Doug Loves Movies - Brandon Collins, Noël Wells and Edgar Wright guest

Episode Date: October 29, 2021

Doug welcomes Brandon Collins, Noël Wells and Edgar Wright to the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on Stitcher Premium. For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to s...titcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming, maybe sticky seeds with 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth. There's still not one that he won't see. Because Doug loves movies. Hey, hey, hey, everybody. My name is Doug and I love Edgar Wright movies. This is Doug Loves Movies coming to you once again from the waning days of a real-life horror show with another Homes Alone edition. It's Wednesday, October 27, 2021.
Starting point is 00:00:35 And my guests today are three people I've actually seen in the flesh over the last few days, which is very exciting. They are Brandon Collins, Noelle Wells wells and edgar wright hey everybody hey hey let's meet everybody individually and alphabetically starting with returning champ from the show that we just did in uh our nation's capital last sund. It's Brandon Collins. Hey, Brandon. Hey, everybody. This is crazy. I've never won something so many times in a row before. My mom thinks I finally made it. You really are in the big time right now. It's like, Mom, don't feel so bad about me being the only child and you being a single mother.
Starting point is 00:01:24 You put me in front of a TV where I watch movies and now it's paying off. Exactly. All of us that were spending too much time watching TV, you know, are not all of us, but a lot of us managed to turn that into a career and a life. And it's and I love it. And, you know, you recommended and a life. And it's, uh, and I love it. And, um, you know, you recommended a midsummer, um, on the last episode when you were on and, uh, I passed that information along on my Twitter account and, uh, people are, people are into it. People are down with that choice. Um, it's the movie. It I mean, it's just a movie.
Starting point is 00:02:05 It's a good movie to put on during the Halloween season, especially if you want to see some brutal, violent scenes. And what a beautiful movie. What a beautiful movie that embraces drug use, you know? It's a good movie. I have a funny story about Midsommar. When I went to see it, there's a moment in the movie where something terrible happens at a cliff
Starting point is 00:02:27 edge and everybody that witnesses is appalled. And then there's a couple that says, right, we're leaving right now. And because the movie is like two and a half hours long, I remember that within the movie, you then see that couple 45 minutes later still trying to get their car. And somebody shouted out, haven't you left already? Also joining us, actor, director, writer, singer, and all around ray of sunshine. It's Noel Wells. Hello, Noel.
Starting point is 00:03:00 Hello, Doug. How are you? I'm good. I feel, I feel very, I like, yeah, that's how I feel, man. Well, this came together quite nicely because, you know, I kind of wanted to have a couple of guests who have, you know, actually seen Edgar's latest movie, and Brandon, being a fancy East coast critic, got to see it at the Toronto international film festival. And Noel and I saw it just the other night at the Academy of motion pictures in here in Los Angeles, their new museum has an amazing theater named after David Geffen,
Starting point is 00:03:44 I believe. And that was great seeing you there, Noel. It was really lovely to see you. And also, Edgar, that your film was the first premiere there. Like, I feel like are we ganging up on Edgar? Like, we're all like. We were hikes, Noel. We've all seen your movie. Now we're going to talk to you.
Starting point is 00:04:14 Right. But also at the same time, we don't want any spoilers because no one else has seen it yet. It opens Friday in theaters, both in the United States and the UK. And I'm just so excited. It's so great to see a movie early And then it also be something that you Are happy to Tell people to go see So let's just introduce him right now His latest joint Last Night in Soho
Starting point is 00:04:35 It's Edgar Wright Hello, hello, hello Hey Nice to be back Congratulations on Not only a great film, but a film that you managed to put out along with another great film also during this whole pandemic thing. When I think about the fact it's my second movie of the year, I get immediately exhausted. It makes me want to take a nap. I mean, immediately after this show,
Starting point is 00:05:09 I'm going to curl up into the fetal position and not be heard from again for another nine months. I mean, it's probably unprecedented that, you know, you usually have projects like kind of, you know, plates spinning, but you're usually not making, you know, two films simultaneously. You usually do them one at a time. It's the only time that I've ever successfully multitasked in my life. And of course we should mention that's the, uh, the Sparks brothers, uh,
Starting point is 00:05:35 movie or Sparks brothers. And, um, it's a great documentary. And, uh, there was a guy, I want to tell Edgar that there was a guy in the audience at the last show I did in Washington, D.C. who said, you know, I said, what was the last movie you saw? And he said, I don't go to movies much. I just saw some documentary. And I like pressed to find out what it was. And he had to ask other people at his table.
