Doug Loves Movies - John Erler, Sean Jordan and Amy Miller guest
Episode Date: April 1, 2022Doug welcomes John Erler, Sean Jordan and Amy Miller to the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on Stitcher Premium. For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to sti...tcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming, maybe sticky seeds with 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth.
There's still not one that he won't see.
Because Doug loves movies.
Hey, hey, hey, everybody.
My name is still Doug and I still love the cinema.
This is Doug Loves Movies coming to you with this month's bonus episode.
Holy crap.
The time is going by so weirdly.
I really, I could, thank you for that.
I could have, you know, where's your cough button?
Don't you have a button?
All professional broadcasters.
That was a cough button.
That wasn't real.
I pressed mute. I thought I pressed mute, but I guess I coughed over the mute.
I would love, but that's a fun thing to do.
Like I wish I had a cough button that I could push every time I'm about to
swear on terrestrial radio. Cause that'd be a funny,
instead of bleeping just cough every time you go swear. Anyway,
where was I? It's a, uh oh this is this month's bonus episode
congratulations for listening to it it's thursday march 31st 2022 and my guests are three of the
best returning champs amy miller john erler and also he's been a champ in the past there's no
reason to hold that against him that he's not currently a champ as sean jordan hey everybody sup hi everyone hello he's a championship
father now boy i'll tell you yeah pulling down lots of awards for that one she just took a dump
okay nice you taught her to do that i'm out here it was instinct
but yeah i wish i'd show her anyways you know you gotta sometimes you gotta coax yeah you're
gonna rub the belly a little bit like say hey toothpaste it let's go what you two lines
some cigarettes and coke that'll get it right out.
Do you worry about when you joke around like that, that, uh, you know,
there's gonna be a knock from social services on your door.
Yeah, we've had that time. I mean, I,
I worry about all the things I've said on 300 hours of podcasts that we do. It's like, it's had some weird stuff on there. So if she, you know,
it's like kill bill.
Like if she wants to talk to me about it when she's older then i'm right here i think that about tom and christina's kids i think
you're probably safe i imagine you know i ain't gonna shy away from anything yeah i mean you know
that's part of it is you do have the fallback of being a professional comedian on a comedy podcast so that you know you could all
you could say it's all jokes but you know it's not i just uh i didn't mean to bring this subject
up but i i watched king richard the other day and at one point uh you know the neighbors that don't
like them that's what i worry about with you sean is that you have a neighbor that doesn't like your skateboarding ways. I am going to call somebody that's going to show up here, you know,
with this evidence that you're a terrible person. Cause you make jokes about giving your baby Coke.
I wondered, I don't, I mean, I'm a, I don't skate in the driveway these days. I try to keep it
pretty mellow. We just bought a house. So it's like, I don't want to piss anyone off, but I,
yeah, you you know people have
they hear my aunt one time i some joke about doing coke on facebook and she told this is when i first
moved to portland she told everyone i was addicted to coke back home because i made some bad joke
about it it's like it's weird how that happens you know he doesn't she doesn't snort he just
rubs it on her gums it's not like she's snorting it she's a baby and i'm not addicted i only do it
when i want to like before i go out and like Saturdays and just, you know,
whenever I need to like be awake, but I wouldn't,
I'm not addicted by any means.
Do you think that you can, um, as a new father,
watch a movie where, uh, witches do things to babies?
It's tougher. I sound like a coward when I say that, but it's tougher.
I bet. Yeah.
So let me tell you what movie to not see. Don't see, uh, you won't be alone.
Okay. I definitely won't then.
I've had to turn off Grey's Anatomy because they have the popular through line
on these soap operas that I love where they're like, let's have an,
let's have a miscarriage where things have been stagnant for a few weeks.
Let's throw a miscarriage in there. And you're like, bro, you don't have to.
Yeah, that's true. I don't, I don't know.
I don't know why people watch so much of those hour long dramas because the
most traumatic shit has to happen.
Cause you can't just show up one week and everybody's happy for an entire
episode.
Well, like do it though.
Last week a boa constrictor was wrapped around the dude. It's like, sure.
Give me all of that. You got it. You don't need to.
You know how much of that you're going to get every genus of the animal kingdom.
Eventually you just run out of crazy shit that can happen.
At least it wasn't wrapped around a baby.
Well, that's a snack.
Speaking of toothpaste in it.
Hey, let's meet everybody individually and
alphabetically as I do.
He won episode two
at South by Southwest this year.
It's John Erler.
Hey, John.
Hi, Doug. Hi, everybody.
Hi, Sean and Amy.
Yo.
How have you been man pretty good you know
trying to trying to beat this thing that we call covet i don't know that's a i'm sorry i coughed
at the top of the episode i thought i had it on mute and i just fucked everything up oh no that's
all right i just it's i just you know i'm sneezing all the time on my shows, but it's like it was just such a it didn't feel like, you know, because you thought you're on mute, you pretty much cough straight into the microphone.
It was the most.
I have one of these fancy microphones I bought at the beginning of pandemic and I never use the mute function on it because I always mute from my laptop, not from the mic itself.
But this time I was like, I know where the mute feature is on my microphone.
I'm going to use it.
And then I did it and I got bit in the ass.
You pushed the amplify button.
Yeah.
You hit megaphone on that. I that hey let me try it again i'm gonna press mute off and see how it goes okay this is exciting
yeah your view on your mic is not effective that sounded like a joke was that really that
sounded like a cough button for real that That was funny. Maybe it says mute on your microphone. Like, just be quiet. Just mute yourself.
You said this was an expensive microphone. I think you were led down the primrose path, my friend.
I absolutely was. Also, this microphone has a mind of its own and can sometimes just out of the blue.
I do a stream and my voice would be like slowed down to sort of Darth Vader
pitch. And I won't hear it, but the audience will be like,
why do you sound so funny, John?
And then I'll have to unplug and plug back in. Anyway,
I'm sure this is a great topic to be talking about on the show.
My microphone.
It's better when it airs in the other direction,
like sped up podcasts are actually pretty cool in time.
