Doug Loves Movies - Esther Ku, Matt Fernandez and Chris Crespo guest
Episode Date: September 10, 2015Live from The Improv in Orlando, Doug welcomes Esther Ku, Matt Fernandez and Chris Crespo to the show. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https:...//art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy
wrappers, greenie babies, sticky
seeds with 50 azapop or
kernels in his teeth. There's
still not one that he
won't see, cause Doug
loves movies
Hey, hey, hey everybody
This looked like the main one.
I assumed it was beyond.
My name is Doug, and I love movies.
This is Doug Loves Movies!
Very good.
Some guy wrote to me recently on Twitter and said,
hey, you know what?
You should get everybody to sing
This is Doug Loves Movies to the tune of This Is How We Do It.
And I wrote back to the guy,
that's what they are doing.
So that was a fun exchange.
But it just gets a little shouty,
so it loses a little bit of the melody.
But we know it's under there, deep, deep down.
We are back, coming to you once again from the improv in Orlando, Florida
Had a great time the last time I was here and I'm glad I'm finally finally back. It's Wednesday, September 9th
2015 mm-hmm finally back. It's Wednesday, September 9th, 2015. My voice is a little extra shot tonight
because I spent today in Harry Potter land. And it fucks up your voice when you spend
all day yelling at children.
And one of the lines today,
the line for the Incredible Adventure of Harry Potter
or whatever that thing's called.
Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey.
Yeah.
Which we all, they let lots of people take,
even though it's a forbidden journey.
They let people jump right on.
They barely mention it.
It's in the fine print.
Someone had told me that they got sick on that ride,
and I was kind of surprised,
because they shake you around a lot,
but it's mostly digital projection, right?
Like when you're flying around,
you're not really flying around.
projection, right? Like when you're flying around, you're not really flying around.
So I was in line for that ride and there was the queue, as they call it, was quite empty. So you know how you end up just walking back and forth in all these tunnels that are Harry Potter themed?
Well, every few steps would be like a painting or a statue or some shit.
And at one point I was behind a guy that would just stop and turn and take a picture of every single thing.
There's nobody ahead of him.
I'm just behind him.
And he never once noticed that he was holding me up every time he stopped to take a picture of everything.
I started laughing about how he would take a picture of anything.
At one point, he didn't take a picture of a suitcase that was just sitting there.
I was shocked.
I was like, why did you get a shot of that sweet bag?
Let me see your name tags, Florida.
Wow.
There's some good ones what is this it's oil cans and
you're dressed up like Nave and Johnson in the jerk that is really is that gonna
be your yeah you have a dog named Shithead Is that Is that your Halloween costume this year?
Like, are you excited that it's already worked out?
Or
Or did you really do that just special
Just for this?
Could be Halloween
I think it should be, you got the cans and everything
He hates these cans
Good job, Navin
What's your actual name?
Chris
Fair enough these cans. Good job, Navin. What's your actual name? Chris. Alright.
Fair enough.
Carly Knights instead of
Boogie Knights. It's nicely done.
Nice poster. Yeah.
Jeff to Smoochie.
That means your name is
Smoochie.
Gardeins of
the Galaxy. I like that.
Sandy instead of Wall-E. There's lots of good ones, you guys. Yeah. I like that. Sandy instead of Wall-E.
There's lots of good ones, you guys.
Yeah, I'm impressed.
Somebody's lighting something up over there.
But I still can't tell what it is.
It's Lara Croft, right?
Tomb Raider?
Tom Raider.
And you're Tom Raider.
That sounds like a Republican candidate for something.
Vote for Tom Rader.
Racing to make America good.
Again.
All right, well, I've got a prize bag in my hands and a cocktail.
So let me get rid of my Tito's and soda for a second
so I can tell you guys about what's in the prize bag tonight.
This is stuff I brought.
All the guests brought some stuff as well,
but this is what you're going to get for sure
from my end of the bargain.
A copy of my CD promotional tool,
a copy of a book that
I should have gone to Disneyland today
now that I think about it.
But this is a book called The E-Ticket Life by Kyle Burbank.
And it's all about his adventures at all the different Disney parks.
I'll probably go to Magic Kingdom tomorrow.
When I was in Kansas City recently, I did a benefit from Roller Derby.
And they gave
me a personalized jersey that I'll never wear.
Yeah, it's nice.
It's really nice.
Like, somebody would actually wear something like this.
And they even gave me my own nickname and number.
They called me number 420, the Dean of Green.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
Fountain City
Roller Derby, you guys,
in Kansas City, Missouri.
Also, a gentleman
along the road somewhere gave me
a Puffington's golf ball,
and it's a fake golf ball
you can put your stash in.
I got a gift card for iTunes a $15 gift card for iTunes so you could purchase premium episodes of
Douglas movies or or the Benson interruption or you can get a album by
juice Newton this thing somebody explained to me what it was I still
don't...
Oh, I think I get it now.
You put this on the side of your golf bag,
and it's like a hand towel on your golf bag.
So that lets a lot of you out.
Who here is a really huge stoner who also golfs?
Okay, I hope you win the bag tonight, dude.
Because you have
this, it's from the Mad Dabbler.
It's a
premier online glass
gallery, but they made these for some reason.
So you could dry your hands off
while you're, after you
spit in them while you're rolling up
a spliff out on the links.
I got a pink wristband that's from the Taylor Swift, her current tour.
I draw the line at pink wristbands if it was a different color.
And then, I don't even know what this is.
I think it's refrigerator magnets or something.
But it's some little trinket associated with
a movie I enjoy a great deal called The World's
End.
Yeah, so all of that stuff
is up for grabs
tonight, you guys. And then
my guests all brought stuff as well.
Let's get them out here,
shall we? Please give a big warm
welcome to Chris Crespo,
Matt Fernandez, and Esther Koo
everybody. Let's hear it for them.
Thank you.
Alright.
Hey Doug. Hey that's Matt All right.
Hey, Doug.
Hey, that's Matt Fernandez, everybody. Hey.
Who I can officially call a return guest to the program,
but unofficially say not really,
because parts of his episode, parts where he
was very funny,
got lost
after a
power surge in
Tampa, Florida.
I just refer to Tampa, Florida
as a power surge.
I feel like the episode was too
good and the internet just
wasn't ready.
It needs to age, it needs to age, or an actual copy of it needs to exist.
So yeah, that's a sort of lost episode, so it's great to finally have you back here in...
Yeah, you guys don't have to clap or anything, assholes.
Orlando! Come on, Orlando!
Shut down SeaWorld, Orlando.
Come on.
So also joining us for its first appearances all the way,
the rest of the way.
So let's talk first to Esther Koo, everybody.
You know her.
You know her from Girl Code and the
Jack McBrayer
and Triumph
Show. Hi, Doug.
And the Jim Gaffigan show.
You were on that. Yes.
And you were at
Harry Potter World today. I was.
I saw you there. I saw you there.
Yeah, yeah.
Great story, guys. Just top you there. Yeah, yeah. And. Great story, guys.
Just top notch.
True story, bro.
But we also, we did some time in Simpsons World.
And skated through Dr. Seuss land.
Hung out in Marvel territory for a bit.
We caught in line.
No, we didn't.
Yeah, because.
When? Your fans like got you high. Oh, that's true bit. We cut in line. No, we didn't. Yeah, because your fans got you high.
Oh, that's true.
There was one long line.
There was kind of a long line to get into the
let's get the shit to Gringotts or whatever it's called.
Last train to Gringotts.
And there was a bit of a line for that one.
And we just never made eye contact with the people behind us
after we cut them.
Well, no, but it was friendly cutting.
When two people invite two other people to stand with them in line, it's not that big of a deal.
And then immediately regret it.
Yeah.
No, but it was fine.
I wonder if they're here.
They're the only people that recognize me all day long.
And it was funny because the guy was wearing a tie-dye shirt.
