Doug Loves Movies - Andy Signore, Graham Elwood and Jacob Sirof guest
Episode Date: July 20, 2017Live from the American Comedy Co. in Sweet Home San Diego, Doug welcomes Andy Signore, Graham Elwood and Jacob Sirof to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California... Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming babies, sticky seeds
With 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth
There's still not one that he won't see
Cause Doug loves movies Hey, hey, hey, everybody.
My name is Doug, and I...
love movies!
This is Doug Loves Movies!
Oh, you did it perfect.
Coming to you once again on preview night at Comic-Con
at the American Comedy Company in downtown San Diego!
Oh my God, that's right.
It's Wednesday, July 19th, 2017.
I don't know how many years now
we've been doing the show on this particular night,
but I know that we started out over at Tipsy Crow,
which is still a favorite watering hole of mine
in the area. And then we
grew too big for that, so
we moved to here.
And then we thought we were
too big for here, so we went over to
House of Blues.
Then we came back over here.
It's 107 days till Ragnarok This is our 47th show this year
But now, right now
It's time to rock some name tags
Yeah
Yeah
I don't know what is happening
I'm sorry I'm distracted by
There's a clock on the stage
That says that it's 8.07pm
I can live with that
But then below that it says
1 hour 8 minutes 54 seconds
And it's counting down
Like my podcast Is only an hour and eight minutes, 54 seconds, and it's counting down like my podcast is only an
hour and ten minutes long, which it is not. So that's gonna be... I can't look at
that. Can you stop it? Oh that's good. Put a name tag in front of it. I
hope your name tag doesn't get chosen.
What does it say on it?
Midnight Cow Roy?
Okay, it won't get chosen.
But when you let it go,
it's just gonna slip to the floor.
We need a more sturdy name tag.
Hey, Dane Pool.
Let me see that one for a second.
Instead of Deadpool, he's got Dane Pool yeah that's
yeah that's perfect
thank you Dane Pool
I hope you don't get picked
I never knew that Deadpool
had this is this did you put that
on there was that your idea
that's not
did the promotion for
Deadpool say
in a mask no one can hear you scream?
That was you.
Yeah, you did that.
That's good.
And then at the bottom you put, and his adventures
on Earth. That's you too.
But both of those things would be
funny on an actual Deadpool poster.
P. P.aw's Big Adventure?
Your name is Baw?
P-Baw?
That's your whole name, P-Baw?
Oh, your grandkids call you P-Baw
because they're dumb little grandkids.
P-Baw's Big Adventure, though.
I like it.
We've got a Star Wars poster
that I think has a good chance of being selected
for reasons you'll figure out later.
And it says,
Sue Hope
instead of a New Hope.
Right?
Why are you pointing to her?
That's hers?
Well, why does she also have a name tag?
Breaking two electric boogasus?
Is this a first on the show?
Are you trying to pass off two different name tags
in hopes of one of them being chosen?
Good luck.
I'm totally down with it.
I hope the guests aren't backstage listening,
because I would love it if one or both of those got chosen.
Lego Bat Dan.
I like that one.
That one's good.
Look at Bane.
I kind of did and I thought nothing's...
Oh, look at that.
That's adorable.
He put a little me Lego face on Bane.
And my Lego hair because I do have Lego hair.
I already have helmet hair to begin with.
All right, so lots of great ones.
AI sack.
I saw on the internet today.
I liked it better on the internet.
I didn't know it was just going to be
on a sheet of paper that was folded.
But lots of great name tags
as usual here in San Diego
during Comic-Con.
And I know you guys have to make an extra effort to be here.
And I appreciate it.
Who's coming back tomorrow night?
Nice.
And, you know, if you're not coming back tomorrow night, that's cool, too.
I'm not mad at you or anything.
Doug Plugs, we're back here tomorrow night.
Who's coming?
I think there's 70 tickets available.
I think.
I don't know.
But also, tomorrow night is going to be tougher to get into downtown and whatnot.
So I get it.
How many people here are Comic-Con badge holders?
All right.
It's a good amount, but there's a lot of you that are just like,
oh, okay, I guess we'll go downtown.
We're not going to Comic-Con.
We'll fucking deal with the crowds to go see Doug Lowe's movies.
Yeah.
Maybe he'll get some amazing guests
that'll make it worth our while.
Woo!
What else do I need to say?
Next week I'm at the Traverse City Film Festival
in beautiful Traverse City, Michigan.
Monday, July 31st.
Douglas Movies is back at the Gramercy Theater
in New York City.
Shows are coming up in Oxnard, California,
Cincy, Seabus, Tacoma,
Moore.
For all the DDLs
dates, deets, and links
go to DouglasMovies.com
DouglasMovies.com
Yeah!
You guys are perfection.
You are my perfection, San Diego.
That's why you deserve
a top of theline prize bag.
This is a beautiful, glittery, green prize bag
that says My Free Cams on it.
Gotta love the free cams.
We just go there and look at a lady sitting there on a free cam.
In the bag, a blue card from Getting Doug with High
signed by me.
Oh, even better,
a copy of San Diego Magazine
from my hotel room.
One of their pieces in this month's issue
is sex, drugs, and sleep.
The new treatments changing healthcare.
Oh, that took a turn.
That was like the M. Night Shyamalan
of magazine teases.
Here's a copy
of my CD promotional
tour tool
from Naturebox.
Mocha Almonds.
Oh, that sounds good to you.
I hope you win.
I didn't want it.
Also, a T-shirt that says something on it.
Let's see what it says.
The Architect Seth freaking Rollins.
Yeah, this is some wrestling shit right there.
And then, oh, this is neat.
I got this with my lunch at room service today.
And I don't eat mayonnaise.
But isn't that an adorable little mayonnaise bottle?
Yeah, those things are great.
And speaking of adorable, a Christmassy pipe from Peacemaker.
You could be standing in an alley
smoking some crack.
Officer comes up.
Hey, what are you doing?
Oh, nothing.
Just having a peppermint stick.
What are they called?
Candy cane.
Get it straight.
I've only got six months to figure that out.
So many of these Christmas things I'm giving out all summer long.
And also in the prize bag tonight,
everything brought by my three incredible guests.
Please give a big warm San Diego welcome
to Jacob Seroff, Andy Signore, and Graham Elwood.
Take control, San Diego.
You called me a bad guest, so I'm periscoping.
I did what?
You said we were bad guests, so I would annoy you in periscope
because I thought Doug would hate if I was periscoping.
Oh, so you're living up to the bad guest claim?
How many people did you get?
Only 52. It's really depressing.
Yeah, I don't know about periscoping to 52 people.
I'm leaving. But those people are very special. They are. Yeah, they will't know about Periscoping the 52 people. I'm leaving. But those people
are very special. They are.
They will try to murder you someday.
What are you doing over there, Graham?
Just took a selfie of the panel.
Selfie of the panel.
Selfie of the panel.
Okay.
Let's meet you guys
individually.
Because I introduced you all at once.
I feel like this is going to be a fierce panel tonight, competition-wise.
So I'm very excited.
But the person with the least experience in this show, let's say hi to him first.
It's Andy Signore, everybody!
I make Honest Trailers.
You might have heard of that
honest trailers
Emmy nominated
thank you
yeah
and you
run Screen Junkies
with an Iron Man
hand
Infinity Gauntlet
and yeah
and you are
what do you call your title
over there
at Screen Junkies
I don't know
right
you're humble
creator
you're very humble
Supreme Chancellor
creator I love Doug we've been working with Doug and you humble. Creator. You're very humble. Supreme Chancellor.
I love Doug.
We've been working with Doug, and you're the best, Doug.
Thank you.
He's the Supreme Chancellor of Screen Junkies,
and you've got Screen Junkies events going on here at Comic-Con.
Tell these people about them. Yeah, we're going to have you.
We have Screen Junkies Central at House of Blues on Saturday,
which you should all come.
We have a party of Kevin Smith versus Elijah Wood.
We've got movie games with Sam Levine
and Doug Benson. We've got Tim Miller
watching our Honest Trailer with
Deadpool, the director.
And we've got some secret guests from Spawn
the movie coming to watch with Todd McFarlane.
So much fun stuff. And we'll be streaming
live at Screen Junkies News on YouTube
all of our Comic-Con coverage. I have more,
but I'll spare you all.
You can do some more at the end.
We're here.
We're happy.
And thank you for letting me promote and be here.
The part at the end where I say, do your plugs, then do the other half.
Ten minutes.
Do the other half of that.
It was epic.
It was on at midnight last night, and I think I canceled it.
I think you being on it brought the entire show down.
They're like, Comedy Central went, who are these fucking people from our internet competition?
Because it was all
Screen Junkies folks, right?
We were on
and literally they announced
the next day
that it was getting canceled.
Yeah.
