Doug Loves Movies - Colt Cabana, Kevin "Heff" Kellam and Carina Magyar guest
Episode Date: May 9, 2022Live from Zanies in Rosemont, Doug welcomes Colt Cabana, Kevin "Heff" Kellam and Carina Magyar to the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on Stitcher Premium. For a free... month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Transcript
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Hey everybody, producer Ryan here. We had a few technical problems with this episode, so the audio isn't the best, but it's still very listenable.
So please enjoy the show, and please enjoy this very special acapella version of the theme song.
Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming baby-sticky seats.
With 50-ounce and pop-art turtles in his feet. There's still not
one that he won't see
cause the
Bums movies!
Yeah!
Hey, hey, hey, everybody.
I got out here fast.
My name is Doug, and I love movies.
This is God Loves Movies.
That is, like, almost perfect.
Except for a couple of guys.
I'm just kidding. It's so great to be back here once again
at Zadie's in Rosemont, Illinois
Ohara adjacent
home of the Chicago Dogs!
Do they mean like hot dog dogs?
Or animal dogs?
Or in some cases both?
I get it now.
I gotta go see the Chicago Dogs play.
Sounds exciting.
I'm gonna go there right after I get my
another round over at Toby Keith's.
I love his bar and grill.
Is that now Bub City?
Yeah.
Okay.
All right.
Same game, different name.
But I guess Bub doesn't have any tax problems.
It's Thursday, May 5th, 2022,
a.k.a. Cinco de Mayo!
Cinco de Mayo!
Cinco de Mayo! Cinco de Hayo!
Yeah, that's my, you know, stealing culture.
I feel like this audience has already trashed on margaritas.
They got margaritas here?
Wow, sneaky.
But I was going to say also,
you probably fucked up on guac.
They got guac too?
Oh my goodness.
Zane, what's happened?
We got a different wall back here?
It would hurt to have your face rubbed against it?
That's my initial impression of it.
That's the first thing I think of when I'm looking at a wall that I'm going to be near.
How's that going to feel to have my face rubbed up against that?
But no one has ever too fucked up on Glock
to enjoy
this part of the show called
Doug Plugs!
I love you
pretending to be excited about places
I'm gonna go
in the future. Doug Loves Movies
is coming to
the Come and Take It
Festival in Houston, Texas May 21st to 22nd Yeah, Come and Take It Festival in Houston, Texas, May 21st to 22nd.
Yeah, come and take it.
Come and take it.
Push my face against the wall.
And we're doing two tapings in San Diego during Comic-Con.
This is for people who really like to plan ahead, July 20th and 23rd.
For all my dates and deets and links,
go to DougLovesMovies.com
That's DougLovesMovies.com
Yeah!
Come on!
What?
Shh!
Is that dancing?
Oh, chef's kiss.
That was just...
I never...
Really impressive.
Listen to that, other towns.
Here's the prize bag I brought a little tote
From the Netflix is a joke festival
They gave all the participants
I guess a tote
So I used that to be the bag
And I've got a hat
That says hanging
on by a thread
which I
think the hat was to promote
what was that show
no
it's the one that just ended where
it was five seasons it started
on TBS and then it moved to
HBO Max or somewhere.
Anyway.
Search party! Fucking search party
is what it's called!
I don't need guests.
I can just ask myself questions.
I get
excited when I come up with the answer.
But anyway,
they sent this hat to me, I'm pretty sure,
to promote season four
of that show, and I wore it a few
times, and it's a lovely hat.
You might, you know, want to
wash it or whatever you do to a hat
that's been previously owned
by some hippie, but
but
I
never want to wear it again
because hanging on by a thread
it's just too much of a conversation starter
people are always just like, oh are you alright?
I'm like, what are you talking about?
well it says on your hat you're hanging by a thread
I'm just like, alright
what does it say on your underwear?
so here's a t-shirt
from the Netflix is a joke festival
because they just give you one
they don't care what size you are
they just want you to be funny
they don't want to know what's measuring you
so also from Netflix is a joke
I feel bad that everything Netflix gave me
I'm paying forward
to use an expression,
but holy shit, they put this fucking logo
on every goddamn thing.
Like, there's pens in here that say...
And Netflix is a joke.
The festival's a lot of words
to get on a piece of merch.
But I can't even tell you what this thing is.
It's just got Velcro on it and a flap.
It's, like, not a purse.
It's not a wallet.
It's a... it and a flap it's like not a purse it's not a wallet
it's a pullet or worse it's worse
all right so there's that and a little uh happy fiesta hat
and a little happy fiesta hat
a little tiny fiesta hat
not to sink up
oh and a
handkerchief thingy
that is not recommended by science
to do anything
but it also says
it was a joke festival
this is the laziest prize bag but it also says Bethel is going to have a joke festival on it
this is the laziest
prize bag, I also brought
a couple of pins from
Rockin' Pins
Doug Benson pin and
very limited edition Doug Loves Movies pin
all that's going to be won
by somebody, it's all for fun
here, you know, basically
it's not a serious competition.
And I've got three terrific guests.
Would you like me to bring them out here?
All right, two out of the three people coming out here have nicknames,
so that's just complicated.
That's just, I don't need that kind of confusion.
So let me make sure I get everybody's names absolutely right.
Please welcome
Kevin Half Kellum, Scott Colt Cabana, and Karina Maggio! Hello, hello, hello.
Howdy.
Ah, what a terrific group.
Let's meet them individually and alphabetically.
What's happening?
Oh, she's impressed that I'm wearing socks.
Thank you very much.
Oh, okay.
Yep, socks and then shoes.
That's interesting.
I was, you know, kind of kidding when I said people are fucked up already,
but she has got a lot to say about one of my guests' sock wear.
And now he's taking clothes off.
I mean, she's going to talk about this sweatshirt the whole time.
I'm just going to take it off, and here we go.
All right.
Well, she's going to take more off than that.
This is really quite a show so far.
Keep going.
What if this happened?
People are like, ah, I hate that t-shirt.
What are you, a jerk, wearing those pants?
Who's first alphabetically?
Oh, he is.
