Doug Loves Movies - Bill Squire, Geoff Tate and Andy Wood guest
Episode Date: December 29, 2023Doug welcomes Bill Squire, Geoff Tate and Andy Wood to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info....
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Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming baby, sticky seeds with 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth.
There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug loves movies!
Hey, hey, hey everybody! My name is Doug and I love movies. This is Doug Loves Movies, and this particular episode is the monthly bonus episode, and we're recording it on Thursday, December 28th, 2023.
Only one more show left this year. We're taping this Saturday, December 30th at the Punchline in Sacramento at 420.
My guests today, though, are two current champs and one eternal champion in my heart, and they are Bill Squire, Jeff Tate, and Andy Wood.
Hello.
Hey.
Hello.
Hello.
Let's meet them all individually and alphabetically by first name he is a jeopardy
champion a comedian a science lover he is andy wood hey glad to be here where are you andy and why i am in joshua tree where i reside um 90 of the time now
yeah you crazy desert dweller it's pretty weird i mean i definitely jinxed myself when i moved
out here right when covet hit because i was like maybe i'll just wait out this whole covet thing
in the desert and turn into a desert weirdo. And then four years later,
here I am still. And the Wi-Fi out there is great, I understand. Sure. Always good.
Yep. Well, thank you for being with us today. Our next guest won in his very first appearance on this show a couple of months ago in Cleveland in November at Dunlap's Corner Bar.
And his name is Bill Squire.
Hey, Bill.
Hey, I'm also in Joshua Tree, but Cleveland, the Joshua Tree of the Rust Belt.
I see.
I see.
Every area deserves to have its own Joshua Tree because, you know, you two needs more than one place to sing about.
Have you come down from the high of winning in November, Bill?
No, I've just been riding that. Like that's everywhere I go.
I tell people, even if they don't ask, especially if they don't ask, I say, I won.
Doug loves movies, and I beat Ramon.
And he's been on the show a bunch of times, and I haven't.
So that's a big deal to me.
Yeah.
And they're like, sir, why are you at the steak here?
Well, I appreciate you joining us once again. And good luck today because also joining us is a man who will be joining me to interrupt Fast X at the Great Star Theater in San Francisco as part of SF Sketch Fest on Sunday night, January 21st.
SFSketchFfest.com for tickets.
His name, nobody's going to chant it today,
but it does happen every time he appears in person.
Jeff Tate.
Hey, Jeff.
Hello.
Thank you very much.
We should pause so that people can finish their chanting in their cars.
Right.
Everybody should practice chant for the next time they see you in person.
Is it,
is it just this one syllable first and last?
Is that why it's so chantable?
Is that why I don't get chanted?
It's true.
It is very chantable,
but the audiences at my shows are so nice that if you bring up,
Hey,
it's not fair of you to chant for Jeff and not these other people,
they will try to chant for other people, but it true like the more complicated the name the harder it is to
chant it uh yes but jeff have you ever done stand-up somewhere where it made the other
comedians go what the fuck is happening when audience members just started chanting your name
uh yeah every every single time it happens
what i do stand up i did have to explain it generally
yeah because the other comics are just like god damn they they like him this much and he just
walked out on stage you know it's crazy it's very fun when it happens and then I bomb. Yeah. Oh, my God.
Tell us about those times, please.
One was a couple weeks ago.
Yeah, I'm sure.
You never know when the bombs are going to go.
You know, you could do stand up forever, but you just can't see it coming a lot of times.
Or you do see it coming, but you just still have to go through with it, you know.
So you just won the show a couple episodes back i think and so you're on this is like your third appearance on this
winning streak yes nice um so uh i should say i'm to lie, Jeff, your competitors are formidable.
Yes.
This is like, this is, you know, Sam Levine aside,
this is like potentially like top three players,
at least of people who have been on the show recently.
But before we play the games today,
let's go to Recommendation Nation where I have you each recommend a movie.
But since it's the end of 2023, Let's go to Recommendation Nation, where I have you each recommend a movie.
But since it's the end of 2023, I'd like each of you to tell me your favorite movie of 2023.
Was I asking that yet when you were on the last time, Jeff?
No.
Okay, good.
So you don't have to double up.
Or maybe you will double up.
I don't know.
I don't remember what you recommended last time.
But let's start with Andy. What was your favorite movie in 2023 dude i'm not saying this is the best movie but the most fun i had watching a movie this year was no hard feelings the jennifer
lawrence sex comedy i will not fight you on that i watched it on a plane so they cut out the the they didn't cut out the crazy nude
scene but it's just like everything moves quicker and you just don't you really don't see anything
but you get the idea that everything that happened they do it's a pretty good edit i think it's
probably an edit made by the filmmakers and not just randomly made for airlines but uh so i watched
it all the way through and didn't get to see that part and then uh my
girlfriend hadn't seen it yet so i was like let's you know i'll watch it again if you want to watch
it and uh you know it wasn't that you know it wasn't that much like oh wow it's crazy to actually
see the nudity you know it didn't change it that much really no no but uh bless her for being not only hilarious throughout the movie
but then also that ballsy to do a naked fight scene i would i would say this without that
scene i still thought it was just a great like legitimately funny oh yeah and the rest of the
movie can the rest of the movie can follow it because i'm sure that like the you know the
reaction to it must have been explosive
in in theaters when people did go unfortunately it's seen as a rom-com so i don't know how often
it had like a packed theater it was mostly you know awkward couples watching it probably but
um i yeah it's just the jokes and and her demeanor jenn Lawrence, please. I know she listens to this show. Please make more,
like keep doing comedy.