Yeah. Oh, I watch a lot of movies on set up now.
Like it's such a great feature.
Yeah.
You told me you did that and I was horrified.
Cause I mean, if you could, if you can go through them fast,
what else do these movies have?
You're in control of the movie, not the people that made it, you know,
like power of the dog in 20 minutes is a totally different movie. Isn't that good don't you want to be in control no i don't know i think i think when a
movie is a slow burn you have to take the burn that they're feeding you and uh and live with it
you know and then complain about it afterwards because i i hate those movies i hate this the
slow burn i'll tell you about this movie uh you won't be alone it's not a slow burn that
shit happens to a baby immediately i'm not gonna watch it i promise thanks for looking out
i'm gonna watch this movie it's called you don't want to watch this what is it called you don't
drink the titles these days are just
sentences that are it's like the puzzles on wheel of fortune was just like open the door you know
it's just like that's not a phrase don't forget to watch this movie the movie's called you won't
be alone and uh you know i remember that it's's it's just made in Macedonia.
And my girlfriend has a theory I agree with that.
Not a lot of Macedonians involved.
It's in Macedonian. But when you see it, you'll understand what I'm talking about, because there's plenty of people in the film that just get away with not really having any dialogue to speak of.
How'd you get your bits on this movie?
It was just a
got invited to a screening by oh okay focus features said hey you want to come uh you know
it felt kind of like a premiere like they took my picture standing next to the poster but then
everybody else that was there was either you know uh critics or uh people that actually were involved
in making the movie so So, but it was,
you know,
had some hors d'oeuvres afterwards.
Gotta stop saying you love movies so much.
People are going to keep inviting you to this shit.
Yeah.
Well,
I mean,
that's the thing is it's a self-fulfilling prophecy for sure.
And,
but that's why I don't think I would have left early during this movie.
I think I would have left early during this movie.
I think I would have stuck it out, but it's not,
it wasn't really my cup of tea. And you know,
fortunately I knew that there was a cup of booze at the end of the screening that would possibly be worth the wait.
And I was right. I was right.
They had a delicious, they had a delicious Rose. Yeah. You, youé yeah you you won't
you won't be alone you won't be alone
um yeah
if you hate this movie
you won't be alone
also joining us today
put it on the dvd box
i mean because i'm telling
you it's saying that this movie
really made me unhappy is a compliment.
I mean, that's what the movie is supposed to be doing.
You know, I mean, it's like Midsommar and the other one, Hereditary, saying that you were grossed out and freaked out by it is what the filmmakers want to hear.
Is it like a Serbian film?
Like that level of Macedonian?
They're very pretty close yeah no it's not the borders aren't that far i guess uh joining me on my april 20th stand-up show at helium
always a gas in portland oregon it's going to be our friend who's on the horn right now. Sean Jordan. Hello, Sean. What is Kraken Playboy?
I'm excited for the April 20th show.
I already been telling my fans that even though you're not like a regular smoker,
that you're going to get crazy high for the event and that you're also going to get your baby high.
Yeah. Hey, man, I do what I'm told. I got you got a clock in a job's a job.
So I'll tell the neighbors I I'll go kick flip it in their driveway.
You're like, I'm going to go fucking ripped and do standup.
What do you think of that?
I did not expect you to agree to that. That's what I think. Um,
but thank you for, for going along with my, my little joke. And, um,
I am looking forward to seeing you, uh, in,
in how many days do you think it is?
I'm going to guess in the 20 days range
since it's April 20th.
I'm going to say 21.
Right? Because we're recording this a day
before people are going to hear it.
Those are the numbers I was
working. I broke the fourth wall.
This is all one big April Fool's joke, by the way.
We're not even recording right now.
And John never coughs at all all he was just pretending to cough
yeah i'm excited man it'll be dope it's always fun uh always fun to see you it's always gonna
be dope yeah see i talk like i'm stoned out of my gourd all the time i'm just not right yeah i did
one of those shows a while back where you do a set and then you get stoned
and do another set. And it's such a horrible idea for people that don't smoke weed. It's like,
I understand how maybe it could be kind of funny, but I, uh, I don't know. All I did,
I just stood there and I, I didn't laugh or anything. I was just like, this is insane.
And I talked about how bad I felt. I'm scared. Did you seem to enjoy that? Did they laugh?
I think so. I really,
I can't remember. I think I went on autopilot and did some standup and then I left, I got backstage and I was like, I need to go immediately. And the next comic, bless his heart, his name's
Jacob Christopher. He goes, I can take you after my set. And I go, that's not good enough. I got
to go now. And so I just, I had to have someone call me an Uber and put my address in. And then
I got home. I can't handle it, man. I don't know how people can. I just, I cannot do it. gotta go now and so i just i had to have someone call me an uber and put my address in and then i
got home i can't handle it man i don't know how people can i just i cannot do it i can't do it
either i've done the drinking ones and my set is exactly the same yeah those are fine stop on the
block for all miller and jordan but i'm you know if i'd be better if i was if i was to play along with this show that you did and and i was to
show up not high for my first spot and then get high do the second one i feel like i mean i even
did a whole album recording that way just to you know put it out there so people can hear the
differences and the differences are one show happened at one time and then another show
happened later that night so it's obviously not going to be exactly the same, but they're,
I'm going to forget what I'm talking about in both of them.
And I'm going to find my way and make the audience laugh in both.
I hope, you know, but you know, you never know with these things.
And I guess it's, I'm glad I figured out a problem.
I definitely alcohol, if I got
more drunk, then yes, the second
set is either going to be worse
or funnier depending on your perspective.
You know, if you
think it's, I've had comedian friends
like laugh their asses off at
spectacularly bad sets, you know.
I'm not scared when I'm drunk. It's like
if I went into a set and then someone
broke my wrist and I had to go do another set,'s what it's like when i'm high where i'm
just like i'm scared this is i'm scared this is a scary thing i'm drunk it's just like sloppy and
fun okay that's pretty serious take i apologize uh well a serious take is one of her many nicknames. You may know her from winning over Zoom last Sunday,
a mere four days ago, five days ago.
