Doug Loves Movies - Airport with Graham Elwood
Episode Date: October 14, 2011Doug is joined by Graham Elwood in the Columbia, SC airport because they got stuck there. So why not tape a podcast?See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Noti...ce at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming babies, sticky seeds with 50 azipop or kernels in his teeth.
There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug loves movies!
Hey everybody, my name is Doug, and I love movies.
This is Doug Loves Movies, coming to you from an airport on Thursday, October 13th to Ocean's Eleven.
Because the skies aren't so friendly this Cocktober day.
With me is Graham Elwood.
What airport is this and why are we stuck here?
First of all, that was great poetry that you wrote to start this episode.
We're in beautiful Columbia Regional something or other,
South Carolina Airport.
Go, Cox.
Yeah, we're supposed to fly through Chicago,
and I don't know if that's going to happen.
So it's a wonderful day of eating.
I had probably the smallest tuna wrap in the history of food.
That was a tuna wrap bite.
Yeah, a little tuna wrap nibbler that they made here in the history of food. It was a tuna wrap bite. Yeah, a little tuna wrap nibbler
that they made here in the food court.
The food court consists of
ice cream and brats
and tuna wrap
pocket-sized, fun-sized
tuna wraps.
Yeah, and it's too early to drink, so it's a complete
bummer. And we got here
our flight was supposed to go at 9,
so we got here around eight this
morning yes and now it's 12 30 yeah so but instead of bellyaching about being stuck in an airport all
day i decided to record a podcast let's do it let's make some magic we're both we're both fans
of the cinema doug last night we did a show The reason we're here in the first place,
God damn it,
is we did a show last night at the University of South Carolina.
And since their mascot is a game cock,
there was a lot of cock talk during the show.
Oh, yeah, they would just constantly yell out,
Go Cocks!
And it was actually pretty funny.
They yelled some stuff out sort of perfectly timed during one of my comedy routines
it was good so uh that's been my hashtag throughout the day on twitter is go cocks
yeah that's so hilarious to me that their mascot is the game cocks uh so we didn't play leonard
malton game with them because there was like five podcast listeners and a crowd of 650 students
so they would have been totally baffled by it. Plus, also, probably most of the movies I pick
were made before the students were even born.
But it was a super fun show.
Had a great time.
And you can get a chance to play
the Leonard Maltin game versus Graham Elwood
in Vancouver at the Comedy Mix
on Thursday, October 27th, 2 Oceans 11.
Some guy told me on Twitter that he laughs October 27th, 2 Oceans 11. Some guy told me on Twitter
that he laughs every time I say 2 Oceans 11.
So he's already gotten two solid
chuckles out of this episode.
We're going to be
at the Neptune Theater in Seattle on October
28th. The Punchline in San Francisco
October 29th at 420.
The Sacramento Punchline
on October 30th at 420.
All of those shows, we will play a little intermodal game
and dress up as, since it's Halloween weekend,
you should wear a costume.
Be dressed, make your name tag your entire outfit
and make it either your favorite movie character
or a movie character who shares your name
or a movie character you think Graham Elwood might like
because then Graham will pick his favorites to play the game against.
Yeah, dress up like me in Afghanistan.
Wear a Cubs shirt and have a
Mac Davis haircut and start
crying and I'll pick you.
I think pretty much anybody in a Mac Davis
t-shirt is going to be crying.
No, I meant
my hair was really long then
so I look like Mac Davis.
Oh, and you had a t-shirt on.
Yeah.
I thought you meant you had a Mac Davis t-shirt.
I was wearing a Cubs shirt.
I was wearing several different Cubs jerseys throughout that run in Afghanistan.
And who knows, if you play against Graham, you might win a copy of his CD.
Comedian's got a boo, boo.
Hashtag Cocktober.
And
coming up in Blovember, you can play
You idiot. You can play against
Graham. Somebody said that on Twitter.
You can play against Graham in
Flagstaff, Arizona.
Phoenix, which is also in Arizona.