Starting point is 00:05:59 But the one movie this guy that doesn't go to movies saw in a theater was Sparks Brothers. So I was very. this guy that doesn't go to movies saw in a theater was a sparks brothers so uh i was i had a i had a surreal moment on the red carpet at the premiere the other night where anya taylor joy who was in the middle you know wearing this amazing dior gown in the middle of doing her red carpet photos saw out of the corner of her eye ron and russell malearks I went oh my god is that Sparks and stopped taking photos and ran over to them to say hi and I'd never seen her as starstruck by anybody else
Starting point is 00:06:32 so that was a particular point of pride for me and also just that strange thing of your worlds colliding yeah and also Thomas and Mackenzie who's also in the film was wearing the loudest dress I've ever heard. It was like a kind of Busby Berkeley, like,
Starting point is 00:06:50 sort of 1933 costume. It looked amazing. It was all like mirrored, like, discs. It was incredible. Yeah, but she can't sneak up on anybody in it. That's okay. She can't be doing any creeping um good dress for doing burglaries on houses without giving away the story i my first question to you edgar is just
Starting point is 00:07:15 you know how did the idea for this movie first come about it feels like it's been something you've been working on for a while yeah i guess I guess it's like two things. It's like one would just be, I guess, an obsession with the sixties that probably started with my parents' record collection. And then this nagging sort of feeling that I was becoming too obsessed and too nostalgic about a decade that I never lived in. And that thing where you start to question whether nostalgia is like an escape or
Starting point is 00:07:46 like a retreat from modern life. I think probably the latter. So that was part of it. And then the second part of it is just having lived in London for 27 years. And Soho, if you don't know it, is like, you know, a square mile right in the middle of town that is slightly like a law under to itself, which, which you know for hundreds of years like artists and writers and the criminal underworld have like mixed and it's not it's not the same as it was but it's obviously been massively gentrified but there's still kind of that sort of edgy quality to it it's still like a place that after midnight like the dark brigadoon version of soho starts to rise up and soho of course that's the abbreviation for south of hogwarts
Starting point is 00:08:33 i think it's much well i guess because they shot hogwarts in in scotland right so it technically it is south of home i think because in new york it's south of houston. I think it comes, because in New York it's south of Houston, right? What I gather is it was like a hunting call that the ground used to be, before there was a city there, was like where aristocrats would hunt. And so they would be like, it was a hunting call, Soho.
Starting point is 00:08:59 I know that sounds bonkers. That is the official explanation. And also London's Soho kind of existed before new york soho right right that's what they say over there you know yeah i think i think most things uh started in the uk first it's true it all just got shipped over here eventually um we had york We had York before New York. Uh-huh. That's right. Join me to Parliament. One more thing I want to ask about, because I know we're going to, you know, we're here to play some games, but I'm just so excited to talk to you about this movie.
Starting point is 00:09:47 And if Noel or Brandon have a question you'd like to ask Edgar about the movie, feel free after I spit this one out. I just want to say thank you on behalf of all the people who hate to see vomit in movies. Why? What what was your choice there without, you know, you know, it's not saying too much to say that someone vomits, but what, what was the choice there to not show it? Cause people always show it, but you are very discreet. You know, what's happening, but you don't have to see it. Well, number one, I knew you had an issue with it, Doug. And I knew you were going to see the movie and I didn't want to put you off or sort of say on Twitter, no, there is a vomiting thing,
Starting point is 00:10:24 but there is a bit, I, this is too much. I don't want to get into spoilers, but there, there is like he does cough up a dark liquid at one point, but it's not like sort of, there's not a sick scene. No, there's not like a pea soup exorcist scene. No. Yeah. And it's just, you know, they call them people that don't like that stuff are called metaphobes. And I started doing a thing where I would just warn people if there's
Starting point is 00:10:45 vomiting in a movie. And then it just became ridiculous. You just you should you tell people when there isn't vomiting in a movie because it just happens so frequently because it's just such a cinematic act. You know, you can fake it. It's easy to fake and it's disgusting and it's, you know, gets your attention. I want to quickly ask you a question as in a metaphor, which of these films is worse for you? And by me, the witches of Eastwick or the exorcist? I'm all right. For some crazy reason, the exorcist doesn't bother me at all. I don't know why. Maybe because, you know, it's just broken. Yeah, I don't know. I guess because of my not being religious, you know,
Starting point is 00:11:23 I mean, it's a scary, awesome movie. Don't get me wrong, but I'm just saying the pea soup coming out, I guess also just everybody referring to it as pea soup. But but but Witches of Eastwood and Stand By Me, I mean, you nailed it. Those are two of the most disgusting sequences that I can picture in my head exactly what, like, they're just, you know, they're just scorched into my brain. I'll never forget those. But I also like both of those movies. So I just, you know, just have to lump it and, you know, suck it up and get through it. Not suck up the vomit though. No, no. Stay away from that entirely. Noel, do you have a question about Last Night in Soho? Well, I, I have a comment which was,
Starting point is 00:12:07 I guess I'm, so I went into the movie completely blind, which I love to do. I don't like reading anything. I just like to have the experience. So I feel like I had a, I feel like I went on the journey, probably as you intended. And I texted you, Edgar, and I said that,
Starting point is 00:12:21 like a tagline I would say for it is like, nostalgia kills. And I thought that was a tagline I would say for it is like nostalgia kills. And I thought that was like, so cool how that, like, I wasn't expecting, you know, where the movie went. My question would be how, how do you describe it to people without, you know, giving anything away or like, what's your tagline? I think it's a similar, I always say a cautionary tale for time travelers. It's like, even if you if you you know if you i mean
Starting point is 00:12:46 i'd always that would that would be a similar thing would be like something about the dangers of romanticizing the past because i think you know it speaks to that you know a lot of recently people have been using the phrase the good old days a lot and you know to say the good old days is to imagine a decade where everything was great and nothing was bad which is of course bullshit so it was it was really sort of inspired by that idea is that you know the 60s at its most reductive people like think about oh Austin Powers and you know like people in mini dresses dancing in the middle of Carnaby Street but of course the darker side was was there and huge and then and not to be ignored yeah I, I dressed as an homage to Gene Seberg in Breathless for your movie premiere. I really appreciated that.