So it's like, of course that guy's gonna recognize me um but uh yeah thanks for uh going with me
to that place today that was uh it was a fun time that was fun yeah dropping donuts just epic
storytelling too too good it was that kind of day though where everything went pretty smoothly so there
isn't like a story i think i have like a mini concussion from all the rides we went on we went
a lot of rides because we had the express thing and everybody's in school so it's like your problems
are so real i mean it was crazy, man.
It was like the express lane was slowing us down.
It was only rich people there today.
You guys know what I'm talking about, right?
Yeah, no, everybody loved her hat.
She had a great hat on.
It was a good time.
Oh, I forgot to mention this at the top of the show.
Then I'm going to introduce our third guest.
You can wait, sweet.
Yeah, just hang on a second, Chris.
Boston is my next stop,
where I'm going to be doing Doug Lowe's movies
this Saturday at 420 at the Wilbur Theater.
And then I've got stand-up shows all next Sunday through Wednesday,
Providence, Hartford, Richmond, and Virginia Beach.
Doug Loves Movies for all my tour dates and deets.
And a round of applause, please, for another first-time guest,
Chris Crespo, everybody.
Hey, how's it going, guys?
How are you doing?
Sweet.
He is
a film
podcaster
as well
and has
a Twitter
account to
match,
right?
Yes,
Crespo Diso.
Crespo,
Crespo Diso.
Crespo Diso.
As in cinema,
Crespo Diso.
Yes, sir.
It's very,
very sophisticated
name.
Very catchy, very easy to remember.
There's too many letters in that.
That's why it doesn't fit on Twitter.
I had to go with Jesper Crespo Diso.
Dropped the cinema.
Did you ever see Why Don't You Play in Hell or Go Play in Hell?
I don't know the exact title.
Doug just made up this movie to insult you.
Why don't you go get hit by a car?
Have you ever seen Chris can you fuck yourself right now
missed that one
missed it
oh well if you ever get a chance to check it out
it's like a kung fu version
of it's like a tribute to
cinema paradiso
but from the sort of a more of a
Tarantino kung fu kind of angle
I'm totally in for that that sounds amazing
yeah it's neat it's just another movie about a. That sounds amazing. Yeah, it's neat.
It's just another movie about a love of cinema,
but in this case, it's a love of extremely violent cinema.
Right up my alley, perfect.
And it's super awesome.
Now we just need a title.
How often do people, you have a co-host on the podcast?
Got a fellow named Drewster Cogburn
who helps me out with the show.
Oh, so we got some fans here in the audience.
A couple of Drewster Cogburn who helps me out with the show. Oh, so we got some fans here in the audience. A couple of Drewster Cogburn fans.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
People don't know which movie pun they like better so far.
Cinema Crespediso or that other one you just said a few times.
This happened.
Brewster McMut-
That's half the show.
That's what we just sit around.
Brewster McMurtry.
Yeah.
That's what we do. Brewster'surtry That's half the show That's what we just said around Brewster McMurtry Yeah That's what we do Brewster's Millions
Drewster's Millions
Oh that's a good one
Yeah there you go
Drew write that down
Write it down Drew
Drew it on a piece of paper
Draw
Is that why you call him
Drewster?
Now I get it
It makes more sense now
It all makes sense
And Chris What'd you bring for the prize bag? Well on our show Is that why you call him Drewster? Now I get it. It makes more sense now. It all makes sense.
And Chris, what did you bring for the prize bag?
Well, on our show. First time out on the show.
Whenever we have a guest on at the end of the show,
I give them a swag bag.
And it's always a whole bunch of...
It's always a bunch of cheap crap.
The value of this bag comes out to about eight bucks.
And that includes the bag, as a matter of fact.
The bag is actually pretty nice.
It's only a dollar.
The bag's the best part of your price.
It's pretty sweet.
It's a sweet bag.
I got the movie The Pink Panther.
Which one?
With Steve Martin.
Oh, fuck.
I got Orlando City Magnets.
Goes out a few extra things.
I got these Groucho Marx glasses.
Groucho Marx.
Three pack.
So fun for a whole family.
I got a lollipop that looks like a superhero.
Check that.
It looks like a superhero.
It's got a cape and everything.
It looks like it's been in your pocket for a week.
Oh, I've had this for a couple months now, as a matter of fact.
There's a candle in here.
Tell them about the necklace.
You should give away that necklace. It haven't taken off in 15 years.
That you shower with.
They're not getting the necklace.
They are getting a candle that's Caribbean Oasis scents.
I'm not sure what that scent is.
He hasn't taken his necklace off in 15 years.
Don't point at him.
He's a person.
And I'm sitting right here.
There's a dollar in here signed by Drew Cicogburn and some Cinema Crespo Niso stickers.
Why would I want
Drew's signature?
Thank you very much.
Show him some respect
while he's going
through his bag.
Put me down.
Let the man
sort through his bag
in peace.
Sort through my shit?
This is his first time
on the program.
He's not a comedian.
No.
You're doing...
People, remember that.
I am a film critic.
You're doing so good.
Thank you. Give me something to criticize and I'll do it.
I think I just broke your candle.
That's not my candle.
It's one of these people's candles.
Don't reach into the bag too quickly. Bag's on my hands.
It's not my problem anymore.
I love it.
Esther?
Yeah. Esther? Yeah.
Esther Koo?
What'd you bring?
I brought something for the prize bag.
I know, I offered to help carry it,
but she insisted that she trudge it over here.
All right.
Look at that.
Jesus Christ.
I made a gift basket
because your fans are always so nice
and always offer me weed when I'm on the road.
So I just want to give back to the Doug Benson fan community
with a gift bag, and I have a couple movies in here.
Have you guys seen Smiley Face?
Yeah, with Anna Faris.
Anna Faris gets high on weed brownies.
Sure.
And that's a good, you know. I have Mr Faris gets high on weed brownies. Sure. And that's like, you know,
I have Mr. Popper's penguins in here.
I'll tell you why.
Oh, there's a reason?
Okay, because I got to be like a featured extra
for one second with Jim Carrey,
and I made eye contact with Jim Carrey and I made eye contact
with Jim Carrey
who is my comedic hero.
And then what happened?
Boring.
Okay, I also have
I also have Titanic
because
Well, there's a movie for every mood in there.
So, I brought Titanic because I remember when this movie came out,
the pastor at my church told us not to go see it
because Hollywood spent millions of dollars on a movie
and they should have given that money to God, he said.
He has a point.
I left the church and fuck it,
I can watch Titanic whenever I want.
And so can you.
Titanic was kind of worth all that money,
but all these political campaigns
that are going on now
for hundreds of millions of dollars,
why not give that to the poor?
What is wrong with our country?
It's very weird.
But she also included a bunch of candy in this bag.
Well, I also have one of my t-shirts
that I tie-dyed.
It's called Fisting the Night Away t-shirt.
In here.
They're really cute, you guys.
That's my parody song
of Sam Cooke's Twisting the Night Away.
Fisting the Night Away.
Now it
makes more sense.
And then
I also have another t-shirt
and it arrived after I
made the gift basket, so
it's kind of like lying out
here. This is
a t-shirt for my new podcast,
Coup and the Gang.
Brand new podcast.
Yeah.
Like how many episodes have you done?
I've done two episodes.
There you go.
It's already got a shirt.
My show still might not have it.
Oh, we have a shirt.
Well, thanks for bringing all...
You can pass that down, too, the shirt,
unless you want to wear it on your knees.
No, that's okay.
All right, cool.
I'll bear my scars.
Thank you for bringing all that stuff.
And, oh, you can pass the bag down, too, I guess.
Yes.
They're going to need that.
Somebody...
I was saying this backstage.
Someone's going to wander out of here
with, like, four bags
and just look homeless.
We'll try to get you a cart to put them all in.
Matt, what's in your...
Probably the nicest of all the bags.
Will you hold my drink?
You are nice.
Thank you.
I'm going to get that back from you.
Don't drink it.
I brought a slap koozie cigar city comedy yeah you slap it around your favorite ice cold beverage uh that's
just fun to do yeah you know i brought a sticker from a brewery in asheville i was just at the
asheville comedy festival and i got it for free. And this is the real cool thing.
