Doug Loves Movies - Chad Daniels, John Evans and Geoff Tate guest
Episode Date: November 11, 2019Live from Wiseguys Comedy Club in Salt Lake City, Doug welcomes Chad Daniels, John Evans and Geoff Tate to the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on Stitcher Premium. F...or a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hey guys, producer Matt here. Apologies for the poor quality of the audio on this episode.
Out of our control, but hope you can take it.
And just so you know, Jeff Tate's microphone is out for the first seven minutes,
but that issue is resolved after the seven minute mark.
So, sit tight and enjoy.
Doug hates candy wrappers screaming baby sticky seeds
With 50 azobot portals in his teeth
There's still not one that he won't see
Cause Doug loves movies
Hey, hey, hey everybody
My name is Doug, and I love movies.
This is Bob's Movies.
Coming to you once again from Wiseguys in Salt Lake City, Utah.
All right.
This is exciting.
Jessica all the way.
We'll talk in a minute.
Jingle, Jessica.
It's close.
Too early for Christmas, this gentleman over here says.
Yeah, Scrooge.
It's Saturday, November 9th.
Not quite Christmas.
2019.
When I said we'll be discussing name tags in a moment, I wasn't kidding.
Let me see your name tags.
Salt Lake City has some great name tags
I saw the Royal
Ben and Bombs I saw that on
my Instagram or my
Twitter
hi back there
are you okay
and then we have Jessica
all the way and
uh oh more Christmas more Christmas, Ben.
Christmas Steven.
So you guys are just like, as long as the first letter is the same,
that's how puns work.
And this one I saw on the internet, too.
The Chris Lord of Chris Riggs.
Chris Return of Chris
King.
He replaced all the thes in that title
with the word Chris.
So now it's officially the movie title
with the most Chris's in it.
And yeah, most of the other ones
I can't see very well
because it's dark in here
and we're doing a show.
Great job, everybody.
I know I can always count on you guys to make lots
of them.
Good luck. Doug plugs.
Doug Loves Movies is back at UCB
Franklin in Los Angeles
this Tuesday, November 12th.
Next Saturday, oh, and I should say,
I booked somebody that's in a movie
that I'm pretty sure is going to get nominated for Best Picture
in a few weeks, February.
January.
January is when the nominations come out.
But the movie is amazing.
Anyway, next Saturday, Douglas Movies returns to the Improv in San Jose at 4.20.
And two weeks from today, November 23rd,
will be the first ever Douglas Movies taping in Miami, Florida.
Yeah, at the Improv there, also at 4.20.
Yeah, we'll see if anybody wants to go inside that early in the day
or get up that early in the day.
For tickets, go to MiamiImprov.com.
Let's look in the prize bag.
I brought some stuff out
from California.
I did a show at
Cobbs in San Francisco
last Saturday, so I brought you a copy
of San Francisco Magazine.
Yeah.
Probably a lot of good stuff in there.
I didn't crack it open.
From my friends at magical
butter silicone gummy trays to make your own gummies with whatever you want to put in them i
don't know what you guys are into jello gummies uh a douglas movies t. I believe that one is a large,
so hopefully that'll work out.
This is exciting.
The other night, I went to the premiere
of the Shia LaBeouf movie, Honey Boy,
and the ticket to the after party
was an old-fashioned motel room key
that says Honey Boy on it.
So I'm like, I'm going to put that in the prize bag.
Along with, I also saw a movie that's going to be on HBO soon,
a documentary called Well-Groomed,
about people who do fucked up things to their dogs.
And they gave out postcards, so I grabbed a postcard.
Not fucked up, just they make their dogs very colorful,
and some people think dogs might not
like that but i feel like poodles don't give a fuck they like the attention right and then a pin
that i don't know where i got this oh it says right on it diamond springs california i don't
think i've ever been there but anyway it's a pin that says pure life on it. And it looks like it's got a little,
it's very subtle weed pin. If you, if you need to keep it subtle for, for work or at home,
all of that is in the prize bag plus stuff brought by my guests. Are you ready to meet them?
Three great comics and friends of mine happened to be in Salt Lake City right now this weekend,
so they're on the show because I asked them and they said yes.
Please give it up for Chad Daniels, John Evans, and Jeff Tate.
Woo!
Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! Tate! T guests who aren't Jeff Tate.
That's just the new world that we're living in now.
Even, Jeff, did you know that I've done tapings of the show where people started chanting your name when you weren't even there?
I mean, I listen.
And guess what? I decided
you shouldn't have a microphone today.
As punishment
for your success.
Is it working
now? I think so. Okay,
great.
Let's meet my guests individually,
starting with a man who I'm pretty sure
has never done this show.
Never.
Never.
It's John Evans, everybody.
Thank you, Doug.
Thank you very much.
Featuring here,
all, as we like to say in the biz,
here at the Wise Guys
at the Gateway.
It's important to make that distinction.
There's some people trying to watch
Doug Lowe's movies in Ogden right now.
Those fucking morons. No, no, no, it's Mormons.
Oh, no.
Oh, here we go.
I guess I should jump right to
so the listeners know who's speaking.
That was Chad Daniels, everybody.
Hi, everybody.
Hi.
Hey, Doug. Hey. Hey, Doug.
Hey, good to see you.
Good to see you.
Also performing here this weekend,
the headlining shows here,
Last Night and Tonight.
Was last night fun?
It was great.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Good time?
Salt Lake City, you wouldn't think
that it's a great place to do comedy,
but it is.
Well, I'm just, listen,
I mean, when you're not from here,
you don't really know about it,
but the stories you hear.
And so you think there's no way people are going to laugh or have fun and then you do.
How do you guys have so much fun without drinking any
coffee first?
I mean, I probably do this every time I'm here and that's
a thing you're probably sick of,
but just for the fun of it, clap if you're a Mormon.
Sure.
That's how it is every time.
I think the whole city is like that.
Sure.
You know, just some nice random people.
What's that?
Well, it would be the other people that didn't clap, you fucking idiot.
To the other people.
I like to clap, and I'm not Mormon.
When am I going to get in the game?
Who's kind of Mormon?
Oh, that was awesome.
Who right now is in the same room with a Mormon?
Every goddamn one of us.
Oh, so good.
All right, so anyway, back to you, John.
Thank you so much for doing the show.
I can't believe we've known each other for how many years, you think?
Probably.
More than three or four.
Yeah, definitely.
Closer to ten.
And you've never been on.
Yeah, I've never been on, and I just say I feel slighted that this is the first time that you...
Well, let's make up for it, and you, first of all, be great today.
Okay.
Be a great guest.
Hello.
And then... It's a great guest. Hello.
It's a little late for that.
Moving forward, I'll have
you on every show. Every show?
Only if you're a great guest today.
All right. And I
do not think most people are great guests.
I'm on once
every eight months. Yeah.
That's how great you are. That's how good
you are. Because you're on the eight month plan. Absolutely. That's how great you are. That's how good of a guest I am. That's how good you are.
Because you're on the eight-month plan.
Absolutely, and I'll take it.
Yeah.
If people start chanting your name, then I'll have to bring you in more.
I didn't want Jeff to be here today.
But the people demand it.
They demand it.
They demand it in advance.
I just think it's the easiest name to chant.
It's easy. It is easy. think it's the easiest name to chant. It's easy.
It is easy.
But Chad's not that hard to chant.
It's even close to the word chant.
Chant Daniels is here, everybody.
It's not the worst thing I've been called.
That's for sure.
And just to reintroduce him again and get the chant going once more,
it's Jeff Tate. Woo!
And just to reintroduce him again and get the chant going once more, it's Jeff Tate.
That's pretty cool.
How you doing, Jeff?
Oh, sorry, Chad has a question. I was just going to say chanting Tate is like spelling bananas.
It really is on repeat.
Tate, Tate, Tate, Tate, Tate, Tate, Tate.
Nope, you don't need to.
I'm just saying.
That's that same guy that wanted to get into the clapping game.