Starting point is 00:13:34 And I made a purse out of newspaper and I was surprised at how in the movie there was like some kind of tie into that. But anyway, that's the opening scene of the film. That's not a spoiler. But yeah, she's like opening scene of the film. That's not a spoiler. But yeah, she's like wearing a newspaper dress. And I was like, what the fuck? Like I just made my friend came with me.
Starting point is 00:13:52 It was like, that is so weird. And, but I'll say, because I didn't want to just dress up. Our friend, Gabby, our friend,
Starting point is 00:13:59 our friend, our mutual friend, Gabby, you're right. Sorry. But I will say, I listened to a podcast that was like really breaking down Jean Sieber. Like I've read her wiki and stuff,
Starting point is 00:14:08 but I like really went into a deep dive. And I was like, man, this time. The Karina Longworth podcast. Yes. She was there. She was at the premiere. Oh, amazing. Well, I was listening to her podcast
Starting point is 00:14:19 running up to your premiere. And yeah, like the 60s, it's, you know, she's a Pinterest icon, Jean Sieberg. And we love how, you know, beautiful and favorite. She was just like abused by her directors and was like passed around from husbands. And it's glamorous, but it's like really, really messed up. And I thought your movie was like a perfect encapsulation of that.
Starting point is 00:14:38 Oh, thank you. You're welcome. Yeah. But also it's a fun night at the movies on Friday. It's a fun movie. It's beautiful. It's a great, I mean, yeah. Yeah. So if you like your glamor, if you like your glamor messed up, that's, this is the way to go. Cause it's, it's, it's all in one.
Starting point is 00:14:56 Do you like the tagline they put on the poster, Edgar? Which one? I think there's two in different countries. Okay. Cause I, this is the one I saw a murder in the past, a mystery in the future. Yeah. I like it. Yeah. You should just change it to nostalgia kills. Like Doug Benson says, no vomit on screen. You're getting some really good pull quotes from this podcast.
Starting point is 00:15:24 you're getting some really good pull quotes from this podcast yeah the other thing i said was i i it was surprisingly terrifying i think surprisingly terrifying is a good pull quote yes yeah because uh noelle's not normally into scary movies so you tricked her on this one i got tricked for sure i'm just yeah it's a hundred yeah i was a hundred percent tricked you will be tricked by this film if on the tv spot that the voiceover guy goes rated r like that you know you know that it's gonna be intense right yeah how he says it right that's a real giveaway if they just go rate it r it's like oh somebody just drops an f-bomb and they just didn't do it's too precious to cut um or i should say a second f-bomb because you can do one now right and get that pg-13 has to be non-sexual though yeah you just have to be like if your it. If your car is broken down
Starting point is 00:16:25 and you say, ah, fuck this car, you could get a PG-13. But if you say, I want to fuck that car, that's an R rating. If you've seen the movie Titan, but that's exactly what happens. And what about,
Starting point is 00:16:43 did you, was it tough for you to get the amount of violence that this is that's in this movie past the, you know, the censors for the R rating or was it? No, I don't think it's actually weirdly in the UK. It's my first 18 certificate, which I think sort of, you know, was was causing sort of some consternation to the distributors. But as a kid who grew up with the idea that like horror movies should be 18s, I mean, sometimes in the UK you have the 18 and the 15. And sometimes you get these films that are saying the most intense movie of the year, 15. Well, the most grueling horror movie you've seen, 15. I always think that's kind of funny in its own right. So I wasn't too worried about getting an 18 in the UK,
Starting point is 00:17:28 but I don't think it's that it's it builds up to something. It's not like it's violent all the way through. It's pretty amusing, though, when, you know, when a horror movie here has a PG-13, because I'm already like, oh, well, that's how's that going to be scary? You know, because it's the the threat of violence is still the number one scary thing to me as a moviegoer, you know, when I'm seeing a scary movie. So if I know it's PG-13, you know, how intense is it going to get? You know, Ghost is going to push a book off a shelf.