Yes.
You know,
I,
I legitimately was blown away by how good she is in.
I didn't know she could do comedy and it had so many laugh out loud
moments.
The character is great.
Also.
I feel like we don't see a lot of characters like that.
Like I it's,
it's great to see people breaking down walls like i think women should
be able to play kind of shitheads kind of fuck ups you know it's more interesting than having it be
just like you're a flawless hero out of the gate like no that's not interesting storytelling and
yeah she was so great in it i liked uh i like the fact that her her sympathetic the character
you're most sympathetic to is her ex-boyfriend because she's obviously just treating him horribly.
And he's played by the guy that's always the shithead in other things because Evan Moss, Backrack or whatever his name is, he, you know, on girls, he was just insufferable.
And he's also pretty annoying in The Bear.
I haven't seen The Bear. I got to bear oh my god dude it is both great and frustrating because it's just really
it really takes you into the horrible world of uh chefs and kitchen you know restaurants and
kitchens i mean it's it's brutal um and the family the family thanksgiving or christmas i think it's
probably thanksgiving i'm not sure anyway the family gathering episode in season two is just
some of the most brutal television uh i've ever seen all right so that's your uh that's your
choice no hard feelings i love it i love it okay bill love it. Okay. Bill Squire.
What was your favorite movie in 2023?
I mean, it's hands down.
Got to be the machine,
right?
Really?
No.
I don't know you well enough to know that that was a joke
that was so funny
Bill I assume you were in it
that's what the joke was
I'm just trying to get on the tour next year
my favorite
there's movies that I want to see
I haven't seen the Iron Claw yet
I was meaning to see that this week
that's going to be towards the top of my list
but No One Will Save You was probably my favorite just because it was so
like,
I thought it was going to be one thing.
It was very different than what I thought it was going to be.
And it was just like a pretty like gut wrenching thriller.
You people responded to it.
I,
for some reason it didn't really work for me,
but I feel like like you know i just
saw that uh silent night uh recently uh attempts a very similar thing where there's no dialogue
and uh willie's willie's wonderland with nick cage he everyone else spoke in the movie but his
character just never spoke even though he's in
very long sequences of the movie
with other people standing around.
So
I just think I'm averse
to that. I just think that
I want people
to talk in a movie.
I do talk radio
four hours a day.
Yeah, you're tired of the blah blah blah
yeah you just want to watch
a quiet place movies all day
exactly
especially
also because you don't know me that well
this is a joke
also a woman being quiet for two hours
sign me up
but that's the thing is all those movies I mentioned, though, I just realized are a great recommendation for when somebody is on a plane and they don't they have access to their imagery, but they don't have headphones.
Yeah.
So you don't have to hear it.
I mean, of course, you would want to hear the action noises and the music in those movies.
But still, if you got to watch it without without sound that would be a movie to watch you know for the artist
all right i feel like if i'm in an airport and i don't have headphones i'm gonna pay the 200
dollars to buy beats out of a vending machine right because it's just it's too miserable to
be on a plane without headphones these days it is is, and the people that do decide that you need to hear the game they're playing
or the movie they're watching,
there should just be a hole that drops them out of the plane,
but safely to the ground, they have a parachute.
All right.
Yeah, yes.
I hate them, but I don't want to see them harmed.
Jeff?
This is tough.
There was a lot of great movies this year,
but I'm going to have to go with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,
Mutant Mayhem.
Whoa.
Teenage Mutant M-T-M-N.
Wasn't one of the movies just the initials?
Oh, yeah. There was those. T-M-N what's wasn't one of the movies, just the initials.
Oh, yeah. There was those T.M. or something like the early 2010s or whatever.
There was a couple that were like heavy CGI and they were like Michael Bay produced them or something.
Those were not good. But this one was awesome.
It's animated. It's written by talented comedy uh writers i get i would assume i haven't seen it but i have pretty much just heard good things about it it's very entertaining and they they actually
feel like teenagers and uh not not just like grown-ups and is that important to you Jeff? no it just fits
the animation is cool
it's got that comic book style
Spider-Man thing
yeah it's dope
does Vanilla Ice appear
in any capacity?
no but that song is referenced
they do reference
the Go Ninja Go part
I'm going to see this movie for sure Do reference the Go Ninja Go part.
I'm going to see this movie for sure.
I think it'll be enjoyable.
It's produced by Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg,
and they rarely let me down, those guys.