Welcome back to the show, Colt Camano!
Colt Camano! Colt Cabana! Hello, Colt Cabana!
It's funny that that one didn't catch on, that chant, but enough people knew it.
You've got to feel good about that.
I do feel good.
That is a chant that the wrestling fans will chant at a show. And it's nice to see that I have crossover appeal here.
It's crossover appeal.
That's not sweet.
Yeah, this lady, she is really excited.
She's really treating this like she's at wrestling.
Like you can say as much as you want whenever you want.
And it won't be an issue.
But this is a different kind of thing.
But we still have someone from wrestling working security.
Scott is in the show and also providing security for the show.
I've never seen you like this on my show before,
with the arms out like that.
I didn't plan on it, but I was wearing a Cubs hoodie.
I'm not, like, listen, it's not Cubs or socks for me it's just baseball right okay all right welcome to dunk loves baseball everybody
yeah this show is always shifting based on the moods of my guests. But yeah, there's people, there's this crossover there going on too.
That shows you the power of movies, is that stupid sports fans love movies just as much
as the rest of us do.
I went and saw it.
It went out in the theater.
I was still yelling at the screen the entire time.
Yeah, I won't see a sports movie in a
theater because there's too much yelling. Too many people in the audience think they're watching the
actual sport. It ruined the blind side for me. Listen I had money going on Rocky in that first
one. I lost my ass. Hey hey hey this is not a spoiler show.
Look, it's six Rockies in.
Don't you tell me what happened in Rocky I.
Pretty unconventional ending, though, for a sports movie.
I did like that.
You went the distance, and that's what mattered.
Right?
But you know what I mean?
Sports movie, they either win or they die.
He didn't either.
I never thought about it like that before.
I'm very excited to have come up with that.
This might be a show I have to go back and listen to.
But thank you for being here, Colt. You say Scott or Colt is okay because we're friends and whatnot, but I'm going to here, Colt. I go with, you know, you say, Scott, our Colt is okay
because we're friends and whatnot,
but I'm going to call you Colt.
I'll allow it.
I like the pose you're making right there, too, right now.
It's very, yeah.
Somebody in the audience, paint this guy.
Yeah, give him some sleeves.
Like, when you have a hoodie on,
it doesn't seem like you have those gigantic arms.
When they're out like that,
it's just all I can think about.
This guy's thinking,
I'd hate to see Doug Benson.
I'm just seeing a bicep.
So sorry, I'm in your way.
Is this Doug Loves Movies
or a screening of
Over the Top
Doug I don't know if you noticed but I'm wearing
the hat he wears in Over the Top
and
like a switch
that's like a switch that's like a jocks version of graduating
from something
thank you for being here
and what do you have there in your hands
I don't tell my guests to bring stuff for the prize bag
but this is special
oh thank you very much I have a documentary, I have three documentaries I have I don't tell my guests to bring stuff for the prize bag, but this is special.
Well, thank you very much.
Yeah, I have a documentary.
I have three documentaries I have called The Wrestling Road Diaries, one, two, and three, available at cultmerch.com.
I brought one of those.
And then I also have an upper deck card for AEW.
I signed it, and I will give that away, which kind of goes into a movie. I was in a movie called The Jack of All Trades, which was on Netflix.
It was about my friend Stu Stone,
whose father sold baseball cards
and then left him,
and he made a documentary about it,
pretending it was about baseball cards,
but it was really about the loss of his father.
And he interviewed me for it,
and I was in the movie, so I was proud of that.
That's cool.
Is that a prequel to Aziz Ansari's Master of None?
That should have gotten more.
That's okay.
They're saving up. They know I'm better than that. But it's a perfect lead-in to introducing our next guest,
our first-time guest on the program,
also with a nickname.
We're going to dive into that, figure out what's going on there.
It's Kevin Heff Kelman, everybody!
Hey, what's up?
Heff with two F's.
Yeah, it's my middle name.
It's Heffernan.
It's my grandmother's maiden name.
Oh, okay.
H-E-double-F-E-R-N-A-N spells Heffernan.
She sang that, and it's drilled in my head until I die.
I was shocked it had more lyrics.
I was really like, wait a second.
I thought this was just a spelling song.
The last part was creative interpretation.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, you went off.
But thanks for being here and for being a first-time guest.
This is awesome.
This is just crazy.
The show I listen to on the train is like,
all right, now I'm on it.
You're not on a train is like, alright, now I'm on it. You're not
on a train right now.
That lady is.
The train to Hangover Town.
Oh.
That's not a train noise.
Alright, so.
I'm popped by the
sailor train. Alright. so... I'm popped by the sailor train.
Alright.
What's your deal?
You're on terrestrial radio? Yes.
I'm on America's fastest dying medium,
FM radio.
And that is what everyone who's
19 years old who has like four
TikTok videos tell us.
But no, hey, let me just
say something. We play Aerosmith,
people in their 50s
start making out somewhere.
That's what I'm saying.
Yeah,
you're like that Pixar movie.
You're the good dinosaur.
Yeah,
yeah.
Yeah,
they're all showing you
Buzz Lightyear,
but you come back
to Woody, baby.
You come back to him.
Yeah,
yeah.
Yeah,
I'm on,
I'm on 10490X in Rockford
and I'm on in
Springfield, Illinois as well
in 97.7 QC
Nice
Yeah, you got some people there
Some fans, and you podcast as well
Yeah, Sportskeeda Wrestling
We're number one in Ireland, and I'll take it
So
Here we go
Wait, you really did put your hoodie back on
I thought it was time
Can you imagine if his arms need to breathe
Every once in a while
Just take them out and let them breathe for a bit
And get them all cozy again
I got self-conscious
And finally, another repeat guest I got self-conscious.
And finally, another repeat guest,
formerly appearing on the program in Austin, Texas,
and now a Chicago comedy phenom,
it's Karina Magyar, everybody! Karina Magyar!
I'm so excited to be here.
I'm sorry that you don't...
But I am wearing the underwear
that Lou Gossett Jr. wore in Iron Eagle 2.
So...
What was the full title of that one?
