Doug Loves Movies - Guy Branum, Julia Claire, Dominic Monaghan and Dan Van Kirk guest

Episode Date: October 24, 2022

Live from Dynasty Typewriter in Los Angeles, Doug welcomes Guy Branum, Julia Claire, Dominic Monaghan and Dan Van Kirk to the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on Stit...cher Premium. For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 Good morning, Leonard! Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming babies, sticky seeds With 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Cause Doug loves movies! Hey, hey, hey everybody! My is Doug, and I love movies. This is Doug Loves Movies. That was perfection.
Starting point is 00:00:31 Let me open my fancy box that says hashtag without remorse on it because I guess there was a TV show or a TV movie or a streaming movie called About Remorse, and they sent me a bunch of stuff in this cool box and so that's going to be the prize box today. Wait till you find out
Starting point is 00:00:53 what's in there. It's crazy. We're coming to you once again from Dynasty Typewriter in Los Angeles, California! It's Saturday, October 22nd, 2022. And we're continuing our month of scary movie shows here at the Dynasty Typewriter.
Starting point is 00:01:19 And we'll be back on Saturday, November 12th at this same time. And I guess it'll be a thankful episode, maybe. And for our listeners in the Houston area, be sure to check out Doug Loves Movies and Wide World of Dougs. And I'll be doing some other stuff there as well at a festival called the Come and Take It Fest. Yeah, that's November 18 through 20 or something like that.
Starting point is 00:01:48 I'm pretty sure. For all, but if you want to get the accurate information for all of my dates and deets, go to douglovesmovies.com. That's douglovesmovies.com! Yeah! Ka-ka! You didn't get through the whole thing. Everybody just started laughing.
Starting point is 00:02:13 Let's talk about this prize box. Because, of course, I brought a rubber pipe from Peacemaker. It's a nice Halloween-looking one. Yellow and orange. Looks like candy corn. And then I've got from Rockin' Pins as I often do. I've got pins of myself and Doug Loves Movies. And then, because it
Starting point is 00:02:36 fits perfectly in this stupid box, somebody today is going home with carpool karaoke. I don't know who this gentleman is on the cover of this, but apparently carpool karaoke is a microphone that you can use to sing in your car. That doesn't seem safe.
Starting point is 00:03:00 And I heard that you're not allowed to take this into Balthazar. If you're thinking about to take this into Balthazar. If you're thinking about dining in New York City and you want to bring your carpool karaoke, that's why he got thrown out in the first place, because they were tired of all of his restaurant karaoke. But like I said, this crate that it comes in is kind of a prize in and of itself. So especially if you're going over to somebody's house
Starting point is 00:03:25 and you're bringing them a bottle of wine or something, it fits perfectly in there. Oh, it's also a good baby coffin. Almost forgot to mention that. All right, let's see. Did I do everything I needed to do? Yes, I did. Let's get our guests out here. We got four chairs. And if you've been paying attention, I think you already know who's going to be here. Please give it up for Guy Branum, Julia Clare, Dominic Monaghan, and Dan Van Kirk.
Starting point is 00:04:10 Have a seat wherever you'd like. Thank you for being here, everybody. Let's meet all of you. Everybody's so nice and polite. Let's meet everybody alphabetically by first name. The Alice and Rosen rule. Joining us, you know him from Pen Pals and Dumb People Town
Starting point is 00:04:29 and lots of other stuff. It's Dan Van Kirk. Hi, Dan. Hello. Hi, friend. Did you call that a baby coffin? I did. That's bad. Right? I know. It's a terrible thing to say, but it's that time of year.
Starting point is 00:04:45 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's baby coffin season. Yeah. I mean, it's weird. Like, if you don't shop right away during baby coffin season, you get shut out, then you got to put your baby in a regular size coffin. But also, if you wait until after the season, you can get such good deals on baby coffins.
Starting point is 00:05:05 That's true, but it's a roll the dice. Because you don't want to get too big of a coffin for your baby. Rolling around in there. They'll grow into it. No, they won't, Dan. You don't understand how the whole dead baby thing works. All right. Also, are we done talking, Dan? Sure.
Starting point is 00:05:25 Okay. For now. For now. Exactly. You're going to speak again. This isn't the last time you'll speak, but we have our winner from the last time. Applaud if you were here last month for this show. A few people know what's up. Returning to
Starting point is 00:05:41 the program, it's Dominic Monaghan. Welcome. How's it going? How's it going? It's going good. Yeah? I almost forgot to come.
Starting point is 00:05:55 Yeah. That's what I heard. Yeah, it was a weird day today. I was just hanging out watching football and watching UFC. And then my friend Mia was like, are you not doing Doug Love's movies tonight? And I was like, oh, shit. Thank you, Mia.
Starting point is 00:06:12 That's very nice of her. Thank you for hooking that up. And then also on the way over here, I checked your Instagram and I was like, is it happening? And I had no idea that it was actually happening until we parked and I saw Doug Love Movies and I was like, oh, we're in the right place.
Starting point is 00:06:26 Yeah, you did it. It's been like a month since you were here. So much fun last time. Yeah, and I thought you'd want to come back. I love this show. So publicists reached out to each other and then they stopped talking at one point. So that's why you were concerned
Starting point is 00:06:44 about whether it was happening or not, and I was concerned about whether or not you'd be here or not. I have a backup guest in the audience. Oh really? In case you didn't show up. And people like to see Jon Hamm on stage, so. Yeah. Hey Jon.
Starting point is 00:06:57 It's kind of not worked out. No, stay there Jon. The way I had hoped it would. Now we would of course add a chair if he was here, but he's not. Well I also remember the last time that I came here No, we would of course add a chair if he was here, but he's not. Well, I also remember the last time that I came here with Billy, one of the guests showed up really late.
Starting point is 00:07:11 Do you remember? We were on stage and they ran on stage, and I remember turning to Billy and being like, I'll never do that, and almost did it tonight. It's not easy to park around here. So what are you going to do? But thanks for making the effort. So happy to be here.
Starting point is 00:07:26 I kind of love that you both just let the universe decide if this was going to happen. It feels like the 90s. I love it. Yeah, I mean, what are you going to do? I mean, I'd love to have him, but if he doesn't show up, I can't have him. Right?
Starting point is 00:07:43 That's definitely true. But he's here, so let's not talk about him like he's not here okay or in this box also joining us today is another returning champion he won recently on a one of those shows we don't do in front of an audience and so I'm very happy to have him back here again. It's Guy Branum, everybody! So much going on for you right now. If you read the tabloid, not the tabloids, the trades. Yes, the trades are all over me.
Starting point is 00:08:21 They're breathlessly reporting shows that I sold seven months ago. That's great timing. They realize what a movie star you are now. Yes. And they jumped on it. And I'm glad those shows, are those shows still sold? They're still sold. Do they have any life left in them? Who can say?
Starting point is 00:08:34 You'll have to ask the people at NBC and ABC. I mean, if they read the trades, they'll probably be, you know, like, oh, shit, we got to do this thing. It says it in Variety. Hollywood Reporter's making to do this thing it says it in variety holly rip reporters making us do this um but congratulations on bros because uh everybody who has you know gone to the trouble of seeing it uh which is not enough people but the people who have uniformly say that you're terrific in it so fucking funny oh that's so sweet. There you go. Thank you. I think we all as a nation wondered what would happen to Ticket to Paradise
Starting point is 00:09:09 if there were no famous people in it. And so Universal just released Bros just for like an experiment really. For sure. All the quality, some would say even better quality, but none of the same push. Just see what happens. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:09:29 And so, bros, available for video on demand wherever you stream films, because you did not go to the movie theater to see it, but Julia did. That's right. That's right. Joining us for the first time, a perfect guest, is Julia Clare, everybody.
Starting point is 00:09:47 First time on stage. I did the podcast, and I won. You won? I won on the podcast. The Zoom version? The Zoom podcast. And now I'm insulted in front of all these people. Well, I mean, that was probably a case of you still living in New York.
Starting point is 00:10:04 That's true. So I couldn't funnel you into one of these live case of you still living in New York. That's true. So I couldn't funnel you into one of these live ones until you decided to come out here. All right. And now here we are. All right, fine. But I did forget that you won, so I'm sorry about that. I apologize. It's all champions here.
Starting point is 00:10:17 Is it all champions on stage? I think so, yeah. Dan's definitely won in the past. Yeah, I won. It's an all-star game. 2017, I think,'s the last time. The last time I won. Refresh my memory, Julia.
Starting point is 00:10:30 Who did you beat on that one? Because I had some pretty weak contenders. Some don't even play. John Gay Briss was one of them. Wait, what was that noise? It was somewhere between a ooh and a boo. That did sound positive or negative. It was like ooh, but it had the connotation of boo.
Starting point is 00:10:52 Yeah. It was an ooh without the consonant. And I can't remember who else. Yeah, there you go. It doesn't matter. You stepped all over, obviously. You crushed them. You don't need to remember those minions.