So I'm into it.
These are three really interesting choices, like actual fun nothing you know nothing too heavy i mean i
know that no one will save you is intense but uh these are all uh i think they're all on streaming
too now i know no hard feelings and no one will save you are and if mutant man isn't it's definitely
available for on demand but i think it's going to be on streaming now or soon it's
on paramount plus oh right now yeah all right and delta flights so i don't know what you're into but
if you have paramount plus or you're about to fly on delta okay check out uh tmnt mutant ahem
then i'm then i'm all set because i'm i'm good i Because I've got paramount flights.
Flying on Delta is not.
I think I might be able to live the rest of my life never flying on Delta.
I might.
Every once in a while you'll get fucked over where your airline is overbooked or something.
Or you miss a connection and they'll just
put you on another you know another carrier uh that's the only times i ever fly delta okay here
we go all right uh yeah yeah no it was not uh not very pluggy but um i can't believe none of you
said the new uh you know spider-man across the multiverse because
that that keeps coming up in these uh conversations i have with people uh people are crazy for the
spidey spidey multi the first one i think legit should have been nominated for best picture of
2018 or 19 like it's too bad animation gets second billing but this one is just not as good as the
original it's good but the first one is so good this one is just not as good as the original.
It's good, but the first one is so good.
The second is just kind of cluttered.
It's still cool to watch, but like...
Interesting, because people love it,
and they claim it's better than the first, you know?
I was annoyed that it ended on a cliffhanger.
Oh, yeah, that's weird.
Because I was like, oh, now I got to see another one of these,
which is fine, but I was going and hoping to get like a full story arc and then like as i realized we were in the
theater for so long i'm like oh this isn't gonna end how i thought it's gonna end do you mean do
you mean with an ending soon yeah all over again like a part of a movie right part of right what
is this uh i mean that's why I didn't say Mission Impossible
because it's
I can't put the first half of this Mission Impossible
movie is not better than an entire
Ninja Turtles movie
right
I hear you
well let's go to a break
let's calm down everybody
and
we'll be back to play some games
in a few moments.
We are back and the first game we're going to play today,
out of two, is called ABCD's Nuts.
Douglas Movies is coming to the Improv in Orlando, Florida
on Saturday, January 6th at 420.
So in honor of that coming up and as a way to plug it
let's spell orlando and by spell i mean andy's first he'll name any movie that begins with o
then we'll move to bill he gets the letter r then jeff letter l and then all the way through the
word orlando it's pretty short but
if you can't think of one you're out
so I doubt that's going to happen with these three players
but
if you match the title that I
wrote down in advance that
fits a particular theme
that will be more clear as we
go along maybe
if you match me
then you just automatically win the game.
We go to commercial and come back
for our next game.
It's kind of like Squid Game
in the way something could just happen
and end things
very early.
So exciting.
Yeah.
So we're going alphabetical by first name so andy is first up in spelling orlando the first o in orlando
one movie i know you just have to take a shot in the dark but it's always fun
i think jeff might have gotten the first movie one time. I'm going to say, oh, brother, where art thou?
Which is, that's how you have to, I don't know if you remember this,
but back when you went to go see that movie in the theater,
you had to say it that way to get the ticket.
I remember, boy, they were real sticklers then.
Oh, brother, they were real sticklers then. How old brother were they?
I like the Winnie the Pooh version,
Oh, Bother Where Art Thou, a little better.
Oh, bother.
Thanks for coming by, Eeyore.
Okay, the old movie that I wrote down,
I mean, how classic is this?
Office Space. I wanted, how classic is this? Office Space.
I wanted you to have a chance.
You know what I mean?
We're on to the letter
R and
Bill.
I'm going to go with
Ratatouille just because that's
what I had, but I'm trying to figure out this
theme, though.
That is not on theme
potential themes
for my R Ratatouille of course
I always love a Ratatouille reference
but I went with a motion picture
called Runaway Jury
because it fits
the theme
the next letter to Jeff is L.
Take the L, Jeff.
I'm going to say Love Actually.
Go to L, Jeff.
Okay.
Love Actually is a fun reference right now
because we're just coming out of the Christmas season.
And I just want to say to anybody
who already misses the Christmas version of the Christmas season. And I just want to say to anybody who already misses the Christmas version of
the theme song with Ricky and Kate,
you know,
I just play it.
I feel like Christmas is over when Christmas day happens,
you know,
or like I sort of think about it that way.
So we went back to the regular theme for this episode,
but if you miss that theme,
just go back to one of the last episodes in december
and uh you know you know i mean engineer your own uh show what's happening oh letter l here we go
and uh i wrote down liberty heights liberty heights liberty heights yeah what what is happening a is the next letter
and this happens sometimes gotta just go with the flow because the theme i couldn't find a movie
that begins with a that fits the theme so this one's a tv show andy uh for the letter a is a tv
show i am not seeing any pattern,
but I guess it'd be dumb to name a movie
because I'm never going to get your...
Oh, man.
