Two In The Think Tank - 150 - Wild Conspiracy Theories
Episode Date: September 5, 2018To celebrate out 150th episode we decided to write three "mini" reports, each on a wild conspiracy theory. Recorded live at the Giant Dwarf Theatre in Sydney, this episode was so much fun. Keep readin...g for a list of conspiracies we talk about, or listen now and go in not knowing...Conspiracies covered on this episode include: Denver Aiport, Saddam Hussein's Stargate, Flat Earthers, Australia does not exist, Michael & La Toya Jackson and The poisoning of Russian spy Alexander Litvinenko.Melbourne LIVE show on October 13th : https://www.moshtix.com.au/v2/event/do-go-on-live/105917?&skin=4406&ref=hwlrUK shows : https://dogoonpod.com/events/Support the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: www.patreon.com/DoGoOnPodSubmit a topic idea directly to the hat: http://bit.ly/DoGoOnHat Twitter: @DoGoOnPodInstagram: @DoGoOnPodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod/Email us: dogoonpod@gmail.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hey everybody, Jess and Dave, just jumping in really quickly at the top here to make sure
that you are across all the details for our upcoming Christmas show.
That's right, we are doing a live show in Melbourne Saturday December the 2nd, 2023, our
final podcast of the year, our Christmas special.
It's downstairs at Morris House, which usually be called the European beer cafe.
On Saturday December the 2nd, 2023 at 4.30pm, come along, come one, come all, and get tickets at dogoonpod.com.
This episode is brought to you by Progressive.
Most of you aren't just listening right now.
You're driving, cleaning, and even exercising.
But what if you could be saving money
by switching to Progressive?
Drivers who save by switching save nearly $750
on average, and auto customers qualify for an average of 7 discounts.
Multitask right now, quote today at progressive.com. Progressive casualty and trans company
and affiliates, national average 12 month savings of $744 by new customer surveyed who saved
with progressive between June 2022 and May 2023. Potential savings will vary, discounts
not available in all safe and situations.
Are you working way too hard for way too little?
There's never been a better time to consider a career in IT.
You could enjoy a recession-resistant career
and a rewarding field with plenty of growth opportunities
and often flexible work environments.
Go to mycomputercareer.edu and take the free career
evaluation.
You could start your new career in months, not years. Take classes online or on campus Visit PlanetBroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. Hello and welcome to an intro to another episode of Do Go On. Dave here with Jess and Matt
Hey Dave. Hey Dave.
Oh hey Dave.
And we're very excited to announce that this episode that you're about to listen to was
recorded live at the Sydney Opera House where we performed. They had to open the roof
because there were so many people there.
They were all the people.
Yeah, that was you.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Because there were so many people there.
I mean, I mean, they used the roof as an emergency exit.
There were over 600,000 people in there
and I don't know if anyone got out.
Oh, so they kind of went on top of each other.
No, we got out and then we closed the roof again
and said everyone for themselves. Yeah, thank goodness. So you're going to hear a top of each other. No, we got out and then we closed the roof again, said everyone for themselves.
Yeah, thank goodness.
So you're good to hear a lot of mayhem.
A lot of screaming, but I think there's a bit of comedy in there somewhere.
Maybe, I don't know, maybe somebody there was funny.
No, but it is alive.
It is alive, so we recorded very recently at the Giant Dwarf Theatre,
which is a fantastic venue.
It was our biggest show yet and people came and sold it out,
and it blew our minds and we were very happy.
And it is colloquially known as the Opera House of Redfern.
Yes.
Yes.
I heard that a lot.
Yeah.
People asked me for directions, and I meant,
do you mean to the Opera House of Redfern?
And they'd go, duh!
Obviously I do.
Yeah.
I'm not an idiot.
Yeah.
I'm not an idiot.
Is there anything we need to explain
any sort of visual things, Dave?
There was some very vocal audience members, but I do hope the microphones have picked them
up for you and I'll edit it to make sure it makes sense to you at home.
And yeah.
But the audience were having a great time and if you want to experience that good time
in the flesh, we are coming to the UK.
All the shows are now sold out except for one Birmingham show.
But we're also doing a Bon Voyage show in Melbourne at Howl at coming up in October 13th.
Saturday afternoon, so if you want to come along and you want to be a vocal audience member,
please come along, don't be vocal.
I just booked in the book.
Don't go in your laughter.
I've just talked into the management howl about the timings and there's a solid hour
after the show that we're going to be able to hang out, to chat to people and whatever,
so that should be real fun.
We love to chat.
Oh, we live to chat.
Yeah.
I think you meant to say.
And we chat to live.
It's our job.
Ha ha.
That's right, but it was a lot of fun,
and we'd like to thank everyone that came along.
So without any further delay, here is our episode live the giant wolf theater the upper house of red
Please enjoy
Yes, thank you, Matt. I look to you. You needed to sign off on this signing off
There it is. Hello. Good evening ladies ladies and gentlemen welcome to another episode of Do
a Go On, my name is Dave Warnecke how you doing?
Oh man that is so so cool, I really hope you've kept some energy to welcome to the stage
my two beautiful co-hosts, match Jordan just purgans like gentlemen
Hello everybody how you up hi That was real good that felt so good
I'm like I'll leave this to Jess she's got it and was not wrong
And last to sit down thank you
As the best! Normally we're on shitty barstalls
Now I feel like we're on shitty barstalls.
Now I feel like we're doing a Q&A.
Yeah, the reason I made this film was because I just felt underrepresented in media.
Mmm.
Mmm.
Jess, Jess, let me do the feminism around here, please.
I'll fill this one. Um, what Jess was trying to say. Jess, Jess, let me do the feminism around here, please.
I'll fill this one.
What Jess was trying to say.
I'll be the feminist here if I can say that.
Does anyone have any cues?
We have a lot of ideas, all right.
A lot of us.
Thank you so much for coming out to this beautiful venue of giant dwarf.
Give it up for giant dwarf ladies and gentlemen.
Look at this button.
Hello. We just made eye contact. I thought I needed to acknowledge it.
Hey Dave, remember when we met those guys just before?
Yeah. And we scared the shit out of them.
It's got scared again because he was on his phone. Oh, he's talking about it.
So we're walking out the street.
Marnier on business.
Come to a traffic light.
We're waiting to cross.
These three lovely young gentlemen of Stendi there.
One of the guys tends around and goes,
Huh!
Which I get a lot, to be honest.
Mostly because I stand far too close to people.
And I touch the buttons.
Yeah, that may have been why he was reacting like that.
Sorry.
Sorry.
That's not with me.
Oh, we've got it early.
It's all right.
Everything's going to be fine.
It kind of feels like we're padding.
We have a plan to do this.
Usually we do a report, but nah.
Hey, Dave, do that be where you're asked people have to have been here before.
I'll do that.
Okay, Dave.
Alright, I'll follow.
Do that bit.
Alright, I'll follow the script.
Well, Jeremy, give us a big round of applause if you've ever heard our show, Do Go One, before!
Thank you, thank you.
Now, I got from that that a lot of you have, and I also got that you and you have heard
it the most.
The reaction was amazing, thank you so much.
Give me a big round of applause, seriously big, if you've never heard do-go-one in your
lives.
Amazing.
Nothing to celebrate, mate.
Nothing to celebrate, mate. Nothing to celebrate.
You were, honestly, it was a small percentage,
but you were Keener as a whole.
To let us know.
Dave, look at the positive.
He's got the whole back catalog in his feature.
Yeah.
Because ladies and gentlemen, I'm pleased to tell you that this is
episode 150.
Woo!
That's it.
This feels like Oprah. Like, they're too willing to clap. 150
This feels like Oprah like they're too willing to clap
You get a car you get a car
He fucking idiots it's it's that easy and Oprah never gave anyone cars either
It's just a Yeah, she just said it a lot. Yeah.
She got a lot of people's hopes up.
And I was like, oh my god.
I mean, working eight jobs.
And then they left waiting for their keys.
And then I just got ushered out of the building.
Sorry.
Oh, really ruining the Oprah magic there.
Anyway, let's do that.
If you haven't heard the show before, Matt,
would you like to tell them what the show is all about?
OK.
I did tell you I was going to have that prepared.
Yes.
And as you were asking me, I remember, I did not.
We have had a bit.
All right.
I'll remember, though.
I've done it 149 times,
as a person, you two bloody blow-ins.
I, um, yeah, that's right, we haven't been able to do it.
Yeah, I've got one on my fucking level.
Get on my level, dogs.
Alright, um.
Ha ha ha.
Don't hide the regret face, don't save that for me.
Don't fool to back here, Look, little bit of regret.
I forget Sydney crowds are sensitive.
They don't like to be called dogs.
That'll be a nice frothy, bro.
Yeah, frothy dogs.
You frothy dogs.
Anyway, this show, The White Works, is there's three of us.
And you guys probably figure that bit out.
And then what happens is, from there,
I mean, that's just the beginning. From there
we take it in turns between the three of us to do a report on a topic. Between the three
of us? We take it in turns between the three, what, I mean you know what I mean, surely.
And then I'm just question about that. No, don't come on. Hilarity and shoes. Oh, a lust control that word.
Um.
But tonight, it's a bit different, right?
Dave, you want to explain what is happening tonight?
Now, usually, one of the three of us does the report.
But tonight, I love that you had a theory.
I knew it.
I knew that we're going to do something different.
Oh, what's the theory?
What's your theory?
Like the 27 club, where we all do a mini report,
that's what we're doing tonight.
Record.
Great theory.
You're going to have to tone this down.
I can't handle this level of enthusiasm.
Thank you.
Too far, I'm very sensitive. Mate, I've got your money. You've got money?
When did money come to this? No. No. God knows. Right theory. And what I love about that
theory is that that actually relates to this topic. Wait, what does that mean?
The three of us tonight are all doing a mini report on one of our favorite conspiracy theory.
To be honest, my immediate, my, the conspiracy theory going through my mind right now It feels a bit like you're all paid actors. That's my conspiracy theory
What I think we're now gonna do two reports
Our two favorite conspiracy theories. I didn't know it was meant to be our favorite. I never heard of this until this week
Is that what it was meant to be?
All right, we're doing a report on a conspiracy theory. We all looked up today. Okay, that's that's the truth of it.
So Jesse see this topic was actually suggested by a couple of our Patreon supporters include the first one was
Justin Robinson said we said we want to do a mini topic, what's a good broad theme.
He said crazy conspiracy theories and then he commented a few minutes later saying,
all conspiracies that may not be so crazy after all.
So I enjoyed.
And I also enjoyed, Alice DeMegrainga said, conspiracy theories I've been hoping for for
ages.
How about a silly theory each?
Or if time is an issue, Jess and Matt do the
shorter silly theories, and Dave does a bigger one. How to not take that person?
Yeah, I don't appreciate that. And I'm very happy to tell you that that is exactly what
has happened. Once again, I've written an entire report. What? What? No, don't love that.
No, you're here for the silly ones.
I love that.
Yeah, we're silly.
Oh, no.
Now I've fucked it, and I haven't, hang on.
Pad for a sec.
Right.
I mean, you could have done this when you pretended to walk out earlier.
I didn't realise I'd fucked up until now, so pad for a sec.
Right.
Technology's not on my side. I'm just trying to help Matt get, and I'm just trying to get
the report on my iPad, so it's easier for him.
I'll start it because I got on my phone and then.
Great.
Alright, and then I'll just sit here quietly for a bit. Looking panicked.
You can enjoy that visual while listening to that dulcet tone.
Great.
Yeah, one tone.
One tone.
One tone.
And it is the same.
No.
That is not true.
All right. So one thing we also do, if you haven't heard the show before is we used to do a question
to get on to top of our-
Oh yeah great, sure.
I believe Matt has one.
Um, absolutely.
Oh yeah, I mean it's not my best.
I was going to say these are the two, so I was picking between three.
Do you want any of the ones I didn't pick?
Either way, I'll let you know. Either way. Either way, I wasn't. I mean I was picking between three. Do you want any of the ones I didn't pick? Either way, I'll let you know.
Yeah, I'll let you know.
Either way, I wasn't. I mean, I was being polite, but I was going to tell them either way.
Yeah, go ahead.
One of them sounds like a lot of fun. Saddam, who's saying, has a stargate,
which means you can travel anywhere in the universe.
And yet he chose to travel into that hole in the desert.
Yeah, he took, yeah.
And that's what the Iraq Wars are all about, apparently.
That could have imagined how good my topic is.
If I didn't pick that.
Is that number three? That's a third one.
That was the second best one I was going to pick.
Hitler is still alive under Antarctica.
At under. Under. I-under.
Under.
Uh-huh, yep.
Is that somehow stark?
I could relate it or what's going on there.
Thank you.
Got to assume.
How else do you get under?
You know?
Yeah, I'm not wrong.
I decided not to do the Hitler one,
because my self-control was in that good.
