Doug Loves Movies - Adam Ferrara, Justin Robinson and "Mark Wahlberg" guest
Episode Date: October 24, 2016Live from the Tacoma Comedy Club in Tacoma, Doug welcomes Adam Ferrara, Justin Robinson and "Mark Wahlberg" to the show. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privac...y Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, squeaky babies, sticky seeds
With 50 azepop or kernels in his teeth
There's still not more that he won't see
But Doug loves movies Thank you. Hey, hey, hey, everybody.
My name is Doug, and I love movies.
This is Doug Loves Movies!
Fuck yeah!
Fuck yeah!
Locker room talk.
Fuck yeah.
Locker room talk.
Coming to you for the first time from the Tacoma Comedy Club
in Tacoma, Washington.
There's a bag on this stage
that says,
do not eat on it.
And it's got stuff in it that, what is it?
Marbles or something?
Oh, they're just little donuts,
but are they stale or some shit?
Why does it say don't eat?
I mean, I'm not going to eat them anyway.
Bag of weird donuts.
Loose donuts.
It's Saturday, October 22nd, 2016,
and I apologize for,
this might be one of your few beautiful days
that you have this time of year,
and I made you all come inside,
but I assume that you worked really hard on your name tags.
Oh, no.
Oh, it's another good one.
TJ Rassic Park.
Empire Mike's back.
What's this big, fat Greek what?
Wedding anniversary 12.
Big fat Greek wedding anniversary 12 because it's the two of you?
It's your 12th anniversary?
Good for you.
One day at a time.
What's your, what are your names?
Edward and Tiara.
Edward and Tiara?
Tiara.
That is super exotic exotic Were you adopted?
I don't even know what that means
Were you adopted?
There's some colorful ones out there
Because house lights are down
But I see Upchuck back there
I put that one on my Instagram today
I like that one so much.
It's the movie Up, of course,
but his name is Chuck, so he changed it to Up Chuck.
And the dog and the little Asian
kid and the old man all
have really green faces like they're going to throw up.
Well, thank you to everybody for bringing those.
We'll have you whip those out
a little later.
Maybe the club,
maybe when we bring the name tags out later,
there's the house lights you can throw on so we can see them.
I mean, that'll be helpful in selecting.
Doug Pluggs.
Monday, I'm doing a Benson movie interruption
in Los Angeles of The Conjuring 2,
no subtitle, at CineFamily. They just went with Conjuring 2. No subtitle. At CineFamily.
They just went with Conjuring 2.
They didn't have to add any more.
They didn't have to throw in Conjuring
again.
More Conjuring ahead.
And then, what else have I got
coming up? Oh, Doug Lowe's Movies is
back in LA on Tuesday, October 25th
at 9.30 over at the UCB Franklin location.
And then Doug Lowe's Scary Movies is back at Cobbs in San Francisco this Thursday, October 27th at 8 p.m.
DougLowe'sMovies.com.
DougLowe'sMovies.com.
From the corrections department.
Douglowsmovies.com.
From the corrections department,
I just learned when I used to do,
what was the gambling site that I used to do?
DraftKings.
Every ad I did for DraftKings said,
DraftKings.com, that's DraftKings.com.
And they seem to make a lot of money,
so I figured that's how advertising should work.
You just say it twice every time.
From the corrections department,
Julianne Moore was Jeff Goldblum's girlfriend in Lost World Jurassic Park,
not Vince Vaughn's.
Pretty good stuff, right?
I think one person on Twitter was upset
that I got that wrong.
I think one person on Twitter was upset that I got that wrong.
And I said X, but they're actually still together,
even though she runs off and tries to photograph dinosaurs,
and he's had bad experiences with dinosaurs,
and he's like, why did you go off to photograph dinosaurs?
I told you, woman. Let's look in the prize bag. I brought lots, woman.
Let's look in the prize bag.
I brought lots of stuff.
Lots of stuff got through airport security in an Ash versus the Evil Dead tote bag.
We're going to be hearing about this particular prize a lot
in the next couple of, like, the next eight or ten episodes,
because they sent me a shit ton of them, including, in each one, they included an Ash vs. Evil Dead chainsaw foam finger.
Finally, you know the expression, fuck me gently with a chainsaw?
Somebody figured out how to do it.
A foam chainsaw.
Locker room talk.
We got an excuse to say whatever we want, guys,
for the rest of our lives.
I'm never in a locker room, so I gotta do it somewhere.
Also in the bag is a special Ash vs. Evil Dead,
I guess it's some sort of commemorative book thingy,
I should look through one of them so I can describe it better.
An apron from Sausage Party that says,
Grills Kills.
I don't know why I wouldn't just say Grills Kill,
but close enough.
Oh, Phil Bill Volume 1 comic book, coloring book.
I always call it a comic book first
and then correct myself and call it a coloring book.
So hopefully that nightmare will be over soon.
This is pretty cool, I think. I'm pretty sure.
Is this shirt, is that a Transformers
character?
It's fucking Voltron. Alright.
Does anybody recognize this fellow?
I don't know how
this just was mailed to me
somebody just sent me this book
Borat, Touristic Guidings to Minor Nation
of U.S. and A
but it's two books
because if you flip it over
the other side is Touristic Guidings to Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan
so you can learn about both places
in this book, and I don't know if he ever says
my wife in it anywhere.
But I only have one of these,
and it's heavy. It feels like it's
due back at the library.
So enjoy that.
A lot of stuff in the bag.
And whatever my guests brought.
Oh, an Ash vs. Evil Dead hat.
An Ash, oh, not Ash, but Shemp's beer. The beer An Ash vs. Evil Dead hat. An Ash, oh, not Ash, but Shemp's beer.
The beer on Ash vs. Evil Dead.
It's a koozie for that.
Ooh, here's one of those crocheted donuts I got in Boston.
Yeah, those are fun to throw at each other
because he's not messy.
A Peacemaker pipe that's only been used once.
A pack of, you gotta take their word for it,
it just says this right on there, awesome crayons.
So these must be really great crayons.
And, oh, what a surprise,
an Ash vs. Evil Dead t-shirt.
Ash vs. Evil Dead on Starz. They're very nice to
send me all this stuff.
These three people are very nice
to be guests on the show today.
My notes blew away, but I don't need them
because I know who's here.
Please give a big warm
welcome to Adam Ferreira,
Justin Robinson, and Mark Wahlberg. Yeah! Apologies to everyone on that side
that all you could see is Mark for the whole show.
It's not so bad, though.
I don't know what you yelled, sir,
but I think it had several words.
Let's meet the guests individually.
Headlining all weekend here
at the Tacoma Comedy Company.
Company?
They're right next to Rubber Stamp Company,
so you can understand my confusion.
Humor.
It's Adam Ferreira, everybody!
Thank you, Douglas.
So, okay, first question for you.
Yes.
You know that guy that plays Turtle on Entourage?
Yeah, I don't know him.
We're not related. But how do you say his name? I think you say it Jerry.
Thank you. Moving on. Okay.
You might
know Adam from his role on
Nurse Jackie program on the
Showtime Network.
There you go.
How great is that Edie Falco?
She's a sweetheart, man. It's a lot of fun to do.
I think she's on drugs. I've got to be honest with you.
So when it comes to the scripts,
you're kind of method about it?
Here's the thing.
I separated my shoulder,
and I had to do a scene where...
So I separate my shoulder, and I get the do a scene where... So I separate my shoulder,
and I get the scripts for the next season.
It says, Frank takes Jackie to a square dance.
Of course he does.
So I got a square dance.
She's the drug addict,
and I'm flying on Vicodin.
I'm chewing like they're Tic Tacs.
I'm like, come on, kick that fiddle in,
you son of a bitch, let's dance.
But you got through it?
I did, yeah.
I gotta see that episode.
I gotta just watch a new square dance.
It's already hilarious.
They shoot me from the waist up like Elvis
because it's all ugly.
I can't really move that well.
They got a square dancing place here downtown in Tacoma.
I do not think of this as like a cowboy town.
But they were all fucking in there last night
just dancing away.
Where were you? It was the something grill steer grill steel steel sit what don't yell creek
steel creek sequel to willow creek yeah she's yelling steel creek what are you ignorant we're
not from here no but it was funny that there were so many
different ideas of what it was called.
Yeah.
She had to really jump in there and give us the right one.
But yeah, I guess...
Did you dance?
