Doug Loves Movies - Jillian Bell, Phil Lord, and Chris Miller Guest
Episode Date: July 15, 2014Doug welcomes actress Jillian Bell and filmmakers Phil Lord and Chris Miller to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/pri...vacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, skinny babies,
Sticky seats with 50-ass and hot-board kernels in his Jeep.
There's still not one that he won't see,
The Doug Loves Movies!
Hey everybody, my name is Doug and I love movies!
This is Doug Loves Movies!
That was pretty good.
Somebody on Twitter today was
disgusted
that people are not singing it,
they're just yelling it.
I was like, well, I'm not a singer either, so I can't
complain.
Doug Loves Movies! I was like, well, I'm not a singer either, so I can't complain. D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D Men in Blackfisher. King Ralph a dog day. Afternoon delight.
Sleep perfect murder by death.
Wish three amigos.
World's end of watch.
Men don't leaving Las Vegas food lodging. Pemberton, Canada!
Get ready!
I'll be doing stand-up this weekend
at the Pemberton Music Festival.
Yeah, I'm opening for OutKast
in a different part of the facility,
but still, I'm going on before them,
a day earlier than them,
but I am going on before OutKast
at the Pemberton Music Festival.
I think I'm also before Kendrick Lamar, maybe.
Come see me Saturday, 5.45 p.m.
in what they are calling the Laugh Camp.
Which that's, I don't know if I approve of that.
Who's going to willingly go into a Laugh Camp?
What are you going to do to us?
And at 420, you can probably see me outside the laugh camp.
San Diego.
Sweet home San Diego.
Doug Loves Movies is coming to the House of Blues
on Wednesday, July 23rd.
Kick off Comic-Con with me and my special guest.
Ann Arbor, Michigan.
This is a real head-scratcher.
I was supposed to do stand-up on July 28th
at the Ann Arbor Comedy Showcase,
but they are in the process of moving
to a new location, and construction is behind,
and the new place won't be done in time,
so I need a venue, Ann Arbor.
I'm coming on July 28th anyway.
Plans have already
been made, so I might as well do
a show. So I'll keep you posted
on what happens with that.
The prize bag tonight, as you can
see, is chock full of
pretty cool looking stuff.
I mean, it's
full of stuff.
Could be not cool,
but we've got a Doug Loves Movies
t-shirt, of course, a copy
of Gateway, Doug,
the apology note
that I got from Natasha Leggero
for her flaking on getting Doug with high last night.
She wrote, Doug, really
sorry about yesterday. Love, Natasha.
So you get that.
What am I gonna do with it? What are you gonna do with it? so you get that.
What am I going to do with it?
What are you going to do with it?
There's Gateway, Doug.
And then, oh, this is kind of cool.
No, it's not cool at all.
It's kind of disappointing.
I got VIP tickets to see Aladdin on Broadway.
And as part of your VIP package,
you get a framed picture of the guy who played Aladdin.
It's not signed by him.
His name's not even on it.
Because there'll be a new Aladdin.
Not Aladdin. He played the genie. I'm sorry.
Crazy new take on Aladdin Aladdin's fat
and the genie's a skinny young boy
so there's that
is in there
oh yeah
couple of hot dogs
from Pops
and then the rest of these things
give away
who the guests are.
I'm so excited about this episode of the show
because two of the people coming out here
are involved with two of my favorite movies this year.
And then the third was also in one of their movies
that's one of my favorites.
Just bring him out, Doug.
What are you doing?
Please give a big, warm welcome to the directors
and one of the stars of 22 Jump Street,
Chris Miller, Phil Lord, and Jillian Bell. Hey, you guys.
Hey.
There's a lot of people here.
You know, it's a small space, but they're crammed in this week.
I've been kind of hinting for a while that this was going to be a good one,
that they would be excited to see the people that were here.
And I'm patting myself on the back right now.
Right.
Because it all came together very nicely.
Let's start with giving a single solitary round of applause.
You know her from Workaholics and from Eastbound and Down
and, of course, 22 Jump Street, Jillian Bell, everybody.
Thank you.
So nice to meet you.
It's nice to meet you, too.
So nice of you to bring copies of Eastbound and Down,
the complete fourth and final season.
Are they serious about the final?
Are they still kind of?
They're done.
For sure?
They're done.
For sure-sies?
For sure-sies.
Okay.
If you say so.
And what's your crazy name on Twitter?
It's Jillian Del Toro.
Because you want to be married to Benicio Del Toro?
He's such a good,
he's like a great guy to settle down with.
Oh, yeah. Absolutely.
Yeah. Just go on vacation
when there's a full moon.
And you should be alright.
I'm single and ready to mingle with Benicio.
Call me.
Is that why that's your Twitter name?
It's such a long, stupid story.
We don't need to get into the story.
Yes, I was in love with Benicio Del Toro when I was 17.
Oh, all right.
Well, that was a good time.
And I've kept it through 30.
When he was mumbles and usual suspects?
Yeah, when he's like, what the fuck?
Yeah.
Yeah, so thank you for being here, and thank you for bringing that.
And Chris Lord and Phil Miller are here, you guys.
We're linked.
No.
We blended into one another.
