Doug Loves Movies - Danny Jolles and Chad Opitz guest

Episode Date: February 21, 2022

Live from the Punch Line Comedy Club in Sacramento, Doug welcomes Danny Jolles and Chad Opitz to the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on Stitcher Premium. For a free ...month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming babies, sticky seeds with 50 azepam or kernels in his teeth. There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug loves movies! My name is Doug and I love movies! This is Doug Loves Movies! Wow, there's a little extra singing going on in that version. That was nice. Coming to you once again from one of my favorite clubs to do this thing, the Punchline in Sacramento, California!
Starting point is 00:00:48 The prize bag is a backpack that says, Fugitive, only on Quibi. So Quibi may be done, but this backpack can go home with somebody for the rest of their life, and they can always look back and try to remember what Quibi was. And then there's lots of other stuff including a um a bachelor uh calendar from 2021 so it's if you want to relive 2021 through uh that bachelor uh uh what was the black bachelor's name matt um uh that's in here and uh lots other stuff that i uh recorded a video of all of it on my um instagram if you want to go look and see
Starting point is 00:01:37 what's up for grabs because it's it's not that much fun to talk about on the podcast just a bunch of silly crap. But now it's time for everybody's favorite part of this show. Doug plugs. Doug Loves Movies is coming to Miami, Florida in April, Rosemont, Illinois in May, and more. I'm doing like one or two live ones in front of an audience a month. And for all my dates and deets, visit Douglovesmovies.com. That's Douglovesmovies.com.
Starting point is 00:02:11 Yeah. Woo-hoo. Wall-e. Shh. Can I dance? I ain't got to tell you, that was two for two for Sacramento. I gotta tell you, that's two for two for Sacramento. Great job, sack punch, because you know, since pandemic, the shows, the audience is a little shaky on both of those. I'm like, this is Douglas Reese. They're like, hi, Doug.
Starting point is 00:02:43 So thank you for being awesome and for being here and let's get my guests out here as you can see we have two chairs because this is going to be an intense competition today that's not why i just thought it'd be fun to do a two guest show and they are And they are two great guests. Please welcome them, Chad Obitz and Danny Jollis. I'm doing that in my stand-up more now, where when I hit the stage, I'll just start going like this. Because everyone will just start clapping more, and they sound like they're more excited,
Starting point is 00:03:35 even though you're just gesturing for them to do that. Let's meet these gentlemen individually, but not alphabetically. Yeah, that's right. All the way over there on the left, Chad Opitz is here, everybody. Hello. It says here that you're a Bay Area comedy phenom.
Starting point is 00:03:59 Yes, you've said that many times in during Sweetie, Doug. And that you do a mean somersault. I do. So maybe at some point during the show, we'll bust that out. Anything can happen. The Punchline in Sacramento and the Punchline in San Francisco have probably the only two stages in the world that are perfect for Chad Opitz to do somersaults on. It's almost like they built him for that.
Starting point is 00:04:20 Yeah. Because the stage is just high enough that you can just roll onto it. Yep. Yeah. I will say, I've done a show with you before, and you did do a somersault in that show. I did. I do remember that. What was that?
Starting point is 00:04:31 Did I do it on the grass, I think? It was a grass one. Yeah. If there's grass, I'm doing it. Right? It was a great somersault. You don't worry about stains? Nah.
Starting point is 00:04:40 Come on. I'm living life dangerously, dude. I mean, a man's got a somersault. Yeah, man. I was just watching a dating show back in the green room from the 2010s called Baggage. Yeah, you're right. That was the proper reaction.
Starting point is 00:05:01 Yeah, it's a silly show with Jerry Springer. Yeah, but somebody just said show with Jerry Springer. Yeah, but somebody just said something that reminded me of it, and I can't remember. Now I have no idea why. Oh, I do know, I do know. You mostly somersault on the weekends or during the week? What?
Starting point is 00:05:23 Because there's this guy in this show, Baggage. You have to say what your baggage is, why you'd be somebody that no one wants to date. And his baggage was that he only can date on weeknights. He can't go out on weekends. And the reason why is because he parkours on weekends with his buddies. And so he doesn't have time for fucking dating. That's true. And I feel like you'd fit in with him and his crowd with your somersaults.
Starting point is 00:05:46 Yeah, yeah. I don't think there's enough somersaults in parkour. I should put that in my dating bio. Yeah, I'd be like, nah, you gotta do weeknights because on the weekends I'm somersaulting. What about summer? Somersault summer. Good old winter salt.
Starting point is 00:06:03 I like it. Also joining us today, you may have seen him on television. Oh, boy. Stephen Colbert show. Are you kidding? It's a fantastic credit. Thank you so much. Yeah, and
Starting point is 00:06:19 I don't know about your somersaulting skills. It's not good. Okay, so let's not even get into it. Danny Jollis. Yeah. See? That's joke stealing. It's fucking gold.
Starting point is 00:06:38 That is gold. I'm going to do that more. Because I even said your name. I just said it. I didn't really give it that, like, everybody applaud now sound. But then we did the hands. I said to myself. It worked.
Starting point is 00:06:53 I knew it would. I had nothing but confidence. I'm going to do it at every show I do from now on. I feel very confident in it. And everyone's going to say, Doug started that. I'm going to say, no, he didn't. He stole that from me. And that'll be our feud.
Starting point is 00:07:04 I stole it from another guy, actually. Yeah. I saw another guy do it recently, and I was like, that is genius. Because he just went up on stage and just started going like this. So the crowd just started going more crazy. But then you saw that. It sounds like he's the best comic ever. But you saw that, though, and you said, hey, let me make this my own.
Starting point is 00:07:18 And then you went up here. And that's smarter. Right? Yeah. Oh, yeah, you're right. No, he'd do it like he's the guy who comes out and does that. Like he doesn't have comedy to follow it up. To me, this is more silly, and then I do some jokes.
Starting point is 00:07:35 But let me ask you this, Danny. Yeah. You're working here all weekend on the show with, it's a two-man show, you and Sam Murill, who's a frequent guest on this show. Sam Murill, incredible comic. Very funny. And so two shows tonight. Two shows tonight.
Starting point is 00:07:53 One tomorrow night. Two shows tomorrow night. What? The man sells tickets. Oh, he sure do. He sells tickets. Yeah. He's so funny.
Starting point is 00:08:00 I was already kind of wondering why he had a Sunday show, but now that makes sense because he's going to sell it. Because Monday's a holiday. I know. Monday's President's Day. Don't forget to get a mattress. Go right out here to Mattress Firm. The mattress store that will only have two or three customers at most.
Starting point is 00:08:23 Probably in the same family. families come down and just lay on the mattresses it really is one-stop shopping this mall i talk about it all the time because it's it's got the greatest name because the mall's called how about arden because it's on the corner of how and arden how about about Arden? Yeah, right? And they went with that for years and it never took off. I was the only person who enjoyed it. And then recently they're like, hashtag HBA.
Starting point is 00:08:53 So now it's just called HBA, which is the opposite of fun. How about Arden was so corny, but then they just used the initials from it and then nobody ever discussed it. To go further down the rabbit hole, tough. That's tough to hear. It's brutal.
Starting point is 00:09:08 That mattress store is taking up a lot of real estate here. It really is. It's big. The second floor of this building is the punchline and a mattress store. The mattress store could seat 300, I would say. Yeah. It's a 300-seater. But every time I play this club, I'm like, damn, good for cupcake craving.
Starting point is 00:09:27 I don't know how you still exist. I don't know what kind of front you're running. No one ever goes in. No one ever comes out. It's just a bunch of Oompa Loompas in there making cupcakes. Well, before we get to the... Thanks for being here, guys. Before we get to the game portion of the show,
Starting point is 00:09:49 a thing I've been doing lately is asking for movie recommendations from my guests. Or for my guests. Which movies would you guys like to recommend for yourselves to see? No, which movie... We'll start with Chad Opitz.
