Distractible - The Shoe Game

Episode Date: March 17, 2023

Mark and Wade are getting married?!? Well, not exactly, but Bob still wants them to get to know each other using a fun wedding shower game. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/a...dchoices

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Starting point is 00:01:53 Ha, I'll see him on the heath. From pudding poo to culinary-induced arson. Yes, it's time for the Shoe Game. Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show. Hello, and welcome to Distractible. I will be your host for today, and my name is Bob. This is the show where there's three of us, but each week one of us is the host and two of us are the competitors, because whoever won the last episode gets to host the next one.
Starting point is 00:02:29 Points are completely made up. Sometimes they don't exist. Maybe I'll just pick a winner arbitrarily. Who knows? But it's my world, and you're just living in it right now. Thank you so much for being here. As always, this week's competitors and my two co-hosts mark and wade hello hi you look so excited to be here wade why specifically me i am very excited to be here you just look as excited as i feel like you feel on the inside i have covid oh all right that's not very interesting well traditionally before we jump into
Starting point is 00:03:06 the week's competition and or topic we do a little uh like small talk stuff so you know it's been real stormy oh you were saying something i was just gonna offer an intro hang on wait wait a minute it's just been stormy here there's been been like storms in Northern California. There's been snow in some of the mountain areas around us. It's been cold and wet. You know? What? Picking up habits from the baby. Yeah, no, we communicate now.
Starting point is 00:03:39 He does that one a lot. That's just me. What's up with you guys? Mark, you had a hand raised. I had a hand raised i had a hand things yeah so uh new chica explosion update you so i don't like that i just why does it have to be an explosion i was bringing chica into the production office um because we're still in production and we're still working on it uh and so you know she's great
Starting point is 00:04:05 with the crew and she's great in in these social situations she loves people and that was not the problem um but you know it was time to sit down at the desk and do some work and do some writing and do some uh emails and talk to people um so i needed her to sit at the desk i was like can you lay down she's like no no i can't i can't do that and then i was like come you lay down? She's like, no, no, I can't. I can't do that. And then I was like, come on, lay down. And she's never disobeyed, absolutely refused to do something before. Because I was repeatedly, can you lay down? Can you lay down? Snapping my finger, pointing to the ground.
Starting point is 00:04:35 And she was just like, no, wagging her tail super hard. And I think I was like, okay, she just wants to go say hi to people. It'd probably be fine if I just let her out and let her go wander around the office. And then she rounds the corner of my desk and then immediately squats down on the floor and just the most incredible horrifying poop you've ever seen in your life and you know i usually i'm very familiar with the health of her poops this one was nightmarish i don't know where it came from uh and it was mortifying because i'm in an office with other people so suddenly just like the odor picks up
Starting point is 00:05:09 and it just like carries and you know phil has to storm out of the room and i know this isn't a very pleasant story but it's just like i have to commiserate because then i spent the next two hours of time that i was supposed to be doing movie production stuff, two hours with like paper towels and like dabbing the thing. And thankfully John had like- Was it on the carpet? On the carpet, yeah. Oh no. On the office carpet.
Starting point is 00:05:33 Oh no, absorb-y carpets. Yeah, and it, oh man, it absorbs. And I didn't have carpet cleaner or pet cleaner, so I just had this regular multi-purpose like disinfectant cleaner and it was not doing it. So I'd soak it and then soak it with towels and ran out of shop towels had to go to the bathroom steal like the the drying hand towels and that wasn't enough and it was just over and over and over again
Starting point is 00:05:55 and then finally john comes back with like carpet cleaner from the store and i'm like oh finally and it works after three rounds of that she's fine she's fine good just had to deal with that sounds fine i don't want to clean up more poop but i'm sure you understand bob like you can you understand hey babies babies poop in diapers it's again like barring the odd uh blowout which does happen mostly with pee because it's very very voluminous and juicy babies are manageable man everyone complains about baby diapers not not that bad so far i'm guessing it's a different game when they when he's gonna start eating real food here when he gets like six months eight months old and he starts eating you know cheerios and whatever and that might make the poops a little
Starting point is 00:06:40 more nightmarish but so far it's great not like that thing that chica did which sounds like an absolute abomination yeah it was it really was uh do you have any idea did she like eat something weird or something we think it was like we we sometimes get like um you know rotisserie chicken and we'll pull it ourselves uh unseasoned stuff it'll be in like a tub pre-shredded and it's like that's a nice little treat for them um but there must have been something bad in this chicken or something like that because she was fine before and then no but she's fine she's fine again immediately like she's in good spirits and she's in good health now just like a one-time thing she did not like that yeah that
Starting point is 00:07:19 won't ever happen again tomorrow that reminds me i don't know if i ever talked about this on the podcast did i ever tell you guys i got covid manny and i both got covid over this past summer last year and while that was happening obviously we got it because we went on a trip because we thought that we could do that and have any consequences and that was stupid thanks and we picked lexi up from like she had been at like the doggy hotel whatever the kennel and she got home and she was having an issue where i guess she learned she could poop inside at the kennel because they were just clean it up and so while i had covet over the summer i was in the bedroom isolating trying not to get mandy sick she eventually did get sick which was really unfortunate but while that was happening i was trapped in the
Starting point is 00:07:59 bedroom and lexi kept pooping everywhere so that was, and it was kind of all Mandy's problem. Because I was like isolating, tried not to get her COVID. Dogs are funny like that, isn't it? You're doing something normal. And then something that's never happened before just comes out of their asshole. You know what else is funny like that? Cats. Cats aren't funny.
Starting point is 00:08:20 Our cat, I guess, found a new pair of pants that I had while we were gone and decided to poop on them. So we got back from our trip and we were both, Maul and I were both sick with COVID. We felt like crap. So we got home and whatever we had to do, went to bed. I woke up in like the middle of the night, had to use the restroom, couldn't go back to sleep. And one of the many times I got up in the night, I went to go into the restroom, sat down, and I was like, something feels funny. I looked at the bottom of my foot and I was like, what is that?
Starting point is 00:08:49 And I, it doesn't smell weird or anything. Okay. Odorless poop? Well, it turns out that's the first indication that I'd lost my sense of smell was because it was probably not in fact odorless poop. But I didn't know I didn't have my sense of smell. Oh, no.
Starting point is 00:09:04 So I had mystery dirt on sense of smell. Oh no. So I had mystery dirt on my foot that had no odor. Just wade in the bathroom, look at his foot like it picks a piece off like You're not far off. It looks like poop but it doesn't
Starting point is 00:09:18 It doesn't taste like poop either. It's just floor dirt where do we get what molly where did florida come from oh well thank god i did not taste it but i did use like toilet paper to pull it off my foot then i was like hey if you're ever in a position where you have to eat some poop and it's not a thing that you're into get covid first problem solved perfect time i mean it would just be the texture that'd be weird but yeah blend it up it's like pudding i like to have disgusting episodes you know me guys yeah maybe had a few scratches he's like oh floor dirt perfect to rub in my wounds. Floor dirt. Hey, that's dandelions.
