Doug Loves Movies - Dave Foley, Martha Kelly, Brandon Wardell and Eric Edelstein guest

Episode Date: January 14, 2019

Live from the SF Sketchfest in San Francisco, Doug welcomes Dave Foley, Martha Kelly, Brandon Wardell and Eric Edelstein to the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on St...itcher Premium. For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Doug hates candy wrappers screening baby sticky seeds With 50 azipop or kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see But Doug loves movies Hey Hey, hey, hey, everybody. I'd like this microphone to be a little hotter, please. My name is Doug, and I love movies. This is God Loves Movies.
Starting point is 00:00:43 Shush, that's not the right time for that. Stop it. Oh, so much going on today. This is so exciting, you guys. We're coming to you once again from the Gateway Theater as part of SF Sketch Fest in San Francisco, California!
Starting point is 00:01:13 It's Saturday, January 12th, 2019, and this is the second DLM taping of the year, and I would like to see some name tags right this second. And thanks to the folks at NextVR, people are watching this show right now with their helmets on
Starting point is 00:01:33 and they're watching all of this but there's a, one of the VR cameras is in the back so could you guys just quickly turn your name tags around and show the back? And also we'll get a little house light action. Look at these things. I just want them to see what we're dealing with here. Great job. Thank you for doing that. And we'll be back to you in a
Starting point is 00:01:58 little bit. We can bring the lights back down. We'll be back to pick name tags in a little while. Oh, that was close. That was going to be a loud noise if I pulled that microphone off of that stool. Doug plugs, tomorrow, also part of Sketch Fest, press start, Audible presents, as part of that, the Benson movie interruption of the final film in the most talked about trilogy
Starting point is 00:02:23 since the prequels. We're gonna fucking watch, can I swear on VR? We're gonna watch Fifty Shades Freed. Yeah. We saw the first two chapters of this rotten series in the gorgeous Castro Theater here in San Francisco and we're going to finally finish it off.
Starting point is 00:02:49 Are some of you going to be there? All right. Tell your friends it's a huge theater. Doug Loves Movies is back at our OG home, the UCB Theater
Starting point is 00:03:03 in Los Angeles this Tuesday, January 11th. Next Sunday, excuse me, Saturday, next Saturday, January 19th, Doug Loves Movies returns to Tacoma, Washington at the Tacoma Comedy Club at 420. And Sunday, January
Starting point is 00:03:17 27th, Doug Loves Movies returns to the Comedy Cellar at the Rio in Las Vegas at 420. I'll be coming to Dallas, Raleigh, Sacramento, Tampa, and more in February. For all my dates and deets and links, oh my,
Starting point is 00:03:33 go to Douglovesmovies.com. That's Douglovesmovies.com! Yeah! See, that's where you do that part. Next VR, thank you for doing this. They broadcast live sports and entertainment. And I feel like this shows a little of both sports and entertainment. Maybe not enough of either.
Starting point is 00:04:01 And yeah, and so there's people just, you know, staying at home. Didn't have to go on all the effort you guys went to. The trick is we're going to have to figure out how to get their name tags involved in VR. Because you guys are the only ones that get to participate today. But thank you to everybody who's watching. Tweet at Doug Benson if you did the VR thing with your VR helmet and you know Let me know if you liked it what you thought of it Amazing prize bag for today because our friends at spark awesome dispensary here in San Francisco
Starting point is 00:04:38 Gave us one of their hoodies and Tons of other items. I don't think there's any actual weed in here because you know how that goes. But I'll probably see you outside if you want to smoke some of mine. And the prize bag that I brought is a Willie's Reserve bag. The great Willie Nelson has his own line of weed
Starting point is 00:05:02 as everybody does these days. I got a hat that says WM on that. Do you know what that stands for? Weed maps. You did it! I looked right at that guy. How the fuck... Do you use weed maps?
Starting point is 00:05:16 You have, okay. Wow, that was great. I wish the homies could see you that's what I'm going to call the people watching VR the homies I got a Douglas Movies t-shirt you can still get those online somewhere
Starting point is 00:05:40 a Douglas Movies sticker you can always get those from me a sippy cup from I forget which Broadway show I saw, and I drank alcohol during it. And then I was just in Los Angeles, where I live, but I grabbed a copy of Los Angeles Magazine. So that you guys can flip through it and go, no, we're good here.
Starting point is 00:06:02 This isn't an all right place. All of that's in the prize bag, plus stuff brought by my four amazing guests who are all appearing in shows at Sketchfest all weekend long. Please give it up for Martha Kelly, Eric Edelstein, Brandon Wardell,
Starting point is 00:06:18 and Dave Foley! Thank you! Hey! I wonder if the VR people are clapping. Are they just sitting there? Yes! Welcome, everybody. Let's meet them individually, shall we? Starting with, right here on my left, Martha Kelly! with right here on my left, Martha Kelly!
Starting point is 00:07:11 You tore the games up in Austin a few weeks ago, so it's nice to have you back. Thanks. I lost that game, so I don't know how much I did. You're all winners to me. Okay. Yeah, but it was fun having you. The bottom line. It was really fun to do it.
Starting point is 00:07:25 We have a good time. Have you ever done anything in VR before? No. All right, just for the rest of the panel, remember, longer answers are better. Sorry. What are you up to here at Sketch Fest? What other shows have you done or are you about to do?
Starting point is 00:07:44 I just got in last night. So before this, mostly I've just been going back and forth to Starbucks. And then later tonight at 10.30 at Cobb's, I'm co-headlining with Mary Lynn Rice Cobb. And Dwayne Perkins is doing a set. And it hopefully will be fun. That sounds great. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:05 Bring a coat. A coat or a coat? Yeah, a Cobbs. Oh, is it cold? Yeah, I don't know why, but I was in a show there last night, and it was cold inside. I had to go outside to warm up. Really?
Starting point is 00:08:21 Yeah. I'll bring my coat and my mittens. Yeah, well, you'll be on stage, so I guess the stage lights will warm you up a little bit. But thank you for being here, Martha. Thank you for having me, Doug. Also joining us for, I believe, it's his second time on the opposite end there.
Starting point is 00:08:37 You can't miss him. It's Eric Edelstein, everybody. Hi, guys. Thank you. Yay. Thank you. Now, you're a character actor. You've been in a ton of stuff.
Starting point is 00:08:49 There's so many great movies and things we can talk about. But I want to talk about your wife. I don't blame you. Because I just learned today that she is a dog groomer, has her own dog grooming business. Yes, my wife is a dog groomer. Has her own dog grooming business. Yes. My wife is a dog groomer to the stars. And an Instagram famous dog groomer. You can follow her at
Starting point is 00:09:12 at Jess Rona Grooming. She has like 130,000 followers. She has a book out now. Yeah, it's pretty hysterical. She does Katy Perry's dog. But I kind of live in a sitcom because I'll like they're supposed to go around the back because of boundaries. You know, It's my home. But they'll knock the door
Starting point is 00:09:27 and I'll throw on basketball shorts and be upset. And then I'll answer and it's like, Andy Garcia. Did I use the wrong door? And I'm like, no! Come on in, Andy! It's a total trip. It's amazing. Will she groom your dog if you're a fading 90s
Starting point is 00:09:44 celebrity? That ain't you, man. You're my hero dog if you're a fading 90s celebrity? That ain't you, man. You're my hero. Are you kidding me? Come on over. My dog is filthy. She does me, too. She does my back hair now. I wish I was kidding. Every hair I lose here has ended up somewhere. Did she put you on a short leash on a table?
Starting point is 00:10:01 It's a medium leash, Dave. I'm working up, you know? Wow. And the main reason I think you should check out the Instagram page of his wife is because when she blow dries the dogs at the end
Starting point is 00:10:18 of their grooming, she makes videos of that. Yeah. There's nothing like a dog being blow dried. No. Well, and I love it because it's been her day job for 18 years,
Starting point is 00:10:29 and she has a passion for it and does classes and enters in grooming competitions, which are, like, best in show. I went to a convention with her in Hershey, Pennsylvania this year, name drop. But what I love about it is...
Starting point is 00:10:41 Location drop. Name drop. One day, she was just sitting there, and she probably had 300 followers, and this dog was blow-drawing. She's like, that's kind of cinematic. And she'd always want to direct, and then she put a Beyonce song with it,
Starting point is 00:10:53 and it blew up. And then Tegan and Sarah got into it, and Katy Perry, and it's turned into this whole thing. And luckily, I'm a character actor, so I love it when people are more excited about her. I'm like, I'm good with it, this is my job, let's roll, babe. And she's cutting my back hair. At least you didn't say my wife blows dogs.