Starting point is 00:10:05 Please recommend one movie, Chad. It could be any, not even something I've seen recently. It could be any, it's just basically recommending a movie. It's a tough question because it's a lot of pressure. It is a lot of pressure.
Starting point is 00:10:17 I'm going to go with a very... What if somebody watches it and hates it? They're going to be mad at you. And they probably will. Because this is the 1988 cult classic starring peter weller and sam elliott called shakedown yeah and the tagline is whatever you do don't call the cops police corruption got a team up of robocop and fucking dalton from roadhouse come on i mean that's one way to describe him He's been in a lot of movies Holy shit
Starting point is 00:10:45 It's a great film Shakedown I think I did see and like that movie What is it like 80s? 88 Sam Elliott's the one in 1883 What's that? Anybody? 1883? Is that Sam Elliott?
Starting point is 00:11:01 Is anybody watching 1883? Yeah he's so good in 1887. So good. Isn't he from Sacramento? 1883, I think. Is Sam Elliott from Sacramento? What a terrible name for a show. Just some old year.
Starting point is 00:11:17 You know, they have to say a prequel story to Yellowstone. They have to mention that right after saying 1833, because 1833 doesn't mean shit. Did I say it right that time? Yes. Oh, damn it. Well, it's a great show. I hear it's great.
Starting point is 00:11:32 I don't like Westerns. Well, then you won't love it, because I'll tell you, Sam Elliott's voice is gone. And he is a, he is. It is? I mean, he's just like, every line every line i mean i'm a bad impressionist but if i were to do a simile right now every line is like well you never know what they're gonna get around to get this well you're just doing sling blade that's just sling blade no no
Starting point is 00:11:56 he's slim it's like it's that was billy moore words maybe the words are having a hard time getting past his mustache i'm telling literally just a sling blade. It's a real word blocker, that mustache. Every line he gives. He's like trying to get it out the side. He's like, I only chill for pre-chewed beef now.
Starting point is 00:12:20 Sam, you've got a milk mustache. It's my mustache. Always looks like a milk mustache. It's my mustache. Always looks like a milk mustache. You're careful with that milk. You get too much milk in your mustache. You know, get around a good 2%. See, now I got to watch this show. It sounds great.
Starting point is 00:12:41 Yeah, and he has to like shout orders to all the other people out on the prairie. So it's just a lot of round up the wagon. That's TV. We're not here to talk about TV. Doug hates TV. I hate TV. I've been meaning to start a podcast, Doug hates TV.
Starting point is 00:13:03 Doug hates TV. But, you know, TV is where you can see a lot of movies so I gotta give in to the TV and they're making movies that seem like series and series that seem like movies and then the ads you don't know the difference like when you look at the posters like
Starting point is 00:13:18 is this a movie is this a series is this a limited series fucking the new Kanye West movie on Netflix? They're calling it a series of three 90-minute movies. Fuck off! That's not a series. That's just
Starting point is 00:13:33 an abomination. He made a Lord of the Rings. Why don't you just make a two-hour documentary about yourselves? There's no way that it should be three hours. Or, you know, however long 90 minutes three times is.
Starting point is 00:13:53 I'm not here to do math. I'm not here to talk about TV. Danny, please recommend a movie. Well, I will say that I went to do it because a friend was in it but i will say the new scream i think is so good and i really think everybody should go see it because i really think like it is one of the few franchise like revivals that i've seen in a while where i've been like
Starting point is 00:14:20 yeah that's how you do it that's it i don't know if anybody here has seen it. Not a big pop from the crowd, but I stand by it. I'm getting bigger and bigger with it. But yeah, no, it's great. Yeah, yeah. You guys are my table. This table over here is like the only people watching things that are good. People. Oh, well, this lady wants to have a chat with you about this. I will. here is like the only people watching things that are good. People, oh.
Starting point is 00:14:48 Whoa, this lady wants to have a chat with you about this. I will. I'll have a chat with you all day. A love letter to Wes Craven. Wes Craven was awesome and this all sounds great because I have been when horror movies come out
Starting point is 00:15:02 people will, there's a certain faction that will rave about them even when they're shitty horror movies come out, people will, there's a certain faction that will rave about them, even when they're shitty horror movies. It's the one genre where like, if someone loves that genre, their favorite movies in that genre are probably stuff I don't want to see. You know what I mean? It's a tricky genre.
Starting point is 00:15:20 And like, people have been saying that they stuck the landing and that they made that they made a good reboot of scream so i am gonna watch it but i've just been like just hearing that people think it's good isn't enough for me for a horror movie because i got especially during the pandemic i must have watched i must have slept through 30 horror movies you know we turn on a horror movie on uh you, you know, on Netflix or, you know, on streaming of some kind. And then, uh, you know, the description will say slow burn,
Starting point is 00:15:52 right? Yeah. She made that noise again. And, uh, that's the sound of a slow burn. Uh, you know, and I, you know, and it's always like like it's felt like every other movie in the pandemic was two or three actors you know because it's easier to shoot with under the pandemic guidelines or whatever the safety guidelines but uh and then also just one location so every other movie that came out during that year was uh you know two or three people go to a place shit starts to happen there how quickly it starts to happen varies sometimes it could be the whole movie and nothing ever happens the slowest of burns um i did a movie that took
Starting point is 00:16:41 place in one house the entire time yeah let. Let me tell you, you became aware as an audience member at a certain point that we never left that house, but I did an entire movie in one location. It is such a, it is brutal. What's it called? Blowing up right now on Amazon prime. Sweet little movie,
Starting point is 00:16:56 a little rom-com. If you like rom-coms right down the middle and you're expecting a big twist or anything like that don't worry about it but if you want all the beats of a rom-com
Starting point is 00:17:09 with my stupid face then I do recommend it and but it's all in one house we filmed it in one house in like two weeks blowing up right now oh
Starting point is 00:17:16 oh everyone in this room thought you were just bragging about how it's doing wow no that's a hilarious title no this room thought you were just bragging about how it's doing. Wow. That's a hilarious title.
Starting point is 00:17:30 Nobody saw it, to be clear. Holy shit. Yeah, because when you say the title everyone's like, well, he never told us what it was. Yeah. In retrospect. This is some strange marketing he's employing. It's the biggest movie of all time. I'll tell you a few more things about it,
Starting point is 00:17:46 but let's not worry about titles. Let's not label this. Oh. How many other characters are in this one house? So there's people who visit the house. There's visitors, but it's me and the girl just run around this house. And then we have a couple of visitors throughout. And then we do a, it's a tight little movie.
Starting point is 00:18:14 Who's the actress that plays? Sujata Day, who has a movie called Definition Please on Netflix. Oh, I hear that's blowing up. Right now. Right now. now yeah yeah it's blowing up right now so in the movie what's that a ref what's that title a reference to just things are happening yeah yeah yeah shit's popping off was an alternate title you couldn't use yeah you know things are not going great, if you can believe it, and
Starting point is 00:18:47 things continue to escalate in a funny rom-com way. Well, alright. But Scream is the one I recommend. I just want to go back to that. I did not recommend my own movie. I was pushed into this hole. Alright, so I'm going to recommend a movie because since there's only two guests,
Starting point is 00:19:11 I like to have three titles to throw on my Twitter account, the I Love Movies. Doug Loves Movies Twitter account. That was the old school title for the show back 15 years ago. All right. So Chad recommended Shakedown. I'm trying to be strategic about my recommendation today because I like to win. There's a lot of steak here.
Starting point is 00:19:35 Yeah. It's so high stakes, as is everything I do, because I love being high and eating steaks. I wish I didn't spend most of the day so nervous about losing this game and being humiliated on this stage. I'm so nervous about it. Isn't that weird? Because it's so silly.
