Doug Loves Movies - Chris Evans, Leonard Maltin, and Adam Scott Guest
Episode Date: September 20, 2012Doug welcomes film critic Leonard Maltin and actors Chris Evans and Adam Scott to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/p...rivacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Hey everybody.
Hi Doug.
My name...
You don't have to say anything out loud ever.
That smells like someone who also might yell out answers later.
I got to warn him right now.
There's no reason to ever yell out.
Unless...
Actually, I take that back.
If I ask, hey, did you guys...
If I ask the audience, then please.
Jump right in.
My name is Doug. I love movies.
This is Doug Loves Movies.
Coming to you from the UCB Theater in Los Angeles
on Tuesday, September 18th, 2 Oceans 12.
That's right.
Woo!
Since last I spoke and you listened,
I saw Ruby Sparks
which is a movie, not a person
but it's a movie
about a person and her name is Ruby Sparks
and it was not as fun
as I thought it would be going in
but I thought it was worth seeing nonetheless
it was a good experience
but not as much fun as I
hoped and I saw
The Master,
which I could pretty much give that the same exact review.
That it's not... I didn't enjoy it, but I appreciated it.
Do you know that feeling?
Yeah, that's when you talk.
That's when you jump in.
When I need you.
But thank you for coming.
And from the corrections department, I forgot to give a shout-out in when I need you. But thank you for coming.
From the corrections department, I forgot to give a shout out to the company that made
the vinyl Douglas Movies doll that I
gave out at the Kansas City Improv
Show. It's
Iamartworks.com. So go there
and see whatever it is they're doing there. I have no
idea. I
want those of you
who have been waiting for the Tournament of Championship finals or the
Garland-Miller-Holmes rematch or the return of Go-Go Lithgow to know that I am tirelessly working
to make all of those things happen and everyone involved has promised to allow it to happen when their schedules permit.
And tonight we have another schedules permitting situation
because these are three very busy guests
that brought things like an extra, extra large T-shirt
that says Wasp, the Wasp Woman on it
from an old-timey movie about a wasp with a woman's face on it.
We've also got a Douglas
Movies shirt. Got one of those in there
again, yeah. And we've got
my
double CD Smug Life.
And then we have
a motion picture
called Captain America.
And
a book written
by Mr.
Leonard Maltin. Please welcome
Leonard Maltin, Chris
Evans, and Adam Scott.
Here they are.
Oh, we should have told you about the door.
The door is bad news.
Hello.
Shit, I forgot my gifts.
Oh, you weren't able to...
I just got them at Amoeba and brought them with me
and then forgot them in the car.
What are they?
VHS copies of...
of Cops and Robbersons
and The Last Boy Scout.
Oh, okay, well.
The Last Boy Scout is awesome.
Since you threw Last Boy Scout in there,
you're going to have to go get those afterwards
and work it out with whoever the winner is.
Just put real effort into those choices.
I admire that.
Those are great choices.
And that first voice was Adam Scott,
and the second voice was Leonard Moulton.
And Captain America is the politest member of the panel.
Hello, hello, hello.
And so we'll start with Chris Evans.
Chris Evans met you, asked you to do the podcast.
You immediately said yes.
It was very easy.
Yeah, well, I think I was pretty drunk at the time.
And I got really competitive.
And I was like, I'll destroy this game.
And then I listened to some of the podcasts.
And I was like, I might suck at this game.
But you stayed committed to appearing.
But that was probably, what, six or seven years ago
when we ran into each other.
I was like, next Tuesday.
And then I was like, oh, I can't do it.
Next Tuesday.
And it's been about a year.
You were shooting major motion pictures in all points unknown.
And then also, on your time off, you like to go back home.
You're an East Coast guy.
Yeah, I've been in Boston.
I literally just got back yesterday.
East Coast.
No, I was tracking it to the day when I knew you were going to be back.
I said, can you do it on this day?
Yeah, without fail.
I'll fall out of complete touch with you
on like a Monday.
You'll be like, what are you doing tomorrow?
Yeah, you can't plan too far ahead
with these characters, Leonard.
Leonard Moulton picks a date.
It's going to happen.
He doesn't leave his shit in the car.
That's how dull I am. picks a date, it's going to happen. He doesn't leave his shit in the car.
That's how dull I am.
Although I was told, I was warned not to listen to a recent episode.
I usually hear your shows.
I download your podcast.
But I was warned of a
recent episode that I should not listen to.
I forget which one it was. Maybe Jordan knows.
What's the one where we got really filthy
about Leonard Maltin?
Yeah.
Like NC-17 discussion
of Leonard Maltin and his sexual antics.
Yeah.
Now you're going to probably check it out.
No.
You've convinced me. You've closed
the deal. Okay. Well, nobody
seems to remember it, so it must not be that bad.
Well, I hope not.
Did you like Ruby Sparks?
Always offensive.
I did like it.
Yeah.
I thought it was going to be more fun, though.
They kind of pitched it like it was going to be
a little bit more whimsical
and a little less, you know,
screaming and crying.
You know, when you make up a woman,
when you write a woman character and then she comes to life, there's no screaming and crying.
Except that the character was written by the woman.
Right.
And it's about male fantasizing of women. It's not a male point of view. Zoe Kazan wrote
this screenplay for herself and her real-life boyfriend,
Paul Dano.
It's very interesting knowing that
when you digest the film.
Is Adam Scott in that one?
No.
He's in most things now.
Most things have Adam Scott in it.
Hair up, hair down, he'll do it all.
Or hair on the inside of my body.
I'll do those, too.
Wait!
I don't know what that means.
I don't know either.
Leonard, did you enjoy Ruby Sparks?
I did.
You liked it?
I haven't seen it.
I really want to see it.
Yeah, it's good.
It's good.
It's no The Master,
which you could say about every other film ever made.
Because that movie is unique.
I saw all of The Master except the last 40 minutes because I had to leave.
Because you were watching The Master?
Because I was going to be late for the next showing of The Master.
When you like a part of a movie, you just sort of cling to that.
I got to see that beginning again.
At what point did you leave, Adam?
I left, spoiler alert, right when...
No, don't do that.
No, it was nothing.