Starting point is 00:11:07 No. But yeah, John Gabrus is cool. Love him. Yeah, I think he's done one of these here. Because this is like the fourth or fifth Dynasty Typewriter show that we've been doing monthly. And so thanks again to Dynasty Typewriter. And no thanks to parking in the area. Fuck you, parking in the area.
Starting point is 00:11:31 Guys, there's actually a hack for that, which is that all you have to do is not be able to afford a car. And then you can take the bus, which is what I did. Whoa. Thank you. That's impressive. and then you can take the bus, which is what I did. Whoa! Thank you. That's impressive. L.A. is a walkable city if you're poor enough. This is true.
Starting point is 00:11:53 Six years on that bus. Yeah, you also have to have some time on your hands. But at what cost? Oh, certainly. Certainly, I'm finding out every day. Well, thank you for being here, Julia, and tell us about your podcast. Oh, certainly. Certainly, I'm finding out every day. Well, thank you for being here, Julia. And tell us about your podcast. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:12:09 My podcast is called Reply Guys. It's a leftist feminist podcast with very funny comedians, Kate Willett and Mohana Del Shiki. Hana Del Shiki and and yeah I'm currently on sabbatical from Reply Guys because I'm writing for Crooked Media but I they're doing a great job
Starting point is 00:12:33 and you should still listen to it and I will be back that's awesome I don't think I've ever had someone come on and just promote a podcast that they dipped from you said tell me about your podcast and I was like oh no. I did. It was silly of me to think it was ongoing.
Starting point is 00:12:51 But also I was kind of making a joke because any comedian now if you say tell us about your podcast it's not a bad question. Chances are they have one and then they can tell us about it. I'm actually currently shopping for one if anyone just needs a rogue host.
Starting point is 00:13:09 Well, it is October, and so I do like to lean into the scary movie month, if you will. And so for my recommendation portion of the show today i would like each of you we'll start with you dan okay i'd like each of you to recommend a scary movie or you know a horror movie or a movie that scares you does uh what if it just like gives you like panic attacks like anxiety that doesn't sound like something you'd want to tell somebody else about. But as long as you think
Starting point is 00:13:48 it's not going to cause the same problem in them. Or do you enjoy having anxiety? It's a documentary. It's called The Last Breath. And it is about deep sea divers. And the
Starting point is 00:14:03 way it works is you have to be in a pressurized chamber for like 28 days and then that chamber gets pushed off the side of the boat it's tethered to the boat and then three guys go down and two get outside of the little chamber and they're tethered to the chamber and they go the rest of the way down to the bottom of the ocean
Starting point is 00:14:19 and they're like working on oil rigs or something like that but they are way down there and in the documentary one of them gets left down there. It's an hour and 24 minutes and it is scary. It's scary.
Starting point is 00:14:37 But it's all real and it's amazing. What's it called again? I believe it's called The Last Breath. Has anyone in here seen it? Has anybody? Oh, okay, great. Okay, great. Live to tell about it. Yeah. so what's it called again I believe it's called The Last Breath has anyone in here seen it has anybody oh okay great okay great
Starting point is 00:14:46 live to tell about it yeah but it is like whoa that was fucking spooky and scary and crazy it's wild I mean the documentaries
Starting point is 00:14:56 are scarier than the actual fictional things because they it happened you're seeing it happen do you guys see the documentary about the
Starting point is 00:15:03 the Thai rescue? I haven't watched it, yeah. The boys in Thailand, the soccer team that went into a cave and then it got flooded. That documentary, is it called The Rescue? Yeah, thank you, sir. On the National Geographic channel.
Starting point is 00:15:21 I mean, you should probably avoid it, Dan. That's pretty gut-wrenching. I felt like that during Uncut Gems. I just kept being like, stop. Just stop. I thought you were going to recommend Uncut Gems. Yeah. I had three panic attacks in that movie theater. I just kept going,
Starting point is 00:15:36 stop. Just stop. I do feel like we've slightly lost the thread, though. It's true. It is scary. It's all scary. All right. So that's Dan's horror movie suggestion. I'm going to watch that.
Starting point is 00:15:50 I love documentaries. I'm going to watch it. The Last Breath. You guys should watch Loose Change. I'm just kidding. I'm normal. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:16:02 I'm sorry. Dom, what do you think? Do you have a horror movie you could lay on us? Yeah I do I would just say that not that it necessarily matters but I think horror movies are probably my least favorite genre I like them
Starting point is 00:16:19 When they're good you like them When they're good it's incredible But there's too many that are just rough I think it's the easiest genre to be schlocky in and the easiest genre to just kind of do lowest common denominator bullshit, like let's just throw some bloody guts and stuff. Somebody will be like, where are you going? And then they won't answer and just let them go.
Starting point is 00:16:40 Or like, what did you just see? And then before they answer, it cuts to the other group. And you're like, no, they would tell them that they just, whatever. Yeah. And more cliched stuff than I think a lot of stuff. Like, turn on the fucking light. Call the police, whatever. But there are moments of genius in all genres.
Starting point is 00:16:59 It's like every horror movie now, they have to sit down and have a discussion. How do we explain that these people don't have phones that work? Right. Totally. You know, because phones get us out of so much shit these days.
Starting point is 00:17:11 Stop reading Latin out loud. Yeah. Maybe trade in the Ouija board for a little twister or something. Okay, so did you recommend a movie, Don? I did not. But, yeah, least favorite genre. But in my top five films, there is a horror film,
Starting point is 00:17:33 and it's Let the Right One In, which is an absolute masterpiece. Swedish version. You should watch it in Swedish language with English subtitles. And what I love about that film is it's the story of a little boy that meets a little girl and she just happens to be a vampire that's what I love about it's not it doesn't lead with the front foot of she's a vampire it's scary she drinks your blood she needs blood it's like a little boy kind of you know struggling to find friends finds a friend oh by the
Starting point is 00:18:01 way she's a vampire it is extraordinary yeah he's like, isn't he like blood curious? Yeah, he is curious. Yeah, for sure. He's being bullied and he wants to be violent and he wants to be a tough guy, but he's not. And then the girl kind of,
Starting point is 00:18:14 she kind of teaches him how to be violent and protects him. It's, I think, one of the greatest European films in the last like 20 years or so. That's quite a statement. Yeah. If you guys haven't seen it,
Starting point is 00:18:25 let the right one in. We've had this same conversation already this month with one of my guests that not only recommending Let the Right One In, but also insisting that one, not the American remake.
Starting point is 00:18:36 Who was it? Let's say it was John Gabrus. Okay, good. Boo! No? Nobody? Okay. It was me! But yeah, that's a terrific movie.
Starting point is 00:18:49 Let's go to Guy Branum. Guy, what scares you? I hate horror films. I hate horror films. So do you want me to... What's the one that you find tolerable? Or is there no such thing? I would have to say the best horror film experience I had was reading the screenplay of what turned into the Will Smith I Am Legend.
Starting point is 00:19:13 Not bad. The screenplay that turned into the Will Smith I Am Legend, I had never watched The Omega Man, and after that I watched The Omega Man. And just sort of the idea of living alone in a world full of vampires was this really fun sort of post-apocalyptic thing but then i always think that you know vampires that's sort of scary but like stuff that could actually happen to you is much scarier and just sort of getting to the end of i am legend and having it be like oh shit they're people now and you're the monster. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:19:46 And you don't have a place in this world anymore was really good, and they of course removed that, and Will Smith fixed all the people at the end of the movie. But that's the best take of it. Somebody said that to me once. They were like, you understand in I Am Legend, he's the problem. He kidnaps them, terrorizes them, kills them.
Starting point is 00:20:01 They're trying to stop this thing from kidnapping them in the middle of the night. It's such a better take on it. I legitimately don't remember why I read it, but I read that and I was like, oh, that was a compelling experience, but I hate horror films. Do you not want
Starting point is 00:20:18 to experience a jump scare? For you, I'll just write down, for people to try to read the script, the version of I am legend that they did not make or just go back and read the is it a short story or a novel that it's based on the omega man it's richard matheson just put the omega man because that's a better version of it there you go and it's like that omega man's like uh low-key scary yeah you know it's more of a vibe than uh you know jump scares and all that shit I
Starting point is 00:20:45 hate jump scares yeah can I just ask guy because I wonder if it's that if it's the same thing the reason why I don't like horror films why why do horror films not do it for you um because like they're very not real I don't like the feeling of being of like a jump scare or something like that right or having that sort of tension I mean I like a nice midsummer like that or having that sort of tension. I mean, I like a nice midsummer or the vitch where it's just sort of like, what's this weird situation?
Starting point is 00:21:12 Dude, the vitch is fucking wild. Yeah, the vitch is crazy. Yeah. What about you? It's the same? The vitch is very good. I think for me it's like, the world is a scary place.
Starting point is 00:21:24 Why would I bring that into my living room? I can walk outside at 10 o'clock at night and it's terrifying. Are you recommending that then? Are you recommending late night walk? My street at 10 o'clock? The thing is for some people the scariest thing you can imagine Let the right walk in. For some people the scariest thing you can imagine
Starting point is 00:21:39 is like an undead person's arm slamming through your wall. That's never going to happen. To me the scariest thing that has ever happened in a movie is Meg Ryan driving to Baltimore, hearing Tom Hanks' voice and saying, I have to find that person. He's the only person I'll ever love. That could happen to you.