Was it just Iron Eagle 2, or was there
a fun subtitle?
No, they changed the underwear out.
Oh!
subtitle. No, they changed the underwear out.
Oh!
I see you've got lots of shows going on in
Chicago. Like, Chicago's really,
you're really doing it up, right?
It's been kind to me.
Yeah, right? How long have you been here?
I've been here for nine months.
So I'm about to have a comedy baby
here, I guess. for nine months. So I'm about to have a comedy baby here.
I'm wearing socks.
She can't pay attention, she's drinking. She's trying trying to drink gotta focus on the drinking
well thanks for coming out to rosemont i appreciate it it's a little bit of a
drive or whatever right i took the train oh A line of wonders. Sounds great.
Yes.
And smells.
And smells and sights.
And I talked to a nice lady who complimented me on my dress six times and then passed out.
I told her I got into New Orleans and she turned to her boyfriend and said,
you're going to take me there, right?
That was it. That's all we heard from her.
Comfortment.
You brought her to the show.
She's in the front row.
Drunk people screw the order up
and they tend to live, repeat, die.
They're in their own sports community
and win or die.
Yeah.
All right.
Well, I didn't warn any of you
about this next part of the show,
so I hope it doesn't take anybody too off guard.
We'll start with Colt down there on that end.
You all actually did sit down
in last name alphabetical order.
But Colt, could you please recommend one film?
It could even be the one you just handed me.
Or anything else that you want to recommend,
but just one movie.
Just recommend one movie.
Okay, so it just came out.
I just watched this.
What?
No, it's just funny the way you're like,
okay, you're already making excuses
for whatever it is you're about to say.
Don't hate me.
There's no judgment.
No judgment.
I watched The Survivor on HBO Max,
which is about a survivor of the Holocaust,
and then he became a boxer.
And I'm not that much of an emotional man
as a big, tough, dumb wrestler,
but I started crying during it.
I was watching it alone.
I started crying.
And as a Jewish wrestler, it really hit me.
And it was very emotional.
And I really didn't know much about it.
I thought it was just kind of just a throwaway movie.
And then I went and did research.
And they were like, oh, everyone should be awarded for every award.
And I was like, yes, of course.
It's great.
It's so good.
It's pretty new?
Yeah, brand new.
I feel it just came out a couple of days ago.
And I think the main reason I watched it
was because he was a boxer,
and there's something about boxing movies
that I feel you just can't go wrong.
The one during...
Hold on, my words.
What's his name?
The guy who was in...
Hold on.
He's got the things on the board and then
he goes kind of crazy, but that's not the movie.
Russell Crowe, yes.
I don't like where this is going
for my
podcast game show.
And then he was
in... He was acting out every question
for the audience.
He was in a boxing movie
which was...
Cinderella.
Cinderella, man.
Nailed it.
I'm going to collect
all of your name tags
and you'll all be on my team.
Why did you describe
a beautiful mind
but you were trying
to get something
to do with it?
I like that a beautiful mind
too is as much as
stuff on a board.
I saw it immediately. I saw how the fucking chalkboard had what a beautiful mind, too, is as much stuff on a board. I saw it immediately.
I saw the fucking chalkboard.
What a beautiful mind that guy had.
You know, the movie with Tom Hanks where he's a kid, but then he's an adult.
You know, the one with Apollo 13.
There's a flashback at the beginning of Apollo 13.
The whole time he's up there, he's a little boy inside of a man's body.
We didn't know.
I just once liked to see
an astronaut movie where they show
the origin story
and they show them when they're a little kid,
the last thing they want to be is an astronaut.
Because little kids all want to be astronauts.
It's not the most inspiring origin story.
It's like, okay, great, you're boring.
You did the same thing your whole life. You thought, that sounds fun when you were
four and you never let go. What's the line in the movie
when the mom is all worried, the grandmom of him, goes to the little kid,
you worried my little boy's going to die up there? He's fine. He could drive a
refrigerator up there if they needed to. I hope he's not a Cubs fan, though.
It doesn't matter.
It's a ridiculous line about him trying to
drive a fridge in space.
I had something.
Yeah, you did. You were really on to something.
But apparently if we go
more than a couple minutes without talking
about the Cubs,
her face rises up out of her drink
and she yells something.
Her face rises up out of her drink and she yells something.
It's always talking to me when this sort of thing is happening so early in the show.
Because it never feels like it's going to get better.
It just makes me tense the entire time.
But sometimes you never know.
They go into shut-off mode mode and they'll just suddenly be quiet
and you go okay
I should not talk about it anymore
just be grateful
maybe we're all very soothing
so we talk at this time
for 30 seconds
come for the movie trivia but stay for the movie trivia, but stay for the ASMR.
Too worked up about your favorite sports team?
Doug Lowe's movies will calm you down.
All right, so...
Great recommendation.
The Survivor.
So you're saying it's in motion picture theaters?
I watch it on HBO Max.
Oh, HBO Max, okay.
What about you, Hef?
It is, it's a documentary.
It's one of the best documentaries of all time.
King of Kong.
It's a documentary I've watched over and over again.
And then there's these little things I see,
and I'm like, all right, then it's satisfying in that.
And it reminds me of Beyond the Man.
I know you're a big fan of Beyond the Man. But it like, there's these little things I see, and I'm like, all right, then it's satisfying in that. And it reminds me of Beyond the Man. I know you're a big fan of Beyond the Man.
But there's this whole world of characters of these adult men in the mid-2000s who want to beat Pac-Man.
And then there's this whole subplot.
It needs to be made into a comedy with actors playing the role.
It feels like it's going to be, because the trend now seems to be if a documentary is decent,
they're like, let's hire actors to just
act it all out
for all the dummies who don't watch documentaries.
The guy who cheats and
still runs the governing board
with the scores and everything and
sells his hot sauce, he's like out of
an 80s movie with his
mullet and everything. I can't remember his name. Billy something, right?
Billy Mitchell.
When I was in the WWE, they sent me
to their minor league system in Florida
and we would do shows in Tampa
and the paying customers would watch us
and I remember one of the regulars
was this guy named Todd who was in the movie
and I was like,
he's cheering for me and I'm like,
oh my god, you're 7th in the movie, and I was like, he's cheering for me, and I'm like, oh my God, you're seventh in the world in Galaga.