Since Dave started that rule, I appreciated the H word Hitler and I, my eyes hit the deck.
I avoided all the rights.
Anyway, the... Thanks so much, man.
The topic that I ended up choosing was suggested by Holly in Yorkshire, and this is what...
Yeah.
Any Holly from Yorkshire fans in the night?
Ah!
Kabbalah, there's always a few.
Always a few.
And this is what she said.
This was her bit of sizzle said it's a creepy mystery with a giant horse
A giant Mongolian horse you wish yeah, no, and this is the question probably
Don't know why gave away part of the answer before the question, but you know, we're fucking trying to stop out tonight, all right?
Is the answer giant horse?
All right, I won't bother asking the question.
I'm just kidding.
Now the question is, and if these guys,
I know it may be someone in the audience may,
the question is, which international airport
is wrapped up in multiple wild conspiracy theories?
Horse airport.
Oh.
I thought I was onto a winner there.
Oh, damn.
I was very confident.
Denver.
Denver.
Denver.
Denver is correct.
That person in the darkness.
Well done.
Denver.
Yeah.
All right. I mean, I was going to say none of us saw that coming because you did.
I didn't.
Denver.
No, I'm just like, I'm just excited for them to see the things that they miss when they just listen to the podcast and it's you just going.
It's amazing.
And it's good stuff, yeah.
You're welcome.
That was a lot of denier-o-face, doesn't it?
But you can see, I mean, just off the headings, you can see why I picked the sexiest one.
Saddam Hussein, Stargate, Hitler, Under Antarctica, Denver, airport.
Yeah, I went for the Hollywood answer but fuck it was fun. Hopefully Jesus
alright. Oh my god no pressure. Here are some real exciting facts. The Denver
International Airport was built in the 90s, so to be so specific. And it was officially
opened in 1995. Very good, you're sure. Some question whether or not it even
needed to be built though. As Denver already had an airport.
Oh!
Oh! Does anyone get tingles?
The new one had less runways and no technological advancements.
What are they doing?
That sounds like a sweet upgrade.
It sounds like a cover for something.
Yeah, some sort of conspiracy?
Don't get ahead of me.
Who told you?
The main difference was the area.
The airport itself is 35,000 acres.
What's on 35,000 acres?
Nearly twice as large as the next biggest US airport.
So it's huge.
Some would say suspiciously so.
Can you make this bigger? No you're just old.
Well I'm both the true. I actually don't know how. Well that makes you
feel. Alright, alright. Your glasses are sitting right there. There for
seeing over there. Well we could hold your report up the back.
You could have a go. Thank you. Is that too much to ask?
Oh my god, we should get auto cues.
And headset mics.
And then we just take turns doing TED talks.
Fuck yeah.
All right.
Can I borrow the company credit card, please?
No reason.
Don't look into it.
Why do they need to, sorry to cut you off there, but it was...
Why do they need to build the airport on such a large chunk of land, question mark?
Hmm, posing big questions early.
I was going to make a bit of a theory, but I think I've nailed it and I don't want to ruin it.
You probably have to say this.
I have or haven't.
It's a big horse.
Um.
They need a, I mean, having a horse, 35,000 acres.
That's a big horse.
That's a huge horse.
So they're not using most of the space, right?
Well, not above the ground anyway.
Oh, tingles, tingles. Horse people's a good guess. If that is what you're
doing unless I just heard a bit of a conversation you were having about
tomorrow but anyway what do you have to do tomorrow? Horse people you? Right okay
but what if I told you? What if I told you below the ground is a massive
underground military bunker? Oh! That's one of the theories, alright. There's different
thoughts to what the bunker could be used for. There's no hard evidence of it. But there are many, many, there are many curious things worth considering.
Firstly, the build went billions of dollars over budget and it took around 16 months longer than scheduled to complete.
How long does it take to build a bunker?
16 months, exactly.
And it cost billions of dollars at a bunch of. Seems to know an awful lot about bunkers over there, don't you?
Hang on!
No, I didn't consider that. Hitler did have a bunker.
Which is not relevant to what we're talking about now.
No.
Or anyone on this stage as far as we know.
I'm in a lot of trouble later and so is whoever that voice was.
A construction worker, a construction worker who worked on the airport has claimed that
the reason the airport ran so over Shedgel and Budget is because of multiple buildings that were built underneath the airport
as well as a complex network of tunnels. Multiple buildings underneath it's weird, right?
What sort of buildings would you like to go to bank?
Yeah.
Go to gym?
Yep. You got a door.
It's a little bit of fun, they construct it.
All right, you can serve that bit up yourselves.
Two Melbourne, I guess.
Well, you take that, they definitely didn't,
I only have that, you got a door, you got a two-bed.
I meant deconstructing stuff, it was like a...
Yeah.
Fuck, I mean, it doesn't matter, because obviously it was very good
and no one got it, but... No one got it, it was so good mean it doesn't matter because obviously it was very good and no one got it but
No one got it. It was so good. It wasn't they all collectively went fuck and shut up, Matt You piece of shit you're a loser and no one wants you here hurry up finish your reports and we get to daves
It's not like anyone was saying that it's not
Some say that these tunnels were just built for the train system, but that sounds like
a huge cover-up to me. I mean, is there an underground train system?
Yeah, sure, but maybe, I don't know, fuck, I don't know, but potentially, and the internet
is so big and the information is so large.
And I'm but one man.
So there's different thoughts on what it could be used for.
Some think it's going to be used as a base for the ruling elite.
Some think it will be used as a shelter for VIPs when the world turns the shit.
In Denver.
Denver.
Not in Denver under Denver. Denver. Not in Denver under Denver.
Oh, okay.
And others think it might be used as some sort of concentration camp, and those are people
take over.
So,
These are people.
Oh, you look like you know a lot about the lizard people, sir.
Do you see his huge tongue?
Oh.
Wait, what did you say?
Your maths do it. Do you want to come to the next paragraph?
Oh fuck yeah, that'd be fun
Obviously, I'll need to see some ID
Hello
That's you
Thank you Well
Adding to the mystery of it all is that apparently no one really knows who funded the works
But there is a foundation stone at the terminal which states that it was funded
by the New World Airport Commission. The conspiracy theory buffs out. There will...
What? Is this him? Is this him or is this me?
Yeah, I think it's time to take back.
His mic technique was better than the real Matt Stewart's. Well done, let's do it.
Let's do it. Now, now, be honest, our Matt Stewart audience Matt, was that his error? Or have you just typed a lot of bullshit? I thought he was doing really well.
Yeah, it was doing great.
But what have you done here, mate?
The New World Order, yeah, sure.
So that was, oh, yeah, that broke. Yeah, right.
So the foundation stone, the mat was chatting about,
but I'll take it from here.
It said that it was funded by the New World Airport Commission
and the conspiracy theory boss out there will know
that this, yeah, that is no good.
You see what I have to deal with you Matt my own words
Yeah, so the new world order you guys familiar with the new world order. Oh, yeah, it's one of the big
It's one of the big ones and that says yeah, I kept a Nash
Carman the other guy that's a WWF 90s wrestling reference.
For the six, six or seven people that got it, you're welcome.
Well, it's basically a small group of people secretly running the world, trying to move
the world towards a single global government.
That's the new world order, apparently.
And this airport was funded by the new world airport
commission.
Oh, that's too similar.
But here's the thing, the new world airport commission
doesn't actually exist.
Much like the new world order.
Officially apparently, the airport says, oh no, it's not the New World Airport Commission,
it's the New Dash World Airport Commission, which also doesn't seem to exist, but that
is something they would bloody say, isn't it?
Those fucking airport dogs.
Airport dogs.
Oh, sick sitcom idea.
It's a dog airport.
Little doggy customs, you kidding?
I mean, they do, they kind of exist.
What's that?
Stiffer dogs.
Huh.
This is very disappointing.
Thought I'd come up with a very clever sitcom.
I mean, can you still be a sitcom?
No, no, you ruined it. Sorry.
You ruined my hopes and dreams.
There's a dedication stone in the airport.
I may have already mentioned that.
I'm doing it again.
And it features the Freemasons logo,
which people feel there's some people think there's a connection between the Freemasons and the New World Order.
The Freemasons are a bona fide secret society whose history dates back hundreds of years,
and their membership has included many rich and famous people including Hollywood entertainers,
businessmen, and US presidents, like Gerald Ford.
Just to name one.
And my grandfather.
I'm part of the new old...
Hitler was in the Freemason?
You!
You are so fucked, Lader!
And you two are staying together! You are so fucked later.
And you two are staying together.
And we're staying at an Airbnb together.
And guess who's sleeping on the fold out couch?
It's me currently.
But it's no longer me currently.
Worth it.
I believe Dave, the Freemasons are also
who the Simpsons were basing
the stone cutters on as that parody.
So that is true.
Yeah, this is a Simpsons reference out of the way.
Like in the stone cutters in the freemasins,
members are ranked with a number
with 33 being the highest level.
Jess, what do you feel about that?
Oh, 33.
Look, two more or three less. I don't like 35.
35? That was Robert Harvey's number. Thank you. Anyway, Jewel brand-known metalists, Jewel.
Yeah.
It's a lot.
The Denver airport was dedicated on March the 19th, 1994.
I'm sure not dedicated.
They do like a ceremony with the mayor or whatever.
Oh, cute.
Big red ribbon.
Yeah, some like that.
Not a big scissors.
And the stone has the free makes and symbol on it, right?
Now, if you add up the numbers from that date,
oh, yes.
Yes.
19, 1994, 1, 9, 1, 9, 9, 4, you get 33, which is also the number of the thing I just said.
If you go back that far, it's also the age that Jesus Christ was when he died.
So I'm starting to think this goes all the way to the top.
Did you write that?
No, no, I'd riff that there.
You riff that?
Thank you. there. I'm the riff-keying everyone, is that baby? Stop calling me baby.
I do you think that was to you. That was a general baby? Yeah, I was talking to that man over there.
I'm really sorry he winked at you, I'm really sorry. I won't get an apology from me.
Due to the Freemasons long and secretive history many believed that they are part of the
New World Order Conspiracy.
Another thought is the bunker has been set up to be a Nazi-style concentration camp.
Any thoughts on that, Jess?
Concentration camp's bad.
Yes, thank you.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, you're a little less clap happy now, I notice.
One of the key bits of evidence for this
is that from above, the runways look very similar
to a swastika.
I imagine if that is not planned,
and then you get the aerial view.
You just have to get the architect in and you're like,
Jeff, what the fuck?
And you know how they often have a picture hang on their wall
of the aerial view, like when they first built it,
and then they have to hang it and they
just every day like fuck. No no no I salute it every day. Yes that's on tape. I said they
salute it. You and your people. You're sleeping on the street tonight. So I'd call that obviously that's an interesting choice aesthetically.
Others call it an obvious sign that the airport has been built by Nazis.
There's widely Nazis.
Always build an airport.
The official word from the airport is that it has been designed this way so that all
runways can be used simultaneously no matter the weather conditions.
The airport spokesman said, we think the shape looks more like a pinwheel.
And when I actually, when I read that, I looked at it again and I agreed, it does look like
a pinwheel.
A schwa stick a style pinwheel.
Fennazes.
Cool, all right.
That's the Joker road in there.
There's also another weird thing, and this is what it gets a lot of people's attention,
the murals.
There's some wild murals there.
So wild they've had to be taken down.
I've big weird murals are on display at the airport.
And a lot of conspiracy theorists see these as being an obvious sign that something sars is up, right?
In particular, there is a pair of dip titters, which is, does that mean twos?
Yeah, it should have looked that up.
I love that about it.
Is dip two?
There's enough of you confidently saying yes, so yes.
Dip titch. two. And there's enough of you confidently saying yes. Yes, yes. Stip-tip.
If you lost your place now, don't be a pad. Dada da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da Alright, go. The paintings were by artist Leo Tanguma and featured a pretty full-on imagery.
One shows a Nazi looking soldier wearing a gas mask.
Oh, for fuck's sake.
Wearing a saying, one fetus, a giant swastika.
He's wielding a massive sword and a big machine gun.
It's a full, it's so full on.
The first one was the one.
But it's like, he's got a gas mask on, so you can't see, but I assume he's biting his
lip like that, yeah.
Rainbow Star.
Around him, it shows children dying and grieving mothers.
At the Denver Airport.
It's so weird.
That is, that's hard.
Another mural depicts children from around the world
handing weapons wrapped in their national flags
to a little German boy who is hammering them out of shape.
Little German boy is wearing like leaderhosen.
And there's like an American scout boy
with gums wrapped up in the flag and he's handing him in.
What?
Yep. At the Denver Airport. At the Denver Airport.
At the Denver Airport.
That's stupid.
In one of the murals, there is a letter written in the bottom corner from a child who died
at Auschwitz.
Fuck, no.
At Denver Airport.
It's real weird, real weird.