Starting point is 00:11:14 Also joining us... Doug, that was one time and she's not drinking anymore. That's really sad for the dogs. No, it is, it is. I feel bad, man. I put up with the blow dryer. That's really sad for the dogs. No. It is. I feel bad. I put up with the blow dryer. Also on stage with us today, it's Brandon Wardell, everybody.
Starting point is 00:11:35 Hi. How's it going, dude? I'm good. I was trying to get Doug with sober today, and then I took a hit of your vape. Now I'm blackout high. I'm fucking tripping. I'm feeling good. That's not what happens. Dude, I'm fucking tripping.
Starting point is 00:12:03 I mean, I like my vape pen, but it's not that good. I swear to God, man, I took one hit of weed. Everything is tie-dye. I'm looking into this crowd. I'm like, huh? Is this a Lord of the Rings? Do you need an impartial tester to see where that's at? Oh, yeah, sure. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:20 I didn't even know you did this sort of thing. Oh, really? Yeah. Man. You got to come on my other podcast. Done. Yeah. Yay! I'm just going to walk around in this smoke over here. Repurpose it.
Starting point is 00:12:35 And you have shows all weekend as well? They were all last night. It's all done? Yeah. They were good. It's all over but the tripping and the crying? They sold out. It's a small venue, though.
Starting point is 00:12:51 It's not impressive. You were doing Brandon and Friends shows. I'm sure it was a good time. It was good. Was anybody there? No? All right. Thank you for not looking.
Starting point is 00:13:00 You're asking these people that weren't there if there was anybody there? Well, I don't know. Was it empty? I was just asking if they were there last night, and apparently the Venn diagram is just two separate circles. So... Well, let's, you know,
Starting point is 00:13:15 today we'll hopefully help bridge the gap in our Venn diagram and get people into one circle that we're both in. And get people into one circle that we're both in. And finally, it's Dave Foley! Dave Foley! Touring around with the
Starting point is 00:13:46 Whose Line Is It Anyway fellas? Yes, I am. With Gregory Proops and Jeff Davis and Joel Murray. Yeah, love those guys. Love that show. Got to see you do it in Washington, D.C. a while back. Oh, that's right, yeah. That was your first one maybe, right?
Starting point is 00:14:01 No, I'd done it a few... A couple times? My first one was Evansville... Was it Indiana? Wow, you guys are really dropping locations. It's no Hershey. Time smells like chocolate, Dave. I know.
Starting point is 00:14:17 Yeah. But yeah, that was... I jumped in on that. Ryan got sick and they needed somebody within eight hours. But now they're like kind of rotating dudes, so you check the listings in this different group of four guys every time. Yeah, me and Ryan and Drew and...
Starting point is 00:14:36 Yeah, Drew Carey's going for some of the shows. Yeah, or sort of swapping out. Yeah, that's neat. I love it. I'm going to come see it again if I can. It's a lot of fun. And what else is going on for you here at Sketch Fest? Well, it came out, we did the kids in the hall thing last night.
Starting point is 00:14:53 Sorry, Brandon, but who went to that? Keep working, kid. That's like just one circle completely filled with another circle. And then you've got stuff tonight, too? Tonight? No, just doing this and then doing Story Pirates tomorrow. Oh, okay. That's a show that people
Starting point is 00:15:24 can bring their children to. What am I doing? Oh, we did a podcast last night, too. I forgot about that. Yeah. We did a podcast. Who was helping you out
Starting point is 00:15:32 with that just now? Huh? That's my wife, Chrissy. My wife! My wife. Yay! Yeah. Chrissy, who produces
Starting point is 00:15:40 our podcast. Yeah, so she's doing a great job. She's getting the word out. It's not easy. I'm not a good... I'm not good at promoting. What's the podcast called?
Starting point is 00:15:53 It's called... I can say here. It's called Don't Say Cunt. And it's a podcast where Paul Greenberg and I promise the audience, out of respect for Americans who don't like the word cunt, that we will talk for 45 minutes straight without saying cunt. What happens if you do say it? Do you get slimed or something?
Starting point is 00:16:22 Do you fall into it? So far there have been no repercussions. We haven't built that into the format. Because you do slip and say it. Occasionally, but very rarely. Very, very rarely. It's so hard. Mostly when someone else comes in and when a surprise guest will come in
Starting point is 00:16:37 and will sometimes go, oh, hey, welcome to Don't Say Cunt. Oh, sorry, we weren't supposed to. Well, yeah, if you're just quoting the title, that's not so bad. That works out okay. And it is, it's a show that you can tune in with your children
Starting point is 00:16:54 and know that for 45 minutes the word cunt won't be said. No such luck with this show. No, no. Sorry, kids.
Starting point is 00:17:08 This show is filthy. Well, thank you all for being here. Of course, part of the show is I insist that people bring stuff to contribute to the prize bag. And I reached out to Martha
Starting point is 00:17:21 and reminded her about it. And what was your response? I didn't bring anything from Texas or wherever you just were. I have a bunch of stuff I could have brought and I forgot. So I went to Walgreens today. But they didn't have anything that anybody would have wanted as a gift. In all of Walgreens? I mean.
Starting point is 00:17:46 What a worthless store. That's the slogan. Nothing you want. It didn't seem. So I got a $20 Starbucks gift card in this bag. And then this is also the marijuana gift bag with a bag of Pop Secret popcorn. I'm sorry. Let me see.
Starting point is 00:18:08 There is pot in the bag. So each one of us, yeah, we got our own individual bags from Spark. I'm sorry I forgot to bring stuff and whoever wins this, if you feel cheated and you want to message me on the internet,
Starting point is 00:18:24 I will send you some more stuff. I think they're going to be okay with a couple of pre-rolls and, yeah, three pre-rolls and whatever this thing is. And there's an envelope with what felt like marijuana buds in it. It is marijuana buds. Oh, yeah, these fancy sealed things. But it's kind of presupposing that somebody in Doug's audience likes pot. I think pot is pretty popular at this whole festival.
Starting point is 00:19:00 But thank you for that, Martha. That's great that you paid it forward. Well, sorry it's not more. Now I'm going to try to convince Brandon to contribute his shoes. Oh, yeah, this is... Those are some colorful motherfuckers. Good shoes.
Starting point is 00:19:17 Where'd you buy them, cunts? Is it... Where are the VR? Where's the VR cameras? I Right here? I don't know if Well, I mean
Starting point is 00:19:31 We're getting into a different topic entirely But like For my podcast I have like a Patreon Where $5 gets you bonus episodes But $10 gets you feet pics And like I'll post pictures of my feet.
Starting point is 00:19:46 It's a size 13 feet. And they look great. Do you want me to open the back? Yeah, what do you got? I hope you're hanging on to all the weed that they gave you. So I went to the Alamo Drafthouse gift shop and found this Iron Giant tiki mug.
Starting point is 00:20:09 Nice! If you guys are into Iron Giant at all, it's a great film. I cry when he says Superman at the end. That made me cry. And then there's like a... Why, did you think of Christopher Reeve? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:31 By the way, do you remember all those Eminem songs where he would talk about Christopher Reeve? Really? He mentions him a lot. I don't know, just go to... He mentions him more than Pee Wee Herman? He does mention Pee Wee Herman a lot too I don't know. Just go to like. He mentions him more than Pee Wee Herman.
Starting point is 00:20:46 Go to Rap Genius. He does mention Pee Wee Herman a lot too. I know. Go to Rap Genius. Search Christopher Reeve M&M. You'll find a lot of lines. It's just something interesting to think about. But also in this bag, there is a receipt. There's a receipt and it has the last four digits of my credit card number.
Starting point is 00:21:08 And if you want to guess the rest, you can steal my identity. Somebody will steal my identity tonight. Let's fucking go. I'm going to give you all of my credit card information and my social security number also. And in addition to an Iron Giant ceramic tiki mug. Well, the tiki mug's enough, but okay. Pass that on down here. Yeah, all right, great.
Starting point is 00:21:33 Thanks. Oh, it didn't come in a bag? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Is it your own personal bag? Yeah. Wait a minute, you kind of said they could try. They can try, they can try. I'll put it in there.
Starting point is 00:21:49 I don't think, there is no try with this crowd. I think they know computers. Oh, then maybe, how easy is it, how easy is it to guess somebody's credit card number, in theory? Well, they'd have to do a lot of combinations, but they probably have a program that could just run through them and find it. Yeah, can you give me that receipt back, actually?