I had my movie and now I'm trying to think of an A TV show.
The A team.
All right.
Well, in this game, we call movies that begin with a though. We call that a T.
Go ahead. You can try again. I won't
disqualify you.
This can't be hard.
Another World.
Another World.
The TV soap opera called Another World. Another World. The TV soap opera
called Another World.
I thought Another World.
A different world.
I meant the Cosmic Dino.
A different world.
You're switching your answer
from Another World
to a different world.
To a different world.
Lock it in.
Yeah.
That is the correct answer
it is
it is a different
world but I was so excited
when you got it wrong with another world
because that would have been such a sweet
burn
I don't know what the theme is how did I get it right
because you know
now I'm realizing when I
devised this I sort of thought well who's going to think of any TV shows that begin with a you know, now I'm realizing when I devised this, I sort of thought, well, who's going to think of any TV shows that begin with A?
You know, Alice.
What else begins with A?
Arnie Miller.
As the world turns.
Yeah, another soap.
Anyway, so congratulations.
The rest of the movies, because the rest of them are movies,
are New Jersey Turnpikes
for N, and then D is drumline
and then for O
I couldn't think of something
I couldn't find a movie that applied to the theme
so I just wrote down office
space again
I think I know what the theme is
what is it?
are they Orlando Jones movies?
they are
oh my god
oh my god oh my god
so that's how that's what a brainiac you are is you won without even knowing what the theme is
i didn't know he was even in a different world i wouldn't have thought he was already
well he also plays small parts in a lot of these things, you know, like a couple of them are like very early on his career, you know.
I mean, even off space.
Yeah, exactly.
Office space.
I wouldn't even remember he's in it.
But congratulations, Andy.
You won that game.
That was very, very, very impressive.
Do you want to hear something unlikely and also dumb
sure i had worked ahead and knew that d was going to be mine and i was legitimately i swear to god
i was going to say double take which is just a different orlando jones movie that starts with d
that's right i picked i went with drumline just to give you guys a break at that point. You know, like maybe somebody would win.
I didn't know it would happen in a different world.
I can't believe this is the weirdest. Yeah.
I was even bummed that I had to put a TV one in there.
But like, you know, it's just such a funny concept to me to like say, let's play this game with a word Orlando.
And then it's Orlando Jones movie.
I was very committed to making
that happen.
I look forward to being back in
Orlando on
Insurrection Day.
We will be...
I know. It sucks to have
a show on January 6th.
It should be a day of mourning yeah i probably shouldn't do it you're
right you're saying i should cancel this show i mean i always want to spend it with family so i
can see why being on the road for january 6th that's true nobody wants to travel on jan 6th
because you know everybody's headed somewhere. It's crazy.
Just get a bunch of guest speakers, go last,
and then have everybody march up the mall.
No.
Well, that'd be so funny.
We're going to get the audience to be a march or something i've never tried to do that
like andy kaufman used to do at his live shows i even got to see him do it in person one time at
uc san diego um he was doing a show there in the auditorium and he gets the entire crowd to like
conga outside the building and go around the building and then you know eventually come back in
but just creates this gigantic stupid conga line for no reason and uh and i wanted the show that
i went to i didn't want to get in the conga line but i went outside with the conga line
and i just ran up to the front along where andy kaufman was at the front of the line and just moved along right next to him.
And Andy Kaufman looked at me with a super panicked face,
like, how do we get back in?
It wasn't like you could just go directly around.
So it was just funny to be trying to give directions
to a guy that has a 500-person conga line behind him.
All right, we're going to take take a break we'll be right back we are back and uh during the last live audience show at the lab at the hollywood improv we played a game and when I emailed you guys about today,
I asked you to make sure
that you did not listen to that show,
the last live show we did.
It might have been the last show we did.
Yeah.
I asked you not to listen to it
because of what I want to try today,
but Andy, I never got a confirmation. Did you listen to the to it because of what I want to try today but Andy I never got a confirmation
did you listen to the last episode
to prep for today?
sometimes people just do that
they'll just listen to the most recent one
and I wanted to make sure
none of you guys did that
because we played a game
I didn't think it was easy
but I expected my guest
to do better at it than they did.
It was almost a little scary how they just, we weren't really connecting.
It might have been that it was too Christmassy, and I had three guests that just happened to live those kind of lives where you're not that into Christmas.
You know, so you maybe don't know Christmas movies that well.
But anyway,
I just wanted to play the game again
with you guys
and see if it
goes better or the same
as it did the other
night. And I hope
that the listeners will find that an entertaining
idea instead of a, what?
You're just going to play the same game again i think it's interesting to see what's going to happen uh with a new set of
players playing this it's a game i had played once before and uh jeff was one of the uh it was the last time Jeff won, he was involved in it. Uh, it's called IMDB XMAS.
Uh, and it was suggested by a listener and,
uh, on the page of every movie, uh,
represented on the internet movie database, IMDB, uh,
they list the top four cast members
that are quote-unquote top billed above every movie.
