Doug Loves Movies - Frank Castillo, David Sanborn and Dan Van Kirk guest
Episode Date: November 8, 2021Live from the American Comedy Company in Sweet Home San Diego, Doug welcomes Frank Castillo, David Sanborn and Dan Van Kirk to the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on... Stitcher Premium. For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Doug hates candy wrappers, squeaky babies, sticky seats
With 50 acid popcorn kernels in his teeth
There's still not one that he won't see
Cause Doug loves movies Hey, hey, hey, everybody.
My name is Doug, and I love movies.
This is Doug Loves Movies.
That wasn't bad.
Let's do it again.
My name is Doug Doug and I love movies
This is Doug Loves Movies
You sound angry about it
This is Doug Loves Movies
I'm high and I'm in a basement
I am high and in a basement
I don't know about everybody else
Let me get the script out of this big, beautiful bag
that I'm giving away today.
It was sent to me by the...
Is this the correct side?
Can you see when it's...
Oh, it's got to flip it around.
But it's...
You know that sensational, I haven't watched it, TV show on...
I think it's on HBO Max called Foundation?
Or is it just on regular HBO? Anyway, whatever it's on HBO Max called Foundation. Or is it just on regular HBO?
Anyway, whatever it's on,
Foundation sent me this beautiful, beautiful bag.
It's probably more valuable and better
than pretty much everything else that's in the bag.
But I will show it all to you in a little bit
during the first commercial break.
It's going to make a loud sound.
That wasn't too bad.
Here we go.
We're coming to you once again
from the American
Comedy Company
in Sweet Home San Diego!
Cuckoo!
Cuckoo!
Cuckoo! Cuckoo! Cuckoo!
Oh boy.
He's so excited.
Eddie, calm down. Let me introduce you
to everybody.
I'm excited to be back
and get to sit here
in front of my illuminated
friend.
American Comedy Company's mascot,
Edward T. Eagle.
Caw-caw!
That catchphrase has really caught on, Eddie.
I gotta tell you, man, it's really, people love it.
They love to caw-caw at me on the street
from time to time, and that gets confusing.
That warms my feathers.
What's that? That warms my feathers.
Okay, I guess that's better than
warming your cockles. I've never
understood that expression.
Oh no, now that's what you should say next time.
If there ever is a next time.
That warms my cock-a-calls.
Cock-a-calls.
Oh, that's good.
We got to hashtag that.
That's really going to catch on.
But how have you been, Eddie?
I've been good, Doug.
How about you?
Oh, you know, just getting back out on the road,
doing Doug Loves Movies for audiences.
We did one here, oh gosh, in September, I think it was.
I know.
And you were one of the only people that got to hear it, unfortunately.
We had sound troubles, but we're not having sound troubles today.
No, I gave a good talking to everybody.
I was just going to say, I assume, because I find
out later if there were sound troubles.
We're good. We're good. But if you're listening
to this,
it worked.
If you're not listening to this, you're not
listening to this.
And you all that came here today
get to see a,
you know, experience something
that no one else will.
So fingers crossed.
And close.
You really do make it all about yourself, don't you, Eddie?
I'm just excited to be back talking to you.
Yeah, do the other comedians like it
when you talk during the show?
No, sometimes they lean on me.
And then other times they ignore I'm here
and I'm like,
look at me!
Yeah, you have a real
look at me pose going on.
I know!
It's just good to be back.
I got a job as a part-time falconer
during the pandemic.
You would catch and raise falcons?
No, I would kill falcons
while they were doing shows
for other people. That's not what a falconer does, I would kill falcons while they were doing shows for other people.
That's not what a falconer
does, I don't think.
That's how I do it.
Okay, you put a nice new twist
on falconry. Yep.
Do you mind if I do some plugs?
Some Doug plugs? Plug away,
brother. Why am I looking over there?
I'm doing stand-up in St. Louis next Friday at, you'll love this name, Eddie, the Flyover Comedy Festival.
Caw-caw!
Yeah, wouldn't you love to fly over?
Yeah, that sounds great for you.
And then next Saturday, I'm doing stand-up at Warehouse Live in Houston, Texas.
Good God.
At 420.
12 Guests of Christmas returns to the Gramercy Theater in New York. Never been on it.
Okay, well, Eddie.
12 seats, not one for Eddie.
Eddie, you're here in California.
I don't know how to get you to New York.
I'll be there.
You're bolted to the stage.
Well, somebody could bring me.
I once dated a girl from the steakhouse across the street.
Her name was Cindy, and she was a bus girl,
and she got fired for doing blow with two of the waiters in the front entryway.
But back then, she would have taken me anywhere.
I could call her.
Is her front entryway a euphemism?
Oh, cuckoo!
Hey! What was I talking about? Oh, cuckoo!
Hey!
What was I talking about?
Oh, 12 guests at Christmas.
Yeah, okay, if you can make it out to New York, Eddie.
All right, I'll let you know.
You can be on there.
I never talk to you except for when I'm sitting here on stage,
but okay, we'll figure it out, I guess.
It's like trying to get Bill Murray to come do something he just shows up
somehow at weddings
with very little conversation about it
12 Guests at Christmas
New York City
November 28th
all of my dates and deets and links can be found
at DougLovesMovies.com
DougLovesMovies.com
DougLovesMovies.com
DougLovesMovies.com
DougLovesMvies.com. That's Douglovesmovies.com. Yeah!
Caw-caw!
I'm falling.
Is that an answer?
Caw-caw.
We're not adding another caw-caw to the end of that.
But that was very well done.
I'm especially surprised considering how
this is Douglas' movie seemed to throw you a little bit.
But the real intricate one, everybody knows perfectly.
Just the next person that you see
that doesn't listen to this show,
just say that whole thing to them.
And then say, don't worry about it.
It's just between me and some other very special people.
It's like we have our own language.
Sounds like someone's on fire.
I thought somebody ordered fajitas.
I think you're right, Eddie.
I think that's what happened.
It's a goddamn Chili's 2 operating back there.
It's just the kitchen.
They have delicious food here.
They do, they do.
I've been enjoying the pretzel nugget bites.
And feel free, Eddie, by the way,
and clearly you already are,
to chime in at any point during the show today.
I'm going to win.
No, you're not going to actually be one of the contestants.
Well, then I've already won.
I just meant that if you had something to say about what was going on.
Click on, click on.
Exactly.
Something like that would be perfect.
Perfect little pick me up if there's a lull.
I've got two great guests today,
but what we need to do now is pick a third guest
from the staff of this club or the audience.
The club!
I didn't tell the staff that they could be a guest,
so I probably shouldn't say that,
but that would be hilarious
if we just
brought somebody who's trying to
serve people, and then
they don't get their shit for the entire show.
Sorry.
I could see if Cindy's available.
What?
Cindy, the girl who got fired for doing blow
with two waiters in the entryway of the
steak restaurant across the street. guarantee she's free uh no that's all right that's cool because i i'd like it to be
you know someone who listens to the shows familiar with the games paid to come see it today which i appreciate so uh let's see if there's uh
even enough people out there to warrant a search or a contest of some kind so first of all who
bought name tags we had any i see some posters out there oh yeah we got some good ones whoa
what's that what's that doll doing back there?
It's like I love what?
Oh, it's Donna of the Dead?
And your name is Don?
Okay People named Donald are pissed about it
Cannibal, I love that, Holocaust People named Donald are pissed about it. Cannabill.
I love that.
Holocaust.
House of Carl's.
That's a TV show, first of all.
Carl.
Second of all.
Good job.
Independence David.
Gerabry Park.
Very nice.
Nicole's.
She took the poster for holes.
Made that work.
You keep digging.
Okay, now continue to hold up your name tag
if you would like me to invite you up on stage
to participate in the show today.
Yeah, you'd have to play all the games.
See, that really narrowed it down.
Yeah, usually you guys are pretty confident from your seats.
No, they know what's going to happen if they get up here.
They're going to have to deal with this stupid eagle
talking at them the whole show.
How dare you?
No, no, one of the other guests is a stupid eagle.
You're an awesome eagle.
Caw, caw, caw, caw.
All right.
So did that guy rescind or are you still in?
Do you want to be a guest?
Yeah, why not?
Okay.
Keep holding your thing up.
I'm so demanding.
No, you can put it down.
Put it back up. Put it up. Put it up. Yeah, put it down. Put it back up.
Put it up.
Put it up.
Yeah, put it up.
Put it up.
What's your name?
Anthony.
Anthony.
Okay, it's going to be Anthony versus David versus Nicole
to determine which one of you gets to be up here on stage
with my other guests.
Let's go to Donna in the back.