It was right when she said, we're going to go to this place.
That's my least favorite thing about the movie.
The dialogue's terrible.
We're going to go to this place after that one thing that happened.
She says, okay, I don't think I'll be spoiling anything.
Did a lot of people see it already?
Nobody's seen it yet.
Oh, well.
Except for those people.
But I mean, it's only playing in New York and L.A. at this point.
Well, those are the only two places that matter.
Okay.
Then that's fair.
And Boston.
Right when she said,
we're going to leave this house and we're going to this place
and this book is going to come out.
Okay.
Yeah, I got it.
So there's like another 40 minutes, right?
Yeah.
So it was a drag.
You left because there was an emergency or something?
No, I just had,
I was going to be late for work
so I had to leave.
But so you were that amped
about seeing it
that you thought,
I'll just take my chances
and watch some of it?
No.
I went.
They paged you?
No, I bought a ticket
but if you're 10 minutes late at the fucking arc light,
they don't let you into the movie.
Sure.
So I had to get a ticket for the next showing.
And this is exciting stuff.
This is like a movie in itself.
And then go see the next showing,
which was going to make me...
I wasn't going to be able to see all of it,
but I was there, so I wanted to I wanted you know what I'll write it
down yeah I have a prediction about the master I have a prediction that this is
gonna be this year's movie every fall season when the the heavy-duty stuff
comes out and the Oscar type films come out there's at least one usually one in
particular that critics do handsprings over particular, that critics do handsprings over,
or some critics do handsprings over, and builds a reputation, but real people don't like it.
And they feel intimidated because they've been sort of bullied into believing they ought to like
it. And what trickles down to me is people will stop me sometimes
in a lobby of a theater or a hotel or an airport,
and they'll look at me, they'll give me kind of a fisheye look and say,
did you like The Master?
Daring me to say yes.
And if I say yes, then they're really ticked off.
And if I don't, and I say, no, I didn't swallow that Kool-Aid. Oh, okay, good, alright, fine.
It's a challenging movie, to be sure, but the reason I'm glad I saw it
is because it will be fun to talk about for a
long time to come, because there's a lot of peculiar things in that movie that
I'm curious about. I think there's a lot of great things in that movie.
Yeah, and Philip Seymour Hoffman
and Joaquin Phoenix are both...
Yeah.
Like, you imagine if other actors
had played those roles,
then the movie would have been a real yawn.
But they are so mesmerizing...
They're fantastic.
...that they save what is kind of a trudge.
Is that the right word for it?
Yeah.
But I'm excited to see...
I thought it was really good. I mean, I didn I'm excited to see it. I thought it was really good.
I mean, I didn't see all of it, but I thought it was...
You don't seem too upset about missing out on the last 40 minutes.
That's because I'm going to go see it.
I loved what I saw.
So you're really curious what's going to happen to those characters?
Yeah.
Fair enough. Chris, you haven't seen it.
So you're off the hook.
What do you think, man?
I haven't seen it.
Years ago, New York Magazine used to do
these word game competitions every week.
And one of my all-time favorites
was to invent a TV show
concept and the TV Guide logline
for the show.
And one of the finalists was a show
called I Heard That Was Good. And the log line was, celebrities discuss books they haven't
read and movies they haven't seen.
That's a million dollar idea.
That's a great, great idea.
Well, that's essentially what happens on this show every week. Everyone's either too busy with their careers or their families or both.
Adam's juggling both and doing quite a bit of stuff.
But I wanted to mention, I don't know if it's in this new 2013 Leonard Maltin movie guide,
but if you want to go old school instead of having the app on the phone like I do,
if you want to go old school instead of having the app on the phone like I do,
you are a fan of Adam and his work in Friends with Kids.
Oh, yeah.
I like Friends with Kids very much.
An underappreciated movie in my book.
Thank you.
Very good movie. And also of the Ruby Sparks variety of marketing it,
they had to sell it as a comedy,
but when you watch it, it's not totally a comedy.
Not funny at all.
First of all, use your microphone.
Really?
It's so small.
It's a podcast.
I know Johnny...
I know your Fantastic Four
persona would
eschew microphones, and of course Captain America would not even know what a microphone is. I know your Fantastic Four persona is due microphones
and of course Captain America
would not even know what a microphone is.
I'm from another time, but I catch on quickly.
You grasp a lot of shit
real fast.
All the superheroes do, there's just a lot of
very intuitive, like, well, if if we do this that's gonna work
Yeah the learning curve is quick
What's going on get it closer to me
Here you go we'll try to give you a little more
Alright
Holy shit he just figured it out
Move your foot
That's called problem solving
Talk about superhero
My god
Is the expression
what's the play, is that
from the time
Captain America came from?
Yeah, he was like, what's our play?
What's our play going to be? Do I say that in the movie?
Yeah, yeah.
Are you familiar with the word Tesseract?
Wait a minute. Because
I think that should be a drinking game. I think you should watch Avengers and have to do a shot every time they say Tesseract? Really, man? Because I think that should be a drinking game.
I think you should watch Avengers and have to do a shot every time they say Tesseract.
Yeah, they say that shit a lot.
I still don't know what a Tesseract is.
Wait, do I say what's the play in Avengers or Captain America?
In the Avengers.
Do I?
I just saw it a couple days ago and one audience member is nodding yes.
I don't remember you saying that either, man. In that movie. I don't know. I don't remember you saying that either, man.
In that movie.
I don't know. I don't remember.
You saved his ass.
I'm also a big fan of What's Your Number?
Don't say that.
No, but I'm saying it.
Does it make the book? Is it in the book?
Yeah, of course it's in the book.
Let's see what the book says about it.
No, I like that movie, and I like you in it a lot.
And I've never seen you. I think you've got great comedy that movie and I like you in it a lot. And I'd never seen you...
I think you got great comedy chops
and I thought it was fun to watch.
Okay.
Take that.
Thank you, thank you.
You sound like my mother.
Just one man's opinion.
Oh, I shouldn't say this.
People are... I really enjoyed't say this. People are...
I really enjoyed making that movie.
Don't...
Don't skulk, as you say it.
Troy, see, that skulk was for the people who couldn't see,
and you ruined me.