So Andy's going to go first,
and then we'll go to Jeff, then to Bill,
and then eventually back to Andy.
Andy, I'll name the first actor actress listed uh in there uh this
particular christmas movie or you know holiday movies uh top four and then you make your first
guess or or pass if you don't have a guess and then then Jeff will guess, and Bill will guess. If nobody gets it, then I'll give you guys the second name, et cetera.
And we'll work through until all four names,
which when we played last time, four of these titles,
the contestants got to hear all four names,
and then still didn't come up with a title title uh there was the correct title so and it just
freaked me out like what's that they got none of these they got two of them and i don't think they
yeah those two were like one of them was off of the first name and the other one was off of
maybe also the first name yeah so a couple of them ended up
but the you know it was it was just it was weird so let's give it a try and thank you to everybody
for indulging me and uh we'll start with andy good luck g. What movie do you think, for its number one slot in their top four build,
that is a Christmas movie, so to speak, stars number one Jim Carrey?
I think it's just called The Grinch, right?
Or is it The Grinch Who Stole Christmas?
The Grinch.
You're going with that. we want an exact title here,
and you're going with The Grinch.
I think the movie was just The Grinch.
The Grinch.
Okay.
Incorrect.
Jeff.
I will say
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
I don't even want to
dignify it with a oh what the hell
incorrect
Bill Squire
I believe it is Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas
That is the correct
title of the one
of the movie starring
Jim Carrey but that is not
the movie I am looking for
Andy
second
on the top four build
Gary Oldman.
Oh, ah, I think on a past,
this came up on a past show and I forgot if there's a special like after the colon.
I think it's some version of a Christmas Carol colon Robert Zemeckis,
horrible animated.
Oh yeah. A Christmas Carol. I don't knowis. Horrible animated. Oh, yeah.
A Christmas Carol.
I don't know if it has a subtitle to it.
You're just going with just straight up a Christmas Carol.
I hope it's just that.
That is correct.
Nice.
Yeah.
Colin Firth and Steve Valentine are the other names in the top four. And that's the first of a few that my guests looked at me like they had no idea that that movie ever existed.
They completely gaslighted me.
And I had to be like, it was animated.
Zemeckis was on an animated kick.
He did Beowulf and Polar Express, or as I call it, you know,
Fast Train to Hell.
Or I should say Slow Train to Hell would be more insulting, I guess.
But anyway, congratulations for getting that one, Andy.
Now we move on to round two.
Jeff gets to go first.
we move on to round two.
Jeff gets to go first.
And the first person listed
on IMDb is Mr.
Bruce Willis.
Hmm.
I'm going to say
Die Hard 2.
Die Harder.
That is correct.
Yes!
Well done, yeah. That's correct. Yes! What?
Well done, yeah.
See, that's the kind of gameplay I look for,
is that everybody blurts out Die Hard,
but you've got to be a real player to stop and think for a second
and then say Die Hard 2,
because it also takes place at Christmas.
And, of course, it also stars Bruce Willis.
They list William Athertonton bonnie bedelia and then
reginald bell johnson as the next three but i think all three of those would you agree jeff
that they are just top build just because they were all in the previous one because aren't
aren't their parts all kind of reduced in die hard 2 definitely um yeah william atherton should
not be second build and uh reginald vel johnson is like in one
scene he like calls him on the phone and that's it yeah he has to show how to use a fax machine
yeah and i do i do it was gonna be a rough ride like i knew that like it's a fine movie you know
and renny harland's not not so bad but i i you know it's definitely a let you know it's not as good as die hard it's just
not uh but that was the first sign to me that it wasn't as good as die hard when he's you know
said just the facts ma'am oh yeah yeah it does have one of my favorite lines in a movie is when
he uh bruce willis yells it at dennis franz or whatever it says, what sets off the metal detectors first, the lead in your ass
or the shit in your brains?
I thought it was a good sequel.
I mean, it's not as good
as the original Die Hard, but the
ambush scene where
all the SWAT team are going in all
cocky and they get blown away by the painters working
on Christmas Eve, like, this is normal is normal yeah and what's you know the bad guy doing his naked uh you know
moves his naked yoga at the beginning is weird uh and he's always great but like just the stakes
are so much higher an entire commercial airline flight blows up like very early on and it's just like
okay you know nakatomi plaza there were some casualties but holy shit an entire plane to me
it's like when walter white was inadvertently responsible for an entire plane crashing in
uh breaking bad that was the where i i still love the, but I did not have any, you know, I hated the character henceforth after that happened, you know.
Well, I mean, it's because of a mourning father who was tangentially responsible, right?
Yeah.
No, it was definitely tangential, but he still, you know, didn't seem to really slow him down in his behavior at all.
That speech you gave when he compared it to the
tenerife crash was great though he's like talking to high school gymnasium there have been worse
crashes than this you guys i also like that he he hurt and destroyed so many lives but people
are like but skylar was mean i hate skylar oh no that's what's so funny is he ended up like people
loved him and hated her and she's not
the one doing all the horrible things.