I'm such a fan of yours.
That movie's so good, The King of Kong.
I agree.
This suplex is for you, buddy.
Oh, there you go.
Do you want to switch your answer to his answer, Colt?
It's a great movie.
No, but this is good, becauset? It's a great movie. I'm, I'm, I'm,
no, but this is good because, you know,
King of Kong's out there.
It's probably, you know,
streaming and yours
is on HBO Max,
but let's, let's see
what Karina's got for us.
What do you think?
Uh, I was going to recommend
T10.
Ooh.
It's spelled like Titanic,
but with just the E on the end.
It's,
that's how many people saw it.
Yeah.
Is that Eminem's rap group from Detroit?
It's a French
movie about a woman who
fucks a car.
And exactly what you think might
happen, happens.
But in exactly
all the ways you really weren't
ready to see.
I think that's why I haven't seen it.
It does sound like it's going to be pretty shocking.
It is the funniest movie of all time.
Is it intentionally French?
No, it's intentionally French,
but it is so...
The French part on purpose, but everything else...
Everything you hate about foreign films is packed into this foreign film,
and then they just keep piling on stranger and stranger shit
until you're like, fuck fuck this is a good American film
Freedom Friday is what you're saying
Freedom Friday
yeah
it's all true
it's all true
well those are all terrific recommendations
and I think
they all are available to
be seen at home for people who want to
check any of them out
and
yeah thank you for visiting
Recommendation Nation
it's time for our
first break
let's go to that now we'll be right back
we're back we had a real lively name-tag selection situation going on
Colt is going to play for Doctor Strange and the Moltony verse.
Of madness.
Go ahead.
How's your Russell Crowe knowledge?
Okay.
There's not even any games today where you get to go to the audience.
Yeah, so don't even
worry about his knowledge.
It's all on you, Colt.
Oh, no.
Does it work by painting pictures on a brick wall behind me will you understand the movies that
are coming out of my mouth
that's what we're moving ask me which one I'm not sure.
Rush Hour.
Rush Hour 2, yeah.
Hef.
I have to ask the questions and answer them?
What a weird game show.
Just watch Extra Beck running around between three podiums.
Okay, Hef, who'd you pick?
King of Seth and Island.
That's it, King of south and island so but it's
uh it's your face on his head yeah uh and well it's not my face on top of his head it's my face
over his face it's classic face off somewhere there's a poster of one of my movies where his
face is now there instead of mine.
And he's enjoying it more because he's probably got a shirt on, so he's more comfortable.
He's probably got a joint.
These mainstream movies, even King of Staten Island, that poster, he has no joint.
That's the next thing you should do, isn't it?
Because it looks like he could be holding one.
Certainly looks proud.
It looks proud like a joint holder and Karina you picked I
think in C no Dan yes so elegant so simple so quiet and in the back of the
room that it just yelled to you particularly trying to get picked but
felt obligated to try that's the energy I want
that's like, that's so much better
than not bringing a name tag
or bringing a really cool one
you know what I mean?
because the really cool ones, I acknowledge
that they're really cool, and they got
two really cool ones got picked
but that's the underdog back there.
The guy that didn't even try.
That's my favorite kind of underdog.
Like in the movie Rudy, he never even gets to play,
but they still put him on their shoulders.
The whole movie was like a participation trophy movie.
You can tell he needs this, but he's not going to try.
He's a human tagline.
Alright, so
the first game we're going to play today
is one of my favorites,
and it's no fun to play over Zoom.
I've got to be in person where I can see everybody.
It's called Live, Die, Repeat.
Live, Die, Repeat.
It's so simple, people get confused by it.
I'm going to say the title of a motion picture
slowly, one word
at a time. You all get
to guess as often as you'd like what
the full title is.
The first person to say it completely and correctly
is the winner.
Every time somebody gives a wrong answer
I'll go back to the beginning.
So yeah, there's a hint.
It's more than one
word I appreciate nobody looking at me like this is the dumbest game you've
ever heard of just what usually happens and that's I enjoy that too I enjoy I
enjoy people enjoying this game and I enjoy people hating this game
you can do either one and it tickles me
knowing that people
feel strongly one way or the other
about this
alright are you ready for it
let me see
not the audience
I feel like that guy's ready
to yell out just the people on stage
please and the word cubs isn't in this I feel like that guy's ready to yell out, just the people on stage, please.
And the word cubs isn't in this.
Once upon a cuckoo's nest. I was right in my head. Is that a version of One Kilometer Cuckoo's Nest
reenacted by children?
Oh my god.
Gee whiz.
It's not going to get any funnier than that tonight.
Savor it, everybody.
Oh, my God.
Well, I'll start again.
Once
upon Once upon a time in Mexico.
That is correct!
That is correct!
How the hell...
I don't think we're going to get a chance.
How did you rule out
once upon a time in America,
once upon a time in Hollywood,
once upon a time in...
There's been a few.
How did you go right to Mexico?
Well, I thought about the day today.
That's probably what did it for me, too.
And today is National Cuckoo Nest Day. That's probably what did it for me too.
And today is National Cuckoo Nest Day.
I just love the trouble you have with Cuckoo's Nest. It's Cuckoo Nest Day!
Cuckoo's Nest. Cuckoo's Nest.
Cuckoo's nest Cuckoo's nest Cuckoo Cuckoo
Well congratulations
You did it
You got the laugh of the night
And then proceeded to win the game
That's the kind of turnaround
That can happen
In competitive
Trivia games
It's not the only turnaround.
Oh, no.
Here it goes.
He's going to give that
so much for a backhand, this kid.
But do you do that
when you're winning
or do you do that
when you need to rally?
Or is that when the fans do it,
that means they want to rally for the participants?
It's got to be your bowl.
Movie quote. Nailed it. Let's go.
Tommy Boy. The only movie I know.
Well, guess what you won, Colt?
I won something? Yeah.
Go on.
It's like he's never been on the
show before. You won.