Starting point is 00:21:58 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, sleepless from all the nightmares. Well played, Doug. All right, Julia, this is a tough one for you because we've got some really interesting... We've got some interesting non-horror films in the mix. I'm so sorry to report that I will add to them because I also am too scared to watch most horror films.
Starting point is 00:22:26 Boy, have I read a lot of good Wikipedia summaries. You know what? I read the Wikipedia summary of Suspiria, the old one and the new one. Whoa. Seems great. Recommend it. Especially the new one. I watched the trailer.
Starting point is 00:22:46 That was really good. I love Dakota Johnson. We stan a woman with a big forehead. But every horror movie I've ever watched has pretty much been against my will because I was in a group where that was the activity and I was not brave enough to leave. But I'll say that I am so scared of horror films
Starting point is 00:23:14 that when I was a teenager, the Scary Movie franchise gave me nightmares. Scary Movie 3, which just had a vague ring theme. I've never seen the ring. I didn't sleep for a week. I don't know how to...
Starting point is 00:23:35 Again, they're comedies. They are comedies, and I couldn't... Anyways. So I don't... This is... I mean, obviously... Should we put Scary Movie 3?
Starting point is 00:23:47 We should put Scary Movie 3. I do love the Wayans brothers. No, the one that I saw most... I think they dipped by part three. Did they? I don't remember. I think they were just in the first two. I blacked it out.
Starting point is 00:24:00 It's a hard series to keep track of. It really is. A lot of moving forward. We had Robert Englund, Freddy Krueger, on the podcast that I do with Billy a few weeks ago. And I was at a convention where Billy and I went over to see if he would do the podcast that we do. And from a distance, I went, hey, Robert.
Starting point is 00:24:16 And he went, hey. And I said, who am I? And I said to Billy, like, we were walking towards him. I went, no, just watch the conversation. I went, we'll do it later. Like, he didn't go high. He went, ugh. And I was like, no.
Starting point is 00:24:27 I wonder if when Robert Englund's walking a dark street at night, if he puts keys between his fingers. And it feels like home. And then just says, yeah, just says Freddy Krueger shit. That's so funny. That's an extraordinary performance by him.
Starting point is 00:24:42 I mean, he gave me legit nightmares for like a decade. I come from like a family of people who love horror films. So this is, I mean, my personal Waterloo. But yeah, so growing up, my parents would always be like, you have to watch this film. It's a classic. And then I would be awake for a week. And I know that everyone, like the old horror movies,
Starting point is 00:25:13 people are like, those aren't scary because the effects are so bad. Doesn't matter to my little pea brain. Invasion of the Body Snatchers, the old one, so fucking scary. Okay. No, no, she means even older. The black and white one. Oh, right. With Kevin McCarthy, I think.
Starting point is 00:25:30 Doug gets the point. Doug gets the point. Thank you. The birds? The birds? Are you kidding me? I literally thought you were going to say the burbs. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:40 That's scary, too. That's a scary comedy. Have you seen the burbs? I bet it would scare you. It will scare you. Just so you know. When I was seven, I was supposed to be in bed
Starting point is 00:25:48 and I got up and went into the living room where my parents were watching the TV movie of Salem's Lot. And a vampire popped up through the floor and I am still fucked up by that. I am still processing that and when I'm done with that, I'll go watch a Friday through the 13th.
Starting point is 00:26:07 There's an entire generation that just blames Tim Curry for what happened to them from it. Oh, yeah. But what I will say is I did recently go see one in a theater. I went to see Bodies, Bodies, Bodies. Did anybody see that?
Starting point is 00:26:21 It's not super scary. My friend Rachel's in it. I wanted to support. So I went. I thought it was so funny. And so I thought it was like the perfect mixture of like comedy and horror that didn't, you know, wasn't as scary as Scary Movie 3. Like Zombieland does that really well. A little bit of fear with a little bit of comedy.
Starting point is 00:26:42 The Final Girl or The Last Girl. That one was really good, right? Final girls. Final girls, yeah. Finals girl. Julia, do you have like a take as to why you think ladies tend to like horror films more than men? From my understanding, like in my kind of group of friends, all my girlfriends love horror films and most of my guy friends are like,
Starting point is 00:27:06 eh, it's not my thing. I didn't know that that was a phenomenon. Maybe it's just my friends. True crime, it tends to be. True crime for sure. True crime because it's the only medium that's dedicated specifically to us. America loves a dead woman.
Starting point is 00:27:23 Boy, do we love a dead woman. And a dead girl? She can't talk anymore. That's great. Hey, Dan, do you know why I didn't see the It movies in the theater? How come? Because I'm Pennywise. Hey-o.
Starting point is 00:27:39 Hey-o. Hey-o. Well, these are terrific. I'm switching yours to bodies, bodies, bodies. Yes. Because it truly does have scary parts. It's really good to Bodies, Bodies, Bodies. Yes. Because it truly does have scary parts. It's really good. And it's funny.
Starting point is 00:27:48 It's funny. And it's got one of the better endings of a horror movie I've ever seen. That's true. It's really good. Yeah. There's a lot of, you know, again, like Dom was saying, there's stuff in it that I wish wasn't there that just has to be in horror movies. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:00 You know, like walking around with a flashlight for ten minutes. Like, okay, let's go, you know. And you can't, you know, they should have one person in the audience at the theater to fast-forward to those Preferably a man okay, so Give the man the remote control Well, we have a lot to do right now because we've got to decide who my guests are gonna play for today to win this amazing BC. Oh, geez.
Starting point is 00:28:32 Yeah, I didn't want to say it again. I was like, there's no reason to keep saying baby coffin. But somebody's going to win this and take it off my hands because, frankly, it's cursed me since the day I got it. It's under some sort of spell. So we'll pick those during the break and then we'll come back and we'll play some games. We'll be right back. We're back
Starting point is 00:28:56 everybody! We're doing it on a Saturday afternoon in Los Angeles. The coldest day of the year here. Really? So far, yeah. We hit it like our high today was like 69 or 70. And you know how sexy I think the number 70 is.
Starting point is 00:29:17 Yeah. I love it. I'm wearing a light jacket for the first time. I'm just fucking living. Absolutely living. Okay, so this first game we're going to play today is one I enjoy very much because I'm a big fan of Nicolas Cage
Starting point is 00:29:34 and the motion picture pig. This game is called Knock Over Those Bottles. We have a lead. This game is called Who Has My Pig? Here's how this game works. In the motion picture pig, Nicolas Cage was very upset that his pig was missing and he spends the whole movie
Starting point is 00:29:55 trying to find his pig. Is that real? I won't give away whether he does or not. Yeah. Okay. You haven't seen this movie? No. Me either. It sounds like a weird version of John Wick. Yeah, it's really weird. Animal Vendetta. Yeah, because he's also a chef who lives out in the woods.
Starting point is 00:30:13 Okay, stop. I'm already in. So Nicolas Cage is trying to find his pig. So I do my impression, my bad impression of Nicolas Cage. And the four of you all guess who Nicholas Cage thinks has his pig. I'll give you clues in what I'm saying
Starting point is 00:30:33 and you can guess as often as you want. Love it. Just yell it into your microphone. And this is an actor? I'll stop when someone gets it right. Thank you for asking. Since it's October I decided to make it More specific this one
Starting point is 00:30:50 Than actors and actresses So instead it's movie characters Okay So you're going to guess the movie character That Nicolas Cage thinks Has something to do With the disappearance of his pig. Okay.
Starting point is 00:31:06 And I gotta commend Dynasty Typewriter for having an open snack bar during the show. Mm-hmm, sure. That's one of my pet peeves when you're watching like a boring movie
Starting point is 00:31:14 and you run up to the snack bar and it's closed because they're not expecting any business during the movie. It's like, but it's gonna happen so just have a guy
Starting point is 00:31:22 sitting there. Also, their popcorn is excellent. It is excellent. It is excellent. It's good popcorn. It's like extra salty. Yeah, and they put different candies in it. Ooh.
Starting point is 00:31:31 They're not fucking around with the snacks here at Dynasty Typewriter. The drinks are great, too. They got root beer. They got grape soda. They got lots of great stuff. So come to Dynasty Typewriter. Just enjoy the snack bar and then leave. I don't know anything about the shows they do here.
Starting point is 00:31:49 I just know the snack bar is solid. All right. I've got to switch into Nicolas Cage mode. Is everybody ready? Sure. Good start. We're already in Nicolas Cage mode. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:03 All right. Here goes. Did he really just drop that pen again? I drop this pen every week, and then I spend too long trying to get it back. This is why you ought to be here for those moments. Right? That's why you want to see the show live,
Starting point is 00:32:17 because the listeners... This doesn't happen on Zoom. The listeners aren't seeing me. Yeah, exactly. All right, here we go. This is Nicolas Cage. You tell me who he thinks has his pig. Do you have my pig?