And San Diego are all happening in
Bluevember.
Bluevember.
Dates and links for tickets are available at DouglasMovies.com.
Now, since last we spoke, I haven't been to the cinema,
but Graham, you've been to see a couple of movies
that I'm actually looking forward to seeing
and haven't gotten around to yet.
Yeah, I saw 50 saw 50 50 which is really
good um you know there's going into the movie i was like oh i still was kind of uh had some ptsd
from green hornet with seth rogan but uh he's he's really good in it and jason gordon or joseph
gordon levitt is great all the supporting cast it's a it's a really cool movie it's very moving
and and uh you know,
it didn't do a lot
of the stereotypical stuff
that a lot of cancer movies do
where, like,
there's some angelic friend
that comes in and saves the day
or the lead character's like,
oh, I'm just going to
cherish every sunset.
It was like,
everyone's kind of
clunking through this,
how to deal with
this really difficult thing.
It was great.
Or, like, an hour in, you find out, oh, it's false alarm.
Doesn't have cancer at all.
Yeah, that's so bogus.
Not that big of a deal.
No, he's fine.
Now we're going to tell some other story for the rest of the movie.
At least I learned how to kite surf.
Yeah, it's really cool.
Everyone in it is excellent.
Anna Kendrick's excellent.
And Philip Baker Hall's got a small little part of it.
That's great.
Angelica Houston.
Everybody's really good.
All right.
No more spoilers.
He shaves his head.
I ruined it.
See, I had a feeling that people are not going to the movie
just because they put the cancer so front and center.
But what else are they going to do?
I mean, you can't really sell it as a movie about anything else.
Yeah, they should.
I mean, you know, really sell it as a movie about anything else. Yeah, they should. I mean, you know, it's a really good movie,
and how everyone kind of handles it and the mistakes they make,
I thought it was really real and compelling and like,
well, this is maybe how me and my knucklehead buddies would have to deal with this
and my crazy family members and everyone's heart's in the right place,
but how do you deal with this?
And it's really good.
It's worth seeing, man.
Don't be scared away by cancer
and head shavings.
I'm not scared unless...
Can you get cancer watching it?
Yes. Do I have to shave my head to watch it?
Is it like 3D glasses?
I did. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe I shouldn't have done that.
But I shaved my head.
The other one is
Ides of March.
I'm a huge fan of George Clooney when yeah again this is I'm a huge fan
of George Clooney
when he directs
I'm a huge fan
of him anyway
so if you like
George Clooney
directing movies
I think you'll like this
and it starts out
sort of
what you think
is going to be
sort of
cliched
political stuff
and it goes
in some different
directions
and again
they're all
amazing actors
and he
as an actor
so knows how
to direct actors.
And there's some great close-ups and one-on-one scenes between Ryan Gosling and Philip Seymour Hoffman and Paul Giamatti.
And even Marissa Tomei, she's got a great part in there.
It's a good film.
No nudity from her, though, in this one?
No, you just see Ryan Gosling's
shaved head.
Oh, I should mention that due to
these delays that we're encountering,
I'm supposed to be in Chicago
tomorrow, actually,
and was going to go back to L.A. to do
Douglas' movie
Interruption at Cinefamily.
I'm showing
Fright Night, the original Fright Night
and with some great
guests, Rob Hubel
Paul F. Tompkins and
no, not Tompkins, he did the last one
Paul Scheer, two thirds of Human Giant
and then
T.J. Miller is going to be there
so I may have to call him up
and have one of those guys hosted
and not be there for the Benson movie interruption.
So it'll still happen without me, but, you know,
that'll suck if I can't make it.
Yeah, me too.
I'm also missing a press screening of Money Call,
which is supposed to be maybe an Oscar contender with Kevin Spacey,
and I was going to be able to get an early review.
Did you really just call it Money Call?
Margin Call.
Money Call. It's the prequel
to Moneyball.
First you have to make the Money Call,
then you play the Moneyball.