Starting point is 00:18:00 But in a similar vein, like the voiceover guy has to work extra hard on those TV spots because then he just goes Radio PG-13. Is that making it sound more intense than it is? Well, good luck with it. I'm sure it's going to be huge. It's, you know, been delayed so many times that you just sort of landed
Starting point is 00:18:21 on Halloween weekend. That was never the intent. No, it was. It was? Originally scheduled for April, but in the UK, UK cinemas weren't even open in April. So we were actually the people that pushed it to October because it felt like, you know, it didn't feel like a summer movie. It felt, you know, if it had come out in April,
Starting point is 00:18:41 the UK cinemas weren't open. So we had the opportunity to push it and we all thought, let's go to, let's go to October because it's the kind of movie that it feels like the right movie when the nights are getting longer. That's how I feel about it. So I was behind the push. Nice. Yeah. I mean, most movies. Edgar Wright gets what he wanted again. Well, yeah, I mean, it is a much better time than
Starting point is 00:19:07 April but I was also you know that delay didn't make me very happy it made the movie it built it up more for you know there's more excitement about it because it was supposed to come out so long ago and it's been finished for so long and I'm glad
Starting point is 00:19:24 we're finally here and that you're here to compete with brandon and with noel and we're gonna play those games that i talked about right after this break we'll be right back we are back and uh i've prepared a couple games for everybody to play. Brandon is on a tear. He seems unstoppable, but we'll see if Team WW, if Noel Wells and Edgar Wright. NW and EW together. Yeah. Ooh and noot.
Starting point is 00:20:01 And this first game I play, it was awesome that we were just talking about taglines because it's called whose tagline is it anyway? I'll say a tagline for a motion picture. As we know, there could be, there's several different ones that are generated for different posters and ads and things. So some of them may be more, you know, obscure or weird than others. Um, Brandon gets to go first. I'll, I'll say the, uh, tagline,
Starting point is 00:20:34 you guess what movie it's in. If you're wrong, Noel gets a shot at it. If she's wrong, then Edgar gets a shot. And, uh, we proceed accordingly until someone has, well, we'll see who, whoever guesses the most right, but these are tough. So there will be a theme as well that will emerge, but of course you won't know what that is on the first one. You ready, Brandon? Getting very gravelly, Doug. It's quite sexy.
Starting point is 00:21:03 I think that's during the, during the description parts that I have to do over and over again. I get it. My voice gets more serious. Brandon, your first tagline is simply it's delicious with an exclamation point. It's delicious. Sweet and sour. That's a movie I saw in the 90s. That is not
Starting point is 00:21:42 the correct answer. We go to Noelle. Hmm. Hmm. I feel like maybe a zombie movie. Let me. It's delicious. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:22:05 Do I have to guess? You don't have to, but it'd be fun if you guessed and you were right. I just said Ratatouille, which feels really good. Sorry. That's a good guess. I still
Starting point is 00:22:19 am not clear what that dish Ratatouille is, but I do know that. Because also his name isn't confusing because his name isn't Ratatouille. He's just, since he's a rat chef, they call it that. His name's Remy. Anyway.
Starting point is 00:22:37 As a kid, have you never had Ratatouille, Doug? I may have had it or saw it, but I just right now couldn't tell you what it is what is it it's like um oh my god i mean it's i saw peppers and vegetables and kind of like a sauce and stuff i really my mom used to make it and i really really did not like it and i still have that straight horrible sense memory of like when I think of Ratatouille is like so no
Starting point is 00:23:05 not a Ratatouille fan but I love the movie that was the only edition of the movie where I was like that doesn't look great as an eight year old it didn't taste great but I like them it doesn't you know didn't put me off the movie that's good what do you think this
Starting point is 00:23:21 I'm not sure, but I'm going to say, is it Larry Cohen's The Stuff? That is a terrific guess, but that is also incorrect. But maybe these next ones will be a little easier because you'll maybe get an
Starting point is 00:23:40 idea what the theme might be. But It's Delicious was a tagline for breakfast at Tiffany's. Oh, okay. Brandon, here's the next one. Oh, Jesus. Love is what it's all about. And another exclamation point.
Starting point is 00:23:59 These are some excited taglines. Love is what it's all about. Love don't cost a thing no all right well i mean you know could could be that uh noelle what do you think it is Noelle, what do you think it is? I feel like I know what the theme is. So, I mean, I'm just going to guess. I'm going to say, is it My Fair Lady? No. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:24:36 Edgar? I'm going to continue on this same theme. Is it Roman Holiday? Oh, that's also a terrific guess. Roman Holiday. Oh, that's also a terrific guess. But the answer is Sweet Charity. Oh, now I should have known this because I know what you're doing now.
Starting point is 00:24:58 God damn it. All right, Brandon, you're up again. I just want to point out at this moment that in the opening scene of my movie, there are posters for Breakfast at Tiffany's and Sweet Charity on Thomas and Mackenzie's wall in the opening scene. So I should have known that one was coming. Sweet Charities was Shirley MacLaine, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:18 Yeah. Bob Costner's debut. Amazing movie. Yeah. And both of those movies are just that the fashion is just like i mean that's it's very they're very good picks for a girl that wants to be a fashion designer in her you know in her room um but now that's the end of those posters from her room so where is it going to go from here, Brandon?
