Doug Loves Movies - Al Madrigal, Erik Griffin and Andrew Santino guest
Episode Date: May 24, 2017Back at the UCB Franklin, Doug welcomes to the show the stars of Showtime's "I'm Dying Up Here," Al Madrigal, Erik Griffin and Andrew Santino. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy... and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming babies, sticky seeds with 50 azepam or kernels in his teeth.
There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug loves movies!
Hey, hey, hey, everybody.
My name is Doug, and I... Love movies.
This is Doug Loves Movies.
I don't know what you were doing there.
That was confusing.
I was like, wait for your cue.
Coming to you once again from UCB Franklin
in Los Angeles, California.
It's Tuesday, May 23rd.
I wrote down 2016, but I know better.
Oh, my God.
May 23rd.
I still wish it was 2016.
What's up with your name tags, Los Angeles?
We got some out there?
Oh, we do.
Lovely. They're all in there? Oh, we do. Lovely.
They're all in the center section,
interestingly enough.
Alright, what do you got there for Inglorious Bastards? What's going
on there?
Chang,
Glorious Bastards, because your name
is? Chang.
That's me.
Your last name? Correct. Okay.
Is your first name Chang?
Moving on.
Have you seen
what's that movie called?
Sixteen Candles?
A long time ago. Oh my god, dude. Don't watch it now.
You got it, Doug. Don't watch it now.
You got it, Doug.
Long Duck Dong is really... It's sad.
What's this eraser head thing over here?
What?
Oh, you got a bottle of something?
I don't know what that has to do with anything.
But what's your name?
Aaron.
Aaron?
Oh, so you changed it to...
Aaron Head.
Aaron Head
And then you also taped a Red Bull to it?
Yes
Alright, you think my guests might be like Red Bull
Demons
That are constantly desiring Red Bull
It's a possibility
What's this one right here?
Twelve Years a Dave
Twelve Years a Dave
Wow Let's go back to Chang 12 years a Dave. 12 years a Dave.
Wow.
Let's go back to Chang.
Well, thank you to everyone for bringing your name tags.
And thank you for finally depicting
what could happen if a white man
had to try to escape slavery.
All in one delightful poster.
Doug plugs, tomorrow night, Wednesday, May 24th, 2017,
Douglas Movies is at the Improv in Houston, Texas.
That might be tonight if you're listening to it today
or last night if you listen to it
two days from now. What?
Saturday, May 27th
Douglas Movies
is at 420 at the
LOL
Comedy Club in San Antonio,
Texas. I'm not abbreviating.
That's what it's called.
And then Douglas Movies is back here in Los Angeles
over at Meltdown Comics on Monday, May 29th.
And, oh, we're back at the Comedy Zone in Charlotte, North Carolina
on Saturday, June 3rd, also at 420.
Lots of my shows are at 420.
As you know, all of my dates and dates and links are at DougLovesMovies.com.
That's DougLovesMovies.com.
Excellent.
Prize bag, first First of all a box
We got a from Loot Crate
We got the W Slam Crate
Right
Is that what that is
So I don't even have to look inside
To know that the contents are amazing
We've got a
Douglas Movies t-shirt
Someone sent this to me,
care of UCB Theater,
and no real explanation.
I guess it sort of makes sense.
It's a pouch with a zipper,
and it says,
you say high maintenance like it's a bad thing.
So yeah, so I'm
giving that away.
Don't feel like I need to have that.
Oh, here's something cool that I got.
I got this
gum
that says
I heart my penis on it.
The bag
I also got from the same place and this
monster water bottle.
I didn't even use it. I was at the
Hangout Fest in
Gulf Shores, Alabama and they
gave me this thing and I
was like, that's cool.
Prize bag.
And
a bag from Hangout Fest is the
prize bag also. And then
I had to include, because Christmas
is going to come, it's going to be here before
we know it. And someone needs
to have a Christmas bong.
Start getting ready for the
holiday season now, I say.
And get ready,
get your hands together ready
because
I'd like
you to welcome Eric Griffin,
Andrew Santino, and
Al Madrigal!
Al Madrigal!
Al Madrigal!
These fellas It's a themed panel tonight
Because these guys are all the stars
Of the new Showtime series
I've seen the pilot
And I liked it very much
Hashtag Doug digs it
It's called I'm Dying Up Here
And it's going to be on Showtime starting on June 4th.
Yep.
Starring these guys.
Yep.
Yeah.
Actually, they did the thing.
I'm not sure what people are probably scrambling in all these networks,
but they put it everywhere.
So you could watch this on YouTube right now.
They just put the whole thing out.
What?
They put the pilot out.
Oh, the pilot.
All right, relax.
The whole thing's on YouTube starting now.
Or Showtime June 4th if you want to pay for a service just to see something.
They slapped it out there.
Okay, but the pilot is available.
Yes.
So people listening to this, not you guys here, please stay in your seats.
Don't pull out listening devices.
But anyone else,
pause this program, watch
the pilot on YouTube.
Then come listen to you guys.
You hosted the panel in
South by Southwest, so I feel like
you're pretty on top of this.
You know more than the average person.
Oh yeah, like for instance, Al
Madrigal, I know that you play a character the average person. Oh, yeah. Like, for instance, Al Madrigal.
I know that you play a character named Edgar Martinez.
It's true.
And this movie takes place, it's not exactly the Comedy Store,
but it's the idea of the Comedy Store in the 70s and follows the comedy scene in the 70s.
Executive produced by Jim Carrey,
who knows that scene pretty well, I'm sure,
because he came in right after it.
So he came out.
I get to write on the show, and he came into the writer's room and told us a bunch of fucking stories about sleeping in closets and just getting in fights in the parking lot.
And so we just put a bunch of that shit in there.
And so when he came out, he slept in a closet.
shit in there. And so when he came out, he slept
in a closet. And
another comic, Tom Dreesen,
that we all know,
he told us he ate Kentucky Fried Chicken
every single day for two years.
Because they had a thing called the
Cluckin' for a Buck or something like that.
Yeah, he wouldn't make it
now because it's a Zancou chicken.
They don't have the same kind of bargains over there.
Yeah, that's expensive.
Right? That shit.
That's an expensive chicken.
Let's say hi to Eric Griffin,
everybody. He's back on the show.
Haven't been on
since San Francisco. That was a while ago.
Yeah, you've been on before, though.
I think
we only have
one newbie tonight, but you play
Ralph King on
I'm Dying Up Here, premiering
on Showtime starting January 4th, but you can get it
all right now on YouTube.
Even season two, for some reason.
Yeah.
We haven't even filmed it. They did it all with puppets.
Did you base your character on
a specific comedian
of that time?
Not really, because I don't think they even knew
who they wanted this character to be.
I don't even know a comic that was in Vietnam.
Do you know? Do you guys know?
I don't know who it would have been. I think that they
just liked me when I did stand-up.
I think, didn't you say, South by Southwest,
you kind of had to hit the gas on
acting more black than
you normally do? When you say it like that,
it's like...
It's very Fox News-y how he said that.
Hit the gas.
Did you black it up?
I'm mixed, you know what I mean?
You don't know what I am. You guys don't know
if you want to call it immigration or homeland security right now.
He still gets to do his joke after accusing me of...
You have a piece of paper in your hand.
You know how those rappers, they battle rap,
but they have their phone and they're reading their raps.
You're not freestyling, bro.
battle rap,
but they have their phone and they're like
reading their raps.
Like,
you're not freestyling,
bro.
I think there's
a protest section
of the program.
Is there a suggestion box?
Is there a suggestion box?
More chicken on this show
is what we need.
Wasn't your character,
wasn't it gonna be
a white guy
and then they found you?
No,
I think it was always
gonna be a black dude.
It's always gonna be
a black dude.
So they saw me and they weren't sure.
So that's why I'm wearing this afro.
I remember
when I first came to the hair place
and I was like, okay, what am I doing? And they
brought this afro over and I was like,
okay, I'm a Jackson 5 all of a sudden.
I think I'm based off Tito.
If I can...