When me and Doug went to Charlotte,
I met a guy who makes t-shirts and he
sends me free stuff, so I'm going to plug him.
It's called Ink Floyd and he sent me a shirt with
Richard Pryor with bloodshot eyes.
Cool.
Yeah.
He's high as fuck.
Oh, he's super high.
So that's all I've got.
Hopefully that guy
sends me more free shit.
Yeah, that was good.
That's a nice collection
of stuff that somebody's
going to win tonight.
Congratulations, somebody.
Oh, my drink.
Oh, thank you.
I think it's going to be
somebody who has lights
on their sign.
You think they're going to win?
It's a name tag, not a sign.
Okay, sorry.
To you.
But they're big.
You think you're going to pick that one?
Is that what you're saying?
I didn't know the name tags were going to be so big.
Right?
Yeah, but I love it because I have bad vision.
You thought they were going to have actual name tags
like on their chest,
like little ones?
And I was always
impressed with your guys'
ability to read them.
So this is a comedy podcast.
We got plenty of comedy coming.
But I want to talk to the...
I want to talk to the film critic here with us.
Chris, what's the last movie you saw that you could recommend?
Last movie I saw...
It's a rough time of year, right?
No, actually local art house theaters.
We're starting to get into art house stuff.
Yeah, showing the good stuff.
So I saw the documentary Best of Enemies.
Oh, that's terrific.
Yeah, the Gore Vidal, William F. Buckley documentary.
Great stuff.
Very interesting.
Also saw another movie
that's all conversations,
The End of the Tour.
I saw that a week ago.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, great movie.
See?
A couple people have seen it.
A few people have had a chance.
Very good movie.
The director of that film
was a guest on the show
a few weeks ago.
Which is pretty awesome
because I guess he's a good director.
He's good.
Yeah, Spectacular Now.
Spectacular Now, yes. Yeah. That was my whole review. And, uh... I guess he's a good director. He's good. Yeah, Spectacular Now. Spectacular Now, yes.
Yeah.
That was my whole review.
And, uh...
Didn't have that much time.
And he also did that one
about the drunks.
Uh, Smashed.
Yes.
Yeah, he's good.
And the end of the tour
might be the best one.
I really, really enjoyed
the hell out of it.
And, uh, yeah, very good.
All right, cool.
Cool.
Esther, have you been
to the movies lately?
I have been to the movies.
What'd you see?
Minions?
I love the Minions.
Minions have the cutest butts.
They do.
When they're naked, they really have interesting, yeah.
Around the screen.
Anatomy, yeah.
Yeah.
Weird.
I saw Batman, the original from 1989
That's not the original
Adam West is the original
Adam West is crying somewhere
But you mean the first time Michael Keaton played the part
Jack Nicholson was a joker
That's your favorite one?
Yeah
I like how Jack Nicholson laughs in it Sure was Joker. Yeah. That's your favorite one? Yeah. Okay.
I like how Jack Nicholson
laughs in it.
Sure.
You know,
he's like evil in it.
That Jack Nicholson
laugh.
Right.
Yeah.
Matt, you wanna do it?
You should check out
if you...
Have you seen
The Shining?
No.
You would love it.
You would love it. I've never seen The Shining
Oh yeah, he laughs it up good in that one
A lot of his characters like to laugh it up
He's a good laugher
Oh my god, I'm going to watch every Jack Nicholson movie from now on
Is that the only Jack Nicholson movie
You've ever seen?
You know he doesn't
Normally have all that
Makeup on
The Departed is fantastic
He doesn't usually
Play Prince on a boombox
He's not like Kiss
Matt what about you?
Have you been
Seeing anything lately?
My girlfriend planned a date for us on Monday
because we were both off of work,
and she took me out for a nice dinner,
and we went to drinks,
and then she was like,
what movie do you want to see on our date?
And I was like,
motherfucking straight out of Compton.
And it was amazing.
It was so good.
It was really fantastic.
The guy who plays Eazy-E,
I don't know his name,
something Mitchell,
he should be nominated for.
He did so great.
He was amazing.
I like that guy a lot.
Between the way the story was told and his performance,
Eazy-E was strangely the person in that group
I kind of knew the least about.
Yeah.
But there's so much more to know about him
than I certainly did.
So, yeah, and that guy's really likable.
He was so good.
And that's the thing,
is I always kind of just took Cube's side.
You know, I always just sort of thought...
I always wondered where you were coming from
on the NWA beef.
Now we can really get into this.
I just mean when they splintered,
I just sort of thought it was EZE's fault.
Somehow that came through in the press,
and it wasn't really his fault.
It was his, you know... You know, here's the thing I learned from movies... It was Paul Giamatti's fault. Somehow that came through in the press and it wasn't really his fault. It was his, you know.
You know, here's the thing I learned from movies
this year.
That's what I learned from movies this year.
If Paul Giamatti is managing your band,
shit's gonna be fucked up.
He's the last guy you want
around your band because he's
up to no good all the time.
And I haven't seen San Andreas
yet, but I bet you the earthquake was his fault.
We didn't even go...
Esther was kind of...
She was kind of interested in
the Twister attraction over at Universal.
But I was just like,
it is so old ass.
The Windy Room?
I do not know why that thing is still there.
There's a sign that said
10 minute wait. Who's even...
You know what?
They had a fast pass lane?
I gotta get in there quicker than...
You know what they did have,
though? They had that straight out of Compton
truck where guys just freestyle rap. They had a straight out of Compton truck where guys just freestyle rap.
They had a straight out of Compton food truck.
I was like, is it a ride where you do a drive-by?
That'd be awesome.
I would ride that.
Here's your taco.
Bang, bang.
So it's tacos.
Straight out of tacos.
Yeah, yeah.
It was a fun ride. I got AIDS on it, but it was great.
Matt, that's what it's called.
Leaving no room left on the table
for riffing on that particular...
Once you jump right to AIDS, it's over.
Spoiler alert.
I knew that
part of his story, but I didn't know it was
the kind of AIDS where you just kind of cough
every once in a while, then you're dead.
To explain you're dead.
Happened fast.
Yeah, it was quick.
But a lot happens
A lot happens in that movie
And it's
They're already
They're already planning
To do a sequel
Really?
Yeah they want to do more
Of the Suge and
Tupac stuff
The Death Row story
Snoop Dogg
Yeah all that stuff
Okay
Which is also
Very very interesting story
That Snoop Dogg went from
Like you know
Potential convicted murderer
To You know Singing with Katy Perry In the halftime show interesting story that Snoop Dogg went from potential convicted murderer to
singing with Katy Perry
at the halftime show.
It's the American dream.
In action. I don't know if he was on when she
was on the Super Bowl, but that sounded accurate.
Seemed ballpark-ish.
You can see him at a Super Bowl. Seemed like he could have it.
Yeah, he did do that song with her that one time.
And I think she sang that song at the Super Bowl.
More great stories.
It just never ends.
I'm trying to think of the last movie I saw,
and it was probably on my Netflix.
Oh, this wasn't the last one I saw,
but has anybody seen Creep?
That was good. That's a seen Creep? That was good.
That's a fucked up movie.
That was crazy.
That's really fucked up, that movie.
The ending is fantastic.
All the way through, it's fucked up.
It never stops being fucked up.
They're making it a trilogy.
Very accurately titled, Creep.
Yeah.
So I recommend you check that out if you...
Is that Bill Cosby's new special?
Don't if you...
Zing. Taking him down a parachute. I haven't seen it. I recommend you check that out if you... Is that Bill Cosby's new special? Don't if you... Sing!
Taking him down a parachute.
I haven't seen it.
I want you to come to my house in the woods.
And film me talking to my young child
because I'm dying of the tumor in the brain.
That was good.
All right,
so this is a good time
for me to say
let the games
begin.
Of course,
we got some
fantastic name tags
as discussed earlier in the show. Esther likes things that light up. Of course, we got some fantastic name tags,
as discussed earlier in the show.
Esther likes things that light up.
So don't forget to light up your signs and name tags.
