the face and you were like what oh she's oh korean oh shit sorry
no not quite uh that might have happened but i don't recall that way do you have any idea of
what this is yes she you guys were in a kitchen i believe and she was cooking and then she farted
in korean and you said what oh wait that's korean Korean. Somehow I'm horrendously offended.
You really didn't stick the landing on this one.
I just wanted to steal what Bob said and adapt it to be my own spin on it because I have no idea.
I don't like your spin.
I don't like that spin.
It's a terrible spin.
All right.
I tried, man. I tried.
We're friends, right? With that, the game comes to a close.
The real story is that I woke up in the middle of the night,
and I had to go to the bathroom, and I walked out into the...
Kitchen?
Not the kitchen. The bathroom.
Well, they didn't have a bathroom, but they had an area with a chamber.
Grandma was farting in Korean.
Well, they didn't have a bathroom, but they had an area with a chamber.
Grandma was farting in Korean.
She might have been, you know, honestly, she was squatting over the chamber pot.
That's what I remember.
I was close.
She probably was farting, you know, but somehow you don't get a point.
That's the strangest thing about it.
That's the name of the show.
When you host must be a conspiracy.
Couldn't be that way.
Tancer was wrong.
Yeah. You know, I feel like if the listeners were really tracking you know they'd have to they'd have to really work
hard to think how in the world bob won this game oh congratulations how close was the final score
it was bob with nine points to wade you had seven points. I can't believe I did that.
Well, I know you better than I thought, buddy.
Don't call me buddy.
Not after this.
Not after this.
Yeah, you know, Wade, you did get a good amount of answers correct.
I feel like it was the in-between the questions part that really called your friendship into question.
Yeah.
I feel like you answered pretty well, actually.
Mm-hmm, yes.
It was pretty close, you know?
It wasn't a blowout,
but it feels like a blowout.
But anyway, thank you guys so much.
All right, I'm just gonna pout an American over here.
All right, that seems still offensive.
But thank you guys.
I wouldn't have expected you to know hardly any of these.
It really warms my heart, Bob,
that you knew so much about my life.
Wade, you knew some things. I feel like you might have been Googling a lot of these. It really warms my heart, Bob, that you knew so much about my life. Wade, you knew some things. I feel like you might have been googling
a lot of things. Oh, I knew two less things
than Bob, and two of his questions were about
toes. One was about
toes, but, you know, I did give
you many a softball that you just
like, anyway. Toes and a blue yeti. I lost
a toes and a blue yeti. What about the
cat one? That was a dog. Alright.
It was someone else's dog.
Anyway, thank you.
Uh, Bob, do you have a winner's speech?
Uh, you know, it just feels good to be reminded, uh, how much I kind of remember and how much
I once knew and have totally forgotten about my friends.
And, uh, you know, I look forward to forgetting all the, everything else eventually, but we'll
make new memories right that's what
life is about forgetting the old out with the old in with the new and then i'll forget those
memories too because the passage of time forgets no one oh that's so sweet it's so sweet wait do
you have a loser's speech yeah i don't know if we've talked about it here but we do have a podcast
the three of us do called distractible and you guys should listen to it that's good advice for anyone that's incredibly that might be the best loser speech
we've ever had thank you well thank you everybody so much for listening just remember uh memorize
every fact that your friends ever tell you you never know when you're going to be quizzed on it
and it will be the entirety of the definition of your friendship from that moment on um so be
careful with all that information guard it safely and I actually am not looking forward to when
Wade probably will do this
I feel like my performance will be
abysmal oh no I'll give you
the softball question
Wade has three penises
Mark don't forget
Bob what are the nails on my fingers
called
Scrapey Cheeto
the answer was fingernails
but I'll accept it.
Okay, sorry.
Mark, what are the last four digits
of my bank account?
You're going to be stunned when I answer
because I have that information.
Oh, sorry, I meant my other bank account.
Secret bank account.
Anyway, thank you everybody
so much for watching or listening.
Secret bank account. Please follow the podcast for more. Secret, thank you, Cam. Anyway, thank you everybody so much for watching, or listening. Secret, thank you.
Please follow the podcast for more.
Follow Bob and Wade at MyScream and LordMinion777.
My name is Mark Blaar.
You don't know me as well as you thought you did, but no one ever does!
So thanks again. Podcast out.
I look forward to the Reddit where someone's like,
I got every answer correct.
I don't know how they would. That would be terrifying.
Just wait.
It's coming.
Storm clouds gathered over the Redditverse
as the armies began to amass.
The henchmen joined Mark Reign Supreme.
The bobbleheads flocked to Bob's best brotherhood.
But the mightiest tribe attracted many a minion
to world-weight supremacy.
As their numbers rose,
joyously, peace broke out
aplenty.
But could it last?
So hit the Reddit and join up now,
while waiting for the next
Distractible.