Then get out your bat.
No, it's called Margin Call.
It's about the financial meltdown in 2008.
I was excited to go because
I know there's some comedy film so i was excited to go because uh if there i know there's
some comedy film nerd fans that listen to this because getting advanced ratings means we get
the reviewers reviews up before the movies come out and we can talk about it on our podcast before
it comes out but i don't think that's happening because i will be in stuck in o'hare airport
this is a super tragic day in the world of cinema film fans are mourning yeah but if you're in the world of cinema. Film fans are mourning. Yeah. But if you're in the New York City
area on Sunday, October 23rd,
barring any flying
problems, you can see me at the
Gramercy Theater for a Benson
Interruption podcast taping at 420,
and then a Douglas Movies taping
at 8 o'clock. Or both.
You know, go to both if you want.
And then I've got some great
guests lined up for those shows, so
I hope they don't
cancel. It's Sunday,
October 23rd. You had some
other thing you were working on?
Yeah, we were gonna do
that's not our flight they're talking about.
Blah, blah, blah.
Late.
Everything's delayed today.
Yeah, there's rain in one part of the country,
Chicago, and it's
sounds like it's fucking up everybody's day.
The whole world is done.
Yeah, see, listen to this mope run his
yap about it.
Oh, and they never make the announcement short, so I was like,
and they might make an announcement
in a little while,
but then, so stay near the
gate, and it's terrible it's terrible i
mean there's much a lot of people have much bigger problems than us but yeah it still sucks yeah it's
a drag but we're all right dude we'll get through it shall we play a game shall we play a game let's
do it let's play a little build a title since we're in south car. I figured let's do motion pictures that take place in Georgia.
What's taking place in this state?
Or filmed. Set in or filmed in South Carolina.
I don't know if these movies are...
Oh, aren't they lucky.
They got their final boarding call.
Oh, there's birds in here too.
A couple of crazy rogue birds got into the tiny airport.
Birds in the terminal.
Let's do Cold Mountain.
Oh, Cold Mountain.
Okay.
Yeah, go.
Cold Mountain.
Ends in cold or starts in mountain
okay thank you
I always do the research to make sure
that there are possibilities on both ends
I'm like the
I'm like the mad doctor
in human centipede
possibilities on both ends
this game is like human centipede
it's still like being sewn
to another
but with words and you don't get any shit in your mouth.
I beg to disagree.
I beg to differ.
Okay, Colder Mountain.
Wow, I'm totally blanking on this.
Mountain...
Don't look at what I wrote down
I always write down what I think you might say
oh I'm not looking at that
mountain
mountain view
mountain view terrace
is that the name of that movie with Sam Jackson as the bad neighbor
oh lake view terrace
that movie is so horrible
with the guy from the watchman who's good as night owl in the watchman but not good in that movie Oh, Lakeview Terrace. That movie's so horrible.
With the guy from The Watchmen,
who's good as Night Owl in The Watchmen,
but not good in that movie.
He's got a TV show, that Patrick Wilson guy.
And what's her name?
Washington?
Or Kimberly... Carrie Washington?
Oh, she's adorable.
She's so beautiful.
All right, let's try to hook that up, listeners.
Get Graham some of that Carrie Washington.
All right, I'll get it going.
The great Zach Galifianakis comedy, Out Cold.
Oh, yes, the snowboarding thing with Lee Majors.
Blowout.
Blow Out Cold Mountain.
If Big Jay Hollingsworth were playing,
he would try to suggest that Blow is also the name of a movie.
Like, that would suffice as his turn.
Yeah.
But he's not, and I am.
But I still can't think of any movies that end in the word Blow.
So, on the other end mountain men which one is that
some movie i use it all the time and i can't i was trying to think of who's in it and i couldn't
remember should i look it up yeah because it's uh yeah it's an actual movie called mountain men
to come out in the 70s i I don't know if my IMDB
is going to work in the airport
though
it feels like it came out in the 70s
no
you know
it's probably one of those ones
where there's
you know
multiple things called Mountain Men
but let's see
it was like
you know
I think it was like
a buddy picture
like two dudes
that are in the mountains
called Mountain Men but I think it was like a buddy picture, like two dudes that are in the mountains.