Starting point is 00:19:53 Just have fun with it. I was like, this podcast is going to be forever of me being an idiot. And then I said, blowing up right now, and I wasn't clear. All right, so my recommendation, since we've got a horror movie and a shakedown movie, I don't even know what genre to put it in.
Starting point is 00:20:18 Action. I'm going to go with a musical. Yes. Called Tick, Tick, Boom. Have you seen it? That hand raising to get him to clap almost didn't work. Because I asked a question where the answer for a lot of the people is no. So then why would they follow it up with some applause?
Starting point is 00:20:44 But I'm going Tick, Tick, Boom. I'll see how it does against Scream and Shaked with some applause? But I'm going tick, tick, boom. I'll see how it does against Scream and Shakedown. Not well, I'm going to assume. But it's just a terrific musical. I think Andrew Garfield should win Best Actor for his performance in it. But it's, you know, it's a love letter
Starting point is 00:20:59 to Jonathan Larson and musicals. And so, I think you have to be into those things to love it, but give it a try. It's a good movie. And thank you, both of you guys, for visiting Recommendation Nation. You know what?
Starting point is 00:21:19 That applause, I got to tell the listeners, that one just happened. We didn't do anything. We're just sitting here. You know what? Tick, tick, boom sounds like a prequel to Blowing Up Right Now. Right.
Starting point is 00:21:35 I mean, tick, tick, boom is one of the most obnoxious titles when it comes to lowercase letters and punctuation. There's way too much going on. Is there like dot dot dot something? Yes. Yeah, it's got an ellipsis in there. It's just silly. But a terrific movie.
Starting point is 00:21:55 Okay. So, let's go to a break. And while we're in the break, we'll pick some name tags and we come back, we'll play some games. We'll be right back. Woo! We're in the break. We'll pick some name tags, and when we come back, we'll play some games. We'll be right back. We're back! We had a lot of fun picking name tags,
Starting point is 00:22:24 and Chad ended up with one that I actually posted on my socials. It's a gentleman who I assume is named Andy. Dropped the C off a candy man and went with Andy man. Great job, Chad. I will say, great job, Chad. Great job, Chad. That guy made a name tag. And you did a great job. It took me a while.
Starting point is 00:22:39 And then over here, Danny is going to play for, this is her full name, Kiana Edge of Tomorrow. Never dies. Never dies. Oh, yeah. I guess I should have said all of it. Or I could repeat it. Yes.
Starting point is 00:22:57 Or die. Or live. All right. Did I mention that we're back? Yes, I did. Did I mention that we're back? Yes, I did. The first game we're going to play today,
Starting point is 00:23:14 it's blowing up all over the place. Woo! Because it's called Who Has My Pig? Nicholas Cage made a terrific movie that got no Oscar recognition. Shameful. It's called Pig. He plays a man who's looking for his pig. In this game, I will play Nicolas Cage and I will harass a celebrity
Starting point is 00:23:47 about whether or not they have my pig and you gentlemen guess until somebody gets it what celebrity Nicolas Cage is accusing of having his pig.
Starting point is 00:24:04 Hell yeah. What a straightforward easy game. Yeah. There will be clues in what he's saying. Okay. It's not just going to be this cage ranting
Starting point is 00:24:22 and you just guess celebrities until you get lucky. Yeah. I guess the whole time you're just like, you piece of shit, where's my pig? Mel Brooks?
Starting point is 00:24:29 Hey, what? All right, here we go. Here's round one. Do you have my pig? Your name means to give thanks. I sure would think that if you gave me back my pig, then your name would be appropriate for me.
Starting point is 00:25:04 Much better than Michi. If you have my pig, I'm going to be euphoria-ic. Zendaya. Zendaya is correct. Zendaya is Michi. Oh, man. What a journey.
Starting point is 00:25:22 Or Zendaya. Thank you very much. Zendaya, Zendaya, you very much Zendaya Zendaya Let's call the whole thing off What am I I do love the idea Of Zendaya Stealing Nicolas Cage's pig
Starting point is 00:25:32 That would be amazing You say Zendaya I say Zendaya Zendaya Zendaya Fuck you Suck it I feel like I lost track
Starting point is 00:25:44 Of the words. Is that from Tick, Tick, Boom? Yeah, I should say that I like that musical because all the songs could have been written by me. They're really terrible. All right, so who ended up saying that first, Danny? Danny's on the board. Danny's got one point.
Starting point is 00:26:09 It is so heartbreaking on the stage seeing people whisper to each other when you're not even close uh don't look at them everyone in the audience is better at these games than the people on stage not it not everybody i take it back but a lot of you are. Like every time I pull an audience member up to play against my comedy friends, they don't do very well. The audience members, they tend to be shyer and less funny, but they are better at the games.
Starting point is 00:26:38 Because they actually listen to the show. Most of my guests never listen to it. I don't listen to it. All right, here we go. Do you have my pig? Is my pig frozen? Or is he in a good place? Ted Danson?
Starting point is 00:26:59 Kristen Bell? That is correct! Kristen Bell! Hell yeah. This is quite a mystery, Veronica. Or should I call you the woman in the house at the window by the street?
Starting point is 00:27:23 Anyway. I would have gotten it by there, for sure. So who got it that time? Danny again. Danny again? Yeah. It's crushing. Oh, because, yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:32 Because Chad went Ted Danson. Don't know what the hell I was thinking. Yeah. That's just going to happen. That's what's going to happen. Frozen really, really teed it up. Yeah, right? First clue doesn't give it away
Starting point is 00:27:47 but you know gets you in the neighborhood usually we'll see about how this next one goes how many do I have to win to win um
Starting point is 00:27:54 first person to 40 okay you're at two and I mean I mean age we're gonna play until both of you are 40
Starting point is 00:28:02 woo hoo do you have my pig? You're my favorite Spider-Man. Andrew Garfield. Even though you don't seem Dutch. Tobey Maguire? All right, so then Tom Holland. Tom Holland is correct!
Starting point is 00:28:30 I love that they're just like, come on, the only other option. Well, there's a third. Do you think everyone with the name Holland is Dutch, or that's just... Oh, that's where Dutch was coming from. I got it now. Dutch did nothing, but I was like...
Starting point is 00:28:44 Me neither, yeah. And I was thinking of 1883, so I was like, Dutch is the name, I believe it now. Dutch did nothing. Me neither. And I was thinking of 1883, so I was like, Dutch is the name, I believe, of one of the characters in that show. I was like, I heard that. Dutch. And so I was thinking about that, but I was like, well, he's not in Spider-Man. Yeah, I mean, it was narrowed down immediately to three people, right?
Starting point is 00:29:01 Three Spider-Mans? Or I guess you could do Into the Spider-Verse, The guy who played Miles would count, I guess. But anyway. Sadly, I don't know his name. Alright. I'm just going to do one more. And the audience knows
Starting point is 00:29:18 what that means. But my guests on stage do not. Here we go. Let's see who gets this first. Do you have my pig, Penelope Cruz? Penelope Cruz? That is correct. I was going to say Salma Hayek.
Starting point is 00:29:37 Fuck. That's racist. That is my favorite part of that game. Every time the last one is just the person, I just say the person's name. And watching the guest take a beat like, is that a clue? Why is he calling her Penelope Cruz? It must be Penelope Cruz.
Starting point is 00:29:55 I know. That must be the answer. I was so terrified that there was a biopic about Penelope Cruz that I hadn't heard of. But there wasn't. It was just Penelope Cruz. And that's a recap of what just happened. And that was me.
Starting point is 00:30:10 Did you know what you win for winning that game, Danny? I sure don't. You get to go first in our next game. Oh. Right. Which might not even be beneficial. It still feels good. I think it's going to work out. Let's play
Starting point is 00:30:31 Whose Tagline Is It Anyway? First time I ever played this game was right here in Sacramento. It's something I just said that I cannot confirm. I will... I just said that I cannot confirm. I will... I just... I was like in a lie, so why lie? It might have been
Starting point is 00:30:54 created here. I don't know. I don't know which games were created here, but I've been here a lot of times under this weird dusk moon. Right? Because there's a sunset going on, so that's not the sun. It's just a moon. These light up, turn to little stars.
