Doug Loves Movies - Joyelle Johnson, Noël Wells, Rob Huebel and Moshe Kasher guest

Episode Date: January 29, 2020

Back home at the UCB Franklin, Doug welcomes Joyelle Johnson, Noël Wells, Rob Huebel and Moshe Kasher to the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on Stitcher Premium. Fo...r a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Doug hates candy wrappers, sweetie babies, sticky seeds with 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth. There's still not one that he won't see, but Doug Loves Movies! Hey, hey, hey everybody! My name is Doug, and I love movies. This is Doug Loves Movies. Coming to you from our OG spot, the Upright Citizens Brigade Theater in Los Angeles, California. The whole gang's here. It's Tuesday, January 26, 2020,
Starting point is 00:00:42 and I'd like to see 20 or more name tags 1, 2, 3, 4 5, 6 close enough great job everybody Doug Plugs, Douglas Movies is back at LOL Comedy Club in San Antonio Texas this Saturday February 1st
Starting point is 00:01:01 at 420 Tampa and Orlando have shows coming up in the first... Was it the first weekend? Anyway, they're coming up soon. For all of my dates and deets, go to DougLovesMovies.com. That's DougLovesMovies.com! Yeah! Caw-caw!
Starting point is 00:01:21 Wallet! Shh! Ted Danson? Some people come in early on the Ted Danson. You just get anxious. You get excited because you get to say it as a question. Yeah. What else did I want to mention before? Oh, I've got a date. You know, a club booked for 4-20 this year.
Starting point is 00:01:48 4-20-20. And that's going to be Comedy Works in Denver, Colorado. I'm doing a stand-up show on 4-20 at 7 o'clock. Tickets are on sale now. Prize bag for tonight I brought in a Hard Rock Hotel and Casino Las Vegas the the hotel that is closing this Sunday night after the Super Bowl they're shutting down they're shutting their doors for good and then a virgin hotel is gonna rise up in the and by that I mean specifically a Richard Branson-branded hotel.
Starting point is 00:02:25 I don't mean the new hotel. It's going to be a virgin. It will be a virgin, virgin hotel, I guess. But that's coming soon. So, you know, I miss the Hard Rock, but I'm looking forward to seeing what they do with it. A Getting Doug With High T-shirt. Hopefully it's the size that works for you. Some Doug Loves Movies stickers.
Starting point is 00:02:47 And, oh, I was in San Francisco recently for SF Sketch Fest, so I brought a copy of San Francisco Magazine. It's a very classy magazine. And then I also think that I have in here, yes, I do, from Rockin' Pins, I got a Doug Benson pin. And of course, that is earmarked for the person who matches me on a name for Last Woman Stanton later on in the show. All that stuff, plus stuff brought by my four amazing guests.
Starting point is 00:03:21 You guys ready to bring them out here? Let's do it. Please give it up for Noelle Wells, Joyelle Johnson, Moshe Kasher, and Rob Hubel. What a lineup. Look at them. Look at them walk around.
Starting point is 00:03:39 It's the women against the men. That is. Here on Doug Loves Movies. That is. Yeah. Hey, you guys. Battle of the sexes. Let's meet everybody individually,
Starting point is 00:03:55 starting with our second time guest on the show. It's Joyelle Johnson, everybody. Hi, Doug. Joyelle Nicole in some circles yeah right we had you on the show for the first time over at the Miami Improv in Doral Florida yeah the irony is I am wearing the same outfit you put on the same outfit tonight yeah I realized that on the way over here I was like I was wearing this same shit but Doug's high ass is not going to notice.
Starting point is 00:04:26 Yeah, I don't know. I guess you're high as well. That's why you brought it up. Exactly. I know how to come for you. Yeah. But we appreciate you coming out. You're doing stuff out here.
Starting point is 00:04:39 I know you live in New York, but you're doing stuff in LA right around now. Yes. I did the new Negro show on Sunday because I'm a Negro. And I did a private show that my friend runs called The Hunger. You guys should check that out. And I'm here with you. A private show? Yes.
Starting point is 00:04:53 How do people... How does that even... It was just me on the lineup. So it was just like private, like just me. Private. Oh, I see. People could come, though. I don't get it.
Starting point is 00:05:04 Okay. All right. Thank could come, though. I don't get it. Okay. All right. Thank you for being here. And to your left. How many times do you think you've been on this show? At least five, six. I think so, maybe. Six, maybe seven.
Starting point is 00:05:16 Let's go for that. Let's say seven. We'll get you your five-timers robe that we've owed you for two appearances. It's Noelle Wells everybody! How's it going? It's going good. Okay that's good. Good enough right? Yeah good enough. As good as it can be at this time. Sure.