Donna the dead
Could you tell me
Your favorite actor
What's the name of your favorite actor
Say Ray Liotta
God damn it
You do not listen to him God damn it?
You do not listen to him.
You could say whatever name you want to say.
H. John Benjamin.
H. John Benjamin.
Did I say you could say any name you wanted to say? This is what you get when you don't say Ray Liotta.
We do love Bob's Burgers very much here at Doug Loves Movies.
We do love Bob's Burgers very much here at Doug Loves Movies.
And we also love his R&B commercials because you know why, Eddie?
Why?
They have the meats.
Oh, that was great.
Yeah, that wasn't even him.
I think that's Ving Rhames that says that part.
I think H. John, I think they kicked him to the curb.
And for a while he'd stand there and go,
look at all these meats.
All right, so anyway, try again, Donna.
Like a movie star.
Clint Eastwood.
Clint Eastwood, boom.
Good call.
Nailed it.
Nailed it.
All right, so I forgot the first guy's name already.
Anthony. Anthony. Okay. Anthony. Okay. Anthony. And he makes me giggle. Anthony and David and then Nicole will go in that order. And we'll start with Anthony. And whoever can name the most Clint Eastwood movies. I'll even allow ones he directed and ones that you tricked me into thinking
that he had something to do with
because it's going to be a speed game.
We're not going to take a lot of time with it.
Anthony's looking at me like he's already fucked.
Come on, Anthony.
Come on, you can do it.
Eddie has faith in you.
Start us off.
Clint Eastwood movie, Anthony only, Anthony. Come on, you can do it. Eddie has faith in you. Start us off. Clint Eastwood movie, Anthony only, please.
Cry Macho.
Cry Macho.
Not everyone you know.
You only have to name one, and you're still in it.
I hope David didn't hear that next one that you said, but I heard it, so I bet you David did.
David, do you want to take that one, or would you like to choose one of your own?
I'll take that one.
He's going to take that one.
All right.
So also I have to repeat what you're saying so the listeners can hear.
So what was the first one you said?
Cry Macho.
No, before that?
Cry Macho.
Yeah.
Okay.
You said Gran Torino and Cry Macho and then David took one of those.
And then Nicole, your turn.
American Sniper.
American Sniper.
He directed that. Anthony? Good, Bad, and the Ugly. Good, the Bad, and, your turn. American Sniper. American Sniper. He directed that.
Anthony?
Good, Bad, and the Ugly.
Good, Bad, and the Ugly.
Spaghetti Western.
David?
The Mule.
The Mule.
Sequel to Gran Torino.
New Day, same old asshole.
Nicole?
Million Dollar Baby.
Million Dollar Baby.
Academy Award winning film Anthony
In the Line of Fire
with Johnny Malkovich
David
Sully
Land That Plane
Nicole
Nicole's out
No I'm out
It's technically a movie
Okay Nicole's still in
according to Eddie
Anthony
Yeah it's tough right This is good training Okay, Nicole's still in, according to Eddie. Anthony.
Yeah, it's tough, right?
This is good training for what's going to happen when you get up here.
You out?
He's out.
David?
Yeah, you got to say another one.
You can't just coast into the wind.
We can't have a tie because then you guys will have to arm wrestle
or some shit.
Fistful of dollars, yes.
That's correct.
And then for a few dollars more.
Which is hilarious.
All the doll hair movies.
Alright, so congratulations, David David you lasted the longest I didn't want to say it I was really hoping Nicole would be our winner but you know
you won fair and square David so uh when I announce everybody what's your last name David
Sanborn what's your last name, David? Sanborn? What's your social security number, David?
We're waiting.
Check this out.
I got a light-up pen.
Oh, the ants.
Yeah, I'm ready for this.
I know what the assignment is.
All right, Sanborn, David is who I'm about to introduce.
So just hop up here, David.
Just walk around this thing over here.
Come through this way and, you know, take whatever seat you want.
Along with my other guests.
Is everybody ready?
Go, go!
Oh, shit.
Eddie's ready.
Ready Eddie.
Ready Eddie is here.
So let's
give it up everybody
for
Frank Castillo, David
Sanborn and Dan Van
Kerr.
Oh look Oh, look at them, all those fellas.
Let's meet them individually and alphabetically.
This worked out beautifully.
Starting with, we just both discovered after knowing each other and doing shows with each other
that this is his first
time on Doug Lowe's movies.
We both thought he might have done it in the
past, but we were both wrong.
It's Frank Castillo, everybody.
Hey!
Hey!
Stoked to be here.
It's great to have you. Thanks for
driving down from Los Angeles.
And good luck getting back.
Right?
Because you're going to have some fun while you're here.
Yeah, I think I'm going to hang out and catch the late shows
and then probably get a nice burrito somewhere in San Diego.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
You can do that here for sure.
Oh, absolutely.
I came mostly for the burritos.
And to smoke weed with you, but definitely the burritos.
Hey, there you go.
Now we're talking.
I was like, is he holding out on me?
Does he not have anything for me?
No, but he's good.
And you don't have, like, a beverage or anything with you?
No, no, no. It's a long-ass show, dude. You sure you don't have like a beverage or anything with you? No,
no,
no.
It's a long ass show,
dude.
You sure you're not going to want something to drink at some point?
I put a little stool out for you to put your drink on if you want to.
All right,
you're right.
You want to go grab one?
Yeah,
I'll grab a Cobra.
Cause I,
I can tell I'm going to get cotton mouth in like 30 minutes.
Yeah.
Grab your drink.
Also,
there's something I want to tell everybody about you that I don't want you to
hear.
That's not true.
I just wanted to talk to our next guest while Frank gets
a beverage. Also, did you bring your drink
up with you? I did.
Oh, perfect. There's a little thing next to you
on your left there where you can put your drink.
Yeah. I'm a courteous
host. Indeed, yeah.
Yeah, and that's David Sanborn,
everybody!
David!
Yeah, David!
Another first-time guest on the show.
Must be eating Eddie alive to have all these first-timers just trot it out right there.
They better prove it!
Right there in front of Eddie.
Yeah, Eddie's going to be mad if you guys aren't good at this.
But how long have you been listening to the show, David?
Or do you listen, I guess I should ask.
I do listen.
It's at least four years.
Okay.
I think.
Yeah.
Somewhere around there.
That's nice.
That's a good amount of the,
that's a good chunk out of the 15.
Wow.
15 years.
Has it been 15 years?
Yeah, can you believe that shit?
Yeah.
I can't. I just mean it's impressive and awesome. Oh, thanks.
I can't believe you've been crushing it
for 15 years. Crushing it.
Yes. Yeah, and
we got two first timers. We'll see what
happens with them. What do you do for a living, David
Sanborn?
Well, I guess
a trophy husband? Let's go with that.
Fuck yeah, dude!
Oh, fucking yeah! That's great!
Say this shit with your chest, dog.
Get yourself a fucking empowered woman, motherfucker!
I mean, she got third place, but
like, you know, it's a trophy.
Is she, uh...
That's her, right? Sitting right there?
Well, yeah, that's her. Okay, I was yeah that's her okay I was just
going to make sure
that before I said
anything but
I mean you know
you're a very
lucky trophy
husband I'd say
incredibly
yeah yeah
I was expecting
to look over there
and just be you know
keep my mouth shut
no
yeah he's right
he's the best
of those two
he definitely he definitely wins that competition.
Can I say this to you? You're his wife. Can I say this on behalf of his parents?
Thanks for taking care of him. Thank you. We didn't know for a long time. We're like,
who knows what's going to happen? And then you, you solved everything. Thank you.
It's great because it's like behind every like happy man
is a more successful woman that steps on his Lego collection.
And just goes, babe, again?
Oh, man.
What do you say that he does for a living if anybody asks?
Perfect.
Whatever I tell him to.
Whoa. Let me just repeat
that for the listeners. Whatever she
tells him to.
That is a good trophy husband.
But maybe
not trophy, but maybe like
I don't know.
Like a knick-knack.
Sure.
Participation medal.
A knick-knack husband? Hilaration medal? A knick-knack husband?
Hilarious.
I'm a tchotchke husband.
Whatever you would find in a TGI Fridays,
that's the level of husband I am.
I'm an appetizer husband.
Sure.
She's just gearing up for the real thing.
Look out when a real trophy comes along buddy we're just joking around they're both they're both beautiful individuals and uh happy to have
you here and our third guest already downing tito's and soda like it is. I'm running America. Saturday afternoon. It's Daniel Van Kirk, everybody.
Hi, friends.
Hello, friends.
Thanks for being here.
Now back to David.
Listen, David.