They're called Mountain Men.
But I think that's the only movie I could think of that starts in mountain.
Mountains.
Mountains of something.
Mountain.
Like a volcano movie or something.
It's searching, but it's not looking good.
Hey guys, producer Matt Belknap here.
Mountain Men stars Charlton Heston and Brian Keith, and it came out in 1980.
So let's come back to that.
This is a reminder to keep your baggage
and carry on items with you.
Don't forget to keep your items with you.
Do you have your items with you, Graham?
I do have all of my items with you, buddy.
I've got my Mac Davis t-shirt. Do you have your Gamecock you, Graham? I do have all of my items with you, buddy. I've got my Mac Davis t-shirt.
Do you have your Gamecock?
I've got my Gamecock for shizzle.
Get your Gamecock on. Oh, network error.
Request timed out. My phone is working
like shit in this airport.
So I don't think I'm going to be able to look this up.
Oh, you know what? I can jump on the
internet. I trust your judgment.
Alright. Well, then you need a movie that begins
in men. Or ends in blow.
Yeah.
Which would be Scarface ended in blow, right?
Big mountain
of it.
It's a thug.
Yeah, Mountain Men was about dudes with mountains of cocaine
on their desk. Right!
It's a sequel to Scarface.
It's a sequel to Scarface 2.
Say hello to my little Gamecock.
Jackalope.
See, folks, this is the torture,
is being stuck in an airport with your dumb buddy.
Men.
Men.
There's a million movies named Men.
Why is this?
Men something, yeah.
Men.
Mentor.
Pretend you're...
No.
Just use the word men men men blank men run
men
mentor mentor you're just having trouble thinking because you're tired I'm so tired and that fucking tune to rap was so stupid
um
men
I know everyone listening to this is screaming
like their windows are breaking
well it's funny that you should say that because
on Tuesday night's show at UCB
Sarah Silverman
sat and mulled it over forever
before finally when I thought she's never going to come up with it,
she suddenly blurted out,
Men Don't Leave was the answer in a Leonard Maltin game.
So let's go with that now.
Men Don't Leave.
Now you can start with Leave.
Does that make it easier for you?
Leave the kids behind.
That's a movie?
You just keep making up things.
Leave.
Academy Award nominated movie
that starts with the word leave.
It's half of the first word.
Oh.
Leave.
Leaving.
Leaving Las Vegas. Come on. Finally. leave um leaving leaving las vegas
finally i'm sorry this is a really horrible display this is not me at my best vegas vacation
um vegas vacation blow out cold mountain man, don't leave Las Vegas Vacation.
Okay.
Um,
Vacation Man.
I was trying to tag on Rashomon, the Curacao movie,
but that was so,
that was such a thin.
That doesn't work.
They,
um, That was such a thin... That doesn't work. They...
Um...
Kay...
She's gotta have it.
Shun is a hard sound to have to start a movie with.
Shun.
Oh, oh!
Shunder.
Vacation-ter Island.
No.
Close.
Nice try.
Let's close the books on this one.
We tried hard enough to make this work.
I'm so sorry, everybody.
Now, according to my internet sources,
the 1994 version of Jungle Book was filmed somewhere in South Carolina.
There's maybe some sort of little island
that's part of South Carolina
or something?
Oh, we're stopping off
all those islands,
like, off of Myrtle Beach.
Yeah, so Jungle Book.
What do you got for that?
Ends in jungle or starts in book?
Rum Jungle.
That's a movie
that hasn't come out yet, right?
That's based on Hunter S. Thompson.
Yeah, but it's in, like, they're shooting it, or it's in development?
Yeah, yeah, no, there's a trailer and everything.
It's also getting, you know, some positive buzz. Johnny Depp and that Amber Heard from the recently canceled Playboy Club TV show.