Starting point is 00:25:46 Oh, geez. You ready? No. What movie has the tagline, look out, here comes the biggest bond of all. Here comes the biggest bond of all. Mm-hmm. I gotta pass. I'm blanking.
Starting point is 00:26:12 Noelle? Well, I... It's... I know what's happening. I wish I knew... I'm trying to look at the movie in my head. Hold on. Because I think I know what's happening.
Starting point is 00:26:29 I mean, I can cue up Edgar, maybe. I feel like the biggest Bond of all would be a Sean Connery Bond movie. Perhaps. But I don't. Maybe Goldfinger? I don't know. I know what it is. That is incorrect. Edgar, what is know. I know what it is. That is incorrect.
Starting point is 00:26:47 Edgar, what is it? I know what it is. Yes, you do. It is Thunderball. No, you were right. It is a Sean Connery Bond movie. Yeah. One off. You went for the one before. It's the one after. I have a question then. Is it movies that were in his movie? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:03 The poster for Thunderball is also in Last Night in Soho, yes. Okay, okay. Cool, cool. Alright, I got it. There is a Thunderball Yeah. I was thinking Thunderball or Your Majesty's Service but then I'm like, that doesn't make any sense so I psyched myself up. Well, Honor, Majesty,
Starting point is 00:27:20 Secret Service would have been, you know, interesting nod but I think that the year wouldn't time out right. But it would have been, you know, interesting nod, but I think that the year wouldn't time out right. But it would have been fun to see. I was almost going to say Honor, Majesty, Secret Service, but then I remembered it's Thunderbolt, but I think the Honor, Majesty, Secret Service tagline is something like
Starting point is 00:27:35 look up, look down, look out. They're just it's just all the taglines just trying to make you not realize Sean Connery's not in it. Look over there. Look over there.
Starting point is 00:27:49 Connery and Bond. Look over there. Diana Rigg, of course. Yeah. But, you know, Diana Rigg, of course, is in your film and, of course, was married James Bond in Honor Majesty Secret Service.
Starting point is 00:28:04 Briefly married to Bond. Yeah. So brief, so brief. And also probably one of the most, I feel like her death in that movie is one of the most violent, you know, like you usually don't see a bullet hole in somebody's head like that, you know, it was intense. Like the end of that movie is really touching.
Starting point is 00:28:23 Also like George Lazenby, you know, who in the movie is sometimes kind of post-dubbed and stuff like it's, it's, you know, it's interesting performance. Cause obviously you have big shoes to step into with Sean Connery, but his performance in the last scene is really good. I always like really struck by that. It's one of the great endings of any of those movies. It's a, I think it's a very solid entry in the series, but of course,
Starting point is 00:28:45 Thunderball, that shot that you have in the movie of the Thunderball, you know, that huge display that's on the outside of the theater is just, you know, it's an amazing shot and, you know, and a great tribute to the Sean Connery Bond movies in general. I think when we were shooting that scene, members of the public thought that Thunderball was playing there when we were trying to get our kids. All right. Well, Edgar won that game. Congratulations.
Starting point is 00:29:19 He's back in it to win it. And we're going to play one more game to determine our winner today and we'll do that right after this break we'll be right back we are back with our friend brando collins i call i call him you know it's brandon but i call him brando because that's that's fun movie word and then um noel wells and edgar right edgar the last game, so he gets to go first in our next and final game today. Filmily feud. It's just like family feud, but the questions are mostly about movies. Yeah, all of these are about movies.
Starting point is 00:30:04 I don't know why I said mostly um in the uk this game show is called family fortunes oh is it yeah it has a different title but do they have the same what's the noise that it makes when you get a wrong answer on family feud oh okay so family fortunes it goes always have to be extra over there yeah it sounds like a sounds like a buzzer that's like shorting out or something oh we added we added an extra syllable to the title and we added an extra part to the the no noise as well yeah yeah it's just a big red x comes up and uh yeah and the buzzer sound. But this is basically a very similar game.
Starting point is 00:30:47 I polled people on Twitter various silly questions and each of you will get to take turns guessing which one of the answers you think got the best response and whatever percentage out of 100 that answer got will be added to your
Starting point is 00:31:03 score. The person with the most points after three rounds wins, and everyone's going to get a chance to go first once. We'll rotate who goes first. But since Edgar won that game, he gets to go first on this very first question. The question is, and I'll give you all the answers that you get to
Starting point is 00:31:19 choose from. So there's either like four or three answers, and you just get to pick one, and Edgar gets to go first first if you're going to get killed by you know a jason or a mike myers type you know a movie slasher which method would you prefer and i asked, would they prefer knifing, chainsawing, javelining or being tickled to death? Out of those four, Edgar, which one do you think people voted for the most? Hmm. I mean. Maybe this maybe this is exactly the opposite of what it would be, but let's say tickle to death. It's just such a crazy concept to me because, well, sure,
Starting point is 00:32:12 it sounds like it's still got to be painful enough to kill you, right? So it's not like really being tickled. I don't know. I don't get it. But anyway, okay, so Edgar's going with tickle to death. Brandon, which one would you like of the remaining three knifing chainsawing or javelin i'm gonna go with knifing okay any reason behind that i mean no one wants to get killed with a chainsaw uh full disclosure i don't know what javelin means.