David, did you have a cocktail at your table?
It's mostly gone.
Do you want another one?
Because I'll cover it and the club will pay for it.
No, that's okay.
I'll just stick with it.
You don't want a cocktail at all?
I'm competing now, so I got to be like this.
For the listeners at home, David is stretching.
He's in a full squat.
Sanborn stays sharp is one of my favorite jazz albums.
All right.
I love that you have a Game of Thrones last name, by the way. That's pretty fucking dope. Oh, it is? is one of my favorite jazz albums. All right, so...
I love that you have a Game of Thrones last name,
by the way.
That's pretty fucking dope.
Oh, it is?
Sanborn?
That's totally a Game of Thrones.
Absolutely.
Is it House Sanborn?
Yeah.
Is that it?
Come on.
Oh, really?
Yeah, it feels like it.
Oh, I see.
I see what's happening.
Yeah.
I like Springsteen House.
What appearance do you think this is for me?
Because I've only been on the show for like two years.
What?
Me?
Oh, right.
How long has Dan Van Kirk been on the show?
What appearance do you think this is for me?
Do you think we're at 100?
No way.
Do you think we're at 30?
No way.
Someone knows.
They're not here today.
They don't know.
Nobody needs to know.
Dude, there's people who keep an entire compendium of records and wins and losses,
and how many times Sam Levine explained why he should have won.
Every time.
That's true.
Yeah, but, you know, those statistics tend to be, like, not only hard to find,
but then also not really what you're asking.
Okay.
It's a very specific thing you're asking about.
Even I, I don't know if I could figure it out.
If someone made me guess a number,
I would say 43 times.
If someone made me guess, and I bet you I'm low.
Okay.
Because do you count every UCB when I was in the audience?
If you type Dan Van Kirk,
Doug Loves Movies into a search engine,
you think 43 episodes are going to come up.
Well, it won't because, well, you know why.
But you know why.
Oh, is it because we're a shadow band?
Wait, what happened?
Dude, we're fucking shadow band, dude.
No, I bet it's 43 or up.
All right.
Welcome back to Doug Loves Stats. That was fun right. Welcome back to Doug Loves Stats.
That was fun.
Yeah, yeah.
Doug Loves Stats.
I can't believe Eddie just sat there quietly during all of that with nothing to add.
I love stats.
Clearly.
Oh, all right.
So we've met all the contestants, and now it's time to take a quick trip to Recommendation Nation.
That's where each of you
start with you, Dan.
Each of you recommends
a movie for whatever
reasons you want.
Whatever drives you
to recommend a movie.
Okay.
I'm sure it's been done because it's so
recent. It comes up a lot in the same movies. I'm sure it's been done because it's so recent. It comes up a lot.
I mean, the same movies.
Yeah.
I am recommending Dune.
Dune?
Dune.
New Dune.
New Dune.
Twilight, a new Dune.
New.
You can still catch it for a week or so on HBO Max.
But don't.
Catch it big.
Or get it on that big screen.
The more space dust, the better.
Yeah. You watched it?
And?
No.
Can I say,
no amount of weed could get me.
I mean, I watched the whole
thing, and even I had to sign
an affidavit or something afterwards, because
people love to,
the criticism people love to have
is when you say you didn't like something.
Well, did you watch the whole thing?
Of course you watched the whole thing.
Otherwise, you would have said,
didn't even finish it, don't like it.
You would have given that context.
I might have said that,
but I try not to say that about movies
because you never know.
Well, that Villeneuve,
how do I say his last name?
Denise Villeneuve.
Yes.
Villeneuve. I love Blade Runner 2049 name? Denise Villeneuve? Yes. Villeneuve.
I love Blade Runner 2049 so much.
I will put it on sometimes. I did too. Just on. Like no sound.
Oh, well that, you know, it's
probably what it's made for. No, it's
cool. I love that too. And so I think
his pacing and his tone
obviously I enjoy.
So if somebody was like, I really didn't like Blade Runner 2049,
I was like, well, I don't know if you should see Dune.
But if somebody told me they loved it,
I'd be like,
go see Dune.
You'll get more of that vibe
and that pace.
I just,
I love it.
I love it.
But I wouldn't.
Arrival.
Do you like Arrival?
I do like Arrival.
Yes.
Yeah.
Do you like Arrival?
I find all of that stuff
to be not for me.
Okay.
What was the name?
Yeah, Dune.
And the thing about Dune
is I even knew what was going on because I saw the thing about doing is I even knew what
was going on because I saw the David Lynch one a million times because when
it came out I was too young to know any better I was just like going to see this
movie that was a you know it was a big hit even though a lot of people hated it
right and I even went back now and watched old dune sting after new dune
just like for a few say I thought I'll just watch it for a minute or two
to see how different the vibe is.
And they're practically the same movie.
Really? I've never seen Old Dune.
I mean, they're really similar.
I mean, I don't know.
It's just different cinematography and actors, obviously.
But just, and maybe less wooden in this one.
Like David Lynch didn't mind people sounding like
they didn't know what the fuck they were saying.
He never does.
You know what I mean?
I have to go find Atreides and get the melange.
Spice is life.
Was he making a statement that Spice is making everybody stupid?
Sure.
Was Dune David Lynch's idiocracy?
We're almost there.
I think it might have been.
Anyway.
Anyway.
That's your recommendation is New Dune.
Yeah, I enjoyed it.
All right.
That's great.
Did you make that up?
Yeah, I just did.
Wonderful.
Because if you had been like,
oh, no, you haven't seen that meme,
that's how good it was.
I would agree.
That it was like a popular thing I've missed out on, that somebody how good it was. I would have thought that it was like a popular thing
I've missed out on,
that somebody took law and order.
How would I be mad if I go online
and someone's like,
ah, I was at the show
and now I made it.
You guys all have 30 minutes
to make that meme.
David Sanborn?
Yes.
Would you recommend a movie, please?
I guess I'll go real highbrow
since someone else did.
And I'm going to do
Looney Tunes Back in Action.
Oh!
I watched it again recently.
Well, no shit.
You're a house husband.
Yeah, right.
So I was like 11 o'clock
on a Thursday.
I got high and I watched
Looney Tunes Back in Action.
It was great.
It really was? Yeah. Joe Dante directed it. Well, I got high and I watched Looney Tunes back in action. It was great. It really was?
Yeah. Joe Dante directed it.
Well, I'm in. I've never seen it.
Brendan Fraser. I'm doubling.
I love Brendan Fraser. It's great.
He's charming. So is Bugs Bunny.
They're both charming.
Steve Martin is the bad guy. He's crazy.
So is Daffy Duck. It's great. It's worth a watch.
It's worth a watch. It's no Space Jam 2
but it's worth a look.
Did you watch Space Jam 2? No!
Of course you didn't. It's better than Space Jam 2.
You might know the answer.
You probably know the answer, Doug.
Of the three of us, what year
do you think Looney Tunes' Back in Action
came out?
Ooh, 53.
See?
I have no idea either.
I would say like 2002.
I think it's 2004.
Oh.
I have no context.
I don't even remember it existed.
You could have made this up,
and I'm still like,
where's old Brendan Fraser?
50% did make that up.
But I think it is 2004.
But it feels right.
It feels right.
Yeah.
That was in eighth grade.
I watched it a lot as a kid, so I was nine.
It's from when Jenna Elfman was in movies.
So yeah, 2004.
Yes.
Okay.
That would check out.
Yeah.
She's just, that might have been her last one.
No.
Or that Ben Stiller one.
Anyway.
Right?
Keeping the face.
Yes. Her and Ben Stiller and what Anyway. Right? Keeping the face.
Her and Ben Stiller and what's his name?
Ed Norton in A Love Triangle.
One's a priest.
One's a rabbi.
And the third is a woman who's out of her fucking mind.
Why is she flirting with those dorks?
I didn't like that movie.
Oh, no.
What?
Eddie didn't like it?
Why not, Eddie?
I just thought it was pandemic.
What?
Pandemic.
I thought it was damn pandemic.
I don't think you know what you're saying, Eddie.
Have you been drinking? I know what I'm saying.
Frank, recommend one movie.
Finch.
I watched the dude.
Oh, you did?
Yeah, with Tom Hanks.
Jesus, hot out of the oven.
Oh, man.
I do want to say that Tom Hanks, I think, can make me cry every movie he's in.
Yeah.
Yeah, man.
I cried at 1230 in the afternoon.
The man with one red shoe?
Yeah.
Okay.
Up?
Thumbs up?
Thumbs down?
Thumbs up.
It was great.
Really?
Yeah.
Yeah, he's recommending it.