Starting point is 00:10:05 I scuffed my elbow up the other day, and I was like, bro, that really hurts. Oh, God, some dirt. There's the magical floor dirt. It comes in pellets. Oh, well, nine minutes in, people probably have safely skipped. You've reached the point where the poop section has ended, everybody skipping forward. Now rewind and listen. Go back. No promises. No promises. We'll'll see what happens we'll see where this goes no i dare not speak more
Starting point is 00:10:31 i dare not there's your poop update shit happens people shit happens well today's episode i think you're gonna enjoy it i think we're gonna have a good time this is a game that um is played often uh in certain contexts between people who are dating and you know we're pretty close on the show i feel like we've bonded and and grown together quite a bit so it's almost like are we edging oh it's almost like you two are a couple you know you're like work you're like a work couple. We're all kind of together like that, but you guys know each other pretty well, so I thought this would be a fun game. But before we get started... I accept this.
Starting point is 00:11:11 I'm going to ask you guys to look around your spaces, because we're on video now, so we can do video gags, and find anything that you want. One thing needs to represent yourself, and one thing needs to represent your competitor. It can literally be a notepad where you write your names on it it can be a shoes could be markers of different colors anything you want i'm just gonna need you to have things in your hands just for like a prop well you gotta hold them up you're gonna show you're gonna hold one or the other up as a form of like voting almost so anything you want i know you live in a pile of garbage, Wade. So you have tons of interesting things all around you.
Starting point is 00:11:49 Thanks, man. I appreciate it. Tell me the floor of your office isn't littered with literally costumes and technology and whatever right now. Okay, I got it. Do I have to tell you that? I would like you both to hold up the object or whatever that you got that represents Wade. I would like you both to hold up the object or whatever that you got that represents Wade.
Starting point is 00:12:10 I got a plastic bag. Yeah, I saw that. Thank you. That's very creative, Mark. And then hold up the thing that represents Mark. Jesus Christ. I have a knife. I have a knife. I have his scalp.
Starting point is 00:12:30 That's why he's wearing a hat today. Thank you. It's not like a knife. It's just a steak knife that I was using to open boxes. Don't get too excited. I'm Elmo in a bag and Mark's a wig and a knife. Yeah, you're a bag and Elmo. knife yep that's accurate both those are accurate reflections of you who you are as people this really says a lot am i allowed to know why i'm a bag you know
Starting point is 00:12:53 you ever feel like a plastic bag floating in the wind i feel like that is reminiscent of you does wade know that song reference smooth and crinkly that's you well i guess that part's kind of like me i don't know if i'm ever blown in the wind i'm more like a rock that just thuds on the ground and stays there wondering why he's that is a song actually though do you know that song do you ever feel like a plastic bag blowing in the wind i'm familiar with katie okay good we might have to uh distort that audio so that we don't get copyright claim for my beautiful singing was very much spot on it was like katie was in the room i'm glad you have your props because the game that we're playing today is
Starting point is 00:13:35 i guess normally called the shoe game but i couldn't assume that you guys were wearing shoes and also you couldn't trade shoes this is a game that's frequently played at wedding showers in particular where the uh married couple to be sit back to back and they take their shoes off and each of them has one shoe one of their own and then their partner's shoe so you guys have your props and then i'm gonna ask you some questions and before we can discuss and you can explain and whatever but before we discuss anything, I'm going to ask you a question. The questions are like, who's messier? Who eats spicier food? Whatever.
Starting point is 00:14:12 You pick, and then at the same time, you hold up the object that represents your choice, and then we can discuss. We're going to wait until you say three, two, one, go, right? Yeah, it'll be quick. I'll say the question. It'll be like, okay, ready? Raise your hand, and then we can discuss. But don't discuss it beforehand okay all right don't cheat i understand so we're supposed to raise our props
Starting point is 00:14:31 at the same time you raise it the same so you're not influencing each other and i will say the way that you get points today is going to be uh who whomever i agree with because i'm also going to be deciding in my head but we can discuss so after you've both made your choices I would be glad to hear your rationale or if you're unhappy with my selections you can try and change my mind okay so I think we all know how that's gonna go anyway you guys are gonna be married within the month it's a beautiful day we're outside at our favorite park with some delicious finger sandwiches and uh and other crudités and whatnot and we're going to play this lovely game for the happy couple i feel beautiful so thank you
Starting point is 00:15:12 how beautiful i feel so beautiful right now there'll be more of that later all right and then we're going to ease into this so some of these some of these questions might seem silly but we can get to the juicy stuff later all right first question fillers who is more likely to leave dishes in the sink overnight raise them up well i can't see a knife why are you blocking your face with it? You have the whole frame of the camera to hold that up. Oh, because I don't see the whole frame. I just see the sectional. I know it's zoomed in, but it's recording the whole width.
Starting point is 00:15:56 How much width do I have? So I don't actually know this about Wade. I know this a little bit about Mark. And you do leave dishes sometimes. It has been known to happen. I know what Wade's going to say because he never lets me forget about it i put this up preemptively to thwart the the one story about how oh just because i left some boiled eggs that i forgot that i cooked on the counter for a few weeks doesn't mean that i and just because i'm holding one of my technically a
Starting point is 00:16:28 dish it's a steak knife that's not in the sink it's in my living room but just because i was using it a few days ago oh well that really undercuts my point so i'm trying to get ahead of the curve here because i have a funny feeling that I'm going to be, I'm going to be roasted here and I'm trying to anti-rose myself. Overnight, the answer was both of us. But I was also playing my opponent slash spouse here because I knew he also knew it was him. I'm going to be honest. Molly is so much better about doing things like that than I am.