Starting point is 00:32:48 Well, like, you know, a javelin went through you, like in that spike in the first Home and Movie. Yeah, so knife. Yeah, absolute knife. Okay. The javelin would be over fastest, I think, out of the four of them. Yeah, that's another way to look at it. If you get a knife straight to the heart,
Starting point is 00:33:03 you're good to go. Or that head the head you know just before that happens so chainsaws are just chainsaws are just so upsetting to me because it's you know first not only are you getting killed you have to put up with all that racket noisy it's so noisy that's why i would say if i'm gonna i would definitely just go out by a chainsaw so i'm i would pick chainsawing just get it over with quicker also it's like you know if you know you're gonna die you might as well just like really go out with a gruesome bang and i think it would be the fastest and it would the noise would be so loud you could drown out your own screams so all right well i mean response i can't like i want to be pragmatic about it
Starting point is 00:33:49 i can't speak to uh you know the the poll respondents i can't speak to their um reasoning uh but they like javelining the best. Oh, yeah. Yeah. 40% of the people polled picked javelining. Coming in second after javelining was tickled to death. And that was 30%. So Edgar gets 30 points for that. And then.
Starting point is 00:34:21 Clear. Did you poll the Olympic village? Is that who you asked? No, I just asked, you you know people that are on twitter so uh you know i have no idea of the uh you know i assume it's mostly teenage boys if i had to be honest and then um uh chainsawing got 15% of the votes. So Noel gets 15 points there and then poor old knifing, I guess, you know, people just don't want to be knifed. I guess it's, you know, obviously it'd take too many, you know, it has to keep, you know, you have to keep getting stabbed to really for it to be effective.
Starting point is 00:34:57 And that wouldn't be any fun. So they said, uh, 14% of the people answered that one. So we still have a pretty tight game considering how high up the points can go on these. The second round starts right now with Brandon getting to go first. Oh, Lord. You're having an intimate monster party, you know, like in the film Mad Monster Party,
Starting point is 00:35:21 but only have room for three guests. Who doesn't get an invite? Do you blow off Dracula, the Wolfman, the Invisible Man, or the Mummy? I would blow off the Invisible Man because you're not going to know if he's there. It's just wasting a seat. because you're not going to know if he's there. It's just wasting a seat. I mean, I think if anybody took that seat,
Starting point is 00:35:50 they'd know he was there because you could still feel the invisible man, I think. But also, I'm thinking of the invisible man who walks around with sunglasses and a fez on. He's polite that way. You know, oh, I can see a man is coming towards me because he's got all that stuff on his head. head well for me that's like even creepier i'd rather have like a full dracula and wolfman than like a dude who's invisible and just has sunglasses and a creepy wig possibly i just feel like the invisible man was probably the easiest to animate
Starting point is 00:36:18 but when uh you know rankin bass made mad mad monster party um all right who's up next uh noelle yeah i would just i would definitely blow off the wolf man if you're like he's probably gropey you know don't want a party well right but if the party's over by you know if it's like an early party maybe he'd just be a normal guy he won't won't turn into a wolf until the full moon comes out. Yeah, but then that means he's not even going to stay for the fun. He's taking up somebody else's, you know, like I feel like. Yeah. Wolfman is not a good late night hang, I guess.
Starting point is 00:36:55 Yeah. Yeah. He's not exactly. What do you think, Edgar, between Dracula and the mummy, who would you like be like? Well, Brandon and Noel have taken my two sort of next picks I would have had I probably would have gone for Invisible Man first and Wolfman second because the Wolfman's a wild card Dracula like maybe you would not trust Dracula with your
Starting point is 00:37:17 girlfriend if you left the room you'd go out and come back and she'd be sucked of blood and be one of his brides that's not not good. But I guess like Frankenstein again, is just sort of like unpredictable. Like he doesn't know his own strength. He's got terrible manners. He doesn't really understand what's happening and the chances of him kind of choking out another guest are high. So let's get rid of Frankenstein's monster. Now let's be clear. It's Frankenstein's monster, not Dr.
Starting point is 00:37:47 Frankenstein, right? It wasn't a, neither of them were available. They both have other plans that Am I got it wrong? What was the fourth choices? The fourth choice is the mummy. Oh, sorry. Dracula or the mummy.
Starting point is 00:38:01 I just hit my head. Okay. So yeah, I'd say the mummy. I think Dracula has to stay because he's the most glamorous of the four. So he's, he's a good get. Do you know what I mean? Like having a count, he's, you know, he's royalty. Like it's still, that's good.
