Doug Loves Movies - Jenny Johnson, Martha Kelly and Kenice Mobley guest
Episode Date: December 12, 2022Doug welcomes Jenny Johnson, Martha Kelly and Kenice Mobley to the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on Stitcher Premium. For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to&n...bsp;stitcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming baby sticky seeds with 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth.
There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug loves movies.
Hey, hey, hey everybody. My name is Doug and I love holiday movies and non-holiday movies.
This is Doug Loves Movies. holiday movies and non-holiday movies this is dougla's movies and my guests today are a couple
of returning champs and a first timer that we're excited to have on the show they are jenny johnson
khanis mobli and martha kelly hello what up hi hi let's meet everybody individually and alphabetically by first name.
That means our first guest I'm going to mention today is our new guest.
First time on the show. Excited to have her. It's Jenny Johnson, everybody.
Hello, Jenny.
Hey, hey, what's happening, Doug? Thank you for having me.
Thank you for being here. I've been enjoying your tweets about Marvel films.
You decided to watch all the Marvel movies and tweet about it.
Yes.
Well, I got myself a little writing job with GQ,
and I had never seen any of the Marvel movies.
So they asked me if I would watch every single one of them
and then leave comedy commentary and live tweet
them. So that's what I've been doing. And it's, it's been a journey. I didn't realize each of
these movies were like three hours long. They tend to be a little long and, um, not, you know,
always worthy of that length, but at least you can, you probably do other things during the
closing credits. You don't really have to sit through those to you. I have to pause like frequently
because I'm writing like I have to write, you know, so it's like a three hour movie takes me
six hours to watch because I can't. Oh goodness. Yeah. So it's, it's a full, it's a full day.
Like, and the one Saturday a few weeks ago when I finally wrapped them up and I did Infinity Wars and Endgame in the same day.
Yeah.
I mean, I started at like 8 in the morning and I think I finished at like 11 o'clock at night.
And I was a wreck.
I was like emotionally wrecked.
I'm like, I was gutted over this movie.
I got so invested in watching all of those movies and all the characters.
Some were not my favorite but
right well that's the thing is it's uh it's quite a roller coaster but to do it all
like to binge watch the you know how many movies is it now i mean i watched like 11 years of movies
and yeah four months it was like four months i do so what do you have an absolute favorite or is that too hard to pick?
Thor Ragnarok I thought was the greatest one.
That was my favorite.
That's a fantastic choice.
Well done.
I thought that one beginning to end was just pound for pound.
That was the best one.
I was so fucking pumped.
Like right at the beginning, like the very beginning,
when they started playing Led Zeppelin, Immigrant Song,
and I was like, oh, fuck, yeah. I i was so psyched like this is the greatest movie i really did love
end game i mean it was like more wrapping it all up but i thought thor ragnarok was the best one
that was my favorite yeah i'm pretty much in agreement there it's it's if not my favorite
it's way up there because it really does hit all the right
things that all
the movies should try to achieve.
It's not easy.
There's a lot of people
in the pot.
You watched
all the Marvel movies?
I think I've seen all of them.
There might be one or two missing
from especially the sequely ones. Like I,
I never saw the second venom.
Oh yeah. No.
Well, who's your, like,
do you have a favorite Marvel character and then a very least favorite?
Uh, well, I'll tell you because of Thor Ragnarok, that's sort of,
but in general I've, I've, I've liked Thor,
like the first couple of thor movies i didn't love
because he wasn't that funny in them but as soon as he started being funny across the board in all
marvel things like when he gained weight at one point all that stuff that was so great yeah uh
he really uh because that guy's always been a you know handsome but funny you know so i thought they
did a really good job of finally leaning into that and so he sort of became my favorite character just by being
uh the funniest but i could talk about this all day but we've got two other guests
bring them on and uh they are both uh champions returning uh to battle it out
uh starting with kanice mobley is back hello kanice hello i have
watched all of the marvel movies and most of the shows i think there's like one episode of a show
that i haven't seen i'm such a big dork for that i could listen to people talk about it for ages
so that's perfect they're really great they're absolutely great movies i love it it's well i'm
glad that that was your you know because do you think did you go into it thinking there was a
chance that they it wouldn't be for you and you it would just be drudgery i kind of did i mean which
is i guess a little bit of the reason i hadn't watched them to begin with i thought they were
going to be like cheesy and stupid and i wouldn't be able to get into it or something and then like
the first one i watched i was like oh my god i'm all in i'm like invested i'm like i'm gonna die for these people they're
the greatest fucking people ever i was so fucking pumped like yeah yeah right from right out of the
gate with iron man like robert downey jr really established a tone like he really was like funny, but you know, cynical and also, but also,
you know, a hero in his own way. Um, speaking of heroes, Canice, how has it felt being a champion
for the past week? Uh, it's felt good. I, people I know have reached out and said, congratulations.