Probably not surprising, this full-on imagery, I've said that too many times, has captured
the imagination of conspiracy theorists, linking them to the apocalypse, fascism, and other forms
of evil.
Fascism.
Oh, oh, fascism.
You got to go to Paris.
It's the fascism capital.
That's funny.
I should write that out.
It could be a bit.
Someone reminded me that later.
Just listen to this.
Never.
You cannot, there's nothing you could do to make me want to listen to that.
Denver Airport Media Relations Chief, Heath Montgomery,
has responded to some of these conspiracy theories.
Good name.
How's it good name?
It's our first good name.
Hello, I'm Heath Montgomery.
I got nothing else on Heath.
I mean, that was enough.
It was quite enough, mate.
He responded to these conspiracy theory claims about the murals, so weird that he had to,
but anyway he did, and he was interviewed by Thrillis.com, which is fun.
Montgomery pointed to a plaque, they were there at the airport, and he goes, I mean, look
at, could you read this plaque to the journalist.
And the plaque says, this is a powerful mural
expressing the artist's desire to abolish violence
in society.
Nobody ever looks at the artist statement,
said, Montgomery.
He's like, fair, I was like, what are they reading?
The description.
It says no war.
We want peace.
Why there's a big Nazi with a sword.
It's art, man!
He said, the conspiracy people will look at these and say, it's showing fire and destruction
and the new world order and the collapse of society and civilization.
It's such a stretch to make.
Montgomery's great.
Well done, him.
I'm not sure if he's had a good look at him.
He doesn't feel like he's
He's really given him a look up from the from the explanation
There's a Nazi on there and there's an ash Fitz letter. What the fuck my saying ash Fitz right there?
saying Ash Fitzroddough. Oh, come on, come on.
No, just because he's got German heritage, that's all.
Oh my God, German heritage.
Hitler was of course Austrian, so you're in the cleave.
Although he did live in Germany for all.
Something I have never done.
Why, I'm not even drinking, I don't know why. I do, yeah.
The art apparently went through a rigorous selection process.
I wrote vigorous and luckily Google Docs put a little red line under that because I was sure that was a word.
That took me too long to figure out it wasn't quite right.
I still think it is to be honest.
It's fine.
Google, what the fuck does Google know?
Yeah, so I went through a rigorous selection process before being chosen, so it's weird
that no one flagged any issues with it.
So is there a list of things that they rejected?
No.
How hard you have to go for them to Denver to be like,
well, not in Denver.
No, not in Denver.
This is going in Denver, airport.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
So the mayor and everyone checked it off, right?
And people go, well, then so it's obviously that's fine,
but what if the mayor's involved?
Oh.
That's my conspiracy theory.
I've got nothing to back that up. The murals aren't the only freaky thing of the airport. Oh Jesus is going on longer than I expected almost at the end
Let's get to that bloody horse
The big finishes the horse here, all right the murals aren't the only freaky out of the airport
There's also a big 32-foot tall statue of a horse outside the airport called Mustang
32 feet. Yeah, that sounds pretty big. Yeah, yeah, pretty big. Well, I mean if you think of a foot long sub
And I do
Times that by 32. Wow, that's a big
Yeah, you couldn't get through that in a day
I remember this horse body could.
So it's 32 feet tall and it's...
It's 80 its own length in sandwiches.
I couldn't eat five foot longs.
Maybe over a day.
They're up.
Yeah, don't limit yourself.
So Mustang is bright blue and its eyes glow red.
Oh, what?
Which is particularly terrifying at night, apparently.
So much.
I just heard a yucky over here.
Would I agree with?
It's been nicknamed Blucifer.
LAUGHTER
That's very good. Conspiracy theorists speculate that the statue represents the fourth horsemen of the apocalypse,
aka death.
It's really lighthearted airport.
But this is pretty apt at this, if this horse does represent death, because BluCyfer
has literally killed a man. What do you mean? What do you mean?
The status artist, Louis Himmenez, was killed by the statue. Killed by his own statue
before he had completed working on it. A piece of the statue fell on him, severing an artery in his leg. And he bled out.
That horse has blood on his hoofs. Was he trying to write the artist's description
as he was dying? This is a peace horse. This was meant to be a piece horse. And they still put it
up. Yeah, out of, out of respect. I think Satan himself. So there's so many different
bits and pieces. There's more than this. I've picked out the bloody best ones, I reckon.
But then the guy, the journalist who was writing that article for the Thrillerlist.com,
Colin St. John, another great name.
He got it.
Colin St. John.
Oh, very good.
Oh, yeah.
Got a love of St. John.
So he got in touch with the man responsible for designing the structure of the airport
itself.
Kurt Fentress.
And asked him, as aress, and asked him,
this is a quote, he asked him bluntly,
if there are any underground tunnels
or secret bomb shelters.
No one is thought to ask.
Up until this point.
Because Fentress replied,
well, I really can't speak to it.
I'm sworn to secrecy.
Oh.
Oh.
So John went on to say, he goes, he either has a sense of humor as dry as the Denver air,
which is, did you know the Denver air was dry?
Is the dry?
No, just nobody goes to Denver air porn.
He said, oh, he's not kidding, even a little bit.
So he believes it could be true.
And I've been thinking about this a lot.
I'd love to hear what you guys think, but if it were like, why would you, if it's a Nazi thing, don't design a big
swastika on the top, you're giving it away sort of.
Well, the Nazis have been known to be subtle, so you're right.
I mean, they probably thought they'd never be found out. I mean, at what stage are people
high above an airport? I mean they
thought they'd get away with it. Yeah, that is a good point. But sadly people looked
out the window. Apparently there is when they set it all up there's a time capsule that's
been buried under that plaque and it'll it's due to come be dug up at the end of the century and, uh, Ventress says there's a few answers in there.
Oh, it says, it says, keep digging.
Yeah.
He said, he apparently designs and stuff like that.
I mean, certainly, some John reckons there's something in it and he's like, you know,
he thinks it's quite likely there's something down there.
He doesn't think it's anything to do with the new world order or anything, but probably
some sort of a big thing
in case of emergencies.
Beef jerky, that sort of stuff.
All right, so that's basically my report,
but I did, I was fascinated by how cool the number thing was,
right?
They added up the numbers and that proved it.
33 was the number, right?
So I've done a quick number thing here myself.
I've linked up every letter of the alphabet to a number,
A is one, B is two, C is et cetera.
All right.
C is three letters.
And I've done a little experiment.
I did this in the air today.
Phil Collins style.
Um.
Look, that got away from me. It was just,
I was signing up before I realized that I apologize.
Um, but I did this, I did this little experiment.
And I've done this. I've linked up the letters.
Did everyone get me?
A is one.
Dave D4A1, V22E5.
That means Dave equals 32, right?
The second, not a Nazi.
Possibly the second highest Freemason.
So.
OK, exactly. That's what I thought at first, I'm like second highest
Freemason, or is there more to uncover? Okay. James, you go through the same
process, 48. Warniki. Something else, okay, I don't know if anyone else has
noticed this. First three letters of Warniki.
War. What does it mean? I don't know, I don't know.
What does it mean?
What is it good for?
Warnecke equals 77.
Dame's.
Dame's.
Dame's.
Dame's.
Dame's.
Dame's.
Warnecke equals 157.
The first phrase I checked to see how much it equaled.
I just saw it.
Also equals 157.
The very first phrase I checked also equals 157.
What do you mean the very first phrase?
Explain that quickly.
What do you mean?
The first one I was going to, I was going to, I'll try it.
I did a bunch of different things out.
I'm going to frame them up today.
The first one I tried equals the exact same as your name, Dave James Wanuki.
And that phrase was, lizard person.
A luminary confirmed. Oh my god!
I mean, all I need to say about that is...
I didn't mean to add you here tonight, but...
Look, I want to believe believe and I now do believe
Couldn't believe the very first fuck
The Uber driver had no idea why I was so excited
Well, he does now though. He's here tonight
He promised I'm not sure in the Denver Airport later gentlemen Oh, be promised, be promised.
I'm not showing the Denver Airport later gentlemen.
That is illuminating is what that is.
Illuminati.
Illuminati.
Yeah, that was the last one.
No, it's not.
Once you're on a roll.
It is hard to stop.
It is hard to stop.
It's the momentum.
You know who else found that?
No, no, no, let's hear him out.
Who else?
No, no good.
Yes. I was thinking Robert Harvey running down the wing
1997 kicking that beautiful goal. All right. Matt, you want to
I'm gonna take over from here. Okay, my turn um
And I as always
And I, as always, decently wrote a question. And I have it here now, and I'm going to read it.
Off the page in front.
I'm here.
Here we go.
Read that.
And you're second now.
Read in my question.
Okay.
Well, my question is to you end to the audience
What shape is the earth
Oblong's fun, I'm gonna say oblong
Incorrect the world is obviously flat.
You mean the shape known as flat?
Yes.
Wow. I mean, my mind is being blown.
Wow, the flat shape.
It's a flat shape.
Obviously, you would have studied that in primary school.
Oblong flat shape. Yeah. You know, that in primary school. Oblone flat shape.
Yeah, you know, I'm play school that go through the square window, the triangle window, the flat window.
You just run into the window.
I think there's something I find interesting. Nearly every window is flat.
Illuminati confirmed!
So on it!
I love that that is obviously the key word.
She was so on it though, like I was like there will be a delay if she gets to it.
Nailed it! Yes! Okay great!
Great job, yeah. Yeah, so obviously a lot of you have heard of flat earthes,
people who believe that the world is flat.
And I think the more you hear it, the more you think
they need help.
Gen, genuine question, any in tonight.
Not after what I just said.
I think they're, who we got one living now? question any in tonight. Not after what I just said. Any?
I think they're, who we got one leaving now?
Just getting a drink, just getting a drink.
Just an alcoholic, it's fine.
Please.
Jet, Jet definitely isn't trying to flat shame.
So.
No, I don't know.
I would never flat shame.
I'm not here to shame anyone.
I'm just here to educate.
And. Carefully don't fall off the edge. It's around, all right. I would never flat shame, I'm not here to shame anyone, I'm just here to educate. And...
Carefully don't fall off the edge.
Carefully don't fall off the edge.
It's a serious thing I don't understand.
Anyway, so in very simplistic terms, flat-earth is believed that the earth is flat.
So slow down.
Everyone come the fuck down.
So that belief is not a conspiracy in itself.
That's just a belief, right?
Wait, hang on.
Did you just say all-blown again?
Because that could be true or it could be flat and all-blown.
Is that right?
What does all- Oblong mean?
Maybe I should think, doesn't it? New theory. New theory.
Oblong Earth.
Oblong.
We're Oblong Earths.
Ooh, I like that.
It's fun to say. Oblong.
I like how it feels in my mouth.
Oblong. I'll belong.
Just tell me more about this.
Flat.
Thank you.
So I mean this has kind of started quite a long time ago. Very long time ago, in fact, in early Egyptian years.
Oh, the early Egyptian years.
Yeah, you know.
The world was always portrayed as a disc floating in the ocean,
floppy disc.
Several ancient Greek philosophers believed
that the world was flat.
Uh...
Can't trust them.
You got any issue with the Greeks?
Yeah, a couple.
The ancient ones?
Yeah.
Yeah, ancient ones.
Oh, okay.
There was one, uh, one,
Ancient Greek philosophy,
we thought the earth floated in water like a log.
Which I don't really get.
Like an oblong shaped log?
Yeah, it was like a little oblong just floating along in infinite water.
Um, that's cool.
But, but it's been argued that that philosophy still believed it was round.
Just like a little ball in the lake.
Again, it makes no sense.
Um, had he ever seen a log?
Wow.
That is a great question.
Very philosophical.
Have you ever seen a log?
But Dave, what is a log?
I think that's all he can say.
I think that's all that can say. I think that's all he can say.
I think that's all he can say.
I think that's all he can say.
I think that's all he can say.
I think that's all he can say.
I think that's all he can say.
I think that's all he can say.
I think that's all he can say.
I think that's all he can say.
I think that's all he can say.
I think that's all he can say. I think that's all he the prevailing belief was that the earth was flat and square
while the heavens were round.
I don't fully understand.
That is a great image.
Where a little square up there round, which makes sense.
And the model of an egg was often used by Chinese astronomers to describe the heavens
as spherical when the egg is in a sphere.
So they kind of fucked that, didn't they?
Didn't say what kind of egg could have been like one of their round eggs.
It's true.
Good point.
I always give the Chinese.
What was it?
What kind of Chinese were they?
Astronomers. Astronomers. I always give the Chinese astronomers the benefit of the day.
What kind of Chinese? Look at it in sound great. Sure, it didn't sound great. But I just meant,
I just wanted to say the full thing you said, because if I left it, I always find that give the Chinese a benefit of it.
That would have sounded bad.
Admittedly, the pause did not come at a good time.