Chris Miller, Phil Lord, the Lego movie.
These guys can vouch for me.
I have not.
I never shut up about that movie.
I never stop watching that movie.
Everything is awesome is never not in my head.
I'm sorry for that.
That's okay.
It's really, I love it.
It's on every flight that I fly on lately.
The way it was meant to be seen.
Yeah.
But I've seen it so much that even when it's far away,
I can just enjoy the voices and the kind of okay picture that they have.
Yeah, the vague flickering of the lights.
Delta westbound, that's the way we wanted it.
Yeah, I just like, who the fuck would leave their windows up
during the Lego movie?
Like, put your shades down, you bastards.
There's art happening.
But I love that movie so much.
And then 22 Jump Street comes along
and also fantastic
hilarious
I saw it, it's pretty good
this one, yeah her
I don't know man
she doesn't know?
I didn't see the end
I didn't either
I got like in the middle of the premiere. What happened? I didn't either. You know, I went.
I got like,
in the middle of the premiere,
I got nervous and I left.
And I got a chicken sandwich.
How was the chicken sandwich?
Wonderful.
Well, that's all I need to know.
Why did you get nervous?
I can't see our movies.
Oh, so the listeners know
this is Phil speaking now.
And why'd you get nervous?
I can't see the movie
in a big audience
of judgmental people. But weren't they super
into it? They were into it, but
if they're not laughing the whole
time, like continuously all the way
through, like not breathing,
if they don't expire at the
end.
I did hire an actress to sit right
next to you going, I'm not
sure, the entire time.
That was...
Real heavy sighs. Sorry about it.
It wasn't hard to find an actress that dumb
to just sit there and go, I don't
know. I'm not sure.
They're talking about dicks a lot.
Shouldn't you be dead
from the first scene?
Now wait, was that Lego Movie?
All of them.
There's not enough murder in the Lego movie,
first of all, you guys.
Is Lego 2 really a thing you guys are going to make?
It's really a thing, yeah.
It's on IMDb.
Yay!
We're breaking news.
The great Chris McKay is going to direct it,
but we are writing it and producing it.
Really?
It's true.
Do you have any ideas for the script?
We were commenced on it
on Monday.
I got a few title ideas I'd like to run by you.
I'd love to hear them.
Lego 2 The Reckoning?
Or Lego 2 Revenge
of the Kraken?
Crackle. Sorry, Crackle.
I like a Kraken.
Oh, bring a Kraken into it?le. Sorry, Crackle. Oh, yeah. I like a Kraken. Yeah, like a Flash crossover.
Yeah, why not?
We got Liam Neeson.
You guys are open to ideas.
I like that about you.
Yeah.
Pretty desperate over here.
What about Lego movie
on the move,
like Mannequin 2?
Oh, yeah.
Is that a possibility?
A strong possibility?
Like a movie on the rocks? Yeah. Yeah'm going to go with On the Rocks.
Yeah.
Yeah.
On the Rocks.
On the Rocks.
That was Arthur 2?
Yeah, exactly.
That's a fun game.
Everybody, of course, knows the Legend of Curly's Gold.
Yeah, of course.
That's great.
One of the great sequels of all time.
That's my favorite one.
Probably the best one, right?
It has two Jack Palance's in it.
Is that true?
He's twins in that one?
There's a good and a bad one.
Who was the other guy? Curly and...
Mo?
Did you guys know that some people,
and by some people I mean just one lady that I know,
thought that Liam Neeson
was the voice of Bad Cop and somebody else was the voice
of good cop. No! That's great!
Because Liam Neeson, it's so funny
hearing him be so cutesy and
Hey, buddy!
Oh, god damn, makes me
laugh every time.
I'm just gonna... It was such a
surreal experience to be in the booth
with him while he was doing that.
We were like, we can edit it.
You can just do all the bad cops and then all
the good cops. He's like, no, I want to switch.
I want to do it myself.
I have a certain set of skills.
One of them is quick voice changes.
Check it out.
Hey, buddy.
Hey.
So weird.
I just love also how violent
Bat Cop is to everything around.
He's just throwing fucking chairs as far as he can
throw them. It's violent,
but nobody gets hurt.
But
swippeting back to
Jump Street.
Jump Street number 22. I can't believe you guys. Great segue. Jump Street number 22.
I can't believe you guys.
I've only seen the 21 and 22.
Yeah.
No, the previous 20 are pretty forgettable.
All right.
You finally got into your groove after 20 of them.
Yeah.
It takes a while.
But for this new one, was there anything that you had to cut to avoid falling out of the R rating into the X territory?
Well, we did cut out in his undeleted scenes.
Rob Riggle's vagina.
Yeah.
You see his vagina in the deleted scenes?
Yeah.
When's that coming out?
I'm all anxious to see it.
I gotta see that Riggle vagina.
Yeah.
There's some things that are even not classy enough for us. I gotta see that wriggle vagina.
There's some things that are even not classy enough for us.
Right, I mean his dick
was clean off in the first one
that passed muster but you bring
a vagina into it. No way.
And then hey guys, so down.
One of those.
You guys had a couple dicks, right?
We had a couple dicks. We took all
the dicks and pussies out of this Jump Street.