I might go by there again tonight.
Hell no.
No?
I periscoped for a little while
because I wanted to show the outside world
that that sort of thing happens.
Did they have a bull?
Did they have a mechanical bull?
Yeah, they did, but it was only dudes riding it,
so that's not sexy.
Let's say hello to Justin Robinson is here, everybody.
Hey, everybody.
You may know him as Rev Enfuego
on the morning show at KISW in Seattle.
Rock of Seattle.
Yeah.
BJ and Migs mornings, absolutely.
Yeah, and you were on probably the last show up in this area, right?
In Seattle?
Yeah, up at the Neptune.
Did you win?
No, Ken Jennings, the human robot, was there.
Ken on the phone.
I meant to invite back the winner.
There's actually a sense of relief because every time I've been on he's on
And he knows everything
I don't know what you're trying to say about the gentleman
To your left and right but
If I were a Batman I'd put some
Cash on you today
I know movies
And let's also say hello to
I can't believe this is like the fourth show out of five.
It's Mark Wahlberg, everybody.
How you guys doing? You doing good?
What's up, Tuck?
You call this place Tuck?
What's up?
What did you just say?
I said, what's up, Tuck?
Oh.
I thought you shortened Tacoma to just, what's up, Tuck?
I might now. That's a badass fucking name.
What's up, you is a better question.
Why are you in Tacoma?
You guys want to know why I'm fucking here?
You're the first people to hear about this.
We're scouting locations for fear, too, motherfuckers.
Is it about...
Is your character a ghost or something?
Didn't you die in fear?
You don't know that I fucking died.
It's a Mark Wahlberg movie.
I never fucking die.
Full title.
Fear 2, colon,
rollercoaster of pain.
Wait, I thought she enjoyed
what you did to her on the rollercoaster.
That seems...
She did, but there's a lot of fucking pain that's going to be dealt out
when I find that CSI motherfucker and kill him.
Oh, yeah, William Peterson played Reese Witherspoon's father in Fear.
I don't know, the dude from Manhunter, but I'm going to fucking kill his ass.
It feels like you guys really have it out for each other.
Like, you really hate each other in that movie.
Me and William Peterson?
Yeah.
Fuck yeah, dude.
I couldn't stand his ass.
And then, you want to know the real secret?
Yes.
That car that I destroyed?
That was really his car.
And I gave it to him the day before as a gift,
just to fuck with it.
I was going to ask you why you don't work
with the same actors and directors frequently,
but now I think I know why.
They don't deserve it.
Exactly.
That is exactly why.
Let me just make sure I covered everything
I wanted to ask you guys about.
Oh!
Are any of you watching Westworld on HBO?
Yeah.
Absolutely.
You like it?
I love it.
I watched the first episode and I was like,
I can get behind this shit.
Fucking killing people and beating the fuck out of people you don't like whenever you want. I'm it. I watched the first episode and I was like, I can get behind this shit. Fucking killing people and beating the fuck out of people
you don't like whenever you want, I'm in.
So you think you're going to vacation in Westworld?
Hell yeah, dude.
Is that a possibility?
Is this a documentary?
No, but, you know,
we're almost there.
We could probably get something like that
going pretty soon. Would you do that? Would you go to an amusement park
where you'd fuck robots?
Oh, shit.
Yeah, I'll fuck a robot.
I don't care.
Didn't mean to throw a hardball at you,
and I apologize for it turning up
on Deadspin on Monday.
Well, because I figured robots would be like anybody else
I'd fuck, willing.
Yeah, remember that, gentlemen.
They have to be willing.
She gets it.
I think she just got it.
She's gonna fucking get it.
I think she just got it.
She's gonna fucking get it.
My trouble with this show is it's like they took a movie
that's a classic Westworld
where the premise is just
there's a future world, a Westworld,
and a medieval world,
and you go in there
and you just go at it with everybody
and you get to kill people
and have sex with them,
and they're just robots.
And one robot goes rogue
and starts actually killing everybody.
And it's a suspenseful movie about a rogue robot.
But they're trying to turn it into a TV series.
I don't know if it's a limited run.
I assume they want it to just go for years.
And every fucking week, they're just dropping all these surprises.
Like they're going to back themselves into one of them lost corners any day now
where none of it's going to make any sense.
They said that they're doing like five
seasons already, so I hope they have a plan.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Five seasons? Yeah, they've already said
they've mapped out five seasons, so
as long as people will watch it, they'll
put it out there. I'm not going to stop watching it.
Five years of robot fucking?
That's a lot of fucking, yeah.
They get a lot of violence in there.
Change the batteries.
There's a lot of violence in there, but change the batteries. There's a lot of violence in there,
but the idea of the show, it seems to me,
is going to be more and more
that these robots start to feel like real people
because of how they've been programmed,
and then we're supposed to feel bad for them
when they realize they're not real.
I can see it turning into some weird Matrix
sort of thing going on with it.
Yeah, who knows?
A very special Westworld.
The robot has feelings.
And then you're fucked.
Mark?
If we're gonna fucking talk about TV,
can we please talk about a real show like Wahlburgers?
Because that has violence
and tons of surprises and will be on
for definitely five fucking seasons,
so let's get into it.
Are there robots on it?
What's that?
Are there robots on Wahlburgers?
You know what? You want a fucking robot?
I saw Rocky IV.
Let's bring a fucking robot into it.
Nice.
Robots are never a good idea.
The robot is why all those kids got launched into space
in the movie Space Camp.
Joaquin Phoenix, then Leaf Phoenix.
Sweet switch to Joaquin from Leaf.
He did the right thing.
But he was a little kid,
and he had a friendly robot friend
that thought he was doing him a favor
by sending him and all the other kids out
into space. The movie didn't do
very well at the box office
because it came out
two months after the Challenger exploded.
It was real shit timing.
I'm going to be honest.
Are we in the middle of a game right now?
Yes. This game is called
Who the Fuck Knows What Space Camp Is
It had Leah Thompson
It had Tate Donovan
Do I need to go on?
Star studded this
Motherfucking movie
Alright, what was the last movie you guys saw?
Who wants to go first?
The last movie I saw, I told you backstage
Was Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory
Great choice
Gene Wilder passed away, they put it at the little theater at my house And we went and saw it, I told you backstage, was Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. Great choice. Gene Wilder passed away. They put it
at the little theater at my house, and we went
and saw it again, and it was just as good
as it was last time.
That's the last movie I saw.
That movie holds up.
I mean, especially when Gene Wilder's around.
Every minute he's on screen is
electric and fun. And he had to talk
the director into doing the opening where he did the flip,
and he had to talk him into it and he kept
it in. I still get scared when
the big German kid gets stuck in the tube.
You get scared? I always get scared.
I'm like, oh, fuck. Do you have a lot of plumbing
issues? I know. I'm like, oh, fuck.
He's got area in the face when you see this.
Oh, shit. And I'm a grown-ass man
and it still scares me.
I think the boat ride right after it's supposed to be the
scary part.
The end of that movie is the fucking best fucking thing ever.
Flying elevator?
Yeah, when he looks at the little guy and he's like,
do you know what happened to the man who got everything you ever wanted?
And then whenever that part comes on,
I go, do you know what happened to the man who got everything you ever wanted?
His name wasn't Donnie.
And then Donnie cries
and runs up to his fucking room.
I love that part.
Justin, what was the last motion picture
that you witnessed with your eyes?
I just talked about it, but it was Westworld.
That's not a motion picture, you weirdo.
What? Yeah, the old 70s one. That's not a motion picture, you weirdo. What?
Yeah, the old 70s one.
Oh, you went back and watched it?
Yeah, yeah.
Okay, see, I haven't done that.
So when I was saying that this new show isn't as fun as that movie,
you can settle that score right now.
Is the movie fun or is it kind of slow?
The movie is super slow because it's in the 70s
and it's still a Western and all Westerns are slow.
But it's still cool because
I mean. You never saw Westworld obviously.
Wild, wild
Westworld.
I saw
that one too.
Fast as fuck.
But yeah, so Westworld was
but anyway.
I don't know what just happened.
I don't either.
But Westworld was fun because it's Jurassic Park
and the Terminator all, you know, before those
were things. So you could see how those
actually brought forward all of those.
Right.
I saw a tweet where somebody wrote, they were
saying like, oh, I get it. Westworld is
just like a ripoff of Jurassic Park.
