Doug Loves Movies - Bob Odenkirk and Chris Hardwick Guest

Episode Date: July 23, 2008

Doug invites Bob Odenkirk (Mr. Show) and Chris Hardwick (Attack of the Show) to debate the merits of Entertainment Weekly's 'New Classics' movie list.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

If you like Doug Benson, check out his new CD, Professional Humoridian, available on iTunes and at astrecords.com. Doug hates candy wrappers, squeaky babies, sticky seeds with 50 azepop or kernels in his teeth. There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug loves movies. The Love Movies PCB Theater in Los Angeles. Theme song by Hard and Firm. Cookie that I ate this afternoon by Laura. Yes. A young lady named Laura gave me a cookie. I'm like, that's 3 o'clock. The show's not for five hours.

I'm going to be fine by five hours from now. It's going to be great. And I'm sitting here and I'm like, I can by five hours from now it's going to be great and I'm sitting here and I'm like I can't even think of anything that's supposed to happen did you guys see Hancock? I skipped it I skipped it

he's had the number one movie like five times on, oh hey Bob Skipped it. He's had the number one movie like five times. Oh, hey, Bob. Mystery guest Bob Odenkirk is here. Yeah. Turned my story into a real cliffhanger. Will Doug remember what story he was telling?

And the answer is no. Let's bring our first guest out. You know him from when he stuck his head out just now. And talk to me. It's so many other things. Mr. Show. Ladies and gentlemen, Bob Odenkirk. Let's hear it for him.

Here he comes. Hey, buddy. Whoa. This is crazy. Crazy entrance. This is... It's great, isn't it? I've seen this table. Charlie Rose, no.

Nobel Peace Prize awards, this is what they use. And this set up with the microphones. Talk into this one, though. Hi, everyone. The podcast listeners didn't get any of that. This is actually a podcast. This is a podcast, everyone. The podcast listeners didn't get any of that. Is this actually a podcast? This is a podcast, yeah. It's not just for these folks

who are in the baggy shorts in the front row. I love it. This is awesome. Hey, you know, I got to ask you something. It's a hot summer night. Let's put on our baggy shorts and go watch guys talk about movies. You know the thing where

your pants hang down under your underwear? You know the thing? Sure. Like, a lot of times as people age, they'll bring their fashion from teenage years up with them. It'll come with them.

They'll continue to do it even though they've outgrown it in every way. In every way they should have stopped. But the thing where your pants go... You're going to do it for the audience. It's the gang pants.

Where you can see some of the underwear and some pants. They're kind of miraculous because they always stay up. How do they stay up? They always hold it? They're like magicians. I see them from behind.

It looks like they just have a wee. They have an interesting way of walking. They hold it, right? You've seen it, right? They have a very cliched limp going on, I thought was what was happening. Richard Belzer circa 1975. My impression of a black man.

That kind of walk. He started. He kind of walk. He started. He did start it. The black guy saw it and said, I guess I've got to walk like that now. Jesus. All right. I don't want to prove him a liar.

So that is not going to age well, is my point. That's a great point. You don't want to be doing that when you're 50. Anyhow, we'll see what happens it's the great mystery of the century how will that fashion fad age the funny thing too is that it will go away

and then kids, probably kids now are like 10 year olds are like the fuck, how corny Jesus, with the hole in his pants weird what do you like That's playing Like

In the movie theaters Right now What do you like I want to see Hellboy Cause that guy Is amazing I heard that Hellboy Is like if Hellboy

And Pan's Labyrinth Had a Had a Hellboy I want to see that. It's like fucking freaky as shit, supposedly. I think I want to see Batman. Oh, I could not be. That's the movie for me.

I think that's the best movie of the year, sight unseen. Yeah, I can't wait to see that. I'm completely in. I read in the L.A. Times, Christopher Nolan said that he was making an upsetting crime drama and not an action hero movie. And I'm like, yes, upsetting crime drama. And the dude is dead. The dude in the movie is dead.