Some people only have them on, like, paper.
Yeah, some people only use paper, that's right.
Some people have, like, card stock. Some use many different mediums.
You know?
Some people yell your name a lot.
Apparently.
How do you know my name, you creepy bastard?
Well, they decide who they're going to play for. We'll take a quick
commercial break. We'll be right back.
Once again, this episode
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Alright, we're back.
Great job, everybody.
People just throwing stuff on stage, man.
Someone just threw donuts at us.
Yeah.
I would pick the donuts, but I don't
feel like we can throw them in here
I don't think
Yeah
They're even
They're even like
White powdered donuts
Yeah that would make
A big mess
That would just make
A big mess
But thank you for the
The sentiment
He has
I see donuts over there
More donuts
Yeah one of these
Over here
These are
Crispy creams
Oh So many donuts
This is the part of the show where we get diabetes
Cookies and donuts
Got an Amy Adams Target out there
Oh they brought a Target
That's pretty fantastic
That's pretty fantastic.
That's good.
But speaking of Targets,
I see that guy had a healthy salad.
Not anymore.
Chris, do you want to try to hit the Amy Adams target?
You can just take one.
I can hold the box.
Just try to hit that target over there.
You want to frisbee it?
It went a little low.
Does someone else want to try?
Esther, give it a shot. All right, here I go.
Now I got glaze on the mic.
What?
Hit that, Amy Adams.
Oh, whoa, whoa.
All right.
Why is it I can throw farther than you, Chris?
I was going for finesse.
You were going for power. Oh.
Yeah.
Yeah. That sign is great, thank you
We know what this crowd likes
If there's another lull
Start throwing some more donuts around
We gotta see who you guys are playing for,
starting with Matt.
What's that name tag all about?
I'm playing for Jason,
and he made Jason 20, Jason Takes Orlando.
It's the Jason...
Oh, I thought the Jason mask,
I thought the eyes were cut out,
so you could hold it up to his face.
No.
Next time, maybe.
Maybe.
So your name's Jason?
I hope so.
The guy you got it from?
Are you like...
What?
What?
Oh, there's a four.
I just, whatever, man.
Jason takes Orlando.
Stop yelling at me.
I picked your fucking name tag.
I did kind of wonder what the comedic value was in part 20.
I mean, there's already been a dozen of them or something,
so 20's not that inconceivable.
But 420, now come on.
Well done.
Bravo.
Esther, who are you playing for?
Well, I walked by, and it was very tempting to pick a lot of signs.
Sorry, I can only pick one, but I picked Jen
and she has a name
tag like
Jem.
The 80s superstar.
Cartoon character. Yeah, yeah. There's a new
Jem movie coming out.
Who's playing her?
I think
they got Carol Channing.
I like in my head is like,
who's an old lady people might still know?
So that worked out pretty good.
All right, so Jen, but it looks like Jem,
and that's why you picked it.
Yeah, it's a nice...
Okay, great.
It's a nice name tag.
All right.
I'll throw a donut at anybody who disagrees.
What do you got, Chris?
I got a, it says here, Paul Soldiers.
Instead of Small Soldiers, Paul Soldiers. So I'm playing for Mr. Soldiers.
It's got a bunch of Cinema Crespo stickers on it.
Oh, so he's already a fan of you. Pick me, Cinema Crespo stickers on it, and it says... Oh, so he's already a fan of you.
Pick me, Cinema Crespo.
Yeah.
I had to jump on it.
Is he a friend of yours?
Is this collusion?
Oh, bullshit.
Shenanigans.
It says.
No one else did it.
Someone yelled deflating. I love how you went from collusion to shenanigans.
Is that the wrong order?
This is nepotism.
I'm just going to say words.
Bestiality.
Not that word.
Necrophilianism.
No matter how it makes him look to the public,
he gets to pick whoever he wants to play for.
Yeah, it's a bold move, you know.
First Amendment, yeah.
Sometimes friendship is more important than success.
I don't know what I'm saying.
All right, we're going to start with a little game
that I like to play.
I don't even know what that noise represented.
It's just kind of
random sounding.
We're going to play ABCD's
Nuts.
We'll start with you, Chris, and then
we'll go to Esther
and then to Matt.
It's just a spelling game.
That's why it's called ABCD's nuts.
We're going to spell
a word or two.
When it's your turn,
we'll get to the next letter in the word.
You name any movie,
any movie ever made
that begins with that letter,
you've succeeded.
Match the movie that I wrote down ahead of time
and you automatically win.
Can't think of...
Can't think of a movie that begins with that letter
and you're out.
And that's embarrassing.
This game is written by children.
Which is my nickname for myself When I get high and write this down
Come on children
It's time to write down that
ABCD's nuts game
Let's do it
Alright and we're going to spell,
since I think I'm going to go tomorrow,
and the Wizarding World of Harry Potter is too long,
we're just going to spell Disney World.
Yay, hooray for it.
It's right over there.
Maybe they can hear us.
I don't know about what Disney's going to be like tomorrow, but Harry Potter
was nicely, not just
Harry Potter, but the whole Universal thing
was nicely pretty empty
for a large portion of the day.
So I recommend it.
I recommend the water park.
She wanted to go to a water park.
No one sheared.
Fuck water.
Fuck the element of life.
We prefer going to earth and wind.
Parks.
All right.
The letter is D.
Chris, Crespo,
name any movie that begins with the letter D.
Dawn of the Dead.
That's a great one.
A couple movies.
The original, the Romero one.
A couple with that title.
Yeah, I like that one. They're both good. That's pretty good. I A couple movies. The original, the Romero one. A couple with that title. Yeah, I liked that one.
They're both good.
That was pretty good.
I went with Days of Thunder
because it was filmed partially in Central Florida.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
You guys will back me up on that.
All right, Esther,
any movie that begins with the letter I?
I. Okay, how the letter I? I.
Okay, how about
Inner Space?
Yeah.
I like that one.
That was the one VHS tape
we had in our house.
That and The Ten Commandments.
And Sound of Music.
Where are you from?
My life sucks.
North Korea.
I went with a movie called Instinct because it was
filmed partially right here in Orlando.
That's right. Anthony Hopkins
has been in Orlando, you guys.
That's pretty neat.
S is your letter, Matt.
Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants.
Mark it.
Are you sure it's not the Sisterhood of the...
No.
All right.
The audience seems pretty sure.
I'm with you.
I'm with you.
They are just a sisterhood.
They don't...
Why do they have...
Why do you have to say the?
What other four girls
are sharing a pair of pants?
For my S, I went with,
because it was shot in Florida,
a little motion picture called Spring Breakers.
Spring Breakers.
Yeah.
All right, we're back to Chris for N.
We need an N word from Chris.
Just shout. Whoa, whoa.
Shout an N word into your mic. Just shout. Shout an N.
First time on the show.
Just shout one out.
Shout out an N word.
I can't think of an N movie that was shot here, so I'll just
go ahead and say No Escape.
No Escape. Okay, sure.
That's an N. You're still in it.
I went with National
Treasure,
which of course
was probably not filmed here
although I think scenes from National Treasure 2
were filmed here
in a studio here
it's Disney exactly
I went with it for that very reason
because it's a Disney movie
E
E I went with somebody that they saw in the preview video reason because it's a Disney movie. E.
E. Okay. I went with somebody that they saw in the preview video
when they got here. Pauly Shore.
Encino Man.
Yeah.
You guys aren't coming back to see Pauly Shore?
No.
No. I like Encino Man
I like that movie
I went with Escape from Tomorrow
because it was filmed in Disney World
oh man
why Matt?
Yes, man.
Oh, okay.
It's not that nice.
Calm down.
Big Zooey Deschanel fan back there.
You know, Jim Carrey, your favorite was in that.
Your comedic hero.
Yeah.
Did you see that one?
No, but...
You're supposed to say yes, man.
Oh. Did you see that one? No, but... You're supposed to say yes, man. Oh, you went with yes, man.
I want to see Jim Carrey as a Joker.
What?
Yeah, in Batman.
He did do that.