And I was like, motherfucker,
Jurassic Park was a ripoff of Westworld.
I could barely say it,
but good thing I was typing at the time
so you could stutter all you want
as long as your fingers are in control.
But yeah, I'm not completely on board
with the Westworld movie.
I mean, the Westworld movie, I haven't seen in a long time,
but when I see this TV series, I'm like,
why do they have to drag this out for season after season?
Yeah, because it's not going to be that.
It's going to be some weird different concept using the same name
as they do all the time now.
Oh, you think it's going to be like American Horror Story
where each season is a different cast, different set of that'd be kind of cool but no i just think it's gonna not be just some
weird part going crazy right so they've got to put more into it they're trying to seed all of
those different things in with it i forget what happened in future world the actual sequel to
west world i don't remember that one because all I remember, yeah, I haven't seen that one. I just remember the other two worlds were
medieval world in the movie
and then like
Roman world. Yeah, Roman world
which basically is just
an excuse to fuck.
Everyone's just banging all the time and they make no
illusion. Yeah, yeah. Roman world is just
like instead of shooting people, you have to
wrestle.
There's a lot of it.
That's not fun.
I don't want to wrestle a robot.
Mark, what about you?
What was the last motion picture you saw?
Well, the fucking TV broke on my fucking private jet on the way here.
And I got stuck watching the new and completely fucking shitty
Point Break.
It's just a fucking
GoPro commercial. Why the fuck
Did everybody see that?
Why'd you all groan? Like, you like that movie?
Okay, good.
You were agreeing with him.
It's like a collection of dudes that wish they were me
trying to make a fucking movie.
That's a tough life, wishing you were you.
The original's so much fucking better,
just on Busey alone.
I once got in a knife fight with Gary Busey.
Yeah, I once got in a fucking knife fight.
It was a butter knife fight, and it was fucking awesome.
Hey, boy, watch that knife!
What started the fight?
What's that?
What started the fight?
He was trying to eat a dinner roll, and I'm like, you don't need those fucking carbs, Gary.
Right.
And was he going for the butter?
It was the 1999 White House Correspondents Dinner and that motherfucker...
That motherfucker
kept eating these rolls and I'm like, you eat one more
fucking roll and I will butter knife fight the shit out of you.
And then Donnie was like, please don't
do it. And I'm like, Donnie, you're lucky you're even fucking here right now.
Yeah, I was pretty surprised that he got a ticket to that dinner.
Oh, my God.
Donnie fucking spent two hours trying to tell people
he could pull the tablecloth out without messing up their table.
He ruined nine fucking tables.
And then they were like,
do you know this guy?
And I'm like, nobody knows this guy.
So mean to Donnie.
It's just the facts, Jack.
You know who else is mean?
Statler and Waldorf.
I love a comedy club
that wants you just to remember
those two old puppets
and how
it's funny to tell an audience, don't heckle,
but remember these guys?
Remember how great they were at it?
You don't do it.
You're not allowed.
I saw a movie that's on,
I saw it a long time ago at a festival,
but it's on Netflix now,
and I wanted to recommend it,
and it's called Man vs. Snake.
And...
A love story?
No.
No colon, no subtitle.
It's just Man vs. Snake,
and, or actually it might have a colon
and a subtitle now that I think of it.
But check it out, Man vs. Snake and, or actually it might have a colon and a subtitle now that I think of it. But check it out, Man vs. Snake.
It's all about a guy who
set the world record on the video game
Gobbler. Nibbler.
Nibbler.
You start with Nibbler
and then if you get good, you graduate to Gobbler.
Yeah.
So yeah, the guy who's really good at Nibbler,
and it's a game that most people don't know or remember,
but it's a really fast-paced game,
but if you learn the patterns, you can be good at it.
And this guy is one of several people
who has set records by playing it for days on end.
And it's just the people in this documentary,
it's kind of like the King of Kong documentary.
It's almost like a cousin to that movie.
And it's really super fun.
And I was thinking of it today because I spent some time over at Dorky's.
Oh, nice.
The, you know, barcades are popping up everywhere,
but you guys have had one for a while,
and it's really good, because it's like,
you walk in there, if you go in there
with an idea of an old video game you want to play,
or the idea of an old pinball machine you want to play,
there's a really good chance
that that game is going to be in there.
And, you know, probably, you know,
broken with a sign on it, but...
No, everything, they keep everything working pretty well. I only had a couple
issues with a couple of the pinball games.
I had little things that didn't work right
or would shut down if I was doing too good.
But Dorky's
got into some sort of...
There was some sort of issue where people were boycotting it
a couple years ago.
Did that all blow over?
They're racist!
One guy still. they're racist!
Yeah, some sort of incident happened
where somebody said the N-word or something.
But I gotta tell you, man, I love dorkies.
I hate racism, but man, they've got a really good,
they got Funhaus in there.
They've got...
If you get a pepperoni pizza,
they cut it with little Pac-Mans,
little pepperonis into little Pac-Mans.
It's worth it for that alone.
My picture's already on the wall smoking a blunt.
That makes the racism okay.
Yeah.
That's fine.
But I read a whole article about the incident
and it sounded like it was something that was kind of blown out of proportion.
Like the owner is like a foreign guy
who just didn't know, you know,
what words to use.
No, he's a white guy.
Oh, he's white?
Yeah. I'm pretty sure he has a mullet.
I'm not 100% sure.
I mean, everything kind of fit.
But there was like a protest going on outside his place,
and it was frustrating to him,
and he started yelling at people or something.
Yeah, they were blocking traffic.
He was yelling.
Did he ever do an apology or anything?
Yeah, Facebook apology, I'm pretty sure.
Oh, that's the perfect place for it.
Yeah, it was right on there.
Totally forgiven.
Pretty sure he meant it.
If he said it on Facebook.
What are you going to do?
How old was he?
Uh, 40?
I was going to do the old people are racist excuse, but...
Not you.
It's not going to work.
Statler and Waldorf are so polite up there.
They never say a word.
They also don't look at us.
I also have to say
it's kind of charming that the club
is like, hey, look over here.
They keep a light on them the whole time.
The focus does not need to be on the comedian.
Check out
these other things. There's also a light back there
over the bar that changes color every few minutes.
If I was doing stand-up here, it would drive me nuts.
It's still gonna drive
me nuts.
Either way.
Bert Kreischer, turn off the show, because this is
the part where I say, let the games
begin!
Alright, hey, Mark, Mark, Mark, Mark.
Could you just wait until I ask you?
Gentlemen, pick your name tags.
Select who you'd like to play for.
Oh, there are the lights. Thank you, Tacoma Comedy Club. Select who you'd like to play for. Oh, they're the lights.
Thank you, Tacoma Comedy Club.
Select who you'd like to play for,
and while you do that, we'll do this.
We'll be right back.
Hey, everybody.
Today's episode is brought to you by
Your Pretty Face is Going to Hell,
an original series from Adult Swim.
It's a workplace comedy set in hell,
literal hell, where cube-dwelling
demons grapple with love, sex,
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all while having to stab some unfortunate
soul in the scrotum to the tune of
All-Star by Smash Mouth.
Is there another All-Star?
Created by Dave Willis of
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who did Too Many Cooks.
Season three premieres October 23rd at 1130 p.m. on Adult Swim,
and you can catch up on seasons one and two at adultswim.com.
It was nominated for an Emmy, but it lost to Rob Corddry.
I think it lost to Rob Corddry.
Watch it anyway.
Your pretty face is going to hell.
All right, we're back. Look at that.
A big box of donuts, courtesy of Mr. Wahlberg.
Who are you playing for, Mark?
This is a fucking hand-painted painting.
Katie and the Tramp.
And if I'm not mistaken, she put, in Lady's face,
she kind of gave her more of a human face on that dog,
like how she looks.
Is that how you look, Katie?
I like the spaghetti.
Right? Isn't that trippy?
I wish there was a Snapchat where you could take a dog
and put a person face on it.
She looks...
I'm going to be honest. No offense, Katie.
But for the listener at home,
the dog looks like it's transitioning into a lady
while having balding clown hair.
No offense.
At all.
Look at their fucking noodle, dude.
Yeah.
The noodles are marijuana cigarettes, I believe.
Yes, they are.
You can't really do that scene with a marijuana cigarette.
One of you would have to have the end that's on fire.
What do you got there, Justin?