You think so, Andrew? Yeah, you're very
Tito-esque.
It's a real good look.
And Andrew Santino
is here, everybody.
From Mixology.
First time on this show,
you joined me on
Getting Doug with High
to get high.
I got so fucking high
on that show.
Yeah, was it too much?
It's too high.
I got too high.
But I showed up a little high thinking... You could ease into it that way. Yeah, was it too much? It was too high. I got too high. But I showed up a little high thinking.
You could ease into it that way?
Yeah, but I was wrong.
I was totally wrong.
It was incorrect.
It was a bad move.
Bad chess move.
I can't go back.
Because I got high enough where I was like, oh, I'll be fine.
I'll be there.
I'll get a little higher than them.
And that was a bad idea.
So then I got so high.
I remember saying my first story to you about the first time I got caught smoking pot.
In the middle of it,
I had that moment of like,
too high, I can't finish it.
I can't finish it.
I bailed right out of it.
Well, that's the great thing about...
Because sometimes you're in your head
when you're so high
and your mouth is leading
and you're like,
come on, come on, come on, we can do it.
We can do it.
We can do it.
And it's getting out
and then halfway out,
you're just like,
no, bail, get out.
It's bad.
It's not going to end well. Don't worry about i think i think drugs are great and any drug there we go
hold on he's got a family everyone this guy's got a family but when you are able to lead this
carefree fucking life of doug benson lots of care goes in with very little responsibility, you can smoke
all the weed you want. Now what happens to me
is I take huge
breaks of smoking pot
or eating it, whatever, and then I'll
see him at a festival
and it's just
like, come on!
Let's go! We're going right now!
And I'll even try to smoke the littlest
bit of weed and be so fucking baked.
You have no idea.
And then I can't talk.
I can't speak at all.
I can't have a conversation.
He can do this podcast.
He can go.
You can do so many things.
I'm just so amazed.
You can do so many things.
No, it's just I can't.
I got high and hosted a panel for a news program
on Showtime.
June 4th. It's called
I'm Dying Up Here. Wait, after we did that,
seriously, you know Sam Richardson?
Do you know who Sam is? Do you guys know Sam?
Sam is a great actor on Veep.
If any of you ever heard this Dave
Chappelle story about Dave getting too high on
Danny Brown's weed, does anybody know that?
And they booed him? Does no one know that story?
Look it up. Right. Some people are saying yes.
Then yes louder. Help me out.
Could they just look up the other
story you're trying to tell? No, because
we're...
Alright, Doug. That's it. Go straight
to that story.
I think it's written on your paper
there. Yeah.
We were in South by after with Doug,
and I saw Sam in the street when we were walking somewhere else,
and Sam was out of his mind, and he looked really uncomfortable.
And I was like, are you okay?
And he's like, I just got high with Danny Brown,
and I have to go to my hotel because I have to lay down for a while.
I was like, don't fucking hang out with Danny Brown.
Apparently, that's like the whole thing.
With you, it turns into something fun.
That just sounds like, you know, Danny Brown just sounds like a code name
for bad weed. You know, don't hang out with
Danny Brown. Too good weed.
Don't go down with Danny Brown.
Oh yeah, I guess in his
case it was too good. Maybe he doesn't
smoke enough because, you know.
I mean, Austin, Texas, they got
great weed there, but it's all from
California or Mexico. It's ours.
It's our weed. We gave it to them.
We're the best, right guys?
It's like
white people hate California. I don't think everybody thinks so.
No, yeah. She didn't clap.
She didn't clap. She didn't like it. There are so many people
in LA that don't bother to vote.
Even in a simple applaud
if you like this vote.
Some people are like, I can't be bothered.
Raise your hand if you hate California.
Raise your hand if you hate it here.
Oh, I hate it.
Let's see.
See, nobody.
Why can't they hate it?
Raise your hand if you hate L.A.
Oh.
Oh, this guy.
This guy.
Oh, he did it.
He went like this.
He halfway.
I mean, you know, you're currently at one of the perks of living in LA
is regular
episodes of this show
and lots of great
cheap comedy
in Los Angeles
yeah
cheap
cheap cheap
yeah
cheap cheap comedy
let's see what you guys
dug up for the
prize bag tonight
do you have
well you know
I'm gonna be honest
we scattered around
my prizes
because Al brought everything Al brought everything let's talk about bag tonight? Do you have... Well, you know, I'm going to be honest. We scattered around my prizes because
Al brought everything.
Al brought everything. Let's talk about Eric's
prize real quick.
I brought this from Al's car.
It's a great
t-shirt I found at Al's car. Now, this has never
been worn. This is a t-shirt
that Eric got for me, but
I
did a daily showpiece
about a guy who wanted
to be able to ride manatees.
And this is the
Manatee River Center.
You see the manatee right there.
And this is the T-shirt
that they gave me on a trip.
That's beautiful.
Aren't you glad I brought that?
Thank you for bringing that in, Eric.
You're welcome, Doug.
Mine is
once again from Al.
Because I spaced.
This is pretty limited edition.
Pretty L.E. Pretty hot shit here.
This is a lanyard
from the
Justin Bieber
roast on Comedy Central
VIP after party.
Wait, wait, wait.
Let me tell you
what's great about this.
When the time machines
are invented.
Right?
You could go to the roast
of Justin Bieber.
You can go to the party!
I believe I have a pass.
You know what?
It says Saturday 314,
but it doesn't tell you
what year,
so you guys are fucking... There it is. You're in good shape. Use 3-14, but it doesn't tell you what year, so you guys are fucking...
There it is.
You're in good shape.
Use it.
Okay, so I have a pretty extensive...
And I have a sticker, so...
Hold on.
I'll tell you about the sticker.
I have a pretty extensive comedy album collection,
and this is a guy that's always just...
The album's perplexed me.
I've listened to it a couple times.
This guy put out... his name is Hal Masters.
And the album's called The Funny Side of the Street.
And it's horrible.
He is really bad at stand-up comedy.
On the funny side of the street.
It doesn't even look like a professional microphone in his hand.
No.
He's got a cocktail and a cigarillo going.
But to me, there must have been this comedy bubble like there is now
where anyone could put anything out.
And albums were being pressed.
And this guy just made himself a fucking album.
So here you go.
It's manufactured by Bolo Records, which is at 1023 North La Brea.
No, my buddy lives there now.
Yeah.
And so here you go.
And then the other thing I brought is these used to be all over L.A.
I'm not sure if people remember Old Chola.
It was a graffiti artist.
They used to put Old Chola
everywhere. Well, I was fascinated by it.
I was like, I wonder if they're
selling anything. I could find
just an image, and I found
this Etsy page.
He sent me a couple posters, but then
threw in five stickers.
This is one of those stickers. There you go.
There's an Old Chola sticker.
Well done, gentlemen.
Any young Cholas here?
Any young Cholas here?
No?
Old Chola.
That's like the longest story I've ever heard about a sticker.
Guess what just went away.
It's no longer in the prize bag.
You're punishing the wrong person.
The eventual winner of that bag is going to want that.
And this, I mean, everybody's got a car they need to wash
This is going to be great
Thank you for bringing all this stuff
Yeah, thank you, Will
I have a difficult question for you guys
That
It's not
It's not going to be math, right?
You're just not going to maybe have an answer immediately.
So raise your hand when one of you thinks
that you have an answer to this question.
And it is,
what is the best movie
that I, Doug Benson,
have not seen?
So we've got to be careful here
because I've seen a lot of movies.
You've seen a lot of movies.
Yeah, so you want to try to pick one
that I have
for one reason or another
have not seen
and it's a great movie
and I need to see it
Eric Griffin
first girl I loved
that's the name of a movie?
yes
I'm actually in that movie
and it is a great movie
It's a lesbian love story
Go check it out
You pretentious fucks
Would like that
Yeah I'm getting into it
You're in it
Lesbians
Plug your own indie movie
Yeah
I just did that
Wait wait
It falls under all the parameters
He hasn't seen it
And it's a great movie
First girl I loved
Check it out
Are you one of the lesbians?