Starting point is 00:17:03 So I'll leave something like, I'll get that in a bit and she'll be like i cleaned the whole kitchen like the whole kitchen will be sparkling she'll have done all the dishes i'm like thank you she's like you're welcome whatever whereas i'm just like hey i'll do it later hey i'll do it later i am the do it later person but weeks or days it doesn't get to that with me but i know someone who sometimes it does weeks is a stretch for me but i'm definitely the guy who's like i'll do it later i'll do it later oh this is more than one entire dishwasher load oh no this was really i also can't help but emphasize that that particular live stream that we smelled the eggs the whole time was also the same one where mark ruined his phone number by doxing himself
Starting point is 00:17:41 it was a really bad live stream was that in that apartment where that there was some really funny and or funny in a failure sort of way live streams that happened in that specific apartment yeah yep good old skype and it's incredible security yeah yeah it would be so crazy because people don't realize like before the days of discord you know like the days of trying to network with people was not as foolproof as it well it's not even foolproof now but it was much less foolproof so like communication was on skype that's what everyone uses skype has your ip address to anybody that was would look you up they didn't even really have to know your username they just have to narrow it down i could like google you through the skype like user database almost it was exactly
Starting point is 00:18:29 weird and you would contact skype and be like hey this is a problem they'd be like oh that's not a thing and we're like yes it is i i can see it i could see that right there and it's just like so when discord came along it was like no wonder everyone immediately jumped ship because skype was just like so bad and they wouldn't fix it in any way so of course discord swooped in that's what everyone uses now well in team the other option i will say was team speak right i don't i had a team team speak ventrilo yeah i guess it's not like a super high bar i'm sure some people will laugh if you're good enough at computers team speak was pretty good back then but it took some like doing right it wasn't like
Starting point is 00:19:10 discord where you you can get an invite on your phone in the form of a qr code or you can send it was like you had to you had to know the details and figure out how team speak worked and if you would all struggle with like tech stuff it would never work right it wasn't a problem for me but I know I knew people who were like I fucking hate TeamSpeak it never fucking works you would have to either rent your own server or set up
Starting point is 00:19:36 a server in your own home which also opened you up to everyone knowing what your IP address because that's how they would connect to it. Ventrilo was similar there was a lot of server rental there the idea of just going into uh discord and being like i'm going to create a server one button two buttons name it done and all the rules and stuff yeah and everything was just there these rules all this stuff that was so much more difficult it's shocking it took that
Starting point is 00:20:01 long to for something like discord to come around Like it was people do not realize just how people were dying for that. No wonder it sold for like a billion dollars, right? That it's completely free to to use. You basically don't miss out on any of the meaningful features by not paying a single penny to Discord ever. We're not sponsored by Discord. You guys remember the early days of like Minecraft and recordings, though? We had TeamSpe speak or Skype.
Starting point is 00:20:25 We had like the randomly hosted, like we had to figure out for each game we wanted to do. If it was just us, we had to figure out a way to like host it. Log me in Hamachi days. Oh yeah. Log me in Hamachi. Log me in Hamachi.
Starting point is 00:20:36 All of those things. Oh, the good old days. I think it's this computer that I'm recording on that I've had for such a long time. It has Hamachi installed on it, and I cannot uninstall it. I have tried. I went into the Windows program manager thing, and I went into the file systems.
Starting point is 00:20:56 I was like, I think I've deleted everything. But sometimes it'll just be like, oh, LogMeIn's running. Do you need to create any networks with your friends? I'm like, no! Get off of my computer jeez oh wow that that takes me that takes me back all that to say what point for both of you are you agreed with us yeah i well i don't know your habits that well wade but i will say i've seen mark's habits and it can mark and i are very
Starting point is 00:21:25 similar so i'm not judging at all but it can go for a little while dishes can sit i admit it i fully admit it yep this episode is brought to you by tresemme once silky smooth hair that's still full of natural movement the tresemme keratin smooth weightless collection is your simple solution this new collection features a wide range of products from nourishing shampoo and The Tresemme Keratin Smooth Weightless Collection is your simple solution. This new collection features a wide range of products from nourishing shampoo and conditioner to lightweight heat protectants and a silky smooth serum for a sleek finish. Wave goodbye to frizz and say hello to three days of smooth hair with the Tresemme Keratin Smooth Weightless Collection. Visit Tresemme.com to learn more. Whoa, what are you listening to this for? Wait, who's talking?
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Starting point is 00:23:19 only because i would well are we allowed to give our reasoning i would say the only reason i'm putting me i think mark cooks a decent amount i don't cook very much yeah i've never seen you cook mark has cooked delicious food for me on multiple occasions and i've been very impressed with cooks and like my family cooks i'll help cook i don't really take initiative to cook i can do it i'm not bad at it but i don't do it very often so i feel like i raised this up for pure experience i think mark has experience well i don't okay i just thought of her i'm arguing against myself a little bit here but because you don't cook you don't have a you won't have an occurrence like the number of statistical times i cook because i i nowadays cook like every other day at least one meal it's a simple cook but I use
Starting point is 00:24:05 equipment and like the sims it's kind of a quantity thing if you before your sim eventually burns the whole shit down you know fuck maybe it was me just because I'm turning the appliances on if I have to cook one time and I don't have my experience built up the first time I do it real life isn't the sims you just compared you made the comparison i can't argue with this man it's like in the sims it's like what if i did that too much it's not the sims though stupid it's only the sims when it backs up my point stupid by instinct i'm trying to gaslight you i'm sorry you both get a point for that because i believe that's true but wade if you absolutely had to like molly is out of the picture for some reason your in-laws are coming over and they expect a homemade dinner do you have like a recipe in the
Starting point is 00:24:55 bag do you have like wade spaghetti meatballs or something that you can cook i have like family recipes and my mom has given us like a recipe book and actually the one thing we're still waiting on is we've asked her for like all of our home recipes. And even if I don't have one in the book, I'm confident. Like I remember making dishes in high school and stuff and trying to like follow my mom's recipes. The only reason I don't want to cook
Starting point is 00:25:14 is because I know I would get way too into it and I would like want to do it perfectly. So I have no doubt that things would turn out well. I just don't want to put that much effort into it because I would want it to be perfect. And I'd be frustrated if like the presentation like if something was slightly off so i have no doubt i could do it i just don't want to do it i want to eat some home-cooked wage food someday yeah i would like to too there's something kind of freeing about it
Starting point is 00:25:37 when the more i cook i mean i'm not doing recipes or stuff like that occasionally i will the more i cook the more i just get uh my my, if anything is going into going into the pantry and being like, uh, this, this, this, I'll just heat these up. Like, uh, before I left for the movie, it's like, I, I went into the pantry. I had like a can of skyline chili, instant mashed potatoes. I had some cheese in the fridge and I'm like, will it work? And it worked and spam i had spam so i spam uh skyline chili i fried the spam i heated up the chili i made the mashed potatoes and i drizzled the cheese on top it was fantastic it was really good the spam is hard to imagine the rest of it i mean i love spam you have to imagine spam is kind of just like bacon once you if you fry it upright
Starting point is 00:26:22 yeah if you fry it in oil it develops flavor a lot yeah i want i'm not a hypocrite here because i haven't really cooked for either of you guys either i don't think but i many a night let's have a hot pot pot what's it called let's have a hot little pot pot are you talking about a potluck yes Mark? Yes! Pot, pot, pot! Oh, no! No, no. No, we should have... That could be a whole episode.
Starting point is 00:26:49 We could have a special distractible episode where we do a potluck. Then you'd really have to watch the video where I feel like you'd lose a lot. Us sitting around like, no, that is good. Look at the color on that. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:03 Whoa, this dish is designed. Well, i believe in you wade i bet you could cook thank you i should have curated these questions a little better man wait maybe we should throw the listeners a bone like you know we haven't we don't have enough world war ii era planes flying through our scenes anymore we don't have enough bomb defusals or me in an air duct you know i give them something full studio production from here on out sets and costumes and everything uh well uh we can sort of skip over this one you don't even have to answer i just feel bad that this got left in here but i want to point out that uh the third question on my list is who has better hair i just i got i i use some references for this wow bald is beautiful my friend and i pull off bald like no one can believe even when i'm sick as
Starting point is 00:27:55 look at his beard i will admit your beard is better than mine bold point to wade no thank you but that that puts it on the historical that wade has better hair than me people are gonna take that away no mark you got it going up here but you've tried here and failed mark we all know your body hair situation being being uh part korean as you are, you're basically a shiny little Ken doll below the neck. No, no, look! Uh-huh. Look, I got some hair.