I just want to be a fool.
Yeah.
He's like, I really want to participate.
I don't know why I'm sitting all the way in the back.
Participate.
Tate, Tate, Tate.
Participate. Participate. Participate.
But I was...
You flew in today, Jeff?
I did.
How'd that work out?
I was uneventful.
Just, I got on the...
Oh, fuck.
Right here, everything was on time.
Fuck.
Nice.
Nice job.
I mean, good job, Delta.
Good job, Delta. Good job, you did it.
And it's probably kind of,
it's probably warm weather here
compared to where you came from.
Shockingly, yeah.
Oh, shit.
Is my microphone off?
Your mic is going to go off
every time you're about to say something dumb.
Oh, fine.
I put in a requisition order
for one of these microphones like 12 years ago. How great would that be in your stand-up?
You're just going into something nobody's going to care about.
It just cuts out.
Oh, I've been on autopilot before.
Okay, so do you think we should try to swap out your mic,
or is it good to go?
I mean, if we can.
You know, if it's convenient, I mean.
I mean, do we, is there maybe another one standing by possibly,
or maybe you're holding it wrong?
I don't know.
I mean, I've done it.
I've held microphones before.
That's better.
Maybe do you want a mic stand?
If it's in the stand, maybe the
cord won't be jiggered.
Loose. Is that the right
word even? Probably not, but
we'll just move on.
New mic.
New mic. New mic.
New mic. New mic.
New mic.
How do you...
If he's new here, how do you... He has both microphones.
If he's new here, how do you know his name is Mike?
I can't remember which one I started with.
Uh-oh, now Jeff is...
He's holding both microphones that are unplugged,
and he has no idea which one is which.
Looks like an amazing three-way.
There we go.
Is that better?
Yay!
Yay!
All right.
So I guess you don't need this mic, Stan.
But it's here.
Okay, just in case.
Yeah, it's ready to go if you need it.
What do you got for the prize bag, Jeff?
I got four things on one thing.
See?
That's four things.
It's inside is a geode.
You smash it.
It's like a cool rock.
And then there's a jazz button and a tom petty button
yeah and then when you're done smashing that rock looking at all those crystals or whatever
you just got a cool bag free back too there you go
yeah that's like a gold rush bag. Yeah. I like it.
John Evans, what do you got?
I have a movie theme.
I went with a very exciting King Kong cola.
Yeah, it's a real cola, very drinkable.
And I also have a package of Black and Milds
individually wrapped with one missing
and there's one missing because i found it that way so
there you go thank you pleasure doing business with you cigar smoking can cause lung cancer
and heart disease that That's a rumor.
Also, aren't they just... That's just two of the things it could cause.
Disinterest from other people
would be a fun one to put on there.
Bad breath, yellow teeth, etc.
Sure.
Right?
But thank you for those.
Sure.
You have to sign a waiver to take that home, by the way.
Some of John's jokes are just for Jeff I've never seen this many people eating at a show there's
a lot of people eating yeah they can't do anything else they're not allowed to
do anything I heard one guy 15 feet away lick his finger. It's you. He's not married. That's the most action
he can get.
What?
Yeah, it's, you know, I mean,
maybe once you do some more of
once you get off the eight month program
and you do some more of my 420 shows,
it's like saying we're going to start
at 420-ish and
we serve food. So most people show-ish, and we serve food.
So most people show up high, they order the food.
Yeah, it's a whole system.
That's the other crazy thing about Salt Lake City, is a lot of people here get high.
I wish some of them were here today, because I really need the hookup.
What do you have for the bag, Chad?
I'm on a tour called New Hip Tour.
That's the t-shirt.
Nice.
And I have a bumper sticker from my last special.
It says, drive safe, don't rape.
Oh, great advice, you guys.
Two pieces of advice that will get you far.
Got some Mamba fruit chews.
Oh, those are good, right?
I got some strawberry flavored Pop Rocks.
Oh.
Put those in your butthole, I dare you.
I heard a kid put soda and Pop Rocks in his butthole
and he lived a pretty good life.
He never stopped smiling.
That's the urban legend. He's very happy.
And then orange Tic Tacs.
Oh, I miss these. I haven't had orange Tic Tacs
in a while. Don't put them in the bag. Keep them.
No, I don't miss them that much.
Okay.
They're fun for like two or three and then you're like,
oh, I got a whole thing of Tic Tacs
that are all orange flavor. I guess they won't be a sponsor on the show anytime soon but all of that i'm kind of afraid to
put the bottle in the uh in the gift bag because uh you know it's gonna break because i don't i
don't treat the gift bag very well just he just opened that geode.
Yeah, maybe.
He's ruined the fun on that. Oops, I'll try not to step on it
at any point during the proceedings.
Got some questions for you guys
before we get to the game portion of the show.
Starting with,
and we'll start with you, Jeff,
because I know you already have an answer ready to go.
What was the last movie you saw?
Jojo Rabbit, again.
I watched it again.
Again?
Yeah.
You're a two-timer.
Two-timer.
It's going to be three.
I'm going to watch it a lot, I think.
Yeah?
I like it.
It's pretty damn good.
I enjoyed it, yeah.
It's very, I like the message.
I've been calling it, oh. It's very... I like the message. I've been calling it...
Oh, that Hitler's bad?
I've been calling it...
I've been calling it
my number one movie of the year.
I still have a few more
of these prestige pictures
to check out,
but it's my favorite.
And there have been
a lot of good movies this year.
I think it's been a good year.
I think it's been
a real blimp of a year.
Once every 20 years every movie's good
is that true?
yeah 1999 was a good year
everybody keeps talking about it
well just cause they want to party like it
not cause it was a good year for movies
no they're like the matrix
and American beauty
they keep writing these blogs. I don't know.
I don't remember.
Those are the two examples of what a great year it was.
There's more,
but I don't remember them.
Gone in 60 seconds, maybe?
No.
No.
Okay, so yeah.
Thumbs up for Jeff
for Jojo Rabbit
is it I believe it's playing
in Salt Lake City currently
just opened yesterday here
so yeah check it out you guys
and throughout the world everyone
should see it it's very
good
it's great I've never
laughed so hard at Hitler
I mean that's true.
I know it sounds funny with the accent,
but it's also true.
Hitler is rarely a funny character.
But he does have a funny face and a funny voice,
and yeah, they pull it off.
It's really an interesting movie.
John Evans, last movie you saw?
This is going to
make me look like
a horrible contestant
but I saw the
Mark Maron movie
about the
Civil War sword
did anybody see it
Sword of Justice
Sword of Truth
Sword of Trust
Sword of Trust
it's one of the
many swords
that are out there
and
I haven't seen it yet
you liked it
I liked it a lot
and I like Maron
as an actor
I think he's fantastic.
He's a very good actor,
and this is one of those improvise-y movies, I think.
I liked it a lot.
I saw it.
Oh, you saw it too?
Yeah, I thought it was dope.
I also saw it for free on JetBlue on the way here,
so shout out to JetBlue for having...
A guy in front of me watched Taxi Driver.
So I was watching half Taxi Driver and half...
I want to clean up.
I should have rephrased my question.
What half a movie did you see most recently?
Half of Taxi Driver and half of...
I do peek at other people's screens
when there's other people.
You can see what they're watching.
I do tend to do that.
The guy in front of me was watching the news.
I'm like, come on, man.
We're on a plane.
Just disconnect.
Why don't you watch Taxi Driver or whatever?
You can finally find out what's going on in the world
while you're on a goddamn flight,
and Jeff is mad at it.
I want to know nothing about the world,
although I just want to fly at it. I want to know nothing about the world below. I just want to
fly over it.
Keep it out of my airspace.
Chad Daniels, last
movie you saw? Kung Fu Panda.
Okay, so
tell us about your adventure being stuck
in time.
Well, that's
my answer. Was it your
kids?
Yeah, my daughter had it on when I went downstairs.
But we all enjoy that movie.