Smart, bawdy, briskly funny comedy
charged by Ferris and Evans comedic, savvy,
and likability.
I think that's exactly what
my mom said.
Unrated version runs 117
minutes. Thank you, Leonard.
And now you know.
Now you know.
Gotta know that. And why do we have two of these out here,
but one of them looks smaller?
This is for me.
It comes out in two handy sizes.
One is smaller than the other.
This is not handy.
In the back pocket.
And one is cheaper than the other.
And one is kinder for people
whose eyesight is starting to fade.
Oh, yeah, this one.
I think I would have trouble with this one.
Oh, shit.
I have enough trouble with the app, so I'm staying away from the books.
The app will be updated soon.
The app isn't synced yet with the 2013, but it will be soon.
All right.
So maybe for the first time, we'll have like this will be like second prize gets this.
We can do that.
Yeah.
And it gets the smaller one, but the winner gets the big one.
Whatever you say.
That's the one.
You're the ringmaster.
All right.
That's what we're going to do.
Chris, in the final scene.
Wait a second.
Wait a second.
Wait a second.
Yes, sir.
How are we delegating which book goes to which prize?
Can you go over it one more time?
Sorry, me.
I love that.
Not only did you do that,
then you did it slowly.
That was really...
Because by the time I started doing it,
I forgot what I was going to do.
I just want to ask Chris Evans,
for everyone who sat around
and watched the final scene
in The Avengers,
the final, final scene, after the end credits, when you're eating,
and I don't care if this is a spoiler at this point,
when you're in the shawarma restaurant, right?
Yeah.
Where does, I can't see Captain America's shield anywhere.
Does he have a special locker or
does he just lock it up in his apartment
when he goes out to eat with the rest of the Avengers
in their costumes? I'll do you one
better. You also can't see his fucking face
because... That's not you!
It's me!
I was in
I was doing a thing in Prague where I had a
full beard and they were like shave your beard and
go back to Prague and just lay a fake beard in and I was like I'm not gonna do in Prague where I had a full beard and they were like, shave your beard and go back to Prague
and just lay a fake beard in.
I was like,
I'm not going to do that.
And I said,
just CGI it out.
Just CGI it out.
I have to start working
this movie in like a day
and I'm not going to
shave the beard.
So instead,
we did a prosthetic,
a facial prosthetic.
I want to put this down,
but I won't.
They had a facial prosthetic
that went under my eyes
and around my whole face.
It looked like I got
attacked by a hive of bees.
I came to set and I was like,
is this what we're...
It went into my lips.
And everyone's
eating and drinking in the scene.
I can't eat or drink.
And it looked
so awful.
Joss was like,
well, you just gotta do this.
And that's what I do
in this scene.
That's what you do.
That is so weird.
I should describe you just,
for the listeners,
you should describe that action.
Put his hand in his hair.
Charlie Brown.
Charlie Brown style.
So just put your head on the table
the most clever way to
mask the majority of your ridiculous
face
as a result of a horrible prosthetic
low key in that scene
low key
but uh
did you have that
were you ready for that I think you had that? Were you ready for that?
What?
I think you had that.
No, those things just happen.
Yeah, all I have is the where's your shield,
because I was really concerned,
because I was looking for it this time.
Not where's your face.
I wasn't paying any attention to his face.
I just thought the shield should be right there or something.
It's nowhere. Because a guy came in, his face. I just thought the shield should be right there or something. It's nowhere.
Because a guy came in, his name tag last week was Shield.
Or maybe two weeks ago, but recently.
Last week, right?
It was a guy who had a whole Captain America shield.
And he was off by one week.
Because he's not back, is he?
Ha ha, fucking idiot.
Timing. he missed his chance
he missed his big chance
timing is everything
yeah it really
truly is
and that's why
it's time to say
does anyone hunger for games
now of course, Adam is one of the better players of this game.
I hate to break it to you.
Do you want to just sit there with your head in your hands?
I've never made it to the crazy round or whatever.
Like, I've never gotten past...
That's what it's called, super crazy round.
Bro, it's gonna get crazy.
But, you know, I've never made it past here.
I think you got into one tournament of championships.
There's a tournament of championships.
There's a second location tonight.
Yeah.
No, never go to a second location with a hippie.
But, uh...
Alec Baldwin, 30 Rock.
So... go to a second location with a hippie. Alec Baldwin, 30 Rock. Leonard, are you familiar with
a new game we've been playing called
How Much Did This Shit Make?
No. Oh, it's exciting.
Can't wait to tell you about it.
How Much Did This Shit Make
is
basically I take a movie that, you know,
some people may not appreciate that much.
And I always try to theme it or tie it into, you know,
who the guests are or something like that.
And I'm pretty sure neither of these fellas was in this movie.
But I looked at the top movies,
the top box office earners of all time, domestically,
and
the highest rated, or lowest
rated, however you want to come at it,
but the movie that you gave
bomb to, it
took until the 235th
highest ranking movie
of all time is the first one you designated
a bomb. Everything above
that, movies 2, 34 through 1,
you give one star, one and a half, two,
you know, all over the map.
But the first bomb that comes up,
you want to guess what it is?
I'll never get this.
Can you tell us how much it is?
Your first bomb.
No, because that's what we're going to play,
is you guys are going to guess how much it made.
But the first one that you called a bomb,
that's the 235th
highest ranking movie
This is a lost cause before it begins.
is Little Fockers.
Oh, wow.
Big hit in spite
of your bomb designation.
Yes, and I have no question
or no qualms about that. That's fine.
I'm sorry for the people who
spent that money, but hey, that's, you know.
So now, Price is Right style.
Yeah.
Everyone's going to guess how many millions
they thought it made without going over.
Okay.
And someone can pull the fast one of saying,
I'd like to bid $1 if they want to be that person.
So if you go over, you automatically lose.
It will not, yeah, you can't win if you go over.
This is domestic theatrical box office, right?
Mm-hmm.
Okay.
According to Box Office Mojo
and my limited skills at taking down information.
I want to see you taking Mr. Moulton's ratings
and getting on Box Office Mojo
and figuring out how he rated each of the 234.