Yeah, absolutely.
That's right.
You're right.
You are.
I guess I wanted to know the gumption line.
Oh, if you feel like crying,
definitely watch that movie.
Does anyone
come to a crying movie?
It's like Turner and Hooch, but
it's just Finch.
He's Finch? Yeah, he's Finch.
Tom Hanks is Finch? Okay.
That's it? No, I don't want to ruin the movie,
but it is. It is a dog. It's Finch
and a dog. A dog, robots. It's got
everything, man. I mean, those are great things.
Those are great things. And don't give it away
because some people don't want to know,
right? But that movie
reminded me of that thing you used to say where
they should have to tell you, and don't give it away,
they should have to tell you if an animal dies in this movie or not. You should have to know going in. that thing you used to say where like, they should have to tell you, and don't give it away. They should have to tell you if an animal dies in this movie or not.
You should have to know going in.
Remember when you used to be on that thing?
You were like, just let me know before I go in.
Am I going to have to see a dog?
I might have said that.
Marley and me fucked me up.
I was not prepared for that.
I drove home in tears.
Marley and me?
Yeah, I've never had a dog and I have like father
issues, you know what I mean? So like
anything with like a dog or like a dad
that cares about his son is just fucking
gets me every time. You should see
frequency. I have seen frequency
and that shit makes me
cry.
Whenever I miss my dad, I'm like, I'm gonna
watch frequency.
Frequently. Yeah, I'm like, I'm going to watch Frequency. Frequently.
Yeah, I frequently watch Frequency.
That was good.
All right, so Finch.
Is it Finch with an exclamation point?
It's just Finch.
I'm kind of wishing it was.
Finch!
I mean, it really...
You're right about the dogs and the robots and Tom Hanks.
But I still worry a little bit about Tom Hanks movies.
Why?
You know, I haven't...
He likes war too much.
He wants to be in space.
I mean, he's kind of in full dad mode now, right?
He's like all dad movies all the time.
Dad, dad, yeah.
So he's not making movies for me anymore.
Right.
But that's not necessarily a bad thing.
But when he did a couple outside the Tom Hanks line stuff, like...
What would you think?
What are outside Tom Hanks?
What's that?
Wachowski's, and he was like a futuristic...
Cloud Atlas.
What is it?
Cloud Atlas. Cloud Atlas. But everybody was like
no, no, no, no, no. We don't want this. So he's like
alright, I'll just keep doing what you... Well, they didn't
want Cloud Atlas. The movie's crazy.
People said they found
it jarring to see him. He plays a character like
with a Cockney accent. I know!
I cried during that movie. It's like that's fucking Tom Hanks.
He did? Yeah. It's got good parts.
It's got really good parts.
Once I saw you
had a Cockney accent,
I was like,
oh,
I gotta finish this movie.
It's long and strange
and every actor in it
plays other races
and sexes,
so it's,
you know,
what they would label
as problematic today,
I guess,
but super weird.
Then,
you know,
Hugh Grant
with Asian makeup,
no thank you.
Oh, no, I definitely gotta watch they show you at the end it's a funny like reveal they go they say like hallie berry and they show
you all the characters she played and you're like that white woman was hallie berry it's like every
one of them play other races it's it's weird it's a i'm kind of into it yeah it's a fun puzzle it's
a long movie you got to sit there for three hours
to get to the thing at the end
where they reveal what they play.
I'd say watch the end first.
Yeah, yeah.
And then go back and watch the movie
already knowing who everybody is.
It's like when you're watching an animated movie
and it drives you too crazy who's doing a voice.
Yes.
Like that's all you can think about.
Yes.
And sometimes it pops into your head,
but other times you have to just go look it up
or you just go crazy. And sometimes it pops into your head, but other times you have to just go look it up or you just go crazy.
These are great recommendations.
I don't know what could possibly win in a competition,
all of them up against each other,
because it's three very different things.
So thanks for that.
And let's go to our first commercial break.
We'll be right back.
And we're back!
Yeah! Yeah!
Fuck off!
During the break, we talked about the prize bag,
and then I have this little biography of Dr. Fauci
that I've given away.
And what'd you say about that, Dan?
Oh, the book itself.
It's a small book.
Yeah, it's smaller than Chicken Soup for the College Soul.
It's also pretty fucked up that the title of his book is I Don't Know I'm Winging It.
Yeah, like I said, it's just sort of like maybe his story's not over yet.
Maybe it's a little soon.
He doesn't have a mask on on the back page?
What an asshole.
Yeah, the front page and the back page is such a short book.
They're not that far apart.
They should be careful.
There's a blurb.
This book made me cry, Frank Castillo.
That is so...
No, how did Frank get a...
Why would they get a comedian to do a blurb for him?
I don't know.
That's a great blurb for you.
Frank Castillo got a blurb.
That should go on your resume, that you blurbed Fauci.
All right, so we determined that there are some cool name tags in the audience,
but David's going to play for his beloved Abby.
And then we also got Bill Holocaust is who Frank is playing for.
And Daniel's playing for Nicole that we spoke to earlier.
She didn't know enough Clint Eastwood movies.
Which is never a bad thing.
That's not a bad thing.
I would have helped her.
But she was on one of those
what was that
the Housewives of Carmel or something
he was on one of those shows
he was?
yeah
he didn't show up much in the reality show
it was more about the rest of his family
and when he did show up
he didn't seem to be too into it
you just see him over in the corner
talking to a piece of furniture
you've been here long I feel like he'd love those seem to be too into it. You just see him over in the corner talking to a piece of furniture.
You've been here long.
I feel like he'd love those because it's just one shot and then out.
Yeah, right? There's no take two.
That's a good fucking joke, David.
David just made up
a joke. By the way, believe it.
David wants to move.
David's been cracking jokes since he
got here. Dude, do them on mic.
That was a great joke.
I'm 100% with you right now.
I thought he said it on mic.
I know he did.
I was playing along that Frank was like,
he's just been saying jokes off mic the whole show.
That's a good joke.
I appreciate that.
Thank you.
I appreciate it.
His wife's like, do not give him
any ideas. Dude, you've got
the time. We're already here on
a Saturday in the afternoon.
Get a
tight five. We'll let you
open.
Justin,
this kid tonight.
I know Jeff. I'll tell
him, fuck it. You're out, David.
I'm already getting bumped on guest spots.
Oh, you're in.
You're opening for David.
I'm so fucking proud of you.
You have no idea.
That was a good joke.
Fuck, that was good.
Levels, dude.
So for anybody listening that wonders about the prize bag stuff
that we talked about during the break,
I make videos of all the prizes and put them on my Instagram
at YouDon'tKnowDoug.
But also, I guess I should put them on the Douglas Movies Twitter account
as well, because, you know, that's a good place for it.
Anyway, i'll do
that moving forward but our first game today is the og ocb game which probably doesn't mean much
to any of my guests but we've had two different games called the ocb game and this is the first one. Okay. And this is how it goes.
It's going to start, we're going alphabetically,
like we often do at the beginning.
We're going to start with Frank,
and then we're going to go to David, and then to Dan.
Frank, I'm going to name an actor or actress,
and then you're going to tell me how many movies
you think you can name that that person is in
how many you can name
in 60 seconds
which is longer than you think it is
but then also
not that long
it's kind of surprising
everybody either has
too much time left or
the opposite of that
then our next player, David, will have the opportunity
to bid that he can name more movies and he can say a number. And it moves on to Dan,
around like that until somebody challenges the person ahead of them to do that. And then
if they do it and succeed they get the
point if they fail the challenger
gets the point
awesome fair enough
yeah and
you know I try not to use
the most famous
you know not the biggest movie star
names but also not people that
everybody's like who's that
but of course there might be some of that here, and unfortunately, you'll just
have to try to bluff.
Yeah.
The listeners, these nice folks over
here, they know that people never bluff in this game, and they just
immediately blurt out, I have no idea who that that is I don't know how many movies they I can't
name any movies they've been in but we'll see how this goes today with you
Frank how many Emma Stone motion pictures films that feature in any size role, Emma Stone, how many do you think you can name in 60 seconds?
Six.
That is a strong opening bid.
I feel like you could name six, but what does David think about that?
Seven.
Whoa!
Somebody came to play!
Daniel, then Kirk,
can you name more than seven
Emma Stone jizz-oints?
Oh, man.
Challenger!
Okay, hold on, Eddie.
Challenger! Okay, hold on, Eddie. Challenge.
Okay, hold on.
I think I'm going to challenge him.
Oh, shit.
That's interesting that you're just capitulating to Eddie's desires,
but that's cool.
It's still your decision.
It feels like the right call.
