Doug Loves Movies - Jimmy O. Yang, Geoff Tate, Dan Van Kirk and Chad Opitz guest
Episode Date: November 4, 2019Live from Cobb's Comedy Club in San Francisco, Doug welcomes Jimmy O. Yang, Geoff Tate, Dan Van Kirk and Chad Opitz to the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on Stitche...r Premium. For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming babies, sticky seeds
With 50 azipop or kernels in his teeth
There's still not one that he won't see
Cause Doug loves movies Hey, hey, hey, everybody.
My name is Doug, and I love movies.
This is Ives Movies.
Scary Movies Edition.
Are you guys sick of Halloween yet?
No.
Good, because we're going to talk about scary movies.
And I looked at the stage earlier, and I was like,
yeah, I've got three guests.
That looks perfect.
And there's four chairs
and four mics up here.
So I guess somebody
didn't get some memo.
And hopefully there's
a fourth person backstage
who wouldn't mind
coming out here
when I introduce everybody.
He probably didn't bring
anything for the prize bag,
though, so we'll see
how that works out.
See, it's already a really spooky episode of the show.
Of course, it's Saturday, November 2nd, 2019.
Don't forget to set your cocks back.
Don't forget to put your cocks between your legs
and be a lady for the next six months.
Ladies too.
If I say name tags three times, will they appear?
Name tags, name tags, name tags.
Oh, man.
Those are some big ones.
Your name is Bo.
B-E-A-U.
So you went with Rambo.
I like it.
And Cannibal Holocaust.
What's your name?
Bill?
Oh, Cannabil.
I can't see it because there were signs of drooping over there.
But Cannabil.
Very good job.
And then, you gotta love anybody that just
takes a poster,
crosses out a couple of
letters.
Jamie, would you mind showing the whole audience
here? Turn around and show everybody
the brilliance.
I mean, that, I really hope your name tag gets chosen.
It probably won't, but, and you also score extra points with me for wearing a Getting
Done With High t-shirt, so thank you for, thank you for having that.
Genmini-Eye Man?
Your name's Jennifer? It's Genmini-I-Man? Your name is Jennifer?
It's Genmini-Man.
But it's a very beautiful poster,
and when you get home, you can just go ahead
and put those lights back on the tree.
What's that one about summer?
Yeah.
I want to know what you did last summer. What's that one about summer? Yeah.
I wanna know what you did last summer.
Ivana know.
Because your name's Vana?
Ivana.
Ivana know what you did last summer.
It makes perfect sense.
I'm the idiot. I'm the idiot.
And there's a poster back there for Evil Dead,
so that's on theme.
But what's your name?
Ed.
Evil Ed.
Oh, and there's 28 Days Later.
What does that say?
28 Days Cater.
28 Days Cater.
Wow, the license you guys are taking with the concept of a pun.
The Ikaika bin in the woods? Your name's Ikaika? Ikaika? So instead of cabin, it's
so instead of cabin it's
e-kikabin
the e-kikabin in the woods
I mean it's beautiful
it's got lots of little ornaments
that are pumpkin faced
and some various candies
that look pretty good
are those Swedish fish?
can you peel those off and just toss them to me?
I want to get those before...
Because that name tag is going to get picked, I think.
I have a good feeling about it.
If it's candy, I can catch it.
If he'd have thrown a baseball...
I would have batted it to the ground.
But great job with the name tags in general.
And I understand those of you who didn't make name tags.
Because what a week this has been.
Holy shit.
So much Halloween.
Oh, are there any costumes?
Anybody wear costumes?
No?
Okay, perfect.
There's a guy in a shirt over there that simulates a skeleton.
It's supposed to be Donnie Darko?
Oh, you don't have the hood up.
Okay, here it goes.
Look at that.
See, he is.
He's wearing a costume.
You can wear that costume anywhere.
There's no places that...
Well, I guess some places would say you can't wear a hoodie.
It's like a nightclub that's racist.
Racist against skeleton men from Donnie Darko.
Doug plugs!
We're back to regular Doug Loves Movies next Saturday, November 9th
at Wise Guys in Salt Lake City at 420.
November 16th at the Improv in San Jose at 420. November 16th at the Improv in San Jose
at 420.
Yeah, come on down for that.
And the Miami Improv on Saturday,
November 23rd.
Drive on down for that.
And of course it's at, you guessed it,
420.
And looking into December,
DLM returns to the Neptune in Seattle
on Monday, December 16th at 8 o'clock.
For tickets to that one, go to
stgpresents.com.
I brought a prize bag
full of prizes, including
the winner today is going to get
for free a Doug Love's
Scary Movies commemorative poster
made by my friend
Vox Brown out of Philadelphia.
And we got a few of those to sell after the show
if you want to stop by and get one at the merch table.
I brought, I just, the last show was in Sacramento,
so I brought a copy of Sacramento Guest and Resource Guide.
Did you guys know it was America's farm-to-fork capital?
That just sounds like somebody on The Good Place said something really dirty.
And I got some from Magical Butter,
some silicone spatulas for all of your, you know, weed food needs.
From Wise Choice Tattoo Removal in Denver, Colorado.
I've got a little owl.
Get it? Wise Choice Owl.
And it's an owl you squeeze when you're getting your tattoo removed.
Because it's so terribly, terribly painful.
And a Doug Loves Movies t-shirt.
And we're getting down to the last few of this batch
of these. In fact, there's not one in here. But I'll get my hands, if the winner comes up to me
afterwards, I'll get my hands on one for you. A Doug Benson pin from rockandpins.com. And hey,
rockandpins.com.
And,
hey,
Dee,
could you see if C wants to participate?
We've got an extra chair.
Yeah, just run it by him
real quick.
All of that stuff
is in the prize bag
and the stuff
brought by
my guests today.
You ready to bring them
out here?
I'm going to scoot down
just a little bit. I didn't notice
how close together all the chairs were,
so I recommend that everybody
scooch down a little bit once they get out here.
But please give it up,
everybody, for Jimmy O. Yang,
Jeff Tate, Chad Opitz,
and Dan Van Kirk.
You guys can scooch apart a little bit if you're too close together.
I've already moved a little bit over here.
There we go.
All right, awesome.
Let's meet them individually, starting with a first-time guest on the show.
I'm so happy he's here.
Jimmy O. Yang, everybody. Hey, everybody.
How's it going?
Headlining this weekend right here at Cobb's Yeah, so it's
I'm just going to stay here afterwards
Yeah, just hang out in the green room
Get a nice hot box effect going
You'll get a second hand high from all the activity up there
My stony friends
I'm kind of bummed because I would love to
smoke weed with all of you guys but I got two shows
to do tonight so I gotta be somewhat
functional you know
yeah I used to say that and then
people just assume I'm high
anyway so I might as well
be high
I mean I'm gonna say dumb shit either
way so let's do this but so excited be high. I mean, I'm going to say dumb shit either way,
so let's do this.
But so excited
that you're here and that
it's sad that it's
the final season, but Silicon Valley
is back for its
finishing run.
It started last Sunday,
yes? Sunday's on HBO?
Yeah, and tomorrow's the second episode of last season. Yes, Sunday's on HBO. Yeah, and tomorrow's
the second episode
of last season.
I think there's only
seven episodes total.
So enjoy it.
It's going to be good.
It's going to be good.
Like we ended it
how we wanted it to end it
instead of like getting canceled
or the show just died on its own.
So it's very good.
I think you guys,
you guys should enjoy it.
You want to throw out any spoilers
that could get you in trouble?
One of the dragons
die in the
fifth episode.
You are screwed, dude. HBO does not
care for that.
They want all the dragons to live
on all of their ships.
That'd be so funny if they want all the dragons to live on all of their ships. That would be so funny
if they just started
adding dragons to everything.
That was what people liked
about Game of Thrones.
HBO.
Not the violence,
not the sex.
They like those dragons.
I mean, there's whole episodes
where they just talk
about the dragons.
You never see them, right?
Yeah.
It's a little late for me
to start attacking Game of Thrones.
I've got a bone to pick with that series.
I mean, in fairness, they don't show any dragons on Silicon Valley either.
That's true.