He was the Riddler already.
He doesn't get to be two of them.
Why not?
He doesn't get to ruin two of them.
Wow.
I went with Yellow Submarine
for no reason.
It's just a good go-to when you need a Y movie.
W
as in
world. Chris?
World comma Wayne's.
Wayne's World.
Just not shot at Disney World.
Wayne's World.
Yeah.
I went with Wall E.
Disney.
Disney.
Yeah.
You see anywhere this is going?
Working on another level.
Esther, O.
O.
I picked...
What?
What's funny about O?
It's funny because if you just stop,
that would be a correct answer.
Okay, I'm saving my O for the other O.
In case there's another O coming.
Spell Disney World.
And then rethink your stance.
We're in South Florida.
I feel like Cuba has eaten South Florida,
so it might be Disney World-O.
You never know.
You never...
Those damn Cubans.
You never know.
You never know.
They're delicious sandwiches.
But you know a movie
that begins with O, right?
Oktoberfest.
I haven't seen it
I just saw it
while browsing through Netflix
it's called Beer Fest
someone just got stabbed
no he was just reminding us
what letter it was
oh
but there was that
version of Othello with, you know,
what's his name in it?
Josh Hartman.
Lawrence Fishburne.
Yeah, and it was just called O.
But I'll have to disqualify you for Oktoberfest.
What?
I don't know what that is.
It's a movie.
Call Leonard Maltin.
Hey, Leonard.
He's not answering.
I feel like you didn't use a real phone.
You just said call him.
You didn't get into the details of what methodology.
O is your letter Matt
Ong Bak
whoa
that's trippy
step up your kung fu movies
maybe you'd know what it is
oh
people want the full title
you're a dick
hold on hold on.
Is there more to it?
Is there more to it?
Yeah.
The American releases.
Full title is Ong Bak in its native country of Thailand.
Well, that's what I'm going with, the Thailand one.
Boom, suck it!
When they released it in America, they gave it a subtitle.
It's like the raid. It's like saying the first raid.
You can say the raid instead.
Yeah. I like this guy.
He's being logical.
Yeah, but was it the first raid?
Didn't it have a subtitle?
Only in America.
And what was it? Resurrection or something?
Redemption.
Extinction.
I don't know.
Oh, Ombak Thai Warrior.
They didn't need that in Thailand because they knew he was Thai.
Yeah, they would have called Thai Warrior in Thailand.
Over here they call it Ombak and his adventures on Earth.
I mean, I can come up with another O
if you don't want to count that one.
I'll count it.
That's fine.
Thanks.
Yeah.
I went with out of sight,
partially filmed in Florida.
Chris R.
Ratatouille Disney's Pixar's Ratatouille
That's a fun one
I went with another Disney motion picture called
Remember the Titans
That was going to be my answer for R
Damn it Esther
Damn you it's her fault
It's her fault you didn't get insanely lucky
L Liar liar another Jim Carrey fault. Cert fault you didn't get insanely lucky.
Liar, liar. Another Jim Carrey.
Liar, liar. Another Jim Carrey.
That's a fun approach.
I went with Lethal Weapon 3 because the opening scene is
the implosion of the old Orlando City
Hall.
Yay, explosions.
Such an area of pride for you.
And finally, Chris, D.
Donut of the Dead, the remake.
I like that.
I like that that worked out that way Nice bookends
I went with a movie called D-A-R-Y-L
Daryl
About a robot boy I think
Because of course
It was filmed in Orlando
And that's ABC These Nuts
We didn't really have a clear winner
On that one.
It's all good, though. We'll just move on to the next game, and we'll
penalize
Esther
by
which order did we go in last time?
We were going that way, so we'll go the other way.
We'll start with...
We'll start with Chris,
then we'll start with Matt,
then we'll go to Chris.
Just watching Matt's eyes dart around.
If his beard could point which way I should go,
it would.
It totally would.
All right, and I'd like to do a round of Last Man Stanton, if that's okay.
Holy shit.
People love this game.
That gentleman is excited.
People are excited to suggest a person that we're going to use.
But let me make sure all my guests...
Someone said Abe Vigoda.
Yeah.
I can name one Abe Vigoda movie.
I'm going to explain to my guests how this game works
before we get the name from the audience.
So settle down.
And...
Untense up.
We're gonna
get the name of an actor or an actress.
I'm gonna play along, because I think it's fun.
And so I'll go
second after Matt.
And we gotta take turns naming
movies that person's been in if you can't think of one
you're out. And it's not the last game
of the day, so don't put too much
weight on it.
It's just more fun
times at the Improv
in Orlando. Tip the waitstaff.
Oh, there was a young lady
that wrote in to me.
The guy that wrote in to me
just went, damn it.
When it's really small,
my avatar looks a little girly, but I don't think
I don't think he fell for it.
Now, where's Carly June at?
Oh, it's you right there in front.
And she's right up front, so this is really
this is perfect. This is a perfect
super fan moment
for Carly June
who wrote to me not once but at least twice.
Very stalkery, yes.
I've called the authorities.
But what's the name of
an actor or actress that you think we
have not played yet but would be
fun to do?
John C. Reilly.
John C. Reilly.
All right.
This is going to be short.
We can do it.
We could name a few. I think
if I were putting money on a winner,
I think I'd put money on
someone right now.
I'm googling
to see what he looks like.
Whoa, we got a cheater!
Cheater, cheater, pumpkin eater!
Well, at least you get to go forth, so you'll get an idea
of what he looks like by the time we get around to go forth, so you'll get an idea of what he looks like
by the time we get around to you.
Oh, that guy, okay.
Oh, you did get a good look at him?
That guy, he looks like he got in a car accident
and never fixed his face.
That was way worse than my AIDS joke.
Way worse.
That was a personal attack.
Maybe.
Maybe.
Or maybe
that's just what they picked
for his Wikipedia photo.
Maybe he was making a face.
Stop saying that you just looked him up
because that's like cheating.
I checked. She didn't cheat.
Oh, whoa.
I saw your phone.
Somebody is very against cheating over there.
She didn't cheat. It's on the level.
It's Kim Davis' vacationing in Florida.
But she does cheat.
The Bible says no cheating.
You say no cheating.
I say no cheating as well.
You're right.
All right. So no cheating. I say no cheating as well. You're right. All right.
So stop cheating.
And you'll know who he is by the time you hear three other movies that he's been in.
Maybe.
Because it's your fourth, so maybe you'll figure it out.
Matt?
Boogie Nights.
Yeah, there you go.
Lay on the gates.
That's a good one.
I might as well go obvious on it and say
Magnolia.
What's eating Gilbert Grape?
I'm going to play against a film critic.
So now you get it right, Esther.
You've seen... I've seen him
on posters. You know who he is.
That movie called
Stepbrother.
Oh. Whoa.
Full title. Full title.
What? Full title.
Stepbrothers.
Yeah.
Thank you, Donut Man. He looks like that sign Thank you Donut Man
He looks like that sign
Fucking Donut Man
He looks like that guy
From the giant donut sign
That's always nice to hear
Your face is the logo
You look like a human donut
You're talking about
Lord Lad
The Simpsons
Yeah Lord Lad
Sorry He's not a bad He's not bad Looking for a donut The Simpsons? Yeah, Lard Lad. Sorry.
He's not bad looking for a donut guy.
He's jolly.
He's smiling.
All right, so Matt?
Gangs of New York.
Oh, okay.
I will say...
Guardians of the Galaxy.
What happened?
Did he say one?
He said a big clue.
I didn't hear it.
A big clue.
I didn't hear it,
but please don't yell out audience.
Yeah, guys, come on.
Come on, guys.
Talladega Nights, the ballad of Ricky Ballard.
Oh, wow.
That's a...
Colon.
Top...
Is Will Ferrell here?
Will Ferrell!
That guy hates Will Ferrell.
Fucking angry about Will Ferrell.
Wow. Wow.
Okay.
You got another one, Esther?
I'm going for a wild guess here.
Oh, shit.
Strap in, everybody.
Talladega Nights,
the White Night of the...
something.