And that felt really nice. I mean, I have a degree, like I went to film school. So they're like, you're finally
using that degree. And I'm like, I am using my degree. So, you know, it's really life affirming.
I recommend it for everyone who has the opportunity to do it, like winning at something.
It's pretty great. Well, our third guest today has been a, like a returning champ,
a dangling champ, if you will,
for a few weeks now because of scheduling issues. She's been very busy with drive-thru lines and stuff.
We're so happy to have you back. Martha Kelly. Hello, Martha.
Hi, Doug. Right out of the gate, I want to apologize
for bringing shame to the office of Doug Love's movie
champion. It was super late I want to apologize for bringing shame to the office of Doe Loves Movie Champion.
It was super late and it was entirely my fault.
Well, the listeners, it doesn't affect them at all how late anybody was today.
So that's, you know, that's water under the bridge.
My question for you, Martha, since the last time we spoke a few weeks ago
and you walked
away with the win, have you had a chance to watch that movie I recommended to you, The Disenchanted?
I heard it sucked.
I have not watched it.
And I will say mitigating factors.
I started a new antidepressant.
And so I'm very hopeful that I will watch more movies now that I'm on an upward trajectory.
Oh, that's good.
Yes.
Well, you know, I guess you have to be somewhat careful what movies you watch.
I think since you are such a chipmunk fan,
the reason, Jenny, that I recommended this movie to Martha is because there is a character who is a chipmunk,
but he turns into a cat.
So he's a cat that looks like a chipmunk and uh i figured that
that's the sort of thing that martha kelly would uh appreciate i would and i i am gonna um i'm
making a second note for myself to watch it i'm gonna start a countdown calendar this is very
exciting wait waiting for the day when this happens. Cause I think you really,
you're good. I think you'll thank me.
Maybe, maybe I hope so.
You might be like that goddamn cat chipmunk was a nightmare.
Oh, hang on just a second, Doug. So Martha, I'm hearing your voice.
You're you're on Hacks, yes?
Yes, it was season two.
Absolutely. I know exactly.
OK, I'm like, why do I know that beautiful fucking voice?
That's my mom.
That's my homegirl.
No, I'm like, I know your voice like it's like, oh, why?
Why do I know this beautiful, angelic voice?
It's fucking Martha Kelly.
Well, let me blow your mind even further, if you don't mind.
She, Martha, is, of course, a member of the Marvel Universe.
Oh, I know, because she was in Spider-Man Homecoming.
Yeah, she was the tour guide at the Washington Monument.
I remember.
When shit goes down with the elevator, which is one of my greatest fears,
when I went to that particular monument, I took the stairs.
I took the stairs. I took a picture of the monument as my wiener.
I laid in the grass and did that thing that people do.
That was my picture of the Washington Monument.
Martha, I didn't know you were canon.
I don't, but I don't know if it counts as canon
if you never come back in any of the sequels.
I feel like there is...
I don't know how it works.
I think there's one and done characters who are also canon.
You know what I mean?
I like it when I see them jump over in the DC universe.
Like, fuck you, Marvel.
I'm over here now.
Like, I've seen Willem Dafoe.
He's Green Goblin.
He just jumped over into a Batman movie.
Yeah, he'll go wherever he wants that, Willem Dafoe.
There's no slowing him down.
No, no. He will always play
that lead rom-com character that
we love.
Just a sweet friend.
He's a sweetheart.
Before we
play some intense games with these
fierce competitors today,
I would like to ask
each of you to recommend a holiday movie that you
enjoy and wouldn't mind recommending we'll start with kines um okay did you recommend something
last week i did last week i recommended the family stone and this week i'm going to recommend uh just
because i've been
watching it since i was a child a muppet christmas carol not the original one i actually know more
about a muppet christmas carol than like the dickens uh book so i'm excited for the season i
have a a nephew who is two and a half and he like myself will probably get scared at the ghost of Christmas yet to come.
I'm so excited.
There's people that will say out loud that it is the best Muppet movie, the Muppet Christmas Carol.
Yeah, I'm one of those people.
And that Michael Caine gives like a typical Michael Caine, but Academy Award level performance in the film.
He is a father figure to me based on this movie alone.
He's so good at it.
He sings in it.
It's fantastic.
I can't wait to hear him sing.
Well, that is an excellent choice.