Starting point is 00:22:13 It was like, yeah, thank you. I don't know. Yeah, I thought it through, and, you know, I changed my mind about that bit. That's the thing, is it was, like, you guys didn't even like that as a bit that much.
Starting point is 00:22:33 And then, like, so it, like, didn't really pay off crowd-wise. And then I also actually get my identity stolen. Sounds like a bad deal. That's the joke version of a long con. Yeah. The bit was on me the whole time. Dude, I
Starting point is 00:22:53 fucking love to prank myself by getting my identity stolen. Dave, what do you got for us? Oh, I'm also a terrible person. So what I did was I just went to the swag room in the hotel and just like
Starting point is 00:23:09 really overstuffed this bag. Do you want to give us the highlights or do you want to talk about every item? I don't know, there's a poster that I'm currently wrecking. There's beer. There's a couple of beers in here.
Starting point is 00:23:37 There's some sort of water drink. It's perfect for hitting a mugger with on your way home. There's a tin cup. In case your vision fails. You need to start a new line of work. You have to get your own pencils. I didn't get pencils.
Starting point is 00:24:00 And there's other stuff. There's food. I stole a whole box Of those kind bars Oh Yeah That's something That sounds like
Starting point is 00:24:11 It should have weed in it Yeah I could give my weed too I don't smoke weed I could go get my weed As well Oh that's okay I'll take care of that
Starting point is 00:24:19 Okay Oh here Wow that is really You really could Fuck somebody up with this Oh yeah Bam Eric let's test it out Oh, here. Wow, that is really... You really could fuck somebody up with this. Oh, yeah. Bam! Eric, let's test it out.
Starting point is 00:24:28 I know you used to be a bouncer. Oh, don't forget the mangled poster. Yeah. All right. Thank you, Dave. What do you got for us, Eric? Somebody's not going to be able to carry all this stuff. Oh, I know.
Starting point is 00:24:40 It's an embarrassment of riches. I have some incredible Caf Cafe Du Monde coffee. Right? So if you don't want the real caffeine, I am re-gifting from the great people at Spark
Starting point is 00:24:51 one joint. The other two in the bag are staying here. Yeah. And I'm here with the wonderful Cartoon Network program We Bare Bears.
Starting point is 00:25:02 Oh. Thank you. Much smaller than your applause, Dave. But a little more than yours. This is a grizzly bear phone charger. This is a gray or brown market. It's not licensed,
Starting point is 00:25:16 but they're not giving me a cut or a taste of the merch anyway, so I don't care. This has been my personal charger throughout today, and it's now yours. And I want to invite all you to come to our show tomorrow night, We Bare Bears Live, and turn or send down somebody specifically to make sure we wouldn't do any
Starting point is 00:25:31 drug references. Wait, what? How could someone stop you from doing that? We got a note at Comic Con, the only time the three of us have been there, and they handed Dimitri Martin a note that said, stop talking about drugs. No drug jokes.
Starting point is 00:25:48 So I talked to Cole, the founder of the festival, and he asked me, and then I went to Daniel Chong, the creator, because we kind of knew if it went to Turner, they probably wouldn't say yes. And so then they've added people to the list today to come on down and make sure we're not talking too much about drugs.
Starting point is 00:26:05 Oh, okay. Tomorrow. So now it sounded like you could talk about it a little. If you want to on down and make sure we're not talking too much about drugs. Tomorrow. If you want to pass the pen down, we're good. If anybody doesn't watch We Bare Bears, it's so good. I love you. I am not sure. Both of you are voices in two things that are very important to me.
Starting point is 00:26:24 Oh, Doug. Bugs life. Bugs life. Bugs life. Bugs life for life. Bugs life. Fuck ants. Fuck it.
Starting point is 00:26:33 Yeah. Fuck ants. Fuck those ugly. Fuck ants, dude. Those ugly brown pieces of shit. Blue ants are where it's at. Woody Allen was canceled as soon as ants came out, as far as I'm concerned. Yeah. That was his, you know, that was like his second biggest crime.
Starting point is 00:26:49 If you ask me. But honestly, I don't know. I don't mean to like pop off about Ants. No, you, hey, you say what you have to say. Yeah. I mean, I'll go off off i'll go off about ants i'm sorry i look who the that movie fucking sucks like imagine i don't know how recently any of you guys have watched ants but like imagine you're a child right you're a child and you're like oh yeah i'm gonna see a cool cartoon movie about ants. And then you go in and it's just like Woody Allen as an ant
Starting point is 00:27:30 going to therapy and shit. You'd be like, yeah, fuck this movie, you know? Yeah, fuck ants. True story. Right after I got hired to be in A Bug's Life, I went back to work on my show News Radio and I was telling everyone I was very proud. I said, oh, I got hired, be in A Bug's Life, I went back to work on my show News Radio, and I was telling everyone I was very proud.
Starting point is 00:27:47 I said, oh, I got hired, I'm doing this movie. It's a computer-generated animated movie, and I'm the lead ant in this movie. And they were all looking at me really, really sadly, because that day there was an article in Variety saying, Woody Allen to star in ant movie. And I thought, oh, fuck, I got fired got fired wait did they put out A Bug's Life
Starting point is 00:28:07 came out first right no Ants came out first but they but Ants like Dreamworks knew that A Bug's Life was gonna come out
Starting point is 00:28:15 they pulled some shady shit it was pitched to Disney when Jeffrey Katzenberg was at Disney and then oddly enough when he started out
Starting point is 00:28:24 at the Spielberg company, whatever that company's called, Geffen Spielberg-y, then they came up with their own ant movie that looked almost exactly like the original drawings for A Bug's Life. And they asked us to
Starting point is 00:28:39 hold off on A Bug's Life until after Prince of Persia came out. And they would bury ants. I just want to say how much I like Jeffrey Katzenberg and appreciate the great work he's doing. Here's your pen. I think he's great. I think Geffen is wonderful.
Starting point is 00:29:02 Underrated. Despite what he did to Neil Young. Geffen sued Neil Young for not being Neil Young. What? That was a bit. I'm not a big Geffen guy. He sued Neil Young for his 80s work, and he was breaking through. Trans, electronica, craft work.
Starting point is 00:29:15 This is David Geffen? David Geffen had a record label. Oh, he was like, I mean, I don't want to speak out of turn, but he did some, like, pedo shit, right? Is that? Nope, nope. Wrong guy. Is that? Nope, nope. Wrong guy. Is that? Wrong guy.
Starting point is 00:29:27 Is that a different Geffen? Yeah, he's still all right. That's a different, okay. You mean Geppetto shit. I mean, right. Yeah. He did the best puppet. Oh, he did.
Starting point is 00:29:35 He did. He turned a boy from wood. You're right. Yes. Shit, that didn't sound easy. Yes. By the way, let's make some noise for Bohemian Rhapsody and Bryan Singer real quick. What are you doing? let's make some noise for Bohemian Rhapsody and Bryan Singer
Starting point is 00:29:45 real quick What are you doing? Confusing everybody No, but Bryan Singer is, you know, he's a pedophile and that's confirmed Did he direct Bohemian Rhapsody? He did
Starting point is 00:30:00 I think three people directed it He got fired like two weeks before but his name's still on the thing and he's still profits He did. Well, he, you know, there's, I think, three people directed it, because they took him off at some point. He got fired, like, two weeks before, but his name's still on the thing, and he's still profits. Yeah, because the director's guild gets to say who gets the director's credit. For some reason, he got it. Yeah. But maybe they just drew straws.
Starting point is 00:30:17 Yeah. I didn't mean to talk about pedophiles this much this early on the podcast. I'm sorry. Yeah. We'll be back with more pedophiles and cunnibals. I gotta assume a lot of people at home with Oculus Go headsets are pedophiles. I mean, that's just a fair...
Starting point is 00:30:43 I mean, that's just a fair assumption, isn't it? It's just truth, Dave. If these people hate you for your truth, let them. Yeah. I didn't come here to make friends. Nope. And he's not. No.
Starting point is 00:30:58 I mean, this is... I'm going to feel bad for saying this, but, you know, there's... VR porn is big. They're making VR child porn. And that's... I think that's bad. Okay?
Starting point is 00:31:13 I'm not saying... Okay, we're all on the record. I'm not endorsing that. I think it's bad. We all agree that that's bad. Let's all agree that VR child porn is bad. And they shouldn't do it. Can we get some applause going for that?