It was a lot of fun though.
But yeah,
and they're going to keep
doing new shows
through August 4th.
600 episodes total.
Good for them.
Happy for everybody
if that's what they want to do.
If they're happy,
I'm happy. And that seems to be what they're
putting out in the press releases.
Speaking of happy,
I don't know which guests I could
attribute that word to.
So let's just say hello to
Graham Elwood!
What's up?
Hello.
Comedy Film Nerds is
having as part of a thing tomorrow
night as part of Comic-Con.
Yes, we are. Chris Mancini,
my co-host, and I are on the
Rick Myers Kung Fu Superhero Extravaganza.
He's been doing this for 20 years.
So it's tomorrow at 8 o'clock.
It's three hours.
It's awesome.
He gets really obscure martial art films and shows clips of stuff that's going to be available.
And it's super martial art nerdy.
And he'll have fighters on there and fight choreographers and shit like that. It's going to be available, and it's super martial art nerdy, and he'll have fighters on there and fight choreographers
and shit like that.
It's fantastic.
Last year, he had James Liu, who did the fight choreography
for Luke Cage, was on the panel.
So it's really awesome.
Check it out.
Have you watched Luke Cage?
I love it.
I haven't seen that one yet, but I hear it's really good.
Yeah, Iron Fist is a bag of dicks, but Luke Cage...
I thought it was slow.
It was slow. What?
Iron Fist, I mean, Luke Cage got
a little slow for me. Oh, really?
Great cast, though. Alright.
Yeah.
We're just here to shit on Iron Fist.
That's what we're trying to do right now.
And everybody says it's terrible. I haven't seen it.
I tried. I really tried. I was like,
I'm going to give it a shot. And it was a couple episodes
and it just
gets, it's such a bummer.
Wait, back up. Tell me what happened again.
It was like, yeah.
He's like,
yeah, I got a David Soul haircut.
Yeah, yeah. It was fucked up.
Doesn't he look like the dude from that 70s show?
Yeah.
Which dude?
Or does any one of them matter?
Danny Masterson.
Danny Masterson.
Oh, okay.
It's such a bummer,
because all the other Marvel shit on Netflix is so...
I really like it, so...
All right, but that still counts as TV, right?
Well, it's kind of cinematic, Doug,
in the way that...
But they're not movies.
It's a TV show, so let's stop talking about it. I'm sorry. Doug, in the way that I tell the story. But they're not movies. It's a TV show.
It is TV.
Let's stop talking about it.
I'm sorry.
Doug hates TV.
Doug loves movies.
Let's fucking just follow a simple premise.
God damn it.
Jacob Searoff is here.
All right.
San Diego.
San Diego.
San Diego The winner in Tempe
Against strong competition
A jackass and a musician
So I invited you back
To here tonight
And you accepted
I accepted and now I'm playing against two fucking Batmans
It's been neglected to mention somehow
That both the other contestants are wearing Batman shirts
I feel like the fucking Joker right now
It's funny too It's almost like a Batman shirt wearing Before and after mention somehow that both the other contestants are wearing Batman shirts. I feel like the fucking Joker right now.
It's funny, too.
It's almost like a Batman shirt wearing before and after because Andy's got just a T-shirt and Grams is like he's about to be in a bicycle race.
Tour to Gotham.
Exactly. It's the bike race Gotham Exactly
It's the bike race Gotham deserves
Bring your bikes out of the saddles
Alright so
Jacob
So you're feeling the heat this time
You feel like you've got strong competitors
Strong competitors but I'm happy about that.
I don't want to be...
You're excited about it.
Yeah, I like to play against them.
Being able to...
I want to beat the best,
you know?
Like Ali.
These two aren't going to go,
what was that movie
where the guy...
We had a lot of fun, though.
It was a great time.
And I'll have both of those
gentlemen back someday.
Well, let's find out about the prize bag.
What do you got for it, Graham?
Doug, I have a couple of fun-filled items.
First of all, I have a copy of Earbuds,
the podcasting documentary that...
is available at comedyfilmers.com.
I also have a couple of copies I'll sell after the show,
and it's going wide.
I can't really say the date yet, but in the fall,
it's going to go wide on all of the people.
How much does it cost to buy one after the show?
Oh, it's only $20.
No tax, cash, credit, blood.
How long is the film?
It's about an hour and 40 minutes.
You're in it.
Am I in it?
You are in it, Doug.
You're fantastic.
I'm in it?
Okay, so there you go, you guys.
$20 to take a look at this. You already paid once tonight in it, Doug. You're fantastic. I'm in it? Okay, so there you go, you guys. That's all you need to know. 20 bucks to take a look at this.
You already paid once tonight for it,
so think about your decisions.
What else you got?
I also have some Seattle's Best Decaf In-Room Buffet.
Oh, that seems like a hotel room thing.
I always like that.
If you're not going to use it, why not give it away?
Why would I want to... It reminds me. I'm just going to use it, why not give it away?
Why would I want to?
It reminds me.
I'm just going to give all the shit in a hotel room that I'm not going to use that you can take
and just give it out to the homeless.
Well, they're going to love alcohol-free makeup wipes.
Right?
After a long day of being homeless?
Yeah.
So I'm really taking care of the homeless problem. Wow, way to bring of being homeless? Yeah. So that's...
I'm really taking care of the homeless problem.
Wow, way to bring it, man.
So that's my fun stuff.
All right, great stuff.
Thank you.
Yeah, we're going to build up to the best stuff.
Jacob?
Yeah.
Well, it's kind of easy to follow that.
Only one of the three of you has already been to Comic-Con.
Well, I got some not that bad stuff.
Here's a t-shirt that I got here when the club first opened.
It's an American comedy club.
Does it have an eagle on it?
Oh, it does.
It's got the thing on it.
If you like the logo.
You walk around in that, it's like saying, I like comedy and I like America.
Right.
And I like, what are those things called when they're
ironed onto the shirt?
Iron on?
Yeah, I think that works.
And I got this pretty rad thing
that I got when I was a guest on...
Well, no, I think we got this through you somehow.
This fell into my lap.
But it's a pretty cool Pax vaporizer.
Oh, that is nice.
This is a fancy one.
It can do loose leaf or extract. I didn't look it up, but it retails somewhere a pretty cool Pax vaporizer. Oh, that is nice. This is a fancy one. It's like it could do
loose leaf or extract.
I think this,
I didn't look it up,
but it retails somewhere
between like $40 and two grand,
I'm pretty sure.
So it's a good unused.
I never use that.
And I also,
just in keeping with tradition,
took a hotel thing.
But I think it's kind of
appropriate to the weekend
or to the week.
I took the sewing kit
out of my hotel room
because, you know,
if you guys are wearing your nerdy cosplay shit and like...
Right?
You might have to make a last minute fix if your vagina is showing.
Bend over and it rips.
I imagine a lot of you might have that problem.
So, yeah.
There you go.
Love it.
It's a sewing kit.
That's very thoughtful.
Oh, and also this bag from San Francisco Sketch Fest 2017, which I participated in.
Okay.
So now you got to...
Keep the bag.
A bag full of stuff and then
another bag.
Oh no,
speaking of bags. I got a real big bag.
Andy Signore has got one of these fucking
bags they give out at Comic Con.
It's like gigantic and people wear it on the backs
like they're going to climb Everest. I'll be honest.
I don't know what's in here, but it's all the stuff
they give you at Comic Con.
All of it's in there. It's all in there. But what's in here, but it's all the stuff they give you at Comic-Con. Okay? All of it's in there.
It's all in there.
But what's the best thing in there?
But that's not very nice.
I got Doug a Yu-Gi-Oh hat.
You should wear it for the show.
Because that way you can be Yu-Gi-Oh during the show.
You have to tie it around the back.
No, but then there is actually a real item.
They didn't pay me to do this.
I'm just Buddy's Loot Crate.
And I was like, Loot Crate has really cool exclusives.
What do you got? Can I give just Buddy's Loot Crate. I was like, Loot Crate has really cool exclusives. What do you got?
Can I give something to Doug Loves Movies?
This is like one of 2,000 Rick and Morty gold exclusives.
Like super sold out, super hard to get.
And I'm giving it to one of you guys.
Oh.
It just shattered in a million pieces.
Oldest trick in the book.
Throw it on the ground and break it.
Wow, that thing is cool.
I want it.
Doug's trying to take it.
He told me, don't give it to them.
I want it.
I'm going to hang on to it.
Oh, it's got explicit content.
We shouldn't give this away.
There's a lot of children here today.
My six-year-old loves that show.
I'm telling you, dude,
everyone I meet or talk to that exists loves Rick and Morty.
People are super into it.
I got to check it out.
I really haven't.
I haven't seen any Rick and Morty, but I'm excited that there's a thing out there that everybody loves so much.