That means that our new friend has to name,
how many did you say, 20?
Seven?
Seven.
Teen?
Seven.
Seven Emma Stone movies.
Dude, your wife just left.
For the listener at home, she left.
He was like, of course I know seven.
She kind of looks like Emma Stone.
Okay, and just pause in between each one you say
so I can say what number we're on.
Keep track.
I'll count it out.
Until you get to seven.
Are you a redhead?
Yeah, you definitely got seven, Doc.
I believe in you.
I don't know what just happened.
You want me to count it out?
No, no, I'll do it.
Okay, I'll do it.
Okay, I got it.
I got it. I got it, no, I'll do it. Okay, I'll do it. Okay, I got it. I got it.
I got it, Eddie.
I'm on it.
I need to practice for when you're not here, Eddie.
I need to practice, too.
For why?
I'm not good at counting.
Oh, well, then I definitely don't need your help if you're not even good at it.
You got it.
You got my help.
Why don't you volunteer if you're going to be bad at it?
I don't know.
Alright, here we go. We'll do it together, Eddie, so we can make sure we get it
right. Alright, David.
Seven Emma Stone
movies. Your time starts now.
Zombieland. One.
Zombieland 2 Double Tap.
Two. La La Land.
Three. Easy A.
Four.
Superbad. Two. La La Land. Three. Three. Easy A. Four. Four.
Super Bad.
Five.
Five.
The Amazing Spider-Man.
Six. Seven.
Seven.
Six.
The Amazing Spider-Man 2.
What's that?
Does that have more words?
I think that has more words in the title.
Is there another Emma Stone you could say?
Aloha.
Oh, you don't have to leave you're welcome to stay he did it everybody
holy shit david coming out of the box throwing stones
seven of them and uh of course she's got a few other ones
so that was
very well done
I don't know if this is a spoiler for the Amazing
Spider-Man movies but does she die in one
or two
how dare you
I don't know if anyone's watching those anymore
but well people are still watching
the fucking Looney Tunes movie from
2004 so I'm going to assume someone out there is very upset with you right now.
They had a solid three seconds to pause it when I said the word spoiler.
It's a whole culture.
Guy tells one good joke and now he's over here just swinging himself around.
No, I'm with him.
Just fast forward right when someone says spoiler.
Just jump to the end of the podcast.
You don't want to take any chances.
Yeah.
Good job.
Do you know the answer to this question?
I have no idea.
What question?
Does the girl from Easy A
die in the Spider-Man movie?
Oh, oh, oh.
I know she does.
I just don't know if it's one or two.
If she dies in Andrew Garfield's Spider-Man,
it must just be the second one
because there were only two.
That's what I thought.
Yeah.
Was she a birdman?
I know they're talking about
bringing every one of them,
everybody that's ever been in a Spider-Man back,
but maybe they can't do it with her
because maybe...
She's dead.
Maybe she's dead.
Weird.
Yeah, I don't know how that works.
I mean, Spider-Man's just gotten too confusing for me.
I'm just like, you know, I recognize the suit,
and I like when he jumps around and stuff.
Dude, that's your blurb for the movie.
Yeah.
Doug Benson, I recognize the suit,
and I like when he jumps around and stuff.
Get over here, kids.
We're leaving.
I just can't. I can't reboot
every ten years.
I guess it's cool
that Doc Octopus
as played by
Alfred Molina is my
favorite villain. One of my favorite villains
of all movies. So I guess
I should be grateful he's coming back, but
it's confusing.
And also, didn't he die? No.
He was probably just dispatched
in a way where he could have survived it,
because he's got eight arms.
Mm-hmm.
Probably work
something out.
Actually, though, no.
He really, the train just
smashes him and fires.
Or is that green goblin
I'm so confused I am too
yeah yeah so anyway
stop making things over again
just keep moving forward like you know what I mean
I want to see a geriatric spider-man
it's not minuto
you don't need to replace every time
they get they start looking like an adult
alright so anyway time they get, they start looking like an adult.
Alright.
So anyway,
like I said,
David's winning this thing,
but these other fellas still have a chance.
And this next round will start with Frank,
then we'll go to Dan,
and then we'll go to David.
And this next actor actor I've really
come around on this guy I used to not like him for reasons I can't even put my
finger on and now I think he's the one of the best Ethan Hawke yeah yeah he's
uh you know he's been doing it since he was a kid.
Maybe I just didn't like his kid movies, you know,
as much as the things he's been doing lately.
We'll probably name some of them, but I've really liked it.
How many?
Me?
Frank, yeah.
Damn it.
Four.
Oh.
Four.
Yeah, I think I can do four Ethan Hawke movies.
Okay.
And we'll move to Dan.
I can do five.
Okay.
Ish.
Yeah.
I like when anybody adds one.
It's a great strategy.
I'm going to challenge you.
Oh, no.
I fucking punked you, bro.
I fucking got you, dude.
Oh, dude.
What if I was that guy?
I think you are that guy, though.
You can name five Ethan Hawke movies, right?
I'm not that guy, dude.
Well, you can name five Ethan Hawke movies, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, it'll be easy.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Ready?
She can't pretend to be the I fucking tricked you dude when you just tricked the dude.
I said ish, which made him wonder, could he do it?
The answer is C.
Your time starts now.
Okay, let's go with The Purge.
That's number one.
What?
I didn't care for that movie.
Really?
I'm just eating into your time.
I know you are.
Let's go with...
Yeah, you got four more to go and you only have 15 seconds. Let's go with
Training Day. Okay, that's two.
Two! Let's go...
Let's go with Boyhood.
Yeah, let's go with it. Yeah.
Three. Let's go with
Before Sunrise.
Three and four.
Let's go.
Just one more, man.
With... It's a fucking trilogy.
What's wrong with you?
Before Sunset.
Is that right?
Yes.
Yes.
You did it!
Yay!
I really was hung up because I couldn't think of the third.
What is the third?
Third what?
Oh, because it's so confusing.
Two of them are befores and one of them's after.
After midnight or after something?
Before sunset, before afternoon.
It's like the movies are the rules for mogwais.
Before breakfast.
I get them mixed up every time, but there's three of them and they all sound the same.
But a little bit different.
I was like, how can I not remember the fucking third
but now I feel normal about it.
Yeah, nobody knows it.
Wasn't it in some Shakespeare movie?
Was he in Dangerous Liaisons?
No, that was Malkovich and Uma.
Wasn't like Keanu in that or somebody?
Yes, Keanu was in it.
Anyway, we got more.
We got more because we got a hot match going,
because both David and Dan, the two Ds, are on the board.
Dan and Dave.
Yeah.
Frank, it's time to stop effing around.
Oh, that was a great joke.
Thank you.
Yeah.
Thank you.
I'm so glad we have a joke monitor here today.
I give it up.
I give it up.
All right.
So, Frank, you get to start again.
And then it's going to go to David and then to Dan.
And great actress.
Tons of credits.
Might be before your time.
Sally Field.
Can I challenge myself?
Yeah, you could challenge yourself.
Sally Field? Just think about all the great movies that Gidget...
Oh, Sally Fields!
Yeah, poor Field.
Two.
People like to say Fields.
I think that's a hell of an opening bid
because anything could happen
between that bid
and when it gets back to you.
David certainly seems like
he would come up with
more than two Sally Field movies.
Oh, yeah, three.
He's going three, Dan.
Are you going to trick him again?
How dare you?
I will go.
I
will go with
five.
Frank, I feel
like we all
know what's going to happen now.
I'm going to go with seven.
There it is.
That's my fucking boy.
I tricked you guys this whole time.
My grandmother loves Sally Fields.
It's Field.
Damn it.
Dude, I love that twist.
What a twist.
We're a fucking Shyamalan movie up here.
Yeah, this is going to be...
This is getting ugly because...
David, do you think you can do more than seven?
Are you sandbagging two?
Sally Field movies.
The Flying Nun, of course, from television.
I'm going to challenge him.
Fuck!
It's such a bold bid,
but I had a feeling that you were Bluffy the Vampire.
I believed in you.
I don't know Sally Field movies.
Really?
Yeah.
I can't tell you what race seat she is.
Oh, well, you should.
I'm going to guess a white woman, right?
All right, cool.
Was she the original Mary Poppins?
I'll tell you.
Yes. Yes, she was. Thispins? I'll tell you. Yes.
Yes, she was.
This is how bad I don't know.
I will just guess.
Oh, wait.
You're still going to guess? No.
You do know so many
Sally Fields. Oh, do I? Am I going to be so
upset when I finally... A couple, you'll be like,
oh, fuck, that chick? Yeah.