It's going to be creepy as all hell. Count me in, Bob. You're going to take the kids? You're taking the kids? Mommy and me day, maybe? Monday morning? My kids have not seen, like, scary movies or even movies that are that

racy. They haven't. No, it's good. Keep them sheltered. They actually... They seem like sweet kids. I was at a barbecue with them the other day and they would not... They didn't come anywhere near me, so they know what's up. They've got good intuition they can read vibes they can read vibes dogs love me but the kids they know better uh so what uh a movie lately that you liked? Did you name one? Oh, that I liked? Yeah.

Can I tell you that when you told me what we were going to discuss this evening, I have a very different experience of movies from, I feel like, from most people. Okay. Well, this will be good. I do not care about the fact, like i'm watching casablanca right now as i work out i have a little thing and uh i watch a movie you know and i usually takes me like three workouts to watch it and uh and you know i've never thought it was it's never swept me up and i've watched it probably seven or eight times in my life.

And, you know, it's one of those things that people talk about like one of the best movies ever, and people just worship it. And I find it kind of cold. And I even find it kind of clunky. Like, you know, I don't know if you remember it very well, but Humphrey Bogart sees the girl, and he has had a past with her, and he's supposed to help shepherd her through wartime Casablanca. She's a fugitive, and the guy she's with is a fugitive.

And there's a Maltese falcon. From the Nazis. No. Jesus Christ. Oh, my God. When did they start making movies, Doug? Just pucker up and blow. Just pucker up and blow. What year? You gotta whistle, don't you? Just pucker up and blow.

What year did they start making movies? They started making movies in 78. That's right. 76 was a preview with Star Wars. And then a few years later the movies became awesome. I don't know if you remember this, but he says, you know, look, they clearly have this past, right?

There's all this weight to their scenes, and they really look at each other with great meaning, and they comment, they make comments, and you know they have this intense past, and they were in love. And they have this song, and don't play it, I can't hear it. And she's like, play it. And he's like, if you play it for her, you play it for me. And then, after all that, which is like, we get it. Uncanny, uncanny the voice. We get it, right?

Thank you. Thank you so much. And when I think of how long I worked on it, if it hadn't done well. Pays off. Pays off. Pays off. Hard work. The time you spend.

And then there's this fucking montage of them as younger people. Humphrey Bogart has like hair extensions in. And they're in Paris. And there's like little films playing behind them as they drive a car. It's insane. It's crappy. It's crappy.

Poorly made. You don't need the whole sequence. Hey, buddy. Chris Hardwick's here, everybody. I was actually invited to be on the show. It's terribly awkward for me to just say, just come out when you get there. I didn't want to interrupt the Casablanca.

This is the best news of all the years. Don't worry. I'll remember to get back on track. But briefly, Chris, put a pothead in charge. What were you doing?

Why did you have to come in a few minutes late? What was going on? I was doing an interview for a podcast for some friends of mine with one of the guys from the New Pornographers.

Are you always on a podcast? Yeah, that's right. I just hop from podcast to podcast. Sing like in a rocker voice, living on a podcast. Just do it for me. Living on a podcast! See, I knew you'd be able to do that.

I haven't figured out how to monetize it yet, so it's probably a bad career decision, but I figure... Make it right above that. Yeah, but I figure... Make it right at Buckingham. Yeah, but I just don't want to do anything else but be on TV. Leave it on the podcast! You're podcasting this, right?

Oh, fucking sweet. Well, I'm great. Two for two Tuesday. For Chris Hardwick. You started it. You started your year on the pod. That's right. So Bob is in a Casablanca's overrated thing. Go.

It's not just that it's overrated. It's that for me, it's not even that like it's in my top 100. It doesn't even rate. There's only in my – no, wait. It's a good movie. Top 2,054. I could give a shit. I'll watch it if I'm working out.

Yeah, just turn it on. You've got to work on it all the time. And I can't watch the same 15 movies over and over, which is what I do. The point is I have my movies that I like, and there's like 20 of them, and then that's it. Everything else, some of it's okay.

It just doesn't matter. It doesn't really matter to me. I don't care. It doesn't make it good because it's technically good. I don't give a shit. And just like the movies that I love, I don't care if they're technically not good. They're my favorite movies.