Well, I mean, didn't Benioff and...
Well, Jeff just won the highest of them all prize with that comment.
I mean, it seems pretty accurate.
I don't know why all these
motherfuckers stonewalled me on it.
Also joining us today,
because he was in the green room, and we had an
extra chair on stage, and that's my
idea of a solution, instead of getting
rid of the extra chair
just make somebody else be a last minute guest it's chad opitz everybody
hi chad i will say this uh before we get started that if you win any of the games today i would
like you to uh immediately do a victory, if you know what I'm saying.
Okay, sure, sure.
Yeah.
Now I know why I'm here, Doug.
People will.
Well, I was going to make you do that from the audience if you were just hanging out in the audience.
It's going to happen.
I mean, unless you say no, you know.
Oh, no, of course not.
I'm not saying no to that.
I'm not going to force you.
See, I was sitting over there, and then you said, you're going to be up here.
And I was like, oh, my God.
I didn't even bring any gifts or nothing. Well, that you. I can't. See, I was sitting over there, and then you said, you're going to be up here. And I was like, oh, my God. I didn't even bring any gifts or nothing.
Well, that's what I was thinking.
What would you come up with for the prize bag just off of your person?
They have some joke.
Pound of flesh.
I got joke notes.
There you go.
That's a great prize.
Are they allowed to go ahead and start their career with those jerks?
Absolutely.
Here's one.
Boba T. Sperm Bank. Oh, those are my shirts. Absolutely. Here's one. Boba Tea Sperm Bank.
Oh, those are my jokes. Sorry.
Oh, no.
That's where he lied to you about Jimmy's jokes.
You can't be doing no Boba
Tea jokes next to an Asian comic.
Treading.
Treading on your territory. Fuck.
I think everybody was thinking
a wallet was about to come out, not a
pile of papers. i ain't got that
kind of money i don't know what about the others i got a library card or something are those glasses
prescription they are okay so you can't give those away uh oh man t-shirt i am not wearing a t-shirt
she doesn't have a t-shirt out over there, man. Yeah. She's just trying to see
what's under there.
Oh, Lord, God.
Well, it's like a hair shirt,
basically, so, yeah.
How about two tickets
to one of your upcoming appearances
here in the Bay Area?
That sounds...
I'll see what I can do.
I don't know.
I'll talk to the booker
and be like,
Doug said it was okay.
They will. I'll just, I'll strong arm be like, Doug said it was okay. They will.
I'll just strong arm them into it.
With my powerful influence.
Because everybody's got to bring something for their prize bag
even when they're called up last minute.
Okay, I'll do that.
All right.
One ticket, you know?
The winner's probably going to be some loner anyway.
ticket, you know? The winner's probably going to be some loaner anyway.
So...
Jeff, are you laughing at the contents
of that magazine or what's being said on the
stage? I was laughing at what you
said. Okay, cool. That's Jeff
Tate, everybody!
Not bad.
Not bad, San Francisco.
It was better than the last show.
Plus also, the great Tate got taken.
I don't know if you've heard the last show from Sacramento,
but Jeff did not win.
I know. Can you believe it?
Spoiler if you listen to this shit out of order.
But what do you think today your chances are?
You think you're here for a comeback?
Yeah, about the same.
My chances are pretty good.
Oh, fuck.
I make tribute.
Is that how they say it?
I pay tribute. Are you playing they say it? I pay tribute.
Are you playing the game today
for your little brother so he won't be killed?
Yeah.
I stand tribute for Troy.
Good movie reference, Jeff.
Also books.
Yeah, books.
And Dan Van Kirk is here! Hello. also books. Yeah, books.
And Dan Van Kirk is here!
Hello.
We've got a drink down on the floor, I'm afraid.
Whoa.
Yeah.
Well, I'm sorry. Can we get a new Tito's and Soda
and maybe put a sippy cup lid on the next one?
Wouldn't hurt.
Yeah.
Or maybe we should get another stool out here that you could put your drink on instead of how you put it on the floor.
I know.
I could have not sat down and he could have put his drink here.
Oh, see, that would have been the ultimate solution.
I have.
To not have an extra guest, just have an extra spot for drinks.
Sorry, cops.
Once he gets a new one, maybe he'll put it on you, Chad.
What's going on, Dan?
I hear you've got some sort of thing to promote.
I do.
My first comedy album is coming out November 15th.
It is called Thanks, Diane.
And when you are hearing this,
if you go to DanielVanKirk.com,
you can pre-order it right now
or go straight to the iTunes app store.
The iTunes store app, maybe.
On your phone.
And you can get Thanks, Diane.
When you do that, you'll get a track from the album right away called Don't Be a Dick.
And, yeah, the album comes out 11-15 on all streaming platforms.
And it's called Thanks, Diane.
I would appreciate it if you picked it up.
That's it.
I would appreciate it if you picked it up.
That's it.
Now, is it called Thanks Diane because you're a psychic and you know the one person that's going to buy it?
Yes, exactly.
Thanks, Diane.
Oh, that's good.
You knocked over the plastic one, so now let's give him one in glass.
Right.
Got a little more heft to it.
Oh, that's probably why, yeah.
My mom's name is Diane, so it's a thanks to her,
but it means a little something else when you listen to the track as well,
which is a track on the album called Thanks, Diane.
It's somebody you got it on with, isn't it?
What?
Nothing.
Jeff, you had something to say?
Yeah, your mom was going to buy it anyway.
You didn't have to name check her.
You never know.
I'm trying to guarantee one sale.
I mean, if every Diane bought it, you'd be fucking set.
Yeah, it'd be really popular between women 42 to 72 years old.
Hey, there's no young women named Diane.
Come on, do you know a young Gary?
Oh, look at this.
Thank you so much.
Thank you so much.
Cops, cops, cops, cops.
Cops, cops, cops, cops.
That just sounds like cops.
That sounds like the weirdest meeting ever.
It's cheerless chant cops.
What do you have for the prize bag, Dan?
I brought some special candy.
I brought some Harry Potter Bertie Botts beans.
And a chocolate Albus Dumbledore magic wand as well.
So these will go into the prize bag.
What were you doing?
Trying to meet some children again?
Yes.
Wizard spell sheet included.
Yeah.
So scare some religious people
in the South.
So were you at Harry Potter Land?
No.
I did the Red Clay Comedy Festival
and these were in the...
Shout out to the Red Clay Comedy Festival.
These were in the gift bags or to the Red Clay Comedy Festival, these were in the
gift bags, or the thank you bags for doing
the festival, and I held onto it, because I'm like,
I know a place where this would go well.
I brought it for you.
These are
perfect gifts. The rest
of my guests can just give up.
Yes!
What are you got, Chad?
Chad might get you into one of his shows
At the very least he'll hang out with you for a few minutes
I'll let you touch my beard
I got three free tickets to an upcoming show
Fuck yeah
I don't know
Three
I'll figure it out
Three
So the winner has to make two friends now?
I don't know, man.
That's very unfair.
Cut to the winner getting their tickets,
turning around and being like,
who needs two?
Who needs two?
I got two.
What do you think makes them,
they're just going to be like,
who needs three?
Yeah, why not?
I got three.
I got three tickets.
They're here by themselves.
They could probably use the dough.
It's San Francisco.
It's true.
It really is.
Jimmy, what do you have in your pocket for the occasion?
Unlike my friend next to me, I came prepared.
You knew you were going to be on the show?
Not to be too stereotypical,
but I was eating lunch at Chinatown today
and I saw
this beautiful pipe, probably
for opium, not sure.
But I'm like, you know, it's perfect
for Doug's crowds, right? Like, you want to give it a shot?
There you go. That hits.
It's for opium.
Yeah.
So one opium pipe from me.
I love it.
Yeah.
I mean, added value now that Jeff tested it.
Yeah.
And what did you bring, Jeff?
I brought, to start with,
I brought the Entertainment Weekly's
Fall TV preview.
Doug loves Fall TV.
Read it already.
I already know it all.
Don't need it anymore.
Enjoy that fucking homework.
And I got a Todd Snyder patch.
Ooh.
Yeah.
That's cool.
I mean, just look up Todd Snyder.