Starting point is 00:31:25 Yeah. Yeah, let's give it up. I think, yeah. And Hitler. I think child porn sucks. Not cool. Yeah. Not cool, Hitler.
Starting point is 00:31:36 Yeah. I'll tell you what, I don't like what the South did in that Civil War. No. Yes. Thumbs down here. Come at me. Go off. Yes.
Starting point is 00:31:47 President Donald Trump, bad in my opinion. Sorry. Yep. There are good and bad people in Trump. He's both sides. Alright, let's get on to the giving away of all this great stuff that you guys brought
Starting point is 00:32:12 because I'm about to say, let the games begin! Oh. Lady and gentlemen, this is the moment where you choose your name tags. Just select whichever one you like the best. And if we can get the house lights up a little bit so the VR folks can enjoy this portion of the show. And we'll be right back.
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Starting point is 00:33:46 Back to the show. All right. We're back. Great job, everybody. Get back to him. Let's see what we're dealing with here. Martha, who do you got? Oh, Scott. I saw this on the internet, and do you got? Oh, Scott.
Starting point is 00:34:05 I saw this on the internet and I liked it a lot. It's Mary, Queen of Scots. Yes. Right? So he didn't have to Photoshop anything, but he did put our faces in over Sursa, Ronan, and Margot Robbie.
Starting point is 00:34:21 But we also have big fat joints in our mouths. So he got that wrong, but you still picked it. Well, my policy is whoever is closest to the stage. So I apologize to people farther back, but also not to take away from Scott. It's a wonderful poster. Great job, Scott. But it was right in the front row.
Starting point is 00:34:46 We'll put it right down here now. Brandon? So this is, I read the name of the person? On the front. Okay, well they made the sandlot. They did like a drawing. It's very cute. It's a cute little drawing.
Starting point is 00:35:03 Give it up for that drawing. Their faces are kind of in the style of the logo for this show. And it says, The Sam Lot. They're more than just a podcast. They're the best buddies in the entire history of the world. So this isn't really a podcast, though, The Sam Lot. Where's Sam at?
Starting point is 00:35:24 Hi. Oh, it's a lady? Hi, Sam. Antha. Did you know your name has the word ant in it? Does anyone here have a name with the word bug in it? But great selection there, and good luck. You're going to need it because Brandon's playing for you.
Starting point is 00:35:47 What do you got there, Dave? I got Napoleon Dynamite. Beautiful drawing. And he's got some of the cast of Napoleon Dynamite here and John Hodgman for some reason. That's Napoleon Dynamite's brother. That was John Hodgman?
Starting point is 00:36:08 I didn't know. Yeah, his brother's a judge. I gotta go back and watch that again. Don't say that on the back. Leave that alone. That's for later, right? Walk away from that. And I picked this because it was easy to hold.
Starting point is 00:36:22 Right, it's not heavy. I've made the mistake of getting really big ones before. Yeah, well, Eric got a really big one. Yeah. Look at that shit. Billing him softly. There was also a really good No Country for Old Men one there, and I threw them a joint, so they're already a winner.
Starting point is 00:36:37 But, I mean, look at that Photoshop. That's just impressive. That's really good. Yeah. Yeah. Can I keep this one, Bill? And is your name Nat? Natalie.
Starting point is 00:36:47 Oh, I forgot to say, you're not going to win. It's because I'm really terrible at all these games. Well, now it's feeling like it's anybody's game. Yeah. I don't know how to handicap this one. But yeah, you go ahead and throw that down on the ground there, Eric. And the first game we're going to play, we're going to try to get through three games today. how to handicap this one. But yeah, you go ahead and throw that down on the ground there, Eric. And the first game we're going to play,
Starting point is 00:37:08 we're going to try to get through three games today. And this first one is called Swift Justice. Yeah. It's a game that's going to go away soon, and you'll find out why in a second. Because we played it a bunch of times. I'm a Taylor Swift fan. And she has a bunch of songs that just happen to be a bunch of times. I'm a Taylor Swift fan, and she has a bunch of songs that just happen to be the titles of movies.
Starting point is 00:37:30 Her title of her song is also the title of a movie. They don't have anything to do with each other, but it does happen. And so I'm going to read the IMDb page description of this movie that is also the title of a Taylor Swift song, and each of you just guess as often as you'd like, and the first person who names it correctly IMDb page description of this movie that is also the title of a Taylor Swift song. And each of you just guess as often as you'd like. And the first person who names it correctly wins.
Starting point is 00:37:57 And if the description isn't enough, then I will give a clue that should help. Are we supposed to just jump in and guess or wait until you call on us? Well, I know you like to interrupt and you're real brash. But yeah, just say it as soon as it comes into your head. Okay. Yeah, and guess as many times as you like. There's no wrong answers, just answers that won't win you the game.
Starting point is 00:38:20 Are you ready for it? I like it. You guys are intense. When Jesse Lujak steals a car in Las Vegas and drives down to L.A. I already have an issue with this because you drive across to L.A. Not down to it.
Starting point is 00:38:49 It's not San Diego. Oh, fuck. I know this one. God damn it. You think you know it? Yeah, but I can't remember it. Well, when Jesse Lujak, also Lujak, and he's stealing a car, that's silly.
Starting point is 00:39:04 Steals a car in Las Vegas. Maybe they named the LoJack after this guy. So he stole a car in Las Vegas, drives down to L.A. His criminal ways only escalate. Yeah, I knew this was going to be a tough one. Is it Trouble? No, but that's a great guess. Bad Blood?
Starting point is 00:39:23 No. Okay. But it is a Taylor Swift song. And then this is the end of the description in IMDb. It says his criminal ways have escalated. But when will it end? The sooner the better, I thought, while I was watching it.
Starting point is 00:39:45 Nothing? Nothing? A little clarification. Who's Taylor Swift? She works with Eric's wife, grooming dogs. She blows all the dogs. All right, here's some clues, and these are clues with regards to what the title is, not necessarily what happened in the movie.
Starting point is 00:40:17 I wanted less, not more, and it didn't leave me out of breath. Is it breathless? Yes. Martha Kelly won that first game. See, I told you anybody could take this down, Martha. That's a backhanded compliment. But I'm trying to remember the Taylor Swift song Breathless.
Starting point is 00:40:48 Does anyone... Could somebody hum a few bars? I don't know it. I think it was in her more country time. I got into her more when she got poppy. Like red or 1989? Which one? I like a little bit of Red and I like all of 1989
Starting point is 00:41:05 and I even like Reputation What can you do? I don't love Red I thought Red Red was her first pop album and people act like 1989 was her first pop album and it pisses me off
Starting point is 00:41:17 Wow, you're really out there fighting the good fight Yeah, I get pissed off when I think about this You're picking the right battles out there fighting the good fight. I get pissed off when I think about this. You're picking the right battles. Because, see, I saw when Kanye got up at that award show, I thought, well, he seems to know what he's talking about.
Starting point is 00:41:39 So I've just not paid any attention to him. While he was talking, like, what? So I figured, I'm not going to listen to her stuff. That's reasonable. But yeah, I don't know the Breathless song, but Breathless, the movie's been made a couple of times, but that one was the one with Richard Gere was the one I was describing.
Starting point is 00:41:58 Yeah. I had a neighbor with a speech impediment and my mom couldn't figure out why Louise kept telling her to see Breadless. She's like, Dan, I can't figure out this movie. Breadless? Breathless. A medium anecdote. But I ordered a large.
Starting point is 00:42:23 Alright. So, Martha, you get to go first in our next game. Exciting. Sorry. And it's called How Long Is It? Yeah, this is fun because I'm gonna name a thing and then you guys have to guess how long it is
Starting point is 00:42:49 Okay How come you keep blowing smoke when I've got the pen over here? This is a jewel My daughter's friends have those Is it like How old is your daughter? I get...
Starting point is 00:43:09 Wait, how old is your daughter? She's 15. Okay. Yeah, I... Yeah. I don't know. We won't let her have one because we're unreasonable.
Starting point is 00:43:23 I get shamed for it. It's like vaping for kids. That's their business model. Am I supposed... I'm trying to quit cigarettes. This is what I'm doing. I'm applauding you. I'm getting shamed
Starting point is 00:43:37 by everyone in this. I'm getting shamed by a hundred people right now. There's avatars just shaking their heads. It's good. But it's like, I don't know what the, should I like carry around a giant vaping rig? I'm not judging you.