Thank you for reminding me about it because it's one I should revisit
because I haven't seen it in a second.
Thank you for reminding me about it because it's one I should revisit because I haven't seen it in a second.
Martha, I know there's no necessarily, none of the Chipmunks films,
or maybe you can correct me, did any of them take place over the holidays
or any of them Christmas themed?
Yes.
Yeah, the first one, the one from I think 2005,
the very first one is absolutely a Christmas movie.
Alvin, Simon, and Theodore meet Dave because they live in a tree that gets cut down
and brought to a record company as their lobby Christmas tree.
Right.
So that's how they get into the record biz and become recording artists
yeah and then they they have a gift exchange with dave on christmas morning and uh and alvin
gives dave his own wallet that so it's very cute
why does he have a wallet
it's really cute
what animal is the wallet made out of is my question
their brother is that your recommendation then martha or would you like to recommend a different
holiday film i i actually i will recommend that people go back
and see the classic rudolph the red-nosed reindeer again just because it's funny as an adult parts of
it that uh i missed as a kid like uh yukon cornelius and the abominable snowman and also the guy the elf who wants to be a dentist
yeah it's um as an adult it's really as a kid you're like yeah dentist that seems like
probably better than making toys but then as an adult you're like what a weirdo that that is
you know he's on top of the world literally the north pole just making toys and making people happy he wants to
become an evil dentist yeah i know i am a great dentist and it's really hard each time i see him
not to ask him why do you want to do this it's his name it would be crazy if your dentist's name was Herbie. It actually is Herbie and he has blonde hair that goes up in a little frosting.
Yeah, he's got a nice little flip there in the front.
Yeah.
Well, that's an excellent recommendation.
So it's, you know, it's several minutes shy of feature film length, but it's still, it feels enough like a movie that it deserves to be treated as one.
Jenny, now that you've heard these two suggestions,
could you recommend a holiday movie?
I watched Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer last night.
It was on CBS, and I have to agree with Martha.
That was pretty hilarious to see as an adult because I didn't realize like the
moment Rudolph's nose shines, Santa's like, well, we can get that fixed.
Yeah.
Like there was no like, Hey, you're cool, buddy. We still support you.
It was like, Oh, look at this piece of shit. Like they,
they were not on board with Rudolph.
Yeah. No. And the, like the, with rudolph no and they're like the that head
that deer that's like the the freaking you know like the gym coach or whatever he's just pure evil
that was a great one i tell you what i love to watch it's i think it's a christmas movie
is bad santa oh yeah every year i watch it on like on Christmas Eve. Love it.
I always love home alone, but bad Santa has always become like my favorite.
Bad Santa's really got something for everybody. I think it's really, um,
there's a lot happening in, in bad Santa. Um,
and I'll even watch bad Santa too. Just stuff to the goodwill,
the fumes off of Bad
Santa just because
I want to spend more time with Billy Bob
Thornton being that
irascible while dressed as Santa Claus
just pissing
himself as Santa I'm like that's my Santa
Claus that's what I want to see
I don't think he ever even has padding
at any point he's just like yeah
Santa Claus just dealing with it he just looks like point. He's just like, yeah, I'm just giving you Santa Claus.
Just deal with it.
He just looks like a meth addict and just like a fucking pervert.
Like, yeah, all right, whatever.
Yeah.
All right.
Well, that's quite a matchup we have between those three titles
to see which one people enjoy the most around the holidays
or any time of year.
And we're going to play some games, if you don't mind,
after this quick break.
We'll be right back.
We are back.
And I want to play a game that I just made up.
This is a brand new game.
And I didn't get a chance to tell my guests before we started recording today that this game, both games today are pretty ridiculous, but this first one is really ridiculous. I think of it, Kameez does have the paperwork that shows, you know,
it's official that she knows a lot about movies.
So maybe she will be good at this.
I make no promises.
Okay.
That's fair.
The game is called you do the math.
Is anyone,
are any of the three of you good at math?
I was told there would be no math.
Who are you talking to? three of you good at math? I was told there would be no math.
Who are you talking to?
Who's saying that shit behind my back? I want no part of this.
Doug, you lied to me.
I thought this was going to be fun.
You know how much I love math.
Martha, where are you at in math?
Well, I'm terrible at it,
but I did want to let you know that in the squeak wall,
Simon does say the line, you do the math, to a high school girl he's trying to flirt with.
He uses that expression?
Or is he actually about to do math?
No, he says you do the math because he's trying to impress her that he doesn't have to go to bed until 10 o'clock at night.
Right?
Yeah.