There's actually almost no nudity in 22 Jump Street.
It made people sad.
Now dick is pussy free?
That should have been the ad campaign.
Should have really trumpeted that fact.
Don't you see Channing Tatum's butt at some point?
No.
Isn't that in his contracts?
I know.
You would think.
Doesn't he have to always show his butt
and everything he's in?
Honestly, we had a whole butt shoot,
like a day-long butt shoot
that we had to do just to appease him,
but we cut it all out.
A whole day of the entire crew
winking at each other.
Oh, yeah, no.
It's rolling, buddy.
It's great.
Should we reload the camera?
No, don't worry about it.
Guys, does my butt look good?
Is it lit right?
Why isn't the red light on?
I wasn't in that scene, but I showed up.
You showed up.
Supportive.
This should be a supportive co-star.
Good butt.
She's good.
Keep rolling.
Yeah.
Keep rolling.
Nice cut.
No, don't cut.
Don't cut.
Keep rolling.
That's your move.
No one will go to lunch.
Also in the prize bag, 22 Jump Street cups and balls for a beer pong, I assume.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And it's a pretty nice set of cup and balls.
But also, was this the overall slogan for the movie?
They're not 21 anymore?
Yeah.
He didn't think it made any sense.
It made no sense.
We had long
arguments. That's like if Jaws 2 came out
and the slogan was,
It's Not Jaws.
It's not about
Jaws anymore.
But those cups are super cool
and I guess a
slogan for the movie wasn't really, you didn't need one.
We always start with the slogan, and then write backwards from that.
So what was your chosen slogan for it?
We were pitching, it's always worse the second time around.
Oh, right.
It was hard to sell that.
The marketing department was less interested in the movie, saying the movie was bad.
Yeah.
Even though that joke is played quite well many the movie was bad. Yeah. Even though that joke
is played quite well
many times
during the film.
Yeah.
And then medium well
a few more times.
Yeah.
Is that,
do you really feel that way?
Do you feel like
you overdid that joke?
Or,
I was roaring at it
every time,
but I can't tell.
It's to taste.
It's to,
what I can't tell is if, when we added up all the ADR stuff,
that we just went over the line.
It's quite possible.
And I couldn't tell while we tested it, but at the end of the day,
while I was getting a chicken sandwich, we crossed the line.
And I'll never know.
Fair enough.
So sad, you guys.
No, it's not sad at all.
And also not sad
is this probably the most amazing
koozie.
It says, not only does it say
22 Jump Street on it, it's also got a
bottle opener built into it.
Whoa. I don't know if you
can hear everybody's gasp in the audience.
Yeah, thank you for adding
to it, Jillian.
It really
wasn't enough.
It wasn't sufficient. But check out
these, also, I've been told, three
different 22 Jump Street
posters. International. Including
the Russian poster
in which the title is
Macho and the Nerd 2.
For real.
So there's this one,
and it says they're not 21 anymore at the bottom.
I'm great at holding stuff.
You can just rip the bottom part off of it.
And then,
and here's that.
Another version of the poster for here.
Then the real, this is the piece.
I want to see this one.
Oh yeah, that's good.
Does anyone speak Russian?
I believe it
literally translates to
macho and the botanist.
For real.
Nerds in Russia are known as botanists. For real. Nerds in Russia
are known as botanists.
Yeah, which is slang for
nerd, we've been told.
I wonder
why their society
has not advanced very far.
They don't like
science. We play a game on this
show sometimes called Love,
Like, Hate, Love, Love Like or something like that.
it's basically we take the films
of famous people and we
just all discuss which ones we love and which ones we hate.
But I don't want to get
into hate with you guys
about this fella. So I'm just going to
ask you. Everyone gets to answer.
What's your favorite
Channing Tatum movie?
And you can't say one of the Jump Streets.
Mmm.
A Guide to Recognizing Your Saint.
Damn it! He's very good at that. Really?
I haven't even seen that one.
He's good at that. He's incredible in that movie.
It's a very dramatic movie
with Shia LaBeouf.
He's probably about 50-50 on drama and comedy,
right, in his overall career. He's been in some-50 on drama and comedy, right? In his overall career.
He's been in some dramatic stuff.
Clearly, he and Steven Soderbergh
are going to always do stuff together.
They seem to be compatible.
He's great.
Is that the one where he's having sex
with the girl in the stairwell?
And he licks his hand before insertion.
I like that you're doing it.
Yeah, I did it.
What does licking your hair look like?
How does that work exactly?
A lot of people don't know what that looks like,
so I like to demonstrate things for other people.
I do believe that is the movie.
Yeah, that's a really good, specific,
that's in touch.
Oh, you think that was his, he riffed that?
Oh, yeah.
It's like, this is how I would do it.
Improv, bitch.
Chan-prov.
Honesty.
That's just honesty.
That's Chan-provisation.
Chan-provisation.
It's true.
I'm going to say Step Up.
Yeah.
Original.
Step Up won.
He was in the first two, right?
He and Jenna fell in love during making that movie.
That's his real girl?
That's his real lady.
And they have a baby and whatnot.
I hope the baby's name is Step Up.