I am Iron Dan.
Iron Dan.
Really craftsy, that one.
It's a white cardboard paper with a string of lights on it
and an Iron Man on there and then a ton of candies.
Ton of candy.
They know the way to get to the heart of the fat guy slash diabetic
is to get all of the candy.
Are you going to enjoy those candies?
I very well may.
Because I never eat anything that's been taped to something.
Nah.
It's just one of my life rules.
It's in the packaging.
I'm hedging my bets at this point.
Yeah, that's true.
Maybe I'll just save it for Halloween candy
for the kids that come around my house this year.
It would be weird if they just taped
some loose duds to something.
You definitely wouldn't eat those.
These are nice little boxes.
Tiny boxes.
Eat candy that comes from strangers. What could go wrong?
That's how that works. It's a holiday
tradition. They might have weed
in them. Does the candy have weed in them, Dan?
No.
Dan is like five people over there.
Dan is a collective.
Hey, Mark, can you just snap those J's off of there
and pass them down to me?
How can I write to him?
Yeah, because you can't pollute yourself
with that kind of thing.
I don't need it.
Yeah, you don't need performance-enhancing drugs.
Well, that's another album title for me,
Performance-Enhancing Doug. Well, that's another album title for me, Performance Enhancing Doug.
That's good.
Wow.
Thought of another one on a recent show,
Comfort Doug.
All right, so what do you got there, Adam?
I have the Darren Knight Rises with the...
I picked it because he's obviously on a budget.
And it's a nice homeless motif you went to. night rises with the... I picked it because he's obviously on a budget. And
it's a nice homeless motif
you went to.
It should say at the
bottom, can I have some change?
God bless you.
You know where it's hard to get
changes out in front of dorkies? Like where the people
coming out of there have spent all
their change, plus they're racist.
Yeah. coming out of there have spent all their change plus they're racist yeah
i was really hoping that the whole thing had blown over and everybody had a great sense of humor about it because i want to go back there tonight instead now i got to a sign, dorkies is racist, and march around.
What a shitty Saturday night I'm gonna have.
So the cardboard is taped to a, you should say, a bane mask.
Yeah, which I'm not putting on.
Yeah, the bane masks have made it to stage in the past,
and I put one on once, and I regret it.
I can smell it from here.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's shaped like a jockstrap.
It's like you're holding a rubber jockstrap.
You're going to slip that thing on, yeah.
Bane's jowls were shaped just like balls.
A hat or support.
Your choice.
Yeah, there you go.
Excellent choice.
And then we have some donuts on the stage
that Mark brought up here,
and they look very fancy.
I think they're from, is the place right here
downtown Donut House?
Or House Donuts?
House Donuts?
House Donuts is a totally
different thing. They play really intense music.
Quiet!
I'm trying to eat a donut!
So we have the donuts on the stage,
and we like to throw them into the crowd,
but I thought today it might be fun
to do it at the end of the show,
if time permits,
because the listeners probably think
that part isn't that much fun.
It's more for the live audience. We gotta do it.
Because you guys want it.
I mean, who here
does not want to get hit in the face with a donut?
Alright, you're in the front row.
You're in good shape. You'll be alright.
I'm gonna
hit you so hard.
Yeah, dude.
Doug.
Did this dude just say no?
What?
He did.
You're gonna look me in the fucking eye
and say that if Mark Wahlberg
puts something in your face,
you don't want it?
The answer is, I'm an American.
I do fucking want it.
Then you say thank you
and I don't say a fucking word.
He accepts his fate.
It's destiny, bro.
That'll be fun. At the end of the show,
each of us will pick up a donut and throw them at you
all at the same time.
And I go last
so that you're primed to handle it.
I said at the same time.
And then I'll go again last.
I thought you guys were wearing costumes up front,
but now I realize that the entire city of Tacoma
is Team Zazu.
of Tacoma is Team Zazu.
I throw a movie reference in every once in a while. It's kind of the theme of the podcast.
Alright, here we go.
Wait, Doug, prize bag?
What? Oh yeah, we don't know what these
guys brought for the prize bag. Thank you very much.
What do you got for the prize bag,
Mark? Adam is
already looking around like, what? Donuts! What, you got for the prize bag, Mark? Adam is already looking around like, what?
Fuck
Donuts
I got a DVD in the back
Yeah, you want to go grab one?
We'll talk to Mark while you go get that
I'm not going to put that on
Mark, what'd you bring?
I brought fucking treats
I brought them for two reasons. They're called
shit. They're called
Stroopwafels.
A Stroopwafel.
Yeah, it's like a Scandinavian treat.
It's like a thin, sugary
waffle. Yeah, that's the key
fucking word, sugar. So I'm not fucking
eating this shit.
And I brought two. One, because I'm not
going to eat it. And two, because neither is
Donnie. So nobody...
Neither one of us get a fucking Stroopwafel.
Now maybe you are gearing up for the
next season of Biggest Loser and you don't care about yourself.
You can enjoy these.
Did Donnie want to eat one?
No, Donnie doesn't get to eat one.
Okay.
Guess we don't need to know that You kidding me?
He might not have wanted it
Oh, bullshit
I have to hide the fucking Halloween candy
We get those mixed bags
And he digs through all the Snickers and Kit Kats
And I'm like, Donnie, I swear to fucking God
I told him, I'm like, you want to eat the Milky Ways?
I don't care, nobody likes that shit
But don't eat the fucking Snickers.
That's all you brought for the prize bag is two Stroopwafels?
He's got two Lady and the Tramp joints you can put in there.
That's true.
I brought two Stroopwafels that were touched by Mark Wahlberg.
They're fucking... Maybe you should sign one of them.
I will.
I'll sign anything.
You know what?
Win or lose,
bust a tit out,
we'll sign that shit.
And that goes for dudes
more than it goes for girls.
Well, it's easier to ride
on a man's chest.
It's a flatter surface.
Woo-hoo!
Yeah, right.
M-A-R-K.
Yeah, help him out.
Isn't it confusing that the Berg is B-E-R-G,
but the Walburgers is...
Never mind.
I guess you worked all that out.
It's no big deal.
We're golden, Dad.
What do you got for the bag, Justin?
Decide on a Halloween theme.
So start off with a
pop funko that is pinhead.
Ooh!
He's never looked cuter.
Yeah.
Pure evil.
I never like pinhead, not because he's scary,
but because I worry for him.
I worry that he's going to trip and fall down
and all those pins are going to go
further into his head. It always looked like an evil guy that ran out in the middle of
acupuncture fuck it doesn't work this shit hurts and from my own video
collection because I found him lying around the original saw so that's a real
movie I never saw saw you never see saw I saw Saw. You never see Saw? I do not see Saw.
I'm an adult. I do not see Saw.
And then the other one is called BedtimeScaries.com.
That's a movie.
Dot com is in the movie title?
It's a movie title.
I don't know if it's a working web address.
Somebody Google it.
Wait, dude, are you giving somebody a website? Pass me
that funk poppo. Yeah. What do you got there Adam? I forgot so I just grabbed
one of my DVDs from the bag. This was my Comedy Central special. This is my third
one called Funny as Hell and it's signed by Mark Wuerlberg so Mark is going to sign that for you.
I'll sign that shit it's funny as hell. I'd like to put this in the prize bag.
Thank you very much.
Thank you.
And a Bane mask I have.
That can be used as a jockstrap if needs be.
Andre the Giant's jockstrap.
I bet you that guy wants it back.
Do you want your Bane mask back?
Yeah, you signed it for me last time.
Oh, I signed it last time.
That's the same one. That's the same one that creeps you out the first time. Yeah, you signed it for me last time. Oh, I signed it last time. That's the same one.
That's the same one that creeps you out the first time.
I didn't put it on that time, though, did I?
No.
Nope.
It was in another city that I put one on.
I had already learned my lesson by the time I got to that one.
I know, you said you sanitize it three times now.
It's like fucking Beetlejuice is gonna appear.
There's a good Beetlejuice poster over there that
didn't really get seen, so I want to give him
credit. What'd you change it to?
Beetlejason.
That's cool.
What was the throw mama from the train?
I didn't see that one. Oh, there's a throw mama?
I can't see it. What does it say?
Throw mama from the Shane.
That's cool.
Wow. Shane's getting some mama action.
For the listener at home, he's holding his sign upside down.
And he doesn't know it.