So just crunch the numbers and you know you're dealing with an amazing chipmunk.
Yeah.
And I just want to be clear.
I'm not telling you because I think it's funny, which obviously it isn't because nobody laughed,
but it is relevant because it's the name of the game we're about to play.
Yeah, but also I think you get a lot more quiet laughs than you realize.
Well, I'm trying not to interrupt by laughing.
I'm like trying not to laugh
I have a lot of questions about this human chipmunk relationship
but we'll talk about that off air
I'm happy to, it's all I want to talk about
I will
give a movie
math equation to one of you,
and you just have to figure it out and give me the answer.
And if you can't think of it, the next person will get a chance,
and then my third guest after that.
And if nobody gets these, nobody should feel bad about it,
because there is a lot of math involved.
I wouldn't hold this.
But you can just guess.
We're going to play another game.
The next game is going to be multiple choice, no math,
and not even more than two choices.
I can't wait.
It'll be much more of an ASMR kind of game than this one.
But we're going to start with you, Jenny.
You get to go first.
Sweet.
Here's the equation.
This is what I want you to figure out the number,
the total number of all of the Ocean's movies.
So that, of course, is the...
That's four of them
how how much do you think they total if you just add up those numbers
oh of all the titles oh the titles you didn't say that part oh i'm sorry oh i thought you're
saying the numbers in the oceans movies yeah a number of guys. I thought you were saying like how many...
Yeah.
I think they add one each movie
after the first Clooney.
But
that would be...
Just give a guess.
It's 44?
No.
Kinise.
42? 42? No. Martha. Canis 42
no Martha
sorry I couldn't unmute
I can't answer because I
added it
I cheated
I added it on my calculator
you can use a pen if you want
or a calculator
at least you have to know
what the numbers would be in the first place.
Oh, yeah.
I'm glad. I was using my finger in the air
trying to do math.
But I think you both came close.
So what's your number, Martha?
I'm going to say it's
44.
So here's where
it gets, this one's a trick question
because there
was Ocean's Eleven starring
Frank Sinatra
and all of his boys.
You son of a...
Yeah, and then there was
Ocean's Eleven with Clooney and Pitt
and then 12 and 13
and then 8
with Sandy Bullock. Yeah, I wasn't adding in frank yeah so frank
44 was frankless but uh but see that's what i'm saying excellent attempts by everybody
let's try another one jenny i feel like you set me up to fail. Okay, go ahead.
Jenny,
you five,
seven,
one times the number of guns in the title of that Denzel Wahlberg movie.
And I know his name is Denzel Washington.
He's called Denzel Wahlberg.
Denzel Wahlberg.
I'm such a fan.
I'm such a fan.
I hope he plays the next.
Yeah.
So this is,
you have to take the number of guns in the title of that movie that they did
together and multiply it with
571. And multiply
it?
Uh-huh.
I know.
Sounds harder than
it is. No, it doesn't.
I very strongly disagree
with you. Martha's got a tongue player.
She's going to run away with this one.
Let Martha go. I've got nothing.
I don't know.
What about Kniece?
What do you think, Kniece?
So I'm like, wait a second.
How many guns were there?
So I was like, wait, is it 21 guns?
But then I was like, wait, that's 21 bridges or something.
So I'm like, I'm not looking this up.
I'm just genuinely confused.
Crap.
How many guns are there yeah that's key to figuring this out is how many guns there were no it was you five seven one
and then multiply and then i you lost me after that and then it's like here you say anything
about the movie like i don't know what i would have multiplied that with i have no idea martha can you just say the question
again from the beginning hey hey everybody my name is doug and welcome okay so it's
there's a movie called u57571, a stupid war movie,
and so the number is 571,
times number of guns in the title
of the Denzel Washington-Mark Wahlberg movie
that they appeared in together.
I'm going to say the number is zero.
Oh, that's fun.
That's really fun, but that is incorrect uh the movie was called
two guns okay so you just needed 571 times two which is 1142 okay i didn't know the name yeah
yeah we're back to you jenny oh i think there's more math in this i feel good i feel
good about this one i don't i don't know that's a perfect fit for you this last one lop my balls
off i have no confidence fire away doug let's see what we got
percentage of who's you know the who's that live in whoville
percentage of who's who don't mind when christmas is taken away one only one percent of the who's
don't mind yep that's it one christmas is taken away that is incorrect that's it sticking with it
one you're wrong uh because we're specifically talking about who's,
and we're not including Grinch in the number,
and maybe nobody's not upset.
What?
Like, these are Christmas who's.
You've seen it.
You've watched it.
Yeah.