It's Amy Miller. Hi, Amy.
Hello, Doug. Hello, everybody.
Hi.
I heard a rumor that someone went to see a Broadway show.
Oh, yeah.
Well, I only saw company i didn't get to see american buffalo which i'm really upset about because it doesn't run that long
um but what was american buff i just got too many comedy shows and that's a blessing
not complaining um but it just didn't end up working out.
Dance card gets filled.
I'm saying.
I love to do a trip where I do no comedy shows
and just go to Broadway shows
because I hadn't been in three years
and it was so fun.
I just wanted to be close to Sam Rockwell,
as I told you.
I was going to get right up front on that floor because it's a
theater in the round yeah see every angle of sam you can be right there for the violence
yeah because there's stage violence in that show yeah that yeah i saw it once i've heard it so good
yeah i saw it once in the round and uh it was uh the stage violence was quite well done and quite
startling but um yeah sam jackson lawrence fishburne and that other guy uh sounds like a
really uh sam rockwell what that's who's in that place sam rockwell i know what i say sam jackson
oh yeah sam jackson that's intense fishburne and jackson together on stage uh no abe pagoda
from fish the guy who played fish and but no what's the third guy that's in it i can't remember
his name it's like he's like a hot young actor guy yeah darren chris darren chris oh yeah yeah
no i i fucked up to just sam jackson because i you know he's on my mind, of course. The other night
was the Oscars. Yes, Sean?
Part of my ignorance. What does in the round mean?
It means
that
it's not just the audience sitting
on one side and looking at a stage.
It's more like a basketball
court kind of where there's seats
all around, but even without the
baskets. So it's quite literal
it's like that dane cook tour like all around it yeah i gotcha okay yeah it's like that'd be
awesome do they play to all sides of the room yes well they just do it in the middle of the room so
like whatever side you're on that's the view you're gonna get that's yeah but they're turning
around and oh yeah they turn it's like doing stand-up in the round. You've done that, right?
I don't think so. What?
It's wild. Dude, you gotta do
Supernova in LA. That's outdoors
and in the round. It's like two
things you don't normally do.
You know, fucking... And I'll get stoned?
Yeah, dude.
Yeah. I mean, I get
hella stoned for those because I just...
I'll buy that just it's already outside
it is fun yeah you end up turning around
because you're like oh these people have been
looking at my butt for too long I guess
so show it to the side
I think the people
who you have your back to
aren't reacting
the same as the people you're looking at so you have to
keep moving just to keep everybody engaged
totally they do shows in the round sometimes in the improv reacting the same as the people you're looking at. So you have to keep moving just to keep everybody engaged.
Totally.
They do shows in the round sometimes in the improv lab and it's hit or miss as you might imagine, but it's always interesting.
Yeah.
No, you gotta have a deeper,
you gotta have a bigger audience than just a couple of rows, you know,
a couple of rows in the round. It's just like,
why is this stage taking up where people are so close to you too
yeah it's ridiculous my crowd work is just a light slap on the cheek
um well holy cow this uh we're already uh well into this thing and i haven't asked the question
i'd like to ask everybody before we play the games and that's I'd like each of you to recommend one
movie and we'll start
with Mr. Erler
John Erler
please give us a movie recommendation
last night we as a group
on Twitch watched
Wild Wild West
oh goodness
did you hear what Kevin Klein did the other day what did he do Wild Wild West. Oh, goodness.
Did you hear what Kevin Klein did the other day?
What did he do?
I get it.
We picked
Wild Wild West because
Kenneth Branagh, we're so proud
of him at the Oscars winning for
Belfast and he does such a great job
as the evil doctor
in it. They were like, let's do an Oscars themed episode on Wednesday.
And then we were shocked to find that Will Smith was also in the film.
But we decided to keep watching it anyway.
And that film is, is the title is accurate.
It is a wild, wild, wild.
Yeah. It's not just wild West. It's wild, wild
West because it's... You get
what you paid for. Yeah, I mean...
It's a steampunk film, right?
Yeah, it is. That's right. He's in a big
mechanical spider or something.
Yeah, giant mechanical
spider being operated by a legless
man named Loveless.
Yeah, just go to Burning Man.
Just get out of here good song wild wild west is
a good song man yeah yeah branna commits though to the bad guy in that movie and goes goes for it in
the uh that one racially charged scene where they're insulting each other it's not just one
but yeah that there's one really bad one, though, as I remember.
That is, I know, yeah.
I know the exact one you're talking about.
It is, yeah, Will Smith and the evil Dr. Loveless
encounter each other for the first time at a party,
and they just, they don't like each other from the get-go.
And, I mean, the evil character, he's supposed to be evil,
and he's very racist, and he says some racist things to Will Smith.
But then Will Smith, our heroes, is a lot of like ableist things to the villain who's in a wheelchair.
And it's just a weird mess.
Are they like like puns like like, you know, how early they would do those weird jabs?
Yes. They're so bad. So bad.
they would do those weird jabs yes they're so bad they're bad so bad but like it's typical of you know it's realistic in that when people are racist they're also terrible at phrasing things
and making it clever they always say it in the oddest way and uh i we can't i can't don't even
want to quote anything from it it's so horrifying but that's your recommendation is that people
watch this to to to know what to avoid when you're
making a film for the first time.
I mean, it's a real
out-of-this-game-made situation. I mean,
Barry Sonnenfeld, who was just like hot
off the heels of his
Men in Black films, he was like huge.
And then Will Smith and
you know, it had a
lot going for it. And the film looks great.
Like, it's got a great set design and special effects for 1999.
Pretty good.
They took a really big swing.
Yeah.
You know, they went for it.
But it's like, you know, it's typical of TV adaptations.
It's like the one guy had disguises and gadgets.
He didn't have a they didn't have like fucking spider, you know, monster machines that, you know, that roam the earth.
No. Well, yeah, it's, it's fantastical. And some of it is fun, but,
but yeah, there's like, just,
Remember the Johnny Depp Lone Ranger?