The peach tree scene helped me get through a divorce.
What?
For the listeners, I just looked around the room befuddled.
Can you tell us how?
Just because it's such a fun scene?
That's a great scene.
It's a great message.
Look, people are nodding.
You can't fucking see the people nodding in here.
You can't.
No, it just sounds like nobody thinks you're making any sense.
That's fine.
This crowd doesn't fucking make any sense to me either.
How about that shit?
I can hear a guy licking his finger. People are looking around. How do you get
high? I do, kinda.
Everyone's... See, this is
how he stays on the eight-month plan.
Because he always
gets mad at the audience at some point.
This is
a big crowd of people who claim to smoke weed
who didn't watch a karate fight in Panda Bear.
You would think you would be on board
if you really smoked all that weed.
It was Kung Fu, Jeff.
I just don't know what the peach tree scene is.
I know what the peach scene is.
Call me by your name.
The peach tree scene is when they all go to Atlanta.
It's like a shopping montage.
I am shocked anyone in this room laughed at your reference to the names of streets in Atlanta.
I don't think they got it.
I just think they like them.
This is fucking skewed.
That's how much you like.
Skewed in here.
They chant his name.
He opens up and giggles at his own joke.
And they're like, I don't get it, but I like it.
Oh, this is going to be good.
Not now.
Not now, sir.
Wait for him to do something.
And this might be your chance, Jeff,
to really get him chanting.
Because my other question that I like to ask sometimes before we play the games is,
what impressions does anybody do?
Because I love impressions.
Oh, my God.
Do you do impression of a guy whose microphone works?
How come they replaced it with another broken microphone?
I think you're pulling the cord out.
I'm not.
It stops working when I
stop holding the cord in.
It's one of those where it's
loose and I can kind of fucking hold it.
I was hoping to just
not fuck it up again, but...
Well,
look at your hero. Can't use a microphone.
Pick real fucking winners
here in SLC, don't you?
Hello? Yeah.
They do pick winners, Chad.
Take, take, take.
There we go!
His microphone works.
Let's cheer.
And I get to sit
in the most comfortable position
known to man.
So I'm doubly lucky.
My microphone finally works
and man, this is a real load off.
Make sure I don't fall asleep, you guys.
I'm so comfortable.
It's like this or being in a hammock.
Those are equal.
You know, the mic stand's adjustable.
It starts working, so I'm afraid to touch it.
Well, I think it's...
I got it, Doug.
I'm cool, man.
Let me do my Liam Neeson impression, okay?
Deborah! Get under the bed
That's Ray Romano
No it's Liam Neeson
You're not
It's the altitudes playing tricks on your ears Doug
Deborah
You're about to be taken
Ma get under the bed.
Ma.
So I'm perfectly amnesian.
What else do you guys want to hear?
I could do George W. Bush.
Ma.
Ma.
I'm the president.
So it's not a current impression of George W. Bush.
No.
It's an old impression.
All right, John, do you have any impressions?
I do.
You do?
Oh, boy.
We on here?
Yeah, I got maybe a very obscure impression that some people...
Even better.
Fans of the movie Fast Times at Ridgemont High,
are you guys out there?
Ooh, this is good.
Yeah.
This is the ticket scalper, Mike Damone,
Mark Ratner's best friend.
This is the best...
This is going to be the best thing I've ever heard.
I can't...
What a very specific impression.
One actor playing one role in one movie.
Right, and he never did much.
Robert McManus.
This is Mike DeMone.
You know what?
I can see it already.
It's going to be just like last summer.
You fell in love with the girl at the photo mat.
You bought $40 worth of fucking film,
and you never even talked to her.
You don't even own a camera.
That's great.
It's going to be just like before.
You buy all this film and you don't even do anything.
I can do one too.
I do Mike Damone too.
Hey, stop buying all that fucking film.
It's not even a good Ray Romano.
Who said anything about Ray Romano?
I did a bunch of times
And you said Debra
Chad, what
Do you have any scenes from movies memorized?
Not movies, but I do do an impression
Do do
I do do do
Do
An impression
Hey everybody
My name's Jeff Tate.
Tate, Tate, Tate, Tate, Tate, Tate, Tate, Tate.
Now this is...
That's pretty good. That's a pretty good impression.
This is my Jeff Tate impression.
Hey, I'm Jeff...
Wow. Wow Painstaking detail
Shit that was funny
Painstaking detail on that impression
Doug
I almost couldn't put it back together again
That's not what I sound like at all
I hope these people on the side don't mind that Jeff leaning into his microphone is blocking everybody.
It's nice?
Okay, good.
I'm glad you're cool with it.
Well, that's it.
That's the end of Impressions Roundup.
That was a terrific addition to that.
But now I have to say, turn it off, Bert.
Let the games begin!
Oh, boy, do we have name tags.
Can we get that house lights up a little bit?
Oh, this guy's screaming that he's got something in addition to a name tag.
Just a little bit on the house lights so I could see a little bit better.
No?
Okay.
It's cool.
This is chaos.
People want donuts?
What you need to do, John, is you need to get up and go pick the name tag that you like the best for whatever reason.
Some have candy on them.
Some have Jeff Tate's face on them.
Some people might bribe you with French fries.
But while you go looking, John,
we're going to go to a brief commercial message.
While people are yelling,
people are right next to me yelling.
I'm just trying to go to commercial.
We'll be right back.
People are right next to me yelling.
I'm just trying to go to commercial.
We'll be right back.
Today's show is brought to you in part by Watchmen.
Can't get enough of HBO's Watchmen? Now you can go deeper inside the show critics have called your new TV obsession with the official Watchmen podcast.
podcast hosted by Watchmen executive producer and writer Damon Lindelof and Craig Mazin,
the creator of Chernobyl. The new podcast explores narrative choices, uncovers Easter eggs, and examines the show's connection to the groundbreaking graphic novel and to modern
events. A reimagining of the world originally seen in the groundbreaking 1980s graphic novel
of the same name, Watchmen is set in an alternate history of present-day America,
where the lines between vigilantes and masked crime fighters are blurred,
and the only true superhero is nowhere to be found on Earth.
Stylized, darkly funny, and profoundly human,
the series stars Regina King, Gene Smart, Don Johnson, and Jeremy Irons,
and features music from Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross.
Watchmen is available on streaming and on demand
and catch new episodes Sundays at 9 p.m. on HBO.
Then listen to the official Watchmen podcast available on all major podcast platforms.
Back to the show.
We're back!
Yeah.
This is so funny.
And now we can bring the house lights down
because I just wanted them up for
that part that ended
so now you can bring them
back down.
The speed at which
these cues are accomplished.
There's two lighting cues in my entire show.
Who are you playing for, Jeff?
I don't know, but it says Indiana Tate and the Temple of Turlip.
Is your name Turlip?
Last name Turlip.
I would hope it's your last name.
Hi, my name's Turlip.
I mean, this is some excellent... You know what? It's a bad last name, too. name hi my name's Turlip it just looks cool I get to be Indiana Jones in this one yeah it's great he took the laser disc or something of the movie yeah
maybe the soundtrack or the soundtrack no? No, Laserdisc. It's not a soundtrack. Okay.
Don't care anymore.
And he set it down where I couldn't see it anymore.
Just put it down on the ground like, there you go.
Although it doesn't say Turlip on it.
I'm just going to have to remember that.
But I saw that on the internet today. He really took a shot that you were going to be here,
and he didn't put anybody else on it.
Pretty smart, Turlip. Internet today. He really took a shot that you were gonna be here and he didn't put anybody else on it pretty
pretty smart Turlip
What's your real? What's your real real? Hey, what's your what's your first name Mike? Okay, let's call him Mike. Oh
No, that's my nemesis
Today anyway, you're just against Mike's in general. How do you feel about mic and the mechanics?
I'm scared of them today.
No mics work near me today.
Oh, now I get it.
John,
who are you playing
on behalf of?
Looks like you got
a real score there.