They love Christmas, so it's 0% or chill with this?
Let me tell you the question again percentages of who's who don't mind when xmas doesn't happen okay zero percent of who's don't mind because they
they fucking love christmas dude that's like their whole thing they have like yeah outfits
like in in stuff they're really into christmas so i'm gonna say zero zero percent so you're
saying they love it so much that none of them don't mind what it's taking away none of them
don't mind is a double negative therefore saying yeah they do mind yeah zero percent don't mind so a hundred percent do mind
oh that's some english right there interesting percentage of who's who don't mind christmas
doesn't happen see to me i thought that was a hundred percent because they all don't mind
they're all cool with it not happening that's the point i don't remember
that that's the point of that's the point of the original television program that they
undermined with the feature film with the feature film they're all a bunch of greedy weirdos
okay then i just again like to me i remember maybe the feature film where they're like
what the hell like we love christmas yeah this question isn't fair remember maybe the feature film where they're like what the hell like we
love christmas yeah this question isn't fair because of the feature film television show
divide so i am eliminating this question from the show and we will edit it from no we won't edit it
but um back to you jenny yes martha thank you for standing by i'm Martha, thank you for standing by. I'm standing by.
Thank you for doing it.
Jenny? Yes.
Number of
Paddington movies
minus the number
of Hocus Pocus movies.
Zero.
That is correct correct oh my god
suck on that shit
oh my god
I feel good about myself
two Paddington movies
two Hocus Pocus films
well done
thank you
the number of dwarves
in Snow White and the Black Dwarves
times the number of Highlanders.
martha you're up next if kines doesn't come up with the correct number i'm standing by i wish i had the bell like on the script spelling bee that that bell
that they uh they ring when the person is wrong or they ring it when they're right.
I think they ring it when they're right. But when they're wrong, it's just silence.
Or they can do that one that they want you to just sit in your failure. So I got it wrong.
Yeah. How many dwarves are there? There's seven, right?
Yeah. What's, what's your number? I thought it was seven because
Highlander, there can be only one.
That is correct.
Oh my god.
I'm sorry. I just got lost babbling about other
things. I just wasn't following the
plot. I was legitimately stressing
out. Like, okay, wait.
Have I forgotten math?
You're right. There can be only one
Highlander and there were seven dwarfs.
So you are correct.
Martha, here's your chance to get in this game.
All right.
Apollo blank plus the number of Toy Story movies.
So it's the number in the Apollo blank
and then the number of Toy Story movies.
Okay.
I think I could be wrong,
but I think there are four Toy Story movies
and it's Apollo 13, so 17.
Thank you for showing your work.
And that is
correct. Oh, wow.
Okay, great. You did it.
Oh my God, we were all winners, y'all.
All winners, but now we have a
three-way tie. Wow.
Just for this game. It doesn't
matter who wins this game because we still got another
game to play and the winner of this game just gets to go first in the next game so jenny yep you'll win
this game and be a half champion if you can tell me if you can fill in the blank jennifer garner is blank going on
30
13
that is correct
you did it
yeah
I don't know if that's a hard question or not
but we also did have to settle
the tie somehow
so Jenny Johnson
first time player going into the next game and the lead off full position,
if you will. We'll do that right after this. We'll be right back.
We are back. Such an exciting game today.
You do the math was such a hit with everybody.
I can't wait to never play that game again.
I love that. I'll never stop talking about it oh okay good get the word out about you do the math and uh you know i'm gonna i'm gonna
steal that moment where uh chipmunk says you do the math i'm gonna find it i'm gonna watch that
entire film i'm gonna watch all of the films to find that one moment You said it was in the first one, right, Martha?
I'm 99% sure.
No, it's in the squeakquel.
The squeakquel.
Okay.
Oh, right. That's what you said.
Yes.
Okay.
So I'm going to watch the squeakquel, find that quote,
and make it my ringtone.
Okay.
So this next game we're going to play to determine a winner today.
Kinesia and Martha both showed up today champions,
but one or both of them can walk away no longer holding that title.
And we're going to play a game called whose tagline is it anyway?
Holiday edition.
Oh, damn.
I'll say a tagline from a motion picture.
And then I'll give you two options.
And you tell me which one that movie is the tagline for.
Okay.
Yeah.
Jenny's going to go first.
I'm going to switch the order around from there.
We're going to go to Martha and then to Kniece.
And, you know know if you miss it
you don't get the point and we move on
to the next player and they get
a brand new tagline
to guess
okay
starting with Jenny
the tagline is
science fun fiction at its height.
Exclamation point.
Science fun fiction at its height.