Starting point is 00:43:53 Thank you. I'm not judging. I'm just stating a fact about my daughter's friends. Okay. But what's in a Juul? Isn't it more like a nicotine thing? Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:44:07 You like that too, Eric? Yeah, it's nice. Yeah. Thank you. Sure. You're going to get hooked, dude. Oh, man. Thank you, buddy.
Starting point is 00:44:18 Eric, you were on the Twin Peaks TV show. Yeah. Yeah. I thought of it just because I can imagine that that set had a lot of people standing around smoking cigarettes all day. Oh, my gosh, Doug. One point, one point, I looked
Starting point is 00:44:36 over, and I swear, David Lynch was sitting there on a tiny stool with a cigarette and a megaphone and a fire extinguisher and like he ready for anything yeah yeah and the whole time and then david kechner played my brother and we were just staring at him and then kechner went to get the set photographer to take a picture but he he looked at us it's kind of like when you catch someone doing something what You're like, what are you guys doing over there? No, that picture's no.
Starting point is 00:45:05 No, uh-uh. I had the fire extinguisher because I got a warning from the Glendale Police Department yesterday. True. Yeah. They told him fires were in the area? Well, we were in an old police department where you're not allowed to smoke. And so somebody's like, well, yeah, I guess you could do if you had a fire extinguisher there.
Starting point is 00:45:28 Okay, thank you. And just to be on the safe side, sir, a megaphone. Well, I need to be heard, Dave Foley. Yeah. Yeah, he's a first and last name guy, isn't he? Yeah. Well, he just calls you your character name.
Starting point is 00:45:46 And even when I see him now, it's amazing and the coolest because the show was a dream to be on. Also, when I was on Joey with Dave Foley, I couldn't believe it. I could not believe it. I was still bouncing at the time. But it was a dream to be on. What was the question? That thing of yours works.
Starting point is 00:46:03 Sorry. I'm with you now, brother brother this is why empathy's good i wanted to see where you're at hell yes hell yes but anytime okay i got it i'm rallying that must be a sativa anytime i see him now huh anytime i see him now he not only refers to me only as my character name in the best way he'll start asking me detailed questions about detective Fusco how are your brothers they're really good well how's your mom doing I'm like oh you know my brothers don't want to go over there oh wow detective is she doing the big dinners on Sunday and it's like this magical thing because we're like his creations and his characters and
Starting point is 00:46:43 then he he'll ask us and we're all just ready. He's got his own real life Sims going on. When you talk to him you have to go method like years after? I'm ready for anything and I'm Detective Fusco. I'm the giggling detective for life
Starting point is 00:47:03 and I can't believe he's there and I'm like, I'm going to wake up and this ain't real. I'm back at the Starbucks in Highlander, Franklin. I got fired from it. Oh, that's a nice Starbucks. No, they steal your tips and then if you, say, restrain somebody from taking your tips, they write you up for violating
Starting point is 00:47:20 your star skills. For real. Oh, yeah. I'm like, well, the guy takes our tips. I'm like, you can't restrain him. I'm like, well, are you going to reimburse us our tips?
Starting point is 00:47:30 They're like, no. I'm like, well, so he's just running out of our tips and that's an extra four bucks an hour here. And then shortly thereafter, I was asked to leave.
Starting point is 00:47:38 You were out. I was out. Oh, so anyway, I was explaining how a game works. Any whoozle. Okay, so I'm going to say how long something that's a length. And you guys get a guess. And the person closest without going over is the winner
Starting point is 00:48:05 And we'll start with you Martha You get to guess first because you won that last game And the question is How long Did the actors Who played the Oneeders I mean the Wonders How long
Starting point is 00:48:21 Did they rehearse together as a band Before Starting shooting Tom Hanks' directorial debut, That Thing You Do? How long did they rehearse as a band before the movie started? Yeah, they got together, they rehearsed, got ready to be a band together. And then I believe in the actual movie they it's all fake it's all fake voices and instruments I can't imagine why they did it at all but I'm gonna guess six months I apologize for laughing that's not how this game should work.
Starting point is 00:49:09 All right. Should I write that down? What do you think, Brandon? Like two months? You're asking me? You think I know? I meant to... I used the wrong punctuation. Two months. Okay. Is that... Two used the wrong punctuation. Two months.
Starting point is 00:49:26 Okay. Two M-O's. And Martha, you did six M-O's. All right. Dave? Six weeks, 14 hours. Oh. I like specificity.
Starting point is 00:49:42 Six weeks, 14 hours, you say? Yeah. That was a long day. It's whoever comes closest without going over, right? Yep. It's like Price is Right. Exactly like Price is Right with your friend Drew Carey. Eric?
Starting point is 00:49:57 Seven months, Doug. Did you hear me laugh at Martha's six months? I just know how they lie on sets about how hard they work to prepare. And it's bullshit 90% of the time. Like, yeah, we had them do army training. And you're like, I fired a gun and you said to bend over if my knee didn't hurt. No.
Starting point is 00:50:21 Bradley Cooper trained for two years to lower his voice. Two years to go other. I just did it. He watched. Just did it now. Two years, Bradley. He watched Sam Elliott movies
Starting point is 00:50:41 and then hired him to be in it so he could just listen to him and then repeat. Just say it back. I passive-aggressively started doing Instagram stories as Chris Christopherson after I read that. Just to show, like, darkness washed over the dude. Like, remember when you, there's not a day that goes by
Starting point is 00:51:01 I don't think about our lost little beauty queen, JonBenet. Chris did a JonBenet movie, the good one. Can I change my answer? Who was that? What was he talking about? He did Behind the Music, too. He did. Jerry checked into Betty Ford, but he never checked out.
Starting point is 00:51:27 Sad. Have you guys seen Green Room? If you want something terrible to happen to Eric check that movie out. I die in everything. You didn't die in Twin Peaks did you? No. I'm starting to live.
Starting point is 00:51:41 Alright good. You didn't die on Joey. Yeah. Got right, good. And you'd die on Joey. Yeah. Got dark season two. Martha, you had a question? Can I change my answer? Yes. I'm going to go six days.
Starting point is 00:52:01 Oh, wow. Does anybody else want to change? Anybody? You're all good? All right. Locked in? Want to switch yours to six months, Eric? Obviously, yeah. I thought it, but didn't want to say it. Take the six, yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:19 Okay. Well, to recap, Eric is not gonna win Brandon gave them too much Can I change it? Or did he? Can I change it to a month? Nope
Starting point is 00:52:40 Okay That's fine You're stuck with that answer Great Dave went six weeks and 14 hours, undercutting Brandon by about two weeks. And this is crazy because I wrote it down. I said it differently than you did, Brandon. Uh-huh.
Starting point is 00:52:58 But it's eight weeks. Oh! Two months! Great. You did it! Well done. You did it! Well done. You did it! Thank you.
Starting point is 00:53:09 Great. Huge. Super amazing. I was like, I was going to change my answer. Yeah. Well, one month. You still would have won one month, I think. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:18 I would have won. Dave would have won. Yeah. So you almost cost yourself the win. No, I'm happy. I'm happy with my decision. It really worked out great. Yeah. So you almost cost yourself the win. No, I'm happy. I'm happy with my decision. It really worked out great. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:27 Everybody's so happy. Everyone's so proud of me. Yeah. Great. So great. I love it. All right. You get to go first in our final game of this evening that's going to determine who the
Starting point is 00:53:40 winner is today and who all the prizes go to. And that game is, we haven't played it in a minute but I love it it's called Bennington and it's named after legendary radio personality Ron Bennington rest in peace I'm kidding he's alive but he's great and he
Starting point is 00:53:58 suggested this game to me and I love it here's how it works I'll name an actor or actress, and then each of you, starting with Brandon, and then we'll go to, which way are we going? We'll go to Martha, then Eric, and then Dave. You'll go around.
Starting point is 00:54:16 And also, we'll... Each of you will get a chance to go first in this game. But Brandon's gonna be first in the first round. Oh, my God. It's like watching The Rock on that Titans thing. No, he's good at explaining those things they have to climb on. I'll name somebody. You have to try to guess what's in their top three,
Starting point is 00:54:44 hopefully number one, top three movies at the box office of all time, domestic, according to boxofficemojo.com. Top three in order? After Adjusting for Inflation. Just one of the top three? Yeah, you name one movie,
Starting point is 00:55:01 and you're hoping it's in the top three. Because number one's worth three points, number two's worth two, number three's worth one. Great. And what do you think is in the top three, Brandon, of Mr. Zac Efron? Oh. He's a big favorite in these parts.