Starting point is 00:05:36 And I saw on your or I should say I'm going to tell you about something I posted on Instagram but I was going to start the story like you started it. But you made a motion picture called Mr. Roosevelt and I remembered recently how delightful it is in spite of me being in it
Starting point is 00:05:52 and so I posted a little something on Instagram to remind people to check it out. Yeah it really meant a lot to me Well I'm glad because that movie means a lot to me because it's funny and me because it's funny and fun, but
Starting point is 00:06:07 it's moving as well. I think people would... It's a good movie for right now. I think. Oh, that's nice. Yeah, it just takes four years for the movie to hit. Yeah, cool. Thank you. Thank you. I feel like Netflix has has been also pushed so it's on netflix and over the holidays it was in the popular movie section of netflix next to marriage
Starting point is 00:06:33 story and the irishman literally in between i was like that is the weirdest combination but i'll take it yeah you can't turn a movie off on netflix with two seconds left to go without it putting it in your continue to watch list. It's very irritating. Yeah. You've got to sit through every goddamn second, even the credits at the end about who did the Spanish translations.
Starting point is 00:06:56 If you don't watch all of it, it just goes into your, you didn't finish watching this list. Oh, I'm sorry. Don't apologize. It's only 92 minutes. Just finish it. Yeah, just'm sorry. Don't apologize. It's only 92 minutes. Just finish it. Yeah, just write it out. I was watching something today. I was watching Klaus on Netflix.
Starting point is 00:07:15 And during the end credits, they squeeze the credits over and then start pushing some other movie. And it's like, what's the big rush, Netflix? I paid for the service. Can I just watch the entire movie and then think about what I'm going to watch next? Is that a movie about santa santa claus well you know if you want to be a big spoiler head about i'm sorry i was just imagining you trying to get to the end of the credits on a santa claus movie like i must see yeah well it was just on you know because i i liked i do like to hear what song they tack on the over the uh the end titles and those things. And anyway, I didn't love it.
Starting point is 00:07:47 But I think it's really not a great time for a Christmas movie. Because it's after? Because it's after. But it's also just been a sad few days. Christmas just seems like a weird thing to think about right now. But
Starting point is 00:08:03 I guess at Christmas time it's probably delightful. That's my, I don't want to say anything mean about a Netflix thing. Was it a Netflix original, Klaus? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Say no more. If we whisper it, can we say shitty things? Was this the volume of your private show?
Starting point is 00:08:27 That's Moshe Kasher, everybody! Hi, Doug. How you doing? I'm great. I always hear from you, you always like to come on the show when you've got something specific to promote. Well, what? Classic.
Starting point is 00:08:42 Yeah, I got something to promote. Always happy to have you. Not enough of my friends ask me for, like, can I come on? Always glad to be here. Just wait for me to call. I've been alone, like, most of the past year. Right, you could have been asking. I could have been asking to hang out on a show.
Starting point is 00:08:55 Instead, you're just getting him thinking about you and asking you specifically to do it. Wow. Whereas I have to say, Doug, please. Yeah, it's a real blog back and forth. But yeah, always happy to have you. So what's the thing that's... Oh, I got a brand new album out.
Starting point is 00:09:13 I have a brand new album. It's called Crowd Surfing and it's an all crowd work album and I'm very proud of it. I think it's really good. And I have actually in the little swaggy baggy, I've got a poster and a free proud of it i think it's really good and i have actually in the little swaggy baggy i've got a poster and a in a free a free copy of it this is what albums look like now it's a business card they just give you like an olive garden gift card that you're supposed to
Starting point is 00:09:36 sell at after your shows at comedy clubs it's so who want what happened to things yeah and uh also um that's the sort of thing that the person's just going to lose it anyway. Right. And not even get the album. Sweet. More money for me next time I come to town. They got to buy another card. Yeah, I got to buy that card from you again.
Starting point is 00:09:56 Although they could just listen to the whole thing on Spotify and not pay me in the first place. At any rate. Shh. Don't say that. What can I do? I can't find technology. I have a quick question about your poster, though. Yes, please. why does it have jacob seraph on it that's me oh okay the oft mistaken that's that felt vaguely anti-semitic doug that's uh
Starting point is 00:10:15 i think it's mostly the glasses in the hair yeah i think but i don't know but thank you for uh for being here and for surfing the crowd. The whole special is just crowd work, right? Yeah, it's kind of like almost a semi-concept album because rather than just do regular crowd work, like who are you, what do you do, or whatever, I ask the crowd very specific questions. So like, what was your wildest sexual experience?