Or don't.
And a Tom Petty button.
Oh.
See?
I pulled them out in the right order.
Yeah, that really did build to a big finish.
All of that is going to be somebody's to deal with
at the end of today's show.
But before we get to the games,
since this is the final of the Scary Movies trilogy of 2019,
can you recommend, and you guys go in any order,
because this is a tough question for some people.
Can you recommend a scary movie?
Yeah, you know what I really like is
What Lies Beneath. You do?
Yes. Why are you into that?
I think it's just
a good little scary movie
that, little fun
fact, they filmed that
while waiting for Tom Hanks to
grow a beard and get skinny.
It's the exact same crew. They shot the
first part of Castaway.
And then they took a break for him to get all islanded out.
They took a break for him to get islanded out
and Zemeckis took the entire crew.
They just picked up, started on this other movie, got done
with What Lies Beneath, and then picked back up in Castaway.
Gosh, I would have
preferred two good movies.
Really?
I didn't like either of those movies. You didn't?
Nuh-uh. I mean,
they're well-produced.
The crew seems good.
What Lies Beneath has a jump scare
every ten minutes, and they're
never scary. Come on. They're always
just loud, and nothing
happened. You know what I mean?
It's always like, it's not really a ghost
making all this. I don't know, it got me.
Like every time her husband comes home,
he's like, sneaks up behind her.
To be fair, I was in a farm in the middle of nowhere
during a thunderstorm watching it.
Which might have helped, but either way,
I really enjoyed it. You know, like she's looking at
herself in the mirror and then suddenly Harrison Ford
is just there all of a sudden and he's like, don't get
cocky!
Dude, you scared me again!
Sounds pretty scary.
Can you imagine Harrison Ford
creeping on you in a house, yelling things
out of nowhere? That's terrifying!
I watched a lot of it recently again
and was really entertained by how nuts it is. I watched a lot of it recently again and
was really entertained
by how nuts it is
but also I could
not remember exactly what the
final twist is I know what the
near the end
twist is
it's like a joke
you think you've heard before
and you don't recognize it until they get to the punchline.
So as soon as I see the ending, I'm probably going to be mad all over again,
because I don't remember thinking it was the most airtight ending to that movie.
But I am going to seek out and watch the ending again,
or at the very least read the synopsis on the internet.
Or I'll tell you if you want.
Oh, you could tell me.
Yeah.
Yeah, okay.
We'll explore all those options later.
But, you know, still,
it's never too early to start, you know,
getting movies to watch for next Halloween.
So in addition to What Lies Beneath,
what do you think, Chad?
What's the one that you like?
There's one that I think is really underrated
called Session Nine.
I don't know if anyone's seen that one.
One human being.
Yeah.
And if you don't think it's like,
I think it's legitimately like super scary,
but it also has the best utterance of the words
fuck you ever in a movie, in my opinion.
So if you just look on YouTube,
David Caruso, fuck you,
you'll get to see magic.
Because he really puts, fuck you. He really get to see magic. Because he really puts
fuck you. He really
goes for it. And it is beautiful.
Yeah, you don't usually
hear that much emphasis on the you part.
Yeah, he drags it out.
Fuck you.
It's very unnecessary.
Ooh.
Yeah.
Fuck you.
Oh, he's a ghost?
He's a ghost saying fuck you? He definitely ghosted up.
The whole time he was a ghost.
Spoiler alert.
Okay, session nine.
Who's in it besides him?
Who's in there?
This guy, not nobody big, like Peter Mullen.
Do you know Peter Mullen?
Scottish actor.
Anyway.
No one cares.
Oh, Josh Lucas.
You know Josh Lucas?
Oh, yeah, of course.
He's in only terrible movies.
Then you'll love Session 9.
That guy is a perfectly good actor,
but I can't think of a good movie that he's in.
He's in two different movies called Stolen.
Is he?
Yes. Hell yeah. He's in two different movies called Stolen. Is he? Yes.
Hell yeah.
That's a true fact.
They made one in the middle of the other.
Really?
Right? One guy was trying to get fat or something. I forget.
Hi, Dan.
Jimmy, can you think of a good scary movie to recommend?
I'm not really into the scary movies with ghosts or supernatural things.
It really actually scares me.
Does this count, the Cloverfield Lane movie?
That was kind of scary.
That was an incredible film with John Goodman.
And I love those things i
love movies that's either set inside of just one location you know like room or like something like
cloverfield or or set it within one day something like drive you know those are very thrilling to
me i i love thrillers more than anything so i think yeah cloverfield lane that's what it's called
right so you like suspense and not horror yes yes, yes. I don't like jump scares.
And ghosts and stuff actually scares me.
Like, I can't sleep for, like, two weeks.
Well, you know this club is haunted, right?
Is it?
Mm-hmm.
Oh, well, shit.
Yeah.
Oh, God.
It's the ghost of Huckleberry Finn.
Jesus Christ. ghost of Huckleberry Finn. You see a
corncob pipe floating around
or a
paintbrush, you know.
Huck is up to his
thing.
But yeah, what was the address though of that movie?
Ten.
Ten Cloverfield Lane.
Yeah, that is a good movie though.
I like it.
Jeff?
I think Frailty.
It's very scary.
Was that the one that was...
Bill Paxton.
He directed it?
Yeah.
McConaughey, too, right?
Very, yeah.
McConaughey, Powers Booth.
Powers Booth, oof.
Quality.
Quality.
Powers oof.
Right?
Quality film about religious abuse.
So, you know, pretty scary.
Oh, yeah. Well, speaking of scary,
now I can't think of what it's called, but
there's that Walton Goggins
snake preacher movie
where there's just always
somebody's about to get fucking bit
by a snake, and it's
really upsetting. Really?
Yeah.
Are you sure? Righteous Gemstones?
Yeah, that's it.
No, the unicorn.
Yeah.
That show looks like such
a waste of everybody's time. If Walton
Goggins isn't playing somebody fucked up,
he's just playing like a regular guy,
what's the point?
Billy Bobby.
Yeah, but I'll think of that title.
Caitlin Deaver's in it.
Jim Gaffigan's in it in a very serious role.
But you still laugh because it's Jim Gaffigan.
Yeah, but it's those snake preachers.
Jeff knows what I'm talking about.
I mean, I've never actually...
I just came pretty close to the snake preachers.
I never really saw one.
Well, you got close enough to notice
that you were close to some.
I tried to go to one of those churches in Cincinnati,
but they're not a real welcoming group.
They just assume if you're new,
you're from, like, Vice.
And I was trying to sell it, too.
No, I'm into it.
I love snakes and God.
Come on.
I heard you guys did both.
and God, come on.
I heard you guys did both.
Anyway, frailty, it's pretty scary.
Wait, I already said that.
Yeah, but I'm glad you repeated it because I do believe that that is a scary movie.
Them That Follow is the name of the snake movie.
Them That Follow.
Yeah, so if that sounds fun to you, check it out.
Okay, so we did it.
We recommended some scary movies.
People could stock up for next year.
You're welcome.
But now it's time to say, turn it off, Bert.
Let the games begin.
We got lots of great name tags for you to choose from.
Jimmy, this is the part where you pick out a name tag
that you like the most out of all the ones you could see.
Some have treats glued to them that you can enjoy.
Others are just amazing pieces of art.
Oh, sweet.
This is awesome.
Yeah, it's pretty crazy, right?
So just pick the one you like the best and get your hands on it and bring it back to your seat.
They're all the way in the back there, so Dan's going to go check it out in the back.
I like this one in the front.
I mean, come on.
This is amazing.
There you go.
See, you're good.
It's got your face on it.
It's awesome.
A lot of them do, unfortunately.
And we'll be right back after these messages.
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Back to the show.
We're back.
Hey.
What a polite group.
There was none of that yelling.
None of that pick me, pick me.
It's a very good crowd
on this November 2nd.
And Dan,
you're already showing everybody
so you might as well talk about it.
This is Cannabil Holocaust.