It's so arduous you have to be high.
I would imagine.
Like, you have to be so fucking stoned.
Yeah, and it's fun.
And next time you do that for like 236 to 500,
can you call me?
That sounds fun to me.
I'll do it.
I'll seek them all out.
There might be one that ranked higher that I missed.
I had some ideas.
I thought you might have given Bomb to one of the Transformers movies.
It was tempting.
Or the third Pirates of the Caribbean.
Yeah. You know, there was
a few big hits. What's your number
again? Yeah.
I think three stars. Three, I think.
Flushing your credibility.
He's pretty stingy.
Sometimes, if you believe
in something, you swim against the tide.
What could I say?
What is the four-star movie, Mr. Malton, that you gave four stars to
that got the most negative feedback, like people do not agree that it's a four-star movie?
Those are not the ones they hassle me about.
Ever?
Ever.
That's rare.
It's rare to get bad feedback about a four-star review.
Because we give so few of them.
We're really stingy.
We're really stingy.
Maybe one a year.
Maybe two in an extraordinary year.
Yeah, you're the Scrooge of movie star giving.
Yes, thank you.
I wear that mantle proudly.
Thank you very much.
And so what's the time when you call something a bomb?
Or like, did you, something a bomb, or like,
did you, I'm sure, have teenage girls confronted you about your Twilight reviews?
No, they can't find
me, so, which is
just the way I like it. You do blend into the trees.
Like a
wolf
that hates vampires.
Alright, so we have to play this game.
So, how many dollars do you think, millions do you think it made? that hates vampires. All right, so we have to play this game. Okay.
All right.
So how many dollars do you think,
millions do you think it made, Leonard?
Who goes first, me?
You can go first.
I'll say, I'll start the bidding at 100 million.
Okay.
I'll say 90.
I'll say 135 million.
I don't think it broke 100.
I think it did.
Dang, 250 down?
Use your microphone.
Sorry.
I think we can still hear you even when you hold it down there.
But Adam Scott is our winner
because the actual total
is higher than $135 million.
It's $148 million.
Little fuckers.
Yeah.
Fool me once, fool me twice.
Go ahead, fool me again.
He bid 90, I bid 100.
Adam went the highest.
I went 135.
He said 135.
I'm trying to pull that shit at me.
I like your contentious spirit.
I like that.
Thank you.
That means you're really ready
to go after these guys
in the Leonard Maltin game.
Leonard Maltin.
This is
a bit of a dream of mine.
Doug?
Fever dream?
I am playing the Leonard Maltin game
with Leonard Maltin
and Captain America.
But I've already acknowledged that you are a better player than I am.
It's been a while.
It's a fact.
I think it'll be a fun competition.
I can't wait to dive in.
Let's just talk about it and not do it.
It's happened, Jeff Garlin.
Gentlemen, these are the name tags
that these people went to the trouble of making.
Oh, what's happening?
Oh, this is so interactive.
Oh, what's happening?
Come on, Captain America, pull it together.
Figure this out quickly.
What's the play?
You pick the name tag that you would like to play for.
Tesseract.
Is the beer guy around? Can we get another beer?
Yeah, we can get you another beer.
Let's get another beer out here for the captain.
Wait, how do we do this? What's happening?
You stand up and go out into the audience and pick a name tag that you would like to play for.
Hopefully we have another beer flying in.
Just whatever name tag you like.
Does anybody have an Avengers themed name tag?
Or something that would appeal
to somebody with limited...
Oh, there you go. Limited.
I don't know what I was going to say.
Yeah, take it from him. Or her. I'm sorry.
Sorry, ma'am.
Oh, and now he's dropping it on people?
This is the clumsiest superhero I've ever met.
Alright, don't read the thing on the back.
That's the shithead for at the end.
Don't read it out loud, yeah.
Yeah, how does this work? What am I supposed to be doing?
Just don't look at the back and say it out loud.
But show everybody what
the name tag is.
Just don't read it out loud. How hard is that?
Are you...
I thought I wasn't supposed to know it.
So I can know it.
Okay.
Use your microphone voice.
Okay.
And there's another beer for you.
I don't know if that's a good idea.
All right, Adam.
Who are you playing for?
I'm playing for Brian Harns.
Harris.
Harris.
Brian Harris.
And his sign is totally weird.
There's a picture of him and then also some fruit snacks.
Did you pick it because of the fruit snacks?
Yes.
I think this is a drive-on for somewhere.
A drive-on pass.
All right.
To LA Studios?
And I believe it's all connected to some sort of coffin for an animal.
I hope.
All right.
Well, thank you for bringing that, Harris.
Bye.
I'm going to call him by his last name.
And what do you have there?
I have Milhouse.
Chris Evans is going to play for...
Does this mean I'm playing for Jessica?
She wrote Jessica on it, yeah.
I'm playing for Jessica.
There you go.
Do you hang out with Ryan Lochte at all?
Are you insulting my...
No.
I'm just saying you both have the same vibe,
the laid back.
Moronic.
No, no.
I would never say that. I don't really know.
Limited vocabulary.
And Leonard
is playing for, I assume, her name is Katie.
Yes. And she made a change
to Kiss Me Kate.
To Kiss Me Goodbye Katie.
Kiss Me Goodbye Katie.
With a rendering of the spanking scene from Kiss Me Kate, Kiss Me Goodbye Katie. Kiss Me Goodbye Katie. With a rendering of the spanking scene
from Kiss Me Kate, the old musical.
Oh, I thought it was from Secretary.
I have fun.
All right, so we've got Katie.
Leonard's playing for Katie.
Adam's playing for Harris somebody.
And Chris is playing for Jessica Milhouse.
Nixon.
And Adam's
going to take off.
He's going to
probably go out to the valet,
get him to bring the car around, get the prizes
out of the thing, come back
in, then we'll start the game.
So how is Swarma?
Is it good?
He really just walked off the fucking stage. Is that allowed? in then we'll start the game so how is shawarma is it good yeah you can get
away with a lot on this show but he had a nice sigh he's got a beverage you
can't get in New York City anymore I'm no matter who you bet I'm sponsored by
Chipotle so I bring this out sorry guys we delicious. For like $6.99, you can get a chicken burrito.