I gotta watch it
I'm one of the lesbians
Wow
It's a low budget
I'm back out
You're wearing an afro as well
Yeah yeah
Okay I'm back in
Alright this is
An emotional rollercoaster
Al's got one
You probably
You most likely
Have seen this
Oh then why
What are you doing here?
I'm trying to get
I'm taking a solid guess
Okay
The founder I have not seen The founder yet Boom It's great People keep bringing You most likely have seen this. Oh, then why? What are you doing here? I'm trying to get it. I'm taking a solid guess. Okay.
The Founder.
I have not seen The Founder yet. Oh.
It's great.
People keep bringing it up on this show and that they like it, but that The Founder, that
character, he's kind of a dick.
Yeah.
But it's a good movie.
Okay.
You don't know how Al Madrigal that was right there.
Yeah.
He's a dick.
Oh, man.
When you guys are walking around on set
with all your 70s shit on
and getting into character and stuff,
do you trip each other out a little bit
because you don't seem like yourselves?
The best moment was when we were on location.
We were shooting it.
They found these little bungalows.
When you watch this show,
it's amazing how they found parts of L.A.
that really do look like his apartment is just fucking incredible my North Hollywood apartment is one of the I don't know
where they found these fucking places in North Hollywood and they we went to a
look we're having lunch in a Masonic temple. Oh, yeah. And we are desperate to cater on the show.
I don't want to sound like a spoiled baby,
but you eat a lot of set food.
This guy was horrible.
We thought he was squandering.
He had a gambling problem,
so he was spending half of the money.
Maybe he misunderstood the premise of the show,
and he thought all the characters had to look like they were dying.
He's definitely trying to kill us.
Because the food was just terrible.
So House of Pies is right across the street.
So we're in full 70s shit.
And he calls up House of Pies.
And we don't have our wallets because we left them in the trailer.
Oh, yeah.
This is great!
He goes to the lady
at House of Pies. He goes,
do you take Apple Pay?
And she goes,
yeah, we take Apple.
We got Apple Pay. She said, we
got Apple Pay. I go,
you take Apple Pay? She goes, we got Apple Pay.
Yeah. So we all go
walking over. We're so excited.
We're going to get breakfast.
We're going to get cups of coffee.
We're going to get a pile of mode.
And we walked out of that catering area like,
the fucking fuck bitch ass food out of my face.
Fuck you.
The fuck ass food.
Fuck you.
Fuck your phone house.
I already had a plate of food too.
And Al comes over.
Throw that away.
You know, so.
So we walk across the street and we go inside and al is like al good instinct goes dude i know you called you should check again yeah yeah house
of pies do you guys know because it was a register house of pies has been around since the dawn of
time he was like i don't think they have fucking apple Pay, dude. It was one of these registers.
I walk in there and I'm like, they got it.
So I go up to the front and I go,
you guys got Apple Pay? She goes, Apple Pie.
Yeah, we have Apple Pie.
We have Apple Pie.
Pecan Pie. Banana Pie.
Chocolate Cream Pay.
And Al is like, God damn it!
We laugh so hard.
So did you make the transaction with
Coconut Cream Pay?
We're in full fucking
70s gear.
And I'm just walking through.
We saw Pete Holmes in the parking lot.
Yeah, we saw Pete Holmes walking through the parking lot.
He's like, what the fuck are you guys doing?
We're trying to get some Apple Pay.
That's how he got the idea for his show.
He went, hmm, comics.
I'm kidding.
That is how it happened.
We also got Legionnaire's disease from the Masonic Temple that we were in.
You know, when you said you're surprised that they found places, it's not me.
There are some spots that you go around L.A. and you're like,
they haven't touched anything since 1970-something.
The apartment that I was in, the guy, someone was like, nobody lives here.
Nobody lives here anymore. And nothing had been touched. And I was like, I think somebody
lives here. And some woman on set had said something like, she was like, I hope not.
And some dude goes, I live here. And I was like, I'm going to get out of here before
a fight starts. So man, I live here.
That movie, The Nice Guys, it just came out a couple, last summer or whatever.
A couple of summers ago
no I think it was
last summer
but it was
when you're
Brian Gosling
it was LA
in 70's set
and
it was
you know
it's kind of amazing
how they just go around
and shoot
a lot of places here
and they haven't changed
yeah
it's the same shit
it just looks the same
yeah
alright I got one okay good but this is not you probably have you seen The Lobster of places here and they haven't changed. Yeah. It's the same shit. It just looks the same. Yeah.
All right.
I got one.
Okay, good.
But this is not,
you probably,
have you seen The Lobster?
Yes.
Damn it.
Yeah.
That's not a bad one to throw out there
if somebody hasn't seen it,
especially if you like
ruining lives.
I love that fucking movie.
Do you like it?
I like it,
but I had to see it
a second time just to get over it a little bit, you know? God, I love that movie. First time you like it? I like it, but I had to see it a second time
just to get over it a little bit.
God, I love that movie.
First time I was like,
God damn it.
Fuck this movie.
What do you think?
Do you think he did it
and came back to the table?
What?
At the very end?
Do you think he cut out his eyes?
You know, he ruined his sight for her?
Of course he cut it out of his eyes.
I don't think so, dude.
I think he trailed off
into the sunset with his eyeballs.
I'd like that. That's a better ending if you ask me. I think he trailed off into the sunset with his eyeballs. I'd like...
That's a better ending
if you ask me.
I think he had the pick
near his eye
and was like,
fuck, there's just
so many other women.
And then he just walked away.
I don't know.
He was a pretty pathetic dude.
Which is why he would bail.
That's my point.
Okay.
Yep.
Yeah, it takes courage to...
Yeah, to poke your eyes out.
He was a fucking wuss.
You know, just to double check your theory,
I'll watch it again and then have more nightmares.
Also going in the prize bag,
a koozie that says,
I'm dying up here, June 4th on Showtime.
How's it going?
Does not actually keep beer cold.
I stole some of those too from the party.
Yeah, this was from the party did you?
this was from the
world premiere screening
thievery
Wednesday
1130 AM
Paramount Theater
the beautiful
Paramount Theater
it was
this guy goes
what?
it was a little weird
of a time
since we're at UCB
I'm putting in the box
space work
oh look at that
oh boy
look at him go
oh boy
oh wow four years at the mime academy Andrew space work. Oh, look at that. Oh, boy. Look at him go. Look at him go. Oh, boy.
Oh, wow.
Four years at the mime academy.
Comics love nothing more.
Ladies and gentlemen,
Eric Griffin's mime school
is available online
for impromptu.
He filled the bin
and then he pushed it down.
This is like being a TSA.
So, uh...
Do you like that new bin system?
Have you done the new bin system?
No, it's...
I hate it.
I fucking hate it too.
Because I have two fucking bags,
so you put your one bag,
and then it's gone.
Yeah.
They separate your bags.
Yeah, they're separating the fucking bags.
Then there's a long chair.
It's Sophie's choice of bags.
I'm so efficient that it allows me
to cut in front of everybody.
Everyone's so confused.
You can just fucking...
You can take advantage of confusion there.
I'm a renegade. I don't pack shit.
What's happening with this?
I just buy when I arrive.
There's a log jam
to get the bags.
You're the kind of guy
that does too many carry-ons.
You're a too many carry-on guy.
I take my Xbox.
He brings his fucking Xbox.
He does.
Everywhere he goes. He brought his shit to the set. He does. Everywhere he goes.
He brought his shit to the set.
He was in there playing games.
He was angry when someone disturbed him to go work
because he was in the middle of a game.
Eric, we need you to stop playing video games.
Put on your hair and come to the set.
Please put on your afro.
There's never been a more parental phrase.
Eric, put down your games, put on your hair.
All right, one more question for you guys.
You handled that one nicely.
I don't think I have to see any of those.
Found it.
First Girl I Loved, though.
You should watch that one.
Okay, yeah.
You're right.
I take it back.
I'm going to see First Girl I Loved.
Have you ever seen Last Action Hero?
Yeah.
Okay.
Wait a minute.