Was she in like...
She in like Mrs.
Down for her? Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh!
Drop the mic!
Drop the mic!
Drop the mic!
Oh, you're doing the Chappelle slap.
He did a Chappelle slap.
That's how confident he felt. Oh, it's so funny. Alright, you're doing the Chappelle slap. He did a Chappelle slap. That's how confident he felt.
Oh, it's so funny.
All right, I know one.
Wait, so you're not going to, there's no other?
Didn't that help you to write?
Can't you just picture that lady in another scenario?
I know, but it's a...
Her husband is in her maid.
I was thinking of that, and you said it,
so if you want, I'll try it.
We'll do, like, opening scene Ghostbusters shit. I'll try again.
Ready? Dude, you got this.
There's no way he's
going to do it. Ghostbusters. No!
Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
What's the one with Beethoven?
Your time's almost up.
Sorry.
Can I tell him what I was trying to send them?
Sure.
Forrest Gump.
She's in Forrest Gump.
She had the great pleasure of
within a few years time
getting to play Tom Hanks' husband
and mother.
With only two years in between
the two productions.
When she played his mother and his husband, that was wild.
That was a really, really weird one because that one was called Not Without My Daughter.
All right.
So congratulations, David.
You just did it.
You won that game.
Dude!
And Frank, I should tell you that the first couple of games don't even matter.
You know, it's nothing to get worked up about because, you know,
David knows that all he won for winning that game is he gets to go first in our next game.
And that is a game that I call Build a Title.
Love it.
We rarely play it these days
because the guests don't understand it.
We start with a title, Frank, of a movie.
And then each of my guests adds a title
to that title that fits in,
like has a word that it begins or ends with
that fit in to make it a longer
title, to build a title.
If you can't
think of one, I'll help you once.
I'll be your lifeline once, because I'll probably be able to think
of one, but if I can't think of one,
I'll try to help too. We're both fucked.
Eddie, I'm
going to strangle you.
And then... You do that, I'll falconer
you.
Alright, take back the strangling thing.
Take back the falconer.
Let's just cut Eddie's mic.
All right, so then...
And then it just goes down the line,
and each of you has a lifeline in me
once to try to keep this going,
because this game kind of falls apart quickly,
usually, is what happens. of falls apart quickly, usually,
is what happens. And since the holidays are approaching, I picked a holiday title that I think is easy to build on at both ends. It's a motion picture called Home for the
Holidays. So we'll start with David, since he won that last game. Then we'll start with David since you won that last game
then we'll go to Dan
then we'll go to Frank
just give Frank a chance to feel this out
a little bit
what would you like to add
to Home for the Holidays
Home for the Holidays
and Confused
oh I like it
low hanging fruit
yeah there's so many movies with days the word days and Confused. Oh, I like it. Low-hanging fruit. Low-hanging fruit.
Yeah, there's so many movies with dazed,
dazed, the word dazed,
you know,
that's a nice twist,
I guess, dazed.
And Confused
also makes it
tough on that end
because there's not a lot
of movies that begin
with confused.
I dare say there are none.
Oh, but I figured out
how you could work it. I got it.
Alright, but anyway, it's Dan's turn. What would you
like to add, Dan?
Oh, for the holidays
and confused.
I will go with
Hmm.
Man, I was really hoping to go on the end of that last one.
I guess I'll go...
No Place Like Home for the Holidays.
There's a movie called No Place Like Home? Yeah, I thought it was a movie that came out in the late 80s.
Normally this would be a bit, but I genuinely think that.
I believe you.
I mean, it might have been like a
made for TV thing.
Lifetime.
Could have been a radio play.
Could have been, yeah. Could have been a lot of stuff.
But I'm going to rule it out.
Okay.
Doug, let's use you for a lifeline out the gate.
Oh, shit.
Let's do it.
Damn it, so soon.
Okay.
All right, I'm going to go with...
Gung, Home for the Holidays and Confused.
Love it.
So now, Frank, you need a movie that ends with the word gung.
Doug, you might have just given me the win. Or begins with Confused.
Sorry about that.
Oh, I have one for you.
I also have one for you.
What? Oh, fucking A.
Kung? Kung?
Oh, oh, oh, wait, what?
What's the first word?
Gung.
Oh, dang.
Right, but, you know, you can use parts of words
to be fair we should tell you that
you can pick a movie that ends
in the word gun
oh okay alright
alright
fit into gung
gung
that's how we should all say gung ho
gung ho
oh fuck well yeah I thought I was helping but That's how we should all say gung ho. Gung, gung, gung, gung, gung. Oh, fuck.
Well, yeah, I thought I was helping, but...
Do you want to use me as your lifeline?
Please, dear God, yes.
Okay.
I'm going to go on the other end.
I'm going to go gung home for the holidays and confused cars.
Ooh, that's great.
Yes.
Yes. Ah. Yes.
Now you got to do something that begins with cars.
Or ends in gun or gung.
But it's on David.
Oh, okay.
So gung, home for the holidays, then confused, cars, three.
I love it.
So easily could have gone cars, too, but he cars three.
That's how David rolls.
Yeah, he keeps it interesting.
He's a master.
He's just been waiting for his moment.
He's a trophy that's waiting to win.
Yeah.
Trophies have feelings too.
They don't want to end up on just any shelf.
Gone home for the holidays and confused cars three ninjas.
Oh, okay.
I agree. That deserves a smattering of applause. Cars 3 Ninjas. Ooh. Okay. Now we're talking.
I agree.
That deserves a smattering of applause.
All right.
That's perfect.
That's the perfect amount.
You nailed it.
I don't know if you guys practiced.
I don't know what you guys do on your weekends,
but that was perfect.
All right.
All right.
All right.
Gung.
All right.
What was it?
Gung.
Gung ho.
Gung ho.
Gung home for the holidays
and confused
cars. Three
ninja assassins.
Oh,
you sneaky boy.
Ass-assins.
What are you going to do with that, David?
The S on the end of that really just fucks the whole thing, doesn't it?
It kind of does, yeah.
I guess there's probably a movie that begins with sins.
That's, yeah.
I can't think of one that wouldn't be something that's direct to Showtime.
Do those count?
I don't know.
No.
I've never figured that out.
All right, I'm going to throw it out there.
Okay.
Gung home for the holidays in confused cars,
three ninja assassins of my father.
Ooh, the sins of my father. I like it.
That's where I would have gone to, Dan. Proud of you.
That is so good.
And father, that's
a real, he's really handing you a
I know. You can just take
it right into the end zone.
Let's hear it, Dan.
Okay.
Gong home for the holidays and
confused cars
three ninjas assassins
of my father of the bride.
Whoa.
Gung home for the
holidays and confused
cars three
ninjas assassins
of my father.
Of the bridesmaids.
Yeah, player.
Wow, and the S really kills you again there.
Bridesmaids.
I don't know if that would work.
Oh, maids might.
I don't know.
I said too much. I'm going to try something.
Okay, I like it.
Try it out, Doug.
The naked gun hoe for the holidays.
Then confused cars.
What's after three?
Three ninja assassins of my father's, of the bridesmaids.
Yeah. Right? Youmaids. Yeah.
Right?
You did it.
Shit.
I mean, we're just trying stuff.
Can I try something, too?
No, and I should say that Naked Gun probably has several more words
like from the files of Police Squad or something like that.
But, you know, David's doing such a great job,
and I love that this title is getting so long.
So we're back to you, Dan.
I'm interested to see how you feel about this.
Okay.
I might have to give you a gimme also.
Now and then naked gun.
Ho.
Now and then naked?
T-E-H-N, baby.
Yes.
Oh, you went after the the.
You're using the the.
And into the end, gives you then.
Now and then, naked, gone home for the holidays.
There's a movie called The Naked?
Now and then, player.
The Naked Now and Then?
Now and then, naked.
Not later, later.
Yes.
No, I don't see it.
Now and then.
All right, I'll respect the commissioner.
Controversy.
I respect it.
The first sound in naked is nay.
Where is nay coming from?
Naked.
Now and then.
Just the movie Now and Then.
So I'm taking T-H-E from the,
and then I'm grabbing the N from naked. So I'm taking T-H-E from the, and then I'm grabbing the N from
naked. So I'm going now and then naked gun. Yeah. I still don't understand. I mean, you
could say the godfather naked gun, the way you're doing it. No, no. Cause he's using
the, the in the naked gun. So it's the, then like he's putting that up. He kept saying
I'm using the, the. I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about?
So you're adding the the when I ruled on accepting he didn't even give the full title.
Yes.
But also the and then.
Also, I should have just immediately reacted to that stretch.