Yeah. With your boy, Armie Hammer.
Where they had like, you know,
really modern stunts in
an old-timey period piece so it just it's just i don't know why when they think that's gonna work
it never works well yeah and then yeah cowboys and aliens was a big flop like they keep trying
to like do westerns as fun like modern sci-fi or whatever but has it ever worked i don't know
i just thought of one where i did
work in my opinion but a lot of people disagree and that's back to the future part three yeah
that's what i was gonna say it seems like they were all ripping it off and trying to do the
same thing but it's yeah just failed i love that one me too have you ever seen that um
sorry i was gonna say i think i think they were going for a Blazing Saddles kind of vibe with Wild Wild West, but they just missed
the mark. It didn't come off as fun.
It was a vibe that was already too late.
We were already at that point looking back at Blazing Saddles and going,
that was rough, but it needed to happen.
It opened up a lot of things for people i have a quick recommendation that everyone go to youtube
and put in um kid at the end of back to the future three because there's a scene that
shouldn't have stayed in where this little kid one one of Marty's children, or Doc's children, I guess,
with Mary Steenburgen.
He clearly really has to pee.
So he's looking into the camera
and then looking at, I assume, his mom
and then just pointing
to where you pee from.
And hoping someone
will help him go.
It's very funny.
I love it.
And it's just in the movie because there's just other dialogue going on and stuff.
And they just didn't care.
They just didn't notice it.
Yeah.
Because it's like the whole fight.
It's literally the final scene.
And this poor little kid, he must be like four.
He's just pointing and then and then summoning his mom.
It's very funny.
Oh, my God.
I just watched it while you were talking.
Hilarious, right?
You cheater!
No, this is the Wild West, baby.
There's no rules on the podcast version.
But now people
are going to think you cheat.
Okay, so, Sean,
I recommend a film.
The movie with Jason Segel
and I haven't,
I've never heard of her, but Lily Collins and Jesse Plemons.
It's called Windfall and it's like a sneaky horror movie. Really fun.
I liked it a lot.
I thought I loved.
So sneaky. I wasn't aware that it was a horror movie.
I even saw some of the trailer.
Yeah. I liked, Oh, sorry if I wrecked anything. It's like, it's a,
well, I don't, I feel bad talking. It's, it's really good. It's fun.
There's very few people in it
jesse it's on netflix yeah it's a netflix movie they're both fantastic jason siegel's
a little bit of a villain which is fun but he's still funny and lily collins again who i don't
know she's great it's this is really fun and uh you know well you gotta you definitely need to
check out emily in paris. Yeah. I don't know.
You know me pretty well.
I think I do.
Right.
Is it like a soap opera type thing?
No,
it's just that girl that you just said is great,
but she's in Paris.
I don't,
I only saw season one,
but to me it was a show where nothing happens.
Not a good show.
Well,
neither of you sold it very well,
so it can take a long walk off a short pier.
And I'll watch every episode they put out it's so
bad you watch season two
Amy oh yeah
I do that with a lot of stuff I'm
doing that with station 19 where it's like I'm not
thrilled about it but I'm watching it it's a soap opera
I dig it anyway windfall
fantastic okay got it locked
in do you have a movie that begins with W
Amy oh
no I don't but I had
never seen and
just watched
Pope of Greenwich Village
I don't know why I'd never seen it but
I guess the Benningtons talk about
it a lot it's like one of their favorite movies so they're always
quoting it and I'm like
I watched it
and it's free it's on HBO
yeah it's so good.
I loved it.
It's amazing. It's up on HBO
so you can watch it.
It's
Eric Roberts back in the moment
where he was poised to be Nicolas Cage.
He was just
poised to be that guy that
if you have an over-the-top character,
let him at it and see what happens.
He's so good. He's amazing.
Why didn't he make it? He was so good
in Righteous Gemstone's latest season.
He's a good actor.
He's worked straight through,
but he just never really...
He works non-stop. He works
overseas a lot.
He started off as a pretty boy,
and then he got into an accident and his
features got uh he's still very attractive eric roberts we're talking about yeah it looks amazing
and righteous yeah he's a good looking dude well yeah he's a handsome old guy but like when he was
younger he was like you know his first movie i think was called king of the gypsies and uh
john earlier do you remember any of this?
I think he got like hit by a car or something after his first couple of movies.
And then there was like a bit of a hiatus.
And then he came back and acted ever since.
As if it was yesterday.
God, what a time that was.
I don't remember that, Doug, but thanks for.
Yeah, well, because he sort of that's the thing is he sort of dropped out of his consciousness for a
minute. And then he came back, I think in a movie called raggedy man,
since he's basic that I've always had a fondness for, but anyway,
Pope and Greenwich village, fucking Bert Young,
Mickey Rourke and just a really big,
like Eric Roberts plays like the character that Ed Norton played in Rounders.
You know, the friend that just will not stop dragging you down.
That character.
I mean, you know, Nicolas Cage has obviously played that character.
It's a trope.
But in this particular case, he's just so good.
Yeah. in this particular case he's just so good yeah i think i've i always felt got the impression
when i was younger that it was like also as julia became so massive and like this huge like
cultural icon that people almost started to treat him like frank stallone or whatever like he would
always get like listed in the sand and it's just like no he's really good but as her star rose
people like made him more of a joke and
it just yeah it doesn't make any sense yeah it kind of creeps right like what was that movie star
80 or whatever yeah well star 80 was a awful rough movie that he you know committed to the role but
what a what an unpleasant uh you know thing to to act out you And just an unpleasant movie.
It's like the black mark on Bob Fosse's movie career, if you ask me,
because all of his other movies are great, and that one is just like, why was he
so obsessed with telling this terrible story
terribly? There's not even musical elements
in it you know anyway
got our free cocktail after that movie
make it a double all right so thanks for visiting recommendation nation we got a couple games to
play we got it you're we got it while we call some talkers on the show today. A lot of windbags. Including me. I'm responsible as well.
So we'll be right back.
We are back and it's time
for game one of two.
It's a new game
and I'm excited about it.