He's like a dude from Stranger Things trying to promote a movie.
All right, so all of that,
that's all the stuff for the prize bag,
and thanks to everybody who brought name tags,
but these three, Dan and Katie and...
Darren.
Darren.
Come out of the shadows, Darren!
I sanitized it!
It's clean! I cleaned the shadows!
This first game we're going to play
is called Live, Die, Repeat.
People love it for no good reason.
I'm going to say the title of a motion picture.
The first one of you that repeats it back correctly wins.
Adam likes to say he's not good at these
games. I want to give him one chance.
Okay, go ahead.
I want to give him a shot here.
This is a game that I'll always
whip out when Bert Kreischer is on.
I still don't
understand what I'm supposed to do, but go ahead.
I'm going to say the title of a film. Got it.
First one of you that repeats it
back correctly
wins.
Difficulty level has
gone down since I've been on before.
It's like Ken Jennings
leaves and you just...
Doug, you ready?
I know it's coming, but you got this evil thing.
Ready for what?
It back correctly.
God damn it.
Let's fucking do this, Katie.
Let's fucking do this.
You don't score any points by being intimidating to me.
You said whoever repeats
it back correctly first wins.
I said it back correctly, motherfucker.
Let's do this.
But if the correctly part is just correctly,
all you have to say is it back,
so technically you lose.
Shit.
It back.
And then neither of us Okay, that time you won.
See, that's a good lesson
for everybody.
Resiliency.
Just keep trying.
Doesn't matter how stupid
what you're doing is.
I tell Donnie every day.
You just gotta keep doing it.
Donnie every day.
You just gotta keep doing it.
Okay, you ready?
Good.
Bless you,
sneezer in the audience.
Bless you, sneezer in the audience.
For the record,
I won. Oh, I won.
Oh, I won.
It was close.
It was like the room suddenly had an echo.
I was locked in.
All right, here we go.
This is... I don't want to say more words.
You're freaking me out, man.
I don't want to say no more words.
I don't want to say...
You got this, man.
You got this.
Keeping up with the Joneses. Keeping up with the Joneses.
Keeping up with the Joneses.
For the listener at home,
you know who won.
That was close.
Let's do another one.
Okay, go ahead.
Days of Wine and Roses.
Days of Wine and Roses.
Oh!
Seriously Keanu
Mark Lonell
I was done before you fuckers even started, bro.
All right, so Mark won that game, sort of.
Just means he gets to go first in the next game and you know keep we're working up to a difficult game I like to
think this one is not difficult at all but some guests have proven me wrong
it's time for ABCD's Nuts.
This is a spelling game where I take something that we're going to
go through letter by letter,
essentially spelling it.
And all you gotta do,
Adam,
when it's your turn, I'll tell you a letter
And you name any movie
That begins with that letter
Okay
Movies that begin with the
Begin with T
That sounds condescending
To say that to you
But for some reason
Some people don't think so
I understand
Some people think
Godfather
The Godfather
Starts with a G
Yeah
Not in this game
Okay
Not in my world
What else does he need to know? Justin and Mark Not in this game. Not in my world.
What else does he need to know?
Justin and Mark have played this before.
Alright.
So we'll start with Mark, then we'll go to Justin and then to Adam.
Oh yeah, you're right about that.
I have mixed feelings about you, but you're right.
Should I ask him what's going to happen?
Helpful slash hurtful.
If you match, because it could be a surprise when they match me.
If you match, if you say the same movie I wrote down ahead of time,
then you win the whole game automatically.
Got it.
Is that right?
He's not going to respond.
People have one time.
It's like what Mark says.
You get one.
We're going to spell,
because apparently it was filmed in Tacoma
and Pierce County.
Classic motion picture
called Three Detectives.
Nick Nolte,
Martin Short,
and some kid, right?
Everyone's like,
whatever, man.
That was shot here?
What?
Damn.
Yeah. Is there... Three fugitives? You're right. Everyone's like, whatever, man That was shot here? What? Damn Yeah
Is there...
Three fugitives?
You're right
It's not three detectives
They were virtually the opposite
Of detectives
They were fugitives
Does it really say fugitives on the paper?
Yeah.
So it's not a spelling question,
it's a reading question.
I mean, it's all written down correctly.
I just said three detectives
because sometimes you just think
of a great idea for a movie.
Nick Nolte,
Martin Short, and a little kid,
they're all detectives.
Let's shoot it in Tacoma.
Okay.
Three fugitives Tea, Mark
Any movie that begins with tea
The Godfather
I went with
The Perfect Storm.
That's right.
One of your own films.
Love the girl, but I love to fish.
I'm gonna cry.
He's sitting right there.
Justin, your letter is H.
How Stella got her groove back.
Oh.
I went with hard rain.
Hard rain.
Hard rain.
Which I don't think...
Wouldn't you just call that...
It's got to hurt.
Hail.
Hail, yeah.
Hail, starring Christian Slater.
They were right.
Hard Rain is better.
Yeah.
Your letter is R...
Adam...
Yeah, R.
Just any movie begins with R. Ransom. There you go. Mel Gibson. Mel Gibson, R. Adam. Yeah, R. Just any movie begins with R.
Ransom.
There you go.
Mel Gibson.
Mel Gibson, yeah.
Yeah.
I went with Rain of Fire.
Again with the rain.
Yeah, you seem to be noticing a theme emerging.
In the Pacific Northwest.
It's very apropos.
Maybe.
Maybe.
I can't even read this next one.
Hang on. Oh, I got it.
I got it. Okay, Mark.
My letter is E.
Yeah.
Ender's Game.
There you go.
I know I didn't win the fucking game, guys.
You're still in it, though.
That's the important thing.
I went with Eye of the Hurricane.
From 2012.
I think it's about a boxer.
Denzel was in a movie called...
Okay, anyway.
Isn't that Reuben Carter?
Reuben Carter and the rain.
Next E for Justin.
Enter the Dragon.
Ah, good one.
I went with Earthquake.
Because there's no other E movies with rain in them.
F is your letter, Adam.
Final Rain.
Now you're just making up the name of the thing?
Alright, you're out.
Final Rain sounds like a
faith-based drama that I do not want to watch.
Let it rain, Lord!
Not only did I call it Three Detectives,
looking at it now, there's several letters
that I didn't pick a movie for.
Let me just do this really quick.
Can I give you an F movie?
Let me write some things in here in these ones I didn't pick.
They won't be in the rain theme at all.
Okay, we're good.
We're good.
So we're up to F.
Oh, and you said Final Rain
That's your Final Rain answer
I have another answer
Flawless
There you go
Too bad you didn't say that first
I went with Feeling Minnesota
Again, no rain
But I'm going to be performing in Minneapolis on November 5th.
U for Mark.
U571.
Oh, that's got water in it.
I went, you got to figure there's some water here.
Underworld.
There's like a dripping wet kind of.
Yeah, there you go.
G.
Gremlins.
Ooh.
I just wrote down one
because that's one of the ones I missed.
I was kind of hoping that.
Get Smart.
Damn.
That's good.
I for Adam.
I? Mm-hmm. Oh, no. I for Adam. I for me?
Oh, no.
Inspect a gadget.
I read the book. It's fabulous.
Is it?
Yes.
I went with
Into the Storm.
Into the Storm, okay.
Into the Perfect Storm. Mark storm, okay. Into the perfect storm.
Mark T.
The life of pie.
There's some rain in there, for sure.
What are you shaking your head at?
You want to hit with a donut now?
The day after tomorrow.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh. Oh. I. Oh, ah. Mm. Oh. Ah.
Oh.
I.
Inception.
I, robot.
Ah.
Is there rain in I, robot?
I had robots on my mind.
Oh.
That's the one I just wrote down.
That's what you were talking about.
V.
V?
Yeah.
Is for?
Vendetta.
Pretty obvious answer. Yeah. Keeps you in the game
Alright
Volcano
Okay
Yeah
It rained lava
In volcano
We got two letters left
Mark E
Mark E
What? Nothing murky what?
nothing
I'm gonna go with a fucking classic
Arnold Schwarzenegger's Eraser
yeah
that's the movie where he shoots an alligator
and says, Your luggage.
And I've always been like,
I wish I had been there to help them punch that movie up,
because the line for that situation is,
See you later, alligator.
That's fucking true.
Is that the one with Tom Arnold?
What?
Is that the Tom Arnold one?