I'll tell you later.
All organic ingredients. It's like a farm
crash. Sorry, Doug.
You get to go first, Adam, because you
won the
How Much Did This Shit Make game.
And so you get to pick between
three categories.
Would you like... At MST3Kdork on Twitter suggested Sad Max,
and that's movies where Mel Gibson's wife is dead.
Or at Rowan Lane, R-O-W-A-N,
like Rowan and Martin and Lane, as in Diane Lane,
suggested songs about rambos,
and that's movies where Sylvester Stallone sings.
And crab stickles,
I'm not even going to spell that one,
in front of Mr. Maltin,
suggested triple nipple.
And that's movies where
one of the characters has three nipples.
Yeah, you're giving me
that that's never happened look,
but I thought of two.
And one is a remake of the other.
Oh, she did.
Okay, I thought of three.
All three of these categories are so specific.
Yeah, people have really gotten into these specific categories.
It's really fun when you think you know the answer.
Okay, I'll go sad.
Based just on the category.
I'll go sad, Max.
Yeah, so you're already thinking about it.
This particular one is
from 2002.
And we'll go
to Leonard next after
we'll go around that way.
This is always freaky to me.
Someone in this room gave it
two and a half stars.
This person claims that it's from 2002.
I have no way to disagree.
I can't look it up on IMDb right now.
And he also said about this movie
that it's downright silly at times.
And he says the writer-director of the film
played Ray,
a character named Ray,
and there are six names listed.
How many names do you think you can get it in, Adam?
Scott.
Fuck.
Six names?
Do you have a microphone?
Sorry.
What year was it?
What year was it?
2002.
That long silence.
I thought you were looking to see if I was married.
I was checking that out.
I've heard stories.
This was 2002?
Mm-hmm.
So how many names, Adam?
Three.
Three, he says.
So he just needs three names, Leonard.
Do you want to, do you think you can get it in less
or do you have to challenge him?
Name that movie, Adam. Alright, Adam.
Your three names
are Patricia Calimber,
Abigail Breslin,
and Rory Culkin.
Culkin, somebody just said.
I've never heard somebody excitedly whisper Culkin, somebody just said. I've never heard somebody excitedly whisper Culkin.
I would, though, because I like those.
All the Culkins are good.
Not to confuse you with other Culkins.
Laurie Culkin.
I think Mr. Moulton's about to get a point.
Oh, signs.
You son of a bitch.
That's like slow rolling in poker.
It's like you knew it all along.
Well played.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, wow, you look angry.
He is pissed.
I'm not angry at him, I'm angry at me.
I couldn't think of what film it was.
But you had ideas, right?
No, you only need one idea.
Which is the name of the movie.
Could you name any movies
where Mel Gibson's wife is dead?
What's the man without a face?
Yeah, why would your wife dies as soon as she finds out's the man without a face? Yeah, why would
your wife dies as soon as she finds out
you don't have a face?
That was the first one that came
into my head.
He's played a lot of weird letters.
Lethal Weapon, Braveheart.
Was she dead?
She wasn't dead and we were soldiers.
She was alive. That was heartbreaking.
He had to leave her.
Very sad.
If his wife didn't die in Braveheart,
there'd be no rest of the movie.
Because that's what spurs him into action.
Yeah, when your wife dies,
paint your face blue and go nuts.
Jesus, come on.
His wife is dead in The Gringo, too.
Brand new movie.
I haven't seen that one.
No, I don't know if she's dead.
She's probably dead in that, what was that one about innocence?
Or, you know, where he's a vigilante.
I don't think he ever has a living wife.
I saw that.
Yeah, he compared scars with Rene Russo.
Is Mad Max married?
I don't remember.
Mad Max probably lost his family.
Oh, for sure.
Yeah.
Mad Max lost a whole continent.
Yeah.
Probably.
That shit was cray.
All right, you ready, Chris Evans?
Yes.
Your time to step up and play the game,
picking a category between these three,
and then next in line will be Leonard. We'll go back
around the other way.
At Below Zilch suggested
Doug loves guests and this
is movies that feature
one of the guests that's on the show right now.
All three of you are eligible.
Or James
Gandolfini celebrating a birthday today.
Fantastic actor. So the films of James Gandolfini Celebrating a birthday today Fantastic actor
So the films of James Gandolfini
Or
In theaters, ciao
That's films that take place in Italy
I'll do James Gandolfini
Okay
Definitely avoiding the opportunity
To know one of his own films
Probably a smart play deftly avoiding the opportunity to know one of his own films.
Probably a smart play.
Okay, someone complained to me on Twitter that I haven't been saying lately
whether I agree or disagree with how many stars you give it.
So let me just say...
Because one person complained on Twitter?
Wait a minute.
That's all it takes.
That's all it takes.
Yeah, yeah.
You like to please the customers.
Yeah, but it also reminded me,
like, oh, that was fun
when I used to do that.
I don't know why I stopped doing that.
Okay.
Especially now that you're sitting here.
Yeah.
I can say it to your face.
Sure.
Say it to your smiling face.
Until I turn my back on you.
And you don't have Sam Levine
here to protect you this time.
He's in Philadelphia
doing a TV series.
Yeah, I heard that.
Good for him.
Excited about it.
Two and a half stars
you gave this movie.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-mm, mm-mm.
Okay.
I am not having that.
All right.
This is four star movie
in my book.
Okay.
Okay, three and a half.
You talked me down.
Your winning ways talked me down
If we keep going
We may get right up close
I don't know what that means
We're only one star apart now
Oh, I see
Two and a half stars, you gave it
The year is
1983
Fuck The year is 1983.
Fuck.
Oh, yeah.
It's a young Gandolfini.
Please swear into the microphone.
Mr. Moulton says about this movie that it's highly stylized.
I should say specifically the violence is highly stylized.
I don't want to take you too far out of context,
which I do on occasion for fun.
And he also says it has colorful, supporting characters.
And he lists a shitload of names.
Twelve names.
Thirteen names.
Let's go with thirteen.
How many can you get it in?
I need all of those.
What's your number?
I need all of those.
Again, didn't think of that beforehand.