Wow.
Wow.
What?
I don't know.
Can you, like,
guesstimate to the closest movie?
You know when you Google something
and it says,
did you mean?
Can you turn that into, like,
a did you mean?
Help me out.
Well, he already said Talladega Nights.
You're presuming there's a sequel?
No.
Why not?
There's no sequel.
Sorry.
Stepbrothers 2.
Yeah, full title.
Still brothering. The return of the stepbrother.
The stepbrother returns with a vengeance.
Starring John C. Reilly.
Fuck.
You tried. It was a good try.
Matt.
Are you guys done?
No more fucking around. Let's go.
Shit.
Here we go.
You got it. John C. Reilly. The great John C. Reilly.
I think I'm out, man.
For reals?
People are so disappointed.
Are my parents here?
What the fuck is happening?
Don't worry, we've got a nice participation profi.
What?
A profi?
We've got a nice participation profi.
I'll say,
so you're out?
Can I make a guess?
Okay, sure.
Anchorman,
The Legend of Ron Burgundy?
I'm hearing some yes.
I don't think so.
Yeah, he is.
He's in the fight.
Yes.
Yes, he has his own news station.
Yeah, I'm still in it.
Champion, baby.
I stabbed the door.
He just,
whatever Will Ferrell movie
I can think of.
Some people are looking it up
and saying he's not in it.
He's probably in it.
He's only in this.
Oh.
You're out.
Anchorman 2.
Shit.
No, I'm not going to do that.
It's okay.
Is he in the other guys?
What?
Stop that.
Whoa, it's not even your turn.
You're out.
You're out.
You're out for now.
All right.
All right.
So it's still down to me and Chris.
So don't yell anything out yet, you guys.
I'm going to go with Chicago.
What else you got, Chris?
Hard Eight.
Yes, of course.
Hard fucking Eight.
That's right.
Fuck yeah.
I campaigned on his behalf
for an Academy Award nomination
for this film.
It's a little ditty that I enjoy called
Cedar Rapids.
I like that movie.
I'm running out though.
This is tough.
I know he's been...
Oh, I just thought of one.
Damn it.
That's very unnerving when you do that.
I'm trying to think of Will Ferrell comedy.
Was he in The Other Guys?
The Other Guys.
No.
I don't think he showed up in that.
One that just popped into my head was Never Been Kissed.
Yeah, yeah.
All right, but Chris is our winner of that game good job
and which ones Wreck-It Ralph. Wreck-It Ralph. Wreck-It Ralph. Voices. Tim and Eric. Tim and Eric.
Billion dollar movie.
Cyrus.
Cyrus.
Cyrus.
Days of Thunder.
He was in Days of Thunder?
The aforementioned Days of Thunder?
I forgot about that.
Yeah.
Oh, Wreck-It Ralph.
God damn.
It mostly sounds like a lot of wild screaming, guys.
It sounds like a riot from far away.
What's the name of the Tim and Eric movie?
Was he in that?
Billion dollar movie.
Thelma and Louise, really?
Tenacious D and the Pick of Destiny.
That was the one that broke everyone's heart.
Tenacious D and the Pick of Destiny.
Can't believe it.
Let's throw some donuts at some people.
Yeah, if you don't mind.
Hold that target back up.
You know what time it is.
Look at that one. That one's...
Oh, I want to hit the cans. The guy who has...
He hates cans.
Can I hit the cans with a donut?
Oh, Amy Adams.
Before I throw mine, I'm going to...
I think they hit someone in the face.
I'm sorry I hit someone. I hit someone in the face I'm sorry I hit someone in the face for sure
That sounded like
Donut hitting face
We should have people
sign releases
when they come in here
This is a
This is a tribute
to Ariana Grande
I'm gonna lick my donut
before I throw mine
Oh yeah
Alright
She bit it
She bit it?
That's gonna be up there forever
It didn't come down.
That's what Ariana Grande did.
She licked a donut, threw it into the lighting fixture.
New policy.
No more donuts.
Oh, that's going to eventually catch fire and really stink up the place.
Burnt donut.
Keep an eye on it.
We'll be fine.
Okay, you can put the Amy Adams Target down.
That's enough of that.
Yeah, right?
Craziness with the donuts.
I don't know how...
I don't want to take responsibility for that.
For that becoming a thing.
Saturday night in Boston,
we're in this huge theater,
the Wilbur Theater,
that has a couple different balconies.
And you know they're going to bring donuts.
And it's going to get crazy.
I'm bringing my donut slingshot.
What now?
The whole deal.
Somebody gave me a donut slingshot.
Bring the donut guy.
A mini donut slingshot. He's Bring the donut guy A mini donut slingshot
He's not the donut guy
Leave him alone
I'm just high
He's the donut guy to me
And there's donuts on stage
It makes sense
Did you see the
The beautiful
Douglas movies cookies
That somebody made
There's so many
Yeah I gotta get Like some more Is her name beautiful Douglas Movies cookies that somebody made. There's so many. I got your logo on them.
Yeah, I gotta get like some more.
Is her name on there or something?
Terry!
Okay, Terry.
Jesus, sounds like you lost a dog.
Laurel!
Laurel! Laurel!
Oh, poor Terry.
I hope she comes back.
The sign you put up is a really good likeness of her.
I think you got a good chance.
Yeah, nothing like lost dog humor.
Who doesn't have a hilarious lost dog story?
So let's move on To something some people hate even more
Let's play Reverse Malton
You guys know regular Leonard Maltin,
but this is a new twist on that called reverse Maltin.
And we're going to try it this way.
We're going to play three rounds.
First person to two points wins, so we might play four rounds.
I got this. I got this.
I got this.
Who won that last game? Did somebody win?
Chris. Oh yeah, Chris won.
Alright, so Chris will go first.
And then we'll... Very good honesty
panel.
Like all these people
sitting here wouldn't call him on it.
If he tried to do otherwise.
I'll say three
movies of Chris. He'll pick the one that
he thinks he knows the most names of actors
and actresses from the cast
of that film. Then I'll tell all
of you guys how many people
are in that movie. And then
starting with Chris,
just like we just did with Last Man
Stanton, you have to take turns
naming other people in the movie
that are listed by Leonard.
And if you miss, you're out.
And the last person standing with each title gets a point
and will play best two out of three points.
Hope that made sense.
Gotcha.
Here we go.
We're starting with Chris and going to
Matt
Change the order up again
You get to pick between
Which one of these do you think you know the most
Actors from?
Caddyshack, Happy Gilmore
Or the Legend of Bagger Vance
Arguably the three funniest golf movies
Let's go Happy Gilmore
Good old Haps Gilmore
From 1996
And Leonard lists
11 names
from the cast of Happy Gilmore.
So
we'll start off with Chris
and just see which ones
you can name. Just give us
one, any one.
Adam Sandler. Pretty clever.
Pretty clever way
to begin. Just get it off the table.
Yeah, just get that one out of there
because then we go to Matt. Just get it off the table. Yeah, just get that one out of there.
Because then we go to Matt.
She's right.
We don't go to me yet. This isn't a pub quiz.
We go to me?
I thought we were moving the order around again.
Carl Weathers.
Okay.
Yeah, right?
I'm not going to say whether you're right or wrong.
Keep it suspenseful
Esther
Robert Smigel
okay I'm gonna say if you're right or wrong
because I'm sorry that's wrong
what
good guess though
I'm sincere
he's been in some movies with him.
All right.
Back to Chris.
Ben Stiller?
People are confirming that he is indeed in the movie,
but he's not one of the 11 listed.
Oh!
So, Matt, you won that round.
Yay!
How is he not listed?
He was going to be who I said.
It's crazy, right?
Is Bob Barker on there?
What we really all want to know.
Bob Barker's definitely in there.
Julie Bowen from Modern Family.
Christopher McDonald
from the aforementioned Thelma and Louise.
Alan Covert,
Adam's buddy that's in all of his movies.
Is Richard Klein in there?
No, but Richard Keel, who played Jaws in the James Bond films, he got listed.