You get to go first in the next game.
Yeah.
And you get that endorphin rush
from being so good at what you
just did. Doing it so
well.
But you just get to go first in this next game.
Doesn't even necessarily give you an advantage.
I've oftentimes had people complain
that they're at a disadvantage
when they go first in my games.
So that's what you get for being a winner.
It's time to play ABCD's
Nuts!
It's a crass name. I don't know why it stuck.
Because this is an educational
game.
Austin knows.
This is a spelling game
where I'm going to
tell you what we're spelling tonight.
And Colt gets the first letter.
And by spelling it, I mean you just have to name a movie that begins with the letter that's next in the word.
And we'll go through this word.
And if anybody ever matches the movie that I wrote down with the corresponding letter,
then you just win the whole game automatically.
It just ends it.
I think it recently ended on the second one.
Fucking Sam Levine.
Because also there is a theme,
so that's why you are at a bit of a disadvantage here, Colt,
because you don't know the theme yet, but you get the first letter.
But you could strangely take
the whole thing down by
some sort of miracle.
I think it's
good.
And since today is Cinco de Mayo
and this episode will be
released at the end of the weekend
four days
from now,
it's the perfect time to spell
Cinco de Mayo.
First letter is C.
Colt Cabana begins with
two C's.
Scott has a C in it.
Cubs begin with a C
What's your C movie?
Chicago
I would do that theme
but there's no movies called Rosemar
I thought for sure
I won that.
You know, it's not that easy around here.
This is a tough neighborhood.
The Parkway
Bank Park
Entertainment District.
Don't you come to those
rough streets of Rosemont.
We'll hang you from the water tower, bitch.
With a beautiful rose on it.
Alright, so for my letter C, and to give you an idea of the theme, but, you know, the theme could be people that are in it, subject matter, whatever.
The movie I wrote down for C is Christmas with the Cranks.
It's never too early to warn people about that movie.
December is only a month. Don't watch Christmas with the Cranks.
It's not worth the trouble.
We move to Hef, and the letter, of course, is I.
Interstellar.
Okay, that's a movie that begins with I, so you remain in the game.
You'd be surprised.
You've heard it.
It's tough under pressure to do this.
Some people really blank out.
I went with a motion picture called Independence Day.
Yeah.
Gives people some ideas.
So, Karina, the next movie begins with the letter N.
I know this isn't it,
but I've never been kissed.
That isn't it,
but always worth mentioning.
Josie Grossie.
I mean, was she 47
when she made that movie?
Pretending to be a high school student.
Really fun movie, though.
Very enjoyable.
It's never too old to go back to your roots.
I know you didn't say that.
The answer is New Year's Eve.
Oh.
New Year's Eve.
Ow, says a guy in the audience.
Ow. Ow, says a guy in the audience. Ow.
Ow, I got this.
It's C again.
Back to you, Colt.
Can you come up with another C title?
I still believe
in my theme.
Oh, okay.
I like this.
I will go with Chicago Heat.
Okay.
That's it, right?
That's not what I put down.
But it is a movie
that begins with the letter C.
So congratulations on that.
I wrote down a film called
Crossing Delancey.
Yeah.
Huh?
Wait, what?
Hmm.
Okay.
Gets weirder and weirder.
The next letter is O, and that goes to Kevin Hef.
Kellum.
I'm going to jump from you.
I'm going to say over the top.
Over the top.
Right, because that would have been a fun psychic moment
if I had written that down today
and then came here with the over the top jokes.
But that was not to be.
I wrote down office Christmas party.
It was close.
Oh, yeah.
Close.
Very close. Oh, yeah. Close? Very close.
All right, so now we're at the letter D.
I'm going to stick with this theme where we just play our own theme.
I think that's not a bad way to play, because you don't lose anything.
I'm going to go with a boxing movie, Diggstown.
Oh, yeah, that is a boxing movie.
We determined this evening
there's no bad boxing movies,
so I won't say another word about it.
It's good, though, I think.
I think it is good.
I haven't seen it in a minute,
but I think it's good.
Southpaw, don't get me started on that.
All right.
I wrote down deck the halls.
Deck the halls, yeah.
E is the next letter.
Back to you, Colt.
Exit to Eden.
Rosie O'Donnell in bondage gear is,
I was going to say, very very nice to look at
I don't know why you're groaning
very rude
Dan Aykroyd
on the other hand
you do not want any part of that
that's a real free Skinemex
weekend movie
that was a wild one to decipher in my teenage years, I'll tell you that much.
When you said free Skinamax, I was like, Skinamax is in jail?
Free Skinamax.
E, did I say E?
Did you say E?
Oh yeah, you did say one.
You said one with two E's in it.
I picked Eight Crazy Nights.
M for half.
M?
M.
Masticman?
M.
Nope.
nope I said
Mother's Day
which is also coming up
we'll have just concluded when this episode comes out
so sorry I missed you
hey
hey I'm trying to remember if they did one of those A A
I'm trying to remember if they did one of those
compilation movies where people are cool
and they're cool
Anaconda
No
You said the words Um, no.
You said the words.
The answer is April Fool's Day.
Does this mean I don't have to go first next?
Ah, you're playing strategically now.
I get it.
Just tell us you know the answer and then go ahead and miss it.
But yeah, April Fool's Day
was an actual horror movie.
Probably more than once.
I think they made it twice.
It wasn't nice.
Why is the next letter?
The theme gets a little shaky on this one, if you ask me.
Yes, man, it's boxing day.
Wait, are you hoping that it could just be yes, man?
Because there's a movie called Yes, Man, right?
Yeah.
And then you just thought, I'll add a few more words
in case it could be this other more descriptive title.
Yes Man at Christmas.
Yeah, I thought I would throw in a holiday of some sort.
The British remake starring Bob Hopkins.
Yes.
This one, you know, disagree with me if you like.
The letter Y was a tough one because apparently there's no Christmas movies
or movies about any holiday that begin with the letter Y, essentially,
that I could find.
Maybe somebody can let me know about one later.