Yeah, no,
definitely a score.
This is the Life Aquatic
with Steve Zaynu.
Zane has been changed.
Wow, I just thought a guy named Steve would pick that.
But the reason I took it is because it's got the zebra rolls on there
with Chad Daniels' blames for blowing up that last 15 pounds overweight.
That's what he says on stage anyway.
So I thought maybe I could get him in some kind of crosshairs.
You see that?
Yeah.
Zebra rolls, not the cake.
What the fuck is a zebra roll?
It's not the cake.
It's a cake that you turn into a roll, and it's amazing.
And I can eat it by the box, and it's why I have tits.
It is.
There's no other explanation.
I didn't change anything but those.
I mean, man, just either don't eat the things or stop bitching about your tits.
That's the rule.
I'm going to eat that whole box.
I don't give a shit about my tits.
Yeah, I'm going to take advice from a guy who broke two mics.
They love you here.
It's not even fun.
We've been friends for over 15 years,
and I can't even make fun of you
because they all want to rub your nuts,
and it's gross.
I know,
maybe you should find
a new angle, Chad.
Stop being such a fucking bully.
Children, children, children,
children.
Jeff,
what do you think
this box of zebra cake rolls
goes for in the store?
Retail value.
Oh man, that's $1.99.
Oh, you saw it earlier.
No, I just know how much
a box of Zane is. You just know that?
You think I don't have that in my weekly
budget?
Alright, so Zane is your
name? Yes. Okay, good job Steve
Zane do. And what do you got, Chad?
I have, I'm playing for Stephen.
Whoa, that was was i didn't even
see your drink there sorry and he went with uh a christmas steven right here that's cute and he
also has a christmas sweater on i really appreciated the thematic uh uh effort it's you know it's a
star every time i talk they stop making noise and that's fine and what's that this is fudge because
one of the characters is saying fudge to not swear,
and then there's a whole box of Mrs. Cavanaugh's famous fudge.
Oh, she's great.
I think that's called fuck.
What they did was they switched them.
Oh, I didn't know that.
Yeah.
Solid.
I heard Mrs. Cavanaugh and Little Debbie are having a thing
right here on the stage in front of us. Solid. I heard Mrs. Cavanaugh and Little Debbie are having a thing.
Right here on the stage in front of us.
All right, so congratulations to those three folks.
One of you, named Turlip, is going to go home with all the prizes.
Oh, may I have a Tito's and Soda, a tall one?
Thank you.
I came out here with nothing to drink, so this root beer has been looking really good.
It's cola.
Oh, that's why it looks so good.
King Kong Cola.
I thought it was root beer.
Just regular cola masquerading as root beer.
I mean, they're even kind of laughing at that.
And that's nonsense.
No, Chad is already alarmed that that got any laughter at all.
Right on the money.
It's fucking making my blood boil.
Steven, I need you to finish those fries,
because I'm going to need your help in about five and a half minutes.
Let's take down Tate and shove it off everybody's ass in here.
Also, you're not going to need his help for a good 30, 40 minutes.
Okay, great.
Yeah, he can relax and enjoy his fries.
Chad seems pretty tense for having just done yoga.
He's like, I like to get centered before, you know, clear my head.
He comes out here and fucking yells at everybody?
Just imagine if I didn't do yoga.
His mantra is, fuck you people.
He just keeps thinking that.
Fuck you people.
Fuck you people.
Fuck.
Yeah, it's true.
Like, you know, I've screamed at people on this show out of frustration.
And, yeah, it would have been much worse if I didn't get high first.
Alright, so the first game we're going to play today is, unfortunately
Chad, I hate to do this to you,
it's a game that Jeff is very
good at. That's fine.
But it's also, this first game,
it doesn't matter who wins it.
It's just for fun.
It's called Purple Rain Man.
It's interesting.
The same people that clap for being Mormon
clap for that game.
To a person.
This is a game where I give you a title.
I should say I give you the actors
that are in a mashup title.
Like Purple
Rain Man, of course.
The first built people in Purple Rain
Man would be Prince
and Dustin Hoffman.
Purple Rain Man.
Sure. I love the game. I'm not
good at it. I love listening to it.
Well, get your
ears ready.
good at it. I love listening to it.
Well, get your ears ready.
Because some love is coming your way right now.
Perfect.
Oh, thank you.
Drinks are here just in time.
Thank you, thank you.
Oh, that's beautiful. Thank you so much.
Oh, and picking up the old ones.
You're so great. Thank you so much.
That's Erin, everybody.
That's Erin.
If Erin's in your section,
give her a big tip, you guys.
And if she's not,
whoever is serving you,
don't worry about it.
No, I've actually been told by the waitstaff at clubs
that the people that come to my shows eat a lot.
Yep, that's true.
One, and are super cordial and nice.
Absolutely agree with that as well.
And good tippers.
Yeah, that's great.
I just make up that last one just to get them to be good tippers.
But I was laughing before the drinks arrived
because I always fill out all these games on a piece of paper,
and I never wrote the specific details in this game.
I never wrote them down.
And so...
So I'm going to have to do an approximation
of what the billing would be in these two movies.
But I think...
The scales are tipping.
I like this.
Like when it rains when I golf, I'm way better.
Let's go.
So hopefully this will work.
I mean, it'll still work.
Everyone on the panel still has to try to guess what the hell I'm talking about.
Okay, so I'm going to go with third build.
I'm going to say Ruth Gordon and Jon Hamm.
Oh!
Somebody made that noise
in the back.
Probably that same guy.
Oh!
Oh!
See, there he goes.
I don't know why I encouraged it.
Second build
in this
mashup would be
John
Cassavetes
and Jamie
Fox.
Don't
guess anything, please.
Is it bringing up Baby Driver?
No!
Is it bringing up Baby Driver? No! Is it close?
Is it, where's that Baby Driver?
Is that a baby driver?
Something that ends in baby.
I'm still waiting to recognize a name from one of the movies.
Jamie Foxx, he played for the Detroit Tigers in the 50s.
Oh, thank you.
He really will laugh at anything he says.
It's incredible.
And first build would be,
and these I know for sure,
Mia Farrow and Ansel Elgort.
Okay, so Chad is out.
Rosemary's Baby Driver.
That's it.
Rosemary's Baby Driver.
Ooh, nice sixth guess.
Compared to what, zero?
Yeah, I'm still at 1,000% O for O
He's got all of his non-answers not wrong
It's like I've been to the plate three times and walked every time
No, you did not get to any base.
But you might now because it's still anybody's game.
Jeff gets to go first in a round of whose tagline is it anyways?
I'm going to say to Jeff Tate and to Jeff Tate alone,
I mean, everyone else is going to hear it,
but I'm going to say the tagline of a motion picture.
This is a tough game, but somebody's got to do it.
And Jeff will respond or pass.
And if he gets it right, he gets a point.
But if he misses it, then it moves to you, John Evans.
And same thing with you to Chad.
And we just go around like that.
Whoever gets the most right will win.
But it's tough.
There's a lot of movies out there
and a lot of taglines that don't make any sense.
Especially if you don't know what movie we're talking about.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! any sense. Especially if you don't know what movie we're talking about.
Jeff Tate,
unleash your wild side.
Unleash
your wild side.
I like that. I like when people repeat it back.
Well, I learned that by watching the Spelling Bee.
They go, arachnophobia, hmm.
Okay, but don't ask me to use it in a sentence.
Because it already is one.
At least your wild side.
I'm going to say...
Country of origin?
Yeah, is this an American film?
No questions.
I'm going to say Rugrats Go Wild.
Oh, okay.
No.
John Evans, do you have an idea what this might be?
I'm going to guess Deuce Bigelow, Male Gigolo.
Unleash Your Wild Side.
That's not...
I mean, it wouldn't be
A great tagline
For that movie
But it also
Fits I guess
Chad what do you think
I'm gonna go with
Stella got her groove back
If Jeff would've said that
They'd be fucking
Clapping right now
That's a great guess
Nope I don't need it
Listen
Let it happen organically
But god damn Let's get on board here Alright Chad Let's see what happens No, I don't need it. Listen. Let it happen organically.