Was that the Eraser?
No, he's in True Lies.
True Lies, yeah.
I went with, for my E,
I went for Escape from the Planet of the Apes.
God damn it.
Yeah, it's kind of rainy in that movie.
Was it?
No.
No, okay.
It's really sunny every day.
Takes place in Philadelphia.
I know, that's a TV reference, not a movie reference,
so you don't have to laugh at it.
You guys are really strict.
I got it, I got it.
Who gets S?
I do.
That's you?
Big finish.
Sliver.
Try to keep with the theme of... You don't even keep finish. Sliver. Try to keep with the theme of...
You don't even keep with the theme.
I tried to keep with the theme.
What's your answer?
I'm still singing.
Sliver.
Singing in the rain.
There you go.
Nobody wins.
Congratulations.
Oh, but you know what we have enough time for?
We have enough time to pelt this gentleman in the front row.
But before we do that,
before he puts on his... Yeah, exactly.
Your name tag is not going to help you.
What was your name tag?
What was that?
Lost in Translation?
But it's me sitting on the bed instead of Bill Murray? And what does it say? The title is? was that? Lost in Translation? But it's me sitting on the bed instead of Bill Murray?
And what does it say?
The title is?
It still says Lost in Translation?
Austin.
Austin.
Translation.
Why didn't you put your face on there?
There's no reason to suck up to me.
I don't pick name tags.
I didn't know who was going to be here.
No, you did not know who was going to be here.
This is a tightly kept secret. I keep waiting for WikiLe going to be here. No, you did not know who was going to be here. This is a tightly kept secret.
I keep waiting for WikiLeaks to fuck it up.
Even if WikiLeaks got that, they can't read it.
They can't.
Do you write with your feet?
I do.
I just put a pen between my toes and I go, go, go.
All right. Let's play to two points.
So a couple rounds at least of Last Man Stanton.
Now this, compared to the other games,
you know, actually takes some effort.
Thank you.
Yeah, Adam's going to be back at 8 o'clock and 10 what's the late show 10 is it 10 10 10
yeah okay who's coming back to see him tonight do it stand up here in this very
room I knew it thank you I knew there'd be some all right so uh here's how this
game works Adam good the other fellows have played this game before I'm gonna
get the name of an actor or actress.
We're all going to take turns
naming that person's films.
And if you can't think of one, you're out.
But in each round,
your name tag
can be your lifeline.
You can go to your name tag one time.
I'm so fucked.
In each round.
I am so fucked. You know round. I am so fucked.
You know what, though?
At least it's sanitized.
Okay, yeah.
He may not know the answers,
but he gave you a clean, used mask.
Okay, cool.
I love clean, used needles
and clean, used condoms.
That's nice.
As long as you sanitize them.
I washed the condom out.
What's wrong?
Yeah.
I soaked it in hot water for over an hour.
Gets bigger
when you do that, so there's a lot to live up to.
Turns into a
magnum.
Blame it on the
rain.
I don't know what's happening
anymore. Oh, so take turns.
Use a lifeline.
First person out in the first round gets to pick the actor for the next round or actress.
Anybody you want.
You can really go strategic.
Like if I were you, Adam, I don't know.
I'm not sure I know all the movies you've been in.
So you could say your own name and kill us.
Thanks.
You can try, bro.
You can fucking try.
Okay, I gotta make one.
You can't pick your own name, Mark.
I'm not.
That's not fair.
I know.
Isn't it?
Because I'm pretty sure every fucking person has seen all my movies.
Contraband.
Fuck yeah, dude.
The one where I was the only person who brought a gun?
That was fucking awesome.
I know, especially coming hot off of Two Guns, where everybody brought a gun. That movie was fucking awesome i know especially coming hot off of two guns where everybody brought
a gun that movie was fucking good too we were in a truck running into each other it was awesome
yeah they you both spun out into each other so that you can't your your two passenger door not
passenger your driver door came right up next to each other did you high five or fist bump when
that happened fuck you know what they cut it out i go what's up dude from devil in the blue dress
and then we fucking high fives i can't? They cut it out. I go, what's up, dude from Devil in the Blue Dress? And then we fucking high-five.
I can't believe they cut that out.
That seems like a weird move.
You're like a fourth wall breaker.
I'll break anything.
A fourth wall burger.
All right.
Boo!
Boo!
Yeah, so you get to pick the name if you fall out first in a round. And I like to
play along because I don't know any of this ahead of
time. I picked somebody on Twitter
that's very confident they have a good name
for us. Where is
the TJ Squire?
Front row center!
There you go.
It often happens that way. The one I
pick is somebody that's also so gung-ho.
How early did you get here today to get that front row seat?
Second in line.
Behind the guy with that.
I met you out front earlier.
I came by at 2 o'clock to do sound check.
He's sitting out front masturbating.
And I was like, what are you doing?
And he's like, sanitizing this mask LRT
locker room talk
alright dude
what's your real name TJ
oh sorry I'm still talking All right, dude. What's your real name, TJ?
Oh, sorry.
I'm still talking to the... Still talking to the Bane mask over there.
Jeff Goldblum, because it's his birthday.
It's Jeff Goldblum's birthday today?
Okay.
I think he leans right into it
and goes full Goldblum.
But you can never be absolutely sure.
So Mark won the last game where there was a winner,
which was just saying back Keanu the fastest.
Crushed it.
Yeah.
So you get to go first, and then I'll go,
then Adam, then Justin, and in that order.
If you can't think of one, you're out.
But don't forget about your lifeline, which you could use at any point.
The films of Jeff Gloomenberg, Goldbloom, Steen, Meyer.
It's Mr. Rosen Rosen.
Go, Mark.
Jurassic Park
That's crazy that you were able to think of that
With a Jurassic Park poster sitting right in front of you
Justin
Independence Day
Oh did I say I was going to go second
Yeah
Fuck it
No you know what I gonna go second? Yeah. Fuck it. No, you know what? I should go second.
Independence Day.
What?
That's all I got, man.
I'm just joking around.
It's cool.
Adam?
The Fly?
Mm-hmm.
I'm gonna say Earth Girls Are Easy.
Independence Day Resurgence.
Independence Day resurgence You're so proud of yourself
Remembering that insurgence part
Fucking A dude
I've been working on my extra title words
Subtitles?
Shit I gotta do all the subtitles in the movie?
I only saw it once Do they have subtitles in the movie? I only saw it once.
Do they have subtitles
in the Independence Day movies?
I think it's all just Americans
fighting the aliens.
The way it should be.
The way it fucking should be.
Justin?
You too, huh?
Yeah, I got nothing.
I was just wondering what Sadler and Waldorf were thinking.
These are the stupidest people I've ever seen.
Oh yeah, you've never looked at your own dick.
Why are you yelling stuff?
Don't yell stuff, but lifeline.
Use your lifeline.
Lifeline, Dan.
Big chill.
This is the big chill.
Thank you, Dan Good one
Adam, do you have another Jeff Goldblum
or do you have to go to your
Lifey Life
It was a play I saw him in
Oh, you saw him in a play, Pillow Man
Yeah, but that doesn't count
Was it good?
I fell asleep
Pillow Man, get it?
Yeah, that was it
What? Was it good? I fell asleep. Pillow man, get it? Yeah, that was it.
What?
I can't hear you.
Life Aquatic.
What's the full title?
What's the full title?
The Life Aquatic?
There are literally 19 people saying the fucking title.
What?
Say that.
Please repeat that.
The Life Aquatic with what?
Ha-ha.
The Life Aquatic with Steve Sisu.
Yeah, close enough.
Close enough. Sisu. Satic with Steve Sisu. Yeah, close enough. Close enough.
Sisu!
Sisu!
Steve Sisu!
I didn't want to make him angry.
I don't know what he's capable of.
I mean, I made a joke earlier about how they look like they're from...
that they are Team Sisu.
And we're sitting around wondering how it's pronounced.
All right. Good job how it's pronounced. Alright, good job.
Stevie Zeezy.
Which is what I call Steve Renazeezy.
Stevie Zeezy.
I'm gonna go with
for Mr. Jeff Goldblum.
He has one line
in a motion picture, and it's
I forgot my mantra
and it's called
Annie Hall.
Oh, okay.
What?
Fuck.
What is the name of this fucking movie? Fuck.
What is the name of this fucking movie?
Katie, I might have to go to you.