What if they change it to Pam and Mindy?
Then would you guys all get mad i'm just so weirded out about how mad people are about a female doctor who and then people
that take it another thanks then people some people take it another step and then criticize people that they go, well, they're clearly making it a woman now to make a point that they, you know what I mean?
Like they're taking it like it's becoming a woman now just to piss off people that would be mad at a woman Doctor Who.
And like, well, no better time for it then.
Let's get it the fuck over with.
Why was anybody still angry about a woman
playing a part that a man might have also played?
I saw the new casting.
I didn't even realize it was a woman
because I don't see gender myself.
You just saw a long-haired man or a thing?
It's Doctor Human.
You saw kind of a cute thing?
She's an attractive woman, right?
I don't know.
It's a person, Doug.
Well, I take it all back.
Have you ever watched it?
I haven't seen any Doctor Who,
and that's another thing
somebody tweeted.
I forget who,
but it's funny
that there's people out there
that are mad
that Doctor Who
turned into a woman
who don't even watch the show.
It's like,
well, shut the fuck up
if you don't watch the show.
I got into arguments
on Twitter,
because I don't watch it either
because it's such a time suck to watch 50 years of a show.
Right, yeah, yeah.
That's why I don't watch it.
Like, I don't watch Game of Thrones, because I'm seven seasons too late,
but Doctor Who, I'm a lifetime too late to jump into Doctor Who.
Even though when I see, like, a clip thing,
or when I hear Chris Hardwick talking about it,
it all sounds very, I have a very positive attitude
about Doctor Who and think that it
why wouldn't it have happened sooner
if there's been ten different doctors
why hasn't it been a woman sooner
and why hasn't it been a dog yet?
You know what I mean?
I mean
of course they're going to change
it up but change it up to a woman
pretty fast.
Like, why wait around this long?
That's just, again, we're talking about a TV show.
They don't all agree with you.
No, some of them don't care at all.
This is still a military town.
I don't care if it's Comic-Con.
What, really?
Is this a military crowd?
Town.
Town. Town.
Yeah, well, still, we're having a special meeting in a basement right now.
This is...
These are people that are not committing to anything.
I saw on Vice News last night, there's places where they're trying to get people to move there
just by saying, only conservatives live live here it seems like the fucking weirdest
thing and there was a lady that was just like we lived in California everyone
returned people were like I like abortions like they were just so
terrified by liberal behavior in California. I mean, they can be fun depending on the circumstances.
What, liberals in California?
Sure they can.
Listen, this guy Dane Poole put his sign in front of the clock,
so I have no idea what time it is.
I'm just kidding.
I'm just joking around.
That's all the stuff that's going in the prize bag.
But two quick questions before we get to the game portion of the show.
Starting with Jacob.
Because this won't be a surprise to you because you've been on the last couple episodes.
What was the last movie you saw?
Oh, well, today
I didn't get to watch a whole movie since I've been
on the show. I think I should rephrase
the question in future episodes. What was
the last movie you saw? And if it was truly
the last movie you ever saw, could you
die satisfied?
I don't think so because I watched
What's Eating Gilbert Grape
in the hotel room today. I don't think that
would be... I mean, there's a lot to... I did see
the scene where Mary Steenburgen gives him head
while she makes him talk on the phone to her husband.
And if there's one scene
to see, that's the scene, I guess. Is that movie rated
R? I don't think so. It was like a PG-13
head.
There was an apron.
I don't recall a lot of head going on
in PG-13s. Yeah, there was.
She's always playing the hot older chick that hooks up with the young... She did that in Life is a House, too. I don't recall a lot of head going on in PG-13. Yeah, there was. She's always playing the hot older chick that hooks up with the young.
She did that in Life is a House, too.
Like, I don't know.
This is resonating with anybody, or you guys just don't know who she is?
Nobody's interested.
Nobody has a Ted Danson's wife fetish besides me?
Okay.
Got to drag Ted Danson into it.
So, yeah, but there was also really, I forgot there was kind of a,
well, a would-be homoerotic scene when Leonardo DiCaprio gets out of the bath
and he throws a bunch of towels on him
and he's hugging him
and it's a little sexy, I guess.
It's sexy?
In a way.
He's playing like a mentally handicapped boy.
It's still Johnny Depp.
Who almost dies?
Like the kid freaks out and he almost dies?
Yeah, he almost dies.
And you're like, yeah.
Yeah, I mean, danger is sexy.
Graham is the angriest mime masturbator.
Get the fuck out of me, semen.
God damn it.
What was the...
That was the tagline for...
I can't think of the fucking name of the movie.
K-19, The Winter Maker.
So...
No, that was the...
Okay, Hunt for Red October.
Would that have been better?
Crimson Tide.
Get these semen out of me!
I think it was... of me. Das Boot.
U571.
Yes, U571.
We have a winner.
Points.
R.I.P.
No more points.
What was the last movie you saw?
Me?
Whoever.
I'm not trying to brag.
Whoever feels like answering.
I can't say.
What?
It's a secret?
I saw American Made, the new Tom Cruise, Doug Liman movie.
Wait, and you just said it.
You said you can't say.
I saw it, but I can't say anything about it.
And then I was going to say, well, then I'll go back and I'll say The Hitman's Bodyguard
with Ryan Reynolds and Samuel Jackson. I can't say anything about it. And then I was going to say, well, then I'll go back and I'll say The Hitman's Bodyguard with Ryan Reynolds and Samuel Jackson.
I can't say that one either.
I don't care.
I was going to say The Kingsman Part 2.
I don't care.
I don't care.
Can I say this?
Yeah.
I will say I like them all.
Oh, okay.
But I got to grill you.
I'm supposed to.
Don't say it.
I'm going to grill you about this Tom Cruise thing.
Yeah.
Later after the show.
Tom Cruise and who?
It's Tom Cruise and i can't say his
name domino gleason donald that guy's always great it's and who directed it doug liman it's
pronounced general huck and you like doug liman movies i loved edge of tomorrow didn't you yes
i'd say jumpers is maybe the only doug liman movie I'm not a fan of Jumper
Mr. and Mrs. Smith is amazing
and Go is amazing and he started
all off with
Sfingers
which in
Sfingers here's a funny thing that I
noticed
Spider-Man Tom Holland
in the new Spider-Man leaves Tom Holland in the new Spider-Man,
leaves messages for Happy, played by Jon Favreau,
that are as embarrassing and sad
as the messages Jon Favreau leaves for his ex in Swingers.
It's like a repeat of the same sequence of events,
but anyway.
I don't know.
What were we talking about?
Graham's last movie he saw.
War for the Planet of the Apes.
Okay.
Yeah.
I liked it.
That's exactly the reaction
America seems to have to it.
People are pretty into it,
but also not into it.
Everyone who sees it, I think, is enriched. You know, like everyone who sees it, I think,
is enriched by the experience,
and everyone who doesn't is gonna be fine.
You know?
Can I say what I do like publicly?
I think it's a really well-made movie.
I just couldn't care about what was going on
with these apes going, hey, these people,
this Woody Harrelson, what's his problem? Like, the apes should have
just been like,
smoke a joint, settle down.
And Woody would have been like,
what?
He's really good in it,
but he's...
Circus, I mean.
Andy Circus is incredible.
Andy Circus should get nominated.
He should get nominated.
It's like amazing
how real those apes have gotten.
I guess so.
The big sick,
I was going to say.
Maybe that's not what
I was looking for
was real apes.
Can everyone go see
the big sick for real?
The Big Sick is great.
I've heard horrible things about it.
It's so awful.
Nobody likes it.
My whole Twitter feed is just plodded with people bashing that movie.
If I haven't said it on Doug Lowe's movies, I've said it somewhere else.
The Big Sick is a nearly, I take out nearly, it is a perfect romantic comedy.
It is perfect.
It really just hits all the right notes
and is fun for a girl and a boy.
Ray Romano was great, right?
Amazing actors.
Ray Romano.
He's great.
Holly Hunter.
That's not what she sounds like.
She's great. It's great. It she sounds like she's great it's great it's great
I think the next episode of this
show has an ad for Big Sick
and I'm going to try
to read it like I have no enthusiasm
for it whatsoever
because that's what I like to do with the ads
this is a question
I've been asking Jacob gets to
marinate on it all the time because
he's heard it already but graham and andy are new to this so we'll make jacob go first
what's the best movie that i've never seen okay what's i'm looking for an experience like where
i'm like oh yeah you're right i've never seen that okay there's a movie and i watch it i go
that is great
I think this is a great movie
and I'd be a little surprised
if you'd seen it
alright you're already
underselling it
okay
it's a movie that
well it's gone by several titles
when I first saw it
in the 90s
it was called
Comet Butterfly and Sword
it's been renamed
either Butterfly and Sword
or Butterfly Sword
and it's a
it's a Hong Kong
Kung Fu movie
with Michelle Yeoh
and Tony Leung.