In what world would Doug not see Last Action Hero?
It seems like a hard one to miss.
I didn't see The Founder.
I feel like that just happened.
No, that's not as good as Last Action Hero.
No, not good, but it just happened.
Yeah, The Founder just slipped by me.
It was a weird one.
And now I really want to see it because it keeps coming up.
What about the new Fast and Furious?
Haven't seen that.
Saw it.
Sounds like you loved it.
No.
I think I skipped a couple movies when they became Secret Agents.
How can you follow it then?
They became Secret Agents.
They went from Mazdas to Secret Agency.
Yeah, they have Ferraris now. Yeah, I don't know. How did that happen? Go back to Hondas. Yeah, I like secret agents. They went from Mazdas to secret agency. Yeah, they have Ferraris now.
Yeah, I don't know.
How did that happen?
Go back to Hondas.
Yeah, I like the old Civic days.
Like when they're ripping up CRVs and shit.
And man, homeboy got a little chunky.
I could be Vin Diesel now.
You know what I mean?
You're Vin, dude.
I could be Vin.
Vin Double Diesel.
Plus, they're not walking.
They're driving everywhere.
We actually did.
Yeah, that's true.
So why wouldn't they get fat, right?
They're always in here.
Hang on, hang on.
Hold up, hold up.
Al has a story.
Just start your story, Al.
We'll get to it.
Were you telling me a secret?
We'll still be here.
I was telling...
It was a fucking side conversation
going on in the podcast,
if you're listening.
No, we did Fast Five
together. We did
when we, at the Silent
Movie Theater. It was me, you, Zach, and
Sarah. Do you remember that?
I'm sure that was a fun one, yeah.
It's always a good time. All the Fast
Five, or Fast, Furious,
Fate,
Family,
all of those movies
You can never leave your family
Are great to talk during
And I think that's part of why
There's such international hits
Because you don't have to speak English
To recognize
That the words don't matter
You forgot one Vin Diesel might as well be saying that the words don't matter.
You forgot one thing. Okay, Vin Diesel might as well be saying
I am Groot over and over again in that movie.
Hey, hey, that's some of his best work.
Right?
They should loop Minionspeak over that
and see how successful that is.
No, that is the worst.
Don't you want to kill yourself
after two minutes of the Minions?
Are you crazy?
I fuck with the Minions.
I like them. Dude, those are the best movies ever you crazy? I fuck with the minions. I like them.
Dude, those are the best movies ever.
That'd be a great suicide note.
Fucking minions.
The words.
When they're talking.
Why did he do it?
Ba-da-da!
See what joy it brings when you do it?
You're right.
I take it all back.
All right. You're right. I take it all back. Alright.
You know what?
An Asian people need something.
You know what I'm saying?
I gotta get out of here. Thank you guys so much.
It's my time.
Nothing on that one? Nothing?
Asian guy? Nothing?
No, he shook his head.
No.
Absolutely not.
Absolutely not ambiguously raced man.
Weird that my racism isn't ambiguous.
Yeah, that's true.
You went right for him.
Yeah.
Well, I mean, he was right there.
I get it.
Corner of my eye.
I felt Asian.
Now he's mad.
I'm not Asian.
You're Asian for this fucking podcast, right?
How deep is this hole That you're digging
I know
That's why
Like if you look carefully
When the late great
Don Rickles was on stage
He'd be like
And that Asian guy
Is going
Like and there was
No Asian person there
Yeah
Like he'd just point
To a vague area
And
I'd just say
That that person
Is over there
Everyone's like
Okay yeah We'll take it on faith So he's not even Really insulting anybody He's just like that that person is over there. Everyone's like, okay, yeah, we'll take it
on faith. So he's not even really insulting
anybody. He's just like, ah, that guy over there.
Unless there's happened to be a huge Asian right there
that gets mad. He always
brought an Asian with him. Huge Asian? What are you laughing at?
It's possible.
Have you seen that movie?
Huge Asian?
I wanted to, but when I tried to buy a ticket...
That was Jackie Chan's, I think they couldn't
understand what I was saying.
Like,
one for Hugh Jason?
Hugh Jason.
Hugh Jason.
Hugh Jason,
please.
Are you saying
Hugh Jason?
Sure.
Hugh Jason.
You want to speak
to the manager,
Mike Hugh Jason?
Yeah.
Yes,
I'd like to speak
to the manager
to get a ticket to Hugh Jason.
Al's going to get in a lot of trouble when he gets...
Hugh Jackman.
Hugh Jackman?
I was walking into a multiplex in Portland,
and the sign said, Logan, get out.
You don't like Logan?
The movie, the theater discriminates Against people named Logan
Which probably should
Go down in Oregon
Makes sense probably
Probably a lot of
Annoying Logans
Running around
Did you like Get Out?
I love Get Out
He was so
He's got another one
On the slate right
For 2019
Another comedy horror
They said right
Jordan Pellet
He's got another one
Coming out
That's what they said
Nice
Good for him
It wasn't a comedy It's actually Peely No they said, right? Jordan Pellet's got another one coming out? That's what they said. Nice. Good for him. It wasn't a comedy. It's actually
Peely.
It said it's a comedic
horror. Oh, the next one's going to be...
Yeah, a comedic horror.
That was kind of funny. Yeah.
Lil Rel was funny. Lil Rel was fucking great.
I didn't believe the... I wasn't a big fan
of the premise. We mean we're big for another
premise. Yeah, I just think...
So you didn't like the movie? I don't think rich white people
would make themselves black.
Just for kicks.
For kicks,
you know what I mean?
So when they're driving
away from that town
and they get pulled over,
I mean...
They don't leave.
They're going to be like,
oh, we made a huge mistake.
Don't they get to go back?
Can they not go back?
No, they can't go back.
They fucking, you know,
cut their heads off and shit.
Yeah, I don't know
if we're talking about
the same movie.
Do you guys know
what the last movies you,
you know,
last motion picture experience
you had was?
I went to go see
Guardians of the Galaxy 2
with my family.
And the kids
and everything?
Yep.
Everybody like it?
Everybody liked it.
Didn't think it was
as good as the first one.
Yeah, it was.
Thought the little jokes
were corny.
The it's not ripe yet
bit was way too long.
You didn't think
it was ripe?
It was not ripe.
Okay.
But we liked it.
Last movie I saw was aliens the new aliens
alien covenant alien covenant I haven't seen that yeah that was good I enjoyed
it you know you want a little fun fact is that with that aliens covenant is
that Katherine Waterson is also in Fantastic Beasts we did a pilot together
in 2004 where she was my love interest but I can't talk about my first girl I loved.
This pilot is going to get picked up. Yeah, at least this is some shit we could actually see.
This pilot's not even on the air.
It's called Americana.
You can find it on YouTube.
Is that a fun fact or a name drop?
What was that?
It's just interesting, I think.
A little side note that people may want
to enjoy
if you're a movie buff
I was fired
from a Starbucks
in 2000
I went to one day
of work
but people didn't like
the aliens
because it had
too much story
right
I thought it was okay
you just have to
remember back
to like
that this is
a prequel
to the original
they had a sequel
prequel
it was a sequel prequel right is that how you say it I guess so yeah because it was a prequel to the original. They had a sequel prequel. It was a sequel prequel, right?
Is that how you say it?
I guess so.
Because it was a prequel.
Where does it fit?
But it's after Prometheus
and before the first Alien.
Yes.
But they left you a big,
there's a big like,
where was this guy
in the other movie situation though?
Danny McBride?
No.
The robot.
Who saw it? Nobody saw it?
Yeah, don't give anything away. Spoiler alert!
But it also doesn't sound like
the room's tensing up like they're worried about
spoilers. No, no.
Bro, you ruined Alien for me, bro.
Yeah, we had to be really careful about
Get Out for like weeks because
people get mad if you say too much about it.
Did you see Snatched?
Uh-oh. get out for like weeks because uh people get mad if you say too much about it you see snatched did anyone see snatched wow you i guess hey guys guess who was in snatched is this is that a real game yes because. Because I'm pretty sure I know. Who?