But goddamn, let's get on board here.
All right, Chad, let's see what happens.
Is it when Stella got her groove back?
You didn't even say it right.
It's not when Stella got her groove back.
If?
This isn't Jeopardy. It's just...
She just got it back, man.
It's one of those movies that fucking tells you
what's going to happen before you even see it.
That's why I never saw it.
The title's a spoiler.
Stella got her groove back.
Okay, why do I need to go?
Oh, it is called How?
How?
Did Stella get her groove back one day?
Taye Diggs, that's how.
It was by fucking.
Yeah.
She really got her mojo back with all that D.
That vacation D.
The working title was
How Stella Got Her Fuck On Back Going Again.
The control group didn't like it?
It was smart that they changed it, yeah.
How Stella Got Her Groove Back
is not the answer.
Jeff, you don't even get another guess.
We haven't even said what the answer is yet.
It's from Dora and the Lost City of Gold.
Damn it.
I knew that.
Yeah.
Right?
See, this is tough.
That movie came out on my birthday.
See, that's the kind of thing that happens,
is Jeff will prove that he does know way more about a movie than he should,
just didn't recognize the tagline.
I got another one for you, buddy.
Excellent.
If you run, it will get you.
If you stay, it will get you if you stay it will eat you
seems like you're gonna get eaten either way i mean it's gonna it seems like a very tough
place to walk away from and that's your only option you can't run or stay so oh you're saying
just turning in here, aren't they?
I like what's happening.
He's just talking.
He wasn't trying to be funny.
Yeah, I wasn't, Chad.
I was doing what you do.
Come see Jeff do a guest set during my headlining set here at Wise Guys tonight.
Oh!
And now, did the show sell out
before word got out
that Jeff would be here?
Because I think it did.
Two shows tonight, though.
Is there some seats available?
There are not.
So there you go.
But that's just because
Salt Lake City's a good comedy.
Who's got tickets already? Nice! Thank. So there you go. But that's just because Salt Lake City is a good comedy. Who's got tickets already?
Nice!
Thank you for coming to this. You could have just
seen him later.
Appreciate it.
Where are we at? John? Evans?
Could you repeat the tagline again?
If you run, it will get you. If you
stay, it will eat you.
I didn't even guess.
Oh, you think you know it?
Yeah, the blob. Nope.
John?
Cujo.
You know,
I think it's rude to call him
It.
He does have a name.
Let's try. I'm going to
try a different version of this.
If you run, Turlip will get you.
Stay, Turlip will eat you.
Is it my turn?
Yes.
I'm going to go with How Stella Got Her Groove Back.
Oh!
Okay, I apologize.
These are going to get maybe not easier,
but the movies are going to be a little less obscure than this one.
But this is a movie called City of God from Brazil in 2002.
But if people have not seen it, you have to check it out.
It's really fucked up.
It's about street gangs in Brazil
and when I say gangs I'm talking
kids that aren't even 12 yet
it's really intense
tweens
yes
it's tweens
I've seen that on the ratings sometimes
of a movie it'll say you know
strong language, drinking, smoking
all involving tweens.
And I'm just like, come on, just
you don't have to use that word
in a serious
description of what's
to keep your kids away from in the movie.
Or to lure some men into
the movie.
Ooh, tweens are gonna be
naked?
Who said
naked? He said drinking. What does drinking going to be naked? Who said naked?
He said drinking.
What does drinking lead to, Jeffrey?
I think you're weird.
Try to put it on me.
All right, we're back to you, Jeff.
Get carried away.
Get carried away. Get carried away.
Oh, I got it.
Carry.
Oh.
Oh, yes.
That was fantastic.
But the remake one.
Oh, great.
John?
I'm going to say up.
Oh, okay.
That would be a good tagline for that movie.
Dang, I'm not right again.
I want to apologize to the guy with the zebra cakes.
Man, I really apologize.
Well, these are tough.
You know, the next game, you'll do better.
Just by the nature of it but chad what do you
think it is get carried away rudy now that would be a big big spoiler in the title you'd be waiting
the whole movie when's he when's he gonna get carried away see you can't be mad at jeff how way.
See, you can't be mad at Jeff at how hard he laughs at what you're saying. That was very nice.
That was the tagline
for Sex and the City, the movie.
Oh, still
a Carrie, though. Her name is Carrie, yeah.
You kind of got it, Jeff.
You were on the right track.
But you crashed into a wall.
I know.
So that track was not right at all.
It was a fake tunnel
painted on a wall. Is that what you
just said?
No.
Not even close, really.
Wrong track? Come on. Cartoons?
That's right. You guys don't watch cartoons.
Unless it's got a panda and something to do with a peach tree.
Jeff?
There is no justice without sin.
Oh, boy.
Sex in the City 2
full title
the movie
I actually just added the movie part last time
to describe it
for some reason they don't go with the subtitles
on the Sex and the City movies.
I don't know why.
John? I feel like
I'm the only person here trying to actually win this thing.
I'm going to
say Sin City. That is correct.
Boom! Boom!
Boom!
Goes the dynamite.
Look at Joe. Boom. Boom. Goes the dynamite. He's just in a zen-like state
knowing that the next game he's going to crush.
But I'm on. I got momentum, though.
We're trying to get him right? I didn't know we were trying to get him right.
Okay.
That's convenient.
I'm just glad I don't have to go first in this next one.
Chad's next.
He sure is.
Let's do it.
All right, Chad.
What movie had the tagline,
Carry On?
Rudy.
No, that's not my guess.
Carry On would be... You're going to carry on. He's taking my guess. Carry on would be...
You're going to carry on.
He's taking it back.
You're going to keep going.
You're going to carry on.
Up.
That's true.
He did need to move on.
Carry on.
Jeff?
I'm going to say Sex in the City 2.
That is correct.
I mean, that one was just
handed to you, Chad.
I'm a setter.
It's what I do.
But for the record,
I think it should have been called
Sex in the City 2, Sex and Abu Dhabi.
Because that's where they went.
And it's a fun place to stay.
All right, so John has one and Jeff has one.
We've got one more before we might have to move to a tiebreaker.
But Jeff, wait, Chad goes first.
So you're a spoiler, Chad.
You could make a three-way tie happen right here.
No, I couldn't.
Let me remind you, and maybe I haven't mentioned it yet,
so this is good for me to tell you.
A theme could emerge in this game.
So far we have
Dora and the Lost City of Gold,
City of God,
Sex in the City,
Sin City,
Sex in the City 2.
What is the tagline?
What movie
is this a tagline for?
It's a weird one.
Part mystery, part thriller,
parts missing.
Bright Lights, Big City.
I do have a second tagline from the same movie
if you'd like to hear it.
I would love to.
You'll never know what bit you.
See, that's clearly not bright lights big city will you repeat the first one please and i know that i'm not trying to be a dick i'm being serious
being a serious dick
part mystery part thriller, parts missing.
I don't know any movies.
Well, now this is extra pressure.
Jeff just threw his hands up because he knows it.
I don't know.
Is there a movie called Piranha City or some shit?
Stop laughing!
I'm just kidding. I've been asking for it all day and it finally happened and now I'm mad.
Alright, Jeff.
Man, I was going to say Piranha City.
Let's wait and see if that's the answer.
What do you think it is, Jeff?
Is it Dark City?
No.
Oh, shit!
Yes!
Did you just?
No, I'm just...
Oh, shit!
My pants!
John, this is your big chance.
Yeah.
You could take Jeff down.
It's only going to get worse if you keep saying that.
I'll give you the two taglines again.
Please.
Part mystery, part thriller, parts missing.
And you'll never know what bit you.
Oh, I forgot the second one.
Is it Manimal?
It's Manimal, isn't it?
Is it a failed TV series?
No, it is not.
Damn.