Listen to the crowd backing you up on that.
Well, you said obscure.
I didn't ask for an obscure
movie. I said what is a great movie
that I've never seen.
Andy's seen the movie and has an opinion on it.
It doesn't have to be that obscure. I haven't seen...
There's some shit I haven't seen that's
supposedly great. I've never seen Gone with the Wind.
I would have said that.
I love that movie. Really?
That's a good movie.
It's Gone with the Wind.
What's something great?
Andy Signore, go. Wait, wait. Have you seen the one I
said? What? Have you seen? You didn't say
if you had said it. The Comet... What are you saying?
Butterfly and Sword. You didn't tell me. I haven't seen it.
No, I don't care to.
What?
You haven't sold me on it. It sounds it. No, I don't care to. What? I got that one.
You haven't sold me on it.
It sounds like it's probably a good kung fu movie.
It's a really good one.
Have you seen it, Graham?
Nah.
Yeah, and he's into that shit.
Oh.
He's into that shit.
It's really good.
Have you seen Sing Street?
Yes.
All right.
I do agree with you, though.
If you really had me there, if I hadn't seen Sing Street.
If you haven't seen it.
Then I would be like, yeah, you got me.
I gotta check it out.
Here's my list right now, and you guys can back up or whatever.
Green Street, Hooligans.
See what I'm saying?
I get mixed reactions to all these.
I want a movie that I think is going to be great.
I'm not going to watch it until I find it.
Predestination.
Some people are super
into it. Who's seen it and didn't like it?
Alright, so it's only
people who have seen it like it. What?
It's great!
Equilibrium.
See what I mean?
None of these are unanimous, but maybe it's because they're so hidden.
They're such hidden gems.
So those are the three.
What did you yell out?
What?
Gunkata?
It's something they say in equilibrium?
All right, I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
But thank you.
Thank you for your contribution.
And all right, so did everybody say one?
Graham, did you say one?
Charlie Varick.
You know what?
I'm a huge Walter Matthau fan
and I've never really
watched that one.
So you might have done it.
You might have cracked it.
Yeah.
Take a victory lap and a bow.
You deserve it.
Get on the bike.
What's that available on?
I don't know.
All right.
So, yeah, I'm not going to watch it.
VHS.
It's on VHS, this guy says.
This Weisenheimer over here.
It's got to be online somewhere.
But, boy, almost any, you know, like, let's do this.
Let's have a round of what's a bad movie that has Walter Matthau in it?
Grumpy Old Men?
I don't know, man.
I like both the grumpies. It's not that good.
I like grumpies and I like grumpies at sea.
I like the one where they're out on a boat.
The two of them together just being grumpy.
Yeah, something like that.
Out at sea.
He's in SOB. that's not a great movie
He's not in SOB
And SOB is great in parts
Oh no, You Oughta Be in Pictures is not a great movie
Nah, that's not, you're right
That's an eh one
But he's still, god damn it, Walter Matthau
So entertaining
Is Jack Lemmon in SOB?
Huh? No, neither one of them
Richard Mulligan
Menace the Menace, good one Whoa, yeah Is Jack Lemmon an SOB? Huh? No. Is Jack Lemmon? Neither one of them. Richard Mulligan.
Dennis the Menace.
Good one.
Whoa.
Yeah.
That's a little rough.
He was good, though.
He is, yeah.
I mean, but he gets fucking, like, watching poor old Walter Matthau get, like, the fucking shit that that kid does to him.
Because they treat him like a wet bandit from the Home Alone movies. And he's just the fucking Dennis the Menace next door neighbor.
He's not robbing anybody.
And the kid's shooting Tabasco sauce in his eyeballs.
The kid's a huge asshole.
It's terrible.
But that kid turned out to be great in Rushmore as the bully kid.
Yeah, when he got older, the kid from Dennis the Menace was in Rushmore.
All right.
So listen, you guys. Thank, when he got older, the kid from Dennis the Menace was in Rushmore. All right, so, listen, you guys.
Thank you for joining us in the basement.
That's it, right? We're done?
Got to wrap this up.
There's so much, the thing about Comic-Con
is there's so much drinking and drugs to do.
There's so much out there for us, you guys,
that I'm going to have to cut the show short.
No, turn it off, Bert, because this is the part where I say,
let the games begin.
We got name tags, lots of name tags.
And don't forget that this Dane pool one's in play as well.
And yeah, go grab a name tag you want to play for.
Give everybody a fair look.
And while you do that,
we'll do this.
We'll be right back.
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Back to the show.
Alright, we're back!
Everybody, people in the front row are saying holy shit so i guess we
should start with grams what is that um it's uh they took the murder on the orient express uh
poster they put lights around it and um snow and it's a murder on the uh her name well i it's a murder on the... Her name...
It's murder on the Corriant Express,
and I was like, your name's Corriant?
But no, her name's Corrie,
so this is what it's murder on the Corriant Express,
ladies and gentlemen.
Yeah, and it's the old one,
not the new one with Kenneth Branagh.
Yeah, it's the old school one.
Robert Finney, Lauren Bacall, the whole gang.
Yeah.
Kenneth Branagh in the new one has
sports the world's craziest
mustache. And then he
solves the mystery. I assume he solves
it. He's Hercule Poirot.
But good job, Corey. You got
Graham's attention somehow. I don't know
what about that
appealed to him.
Shiny. Yeah, shiny and puffy.
Lit up.
I can either, you know,
have a seizure or fuck it.
What?
GrahamElwood.com
That is a great go-to
whenever a joke bombs.
Just say your domain.
I'm going to start using it,
but I'm going to also say
GrahamElwood.com.
Yeah, yeah.
Of course.
That's fun.
You jerk.
You're a jerk.
What's your name tag?
There was someone
in the front row with money,
but last time I was on the show
I took one with money
and I feel like I didn't want
to encourage that behavior going forward.
You did do it the first time.
I did do it the first time.
You did take the 20.
Although, for the record, I tipped a bartender with it later that night.
So I went with Star Wars Episode Jesse, Revenge of the Seraph,
because I had my last name on it, even though it's kind of a lazy sign.
That was a first for me that I actually saw my last name on a sign.
It worked into the title, so I appreciated that.
Yeah, it's made on a panel of a box from Staples.
I did that.
Yeah, I chose a little hastily, and I'm like,
I could have done some Photoshop or something.
But it's, again, I'm enough of a narcissist.
My last name got me.
Well, speaking of bribery with booze and money and candy.
Candy, booze.
And Harry Potter jelly beans.
I got to pay for my crew's drinks back there.
So I'm totally, I got a lot of things to do.
So I'm doing it.
And Bertie's beans.
Can we eat them during the show?
Well, that's what I want to try one because they're fucking stupid ass flavors.
You're going to have the vomit?
I'm going to eat.
No, I'm just going to eat one without looking at the chart, what color it is.
Are you going to eat it too?
No.
And I'm just going to eat one and I'm going to tell you without looking at the chart, what color it is. Are you going to eat it too? No. I'm just going to eat one and then I'm going to tell you what flavor I think it is.
Muggle's butthole.
Watch out, Hagrid's feet is in there.
What is that?
Try that one.
No.
Try that one.
What is it?
I don't mind it.
Aw, damn it!
Is it supposed to be bad?
It was almost barf.
Almost barf?
Oh, yeah.
What?
Oh, that was so worth it.
No.
Oh, no, almost barf.
It kind of tastes like a peep.
It kind of tastes like a peep.
Want one, Jacob?
I'll take one.
What is it?
You're going to put it in my mouth?
Wow, that was nice of you. So you got some vodka and some beans, but you're playing for a Sue Hope.
Kevin Smith's on there.
She's got Graham on there.
It looks like an ad for our show. Jacob's up there. There's Graham down here, too Kevin Smith's on there. She's got Graham on there. It looks like an ad for our show.
Jacob's up there.
There's Graham down here, too.
Graham's on it, also.
She left Carrie Fisher alone.
And it's hard to do card stock.
That's hard to do, and it takes time.
Yeah, it's all good.
Great job.
Here's your beans back.
Here's your fucking beans.
Is there almost urine in there?
Because I wouldn't know the taste of that.
I wouldn't know what halfway to urine tastes like.
But partial barf, I know that one.
Halfway to urine is like squirting.
I think that's halfway to urine.
GrahamElwood.com!
You could just DM me on that one, actually.
You don't have to go to Graham's website.
Just slide into those DMs.
All right, you guys.
This is going to be some serious,
serious competition tonight.
I'm very excited to start things off with a round,
four rounds to be exact,
of Alex's, Jason, and Deb's IMDb game.
Yeah.