Ike Barinholtz is in it? Yeah, he's in it.
Okay, you're missing a big person, but go ahead.
Who else?
Yeah, Amy Schumer.
No, that's not who you're missing.
Keep going.
Goldie Hawn.
Wanda Sykes.
Wanda Sykes.
No, no, you're missing.
Wow.
Oh, shit.
Is Eric Griffin in this movie?
No, Al Madrigal, motherfucker.
He brought it up. Why do you think I brought it up? I don't, you're missing. Wow. Oh, shit. Is Eric Griffin in this movie? No, Al Madrigal, motherfucker. He brought it up.
Why do you think I brought it up?
I don't know why you brought it up.
Wait, if you know Al, he would never.
No, I still haven't seen it.
That's the thing.
You haven't seen it?
No, he left the premiere. He walked right out the back door.
No, I was away.
But yeah, I just haven't seen it yet.
The guy who directed it is very talented. He directed our pilot. That's what I was away Oh okay That's it But yeah I just haven't seen it yet It's directed The guy who directed it
Is very talented
He directed our pilot
That's what I was really getting at
Did he?
Yeah he directed the pilot
That's on YouTube
I'm mad too
That was supposed to be
I didn't get a role
I was supposed to be like
The person that they call
So mad about that
Bastard
I uh
Wasn't up for that
Didn't have anything
Well you were like a Although I tested to be Schumer's boyfriend in...
What's the first one?
Trainwreck.
And then they got this guy, Bill Hyder, or something, to fucking do it.
I was like, I don't know.
Take a swing at him, I guess.
New guy.
New guy to the biz.
I said, listen, Judd, you're really fucking throwing a long one here but good luck
and see if he can catch it
in the pilot for
I'm Dying Up Here
you got some heavy
acting going on there
Andrew Santino
oh thanks
yeah
we all kind of have a
emotional
pretty deep emotional arc
Eric has fucking
gets that way and Al gets probably the most oh yeah Al's full on emotional, pretty deep emotional arc. Eric has fucking,
gets that way and Al gets
probably the most.
Oh yeah,
Al's full on.
He gets,
yeah,
it gets pretty fucking sad.
There's some real sad,
beautiful moments,
but the,
I think the weird thing is,
I had to live in North Hollywood.
Yeah.
They promoted it
for a long time
as a comedy.
After they watched it,
they were like,
oh.
Well,
that was the mistake is that Jim was always like, it's not a comedy, After they watched it, they were like, oh. Well, that was the mistake, is that Jim
was always like, it's not a comedy,
it's like a drama, but about
the world of comedy. And then
Showtime would still have a few people that would come around
that were like, but it's like a comedy, right?
But it's a head guy.
So many good
characters, though, played by mostly funny
people. And then we should mention Melissa
Leo. Melissa Leo, yeah.
She's the head honcho.
The main character on the show is the lady that runs the comedy club.
And as she said at South By, she didn't even base it on Mitzi Shore because she didn't know who Mitzi Shore was until after they cast her in the role.
Yeah.
She wants to stay away from that world.
She wanted to create her own character.
She sure did.
She did it.
Yeah, she did.
She's a fucking intimidating lady. Let me tell you how fucking one day you know you
know what i want to do the best part was us getting more and more like first you know melissa leo she's
oscar winner and we're just fucking 88 comics so we're starting we're in scenes with her almost
right out of the gate and it's super. But then over the course of 10 episodes,
we got more and more comfortable with her until we...
Eric, what did you say about her at that fucking party?
Right to her face?
That was hilarious.
Well, it's just that if the script says...
Her name's Goldie in the show, right?
So let's say in the script it says,
Goldie is on coke and agitated.
Better watch the fuck off.
Guess who's going to be agitated on set?
And it's like, well, it's Aaliyah.
But man, I don't care how upset she might have gotten when it's time for her to perform,
even just sitting across from her or standing across from her,
when she was done, you want to go, God damn.
This bitch is good!
She was so adamant
about controlling the set
that one day we were on...
It's the first day.
This is like...
Yeah.
This is our set,
our stage
that was just like
our comedy club
was probably, you know,
two or three times
the size of this room.
Four times the size.
She was on the opposite side
and we three idiots
are on the opposite side
and we're in between takes. There's not even rehearsal or anything and we're just chatting and having a good time. Trying to opposite side and we're not even in
between takes was not even rehearsal or anything and we're just chatting having
a good time trying to figure out where we're gonna say cuz we're had we have
like a little improv bit like a fuck like a fucking apparition she just like
I'm here and she's like you don't talk you don't talk and all of us were like
mmm fuck all right well we had that look at each other late she just you know
that three grown-ass men.
More grown-ups.
But not in that moment.
You're like, I'm a child.
I'm still a child.
And I got slapped.
She was intense,
but it was worth it.
But then, again,
gradually over the course
of the season,
she became part of this group
because there's nine people.
Clark Duke,
your buddy Clark
from Hot Tub Time Machine.
Michael Angarano.
And Kick-Ass.
Yeah. Ari Kramer. Jake Lacey. Michael Angarano. Kick-Ass. Ari Kramer.
Jake Lacey.
Michael Angarano was in what?
The Last Emperor.
No, Forbidden Kingdom.
Forbidden Kingdom and Sky High.
He was in Sky High.
It was a great movie.
You guys remember Sky High?
It was fantastic.
You know who he gets recognized for all the time?
Dog Town and Z-Boys.
Someone said that. People love that. He's been in a ton of things since he was little. It know who he gets recognized for all the time? Dog Town and Z-Boys. Someone said that.
Yeah, people love that.
He's been in a ton of things
since he was little.
It was a girl.
Stanford Prison Experiment.
He was in Will and Grace.
He played Will's son.
Yeah, his kid.
I thought he was Jack's penis.
Jack's son?
Jack's penis.
Because he's little.
He's tiny.
He is a little tiny cute guy.
We said one day he showed up
with a new rental car because Al
got him a hookup to get a nice big cat.
Bless you. A big Cadillac.
He got a big Cadillac and Michael
is a small guy. The whole day
we kept teasing that he came in like a child
driving a truck.
His arms were like this.
The wheel was so big and the door him stepping out
of it was like a fucking event
to get out of the car.
Do we miss anybody?
Jake Lacey.
Oh, RJ.
RJ Silo.
The Power Ranger.
Have you ever seen
Me, Earl, and the Dying Girl?
Anybody see that?
Me, Earl, and the Dying Girl.
Nobody.
Wow.
Oh, yeah, he's great in that.
He's the Black Power Ranger.
He's the Black Power Ranger.
And John Daly's great on the show.
Oh, yeah, John.
John's fucking awesome.
Yeah.
All right.
Well, you guys did great in a round of name actors that you're on a show with.
Thank you.
Killed it.
Really killed it.
Killed it.
I don't know who to call the winner, necessarily.
But you guys did a great job on that.
And so this is part of the show where I say, let the games begin.
People brought name tags you guys just have to go grab one that you want to play for whatever person's name tag inspires
you the most okay and just bring it back to your seat and then uh we will we will commence with
the game i brought some buzzers people love love it when I bring the crazy buzzers.
You can just feel the anticipation.
What does it say?
12 years of Dave?
That's not amazing.
12 years of Dave.
Yeah, you like 12 years of Dave, do you?
Get yourself a job working on At Midnight tonight, man.
I can hear Hardwick's going to give you points.
12 years of Dave and Kramer versus Kramer.
That's fucking awesome.
There should be a black kid in this, though.
Doug is black.
I was running my own little affirmative action program,
and I picked Changlorious Bastards.
All right.
There you go.
He really looks good there in the Brad Pitt role.
Good job, dude.
I don't think I should be playing the part in 12 Years a Slave, though.
Yeah.
That's a little bit weird.
You're great on this one.
Yeah, yeah, well, of course.
Is this Whiteface?
What would this be called, I guess, huh?
Oh, yeah, I guess so.
Whatever it is, I don't like it.
You don't, yeah.
We should probably destroy that.
I think you did a great job.