Starting point is 00:55:22 Probably, oh, shit. They call him the San Francisco tree. I'm gonna say... Can we say... Oh, 17 again. Okay. 17 again. Yeah, Zach's in there.
Starting point is 00:55:37 Yeah, good job. Thanks. Yeah. What do you think, Martha? Does anyone know the name of the one where he's in a fraternity next door to some
Starting point is 00:55:52 neighbors who don't like him? It's called Neighbors. Don't tell her. Don't tell her. Quiet VR people. I actually think it might not be in the top three, but I'll guess Neighbors.
Starting point is 00:56:06 Okay. Oh. He's in that. Eric? Old Grandpa. Oh, it's Dirty Grandpa. Dirty Grandpa? It's definitely not in the top three.
Starting point is 00:56:18 This is a panel who's going to help each other, I think. Let's all get through this together. So is that your final answer? Final answer. Dirty Grandpa. Old Dirty Grandpa. ODG. You down with ODG?
Starting point is 00:56:34 You know me. Dave, what do you think? What was that other movie? Oh, yes! That one! Everybody's got one in their heads, but don't say them out loud. It's just between the people on stage. I'm sorry if you weren't aware of that. I can give you a hint.
Starting point is 00:56:55 Is that legal? No. Is that legal? Will you stop saying something? Then I'm gonna have to go. Oh, yeah, good point. I'm gonna have to... But no, there's no lifelines in this game. Then Natalie, apologies. I'm going to have to go with Neighbors 2.
Starting point is 00:57:15 That's the only other movie I can think of. That's how the game was played, I think. That's a smart answer. If it's in the top three. Yeah. We'll see. I've got it written down right here. Is this just one round of this game?
Starting point is 00:57:26 Nope. Oh. It's going to go on for... It's going to go for hours. We've got... Let's see how much time we've got left. Yeah, we've got time. Not hours, but it's going to go for four rounds
Starting point is 00:57:42 and then a tiebreaker if necessary. Yeah, so everybody has a decent shot of doing well in this. So far, it's not going great. But we do have some points on the board because coming in at number three is Neighbors. This looks good for me. Oh, you think the sequel made more than the original?
Starting point is 00:58:11 Yeah. Does that happen? That does happen. Oh, yeah. Empire Strikes Back. Maybe that rings a bell. Yeah. I bet you after adjusting
Starting point is 00:58:20 for inflation, the original Star Wars is still higher. Why don't you shut up? Why don't you shut up? for inflation, the original Star Wars is still fire. Why don't you shut up? Why don't you shut up? Okay, so
Starting point is 00:58:29 Martha has one point. And coming in at number two for Mr. Efron is The Greatest Showman. The Greatest Showman. Yes. That was fun. I watched that on cable and have so many complaints.
Starting point is 00:58:48 But I still like it. And then coming in at number one, Dr. Seuss' The Lorax. Who knew Zac Efron was in that? And has a voice that should be in an animated movie. Did he just play Zac Efron? I thought that it was like Zac Efron vehicles. What do you mean? Like what kind of cars does he drive?
Starting point is 00:59:13 What's in his top three cars? I thought it was like top billed Zac Efron movies. I mean, I wouldn't have guessed the Lorax. No, that's a shock on two levels. One, that Zac Efron's in it. And two, that's a shock on two levels. One, that Zac Efron's in it, and two, that someone saw it. Yeah, it was incredibly popular.
Starting point is 00:59:30 It made more money than The Greatest Showman or Neighbors. But let me just re-explain, or be clear with Brandon, that it's... You just want to guess a movie that they're in in any way, shape, or form. If they're in it enough to be
Starting point is 00:59:45 recognized. Sure. I'm not going to put people that, you know, like, what's his name? But laughter No example ready. laughter laughter But I think
Starting point is 01:00:01 you know what I mean. Okay, so what order were we going in there okay so Martha gets to go first in this next round and she's the only one with one point it's 0-0-0 yeah and the crowd goes wild
Starting point is 01:00:18 we got a long way to go and a short time to get there watch old bandit run coming in our second name We got a long way to go and a short time to get there. Watch old bandit run. Coming in, our second name, starting with you, Martha, is the films of Rob Riggle. Rob Riggle, hilarious dude. Been on this show. Character actor, appears in a lot of things.
Starting point is 01:00:46 Also football. on this show character actor appears in a lot of things also football got any wriggles I can picture him on the screen but there he is what's he wearing is he in There he is. What's he wearing? Is he in... I don't see a lot of movies, so...
Starting point is 01:01:13 He's in... I can't. I'm going to pass. Okay. Sorry. That's fair. You're way out in the lead, so don't worry about it. What do you think, Eric? 21 Jump Street.
Starting point is 01:01:30 What? I thought it wasn't... Was Riggle in that? No, that's... I thought it was Martha and then me. I'm pissed off. Again. Yeah, we're going around that way now
Starting point is 01:01:45 I was so ready you'll get to go first last though so that's that's always great who's next you are sir me
Starting point is 01:01:53 what was that movie where they were like marines on horseback in Afghanistan oh right I always every time I saw
Starting point is 01:02:02 a poster for that movie I was like that's gonna be a bitch to remember on my show. Because it's got a long title. Yeah. The men who rode some horses into battle, and it worked out okay.
Starting point is 01:02:13 And then fell from grace to the sea. I think it did. I don't know. Did they win that battle with the horses? I think they won it. Why would you make the movie if they lost? That's not America. God.
Starting point is 01:02:24 I don't know what that thing's called, but I'll save you a little trouble and say it's not in his top three. Okay. You know, I love Rob Riggle. Wait, what did Eric say? 21 Jump Street. Just don't see it here.
Starting point is 01:02:44 But I can't think of any movies Rob's in at all. Yeah, no, he just kind of pops into stuff. He's always great. Okay, Brandon, do you have one? 21 Jump Street 2. Oh, my God. 22 Jump Street. 22 Jump Street.
Starting point is 01:03:01 I get to say it. 22 Jump Street. You I get to say it. 22 Jump Street. You did get to say that. But is he in it? Well, which one of us got that guess? Well, because I said it. We just got to go to the judges. That's just me, unfortunately.
Starting point is 01:03:18 I thought of one he might be in. Oh. We don't. This isn't. This is. We're in a serious juncture in the show where everybody's playing to win, so I can't really help you out there, Martha. But like I said, you're still way in the lead.
Starting point is 01:03:39 Coming in at number three, 22 Jump Street! Okay. Oh, yeah, it's not mine. So now Brandon's on the board with one. And then Rob Riggle's number two, of course. I don't know why you guys didn't think of this, is Dr. Seuss' The Lorax. And that was the other guy's number one.
Starting point is 01:04:05 So Riggle's got one bigger. Yeah, Riggle's got something bigger, and it's called, his number one is The Hangover. Oh. He's the guy that, you know, tasers Zach Galifianakis and then laughs about it. Is he in the scene with Brody? Oh, yeah, Brody's in there.
Starting point is 01:04:21 You got it. Positive energy. Yeah. Enjoy it. The Hangover. I love when, I love seeing Brody's in there You got it positive energy Enjoy it The hangover I love seeing Brody do a set where he just reenacts That scene verbatim You know what
Starting point is 01:04:34 They call this place Loserville Hangover one In it hangover two in it Funny people got cut out of it What about hangover 3? I don't know. I don't think he's in it. I don't think he is either.
Starting point is 01:04:48 He's in Due Date. Hmm? He's in Due Date? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. I'm a big Brody Stevens fan. This isn't Brody Stevens movies. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:04:56 But that was a fun detour. And for recapping purposes, Brandon, you have one, Martha has one, and Dave and Eric are still struggling to be relevant. You got this.
Starting point is 01:05:12 Wait, where are we at now? Dave gets to go first, right? I do? Because Eric went first on the last one, didn't he? Eric goes first? Yes. What the fuck is with you people? Eric goes first? Yes. Okay. What the fuck is with you people?
Starting point is 01:05:32 Wait, but who went first on that last round? It's not a huge... I think Martha did, right? Martha did? Yeah. I went first the first round. No, wait. No, you're right. They're right.
Starting point is 01:05:39 Doug, it definitely shouldn't be Dave. Did I fuck up? I did go first the very last round. Both times? I read the handbook on the way here, and it definitely isn be Dave. Did I fuck up? I did go first the very last time. Both times? I read the handbook on the way here and it definitely isn't Dave. No, I didn't go first
Starting point is 01:05:52 because it was... No, I went first but I passed. You did. You still went first. That threw me off. I apologize. You still went first.