So I went with You've Got Mail, which is quite Christmassy,
but I don't really think of it as a movie
about Christmas the way I think of
all these other Christmas movies
or whatever the
you know it's kind of the day it takes place
kind of thing in most cases
Crossing Delancey is kind of a
Hanukkah thing I think
yeah exactly
oh is the final letter it's Cinco de Mayo yeah exactly oh
is the final letter it's Cinco de Mayo
what do you think
it might be Hef
this is hard because I'm trying to like
nail it on the version of what you're thinking
right
I just want to survive
yeah
I really want to stay over the top two
I really was that say over the top two. I really just want to say over the top two.
Was that all that was called?
Just over the top two or did it have more words?
Let's go with over the top two.
Over the top two.
The tippy top.
This time he's got to get back his blimp and his daughter.
This time he's got to get back his blimp and his daughter.
O is also a difficult letter to do this with,
so I just went with off his Christmas party again.
So I'm insurance for doing over the top two.
We did it. Everybody wins.
Over the top two is not a movie.
Kevin loses.
Oh, you think they never made that?
Not even like a direct-to-video or anything?
It's probably a porn parody.
This time he goes under the bus.
Dan, you don't need to do this!
Turning his hat around backwards for a whole new reason.
Bill doesn't like a Bill in his face.
Listen.
This next game we're going to play,
Colt, you still get to go first.
You still get that advantage slash disadvantage.
We'll switch the order around in this one.
Then we'll go to Karina, then to Hef.
And we'll play that game after our second and final
commercial break. We'll be right back.
We're back!
Everybody's back. This worked out
terrific. So worked out terrific.
So good.
All right.
This is a game that I call The Little Search Engine That Could.
Here's how this works.
Welcome back.
I waited for you.
I typed the word super into the search engine
on IMDB.
And then I wrote down
the top eight titles
that came up.
Movie titles.
You know, some TV and other weird things
kind of get in there too.
But these are the top eight titles.
The super eight, if you will.
You'll take turns guessing titles.
You'll each get three guesses that we do
over three rounds.
And then any one that you get
right, the higher up on the list that it is, the more points it's worth.
The top answer's worth eight points, and the eighth answer is worth one point.
Unless you have any questions, Colt, what movie with the word super in it
do you think is number one
I mean I know that
that's number one to me
well that's one way to look
at it
it might be on the list but like
imagine like you're on Family Feud you have to think
about what are those other people
that are out there
voting what do they think?
I could care less about those people.
This is the IMDB
algorithm determining
the order of popularity.
I'm going to go with Super Troopers.
Super Troopers.
I got a good answer from the front row.
Super Troopers came in at number five.
So that puts Colt in an early lead with four points,
but it's still anybody's game.
We go to Karina.
It's just sitting there, so Superman?
That makes sense.
Superman is your answer.
Superman 1.
Are you sure?
Are you sure you don't
want to say April Fool's Day?
Just kidding.
And then give me another.
Now, unfortunately, Superman did not make the cut.
Yeah, so this is a tricky one.
We'll go to Hef next.
You'll still get two more guesses, Karina and Colt.
But Hef is still his first at bat.
Supersize me.
Supersize me. Interesting, I'm not familiar with that one. It's his first at bat. Super Size Me. Super Size Me.
Interesting. I'm not familiar with that one.
But it did make the list at number seven!
Two points for
Super Size Man
somebody in the audience is still saying Superman
like if I look again maybe I'll find it
which weirder things have happened
alright so Colt
you've had a little time to hear some other
answers and think it over
yeah
yeah
this is the one that
was the most obvious to me and I hope
because it's so obvious
it works in the algorithm I'm just going to say
the super with Joe Pesci
the super
oh my god he's looking at me with Joe Pesci. The Super with Joe Pesci.
Yes!
You think he's in the top eight movies
today
amongst people using
IMDB to look up
movie stuff.
It's the exact word
you're looking for.
The Super.
Makes so much sense.
It does.
As they say on Family Feud, good answer.
But all good answers are not necessarily
on the board
on that show.
And that movie stinks.
You thought you hate building superintendents
before you saw it.
It's like Scrooge without Christmas, right?
He's like a shitty...
He owns a building and he's shitty to people
and then he gets down on his luck and decides to be a good person.
And America loves him for it.
Has Joe Pesci ever been in a wrestling movie?
Not that I can think of.
Yeah, I don't think so.
Would have been fun.
It's probably too late now he only
appears in movies where they'll de-age him with special effects I don't know
how he stars in a movie called the Irishman but anyway that's not on the list yeah
sorry to make it so dramatic
but
this is very exciting
Karina we're back to you
you dropped this hint earlier
I did?
yes
super 8
that wasn't just a hint
I flat out said it
which is a tenant of this game and usually people pick it right away the one that I flat out said it. Which is a tenet of this game, and usually
people pick it right away, the one that I
said out loud, but this time it lasted
all this time.
And it's
number three on the list.
So you have sprung into
the lead with six points.
Six points from Super 8,
which is not about a motel.
It's about a bunch of children, so
settle, calm down.
Back to you, Hef.
We've knocked off some big...
Oh, I should make marks next to the ones
that have been said.
I'm going to make this official said make this official fuck it up anymore
I feel like you give the dumbest possible answer
right now
no I already did that
I get
oh man this is hard
I wanted to say Super 8 and you got to it
smart though smart
I want to say Superman 2 but I know that's not right
we're not in that direction
I'm going to go with Super Jaime
I'm going to follow him
that is so nice of you
so nice of you
what a terrific thing you're doing.
I didn't count it out.
I didn't want to know the actual number,
but no, it is not.
It is not currently in the top eight,
but you never know.
Like if I murder somebody,
shoot right up that chart.
Let's watch what started this psycho off.
Yeah, that 30 days of no weed
really made him into a fucking loon.
Murdering loon.
All right, so we're giving you a goose egg on that one.
But boy, what an exciting final round we have,
because Karina has six points.
It's not a commanding lead.
Colt is right there with four.
Kevin could still make this happen.
He's got two.
We're back to Colt.