Do you remember when we started and they would clap at everything?
And now they're like, oh, we've set aside our Friday night
to watch three fuckheads.
You have, yes.
Sorry.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. We deserve that. So the first person or the first culprit who, culprit, thought that the, or hypothesized that the world was
in fact a sphere, was Pythagoras. Same duty came up with my favorite theorem.
I'm bad at maths. Which one? But I was actually really good at Pythagoras's theory. Strangely
enough. Is that the M equals M C U M? Sure. A squared plus B squared. I love that one too. It's a good one isn't it?
E equals MC Hammer. Love that dog. Love that.
So...
Did you and me, Matt Stewart's wife?
Oh!
Yeah. Doesn't actually matter which match Stuart you marry
Technically, it's all of them
Imagine that
I'm very confusing there's lots of Jess Perkins's
How do you come into this between? Sorry.
Pythagoras in the sixth century BC stated
that the earth is spherical, and this view
is spread rapidly in the Greek world,
just in the Greek world.
And so this kind of became like the norm after that.
But then we come to a more modern time in the early 1800s your time man
Warm to get man
I'm Santa Wormtie Githman. A couple of characters in.
You man, where you at?
Yo man!
Woo!
That yo man, what the fuck?
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Yo man, who'll come to you later?
No, you're place, yo man!
Come on, we want you, man.
Are you still there?
Yeah!
Love it, I love it, I love it.
I also love like it's a full body thing for you.
You!
I'm sure he's doing that exactly.
And I apologize to Yo-Man.
Your time will come.
Same bloke.
He's very confused.
I don't doubt it.
Same bloke. Same bloke. He's very confused. Don't doubt it. Same bloke.
Multiple personalities.
So modern flat earth hypothesis originated with the English writer Samuel Robotham.
Robotham.
Robotham.
Robotham.
Ooh, like that a lot.
It was based on conclusions derived from the Bedford level experiment. which was that basically when somebody stood at one end of a lake
of a river, sorry, with a telescope and watched their friend sail away and
because they could still see them for a bit, they're like no curve. On a lake.
A river. On a river. Telescope boat. I didn't see it just cursed mate, so
I hadn't thought about that. What do you have an answer?
Always oblong.
I'm gonna go.
Oblong life.
So Robothon published a pamphlet called Zetetic Astronomy and he later expanded it into a book.
The book's title was Earth not a globe
And it wasn't even like Earth colon not a globe. It's just Earth not a globe
Which I love
People only read four words at a time before switching off. Earth not a globe.
I thought a globe.
Oh, I'll pick this up.
Earth is not a board.
Ooh.
Y'all.
I'll never know what Earth isn't.
Earth not a globe.
Which is great.
And in Earth not a globe, he proposed that the Earth is a flat disk centered at the North
Pole, which I think guess then doesn't really make it North.
The middle pole.
Yeah, that's not going to go center.
We're so different.
So North Pole is in the middle and around the edge is just a wall of ice.
And Antarctica is just all the way around.
Just keep it a scene.
So I said Game of Thrones.
Does that mean anything?
It's a show, man.
Are you seeing things you'd rather be watching?
I swallowed no.
Yes.
No.
Haven't seen it.
Yes, help us out.
Are you okay?
Oh, Bob!
It's too out of anything.
It's real crap, help.
So, North Pals in the middle.
Santa Paul.
Great, a lot.
I talked to him all the way around.
After I bought him's death, a woman called Lady Elizabeth Blount.
Blount.
Blount.
Blount.
So pretty.
So beautiful.
She established a universal, zetetic society, whose objective was the propagation of knowledge
related to natural cosm...
Blount.
Blount. Blount. Basically, the society published a magazine,
which was called the Earth Not A Globe Review.
Again, I didn't think to revise that.
I mean, did the title...
Did a lot of globin brackets sick or something?
Did we like, this is an out title.
This is his title.
Earth Not A Globe Review.
I love it.
And that remained, like, that the magazine was active well into the early 20th century.
And there was also a flat earth journal called Earth, a monthly magazine of sense and science.
Still flat.
Soon in next month.
It was published for a few years from 1901 to04 and it was edited by lady blount. Oh lady blount
It's yuck
Any blounts in
Does everyone want to have a go on three everyone say blount one two three?
Yeah, it's gross isn't it?
That doesn't feel good blount. Anyway I bet oblong guy does yelled oblong
Yeah, I just said it
Calling response
Love it love it
But you ride up the back in front of the lamp there. Yeah, it's you. Absolutely background. You can't say anything. You're yelling into the
void.
Yelling into the void. The Dave Warnocky story.
So true. So true.
So there's a couple of different publications going.
In 1956, a guy called Samuel Shenton
created the International Flat Earth Research Society,
running it from his home in Dover, in England.
He kind of designed it as a successor
to the Universal Zotetic Society.
But given his interest in alternative science and technology,
he had less of a religious view than the last one.
The Universal's at the Tethic Society was, yeah, had some religious swings.
Anyway, when satellite images showed Earth as a sphere, Shenton remarked, it's easy
to see how a photograph like that could fool the untrained eye.
But he's been training his eye and his own lounge room for many years.
50 of those
six sets of 50
Everyday
Strongest arts
Later he was asked about similar photographs taken by astronauts who were in space.
Right, right.
Sure he's got a great answer here.
And he attributed the curvature of the world to the use of wide angle lenses adding,
it's a deception of the public and it just isn't right.
He's got a really good fisheye all the time.
Yeah, I love that.
So this kind of leads in nicely into flat earthes and NASA.
So they believe that NASA, along with the world's governments,
are all covering up the fact that Earth is actually just
a disk hanging suspended in space.
How long?
But then there hasn't really
been any astronauts come out and say, that's true.
It's a big disc you've been lied to.
But the Flat Earth Society explains
that space agencies of the world are
involved in a conspiracy, faking space travel and exploration,
something that they say began in the Cold War space race.
As it turns out, they say the US and Soviet Union had to keep outfaking each other.
But it says, nowadays, the conspiracy is most likely motivated by greed rather than political gains,
and using only some of their funding to continue to fake space travels saves a lot of money to in bezel for themselves.
Oh, that's smart. More money in our pockets. Yeah, I like that. Are you an asset?
Yeah, I work for NASA. Whoa. You knew that was my day job. Sorry. By day, I'm an astronaut.
By night, I'm a podcaster. And I say, babies.
What?
Yeah, I'm like a very specific superhero.
I only save babies.
Hell, hell, one fire.
Sorry, how old are you?
Two.
Fuck off.
Call Superman, I don't hear a shit.
Not my problem.
That's what I say.
Two-year-olds. You's what I say. Two year olds.
You're a real hero.
Yeah.
So, it's maternal instinct.
Kick it on in.
I'm going to speed through these last bits so I can keep drinking and we can get to Dave.
So, in the most popular flat earth model, the outer edge of the earth, like I mentioned before,
which is ice, which is a big ring of ice, it's bound to bone, it's called the ice wall,
again, very creative. The traditional view is that the ice wall rises approximately 150 feet
above sea level. It's even bigger than that horse. Yeah, so think of like a foot long. Tell me how
many horses. I only only know in blucophers. Do you think if they're both measured in
feet, do you think they're somehow related? No. I reckon fe's a pretty standard unit of measurement. But it's weird though, isn't it?
Fate. Think about it. Fate. We've all got him.
I wish I remembered what the cue for the X-Files theme was.
Illuminati?
Illuminati confirmed.
Yes, you are so good. You weren't going to give it to me I'm going to have to confirm. I'm going to have to confirm. I'm going to have to confirm. I'm going to have to confirm.
I'm going to have to confirm.
I'm going to have to confirm.
I'm going to have to confirm.
I'm going to have to confirm.
I'm going to have to confirm.
I'm going to have to confirm.
I'm going to have to confirm.
I'm going to have to confirm.
I'm going to have to confirm.
I'm going to have to confirm.
I'm going to have to confirm.
I'm going to have to confirm.
I'm going to have to confirm.
I'm going to have to confirm.
I'm going to confirm.
I'm going to confirm.
I'm going to confirm.
I'm going to confirm.
I'm going to confirm.
I'm going to confirm. I'm going to confirm. I'm going to confirm. I'm going to confirm. I'm going to confirm. I'm going to confirm. So yeah, the ice wall is 150 feet, obviously, to make sure the ocean doesn't spill out.
Of course!
And what did they think was the outside, it's just in the space, you see?
Wow, that's cool.
I can't wish that was it.
Yeah.
That'd be fun.
Yeah.
Imagine.
That'd be pretty fun.
But you can't just go and hang out at the ice wall because they also believe that the ice wall is of course guarded by nasser employees
To prevent people from climbing or falling off the edge of the earth. So you can't just wander on up and have a look. They won't let you
Jump into space
Stop right now. Nanny stayed. Am I right?
Let me jump into space. Stop right now. Nanny stayed. Am I right? Let me jump into space if I want to.
The man, you know.
I'm not OK.
Others believe that the ice fall to be much, much larger.
Some say that it is estimated to be between 40 and 50,000 feet high, which is,
I mean, even if you wanted to climb to the top of that, fuck that, you know? How high is
Everest? Like, 20,000 feet? 22,000 feet or something? So it's bigger than that. It's double
9 Everest. Double Everest, fuck that. I'm not doing that Everest twice.
I've already done it.
Once is enough.
Once is enough.
We've always said that.
We did it once.
Yeah.
Now I'm bored.
Never again.
But see, I was just imagining like a solid wall of ice.
Is that what you were picturing?
No, not anymore.
OK.
Beat.
Beat.
Picture in one of those ones where it's like in the middle
that's fissures in there.
Cute! Frozen fish though.
No.
Oh.
No.
Fiss-fingers.
I wish I had this in the middle.
I wish I had this in the middle.
I wish I had this in the middle.
I wish I had this in the middle.
I wish I had this in the middle.
I wish I had this in the middle.
I wish I had this in the middle.
I wish I had this in the middle.
I wish I had this in the middle.
I wish I had this in the middle.
I wish I had this in the middle.
I wish I had this in the middle. I wish I had this in the middle. I wish I had this in the middle. I wish I had this in the middle. I wish I had this in the middle. It's very confusing. In some ways it's not confusing at all.
Wow.
That is beautiful.
So what should we be imagining when we're thinking about it?
Yeah, so I was imagining just like solid like a wall of ice.
Like hanging throne?
Is what I felt when I read ice wall.
Yeah, yeah.
Have you heard of Game of Thrones?
Yeah. Oh no shit,. All right. Cool.
It exists.
Illuminati confirmed.
The minishing returns.
Apparently it's more like a it's a naturally formed structure more like a mountain range. Just like a snowy mountain range.
Oh, that's great. Just ends with a mountain range. Just like a snowy mountain range. Oh, that's great.
Just ends with a mountain range.
I like that.
No, no, that's cute.
A mountain range.
Yeah, that's cool.
It clarifies, this is from the Flat Earth Society's website.
It says, it is a wall only in the sense
that it walls the Earth's oceans.
Yeah, that'd be a fucking idiot.
Yeah.
It's not like Truman Show kind of kind of, all, you know?
Oh, and they also say so, another thing that Flat Earth Society
do have a bit of an issue with is gravity.
It's an illusion.
Objects don't accelerate downwards.
No, no, no, no, the earth is constantly moving up.
What, like an elevator? Yeah, the earth is constantly moving up. What, like an elevator?
Yeah, we're just always going up.
I mean, we're going up right now.
That's good news.
Yeah, this disc is just constantly moving
at upwards at 32 feet per second,
driven by a mysterious force called Dark Energy.
Giant Joys, well, we're booing dark energy. driven by a mysterious force called Dark Energy. Hmm, giant joys well.
We're booing Dark Energy.
Because it's keeping us alive.
In the Flat Earth Universe,
gravitation not gravity exists in other celestial bodies.
So gravitational pull of stars, for example,
causes tidal effects on Earth.
So stars have gravity, right?
We don't.
We have gravitas.
gravitas.
So here's a few FAQs from the Flat Earth Society's website.
These are really fun.
First question is, if the world was really flat,
what would happen if you jump off the disk's edge? A fantastic question.
Yeah, what's the answer?
The answer is, in general, you would become directly affected by dark energy as the earth
is, creating the illusion that you are standing next to the earth.
What, forever?
Yep. I'm not sure what you're standing on
Dark energy that's what you're standing on so you just you're just there and I imagine like a lot of people would try it too
So eventually there just be a bunch of people
Just standing next to the world. Hey, how long you been out for?
You like you know, you know those shell pools
I imagine they'll just standing next to one of those
because you could still see the earth.
Just try to be a just standing next to it.
Just like, oh, that was silly.
Which I...
Can I get back up?
No, all right.
I can't.
I'll just stand here then.
Do you stay there until you start to death?
Maybe.