Starting point is 00:28:31 Look, look. It doesn't show on camera. Oh, I know, yeah. Look, it's there, it's there. I see some little tufts. You're right, you're right. The first nipples on Spotify, everyone. They're going to make Will edit them out.
Starting point is 00:28:47 You are going to be a Kim doll. You know, they could just put a sensor bar. It's not like he has to go in and track my nipples and use skin to replace it. All right. Anyway, good point, Wade. That's my bad, but that actually worked out. It's fine.
Starting point is 00:29:05 I'll take the hardball questions. I'm not a coward. I can't believe Wade gets the better hair point. Wade has the best hair. You know, I also hosted the episode called Hair. That's true. Wade's the hair man. I'm the hair man.
Starting point is 00:29:17 Come to me for all your hair advice. I got you. Can't talk hardly, but I can give advice. All right. Next question is the important questions. We're really getting to the bottom of who's what and who has which and so on who between you two is more of a daredevil and hold them up i said daredevil not masochist yeah i knew someone was gonna say that it's not that i'm
Starting point is 00:29:43 a masochist but i'm i'm willing to do a few things. I'm willing to do something. He's both. Oh, well, I mean, you both agreed. I was hoping you'd stick your neck out there, Wade, because you've done some stuff. You've seen some stuff. And you survived. Yeah, but I am a, I am, listen, for a second, I'm not a coward.
Starting point is 00:29:59 I'm a coward. And my self-preservation instinct is very high. I am God's gift to this world, and I need to be protected at all costs. I'm the main character of... No, I just, I don't like, I feel like there's enough bad things that have happened where I've tried not to have bad things happen. I feel like if I'm gambling even a little bit, it's like, dude, what are you doing? You know your luck shit.
Starting point is 00:30:24 Wasn't trying to lose my dad. Lost shit. Wasn't trying to lose my dad. Lost him. Wasn't trying to lose everyone else. They died. Wasn't trying to lose my hair. Where'd it go? Different injuries throughout the years. Like, trying to play it safe.
Starting point is 00:30:34 Like, shit goes wrong around me all the time whenever I'm not risking things. The last thing I need to go is out of my way to, like, let me jump out of a plane. Okay, fucking idiot. See how that goes for you? Because my parachute would be the one that doesn't work or maybe you say like hey you're you're accumulating a lot of good karma and you can uh you can go out there and spend some of it you just gotta go down the karma warehouse and cash in your certificate hey you can have this one i concede mark you're the
Starting point is 00:31:00 daredevil you're the masochist hold on that wasn't the question it was daredevil daredevil. You're the masochist. You get both. Hold on. That wasn't the question. It was daredevil. Daredevil. It was daredevil, but I feel like we answered both. Well, Bob, you said not masochist at the top of it. So it's a separate question. Did I lie? Did you? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:31:18 I'll say masochist first, both. Oh, okay. Point to each of you for being correct and an extra point to Wade for being even more correct. These fields are highly irregular. Thank you. How possibly could this be? You know what, Mark? My bowels are highly irregular, Mark.
Starting point is 00:31:30 This is right on track. Maybe you just need to start being the guy more and Wade needs to not be the guy and then you'll win. Here's one. Here's a tough one. Here's a toss up for how well I know you both. I'm interested to what you think about this. Who is the most stubborn? Hold them up.
Starting point is 00:31:46 Wait. Yeah. Interesting. Why? I don't know. I'm pretty stubborn. Yeah, because I'm pretty stubborn too, but I feel like I've gotten better
Starting point is 00:32:03 at opening up to new experiences trying new things and being less bullheaded and only focusing on things that i really really know but wade you still won't touch a taco oh is bringing up tacos here come here comes all the comments in the subreddit about the tacos. That one thing I don't enjoy the taste of. You're right. Train burgers. Like, you're very set in your ways as you get older. You become more.
Starting point is 00:32:30 Do you want to come lick my foreskin? Because it's about the same amount of effort that I would want to put into a taco. What the fuck? Wait till we're married. My God. That's a little. Well, that day's coming today. I feel like you're becoming more like setting your ways.
Starting point is 00:32:46 Like you've been saying on the podcast just the past couple of weeks, like, I don't want to go outside. My nutrition is like my chicken wings and whatever you do. All this happened to me by going outside. You're getting set in your ways. I try new experiences. I'm less stubborn. I'm stubborn on something.
Starting point is 00:33:03 My two weeks of having COVID has been set in place. You're setting your ways. Look, it's all done. I'm starting to see a pattern in your behavior. You're sickly. You don't want to go out. You're coughing. You're always wearing robes.
Starting point is 00:33:17 That's a stubborn thing. Don't like tacos. You can't taste anything. You're a different man. Don't like tacos. You can't taste anything. You're a different man. If you were to get the image of who's like the old guy on the porch yelling at the use,
Starting point is 00:33:32 like, I don't know. You kind of fit that bill a little bit. You kind of fit the bill. That's because I got gray hair. I got some grays. These words have different connotations, but I will say both of these things are stubbornness related, but I think you're right i agree weight is more of a of a curmudgeon i feel like it's a good word right you're getting you're getting like you're like a grumpy old man sometimes not always thank you you give off a
Starting point is 00:33:57 little bit of a get off my lawn type of vibe sometimes with some stuff but mark you're more like persistent like i would say the things that you're stubborn about are when you're obsessed with an idea like when you're working on stuff you're working on in space or whatever you're obsessive and stubborn about doing what you have to do to make that thing like the best possible version of it you can it's like a different version of it and i don't know if either of those is really stubbornness but like you work yourself to death on you know if you have a project and you're really passionate about it it does not matter if you are hurt or sick or whatever you are stubborn to the point of you work on it and you no matter what it does to you or to your body or to your
Starting point is 00:34:41 health you're very stubborn in that way so i don't know which of those is more stubborn is it more if we're if we're talking about an idea and mark feels strongly about it and one of us feels strongly about it i feel like i'm more likely to cave in to what mark wants to do because i feel like i don't want to deal with his stubbornness on it that's not to say i would also be right like he's probably also right he's pretty smart he made the whole markiplier thing work all right but also whenever he's like focused on something like i ain't getting in the way of that train because i'm not going to derail it i'm just going to get run over i didn't do this consciously but i like that this is structured where if mark wants to no i was just gonna say let's argue against his own like vanity or whatever he's got me like in check right
Starting point is 00:35:26 now i'm like you can't wait thanks for asking dude you're just asking for trouble with that calm down i don't know are you conceding mark or are you structuring your argument? I'm just saying, just because he... Are you too stubborn to give in and admit I'm right? No, I'm going to gracefully concede because it's not worth the fight, you know? If it is what it is, I'm just going to roll with the punches, man. Wait, does that mean I win or lose? If he concedes that he's stubborn...