But yeah, so you're playing for Dave,
and we got Chang, and we got,
so there's a person whose name
just happens to be Kramer.
Your last name's Kramer, so you don't have to change anything
in the title. Kramer vs. Kramer.
Good job.
Is anybody here a graphic
artist? You are?
What did you bring?
He didn't bother.
He didn't bother to bring one and that's what you do for a living?
He's like, that's what I do
for a living.
Just like how you guys haven't brought any jokes tonight.
Everybody sucks off when they can.
I know, I didn't have to take all three of you on that one.
I could have just gone after Andrew for trying to give a guy a hard time for not making a sign.
No, he knows what he did.
By the way, I didn't. His
girlfriend or friend pointed him out, so it wasn't
he didn't say I. She was like
him, it's him, so that's your fight to have.
You know, it's important for us to have whistleblowers
at this point, and I'm glad that she
snitches. Snitches get stitches.
Snitches get stitches. Whoa.
No, that's what happens in my house.
That's what happens in my house That's what happens in my house Doug
Inside movie sources
Would you like a buzzer?
Yeah
We're going to need these
Thank you
Yeah you can go ahead and practice if you want
Al do you want to hit yours?
Okay ears. Okay.
I think we're good.
It's hard to stop, isn't it?
But if you guys get, I got one too.
What's yours sound like?
Oh shit, somebody's here.
Like every time.
That's how we used to get the dog.
The dog would hide under the bed.
But if we rang the doorbell, the dog would get so excited
somebody was there.
No matter who it was, they'd get excited and come out from under the bed.
And we'd stand around laughing
because the dog fell for it every fucking time.
What an idiot dog.
Poor dog.
Let's get down to the bottom
of how you want to really bring this thing
to a screeching halt and talk about how you
abused your fucking dog.
Well, I saw the movie
Dog's Purpose, so I felt a lot better knowing
that when my dog died that it went
on to help somebody else.
I don't know what its purpose was in my life.
That doorbell
trick that you pulled on it.
It was good for some laughs.
Alright, so we're going to play
a game tonight called
Alex's, Jason, and Deb's
IMDb game.
It's based on the IMDb
page of
actors and actresses. You know how they'll list
best known
for and they'll have like four of their projects
mostly movie but occasional
TV one will slip in there.
TV one the black station?
What?
So
They don't
list those
Those just come up right
Or they take responsibility for that
Well there's an algorithm that decides it
Plus also actors can go in
And fix their own
If they want to choose their own
Which is kind of weird
I have not
No they can't I've tried it's impossible
They do it
You can ask and they're like
No no but they say it's a thing they're going to change.
Oh, they are?
Like, if you pay for the IMDb Pro, you could probably go in and change it.
Tried it.
You did?
Yeah, I have IMDb Pro.
I don't think you can change that.
I can't.
You can't.
I tried to put myself in The Godfather.
It didn't work.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
I want to be here all night, fellas.
All right, so one of you brought jokes.
All right, one of you.
So I'll start naming the top four.
It's based on box office awards,
what they're known for, basically,
but it's not accurate by any means.
So I'll start naming their top four. Buzz in when you want to guess who you know it's not accurate by any means so i'll start naming their top four
buzz in when you want to guess who you think it is but if you're wrong it's negative one points
you might not want to buzz in on the first title because of course most movies have many people in
there sure meryl streep you know what i don't i don't mind a good pre-guess.
I don't think you want to lose a point over it.
Oh, you get a bonus point for each additional one that you can name if you buzz in before the fourth one.
I'm going to be so bad at this. I'm sorry, 12 Years of Dave.
I think we're all sorry for 12 Years of Dave.
I mean, yeah.
Put some effort.
You know what I mean?
Come on.
I can't believe you picked that.
Hey, don't read what's on the back there, Andrew.
That's the consolation prize if you lose tonight.
I have to read that out loud.
Oh, yeah.
Was it good?
It's actually quite good.
Okay.
See, this Chen Glorious Bastards is smart.
He made it so that Al would have to go to a lot of effort to read.
He taped it on the back there.
Wow.
That's good.
Yeah, it's a good way to keep him from doing it.
How's yours there?
I didn't have a pen.
I'm sorry.
You didn't have a pen?
You had a big Kramer vs. Kramer poster with my face on Justin What's His Fuck, and you didn't have a pen? You had a big Kramer versus Kramer poster with my face on Justin what's his
fuck and you didn't have a pen?
Justin Henry
Academy Award nominated for that
film. You know what, Doug? We're not all
millionaires. We just can't have pens.
I'm sorry, ma'am, that he did that to you.
I can't afford
pens because I stay in hotels.
But that's where you get your pens.
Yeah.
Yeah, exactly.
I think that's what I was going for.
Jesus.
Sorry.
Was that a Marriott pen?
Wait a second.
You want to be in The Godfather?
All right.
So.
Let's try this.
How are we doing on time?
Okay, we're doing good on time
Oh god
What actor or actress
Has their best known for
Start with
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Alright, the second title
The Truman Show.
Andrew?
James Carey.
Yes, that is correct.
I was going for Marlon Wayans.
I was going to say Kate Winslet, so thank God.
There's the
dented beetle.
Nobody? Nobody knows that movie
well enough. What? Truman Show, man.
Didn't you say the Truman Show?
He says, there's that dented beetle?
There's the dented beetle when he's proving to her that the world is in rotation.
He sits in his car in his rear view, and he says, girl with the bags, she spills, kid on a bike.
There's the dented beetle.
That's such an obscure poll.
Somebody loves the Truman Show.
For that movie, I'd go with good night, good morning,
good afternoon, and fuck off, or whatever
he says. Yeah, that's good.
I just wanted to get some civic.
You get to guess
two more Jim Carrey
films that might be in his top four
for extra points.
Ooh.
But if I get one wrong, I'm done. Is that it?
No, you get two guesses. Oh, dumb and
dumber. One more guess.
Wow.
Who would be in his fucking known for...
Um...
Just if you name like a movie that he's in
It might be the right answer
The Amazing Burt Wonderstone
Narrow it down to those
You wanted just a fucking movie
He's in that movie
Can we steal?
No, that's not a part of the game.
Is Dumb and Dumber on there?
It's in Living Color.
Alright, settle down, Al.
Ace Ventura?
Coming in at number three. Ace Ventura,
Pet Detective.
Liar, liar.
And then number four
with one bonus point for Andrew. Dumb and Dumber. Liar liar And then And then the number four With
Cable guy
One bonus point for Andrew
Dumb and Dumber
So it's Dumb and Dumber
And then what was the other one again?
Sorry
You're too busy
Still yelling titles at me
To listen to the answers
You tell me to name movies
Ace Ventura
Pet Dick
Pet Dick
So that means
Andrew's out in the lead
With two points
But we still have
A few more rounds.
Cable guy.
Potential tiebreaker.
So good.
Cable guy?
Yeah.
So good.
Such an underrated Jim Carrey movie.
How often was Jim on the set of Dying of the Deer?
Every single day, every hour, didn't miss a step.
Wow.
It seems like only one of you wanted to answer that.
Real canned answer coming at you. He was around. He was step. Wow. It seems like only one of you wanted to answer that. Real canned answer
coming at you.
He was around.
He was around.
Okay.
He was never there.
What are you guys talking about?
You're welcome.
He came like twice.
Yeah, no, he was around.
He contributed more story
than anything else.
A lot of the story that you see
is Jim's life.
He did all the pre-work.
Yeah, well, he... Yeah. He had 30 years of it.
Then he gave it to us.
So it was very nice. I was going to ask you guys
before the game portion, I forgot to do it.
I think the depiction
of comics, not to blow
smoke up all your skirts, but
I've never seen
it in a movie or TV show
so even though it takes place in the 70s,
I still sort of know what that time was like.
It's just very realistic.
It's hard to get that.
Whenever a character is a stand-up comedian
in a movie or TV show,
they kind of blow it.
They don't really get the feel for it.
But this show,
certainly the pilot that I saw,
does a great job with that.
Oh, thanks.