All right.
Yep, it's Matt again.
The movie's actually called The Rum Diary.
Rum Jungle Book of Eli.
Eli.
You can use the I in Eli.5. If you have a connection, 4.5 or... You can use the I in Eli.
Eli Robot.
Yeah!
See, I even wrote it down.
I knew you'd get there.
Okay, and then I'll take it even a crazy,
another crazy step further.
Rum Jungle Book of Eli,
I Robot.
Wait. Wait. lie I robot wait
now I can't understand
what I wrote here
oh yeah
this is great
robot-o-focus
the movie autofocus
robot-o-focus
that's right on the
rush of my vacation no no because it actually sounds exactly alike Roboto Focus. Dude, that's like, that's right on the Rushman vacation.
No, no, because it actually sounds exactly alike.
Run, run, rum, jungle, book of E, lie, robot, toe, focus.
Focus.
Yeah, so us.
And you could still do something that ends in rum.
Um.
still do something that ends in rum um um oh there's i think there's something that ends in r-u-m there's rick santorum
but there's something right there was something about about people trying to go into caves or something called...
What was that called?
Sanctum. Sanctum.
But that doesn't work because of the R.
Sanctrum. Sanctrum.
Sanctrum.
Is there a movie
that starts with S?
S.
I don't
know. Cuss?
Customer? Custody. Custody. uh i don't know cuss cuss customer custody custody custody battle for that great movie custody battle some people call it kramer versus kramer well that's what it was custodian
you were you were you started to call me on it where i would just pick out something like that
because i know there's there has to be a customer. Because I know there has to be a movie. Customer is always right.
There's got to be a movie called Customer is Always Right.
Customer.
Last time yours was Case Closed.
And you were right.
Of course.
Because you know in the 80s when they were just churning out those movies.
Case Closed.
Starring Rob Lowe.
Or like Rob Lowe's brother was in Case Closed or something like that.
Chad Lowe starred in Case Closed?
It was a Chad Lowe project.
You were still married to Hilary Swank at the time?
Rum Runner.
Rum Uncle Rummer.
Yeah.
Captain Rum.
People will tweet at me their answers
that we're missing out,
that we're not thinking of.
I know.
But, you know, we play fair.
We play off...
Yeah, they're sitting...
Just play with our minds. They probably do, too. They probably thought, you know we play we play fair we play off yeah they're just play with our minds
oh they probably do too they probably thought you know people think of it and then they
sit there and yell at their device yelling on the treadmill something that ends in rum
decorum focus focus of light oh Focus of Light. Oh.
That's a movie?
Focus of Light?
Yeah, Focus of Light.
Oh, it's like one of those,
it came out like I think in the early 80s.
Like a,
it's a European film.
I don't know if I care for that.
Sorry, foreigners.
This is a very jingoistic podcast.
No, just, you know, when people start throwing around French things and stuff
recently somebody thought
we should have used il postino
but the il means the
in il postino
so it's not really fair
we could have had a much longer title if we had in the beginning gone with Blackboard Jungle.
That's what I was thinking you'd say.
Oh, that's a good one.
Instead of Rum Jungle.
Rum Jungle.
Yeah.
All right, well, we got Rum Jungle, Book of Eli Roboto Focus.
So that's pretty good in a lame sort of way.
so that's pretty pretty good
in a lame sort of way
so
do you have any plugs
you want to throw in
before we
wrap this up
and then continue
sitting in an airport
for hours
of course
you can get all my
tour dates and info
at grahamelwood.com
there's links to
the comedy film nerd podcast
and
download
pay what you think
is fair download
for my film
Laugh Canistan
it is all available
at grahamelwood.com at GrahamElwood.com.
GrahamElwood.com.
And, you know, my stuff's all at DouglasMovies.com.
And, as always, the weather in Chicago is a shithead.
Oh, total shithead.
Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie.
Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky
There's no room in his heart for you
Cause Doug loves movies