Is it Sharky's Machine?
No.
But how do you think that fits into the theme?
Oh, you bet him.
There's got to be a city.
Shark City.
I meant city heat.
Does there have to be a city?
If there isn't, I'm going to be so mad at you.
The answer is Lake Placid.
Oh, shit.
Now you know where this is headed.
But, Chad, I'm sorry to say, for this game alone, you're out.
So pretend you have Jeff's microphone and don't say anything.
This is just between Jeff and John.
I'm going to read a tagline,
and the first one of you that says the title back correctly
is going to be the winner of this game.
I'm going to see both of your faces,
because this is going to go fast.
Times at Ridgemont High.
What movie
had the tagline
Who is Salt?
Salt.
That's correct.
It's a condiment.
What are we talking about?
It's a movie?
Tate. Tate. Tate. Tate.
Tate. Tate. Tate. Tate.
I'll just take my beating like a man, I guess.
Yeah, but that's what happens when you find all the movies
that have city or lake or salt in them.
And then if I was going to do one more,
I was going to do Assault on Precinct 13.
Wow.
I did not see that coming Me either
Four cities in a row
And he goes
There's a theme
Piranha City
Is there
I always forget to mention
The theme part
Until
There's really clearly a theme
Sometimes there isn't
Anyway
Enough goofing around Nobody brought donuts today? really clearly a theme. Sometimes there isn't. Anyway.
Enough goofing around.
Nobody brought donuts today? That's interesting.
That's a shift.
Oh, there they are. Donettis.
Yeah.
Thank you for bringing them. Is it Donettis or
Donettes? It's Donettes.
It's a running gag on
the show that Emma
Arnold on this very stage,
admitted that her whole life she thought they were pronounced Donatys.
Like Italian donuts?
Yeah.
I wanted some of Donatys.
I don't like the big Donatys.
I like a Donatys.
I was saying recently on the show that that stupid Italian accent,
that's the last accent you can make fun of.
Like that you can do and nobody goes, hey, stop doing that.
People don't get uncomfortable.
I guess maybe because they're mobbed up or whatever,
they don't worry about it.
You should come to my house sometime.
Actually, people got more mad at that show, The Sopranos,
than they do at that accent.
Really?
Yeah, because they thought that show was making it seem like
every Italian is a gangster, and we know it's like only 90%.
I think it's unfair because it made me think
that all Italian people could sing.
We'll just rewind it and start it over.
I honestly was not interested in that show
just when I heard the title.
I was like, what?
It's like a choir?
A bunch of sopranos?
I don't give a shit.
What is that, a guy?
God damn it.
Somebody murder that show.
Let's play Last Man or Woman Stanton.
or woman Stanton.
Now this is going to be an interesting one.
John, this is a game that Chad and Jeff have played before.
Jeff unfortunately excels
at it.
You'll be
given the name of an
actor or actress and maybe
even multiple actors or actresses,
and then we're going to, I play along on this one.
We're going to take turns naming movies that they were in.
And if you can't think of one, you're out,
except you can go to your lifeline.
You can go to Zane.
Jeff can go to Mike.
And you can go to a Christmas
Steven, Chad. I love it. Let's do it.
If you need to. And you can only go to them once.
I say this
every time. Doesn't hurt to use your
lifeline early.
Steven, be ready.
He looks so ready.
He took a little drink to make sure he'd be able to talk.
He's like, hmm.
He looks so ready.
He took a little drink to make sure he'd be able to talk.
He doesn't want to be all hoarse when he has to go,
Miss Congeniality.
I'm sorry.
It's hard to say congeniality when you've got a throat thing.
And who's this sitting next to you, Stephen?
Who is that?
Jessica. Jessica. Oh, yeah, Steven? Who is that? Jessica.
Jessica.
Oh, yeah, we saw her name tag.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
What's your relation to Jessica?
Just say it.
You guys make rings?
So who is she to you?
He won't do it.
My wife!
My wife! Hey!
Yeah!
Hey, Steve.
Very nice.
Okay.
You tried so hard not to say it. He wasn't going to say it.
I've never had that happen.
He held up his left hand, pointed to his wedding ring.
They're not used to
saying wife singular
here.
I didn't know how to make it fit.
I'm sorry, everybody.
If you're not careful, Jeff, somebody's going to give you a
tabernacle sandwich.
I just thought of that.
Okay, so where is...
I preselected some folks on Twitter.
Where is Bill Baio
Bill Bao underscore Baggins
Hi
What's your actual name?
Kim
Thanks for
Asking to participate Kim
In a polite way through the internet
You said
You have one of the
A name you have never
heard before
on the show?
Or you said it's a great
one. You really talked it
up.
That's why I'm going
to you first.
So what do you got?
Christian Bale.
That is not bad at all.
I do like that one.
I think we've played him
on the show before,
but I'll still take it.
Looking at these guys,
seeing what they think.
Chad's not happy.
Well, I don't know anything.
You don't know any
Christian Bale movies?
I mean, I've seen them,
and I'm sure I know
I could describe them.
You know me.
I'm very descriptive.
That's interesting,
because he's kind of a
he looks different in everything he's in.
Yeah. So how would you describe
him? No, I could describe the movies.
And then everyone goes, yeah, no shit. The crowd
is like, oh, that's fun. Always so disappointed in me
and it's like this is the hardest game
for me to play. Reminds me of my dad.
I'm going to make a note with this end of the pen that doesn't
write. I'm going to make a note
that I do think that would be a fun game
to play this game with three people that are terrible at it,
and they have to describe the movie until I figure out what they're talking about.
Looks like I'll be back before eight months.
Oh, that's how you secure a rebooking.
It's all content.
That's how you get a job where you're working for free.
All right, so we got Christian Bale.
Now let's go to a gentleman who on Twitter likes to go by the name Guys Hiding.
That's me.
That's our friend Ben.
Yeah.
Ben, why do you call yourself Guys Hiding?
We use it for our podcast, Guys Hiding.
You have a podcast called Guys Hiding from what?
From their wives.
From their wives.
And your wives just...
You can't do it with your wives.
Their wives.
That's not how it works.
Their wives.
Yeah, don't stop doing that.
It's one very specific...
I can't have more than one expression
where I'm expected to yell that out.
It's already awkward enough in my daily life.
All right.
I still haven't written down Christian Bale.
Let me write that down.
Okay, so...
So your wives are women
that don't know that podcasts are a thing.
Well, she's the one that came up with the name for it.
Your wife came up with it because she knows you're using it just to get away from her?
Yeah.
And do you listen to it?
Yeah.
You do?
Yeah.
So it's accomplishing nothing.
She's hearing everything you're saying, so your hiding is ineffective.
You know, you can't go have a private conversation with the boys is what I'm saying.
It does give her an hour off.
Oh, I wish it was that short.
People make hella long podcasts these days.
Which reminds me,
12 Guests at Christmas is coming up soon, so...
Which reminds me, 12 Guests of Christmas is coming up soon, so... Get ready for three hours of semi-entertainment.
All right, Ben, what's your suggestion for this game today?
Michael Myers.
So it's all the Halloween films and Baby Driver.
All right, let's see who else we got where is Cali superstars
right there hi what's your actual what Bob and what what does Cali superstars
mean you have a fantasy football team called Cali
Superstars? Are you from California?
Originally.
What's your suggestion?
Christopher Walken.
Christopher Walken.
Okay.
Chad is still
upset.
I know there are a ton of movies, smartass.
I just don't know them.
I hope you lose this Sunday in fantasy, you jerk.
Well, that's not fair, Chad.
I'm just kidding.
Who could he have said that you would know?
Jeremy Renick?
That's interesting.
Yes, Jeremy Renick.
Thank you.
The hockey player?
Do you have a...
Because we have in the past done a version of this game
where I let the guest pick which names we use
so you could pick somebody whose films you know.
But what you're saying is you just generally,
you know actors by sight,
but you don't really keep track of anything.