That's the tagline for either Santa Claus conquers the Martians from 1964 or
eight bit Christmas from
2021
starring Neil Patrick Harris?
I think it's the 8-Bit Christmas one.
You're going 8-Bit Christmas?
Yeah.
Incorrect.
Santa Claus Conquers the Martians.
Well, I only saw one of those.
A terrific movie if you like movies that are not terrific.
If you want a holiday movie that's just weird and strange,
it's a bunch of people, a bunch of Martians uh get get mixed up with santa claus i don't i don't know if conquerors
is really the right word for what happens here i don't think santa claus like uh you know takes
control of all the martians or anything like that but um who's the famous person in it i think linda
blair is in it i think a young she's always known for her loving, warm roles.
Yeah, I think a young Linda Blair plays
like a green-faced
person who spits.
Martian who gets conquered by
Santa.
Oh no, that sounds terrible.
That sounds about like
my Christmas when I go back home to Texas.
So that's going to be about the same thing you the conquering happens yeah
yeah that's part of it how come that's not a movie yet that's a fun title the conquering
the conquering a christmas movie the conquering the conquering at christmas
when my christmas got conquered um okay so jenny uh sorry about that you missed that one but
we'll be back to you in a second okay martha
yes i just wanted to tell you i've seen uh santa claus conquers the martians multiple times as a
kid and they sing a song called hooray for santee claus for some reason it's a catchy
song yeah so and it and they they can push a button and a glass of chocolate milk appears
that made it a great movie as a kid i there were just enough things like that uh interspersed
throughout and then lots of commercials for sugary cereals that kept me on board. Definitely. As a child.
And do you think I was right about Linda Blair?
Do you think it's some other child actress?
I can't remember. It sounds like it could be her.
Yeah. But it's been a long time.
Yeah. I wouldn't put a lot of money on it, but you know, I definitely think it would do well in a pub quiz.
All right, Martha.
Here's your tagline.
Okay.
You can't re-gift family.
You can't re-gift family.
And I'm sorry this one didn't go to Kniez,
re-gift family and uh i'm sorry this one didn't go to kines because the options are uh the family stone or love the coopers both starring diane keaton family stone was 2005 love the coopers
2015 which one do you think that tagline comes from martha um i've seen The Family Stone a lot
and I love it, but
shit.
I'm going to say love
The Coopers.
Because you love Family Stone so much?
Well,
because I know that you
that Kanice recommended
it last time and so I
can't believe you would ask a question
that she would know the answer to right out of the gate.
In other words, I think it's a trick question.
It's not, oh boy.
Oh, damn.
I mean, I think of it as you going,
oh, you'll think it's the Family Stone because you recommended it,
but actually it's Love the Coopers.
That's my logic, and I'm probably wrong.
So you're going with Love the Coopers?
Yeah.
Sorry.
That is correct.
Oh, get it, Martha.
I think the clue in there might be, and correct me if I'm wrong,
Family Stone was from all the way back in 2005.
So I'm thinking maybe re-gifting wasn't as common of an expression.
Yeah.
Back then, whereas Love the Coopers, they were all about it.
Yeah, that makes sense.
Yeah.
And they threw out that initially they wanted to say,
you can't re-give cancer but nobody
was responding because somehow 10 years apart diane keaton is in two different families where
she's dying like it's kind of the same movie but but different so uh i get them confused all the time. She's like the Barbara Hershey of holiday movies. She just dies and everything.
Yeah.
I saw Diane Keaton
in person walking
across.
I saw Diane Keaton in person
passing in a hallway and she was
luminous. This is just a couple
years ago.
Okay.
In a hat. Was she was she wearing gloves yeah hat and
gloves no and it wasn't even a showbiz setting it was just a office building and she walked by
she looked great all right probably like the CEO of a financial company and we don't even know it
like she just does yeah we don't know what Diane Keaton does
she's up to some shit
she's up to some we don't know
yeah alright
all right let's do this
this one's all about you
the tagline
is we're back
exclamation point
and the question is
is that the tagline for gremlins or Gremlins 2, the new batch?
We're back, I would guess.
Gremlins 2, the new batch.
Which, honestly, one of the underrated movies.
It has a musical number.
It has smart gremlins.
It has sexy gremlins.
It has it all.
And if you guys haven't seen it, I highly recommend it. Even if it's not the answer, I still think Gremlins it has sexy gremlins it has it all uh and if you guys haven't seen it I highly recommend it
even if it's not the answer I still think gremlins 2 is great yeah and it's got the
um you know it's got the great uh talking the one gremlin that figures out how to talk
yeah and uh and it's voiced by the late great Tony Randall have y'all ever seen the key and
peel sketch of them talking about making gremlins too?