It's very popular here in San Diego.
There's a similar amount of people who are excited about that
as they are about the motion picture equilibrium.
Wait, what was the one?
Oh, Charlie Varrick.
All right.
I got to try to see Charlie Varrick.
I should be a Walter Matthau completist.
You're going to love it.
It's 70s heist stuff.
I've seen his worst.
It's great.
Yeah, and he's amazing.
Buzz in with your own name
when you think you know the actor or actress who's IMDb top four I am listing.
Just say her name?
From IMDb.
Okay.
Yeah, you are Andy and I am DB.
Bonus point potential if you buzz in before the fourth title because you can name the number of remaining titles for one point each.
You want to practice buzzing in?
Andy.
Yeah, very good.
GrandmaWood.com.
Do you want that to be your buzz in?
No, I'll go with mine.
Because it could be anything.
It's just the first person.
Martha!
Yeah, that's fine.
All right, so Andy's going to buzz in as Martha.
Martha.
What's yours, Graham?
Too soon, bro.
That'd be weird.
It'd be weird if everyone buzzed in with the same name.
Kind of defeats the idea.
I'll just...
You'll know it's me.
Okay.
Oh, no.
It's going to be a palm strike, I think.
All right.
Whose top four starts with
The Hurt Locker?
Graham.
Oh, he's going for it.
Jeremy Renner.
That is correct.
I thought Anthony Mackie.
Lots of actors in that movie.
He could have been somebody else.
But he nailed it.
That's worth one point.
Plus, you can name three more Jeremy Renner motion pictures for three more points.
The Town?
That's one.
One.
The Avengers Civil War What's another one?
Captain America Civil War
Alright he got it
The Civil War problem
That one
Could have been Hotel Rwanda
An actual one
Gone with the Wind, it was called.
And let's go with whatever the fucking Bourne Diplomacy one.
He was just in Bourne Contingency.
Pick some words.
Choose your words.
The Bourne Contingency, that's what you want to go with?
Bourne Supremacy, that's who you want to go with? Bourne. Bourne.
Supremacy.
Okay.
All right.
Fuck off.
That's in development.
All right.
Well, you know, you got that one point for Hurt Locker, so that's not so bad.
Because the remaining films they listed were Arrival.
Oh, fuck.
Pretty critically heralded and Best Picture nominee,
The Avengers, the first one,
and The Bourne... Legacy.
Legacy.
Let me say it.
You don't get to say it.
I was giving a little dramatic pause in there.
Sorry.
Fucking Signore jumps in.
I had to impress them.
Graham's in the lead with one point, playing three rounds,
plus a tiebreaker if necessary.
Whose top four starts with A Beautiful Mind?
Jacob.
Jennifer O'Connell.
Interesting guess.
By an interesting guesser.
Incorrect.
Martha!
Oh, shit.
Here comes Martha.
What do you got, Martha?
Russell Crowe?
No, Martha.
No, Martha.
Looks like Graham gets to hear this next one.
Master and Commander the Far Side of the World.
Oh, he gets to hear another one.
It's all Graham.
The Avengers.
Who the fuck? All right, for one point, if you guess it on this fourth name, Iron Man. Quite a puzzler, isn't it? Interesting set of credits.
A Beautiful Mind, Master and Commander,
The Avengers, and Iron Man
are his or her top four.
Anything?
I don't want to risk losing a point,
so I'm not going to say shit.
Okay, I don't think so.
I don't think you'd lose a point.
Oh, really?
I thought you lost one if you buzzed in with the wrong one.
You could take a swing at it.
Oh.
I'm all right with it.
Oh, I do know.
Yeah, it is tough.
Okay.
This is the bonus.
In the initial one, if you get it wrong, then it's negative point.
Okay, bonus.
Yeah, I mean, you've already gotten two wrong, and I didn't give you two negative points.
Can we steal?
Robert Downey Jr.
Can we steal?
Huh?
Can we steal?
No.
But if you're going to talk about that kind of stuff, I'd appreciate it if you'd use your microphone voice.
So the listeners know what a cheater you are.
No, you can't steal.
I said Robert Downey Jr.
Oh, okay.
Paul Bettany.
What the fuck?
Paul Bettany.
Yes.
God.
All right.
Graham is still in the lead with one point.
Whose top four begins with the Hurt Locker?
Martha.
What do you got, Martha?
Anthony Mackie.
That is correct.
Oh, nice.
Nice.
So I got to guess three more?
Now we need some more Mackies.
Eight Mile.
Give me three Mackies.
Eight Mile,
Captain America,
Winter Soldier,
Captain America, Civil War.
They went with Captain America, Civil War,
Captain America, the Winter Soldier,
and Million Dollar Baby.
Eight Mile was a good guess, though, right?
Yeah.
So that brings Andy to three points,
and he wins the game
Oh nice
Nice
That means you get to go first in our next game
And then
You will be followed by
Graham
And then Jacob
And each round We change who goes first followed by Graham, and then Jacob.
And each round, we change who goes first,
so everybody gets a chance to go first once,
but you get to go first this first time, Andy.
Okay. In Ron Bennington's Adjusted for Inflation Bureau game.
Yeah.
People go nuts for it.
People go nuts for it.
I'm going to name an actor.
Or actress, but that's what you call them when you're talking about both.
They're all actors.
You tell me what you think might be in their top three.
You want to get number one because that's worth three points.
Number two is worth two points.
Number three is worth one point.
Anything else?
No points.
Box office?
Box office.
Domestic.
Adjusted for inflation?
According to boxofficemojo.com.
Yeah.
You got to bring in that inflation factor.
But you get to guess individually one at a time. And you each get to pick a movie you can't repeat
Starting with you Andy
What do you think is in
Sarah Pauly's
Top three
Actress
Slash director
This is just the acting work of Sarah Pauly
oh shit
right
all the ones I'm thinking of would not
be my box office
really I can't I'm trying to think of
just name a movie she's in at least you'd be
in the hunt
sweet hereafter whoa children you'd be in The Hunt.
Sweet Hereafter.
Whoa.
Children in a bus crashing into the water.
Being home, you know,
that big box office winner.
Yeah.
Super fun movie.
It's a good movie.
Oh, it's really good.
Graham?
Jacob?
I'm going to admit what Graham won't.
I don't know who Sarah Pauly is.
Graham's sitting over there front like he knows, but he can't think of one.
I win?
When it's clear neither of us know who she is.
I mean the sweetheart after two.
I'm going to go with Divergent.
Full title.
Full title.
Sweater after two, the sweeter hereafter.
Do you have one, Graham?
Divergent.
Oh, that's always a good guess.
He fucking knew who she was.
They got some ladies in that movie.
Was that... That's just...
What?
She directed Take This Waltz and that movie with...
Now I can't...
From...
Something about her away...
Away from her?
Away from her.
Anyway. But she was also an actress in some movies I've enjoyed.
Coming in at number three, Splice.
That crazy-ass movie with Adrian Brody.
Number two is one of my all-time unheralded favorites, Go.
She was the girl selling drugs in Go.
Doug Liman.
Yeah, Doug Liman again.
And yeah, oh, the big one.
Number one.
Number one.
Dawn of the Dead.
Dawn of the Dead.
Written by our friend and directed by that other guy.
All right.
Yeah, no, she's a tough one.
And I thought you guys were good at this.
Here we go.
Comic-Con week.
We did better than
Steve-O would have. We're going crazy.
Well, I don't know. Steve-O, he might have pulled
out Dawn of the Dead for her. I don't know.
But let's try this next one
and we rotate over.
Graham gets to go first, followed by
Jacob, then Andy.
You had a great opportunity there,
Andy, when you got to go first.
You gave me the hardest fucking one, Doug.
Dawn of the Dead, man.
Should be the only movie you think of
when you think of her.
Graham.
Mila Jojovich.
That's fair.
Oh, yeah.
You know tons of movies
that she's in apparently.
I'm going to say
Resident Evil.
These are tough.
You got to get that exact title.
The first one.
That'd be so fun.
Why haven't they done that yet?
Named a movie The First One after a colon.
That'd be fun. All Why haven't they done that yet? Named a movie, the first one, after a colon. That'd be fun.
All right.
Well, all right.
Resident Evil.
Well.
Right?
There's been about eight of them.
I know.
I can't.
And they all have stupid subtitles.
Resident Evil.
Just say something that seems like it would be a Resident Evil.
Resident Evil. Apocalypse.
That seems right. That seems legit.
Alright,
Jacob. Wait, can I pick another
one? Yeah. Is that what you're going with?
Yeah, I'm going to go Fifth Element.
What the fuck kind of game are you running here?
Is this how to keep listing movies
until he likes one?
Yeah, I don't know what just happened
The fuck?