Go to Katie for now.
You might be able to come back later.
There might be a movie that has a sequel that comes up or something.
You never know what's going to remind you
of a possible answer.
It's that movie where he seems like...
What do you have, Katie?
Holy Man. Holy Man.
Holy Man. Interesting.
See, that helped me
to think of another shitty comedy he was in.
I'm very excited
that I thought of it. Alright, so
you're good, Mark. I guess, because I
thought of that title the moment she fucking started
talking. But still, I love you, Katie. I guess, because I thought of that title the moment she fucking started talking.
But still, I love you, Katie.
Way to fucking go.
All right, Justin's the only one who hasn't used his lifeline yet.
I totally used it.
Why can't you just let me
give you the break that you deserve?
I'm trying to make you...
This is a rigged competition.
All right, so everybody's used their lifeline.
Yep.
Go ahead, Justin.
I haven't seen it in a while,
and I really think he's actually in it,
so I'm kind of hoping.
He should be if he's not.
Exactly.
What movie doesn't need a little Goldblum?
The Warriors?
The Warriors?
No, I thought maybe it was like a young Jeff Goldblum.
You're out.
He was in the Warriors.
You're out.
I don't know.
That's why I said I wasn't sure.
I thought maybe.
You're sure he's not in the Warriors?
I'm not sure he's not in the Warriors.
Get out.
Stop it.
JFK would have been a better guess.
Yeah, what are you doing?
JFK.
Yeah.
No.
Shit.
Was he in Shark Tale? No, he wasn't in fucking shark oh you testing some answers no I got nothing
you got nothing I got I'm tapping I got I got nothing I'm trying to all right
else he's been the one I go back to him again all right well Justin fell out
first so he gets to pick the next round. But I'm going to go with the one I thought of when Holy Man came up.
It's a Hugh Grant vehicle where he was his best friend called Nine Months.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, okay.
Yeah.
I forgot you're good at this shit.
Mark?
The Grand Budapest Hotel.
Yeah.
You're here. Mark? The Grand Budapest Hotel. Real hand.
I really thought he was the Warriors.
No, you didn't.
You guys are going to kill yourself. Hang on, I still have another.
It's a gang movie he was Cyrus they shot Cyrus all right it's my turn and I'm going to say while looking to see if you guys kick Kick yourselves. Jurassic Park, The Lost World.
I flipped them?
Alright.
I hear you.
Mark?
Was he and... You can do this.
Fuck.
Are you going to say Silverado?
No, I don't...
When I have a microphone...
There's always somebody that gets too excited,
doesn't understand how game shows work.
Right.
I'm up here, you're down there.
You don't get to talk to me.
Here we go.
Was he in Royal Tenenbaums?
I don't think so.
God damn it.
You still win this game anyway,
because you lasted the longest.
Thank you very much.
Yeah, I fucked up the Jurassic Park thing.
He was in a thing called Mr. North, I think.
Yep. And what else did we miss? He was in a thing called Mr. North, I think.
Yep.
And what else did we miss?
We missed a lot.
Buckaroo Bonza, yeah.
Buckaroo Bonza and his adventures across the eighth dimension.
Oh, Transylvania 6500.
Earth Girls Are Easy! I. Earth Girls Are Easy!
I said Earth Girls Are Easy!
The Fly!
Shut up. I said The Fly.
Invasion of the Bicentenaries.
That was a good, that was one of my favorite
versions of that, yeah.
He's in Tim and Eric's
Billion Dollar Movie? That's funny.
I never saw
that because Tim and Eric movies,
every other image
makes me want to wish
I'd never started watching.
They have the creepiest
imagery in their stuff.
All right, well,
I think we all did
a great job on Jeff Goldblum.
Congratulations to everybody.
But Mark wins that round
And we're playing at two points
And we've got 15 minutes to play with
Of course, donut tossing will occur
As soon as we're done
What's that? You okay?
Oh, she wants
People always start asking for Mark to do some lines
But we're on a tight schedule right now
Lines and donuts will be time permitting at the end.
All right, so Mark won that round.
So Justin gets to pick any actor or actress
because he fell out first.
So we were talking about Westworld,
but then Mark said Wild Westworld.
So I was thinking Will Smith.
All right.
Nobody needs to do anything tomorrow right
we're going to be here all fucking night
this is a speed round
just to get through this
because Will Smith
who doesn't know every Will Smith movie
I just
thought of one I can't remember the title of.
All right, so we'll go Justin, Mark, me, Adam.
Go, Justin.
Men in Black.
Don't forget about your lifeline.
You said Men in Black?
Yes, I did.
Wild, wild west.
I'll go Men in Black 2.
Independence Day.
Concussion.
The Legend of Bagger Vance.
Men in Black 3.
Six Degrees Separation.
Woo.
Woo.
iRobot.
Ali.
No.
I'm Legend.
Ah, you're another fuck.
Oh, shit.
I'm not going back there yet.
You can do it.
I know.
Come on.
I'm going.
Happy?
There's no reason for you to kill yourself over this.
Happiness?
Do you want to use your lifeline?
Yeah.
Brother man.
What do you got, dude?
The pursuit of happiness.
The pursuit of happiness.
I was close.
The pursuit of happiness.
Yeah, I was close.
And how is happiness spelled?
Be with an H?
Yeah, with an H.
With an H?
They spell it wrong with an H, happiness.
They do?
In the title, yes.
I understand.
Yeah.
It's a visual joke on an audio medium.
Absolutely.
Okay.
So is having name tags.
That's true.
And donuts.
But at least they're sanitized.
Where are we at, Justin?
Yeah, after Earth.
Oh, yeah.
After Earth? After Earth. Not Yeah, after Earth. Oh, yeah. After Earth?
After Earth.
Not Earth, you guys.
Come on.
Mark?
Bad Boys.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Thank you for that.
Bad Boys 2.
Ah, fuck you, too.
Back to you, Adam.
You used your lifeline.
I did. It's looking grim.
I don't know if we said any ones that have a sequel.
But if you just concentrate,
if you just
try to hone in on
you just
pretend there's an eye chart in front of you
and just really look at it
and Just pretend there's an eye chart in front of you and just really look at it.
And... Three, two, one.
Okay, Adam's out.
For this round, he could come back.
We're playing to two points.
Justin.
Focus.
Correct.
Yay.
Mark. You're out? Correct. Yay. Mark.
You're out?
No.
I said focus.
No, you said focus.
Oh, fuck.
Okay.
Lifeline.
Katie.
Sharktail.
Sharktail.
That already came up earlier, didn't it, Adam?
Wow.
Wasn't it you that said it?
It was me.
Yeah.
Making fun of my warriors.
That's what happens.
It's true.
That's what happens.
It's my fault.
I'm going to go with Suicide Squad.
Oh, very good.
Justin?
Lifeline.
Dan?
Hitch.
Hitch.
Fucking Hitch.
Fucking Hitch, dude.
Fucking Hitch. Hitch. Fucking hitch. Fucking hitch, dude. Fucking hitch.
Mark?
Oh, fuck me.
You can do this, Mark.
Just stop yelling things, side-balk.
It's a yappy side-balk.
YSB.
Yeah, you know me.
Mark!
Time is up.
I'm out.
Do you want to know why I'm out?
Two reasons. One, I don't cheat, motherfucker.
Did somebody try to give you one over there?
Yes, they did
Don't try that, you guys
And two
Oh, wait, what?
The other reason is
I can't dominate this whole fucking game
We gotta let some other people get in on this shit
That's a good point
Alright
My turn, Hancock
Damn it!
Anything else, Justin?
Nothing.
Made in America?
That's the fucking movie I was trying to think of.
With Ted Danson and Whoopi Goldberg?
Fuck.
And what else did we miss, you guys?
Right.
Oh, Seven P pounds, yeah.
Who was in that?
We said six degrees of separation.
Anchorman 2 is good.
Enemy of State is good.
Yeah.
Jersey Girl.
That's right.
What?
Jersey Girl.
Warrior.
We said Ali. Warriors. Warriors. Oh, what's right. What? Jersey Girl. The Warriors. We said Ali.
Warriors.
Warriors.
Oh, what's the one where,
oh, what's that fucking,
what's that Russell Crowe movie where he plays the devil?
The, no, The Water Diviner or?
Fresh Prince the Reckoning.
Not Fresh Prince the Reckoning, sir,
but you definitely win best guess.