How often does a new one get in? How often can a new one get into the 20? I... Hancock? Probably not. I don't know, man. I would say it's not often. Alright, here we go. Alright, go ahead. EW, Entertainment Weekly,

Magazine, Chris Hardwick, Bob Odenkirk. Which, by the way, I'm in that one, so I have to honor their list. Okay. These are the list of the new classics. And by new classics, they mean since some specific year. The point is they want to... 75 or some shit. It's in here.

Best of the last 25 years. All right, good. All right, so here we go. Number 10, according to this magazine. 25 or some shit. It's in here. Best of the last 25 years. All right, good. All right, so here we go. Number 10, according to this magazine, Moulin Rouge. What? What?

Top 10 films by Johnny Faggot Pants. Yes, you can, can, can. Yes, you can, can, can. Yes, you can, can, can. Moulin Rouge. Yes, you can, can, can! Yes, you can, can, can! Yes, you can, can, can! Moulin Rouge! Yes, you can, can, can! Yes, you can, can, can! Oh, those

pommel nights. I love 19th century French techno. Chris is willing to go further than I was What would number 8 be? Let's just go down the list Let's go to number 9 You know I gotta say when I saw this table I thought we were going to have a serious discussion

You thought it was going to be all Charlie Rose style Okay Die Hard is number nine. And then it says here that in the TV version he says, Yippee-ki-yay, Melon Farmer. It really does say that. It says that he says that. Well, technically he is German. Let me just say...

That's another reason to watch that movie. It's a great movie. It's a really good movie. It's a great movie. That's a really good movie. It's a lot of fun to dub movies and make up crazy bullshit. And just... Because two of the films I've done have been dubbed for network, and that will be fun to see. I can't wait to see...

I hope I get to see Let's Go to Prison and the Brother Solomon played on some USA network or something because the nuttiest bullshit. We just put in crazy, meaningless insanity and it'll be funny, as funny as can be. Funniest thing, I suppose, about them.

Keep going. It just adds an extra layer of funny. No, I'm going to write that in. I'm just going to say now write... You have two people being funny. Nobody agrees with that. Or they're dying to know what's next on the list. Number eight.

I think it should rank much higher. I'll check with you guys after I say it. Silence of the Lambs. I think it should go up higher on the list than eighth. I don't know, man. Really? None of these movies... That's a spectacular movie.

Whenever it's on, I watch it from the moment I start watching it. It's very, very well done. It's mesmerizing. Yeah, but who gives a shit? It's about a fucking murderer and whatever. Murderers are depraved and soulless. You're a tough nut to crack, by the way. He gives a shit.

I mean, what are you contributing? And look, I've made three movies, and I don't think they rank either at all, and anywhere near rank. But the point is, what are you contributing to the... I tune in my top 1,500. The conversation. What are you contributing to the conversation, the public dialogue or whatever?

You know what I mean? What are you contributing to the world by making that movie? I mean, technically proficient, very entertaining, but I don't know. I don't think it's... I don't know. I don't know. Keep going.

I'd like to hear one that I think belongs in anything like a shotgun. It's so horrible. It makes me feel good about my life. Silence of the Lambs has brought us years of entertaining Hannibal Lecter satire. Put the lotion in the bucket. Put the lotion in the bucket. Oh, God, stop it. Oh, my God.

Put it in. Put it in. He gets me every time. Put it in! Put it in. He gets me every time. Put it in. Sometimes when I was mad at my kids and I needed them to do something when they were little babies, I would say,

it washes its hands! It finishes its vegetables! I don't know if they got the thing I was... I love it. Number seven, Hannah and Her Sisters. Well, you know... I think that's fairly appropriately placed. It's the sunniest of all of his movies.

How is Crimes and Misdemeanors not the movie? Well, that's a better... They sort of then go on to mention some of his other movies. I mean, Hannah and Her Sisters is about an old man having a crush, which is pathetic. Fucking pathetic. But he gets her in the end, though, doesn't he? What?