This is professional. This is really,ill Holocaust This is professional
This is really really good
Bill is also a great guy
He comes to a lot of Bay Area comedy shows
And is somebody that I've gotten to know and love
And so
But if he would have done a shitty job
I would not have picked this poster
I like the way you walked all the way around the room
You were really considering other ones
There's a gentleman in the back Who did a Scrabble board poster I like the way you walked all the way around the room like you were really considering other ones.
There's a gentleman in the back who did a Scrabble board poster
and individually glued all the names
of people who are popular on your show.
But I went with Bill.
So...
But you get a shout-out
because that's great, my man.
You crushed it.
All right.
I love it.
Let's put this down on the ground here
where I can see
that it's Bill
I even put a
Douglas Movies
logo in the corner
that's pro level
oops
there you go
banned in over
50 countries
that
can a Bill Holocaust
love it
and those are
available after the show for
$10 in the lobby Chad who'd you pick John Polisi's ghosts of Mars bars it was
right because it's like okay it's close enough John Carp Polisi. Ghosts of Mars virus featuring you and Kumail
and I think Kate Micucci's on there.
But it's got a lot of candy on it.
Yeah, what do those little candies spell?
There's little snickers with letters on them.
Kick Mars, I guess.
Yeah.
This person hates Mars.
They want to kick Mars.
Because some of those are just the wrappers
Without the candy in them, right?
It appears so
Yeah, maybe this is like a very complex message
I don't understand
Because I'm a dum-dum
I definitely see kick in there
Yeah
The rest I don't know is nonsense
But what's his name though?
John Policey
So close to John Carpenter Ghosts of Mars Bars nonsense. Yeah, okay. Yeah. But what's his name, though? John. John. John. John. John. John. John. John. John. John. John. John. John.
We'll go with John.
So close to John Carpenter.
Right.
Ghosts of Mars bars.
Jimmy, what'd you pick?
I got this pretty obvious one, but it's beautiful.
It's this massive Rambo poster spelled B-E-A-U, which I think means beautiful in one of those foreign languages.
And it has your beautiful face on it, as Rambo.
Yeah.
First Blood Part 2.
I starred in so many movies thanks to this podcast.
It's very exciting.
And GF, what do you got?
Well, you're starring in this one, Doug.
Evil Dead.
I'm playing for Ed.
And I picked it because, whatever, I liked it.
I don't have to explain myself.
There's some pretty good candies on there.
Yeah, one of them's got weed in it.
I'm going to eat that one right now.
But yeah, Evil Dead. I'm playing to eat that one right now. But yeah, Evil Dead.
I'm playing for Ed.
He put apostrophe where the, you know, he did a good job.
Hey, fair enough.
Let's start with a fan favorite.
Ooh, starting with me.
The guests.
Oh, Dan, I was going to make the same joke, but I was trying to open this candy.
I thought, should I put the candy down and grab my mic to make that joke?
And then you beat me to it.
That's why I get the mic stand.
I can still be in the game
while opening it and throwing some candy.
Pro move, Doug.
Yeah.
Mmm.
These fish are so Swedish.
They don't get involved in any conflict.
Except the one in my mouth.
Is that guy dressed as Wolverine?
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
I wondered if we had any costumes.
We do. We have Donnie Darko.
Where?
Oh, right there. Oh, yeah.
That's what I'm playing for.
Is that John Belisi? No, you're trying to beat up Wait. That's what I'm playing for. Is that John Belisi?
No, you're trying to beat up Daniel.
That's what you're trying to do.
Wait a second.
Karate Kid.
Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.
Karate Kid.
Do you know that's full title?
You didn't know that?
That's the full title?
Yeah, they shortened it after production.
Right, Ralph Madge, they made Breaking Away in the middle.
Well, Ralph Macchio learned how to do karate.
That was the most suspenseful sentence I've ever heard in my life.
Ralph Macchio did it with the, and it's Breaking Away.
No, no, no.
Frail. It's a new style of improv called I'm Not That Committed to It. It would break away.
It's a new style of improv called I'm Not That Committed To It.
Yes, and, um, and.
It's called, we practice a yeah, sure style of improv.
Yeah, sure, whatever, man.
So this is a bank. Cool.
What's the gloves?
I'm sorry, but I've just started noticing a lot of people wearing things.
It's from Captain Hammer from Dr. Horrible.
Ooh.
Dr. Horrible sing-along vlog.
Yeah.
Nice.
I want the Wolverine guy to stand up.
Stand up.
Too tall.
That was a deep cut for some of you guys. Mm- Stand up. Too tall. That was a deep cut
for some of you guys.
Yeah, buddy!
Look at that.
There's a guy in the front in a t-shirt
and a hoodie. He dressed as a comic.
That's great.
Awesome.
If you just go buy an easel, you could be Demetri Martin.
Leather jacket and cool t-shirt.
Taylor Tomlinson.
I love it.
I love it.
Any other ones?
No, there's not.
Okay.
The game is called Live, Die, Repeat.
Jimmy, this is going to sound strange,
but this is a game where
I say the title of the movie
and whichever one of you
guys repeats it back the quickest
wins.
Cool.
See, that's the attitude
that we like on this show.
A lot of the guests go, why or how?
I don't know how you're going to do it.
You just have to do it.
For the listener at home, Jeff is not trying to open any candy.
He is ready for this.
Jeff is really ready.
I mean, for the listener at home, I can't get this open.
I quit.
I quit trying before I knew what the next game
was going to be.
I need scissors, but
there's no way anybody got a knife in.
There's a fucking metal detector.
I guarantee, Douglas Movies, there's three knives in this audience.
I saw one guy grab for one over here.
This is like childproof.
Yeah.
Which is all of us.
Oh, you really can't open that?
I really can't.
Here, Jeff, I'll do it.
I feel like I just lost it.
Let me just show you a little something I learned from you. It's of overly protective packaging.
Oh, Doug is taking a pen out of his pocket.
He's going to write a letter.
He's going to push it through.
Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug.
Doug, if you're going to do nice things like that,
I never had a dad, and I'd love to play catch.
Dan, my dad's dead.
Do you want to play catch, too?
Yeah, let's do a three, like a triangle.
I only play catch if it's little bags of candy.
That's what I thought we were talking about.
Oh, okay.
All right, here we go.
I stood up and came over here,
not to get away from anybody,
but just to...
I want to be able to see all their faces.
I feel so official.
Yeah, I just want to be able to capture the moment
when one of you gets this full title.
I'm going to say it slowly,
and every time anybody guesses,
I'm going to start back at the beginning.
The Amityville
Horror.
Great pre-guess, but no.
Pregress.
That's when you're about to do
something. Let me pregress from what I'm about to do
I just figured out how to use it
I progress right like
it's the opposite of digress I get it
I could see I could live here
the live here. The.
The.
The Amityville Horror.
Green Book.
The Green Book.
Is there a the
in Green Book?
The notebook.
The notebook.
It's just Green Book.
So that narrows it
down a little bit.
The.
Living.
The Living Dead. Dead. The Living Dead.
The Living Dead 2.
Living again.
The Living...
These are movies?
The Living...
It's just the title of one movie.
I haven't gotten through the whole title yet.
The Living Dead at the...
The Living Dead at the Manchester Morgue.
That is it!
That is it!
Take your lap, son.
Nice.
Take your lap.
Here goes the victory lap.
I would have went this way if I was here.
Yeah, I would have too.
Now he's going to have to circle back.
Circle back.
Oh, here he goes.
Here he goes.
Up.
Oh!
Wow.
I progressed.
That was good.
Chad, if you win a game again, just go down these stairs and really do a lap.
Yeah, really, really lap it up.
And follow the rules.
That was a great practice round.
Thank you.
I wouldn't call that an official.
No.
Yeah, no. There's still more winning to do Thank you. I wouldn't call that an official. No. Yeah, no.
There's still more winning to do and then he's going to do that again.
It's the new throwing
donuts.
It's the new thing that the listeners
just have to deal with.
Don't give everyone a high five
when you go. Look now who you
feel is being a good audience member,
and that's who gets it.
This guy's giving me one of these.
See?
Look, now they know.
Yeah, they've got to earn it.
I mean, that guy should know that he's too in the middle
to get high fives.
You never know.
I think Chad can make it there.
Crocodile Dundee, those tables, and you can do it.