Starting point is 00:36:02 A point to Wade for being right, but then a point to Mark for growing as a person and being less stubborn. That feels fair somehow. All right, okay. I'll take it. Don't worry, I'll change next time, guys, I promise. I'll try not to have COVID.
Starting point is 00:36:22 That one felt a little personal, and I like that, but i don't want anyone to fight or get how did hair feel you won it you won it that's true you're you're so wily that somehow you won best hair on this podcast i feel like that's impressive but uh this one should not be very personal or contentious i just want to know between you two who's smarter three two one hold them up interesting i i think there's a difference right this is like a common thing it was like smarter because like what is smarter i think quick-witted i I would say Wade, because of the speed at which you can do things. I might say I'm more imaginative just because like I... Creativity, you've got me by a mile. I don't consider myself the most creative person. I'm witty. I'm not super creative.
Starting point is 00:37:14 I think book smart. We were both pretty up there. We both did well in school and such. I think you have me in motivation. You're more motivated to work. And I think that your drive is higher. And that's gotten you further. You've learned things like all the different technologies.
Starting point is 00:37:30 I remember back in the day with editing, you were showing me websites like Lynda and other things to learn how to edit. And I was trying to like get into that and learn it. But I just didn't have the drive to do it. And then like looking at you edit now, you can edit like movie worthy things like relatively quickly.
Starting point is 00:37:44 And I'm still like trying to draw. It took me two hours to figure out how to crop in Premiere Pro. like looking at you edit now you can edit like movie worthy things like relatively quickly and i'm still like trying to draw it took me two hours to figure out how to crop in premiere pro like last week um i think you have an editor i think yeah yeah yes it is i had to edit anything like two years i was just like i want to try this it depends on your definition of smart but i would give it to mark in the drive and motivation category that pushes i would say like when it comes to information and logical reasoning like i mean you went to school for that basically um because i have strong beliefs that doesn't mean that i've logic through them uh and also like i can't i still to this day i know my memory is shit uh both in terms of short term and and just names i can't
Starting point is 00:38:23 fucking i never remember names and i don't know why i could see it either way it's just like your definition it's a toss-up i think it's good that we both put an opposite one up i think wade i don't disagree with both of you that both of you have strong suits but wade argued more towards um drive and and uh work ethic well and just knowledge he knows more about like editing change it i'm reminding you like you argued further away from like smart as a broad and meaningless word and mark pointed out more that like you are very logical w Wade and classically more like smart in the, you know,
Starting point is 00:39:06 in the philosophical ways. Not so smart now. A smart guy is intelligence. Let's break it down. What is smart? No, don't smart on me. Okay.
Starting point is 00:39:15 The smart time is over. Make a fart joke or something. Come on. Yeah. Dumb it down for me. Here's a joke. It's me. I was the joke.
Starting point is 00:39:24 I don't get it. Oh oh you needed to point at yourself or something i didn't understand what you meant i did it must not have been in frame oh not that oh there it is ah ha okay um point for me point for mark yosh for being the dumbest dumb dumb on this bliss audience be stupid you'll get points. Dumb and I have bad hair. Yes! We're learning so much about each other right now. And that's why I included this question on my list.
Starting point is 00:40:00 This just feels bad, man. This feels like we're picking on Mark the episode. No, no, you're smart. I didn't craft it this way, but it's just the inverse of what we usually do to you. Isn't it great being on this side? No, it feels bad on this side too. So I'm going to do like a blind Coke test. It's going to be like, which one of the distracted people has the worst hair, is the dumbest, and is as stubborn as a mule?
Starting point is 00:40:23 I'm going to keep pulling up like Mark tabs, and then I'm you're like the numbers around them where they're like gonna rip off the wall and it's just all mark mark mark really is all things to all people what can i say but i'm curious about this one because i don't think i know the answer to this for either of you necessarily. And there's no way that this one can become personal and hurtful. Like, I'm so sure about this. Who is more likely to cry during a sad movie? Three, two, one, do it.
Starting point is 00:40:59 Oh, really? Everyone thinks they're the sensitive type, do they? Can I give a little anecdote about a recent event i don't want to spoil anything go ahead have you guys watched the last of us show uh not all of it but the first four or five episodes i think there is an episode of the last of us that was so incredibly out of the blue and touching that i broke down like six or seven times during it and then i guess channeling mark's masochism i went and i watched react videos so that i could cry watching other people cry as they witnessed that for the first time so you you wanted to cry i guess there are definitely times have you guys ever do that where you like want to cry so you go and like you look
Starting point is 00:41:41 for something either really happy or really sad to make yourself cry i do that thematically i if i see something that affects me on something that's very personal like attaches to one of my personal fears or whatever i will watch more content that's like that but i also feel kind of conflicted about that because i don't like doing that with like real things watching other people's actual real life like tragedies or whatever for my own emotional gratification always makes me feel really dirty because i do get upset but that using that in that way for me is it's like watching their life as like my my emotion porn is weird yeah but i do that with fictional stuff sure uh i will just as my argument tell a story that I think you guys know about is one day I was taking a shower and I imagined a scenario where there was someone who was a flat earther and he was sent up in a
Starting point is 00:42:34 rocket to see the curvature of the earth and it was like he was like I was wrong I was wrong and I just imagined that in my head and I just started bawling just because I'm like it's so beautiful he learned and he was like remorseful there was a tiktok I saw the other day of like and it was probably a rip of a different video but it's like it was this prank where like someone is pretending to be blind and like licking an ice cream cone he wasn't pretending obvious at first and this other guy came up and like shoved him and just like then he busted out like he was canyons like trying to swing it back and then the guy thinks he's blind and then just like the sheer remorse like on his face after he went away just like i watched it like dozens of times just because he's so sorry he's so sad i don't know so we're both cry babies
Starting point is 00:43:22 i don't know like you had to watch this scene i imagined a flat earther going to space well the question i think was specifically about movies yeah i'm saying like i didn't even need a movie no any sad movie god i that's your they have to be sad it'd be really happy moments too like uh yeah military people reuniting with like their kids or loved ones like when they surprise them at like sporting events or like in hallways, school, whatever. You know what? You know what gets me? What always gets me on social media?