But maybe once you're outside of the earth,
hunger's no longer a thing. That's how we solve world hunger get everyone off the earth
Yep
Stop the earth I want to get off
Is that a thing yeah, that's a
Second vague Simpson's reference. Thank you stop the planet of the apes my
Simpson's reference. Thank you. Stop the planet of the apes. My favorite answer though is to this question, how is it that the earth does not have any gravitational pull but stars and the moon do?
And the answer is this argument is a non-sequitur. You might as well ask, how is it that snakes do not have legs
but dogs and cats do? Next question. Apple's an orange is dickhead. Snakes are not dogs
or cats. Yeah, he's not a star or a moon. I love that they had to clarify their point.
Yeah, that's their answer. A couple of very quick things as a filmmaker and flat-earther called Rob Skiba
He held a talk called testing the globe where he revealed why NASA and the governments of the world are so keen to
Preparate the myth that is the earth is round
He says the room motivation behind this is that they want to hide God from us
Where's he hiding?
Well, that's the thing we don't know.
So, there's a quote from me,
he says, the bigger picture many of us have come to believe
is hiding God.
To me, that would be the ultimate motivation.
So, they think NASA is more powerful than God?
No, they think NASA has found God,
and they don't want anybody else to find Him. And now God's just like, alright. No, God, yeah. He's sitting in a room somewhere.
Yeah, he's shy. They've trapped him in a cupboard.
So, for those at home, just in case the mics didn't pick that up,
So for those at home just in case the mics didn't pick that up, someone just yelled Denver Airport and there was a big chance 35,000 acres of pure bunk ridge.
That's about a god's sight. Yeah, he'd be brammed in but he could be there.
You're like, I can't wait till they're reckoning.. Want to pop my head out.
For the delicious home, Matt is impersonating God.
Sure.
Good say that about me, anybody day.
But I was.
No.
Okay, and just one last thing.
A lot of you may have seen on social media at times, quite recently, a resurfacing of a theory
that first floated it around 2006.
And that is that Australia does not exist.
I'm so sorry to be the one to tell you.
Wow.
We're not real.
So a woman wrote this on a forum and she did later say that it was a joke, but 50,000
people jumped on the bandwagon.
Not as a joke.
So she originally wrote, Australia does not exist.
All the things you call proof are actually well-fabricated lies and documents made by the
leading governments of the world.
You're Australian friends?
They're all actors and computer-generated personas.
Part of the plot to trick the world.
You.
A lot of people jumping on that bandwagon as well and claiming that the
governments, all of them, made Australia up.
Ah, I mean Australia, I'll say if Australia exists, non-primities in their years, like that's
going to happen. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
So I'm a girl.
So I'm a girl.
So I'm a girl.
And now you all do.
I just want to find the rest of it here.
So these are just some of the other things that people have jumped on there.
They've said, I'm sure you have even talked to people on the internet who claim to be
from Australia.
I have.
But that's the thing. It's also talking about like, you've probably spoken to people on the internet who claim to be from Australia. I have. But that's the thing.
It's also talking about, like, you've probably
spoken to people on the internet because none of them
leave their house.
They're really secret government agents who are surfing
the internet to enforce these false beliefs.
And this is my favorite part.
We're not entirely sure why the government made up
an imaginary continent.
Oh, why it's trying to convince the world the continent is real.
But we can tell you that we know for a fact that Australia doesn't really exist.
And then it says, please join us in our quest to convince the world of the truth.
And then I just looked over your shoulder. there's a picture of Osama bin Laden.
Yeah, yeah.
So that's confusing.
Well, what are way for everyone to find out here tonight as well?
But I wanted everyone to find out in a safe space, you know?
And that we're here for you,
and afterwards we will be holding some counselling sessions
if anybody needs to discuss the fact that you're fake.
We are here for you, but that is my report on the Earth Conspiracy Day.
Just look at it!
This episode is brought to you by Progressive.
Most of you aren't just listening right now.
You're driving, cleaning, and even exercising.
But what if you could be saving money
by switching to Progressive?
Drivers who save by switching save nearly $750
on average, and auto customers qualify
for an average of seven discounts.
Multitask right now, quote today at progressive.com.
Progressive casualty and trans company and affiliates, National Average 12 Month Savings of $744 by
New Customer Surveyed who saved with Progressive between June 2022 and May 2023.
Potential Savings will vary. Discount is not available in all safe and
situations. Are you working way too hard for way too little? There's never been a
better time to consider a career in IT. You could enjoy a recession-resistant
career in a rewarding field with plenty of
growth opportunities and often flexible work environments. Go to mycomputercareer.edu and
take the free career evaluation. You could start your new career in months, not years. Take
classes online or on campus, and financial aid is available to qualified students, including
the GI Bill. Now is the time. Mycomputercareer.edu.
students including the GI Bill. Now is the time mycomputercareer.edu. And now I will make this quick. But I will tell you that I like Matt, there are a couple
options for me for my conspiracy theory. Originally I wanted to do the one when I googled
it the the thing that popped up that I liked
the most, and that was the theory that Michael Jackson and his older sister Latoya Jackson
are, in fact, the same person.
The main evidence was that they look very similar, much like a brother and sister, and that
they were never ever seen in public together.
I was like, oh man, this could be real.
Then I googled Michael Jackson, Latoya Jackson, hit images,
and hundreds of images came off of them together.
Yeah, but Dave, we just learned how easy it is to
doctor an image.
That is true.
That is true.
So I did act, I'm afraid.
I did avoid that because the Illuminati have done it again
So I've decided to go with a spy story instead
So my question to get us on topic is if you were at the Millennium Hotel in London on November 1st 2006
What should you avoid drinking?
shampoo
I'm gonna give it to you In general general that's good advice. That is good advice.
That's how Matt turned out this way. I had a bottle of day addiction for like three
weeks and all of a sudden I'm far whatever. It's not shampoo. It's not shampoo.
It's not shampoo.
Anyone know what it is?
Toilet products.
Toilet products.
Well, I mean, the team may have been able to toilet what I know offense to them on the
embarr.
I don't know them.
Tee.
No, you need tea.
Answer is do not drink the tea.
My report is on the murder of Russian spy Alexander Litz Venenko.
Yeah. I don't remember the first 2006, have you guys heard of this?
No.
If you guys heard it, is it random applause?
Farrow is losing her fucking mind.
And you're going anyone?
Anyone?
Why are you losing your mind?
Buzzfeed on Solve just didn't episode on it.
Oh my god.
Well Buzzfeed on Solve was not watched by me, so there you go.
Well, you know how this ends.
Well, so does everyone.
I just said the murder.
There you go.
All right.
Yes, boy.
Alexander Littfinenko was born in Russia in 1962
when Russia was still the Soviet Union.
His first dropout of school was as an army trooper
for the Russian Ministry of Internal Affairs,
where he quickly rose to the ranks.
So in the late 80s, he was recruited to the KGB,
the Soviet Union's main security agency, very secretive.
Basically, you were...
If it's so secretive, why have we all heard of it?
LAUGHTER
They want you to think you've heard of it.
Is that make sense?
No, basically, he was a spy and started working in military counterintelligence.
The Soviet Union fell, but he remained a part of this spy world, working for the KGB's replacement.
The FSB, fucking sick bastards.
Didn't write that down. You don't know either. His job for the FSP was to specialize in counter terrorist activities and to infiltrate
organized crime.
It was appointed to a quote, special secret unit to investigate organized crime but quickly
became uneasy with what he started to find.
This is where things start to get messy for Alexander.
A journalist's time investigating organized crime, he began to see links between many police officers
and officials of all ranks with the crims from the underworld. He tried to tell his director
about the corruption, but allegedly this had no effect, and he started to realize, hang on.
I think everyone is correct. According to his wife.
Wouldn't you just feel left out there? Oh my god,
you're all in on it. Okay, cool. I'll do the paperwork, you guys go bowling, that's
fine. I can lie too. I'm cool, but maybe corrupt. Well, he actually took a few things he
was asked to do. According to his wife, Alex Ander had objected to a number of tasks he had been assigned,
including in order to kidnap a wealthy, church-neighin businessman in Moscow, killing his bodyguards
that necessary, in order to ransom him for Russia soldiers who were still in captivity in
church-neighin.
In captivity?
That was cute.
Do that again.
Different, romantic captivity.
Never claimed to be able to do that.
Well, Alexander kept complaining.
He was told that he should have a meeting with a newly appointed head of the FSB.
A certain Vladimir Putin.
Oh!
Oh, no! oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, him. Which I love. You walk in there and he's just like, fuck off. I'm starting to sense
that he doesn't really like me. But I will continue with my complaints.
Fed up with no accident in late 1998, Little Venco took his complaints to a whole new level
in held a press conference with some of his colleagues to publicize their complaints
about the allegedly corrupt KSB, FSB, KGB, all
the shit. It hates all the acronyms, all the initialisms, they're all bad, they're bad,
NBA, get out. Most of those at the press conference cover their faces to hide their identities,
but Alexander did not. He also penned an open letter to Putin asking him to properly investigate his complaints
against senior officials.
He was a very, very brave man.
After holding the press conference, Lidavenko was dismissed from the FSB, but he didn't
back down.
In 1999, he co-wrote a book called, quote, blowing up Russia, terror from within.
That's a better book title.
It's way better.
Not blow up Russia.
People are like, all right, you got my attention.
That's not glib.
This book accused Vladimir Putin of being behind a series of apartment bombings that killed
nearly 300 Russians in the 90s.
He claimed Putin was behind the attacks to tighten his own group on power as the public
would terrify they could be next.
Basically, he's saying that Putin blamed these Chechnya rebels and said, if you get
me in charge of the country, I'll sort it out.
But he's saying, Putin blew up these buildings.
Just like what you're going to record that he said that, Putin, if you're listening, I'm
not saying that.
Putin is definitely listening.
Big fan, yeah, no, it loves that stuff, yeah, it's really sweet.
Love Putin, love his piano work, good stuff.
You guys seen that video? Very good.
No.
So basically he's coming out.
He's called Putin al-Iah.
He's accusing him of stuff.
He's had a press conference.
He's publishing articles.
Now he's written a book.
He spent nine months in prison on charges of abuse of authority.
And when he was released, he was ordered not to leave Moscow.
But in the year 2000, he got the hell out of there and flew to Turkey via the Ukraine. He applied for asylum at the US Embassy in Turkey, but he was
denied, so he bought a ticket from Istanbul to Moscow via London.
Oh, it sounds like a fun Kentucky.
It's actually the worst flight path. You're going to go all the way back over there.
Yeah, second time. But. Yeah.. But yeah, they're not well organized
those things. Right, we're going to spend six minutes in Belgium. Take your photo, get
in the bus. During his plane's quick stop over in London,
he applied for asylum. So they pulled over to like, really fuel and he was like, can I have
asylum? And they said yes. Nice. He was granted asylum. So he's new off in the UK, he's doing well.
Great, he's happy he's happening, he's safe now.
Or is he?
Don't give away the ending.
He worked as a journalist.
I don't know what he is though.
All right, can he is?
Are he a nice sweet?
My director, can he's here tonight?
Alexander Lutmanenko!
Yeah!
There he is. Try the tea. All right. Wait. Matt Rector, I can't even hear tonight! Alexander Lutman and Gaud!
There he is!
Try the tea, alright.
We'll get to the tea.
Stop teasing!
Oh!
Radar applause!
Come on.
Thank you.
Matt, not such a big fan of pun work, but I am
No, Matt's the pun king Yeah, he himself let's title one time and hates every time I bring it up
Matt the pun king
You've zoned out haven't you I think it's getting late, but um I
Have had fun. Let's just yeah, let's call it a night
It's anyone.
Hey, hey.
Did you see when we started?
Yeah, I did, I did.
Let me just tell you.
How we going?
Yeah, that's good to do the admin on Mike.
All right, I'll be able to get through this quick.
I'll be able to get through this quick.
Okay, we won't interject.
No, please continue interject.
So he works as a journalist in the UK for a bit.
He was also paired by MI5 and MI6,
which is the British intelligence, James Bond style.
And they did my fanfare recently.
They're all, every number is a different,
different guy.
There's like, there's an MI3 and other things as well.
Fact, that's a fact.
Is that true?
You saw, you saw a Buzzfeed video.
I said MI3, GoddamnRotter did.
Wait, what did I do wrong?
Why?
Three?
No, look, let's go to the tape.
I said, whatever was correct, thank you.
So his work is journalist, he's given a bit of info to the UK MI5 MI6 and he's continuing
to be a vocal critic of the FSB and Putin in particular
who was now Russia's president and accuses him of being involved in lots of dodgy stuff.
He said that he's dodgy.
DUDGY.
DUDGY STUFF.
I don't listen back to the tape and I go, I didn't sound like that, but anyway.
So he's accused Putin of being involved with people like Saddam who's saying, giving
him weapons.