So it works out okay. No, he tells her he made a huge mistake, and he... There's one thing, one reason why it should belong there. Is this the one where it's in Russia? No. Max von Sydow's awesome, awesome... Is it in the future? One of the best lines ever in a Woody Allen movie. Is he in jail?

Can I just say that one of the best lines ever in a Woody Allen movie. If Jesus Christ came back today and saw what was happening in his name, he would never stop vomiting. Max von Sydow. Awesome.

I don't think he improvised that. But that was in Hannah and Her Sisters. Yes. So this was a good choice. Yeah. Saving Private Ryan's number six. Of course not. The first 20 minutes are amazing. Bookend stuff. I don't like... The first 20 minutes... I don't like anything

with that bookend stuff. I don't like that. You like the first 20? Oh, you've been once on the beach. The landing is an amazing experience and belongs in some

museum of war somewhere. But the fucking movie is corny as shit with all these fucking cornball characters in this story. Come on. Come on. Come on.

Jesus. I didn't make this list, Bob. Waste of time. Keep going. Don't yell at me. I only invited Chris so that you wouldn't yell at me. I'm not doing a very good job of stopping. Keep going.

You probably agreed with some of that. It's an overrated movie. Number five is Toy Story. It's really good. Toy Story. It's very, very well done. It's very well done. I like two better for some reason.

Yeah, two is a little more of an interesting story. If they were going to pick a movie that sort of ushered in the new, the Pixar CG era, I think Toy Story is a good choice. I don't think it beats Nemo, though. Nemo was good, yeah. There's something kind of, you know, one thing about Toy Story is the people characters were so fucking weird. Remember that?

It was, like, hard to look at. Yeah, that's what got better in the next movie. They were It was like hard to look at. Yeah, that's what got better in the next movie. They were a little less weird to look at. That first one, they were really creepy. Well, it all just works together.

Yeah, that's right. They were Polar Express creepy. Yeah. Oh, God. And I hope that movie's in the top three. I feel like Polar Express, like whenever I watch,

whenever I see Bruce Jenner now he reminds me of watching like Polar Express where you're like he's almost human okay this one

this next one number four I'd put it two or three and it's Blue Velvet It's a good one, right? Yeah, it's really, really good Several of his films I think Elephant Man is an amazing movie

Can I argue why A Blue Velvet belongs there? Because so much of what's Significant about the storytelling Is the images And the way they're married to the music. I mean, in other words, it's like, it's not, like, one thing about Saving Private Ryan is it would probably, you could write down what happens and it would have the same impact, except for that first 20 minutes, which is visceral, that it would have the same impact, except for that first 20 minutes, which is

visceral, that it would have watching it. It wouldn't have more impact watching people walk around saying those things as it would reading it. But Blue Velvet, you could never put that on paper and have it matter the way it does as a film. So it's a better film. It's a better use of film. Back to Saving Private Ryan,

though, have you seen the YouTube footage where they put Yakety Sax over a big chunk of the film? I want to see that.

Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. And like, bullets plugged in. That was fucking awesome. If you just search Yakety Sax and Saving Private Ryan, you'll see it.

That's awesome. Yeah, it's a good use. They've timed all the bullets to go da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. It's a good use They've timed all the bullets to go Oh, that's great Here's another one that would be good to do that to

Number three is Titanic Oh, come the fuck on Are you Boo indeed Number three is Titanic Why? Is there any There's a glare

So I can't see the magazine But is there any justification for why Titanic well you know there was that tragic ending where that old asshole threw that valuable

diamond into the water that was sad I actually scribbled that on the magazine that joke but um yeah I don't know

people love that movie I gotta say when it's on cable I think cable, I think it's immensely watchable. I really think that Leonardo DiCaprio's got something. Yeah, I agree. But I think... I really do. I think he carries it in the way that, like, if a decade or two earlier, Robert Redford would a movie.

Like, he's just so charming that you want to make love to him in a boat that's sinking so you can die with some dignity. Number two... It's corny, though. It's corny. Hold on a second. Titanic is corny. And that fucking old woman

raises the corn level. Threatening another guy for taking his lady. That was a perfectly good cruise until they hit the iceberg. Dude, what about the beginning of Titanic where his Italian friend is the worst? Hey, Jack, are we going to America?