This is your last chance
to name a movie that has super
in the title
everyone's gonna hate me
for this
there's no reason to hate you for
because you're gonna give a bad
answer or
I don't think that's a reason to hate
you
just cause you don't have like an
encyclopedic knowledge of movies
with super in the title.
I do, but there are ones that apparently aren't that good.
I'm going with Molly Shannon's
Superstar.
Ooh.
I like to put my fingers in here like this
and I like to hold them like that
and I like to keep them there for a while
and I like to pull them out suddenly
and I like to sniff them.
No, that's not a correct answer.
I'm sorry to say,
but that movie has so much love for it.
It's terrific.
Way more than the super.
She, yeah. People are like, Pesci, no, but Shannon.
Molly Shannon, yes.
She is not only a hilarious actress,
she's always great in everything that she's in,
and is a very nice person.
But I heard recently that she really has serious back issues.
Because when she played that Mary Catherine Gallagher character, she
I was just watching a rerun the other night.
Without looking or thinking about it, she'd just
hurl herself, like professional wrestler
shit, she would like hurl herself
into tables and chairs and stuff
every time they did that sketch.
Or through a wall, but it would be a
breakaway wall, but it still always
looked very violent and painful and she
just completely committed to it.
So thank you for bringing her up.
And hopefully she's not hooked on painkillers or anything.
That's what happened to Chevy Chase.
Yeah, I know.
Yeah, I'm bringing some hard truths to the town that loves catty shark.
The dark side of centering my dog.
I'm just saying, Jerry Lewis, everybody that does elaborate pratfalls, I don't know about Chaplin, but a lot of them,
it's bad for their backs.
And I'm worried for you, too.
I'm pretty fucked up, yeah.
So take it easy.
I'm going to need a win here so I can
afford my surgery, thank you.
Did no one tell
him about the no cash prize
situation?
Throw you some bus fare.
What was your answer?
It wasn't superstar.
So I'll say...
They wouldn't let you get away with that.
I'm sorry that I forgot because it was a good answer.
We're back to Karina.
I'm going to take a chance.
Solidify your lead even further if you get one of these right.
Okay, well, there's a new movie coming out that has a trailer
that might be getting a lot of interest on IMDb
as people look up, like, what's up with her?
Interesting.
Super Pets.
I like what you're doing. I really do.
It's about the pets.
Of all the superheroes
in the DC Extended Universe.
What is their group?
Like, when they go bowling, what do they call it?
The Justice League of...
That's it. it the Justice League of though you said so he
said all the words you've said all the words now just not all together at the
same time not in a row unbroken like to summon Beetlejuice I just want to give you this point so badly because she did sniff out that that movie
is in fact getting enough buzz that people are you know typing about it and it ended up on the list and pretty it's in a pretty good placement but I'm such a stickler for correct
titles on this show I know right people will yell at me if I if I let this go
and I take this responsibility seriously I'm not like somebody on SCOTUS or some
shit I'm not like somebody on SCOTUS or some shit I'm not laughing at the idea of what's going on with that
I'm just laughing at
pandering for applause
DC League of Super Pets is what you're looking for
yeah yeah
DC League of Super Pets
but
so close
and still in the lead
that's the great part
is that you're still
going to win this thing
was that on the list?
huh?
was it on the list?
yeah
what number?
it was number two yeah way the up there
yeah people are people are excited about it what a dumb name they should have called it super pet this is going to be another one of those harley quinn things where they start off with
a 90 word title right and then they go's seeing it, let's shorten the title.
Yeah, we gotta take it back, we gotta go straight Super Pets.
Nobody's coming.
When that happens, I want my points.
Nobody wants to...
Nobody knows what it is.
We're gonna throw it at you.
I'm coming for you.
You wanna win even more.
Yes.
You want it to be on the record, official,
that it eventually became Super Pets.
It's going to become Super Pets someday.
Alright, so
I know
Hef wouldn't have come up with that title.
So I don't feel bad about blowing it out.
It was a movie with dogs
and super involved
I'm going to say one of those awful movies
Super Puppies
I know that's not on there
wait let's back up a second
so your big
big move here at the end of this thing
is to name something
that we all already know
is absolutely not going to be on this list.
I feel like there's an Air Bud sequel.
Yeah, it's in the Air Bud universe.
It is.
She was in the DC universe.
I'm in the Air Bud universe.
I don't want any part of the Air Bud universe.
There ain't no rule in the book that says I can't bring up Air Bud.
That's true. You can bring it up.
I'm just saying I don't want to live in that world.
I mean, that dog is amazing, but everybody else, there's nothing else going on there.
I'd get bored really fast.
Unless I got to, you know, if it was my dog, then maybe I'd change my opinion.
But it just
belongs to some trainer and
he tells it to ignore me.
Trainers
need focus from their dogs.
They don't need dogs coming into the equation.
I want an exciting finish here, Hef.
We've still got
two minutes.
So, do me a favor.
Name a movie, a real movie.
Superman 2.
I expected it to be Superman.
I couldn't think of something else.
I'm so sorry.
That's all right.
That's okay.
I mean, it is, there are, it's, you'll see.
You'll see what the answers are.
Not unlike Family Feud, you'll do a lot of kicking of yourself.
But let's say this, Karina is our winner tonight.
We haven't seen you, Encino Dan. Encino Dan, come get your winnings.
He's over there wheezing the juice.
Congratulations, man.
I guess your posters are going to have to be bigger next time.
You know, if you went bigger,
then they wouldn't even see you little Encino Dan in the back.
All right.
You know, if Steve Harvey skipped this part on Family Feud it'd be
so frustrating you always want to know the ones that were on the board that did
not get named by the contestants number eight was still up for grabs in one
point and that was Super Troopers 2
this is where I evil laugh after each one I got them again
number six was a motion picture from 2017
I don't know what has made it perk up on the list
and get such a lofty spot
but it's called Super Dark Times
yeah exactly, nobody knows what that is get such a lofty spot, but it's called Super Dark Times.
Yeah, exactly.
Nobody knows what that is.
But if somebody pulled that out, it would have been pretty impressive.
It was 2017?
Mm-hmm.
Oh, I know what that's referring to.
She gets it.