Starting point is 00:31:11 Yeah, little stars. It's beautiful. It's one of the most beautiful backdrops. And if either of us fall back in our chair, we will ruin it. So be careful, everybody. A lot of responsibility up here. With great responsibility comes great Dutchness. All right, so I'll read a tagline from a motion picture.
Starting point is 00:31:31 Some motion pictures have several. Some motion pictures have terrible taglines that are poorly written. A lot of them do. But I'll say the tagline from the poster from whatever that I gather from IMDB, and then, Danny, you get to go first. I'll say the tagline to you. You get one guess. Just Danny, nobody else.
Starting point is 00:32:00 If he misses it, Chad gets a guess. Nobody else. If he misses it, we gets a guess. Nobody else. If he misses it, we go, we start with that gentleman over there and work our way around the entire room. And when an audience member gets it right, they replace someone on stage.
Starting point is 00:32:19 It's like a fucking reality show now. Baggage. Yeah. Alright, so It's like a fucking reality show now. Baggage. Yeah. All right. So here's the first tagline. Ooh, also, I got to tell Danny this. Oh, I don't have to tell Danny this, because he listens to the show. I'll tell Chad.
Starting point is 00:32:37 Ooh, Chad. Chad. Good God. A theme is at play in all of these taglines. A theme is at play in all of these taglines. So once you figure that out, then you're really off and running. I mean, it's a tough game, so don't beat yourself up if you don't have the answer. Danny, what movie had the tagline, An offer you can't refuse?
Starting point is 00:33:07 Really? I can't refuse. Really? I don't know. Well. Don't make Danny feel bad. With your snickering and your muttering. It does feel as if this could be an embarrassing
Starting point is 00:33:26 guess, but it seems so obvious that I'm just going to say it. Is it The Godfather? That is correct. Okay. It just seems so obvious that I was like,
Starting point is 00:33:43 it can't be that. Yeah, I was shocked that you weren't like, weren't acting like you knew exactly what it was. Yeah. It could have been a trick. It could have been a trick. But also, I try to pause. I think that's also a key to this game. Take a second.
Starting point is 00:33:54 Bravo. Thank you. If he didn't get it, I was going to say indecent proposal. Ooh, that would have been a good guess. That's not it, though. I mean, that's a better offer than the one in The Godfather. I know! That's what I was thinking.
Starting point is 00:34:15 That there's any drama in a movie where a guy just wants to have sex with a lady for a million dollars and her boyfriend's mad about it. He's just like, come on, suck it up, It's a mill. Get over it, Woody Harrelson. Robert Redford's handsomer than me. Maybe that's why he was upset.
Starting point is 00:34:36 All right, so Danny, you're on the board. You got one. Chad gets to go first in this next one. Chad, what movie do you think had the tagline murderers come with smiles? Murderers
Starting point is 00:34:53 come with smiles? Why would anyone be like, oh, I want to see that. Murderers come with smiles. I hope they bring something else like, you know, some flowers or candy. Murderers come with smiles. I hope they bring something else, like, you know, some flowers or candy. Murderers come with smiles. Baby geniuses.
Starting point is 00:35:19 No. No idea. No audience guesses, please. Danny. Are you a real guest? Yeah, I don't know. No idea. No audience guesses, please. Danny. Are you a real guest? Yeah, I don't know. All right, I mean, this is wrong, but I'm just going to start narrowing it down a little bit.
Starting point is 00:35:32 Well, wait, you said there's a theme. Oh. Joe confirmation back there. Yup. It didn't feel like the nicest yup. He did say that. As heckles go go it was very pleasant it was pleasant but it also had a real feel
Starting point is 00:35:48 of like we covered this idiot knew one thing the guy's in a hurry to go buy a mattress with that said I don't really know what to do with the theme but I'm just going to knock it out. I'm just going to say it out of the gate. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:36:08 The first one or the second one? First one? Because it's neither. Oh. But that made me feel good and thank you for doing that. That's fine. That's fine. This one was stupid.
Starting point is 00:36:22 Like, it fits the theme, but I was just like, I can't even understand why this would be the tagline for this movie. Supposedly, that was one of the taglines for Goodfellas. Murderers come with smiles? Not a lot of smiling in that movie. Well, Pesci seems happy most of the time. I'm pretty sure he specifically doesn't like being a clown. That is true.
Starting point is 00:36:46 That is a good point. All right, so nobody got a point on that one. All right, I almost gave you the point, Danny, just because that was so funny. Oh, thanks. Yeah, all right, but Danny's up first this time, right? Yeah. No, wait, Chad's up first again.
Starting point is 00:37:06 I apologize to everyone concerned. You're doing so good. Chad? Yes? What movie had the tagline, All the power on Earth can't change destiny? All the power on Earth can't change destiny. Yeah, I guess I probably read into that too dramatically.
Starting point is 00:37:29 All the power on earth can't change destiny. Okay, so we got... That's how it should be read. All the power on earth... There we go. Cannot change destiny. Cannot change destiny. Okay, the first one was Godfather.
Starting point is 00:37:44 The second one was Goodfellas. Yup. All the power. This one is Godfellas. I don't know. All the power on earth. Cannot change destiny? What the fuck?
Starting point is 00:38:00 Someone just came to a realization. Is it Kundun? Someone just came to a realization. Is it Kundun? Spelled K-U-N-D-U-N. Yeah. Some Scorsese 1997 film. Are you out of your mind? I'm very smart in very stupid ways.
Starting point is 00:38:23 All right, well, Kundun is not the answer. Nah. I've got no idea. Danny, would you like to hear it again? Yeah. All the power on earth can't change destiny. She is about a lady named Destiny, and she refuses to change. Look at how powerful you are.
Starting point is 00:38:50 Yeah. All the movies. So it's going to be wrong, but I'm going to just say a Pacino movie to say a Pacino movie, because I think that's the trend. And even though my instinct says... Hey, real quick,
Starting point is 00:39:02 just to remind you, Pacino's not in Goodfellas. Woo, Danny! I mean, I didn't want him to... The theme could still be Pacino, like movies I wish Pacino was in. Yeah. Because that movie definitely needs somebody
Starting point is 00:39:21 to walk in and go, ha, ha, ha! Over the top, that's me! In that case, we're going to change our answer to The Many Saints of Newark. Oh, that is a great guess. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:39:42 That is a terrific guess. Doesn't feel right. It fits the theme, but you know what fits the theme even better? The Godfather Part 2. Oh, my God. Damn. This next one is one of the bleakest taglines I've ever seen or read. And Chad goes first again.
Starting point is 00:40:13 Time changes nothing. That's what's trying to get you to come see a motion picture, are the words, time changes nothing. Back to the future. I guess that's their way of saying when you come out of the movie, you won't have missed anything. Everything will be the same. That's your guess?
Starting point is 00:40:37 No. I'm going to say Godfather 3. Godfather Part 3. I thought you wouldn't fall for that sort of trickery time changes nothing what is it incorrect
Starting point is 00:40:52 Scorsese Danny absolutely what I was going to go with glad I could glad you ran into that one so much salted you went into that one so much salt did you weigh right into it so then um
Starting point is 00:41:08 oh boy oh boy oh boy I mean I don't know there's no sequel to that that's time changing you could do Saints of Newark again I know but I don't think it is Saints of Newark so I'm gonna go
Starting point is 00:41:24 even though I don't know why this tagline would make any sense for this movie, it fits the trend. I'm going to go with Casino. Yeah, that is a terrific guess again. You're a great guesser. But you'd be a winner if you said The Irishman.