And maybe we bring a pizza to America. Like, it's so fucking horrible. I can't believe any movie that has that kind of... How about Billy Zane? That's what I'm saying. Shouldn't his character be tying a woman to a railroad track? With a stovepipe hat? Yeah.

Waxing his mustache. Titanic should have been shown silent with an old peony next to it. But the old woman thing, the wraparound with the old woman is fucking horrible. And she's... I'm sure she's a fine actress, but the things she has to say just couldn't be worse corny.

Yeah, that was bullshit. The only way I could like that is if that was my grandma. Then I would say, she's great. I feel like I still get mad that she threw that thing in the ocean. That was worth millions!

You fucking cunt! I still get mad about it. Sometimes I'll wake up and be mad about it. Well, it shows that she's senile. It shows that the point of the movie is when people have... She should have given those divers to Leo to help these cats and dogs. The point is that when people have

Alzheimer's, it's very sad. And they have memories that are not true. They imagine they were on the same planet. What if she just went back in and said, I just threw my poop over the side. They went, no, that was the heart of the ocean. Oh, nuts. She has Alzheimer's? Should we let her hang on to the valuables?

You know, to make a movie about Alzheimer's is brave. And I think the interesting thing and the thing that makes people gasp is you watch this movie and you care about this story and you worry for this lady and the memories she has are so heavy. And then when she does this completely illogical, horrifying thing, how much good could she have done with that diamond? She obviously doesn't have any understanding of what the world is, where she is, what's going on, what's important or not important. And they've made their point. They've made their point that people with Alzheimer's

live in a completely other world. It's just tragic. And you shouldn't believe them when they tell memories. In the sequel, she rips up her stimulus check. Thinks it's just junk mail. Rips it right up. $600. $600.

I think it would be fine. $600 I think it'd be fine I like your idea that it's I think they should go back and re-edit it to mirror more of her like

crumbling mind and then just you'd see you see weird stuff in the background like and then the band started playing

as puppies flew to freedom you know like there's just weird shit in the background that she remembers okay I gotta get two more in

before we run out of time the Lord of the Rings trilogy is number two. Oh, fuck. The trilogy is number two? I made it through 15 minutes of that fucking thing. It was like a Kodak commercial with these goddamn little creatures jumping around in a fucking sun-dappled meadow

and this fucking Bilbo character putting on this goddamn ring, which he does as a prank. To open the movie, he does it as a prank. Then later, when Frodo puts it on, it's a fucking nightmare world! So why does Bilbo think it's a fucking hoot to put it on? Why is it just a big joke that he scampers around with the thing on to play a prank on his buddies on his birthday? And the fuck?

He goes to hell! Now wait, that doesn't make any fucking sense. Period. That's in the first 15 minutes. Secondly, Gandalf, shut up. Gandalf, I agree, I understand he's magic, but the notion that he can change and does change his height constantly when he walks around, it doesn't charm me.

It didn't charm me that they... They say... Where in Tolkien does it say... They say that he filmed an unfilmable novel and I say keyword unfilmable. What the fuck? Alright, number one Bob, here we go. Any last

thoughts on, we've got about 30 seconds I think. Any last thoughts on Pulp Fiction as their number one new classic? Well, I would never make it number one, but it's certainly in the top ten. It's awesome. My only complaint besides the actresses with the bad

foreign accents or the bad foreign actresses, there's two of them in there, I think. Besides that, it bothers me that the cleaner comes in and says, hey, wash that blood off of those guys. Get rid of the body. I'm the cleaner. I fixed everything

Like he comes in Everything Harvey Keitel tells him to do No shit, they're all fucking criminals I think they'd all proceed to do exactly those things That he suggests that they do He's not an innovator He doesn't cut any corners He doesn't make them a sandwich

He comes in and acts like he's really in control And he doesn't do shit And that movie made the N-word okay For white people to say Again That's our show, thank you very much everybody Bob Odenkirk, Chris Hardwick Out of the movies

Now it's time for Doug to watch another Talkie Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky There's no room in his heart for you Cause Doug loves movies