Starting point is 00:10:39 Have you ever been arrested? What's your craziest night on drugs? And so then the crowd was telling their craziest stories with a mic in their hand and I was riffing off that. And like the first person we talked to the first night he revealed that his mother he found out had been operating a bordello
Starting point is 00:10:55 out of his childhood home and he didn't realize that it was true until he came home from visitation with his father and there were like straps tied to each of his bedposts and he's like, Mom, what are these? And she's like's like oh i've been meaning to tell you so that was the first story and it only got crazier from there at a certain age you always get that talk what's that i've been meaning to tell you it's a certain age yeah yeah everybody you don't know when it's gonna happen you're gonna get the bordello talk yeah now do you have to deal with like weirdos from
Starting point is 00:11:24 the audience like trying to take credit for the album and like hey man I'm killing it over here on this album. You know what I mean? Like I am worried about people becoming. Or am I inspiring weirdos to be shitty? No so far everybody who's been on the album
Starting point is 00:11:39 that's DM'd me was really excited about it. I think it's like a little slice of fun for them and the whole thing is, yeah, I'm excited. We'll see if I get sued. We'll find out. You won't get sued. We'll sue them first.
Starting point is 00:11:51 Oh, really? You're going to represent me? Yes. This is awesome. Me and Dershowitz. Love Dershowitz. You know, he looks a lot like me and Jacob Siroff.
Starting point is 00:12:03 That's anti-Semitic. All right. So uh and finally joining us at the table is rob hubel hi dude did you know the fourth guest is always a name that goes well with table hubel and table that's anti-semitic yeah what everything is when you think about it hard enough how are you doing police doctor i'm great thank you cop what is it yeah cop medical medical police yes yeah so we shouldn't make fun of netflix also on netflix see we can't talk but your point is legit that i think that they um they really want you to finish stuff once you start it. Like, they told us that. Like, yeah, yeah, lots of people are watching, but they got to fucking finish it.
Starting point is 00:12:52 We're like, all right, what do I want to call people? Like, how am I supposed to, what do I do? You know, but it is, yeah, so. Yeah, because that's how it counts is if you watch the whole thing. You got to watch the whole thing for it to count? I don't know about the credits, but yeah yeah network tv they get they get to count it if somebody watches for five seconds is that true why is netflix so much i don't know i don't know but you like it right i like everything about netflix yeah man yeah man i am sucking their
Starting point is 00:13:20 huge dick say that um yeah they seem nice. I don't know. Yeah, they're nice. What, is everyone here from Netflix? What's going on? There's Steve Netflix. What the fuck? Yeah, they seem nice. All right, well,
Starting point is 00:13:37 let's see what everybody brought for the prize bag this evening, starting with Noel. Hi. Okay, so I released an album last summer albums but i have it on an actual album so it's like oh wait a minute no album it's on a round album it's right it's really cool it's really pretty um it's uh like a blue it's like a translucent
Starting point is 00:14:02 blue my album's called it's so nice it's a it's a music album um it's like a translucent blue. My album's called It's So Nice. It's a music album. It's very good. Wow. It is. How much crowd work? You kind of beat me on every single possible. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:13 She pulled a dick out on you. Yeah. Real quick. Girls versus boys. The dick wins. I got a dick. So I brought this and they're limited edition
Starting point is 00:14:21 and I've actually sold a lot but there's still some more. So here's this. I'm so excited for whoever has this. It's special. That is exciting. It's very special. And then I have like a whole,
Starting point is 00:14:30 I have a bunch of merch stuff. I have enamel pins. I brought a hat for you, Doug. Whoa. This is for Doug. That's beautiful. I was supposed to go on tour but then it got canceled
Starting point is 00:14:39 and so I had all these fun hats and then they, you know, but I have an extra one in here. I also have tissue paper with my face on it. That's really cool and just some other stuff from this tour
Starting point is 00:14:50 that never happened. Yeah, that's it. Tour that never happened. Cool. It's exciting. Oh, it looks great.
Starting point is 00:14:57 That hat looks great on you. Thanks. Is the tour going to be rescheduled? I don't, I don't think so. You know, it's funny because it was really upsetting
Starting point is 00:15:05 that it got canceled because I had worked on this album for such a long time and I just really wanted to sing my songs. But then when it happened in such a weird way
Starting point is 00:15:13 that I thought somebody was probably going to kill me. And then I got a message from a guy who showed up to one of the dates and was like,
Starting point is 00:15:24 you didn't show up here. And I drove an hour to come see you. And I was going to kill you. It basically sounded like he like had this whole agenda. I drove an hour to kill you. I drove an hour. And he didn't have the nerve. I was like,
Starting point is 00:15:38 shut up, face me and die. Yeah, no, but it was really crazy. So I got this insane email from this person and I was like, Oh, that man was for sure planning to slice me up. Sorry.