And then... Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, now I get it.
Yes.
We're smart number four
this one is a real kick in the pants
I think for everybody
Super Mario Bros
hey The cartoon was played by a wrestler too
I knew you'd feel bad about not knowing it
But there we have it
And then number one
Let's see if any audience member could guess it.
The Super with Joe Pesci.
What was that?
I think I heard it.
Not Superman, strangely enough.
Not Batman v Superman.
No superheroes other than the DC League of Super Pets.
No, the number one i i think i've heard
people say it but it blends in because all you had to say was super i did say that
i kept begging you to get rid of that at the beginning of the super
stop talking about joe pesci and start talking about ray and wilson and it's a james gunn movie
it's real harsh but it is good.
It is a good movie.
And I guess people are looking it up because I think it just celebrated
a 20th anniversary
or something like that.
Some anniversary.
10th? 10th.
We'll say 10 years.
How was going on when you were like...
You were trying to tell me that was the answer, right?
I wasn't trying to tell you anything I am a host that keeps things
fair and yeah I mean as badly as I wanted and see no Dan to have the prize
bag I kept it all on the up and up. Didn't even give her the
DC Super Pets thing.
Didn't even give in on that, but she's gonna
win anyway.
So you gotta go first in doing your
plugs, Karina. What would you like to plug?
Okay.
I will be on Twitch
with Monster Pancake Theater, which Doug
joins sometimes. Yes're on the air.
Yes, love those guys and gals.
Twitch.tv slash Master Pancake Theater.
Next Thursday, we'll be making fun of Lone Star 911.
Live.
Yeah, that's got to be a good time.
Like, Rob Lowe still thinks he's doing comedies, right?
Like, why is he in that show?
Like, to me, he's just a comical character now.
It's weird to see him acting serious.
Or trying to.
Anyway.
Oh, I've never watched it. Calm down.
I eat Atkins bars sometimes.
He says those are delicious,
and he never has fucking had one.
When he goes, goes oh the lemon tart
fuck you
Rob Lowe there's no way you sit around
eating those lemon tart
Atkins things
well there's a sponsor we're not going to get on the show
Kevin Kevin, Hef, Kellum
what have you got to promote buddy?
you can hear me on my podcast
Sportskeeda Wrestling and I'm going to be at
Zadie's After Dark Show
Zadie's in Old Town in Chicago
on the 14th
I call that Old Town part of Chicago
I call that Chicago because I of Chicago I call that Chicago
because I've been around long enough
I guess, I don't know
but I had fun at Zany's
there the other night, last night
and Austin was in the audience
and he's the only person who brought a name tag
and you're not supposed to bring name tags
to stand up shows but I like it when people do
and he did
and so he and I played a game of last person standing.
And the audience member said Nicolas Cage.
And we went a lot. We did a lot of Nicolas Cage back and forth, like speed, fast version.
And I got him when I said kick-ass, and he said kick-ass too.
Oh, he stayed up all night thinking of more
Nick Cage movies would come to him.
But during the game itself, he did say
Captain Corelli's mandolin,
so the audience went apeshit for that.
So congratulations, Austin.
Can I step on your plugs, Hef?
Did you do them all?
Yeah, I did them all.
Okay, good, good.
And also, Colt Cabana, Hef? Did you do them all? Yeah, I did them all. I'm good. Okay, good, good.
And also, Colt Cabana, so great to see you again.
What do you want to promote at this time?
Last night I was on an episode of The Young Rock
as the Brooklyn Brawler.
Oh, that's right!
So you can watch that on Peacock or Hulu.
I went to Australia for seven weeks and I had two minutes of air time.
It was the greatest gig I've ever done.
And because of that, I've brought back, I do seasons of my podcast.
It's called The Art of Wrestling.
I talk to different wrestlers in the locker room.
And then I also have two other podcasts I do.
One is just a series. It's bingeable.
It's called Pro Wrestling Fringe. Weird stories about professional wrestling.
The other one is Wrestling Anonymous. It's a hotline
podcast where people call up anonymously.
There are weird stories about wrestling and I kind of
talk about them. Also, I'm also
on Twitch. Twitch.tv
slash Colt Cabana. And then
Instagram, TikTok, Twitter. It's all
at Colt Cabana. ColtCabana.com
ColtBirch.com
AEW Wrestling Ring of Honor.
Come watch me wrestle.
Thank you very much.
Watch how he gets all those pains that he has now
from diving off the side of the thing.
It's crazy. I want to come see it the thing. It's crazy.
I want to come see it live again.
Stand-up comedy and wrestling, I think,
are two things that, you know,
they can be really fun on TV,
but next level when you do it live.
Yeah, you came to watch me wrestle in Austin, I believe.
Oh, and Minnesota.
Yeah.
Big fan, Doug Benson.
Yeah, I went twice.
It's more of a timing thing than anything,
because we're just not in the same town at the same time very often.
But when it happens, I'm on it.
Hell yeah.
And that's why you were here tonight, because we were both in town,
and you reached out, and I appreciate you doing so.
Does anybody on stage, we'll go to the audience if on stage people don't
I failed to do my research and come up with the last line
from a movie to close out the show
tonight
does anybody on stage have a favorite
movie last line
I can sing a song
the last song in a movie
yup
because it's something I have to say is what I'm looking for. How long is this song?
I mean it closes out the movie.
Give us a little, give us a taste. Winner takes it all, loser takes a fall, Fight to the beginning of the end.
Yeah!
Alright, alright.
I'm just gonna say the last line
from Over the Top.
And it's not the actual last line.
It's what I imagined the last line
to be
from Over the Top.
Thank you to Zanies for top. Thank you to Zanies for hosting.
Thank you to Parkway Bank Park,
the best entertainment district
that's named after a bank
that's also a park in the world.
And one more time for my guests,
Karina Magyar,
Kevin F. Callum, time for my guests Karina Magyar Kevin
Kevin
Scott
as always
go wait in the car
now it's time for Doug to watch another
talkie
Isaac Cole is doing gross
makes him cocky
there's no room in his heart for you
cause Doug loves
movies
thanks everybody Thank you everybody!