Starting point is 01:05:59 So I should not have let her go first but everything worked out great. Dave, you're up first. Okay. Because Eric kind of was. Eric kind of was last round. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:13 All right, so what do you think of the films? Can you tell me what's in the top three of the films of Ed Helms? Ed Helms, of course, The Office was a TV show that he was on. The Hangover. Okay. A little louder next time, though. Brandon? The Hangover 2.
Starting point is 01:06:37 Interesting. Martha? I'm going to get off the hangover train and say vacation. Although I'm not entirely sure that's the title, but it is based on the old National Lampoon Vacation, but it's a new one. Yep, they did do that. Is it called National Lampoon's Vacation?
Starting point is 01:07:03 I don't think this time around it was, but I'd accept either. All right, I'll do both. Okay. Eric? I believe Ed Helms had a small part in The 40-Year-Old Virgin. Really? With little confidence. What did he do?
Starting point is 01:07:21 It seems like something he'd be in. Oh, okay. I think he played Catherine Keener in every other scene. It was a bold choice, but kind of cool. It was weird, but I loved it. Alright. Alright.
Starting point is 01:07:37 Congratulations to whoever said The Hangover. It was me. That's three points for Dave Because that's number one And then congratulations to whoever said Hangover part two Which I believe was Martha
Starting point is 01:07:52 No I said Congratulations to Martha So Alright so that's two more points For Brandon so that's exciting And then Let's see. Oh, his number three movie?
Starting point is 01:08:09 As it turns out, Dr. Seuss is the Lorax. I don't know. It's like everybody but us It's starting to hurt Dave and Brandon now are in the lead In a tie with three points each And then Martha has one And Eric, thank you for joining us
Starting point is 01:08:35 Thank you for being here, Eric And Brandon, this is your chance to go first You can really bring this home Because it's the films of Danny DeVito. That short guy. That he's in. Not that he directed.
Starting point is 01:08:54 Yeah. I don't know. He hasn't directed anything that would be in his top three. So we don't need to worry about it. Batman, right? Batman. Yeah. top three, so we don't need to worry about it. Batman, right? What? Batman. Returns.
Starting point is 01:09:10 Yeah. Everybody was getting so pissed off. I mean, they just know you gotta say the right words. Returns. And Batman was wrong. But he is, of course, and Batman returns. Martha? The great Danny DeVito.
Starting point is 01:09:27 I'm trying to guess between Throw Mama from the Train and Twins. And I'm not getting any response from the audience that would help. There's a real interesting attempt there. I'm just gonna go... Get them to tell you. I'm just gonna go get them to tell you. I'm just gonna go with
Starting point is 01:09:46 I'm gonna go with twins. Okay. Now you support that choice. I'm gonna say romancing the stone. So serious. I'm at zero
Starting point is 01:10:05 I'm going to say Jewel of the Nile The sequel of course Alright this is I'm really excited about what's going to happen here Because I haven't gone yet I don't think yet, but...
Starting point is 01:10:25 I don't think you're going to win. Fair enough. Sorry, Natalie. What do you think, Dave? The films of Dave DeVito. Now, you've taken Romancing the Stone out of the running. And Twins and Batman Returns. The Twins was also ready.
Starting point is 01:10:42 You've already been picked. This is not going to win But it's a good movie War of the Roses That is good, he directed it, he's in it And it's a good movie Yeah, I like that movie a lot He's also in Cuckoo's Nest
Starting point is 01:10:56 But I didn't think that adjusted for inflation Probably not Alright, so Danny DeVito's number one You can't guess again is it too late to change it to the you can't change it i keep forgetting that that's the one god damn it i even said at the beginning you know david you know that short guy almost said he's like a lorax but I didn't because that would be too much
Starting point is 01:11:26 of a clue. I could feel the wheels turning. I was thinking the same. Isn't he the Lorax? Yeah. He is the titular character in the Lorax. He's the tit. He's the tit. He's the tit in the Lorax. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. I always say that
Starting point is 01:11:41 about him. Danny DeVito, he's the tit. Oh, let's see how I want to reveal this. Twins, I'm sorry, came in at number five. That's unbelievable. But I changed it to the Lorax, so... Which is funny, because that came in at number six. Yeah, DeVito's been killing it.
Starting point is 01:12:04 He doesn't need no fucking Lorax. I mean, his number three is Austin Powers in Goldmember. Oh. Which I guess he has a cameo in or something. Yeah, I forgot about that. His number one, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. Oh, wow. The 70s was a glorious period
Starting point is 01:12:33 for film. You're right. Films like that were huge box office hits. I'm sorry, I just wanted to be an old man for a few seconds. Yeah, the movie was huge
Starting point is 01:12:44 and then they adjusted for inflation and it makes it number a few seconds. Yeah, the movie's huge, and then they adjust it for inflation and it makes it number one. But coming in at number two, you did it, Brandon. Great. Batman Returns. Yes. So that means Brandon gets a couple extra points, bringing him to five total, which makes him the winner today!
Starting point is 01:13:06 Oh. Great. I am sorry I ever doubted you. I know you did. Did you... You guys remember that? Yeah. No, I totally doubted you. And that's what's great. I love an underdog story. And I love
Starting point is 01:13:22 this Billing Them Softly poster very much. and it's actually got scoot McNary's name on there he's been a guest on this show but one more time for Brandon Wardell for winning oh the billing them softly doesn't have a shithead on the back do you want to do you want to write it down on here I I'll give you a pen and everything. Come on down here, dude. How you doing, Bill?
Starting point is 01:13:48 You can just write right here on the stage if you want. Do you want a gray Sharpie or a black one? Take the black one. And yeah, write down whoever you want there for me to call a shithead here at the end. And thanks. And let's say hello again and get some plugs for Mr. Eric Edelstein. What's tomorrow night?
Starting point is 01:14:12 Tomorrow night, We Bare Bears Live. We Bare Bears Live. Yes. Woo. Which venue is that at? The Marines Memorial Theater. Ooh, that's nice. No, I do like that place.
Starting point is 01:14:28 I've been there a few times and I might, you know, not to get you all excited or anything, but I might come by tomorrow night. I'd be so fired up. That sounds like fun. Holy shit. Matt, thank you for being here, dude. Thank you. Dave Foley, what do you got to plug? Well, it's Story Pirates tomorrow morning.
Starting point is 01:14:46 Now, isn't it true, though, that a lot of pirates are cunts? Yeah. I mean, they steal and they're just mean people. They pillage and... I can't remember the lyrics to the song.
Starting point is 01:14:58 But they're not good people, pirates. Totally. Totally. As a breed. I'm not sure if they're bred, but somehow they get pirates and they're not nice. But your show's gonna be fun for the whole family. Yeah, it's a family show.
Starting point is 01:15:12 The bottom line. Totally family show. It's not your podcast. Don't say the C word. No, it's not. Don't say cunt. Okay. How's that listed on iTunes or whatever? We don't know yet. We haven't launched it. Don't say blank with Paul and Dave. Oh, don't say blank with Paul and Dave. I like that because the blank could change. Yeah, but it probably
Starting point is 01:15:28 won't because that's a lot of work. Okay, Bill. Brandon? Yeah, but still, my podcast. You can listen to my podcast on the internet you know and uh i don't really have any uh exciting finish yeah this is like well you know this is i i did my uh shows last night so i don't really have any sf dates to plug and uh i don't, I probably won't be on the road until like March or something, but just go online
Starting point is 01:16:07 and search my name and then go from there. Just keep in mind that a lot of people who don't leave their houses are watching or listening to this. Yeah, just follow me on all the websites.
Starting point is 01:16:20 Yeah. Go on the web. See if there's some Brandon Wardell in your area. I forgot to mention the Who's Live Anyway gigs coming up. So let's go see those Who's Live Anyway gigs. And also
Starting point is 01:16:32 there's going to be something coming up this next year with the kids in the hall. Yes. Is it going to be a murder? Are you sick of each other? And Martha Kelly, what do you got to plug? Tonight at 10.30, which is past a lot of people's bedtimes, including mine,
Starting point is 01:16:58 I will be at Cobb's Comedy Club with Mary Lynn Rice Cobb and Dwayne Perkins. Bob's Comedy Club with Mary Lynn Rice Cobb and Dwayne Perkins. And then I'm in a movie that may or may not ever get distributed. Oh, tell us. But it's supposed it's going to be coming out after the end of this month. It's called Corporate Animals and it stars Demi Moore and Jessica Williams and Ed Helms. And so I don't, I've never tried to promote a movie. I don't know if this is the best way to do it. And also, no, I might hardly be in it.