To the streets.
We named it after the movie where we met.
If we have a second baby, it'll be Step Up to the streets.
Do and Tatum.
Chris, did you answer the question?
Well, it's gonna be
the same one as Jillian
that's cool
actually you want to say
Foxcatcher which I haven't seen
but it's already my favorite
oh
I'm super pumped for that movie
that guy
Bennett Miller's a great director
he does good stuff that guy
Steve Carell just seems
crazy
creepy
he's a great character actor
like he's
you know
I think he's gonna really
be awesome in it
he's going places
that guy's gonna do alright
he's gonna be okay but I in it. He's going places. That guy's going to do all right.
He's going to do all right.
But I went with the Lego movie as my favorite.
Oh.
Tricky question.
Because he's Superman in that.
That's true.
Yeah.
All the superheroes in that movie are super funny.
And did you get a lot of weird pushback from the comics?
They were really upset that we cast Channing Tatum and Jonah Hill in the movie.
Two big stars
that worked basically for free.
That upset them.
There's some Green Lantern fans
who were not happy with the depiction
of him as maybe...
As a complete pussy, but you know.
Or not a pussy as much as just in love
with another man.
Yeah, you know.
It was a little too soon for them in Green Lantern.
Right, they'd just been through a really bad patch with Green Lantern.
And they were like, you know, I think Green Lantern isn't ready
for this kind of, yeah, of this kind of play.
But you got away with it anyway.
We did it anyway.
That's cool.
It's true.
The stuff with the Star Wars characters is hilarious, too.
Favorite Jonah Hill movie?
Jillian, go.
Oh, God.
You can pass.
I'll go with Superbad.
Oh, I love Superbad. I love Superbad.
I love any movie that takes place in one day.
Any movie.
Any movie.
Fucking Can't Hardly Wait.
I love it.
Are you kidding me?
Breakfast Club, of course.
Breakfast Club.
I'm in.
Dog Day Afternoon.
I haven't seen that.
Hilarious.
I've seen Can't Hardly Wait 25 times.
One of those times could have been Dog Day Afternoon.
Could have been, but it wasn't on.
They don't give it the same play they give Can't Hardly Wait.
It'd be great if Dog Day Afternoon was right next to Can't Hardly Wait in your DVD case.
No, I keep all my Ethan Embrys together.
Yeah, that's right.
Oh.
That guy's real wacky.
Do you follow him on, do you look at his vines?
Should I?
Yeah, yeah.
Okay.
Ethan Embry's got crazy vines.
What does he do?
He just makes these really, I don't know how he makes them.
It's kind of like Adam Goldberg makes crazy, complicated vines.
Like, I don't know how these guys do it.
Or why.
What's your favorite Jonah Hill movie, Phil?
This is the End.
Yes.
Good call.
The exorcism of Jonah Hill.
Nice.
My favorite part.
That movie is, like, a lot more intense than I bargained for.
I laugh,
but I also,
it's also like
kind of upsetting.
Yeah,
I thought about my life.
Yeah,
yeah,
yeah.
I felt bad about myself
afterwards.
Chris,
what do you think?
I'm going to go with Cyrus.
Cyrus is another
very interesting
with John C. Reilly.
his playing the piano
and staring at
John C. Reilly
is really very special. Yeah, he's intense. I, of course, piano and staring at John C. Reilly is really very special.
Yeah, he's intense. I, of course, went with the
Lego movie again.
Fair. That's fair.
Have you guys been to the
movies lately? Jillian, have you seen,
have you been to a theater or just watched something
on demand or something?
I saw 22 Jump
Street. That's the new movie
that was out.
I saw Neighbors.
I loved Neighbors.
Yeah, Neighbors
was a lot of fun.
I don't know
what else I've seen.
I'm probably watching
a lot of Can't Hardly Wait.
Have you guys seen that?
If you haven't seen it,
check it out.
It really opens up
after the 25th viewing.
Yeah.
Like a fine wine.
So many discoveries.
Yeah.
There's a lot of actors
in it that have
continued to work.
You know, like...
Right.
So you're looking
at acting
or other fields?
They just work somewhere.
Like at Brood's.
But I always...
At the Gap.
When you see an ensemble
movie with lots of people
though and lots of them
went on to more success
and then there's
that one person
that's like,
oh,
that guy never did
anything ever again.
I always just feel bad
for that person
watching the movie.
I can't think of
any good examples
right now.
I'm trying to think.
Is that the one
with the Shermanator
or is that a different one?
Shermanator, yeah.
Shermanator's in that one.
Like the dude
that gets the girl pregnant
in Fast Times
and the scalper guy.
He's the only one
in that movie
that's not still playing big parts in movies.
Right?
Right.
I'm sure he has a picture of Sean Penn with his eyes crossed out in his house.
Do you think him and Judge Reinhold are working on a screenplay together?
Let's get together.
Every day, man.
Two hours every day.
We made up chat.
It's elbow grease, dude.
Judge Reinhold had a good run, man. Two hours every day. We made a chat. It's elbow grease, dude. Judge Ryan hold out a good run, though.
He did.
He's in a handful of classics.
Banana in the Tailpipe?
Vice Versa with Fred Savage.