Starting point is 00:41:40 Oh. And they have to say Time Changes Nothing because that fucking movie is way too long yeah that's that's the length of three Kanye I guess time changes nothing if you can afford to do special effects that make you look young again Bobby D and Joey Pesh I hated that movie I mean those blue eyes those fake blue eyes they put on De Niro were startling. Those who have seen it, no. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:42:11 Those who have seen it. Those who have seen it, no. Blue eyes. They know that time changes nothing. Yeah. Time changes nothing, and we were about five years away from the technology to make that thing look great. But with that said, I enjoyed it. I really did.
Starting point is 00:42:29 A subtle peshy, you never get that. Let's do another round. Okay, great. Oh, apparently you haven't seen Goin' Fishin'. Oh, yeah. Gone Fishin', thank you. Or Eight Heads in a Duffel Bag. We've seen Eight Heads in a Duffel bag. Just eight heads in a duffel bag.
Starting point is 00:42:47 Here's the next one. Chad's first again. Oh, Jesus. Because you guys haven't got any for a while. Shameful. Damn. I knew this would be an intense competition today. I just didn't know what kind of intense.
Starting point is 00:42:59 I would like to remind everyone the first game I actually did pretty good. You did. You really did. You destroyed the first game, but that's how time works, is now we're in this game. Yeah. Things aren't going so good. And now time changes nothing. Chad, what movie had the tagline, He Loved the American Dream? He Loved the American Dream.
Starting point is 00:43:24 Mm-hmm. Oh, my God. Okay, let's do a rundown. We got Godfather. We got Goodfellas. We got Godfather 2. What was the last one? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:43:38 Oh, the Irishman. Okay, he loved the American dream. God damn. Okay, he loved The American Dream. God damn. It's got to be one of them newfangled gangster films, don't it? Right? They've all been Scorsese movies.
Starting point is 00:43:58 Casino. Danny just guessed that on one of the other ones. Yeah, but that was a different tagline. Turns out you were both wrong. We are? Oh! What do you got for me, Danny? Bring it home, Danny. Come on, Danny.
Starting point is 00:44:15 Oh, boy, oh, boy. It's not good in my brain right now. Danny, Danny. Danny. Danny, Danny, Danny. Such a supportive crowd for such a dumb person. You can't even imagine the way I talk about myself when I'm alone. He said blowing up right now wasn't clear enough. He dirty text himself.
Starting point is 00:44:40 Stupid. It's not going gonna happen for us so i'm just gonna say no and i so appreciate it you're gonna love this answer when you hear it i know i'm gonna i mean it's so embarrassing what's going through my brain right now as i rack it for one final second before i just go and say the italian job which is wrong the italian job hell yeah which one the statham and most deaf one was a remake there's technically mafia in that movie they technically came from italy um the answer is scarface all right this is gonna get really fun now because in anticipation of this sort of thing happening oh i did get a point you did you did you did know what an offer you can't refuse is from but chad this one spells it out a little bit more
Starting point is 00:45:49 so we'll see how how you do with that okay a comedy about a government i love a tagline it's just a long description of the thing. A comedy about a government witness who gives suburbia a culture shock. A comedy about a witness who gives suburbia a culture shock? Yeah, that's what I said, but I pronounced it more clearly. Okay. I pronounced it more clearly. Okay. This is a deep cut one, but I was probably wrong, but I'm going to say My Blue Heaven. That is correct.
Starting point is 00:46:38 Chad, you did it. You're on the board. We have a tie. Out of nowhere. Congratulations. There's still one more game to play after this one. This one is just for fun, basically. You'll get to go first in the next game if you win this one,
Starting point is 00:46:58 but it's never really an advantage. Sometimes a disadvantage. All right, here we go. Danny. Luck has nothing to do with the games they play. I see you taking a second.
Starting point is 00:47:30 Just say it. Just say it. I know. I'm so terrified. Because let me say this. I want to say casino, but I know I'm going to get yelled at. So instead. All right, fine. All right, I'm going to get yelled at. So instead... Alright, fine.
Starting point is 00:47:46 I'm going with a casino. That is correct. I was going to say Fifty Shades of Grey. Well, congratulations. With two points on the board, Danny wins that game. Feels really good. But Chad's not out. We may see him somersault yet before the day is out.
Starting point is 00:48:20 That's what I'm boiling down to. That's what you win if you win the opportunity to somersault for all of us. And also, this is so exciting, someone today in the audience might win $400.
Starting point is 00:48:39 What? I know. It's crazy. The next one, if everybody fails today to come up with the name, then the next show, the prize money will be $4.20. No, it'll be $420.
Starting point is 00:48:56 I'm adding $20 every time somebody doesn't get this, and we will play that game right after this break. We'll be right back. And we're back. Yeah. It is time for last person standing. It is called Last Person Standing
Starting point is 00:49:30 because I switched it to person when I started using actresses more in this game. And then I switched it over to just actresses. So there's an actress's name in my wallet. And if somebody yes and if somebody names it today they will win $400 cash
Starting point is 00:49:51 and even though I'm not into contact I will count the money out into your hand like Chuck Woolery used to do on Scrabble and remember luck has nothing to do with the games that we play. Hold it.
Starting point is 00:50:12 Alright, so who thinks they have a suggestion of an actress that the three of us I play along in this game will have to take turns naming movies they were in until all of us run out. There's a game involved in this? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:50:26 Oh, okay. Yeah. I mean, we're going to, you know, we've got to get the names first. But I should remind you that we're looking for actresses where you can name a lot of movies they were in. Because that's the point of the game. And that's why we get four names. Because a lot of times the first or second name, all of us look at each other on stage like well i'm not gonna be able to name very many movies from that i don't i mean i know you know i mean like tilda swinton comes up everybody goes white to match her complexion
Starting point is 00:50:56 all right so all right so um andy man is with you and his name tag got chosen, so I'm not going to call on you immediately, because you're already in play for what's probably at least $40 worth of stuff in that bag. So we have to go to you. First of all, I'll ask your name and then what your suggestion is. So you don't have to hold up your name tag. What's your name? Jamie. Jamie?
Starting point is 00:51:24 Yes. With an M? so it's spelled MJ hey and what's your suggestion Jennifer Lawrence is not in my wallet but is a terrific name for this game. It's a great name. Yeah. We will have fun with that one. Are you guys... Wait, who'd you say? Jennifer Lawrence. As soon as I wrote J-L,
Starting point is 00:52:02 I was like, lo? Nope. J-Law. We're going J-L, I was like, lo? Nope, J-Law. We're going J-Law. But of course, we're going to get another name. Welcome back, Andy man. Oh, also, I think you missed the part about it's going to be ladies only. Your name tag's in play, so you can't play. How about you? What's your name?
Starting point is 00:52:25 Melissa. Melissa, what do you think? Chloe Grace Moretz. Oh, Chloe Grace Moretz. That's a pretty good one. Not in my wallet. Terrific actress, though. Very talented.
Starting point is 00:52:37 And one of the four we will be playing today. I felt like you were going to not get through that whole name. You were like starting to panic, like you didn't know the rest of it. Chloe, Grace. You think it's stuff for you guys. I don't even know. You get a little taste of what it's like up here.
Starting point is 00:52:59 Sometimes Scarface doesn't come right to your brain, and you know. There are so many men with their hands up right now, but, you know, you never know. I might change my mind on that stance. The last show in San Diego, I was like, all right, let's ask a man, and he gave the dumbest answer of any of them,
Starting point is 00:53:17 so it was very frustrating. The kind of polka-dotty outfit, what's your name? Julia. Classic. I thought she said Chilia. the kind of polka dotty outfit what's your name? Julia I thought she said Chilia and I was like that sounds like a new Taco Bell item Julia what is your suggestion?
Starting point is 00:53:37 Brie Larson a former guest on Douglas movies will probably never do it again now that she's Captain fucking Marvel. But also not in my wallet. Yeah. Sorry. You like her, Danny?