Yes, the astagate man. Yes, maybe he sold him the stargate. So he's accused Putin of being involved with people like Saddam who's saying, giving him weapons.
Yes, the A.A.
Stargate, man.
Yes, maybe he sold him the Stargate, I can't tell you that's true or not.
You can't confirm it nor deny it.
Nor deny.
Which means it's true.
Illuminati confirmed.
Which is way better than Illuminati denies.
He also said that Putin was involved in the London bombing of 2005, and also these dealing
arms to all these people.
So he's accusing of being involved in a lot of conspiracies, if you will.
Definitely, I said it would work the audience, doesn't he?
Bang, bang, bang.
It's all about the eyes.
It's all about the eyes, it's all about the eyes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
One of his wildest claims about Putin in particular
is that Vladimir Putin is a pedophile.
Oh, boy.
Oh, boy.
He's coming.
Wait, I missed the start of the sentence.
Is that a fact?
No, no, no.
So one of his wildest claims, he published an article
accusing Vladimir Putin of being a pedophile. Oh my god. He published an article accusing Vladimir Putin of being a pedophile.
Oh my god.
He published this article and he published with it a photo.
I thought that is a big one.
No.
That's what this guy is saying, remember.
This guy said that.
And he published.
Not us Putin.
He published an article and with the article he attached a photo of Vladimir Putin kissing
a child on the belly.
Which is weird, but it's one of those, you know.
No, you kissed the kid on the belly.
I know, so weird.
I remember he's accusing a man.
Unless he's doing raspberry, because they are fun.
Raspberries are bloody fun, you know, on the belly.
She had just make sure, you know, the kids pretty well.
Preferably they're your kids.
Yeah.
Or like very close relatives, like a niece or a nephew or something.
Not just a stranger.
But you're kissing on the belly.
Yeah, I'd agree with that.
I mean, we do that today, but he's a good boy.
And I love it.
I can't wait to get one up of the show because this reporter is banging
So he's accusing Vladimir Putin of being a pedophile
I'm not doing it! She's got that!
Matt
It would be my honor
Perfect So, to get us back on track, Putin, pedophile, great It would be my honor. Perfect.
So, to get us back on track, Putin, Pettifull.
Great.
He's accusing him of that.
He's accusing that of a man he believes blew up 300 of his own citizens just to gain
power.
So he's playing a very dangerous game, so I would say.
So in November 1st, 2006, Alexander Lippenenko intended a a prearranged meeting with two former colleagues of the KGB.
Andre Lugavoy, Dmitri Copton. They met at the Pine Bar of the Millennium Hotel in Mayfair and London.
That's the birthday when he mentioned it as the...
Yeah, we're getting to the juicy bit.
The tea-y bit.
The tea-y bit. You can drink the juice.
Yeah, juice is fine.
Okay, good.
What sort of juice have they?
They have all sorts of juice.
They have pineapple?
They don't always have pineapple.
At this place.
Oh, I love pineapple juice.
They don't have grapefruit.
Because it's sour and tastes fucking good.
Yeah, grapefruit sour.
It's unclear what the meeting was about, but Lib Venenko had known Luga voice since the
90s, so they know each other a long time.
Alexander had a cup of tea.
Do they have watermelon juice?
Yeah, yeah, it's good stuff.
But the tea, we're talking about the tea here.
Ah, yes.
Alexander.
Pappamint.
He had a cup of English tea.
Poured from a tea pot, he drank the tea and then he left.
Shortly afterward while dining at a sushi restaurant with his friend,
Maro Scaremella, Lipponeco began to experience intense nausea
and even the loss of the use of his legs.
Knowing something was wrong,
I probably didn't have to say that.
He entered a London hospital where severe burns in his throat were indicative of poisoning
of some kind.
For several weeks, Lippe-Netko's condition worsened as doctors searched for the cause
of this illness.
Surrounded by friends, Lippe-Netko became physically weak and spent periods unconscious.
It was clear that he'd been poisoned by something.
He claimed that the Russian government had conspired to kill him, so he was transferred to a UK hospital under police guard.
Oh, I love that.
Ooh.
Tests were run, but a cause of the poisoning couldn't be found.
They run a lot of these tests,
but all coming to a dead end,
so they send Alexander's blood and urine samples
to a top-secret British nuclear site, Older Master.
And he's still alive.
At this stage.
And he, what about the sushi you're
gonna rule that out because I'm at the moment I think that just was the sushi
wasn't quite that that happens tea you can't get poisoned by tea but sushi we
will talk about the sushi yeah we fucking will the blood was tested for
radiation and showed an unusual spike that couldn't be explained
by the scientists.
Mercury.
One of the scientists who worked on the nuclear bomb program in the UK overheard other
scientists discussing the results in the break room.
He explained he'd seen this gamma ray spike before and then it came from Polonium, specifically
Polonium 210.
The discovery was pure chance, but let them
to understand what was happening to Alexander's body.
Now, a bit of background here.
Polonium, we've talked about that before in the show,
was discovered in 1898 by a previous report topic.
Marvel superheroes.
Marvel superheroes.
Marikiri.
Marikiri, and his named after Marikiri is home country of Poland,
Pallonium. Pallonium is extremely radioactive and 100% deadly.
It has been estimated that a median lethal dose of Pallonium 210 is 0.089 micrograms.
For comparison, one grain of table salt is about 0.06 micrograms. For comparison, one grain of table salt is about 0.06 micrograms, so less
than 15 grains of salt worth will kill most people.
But he's not most people. He ate most people. He's still kicking.
I tried to do that in like a Dave voice. Did I know it?
Yes. That was great. I wouldn't be so concerned.
Let me try.
I'm Dave.
Go do more.
What else would he say?
Oh, look at me with my hat of hair.
My hat of hair.
Yeah, because you got little Lego boy.
Oh, fine, that's fine.
I thought I was being accused of wearing a hat.
You can't buy this look.
I did. No, what you want to.
Finally on that planium, it's so deadly because it leads to the destruction of all cells
and organ failure throughout the body.
A planium, as a poison, had never been documented before and it was probably the first time
anyone had been tested for the presence of two-ten planium in their body.
But it's bad news, it was affecting his liver, kidneys, and heart.
He described himself as a living murder victim
and published a photo of himself dying in hospital
completely bald from the poisoning.
Wanting to show the world what Vladimir Putin had done to him.
The discovery was also bad because it
meant that other people might be injured
or killed by the radiation.
It could be all over London.
So the government's health body declared
immediate warning and set up a public contamination zone. Twenty scientists working all night
to find traces of the radioactive substance and it was found on aeroplanes, in cars, in
a football stadium, in restaurants and in hotels. All in all, forty sites were found to be
contaminated by polonia. It was even found in the London Underground.
40, though.
40.
Mmm.
I mean, well, over 40.
So 50.
Ah.
That was a roller coaster.
It was even found in the London Underground, but this information was kept quiet at the
time to stop public panic.
Mmm.
A great thing about this, that was the author.
No, because then they'd have an excuse not to take the train.
Like, I can't come to work.
Trains are poisoned.
That'd be awesome.
That'd be great, excuse me.
That'd be so good.
Ah, Polonium 210, have you heard of it?
Ah, hello, Rita Boor.
100% deadly.
Yeah, so I sat in my boss all the time.
I don't keep jobs for long.
A good thing about the Polonium was thatium was that they were able to trace the movement and who would
brought in the Polonium.
We'll get back to that in a moment.
But before the poison killed at Venenko, it took an agonizing 23 days and he was very,
very ill.
Just before he died, he signed a statement placing the blame for his murder, squarely at Vladimir
Putin's feet.
Oh, very, very yucky. His feet are heinous. He signed a statement placing the blame for his murder squarely at Vladimir Putin's feet.
Very yucky. His feet are heinous.
Doesn't clip his toenails.
However, Putin wasn't the first person he accused of his murder. More on that in a minute as well. Ooh, it will go to an ad break.
We'll be right back.
In his final statement, Livineko said, No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Okay, 1500 grains of salt. That's a lot of salt.
I'd be okay with that much salt though. The hospital room he was in was sealed after his death to stop further contamination.
So you're wondering who did it?
Answers. Here they are.
So the two main suspects were the two men that Alexander admitted at the Millennium Hotel.
Dimitri Cofton and Andre Lugavoy, and to be honest, there is a lot of evidence
against them.
Ah, CZ, this is the strongest stuff.
CCTV shows Lugavoy walking to the toilet in the Millennium Bar with his hand in his
pocket.
And I know when I'm getting ready to poison someone some radioactive material, my hand
straight to my pocket, even though I'm struggling to do it.
I don't drop the drop, okay. That was so I'm struggling to do it. I don't drop, don't drop, don't drop.
That was so worth it.
So worth it.
His mate, Dimitri Cofton, can also be seeing going
to the John in CCTV with his hand in his pocket.
And I've maybe seen documentary
or watched on this note that he was in there
for three whole minutes.
Three, what else would he be doing in there?
Three minutes.
Polonin, exactly.
Hand in his pants. Three minutes. Polonium. Exactly. Hmm. Hand in his pants. Three minutes? Three minutes. I think I know what I'd be doing.
Poisoning that guy. So that's all, that's all obviously pretty
circumstantial, but the bathroom sink hand dryer
and toilet were tested and all found to have some of the strongest traces of polonium.
So that's pretty, that's pretty dammit.
The meeting was actually the second time they met with Alexander in London, that also met
a month before, also at a sushi bar that was later found to have traces of polonium.
So they may have tried to kill him on the first day, but he didn't eat, they wanted him
too. But then they went back to Russia and then came back to London
or whilst carrying this polonium, which seems like a lot of work to kill one man.
That's what you do what you got to do, you know. You know what you do. You know what you
do. You got to do. You got to job. It's a living. It's a living. It's a living. Is it a
living? It is a living. Okay, it's a living. What I said then.
So I want to tell you that in, so they had an inquiry in this, in the UK, in the UK,
and Judge Robert Owen shared the British government inquiry into the lippen echo killing,
and his findings, in his findings, he said he was certain Lugavoy and Cofton, the two KGB guys,
killed Limpeneko by placing a lethal dose of Polonium in his tea.
By this time,
Lugavoy was elected a member of the Russian State Parliament, meaning he
couldn't be extra-dotted for the crime. Russia has also previously said it
won't allow citizens to be extradited to Britain to face trial, so certainly
that I remember to the parliament. So they're like, no, no, he'll never go on
trial, which is dodgy. So aside from the conspiracy theory that these Russian agents backed by the Russian government,
poisoned a man on UK soil with Polonium, and put a whole lot of innocent people at risk,
and that Vladimir Putin was self-behind the entire thing, there are some other conspiracy theories,
which are that it isn't what it looks like, only that it's what it meant, what it's meant to look like.
Hmm?
Three off the, the scent thereby, mispronouncing the sentence.
I read a guy Justin Riemondo right on modelization.canada, or dot CA, he wrote quote to begin with,
if the Russians wanted to off-lip Venenko, why were they poisoning with a substance that left
a radioactive trail traceable from Germany to Heathrow Airport, and in the process contaminating scores of hotel
rooms, offices, planes, restaurants, and homes?
Why not just put a bullet through his head?
It makes no sense.
What do you say to that?
I mean like a bullet, sure.
But it's a bit less dramatic, isn't it?
Yeah, what about the art, you know?
The drama.
Yeah, a bit of dramatic. Yeah, what about the art? Yeah, the drama.
Yeah, a bit of pride in your work.
Yeah.
That's such like level A murdering that guy we're talking about.
You know what I mean?
You don't hire these guys for level A, but it is.
Double A.
Double A.
Double A.
A Ramanu also writes there are indications that Lippeneko was engaged in the smuggling of
nuclear materials.
That he wound up being contaminated by the goods he was peddling on the black market
seems far more credible than the cock and bull story about a Russian plot originating
in the Kremlin.
But others take the cock and bull story further and say that Lidvinenko was taken out possibly by the UK government to make it
look like the Russian government did it.
Perhaps Vladimir Putin won't allow these KGBA'dans accused of the murder to be extradited
because he doesn't believe they'll get a fair trial.
They'll be found guilty of the crime and Putin will be accused of being behind it all.
So you actually killed him.
You're asked, Matt. Who? Ah, yeah. Didn't you tell us before? or be accused of being behind it all. So you actually killed him, your ass man.
Who?
Ah yeah, didn't you tell us before?
Huh!
Wasn't those guys who were jizzin' in their pants?
There is another man jizzing in his pants.
What?
Now I mentioned before,
I mentioned before that after the apparent poisoning
at the Millennium Hotel,
he met a man for lunch at a sushi bar.
A man named Mario Scaramella, what I didn't say is that Mario Scaramella is a nuclear expert.
The pair met at a sushi restaurant in Piccadilly, London.
Scaramella has stated he ate nothing and drank only water at the restaurant.
Suspicious?
Or maybe he doesn't like Japanese.