The things you guys say when you're doing stand-up are funny.
And then when we're making fun of each other, too.
We talked about that.
Yeah, yeah.
Will they let us do that with each other so that there was the written lines
and then we got to fuck around with a little bit.
That was our favorite.
Sitting in that booth and shitting on each other was my favorite thing in the world.
I think one of the things that was great
too was we were able to go
like, hey, we wouldn't stand
here. A lot of times they were
trying to do, the director would want to do a scene
and there'd be somebody on stage and we would say
comics wouldn't stand in a room and talk.
So they would move the scene to
the bar. So that kind of stuff.
We wanted to add as much authenticity
to it as possible because we know there'd be comics
watching going they don't do that they would never
do that well they're gonna do that anyway
but I know bastards yeah but I think they'll do
it less than any other thing like of course we've
all made fun of punchline over the years and all the
ridiculous things like everybody having a locker
and and you know one of the
comics that's there every night is in a nun's costume
there is that's true they do is in a nun's costume. There is.
That's true.
They do have them.
You guys don't have
lockers at the
comedy show?
I have a locker.
It's got a secret
locker room.
It's a secret locker room.
All right.
So anyway.
So I think I proved
my point that you
can't name any good
stand-up comedy movies.
Lenny with Dustin
Hoffman I guess is a
good one.
I hate to make fun
of the new one with De Niro
comedian
that didn't work
I didn't see it
no
well you know
CISO is putting out
like a competitive show
to ours
that's in the 70s
from the perspective of
we'll just stop there
our show's on YouTube
okay
what is this
fucking CISO
yeah
you have to pay for CISO
does anybody have CISO hey listen don You have to pay for CISO. Does anybody have CISO?
Hey, listen.
Don't take down one of our sponsors here.
Oh.
Yeah.
CISO's great.
I didn't say anything bad about it.
I was just talking about a show.
Let's talk some more about it.
Yeah.
What is it?
No, they're just trying to do a Johnny Carson thing.
They're doing their angle.
But it's different, though.
Carson is very monthly.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
That's good. They didn't take a chunk down or anything. It's not as expensive as Doug's podcast, though. Cars is very monthly. It's very different. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. That's good.
They didn't take a chunk down or anything.
It's not as expensive as Doug's podcast, though, right?
See, so?
Are you guys...
Are you...
S-E-E-S-O dot com slash Doug for 10%...
I don't know.
Okay, here's the next round.
Starting with
What actor or actress
Is best known for
You bitch
There's no rules
I did, yeah, I didn't
I forgot to mention that you can't
Knock other people's buzzers off the table
I don't know why I didn't bring up that rule
The first title is buzzers off the table. I don't know why I didn't bring up that rule.
The first title is The Lion King.
Ooh.
Uh-oh.
Al's reaching.
What do you think he's doing?
Do it.
He's going.
He's buzzing.
James Earl Jones.
No.
Damn. Sorry, Al. Now, do we keep going?. James Earl Jones. No. Damn.
Sorry, Al.
Now, do we keep going?
Yeah, we do.
Wow, that was my guess.
Well, maybe this second title will narrow it down.
It should for many people in this room.
Nash Bridges.
TV program, Nash Bridges.
Cheech Marin.
Listen, Al, you're out for this round.
You got negative one point.
Does anybody else have a guess?
Oh, no.
That's a good one.
Keep going.
Say what I just said,
you fucking asshole.
Do people know?
Do you guys know?
Raise your hand if you know.
Yeah, now we all know.
Do you have a guess?
I don't know.
Eric?
Nash Bridges.
What the fuck?
You know,
that was pretty funny, but
negative one point.
I'm not guessing.
Andrew doesn't have a guess? I don't have a guess.
I mean, they didn't either.
What? They were wrong too, right?
No, Al guessed the second time. But they were wrong.
No, you can't guess the second time.
He was right, is what he's trying to say.
Do you want somebody to steal it?
Yeah, Cheech.
Cheech Marin.
I said it.
I already said Cheech.
You can't.
You're out, Eric.
Cheech.
Cheech Marin.
Buzz your buzzer.
Do it properly.
Cheech Marin.
That's so perfect for you.
Cheech Marin is correct.
Dude, you're winning, dog.
Another point for Andrew.
I would have got it.
And you can get two more bonus points
if you can name two more Teach Marin projects
that are in the top four.
One more.
I'm bad.
That's funny. I said I was going to be bad, but I'm bad That's funny I said I was gonna be bad
But I'm still winning
You're definitely losing
Fucking this bonus part
Jesus Christ
Guess something already
You're killing me
Al's a cunt
Is Al's a cunt up there?
You know what?
Cheech was so good in that
There's no way Al's not in Al's a cunt.
It's actually a biographical.
I'm done.
That's all I need.
That's it.
That's all you have?
That's your two guesses?
Al's a cunt and up in smoke.
Oh, right.
Born in East L.A.
Let Al do it.
Do it.
They went with...
Do you know some?
Oh, there's plenty. Yeah. Well, do it. No, let him do it. Go ahead and do it Do it They went with Do you know some? Oh there's plenty
Yeah
Well do
Oh no let him do it
Go ahead and do it
Wait you run through
Every single
Well do the ones that you think
Are on the top
Cause you're fucking
Still smoking
I guess
Still smoking
Yeah
No they went with cars
Oh
Yeah yeah yeah, yeah.
So it's none of the real Mexican ones, right?
Well, I don't know how Mexican this one is.
Desperado?
Yeah, that wasn't super Mexican.
It's more New Mexican than Mexican.
The most Mexican.
It's more Albuquerque.
It's more like Austin, Texas, Mexican.
His pussy speech in From Dusk Till Dawn.
Oh, yeah.
We got big pussy.
We got old pussy. We got old pussy.
We got hairy pussy.
What kind of pussy you like?
We got a fucking old
stanky pussy.
Every kind of pussy.
Do you know it?
Alright, you guys.
Unless miracles happen, Andrew's going to run away with this thing.
Damn it.
Okay, I got to come back.
It's time to come back.
Buzz in on the first one if you can, because if you can get four points on this, then you'll catch up to Andrew.
You can buzz in real early and lose one
so you guys have a chance.
Just a bastard.
No, that's a friendly thing to do. I think that was a nice thing to do.
Give you a shot. He's from Chicago, everybody.
I'm so sorry. He's just trying to let you in.
You know what I mean?
Go ahead, Doug.
Doug, what are you...
I know, it's like golf.
Doug steps up to the pot ball.
Doug can't read
His own handwriting
Is what it is
He was like
In his show prep
He was like
I think I was really high
During this part
The movie is
The Fighter
Oh
Al Madrigal
It's a misdirect Because of the Jim Carrey one.
So this is going to be Christian Bale.
Incorrect!
Fuck!
Andrew?
Melissa Leo.
That's correct.
That's correct.
Oh, 12 years of Dave,
you're taking me out to eat or something.
Well, I'm not supposed to win
because there's nothing on the back of this one.
No, well,
anyway.
Do you want to guess three more just to rub it in?
No. I will.
These guys can.
I'm dying up here.
No, that's not on our top.
It wouldn't be in there yet.
What's the Netflix movie?
Is that up there?
I think it's destined to be.
I think she'll win awards for this.
I thought they sometimes do that.
They put the current projects that they're working on.
She was in The Equalizer, which is a great movie.
Most Hated Woman in the World?
Is that up there?
That's a movie?
It's a Netflix movie That she's in
Oh really?
Yeah
Most Hated Woman in America
That might be the best movie
I've never seen
Yeah
Most Hated Woman in America
Starring her
What's the one
Did you know what it was?
Someone said
Most Hated Woman in America
Yeah
That's her
I didn't know she was in it
That's her
Yeah it's her
She's really great
In that one episode of Louie
Oh yeah
Yeah
Really good in that Where they get into an argument About her stealing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's really, really good in that.
Where they get into an argument
about her stealing material backstage.
She's also in that.
What's that one?
No, I think he has
a bunch of sex with her.
Yeah.
Grabs her boob.