Starting point is 00:32:33 I start everyone with something like that. There's no reason to guess yet. Alright. Do you have my pig? Are you hiding my pig behind your creepy hotel? Norman Bates. Dan got it.
Starting point is 00:32:54 Do I have to come over to the Universal back lot and look for myself? Or is your mother going to be there with a knife? So Dan gets the first point and now it's time for round two. Okay. Do you have my pig, doctor? I mean, I'm not talking about a pig, doctor.
Starting point is 00:33:23 You're the doctor. I know you prefer to eat people. Cannibal actor. Yeah, Dan did it again. Holy shit, Dan. I was going to say Richard Kimball. Dan, it's almost like you're on stage with a bunch of people who don't like horror movies.
Starting point is 00:33:39 I watched two horror movies this week. Is Patch Adams a horror film? Yes. That counts. That's canon. I was, because that's where I was going. Yeah. That movie is a little scary.
Starting point is 00:33:54 Okay. So Dan is just running away with this thing, but it's still, what's that? He regrets it. He instantly regrets it. Whatever he said, he was like, I didn't know that it would be... That was a fast take back. I love that. I want you to let that take back
Starting point is 00:34:13 stay with you forever. It's really important. It's been recorded. That moment where Heckler decided to retract. Nope. Immediately after. Appreciate it. Good job. where heckler decided to retract just the emergency immediately after yeah good job did you eat my pig my pig isn't much of a swimmer. Oh, Jaws.
Starting point is 00:34:45 Yay! Nice! I was going in another direction, and I won't say it in case it comes up. Thinking outside the box, though. I love Jaws because that movie is where, like, the horror is actually small-town bureaucracy. It's the mayor.
Starting point is 00:35:04 The mayor is the villain, not the shark. Politicians are the problem. And he's still the mayor in Jaws 2. Like he's been proven absolutely wrong in his attitude and his decision. And you know why? That's why everyone needs to vote. Vote out this terrible mayor we have
Starting point is 00:35:25 in Amity. I was going to go on to say, can I call you Bruce? Alright. And universal backlog. Jaws is too informal. Alright. So, Dan's the winner of that game.
Starting point is 00:35:42 Congratulations, Dan. The guy was a strong runner-up. And this last one's just for fun. I still like to do one more, because I wrote it down. And I practiced it. Are you all ready? Yeah. Do you have my pig, Dracula?
Starting point is 00:36:03 Bram Stoker's Dracula. I'll take it, but I was just looking for Dracula. You never know with you, full name. But wait, if someone's saying, do you have my pig, Dracula, why would Dracula be saying, do you have my pig, to himself? Nicolas Cage said to Dracula. Copy that. Do you have my pig?
Starting point is 00:36:21 Moving on. That gets back on board. And I got the stairs I was looking for because that's a fun thing I do on the last one. The listeners know. On the last one, every time, I just say the answer at the end of the sentence and see how quickly people pick up on it.
Starting point is 00:36:37 And Dan was the people that picked up on that the quickest. But Dan was already our winner of this game, which means he gets to go first in our next game. No, it should mean he has to sit out the next game. Okay, Dan, you have to sit this one out. It's the new Julia Clare rule. I might have spaced out. Did we ever say who we're playing for?
Starting point is 00:36:59 Do we have to anymore? We didn't say it out loud, but that's not a bad idea to bring it up. I didn't know. I was like, maybe everybody else did. And I just went away for a second. Dan is playing for
Starting point is 00:37:11 Dr. Strange Jess or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bob. Yeah. Yes. Dom is playing for Flaxenship Down
Starting point is 00:37:26 because Holly Flax from The Office is in the audience. Laws of Afflaction? Mm-hmm. Flaxen Jackson. Yes. Flaxen Jackson
Starting point is 00:37:38 is a good one. So I married a flax murderer. There. That. Stop. Just move on. We're done. Stop. Just move on. We're done.
Starting point is 00:37:46 You can end the show. Okay. That was fun. That was a fun short one. All right. And then Julia, oh, sorry, Guy is playing for Return of the Kim, which is another Lord of the Rings thing.
Starting point is 00:38:05 I just want to say that as flax is a traditionally Ashkenazi Jewish last name. So I married a flax murderer would probably be like a very, very long Holocaust documentary. Also with Doug, like the next episode, he'd be like, so we have a new game. You're going to take the word flax and I'm going to give you a title. I don't think that will happen. Okay. But this is going to happen. I was so excited about the first two guests booked on this particular episode were Dominic.
Starting point is 00:38:41 Wait, we didn't say who she's playing. Oh, right, right. were Dominic and... Wait, we didn't say who she's playing. Oh, right, right. Julius played for, instead of Inherent Vice, he went with Inherent Ryan. I mean, I chose it because I love when someone really just phones it in.
Starting point is 00:38:57 Yeah. And I think it's important. It was either that or I know what you did last Ryan. So, and you can really do that with almost any movie. No, it is fun to just throw a name in there. And like, why worry about trying to make some sort of pun? Just put it in there and see what happens. Ryan, Private Ryan.
Starting point is 00:39:20 Yeah. Or you could have done like an homage to Jules. Ryan. Yeah, Ryan's. There is a movie called Ryan's Daughter. You could do Ryan's Daughter Ryan. Rye-am-Sam. Oh, I like that too.
Starting point is 00:39:41 I am Sam. If you want to have a laugh, that'll make you feel bad about yourself. When Sean Penn is running down the hall with that cake, it's the most obvious what's going to happen moment in the history of cinema. Give the mentally handicapped guy a cake and tell him to run.
Starting point is 00:40:08 And then that's one of those movies where there's a mix of actors who are genuinely mentally handicapped interacting with men pretending to be. It's so rough. A double bill with Patch Adams. Would be terrific. I mean, one of the last movies
Starting point is 00:40:26 that Gene Siskel reviewed was Patch Adams and he hated it and then died of cancer. Which proves Patch Adams didn't heal anybody. Have you guys seen the movie where, I think it's Rosie O'Donnell plays someone who has... Riding on the bus with my sister, yes. That is a rough watch. we owe each other a coke yeah that's tough too
Starting point is 00:40:51 hopefully that's just a thing of the past the wild swing at playing somebody that's severely disabled that's past and we've entered the golden age of prestige fat suits ladies and gentlemen you won an academy award you spent four hours That's passed and we've entered the golden age of prestige fat suits, ladies and gentlemen. You won an Academy Award.
Starting point is 00:41:10 You spent four hours in prosthetics to look kind of like me. It is insane the amount of time they spend in the makeup chair each day to just look like a thing they could have made with CGI. Or cast. Yeah. I mean, they could have just really gone crazy. Just make him 8,000 pounds. Make him like the size of an entire city.
Starting point is 00:41:30 Be like, have you seen the whale? Yeah. Tried to drive through that place and he blocked it. Okay. So, the game we're
Starting point is 00:41:43 going to play. Oh, so. Yeah. Did I forget anything else, Dan? No, we're great. Okay. Yep. Moving on. Okay we're going to play. Oh, so did I forget anything else, Dan? No, we're great. Okay, moving on. Okay, and back to one, back to one. Here we go. Since Dan Van Kirk and Dominic Mana...
Starting point is 00:41:58 He got it wrong last time, that's why I said it. Yeah, are the first two guests booked, so I came up with a game in honor of the two of you, and it's called Van Damme or Dom. Ooh. This is a game where you have to know as much as possible about Jean-Claude Van Damme
Starting point is 00:42:21 and Dom DeLuise. Oh no. Every fun fact that I share with you is either about Jean-Claude Van Damme or Dom DeLuise or both. Wow. Yeah. Outside of the whole game stuff,
Starting point is 00:42:44 could you just let me know because I don't even know who Dom DeLuise is could you tell me a movie or Dom before we had fat suits we had actual funny fat guys and Dom DeLuise did a shit ton of coke with Burt Reynolds in the 70s
Starting point is 00:42:59 and they filmed some of them and they released them as films your cannonball run your cannonball run 2 got it what else was he in and they filmed some of them and they released them as films. Your Cannonball Run. Your Cannonball Run 2. Got it. What else was here? That just became a mainstay of our culture. Mel Brooks movies. When you show up on The Tonight Show.
Starting point is 00:43:14 Got it. I know that. Yeah, he's in lots of movies directed by Mel Brooks and Gene Wilder. He worked with both of them a lot. He's flabbergasted a lot. He's no longer with us, but I assume he's in heaven
Starting point is 00:43:26 because he's a voice in All Dogs Go to Heaven. Cats go to hell. Okay, so... So we'll start with the winner of that last game, who is in fact Dan Van Kirk. And then we'll go to Guy, because he came in second. And then Julia. And then Dom.