Starting point is 00:43:52 I'm a sucker for pet rescues. Where it starts, it's like a dog living at the side of the road. It is like a broken leg. And you're like, oh, God. Jeez. And then the end is like and i took him home and he's been happy since that day and we live together and he loves me and i love him and oh it's so sweet and if i watch one of those that will get me in the mood where i'm like
Starting point is 00:44:17 oh i want a happy tears i want more happy tears yeah no yeah oh well we're all just a bunch of big cry babies then i guess i guess none of us is a man by traditional standards but by then don't cry i don't know mark but not allowed not part of what a man does sorry there's a quote that's probably better for the other podcast you're on mark but are you aware of uh jim valvano you know he was a basketball coach have you heard of the v foundation there's a if you watch espn in all seriousness there's commercials every year i think it was for cancer he had cancer um and so every year espn does a thing where they raise money for his foundation but he had a quote that he read um one of his last like public appearances like he was getting an award and he said if you laugh you think and you cry that's a full day that's a heck of a day you do that seven days
Starting point is 00:45:01 a week you're gonna have something special i remember hearing that when i was young and i think i was going through like a tougher time it might be around the time like my dad or someone had passed away and i remember like hearing that and like that was going on i was like that's stupid and then like you know later on it was like actually kind of makes sense so yeah days where i like get to laugh at something or if i watch those react videos that stupid episode of last of us recently you know figure something out i think about things like yeah it feels like a pretty good day i think those are pretty good words to live by that's jim valvana v foundation i guess shout out to v foundation because most important well you both did a terrible job of helping me decide who gets points give it to mark give him the point
Starting point is 00:45:39 or give him crybaby status wouldn't that be both if mark is the crybaby status. Wouldn't that be both? If Mark is the crybaby... Oh, wait, you picked yourselves. That's right. Oh, that's very generous of you, Wyd. It's not worth any points this time, though. Just one point for Mark. Thank God. If either of you can cry on cue, though,
Starting point is 00:45:55 I'll give you a point. I can barely breathe on cue, man. Give me a fucking break today. Oh, you're doing it? No, I can't do it right now damn it's really hard it's really hard to cry i have expected that to go from staring to just like bawling face it is hard like it's a skill some people are just able to like cry on command i have to like in the times that i've done it for scenes now, like as, as acting, um, it's really fucking hard.
Starting point is 00:46:26 Uh, the only way that I can do it is just like really, really getting in the moment. And I think that's how a lot of people are in like embracing the sadness. So unless there's something like sad, uh, that I can have some time to get in that headspace, like absolutely sure I could, but in, in 30 seconds, I don't think I could. I mean, that would be very impressive. Cause I do feel like that's probably a, maybe not for everyone everyone but for some people that must be very hard to cultivate like acting skills there's a lot of methods like to it and some of i don't touch um there's a lot of methods for like like that people teach in acting of trying to like get in touch with your emotions by channeling past
Starting point is 00:47:05 trauma and i'm like that's unhealthy and it was put to me in a very good way someone put in good words it's like it's disrespectful to your past to use it in a way some people don't believe that some people believe that by using their trauma and channeling in that way they're kind of getting control over it and that's fine i don't like doing that so i like to just like be in the scene for that but the number of times that i've had to cry in a scene on camera now is only three the rest is with a tear stick because when you're shooting the same scene for eight hours a day uh turns out it's that's the hard part you can't stay sad and actually crying for a full work day what's wrong with you yeah no i didn't realize that was
Starting point is 00:47:46 a part of it until for eight hours and i had to be like and just be like over and over and over and over and over and over again wait that's uh censor that holy shit what am i talking about will cut that out when you hear in a scene eight hours and you just go over and over and over many different angles have you watched like the behind the scenes like again last of us stuff whenever they were filming the game and they had uh troy baker and the girl who played uh sarah his daughter joel's daughter rather uh if you're watching them do like the motion capture spoilers for last of us where sarah gets shot and she's like like freaking out like dying and everything and joel's like freaking out over her and crying and stuff and they both start like bawling it shows them do
Starting point is 00:48:29 the motion capture for that and like they voice act it out but like after they're done it looks like for like an amount of time after doing the scene they're still just like not okay yeah like the channeling stuff like it's pretty wild to actually watch if you think about it's the same it's the same exact thing as like when you're watching that movie or you're watching a tiktok as far as i'm concerned with acting is like you you get there because you can empathize with the moment you can feel it and when you are doing a scene where it is all you need to do is like if the scene is written properly it is sad and it calls for that emotion during that time or at least it can nudge towards that because it's just fucking
Starting point is 00:49:10 sad and so when you just like live that everyone does that every day acting is not like that complicated it is difficult but it's just like that's that that is what it is i think in in normal circumstances i would agree like if you're like wearing your costume you know you're full the other person you're looking at looks the same but in the motion capture stuff i mean they've got like that's got the bands like the dots on their faces and then they're like bawling over each other where they look like so silly like you just want to be like looking at the way they're you know outlined for the motion that's kind of my favorite part of a lot of the marvel movies is when you when you see like behind the scenes stuff and it's a it's one of those shots where it's like a big fight right it's a big ensemble thing
Starting point is 00:49:50 all the heroes are around and in the movie it's like iron man's flying and the hulk is put and this stuff and then like thanos appears or whatever like it's not a real scene but you know all this stuff is happening but then in the behind the scenes it's like well but robert downey jr wasn't there that's cgi like the the hulk is actually you know mark ruffalo with like a big thing costume and like a thing going up off his head yeah and all this you look at it in real life and you're like how do you how do you do an emotional performance in front of a blue screen the size of a building with guys with tennis balls on sticks who are like this is these are the hulk's arms okay so we're going to interact with the ball the ball and the stick and these guys are like you know emotional death scenes and whatever all this crazy stuff
Starting point is 00:50:36 that happens in marvel it all looks fucking insane in real life how do you do that that seems like you're saying that seems so hard compared to acting where everyone's in costume you're in a scene you're in a place that's at least quasi realistic compared to that uh have i ever told you about that video that i did with uh the rock and lily sing there's a video of me no wait how am i not i knew you did something with lily at some point i didn't know you did something with the rock this was like a separate thing it was like the rock was like doing youtube or something and making a big snafu about it and so he had like was giving a getting a tour of like youtube creators and they were going in each of these rooms so in the video you see lily sing open a door and rock walks in it's like
Starting point is 00:51:17 this is a market blower so i i'm told that this is gonna happen so like oh cool that's awesome i'll get to meet the rock this This will be. Oh, no. So I get in a room and, you know, they're having me do this thing. And I have like a cat and there's like the meow thing or whatever. And they're like, I'm like, okay, when are they going to get here? And then they bring in two C stands with a tennis ball on top of each. One very tall and one shorter. And they put it in there. And then they take two pieces of paper and some tape and they go.
Starting point is 00:51:44 shorter and they put it in there and then they take two pieces of paper and some tape and they go and they stick a picture of the rocks on the taller one and a little thing on the bottom one i'm like they're not here could they not make it it's like no they're not coming in and i'm like oh that was my first experience with that situation that's such a bummer man i know it's so disappointing there's an at&t commercial that came out i think last year or so and uh it showed um the at&t girl i forget her name in like lebron and they're having like a conversation about like phones and this and that but you never literally see their faces in frame like looking at each other at the same time
Starting point is 00:52:28 it's always like the back of his head and her face or just her hair and like him looking and talking and it feels very much like the same thing happened like they couldn't get them both in the same place to film and they tried to play it off but i was like i'm on to your tricks you didn't even try you didn't even try like You put him in the frame and just like, you know, steady. You could have done something. You didn't even try. I was very upset. So for you, Mark, did someone did like a, I don't know, production assistant or someone read for you?