That's what I meant.
He got listed with Ben Sleuth. That's what you meant.
Kevin Nealon.
Yes.
Yeah.
And the director, Dennis Dugan.
Wow. Will Sassa was in it, too. Oh, fuck. All those Yes. Yeah. And the director, Dennis Dugan. Wow.
Will Sassa was in it, too.
Oh, fuck.
Dennis Dugan.
All those people.
Yeah.
Good job.
Matt's on the board with one point, everybody.
Still trying to figure out the best way to play that game,
but I think that way is pretty fun.
I enjoyed that. Let's fun. I enjoyed that.
Let's do another round of it.
This time we'll let...
Oh, we won't let.
The person who won the round gets to go first.
That's how it works, but then we switch the order around.
So Matt, we'll go Matt, then Esther.
And Matt gets to pick between
three films.
And which one of these would you like to do? Would you like Pretty Woman, Nodding Hill, or Erin Brockovich?
Nodding Hill!
I don't want any of them.
Which one do you want to curl up with tonight?
A nice beard.
I guess I'll go Pretty Woman.
Pretty Woman.
Everybody knows that there were people in Pretty Woman.
Leonard lists, or he, the year is 1990.
I guess we all knew that, too.
But he lists six, seven, eight, nine, ten names.
Ten names.
How many?
You don't have to say how many.
You just have to start naming them.
Do I start?
Yeah, and then we go to Esther.
Julia Roberts.
Yeah, you snake in the grass.
Who else besides Julia Roberts was in Pretty Woman, Esther?
Jason Alexander.
Good pull, good pull.
Jerry, your girlfriend's a whore!
And she doesn't take Travelers checks
Who else is in that Chris?
Richard Gere
Interesting
Interesting
Matt I've never seen any of those movies Interesting.
Matt?
I've never seen any of those movies.
I assume she had some type of whore friend.
She was a whore.
Who was... Kim Cattrall, I'm just guessing.
I've never seen...
She was big in the 90s.
What?
She was in Big and 90s. Why?
She was in Big and Big Trouble in Little China. She was in a lot of big
movies. Started with Big.
Alright, you're out.
Alright.
Esther?
Can I get a landline
from the audience? You know that cute girl?
Look him up on Wikipedia.
You know that cute girl who's in Just Shoot Me?
She played her friend.
Allison what?
He didn't say the right name anyway.
She was great in it.
What?
What was her name?
You can't do it that way.
You can't turn to the audience and ask for help.
Why not?
They're here.
They brought us donuts.
Might as well put them to work.
And we brought them a present.
A bunch of slackers just sitting there watching.
Having their drinks.
Let's just do this in the green room.
But that's your guest?
Is that lady that was on that other thing?
Allison Zorun.
No, yeah, that's no good.
You're out.
Can you come up?
You got another one, Chris?
Was Roy Orbison in it?
The cameo?
He should have gotten a cameo.
Singing the song
in the background, right?
Yeah.
Pretty woman.
Yeah, he sang the song,
but...
During the end credits,
he pops up on Julia Roberts.
No, he doesn't pop up.
He bought 10 houses with it.
Damn it, Leonard.
Yeah, but that means
Chris is on the board.
He's got a point, right?
Because I was the last one to get one, right?
Oh, man.
Right, weren't you?
If you said Richard Gere, I would have been so fucked, too.
Yeah, but you were on the right track, Esther.
You weren't wrong.
Laura San Giacomo.
That's what I said.
So many words, yes.
And you know, it was directed by Gary Marshall, so you
got it. Hector Elizondo's always
in the mix. Who wrote On the Way to the Funny.
What's that?
Gary Marshall wrote this book, On the Way to
the Funny. Yeah? Yeah.
Is it a good book? He talked about making
Pretty Woman. Doug loves books.
Doug loves books about movies.
Yeah, and then
a bunch of other, the great comedian
Larry Miller was in it. He's the guy in the
dress shop.
But anyway,
we've got two people with points on the
board. Esther's the only one that needs to
get in the game.
That's going to come right back at her. Come on,
Esther! Yeah! Esther the molester.
I've never had a
more divided
feeling about the audience. Like, some
people really want you to win,
Esther. And some
people very much do not want you to win.
Yeah, yeah. It's interesting.
You have instant super fans.
I have a polarizing effect.
I love it.
All right, so we're going to start with Chris,
and then it's coming to you, Esther.
Chris gets to pick between...
Which one of these do you think you know more actors from?
Kill Bill Vol. 2,
Inglourious Bastards,
or Django Unchained?
Oh, ooh!
Shit got
Fourth of July up in this bitch!
Let's go with
Inglourious Bastards.
Alright.
Alright.
Let's go with Inglourious Bastards.
Alright.
And
2009 is the year
and Leonard lists
13
13
names
from the cast.
And I'll just
give a hint for everybody
just throw it out right away.
Bob Barker is not one of them.
Or Ben Stiller. Okay, here we go.
Brad Pitt.
Alright, he's opening with Brad Pitt.
Star of Inglorious Bastards.
Oh, God.
What do you got, Esther?
Um, Uma Thurman.
Nailed it.
Correct. Matt?
Yes.
She played Adolf.
Adolf.
She played Adolf.
Christoph Waltz.
Give her bonus points for pronunciation.
Christoph Waltz?
Was in that motion picture?
Alright, back to you, Chris.
Diane Kruger.
Oh, nice.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, thank you.
Esther.
Wait, she's still in?
Yeah, she is.
Fuck, I don't want to be in.
Oh, you don't have another one?
That first guess was so great,
I thought you'd...
I thought you'd guess your way to the top.
Just think, you know, Tarantino movies.
It's always a good chance.
John Travolta.
Correct, that's correct.
Shut up.
That's correct.
Matt?
Michael Fassbender.
Chris?
Eli Roth?
Yes.
The Bear Jew.
Then we go to Esther.
Wild guess here.
Philip Roth. Wait.
The writer?
Wasn't he in something?
Tim Roth.
Let me double check.
No, I'm sorry.
Schindler's List.
Philip Roth isn't in it.
He was in something.
All right.
So now you're out.
Oh, it wasn't a big part.
Mike Myers.
Yeah.
I'm hoping he's listed.
He is listed.
Yes.
BJ Novak.
Yeah. that's right
his name is BJ
easy life
easy
oh man
this has been
pretty exciting
let me give a quick recap
can I name the director?
I don't know if you can
but it wouldn't help you here
so for Brad Pitt Can I name the director? I don't know if you can, but it wouldn't help you here.
So Forgot Brad Pitt,
Christoph Vogts,
Eli Roth, Michael Fassbender,
Diane Kruger,
BJ Novak,
Mike Myers.
Who else?
Seth Myers? Was he one of the Jews? Wait, that... Seth Meyers?
Was he one of the Jews?
Wait, that sounded bad.
That sounded way worse than I wanted it to sound like.
Wait.
Wait.
Come on, wait, you guys, wait.
He's going to make it not sound bad.
Was he one of those pleasant Jewish people?
He meant one of them Jews.
Did you really think there was a chance he was in it? Yes. Okay.
It really was an interesting production.
He tried to get everyone named Myers in show
business
to come by and play cameos, dramatic roles.
But no, sorry, no Seth Meyers.
That means that Chris lasted the longest
and also got another point, so that's two points.
Chris is our winner for the night.
What was the blonde's name?
Sam Levine!
The woman, not the man, you freaks.
Same difference!
Sam Levine.
Everybody's yelling, I'm holding it right in my hand.
The good guy, the good chick who got shot in the leg.
Melanie Laurent.
No, no, the American. The American woman who got shot. Diane Kr. Melanie Laurent. Laurent. No, no. The American.
The American woman who got...
Diane Kruger.
Oh, was it?
Okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The one who got choked out by Christoph Waltz.
And Daniel Bruhl was in there.
And Till Schweiger.
And...
Samuel Jackson listed.
Julie Dreyfuss.
Julie Dreyfuss.
Really?
Who's that?
And Rod Taylor.
Yeah.