I think I'll get through four or five rounds of this one.
Because we got three big names. That's what I'm saying. Those guys have made a lot of movies through four or five rounds of this one. Because we got three big names.
That's what I'm saying. Those guys have made a lot of movies.
Four or five rounds is not great,
but it will be the furthest I've ever made it.
Let's see if one more person
has an interesting name. Oh, shit.
Yeah, a lot of people
from this audience reached out, and I appreciate that.
I like to get people involved.
Where is P-
or underscore pizzazz?
Hey.
What's P pizzazz mean?
Oh, my God.
It's a long, quiet answer.
It's like it reminds me of Kung Fu Panda 2 when he's on the roof.
Another great Kung Fu Panda scene.
Thank you, I've seen them all.
When he's on the roof?
Yeah.
When he's on the roof yelling at the pickup.
Okay.
You said roof the first time.
Roof.
Which is how some people say it.
I have no idea what I said.
Roof.
Yeah, people do say roof.
Yeah.
What's your suggestion,
Pizzazzatazzmatazz?
Julia Roberts. Finally
we get a lady suggesting
a lady.
Should have went to her first and only
because Julia Roberts, boy, she's been in a lot
of movies. What is happening
over there?
What's that?
Okay.
That was the quickest bail
I've ever heard.
If hecklers would retract
like they do in trials,
that'd be so great.
Withdrawn.
Strike that from the record.
I have to ask everyone
to pretend that they didn't hear that.
record. I have to ask everyone to pretend that they didn't hear
that.
Don't let it affect your decision
later.
Okay,
so I think we should narrow
this down to two of
the four people. It's so disappointing. I've been thinking
about it the whole time.
Narrow it down
for, like, let Chad do whatever he wants.
Let Chad name it from any form.
No, that's not fair.
And then narrow it down for me and John.
Wait, John, do you feel like you're going to be good at this?
No, not at all.
But, I mean, like Chad, I think I've got a few rounds in me.
I'm not going to go out immediately.
Okay, so this is fun.
And apologies to the people whose name tags are chosen
because you're sitting there now going,
why are you making it so Jeff is going to lose?
But I'm not.
I'm just making it exciting.
Jeff, pick one of those four names.
And that'll be the only one you can name movies from.
Oh, shit.
What?
What were the names again?
Christian Bale. Mike Myers. Mike Myers. Oh, no. Chris Dworkin the names again? Christian Bale.
Mike Myers.
Mike Myers.
No.
It's not going to be Mike Myers.
That's crazy.
I just got excited until I realized I'm still going to lose.
Yeah.
All right.
I'm going to say.
Christopher Walken or Julia Roberts.
I'm going to say Christopher Walken.
Okay.
You probably know some movies he's been in that I've never even heard of.
So I think he'll do pretty good.
I think he'll be alright.
But you guys could steal Walkens from him.
I said a great strategy would be
start with your Christopher Walken movies.
Yeah, and then when you're out of Christopher Walkens
just dive over to one of the others.
This is going to be great.
I can't wait.
I almost swore. I'm so excited.
Wait,
are you a non-swearer? I swear
all the time, you know. Yeah, but on podcasts
and stuff? I swear, but then I thought I'd already
done it too much, so I thought I'd stop.
Oh, okay. You decided to dial it fucking
back?
Correct.
Because those are my favorites. There's no reason for
that word to be in there. They split an infinitive with the F word?
Yeah.
Or just a word.
Un-be-fucking-lievable.
Like, that is tough to spell.
I before E.
I used to like to say fan-fucking-tass-fucking-tick.
I'll say it again later today.
Now that I remember it.
Okay, so, to recap.
Jeff won the last game, so he's going to go first.
Then we're going to go, oh, this is going to happen to me as well.
Maybe I should just pick one person.
I'm going to just do Julia Roberts.
Yeah. I'm going to just do Julia Roberts. Yeah.
I like it.
Christopher Walken's probably been in more movies
than Julia Roberts, so I don't think I'll win.
So we'll start with Jeff,
then we'll go to John,
then Chad, and then me.
And to be clear, it's Bale and...
Yeah, we get Bale and Mike Myers.
You get Mike Myers.
Yeah.
Wait, Bale and Myers.
Oh, okay.
You get all of them.
All right.
You get everybody.
You get Chris Walken, Christian Bale, Mike Myers, and Julio.
Okay.
All right.
Robert Sosa.
All right, so I go first?
Mm-hmm.
Watch this, everybody.
Wayne's World 2.
Watch him go.
Well, that just took
one of the nine
Mike Myers movies
off the board.
That was my first movie.
I know.
Okay, I'm going to say...
I thought you were only supposed to do...
Oh, I get it.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
I get it now.
Yeah, strategizing.
Now I get it.
Okay, all right.
I'll try to strategize a little bit.
Who are the names again?
That's not going to work.
Yeah, I got it.
I'm just going to go early dive on Julia
and then try to go chronological,
and I'll start with satisfaction.
Chad?
Catch me if you can.
Well, start running.
But if I catch you, I am going to eat you.
We already learned that earlier.
I'm about to get my groove back.
John?
I'm going to go deer hunter.
Very good.
I'm going to say America's Sweethearts.
He just stuck his tongue out. Why are you?
I just want the listeners to know what happened.
Christopher Walken's in it.
He is?
Yeah.
Weird.
I know.
I didn't think he and Julia had worked together before.
No, turns out they did.
Okay, I'm
going to go with...
I didn't mean to stick my tongue out.
I meant to make the noise, that
part.
Like, I meant to wink and make that noise,
that clicky noise, but everything
went wrong.
Yeah, you just stuck your tongue out and lick that dirty microphone I forgot I don't know how to wink and that kind of fucked up the rest of it too you look like that Instagram cat with its tongue half
out right right when he falls off a table that's my general look is when a cat falls off a table
that's the expression on my face. Doug,
it's your turn. Yeah, we do have a limited amount
of time.
I'm going to say
a mystic pizza.
Oh. Don't that is...
I'm going to say Pulp Fiction.
Okay.
Because you have a watch up your butt.
Yeah, so.
John?
American Psycho.
Wait, did the order get all fucked up?
That's right.
That's right?
Okay, sorry.
American Psycho.
Very good.
Jeff?
I'm going to say The Dead Zone.
Good one.
Right?
It's a scary movie about when your phone doesn't work.
Mm-hmm.
You know what would make it even scarier?
Oh, no.
If you were a pretty woman.
Back to you, Chad.
I'm going to say Aaron Brockovich.
Nice.
Someone just say ha and then oh?
Yeah, that's what I do.
I got it.
That's Julia Roberts for your ass.
For your ass.
Instead of for your consideration,
I should say for your ass.
John?
American Hustle.
Who's in that?
Christian Bale.
Christian Bale.
Jeff?
I forgot for a second.
Jeff?
Envy.
Okay.
Okay.
No, it's right.
I mean, nobody cares, but it's still right.
Oh, I thought of another Italian one.
A runaway bride.
Has anyone seen my wife?
She ran away.
Oh, man, you made me forget my answer.
That was so funny.
She got the sprinter speed, you know?
It's Jeff's turn, though, right?
I think it's my turn.
Oh, okay.
You guys are switching the order around.
Are we?
Yeah.
It's going like this.
Okay.
I'm after you, I think.
Okay.
That's what they say. Okay. At the beginning, I said, Jeff's going to go in like this. Okay. I'm after you, I think. Okay. That's what they say.
Okay.
At the beginning, I said, Jeff's going to go first, then John, then Chad, then me.
So I don't know how it got.
I guess that works.
That's right.
Yeah.
It goes around in a circle.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm going to finally figure out how this game works.
All these years.
I'm going to go with Pelican Brief.
Keeping it short.
Stop making these what noises.
Just because you haven't heard of shit.
What?
You know, in his defense...
Aaron Brock a what?
The Pelican what?
Let me see here.
This guy, he's worse than my stepmom.
You waiting for me to go?