Maybe just one of those people that agrees
to go out for lunch with you, then doesn't order anything,
and then you kind of feel awkward,
because you're like, well, I mean,
I didn't pre-eat lunch for this lunch arrangement,
so I'm gonna have some lunch,
but I feel like a dick and you've
done this to me but you sit there in your chat while you eat and they watch you eat and
that feels weird because then you're like is there food all over my mouth? There is isn't
that they're not saying anything because they're obviously not a very good friend because
they didn't even have lunch at our lunch date you know.
I know. I know. And that concludes my TED Talk on friendship.
I just want to do a TED Talk is on saying, you'd be great.
A TED Internet?
No, I'll write.
We did invite them.
I just do to some of you, Wiki Spooks, which is a very spooky website.
Says, Scaramalla is a self-acclaimed expert
and nuclear waste and worldwide locations of nuclear waste
and another man with a dark past.
Yet his name has been left out of the equation
by the press for so many years
while the blame Putin-diotribe has been milked
to the cows come home.
The independent described ScaramallaAlor is someone that claims
to be a professor at a university that has never heard of him and a consultant to a body
that has no fixed address. Very mysterious.
Then again I'm pretty sure my uni would be like who?
Pays get degrees! Thank you so much, yes.
I can spiritually theorist will tell you or her pathasize that
Scaramela squirted radioactive poison onto Alexander's sushi
in the bathroom.
Wait, wait, wait.
Hand down the pants.
Three minutes later, he squirted poison on his sushi. So what you said? Yeah.
Yeah pretty much. I'll check that. Remember he only started feeling sick after he was meeting this guy
at the sushi bar and the other guy didn't eat anything. Did scaremella poison Alexander to take
him out and then also pin the crime on Putin and his foot soldiers. And I remember when I said earlier that Putin wasn't the first person that Alexander
accused of murdering him.
Well, the first person he publicly accused was, scary mella himself.
Alexander quickly changed the story and started to accuse Putin.
Because he was like, well, I'm dying.
May as well take Putin down.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
One last girl, I don't know, I can't hurt.
Is anyone else confused?
What are you confused by?
Let me sum it up for you.
In a lot of people.
Alexander hates Putin.
In most of the UK, he's like, I'm gonna fuck you up, maybe.
Two KGB guys, he meets with them, then you get thrill sick.
Did they poison him? Or did the guy he met after them poison him at the sushi bath?
Yeah, now we're still confused.
Are you confused, really?
No, you're fine.
I'm with you 100%.
I mean, I'm trying to speed through it. I'm trying to speed through it.
To be honest.
You're doing great. Hey, no, hey, don't let us shout at your confidence.
I feel like Matt is shattering my confidence.
Matt, lift up his confidence.
Hey, you wearing a beautiful hat of hair.
Thank you, thank you.
Go on, beautiful boy.
I've just got a summary here.
In summary, the question is, was it a conspiracy
by the Russian government?
Or was it a conspiracy to make it look like
a Russian conspiracy? Or was it a conspiracy to make it look like a Russian conspiracy? Or was it a conspiracy to make it look like a Russian conspiracy and
throw us off the scent of the real conspiracy that Michael and the Toya Jackson
are in fact the same person? Thank you and good night!
Well done. Inconceivable.
That was great.
Induvidably.
And I think we can conclude that yes.
And answer to all our questions.
Yes.
Well, what a bloody, great time it's been.
Let's all go back through and recap our reports.
From the top.
Thanks so much for sticking with us.
That was a pretty long show.
Yeah, thank you.
Sorry, and thank you.
Thanks.
We really do appreciate you coming out.
This is 150th.
What is that?
Pretty bloody good? That's huge. Canada just turned out in 50 last year. We really do appreciate you coming out. This is 150th. What is that?
Pretty bloody good.
That's huge.
Canada just turned 150 last year.
We're bloody catchin' them.
You know that?
Easy.
Give us one more week.
Yeah.
Next week we're older than Canada.
And this is our biggest show to date as well.
So thank you so much to you guys for coming out.
Thank you.
It really does mean a lot to us. Thank you so much to you guys for your very good luck. Thank you.
It really does mean a lot to us, so thank you.
I think I pretty much wraps it up for us, but we will be down the back standing near our T-shirts.
If you want to have more drinks, the bar is going to be over for another hour or so.
A few of you may have heard that I've christened myself the Snack Captain for our UK tour.
Here we go.
And I just see if anybody had like spare change,
you want to chuck in.
For snacks and magnets, it is optional,
but I'll be hungry if you don't.
So there is a jar at the back as well.
If you want to, oh, I was just trying to get some change
or whatever, like if you've got it,
no, it's a preferred, whatever.
You got change, right there, don't throw it at us, please.
No, there's a jug, it's all good
and it will go towards snacks and all magnets.
This is very uncouth.
Yeah, Matt hates it, therefore put more in.
LAUGHTER
And I love snacks and magnets.
So yeah.
Alright, let's hear it for the YIT guy.
YIT! Let's hear it for OBLONG!
Our main man is to match Stuart in the front row.
The real match Stuart.
The owner on sound.
Alana and everyone here at the Giant Dwarf, you're amazing.
Allian Oli.
And I guess here to finish, I guess we could say with all three, Illuminati confirmed.
Good night!
Stick around!
What a triumph.
We're back in the studio.
Thank you for listening to that live episode.
A real trip ditch.
A little bit of Map Jess and Dave Flavor all in one pot there.
Some would say a masterpiece.
A trip ditch boss.
Things with three flavors in one pot.
Oh yes, a culinary trip ditch.
Ooh.
Yum yum yum.
What's your flavor?
Chef Pepe Pepe.
Tell me, what's your flavor?
Craig.
All right, Craig, David.
Am I right?
There's exactly which is gone for us.
All right.
Just telling over our own joke back to you.
But anyway, what are our three flavors?
And then do they go together?
Matt's obviously vanilla.
I'm French.
French vanilla.
Dave, what's your flavor?
Blue cheese.
Mint. Yeah. You, mint, yeah.
That is all. You two got together great. I'm going to know what.
Correct. Take a fucking hint. I'm on my own here. Can we separate the two out?
I might actually, can I make mine coffee? Okay.
Okay. Dave and I after the Sydney show, well the next night we went out on a date you did you like it was a beautiful meal
We went out for an Italian meal. Oh, and then I kept telling people it was a pizza restaurant. We had pasta and risotto
I
Had I'm yokey which is potato is not past is and
Passes that's a remote that's a great rock. It's great. It a great, it's really good sketch.
Tadders, not pastors.
Excuse me?
I just noticed that the nockie was in the past section.
What's up with that?
It should be with the potatoes.
Nockies, no pasta.
The Jordan rest couple of.
Yeah.
Oh.
So, oh yeah, I was going to say we went out for, and then we went for a walk,
and then we went to an ice cream restaurant.
You're cuties.
You're probably not a restaurant, is it?
Ice cream parlour.
You called it Marie.
You were looking for, quote, a dessert bar.
I wanted a dessert bar.
I'd heard of them, and the ones we found
had cutes going out out the wazoo,
which is the front door, and Sydney they call them wazoo's. But we did find this
just great little ice creamery. And we had a couple of fudge sundaes.
Fudge and cheese. And that's what made me that, because I did have French vanilla and coffee.
Two scoops, you got two choices. Dave, what did you get for?
I went with Belgian chocolate and coconut. Oh, interesting. A couple couple of great. I would have gone for a chocolate mint easy. I love chocolate as well my fave my classic combo
Which doesn't mix well together at all?
Chocolate and boys and berry swan. Yeah, fucking love boys and berry. Yes, let's ice cream together any time
Yes, they fuck off you coconut a hate coconut. I really like coconut
I'm all like joking. Get out of here.
Get on the mint chocolate.
Boys are very trained all get out.
Well, I reckon mint really takes away
from the greatness of the chocolate.
There is something wrong with your brain.
We were having fun Dave.
And then, you know, nice time.
What about when we're having fun eating
those ice creams together Matt?
Yeah, that was really nice.
That was a great sweet.
That same night. I was watching nice. That's really sweet.
That same night.
I was watching the footy on my phone.
Oh, it was going.
What's going on there?
And I said, shush.
Maddox, you explain the ins and outs.
It was a big game.
It was, yeah, it was going, anyway.
It was a lot of...
This great quick outro we're doing here.
Yeah, basically, sorry, we probably should have said, we're here, at the end of the episode,
if you haven't heard before to pay tribute to our
Patreon supporters basically we've set up a Patreon a while ago now for people that really like the show and want to support it
and for financially you can do so and make this you know become part of our day job which is really cool and you get bonus rewards in return like bonus
episodes you get shout-outs you get to vote for the topics, you get to know about stuff in advance, Matt does a newsletter. So you guys too, we've got a pre-sale.
Yeah, we do pre-sales, yeah, so.
And we also, I do a weekly newsletter,
which always includes me messaging Dave and Jess going,
hey, anything you want to say?
And sometimes Jess will say, here's a list of words.
I did do that one time.
Sometimes you'll say, I'm hungry for food.
What, asking what food they like? I also did that one time. Sometimes you'll say, I'm hungry for food. What, asking what food do I like?
I also did that one time.
It's a lot of great insight.
Matt, don't give away the content for free.
Oh, that's true.
I feel hunger.
I'm here, man.
Yeah.
And other times, I know words.
Anyway.
Dave, very rarely.
Well, basically, could you give us about three minutes
to reply and if we haven't,
you've already get posted on the food.
I guess Dave's not interested in our seat five minutes later. I'm like, yeah, how about, oh, could you give us about three minutes to reply and if we haven't, you've already get posted on the screen. I guess Dave's not interested.
I see it five minutes later and I'm like, yeah, how about, oh, okay.
I'll do like, okay.
Okay.
Oh, okay.
But apart from all that, on one level in the Patreon, you get to contribute a fact-quote
or question.
And that is put into the segment, which is called fact quote or question.
I saw someone has made a jingle for this, which I got a, I got a refund.
I saw it somewhere and I got a count for anyway.
This week's fact quote or question is from Mark Chopper Reed.
And the fact quote or question, give her also gets to give themselves a title. And Chopper has given himself the title,
the man in charge of the little things.
Oh, I like that because we know from little things,
big things grow.
That is very true.
And also there's big picture people.
There's also little picture people.
And they're very important.
Very important.
We're a team.
The day-to-day operations.
Yep.
And this week he's offered us a fact.
Oh, probably my favorite.
I'd like to learn.
Yes.
Yeah, because you're a nerd.
Or dispute.
I like questions, because I like to talk about me.
I don't.
Yeah, because you're a self-obsessed nerd.
No.
He's, I actually came across this fact while I used to work in TV game show fact checking.
Quit bragging.
Sorry.
Oh, I love you.
Oh, signal.
I'm worried that Matt, you are actually going to be like, actually, I found that this was
untrue.
No, I think this one went through the show.
I have, like I, and I, I, I've a little peak on the curtain. I am not checking any of these things.
I'm reading them word for it as they've been written. And as we found a few weeks ago,
some of them are inconsistent even within the paragraph. But anyway, this is from the man in charge of little things.
Indigenous people of Mexico and Central America
used the Nahuiti word ahul-kati
to mean both testicles and avocado.
Oh no.
The fruits were...
Do you know how often I'd get a smashed testicle
on toast for breakfast
Cup of times a week. Yeah
The fruits were originally marketed as alligator pairs in the United States until the current name stuff
alligator pairs obviously make sense because they're in a pear shape and their skin is very
Alligatory. Yeah very reptilian and then they Avocado after the- I love the word avocado though.
So pretty good.
Was the question on the quiz show, Matt, that you checked, the Nahooiti word for avocado
is also the word for what?
A. Testicles, B. Penis, C. A. Anus.
Oh, and the part that I was familiar with was the alligator.
Oh, right, right, okay, right, cool.
That was a bit of a toofa from-
Yeah, toofa, that was a good stuff. Thanks so much for that, Matt. Oh, right, right. Okay, right. That was a bit of a two-fer from. Yeah, two-fer.
That was a little one. I like that. Thanks so much for that, Mark.
It's nice. In charge of little little things, which I like.
Yeah. We need those people. Thank you.
And we also like to thank a few other Patreons each week.
Dave, they're on a different level in the Patreon support.
And we've been doing this for quite a while.
And we think a few each week.
And Jess comes up with a little game for us to play.
So we just talked about conspiracy.
So I know it's hard.
I don't know.
Can you offer a conspiracy about this person,
each?
Something that goes all the way to the top.
Fuck yes.
Oh, OK.
OK.
All right.
And I've just had a look at my names here
that I'm going to pluck out. And they'm just that a look at my name here that I'm gonna pluck out
and they are a couple of ball-out-a-e crackers.
I'd love to thank from CSEY in Arizona, A.R. in the U.S.
Molly Harden.
Oh.