I thought you meant another Resident Evil title
When you said can I pick another one
I was like I realized
I think he's out
I'm not going to go with one that
I don't even know the full title
I know the fifth element is a real full title
Yeah but you gave
I think we should go with your first answer.
Which was Resident Evil.
No, it was Resident Evil Apocalypse.
Which might be a title.
Resident Evil is a general term.
Yeah.
Like this is kind of a Resident Evil environment.
Let's go to Jacob.
So what is his pick?
His pick is Resident Evil Apocalypse.
Okay.
I'm going to go with plain old Resident Evil.
Okay.
There was no other fanciness on the first title?
I think the first one was just called Resident Evil.
I'm going to go with that.
What do you got there, Andy?
I mean, there's extinction.
There's blood rain.
There's ultra...
No, no, no.
Ultraviolet was her...
Fifth Element is a tough... Ultraviol. It made like three dollars. Yeah
This inflation is because all those resident work
You picked resident evil one you picked apocalypse. I guess I'll go a fifth element. See if inflation helps it
Is apocalypse I'm curious to know if that's a real that is a real extinction too one. There's extinction, too. No, I didn't. I thought you were just riffing.
Coming in at number three, Zoolander.
Apocalypse.
What the fuck?
What the fuck?
Resident Evil Zoolander?
That's not a real title.
Coming in at number two, Resident Evil Apocalypse.
Fucking yeah, bitches!
Hashtag the fifth element.
Yeah, because number one is, of course, the fifth element.
I wasn't sure, though.
I'm glad it was.
No, I thought there was a chance
that you three were going to just completely
blow off fifth element.
Well, I had the chance.
I was surprised.
But I could let Graham upgrade
from a correct answer to a correcter answer.
I'm surprised, though, financially,
that it did better.
All right. answer. I'm surprised though, financially that it did better. Alright, so good
job.
Andy, this one's on you.
And yeah.
We'll see how
this goes.
Imogen
Poots.
Fuck you.
Wait, wasn't it on me this time?
Oh, is it?
Yeah, I think Andy went first.
I did go first.
I lost count.
Wait, he went first the first round.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right.
It is on you, Jacob.
Yeah.
And then Andy and then Graham.
I have a hard time with her, so I don't know why I was so eager to put it on myself. But it's in the spirit of sticking to the rules.
I'm going to go with the green room.
Okay.
It's the only one I can think of.
Right, but at least you thought of one that she's in.
She's not an easy one for sure.
I mean, Poots is a very memorable
last name.
But
you got anything, Graham?
You got any, Graham? You got any poots?
Fuck.
Fuck.
It's all like fucking weirdo indie film shit.
It's not going to be...
Yeah.
I tried to make a theme emerge.
If that helps you at all.
Probably not.
But the staff here is putting things away like we don't have a lot of time.
I think I know the theme.
Just hear the sound of glasses being put away.
And that's about it, folks.
Thanks for coming out.
Even the eagles looking around like, what's happening?
I got to get out of here.
So much Comic-Con pussy.
Can you imagine if there's just a bald eagle flying around?
Getting Comic-Con pussy? Yeah, Comic-Con.
Yeah, just getting all the pussy.
Like, there'd be none for the rest of us.
Because all the bald eagles would get it.
Who wouldn't fuck a bald eagle?
Got any poots?
Suicide Squad.
Okay.
I don't know.
You don't got a pooch?
The mummy?
I don't know what fuck Imogen Poots is.
Well, you might after I tell you these three of her top four.
She was one of the stars in the theme of this game,
which is everybody's been in a zombie movie.
She was in 28 Weeks Later.
And she was also in Need for Speed.
Is this the list?
Is this the order?
Number two, yeah.
And then number one,
I didn't know she was in this,
V for Vendetta.
Who would she have been in that?
Yeah, she's had a really sneaky career.
But whenever I notice her in anything, I always like her a lot. I always think she's had a really sneaky career, but whenever I notice her in anything,
I always like her a lot.
I always think she's really good.
So Need for Speed was Aaron Paul.
Fast car driving movie.
I didn't mind that movie.
Did you guys mind that movie?
Michael Keaton?
He was like, I'm the vulture.
This guy shrugged.
It was the visualization of that whole round.
Yeah.
No, I think the studio behind it thought that movie was just going to be the shit,
and then it didn't really pan out.
All right, let's do one more just for fun,
because now you guys are locked in on the theme,
and Andy's the winner of that game, officially.
You got to go first last time, Andy, so it's back to you again. But we'll start.
You got to go first last time, Andy.
So it's back to you again.
The films of Mr. Brad Pitt.
I'm first?
World War Z.
All right. Graham? World War Z Alright
Graham
There's so much more talking in the crowd
When it's for fun
Like even if he hears us
It's just for fun
Ocean's Eleven
Interview with the Vampire.
All right.
Inflation helps that one.
Yeah.
Coming in at number two.
Yeah, I'm switching the order around.
Just because it's fun.
Mr. and Mrs. Smith.
Sucker.
Yeah.
Not making the top three at number four.
World War Z.
You fell for it.
Number three, Interview with a Vampire.
And the number one on Brad Pitt's top movies adjusted for inflation, Ocean's Eleven.
Oh!
Graham wins nothing.
What?
Just bragging rights.
Good luck with that.
You're on the corner tomorrow.
That'll get you a lot of Comic Con pussy
with bragging rights, I've heard.
Right?
Me and that eagle are going to plow through
some CC poon tonight.
Some Imogen poots.
Hashtag CC poon.
Let's get it going.
The eagle has landed.
Yeah.
There's not enough sexual antics at Comic-Con,
in my opinion.
There's not enough drugs and there's not enough sex.
Other than that, I love Comic-Con in my opinion. There's not enough drugs and there's not enough sex. Other than that,
I love Comic-Con, but more drugs and more sex would be great.
I think it's like a nerd
swingers convention is what it is.
I don't know how much swinging they're doing.
Nerdy-gra. Okay.
Alright, I'm gonna
have to ask you to leave.
Too much thought
put into that.
But yeah, like I said, Andy was the official winner of that,
so that means he gets to go first in our final event this evening.
And it's called Last Mash Stanton.
I like a mash.
How does this one go again?
I'm going to name two names that I've cleverly smushed together into one name.
Like Brangelina, but with their first and last names.
Two different people?
Yeah, two individuals.
And then...
You guys are going to take turns naming movies that either one or the other was in
until you can't do it anymore.
Makes it a little broader, maybe.
Also helps me to bring in more obscure actors.
People are tired of when somebody in the audience
suggests Tilda Swinton and I'm like, fuck that.
Well, what if we could work Tilda Swinton in
with another name, you know?
well what if we could work Tilda Swinton in with another name you know
like if I did
Tilda Swintoni Danza
I'm not
doing that now it's just an example
I was going to say Tilda Swift
Taylor Swift because she was
in the movie right but what you just did is
not how this works at all
I was showing a bad example I'm telling you
that's the worst example.
But I appreciate it because that will help some people.
Probably not.
All right.
I'm going to tell you what it is.
Andy gets to go first.
Then Jacob.
Stop petting the fucking name tag, Graham.
He's fondling the cloudy goodness.
What is that?
What is that made out of?
Is it just like cotton?
Yeah.
Asbestos?
Yeah, so if the flashing lights catch on fire, it won't do anything.
Oh, my God.
We're in a basement.
Put that thing out.
Turn it off.
Also, whoever's the
professional photographer for this show,
we've just been fucking sitting here for
90 minutes.
You've taken enough pictures.
It looked the same for the entire show.
Oh, now he's got a pen in his hand.
What a unique... All right, so...
I'd like to see the whole album.
Start with the...
I said the order right.
Andy, Jacob, Graham.
Yes.
All right, here we go.
This is going to be an interesting one, I hope.
And I don't play along this time because I already know a lot of the titles.
Because you made it.
I made it.
And you each have one lifeline.
You can go to the person whose name tag you chose once.
Are you good?
She's good.
She has no idea what's about to happen.
But she says she's good.
Coriant, you ready to roll?
Oh, fuck.
She's like, I'm on it.
on it.
Pierce Brosnancy
Allen.
What?
Pierce Brosnancy
Allen.
Pierce Brosnancy Allen.
So it's the films of Nancy
Allen or Pierce
Brosnan.
Ready?
Starting with Andy.
Goldeneye.
That is correct.
Nancy Allen was one of the best of the James Bonds.
Tomorrow Never Dies.
Tomorrow Never Dies, says Jacob.
All right.
Graham.
The Terminator.
Wait.
Wait.
No.
He's out, right?
Who are we thinking about?
Linda Hamilton, maybe.
Nancy Allen.
Oh, fuck.
Or Pierce.
Okay, Andy, let's do this.