Starting point is 00:43:49 So Dom, on this first one, you probably won't get to play. Fine. We'll see. Because Dan's going to guess. If he gets it wrong, then Guy gets to guess between the two remaining answers. And if Guy gets it wrong and Julia gets the gimme point, uh we'll see how it works uh this first one is
Starting point is 00:44:14 dan van kirk van dam or dom or both okay uses a stage name A stage name. I'm going to go both. You're saying both of them have all or partly made up names. Yes. Incorrect. We move to Guy. I guess you wouldn't choose Claude. Nothing against it.
Starting point is 00:44:49 I just don't really choose it. All right. So the two options here. What a Claude. Our options are that Jean-Claude Van Damme had a much more fruity Belgian name. I'm allowed to use these words. Say anything you want about Belgians.
Starting point is 00:45:10 And then, Dom DeLuise had an infinitely more Italian name that he changed it from. I'm going to say Jean-Claude Van Damme changed his name. That is correct! That's well played. Yeah, his real name is Jean-Claude Camille...
Starting point is 00:45:29 What did I say? Francois. He's one of those two middle names. That's how fancy he is. And then his real last name is Van Varenberg. So he was like, damn! I gotta change that up yeah Camille whereas Dom DeLuise if you're born if you're if your Christian name is Dom DeLuise you just have to be an actor you have to be in showbiz you have to be a
Starting point is 00:46:04 star and you have to do coke with Burr Reynolds. He's the full Dominic with a K. Oh, he has a K. He goes all the way to the K. He has a K. I get Dominique a lot in this country. Like if I go to places, doctor's offices where they're checking me in and stuff,
Starting point is 00:46:22 it's like Dominique. And I'm like, no, no. No, no, eventually that'll be my name. But for now, I'm a name. Dominique, and I'm like, no, no. No, no, eventually that'll be my name, but for now I'm a name. Dominique, I think is like a girl's name. I think it's because of Dominique Wilkins. Yeah, but still, it's got a Q. It's got a Q-U-E, right?
Starting point is 00:46:35 Yeah. Sometimes I'll get Danielle, and I'm like, do you just not know how to read? I would say 50% of the time when someone doesn't know my name, they call me Dominique, and I'm like, oh, that's weird. Your name is, first and last, is a total minefield. It's a fucking minefield, yeah, it really is. It's really terrible.
Starting point is 00:46:53 I just want to say, if you switch vowels on my first name, it is hate-criming me, and it happens constantly. Really? Oh, yes. I mean, like Starbucks, people just go, gay? Sure. If you've got to make a big deal about it, then grab your coffee. Okay, here we go.
Starting point is 00:47:14 Where am I? Dynasty typewriter. Okay, so Julia, you're up first. Okay. Because Guy just got the point. Okay. All right. Julia, Van Damme, DeLuise, or both,
Starting point is 00:47:35 has voiced an animated crocodile. Fuck. And just before you get into it Lyle is voiced by Shawn Mendes or some shit like that so don't worry about Lyle Lyle now I'm wondering I'm wondering about the crocodile
Starting point is 00:48:02 and Peter Pan does it speak? Who am I? I'm going to say it voiced a crocodile. We all know the French are villains. I'm going to say Dom DeLuise. Ooh, I'm sorry. Dom Deluise ooh I'm sorry that's incorrect speaking of Dom yeah
Starting point is 00:48:32 so you have the options are both of them or just Van Damme so Van Damme voiced Puss in Boots no he didn't Van Damme. So Van Damme voiced Puss in Boots.
Starting point is 00:48:46 No, he didn't. I think he got an extraordinary amount of money for that. It's one of the biggest paydays in animation history. It was like a $60 million payout. That's Antonio Banderas you're thinking of, though, right? You're correct. Doug, second point. I keep getting points.
Starting point is 00:49:06 Where do I write them? Yeah, duck me a point. I don't got any room for it. I think... I'm gonna go both. You're going both? Let me look. Nope. Well, look at you sitting over there.
Starting point is 00:49:27 Dan? Yeah, except for I forgot what Julius said. Oh, perfect. This is perfect. I wish I was doing this as a bit to be funny, but I'm genuinely not. It's really hard sometimes. Keep in mind, he is the runaway winner.
Starting point is 00:49:42 In Doug Love's movies, it's all about the fundamentals, you guys. It's about playing the game on the court. It is. I get it. It is hard sometimes to pay attention when a woman's talking. No, I get all caught up in the fun. Wait, what'd you say, Julie? Sarah, that's not true.
Starting point is 00:50:06 What did you say? Don't tell me, because I have to lose. I swear to God, I don't know why. If you don't get it, then nobody's going to get the point. Why? He gets it, yeah. Yes! Yes! Because I could just tell you which one's left over. You have no idea how much, in real life,
Starting point is 00:50:24 I'm embarrassed of myself. Which one do you think is left over? You know what? It's 50-50. Yeah. I'll say Jean-Claude Van Damme. Yeah, that's correct. Everyone in the room but you knew the answer.
Starting point is 00:50:46 I know. I genuinely feel bad. And it's like, who did he play? What kind of guy? He's a crocodile in the Kung Fu Panda movies. Oh, is that right? Guy Blatt, right? Yeah. He's like a crocodile that can do karate.
Starting point is 00:51:01 I heard he did his own stunts. All of the O's during splits. Alright, so Daniel... Antonio Banderas made a huge amount of money playing the piano. Oh, that's what I heard. I've heard that. I've heard that. And, you know, Jean-Claude Van Damme was also Pedro Almodovar's
Starting point is 00:51:20 muse in the 80s, so I understand why you're confused. Thank you, guys. Thank you. Okay, guys I understand why you're confused. Thank you, Guy. Okay, Guy's up first on this next one. Van Damme, Dom DeLuise, or both, his father was a garbage man.
Starting point is 00:51:40 Not a garbage man. A garbage man. Okay. He wasn't a piece of shit. I'm going to say, all right, we're still looking for a both, but I'm just going to say Dom DeLuise. No, I'm sorry. Julia.
Starting point is 00:52:05 Wow. Dom is off the table. So is it Van Damme or both? Whose father was a garbage man? If it's both of them, that's... What mysteries exist in the world? I don't know of course my first instinct
Starting point is 00:52:28 was also Dom DeLuise because I'm deeply anti-Italian we understand that government jobs are something that a mob hands out to their community to maintain authority okay we are racists right but
Starting point is 00:52:42 alright I'll say Van Damme We are racists. Right. But, all right, I'll say Van Damme. That is correct. Yeah. In Belgium. Yeah. Is that right? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:00 Belgian garbage is mostly just cigarette butts and like muscle shells. All right. Which is interesting, because Jean-Claude was known for his muscles and butt. Yeah. Well played.
Starting point is 00:53:20 Good work. Don't applaud that. Points, points. Do not applaud that. I'm furious. Guy kind of gave it. You't applaud that. Points, points. Do not applaud that. I'm furious. You gave me that. That was very good writing from an actor. No one wants to see you do that.
Starting point is 00:53:37 You're up first on this next one, Dom. Oh, cool. Right, because Julia just got the point. And here we go. Has won a Razzie award? Van Damme, Dom, or both? You've never messed around with Razzies, have you? I'm not sure. Possibly.
Starting point is 00:54:05 Somebody would tell you. Your best friend would tell you if you got a nomination. Do you get informed? Somebody who loves you would tell you. I feel like Jean-Claude Van Damme has. I'm not sure if even Dom DeLuise was in the conversation at that point. I'll say Jean-Claude Van Damme. I love this part. conversation at that point, I'll say Jean-Claude Van Damme.
Starting point is 00:54:29 Hmm. I love this part. Incorrect. Dan, let me recap. Okay. He just said Van Damme. Dude, it's all I've been saying in my head since he spoke. I'll go both. That is correct.
Starting point is 00:54:51 It is both. Do you know which films? Yeah, Van Damme won along with his co-star Dennis Rodman for worst movie team in double team. Yep. worst movie team in double team. And then DeLuise won
Starting point is 00:55:10 for he won for in the lady category because he played a drag character. Yeah, he won a Razzie for playing Aunt Kate in Haunted Honeymoon. Oh, that was so great, though. Ball in the Jack?
Starting point is 00:55:29 It was a great dance sequence with Gilda Ragnar. Yeah. How dare they? Well, you know, the Razzies, they give them to things that are kind of thought of as bad, but also are mainstream. They don't just pick stuff nobody saw and then attack it. They go after the classics like Haunted Honeymoon.
Starting point is 00:55:48 Didn't they recently had to renege on a whole bunch of Bruce Willis nominations? Is that right? Is that what happened? Cowards. It's kind of tricky. They nominated Bruce Willis for a whole bunch of stuff and then it came out that he was struggling with stuff and they were like nah, we didn't mean that.
Starting point is 00:56:04 I love the Razzies. I think that they're so much fun. I hope that they never stop. I love when people show up. Oh, Halle Berry, Sharon Stone. Yeah, they show up with their own red carpets. Incredible. Wouldn't you?