It's called An Arm
and a Leg.
And here's how it works.
I'll say a fun
fact and your job as contestants is to try to tell me
if that fun fact applies to anna de armas or john leguizamo or neither
and uh first person gets a shot at it if they miss second person gets a shot at it.
If they miss, second person gets a shot.
Third person gets the gimme if it gets
that far.
And this is
an arm and a leg.
John Earler, you're up first.
Okay.
Only John Earler
can answer this one.
Do you really want to commit
to your preguess? I do not.
All right.
Don't forget, there's no time to joke anymore.
I will slap you if you
joke again. Shit.
Yeah. No, the world
has changed, John. When people joke,
they get slapped. God, okay.
Yeah. Can I slap
back? Sure. Okay. He's going gonna get in a big giant spider and come
for you i mean i just keep flashing on the things the the that kenneth brown a character talked
insulting will smith uh over race and it's in scenes that would not happen in that time period
because everyone was so racist.
He wouldn't be standing there having that conversation with the guy.
And it's all it's all played for just like fun.
Like it's almost like we're supposed to think both of them are really funny and it's all just cool.
Yeah.
We're not supposed to be shocked.
Yeah.
His commitment is unbelievable.
Like they just it's like they didn't get how terrible it was.
Okay, John.
Okay.
Is a voice
in Pixar's
Coco,
Ana de Armas, John Leguizamo,
or neither?
Hmm.
Hmm. I'm going to go with Leguizamo.
You're going Johnny Legs as a voice
in Pixar's
Coco
can I consult my other computer on this?
no, you're not allowed to
we shouldn't even have known that you have
options to consult
have you designed any of these games to be
cheat proof or are they all cheatable
oh that's a good question i guess i could come up with something cheat proof i mean sometimes
just the speed element makes it cheat proof because how fast can you really here's the
thing too you'll hear you'll hear can you hear my keyboard clacking a little bit and some coughing too that was that was sean but anyway sure it was
sure oh no all right but anyway uh to answer your question or to answer your answer uh you said
johnny legs is a voice in pixar's coco uh that is incorrect i got the boner i got the boner spring.
So we go to Sean Jordan.
You have two options. You can either say Ana de Armas
or neither.
That was me coughing. I apologize. And I'm going to say
neither.
That was you coughing? Yeah, I was doing a bit.
All right.
Yeah.
Yep.
What is wrong with this thing? I got it right. yeah yep I need to replace that one
I got it right
yeah that is correct
you did it normally I have a little whistle
that I blow when I say it's correct
but I haven't been able to find it
alright so
congratulations
Sean is on the board
it's one point.
Amy, you get this next one first.
Okay.
Has appeared in three movies that starred Keanu Reeves.
On a Dumb Armistice, Johnny Legs, or neither.
For Amy.
Well, I'm going to say I don't know.
John Leguizamo.
You're going Johnny Legs?
Yeah.
Oh, no.
Incorrect.
Oh, really?
He boinged me.
So, John, what do you think between the remaining options of
honor to arm us and neither?
Could it be both?
That's awesome.
That would be a trip.
That'd be tight.
Both.
But the options were just one or the other or neither.
Cause it's not both.
Okay.
I'm going to go neither.
You're going neither.
Interesting.
Interesting.
Interesting choice.
Got a good feeling about it.
That is correct.
Yes.
It is neither.
John is on the board.
John, you could win it with this next one.
Bring it.
That was a fun question for me because, you know,
Ana de Armas was in one movie with Keanu Reeves called Knock Knock.
Yeah.
God, that movie.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's a rough one.
And then directed by our friend Eli Roth.
And then
who was the other person?
Leguizamo
was in
two out of the three.
He wasn't in the third one.
Yeah, I didn't know that.
What movies? John Wick?
That's what I thought.
Yeah, but neither of them
But I never saw three. Yeah but neither of them have been in three movies with it.
Okay.
Yeah.
Aren't games fun?
Sometimes.
Sean, you can win this one right now.
All right.
I hear you.
Answer this correctly.
I hear you clucking, big chicken.
Okay.
Armis or Legs or neither was born
in Medellin,
Colombia.
Donna Darmis?
I get confused which is the
right buzzer. Oh, here we go.
Incorrect.
Incorrect. Amy. Boner. You could pull a three-way tie here if you guess correctly between leguizamo or neither
born in medellin colombia i think neither i'm gonna say neither you're going with neither
yeah and we have a three-way. Oh, yeah. Congratulations. The answer was neither.
The answer was neither. All three times.
Yeah. He was born in Bogota, Colombia.
She was Cuba. I didn't know. I thought he was born.
Wow. In New York City. Yeah, I thought he was born in Kansas City, Missouri. I thought he was
born into a one-man show on
Broadway.
Nope, he's just the pest.
So we have a tiebreaker.
And this is where
John
Euler really benefits from the alphabetical
order thing.
But also, Amy, didn't you say last time that the person,
the most recent, the champ should go first?
Yeah, I did.
Rather than going alphabetically?
Yeah.
So he's the older champ in this case, so he would still go first either way.
But Sean wouldn't get to go second, Amy. You would have gotten to go second if'd still go first either way. But Sean wouldn't get
to go second, Amy. You would have gotten to go
second if I did it that other way.
You should do it that other way.
Yeah.
So, John, you're first.
Ready? Sure.
If you get this right,
you break the tie, you win.
If you miss it, Sean gets a shot.
If he misses, Amy wins.
He should miss.
Why didn't I get to pick up
Amy's miss on the last one?
What's that?
If it keeps going around,
shouldn't I have picked up when Amy
got the... Oh, no, she got it. Never mind.
Never mind. Yeah, we're good.
Yeah, all right, let's do it.
I hope. I always worry about it later.
So do I.
Play now, work out the details later.
Let's just jump in.
De Armas, Leguizamo,
or neither,
is an Aquarius.
Aquarius.
Well,
here's a fun fact. I'm an Aquarius.
Okay, so which one
is most like you or neither?
That's a great question.
Here's another thing.