I guess it comes down to, are you looking at it on paper or are you hearing it phonetically?
Right.
And this is a podcast people listen to.
Fair enough.
So that's the way I go with it.
Okay.
So I go back to my earlier comment.
I'm going to try something to which you said I have to give you a gimme. I do have to give you a gimme because you've earned it.
But holy shit.
I know.
It was a leap.
Now and then.
Some would say I didn't make it.
Okay. Now and then. Some would say I didn't make it. Okay.
Now and then.
Yep.
Frank, did you figure anything out while you were listening to us go through that?
Yeah.
Okay.
So you accepted that?
I guess so.
He didn't accept it.
I told him before he even explained it to me that I needed to accept it.
So I got to go off now?
Because David still got me as a lifeline.
So you're both fucked.
This is true.
The great thing is
if David wins, you know you're
gonna cry.
Alright, what was the last word?
Bridesmaids.
Bridesmaids.
Yeah, you did it.
Yeah. Alright, what was the last word? Bridesmaids. Bridesmaids. Yeah, you did it. AIDS.
Yeah.
You're not going to find that movie that starts with AIDS.
I just whispered AIDS to myself like three times.
I was like, maybe there's an AIDS movie.
AIDS the movie.
It's called Kids.
AIDS colon.
Oh, come on.
Okay. Okay.
Damn.
Oh, fuck.
Yeah, that's tough.
Now, now.
Yeah, yeah.
Fuck.
Don't worry about it.
You did great.
There's still one more game.
David. I need my lifeline on this. Okay. You did great. There's still one more game. David?
I need my lifeline on this.
Okay. What do I gotta do?
Ends and now
begins with maids.
We might be dead.
This might be a win
for Frank.
Wait.
Who was the last one to give a good answer?
Dan.
A good answer?
David.
A gimme?
Dan had the gimme, that's for sure.
Yeah, because I can't think of maids.
I can't come up with maids anything.
What's that?
Maid in Manhattan.
Maid in Manhattan doesn't count because of the S.
The S screws it up.
Maids in Manhattan. Isn't that? I S where S screws it up Maid of Manhattan
isn't that
what's
I know right
isn't there like a
life is
life is
what's that
Life Force
the freaking
that one
dumb
oh it's life itself
never mind
yeah
that's a tough one
I have no idea
and then a movie
that ends in now
I guess there's a few
maybe some of those
Don't Look Now
now you see me now you don't I don't know that's not that doesn't end in now I guess there's a few, maybe some of those. Don't Look Now.
Now You See Me, Now You Don't.
I don't know.
That doesn't end in now.
No, it just starts.
But there's probably a few.
But I'm going to go ahead and call this,
and I'm going to give it to Dan Van Kurt.
Yes.
Controversial.
Yeah.
I don't feel like I deserve it.
I would not have done that if I thought it would have won it.
It doesn't.
Don't worry about it, Dan.
I can't believe I confidently whispered AIDS to myself three times.
Dude, I do it all the time.
Like, oh, I got it! Rent!
That was the other...
Yeah.
You're good, too.
Alright, well, we're going to come back,
and Dan's going to go first in our final game,
which anybody still, it's anybody's game.
Anybody can win, and we're going to do that after this break.
We'll be right back.
We're back.
We're back.
Caw, caw.
That was fun.
We not only gave away a bunch of OCB rolling papers, but we also came to the determination.
David figured out that he could have used Sin City as a title there
at the end of that
and could have kept going
because City, of course,
a lot of movies begin with City.
But still, great job so far,
David Sanborn.
Agreed.
What is it?
What's the name of the other Sanborn?
It's David Sandborn.
You have the same name as that guy?
Yep.
My dad thought it was funny.
Oh, okay.
Holy shit.
He thought it was funny or he loves that guy?
Well, my mom always wanted David and my dad thought it was funny, so he agreed.
Your dad did a bit with your name?
Yep.
It runs in the family.
You know what?
And now you're here, motherfucker.
Crushing.
I've been talking myself out of that,
your first name being David,
every time I say it, I'm like,
I think I just switched over to the famous David Sanborn.
It's the same.
I don't realize it, but you're both David Sanborn.
Do you get weird social media follows?
No.
No.
It's like Office Space.
The one guy's named Michael Bolton in Office Space.
That's your life.
Yeah.
I did have an IMDB at one point, and his was much higher than mine.
Oh, sure.
But he's also now, like, people rarely bring him up to you, right?
You have to run into some old asshole like me.
No.
Well.
But, you know what I mean?
He's aging out.
Young people don't know
who he is.
It's definitely an older generation.
Time for a new Sanborn, dog.
Yeah, man.
Yeah, you're the new David Sanborn.
Yes, I'll be the Sanborn
you hope to see in the world.
Just fucking own it, man.
Yeah.
Be the new Sanborn.
Heck yeah.
They made a new dune.
You can have a new Sanborn.
Sanborn identity, dog.
That was on the...
Yeah.
And we'll see.
You're going to make me cry. Hilarious cry We'll try to set you off on the right path
With a win today
I shouldn't say that, it's anybody's game
Everybody's got a chance
We're not going to cheat
Except for that last thing with Dan
But it just means you get to go first
In this next game Dan, which isn't even necessarily
The best position, I don't even know what's a good position because we're playing uh last person standing oh yeah
and that of course is a game where uh the uh pot has been growing i wrote down pre-pandemic a name
of an actress because i wanted to start playing this game with actresses names exclusively because people are more thrown by
remembering movies that actresses were in
and so
I'm so high right now. Nobody's guessed the name in your wall. Yeah. Yeah, the edibles definitely kicked in. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah
I'm talking about the wallet. Yeah wallet wallet
Edibles definitely kicked in for me.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm talking about the wallet.
Yeah, the wallet.
Wallet!
For God!
Yeah.
So there's a name in my wallet that if it matches, it's an actress, and no one's matched,
so I keep every live show we do, I add $20 to the pot. So now the person's going to win $300 if they name the actress whose name's been in my wallet
for a couple years, written down on a little piece of paper.
What's the pot set?
300 bucks?
It's at $300.
If we don't get it today...
No hint?
Just out the gap?
It's just actress, but also if people have been listening to the show,
they might have somewhat an idea because we've been doing this on all,
like I said, all the live ones.
So, and also Frank, once we get the name of an actress,
then the three of you, because we're running out of time,
are going to take turns naming movies that that actress was in.
But if everybody's shaky on the first actress,
I'll get more than one.
And I'll also give more chances to give the money away.
So it might be multiple actresses that we end up playing with.
So you're going to get a super famous actress,
and then H. John Benjamin.
Yeah, yeah.
Okay.
I'm glad that Frank did a little stretch there to get ready.
My hips are killing me from this drive from Los Angeles.
I thought you were really getting ready to compete, but getting up and really stretching everything out.
Like, oh, I'm going to give my all to this competition.
All right, so, that being said, please raise your hand
if you would like to suggest an actress
that you think might be in my wallet.
I like to work my way from the front to the back.
Checkered shirt, got here before anybody else, I assume.
Brought his checkered shirt, ran across that finish line.
Waved his own shirt around. What's your name,
dude? Carl. Carl?
What's your suggestion, Carl?
Lucille Ball.
Okay,
first of all, fuck you, Carl.
Can we get the check for Carl?
That'd be great.
No, I mean,
she's, you know, in the news lately
because Nicole Kidman's going to do a movie where it's,
hey, look, Lucille Ball's acting and looking a lot like Nicole Kidman.
That's my prediction.
That's why she's in the trailer, so very slightly.
But anyway, Carl, no.
Could any of you even name one
Lucille Ball movie I can think of one
and I don't even know
if I'd get the title right
no Lucille Ball 2 and the
Electric Boogaloo
she was in a movie
with her husband Desi called
The Very Long Trailer
Long Long Trailer god damn it
I knew I'd get it wrong
was she in the film production of
Auntie Mame? Oh,
maybe not. I forget.
It was Angela Lansbury and
yeah, maybe she was in that. But anyway.
Wasn't she in a Jay-Z music video?
Well,
I don't know, but also that wouldn't count.
So, anyway.
So, Lucille Ball's off the table.
Let's get serious I've you know it
was a good guess in terms of like of course no one else has guessed that but
this is someone that's just very well known very much working today actress
that somehow has miraculously not gotten mentioned for all these many times so
the gentleman here on the end have been waiting patiently.
What's your name?
Warren.
Warren?
What's your suggestion, Warren?
Dame Judy Dench.
Another tough one for all the fellas up here,
I'm guessing.
And also not in my wallet.
This lady right here in the second row.
What's your name?
Lisa.