Oh, Rod.
Oh, Rod.
Spare the rod and spoil no one.
All right.
Well, that was great.
You guys want to do one more just for fun?
Sure.
We'll just do it just for fun, then.
And we'll let you pick first, Esther.
Ready?
Thanks.
I feel like this is a pity pick.
Go.
That was pretty condescending.
I mean, you have to pick first, Esther.
I'm forcing you to.
From these three films.
Sleepless in Seattle,
Say Anything,
or Singles.
Ooh.
Can I roll the dice again?
Three films that take place in Seattle.
Or.
Or.
Ooh.
So yeah, so Citizen Dick is the name of the band in the movie Singles.
Interesting thing to yell out.
Citizen Dick.
Which, uh... Citizen Dick. Which
pick a movie that
any of the movies that we've played in the game
at all tonight, not the ones we've played already,
but the ones we haven't picked. Was there another
one earlier that you wished we'd pick?
Something with Jim Carrey.
Was there any
with Jim Carrey in it? I don't think so.
Kill Bill!
I didn't say any. Is there any with Jim Carrey in it? I don't think so I didn't say any Is there any movie
With Jim Carrey in it
That we've played so far tonight
Yeah there was something earlier
Was there something earlier like
Notting Hill or
Stop suggesting things
Don't make fun of my gift bag
Caddyshack Alright Caddyshack Roddinghill or... Stop suggesting things. Don't make fun of my gift bag.
Caddyshack?
All right, Caddyshack.
All right.
This will be fun.
All right.
All right.
We'll go to Matt second.
So, Esther?
I play this comedy club in New York City.
Rodney Dangerfield.
There you go.
Rodney Dangerfield.
Nice.
Who I really, every time I see Trump, I think that it's just that character from Caddyshack
is running
for president.
Because in the movie, he's rich. He's always like, everyone
shouldn't be so politically correct.
He's always saying really
horrible things.
It really matches up.
As soon as Trump shows up
at an event, they play,
Anyway you want it,
I'm going to be like,
he just stole his whole thing from Caddyshack.
If his running mate is a fucking gopher, you guys,
we're going to know what's up.
Okay, Matt.
Chevy Chase.
Of course.
Chris. Bill Murray. Back Chase. Of course. Chris.
Bill Murray.
Back to you, Esther.
Fuck.
If you brought a name tag with somebody who's in the movie,
please hold it up.
Oh, that would help you if that would happen to be true.
Quit trying to figure out ways to cheat.
It's tough to come up with another name
out of this bunch.
I guess I'll just have to guess.
Norm MacDonald?
Norm MacDonald?
Why are you yelling out names?
Who's next?
Yeah.
No.
Is Kevin Bacon in it?
No.
I'm hanging the foot loose again.
I was going to say Ted Knight,
but then that dude yelled and took my answer.
I know.
He's no fun.
After Ted Knight,
there's that girl with the bad Irish accent
and the dude.
Oh, Brian Doyle Murray.
Yes!
Just had to go through it.
Sweet.
Yeah, yeah.
Cindy Morgan was the hot blonde chick.
Lacey Underalls.
And Scott Columby
was the
kid in the red shirt that looked like Chachi.
The tough guy. Tough guy.
Tough Chachi guy.
Michael O'Keefe was
Noonan.
And...
Be the ball.
Oh, boy,
was Chevy Chase funny in that?
What happened
Alright so
Let's go through and
Pass me your name tags for the
The shitheads
For the end here
And what do you got to plug
Matt Fernandez everybody
What do you got to plug dude
Let's hear it for him
Fernandez everybody.
What do you got to plug dude?
Let's hear it for him.
I wrote them down because I knew I'd forget.
Saturday September 19th
I'll be at the Laughing Derby
in Louisville doing three shows.
September 24th through the 27th
I'll be at Sidesplitters in Tampa
with April Macy.
October 3rd I'm doing the side stage
on the Oddball Comedy Festival in Tampa.
You can see all my dates at
mattfernandezworld.com. And you can follow me
at Fat Fernandez.
On Twitter.
Not like in life.
Side stage
at Oddball's, he just finds a box
and stands on it. Yeah, it's just me.
Just finds a garbage
container or something.
And Chris Crespo, what do you got?
Obviously your podcast.
Cinema Crespo Adiso.
Please check it out.
You can check it out at chriscrespo.com, iTunes, Stitcher.
Follow me on Twitter at IamChrisCrespo.
And can everyone do me a favor?
Please help save my friend's life and go to kidneyforkevin.com.
Whoa, really?
KidneyForKevin.com
KidneyForKevin.com
Just check it out. Read the
story. If you can even donate a dollar, that would be
amazing. Yeah, go there first before you go
to DraftKings.com.
Spend those dollars wisely.
There's no rush. DraftKings isn't
going anywhere, but they do have
two million dollars for someone to win.
They got Ed Norton
doing their voiceover in their commercials, man.
They're fine.
Oh, that's who's doing that?
Yeah.
Don't talk so fast.
But good job, man.
Thanks for being here.
Where's the person you were playing for?
Paul.
Where you at, Paul?
Paul's over there somewhere.
You got to come start getting this stuff.
All of this is yours.
Wait, what about my plugs?
I'm going to do it.
What are you, crazy?
Good luck following the kid who needs a kidney.
I decided to get the prizes.
Make sure they get given out
That big bag you brought, Esther
Everything fit in there, great job
Nice job
Congratulations, what was his name again?
Paul
Paul Soldiers
Did you give him his name tag back?
Oh, no, does he want his name tag back?
Do you want it back?
Paul Soldiers, everybody.
One more time for Paul Soldiers.
Esther Kuh, what do you got coming up?
How do they know to make their name tag so big?
I would bring a small one.
Well, now you know.
There's an Asian joke in there somewhere,
but I'm going to step right over it.
I'm going to ignore it because it's low hanging fruit
and I'm not that guy
be that guy
yeah there totally
is an Asian joke in there
Asians always go
for those kinds of jokes
I was literally asking
but I'm being Miami
September 12th
I'm performing
at a hair salon
in Wynwood
it's called Junior and Hedder a hair salon in Wynwood.
It's called Junior and Header.
September 17th, I'm at Joker's Wild
in New Haven, Connecticut.
On September 19th,
I'm at University of Massachusetts
Amherst.
Really?
You give out college dates?
Like, what do you want?
Just people listening to this
just crash that college?
Yeah.
Go check you out.
Be the creepy adult.
And then
you can find my podcast
Coup and the Gang.
Coup and the Gang.
Brand new podcast.
On iTunes.
Check it out.
I'm going to be on it soon,
I think.
I'm doing two shows
in Tampa
on October 29th
and 31st.
31st, of course,
being Halloween.
So we're going to do
a Doug Lo Douglas Movies
at 420 on Halloween in Tampa.
So come on out to that, you guys, if you can.
Orlando, what a great crowd.
Am I right?
So good, man.
One more time for
Matt Fernandez,
Esther Koo, and Chris Crespo.
Now, I don't know who this second one is,
but I think it's going to be someone that's going to rile everybody up,
so I'm going to say it second
and hope that that is the successful formula.
As always, no FX is a successful formula. As always,
no FX is a shithead.
I mean, I know they're a band.
Didn't know they were
a shithead till now.
Now it's fact.
Do you
recognize that name?
This might just be a personal grudge. I bet that's fact. And do you recognize that name? This might just be a personal grudge.
I bet that's it.
Where is Jason?
Where are you at?
Yeah.
Is this a personal thing?
Yeah, he's not here tonight.
He's not even here tonight.
All right.
I thought it might be like a local politician
and everyone would go, boom!
And I'd be like, yay!
Like a Rick Scott guy?
Yeah.
Yeah.
All right. I know how to fix this.
I know how to fix this.
Greg Scraper and Rick Scott are a shithead.
One more time, today's episode was brought to you in part by DraftKings.com. One week fantasy football at DraftKings means every moment could take you closer to a life-changing payday.
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Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie.
Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky.
There's no room in his heart for you Cause Doug loves movies