Now we're back to Jeff?
No, me.
Wait, what?
He said one, then I did.
You went. You said Runaway Bride. I said Pelican Brief.
He said what?
Alright, so I went
out of turn.
I'll go
Batman Dark Knight.
The Dark Knight
What do you want to call it?
Yeah that's a good name for it
Oh look at that
We're getting some new drinks
I'll have another one
Yeah
Jeff
Well John's answer
Sounded like so much fun
Now I want to say
A Batman movie
Batman Returns
Sneaky
I mean, yeah
Yeah
Stepmom
Chad
I am going to go with
Ocean's Eleven
Yeah, that's right
I studied Julia Roberts
all fucking morning
Well, John
I think you're in a pretty good spot here
That's what you think
I'm searching for a
Let's see
You also have Zane
Zane, Lifeline
Yeah, I gotta go Lifeline
Zane, don't say the obvious one
Give him one that's tougher um 310 to yuma that sounds about right yeah christian bale's in that
that's a great movie jeff that's not fair He was going to say the obvious one,
and now you get to say it,
because I can't say it,
because I have to say the prophecy.
What makes you think I'm going to say Oceans 12?
The fact that I just said it, Chad?
Sure.
Great.
I'm going to go with Wind's World.
Oh, yeah.
That's been laying out there this whole time. John? I'm going to go with Wingsworld. Oh, yeah. That's been laying out there this whole time.
John?
I'm going to go Bohemian Rhapsody.
Oh, who's in that?
Mike Myers.
That's right.
Good one.
Jeff?
Annie Hall.
Ooh.
Deep, deep, deep Christopher Walken cut.
I'm going to say, flat to lioners.
Oh, Lord.
I am going to say the boxer.
The fighter.
The lover. And the retreatist and pick one which one of
those would you like to go I would like to say the fight okay but I mean what
was he doing in it so now tell me yeah
doing in it, so now tell me.
Is it the end of the road, John?
Let me dig deep.
Oh, geez.
Yeah, I think I'm out.
I can't.
You did so good.
Well, not really.
John Evans, everybody.
Awful.
I apologize.
I meant like in general, you did good because you know just like Dancing with
the Stars the game
part of it is part of what
determines whether you come back or not but the other
part is me and the me
part is most of it.
So being gracious
and defeat does that go? Oh it's so great.
I'm loving it. Yeah. Yeah you're not
making excuses. Right. No.
Jeff?
I mean, it's just been such a long day.
I immediately started
making excuses. That was the bit. They all
missed it. Chad's right.
I actually thought there was a movie called The Long Day
that I had never
heard of again.
The King of New York.
The King of the New Yorker.
Charlotte's a web.
Yeah, she's the voice of something.
Charlotte, I guess. Charlotte the spider. Or no, the voice of something. Charlotte, I guess.
Charlotte the spider.
Or no, the pig is Charlotte.
But she's the spider.
Chad.
I don't know who plays the panda in that.
I'm going to go with the machinist.
Yeah!
I thought you were going to accidentally say it
when you were lifting off all those the titles before. I'm going to go with the machinist. Yeah! I thought you were going to accidentally say it when you were lifting off all those the titles before.
I was going to go the mechanicist.
That's huge, Jeff.
He's the most mechanic.
True romance.
Oh.
Um.
Oh, fuck.
I can't think of the
guy's name now. Oh. Oh, fuck. I can't think of the guy's name now. Oh, fuck, I can't think of that one either.
Holy shit.
Your brain works fast.
Wow.
You ever seen a guy's brain literally shut down in front of you?
Because the look in his eyes was a terror.
I just hate that I can't think of either of these titles.
Oh, fuck it.
We're almost out of time anyway, so I'm going to dip.
It's just between Chad now and Jeff.
Okay.
I'm going to go with So I Married an Axe Murderer.
Yes.
Wow, you said that just in the nick of time.
Nick of time.
God, he's so good.
He knows all the movies and makes them work with what he's saying.
Take, take, take.
I am going to go.
There has to be a Wayne's World 2.
Yeah, that's what he opened with.
Yeah, that was his opener.
That's what gave you the idea to say Wayne's World.
Christopher Walken's in it. Yeah, he did like, that's what gave you the idea to say Wayne's World. Christopher Walken's in it.
Yeah, he did a tricky one.
All right, I'm going to need to go to Steven.
Steven.
Seven Psychopaths.
Seven Psychopaths.
Yes, he's one of the psychopaths.
Jeff.
You said a Christopher Walken one.
I hate you.
So smart.
Does my lifeline have anything? kill the irishman i feel like
that's just something they say around here it can be both it can be both doug would you like
to withdraw that sir okay so jeff just got another one with the kill the Irishman. So, Chad, do you have one more?
Because we're completely out of time.
And I'm out of answers.
Congratulations, Jeff.
Jeff, you did it!
Woo!
Come on up and get your stuff, Mike.
Congratulations, Mike Turlip.
Okay, he's going to come up someday.
Don't forget that cola, the King Kong cola.
Please don't drink it in here.
We have rules.
Let's hear it for everybody and get some plugs going.
You can't come see Chad tonight because it's sold out.
They probably have a standby line, though.
I'm sure.
People want to go for it.
And what else you got to plug, Chad?
I have Fargo, North Dakota on the 16th.
And then the Tuesday after after that des moines wednesday
is omaha then kansas city and oklahoma city and dallas all that week very good killing it going
all over didn't you where'd you just come from like uh i was in san diego and brea before oh
yeah brea sold out brea i don't know that seats like 800 like 800 people. Well, it was nice. People came out. Yeah, they did.
Middle of somewhere.
Middle of somewhere.
Yeah, that's like a podcast.
Middle of somewhere.
Oh, okay.
Now people are reminding you of your things to plug?
I always have a lifeline for plugs.
You know that.
He spent 90 minutes proving he can't remember anything.
We are done.
John Evans.
Let's see.
I'm going to Springfield, Illinois, a place called Donny B's,
going to Crackers in Indianapolis.
You're just saying places you're going to visit?
No, no.
You're going to do shows there?
Donny B's house.
Okay, cool.
Yeah, these are clubs.
And a thrift store guy, Twitter.
I also have a vintage store called Funky Junk Vintage in Pittsburgh.
So you can buy stuff online when I get the website.
Yeah, I've been on the road with John
and had to go to the thrift stores.
That's probably why we stopped going on the road together.
Jeff Tate.
I got a podcast with my brother called Alter Tates.
Chad and I are doing a show together in Madison.
Did we plug that?
The day before Thanksgiving?
Oh, dude.
And Trey Gallion and I got a bunch of shows
in Atlanta, Asheville,
Knoxville,
Chattanooga.
It was alphabetical for a second there.
It still is. Thanks a lot. That's all my time.
Doug Loves Movies
is back at the Neptune Theater in Seattle
on Monday, December 16th.
And for all my other dates, go to douglasmovies.com.
That's douglasmovies.com!
Yeah!
Yeah!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!! Go! Go! Go!! Go! Go! Go! I'm a good man, a nice, a nice, a nice, a You guys are awesome. Thank you for coming out this afternoon. Thank you to Wise Guys. Always love coming to Wise Guys.
And one more time for all my guests,
Chad Daniels, John Evans, and Jeff Tate.
As always, positive energy.
Thanks again to Watchmen.
Can't get enough of HBO's Watchmen?
Now you can go deeper inside the critically acclaimed new series with the official Watchmen podcast.
Hosted by Watchmen executive producer and writer Damon Lindelof and Craig Mazin, the creator of Chernobyl.
The new podcast explores narrative choices, uncovers Easter eggs, and examines the show's connection to the groundbreaking
graphic novel.
Stream Watchmen now and catch
new episodes Sundays at 9pm
only on HBO.
Bye-bye.
Now it's time for Doug to watch another
talkie. Eyes of gold, his
viewing prowess makes him cocky.
There's no room in his heart for you.
Cause Doug loves movies.