Let's do this Andy
I've had the worst week of sleep
Brosnan
That sounds like
You're pulling a Levine on us
I usually know so many Imogen Poots movies
I'm just sleepy
Sam Levine's always like I had a beer
He weighs 48 pounds
I mean that's a legitimate
thing.
It is a problem. Don't weight shame him.
Alright, but you know Pierce Brosnan from
GoldenEye, Tomorrow Never Dies, and
Nancy Allen from what?
It's still Graham.
What?
I'm still giving him a chance. He didn't
commit that hard to it. He hasn't done enough silence
in the show yet.
He committed pretty hard.
Oh, shit.
Oh, shit.
Oh, shit.
Batman fight.
Oh, shit.
Screen junkies versus comedy film nerds.
They're dumb.
It's on.
I got to win this.
That's some fucking Dark Knight on Dark Knight crime right there, brother.
Remember when I made that joke,
but I said Batman fight like 10 seconds ago?
I'm fucking tired.
I love you, Graham.
I'm tired and I had Sam Levine's beer.
How about...
Do it!
I don't...
This movie... How about... Do it!
This movie... You weren't crazy off with the Terminator.
Kind of.
How about the one...
Is there a time limit?
Yeah.
He reached it.
We are at it.
Is there a wrong answer limit?
Yeah, he did give a wrong answer.
The Thomas Crown Affair.
All right, you're out.
Do you want to use your
lifeline? Yeah, yeah.
Well, he's in the Thomas
Crown Affair.
Oh yeah, you're right. I was thinking
of Nancy Allen.
She's definitely not in that.
Neither of them are.
She's not in the Pierce Brosnan
movie? Okay.
Alright. Neither of them are in the's not in the Pierce Brosnan movie? Okay. All right.
Neither of them are in the Terminator.
TC affair.
All right.
Who's up next?
Me?
We went through three of you?
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
Die Another Day.
Yes.
Die Another Day.
No one should ever cheer that hard for Die Another Day.
Jacob.
Playing under protest if Graham wins,
the world is not enough.
The world is not enough.
Very good.
Now, Graham,
I'm assuming you want to go right
to your lifeline.
Save us a lot of trouble.
Unless you are sitting there thinking,
oh, maybe he was in a fourth James Bond movie.
Well, not what we did for.
He wasn't for.
That's the joke I was making 10 seconds ago.
Sorry.
Sorry.
Thank you, fucking joke police.
All right, Coriant.
The joke police, they're coming to your head.
What do you got, Coriant?
Corey, what do you got?
Mama Mia.
What do you say, Graham?
You want to go with that?
Yeah, I'd never see that movie in a million years.
Pierce Brosnan is in Mamma Mia.
Nice work.
No word on whether or not he's signed up for the sequel,
Papa Pia.
Hi, I'm an adult.
I make adult comedy.
You ready for me?
Yeah.
Let's throw Karen Allen a bone.
Indiana Jones.
Let's go with Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.
What?
Wait.
Oh, fuck.
Nancy Allen.
Well, then I get to go again
if he fucked up.
Yeah, that's right.
Fuck off.
Everybody gets
endless do-overs.
That's ridiculous.
I was just
I've already won the game.
Oh, fuck.
Dude, if you don't win, Jesse.
Endless do-overs.
I'll suck your dick. Yeah, I mean, I feel like Graham and I lost. It's Comic- Dude, if you don't win, Jesse. Endless do-overs. I'll suck your dick.
Yeah, I mean, I feel like Graham and I lost.
It's Comic-Con, so let's just keep going.
I want to keep going anyway.
Okay.
I want to do this.
Mrs. Doubtfire.
Okay, how about a movie Nancy was actually in?
Fucking Robocop.
Yay!
Oh, I realized it after I said it.
All right, Graham, is it over?
Robocop 2.
Oh, you motherfucker.
Yeah?
For bonus points.
For bonus points.
Who directed it?
I can't get bonus points.
Nancy Allen, fuck.
Oh my God. I have so many
Karen Allen movies
in my head
and I'm so tired
Oh shit
That was good
They're both so sleepy
A couple of sleepy
You were so fast
to want Graham out
for the wrong title
and then you said
a wrong title
and then it's a whole
new ball game
I think he won
Jacob clearly won the game
Oh Jacob's the best.
What the fuck?
At Comic-Con, pussy.
GrahamElwood.com
All right, let's go to my lifeline.
Slash hashtag CC pussy.
Give me a good hard one.
Go.
He's going to his lifeline.
She says nomads.
Yeah. Sure. Okay, nomads. Yeah.
Okay, nomads.
Pierce Brosnan is in a thing called Nomads?
Yeah, directed by John McTiernan.
Okay.
All right, people are into it.
People are screaming nomads.
Maybe they just want ads that have gnomes in them.
They missed those Travelocity ads.
Nomads!
Pierce Brosnan was in Mars Attacks.
Mars Attacks. Very good.
That was about when Veronica Mars
got really mad at somebody.
She attacked them with a Mars bar.
So, yeah, Mars Attacks, unfortunately, did not have a sequel.
It's Graham's turn, right?
That's what I mean.
I'm saying you're kind of in a hole here.
We all know the Mars Attacks prequel
though, folks.
There was, what the fuck
was that movie? Greg Kinnear, he plays a hit man.
Oh, yeah.
Fuck me.
That is not what it's called.
That is not the title they went with.
It's like the Bullfighter The matador some shit
God damn it
It's called
The matador
I don't know how the fuck you did that
But that is
That is correct
I remember the movie
I remember him going
Danny with a big bow.
It was a
oddly named movie.
But yeah. They go to a
bullfight in Mexico. Yeah.
He said there's Catholic countries. They're all
blessy-blessy, but no fucky-sucky. I know
lines from the movie.
Yeah, I hope that's a line
from the movie.
I hope we weren a line from the movie over if we weren't
riffing that who's next Jacob no I don't know okay Andy no no no wait did you
lose okay okay Andy's out. Jacob? No, Andy, go ahead. Go ahead. Are you out?
Andy?
I mean, I'll throw... Fuck.
Pierce Brosnan. Why am I not thinking of more Pierce Brosnan movies?
Let's try...
Also, when you were choosing
between Karen Allen and Indiana Jones movies,
you only had two to choose from, right?
I went Crystal Skull.
It was still interesting the way you're like,
oh, which way am I going to go with that?
I thought he maybe would remember what the earlier one was.
Oh, what?
I was doing that, yeah.
It's more recent.
Okay.
Was he in Mordecai?
Who?
Pierce Brosnan?
Maybe, but I don't know.
Who the fuck sat through Mordecai?
I know.
Like I remember with my mustache or something.
We were playing Johnny Depp the other night with Last Man Standing.
I couldn't fucking remember Mordecai.
I remember it began with the letter M and it sucked.
But that's all I could come up with.
And that's not enough in this game, Andy.
So I have to say, you're out.
Oh, that's so fun.
Yeah, you did great though.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, it's so fun.
Yeah, you did great, though.
Yeah.
I think Pierce Brosnan was in a movie called The January Man.
Mm-hmm.
Oh, he fucked up, too.
No?
What do you mean, though? That was a hard one.
That's right.
Wrong month.
The February Man.
No.
Shush, shush, shush, shush.
We're still playing a game up here.
Is Graham really going to win this?
No. Fuck that.
He did Terminator.
Jacob still gets a do-over.
You want to switch it to a different title?
Do you want to go to your lifeline?
I don't like this system.
Pick another month.
I'll go to my lifeline. Jesse, what do you got?
Carrie.
Okay, Carrie.
Yeah, Nancy Allen's in Carrie.
That's right.
She and John Travolta are the die in the car at the end.
Spoiler.
Graham.
It's been great having you.
Comedy film nerds.s is the podcast.
Yes, sir.
Earbuds, the podcasting documentary.
Podcasting documentary.
Yeah.
Captures the gritty world of podcasting.
All the violence.
All the sexual tension.
The seedy underbelly of LA Podcasts.
It's the total underbelly express.
Do you have a Nancy Allen or Pierce Brosnan movie that you could say out loud right now?
Yes, I do.
This is going to be very exciting if you do it.
It is called Oh shit
Here we go
RamElwood.com
Yeah they meet at that web server
It was fucking amazing
Nancy Allen is in
Porky's
That was a good try
Yep
With Leif Garrett
Leif Garrett isn't in Porky's
She isn't in Porky's
Kim Cattrall is in Porky's
From Sex and the City
Right but there's that scene where she calls
Her one friend and she has like a teeny part
And it's like a young Nancy Allen
and everyone's like, oh, Jeannie, get out of here.
And then that guy ties off his dick and they have a blowjob or whatever.
That's not her.
Yep, that was the one.
That's not her.
Graham Elwood's still in play.
Jacob, do you have another one to rub it in with?
I feel like she came, Peter Weller did not.