Do you guys think that just by looking at an audience member,
you can tell whether or not
touching their hand would be a bad idea?
Oh yeah, 100%.
I think everybody here looks perfectly
like everybody looks like they just washed their hands
but I bet you only half did.
Well not everybody, Doug.
Really? Who do you think has dirty hands?
Bill.
Well yeah, he made a poster about cannibals.
Artists always have dirty hands, right?
That guy just touched his nose.
And bartenders always have bad hands.
They do?
Yeah, the alcohol.
Oh.
Maybe they should pour some more in the glass
and not on their hands.
It just happens, buddy.
I'm not high-fiving Wolverine.
He's got fucking large knives coming out of him.
They're retracted.
Oh.
God, Chad, don't you know anything?
I guess not.
Chad, am I right?
Have they ever done on Robot Chicken
a scene where
Freddy Krueger and Wolverine
play Rochambeau?
That's great.
Call Seth.
Yeah, I'm going to get him on the horn.
We could.
I don't have Seth Green's phone number.
I'll give it to you.
Oh, really?
If I just call him cold and say I got your number from Dan Van Kirk he's going to be alright with that? I don't have Seth Green's phone number. I'll give it to you. Oh, really? Yeah.
If I just call him cold, say, I got your number from Dan Van Kirk, he's going to be all right with that?
You're Doug.
Why wouldn't he be?
Oh, that's true.
No, I'm not calling him on air.
That was such a good idea.
What are you guys, a 1991 TGIF audience?
Dude.
Yeah.
Oh. Yeah. Aww.
Aww.
The Olsen twins were cute.
But that agrees.
They deserved every awe they got,
especially since it was only one at a time.
Mm-hmm.
Like, that's why they became huge,
is people just so excited to see two of them at once.
Right.
And Elizabeth just laid in wait for her time to shine.
Oh my God, did she ever. You know what, you guys take the early part of our life. I'm going to crush
this in the end. Yeah.
She's sitting back there with all of her powers to move
shit. Yep.
Letting the twins do their thing. I mean, it is an
interesting case study
and what would happen if you learned how to act.
Jeff.
I don't even know who we're talking about.
Rambo? Are we still talking about Rambo?
Never stop talking about Rambo.
Applaud if you saw
the most recent Rambo movie.
God, I was hoping
it would just be Jeff, but
it's Jeff and Bill.
Told you.
How did it work out for you?
I saw it the day
it came out in an empty theater.
Hey, give yourself more credit. You were there.
I was there.
It was real stupid stupid It was very dumb
And incredibly violent
And that's what it should have been called
Very dumb and incredibly violent
And that would be like
They'd cut up your review for the ads
It would just be dot dot dot
Incredible dot dot dot
I might be progressing here
But Doug guess Do you think Bill liked it Or hated it Incredible dot dot dot. Yeah, yeah. I might be progressing here, but Doug,
guess, do you think Bill
liked it or hated it?
Oh, I think he liked it, but maybe
because it's silly.
Bill?
Wasn't a fan.
Didn't go for it.
I thought I would have said the same as you, Doug.
You guys didn't let me finish. I loved it.
I thought it was terrible
and I loved every second of it
There's a review
They might have sold more tickets
If they let you step up
And say that to the world
Oh and it is First Blood Part 2
That you did the poster for
So you went back to an earlier
Happier time
In the Rambo world.
All right, this next game, Chad gets to go first because he won that one.
I should tell Jimmy there's a series of three games,
and it's the third one that really matters.
Each of the previous games are like warm-ups.
And this game we're going to play now, it's our second time playing this game.
It's an exciting new addition that I thought of when I was watching Price is Right.
It's called More or
Less.
I love applause for something
you don't even know what it is.
He said it like it's important, so
let's applaud. But it is
a fun game. It's a
game where I go to you individually. We'll
start with Chad. I'll tell you the name of a movie. And then I'll tell you a number.
And you tell me whether it made more or less than that number at the domestic box office not counting for inflation.
What? Okay.
Yeah, there's no inflation adjustment on this one.
Okay.
Yeah, they changed...
Box Office Mojo changed their shit
so a lot of it's behind a paywall
and I'm not going to pay to...
I'm not going to pay to find out
the adjusted for inflation number
I don't think anybody will
I don't know why
they think people are going to pay for that
okay so
in this game if you get it wrong
you're out and then we're down to the
rest of the players and I hope you guys do get some of these wrong because if you get it wrong, you're out. And then we're down to the rest of the players.
And I hope you guys do get some of these wrong.
Because if you get them all right, then nobody wins.
I mean, I guess the person who got the most right will win.
But we'll see.
Chad, we'll start with you.
The movie is Halloween.
The OG Halloween from the 70s.
And I want to know if you think it made more or less than $60 million.
Like upon initial release?
Like upon initial release? Halloween.
In its domestic distribution in theaters.
I'm going to say...
So it has been out more than once.
Oh, man.
I'm going to say less.
You think it's less than $60 million?
Yes.
Unfortunately, that is over.
$47 million is what it actually made. Yes. Unfortunately, that is over. 47 million is what it actually made.
Yeah.
So I got it.
Right?
That was the most mind-fucking way to answer that.
You, like, I felt like I was in scanners.
I was like, you hurt me, Doug.
Wow, that was the...
Whoa.
That was almost beautiful
in its performance.
I'm not the highest one anymore.
What did you say, Chad?
Less than 60.
Yeah, you said less than 60.
We're still in it.
We'll figure it out.
We'll figure this out.
So the answer
is less than 60, yes.
Yay!
Like a car in a Nicolas Cage movie, baby.
Less than 60.
I wrote this down in a very unnecessarily complicated way.
It was amazing.
I feel like you just pointed
out where the sailboat is
in one of those pictures where you gotta relax.
I can never see him, so I just get
where I think so hard, I start to get
tired.
Once the answer came out, I was like,
I see it now.
Can you see magic eye paintings?
What's that? Oh, those ships
and those things? No, that's not a thing.
Me either.
Can you?
I think it's all a lie.
I can't.
I do this thing.
I like to do this thing where if I see a picture in a bathroom, no matter what it is, I go,
I could never see these.
And then whoever else is in the bathroom is like, what?
And I was like, they say look through the picture, but I can't see it.
And they're like, it's a picture of a horse.
And I'm like, says you, and then I leave.
You should say, you can't see the sailboat either?
I can't.
I pretend every picture in public is a magic eye picture.
And I just talk like it is to anybody who's around me
if they're a stranger
to confuse them.
It's fun.
I mean,
I live in a real boring town.
San Francisco
is what it's called.
I mean, it's in Ohio,
but it's...
Keep going, Jeff.
Yeah, sure.
I'm busy over here.
All right.
It's your turn, Jimmy.
All right.
The motion picture is, again, the original.
It's been remade.
It's been sequelized and prequelized.
But the original,
A Nightmare on Elm Street,
did it make more or less
than $21 million?
What year was it?
Do we get the year?
If I happen to have it written down
here, you
would get it, but it's like early 80s.
20 something.
Yeah, 21
million in the early 80s. That seems quite low compared
to Halloween, which was
10, 20 years ago before that.
You gotta adjust for inflation.
I would say
higher. I'm gonna go with the price is right strategy. I would say... I would say higher.
I'm gonna say...
I'm gonna go with the price is right strategy.
I got my family there in the corner.
Higher.
Higher.
I actually have no idea who those two Asian people are,
but I say higher!
Higher.
Higher.
I was wondering that.
If Price is Right, can people chime in,
or do you want them to stay quiet since it's Price is Right time?
Also, if everyone's chiming in with the same answer,
like Price is Right, it's a bunch of numbers to choose from
when they're all yelling out, you know?
But they do yell out at almost all the games.
It's pretty funny.
But don't yell out in the next game after this one,
please. But anyway,
Jimmy,
you and your family are correct.
Yes! Thank you.
It made more, but not
a lot more. It made $25.5
million.
That was a hard one.
All right. Jeff?
You ready?
Yeah.
This is the remake, the shot-by-shot, ill-advised remake of Psycho from 1998.
The Vince Vaughn one, right?