It's the water something.
Winter's Tale.
Water's Tale.
Winter's Tale.
All right, well, we did a pretty good job with Will Smith,
but we still got to have a winner
because now Justin has one point,
and so does Mark,
and Adam gets to pick
the actor or actress that we play next. one point, and so does Mark. And Adam gets to pick the
actor or actress
that we play next. There's a
suggestion from the audience. Sandra
Bullock. Oh,
no. God damn it.
We gotta go super speed round.
We're going over time.
Alright, no. Let's go the opposite direction.
So it'll go Adam, me, Mark, Justin, Sandy B.
Go, Adam.
Speed.
Okay, speed to cruise control.
Mark.
Gravity.
Justin.
The blind side.
Mm-hmm, Adam.
Hope floats.
The proposal.
Then that.
Ooh, nice. That was good. Oh, I got. Then that. Ooh, nice.
Oh, I got a good one.
Justin?
Lifeline?
He knows it.
Don't cough.
Lifeline, Dan, save me.
Don't cough answers.
Miscongeniality.
Nice.
Oh shit, I can see the movie.
I can't remember the title.
Fuck, I can see it right now.
And I started this shit.
Fuck me.
Yeah, yeah.
It was your idea, man.
I know.
What do you got?
I got a lifeline.
Do it.
Lifeline.
The Heat.
That's the one.
The Heat.
Yes, very good.
The Heat.
That's the one I was thinking.
Thank you.
Nicely done.
I'll go Love Potion number nine.
Mark.
Miss Congeniality 2.
Yeah, take down of it again.
Full title.
Oh, fuck that then.
I ain't going no full title.
Two weeks notice.
It was called Miss Congeniality 2, two weeks notice?
Little redundant. great fucking movie.
I am leaving this goddamn beauty pageant in two weeks.
All right, please settle down with your audience answers
because we've really got to keep it to just us on stage.
Justin?
28 days.
Mm-hmm.
She was chased by zombies.
This is a prequel. And then they did 28 Days Later
where she had to go into rehab again.
What do you got, Adam?
By sea?
So close.
What is it?
Just say it right, man.
Less words.
By sea?
Brad and Angelina did By the Sea,
which is just a movie about how they're about to break up.
It's not two by sea?
Two.
Two if.
Two if by.
It's close enough.
You're good.
I think it's called two by sea or two by sea.
Two by sea, is that it?
I think so.
Two by Sea.
But just so you knew,
it was Dennis Leary.
I know you know
what you're talking about.
Yeah, okay.
All right.
My turn, my turn, my turn.
Oh, as long as we're doing
Bodies of Water,
The Lake House.
That's good.
Practical Magic?
Mm-hmm.
All About Steve.
Oh.
Good pull.
That movie sucks shit.
Oh, shit, I can still see the movie.
What the fuck is the title of that movie?
She's with Matthew McConaughey.
They're in the South.
It's hot.
She's sweaty.
She's sweaty?
Yeah.
She's really sweaty in that one. She's sweaty. It's sweaty? Yeah. She's really sweaty in that one.
She's sweaty. It's a trial.
They're trying to figure it out.
Let him figure it out.
That's right. Let him squirm.
Yeah, squirm it up, dude.
Oh, shit.
I gotta move on.
All right.
Yeah. You out?
I'm gonna kick myself.
Yeah, you're out. Okay.
Guys, I really don't have a time to kill.
That was it.
Doug, drop that fucking mic, Doug.
Drop.
That was it.
Okay, Doug.
You're welcome.
Thank you.
Mark. Katie, let's do this. The net Doug. You're welcome. Thank you. Mark.
Katie, let's do this.
The net.
We said the net.
I'm the one who fucking said the net.
He even said it.
Forces of nature.
Forces of nature.
Okay.
You got to say it properly.
Forces of nature?
That's right.
It had a question mark at the end.
This is for all the bananas,
Mark.
You know I like a precise title.
Is that all you fucking know, Katie?
Or are you the tramp
in this fucking sign?
I believe in you.
I believe in you.
The forces of nature? Sorry, no. You're out. I believe in you. I believe in you.
The forces of nature?
Sorry, no.
You're out.
That's when I trust a normal person.
Justin?
I don't have anything, so force of nature? That's correct.
Yeah!
Thank God.
Justin's our winner.
What did we miss?
While you were sleeping.
While you were sleeping.
That's a big one.
Demolition Man.
We said The Heat.
Speed and Speed 2 we said.
Crash.
We should have thought of Crash when we were saying speed.
She's in the traveling pants?
Oh, the ya-ya sisterhood.
I get those sisterhoods mixed up.
I'm like, is there pants or a ya-ya?
Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood.
Yeah, that's a title that says,
men stay the fuck away.
It is a great movie, though, you're right.
There's no pants in it at all.
Bushes out all the time.
I'm like, yeah, yeah.
Sister.
Dan, come get your prizes.
Congratulations.
I managed to get all of them actually into this bag.
Where's Dan at?
That's a very nice bag.
There he is.
Yeah, it all fit in there,
but it's quite, quite
chuck-champ-ful.
Yeah, it all fit in there,
but it's quite chuck-champ-ful.
Jesus.
Do you want your name tag back, Dan?
Sweet, I can keep it.
I get that fucking candy.
Yeah, you can keep all that candy.
Whoa!
I totally missed the candy.
It was a gag.
Wouldn't have been that big a deal if I smashed it anyway. It still tastes
the same. That's what my dad used to tell me
when he smashed
my candy.
What do you got to plug there, Adam?
What's coming up for you?
I am here this week. I'm at the DC Improv
next week.
And where am I after that? And the tour schedule
is on adamferrara.com.
Thank you guys for having me. I had a good time.
Yeah, you were awesome.
You've got a
Sunday night show here.
Oh, I'm in Spokane, yeah.
Oh, in Spokane on Sunday.
I'm in Spokane, son. I'm here tonight and I'm in Spokane on Sunday.
Oh, I see. Okay.
Good luck, somebody says over there
very sarcastically. Spokane on Sunday. Oh, I see. Okay. Which I found... What? Good luck, somebody says over there very sarcastically.
I know.
I've never been.
Spokane, good luck.
I've never been.
This is like...
It's really kind of nice here.
It's like kind of weedy.
You know?
It's kind of opiate vibe here.
And in Spokane,
I heard it's kind of meth-y.
So that's kind of scary.
Yeah, they don't clean up
after themselves.
It's really meth-y.
Yeah.
Very meth-y.
They should sanitize in Spokane,
from what I hear.
But here's like a nice...
This vibe here is like,
dude, in Spokane,
I'm just guessing,
it's like, dude!
I still have a good time there.
You didn't put a shithead
on the back of your shit.
Oh, he wrote it down.
Oh, good for him.
Oh, that is a good one.
Good for you, man.
You're taking a stand on this one.
I like it.
Justin, what can we plug for you, buddy?
Monday through Friday, 6 a.m. to 10 a.m. on KISW's BJ and Mick's Mornings.
You can find it
if you're not around here
on KISW.com
or our KISW app.
And also,
I do a geeky podcast
four days a week
because I hate Tuesdays.
BJGeekNation.com.
And Mark, I know you don't have anything to plug. You got Deepwater Horizon out in theaters now. and Mark
I know you don't have anything to plug
you got Deepwater Horizon out in theaters now
we got Patriot State coming out
that's going to be a great fucking movie that people should go see
Wahlburgers is still on fucking TV
and to the girl who helped me cheat
you're a liar but you took a chance
so I will make out with you after the show
you want to throw a donut?
I'm going to throw a fucking donut.
Throw a fucking donut.
Yay!
Who wants a shit?
Donut throwing.
Hurry, we got to wrap it up.
The person with the phone.
Overhand fastball donut.
Sorry.
Thank you very much, you guys.
One more time for all my guests.
Adam Ferreira,
Justin Robinson,
a.k.a. Raven Fuego,
and Mark Wahlberg.
Doug Loves Movies is going to be at the Now Hear This Festival podcast festival in Anaheim
October 29th and as always
thank you
to Tacoma Comedy Club
if they'll have us again with our messy donuts
we will be back
and as always
menstrual cramps are a shithead We will be back. And as always,
menstrual cramps are a shithead.
Yeah, get a picture of me saying it.
No photography allowed in the showroom.
People that abuse animals are a shithead.