Yeah, I need all all those names, dude.
I got nothing.
Okay, so 13 is his opening bid.
Shit!
That's all right.
I'm like boozing games when I'm drunk.
So you'll probably want to go 12 or less,
whatever you feel comfortable with.
I'll say 11.
11's a good bid.
Adam?
I'll go 7
7
Is Parks and Rec already back?
On Thursday
Night
So yeah
So if you missed it last night
This is going to come out on Friday
So if you missed it last night
Go to your DVR, your On Demand
And then watch that And then watch again next Thursday on Friday. Yeah, so if you missed it last night, go to your whatever, your DVR, your On Demand or whatever,
and then watch that and then watch again
next Thursday.
Yeah, 9.30.
Do you guys get preempted
by the SNL campaign stuff?
I think that'll be on at 8,
the SNL election coverage.
So up all night
is sitting it out
or something?
It's SNL election,
then 30 Rock, and then The Office, and then us.
Nice.
Good answer.
Usually people don't know that kind of stuff.
Or maybe it's up all night at 8.30.
I don't know.
I think it's 30 Rock.
Oh, shit.
All right.
We'll fix it in post.
We'll put a fake beard on you Chris
It's to you now
Six names
Adam says
You can either ask him to name it
Or you can bid lower
He said seven?
Seven names
Thank you audience
Another time when you can do that.
What's that?
Bitch.
Whoa. Okay.
I've had like nine of these.
I understand.
You've had nine Milhouse masks?
Okay, so
you get seven names.
And here they are.
Samuel L. Jackson,
Tom Sizemore,
Christopher Penn.
Wait, you said 1983.
I think you meant 93.
You're right.
Okay, so...
That's fucking huge!
I told you,
the number 83 and 93
is hard to distinguish.
That's enormous.
That's enormous.
What, he figured it out?
Yeah, he obviously knows it.
I would have bid zero names.
If you had said 93, I would have bid zero names.
Well, you get seven names, and here they are.
Wow, this is so fucking bullshit.
So just name it.
True romance.
So yeah, so he got to stomp you a little less than he would have if I said the right...
This is some horse shit.
You still...
I was anticipating either true romance...
It's funny, I said a really young James Gandolfini.
I was like, wow, he's like...
Really young, yeah.
19.
19 millimeter.
Come on, dude.
I had a couple locked and loaded.
Did you say eight millimeter?
Well, yeah. That's a really good poll for Gandolfini. Right? Sure. I had a couple locked and loaded. Did you say 8mm? Well, yeah.
That's a really good poll for Gandolfini.
Right?
Sure.
I felt confident.
You fucked me, dude.
You could have gone a simple action.
I didn't know.
It would be another one.
I didn't know.
I didn't think you'd go there.
I figured it's going to be one of the good ones.
The Mexican.
All right, settle down. Settle down. We's going to be one of the good ones. The Mexican. Settle down.
We're going to play that whole point over again.
But Adam is still going to win.
It's a special occasion.
We can go a few minutes over.
Can we get another beer, beer man?
My friend Gabe is delivering beers. It's social drinking. but it's a special occasion so we can go a few minutes over. Can we get another beer, beer man?
Yep.
My friend Gabe is delivering beers.
This is just, you know, social drinking.
Now you know there's a 12 beer minimum because that's all we bought.
None of the rest of us are drinking.
I'm in sober September.
I'm on day 18.
Good work.
Yeah.
From pot, too?
No.
Are you crazy?
From the guy who's? A bottle of wine
This guy's sucking back a bottle of wine over there
Be cool, be cool, they don't have a thing
They don't have a thing
Be cool man
There's no thing
There's no thing
Come on, we've There's no thing. There's no thing.
Come on. We've got a no thing situation.
Okay, I'm going to give you three new categories.
Chris.
Same name.
That's a movie that
was also another
movie with the exact same name.
Okay.
I know. It's happened. It's weird.
There he is. There's his beverage.
Captain America
needs his go juice.
What's the play?
Glug, glug, what's the play?
Red team, go.
You should suggest that for the next one
because wouldn't he be excited
that Prohibition is over
when he came to the future?
Okay.
I hope Marvel hears all of this.
Yes.
Listen up, Marvel.
Maybe you could do the Batman reboot
in three years.
In theaters now,
that's movies that are playing in theaters now.
Or the Bjorn Legacy.
No one ever picks this. I don't know why.
It's movies that have ABBA songs in them.
Okay.
So do you want a movie that's in theaters now?
Are you aware of what's in theaters right now?
I only have two options.
Well, you don't want the ABBA one, do you?
No, but I thought there was a third one.
There was.
Same name.
Movie that has the exact same name.
Oh, same name, same name, same name.
I don't like the other two.
Okay.
What's the same name one?
I didn't really know, but I just figured I didn't like it.
The other two were just shitty.
It's a good choice.
This is a movie that there was a movie previous to this one with the exact same name, but they went ahead with it.
Like, let's just call it this also, even though there's a known entity.
Not a remake, but just the same name.
Just a different, completely different movie.
And this is the one that used the same name.
And two and a half stars from Mr. Malton.
And I probably agree with that. I might go
a shade lower. Maybe.
But there is something about this movie
that I love.
Leonard calls this movie frenetic,
and he also says
that...
He also says about it
that...
It's incredulous?
That it's a perfect vehicle for the star of the movie.
And what year would that movie be?
And that would be...
2005.
I'm really giving it a second look now.
It's not a six, it's a five.
2005.
And you listed 11 names.
What do you think, Chris? 2005. And you listed 11 names. What do you think, Chris?
2005.
Would you like another plate of shawarma?
I didn't get to eat shawarma, bro.
I know, but you were doing the same pose just now.
I just looked at it.
Wait, what are my options?
If there was a tree right there, you would hit your head against it.
What's the number?
How many things?
Five?
Eleven names.
Eleven names.
Yeah, you can bid all eleven if you want.
I'll take...
You're in a sweet spot.
Eight names.
We get to go first.
Eight names.
All right.
Ballsy move.
You like that?
Yeah, I did.
Just get ready.
Leonard?
It's going to get crazy.
I'll say seven names.