And Banana in the Tailpipe 2?
That was a good one?
That's seriously, Beverly Hills Cop 2,
Banana in the Tailpipe.
That's what they should have gone with.
Phil, I forgot to ask you what you wrought for the prize bag.
Oh, yeah.
These are just joke notes for right now.
But you actually have what people wrote after a... Yeah, well, I cleaned out my car.
A research screening.
It's a research screening.
I had my 39th birthday on Saturday
and I decided to turn over
a new leaf
and clean out my cards
I had not cleaned out
as it turned out
in five years
since the year 2009
from which this comes.
June 6, 2009.
Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs
recruited audience screening.
Kids age 12 and under.
These are the cards
that you fill out when you go to the thing.
They're amazing. Yeah, what are some of the better
comments you got from these
fucking kids? Yeah.
So they ask things like, which part
did you like the most? And in this case, which part
did you like the least? When she
was fat.
Why did you like the movie?
Colors.
One of the best reasons to go to the movies.
Here's a good one.
Why did you like the movie?
I liked the movie because it was partly funny.
If you didn't like the movie, why not?
I didn't like the movie because it wasn't
the kind of movie that I like.
That one's not even going to make it to 12.
Why did you like the movie, Giant Pancake?
Weirdly enough, that...
That's just what he wanted for lunch.
That's just...
Anyway, all these can be yours. Yeah, let's put all of those in the bag. That's just what he wanted for lunch.
Anyway, all these can be yours.
Yeah, let's put all of those in the bag.
I don't know what they're going to do with those,
but it's fun.
If you didn't like the movie, why not?
I did like the movie.
All it's missing at the end is dad jeez dad
I did like the movie dad
anyway
this could be a whole podcast you're just reading
especially the comment cards after you've been vindicated
like the movie was a hit
so let's go back and see what these stupid kids
dumbasses
stupid kids
Why did you like the movie?
It's funny and sad.
Like life.
I wish one just said
I don't know, I'm a fucking kid.
Why are you asking me?
Get off my back.
Make your movie adult. I want to go
play.
Anyway. Alright, let's throw those in the bag
and let's also start
the game portion of the show.
Oh, no.
Did anybody bring, did you guys bring some name tags?
Do we have some fun, oh, looks like some
fun ones out there. So you guys
pick who you want to play for.
Just go physically grab the name tag from them and bring it back to your seat.
And while you do that, we'll do this.
We'll be right back after this message from my mouth.
And we're back.
Who are you guys playing for?
Jillian, what is this, a Pepe Le Pew tribute?
It is.
I just like that it said worst name tag ever, Pepe.
And then there was Pepe Le Pew
on it. Or just a skunk.
It might just be. I don't even think that's
Pepe Le Pew. I don't think that's Pepe Le Pew.
That's a fucking knockoff skunk.
It is the worst name tag
ever. I think it really is.
It's a rando skunk. This is
Creepy Le Fou.
What about you, Phil?
Who do you got?
Tuxy.
You just used your beer as a microphone.
Now I see why it takes two of you to direct.
What is that?
A taxi driver.
It's a screwdriver.
Uh-huh.
It's directed by... A Martin Scorsese sort of tribute.
Mark Tool, screw Sasey.
That's just clever.
That's a nested pun.
That's really...
There's a lot going on.
This is more about effort.
And it also just looks like it's a fun thing for you to hold.
Yeah, I like it.
It's a volume system.
I'm going to use this as a microphone later.
Okay.
Get ready.
It's weapon-esque.
And I like what Chris chose.
I like it already.
Look at that.
Blazing chattels.
My friend chattel is going to be...
Someone named chattel?
Yeah, or blaze. Chattel is going to be...
Yeah, or Blaze.
Chattel's the last name?
He's actually named Brooks.
And he just added the C for no reason.
Weird.
But yeah, that's a cool Blazing Saddles poster.
I always liked that poster.
All right.
Let's play the Lettermon game.
Yeah.
I'm so nervous.
Me too.
Me three.
Don't.
If it makes you feel any better,
my phone is almost out of power.
This game could end in a second.
Maybe you should turn on Waze.
We have to play a speed game.
Turn on a map or something.
Really drain the juice.
Yeah.
Now that you mention it, I should probably close a couple things.
Oh, shit.
Yeah, drain it less.
Sorry, guys.
This is entertaining for an audience.
Somebody has to win today
Because the prize bag is too great
So you guys just do your best
And one of these three name tags
Is going to go home with all this stuff
And
To decide who goes first
Holy shit we really are behind
I can't believe it's already
This late in the show and I'm already saying this
But to decide who goes
first in the Leonard Maltin game, we're going to do
a round of doing lines with Mark.
Yeah!
You guys want to do some lines?
Let's fucking do some lines!
Let's talk. We got some time?
I want to talk about some shit.
Yes! That is very convincing hair. Let's talk. We got some time? I want to talk about some shit. Yes.
That is very convincing hair.
Mark Wahlberg is
nice enough to come by
and do the show.
Maybe you can call a dude back.
He comes in almost...
Uh... You a fan of Jillian's work there? All of it. almost.
You a fan of Jillian's work there?