All three questions have been neither
so far. So would you
do a fourth question of neither
what do you think doug well i you know i think i like to uh you know confuse and
delight everyone so kitchen you just don't know what's gonna happen next that's true uh i'm gonna and i can't say both why do you keep asking
for the option that is absolutely not gonna be the answer because i feel like they're both
aquarians why would they both i would that's a different game i'd say anna or johnny or both
aquarium this isn't master pancake john we have rules here. Does that make me a scorpion?
That's sick.
An aquarium.
I'm a cancer.
It's cancerian.
All the Libra's know what I'm talking about out there.
They sure do, those Pisces.
The Taurans, the Libra's, the Pisces.
I'm going to say you're going to
mix it up and I'm going to go with
John
Leguizamo as the Aquarius.
Incorrect.
Boner.
Yeah.
All right, Sean. Is it
Anadarmus or neither? That's
an Aquarius. Neither.
Got it. Let's go. You're going neither.
Going neither. Give me the W. Lock that in. Lock it in.
All right. Here comes the sound effect.
I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. You got it right.
Yes. Yeah. I can't tell the difference between these things.
All right. What? Yes. Yeah, I can't tell the difference between these things. Yeah.
All right.
So anyway, yes, that is there.
Neither of them are in Aquarius.
She was born in April.
He was born in July.
I don't know if he's a cancer or Leo because he's on the cusp.
But there you have it.
Leon.
You mean Leon? Yeah. he's on the cusp but um there you have it leon you mean leon yeah i can't wait for the next time we play an arm and a leg and uh since sean brought on that one brought it home uh he gets to go first
in our next game we're gonna play right after these messages and also while Sean's going to check on the baby. We'll be right back.
We're back. How's the baby, Sean?
Chilling, dude.
She's chilling. Okay, good.
You get to go first
in a game
called
Have You Heard
About Hurt?
Okay.
I'm just kidding. That wasy suggested that game on the last episode
i wanted to call it triple h oh yeah triple about hurt yeah it's uh the films of john hurt william
hurt and and john heard and of course now they've all passed away so they're all so it's three dead
guys who people had hard enough time uh keeping apart just
by their based on their last names but we're not going to play that today i just uh wanted amy to
get excited so excited yeah it would have been really hard too i definitely would have been
oh yeah you would have been that's what's funny about it is i thought well is she suggesting it
because she's going to be good at it and the answer is probably not she just knows good wordplay i would stop but that's something i
could study up for you know so maybe i mean i was always good at studying
nerd you're good at learning it and forgetting it 100 all right well the game we are going to play
is called weird algorithm and i'm not sure if all of you have played it in the past.
So I'll quickly explain that the Internet Movie Database, IMDb, has a peculiar feature where you're allowed to just read,
reorder the cast of any movie in order of their current
popularity on the
IMDB star
meter, whatever
their index is that determines
popularity.
So I'm going to name a movie
and I've looked at this list
of the cast in the popularity
order and
your job is to guess who you think
top-b built out of those
people or second or third those are all worth points anything below four is not worth any points
plus strategically uh you're free to uh share answers with each other you just might want to
go against the grain here or there if you're all agreeing on stuff because you know you do want to go against the grain here or there if you're all agreeing on stuff because you do
want to get more points.
You're just going to tie if you don't take any
chances.
Everybody's going to get to go first,
but Sean gets to go first
in this first
round. First first.
First first is Sean Jordan.
Number one at the
national box office right now.
I'll even tell you who's in it.
A movie called the lost city.
That's got Sandy B,
Sandra Bullock,
T Brad P Harry Potter,
Patty Harrison's in it.
Nice to see her in there.
And Oscar Nunez,
another friend of the show and friend of Sandra Bullock. So he's in it. Nice to see her in there. And Oscar Nunez, another friend of the show and friend of Sandra Bullock. So he's in there.
What do you think, Sean, out of all those people,
who do you think is the most popular on IMDb as we speak?
I'll say Daniel Radcliffe.
I just watched a movie called what if the other night and has nothing to do
with this, but I'm just kind of
feeling him right now and I like it.
I'd like him to be the right answer.
Danny Redd.
Okay.
Amy, what do you think?
I'm going to go
Channing Tatum.
Final answer, Doug.
Oh, okay.
Lock it.
He's a funny guy, that Channing Tatum yeah I like
how funny he is when I look at him
that's what I think of first
you're like I'd like to fund that guy
haha look at that guy
can't stop laughing
he is guy
I gotta go change my pants he's so funny
have you seen his hilarious
tight butt
when he dances to
Pony by Genuine, I just laugh
and laugh.
He is hot.
He's hot.
Okay.
Amy's can't be swayed
from picking Channing Tatum.
What do you think, John Erler?
Do you
want to go out on your own here?
Oh, I could do the same guesses as either of them.
If you want to, yeah. Can I try to convince them to change their answer?
You could if you wanted to. That won't help, though.
I'm going to make it a trifecta. I'm going to go with the star of the movie,
Sandy Bullock. She's an Austin gal, and so I've got to go
with the Austin person person right she was
at south by i didn't see the movie at south by but i got to you know uh see her standing around
out in front of the theater uh before the movie um just waiting for the bus
sue falls south dakota born and raised so i'm right there with you same kind of thing
yeah they uh they point the yellow you, they have a yellow carpet at South by
a yellow wall at this, to the interviews in front of what they're pointing towards the street.
So like, if I, if you walk by, if you time it, right, like I did this, I photo bomb Michelle
Yo and Nicholas cage this way. I just walked by with my camera on video and just hold it up high,
you know, so so getting a shot
like over the reporters i just i just would do a you know a run through and then you know then
you pull out the stills and the moments that uh that look the best and uh and now i'm a professional
photographer that's a good call it's pretty exciting dv always looks incredible yeah yes
but now i'm now that i'm talking about it we
i didn't see her at all so okay take a picture of shannon tatum no he's so my number is five
i was doing something else when they were uh doing their movie but i i i do want to go see
the movie i've heard really good things one of the co-directors was directed by a couple of brothers, the Knee brothers, N-E-E. Adam
Knee's been on Douglass
movies before, so I reached out to him
and now he's too successful to come back,
but it was nice to chat with him.