She's just, you know, reacting to it.
Yeah, I'm like,
I'm her attitude.
Yeah.
Yeah, it was weird.
For sure. Okay, round
three, Jeff and Andy are on the
board and Bill gets to go
first on this one.
Top build. What movie do you think this is
that stars
Kurt Russell
I'm gonna go
the way this show works
I'm gonna go with
The Christmas Chronicles
that's a full title I believe so the Christmas Chronicles.
That's a full title?
I believe so.
Locking it in?
Yeah.
I'm sorry, that's incorrect.
Dang.
Andy?
I'm just gonna take a stab at the Christmas Chronicles 2.
You wanna lock that in? I don't know if there is one but yes
you're saying the christmas chronicles 2 yes i am
yes
uh i'm to say Tombstone.
Hang on, let me get my noise ready.
I'm sorry.
Did you know the working title of Tombstone was Mustache Parade?
Oh, I didn't know that.
That's cool.
I still would have seen it.
Right?
Okay, we're back.
Wait, Bill, get another shot at this. My turn.
Okay, all right.
Oh, I got to give you the second name.
I'm sorry.
Oh, yeah, please.
Yeah, because we're back to the beginning. Okay, the second name. I'm sorry. Oh, yeah, yeah, please. Yeah, because the second, we're back to the beginning.
Okay.
The second name after Kurt Russell is Goldie Hawn.
Oh, okay.
Oh, what is it called?
Overboard.
No.
Oh, no.
We're in two movies together?
Andy.
I don't know if this might have taken place around
Christmas time, but Captain Ron.
See, you guys are feeling this
in a fun way
at this point.
Because you are guessing titles.
Yes.
You know what I mean? You're not just looking at me like, what are you talking about?
Jeff?
Man, I...
Oh, what the fuck?
Okay, so it's both of them.
So I'm going to say The Chronicles of Christmas 3.
All right, back to you, Bill.
I'm going to go ahead and give both names because they're a little, they're no help.
They're no help, the remaining names.
That's what I should have done, I think,
with this game, is I think it should have started with
the most obscure of the four and worked up to,
but I also just thought it was fun to have people start guessing just based
off of the,
the first name anyway,
because these last names are just like who,
uh,
Darby camp and Julia Dennis Denison,
but it doesn't even matter if I mispronounce their names.
I'm sure they're no help.
Do you have a final guess bill? Oh boy. but it doesn't even matter if I mispronounce their names. I'm sure they're no help.
Do you have a final guess, Bill?
Oh, boy.
I'm going to just go.
I'm just trying to think of the thing.
I can't even think of another movie.
John Carpenter's the thing.
Okay, Andy.
I mean, I could just name her. Big Trouble in Little China.
Hey, Jeff.
The Fox
and the Hound.
This one
was stupid. It's just you got screwed up
by a technicality.
The title of the movie
that Andy was so close to
is The Christmas Chronicles Part 2.
Yeah, it was a dumb Part 2 thing.
All right, so Bill, we're back to you.
First up, top build in this Christmas motion picture, Peter Billingsley.
I'm going to go with uh theme of sequels i'm gonna go with a christmas story christmas that is motherfucking correct work wow that's another movie where the
last panel looked at me and insisted that i'm talking about a movie that doesn't exist
i interviewed him last month.
Oh my God.
The fact that I even knew it was called
A Christmas Story Christmas, I love it.
I love it.
See, now you can see the pattern here.
With all of these movies,
people were supposed to guess a wrong movie
as their first guess.
They're supposed to guess Grinch, Die Hard,
the original Christmas Chronicles,
the original Christmas Story.
And instead, they didn't have that base to work off of. the original Christmas Chronicles, the original Christmas story, and instead
they didn't have that base to work off
of. They didn't even know
to do, you know what I mean? They didn't even know
that much. So why would they be
guessing sequels when they don't even know?
You know what I mean?
It was wild. Here we go.
This is so exciting.
We've got a three-way tie. You've each got
a point.
This one starts with Andy.
Mila Kunis.
Mila Kunis is in a Christmas
movie. And don't forget to have
a Merry Kunis, everybody.
Oh, I oh i
i have um bad moms incorrect
yes a bad mom's Christmas. That is correct.
Yeah. That's a movie?
That's not a movie.
That's the sequel, yeah.
Figuring it out.
Yes, it is the follow-up.
It's called A Bad Mom's Christmas,
which is hilarious to me to just have such weird words in front of
and then just stick Christmas at the end.
Did you guys ever see the sequel to The Revenant,
Revenant Christmas?
Did you ever see Martin Scorsese's
Silence 2 colon Christmas?
I did.
All right.
Now this next one, one of my guests
got immediately, which really was
delightful and funny to me because it's a weird one.
And Bill, you get to go first.
Steve Martin.
I'm going to go with Mixed Nuts.
That's correct.
Wow.
Well done.
Love that movie.