Starting point is 00:52:56 So you're supposed to be talking to Lilly Singh and The Rock and some person off camera is just like, hi, it's me, Dwayne The Rock Johnson. I'm just touring YouTube and it's nice toane the rock johnson i'm just touring youtube and it's nice to meet you markiplier yes 100 that is exactly how it goes so did you shake his hand or anything just like pass by no i held up a cat to him nice to meet you can i find this uh i've never seen that i can't believe i didn't know that existed. Anyway, so it's there. Yeah, it's called the YouTube Factory featuring Dwayne The Rock Johnson, Lilly Singh, and more. Turns out I'm the and more. I can't wait to see how much content Dwayne The Rock Johnson has put on YouTube in the
Starting point is 00:53:36 Oh, never mind. Four weeks ago, Heart of Disruption, Project Rock. Don't know what that is. Then five months ago, Black Adam trailer. Five months ago, Workout with Aaron. I mean, it's not actually that bad. No, considering how busy he is, I guess that's not so bad. But then it goes eight months.
Starting point is 00:53:54 And eight months ago, apparently, he was really on this shit for a minute. It's like a few times a year. And I'm like, okay, that's fair. It's totally fair. Well, you know what? Point to Mark. Because that is such a good anecdote that I forget what we were talking about before that. Yes!
Starting point is 00:54:10 I don't remember the question, so that's fine. Was the question there... Oh, yeah, who's more likely to cry during a sad movie? Okay, great. Unrelated. You earned those points, Mark. Thank you. All right.
Starting point is 00:54:27 How are we doing on time here? Oh, coming to the end. You know, I also didn't get to meet The Rock. Why don't I get a point? Because your story's not funny. Your story's common, Wade. How common? Okay.
Starting point is 00:54:38 I have a funny one that I'd like to do quickly, and then the last one I'd like to end on, because it's another one I'm curious to learn more about you as people. Okay. But the funny one is, who farts more in bed but either while sleeping or not sleeping roll hold them up ready go i can't i i want to say wade i wanted to say mark but i don't know your farting habits that's the thing You don't know each other's farting habits? And you call yourselves co-hosts? Well, we're not married yet, so we haven't shared the same bed.
Starting point is 00:55:10 I mean, we've been on the same tour bus, but it's never really been a horrible issue. Yeah, we've slept, some of us, like a rock on a tour bus together. Was it you who slept through when the police stopped us, Mark? Yeah, I did. Literally, we got pulled over and everyone on the bus woke up except you and then the next morning you woke up and we're like what police i don't remember that he also apparently it was you that lost your pants right mark and you had to run and get them and no one noticed oh yeah didn't your pants like slide to the back of the bus or something because they fell out of your bunk and then slid around oh probably yeah
Starting point is 00:55:44 i remember that happening i think yeah because i can't sleep with pants on so i gotta take them off they just yeah the monster would get you so you gotta be ready to get those boxers off we learned that last time tell on yourself how much do you fart in bed describe it as much as accurately as you desire i mean it comes it changes you know from time to time depending on like do you fart every night in bed like every time you sleep you fart probably i wouldn't say that but in my sleep i don't know yeah i have no idea i don't feel like i fart a lot i'll give it i have an argument i have an argument i'm actually gonna i'm gonna change it up i'm like i can't change it up but wade is uh larger than me therefore he probably would statistically produce more natural gas
Starting point is 00:56:26 than I would, and therefore, if there was anything to go on, it would be he would fart more, but he voted for himself. Wait, stop. Mark, you're right. Mark was a strong argument, and Wade takes the point for farts. I forgot how the game was played.
Starting point is 00:56:41 No! I guess with X amount of farts i win it doesn't matter how many farts all you know is with more farts you've won x is greater than y in your equation all right fart man and with many farts comes great responsibility better hair better farts just got you get it all not fair wade really does have everything even covid thank you i've won the lottery today all right this one i find uh interesting there might be an absolute dud but i'm gambling for the finisher i want to know between the two of you who takes the longest to order a meal at a restaurant and let's assume it's not a place where you go and you have a set order this is not cracker barrel where mark
Starting point is 00:57:32 you already know what you're gonna get before you're in there this is like a restaurant where it's like oh guys we were visiting me thanks for coming to town i know this great place it's a it's a type of food that everyone likes there will be something for you but it's a restaurant you've never been to let's go and have a dinner together who between you takes longer to order at a restaurant hold them up in three two one show me damn it i feel like there have been many times where we're at dinner together and I'm just going like, can you make me go last? You go first. Or I'm flipping because I'm doing some stupid diet and I'm just like, I can only eat two pieces of lettuce if they're on the left side of a stem of broccoli. The stem!
Starting point is 00:58:16 Only the stem! You know, I feel like I... Or a cracker barrel. You order your stuff, but it all has to be on the side. That's a long order, but he orders immediately. The but it all has to be on the side that's a long order but he orders immediately the the length it takes to communicate is not the same if like if we're going to focus a shower and even play like of course we're ordering at the same speed but you know if it's a restaurant that we don't usually go to i think just like recently you fool you don't order
Starting point is 00:58:38 there they just bring the meat that's what i mean it's like it's the equivalent for cracker barrel but if it's like when we just went to b's, it's like I remember distinctly going last. I'm going to defeat you by complimenting you. Ready? I don't eat as much of a variety of things as Mark, so I know where to go to the menu and what I'm looking for pretty quickly. Even if it's a place I'm not familiar with,
Starting point is 00:58:59 I know what I like and I don't usually venture too far from it. Whereas Mark, I think, is more willing to try new things so he actually reads through the menu and takes time to figure out what sounds good or what he might want that particular day. Whereas if I'm at a steakhouse, I have a pretty good idea of what I want. If I'm at like an Italian restaurant or an Indian restaurant, I already kind of know
Starting point is 00:59:16 what I'm getting. And I don't venture from what I know. I'm not an adventurous person. So therefore it's easier and faster for me because I'm very kind of simple. i've got a much bigger appetite than you guys give me credit for as far as the things i'll eat but it's still pretty simple compared to the probably to yours and especially i think march i think you wrapped it up perfectly there i agree good thing i voted for you too buddy no there's nothing else i can do
Starting point is 00:59:41 we're all in agreement which means that both of you get one point. And unfortunately, that means that it's tied. Can I tell you an ordering story? Because this is another thing. Yes. Restaurant ordering story. Emergency playoff. Wait, get ready.