No, he'll be on the show again
maybe. What are you saying about us?
I'm saying that if
somebody had the number
one movie in the country right now, it's made $30 million
last weekend.
I would rather have them
on the show than
none of y'all.
That's why the three of you are here and he's not.
There we go.
But I do want to have them on.
It was cruel how you actually explained it.
on. It was cruel how you actually explained it.
I want everybody
to be on. That's the problem is that I don't have
enough spots for everybody.
And that's why this is Sean
Jordan's final show.
No, he's lying. I know it's a tough
way to hear about it, but
baby on now.
Yeah, the baby is uh almost ready i think
maxine loves movies take your spot is you think maxine's gonna be a big movie lover because of
you and uh the missus yeah i think so uh yeah i yeah i mean i i don't see how people don't like
movies i've never met someone who's like fuck movies. I know, it's weird, right? But there are people, I was watching
Wendy Williams today
and a woman needed like 10
clues to say the word Jumanji.
And it just reminded
me that people just don't, it's not a
priority in people's lives like it is
in ours. Sick.
It's weird to me. I don't know.
But yeah, she, Maxwell,
added that and skateboarding, those are two things.
I mean, I gotta say that it's one of the things I would credit my parents for
is they like just took me to movies early and often. So I just got used to like,
you know, I just, everything about it. I just love it. You know,
it's so fun. The magic of the movie. It's not done for me by any means.
I still love a movie theater just as much as I did when I was six.
So I'll be taking her as soon as she's old
enough to give a shit.
I love it. As soon as she's
focusing on things.
Don't take her to
you'll always be
always be alone. I shan't.
You'll always be alone. It's about babies and I shan't be
you won't be
alone. You'll always be here.
You'll always have a place in my heart.
You won't always be alone. I got it. My alone is not be alone. You'll always be here. You'll always have a place in my heart. You won't always be alone.
My alone is not your alone.
Or whatever it's called.
Okay, so Amy's going with Channing Tatum.
Sean likes
Harry Potter.
Harry P.
And
John
Erler is sticking his neck out
for Sandra Bullock just because of
location.
Also, she's the star of the movie, right?
Yeah. I'd say her
and Jane Tatum are like, it's like a two-hander
and everybody else runs in and acts
funny and leaves. Bo and Yang's in it too.
I really do want to see it.
But anyway. I'll give him a two-hander.
Yeah, I was going to to see it. But anyway. I'll give him a two-hander. Yeah, I was going to say it sounds pretty nice.
You know that movie Windfall is a
three-hander. It is. It's been a while since I
had a three-hander.
You got to pay extra for that.
Unfortunately,
Daniel Radcliffe came in
in the number four position of
most popular of the
cast of this movie.
So there's no points for that.
Horseshit.
Number three was the Channing Tatum that Amy selected.
So she gets one point for that.
And then number two is Brad Pitt,
who people say is hilarious in the movie,
but I don't know how big of a party has.
It feels kind of like a cameo, maybe.
And then number one
is, of course, Sandra Bullock.
So at the end of round one,
the end of round one, John has
three points, Amy has one, Sean has
zero, but it's still anybody's game.
Amy goes first on this next
one. Who do you think
is top billed according to the popularity
index, the weird algorithm that is IMDb for the movie The Proposal.
Starring Sandra Bullock, Ryan Reynolds, Betty White, and our friend Oscar Nunez.
Ryan Reynolds.
Nope. You going? What? Sandra Bullock. Okay. um ryan reynolds nope you're going what sandra okay you'll come back to you again make sure you affirm on your answer but she's going sandra bullet john what if this is another deal where
doug has the same answer for all the questions like in the last round.
Yeah, what if it is?
This is so Aquarius of you.
I'm torn
because Sandy's great hometown
but
He's from Toronto, man. You're really
going to be crossing some lines here if you go i know i
don't want to piss off anybody but he just came out with a movie too although it's not like in
theaters right it's on netflix or something um he has a movie out like every five days
are you trying to get me to not know he's so funny, Ryan Reynolds. Yeah, Brad Pitt, also hilarious, by the way.
All really funny guys.
Timothee Chalamet, super funny.
He's not that funny.
He needs to come into his own a little bit and that'll be funny.
A little bit of chest hair, maybe.
He's not my Willy Wonka.
Is he going to be Willy Wonka?
He's going to be in the
origin story,
Willy Wonka, which is going to be just made up
by somebody because there's never been
the original creator of Willy Wonka.
That racist is dead.
Yeah.
I heard he might not
do it after all. It's sort of a willy or
wonky.
Shut up.
You don't shut up. You do that all day.
I got two shut ups and one very
loud laugh from Doug trying to
stifle a laugh.
Whose turn is it?
It's my turn.
Fuck. I'm torn between Ryan Reynolds and turn. I'm going to go. Fuck.
I'm torn between Ryan Reynolds and Sandy.
I got to go with Sandy again.
I got to go with Sandy again.
Okay.
So Amy and John are both saying Sandy, Sean.
I mean, so the question is,
Sandra Bullock was the biggest in the previous movie.
So you just have to ask, is she currently more popular?
Or is anybody in this movie more popular
than anybody in that movie i don't think they are right now also you got it oh sorry i didn't
mean to know you're all right call me perfect again man sandra bullock i'm gonna say like i'm
gonna agree you're all three going sandy b i think so i need some points okay well you got some tight but so did everybody else you
see how that works i do but you know i could have been i could have had none and here i got some
there you go there you go um all right what's my weakness man okay okay then uh three coming in
number three uh actress that uh i do recall her being in this movie, but, uh, good for her.
She's number three, uh, Malin Ackerman.
She's his, she's his like a girlfriend from back home when he goes home.
That's right.
So she got the mail-in vote then.
Yeah.
You are.