Starting point is 00:38:16 So he's a good guest to have at parties. Let's give her the mummy. You're right about that. Like every Dracula is played by, you know, pretty charismatic actors. Yeah. It really is if you were having a party and Count Dracula showed up it would be it would be quite exciting I will say
Starting point is 00:38:34 Gary Oldman's Dracula though I'm not sure if I want him at my dinner party like I'd be like dude I'm not sucking from your chest like don't do it for Lee though oh my god george hamilton great to have yeah langella is a great one um yeah there's some good there's some good dracula's out there all right uh everybody really did a great job avoiding dracula on this one because only three
Starting point is 00:39:00 percent of the respondents thought that dr Dracula should be uninvited. I'd like to know what they were. Is he sexy? Yeah. And then also not getting a lot of bites here. The Wolfman comes in only at 9%. Yeah. It's a shame for Wolfie.
Starting point is 00:39:25 So you got a little bit of a bump there, Edgar, by picking the mummy, because that one is at 21%. But coming in at number one, nobody wants an invisible man at their party. 67%. Yeah. I think I blame Kevin Bacon's Hollow Man for why no one would want him there. Oh, man, that's true.
Starting point is 00:39:50 You know, very terrible things in that movie. Yeah, and also the most recent Invisible Man, it's just like something about getting to be invisible makes you do bad things. Oh, but that movie was incredible, though. It was awesome.
Starting point is 00:40:05 But if he was a fun Invisible Man, it's like, can the Invisible Man juggle? bad things. Oh, but that movie was incredible though. That little bit about that. It was awesome. But if he was a fun invisible man, it's like, can the invisible man juggle? Cause that's a good party trick to have a dinner party, right? Yeah. That'd be so fun to watch, you know, juggling by visible person. Well, you know, some jerk would just walk over and slap the balls down, you know, cause he just wouldn't be able to stand it. We've got one more round.
Starting point is 00:40:29 It's still anybody's game looking at these numbers. And Noel gets to go first on this one. Who would you rather be stuck in an elevator with for three hours? So this is longer than the motion picture that they were in. It's three hours in an elevator with Tango or Cash. Or,
Starting point is 00:40:55 third choice, I just prefer to be alone. In an elevator? So you got Tango played by, I hope I got this right, is Stallone Tango? This seems like an important part of the game. Which one's which?
Starting point is 00:41:11 I think he's Stallone's Tango and Kurt Russell's Cash. Kurt Russell's Cash. I remember, let me, no, correct me if I'm wrong. I'm going to remember their full names. Is it Ray Tango and Gabrielle Cash? Is that their names? I hope so. It's definitely Gabrielle Cash? Is that their names? I hope so. It's definitely Gabrielle Cash.
Starting point is 00:41:28 I remember that bit. Because they both sound like nicknames that someone would get. But they're their actual last names. Better than Hobson Shaw though, right? Tango and Cash at least has some panache to it. But I remember that thing and wait, the film's
Starting point is 00:41:45 called Hobbs and Shaw? Really boring surnames, guys. Yeah, Tango and Cash is a lyric in a great Tenacious D song and you're never going to hear Hobbs and Shaw in a song. Okay, so Noelle, Tango, Cash, or you'd prefer to be alone?
Starting point is 00:42:03 I would, honestly, because we're not assuming that either one of them are going to get us out of the elevator, correct? Oh, that's an excellent point. I mean, I don't know. They're both shorter in person than you'd think. I just, you know, the machismo of being stuck in an elevator with a man, you know, like for three hours. I just I would definitely just choose to be alone.
Starting point is 00:42:29 OK, I hear you. I'm open to that idea. Yeah. OK. Yeah. Also, I've never seen the movie, so I can't really. And educate. Let's let's go to Edgar then from the the remaining two the two fellas tango or cash
Starting point is 00:42:48 who do you think uh the people would rather be trapped with as i recall cash is played by kurt russell correct yeah yes okay so i would rather spend three hours in a lift with kurt russell than sylvester salone so i think i have met kurt russell once and he is an utterly charming person full of stories and very funny and sweet it's like cash all the way kurt russell please for three hours it would be a pleasure to share a lift with kurt russell for three hours i mean it kind of would be like he would be annoyed at how like happy he'd be about it um happy he'd be about it um ask him about big troubling little china for three hours oh my god you just i just spent the entire time going you know jack burton would get us out of here um how come you were never in stargate a sequel or anything like that what happened there
Starting point is 00:43:40 um so yeah you're stuck with Tango there, Brandon. I'm actually fine with that because if memory serves, doesn't Tango kind of like always save the day? Like he always gets them out of the situation, I think. Oh, he's better at all that shit than the other guy? I think he's a little bit more like,
Starting point is 00:43:59 from what I recall, I feel like he saves cash a few times. Wow. Why wasn't the choice Sylvester Stallone, Kurt Russell, or Terry Hatcher? Because who would everybody wants to be trapped with a desperate housewife?