Vince Vaughn in the Anthony Perkins role.
The Vince Vaughn one, right?
Vince Vaughn in the Anthony Perkins role And Jeff, I need to know
If it made more or less than
30 million dollars
Look at them out there
They're trying to help their friend
Yeah
Jeff's eyes are closed
Everybody's
That's how he best deals with numbers
Well, I'm trying to remember
How much I spent to see that fucking movie
And there was four of us
So that's 30 bucks right there
So if 10 more people went
I'm gonna say less
Than 30 million
That is correct
Nice, nice, nice
I fucking own this game too million. That is correct. Nice, nice, nice.
I fucking own this game too.
They made 21 million dollars, which
even by their standards
then, that was not a good payoff.
It probably was a big money
loss after advertising
and whatnot.
Dan?
Yes.
The original Chucky movie,
Child's Play,
from 1998.
What?
What?
88.
1988?
Yeah.
I think.
Way more so than 98.
Yeah, that makes sense.
I mean, I wrote it down wrong, so
it makes perfect sense.
Maybe 89.
Oh.
Anyway, it was the first one.
Yeah.
More or less than
35 mil.
I don't know, Bob.
Staying new to your pets.
More or less than 30 mil?
I'm going to go
less. Wait, more or less
than 35 mil. Oh, well then I'm going
less.
That is correct!
Yeah!
Huzzah!
Yeah, made 33 million dollars Wow
So this next round is really gonna
Show you what's what
Back to you Chad
The motion picture that started it off
Saw Back to you, Chad. The motion picture that started it off saw.
Did it make more or less than $70 million?
No, you can yell out of this one, just not the next game.
It makes it better.
Well, it's good when they disagree.
But if everyone's yelling the same thing,
then it would be like, oh, okay.
But it made me think of the early days of The Price is Right before the audience was comfortable yelling out.
And there would just be like one person that was like,
I think it's less.
It sounded like a ghost.
More!
Right?
It's a very spooky episode, you guys.
That one guy in 1976,
bet a dollar!
The first person was so adamant,
I'm saying less.
They were very adamant
that it was less than $70 million.
She really was. And she was right!
Wow!
It made
$56 million. Not even close!
I thought it would have made way
more. I thought it was like a get out
of its time.
It cost like $50 to
make.
A lot of it took place in one location.
Yeah, yeah.
And that was in New Orleans.
I never saw it.
I don't like movies about tools
that are in the past tense.
Oh, so you definitely wouldn't like Vice.
Nope.
Nope, never saw it.
Because it's about tools and it's in the past.
Hey!
Okay, so...
We're going to Jimmy.
And the movie is
the original, I'm sorry I don't know the year,
but it was another one back then.
Um...
The Amityville
Horror. 79, a gentleman in the audience says. The Amityville Horror
79 a gentleman in the audience says
because it's his favorite sexual practice
That's when you lay still
and the other person is upside down
One arm
I mean that's a pretty good one
It's not bad
Yeah it's a lot easier than 89
I'm cramping
Okay
82 million Jimmy
More or less for the Amityville horror
I gotta think it's less, right?
That's a lot.
But also, this could be like a red herring
situation because the number's so high
and it's still higher.
I'm gonna go lower.
You're saying it made less than
82 million.
Yeah.
What's the
adamant lady think?
125
What?
What?
How do you
She's crazy
Did you make the movie?
Holy shit
In 1979?
Tuck higher
What are you going with Jimmy?
I'm gonna go with lower man
Okay you're wrong
Always trust a lady with exact number Yeah Wow What are you going with, Jimmy? I'm going to go with lower, man. Okay, you're wrong.
Always trust a lady with exact number.
Yeah.
Wow.
See, really.
But it was not quite $125 million.
It was $86 million.
Wait, wait, wait.
Did you say 89 or 80?
I said 84.
I mean, 82.
Excuse me, 82.
We said 79 when the guy in the audience said what year it was.
There's been
a lot of numbers jokes being thrown around.
I feel like I'm in a beautiful mind.
I said...
I mean, I feel like...
A scary beautiful mind.
I feel like I'm in the
theater watching a Beautiful Mind.
Like a little,
like I recognize all these people,
but I'm not sure what's happening.
All right, so Jeff, it's your turn.
We're talking
Boo,
a Madea Halloween
Hell yeah
From 2016
So I thought that was an important year
To write down for some reason
Jeff, did it make more or less
Than 80 million dollars?
I mean, it's
It's fun
I love too how it's the people we can't see
Doing the most yelling
Like the people's faces we can see
They don't want to commit
Nobody's really sure if they should
It feels like this is a very
I'm going to say
What was the number you gave?
I don't know I'm going to say... What was the number you gave? I don't know.
$80 million.
I'm going to say...
You know what?
I'm going to say...
More.
That is incorrect.
It made $73.2 million.
I'm going to say more things before I get my answer.
You didn't let me finish.
All right, Dan.
This is exciting.
There's just two players left.
You gotta get this.
The movie is...
Say what?
Showcase Showdown.
Spin that wheel.
Hey, you know that game where the little guy climbs a mountain and he falls off?
Yeah.
That's all I have to say about that. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do.
The movie, Dan, is Ernest Scared Stupid.
Less.
And if you go $1,
I am walking off this stage
but standing by my answer.
I wish I would have gone that low.
Oh, my goodness.
Douglas.
What?
I'm just at the anticipation.
Did it make more or less, Dan, than...
You're going to say $25?
No, $12 million.
Ooh.
Whoa. Okay. No, $12 million Whoa, okay You know what, Steve? We're gonna play
We're gonna play, Steve
I'm sticking by it
I'm going less
Say 11, please
It made more
Okay, oh no Do I have to do a circle? It made more. Okay.
Oh no.
Do I have to do a circle?
It made $14 million.
Shit.
See I felt
I still felt comfortable
about it.
Chad do your lap.
Oh god.
Here he goes.
Let the flips begin!
Look at, who will he give a high five out to?
Oh, he's giving them out to everybody.
Oh, that's right.
He's like a whore at a sailor convention.
Everybody gets a touch.
That's it!
Yeah!
That's when you say remember to spade
That was for Ernest P. Worrell
Full disclosure, I'm still reeling
From the way you responded to Chad's first guess
Yeah
Yeah, that was a trip
We all went on it together
It felt like a Kubrick film.
I was just mixing up more or less with over or under.
I loved it.
Oh, I wish I could relive it.
Did anyone record this?
Will anyone listen to this?
That's the question.
I will.
So will Diane.
Thanks, Diane.
Thanks, Diane. Thanks, Diane.
Okay, so to determine our winner, let's get serious.
Let's stop screwing around.
And let's play Last Man or Woman Stanton.
Doug, I thought about this.
Yeah?
I saw on Twitter, again, you were being so inclusive.
You said, last man or woman Stanton.
We represent people who love the show when we play this.
So what if you just, in one fell swoop, just called it last fan Stanton?
Because we're representing the fan.
Would it still work?
No.
Damn it.
I tried, guys. I tried. I really thought Damn it. I tried, guys.
I tried.
I really thought about it.
I know.
That's what I appreciate.
That's all I ask.
I prefer you pitch these things off the air, not on the show.
I don't want to be mean or anything.
You weren't.
You considered it.
Yeah.
It's already confusing enough that what does Stanton even mean?
When people are hearing it for the first time, they're like, why?
Well, yeah, some of us know.
It's just between us.
But also I do like the or woman because it's not taking another word that is inclusive,
but it's including women with their word.
That's true.
This is the same guy that opened up
that last one of that nonsense.
He's a meticulous thinker, though.
He knows it. He gets it.
Here's how this game works, Jimmy.
You guys, we're going to start with Chad again
because he's running away with this thing. He's flipping somersaults over you guys we're going to start with Chad again because he's running away with this thing
he's flipping somersaults
over you guys
Chad's
going to start and then we're going to go
to Dan and then Jeff
and then Jimmy and the idea
Jimmy is we're going to get
I've actually pre-selected a name
today that I'd like you guys to play
the name of an actor or actress.
And you're going to take turns naming movies that person was in.
Oh, wow.