Okay. What a dick
I'll take five names
Prick
Hey
Make sure
Don't listen to this one
Leonard
There's a lot of offensive stuff in it
Adam
Yeah
Yeah
He said seven I said five. Adam? Yeah. Yeah.
He said seven.
I said five.
You did?
Yeah.
Chris, it's back to you.
No, I'm going to say Adam,
show what you got, bro.
All right,
so this is playing out
exactly as I thought it would.
The year is actually
1997.
Okay, it's 2005 and your five names,
Adam, are Laura
Keitlinger, Stephen
Anthony Lawrence.
That's three names.
No, that's a guy with three names.
That often happens in the Screen Actors Guild.
Oh, I'm getting a call.
Just because the two of you are lucky enough
to get your own two names.
What are your middle names,
if you had to go middle name in the SAG registry?
My middle name is Robert.
Is Robert?
Chris Robert Evans?
Christopher.
You should be an actor who goes by Robert Evans.
That would be super confusing.
That's my dad's name.
And Adam, what's your middle name?
Boy, I was cute.
Well, you really lucked out that you didn't have to,
that there wasn't another Adam Scott ahead of you.
Elliot Cho was in this movie.
Jeremy Bergman
and Josh Hutcherson.
Josh Hutcherson.
So he must have been Widow.
Because he, of course, is Peeta
in the Hunger Games.
It's funny when he throws bread around.
His name's
PETA.
I'm gonna need an answer,
Mr. Scott.
I don't know.
You have shit.
The actor that I think
is the reason
I think we both
think he's funny
is Will Ferrell
and the motion picture
is called
Kicking and Screaming
oh right
and there was a
Noah Baumbach movie
called Kicking and Screaming
which I actually
enjoy quite a bit
so Chris gets a point
Chris is on the board
show's going long.
Apologies to Comedy Bang Bang.
And let's finish this off here.
Let's make it happen.
You're winning.
You understand that.
No, you're tied for first.
It's first person to two points.
Adam has a point.
You have a point.
Here goes.
Who challenged who on that last thing?
Chris challenged me. Chris challenged you.
Okay, so we start with Leonard and go, uh,
towards Chris.
And, uh, you get to pick between
Yabba Dabba Don't,
that's a cartoon that was made into a live-action movie...
Oh.
Uh...
Oh, shit. that was made into a live-action movie.
Joseph Gordon Leave It.
That's movies where Joseph Gordon-Levitt leaves someone
or has someone leave him.
This one's so complicated,
I don't even want to say it,
but I'll say it anyway.
At Blake underscore Blount suggested Mother Lover,
and that's movies where
an actor and an actress
played mother and son in one film
and lovers in another.
Whoa.
Yeah, I'm going to tell you guys what that one is if it doesn't get picked.
Are there a lot of them or
just one? I just want to get rid of it.
I found an example.
I'm going to go for Yabba Dabba Don't.
Yabba Dabba Don't. Okay.
What was Yabba Dabba Don't? What does that mean?
It means
it's something you say when you're excited
about not doing something
yabba dabba dum
no it's cartoons
TV cartoons that were turned into
motion pictures with live action
and Flintstones
would be an obvious one
but I don't usually make it that obvious
god I have to pay so bad
and
Mother Lover
Just go, man.
What do you got?
Seven minutes left?
I can handle it.
Mother Lover
the films were for
88 and 94
because
Sally Field and Tom Hanks
were lovers in Punchline
and then
Mother and Son
of Forrest Gump.
That's right.
Yeah.
So we're finally
obliterating that
fucking category.
Get that shit out of my phone.
And now let's play
Yabba Dabba Don't.
Okay.
As selected by Mr. Malton
who gave this film
a generous two stars.
Yeah.
Something was up that day.
It was like your birthday
or some shit.
It's fun to be able to say this right to you
instead of when you're not here.
You call this movie Goofy?
And you also say that
Seth Green and Eugene Levy
appear in it unbilled.
I love when you mention the unbilled.
What year?
And the year is 2001.
Or
1947.
2001.
Eugene Levy, South Green,
appearing at unbilled
because it's a two-star movie,
at best, and it's goofy.
And it's based on a cartoon.
And there are 12 names.
How many names do you think you can get it in?
Fuck.
I'll try 10.
That's a good starter bid.
Go to Chris.
I'll say nine.
Whoa, that was Lucas Lee style right there.
It kind of came out really different than the way I meant to speak normally.
Instead, I was like, I'll say nine.
Are you talking to that chair over there?
Clint Eastwood voice.
Okay, Adam.
I might go zero names on this.
Maybe.
Or for sure-sies.
But it might be a big mistake
because maybe I'm not...
I don't know.
I might not...
2001?
Yes.
I... Did you go eight names?
Yeah, just do your thing
Chris has to get out of here
I'll go five names
Five names says Adam
Leonard
Go lower, make him name it
Four names
Now who's got a piss
I can't do that
I can't fuck with four names
So say name that movie Leonard Maltin
Name that shit bitch
No I tell you exactly what to say
You must be a nightmare to work with that shit, bitch. Whoa, I tell you exactly what to say.
You must be a nightmare to work with. Oh, I don't want to shave my beard.
I'll put the word
bitch in any sentence I want. What's the play,
bitch?
Alright.
It's just the beer talking.
You're not a bitch.
Did you put that stuff in Prague?
I didn't think so.
All right.
He keeps it cool in Prague.
You don't want to get arrested in Prague.
Is this Josie and the Pussycats?
I didn't even give you the names,
and that's right!
We got a three-way motherfucking tie in this shit.
We gotta
settle this.
Apologies to Comedy Bang Bang.
We won't be here next week,
so Comedy
Bang Bang will start on time next week.
Wow.
Who knew this would
come down to this?
As only Maltin could.
We've never had this exciting of a game when you're playing.
I've never gotten a correct answer before either.
What did you think it was, Adam?
Scooby-Doo?
Scooby-Doo 2.
Yeah.
Part 2.
Oh, you almost stepped in it.
Because that's like 04, right?
Scooby-Doo 2?
You know, that's one thing
I'm not much of an expert on.
When did that movie
I had no interest in come out?
That was...