Yeah. Oh, shit. I've been forgetting to finish off the the bad mom's christmas the other names were kristin bell and katherine han and jay hernandez
and then mixed nuts was a real movie starring steve martin and a cast of amazing funny people
including the other three they they put in here madeline khan robert klein
and anthony lapaglia and um yeah mixed nuts it was not didn't turn out so good that movie um
but like i said one of my guests that was one of the ones that was guessed immediately
andy and jeff did you would you have guessed that for steve martin or were you already like
what i had it i could picture a 90s movie but i had it like confused with three other sort of
middle of 90s things i didn't see so yeah and the poster the poster image that you might be
familiar with is steve martin's face close up with it but with one of those santa hats on
and uh and then everybody
else I think is like small at the bottom
like they really led with him on it
but it was a real ensemble movie
that just didn't
click
okay so this is a wild
turn of events
because Bill just guessed Mixed Nuts right
correct
okay so that put Bill in a tie with Jeff.
And I'm sad to say, Andy, that you are one point behind the two of them.
So the tiebreaker is just going to be between Bill and Jeff.
And Jeff gets to go first.
And this was the top gaslighting that occurred to me that evening because I find it
bizarre that no one was familiar with this movie.
I went out onto the street and started asking people.
All right.
Jeff, the top-billed person is Mr. Nicholas Cage.
Okay, so this is the family man.
That was what I was hoping people would guess.
You're right on that score, but not the movie I'm looking for.
Bill?
Okay, yeah, yeah.
Hold on.
I'm trying something.
Is it...
Oh, was that a Christmas movie?
I feel like there was Christmas-type stuff in there.
I'm going to go
Con Air.
Put the Christmas bunny down.
No. Incorrect.
We move back to Jeff.
All right.
Are you ready for the second name, Jeff? So Jeff. All right. Are you ready for the second name, Jeff?
So excited.
All right.
John Lovitz.
Oh, I know this movie.
It's called Trapped in Paradise.
That is correct.
Oh, damn.
Jeff Tate does it once again.
Jeff Tate is our winner today.
Congratulations, Jeff Tate is our winner today. Congratulations, Jeff.
That movie also starred Dana Carvey and Richard Bischel and three professional comedians who were alive when it was in theaters, insisted they'd never heard of it.
A movie starring two comedians and crazy ass Nick Cage.
cage um it was not a particularly good movie but i still think it pops up on some of the channels around christmas time because it takes place at christmas and uh the poster for it is they're
like in a snow globe yeah the three of them and they're like what are they it's kind of like
the wet bandits or something like there are three criminals that go to a town and then get stuck there yeah it's kind of got a like a um i remember i i saw this movie uh lost in yonkers type vibe
to it i believe i was gonna say quick change i was gonna say the dan akroyd one where he's
the terrifying like uh mayor of the weird town what is that one called what movie nothing but trouble nothing
but trouble nothing but trouble oh yeah oh god that's that movie oof that was a that's a rough
one because they like not only is it not funny but it's also kind of gross like there's a lot
of gross humor and like yeah and like dan eckroyd's like the goes crazy with the disgusting makeup
where like his looks like he has a dick on his face and stuff oh yeah it was yeah legitimately
like it kind of scared me when i saw it when i was a kid yeah it's not fun at all it's just
disturbing it is upsetting yeah like dan akroyd got too into it like it's too weird
so it's like a creepy version of deliverance.
You're saying.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What was the one with John Cusack where he found like a bunch of money,
money for nothing.
Oh yeah.
Cause all those seem to like,
there,
there were a rash of films where either people stole money or came across
money and they were stuck in a place where
they had to get rid of it or like had to hide it or whatever and like they came out like bang bang
bang like yeah the bill paxton 94 the sam raimi bill paxton one is like one of my favorite movies
yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah but that is a hard title too That's one of those ones that's hard to remember because it's just not flashy.
And it was too simple of a plan
as it turned out. It was planned by
simpletons. Should have been a little more
complicated.
They should have put more things into it.
Alright, Jeff, you big winner.
But I want to thank all three of you for
just making me feel better about uh my game creating skills and uh you know apologies i'm not trying to drag my guests
from the last episode i'm just trying to figure out this you know what's going on there and what
was going on there is that they just don't they're not like trivia mavens like you guys are yes right right we are we are i couldn't have gotten the trouble in paradise
or trapped in paradise yeah yeah trapped in paradise you didn't recognize it i mean i
recognize the the the actors and maybe the poster i could never have pulled the name i knew i knew
that was like bumbling thieves i just the name doesn't ring any bells yeah it's no it definitely was like a flop you know so i i i you know i can't really blame
anybody for not having heard of it when they were all three saying we don't know what we don't know
we've never heard anything about this it's just like it was already a kind of a noted movie because
it's weird that nicholas cage is teamed up with two two guys from snl you know or
whatever yeah yeah i gotta see it again because i watched part of it a couple years ago and i i
didn't mind it all right so jeff please uh promote yourself what do you got uh coming up uh minneapolis minnesota comedy corner underground uh february 2nd and 3rd
and uh january 21st i'll be in san francisco with uh doug for fast x interruption yeah that's
gonna be so much fun uh got a few other hilarious uh people doing that one with us,
including Arden Marine and Dan Van Kirk.