Starting point is 00:44:24 Alright, so I'm sitting here working out the scores because with a desperate housewife. All right. So I'm sitting here working out the scores because it was a bad idea for me to play a game where there's math involved, but I should be able to figure this out. Three, four, five, six, seven, eight, two. Okay. Anyway, turns out people would rather not spend time with Tango or Cash. 73% said they prefer to be alone.
Starting point is 00:44:58 Jeez. Yeah. And then, let's see here. Cash, though, is the preference between the two of them at 21 percent. And Tango has stuck with the remaining six percent. So that gives by my count, that gives Brandon 87 points. And Edgar has 72 points. And Noel has 97.
Starting point is 00:45:39 Noel, you are our winner today. Congratulations. you are our winner today nice congratulations you've ended Brandon's epic run he won five times in a row and it's finally
Starting point is 00:45:54 over Noel Wells you get to do your plugs first what would you like to plug? oh wow the second season of the animated show Star Trek Lower Decks is on Paramount+. The season finale came out, I think, two weeks ago, but you can still catch up. So that's what I'm plugging.
Starting point is 00:46:15 I play Tendi on it. That's awesome. Yeah, yeah. It's great. The second season is amazing. It's so fun. I hear it's super fun and funny and like you don't need to be uh you know a trekker to uh you know get into it yeah and i've i've had to catch up on
Starting point is 00:46:31 star trek because i i didn't when i auditioned for it i didn't even know what i was auditioning for and i had not been involved in the star trek universe so i've i've had to be brought into it but yes i would say that you can watch it not having been a part of the universe and probably also get inducted into it like as a fan if because the show is so funny and so accessible very good uh we will i will my team which is mostly just me will reach out about having you back on uh very soon as a returning champion i haven't won anything for such a long time i see brandon well brandon's just been winning it uh non-stop and this is your your last uh last chance to plug brandon what would you like to plug today oh man uh folks y'all can follow me at american collins and all social media platforms
Starting point is 00:47:24 and then check out my movie review podcast medium popcorn where we spoil movies new and old and we say insane things the most recent episode of urban legend we actually do a freestyle as the rock and idris elba it's one of the funniest things you'll ever hear so check that out it sounds pretty good and then uh edgar wright last night in soho in theaters you i was gonna am i not allowed to plug it myself no you you're you like fill in all the rest of the details you want to say i just like to i like when i know the actual facts i like to say them uh i'd like to plug last night in soho rated R on Friday.
Starting point is 00:48:06 And Doug loves movie winner. Noel Wells says it's surprisingly terrifying. And you, and Doug Benson says you don't have to see the vomit. No vomit on screen. Brandon, what's your pork? We need a pork white from you.
Starting point is 00:48:28 I'm going to say good music, good vibes, darkness all around. That's a good tagline. Good music, good vibes, bad times. Just like, what? I got to say.
Starting point is 00:48:48 Good times, good vibes good vibes oh goodness it turns it turns but that's that's the fun is i i do like uh you know that it's so stylish and so fun to watch and then but then also has some uh some scary scary stuff in there and um those people that responded to knifing so poorly uh might end up sitting this one out but like edgar said it's it's quick and easy i mean noelle wells doesn't even like horror movies and she got through it i got more than got through it i i thoroughly enjoyed it. Yeah. Yeah. So that's really, that's really saying something. What gets killed by a javelin in it. Let's stress this much. Yeah. I, yeah. I just had that in my head cause I was, I was watching the omen on, uh,
Starting point is 00:49:38 the original omen the other night I was watching on TV as I was trying to fall asleep and I ended up staying awake for all of it because, you know, it's just every scene that as it starts, you go, Oh, this is a great set piece. It's just like a series of set pieces. I like it. You know, a different person dies or gets injured in each scene. And it's pretty entertaining. Be sure to follow Douglas movies on Twitter and check out my tour dates, Douglas movies.com.
Starting point is 00:50:04 And I always end every episode now with a kind of a, try to do it in a positive way by ending with the last line from a movie. Cause there's so many memorable last lines, but also so many that are just, you know, just they don't serve the function of necessarily being a wow moment. The movie just ends. But do you have a favorite last line from any of your previous films Edgar before Soho oh that's a good question um I have a favorite last line from another movie oh that's even better I mean not better but you know I'll take it I
Starting point is 00:50:41 really like the last line of this is Spinal. When Christopher Guest is talking about wanting to work in a chapeau shop, Rob Reiner says, would you really like to do that? And Christopher Guest says, I don't know. What are the hours? And then the film just ends. That's one of the greatest end lines ever. I don't know. What are the hours?
Starting point is 00:51:02 Yeah. And, you know, you do the voice perfectly. But I'm going to do it in my own accent here at the end. And thank you for being here. Edgar Wright, Noel Wells, and Brandon Collins, as always. I don't know. What are the hours? Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky There's no room in his heart for you
Starting point is 00:51:30 Cause Doug loves movies

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