Yes! And that's funny too!
That's one of the funniest sketches ever.
And they just like, it seems like such a ridiculous thing.
And it's like, nope, that's exactly how the gremlins were made.
It's like lightning gremlin, bug gremlin, lady gremlin, gooky eye gremlin.
No, they really do just, you know, oh, look, the one with the mohawk.
Let's call him snake.
Okay, so that's your answer, Kanisha?
You're going with the gremlins, too?
I'm sticking with that.
Yes.
Okay.
Well, unfortunately, this was a trick question.
This was a trick question because
when they re-released
Gremlins, that was
the tagline, we're back.
That's so mean
and I'm personally hurt.
Before Gremlins 2 ever even happened,
this all went
down. Yeah, it was a
very mean trick question.
I apologize and I hope we can move forward
i don't really see how y'all can rebuild from this but what's wrong you know jenny it's uh
we're you and i are on thin ice as well so let's uh yeah let's see what happens next i'm just poking
this whole thing jenny this is another tough one oh shit uh here's the catchphrase last christmas i gave you my heart
now i want eyeballs doesn't even make sense last christmas i gave you my heart now i want eyeballs
like i don't know so it's an exchange program or something one of those like white
elephant things so um it's in beverly hills like your options are was that the remake of black
christmas from 2006 or the remake of black christmas from 2019 uh read me that tagline one more time last christmas i gave you my heart now i want eyeballs
it's so stupid i'm like is it 2019 stupid or is it 2006 stupid
i don't know i'm gonna go 2006 1974 yeah let's just go with 2006 i don't know. I'm going to go 2006. 1974. Yeah, let's just go with 2006.
You're going 2006?
Yeah, I'm going.
I like that answer personally, but I have to check with the judges.
That is correct.
Oh, my God. I got it.
2006. You're on the board, Jenny.
It's all coming together.
But now Martha gets another shot.
Martha?
Yes.
What movie had the tagline,
Have Yourself a Scary Little Christmas?
Was it Black Christmas from 2019 or Black Christmas
from 1974?
I'm going to say Black Christmas from 2019.
Okay.
Incorrect. I'm sorry.
Oh, man.
Yeah, that's from the 1974 original.
The OG Black Christmas was Have Yourself a Scary Little Christmas.
But we still have a tie between Martha and Jenny,
and now it's Kniece's turn.
Kniece.
Yes.
Which movie has the tagline
Disaster is
a Small Step Away?
Was it
The Holiday with
Cameron Diaz
or Mr. Bean's Holiday
with Mr.
Bean?
What the hell?
Disaster is a small step away.
The holiday or Mr. Bean's
holiday? Okay, I don't work
in marketing, but as a tagline,
Disaster is a small step
away, I don't think it works well for either of those
movies. Although, if we're saying
okay, it's on a
personal level, yes, Mr. Bean causes
nightmares and disasters wherever he goes.
So I'm going to go with Mr. Bean, even though the holiday is like, I mean, it's a compelling film.
I like it.
I watch it every year.
So, yeah, Mr. Bean.
I'm going to go Mr. Bean.
Right?
But, you know, disaster is a small step away.
You only have to step out of your house to have a snowdrift fall on your head.
Yeah, you don't have to go all the way to the UK and sleep with Jude Law to have a disaster.
You don't have to do that.
Extra steps aren't necessary.
So yeah, Mr. Bean, because he will cause a disaster, probably.
That is correct.
Mr. Bean's holiday.
Thank goodness.
I was like, what the hell?
I just want to listen to that process over
and over of kines coming to that answer that was the greatest journey i've ever taken thank you
another one from uh from mr bean that i wanted to use mr beans holiday also had the tagline
uh i guess it's a picture of Mr. Bean and somebody else,
but the tagline was just,
one of these two people has a brain the size of a peanut.
And I didn't think anyone would confuse the holiday with that,
because I don't know.
That'd be pretty mean, yeah.
Who would be peanut-brained in that movie?
Kate Winslet, I guess?
It'd be Jack Black.
Not too mean, but it would absolutely, his character makes the least sense of anyone in that movie. Kate Winslet, I guess. It'd be Jack Black. But it would absolutely, his character
makes the least sense of anyone in that movie.
Okay. Yeah, he's a little
shoehorned, unfortunately.
Alright, so, Kaniece got that
one right, so guess what? We've got a three-way
tie. This is so exciting.
But
Martha, I mean,
excuse me, Jenny is
up now. Jenny, it's your turn. Okay. If you get this one right,
you win the whole shebang the whole day.