Starting point is 00:56:17 I would do that. Totally. If I got nominated, I would absolutely blow it up. I would be like, oh my god, yes. Yeah, and if you got nominated and went to the thing, you'd be disappointed to lose that. If you were actually there, you know. That's why a lot of award shows
Starting point is 00:56:32 you know who the winner's going to be because it's the person who's actually there. You've seen them on camera and then they win and act surprised. Alright, so what have we got here? I think Dan won that one too. I got lucky, yeah. Yeah? I think Dan won that one too. I got lucky. Yeah, I think you did.
Starting point is 00:56:48 But here was the extra question if we needed it. Married more than once. Oh. And it would be me and it would be both. And how many points did he hide? Because I had one point and could I tie the whole thing up right now? I don't know. I'm going to say both.
Starting point is 00:57:02 Should I not tie the whole thing up right now? No, because it was over. Okay. Because Dan got two points in this game. Was it both, though? What? Van Damme. It's just Van Damme.
Starting point is 00:57:17 Oh. Dom DeLuise was married to the same woman. Oh, he's Italian. He's Italian. For most of his life. An actress who's also in a lot of the movies he's in. Her name is Carol Arthur. Still is.
Starting point is 00:57:27 I think she's alive. But Van Damme's been married four times. And I think, if I understand it from reading the Wikipedia, one of them was twice. That's the best. I think he's been married like five times. He's a Liz Taylor. Five times to four women.
Starting point is 00:57:43 Did Elizabeth Taylor marry the same person twice or three times Richard Burton twice yeah she doubled back on Burton and who wouldn't yeah
Starting point is 00:57:50 well alright so still anybody's game today of course not really of course it is because Dan gets to go first in this next game
Starting point is 00:58:03 it might not even be advantageous to go first in fact next game. It might not even be advantageous to go first. In fact, probably not. We'll see right after these messages. And we're back. We've got one more game to play, and it's one that I'm very excited about because it's kind of a twist on an old game,
Starting point is 00:58:31 and I've tried it once, and I'm still tweaking it, and it's called Super IMDB. You know the website IMDB? Yes. IMDB, too, as well, but there's a website that is called that, and they just keep track
Starting point is 00:58:50 of, you know, everything that's going on in the world of movies and in their own algorithm. Because, as you know, Dom, if you go to IMDB on your page, it'll say best known for or most known for,
Starting point is 00:59:09 and then they list four movies at the top. So yours is, you know, three Lord of the Rings movies. Yeah, terrible. And then the fourth thing is, because they do TV as well, the fourth thing is probably Lost. Probably, yeah. Yeah, yeah. So that's how it shakes out, is it's mostly movies,
Starting point is 00:59:29 but sometimes there's TV. So I'm going to tell you the name of an actor or actress, and then you're going to take turns naming movies that you hope are in their top four. All right. And for every one you get, you get a point. And if you guess something that's not on the top four there's no penalty
Starting point is 00:59:47 but we'll go around individually getting your answers can we include a TV show or not? you can, yeah, if you think a TV show might be in there, go for it and there'll also be like some at the end of the day, does Doug love TV? Doug does love TV
Starting point is 01:00:04 okay, then I'll accept it yeah, and in some ways At the end of the day, does Doug love TV? Doug does love TV. Okay, then I'll accept it. Yeah, and in some ways more than movies because they're doing such good work on TV now. Really are. It used to be such a stigma for anybody that's in movies to do TV, and now they're all doing TV. That's why we're seeing Michael Keaton win an award at every award show because he did a TV show.
Starting point is 01:00:24 I'm waiting for Leo to do a TV show and then it's over. Once DiCaprio does a TV show, it's over. Leo. Everyone does a TV show. Season three of The White Lotus. That'd be great. Leo or Cate Blanchett. Has Cate Blanchett done a TV show yet?
Starting point is 01:00:41 No, I don't think so, right? Yeah. Oh, who? What? Which one? What TV show? Yeah, take it back like that other guy did. Stateland.
Starting point is 01:00:51 I mean, at the end of the day, Tar was six half hours. She was in Mrs. America, I think it was. Oh, yeah. An FX show, no less. Yeah. Wow. So she did do it.
Starting point is 01:01:03 All right. But you know how it is. No more answers from the audience, because this is going to get intense, and someone's going home with this box, whether they want it or not. That's another thing I didn't ask when we were picking name tags,
Starting point is 01:01:19 is if you even want this box. You know, it's like Julia wouldn't want it, because it's a weird thing to take on the bus. Yeah. Yeah, but I'd be like in the bottom five weirdest people on the bus. Why has that lady got a baby coffin
Starting point is 01:01:39 in her lap? I hope it's empty. Okay. So, I think I was finished describing how this works. So, Dan gets to go first, and we'll switch the old order around. We'll go
Starting point is 01:01:55 Dan, and then Dom, and then Julia, and Guy. And in each round, you each get one guess, and once we've hit all four, we'll move on. Or we might not get all four, which is a possibility. Okay, so Dan, you start us off. Okay.
Starting point is 01:02:15 Name one movie that you think is in the best known for of an actress named Jamie Lee Curtis? I'm going to go with Knives Out. You're going to say Knives Out as your first attempt to get a point, and you failed. Okay. Knives Out. Knives Out. Knives Out didn't make her top four somehow. You can choose them.
Starting point is 01:02:44 Dom, what do you think? Yeah, some actors can do IMDb Pro and have their representatives or themselves go in and set it up. Yeah. But Dom, you haven't done that. You just rolled the dice. And the photo of me on IMDb is fucking shocking me.
Starting point is 01:02:57 It is. It's fucking awful. What? The photo of me on IMDb is fucking awful. Oh, it's kind of weird, right? It's just not complimentary in any way. You can change it. I can change it?
Starting point is 01:03:09 Yeah. I had no idea. You have to pay like 35 bucks a year or something. Oh, fuck that. Someone on your team has pro. They have to. Yeah, maybe. I typed Dom and some guy named Dom Bergeron popped up.
Starting point is 01:03:21 Love Dom Bergeron. He's the top Dom? What the fuck? This doesn't seem right. Alright, so who? I'm going to say you said Jamie Lucas, right? I'll say
Starting point is 01:03:37 Halloween. Really? Really? Interesting guess. Thank you. Dominic. Dominic West? What's with these other Dominics?
Starting point is 01:03:52 It's actually Dominique West. Ah, there you go. Fuck him. Oh my God, I wish... Confirm how terrible that picture is. That's a pretty boy right there. Let me see, let me see. No, that's not nice to Dom to say that.
Starting point is 01:04:09 I don't, I mean. It just doesn't look like you. Right, right, thank you, Julian. I think it looks real hot. You look like there's a guy on the new season of Love is Blind that looks like that. They only pick those people on hotness, so. And I didn't look at this ahead of time
Starting point is 01:04:26 But your top four are the three Lord of the Rings movies and Lost Good for you I figured that out I'm getting so many points today Okay so you said Halloween Just Halloween the word Halloween That's your answer
Starting point is 01:04:41 Well it turns out she's in two movies Called Halloween so you are correct. Yes. Her number two points. The number one movie on her top four is
Starting point is 01:04:52 A Fish Called Wonder. The Halloween that's more recent. Oh really? Halloween Ends. Not the original the 2018 Halloween. It was like the highest
Starting point is 01:05:00 Oh not Halloween Ends. Yes. Another Halloween. Supposedly the new Halloween is absolutely shocking. Really? Yeah Halloween Ends. Another Halloween. Supposedly the new Halloween is absolutely shocking. Really? Yeah, Halloween Ends. It's really, what do you call it, polarizing.
Starting point is 01:05:11 People either hate it or they really hate it. Did you see it, Doug? Did you see it? No, I haven't seen it. I still got to catch up with Halloween Ends, which is, or wait, Kills. Halloween Kills, then Ends. All right. Julia, which is, or wait, kills. Halloween kills, then ends. All right. Julia, Dom is on the board.
Starting point is 01:05:29 He's got one for Halloween, but that leaves three Jamie Lee Curtis movies that are ripe for the big time. I thought that was two. Oh, never mind. It's just one title called Halloween. Gotcha. I'm only going to give the one point for that. Because it was also extra easy to have guessed Halloween. Because you had two chances at it.
Starting point is 01:05:49 What do you think, Julia? Oh, fuck. I don't know why, but I do want to say, and I've never even seen this movie, but I do want to say A Fish Called Wanda. Because I feel like that is the movie that put her on the map. Well, I would agree with you that that was big for her, but did not make her top four. Fucking leave it.
Starting point is 01:06:11 Okay. I would have assumed that it would have been just all of those Halloween movies, but I now assume that you would not have been tossing around the words Halloween kills and Halloween ends if they were potential answers. So I am going to go with True Lies.
Starting point is 01:06:27 Damn it. Facts. That is the correct answer. Nice, guys. That's number two. Well played, Sid. So Guy is on the board, and that means we're back to Dan. and that means we're back to Dan.