All of it.
All of it?
All of it.
Are you kidding me right now?
What's your favorite
if you had to name one thing?
That Workaholics episode
with the pink dress.
Like the pink shirt
you were wearing.
The onesie?
It was like a blouse.
Yeah, you looked so good in that.
It went all the way down
to your feet
and covered them.
Mark doesn't like to see feet.
I don't believe in ugly things. Look at me.
Alright, so Mark's going to say a line from a motion picture.
As only Mark can do it.
And then the first person who can name the movie
that it's from
will go first
and let our mom guess.
This is a 15-minute scene.
Here we go.
Just jump in
as soon as you know it,
you guys.
Okay.
Just yell it
into your beer can.
Oh, hey.
Oh, hey.
Look.
It's Korean Jesus.
21 Jump Street. Look. It's Korean Jesus.
21 Jump Street.
You sure are an embarrassment to yourself.
Oh, hey.
22 Jump Street!
It is 22 Jump Street!
How you doing?
Good, right?
Leave me out here, bro.
I'll talk to you later, okay?
Okay.
I didn't understand that it was going to be so easy.
I know. I would have guessed that if I thought it was a possibility. Do you have another one, Mark? Mark, do you later, okay? Okay. I didn't understand that it was going to be so easy. I know.
I would have guessed that
if I thought it was a possibility.
Do you have another one, Mark?
Mark, do you have another one?
There was another movie
with Korean Jesus?
Well, you guessed wrong.
You guessed wrong the first time,
so we've got to try again.
You can enjoy it.
Try one more.
Okay, you ready for this? Yeah. Or is that part of it? No, it is not part of it. Okay, here ready for this?
Yeah.
Or is that part of it?
No, it is not part of it.
Okay, here we go.
Where we're going?
We don't need roads.
Back to the future?
Nope, 21 Jump Street.
Yes, it is Back to the Future.
All right, Chris got in first that time.
Dude, I need my mic cord, bro.
What's the matter?
We're good.
I was on his mic cord.
Just a text, Jillian, just a text.
All right, Chris, you get to pick category in the letter mall game,
and then we will go to Phil and then to Jillian, All right, Chris, you get to pick category in the Leonard Maltin game,
and then we will go to Phil and then to Jillian,
and you guys will figure it out as we go.
I'll talk you through it.
When all three players have never played before,
it's an even playing field.
It'll be great.
It's always great when no one knows how to play the game.
V for Viagra.
That's movies that are more than three hours long.
Or, celebrating your birthday today,
the great Forrest Whitaker.
Forrest Whitaker turned something today.
And so the films of
Forrest Whitaker.
How would you spell Forrest if you were just going to guess?
Two R's. Just the one.
So Chris Miller has
negative one. Minus one.
Phil and Jillian are in the lead.
I was counting the R in Whitaker also.
At the end of Whitaker was
the second R that I was referring to.
You are correct and now you have three points.
Plus three.
Now everybody's got zero.
Or, and the Supremes on Twitter suggested
Premium Rush, and that's Jeffrey Rush movies
that Leonard Maltin gave three stars or more.
Yeah, we're talking real Premium Rush here.
Which one of those do you like?
The Three Hours Long, Forrest Whitaker, or Jeffrey Rush?
I'm going to go with Three Hours Long.
All right.
Would you like a movie that's over three hours long from 1984 or 2005?
Let's go with 2005.
More recent.
Smart move.
Three and a half stars from Leonard.
He says this movie takes place during
the Depression.
He also says about this movie
that
it won three Oscars.
And
one more thing.
Just one more thing.
Oh, the movie has one of the characters in the movie is a screenwriter.
And Leonard lists nine names.
How many names, reading from the bottom up,
do you think it will take you to discern the title of this movie, Chris Miller?
He gets to make the first bid.
I'm bidding, out of nine names,
six.
Six?
All right.
You go from the bottom?
That's a smart, yeah.
So he's going to not hear the top three billed people.
He's going to get six of them.
If you ask him to name that movie,
then if he fails to name it, you will get the point.
But you could bid lower.
You could say five names?
Four?
I'm saying five.
Alright, now we go to Jillian.
I'm so, so bummed.
We move away from Chris. Cool question here. And Jillian needs to go.
You can either ask him to name it, or
you can bid even a lower amount
of names. If you don't even know
what the movie is, what do you bid?
I'd ask him to name it.
Oh. And then if he names the movie?
If he fails, you'll get a point.
If he gets it, he gets a point.
Oh. Four.
Wow.
Reverse psychology.
It did not go the way I expected it to go.
Reverse psychology.
You really faked us out there.
It's tricky.
You don't know what a movie is.
No competitive advantage for yourself.
So now Chris.
I'm going to say Jillian, name that movie.
All right.
Nice.
You didn't think that was going to happen?
It's so embarrassing for the three of us that we don't even have a clue.
I have an idea, but I'm not confident.
All right. So how many names do you get?
Four?
Is that right?
Four?
Yeah.
Okay, here's your four names.
It won three Oscars, three and a half stars from Leonard.
It's over three hours long, takes place during the Depression,
and one of the characters is a screenwriter.