Starting point is 01:17:30 I haven't seen it. I might have been cut out. And then that's... On the set of that movie, did you work with Ed Helms? Yeah, a little bit. Did he talk a lot about how much money Vacation made? I would like to pin my heartbreaking loss
Starting point is 01:17:46 on him, but I can't. Can I plug one movie? Yeah. There's this movie I Love You Daddy. Okay, this is... This is not the time.
Starting point is 01:18:02 I'm sorry. Wait, I mean, it's absolutely not available for anybody to see, right? You can find it. Yeah? Yeah. You can steal it?
Starting point is 01:18:08 Because that's how I'd like to watch it. Yeah, I think you can find it. I think it's literally just all on YouTube now. Oh, really? Yeah. I'm sorry I said that. I didn't mean to. I feel bad now.
Starting point is 01:18:22 This isn't live or anything. Oh, it is just for today, actually. Right. I really thought you had a movie to plug, buddy. No. Okay. And then what's going on with Baskets, Martha, the best show? We are shooting season four starting in February,
Starting point is 01:18:51 and then probably it'll be on the TV in early June. We might all be dead by then, let's face it. But if we're not, just because of Trump, don't kid yourselves. But if we're alive, it'll be on FX probably this summer. Cool. Yeah. I love it. Oh, and we'll see you tomorrow at the Benson Movie Interruption.
Starting point is 01:19:17 Right. Of Fifty Shades Freed. Are you excited about that? I'm really uncomfortable. It's a sex movie, and I'm super uncomfortable. So I can't wait. I mean, if it's anything like the first two parts, there's not that much sex. And you could, you know,
Starting point is 01:19:33 maybe run out of the room for a few minutes during the uncomfortable parts. Honestly, for a movie that claims to be a very horny movie, Fifty Shades of Grey, it feels like it was written by somebody that's never had sex. Yeah, because the girl would not sign the contract. That's how the first movie ends.
Starting point is 01:19:58 Will you sign my love contract? I'll think about it. Elevator doors close. Credits. What? I just sat through that? But we're doing it. We're watching the third one tomorrow.
Starting point is 01:20:09 And bless you if that was a sneeze in the audience. Oh, could I just say, for fans of the Fifty Shades of Grey franchise, check out porn. Just a suggestion. I'm sitting here looking at the clock going, why do we have a few minutes left? What did I do wrong? Because usually I time it out pretty good. And I forgot to ask you guys,
Starting point is 01:20:38 do you guys mind staying for a few more minutes? I forgot to ask everybody what the last movie they saw was. So, raise your hand if you remember. Because it's sometimes it catches you off guard.
Starting point is 01:20:52 It's hard. It's like that question, what'd you have for breakfast? Can I confer with my wife? Yeah. What? What? What?
Starting point is 01:21:02 You could say, you, the favorite. Yeah, mine was the favorite. Was it? Yeah. say... The favorite. Yeah, mine was the favorite. Was it? Yeah. Was it your favorite? I really enjoyed it.
Starting point is 01:21:09 It's really fun. I loved The Lobster. It was a great movie, and I thought this was really fun. And I'll have to plug my own show again. They said cunt a lot in it. Eric? Hard to follow.
Starting point is 01:21:27 I just saw the Pope of Greenwich Village. Oh, at the New Beverly? It reopened, yeah. And oh my gosh, it was incredible. It took my thumbs. It took my thumbs, Charlie.
Starting point is 01:21:36 It took my thumbs, Charlie. So good. I had no idea Eric Roberts was, wow. Yeah. So good. Yeah, he's phenomenally irritating in that movie.
Starting point is 01:21:46 Oh, man. No, like if you knew him. You know what I mean? Like the character's a very unpleasant guy, but he means well. Yeah, and I went down a big Google rabbit hole of Eric Roberts, and apparently he will literally do anything now where he will star in Realtors videos showing houses. This is not a joke.
Starting point is 01:22:04 He's proud of it. I think it's awesome. I think it's a character actor ethos, especially, you know, they pay us a little less nowadays. But yeah, if you have a home to show, Eric Roberts will show up. He's like, yeah, I just show up
Starting point is 01:22:14 and it's my wife and kids for the day and I go home and hopefully they sell the house. Check clears. And if you can't get Eric, call me. In, in. If you can't get Dave, call me. In. If you can't get Dave, call me. My rate's a lot lower.
Starting point is 01:22:26 Yeah. I gotta catch up on my wife. And then, Brandon, what was the last movie you saw? I'm like, I'm racking my brain. Right? It can be tough to think of sometimes. It's hard. Because I go to the movies.
Starting point is 01:22:42 It sounds like I've never been to the movies before. I've been to a theater and seen a movie. Watched the whole thing, didn't you? I mean, I remember I was home for the holidays and showed my parents 8th grade. Great movie.
Starting point is 01:23:00 What, you mean you open up your annual and they... Yearbook? Fuck. Wrong word. Do they have yearbooks in 8th grade? What, you mean you open up your annual yearbook? Fuck. Yeah. Wrong word. Do they have yearbooks in eighth grade? I think they do, right? What's that?
Starting point is 01:23:11 They have yearbooks that early, eighth grade? Yeah, they have yearbooks in elementary school. What? What about pre-K? Do they have yearbooks? I don't think so. We don't do that in Canada. But that movie, Eighth Grade, oh boy.
Starting point is 01:23:25 So good. That's great. Yeah. I hope it gets a screenplay nomination at the Oscars. Yeah. That'd be cool. Martha, what do you think? Last night on the plane, I re-watched Moana, and it's fantastic.
Starting point is 01:23:38 Yeah. True. I actually did just... I remembered what the last movie... It's Martha's turn. I'm sorry. Leave. She has a I remembered what the last movie was. It's Martha's turn. Leave. She has a lot more to say about Moana.
Starting point is 01:23:51 It is so, Moana's really good. Yeah. I loved it. But what were you going to say? No, I did just remember the last movie I watched, and it's a bad answer, but I,
Starting point is 01:24:04 like, I, somebody showed me Garden State for the first time and it sucks. It doesn't hold up. It fucking, it's so bad. The original documentary or the dramatized film about the documentary? No, you're thinking of Grey Gardens.
Starting point is 01:24:20 Grey Gardens, that's right. Because I was going to figure, why are you so down on Grey Gardens. Grey Gardens. That's right. Oh, no, I'm... Yeah. Because I was going to figure, why are you so down on... Grey Gardens is pretty good. Yeah, I don't know. I'm sorry to... was Zach Braff's directorial debut. Natalie Portman was in it.
Starting point is 01:24:39 Yeah. And mostly known for, apparently, the soundtrack. It, like, invented the Manic Pixie Dream Girl. Yeah, that too. And then it was like, yeah, the soundtrack, It like invented the Manic Pixie Dream Girl. Yeah, that too. And then it was like, yeah, the soundtrack, a lot of the shins, a lot of like, Natalie Portman
Starting point is 01:24:52 is random. She plays somebody who, she literally in the movie is like, oh, sorry, I'm random. And I was like, I got very, I got really mad. That movie ruined a lot of good music for me. Yeah. I can't listen to the Shins now.
Starting point is 01:25:08 No. And they're a good band. Oh, they're a great band. What do you think of the ankles? You know what? All right. You should put on a Shins album and then watch Grey Gardens. Just to right yourself with the Shins album and then watch Grey Gardens. Just to write yourself
Starting point is 01:25:26 with the Shins. That's a perfect place to leave this. One more time for Eric Edelstein, Dave Foley, Brandon Wardell, Martha Kelly. Sam! Sam, come get all your stuff. Holy crap. You won so
Starting point is 01:25:44 much stuff. Come get it, Sam. Sorry, Nat. Or one of Sam's representatives. Someone that knows Sam. Oh, there you are. Hi. Congratulations. This one's really heavy.
Starting point is 01:25:55 So be careful of that. And good luck with all of it. I hope you can get through customs. If you travel to be here. And yeah, I don't have anything else that I want to plug other than the usual douglovesmovies.com. Congratulations, Sam. And as always, Office Depot is a shithead.
Starting point is 01:26:24 That's a great poster. Pop-Tarts without frosting is a shithead. That's a great poster. Pop-Tarts without frosting is a shithead. And people who drive white Ford Explorers and trick me into thinking they are a police car behind me are shitheads.
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Starting point is 01:27:14 See you next time. No I won't. It's only audio. Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky. There's no room in his heart for you. Cause Doug loves movies!

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