If you can't think of one, you can go to your lifeline, which is your name tag you chose.
You can go to that person once.
You can go to Beautiful Bo once.
Dan can go to Bill.
And Chad can go to John.
And Jeff can go to hell because I can go to John and Jeff can go to hell
because I can't see his name tag
Ed, Ed, Ed, yes of course
Evil Ed
okay so
yeah and I
you know it's never too early to go to your lifeline
is my advice
and
the films of a man unfortunately it's never too early to go to your lifeline, is my advice.
The films of a man, unfortunately,
after all that talk about women,
I picked a dude.
But it's a man who, by my count,
has not been in too many scary movies,
but there are a few. At least two, maybe three.
Just depends on your fear levels.
The films of Bill Murray.
Ooh.
Okay.
Chad, what do you got?
Ghostbusters.
Started off with Ghostbusters.
Not really scary.
Wouldn't call that one of the scary ones.
Dan.
Ghostbusters 2.
Would not call that scary either.
But I think it's better than people
give it credit for being except for the
Statue of Liberty part
which I cannot stand.
I will not stand for it.
I stay in my
seat the entire time. I take a knee.
I take a knee during that scene.
Jeff.
Meatballs. Meatballs.
Meatballs. Very good.
We're going early so far.
And not scary.
Jimmy?
I'll say the least scary one. Lost in translation.
Yeah, that one's only scary if you're
afraid of
karaoke.
Karaoke.
Giovanni Ribisi.
Hey, Chad.
Zombieland.
There you go.
That's one of the scary ones.
Right, Chad.
Yeah.
Is that the guy
whose name tag you picked?
I don't think so.
Just a Chad supporter.
What a fool. That's what happens when you high- I don't think so. Just a Chad supporter. What a fool.
That's what happens
when you high five
every willy nilly person
out there.
Full Chad.
Full Chad.
Good lord.
Full Chad.
Name of his next album.
Full Chad.
Way better than
Dangling Chad.
Dan?
Zombieland 2, double tap.
Yeah, you did it.
Another one of his scaries.
Jeff?
Dan took mine.
Caddyshack.
Well, I knew it was Bill Murray.
That'd be cheating.
That's true.
Caddyshack, he says.
Jimmy?
I'm going to go for the obvious stripes.
Mm-hmm.
That's a good one.
Nice golf applause for that one.
I couldn't even get golf applause for
candy, Chad.
That one's about
don't fucking do it now.
You're a real Cinderella story,
Jim.
Where are we?
Cops
Chad
Maybe the scariest
Garfield
Who doesn't like
Solid applause
The first day of the week
Dan
It's Christmas season
So Scrooged
Oh wow
Wow
Please don't say It's Christmas season on November 2nd.
I'm doing it.
Why are you playing into that?
I watched two Hallmark movies last night, so I am on board.
A veteran's Christmas and a Christmas for family.
That was the same movie.
No.
No, there was a third one of veterans christmas for family
oh man I'm gonna keep forgetting
I'm gonna say
quick change
nice
yeah that's a good one
I didn't mean to say that one
oh well you still got some other good ones saved up Nice Yeah that's a good one I didn't mean to say that one Oh well
You've still got some other good ones saved up
Dan
Wait is that the right order
Jimmy
I kind of know the name of this movie
Oh don't do that
Do that
Can I describe the movie
Does that count
That'll just help the other players
I have to get the actual title.
I have to get
the exact name.
Now's the perfect time
to go with Bo.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Maybe talk to Bo
and see what he's got.
Okay, okay.
I can talk to him.
No, no, you just ask him
and he'll just yell it out.
No, you don't have
to go to him.
Oh, okay.
I mean, I like that.
That's very polite.
You have to establish
a relationship.
For the listener at home,
we almost had the most personal going to your lifeline.
It was nice.
It was nice.
That was sweet.
It was going to be more of a conference.
It was.
Well, you get 30 seconds, you know.
No, but Bo just needs to just give you an answer to use.
All right, Bo.
Ghostbusters.
No, no.
No.
He's talking about the most recent one
Oh nice
Yeah it's good call
Talk about women you know what I mean
The girls one
Thank you
Life Aquatic
Full title
The Life Aquatic. Full title. The Life Aquatic.
Full title.
Steve, shut your mouth!
Is that not it?
For a listener at home,
Jeff had my back.
Or he was posing.
I'm not sure.
I mean, what's the difference?
I might...
That's true.
They're not coming up here.
The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou?
Yay!
You did it.
Nice.
Connect pronunciation.
No extra points for pronunciation.
I will go with What About Bob?
Oh, man.
That's a big one.
Jeff?
Groundhog Day?
Oh, wow.
We're missing some obvious ones.
Shoot.
I'm going to have to take a guess on the movie that I don't know the name of.
Okay.
We hope you get it right.
Okay. It's been hope you get it right. Okay.
It's been great having you here.
It's...
Shit.
The Dead is alive or something like that?
Are you a member of Jeff's improv group?
Yeah, sure.
Let me ask you a quick question, Jimmy.
Do the dead die?
The dead don't die.
Oh, damn it, I blew it.
Yes!
Yes!
Nice job, Jimmy.
I don't know how you pulled that one out.
Let's close.
Okay, we're back to Chad.
Coffee and cigarettes.
Mm-hmm. Good one. What's close? Okay, we're back to Chad. Coffee and cigarettes.
Good one.
Moonrise Kingdom?
Oh, man.
Yeah, that opens up a whole kettle of fish.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Jeff?
Man, that makes me so mad dog in glory.
When he's in the zone, this is what he does.
He starts putting English on it.
He's in the zone. Auto zone.
I hope they're an advertiser.
You made so much money for doing that.
Trying to lure them in.
I'm live once again at the Grand Budapest Hotel.
Yeah.
Yes. I'm back.
Yeah, dude.
You got that IV plugged into you.
He even said Budapest.
Yeah.
Chad.
I'll go Rushmore.
Yeah.
Nice.
That's a big, big one.
All right, Bill.
Hook me up.
What?
What's that?
Operation Demo.
No.
No. No!
No!
Wait, he said he was joking.
He was joking around.
What is it?
The Fantastic Mr. Fox.
Why did you joke around?
Did you get two tries?
Did you get two tries from your pro?
Dan's not going to win this anyway, Jeff.
I know, I know.
Did anyone say Royal Tenenbaums yet?
Nuh-uh.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's the other one.
Someone will, I'm sure.
So what's yours, Jeff?
Royal Tenenbaums.
Did we skip?
No, two.
Okay, shit.
Are we sure it's my turn?
I think we're over here now.
Oh, shit.
Bill Murray.
What if I changed my answer?
Well, that's what I thought was going to happen.
I thought you were going to throw him a little softball
and you ruined it.
I'm trying to think some
cameos, man.
What would you change yours to, Jeff?
If I could change it, I'd change
it to Broken Flowers, but I think it
might be too late. Oh yeah, Broken Flowers. Great movie.
Oh, god damn it!
Yeah, I'm going to say you were
too late, Jeff. You can't change it.
Jimmy's right. Chad? Thank you.
Yeah, exactly. I had that. It's okay. Don't worry change it. And Jimmy's right. Chad? Thank you. Yeah, exactly. I had that.
It's okay.
Don't worry about it.
I'll go with Operation Dumbo Drop.
No, I don't know.
Kingpin.
Whoa.
Good call.
Dan, is this the end of the road?
It might be.
Might be boys to men in it up here.
Thank you.
Boys men in.
Thank you.
Right, you remember.
That's what he meant.
I don't think they ever had a version for boys.
What about
1-877-BOYS-TO-MAN?
Don't do that. Don't ever
go, ooh, ooh, people are gonna take
those high fives back. You sing that song.
I
will go
with
Shark Tale.
Whoa.
That's a fun guess, but no, he wasn't in that.
No, he meant to be.
Jeff?
Get Low.
Oh, shit.
Oh, yeah, with Robert Duvall.
Wow.
Back to Jimmy again.
I like the animation route.
That could be something.
That could pay off.
You know what I mean?
I'm going to say,
I'm just going to...
Oh, I got one.
I mean, animated.
How about...
Oh, okay.