Starting point is 01:06:46 So we know that someone on her team is putting new movies in there. So I'm going to, along with that logic, I'll go with Everything Everywhere All at Once. I mean, that's as new as it gets. That's brand spanking new. April came out. And I think she might get an Academy Award. She's wonderful. Incredible wonderful how terrible would it be if the white person
Starting point is 01:07:08 won the Academy Award from that movie if she wins and Michelle Yeoh loses we're gonna get some articles I really hope Kikwan gets nominated as well absolutely as somebody who has seen both Tar and The Fablemans
Starting point is 01:07:24 I have to say it is Michelle Yeoh's year. She's taking it down. Yeah, sure. So good. I hope you're right. I hope you're right. But that's the problem is that they just, you know, the Academy likes to give awards to people who already have them.
Starting point is 01:07:39 Because Michelle Williams has already won, but everybody's talking about her for Fablemans like she's locked. Williamson's already won, but everybody's talking about her for Fableman's like she's locked. I thought the movie should have been called We Make Up Storymans. But they went with something way more subtle.
Starting point is 01:07:56 I'm a writer. Oh yeah? What's your name? Fableman. Fuck you. What the fuck are you talking about? That's like if you were a library detective and your name was Bookman. Okay, so... Everything Everywhere All Once did not make the list.
Starting point is 01:08:14 I'm sad to say. But it might someday. Dom? I have a face full of popcorn. Gotta finish chewing. Man. Okay. Trading Places.
Starting point is 01:08:30 Oh, great answer. Great call. Great call. Number four. It's on the list. Okay. She gets her boobies out in Trading Places. That's the rumor.
Starting point is 01:08:42 Yeah. She has lovely boobies. Yeah. It really... It was back in the vhs days and i remember doing the rewind festival pause remind festival pause i'm gonna add that to your imdb you got i mean i'm sure you guys remember maybe julia too but like in vhs days even when you paused it it would jitter in the d DVD days, it sticks, but in the VHS days, you had to get off to something that was going... There's a scene in A Room With A View
Starting point is 01:09:10 where Simon Callow and Rupert Graves and Julian Sands show Full Wiener and Frolic in a pond, and I know what you're talking about. But it was back in VHS days, guys, where it's going... Yes, yes. You're like, hold still! It's too jerky for me to jerk it! All right.
Starting point is 01:09:35 Okay, so one title, one title remains out of all of Jamie Lee Curtis's stuff. It's Julia's turn. What do you think, Julia? Wow. Anything? There was a sort of sequel to Fish Call Wanda. It's not on the list.
Starting point is 01:10:02 No, it's not. It was called Fierce Creatures and it was bad. Yeah, but like with the same four main cast members of Wanda playing different characters. Like, oh, we want to see them again, but don't do that thing you did already. We don't like those characters that much. I guess Kevin Kline dies in Spoiler.
Starting point is 01:10:23 I usually am good at this, and I have such a blind spot for Jamie Lee Curtis. This is embarrassing. Can you give us a clue, Doug? Or give Julia a clue? Well, she was an actress who disappeared in 100 movies. I know. Was she in Clue?
Starting point is 01:10:42 No. No. No, she wasn't. No. But that's Clue? No. No. No, she wasn't. No. But that's not how this works. You can't just say, what's she in each time. Guy? My guts at Scream Queens.
Starting point is 01:10:57 Oh, the TV program, the Ryan Murphy thing? Oh, fuck. Yeah, yeah. Not on there. Dan? Freaky Friday? No. No. No.
Starting point is 01:11:09 Damn. That's what I was gonna say. But she and Lindsay Lohan are on the record saying they will make a remake or a sequel or whatever. Yeah, there's no other day of the week that would sound good. Freaky Monday. Freaky Monday does sound like a horror film I mean honestly I'm drawing a blank I'm like you Julia I actually can't think of it
Starting point is 01:11:35 we might have to just whip right around a guy again because he's got another one oh am I allowed to guess again well I mean Dom can't think of anything I don't think I can Julia her well is run dry I mean this isn't? Well, I mean, Dom can't think of anything. I don't think I can. Julia, her well is run dry. I mean, this isn't the answer, but I'm going to say perfect. It's a Jamie E. Curtis movie, but it's not on there.
Starting point is 01:11:52 No. Yeah. So I'm going to go ahead and move on and just announce the remaining title, because I don't think anyone's going to come up with it, especially the exact title. It's Halloween H20, 20 years later. Fuck! Come on.
Starting point is 01:12:07 Okay, you, I was confused. Okay, sorry. I should have. Good old partner. I think Jamie Lee Curtis has been in like five or six movies with the word Halloween in the title. The back and forth is just crazy. But this one they say, it said ends,
Starting point is 01:12:23 which all of them end. They all have credits that run, and you leave. Or if you're at home, you turn it off. Especially if you're watching it on a streamer. What is with the fucking streamers? Like, don't watch these credits! Whatever you do, get out of here! Like, you always have to dive for the remote
Starting point is 01:12:41 to get to watch the credits. It's fucked up. Okay, I think Spielberg's mad about it. to die for the remote to get to watch the credits. It's fucked up. Okay. I think Spielberg's mad about it. Okay, so... And I think Hulu doesn't do that. I'm guessing. One of them doesn't do that.
Starting point is 01:12:54 And HBO's doing that really annoying thing now where if you scroll down to something, it will, like, get bigger and start playing if you stick on it, which I can't stand.
Starting point is 01:13:03 Stop it. I want to just, like, look at the title. I don't want the movie to start. HBO are doing that now. It's a bummer. All right, who did we leave off with? I guess we'll just, since that one just sort of stopped,
Starting point is 01:13:16 we'll just go back to the beginning. We'll start with Dan. All right, Dan, are you ready? Yeah. This next actor, this one's going to be a little tougher, I feel. But we'll see what happens when I say Donald Pleasence. I really wish I knew who that was.
Starting point is 01:13:42 Well, that's the fun part of this game, is as we move on to the other players, you might find out. Yeah, you might. Because we'll come back to you. Dom? No. Julia? Okay, Guy?
Starting point is 01:13:53 The Exorcist? No. Dan? Okay, so an actor not in The Exorcist, or that is not one of their popular movies. Or he's in The Exorcist. He's not in The Exorcist. It's is not one of their most popular movies. He's not in The Exorcist. It's anyone's game. The Outfit?
Starting point is 01:14:12 Oh, that movie that just came out recently? This guy's long dead. He's from the 70s. This guy's long dead. Dom, do you have another guess? Julia? Everything Everywhere All at Once. Back to you, Guy. I was just reading something about something Donald Pustelstein I'm mash I mean it's not in his top four he may have been in it the guns the guns of Navarone that's a
Starting point is 01:14:38 terrific yes no come on I mean at this Doug, can we not get a clue? Oh, no. No, we're going to be here all night. Who is he married to? No, this whole thing is, I'll work this out. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. I'll host this and you guys will play. Okay.
Starting point is 01:14:55 Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. Wrong. Okay, so I'm throwing over all of these because nobody even knows who Donald Pleasance is. Right. Which is fine. Sure. But he's the star of Halloweenlloween oh halloween oh
Starting point is 01:15:08 yes the doctor dr loomis yeah yeah and he's also in a couple of classics called you only live twice and the great escape okay his top four we're back to dan okay l l cool jay to Dan. Okay. LL Cool J. The films of ladies love Cool James. Fucking hell. Yeah. Deep Blue. Hang on. Nobody make a noise. Deep Blue Sea. Because Dan likes to get it correct that is the correct answer that is it alright Dan you did it that's his number one that's his number one so now Dan's on the board
Starting point is 01:15:57 but let's go to Dom you know any LL Cool J movies? I really don't like Drew Barrymore at the beginning of Charlie's Angels go to Tom. I mean... You know any LL Cool J movies? I really don't. Like, Drew Barrymore at the beginning of Charlie's Angels is in a LL Cool J disguise. Like, she looks like him.
Starting point is 01:16:12 Does that count? And then she pulls off the LL Cool J mask. Oh, fine. And it's Drew Barrymore. Then later in the same movie, she puts... She wants to be a man again,
Starting point is 01:16:21 and she puts a fake mustache and a fake beard and looks like a woman pretending to be a man again and she puts a fake mustache and a fake beard and looks like a woman pretending to be a man. But she could look exactly like LL Cool J earlier in the same film. That doesn't count. I mean, it's not in there, no.
Starting point is 01:16:40 It's a complete guess. Step Up. I mean, why wouldn't LL Cool J be in Step Up? But no, that is not it. Julia, do you know any LL Cool J movies? I mean, no movies are called that, but he's in some movies. Nobody's ever like, let's check out this LL Cool J vehicle. It's very much like
Starting point is 01:17:07 a Spike Lee joint. Zoolander? You just have to picture a Kangol hat and then everything below it is LL Cool J. No, I know. Was he in Zoolander? Okay, I know I'm asking.
Starting point is 01:17:22 My guess is Zoolander. Incorrect. Friday? Oh. Was he in Zoo... Okay, I know I'm asking this. Your guess is Zoolander? My guess is Zoolander. Incorrect. Guy. Friday. Oh. We had to double check that one, no? Is he in Friday? Anyone?
Starting point is 01:17:34 I don't feel like he is. I don't... No, it was a grossly... Ice Cube, right? Ice Cube. It was a grossly racist stab in the dark. I know. It's...