Starting point is 00:53:54 She's very talented. This is me just trying to build up a list of names. Oh, yeah. You're already getting into the game. Are you doing that too, Chad? Yeah. It sucks, though, because when they're in your head, they jump out. You get some.
Starting point is 00:54:12 I have literally nothing. It's a problem. We're a little concerned up here. But we're bringing a good attitude, and we're keeping a fun, happy. I've already forgotten who you said, Julia. Oh, yeah. Former guest. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:54:32 No, we talked about it plenty for me to remember. Yet somehow I still didn't. Okay. So we've been getting four every time lately. But then in San Diego, we got six fucking names. And still still we still damn we'll be here for like eight hours it's unfair to the next city if i just go nuts one time and just do so many names that eventually you get it right but i also worry you still won't
Starting point is 00:54:59 eventually get it right it's such a weird it's so weird to me that nobody said this name that's in my wallet. So let's go to what's your name? You got like a wristband on? They all have wristbands on. Lindsay? Yeah. Denim I guess? You wearing denim? Okay. Lindsay and denim.
Starting point is 00:55:20 Julia Roberts? Come on! What the fuck is happening? Oh. Oh. Please, I don't want to believe you. Yes. No, yeah, you're right about her being in a lot of movies. I agree that I don't understand why you're being yelled at right now.
Starting point is 00:55:33 Yeah. How dare you say Julia Roberts. Oh, it's just been, it's so frustrating because they say Julia Roberts like every second. It comes up a lot. Like these are all names. Chloe Grace Moretz. I give her credit for that one. But the idea is it's not, you're not looking for a name that's obscure.
Starting point is 00:55:53 This is a massive actress. Like Oscar nominated, like very well known. Very well known. Yeah, unlike Julia Roberts. And this has been going on for two years and nobody says her goddamn name. What's your name? Jama? Jana, like banana.
Starting point is 00:56:14 Well, then why isn't it Janana? I'm sorry for pointing for so long. All right. So, you know, this game's going to take forever for us to play with all these actresses who've been in a million things. You've got to do more than four, though. We're going to do Jana. Jana Banana. Like banana.
Starting point is 00:56:33 I really want some of the work. What's your suggestion? Scarlet Joaquin Phoenix. Yeah, these are people that, it's just the same names keep coming up. And that also shows what's wrong with Hollywood and movies is that there's not enough actresses. People know. Yeah, please don't yell out any more answers. I can't take more
Starting point is 00:56:55 because this just becomes unfair to the next city. Okay, one more. One more. I want to end this so fucking bad. Stand up if you know what name it is. Wait. I should go around and have them all whisper it in my ear. And then just declare the one who said it a winner.
Starting point is 00:57:18 But I don't want to. That's too much. That's too much. I love the dancing over here. What's your name? My name too much. I love the dancing over here. What's your name? My name? Lucy. Hi Lucy. My name? Like you were dancing when I said I like the dancing.
Starting point is 00:57:37 And why do you think you know the answer, Lucy? Because you're in Sacramento. Because I'm in Sacramento, that is a good point. I am in Sacramento. What? Who is it? Amy Adams! That is correct! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!
Starting point is 00:57:54 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Starting point is 00:58:03 Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Starting point is 00:58:03 Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Starting point is 00:58:04 Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Lucy, please approach the stage.
Starting point is 00:58:13 Oh. Look at her dance. Look at her dance. Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! No, that's, you did what I hoped would happen. I hope this would happen in Sacramento. Hold your hand up, please. 100, 200, 300. Now the real bills. 320, 340, 360 $380, $400! Lucy did it!
Starting point is 00:59:11 Congratulations. Is that what you wanted to say? Yes. I'm glad that that worked out because you were seeming like you might... Oh, what? How much did you give her?
Starting point is 00:59:35 What did you give her? 20? Okay. That's still very nice of her. So nice. That was very cool of you. I don't give away hundreds to see them passed off to other people. Wow. so nice that was very cool I don't give away hundreds to see them passed off to other people wow Lucy's I love that you
Starting point is 00:59:50 got 20 bucks and you didn't know the answer wow who were you gonna say Diane Keaton yeah
Starting point is 00:59:56 she's come up but that would have been a good one but but Amy oh yeah you gave her
Starting point is 01:00:04 20 dollars for no reason. But... But... Give it to the waitstaff. Yeah, you can tip with it. Definitely tip, everybody. I appreciate the staff coming in early. There's still two more pack shows tonight here at the club.
Starting point is 01:00:21 So tip well. Oh, my God. And a lot. If you have $400 in cash on on you put it on the table that's how i do it um so yeah lucy figured out the puzzle because in sacramento several years ago you knew we're at the show lucy when it happened uh i was playing a game where there was only one answer and an audience member yelled it out and it was amy adams like yelled it out in a way where it's just like that's the answer you know like if people somebody yelled out casino at the right moment tonight but it was also a game without multiple questions a game i don't play anymore but anyway
Starting point is 01:01:01 uh so when she yelled out amy Adams, I kind of lost my shit. And so then when I had this idea to pick a person, I thought, well, she'll come up every once in a while because people think it's funny to mention her to me. Like, people are always making Amy Adams jokes to me. Like, if I say anything
Starting point is 01:01:20 about her, they act like I should hate her. It's like, no, I don't like the lady who yelled Amy Adams. I should hate her. It's like, no, I don't like the lady who yelled Amy Adams. I like Amy Adams. So was that you? No, it wasn't her. She was at the show. That would be amazing.
Starting point is 01:01:31 She was at the show. How fucked up would that be? Yeah. Yeah. If the person who yelled Amy Adams was like, I'm going to go back and get that money. Yeah. What a long game. Holy shit.
Starting point is 01:01:46 She knows the long con, man. Ah, damn. She's playing Lucy's game. Directed by Aaron Sorkin. All right, so... So I'm taking this out of my wallet because I feel like, you know, that's what you do, though,
Starting point is 01:02:01 is you prove... You prove that that's really what was happening. So Danny, please read out loud what's written on that piece of paper. Amy fucking Adams. Yep. Yes, you can have it.
Starting point is 01:02:17 Yeah. Really? That was the first time you came to a show? To my show, and that happened, and then, wow, it really worked out for you. All these years later. How long ago do you think that was? I don't have an idea either.
Starting point is 01:02:36 It must be at least three or four years. At least. Wow. At least. And this name's been in my wallet for two years. Too long. So now, if I play this game again on the next show, it's going to go back down to 20 bucks. And this lady here has to pay it.
Starting point is 01:02:55 Yeah! I don't know, though. It feels like time to move on from this particular game after one spectacular round. With Chloe Grace Moretz, Amy Adams, Jay Law, who else? Julia Roberts, Brie Larson,
Starting point is 01:03:21 and Scarlett Johansson. This is stupid. Is it it though? This should take forever. But we're both idiots. We both have been proven to be the dumbest players I have to believe in the history of Doug Love's movies. I feel as if we're not even close. We're not Jeff Tate.
Starting point is 01:03:37 You both are in the top 10% of guests on this show. Really? In terms of answering the questions and being delightful, yes. Wow. Doug, I'll come back anytime. What a fun.
Starting point is 01:03:54 You lovable bastard. All right, so Danny, we're going to take turns naming movies that all those actresses have been in. There's probably a couple that two or three of them have been in together. Oh, and I was going to say, like, they all have to have been in it? Yeah. That's the fucked up part of this game.