I feel like Nancy Allen came back for RoboCop 3. Was she? Maybe, yeah. That might be a possibility. I feel like she came, Peter Weller did not. I feel like Nancy Allen came back for RoboCop 3.
Was she? Maybe, yeah. That might be a
possibility.
We got a person over here clapping wildly.
So that verifies it.
That's how we do this on this show,
Andy. I know at Screen Junkies you have somebody
standing by with a laptop.
On this show, it's just based on my whims.
And it
feels like she'd be in three.
It feels like what the fuck she got better to do.
But you guys completely missed her amazing Brian De Palma oeuvre
with Dressed to Kill and Blowout.
I know she was married to him, but I couldn't think of which one she was in.
You missed both of those.
You missed she was in the classic comedy 1941.
And with Pierce Brosnan, you didn't mention one of my favorite Brosnan movies,
Dante's Peak.
Oh, fuck.
Linda Hamilton.
Linda Hamilton, yeah.
All the good ones get skipped over all the time,
but let's call it Jacob Siroff is our winner.
So you just got to win the last game
is all that really matters. The last game is, yeah. Well, you were on win the last game is all that really matters
The last game is, yeah, well you were on
at midnight last night and discovered
that that last joke is all that really matters
Well you gotta beat one person
to get to the final two, but then once you're there
that last joke is all that matters
Plus I was totally hustling you guys anyway
Yeah, no, you were good
Oh, and it's
November Man.
Okay.
Is that the correct?
Yeah.
All right.
What other Nancy Allen Pierce Brosnan's did we miss?
What other Pierce Brosnan?
No Escape.
No Escape.
Taylor of Panama.
Taylor of Panama.
Lawnmower Man.
Lawnmower Man.
Oh, shit.
Fucking world's end.
Pierce Brosnan, that's a good poll.
What?
Lawnmower Man.
He said Lawnmower Man.
Percy Jackson, The Lightning Thief.
Who was in that?
Pierce Brosnan?
Pierce.
Oh, that's depressing. That just sounds like a real was in that? Pierce Brosnan? Oh, that's depressing.
That just sounds like a real
bummer. Poor Pierce Brosnan.
He's in that new one with Jackie Chan that looks kind of good.
Oh, yeah? Yeah. There's an action movie
with Jackie Chan and Pierce Brosnan.
They are doing a sequel to Mamma Mia, and he will be
back singing horribly.
And
I love that dude.
He's great.
Jacob, congratulations.
Where's your person you're playing for?
It's Jesse. Where are you at? Oh, cool.
Where are you at? Come get your prizes, dude.
Jesse!
Wait, no wonder he was saying she was in Robocop 3.
It was the other guy. It was his friend.
He's your man.
Okay, we verified it? Okay, good.
Here's your prizes, dude.
Do you want this thing, too?
I'll sign the DVD.
If you just come back there, I'll sign it.
Oh, yeah, and there's all this bag, too.
Jacob, could you?
Thank you.
Great job.
Look at all that stuff.
Nice job.
The revenge of the syrup.
I feel bad.
She bribed me.
Can I invite her to my party on Saturday?
Yes.
Okay, sure.
How's that for a deal?
I should have won.
You guys can come to Screen Junkie Central,
House of Blues, Saturday.
Saturday, Screen Junkie Central, House of Blues.
I should have won.
I should have had that.
I'm too tired.
Well, do you want to give her the 20 bucks back?
Well, I was going to do that too, but...
That's very nice of you.
Wait, wait, wait.
Settle down.
I got to get her shithead off the back.
Will it pull off?
All right.
Do we have to give her the vodka back, though?
Do you want the vodka?
Yeah, I'll take that.
There you go.
Hey, fight, fight, fight!
All right.
I can't believe the $20 is still on the table.
This is cute, Doug.
It's absolute citrone, but she wrote Tito's on it for you
Very nice
Alright so there's your name tag
Don't pull it away yet
Because I gotta remember your shithead
At the end
Graham past years down
And tell us your plug sir
Promote yourself
Yeah Earbuds the Podcasting Documentary
Is available at Comedyfilmers.com
as a download and a DVD.
It'll be going wide in the fall.
And then, of course,
my new YouTube show, The Political Vigilante.
Fuck yeah.
YouTube.com.
Everything's at grahamelwood.com.
Go there. Remember?
Remember?
Jacob Seroff,
what are you doing tomorrow?
Can you come back as the winner
and try to maintain your crown?
Well, since my only plug was grabmelwood.com,
that works out really well for me.
So let's do that and I'll be back tomorrow.
And that's my plug also.
Right on.
Fucking not a lot of love for the champ, guys.
Really?
Hey, you've won third square.
Bravo, sir.
All right.
There's a champ here?
No, I mean, I don't know.
It's just, technically, Jesse.
But, you know, I just thank you to the Batmans for playing.
It means more when you beat good people.
Where's Rachel?
That was an exciting one.
You're right.
Where's Rachel? That was an exciting one. You're right. Where's the drinker?
So that's what that feels like.
That was my favorite.
When somebody finally disappeared on him,
you really had it turned on him.
But he's alone by himself, speaking to himself,
but just to be safe, uses the Batman voice.
I'm alone talking to myself, hello.
Have you seen Dunkirk yet?
No, is he in it?
I know, but I just...
Is Batman in it?
A lot of my critic friends don't like it,
and all the Nolan boys are like,
Who dare you?
Nolan is perfect! Who doesn't like it? Who would you say doesn't like it, and all the Nolan boys are like, Who dare you? Nolan is perfect!
Who doesn't like it?
Who would you say doesn't like it?
The Nolan boys.
There's critics.
All the Nolan fanboys won't let people say that.
But critics are saying they don't like it.
No, it's like 98%.
It's apparently beautiful.
I haven't seen it.
It's apparently beautiful, but emotionally, the characters are just all,
there's no character.
Oh.
It's just a technical.
You mean it's like a Christopher Nolan movie? no emotion any of the characters and so anyone who's
criticizing people haven't seen the film has anyone seen it yet
previews they've been previewing a little bit yeah well Dunkirk check it
out if you like fun killing it but it's like super Valyrian is really cool
looking Valyrian yeah oh you mean the sixth element?
Yeah, exactly.
I thought that too, but it's actually pretty fun.
Yeah, all right.
Well, fifth element was fun.
I'm down for all of it.
Summer.
Yay, Comic-Con.
Yeah, we didn't come here to trash that kind of movie.
We came here to celebrate it and to use the Deadpool sign to cover up that weird clock.
Can you be here tomorrow night, Deadpool?
Do that again?
I'll get a different one.
Don't worry about it.
Oh, no.
One more time for all of my guests.
Graham Elwood.
Thank you.
Jacob Seroff.
Andy Signore.
Doug Benson.
That's me.
CCP.
Go get some Comic-Con poon.
Yeah, don't forget, for this episode, hashtag it CCPoon.
And as always...
Wait, Andy's got to take care of this first.
Trying to wrap up a show here.
He's whipping out his phone.
Are you like...
Andy, are you like looking for three ways?
Is that what you're excited about?
Excited about these two?
Here you go.
Come to my party, you guys.
Both of you.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, shit.
He's going to make you drink some Kool-Aid.
Yeah, he's at the party.
Yeah.
It's a lovely couple.
No, that's cool.
It's all good.
They're into it, she says.
They're ready to have the Thomas Crown Affair with Andy.
So you gave them your phone and said type in your info?
Give me their names.
I'm going to put them on the list.
Yeah, no, that's great.
Doug's going to be there, too.
It's a great system.
Yeah, I'll be at the party.
There's going to be a lot of weed there.
Everywhere you go, there's a lot of weed.
All right.
Then I guess I'm not going to the party.
I could just go wherever I go.
There's your phone back.
Can I wrap up my show now?
Yes.
Because look at that clock
It says I've got 1 minute and 30 seconds
You did it really well
Yeah but that clock's not
I don't think that's right
Oh they fixed it so that it's right
Is I supposed to leave?
It's totally right now
No well yeah
No no no you don't have to go
Every guest does whatever they want
As you can see Jacob likes to stay
Well we've had discussions
About what the protocol is
Yeah yeah it's like
You can't
You know
They either leave or they stay
It doesn't matter
I'm staying now
I'm just using this
I'm excited about
That there's still one minute left to go
So I'm just using the time
You know they can't see that
When they listen
No but they can hear the fact
That I'm talking longer
While they're sitting there thinking,
I wish this would go longer.
Even if it was just for 46 more seconds.
I want it in my life.
As always,
stepping in water while wearing socks is a shithead.
water while wearing socks is a shithead.
And at midnight
ending is a shithead.
Now it's time for
Doug to watch another talkie.
Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess
makes him cocky. There's
no room in his heart for
you, cause Doug loves
movies!