And your four names are,
and audience, don't make too many gasping noises when you figure out
what this is raise your hand right now if you already know what it is i hope it's everyone
this guy thinks he knows uh kyle chandler jamie bell no relation evan park and andy circus and Andy Serkis from 2005.
Now raise your hands if you know it.
See how that changed?
I raised my hand, but I don't really know it.
I'm just trying to psych out, Jillian.
I think I know it.
What do you think it is, Jillian?
Name a movie that when you saw it,
you were like, that was too long.
From around 2005.
Oh my gosh.
How long are the Jump Streets?
Like 150?
Yeah.
A little under two.
About right, yeah.
You didn't go crazy with that two-hour comedy nonsense.
No, no, no.
It's got to be under.
Oh, it's got to start with a one.
For sure.
So if I have zero guests, I just name a movie?
Should I pass?
You might as well.
If you name a long-ass movie, maybe you'll be right.
It's not going to be this, but Saving Private Ryan?
I don't even think that's longer than three hours, though.
Do you remember that Andy Serkis motion capture character that he did?
No.
That's all he does.
It sort of gives it away that Andy Serkis is in it
because he's always
portraying some sort of
animal or creature
or something.
You can do it now.
I don't...
Still can't do it.
Now you can do it.
Starts with a K?
Two Ks?
Two Ks?
But not three Ks.
Nope.
It's not racist.
It's King Kong.
Oh, Jesus.
Yeah, yeah. The depression plus Oscar thing
Really throws you off
It makes you think it's really serious
I was like road to perdition
So Chris you asked her to name it
I did
So you get a point
By not knowing
We share that point
We do?
Yeah you and I share it contractually.
We share that point.
That's a good point.
That's half a point for Chris, half a point for Phil.
Partners!
Jillian, if you could have anyone from 22 Jump Street
as your partner in this game, who would you pick?
Can I pick the Lucas Brothers as one?
Okay.
How'd you find those guys?
They're hilarious.
They're stand-ups out of New York.
And actually, our friend Rodney Rothman,
who was one of the writers on the movie,
introduced us to them.
We were searching for twins.
You'd already come up with the idea of having twins.
Yes.
But Jillian auditioned for their part.
I did audition for their part.
You did?
We auditioned for their part.
That's how desperate we were.
Yeah, we were going to use
the split screen technology
that they invented.
We were going to spend
millions of dollars
to turn you into a figure.
We're going to Winklevoss her.
She's going to get Winklevossed.
I was like,
give me any role, please.
Please.
So then they settled
for the role that was
more appropriate for you?
I guess.
Yeah, yeah.
The villain.
That worked out great.
All right, so Phil gets to go first this time,
and then we go to Chris and then to Jillian,
and Phil gets to pick between
Deep Fried Bacon,
and that's movies where Kevin Bacon smokes weed.
Okay?
Someone named AtWatleyDude,
remember Jody Watley?
WatleyDude,
suggested Specific Rim, Someone named at Watley Dude, remember Jody Watley? Watley Dude, suggested
Specific Rim,
and that's
movies about basketball.
And at U.S.
Crascal, C-R-R-U-S-C
Rascal.
Crascal suggested
Bring Me the Craggle suggested bring me the craggle
suggested Halificent
Halificent and that of course
is movies with evil computers
and
it's still not completely settled but I think
I think Weird Al was right
that Tron is more about a video
game than a computer
well the master control program is evil right a video game than a computer. Well, the Master Control Program is evil.
Right.
See, he's still a program.
Yeah.
So, yeah.
So we had a little...
Al and I, you know, we went outside and settled it like men.
By looking it up on the internet?
No, by just strapping on our accordions and having a jam session.
I listened to his new album, Mandatory Fun, today,
and it's amazing like all of them.
He's still got it.
Which category would you like, Phil?
Evil Computers.
All right.
Hopefully I picked actual Evil Computers this time.
1977 or 1995?
Oh.
Yeah.
77. Jesus. 77.
Hmm.
Jesus.
I don't know.
Three and a half stars from Leonard.
Oh, shit.
He calls this movie intelligent,
provocatively written,
and as riveting as it is bizarre.
Yeah.
And he names five people.
That's all you get? That's all you get. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah. And he names five people. That's all you get?
That's all you get. Interesting.
Yeah. I don't even know if there may not
have been more than five people. Three and a half stars.
Three and a half, yeah. He really liked it.
Computer.
It's obviously not Star Wars.
Is computer distinct from robot?
Oh.
Uh-oh.
Computer distinct from robot.
Oh.
Uh-oh.
Let's call it a computer robot.
Okay.
Maybe.
Because it might be a robot.
It's a robot, maybe.
Sure.
I mean, all evil computer movies have some sort of something that has to carry out their vision. Right.
It can't just email you and murder you.
No, but that would be extra terrifying.
You've got mail.
That's what that was about.
I didn't see it,
but I heard that
that's what that was about.
I can name that
in three actors.
Now it's on you.
No, it goes to Chris.
No, it goes to me.
I'm going to say
and name that movie
Phil Waller.
I don't even know
if I can name it in three actors. I'm going to say and name that movie Phil Waller. I don't even know if I can name it
in three actors.