Oh, that was Dane Cook.
I thought that was her.
Oh, right.
The Dane Cook episode.
I thought that was Melissa Leo.
Not the Melissa Leo.
Same thing to me.
Yeah, I could see that.
I thought you were mistaking them.
Come see, come saw, you know?
Is that Dane Cook or Melissa Leo?
That always happens.
It's a fun game we play on this show sometimes.
I'll say the name of a movie
and you guys say if it's Melissa Leo
or Dan Cook.
Are you ready?
Good luck, Chuck.
Melissa Leo.
No, Dan Cook.
Fuck.
Prisoners. Melissa Leo. No, Dane Cook. Fuck. Shit. Yeah.
Prisoners.
Jessica Simpson.
That's not one of the options.
It's Dane Cook.
Melissa Leo.
Correct.
Melissa Leo.
Oblivion.
Melissa Leo.
Also Melissa Leo.
Yes.
Snowden.
Melissa Leo.
Melissa Leo is correct. She was yes. Snowden. Melissa Leo. Melissa Leo is correct.
She was good at that, too.
Yeah.
Dan in real life.
Dane Cook.
That's correct.
You guys are good at this.
Boy of the month.
A lot of my guests wouldn't know the difference between Melissa Leo and Dane Cook.
That's why we're here to educate.
You guys really nailed it.
So that means Andrew Santino is our winner.
So 12 years to Dave.
Come get all your stuff, dude.
Congratulations.
All right, I got to ask for those back.
You want to say anything? I'll give it this one. Give it back those back. You want to say anything?
I'll keep it this way.
Give it back.
You don't want to say anything?
Any words?
Not an acceptance speech or anything?
Oh, see, I still win because he's got the Workaholics shirt on,
so there's a connection still.
It's not your picture, though.
That's Kyle Nuchak's picture.
Yeah?
He's not wearing a Montez shirt.
It doesn't say free Montez on it.
It says free Carl, right?
I don't like how you said the name.
It's a little racial.
Go in your top order of favorite characters from the show.
From Workaholics.
Yeah, and tread lightly, motherfucker.
Stomp through the woods, my friend.
Let's do some plugs, you guys.
Of course, I'm dying up here on Showtime
Sunday night starting June 4th.
But what else you got, Eric Griffin?
Where can people come see you?
You can come see me.
I'm going to be in Connecticut
at the Mohegan Sun
on the 2nd and 3rd or 1st and 2nd, one of those.
And my hour special comes out
on Showtime July 7th.
It's called The Ugly Truth.
Actually, all of us have hour specials.
If you have
Showtime on demand, make sure you catch
our magical special because it is
fucking hilarious. Shrimpin' Ain't Easy
came out on May 5th.
So they put all of our specials on as companion pieces to the show.
So those will all be right there.
So Andrew has one coming out.
It's coming out right now.
Mine comes out June 2nd, the Friday before the show.
So June 2nd, the show is on June 4th.
And then Al's one month later.
Fantastic.
We're getting Kramer a pen.
I like it.
Yeah, we're totally hooking her up.
I want you to keep that pen, Kramer.
No, I need that because the hotel...
That Hilton Inn is for you, baby.
You have to return it to the hotel.
That's the deal.
That's what those are about.
Mr. Benson, we've been waiting for you.
Do you have the pen?
I thought they were free.
What's this, $9 charge?
It's underneath the $17.50 charge
for the porno.
Who's buying hotel porn still?
Nobody.
Not if they got a phone.
Because then you can call in for it?
Yeah.
Yeah, he's still dialing those 976 numbers on your cell phone.
Talk dirty to me.
They still have those ads in the middle of the night with those girls, yeah.
It's crazy.
Call me. Let's crazy. Call me.
Let's have a hot conversation.
Hi.
It's really just me doing it.
Hi, this is Bethany.
My pussy is so wet for your eye.
We got Wes pussy.
We got Harry pussy.
I'm so sorry, that's my boss.
We got me pussy.
You should say a number to press after each one.
If you want these pussy, press two.
We gotta start that service.
I know, but every one you press is still the same girl.
Hi, I have a hairy pussy.
I have a wet pussy
Welcome to Pussy Phone
Please make your selection of pussy you want
Press 1 for wet pussy
Hi
I have a wet pussy
Press 2 for huge pussy.
Hi, hi, hi, hi.
Why is she talking into her own pussy?
It's so huge.
So huge.
Come on, Doug.
How huge it is.
That was hilarious and quick and fast.
She's inside her own pussy.
That's how big it is.
That is so big.
You do your podcast in that pussy.
We're in it right now.
She's co-starring in Oblivion.
That's how big her pussy is.
Right next to Dane Cook.
Al Madrigal, what do you got to plug?
Well, the special just came out.
Right. Of course, I've got a huge scene in Snatched.
I really am in there.
And that's number five on Pussyphone.
Who do you interact with in your scene?
Just Amy.
Amy Schumer.
That's fantastic.
Come on.
We're killing up here.
Really good.
Really good.
They love it.
I've been in,
we talked about this
the last time I was on,
but I've been in
the worst movie
of all time
and that's what
shows up in my time.
I was in a movie
with Christian Slater
and Cuba Gooding Jr.
called Lies and Illusions
where they sent me
the script
and final draft
and said,
go for it.
I swear to God.
Days before my scene, I was like, oh, okay.
And just got to write all my part.
Wait, but you said it's a terrible movie.
It's horrible.
So you didn't do a good job writing your part?
We improvised almost the entire thing.
Christian Slater didn't want to deal with it.
He explained to me, he goes,
Al, let me tell you what we got here.
He goes,
this is a cash grab situation.
So don't worry about it.
Say whatever you want.
He's big in the improv scene.
You know that, right?
He was in a Uwe Boll movie,
so he clearly doesn't...
He's willing to just take the money and just do it.
I think there's a certain dollar...
I've seen all this direct-to-DVD.
So that was like a foreign release.
They spent about three, four million bucks on the movie,
and then they just released it internationally.
I think they make a ton of money, and that's it.
So Cuba Gooding Jr. gets probably like 500 grand.
Christian Slater gets 500 grand, and everybody's happy. So Cuba Gooding Jr. gets his probably like 500 grand. Christian Slater
gets 500 grand
and everybody's happy.
They work for a month.
Right?
That's how it's got to work.
Then they send me the script
and they don't give a fuck.
You should do
the commentary track
on the Blu-ray.
That would be
so fucking great.
We should do
an interruption of it
at Cinefam
oh my god
it's so great
there's a fight
I thought you said
it was terrible
no no
it's so bad
because you know
do you ever see
Transporter 2
no
oh yes
oh you did a fight
in the airplane
where they used
just like a model plane
and it was
like
they did that
in this movie
but again
my brother was on
a flight to Mexico,
and he saw this Mexican guy just watching a movie on his laptop
and loving it.
And then my brother said in Spanish, he goes,
do you like this movie?
And he goes, awesome.
Very good.
Very good.
So there you go.
Fucking that guy fucking loved it.
Validation.
Yeah, I wish we'd known
what else he was watching
and what he thought of it.
I mean, that might have been
your brother just being
a supportive brother.
Yeah.
People love it on airplanes.
We don't do that.
You sure fucking don't.
If you're Mexican
and you've got a laptop
and you're on a plane,
this is the movie for you.
Yeah.
It actually comes
with Mexican laptops.
So this Presario comes with...
It's a Presario.
Doug Loves Movies is back
at Cobb's in San Francisco
on Saturday, June 10th at 4.20.
And thank you to all of my guests.
Great job, guys. That's fun. Eric Griffin. June 10th at 420. And thank you to all of my guests.
Great job, guys.
That's fun.
Eric Griffin, Andrew Santino, and Al Madrigal.
Yay.
And as always, fucking assholes in the Starbucks line who asked 700 questions about the goddamn sausage and egg
sandwiches are a shithead.
Yeah, that's good.
She's getting a valet early.
And Rory Gilmore is a shithead.
Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie.
Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him foggy.
There's no room in his heart for you
because Doug loves movies!