Yeah, it's going to be super fun.
And then, Jeff, we'll have you back on Zoom as soon as possible
to continue your winning streak.
Andy Wood, thank you so much for being here.
What would you like to promote?
My podcast, Probably Science.
You can find that wherever you listen to podcasts.
And I just want to like secret vision board
this into the world.
It's an hour drive to the nearest movie theater
for me up here in Joshua Tree.
There is an empty cineplex.
It's been sitting there for four years.
If somebody with deep pockets wants to open
a movie theater in the high desert i think it could work uh if you have the money
hit me up on social media at andy t wood um i could offer my sweat equity and that's about it
but i really miss going to movies i love that i love that about you but also that you know that
idea of like trying to just get them uh to reopen it that'd be
uh that'd be so cool are there are there enough people out there i don't i mean really sustain a
four-screen theater maybe not and that's the thing i think it's probably about like 80 000 people
between the four or five high desert cities here but you know there's like four million that come
to the national park every year and i guess you don't come up here to see a movie but if it became a thing that had you know
interesting programming and or festival i don't know i'm just putting it out there if somebody's
looking you know you get there's i see lots of celebrities like instagrams where they're like
hey i'm in joshua tree you know like it's a popular thing to go go to and and talk about so
like i think like seeing a movie there that could be fun if you do it right you could probably get
grants and stuff for for it to be you know a historic movie house and there's there might be a
road to actually getting that done yeah possible i just assume that to get off the ground this is
like a seven figure kind of thing i assume it's a ton of money and it's probably a bad bet in the
era of streaming but you never know someone might just love this area and have a passion for
bringing some good programming yeah they might need like a write-off they might need to they
might need an abject failure that they can dump a bunch of money into oh you hear that movie producers I know you guys
love fucking
shelving shit
yeah reopen this place and then shelve it
are they they're bringing back the
the Wile E. Coyote thing because
everyone's so mad
the outrage worked
I mean you know I don't know if it
always ends up being going the right way but that was a good one that i don't know why they they
should have quietly buried it if they were going to bury it you know but the fact that it just sort
of came out and everybody flipped over it because also some people had seen it. So there's a lot of people on online talking about how, and it's good.
Like it's a good movie. So yeah, I'm,
I'm happy that that they succumb to the pressure, but that's, you know,
it's the bottom line is they just go, Oh, that many people are upset.
Well, that many people will pay, you know, to see it or buy it, you know,
buy streaming to see it or whatever.
Okay, so Bill Squire, what do you got to promote, dude?
I had a special come out last year on YouTube.
I'd love it if people would check that out.
It's just called Bill Squire Pure BS.
And just subscribe to my YouTube channel.
That would be a cool thing to do.
Those are your initials.
Yeah.
That was me.
I was verbalizing the sound of Jeff getting it.
Thanks for being here.
You're welcome back anytime you have another special or anything to promote.
Or when I'm cruising through your neck of the woods,
I am excited to come back and do another show. Absolutely. special or anything to promote or when i'm uh cruising through your neck of the woods i i am
excited to come back and do another show at uh absolutely just some time just filmed a new special
uh last week so oh yeah sometime later this year or later in 2024 oh okay great yeah so come back
and i've got uh shows coming up this saturday douglas movies is in sacramento at the punchline at how about art
and mall uh sunday also sacramento i'm i'm uh hosting two stand-up comedy shows at the punchline
for new year's and then the benson movie interruption is back at dynasty typewriter on
january 2ndnd in LA with
it's going to be such a fun show. We got Scott Ackerman, Jonah Ray
and Zach Galifianakis interrupting
a movie that you bring in. You bring in a movie
and if you're the only one that brings in a movie, that's the one we'll watch.
January 6th, Orlando Improv, previously
mentioned. January 16th, I'm at
the Improv in LA.
Also,
previously mentioned, The Lab is our
fun new spot to do really intimate
audience episodes
of Doug Loves Movies.
DougLovesMovies.com is where
all my stuff lives.
Thanks again to Andy, Jeff,
and Bill.
We're on time or whatever,
but I just want to quickly ask you guys if any of you have a favorite last line from a movie,
because that's what I like to close with.
And I have something that I could do,
but I wanted to see if any of you had a good one.
I don't know. I know know it's a tough question and also like some of the obvious
ones come to mind you know like there's no place
like home or whatever Rosebud
but
it's fine if you
don't have any because what I did was
I thought
it's not easy for me to find out the
last line from Trapped in Paradise
so I'll just say what I think the last
line of Trapped in Paradise would be
so thanks again everybody for
listening and as
always hey
we got out of there now it's time for Doug to watch another
talkie
eyes of gold his viewing prowess makes him cocky
there's no room in his heart
for you
cause Doug loves movies