Starting point is 00:59:57 With my doing like no carb only meat, I've discovered a new way to embarrass Amy. And that's ordering no bun meals at drive-thrus but in doing so i have discovered some pretty incredible things that you can get that are really nutritious way overpriced but uh useful for those who want to do uh best lettuce wraps uh on the go readily available wendy's uh but also five guys does bomb lettuce wraps uh if you have a hop dotty near you that is the best lettuce wrap um you can order mcdonald's patties buy the patty with just cheese and bacon it is cheaper than getting the burgers because it's like a buck 25 per patty you can get about a pound of beef for under five dollars and then uh the best breakfast is uh chick-fil-a because
Starting point is 01:00:45 you get like a chicken breast egg whites and a slice of cheese on top and it's unbelievably delicious however mcdonald's breakfast with no bun is very good um but the first time that i went up and ordered uh it took me five minutes and they didn't understand what i wanted and i was extremely embarrassed dude okay i do this car i'm i'm not particularly dieting and i'm not good at diets but carbs um i because i am diabetic carbs are still a thing i have to manage carefully no bun options in the age of like doordash uh grubhub type stuff is absolute banging absolutely awesome because you don't have to try to explain to a normal human who eats a hamburger why you don't want a bun and what that means and that you can in fact order single patties
Starting point is 01:01:30 from mcdonald's because sometimes the employees don't even know that but you can order anything you want on the app on your phone and they generally give it to you because it's so specific and weird no bun ordering is not weird mark it's cool it's the wave of the future it is it is lovely and i honestly i kind of enjoy them more in a lettuce wrap now i got buns and i like buns my least favorite part of most burger places including fast food is the bun and the fries i feel like those are the things that can let you down most consistently but the the burger and or chicken patty or whatever plus the toppings that go on it that you get always pretty good unless you're in certain restaurants which i would not go to
Starting point is 01:02:10 anyway but like always pretty good you're not gonna get shitty fries or a bun that's stale or whatever no bun ordering is the wave of the future i love that story i will counter with this though one of the best things i ever had steak and shake burger which is kind of shocking but they had this thing called the 3d grilled cheese what where they took their their their burger buns and they flipped them inside out and they treated the buns like they were making a grilled cheese sandwich so it had like the the butter and the toasted butter bun on the top and the bottom and then like the burger meat and the cheese inside that's a five guys grilled cheese sandwich wait the cheese is on the outside you can get that at five guys no no the cheese was still on the inside with the burger but it was like a grilled cheese like the flat of the exterior
Starting point is 01:02:51 so it toasts like bread yeah right got it okay so instead of the rounded part being up it was like a normal bread i guess yeah well they have bread at steak and shake i get why five guys does that because you can order that i did not know and i know where i'm going when i get my taste buds back but five guys doesn't have bread right they have buns they burger buns and hot dog buns they can shake has bread they serve like sandwiches they use the burger i think they use burger buns for now it's been a while and it didn't last for i think i only got it twice and they got rid of it which i was very sad steak and shake is pretty good because they have patty melts for you people, the grilled cheese bun is the way to go. You know, this is where I'm like stunned, Wade,
Starting point is 01:03:28 because you know you can cook this stuff at home if you want it. But then it's not Steak and Shake or Five Guys Burger. That's a home burger. That's true. That's true. I know we have this at home, but you understand what the problem with that is. But the thing is, like, all these burger burger the way they prepare their booger boogers never mind
Starting point is 01:03:56 wait what was your point i was just gonna say the way that all the individual restaurants do their things is available online. But whatever, it don't matter. There is, I will say, though, something about a homemade burger that just like if you like make the bacon and the burger and stuff like I do want to try a grilled cheeseburger like homemade burger at this time. Good anecdotes, everybody. Thank you for the lightning round playoff at the end there. the lightning round playoff at the end there and I think we can all agree and I think it's probably
Starting point is 01:04:26 pretty obvious at this point that the point and the victory for the entire episode for one word goes to Mark that's a point for boogers oh yeah baby
Starting point is 01:04:40 I was beaten by boogers I lost the hair round. You're damn right you did. I may have also really enjoyed Mark coming out about no bun ordering and the adventurous possibilities of ordering individual patties with stuff from restaurants and fast food chains and whatnot. But boogers is what put it over the edge. I'll take it.
Starting point is 01:05:01 The losing streak is over. Do you want to continue your winner's speech, Mark? I feel like you're really feeling it right now. Oh, man, I've never really... I've never felt like, yes, I've won for a while, because it's been pretty regular that I've been able to get it back. There's been very few times that I've gone through a streak this long, but it's like, yes, I've done it!
Starting point is 01:05:18 Everyone's rooting for me in the subreddit. Everyone's like, he's making his comeback! I'm going to get 15 wins in a row, and I'm going to really get my place in a row and i'm gonna i'm gonna really get my my place back up there i'm gonna get it guys i'm gonna get it guys i guess you could get 15 wins in a row by declaring yourself the winner every time i will say mark i know you had 15 deducted there's been rumblings in the subreddit of people being like well weren't they gonna give those back do we get to give those back does someone get to give those back
Starting point is 01:05:41 they could give mark's wins back to him so while i'm host wait do you have a loser speech thank you bob for a fun game i thought that was really really fun and imaginative way i didn't know about the shoe game so that was fun it was nice and easy to do with uh covid and it's nice to know i've got better hair uh i'm less stubborn i'm less messy. Even though you lost the game, you won some big battles. Even though I didn't win the game, I feel like I won the war. And I'm okay with that.
Starting point is 01:06:12 That's a very thoughtful and sincere loser speech. Very weird. And anyway, like I was saying before I interrupted myself, Mark, since I'm the host, I'm going to give you back your 15 deducted wins! Yes! I don't know if that means a single thing to anyone other than the five people in the subreddit wait who took them away i think you
Starting point is 01:06:31 did oh so you're giving them back like counterfeit wins because i got the real ones in a bag in my house who is host it's about hosts as an office as a seat of authority in the land of distractible the host is the host there is no person and so the host that's why you were able to take those away you had absolute autonomy and authority as the host to do as you saw fit just like i have absolute autonomy and authority i do think we should avoid uh willy-nilly giving and taking wins away maybe there should be some sort of wait period after we've done this but when you are a host in the future it's within your rights i am i am not curbing that in any meaningful way but i am reinstating marks deducted 15 wins so for everyone on the subreddit who's so into this there you go you're welcome put that on the spreadsheet and smoke it wait i'm not i i didn't mean to though i do want an asterisk on it in the
Starting point is 01:07:26 subreddit because uh he who took it didn't give it you can make that declaration when yeah when you're home oh that's true when you wield the power i'm coming for that seat baby can't we can't let wade win he's gonna get drunk don't worry i fix it every time okay good i'm already drunk with power how do you think i've become more palpatine like it was covid no it was winning the dentist to me do it just like palpatine i've even got the robe starting to grow starting to grow is it growing out of you out of your body i didn't buy this it just started growing on me one day maybe you need a shower man no you need to end this episode so i can go be dirty do it thank you so much for listening and watching if you're cool
Starting point is 01:08:12 and if you didn't watch it's because you didn't go to spotify because you can only get the video podcast on spotify obviously so make sure you check that out maybe you should do that and see our I was going to say beautiful but that's not fair see our faces check out our merch at thor.distractablepodcast.com Mark is Markiplier on the internet Wade is Minion777 and or LordMinion777 on the internet I am MySkirm
Starting point is 01:08:40 as always you can just google Mark's friend Bob much easier to spell and that's how you find all of our stuff thank you for listening make sure you follow us on Spotify and you can see our non-beautiful faces that's it for this episode congratulations to Mark he will be hosting next week
Starting point is 01:08:56 and until then podcast out

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