In fact, I've got to bring it up now,
real quick.
I auditioned for Scooby-Doo 2.
Did you, Chris?
How'd it go?
Really well.
Nailed it.
All right.
This was played on the show once.
I had a category called Full Review where I'd read the entire review.
And do you remember your review of Scooby-Doo 2 Monsters Unleashed?
No, I don't.
Your review was five whopping words.
And it was, it is what it is.
I do remember that.
That's awesome.
What year did it come out?
Oh, yeah.
That's why we're looking it up.
2004.
Yes.
Yes.
No extra points for that.
Come on.
Don't get cocky.
All right.
So what happened there?
Leonard got the point.
And who challenged him?
Chris challenged him.
So we'll start with Adam.
I did that shit.
Start with Adam and then come right back at you, Chris.
So pay attention.
Trying.
Trying.
Have beer, 11 or 12.
I'm going to piss so bad.
That's what gets you to stop drinking?
I'm almost done with this.
You don't want to push more pee through?
Captain America peed in front of everybody.
Okay.
Did you know that you can order,
you can walk up and just say
I'll have carnitas
I'll have
Just a taco with carnitas
And then you get to choose the ingredients
Be it cheese, sour cream
Hot, medium
Mild salsa
Farm, fresh
Ingredients, people
Anyway, sorry
Sorry, Doug.
Doug loves guests,
triple nipple,
or songs about Rambos?
Doug loves guests.
Doug loves guests.
Would you like a movie
that one of you three gentlemen
was in from 1990
or 2004?
I didn't make movies in
1990.
Good poker mouth.
That's what I'm going to call it from now on when
somebody reveals too much. Poker mouth.
Because Adam
doesn't know that. You could have been
a child actor.
I'll go 2004.
To get all three of us in it. Adam doesn't know that. You could have been a child actor. I'll go 2004. Okay.
To get all three of us in it.
So that eliminates Gremlins 2, the new batch from 1990 starring Leonard Maltin.
Oh, well.
Okay, Adam, this is from 2004.
Either you or Chris is in it.
Two and a half stars.
Or Leonard Maltin.
Well, we could play that game
theoretically
he's only in that one film
that I just said
right?
yeah
yeah
he's the film critic
that refuses to play himself
which is awesome
I love that about him
because how many times
do we need to see Larry King
play himself in a movie?
I'm not satisfied yet
two and a half stars for Mr. Moulton I'm not satisfied yet two and a half stars
for Mr. Moulton
I'm not going to agree or disagree
your first two words of the reviewer
not bad
not bad
and it's based on
a story
it's based on a story... It's based on a story by one guy
who also wrote another thing.
That's a good clue.
No, you say about this movie,
entertaining enough as long as
you ignore the many plot holes.
So, first of all,
how dare you in front of my guests?
Wait, when was it released?
It was released...
2004.
It was released in 2004?
Yeah, could be one of your movies,
could be one of Adam's movies.
You guys haven't worked together.
Sounds like a lot of money.
And...
He lists ten names.
Adam, how many do you think you can get it in?
Huh.
2004. While you think about it, I'll do you think you can get it in? Huh. Four.
While you think about it, I'll do my plug.
Okay.
Hang on.
I'm going to be at the Ann Arbor Comedy Showcase
October 6th at 420,
the Arlington Draft House in Arlington, Virginia,
October 7th.
I'm doing a taping of Douglas Movies
at the Gramercy Theater in New York City
on Monday, October 8th.
Adam?
What's your bid?
Eleven names?
Yeah. I'll go five names.
Parks and Rec is back Thursday nights.
Chris?
I'll do three names.
Wow.
Captain America 2, when can we look for that?
We start
in March. Nice.
No, no applause. I have to piss. Let's get
through this.
Try to show up for work with a shave.
Try to shave before you show up.
I'll go two names.
You prick. Wait, wait a second.
Can you do that? Can St. Leonard get to bid?
Oh, sorry.
Interesting ploy.
No one's ever tried that.
Skip past the guy who's not into it.
So you said four?
Yeah.
Okay, Chris said four.
What do you think, Leonard?
So who's the low bid, then?
It comes to you.
You can go lower than four,
or you can tell them to name it.
Name the movie.
All right, Chris.
I'm going cellular.
Your four names are...
Chris Evans is our winner!
It's Cellular!
Not bad.
If you ignore the many plot holes. Where's the bathroom?
Just run backstage and the guy who's been giving you all those beers will show you where to go.
Chris Evans, everybody.
Yeah, he won, right?
So, Jessica, where's Jessica?
There you are.
Here you go, Jessica.
Congratulations.
Do you want your millhouse back?
Do you like, are you fond of your millhouse?
Jessica, if you want your VHS tapes, you can meet me out front.
Okay.
So she's going to meet him out front for that.
That's fun.
I didn't know a rendezvous would be in the prize bag.
And do we have shitheads written on the back of these?
Not on the back of Kiss Me Kate,
but we have one on the back of this other weird thing.
Who?
All right.
I'll try to say that.
Where's the Kiss Me Kate girl?
Katie. Hey, can you write on the back of yours someone for me to call a shoot head?
And Leonard, the new
Leonard Maltin's 2013
movie guide, Two Oceans 13
I like to say, is
in booksellers now.
Sellers online, offline.
If you can find a bookstore that's open,
you can get it there, or you can use
the internet.
I said second place was
going to get this, but you guys tied for second place.
So...
She's moving.
So she gets it
because she's moving.
You know, it was
expediency that I liked about it.
I'm moving.
Oh, that's a good reason.
If that guy had said,
I'm an asshole,
okay, you get it.
But she said, I'm moving.
So you get to pack that
into an incredibly heavy box
with all your other books.
Apologies to the other guy.
But you know what I'll do?
I'll throw her name in
as your shithead
in addition to the one you picked.
So, and Parks and Rec Thursday nights
and lots of other stuff.
Adam Scott.
And...
As always,
Johnny Witter Wilson is a shithead.
Oh, and...
Chris Evans' dick is a shithead.
Katie's a shithead.
And this is one of the weirder ones I've had in a while.
Glendale is a shithead.
The city of Glendale. Thank you.