Yep.
Wait, is Caddy...
He's not in Caddyshack 2,
or is it?
No, fuck.
Well, there he goes.
That's it?
Oh, can I get a second guess?
Yeah, that was a question, that wasn't a...
Yeah, that was just a question.
I thought you were kidding.
So clearly that's not your guess.
Inside out.
Oh, yeah, he was great as Anger.
That wasn't him Thanks for playing
Thank you
Chad?
Where the buffalo roam
Nice one, that made me think of another one.
Jeff?
Hyde Park on the Hudson.
Whoa.
Get out.
Not the movie, just the expression.
Chad?
I actually, I owe it to this guy for his Operation Dumbo Drop made me think of larger than life.
Yep.
Yeah, that's what you meant.
Is that what you were thinking of?
That's what he meant, yeah.
Oh, what?
Okay.
He meant elephant movie.
Okay.
He should have just said elephant movie.
He kind of did.
Operation Dumbo Drop.
You don't really think of other things.
You don't really leap to, oh, Danny Glover was
great in that.
So, Jeff?
Oh, it's my turn? Yeah.
The Monuments Men.
Ooh!
Nice, dude.
Bill Murray's in a lot of movies.
Got anything else, Chad?
I can't believe no one else said this.
Garfield, A Tale of Two Kitties.
Yep.
There's a reason nobody said that,
because no one wants to admit to knowing that.
Yes, that full title.
That that even exists.
I was up here for ten minutes being like,
Garfield, Lasagna, and Mondays.
I could not think of what the sequel was.
No, Garfield gets some in that one.
Oh.
Yeah.
Really?
Yeah.
He gets tail from two kitties.
I apologize.
It's my turn, yeah?
St. Vincent.
Yes.
Holy cow, I keep thinking of more.
There's at least 15 or 20 more.
Really?
Yeah.
He's been in a ton of movies.
Is he in Shark Tale 2?
No.
And he's in talks to not be in Shark Tale 3.
See, that's what you did earlier.
You turn it around and it hurts.
Chad, I bought you as much time as I could.
I know.
I might be out here.
You think so?
Yeah, I know.
There's so many, but I can't fucking think of any. It's the worst.
There's that one
he did that one time, and everyone was like,
wow. But what about the other one, Doug?
What about that other one he did?
Also cool.
Someone already said, what about Bob?
He already said, what about Bob?
Under!
Under.
Oh, man.
My brain is
Just not working
Well dude
You did great
Yeah I'm donezo
Last minute guess
You got a lifeline
Oh I do have a lifeline
I didn't use it
You haven't used your lifeline
I'll use the lifeline
What are we doing here
They both have their lifelines
Okay
Hold on
Let your lifeline
Put their phone away
I'll go the lifeline
What's the lifeline say
Razor's Edge Razor's Edge lifeline say? Razor's Edge.
Razor's Edge.
Razor's Edge.
Razor's Edge.
Now I'm going to think of something else.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Yeah.
Nice.
Was that his lifeline?
Yeah.
Okay.
It wasn't just some random dude?
Hey, I don't know.
These San Francisco crowds.
Tootsie.
Oh!
Oh!
This is the part of the game
Where Jeff gets real nonchalant
With his answers
Oh we're still going fine Tootsie
Real nice
Well now it's officially the end of the road for Chad
I think
I think you're right
Great job though
Do you want to rub it in with a few more Jeff?
I mean I'll just say
wild things and leave it at that
I'm sad
none of you picked up when speaking
about animation and Wes Anderson
Isle of Dogs
do you remember the other one you just thought of?
the one that
Jeff just said I thought of a minute ago.
And then Charlie's Angels.
Oh, god damn it.
How did I not think of that?
Yeah, yeah.
He works.
A little shop of whores.
A little shop of whores.
Best scene in the movie.
Yep.
Osmosis Jones.
Space Jam.
Space Jam. Space Jam Space Jam
Space Jam
Oh my god
Edward
So many
The Man Who Knew Too Little
That's definitely Jeff
I love that
I love that movie
It's the only movie I relate to
I'm also dumb
No you're not
Just crush this game
Yeah that's our winner everybody
Jeff Tate
Do your lap and your somersault Jeff
Do it
Yeah
For the Lester at home somersault, Jeff. Yeah!
For the Lester at home,
Jeff just did a fucking handspring.
It was unreal.
You gotta come to a live show. You've missed it.
I'm gonna be down here for a while, so
don't worry about me.
I'll get up when I can.
Where's Ed at?
Come get your prizes Ed
no hugging if you don't like Harry Potter
Find somebody who does
They'd really appreciate that
You get two free tickets to my next show
Maybe
Depending on the booker's discretion
Yeah we'll see how that works out
And stop by the merch table
On the way out
Get a Doug Benson pin too
We'll hook you up with one of those
Dan Van Kirk Hit us again Benson pin too. We'll hook you up with one of those.
Dan Maykirk,
hit us again with all the important deets.
I will. I am wrapping up the Together tour with a few final cities on the
11th of November starting... Well, actually,
before that, on the 7th, I'll be at the Come and Take It
Comedy Festival in Houston, Texas.
I love performing there, so come out and say
hi. And then on the 11th, I will be in Nashville.
On the 12th, I will be in Louis hi. And then on the 11th, I will be in Nashville. On the 12th, I will be in Louisville.
And then on the 13th, Cincinnati.
Then Milwaukee.
And then the 15th, the day Thanks, Diane, my first comedy album, comes out,
I will be ending the Together Tour in Rochelle, Illinois, my hometown.
So go to DanielVanKirk.com for all that information.
And I will be back here in the Bay Area on November 22nd headlining in Petaluma.
For all those details, go to DanielVanKirk.com
and come say hi to me.
Chad Opitz.
So much more than I have going on.
Damn. I am gonna
I gotta head out from here and host a show at the
Melk Bar across town.
But I'll be here at Cobb's next Thursday.
Two free tickets, don't forget that.
So talk to me after the show.
Yay, follow me on all that shit at chatopits.
Nice.
Thanks.
Jimmy O. Yang.
Yeah, this is actually my last date on my tour at Cobb's Comic Club tonight.
Oh, your microphone's...
Tonight, two shows.
I used to wait until the end to do that.
Tonight, two shows at Cobb's.
I think it's sold out, but there still might be like 10 tickets left.
I don't know.
You can talk to the box office here if you guys want to come.
Yeah, if you just go...
When you leave now, just get right in line, in the standby line,
and a few hours from now, they'll let you know if they can squeeze you in.
Silicon Valley Season 6.
Oh, and for you film buffs,
earlier this year I shot the remake of Fantasy Island.
It's going to be a film.
Next year coming out Valentine's Day.
It's a Blumhouse and Sony film.
I think you guys will really, really enjoy that.
Check that out.
Great.
Jeff Tate.
December 19th in Atlanta
at the Highland Ballroom with
Trey Galleon.
The 20th
also in Atlanta somewhere. 21st
I don't know where.
Asheville, North Carolina
at the LeZoom Room, the 22nd
Central Collective in Knoxville, Tennessee
All of these are with Trey
November 13th
With Dan Van Kirk in Cincinnati
Place is called Chameleon
It's in Northside
Good luck finding it
Different color every time you go
Changes a lot
It blends into the building
But it's got a number on it
You'll find it
And I think that's all my dates and stuff
Alter Tates is my podcast
That's it
Good night everybody
All of my dates and deets Are at Douglovesmovies.com
That's Douglovesmovies.com
Yeah!
How cool!
That's it!
I like the Ted Danson and we're not doing the Bay Arians part.
There's some ladies in Vegas who are from the Bay Area and not doing the Bay Arians part. There were some ladies
in Vegas
that were from the Bay Area
and I called them
Bay Arians.
And they tried
to make that stick
but I can't.
I love the Bay Area
too much
for that to become
a thing.
Hashtag Bay Arians.
Thank you to Cobbs.
Thank you to everybody who came out on this beautiful day here in San Francisco.
And one more time for Jeff Tate, Jimmy O. Yang, Chad Opitz, and Dan Van Kirk.
As always, positive energy!
Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. As always, positive energy!