And change your answer.
I mean, change the name.
Giving you another chance.
Who else?
Emma Thompson.
I know, you said it again.
I'm trying to not say that one into the microphone.
Trying to just dismiss it.
If you have another one.
Try one more. Reese Witherspoon one more okay that's way better way that's a goddamn national treasure you said right there yeah so so we got this
witherspoon to you guys so we got reese witherspoon that's a pretty pretty damn good
one but not not in my wallet uh and emma th Emma Thompson's also a terrific name, but I
want to get these guys some competitive
possibilities
here. So let's try
one more. The gentleman in the front row with
the mask and the
character on his
shirt that's wearing a mask.
Did you guys
consult with each other before you left the house today?
It's a Texas Chainsaw Massacre guy.
What's his name?
Edgar Allan Poe.
Oh, that's Edgar Allan Poe.
Apologies to Edgar Allan Poe and all that was near and dear to him.
Oh, you thought it was Chaplin?
Yeah.
It's hard to see with the lights.
It could be Hitler.
It could be a lot of people.
It's Hitler?
What the fuck's wrong with you, dude?
He's not wearing...
Yeah, people forget Hitler and Edgar Allan Poe.
Homies.
Oh, my God.
What's your name?
Gary.
Gary.
Okay, Gary.
What would you like to suggest?
Have you left a hint on social media recently about who...
Oh, he thinks I might have left a hint on social media.
I don't think I did, but, you know, the mind does things when you're up in the middle of the night doing dabs.
Doug, you've become like
the game creator in
Ready Player One. You're like leaving
Easter eggs around for people to
find. I love it. I just want to fucking
end this thing. Somebody's
going to make some pretty decent dough
and I'm not collecting interest
on it.
I've had the money in my wallet
this whole time. That would be great if whoever wins
it's technically a loan.
And they have to pay you back over time.
No, it's
$300. I'll count it out
into your hand.
Just like Chuck
Woolery on Scrabble.
Every once in a while somebody would win $1,000 bonus dollars,
and he'd go, $100, $200, $300.
What?
I don't know.
Then he did Love Connections and said, we'll be back in two and two.
All right.
Gary, who'd you say?
I haven't said.
Oh, okay, good.
I'm pretty sure I haven't said.
I'm glad you haven't.
Oh, what's the hint?
Because I said something about Glenn Close.
I said my hot take of the day the other day was that Glenn Close should have three Oscars.
She has no Oscars.
I think she should have at least three.
But anyway, great name.
Not in my wallet.
We have to move on.
We've got such a short amount of time to play this game.
Yes.
we've got such a short amount of time to play this game.
They got two packed houses
coming in tonight to see Jeff die
and potentially guest sets
from Frank Castillo.
And this guy.
David. You really gonna go up tonight, you think?
Sanborn. No. David Sanborn.
I think I got my one joke out.
You know what?
Knowing yourself is a pretty strong fucking move.
Proud of you.
You should join an improv group, though,
because you came up with that joke situationally.
You didn't come here with that joke.
You came up with it in the moment.
What if the whole time she's been writing jokes for him?
Oh, my God.
Then he's luckier than we even thought.
Let him be good at something.
Give him one win.
This could be it.
The films of, I'm not going to play
this time. I like to play usually, but we got
two minutes. The films of
Glenn Close and Reese Witherspoon
starting
with Dan, then Frank, then
David. Well, I mean, I have to.
Good luck to you all. I have to, right?
Go, do it. Fear. Okay,
Fear starring Mark Wahlberg.
Frank?
We'll do Reese Witherspoon, me, myself, and Irene.
What?
No, is that not who Reese Witherspoon is?
Don't come out of the gate wrong, buddy.
He knows the time.
We need you to walk the line here.
Oh, fuck!
And say an actual...
I can't remember her face.
Walk the line. Walk the line.
Walk the line.
Okay, David.
Legally Blonde.
Yes.
Take that from me.
Sweet Home Alabama.
Yes.
Frank.
Cheaper by the dozen.
She's out.
I mean, he's out.
Legally Blonde 2.
Oh, fuck!
Let's wait. What's the rest of it? Red, white, and
blonde? Red, white, yeah, I think so.
We'll give it to you.
Election. One minute.
Home Again.
I was trying to think of that one the other day.
Oh, man. You know what?
What would it mean to him
versus what would it mean to me?
Don't.
Don't.
Don't run the clock.
I won't.
I won't.
I won't run the clock.
Come on.
Glenn Close.
Glenn Close.
Oh, yeah.
Fatal Attraction.
Yeah, there you go.
The Wife.
Oh, nice.
She lost the Oscar for that one, too.
Oh, what the fuck is that?
Oh, yeah, right.
What's that one where she's all like, hey!
I know, I love it.
Let's
go
with... You can do this, Dan.
You know what? Just say it.
I can't. Glenn Close or
Reese Witherspoon. I know. I know you can.
I have one more if you want to like...
Oh!
Oh!
David wants you to keep going.
You can do it.
Reese, I love you so much.
He was like, I ain't taking the win like this.
Reese.
Oh, dang it.
This means war.
That's it.
You lose.
You lose.
David Sanborn.
I'm so excited.
Go, David!
I am so psyched that I get to put in the listing for this show
that David Sanborn is a guest.
Oh, yeah.
Whoa!
I'm going to hashtag the shit out of it.
I'm going to tag the real David Sanborn.
Whenever you bring up audience people,
you should start saying, does anyone have a
famous person's name? And they
automatically get to join.
Oh, that would be a weird selection
process. Does anybody
else here have a famous person's first and last
name? Similarly?
No? See, it's hard to find.
There's not
a lot of David Sanborn
types out there. There's not a lot of David Sanborn types out there
there's not a lot of parents that are like
I'm gonna give you a name you'll never live down
what's your middle name?
Donovan
wait wait wait
Jonathan or Donathan?
Donovan
I heard Donathan
I did too
and I was willing to accept it
I was not
yeah but when he goes family name
you'll be like okay you got some old Irish in you
alright so
we gotta wrap this up
do you have any plugs
David
David's
your IMDb page
oh yeah check out my IMDb page that hasn't been updated since 2013 David's Your IMDB page?
Oh yeah, check out my IMDB page that hasn't been updated since 2013
But what if somebody wants to follow you on the gram after this?
Give it out
I don't have one
I like this guy more every fucking minute
I'm telling you, he's a perfect trophy husband
He's not out there
He's not out here fucking around on the Explore page.
He's not trying to tell everybody she took him to
Tulum again. That's his business.
Yeah.
He's just got that Zanga blog.
He's not posting
any thirst traps.
But thank you,
David, for being such a great guest.
And you and Abby get to
share the prizes.
So congratulations on that and I
put them all back in the bag but like
you can do it. I gotta
do something. I made a whole mess
of the stage with all your prizes but
they'll be easy to scoop up and put in that
beautiful bag. It's a really nice bag.
You're gonna fight over that
and I think the trophy's gonna lose.
What do you like to plug Frank Castillo you like to plug, Frank Castillo?
Just my Instagram, Frank Castillo on Instagram.
I post stuff there.
All right.
And Dan Van Kirk.
Yes.
A couple things.
Dumb People Town with the Sklar Brothers.
Just three dumb news stories with great guests like Doug Benson.
Pen Pals with me and Rory Scovel, we read your letters and we have started having
guests.
So in the future, Doug Benson will be on that as well.
I've always wanted to say this on a show and I've never gotten to until now.
I have some TV and film stuff coming up that I don't get to talk about yet.
But it's really cool.
So look for that.
And then I start my tour back up in March.
Otherwise, I do digital shows
that are just good vibes and good hangs there's a couple people here tonight that come to those
shows you can ask them if you don't believe me everything is at danielvankirk.com that's a great
great great piece of self-promotion you you said it all all I have to add to that is that I'll be back at Helium in Portland, Oregon on September.
September?
Saturday, December 4th.
Orlando Improv, December 14th.
And the Miami Improv, December 18th.
Those are all going to be Doug Loves Movies tapings.
And yeah, I think we're good we're
three minutes and fifty some seconds over
not bad thank you American Comedy
Company for letting
me do this
thank you to everyone
who came out whether you're from
Lakeside or
Santee and
or any other parts
where are you from, David?
I'm from here in San Diego.
Oh, okay. Well, thanks for making the trip.
I live right up the street.
Appreciate you. One more time for David Sanborn,
Frank Castillo, and
Dan Van Kirk.
And of course, Eddie the Eagle.
As always,
hey,
this might be a good look for me.
Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie.
Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky.
There's no room in his heart for you cause Doug loves movies.