Thank you. Perfect.
thank you perfect and then
coming in at number two
so you all get two points apiece
is Sandra Bullock
and number one of course it's
Ryan Reynolds
patriarchy no matter how hard
Sam finds
yeah damn it
I could have done it
well fuck me I guess all right all right
well I would know thank you but
uh
nice that he asked
though that's nice
thank you absolutely nice everyone else says
get away
no one else slaps you at
the back of their hand get out of my
house um okay so
who gets to go John gets to go first this round,
right? I don't know. I do.
You haven't had a chance to go first yet.
Okay. Oh, yeah, John.
Sean went first in the first
round, then Amy, then John.
That's right now.
You're in the lead with five
points, but Amy's got three and Sean's got two.
Anywhere from three to zero is available
on this one. The film,
John, is Speed
starring Sandra Bullock,
Keanu,
Alan Ruck
from, what do you call it?
Ferris Bueller's Day.
Dennis Hopper,
Pop Quiz, Hot Shot
and of course
Jeff Daniels
to this day will not get in an elevator
whoa
right
really?
no, you made it up
because bad things happen in that movie
if I were him, I wouldn't
he died in one of that movie
when they're pulling people out
when an elevator is like half open,
you know, in between floors and they pull people out,
that's the scariest shit I could imagine.
Having to get out of an elevator that could just cut you in half
in a second.
Yeah. You gotta move
fast, buddy.
Look, it's either going to be...
Damn it. That had a double meaning. It's either going to be... I'm talking to you, John.
Damn it.
That had a double meaning.
It's either going to be Keanu or Sandy, and I'm going to go
with Sandy again.
Okay.
Is it me?
Wait, wait. No, no, no. Amy first.
I'll say me. Okay.
Keanu Reeves.
Wait, no. Go.
Yeah, Amy's first. What? Keanu? Keanu Reeves. Wait, no. Go do do do.
Yeah, he's first.
What? Keanu? Keanu Reeves.
I'll say Keanu too.
I like it.
New Matrix. Wow, shit. That was Christmas.
Well, whatever. He's always dope.
Everyone's always got like a feel good story about how dank he is.
He's very funny. He's very funny.
Yeah.
Hilarious.
All right.
So John's going with Sandy and Sean and Amy are going Keanu.
And they came in the same order I read them off to you.
Jeff Daniels, five.
Dennis Hopper, four.
Alan Ruck, three.
Keanu Reeves, two.
Sandra Bullock, one.
Yes.
That means that John Erler is our winner today. Congratulations, John.
Thank you.
You did it.
I did it. You know, what's fun is we're riffing speed this weekend.
We're doing it on a Saturday on our Twitch channel. So.
Riffing speed could also get you in some trouble, huh?
Perfect promotional timing. I'd like to say.
Is there anything else as our winner today that you would like to plug, Mr. Erler?
Yeah, we're doing a double feature on our Twitch channel.
All you have to do is go to App Master Pancake or whatever in the search bar there.
We're doing a double Keanu because he's so funny.
We're doing speed at 630 Central.
And then in the second slot at 9 Central,
we're going to do The Devil's Advocate.
Ooh.
He's hilarious in both of those
non-comedies. He really is
hilarious in The Devil's Advocate
with Al Pacino
and Charlize Theron. Yeah,
The Devil puts him through some shit.
Oh my god.
Yeah. Okay.
Thank you very much for being here.
I will be in touch about your next appearance because as champion,
you do have the option to return as soon as you're able.
Wow.
Yeah.
Wow.
Can I bring Amy and Sean with me?
We've had such a good time.
No, you're going to have two bright, shiny new competitors.
And, you know, to have two bright, shiny new competitors. And
you know, who knows
what will happen.
The longest winning streak we've had
in the last year or so, I think
was somebody won five times in a row.
Wow.
Yeah.
Sean Jordan. Yes, sir.
What would you like to promote, buddy?
June 2nd.
It's a ways away, I know,
but I will be at the Crocodile in Seattle.
The comedy club, it's called The Hereafter.
It's where Amy is right now.
I'll be there on June 2nd.
I'm sitting here right now with my body.
Doing two shows.
So come to that and listen to All Fantasy Everything.
It's a podcast I do with Ian Carmel and David Porey,
and it's a lot of fun.
And this is awesome.
I would hope someone listening to this podcast would be
familiar with that one by now but if they're not they should definitely definitely check it out
not to mention check out amy's podcast that she doesn't do anymore
or check out the new one that she does do tell us about about that, Amy. It's called Heard, Hurt, or
Heard.
Hard.
No, just watch my
Comedy Central special on YouTube. It's called
Ham Mouth. It's very easy to find.
And I have a new album out
available for pre-order.
And then I have a bunch of dates
that I just confirmed, but I haven't put up yet.
But, like, I don't know, sign up for my newsletter.
That's easy. It's on my website.
I'm going to be in Indianapolis and Denver again,
and back to Seattle and Vegas and all kinds of shit.
You did it. That sounds great. Yeah.
Amy Miller comedy.com.
Be sure to check out our sister podcast,
wide world of Doug, and go to
douglosmovies.com
for all my deets and dates.
And follow Doug Loves Movies on
Twitter, now that that's a thing.
Please. And
thanks again to John Erler,
Amy Miller, and Sean
Jordan. I'll see
you all soon, I hope.
But Sean, on April 20th in here, helium in Portland, Oregon.
You and how long are you in New York for me? Can you say?
Oh, I'm back already now. I'm in Seattle. Well, does this come out tomorrow?
Tonight, late tonight. Oh, OK. Then you can see me in Portland now.
Well, Saturday, right? Friday in can see me in Portland now.
Saturday, right? Friday in Salem, Saturday
in Portland, and Sunday in
Bend, Oregon.
Those are all on my website.
That's a lovely tour of those three places.
I know.
It's going to be so fun.
It's nice, just crisp and sunny.
That sounds perfect.
Alright, thanks everybody. As always, just crisp and sunny. Oh, that sounds perfect. Mm-hmm. All right. Thanks,
everybody. As always,
it's over now,
I think.
Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie.
Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes
him cocky. There's no
room in his heart for you
because Doug loves
movies!