Starting point is 01:17:43 Dan? Halloween H20. Full title? Oh, is that not... dark it's dead for a white h2o full title Hollywood aged Halloween h2o 20 years later you're not your turn it's Dan's turn you just gave him the answer oh thank you so much I thought it a bit. I would have said something else. Halloween H20 20 years later? Wrong. You already had my best, so the second attempt was going to be... No, that's correct.
Starting point is 01:18:14 That's so crazy. So, okay. I'll give Dan another point. Good call. I know Dan is running away with this. Grudgingly. Dom? It's more of a hobble. It's your turn, Dom. Okay. Give me another LL Cool J movie.
Starting point is 01:18:28 Oh, shit. No, I don't know. Okay, Julia, do you have any more LL Cool Js? Do you have any LL Cool guesses? It'd be funny if the Js stood for Jesus. I also feel like I'm gonna... I'm just gonna start guessing. It's a tough one.
Starting point is 01:18:48 I'm just gonna start guessing black movies. Love and Basketball? That was true. I mean, he could have been in that. But no, Guy, do you want to take one more swing? No. Wait. I was gonna give you a clue, because you No. I was going to give you a clue
Starting point is 01:19:06 because you helped me. Give me a clue. Big TV. Oh. Come on. Then I'll just think of Law and Order and that's... He's over on CBS.
Starting point is 01:19:20 Okay, then I'm going to say NCIS. Los Angeles. It's not on there, Dan. Thank you, Dan. This is a movie database. Yeah, but you said TV can be on there. It could be when it's a phenomenon like Lost.
Starting point is 01:19:38 Thank you. I am shocked NC CIS Los Angeles is not in his top four. The two remaining titles, well, because they went with movies. That's what happens sometimes. Mind Hunters
Starting point is 01:19:52 and, oh, I got to get the title right. Deliver Us from Eva. Yeah. Good job, LL Cool J. All right. So,
Starting point is 01:20:06 Dan has two points. Dom has one. Guy has one. Julia, it's always great to have you on the show. This is absolutely humiliating. Okay. Dan, are you ready? I think so.
Starting point is 01:20:21 Okay. The films of Tyra Banks. Oh, the tide just turned. Halloween H20, 20 years later. Nope. Damn it. Good guess, though. You always have the popcorn at the wrong time, buddy.
Starting point is 01:20:45 He throws a big mouthful of popcorn right when it's his turn I don't I don't know I don't know Secret Life of Pets We'll come back to you Julia Life Size
Starting point is 01:20:58 No That's great It's not It was a Lifetime movie about a Barbie doll that turned into a real lady. It's not in her top four? By real lady, they mean Tyra Banks.
Starting point is 01:21:10 Which is all kinds of craziness. That's not in her top four? It's not. It's wild. I believe the name of the Britney Spears vehicle that Shonda Rimes wrote was Crossroads. Oh, yeah. She's in that?
Starting point is 01:21:26 No. Yeah, she's in it. No, she isn't. Oh, isn't she? Does she play the Justin Long role? Oh, sorry. I was wrong. I actually know.
Starting point is 01:21:37 We'll see what's going to get back to you, Dan. America's Next Top Model. That is correct. We got the TV thing. Yeah. What else, Dom? The Tyra Banks Show. model. That is correct. We got the TV thing. Yeah. What else, Dom? The Tyra Banks show.
Starting point is 01:21:51 I mean, she did have a show called that, I think. I think she had a talk show for a little while. There's not in there? Nope. Fuck you. Kate Julia. Coyote Ugly. Coyote Ugly is correct. Nice. She's on the board. What else you got, Guy? There's two more.
Starting point is 01:22:09 Two? Yeah, we've got America's Next Top Model. We did America's Next Top Model and Coyote Ugly, and there's two more movies that Tyra was in, according to IMDb. I'm going to have to pass. Damn. Coyote Ugly 2?
Starting point is 01:22:34 It's like half a joke, guys. You don't know either. If there was one and she was in it, it didn't crack her tongue. Okay. Back to you, Dom. Can I get a clue? Tyra Banks is an American supermodel.
Starting point is 01:22:55 Yeah, it's not yet. She's on a TV show right now called Dancing with the Stars. Yeah, it's not. Is that your answer? Yeah, I'll say Dancing with the Stars. You're saying Dancing with the Stars? Sure. Nope. I thought it Dancing with the Stars. You're saying Dancing with the Stars? Sure. Nope.
Starting point is 01:23:07 I thought it was going to happen. Julia. Two more. They might be. Well played, Doug. Yeah. I think we've covered her TV career, though. I think.
Starting point is 01:23:25 No, we haven't, because she was famously on The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. You think that's in there? Don't do this to me. Don't give me hope. I'm going to say, once again, love and basketball. I would like to say The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. It's always a fun guess, but no.
Starting point is 01:23:51 No, no, no. No to both of those. Dan, anything? I think you're going to win this thing. What if? Scary Movie 3? That's a good guess. She appears, I believe, as herself in Tropic Thunder.
Starting point is 01:24:08 Really? Yeah. And then the fourth one is... Godfather. The Godfather? That's your guess? Yeah. So close.
Starting point is 01:24:19 Halloween Resurrection. Oh! It was close. Dan Van Kirk is our winner today! Did it for you. And you. And if we needed it, I was going to have to go to Busta Rhymes, who was in Halloween Resurrection and movies called Narc, Blade II, and Shaft.
Starting point is 01:24:45 All right. Rest in peace. Okay, so Dan Van Kirk, go ahead and do your plugs. Oh, okay. You can listen to Pen Pals. It drops every single week
Starting point is 01:24:53 wherever you listen to your stuff. It's me and Rory Scoble answering letters that you send us. That's why it's called Pen Pals. And then Dumb People Town, the Sklar brothers and I host that show.
Starting point is 01:25:02 We each have a story, a dumb story from around the news that gets sent in and we just goof around with another great comedic person, other than that you can check me out November 17th 18th and 19th at the Come and Take It Comedy Festival in
Starting point is 01:25:16 Houston, Texas, we'll be doing a lot of pen pals and I'm headlining there as well everything else is at danielvankirk.com yeah, you'll be on Doug Loves Movies too if you're still down to do that for sure, is that on Sundayvankirk.com yeah you'll be on Doug Loves Movies too if you're still down to do that for sure
Starting point is 01:25:27 is that on Sunday I think so yeah then I'll be there you got it yeah we're doing Wide World at Doug's on Saturday and then Doug Loves Movies
Starting point is 01:25:36 on Sunday okay I'm there cool great alright Dominic absolutely nothing I'm a human
Starting point is 01:25:42 I'm great see you later I know you just came here to use the restroom and eat popcorn Dominic? Absolutely nothing. I'm a human. I'm great. See you later. I know you just came here to use the restroom and eat popcorn. But thank you so much for coming. Always a pleasure. Appreciate it. Julia Clare, great first-time live audience appearance. They clearly love you.
Starting point is 01:26:03 No, no, no. What would you like to promote? Do you have any other friends that have podcasts you're not on I will be on Lost it's a podcast where I can't find the TV no I write the daily newsletter for Crooked Media, the What A Day newsletter. It's recapping the day news with jokes.
Starting point is 01:26:32 It's really fun, and I get to put a lot of stupid things in there. If you want to subscribe to it, it's at crooked.com slash newsletters. And you can follow me for all my other dates on Twitter at OhJuliaTweets. O-H Julia Tweets. And that's it. It's a good follow, everybody. Guy Branum. Buy Bros from iTunes or Amazon or wherever you buy movies.
Starting point is 01:27:01 Buy it and watch it. It's very funny. I like it. I am in about seven minutes of the movie. Thank you. So is Judi Dench, and that worked out. What? Judi Dench was in like seven minutes of the movie,
Starting point is 01:27:21 and that worked out well for her. Oh, I see what you're saying. You crush as hard as she does. Thank you. I expect to be nominated for but not win Best Supporting Actress this year for the same reason as... They gave it to a lady once with a shorter performance
Starting point is 01:27:36 than yours, Beatrice Strait. Beatrice Strait for Network. Don't fucking come for me. I'm sorry I dropped the ball on Donald Pleasance. He's't been around for a minute. Also, it's just so funny that the thing was so pitched towards you have to know Halloween
Starting point is 01:27:53 movies and clearly none of you do. So that ended up being super fun. Where's the winner? Who were you playing for, Dan? Right over here. Oh my God. Bob. Bob and Jess drove so far to get this crate
Starting point is 01:28:08 and take it back home with them. Congratulations. Well done. Don't get it wet. Don't feed it after midnight. They do not like bright lights. He's talking about the James Corden microphone that's in there. They hate horrible food service.
Starting point is 01:28:33 All right, so we'll be back here again next month on November 12th. And thank you, Dynasty Typewriter. One more time for all of my guests, Dominic, Daniel, Guy, and Julia. As always, only your mother truly loves you. Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes above his viewing prowess makes him foggy. There's no room in his heart for you because Doug loves movies.

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