I'm really just...
All right.
But that question
you asked me
makes me feel like
you kind of might be
in the right ballpark.
Yeah.
The three names
and you're really
going to wish
you'd heard the top two.
Are Lisa Liu, L-U,
so it's not the Lisa Lou we know
from Charlie's Angels and whatnot?
Lucy Lou.
Lucy Lou.
Lucy Lou.
It's not Lucy Lou, is my point.
Both names are spelled differently.
The first and last name are different.
They're both different.
It's also not Ed Asner.
Barry Kroger, who I do not know
if he's associated
with the grocery store chain
or with fruit.
And Garrett Graham.
Do you know who Garrett Graham is?
It elucidates everything.
No?
I got nothing.
He's an interesting actor.
How many people
know the answer to this?
I bet you hardly anybody.
This is a tough one.
This is a really tough one.
Oh, I'm boned.
But I did like your question.
Oh, yeah, you guys.
Westworld?
That's a terrific guess.
That's a good guess.
Both Westworld and the original,
or the sequel, Future World,
both would qualify for evil robots
and evil computers.
But the top two names are
Fritz Weaver and Julie Christie.
And Julie Christie gets raped by a computer or a robot in The Demon Seed.
The Demon Seed.
Obvious.
So obvious.
I knew it, but I wanted to put it on the spot.
You went 77 because you were thinking maybe it was around Westworld time?
I don't know.
I just couldn't think of anything in 95.
What was the 95 one?
No, let's have fun with it.
One and a half stars.
This movie from
1995. Leonard says
it's in the near future.
He also says
that it's ugly
to say the least.
Although it's built on a foundation
of some interesting ideas.
Interesting ideas,
which is ugliness piled on.
And then he lists, uh,
12 names?
No, 10 names, 10 names.
10 names.
I can name that film in 11 names.
If you name all the names and then the title is the last name?
Correct.
The name of the film.
Let's see if this rings any bells for anybody.
Apologies to put your hands together.
We're almost done.
Tracy Lourdes is the 10th billed person in this movie.
Oh.
Does that help?
No.
You know who else is in this movie?
The great William Fichtner.
Yeah. Louise Fletcher is in this movie? The great William Fichtner. Yeah.
Louise Fletcher is in it.
Russell Crowe is in it.
What?
Russell Crowe?
And the lead actor
is Denzel Washington.
95?
It's called Virtuosity.
I think Russell Crowe is the evil robot computer person. 95? It's called Virtuosity. Oh!
I think Russell Crowe is the evil robot computer person.
Yeah, yeah.
I was hoping it would be The Net.
I wake up
every day hoping it's going to be The Net.
Well, Chris Miller
is our winner, everybody.
Woo!
Double birds.
So Blazing Chattels,
come get your prize bag
wherever you are.
There you are up there.
Blazing Chattels.
There's your bag
and you can grab those posters.
Don't forget these.
These valuable notes
from the children.
There might be some mold on it.
It's been there a long time.
Don't let those fall into the wrong hands.
We don't need the government knowing how children
feel about meatballs.
And does that screw thing, does it have a shithead on the back
or is that too hard to accomplish on that?
We don't need his because he won.
He doesn't have a voice.
I can't tell unless I gave it away by saying, no, I don't think
Martul scores.
No, I don't think that was it.
Can this guy come up here and write down a shithead for me?
I assume it's a guy.
Right? Where is he?
Yeah, come on over. Come on up here.
Can write down a shithead.
And we have Pepe put a shithead
on the back of his.
Interesting one.
Yeah, he drew it out for us.
Alright, here comes the guy.
Is he taking a piss on something?
Here you go.
Just write down anybody you want me to call a shithead.
This looks like how a child draws a heart.
Yeah, yeah.
You made a name tag, but you had no idea why?
Okay, alright. I want to win a heart. Yeah, yeah. You made a name tag, but you had no idea why? Okay.
All right.
I had to win a prize.
Oh, okay.
Somebody told you you had to have a name tag to win a prize?
Yeah.
Okay.
Well, here's your name tag back.
That's your prize.
And thank you to my guests.
Let's hear it for them one more time.
Chris Miller, Phil Lord, and Jillian Bell.
Jillian, you got,
what's your next thing we could see you in?
More Workaholics?
More Workaholics.
What else?
I've got a new show on Comedy Central
coming out called Idiot Sitter,
which was a web series first.
Thank you, a couple of claps.
Thank you. Yeah, of claps. Thank you.
Yeah, that'll be coming out
in about a year probably.
Oh, okay. Well, maybe
you can come back sometime before then.
Thank you. I would love to.
And guys, Lego 2
and what else? We're making a TV
show with Will Forte called
The Last Man on Earth.
So you guys are directing the pilot of that?
We're directing the first few episodes.
Okay, and you guys directed the pilot of Brooklyn Nine-Nine.
That should also be mentioned.
Fucking great work.
Keep it up.
Thank you for being here.
Thank you, audience.
Thank you, UCB.
We'll be back here in three weeks.
And as always,
creepy mic stands are a shithead.
Oh, Pepe.
I want to know more about this person.
What makes him tick?
And Godzilla is a shithead.
Woo!