You can walk around with your head up high as a champion. Whoa.
If you miss it, we'll have to do another one.
A lot of pressure. Okay.
The tagline is what the Dickens have they done to Scrooge?
And the options are Scrooge from 1970 or Scrooged starring William Murray.
I'm going to go with Scrooge starring William Murray.
You like that one?
For what the Dickens have they done to Scrooge?
Yeah, that sounds like something that would happen to old Billy Boy.
Damn it.
I'm sorry.
Motherfucker.
It was Scrooge.
What the Dickens, have they done?
They just meant they made it a musical.
You set me up to fail meant they made it a musical you set me up to fail you well the thing is when you say i say you have to fail keep in mind i don't know who these are
going to be who's going to fail with i don't know what order anybody's going to end up answering in
but that means that we have to do one more to settle this thing and uh so martha you're
up i'm gonna get this if you get this right martha you are a winner today if you get this wrong
a winner is kines either way a returning champion is taking this thing home and thank you to jenny
johnson for being here and i just want to tell you both good luck
now you got to do like leslie nelson airplane and say that was it i want to tell you both good luck
we're all counting on you
uh who did i say was going for oh kines i mean no martha excuse me martha Oh, we know Martha. Excuse me, Martha. Martha, you got to answer this one.
The tagline is the ultimate battle between naughty and nice.
Is that the tagline from Eight Crazy Nights or the Hebrew Hammer?
Ooh, the Hebrew Hammer.
That is your final answer, Hebrew Hammer? that is your final answer hebrew hammer that is my final answer
that is incorrect it's eight crazy nights i don't know the ultimate value naughty and nice just
feels like they're just trying to appeal to people who are jewish uh which feels a little
odd for an approach on that movie but uh i guess it worked
eight crazy nights was a was a big hit and uh kenise mobley once again is our winner congratulations
kitties how do you feel about winning like that thank you winning by default is honestly the easiest way to win. And I highly recommend it.
It feels really good.
I think I'm going to send this to my professors from film school to say,
you did a good job.
Yeah, this has affirmed me on a base level.
And I hope that my mother's listening.
Excellent.
And you get to do your plugs first.
What would you like to plug?
Okay.
So I would like to plug okay so i would like to plug
my album follow-up question which came out this friday and you should definitely give it a listen
but also just you know i do shows around new york and lots of places so like check out my website
kaneesmobile.com for show dates and stuff thanks kanees thank you
stuff thanks kanice thank you martha kelly hi hi what would you like to plug martha um i don't want to plug anything because i'm uh i'm not doing i'm not doing anything between now and january
except being on twitter and having a nervous breakdown.
I guess I can plug that.
Martha Kelly 3 on Twitter.
Yeah.
Send Kelly some nice messages.
Martha Kelly, not Kelly.
You can send them to Kelly.
There's probably a bunch of Kellys out there
who would love it.
Kelly, Martha,
wants your support out there on Twitter. It's rough,
but I think you'll make it and I hope you have a wonderful holiday season.
Jenny Johnson, first time guests on the show. And I,
I think it went great. How do you feel, Jenny?
I feel good. I mean, I don't feel great about my math.
Yeah, but you kind of brought up some old yeah it's a little bit triggering for me because i know that was never
my thing and i was told there'd be no math but um no it was fun and i was pleasantly surprised that
martha and kenny's were on here too i didn't even know that well next time you come back i'll tell you right now that there's a zero to one
percent chance that there will be no math oh fantastic but that's a lot of math that you just
gave me so i just did another one that was very confusingly worded yeah on purpose but thank you
jenny would you like to plug anything uh yeah follow me on you know twitter and instagram jenny johnson high five hi number five um i'll be doing shows
in san jose january 28th through the 26th and 28th when does this come out by the way tonight
oh okay well then get tickets to uh my show at the hollywood improv this wednesday at 8 30 it's me and my buddy maddie fontana have
a show we a monthly show there so yeah come get tickets good people um yeah so come come see us
very good i am going to be doing as already mentioned the uh the big uh largo holiday spectacular eight guests of hanukkah on sunday
december 18th and uh doug lowe's movies is also coming to san diego san francisco i've got stand
up shows coming up in san francisco and irvine all that stuff can be found at douglowvesmovies.com. Thank you once again to my guests, Jenny Johnson, Kanice Mobley,
and Martha Kelly.
And as always,
that's very generous,
sir.
A half day off once the building is operational.
Thank you,
sir.
Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie.
Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky
There's no room in his heart for you
Cause Doug loves movies