Starting point is 01:04:13 None of us can think of a movie that has all of these actresses in it. Damn. Like, oh, my God. That would never. Oh, I can think of lots that have two of them. Anyway, so how much time do we have? Let's look at the clock. Okay. We got time we got time we can do this um who won the last game chad did i no no danny did all right he's running away with it so you get to go first in this so you can get to pick
Starting point is 01:04:41 the most obvious title i think i know what it is but then chad will say a movie that one of those five six actresses was in is it six because should we play amy too might as well throw her in there she's the cherry on top she really is all right um all right so six actresses we've got to take turns naming movies they're in. You can't think about it for too long, but take a second, of course. We'll go Chad, Danny, me, and then back to Chad. Chad, start us off. Say the movie
Starting point is 01:05:16 and the actress or actresses. Alright. Julia Roberts' Pretty Woman. That was the one. That's exactly the one. That's exactly the one I thought. That's the most famous movie that any of these six. I mean, obviously, they've been in bigger movies, but Pretty Woman's really a Julia Roberts thing.
Starting point is 01:05:35 All right, Danny. Julia Roberts, Erin Brockovich. Chloe Grace Moretz, Kick-Ass. Chloe Grace Moretz, Kick-Ass. Hit Girl is one of my favorite movie characters of all time. Just love watching her murder people in the face. Murder people in the face. I'll do Amy Adams Arrival.
Starting point is 01:05:59 Great movie. Great movie. Yeah, that's the guy, the Dune guy directed it, right? Yeah, Dennis Villanueva. Oh,, right? Yeah, Dennis Villanueva. Oh, did you say it? Dennis Villanueva. Villanueva. Isn't that how it is?
Starting point is 01:06:11 Isn't that how you say it? You're the only person I've ever met that acts confident in saying it. You know what I mean? People are like, that guy who directed Dune. Villanueva. I've never heard of Villanueva. I've never heard it laid out like that Danny
Starting point is 01:06:28 I will go with Jennifer Lawrence Hunger Games Is that bad? No it's not bad You're still in the game That's how it works I gotta go
Starting point is 01:06:43 For Brie L. I gotta go for Brie Larson. I gotta go Scott Pilgrim vs. The World. So good. Such a good movie. It's amazing. I'll say Brie Larson Kong Skull Island. That's my favorite Kong
Starting point is 01:07:03 movie. Yeah, I choked on my water saying it, but it is. Danny? I will go... Jennifer Lawrence, Hunger Games, Catching Fire. Yeah! I'll do sequels. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:07:22 We're not allowed to do sequels? Yeah. I'm going to go... We can do that. yeah that's gonna be crazy if we could do that oh this is fun i'm gonna go through all six of them and each one i'm gonna say if it hasn't been taken i'm gonna say my favorite movie that they are in uh so brie larson was scott pilgrim and uh chloe was kick-ass. So let's go... Oh shit, do I like a Jennifer Lawrence movie? You don't like Hunger Games? No.
Starting point is 01:07:56 Delightful. Delightful series. I'm going to say Scarlett Johansson, Jojo Rabbit. Really good. Very good movie. I'm going to go with one with two of them in it. Jennifer Lawrence and Amy Adams in
Starting point is 01:08:13 American Hustle. Wow. Nice. Danny. I'm quite concerned by how good the two of you are at this. Because it might shock you what I'm doing next. It's Jennifer Lawrence, Hunger Games, Mockingbird. Mockingbird J.
Starting point is 01:08:36 Oh, I just remembered my favorite of her movies is Hunger Games, Mockingjay Part 2. There you go. Saw my game, did you? Well discovered. No one has said it, so I'll say Brie Larson, Captain Marvel. Yeah, might as well say it. You mentioned it earlier.
Starting point is 01:08:57 Might as well say it. Yeah. Sure. I will go. Jennifer Lawrence. Don't look up. Thank you. Stop that.
Starting point is 01:09:11 I thought it was pretty good, actually. I thought it was a good poll, but everybody seems mad at me. Amy Adams, Enchanted. I'm going to say Jennifer Lawrence, Silver Linings Playbook. Yes. You're getting all the Silver Linings Playbook. Yes. You're getting all the David O. Russells.
Starting point is 01:09:28 Yeah. And them all. Yeah. Danny. I'm going to say. Thanks, everybody. I'm going to say, with my big blockbuster continuation, I will say Scarlett Johansson, Black Widow.
Starting point is 01:09:41 Ooh. Scarlett Johansson, Black Widow. Ooh. I'm gonna say J-Law and J-Oy. Joy. Oh. J-Oy.
Starting point is 01:09:55 That got me. I was like, he's lost it. I wish I had thought. I would have loved to buy a ticket to the box office. Can I have one for J-Oy? Chad.O.I.? Chad. Chad. Julia Roberts, my best friend's wedding. She was in that.
Starting point is 01:10:15 Danny. We're getting into scary territory for Danny, I will say. We're getting a little dangerous. But I'm going to say, just to keep ourselves a little safe, we're just going to say, well, we have more time to think. Scarlett Johansson, Avengers Civil War. Yeah, that's fair. We got to think of something. Julia Roberts, Runaway Bride.
Starting point is 01:10:34 Chad. Oof. Go Julia Roberts. I Love Trouble. That's a deep cut. What does that mean? Nolte. Is that a movie? That's a deep cut. What does that mean? Is that a movie? That is a movie.
Starting point is 01:10:49 Yeah, they're like competing newspaper reporters. Sounds great. What do you got, Danny? Here we go. You got it. You got it. You got it. I'm going to go, oh, God, I think it's the name of the movie, and this is a risk to take because I'm not positive, but here we go.
Starting point is 01:11:11 Jennifer Lawrence, Gravity? Is the name of that movie? Why would you, first of all, I decide whether it's right or wrong. She's not in Gravity. So settle down. Settle down. Don't say what you think she is in.
Starting point is 01:11:26 We can't discuss it. You just have to move on and pick something else and maybe think of it later. Okay, Scarlett Johansson and Iron Man 2. Okay. Jennifer Lawrence,
Starting point is 01:11:33 Passengers. Oh, that's what it's called. Oh. That's funny. That's fun. That movie was good, though. We don't talk about it enough. Chad?
Starting point is 01:11:49 Brie Larson's Short Term 12? Mm-hmm. Very good, yeah. Boy, we're falling apart in Danny Land. Good indie drama. Oh, no. Come on. Come on, Danny.
Starting point is 01:12:02 I'm falling apart. I'm so sorry. That's all right. You did great. I know. That's a good point. You can go to your person whose name tag you picked once. Not ready yet, too, because I'm going to say
Starting point is 01:12:15 Scarlett Johansson, Avengers Endgame. Yeah. Why not? Ooh, this is fun. Chloe Grace Moretz. Oh, shit, I'm going to fuck up the number, though. 500 Days of Summer? Yay, I did it. Yeah, she's like the little kid in that. It's like wise beyond her years.
Starting point is 01:12:42 She gives what's-his-name dating advice, and then he still she gives uh what's his name uh dating advice and then he still has sex with what's her name i say chloe grace moretz let me in yes of course go back and watch let the right one in uh instead of let me in the what what let me in was based on well because it's not as good. It's a remake of a foreign film that's amazing. Oh. What? Danny. What do you got?
Starting point is 01:13:13 I'm going to go Chloe Grace Moretz Kick-Ass 2. Yes! Good job! How long can I keep my bad answers coming while these two continue to say great great movies here we go i'm gonna go scarlett johansson the man who wasn't there that's where she was a precocious youngster that gave advice to a guy
Starting point is 01:13:37 did not have sex with somebody and he did anyway i'll say Julia Roberts hook Quickly Danny Before they start chanting See I told you Now Rubio started Cause that's their favorite taco place Oh that's Rubio started. Because that's their favorite taco place.
Starting point is 01:14:08 Oh, that's Rubio's. Sorry. Rue Fees. Oh! What a great answer. I'm going to say, hey, let's go dance on Iron Man 3. Kill me. Okay.
Starting point is 01:14:23 That's good. Kill me, throw me in the water. I hate myself. I hate everything I'm about. I don't like myself. No, that was a great play. Thank you. Oh, okay. So unnecessarily cruel.