Molly's a crack in there.
Love Molly.
Love Molly, Molly Harden.
So good.
Sounds like a, like a, um, a PI. Yeah. Molly Harden, so good. Sounds like a, like a, um, a, um, a PI.
Yeah.
Molly Harden, PI.
Yeah.
I love that.
Good on you, Molly.
Uh, okay.
Conspiracy theory about Molly.
Oh my goodness.
I, I don't mean to blow anyone's minds, but maybe this is a conspiracy, but A.R.
It's an Arizona.
It's Arkansas.
I don't know if that's a conspiracy.
I think it is. Okay. It's like just an error on my, but Arkansas. I don't know if that's a conspiracy. I think it is.
It's like just an error on my...
Arkansas.
Arkansas.
What's the...
What's the...
Can you give me a factor about Arkansas, Dave?
Is it Arkansas or Arkansas?
Arkansas.
Arkansas.
Silent second S.
That's hot.
Little rock is the capital,
which is a little rock.
A little rock, like that, little rock.
Oh, conspiracy, the rock.
Very big.
It's actually a big rock.
So they don't want us to know.
They don't want us to know.
They don't want us to know.
Yes.
Because they're hiding something under the rock.
I'm a big key.
Yeah, you put keys under a rock in your front door.
You're hiding a big key for a big thing.
What's big?
The White House.
The White House, keep for the White House,
that's the big one.
All the way to the White House baby.
Whoa.
We are on to you Molly and we are coming for the big rock.
Yeah, we know you got something to do with that
over in Little Rock.
We're on to you.
Even though she's from CSE.
Yeah, she would say that.
CSE Arkansas.
That was fun.
I enjoyed getting riled up over that.
Yeah. Let's do it again.
All right.
Can I also think, from Silverdale and New South Wales, Australia.
Okay.
Which we know doesn't exist but anyway.
Australia.
Oh yeah, right.
Oh, from the show that we just did.
I'd also like to thank Jenny Schmidt.
Schmidt.
Schmidtie. I love Schmidtie Schmidt. Schmidt. Schmidtie.
I love Schmidtie as a name.
Schmidtie.
Schmidtie.
Cracken surname.
Jenny Schmidt.
Okay.
Dave.
How are you under the bus?
Jenny Schmidt.
Well, I think she is behind the fact that all M&M's
taste the same.
You have different colors.
Right. Even the peanut ones. What is up with this is the crisp yours. They're all the same.&Ms taste the same. You have different colors.
Right.
Even the peanut ones.
What is up with this is the crispier.
They're all the same.
They're all the same.
It's just a marketing conspiracy.
Peanut butter ones.
A marketing conspiracy.
Caramel ones, yeah.
Marketing conspiracy.
I haven't had them.
You would have thought they're good,
but they're just having plain ones.
They're all the fucking same.
Dave, I've cut them in half and seen the caramel.
Is that all that so part of the conspiracy?
So we're brainwashed to believe that they...
Yeah, so you play more for the crispy ones.
Wow.
It's ridiculous.
That is ridiculous.
Jenny!
Jenny?
I expected better from you.
And for some reason it comes out of Silverdale and New South Wales.
Yeah.
I told you it goes all the way at the top.
The top of Silverdale.
Assume you have some sort of mountain peak.
Wow, that is exciting.
Can I also ask some people?
Thank some people?
Please.
Let's ask some questions.
That's probe a little.
Yeah, let's fucking get to the ball.
Oh, probe's very consistent.
Yeah.
I would like to thank from Brisbane in Queensland.
I love Brisbane so much.
Also in Australia, don't know this.
Neil Campton.
Good name.
Neil Campton.
Neil Campton.
What do you feel about Neil?
Neil Campton, yeah.
Well, I'm afraid he is actually not really a human.
Whoa!
He's a humanoid.
Oh. If you pull off his face face and I wouldn't recommend doing it because it would put you
in deep duct danger. Deep duct danger.
Triple D. And you don't want to be there. I don't want to be in the triple D. No.
If you're in the double D, that's bad enough. Triple D. No, but no good. I mean, no one's
that have been seen again. If you take off your head, you will find he's actually a glow worm. Controlling the body with little
joysticks. No.
Just don't be ridiculous.
Fucking hell, Jess.
Do you remember the one when we were doing movie plots
after the room?
You're just asking questions like, no.
Oh, do you mean this?
No.
It's not leave as he is the police system.
A glow worm, pop it master.
Yeah, and he's not the only one.
He's part of a secret society and they do control.
What are they called?
The glow globes.
Oh wow, that's kind of cool, I guess.
Yeah, the globes.
Are they based in Brisbane?
They're based everywhere.
Oh my God.
We is there one in this room right now?
Hi guys
Delayed what they would say
I'm definitely not a glow worm. Oh, this is how I start every conversation
I don't know what does check out he does start every conversation like this normal person doing normal glow worm
I mean hang on hang on there's no light in this room at all.
We don't sit in a dark room.
Just me glowing.
So thank you to Neil, your little glowworm.
Do they mean harm or are they peaceful people?
Well, they just keep everything cooking alone.
Oh, great.
OK, well then I'd also like to thank
from Hampton, in Victoria.
Ooh, Bayside. Bayside. Ooh, they sighed.
They sighed.
Sam, Marklein?
Hmm.
Are you asking questions?
Well, it could be Mark Holland, but it's probably Marklein, Eric.
Eric.
And I like it.
Also, Colin, that I'm my car.
Uh.
Conspiracy?
Nah.
Is Colin named after Colin Lane?
Sure. No.
His name's Colin.
Oh, sorry. Some question.
Yeah. Not everything has to be named after him.
Not every car is named after someone from Laino Wembley.
Yeah.
Even though every time the three of us are in a car, we sing the theme song.
We sure do.
God, we're cute.
Anyway, back to saying.
Dave, what's this one Anyway, back to Sam.
Dave, what's this one about? What's Sam being up to?
Sam is secretly...
Neil Diamond.
What?
Yeah.
Is this like a Hannah Montana kind of thing?
I mean, yeah, yeah.
And he's, he's, he's,
because he'd never expect Neil Diamond to live in Hampton.
No, you wouldn't.
But he's in a fully...
He does, though. Right. Because he's Neil Diamond. Diamond to live in Hampton. No, he wouldn't. That'd be a beautiful area. He does though.
Right.
Because he's Neil Diamond.
That makes sense.
So when he puts on the Neil Diamond here,
and the rhinestone cowboy shirt,
if he wears those, and that's when people...
But he can take that off and he's like,
oh, I'm regular person.
Yeah, exactly how do I want to handle stuff?
Hey, I'm Sam.
Oh, hi, Sam.
I also imagine he drops about 50 years of age when he takes up the rhinestones. Very good. Yeah, exactly how do I want to handle stuff? Hey, I'm Sam. Oh, hi, Sam. I also imagine he drops about 50 years of age
when he takes up the grants.
He's very good.
Yeah, they age.
I don't know why I'm guessing Sam to be
about 50 years younger than Neil Diamond,
probably puts him in the 20s to 30s,
which I think is, how old do you think Neil Diamond?
70 to 80?
80.
72 80, Dave. Don't twist my words, you fucking glowworm dick.
Neil Diamond.
Or should I say Sam Markle and is 77 years old?
I mean, I don't know.
Yeah, glowworm dick.
I thought he was about late 60s early seven.
Now we're saying Dave's dick is a glow word.
Yeah. It's a little.
I'll tell you the light is not on in this room. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha There's a new Mexico! Carlos! Aralano or Arriano?
Spending if you are Spanish speaking yourself.
That's great.
That is great.
Carlos is a sweet name.
Oh!
Carlos Santana.
They obviously give Santana.
Although other great Carlos's include...
Richie.
Richie Carlos.
No, Carlos. Carlos. Carlos include Richie Carlos no
Carlos Carlos Vegas
Carl from the Simpsons it's not a Carlos could be yeah, you don't know for sure Why do I want to know I think I knew a lot of Carlos's and now I can't think of any because it's a fucking
Conspiracy and that is the conspiracy is that you think you know
You think you know Carlos's but there's only one and his name is caros alleyano
So if you're at work and someone's like who's in Carlos and you're like which Carlos and then they go
What do you mean and then you think about it?
And then you go hang on there's only one it's one of those mandela effect things. You think you remember knowing lots of car losses, but you've never met one
You know never met one Nelson Mandela, but you don't you know Carlos. You know Carlos the one
Are you googling car loss now? This has gone very long. We should be wrapping this up
Yeah, I'm just looking at all these great car losses and I there are plenty that I know
Including one that I don't know basketball player called Carlos Boosa
Not a real person.
Obviously the internet just quickly made up this page.
It'd be good.
Google algorithm.
Boosa.
Okay, guys, come on.
I thought you were better than that.
Come on.
But we're down to one over Lord, the one Carlos Arilano.
Arillano.
I would also like to thank from, finally, Denton in Texas.
Didn't know that existed before today, but now I want to go finally, Denton in Texas. Did know that existed before today,
but now I wanna go there.
Denton, Texas.
Keely, Hagenbush.
Oh my God.
And I say, no, no, no, Keely.
Hagenbush, nah, Hagenbush.
Hagenbush, which is such a great name.
This is six of the best names yet again.
I mean, New World Record again.
That's too weak after weak.
God, they are good. Finally, bring us home.
Yes, what's the conspiracy concerning?
Killy.
I thought you'd ask me, and I don't know.
The two Dentons, I think of.
Andrew.
And Terry.
Of course.
So maybe an illustrator or some sort of rope related.
Is that Denton in Texas is the main rope manufacturer, but they just rationed it out to us because
they're holding off.
To keep the process of rope high.
That's a real conspiracy.
And then they're just waiting for that rope shortage and then they're gonna fuck us.
With rope?
With the bump, the price up even more.
Right, so it's kinda like the maple syrup ice.
So they're controlling the price by controlling supply.
Supply and demanded rope, there's big demand.
Is there enough rope?
Well, that's something they ask often.
And if there is, then they're gonna take some away.
Yeah, then they stop sharing.
They've been known to burn their own ropes sometimes.
Yeah.
Unbelievable.
Yeah, well, I believe it.
Nacka's a lawyer at the top.
All the way to Killy Hagenbush.
Hagenbush, that is genuinely one of the best.
Killy Hagenbush, oh my God.
So great. Is it potentially, is it Killy H Hagenbush. Oh my God. It's so great. Is it potentially is it Killy, Hagen, Butch?
It's B-U-C-H on the end.
Mm, I like what you say, but I bet you we're doing it wrong.
But Hagen, I mean, if we're saying it wrong,
Killy, change it because we're doing it better.
Hagenbush is sick. If it's like Hagenbuck, that's shit.
Oh, what? Hagenbuck's great.
Hagenbuck. Hagenbuck.
Hagenbuck. What about Hagenbuch. Hagenbuck. Hagenbuck. What about a Hagenbooch? Oh
Hagenboochin. Oh
I mean I'm changing their name, but I like it. I like where I'm going
Follow my nose
We appreciate that. Glow on Amsterdam. Noises. Thank you so much to everyone that
Supporters on Patreon and to everyone at home, if you're still listening to this, get in contact to us via our website, dogoonpod.com.
Suggest a topic, go to Patreon,
go to our YouTube channel, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram,
all that stuff, and email us.
Dogoonpod.gmo.com.
The line is always open.
Is that true?
I mean, you can't email it any time.
We probably won't see it straight away,
but it's piracy, maybe. Oh, we've got people manning the phones.
Yeah, that's right.
And warmening the phones.
Women can the phones too, you know, it's 2018.
But we've got to get out of here.
Thanks so much for your support, and we'll be back next week with another episode.
But until then, also, thank you, and I will say goodbye.
Goodbye.
Bye. So, but until then, also thank you and I will say goodbye. Bye! Bye! Bye! Bye!
Bye!
Bye!
Bye!
Bye!
Bye!
This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network.
Visit planetbroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mites.
I mean, if you won't, it's up to you.
This episode is brought to you by Progressive.
Most of you aren't just listening right now.
You're driving, cleaning, and even exercising.
But what if you could be saving money by switching to Progressive?
Drivers who save by switching save nearly $750 on average, and auto customers qualify
for an average of 7 discounts.
Multitask right now. Quote today at progressive.com.
Progressive casualty and trans company and affiliates, national average 12 months savings of $744
by new customer surveyed who saved with progressive between June 2022 and May 2023.
Potential savings will vary. Discount is not available in all safe and situations.
Are you working way too hard for way too little? There's never been a better time to consider
a career in IT. You could enjoy a recession-resistant career in a rewarding field, with plenty of growth opportunities and
often flexible work environments. Go to mycomputercareer.edu and take the free career evaluation.
You could start your new career in months, not years. Take classes online or on campus,
and financial aid is available to qualified students including the GI Bill. Now is the time, mycomputercareer.edu.