Starting point is 01:14:41 Yeah, so mean. That's not a good answer. Not a good answer. I know, I don't feel good about it. I said that. Yeah, so mean. That's not a good answer. Not a good answer. I know, I don't feel good about it. I said that. I'm acknowledging that. I'm going to say Julia Roberts, Satisfaction. Ooh, my God, that's a deep cut.
Starting point is 01:14:56 Co-starring with Liam Neeson and Justine Bateman. Wow. And a rowboat. How do they do this? And a rowboat. Nothing says satisfaction like a rowboat. Life of they do this? In a rowboat. Nothing says satisfaction like a rowboat. Life of Pi was a remake of... Oh, I just thought of another one.
Starting point is 01:15:14 Anyway, go ahead, Chad. I'm going to say Julia Roberts' Conspiracy Theory. Yes. It's funny how people respond based what whether or not they like the movie so it's a funny funny the reaction anyway uh you want to go to your lifeline yeah what do you got kiana skojo and ghost world skojo and ghost world i should have that's i i like jojo Rabbit better, but yeah, Ghost World was good. You already said that. Yeah, exactly. I was pointing out that earlier I said Jojo Rabbit was my favorite movie,
Starting point is 01:15:51 and then I remembered Ghost World is awesome. All right, Chad. Oh, wait. Isn't it you? Oh, Danny got the, okay. It's you. All right, Danny. Keep thinking.
Starting point is 01:16:01 It'll be back to you soon. It's not looking good for old Danny. I was trying to think of a Brie Larson movie, but I just can't remember. If I just think of where it takes place, it's in a room. Room! I mean, they're cocky about it. It's just so rude. You're having fun with it. Chad. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 01:16:34 We got to do this, man. We got to start moving quicker. I'm going to say Scarlett Johansson, Lost in Translation. Boom. It's time to take me out. Take me out. I do like that one a lot, too. Take me out. You don't have anything? I got nothing. Boom. It's time to take me out. Take me out. I do like that one a lot, too. Take me out.
Starting point is 01:16:47 You don't have anything? I got nothing. Danny. Sorry. I'm out. I couldn't keep doing Avengers. I felt the crowd would turn on me. Oh, wait.
Starting point is 01:16:58 You got more Avengers? Yeah, she's in the thousand. There's a thousand. Yeah, so do another one. Keep doing them. All right. Fine. Yeah, she's in the... There's a thousand... Yeah, so do another one. Keep doing them. All right, fine. I mean, which... I mean, I'm pretty sure that she shows up in the original Avengers.
Starting point is 01:17:18 Right? Yeah, the original Avengers. All right, I feel so terrible. This is horrible. Don't feel bad about it. Such good answers. Don't feel bad about it. I'm about to say Avengers Age of Ultron. It just happens.
Starting point is 01:17:30 It just happens. They're in a lot of fucking Marvel movies. I know. They really are. There's so many of them. Julia Roberts Mystic Pizza. That's real good. Real good.
Starting point is 01:17:48 Oh, I just thought of a good one. That's the best one. Danny? No, no. You got another Marvel? No, I don't. I'm out. Take me out.
Starting point is 01:18:02 All right, Danny's out. Thank you for playing. Put me out of my misery. I'm sorry. Great job, Danny. I'm out. Take me out. All right. Danny's out. Thank you for playing. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Great job, Danny. My brain hurts. That's okay. It's a tough game. It's difficult.
Starting point is 01:18:14 Because like, why? That was so mean. I don't know what is happening. This lady hit drink three or something. And she's really been super critical. I'm pretty sure it's Lucy, right? No, it's not Lucy. That'd be amazing she got 400 i think it's not yeah lucy's yeah
Starting point is 01:18:34 i knew it lucy it's hard danny to remember the titles of some of these movies because it doesn't even make fucking sense. Like, why is Julia Roberts and Brad Pitt in a movie called The Mexican? Yeah. So it makes it hard to remember that it's a real movie. Chad? Oh, my God. Okay.
Starting point is 01:18:59 I mean, you win, basically. Okay. I'm trying to think of that recent amy adams the competition is between the two of you i just play to make it more fucked up i know amy adams nocturnal animals i like the parts she's not in yeah when she's not on the screen it's wonderful right because she's playing a character who's got her own issues and she's writing this book and then you see uh scenes from the book and they're amazing like michael shannon is amazing in it and then and then they didn't go back to her and it's not as much fun yeah yeah it's a real bipolar movie a real bipolar
Starting point is 01:19:38 experience but let's call chad ope it's the winner today you and I could continue this privately if you want to if you want to settle it uh but terrific job Chad you want to go ahead and uh give us your plugs go ahead and tell us where people can see you my plugs are I'm gonna be I'm heading up to Washington and Oregon Tacoma Seattle Salem Eugene Portland I'm doing the Tree Fort Music Fest in Boise
Starting point is 01:20:10 and then I'm heading to Anchorage, Alaska for the Before You Die Festival follow me on Instagram at Chad Opitz I'm posting up funny shit all the time on there
Starting point is 01:20:19 thanks guys and very good on Twitter oh yeah you're very good on Twitter oh thank you thank you so much very good on Twitter Oh yeah You're very good on Twitter Oh thank you Thank you so much Very good on Twitter
Starting point is 01:20:26 Good Twitter follow Danny Jollis Great first appearance Thank you You won the first two games Really good I did And you lasted a long time
Starting point is 01:20:34 In that last fucked up game Thank you so much And you were here At a historic moment I was We finally figured out This wallet shit So thank you for being here
Starting point is 01:20:43 Wallet And what would you like to plug? I'm going to plug three things. Hey, this I can remember. Please, please, please, please follow us and every comic that you like on any podcast on social media. Please follow me at Danny Jollis.
Starting point is 01:21:03 TikTokers are destroying our jobs. And they're genuinely selling out comedy clubs, and it's ruining it, so you have to follow us. It's the only way we fight back. Please follow us on social media. If you're listening to this, it really makes a difference. It sounds dumb. It's huge. Second, I have a special on YouTube called Six Parts.
Starting point is 01:21:18 It's my first special. I'm really proud of it, and I would love if you watched it. And my third one is that stand-up comedy is like hockey. It is fun to watch on TV, but it is a different experience live. Please go see live stand-up comedy. You have to do it. You have to. You have to, have to, have to.
Starting point is 01:21:39 So I honest, genuine with this part of the plug, don't worry about seeing me. Just go to your local comedy club if you're listening to this. Just go find a real comic and watch them do it. Go see real comedy. Go watch live stand-up comedy. Find out where Danny's playing and go anywhere you want. You don't have to go see him. Can I add one thing? Make your own choice.
Starting point is 01:21:55 To Danny? What's that? I don't know if you knew this, but he's blowing up right now on Amazon Prime. So you're going to want to see that. You're going to want to see that. You've got to see that. I'm going to be doing a bunch of shows at South by Southwest in Austin, Texas next month. And I won't have to mess with that thing in my wallet anymore.
Starting point is 01:22:18 So it's very freeing. Very exciting. One more time for my my guest Chad Opitz and Danny Jollis Chad real real quick Chad do you want to do a victory somersault? Oh shit okay yeah where's he going?
Starting point is 01:22:46 he's got to do the whole lap. He does a whole lap. Watch out. This guy's going to get in his way. Jesus. Oh. Oh. Wow.
Starting point is 01:22:58 That guy. That guy over there got up and slapped his hand as he ran by. I had visions of that bicycle race where that dumb lady stepped out in front of all the bikes. Jesus Christ. Thank you to the Sac Punch, the Sacramento Punchline. Thank you to everybody who came out this afternoon. I know that it's a big mattress buying weekend, so I appreciate you making the time.
Starting point is 01:23:29 I close every episode now with the last line from a motion picture, so get that end music ready to go. It's a pretty short one. As always, now where was I? Now where was I? Now, where was I? Woo! Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold as you and I.
Starting point is 01:23:48 Where's your prize bag, Bruce? There's no room in his heart for you. Because Doug loves movies.

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