Starting point is 00:15:50 Wait, is that weird? That giggle. Man, the giggle. Yeah. The nervous giggle. He's not here right now. I mean, the internet is so weird like that. Did you write him back? She just said K.
Starting point is 00:16:01 Did you send him an out of office reply? No, some things you just don't reply to. You just walk away from that. You just walk away. Did you flag it? I didn't. But you know, it's funny because I do feel this indebtedness to people that message me. And at a certain point, I was like, maybe I don't have to message everybody.
Starting point is 00:16:22 No, no, no. No, definitely not. I didn't know that. I don't know. And then when you don't message to message everybody. No, no, no. I didn't know. I didn't know that. I don't know. And then when you don't message them, they get angry. I was like,
Starting point is 00:16:29 the world is just not really set up for women. Huh? You don't have to message your family. Don't worry about random motherfuckers and Instagram. Yeah. I mean, Rob is the king of, uh,
Starting point is 00:16:44 on Twitter. You don't, uh, you just write your jokes and I used to, I king of on Twitter you don't you just write your jokes and stuff I used to I kind of yeah that used to be my thing
Starting point is 00:16:49 now you interact with people I do yeah I broke down yeah everybody gets it eventually yeah but like it is weird though
Starting point is 00:16:57 because I feel like if you do respond to people and then they're on right then and they then it like now we're in a conversation
Starting point is 00:17:04 you know and that's not I don't like conversations they're on right then. And now we're in a conversation. You know, I don't like conversations. They're painful. Let's each make a couple statements at each other and then call it a day. Yeah. You say something nice to me, I'll send you a thumbs up. I don't talk to anybody on Twitter anymore. You don't?
Starting point is 00:17:18 Ever. No, I turned everything off. I put all these words into the filter so that certain things don't get through. What are some of the words? I mean, can you guess? It was like Jew, Jewish, Nazi, motherfucking Jew, Jew, Jew, Jew, Jacob Searoff, Alan Dershowitz.
Starting point is 00:17:34 And my life has never been better. I just don't, there's no winning. There's no fun to be had. You think like, I'm the comedian, I'll win. And I'm like, no, this person's IQ is four. They can keep going forever they're not gonna be like i go i seed i see there's no way that like can get a new identity immediately and come right back into the club like it's just uh you can't stop it i started turning off
Starting point is 00:17:57 comments on my instagram posts even that's fun it's fun oh yeah because it's like also people are hijacking it like it's like this isn't't your plate. This is me showing off my stuff, not for you to come here and say things that are off topic. You know what was funny was Twitter was always a cesspool. And then Instagram, they invented that. And then for a while, Instagram's comment section, I was like, what a fresh air. These people are all supportive and nice.
Starting point is 00:18:20 And it's almost like they all got together and were like, there's some space we could fucking poison. Come this way. Come this way. And then all of a sudden, sudden it just turned and they're just as bad now on instagram so i'm on tiktok if anybody wants to find me are you in the high school girls yeah they're very nice they're very sweet joelle what did you bring for us all right so you had to fly all the way out here. Yes, I do not have an album,
Starting point is 00:18:46 but I have been stalked before, so we have that in common. That bitch had to get a restraining order. So I have a blue hat. This hat is from a college in Colorado. It says entertainment on it, so I thought that was fitting because you know you need knit hats in Los Angeles.
Starting point is 00:19:07 Keeping with the blue theme, I have a blue blanket. Oh, that is nice looking. It's soft and it has a couple of pug dog hairs on it. And this is from a commercial set. Ooh, entertainment. A bitch be stealing. Who's this bitch you keep talking about? And is the restraining order from the production company to you?
Starting point is 00:19:33 To me. I say I have them both ways. And then these are just some bath salts that are from a Steve-E-S in 2018. I don't steal from stores, just, you know, sets. You know, where they gonna throw the shit away anyway, you know?
Starting point is 00:19:49 So this is from a CVS. They were 50% off. There's a little tiny blue shovel that comes with it. You're lucky you have the makings for the most adorable crib ever. Yes, it's a baby crib. If you have a baby crib in your life
Starting point is 00:20:01 that you would like to make a gift basket for, except I got it from all C places, so you might not want to fuck with it. So these are my contributions to the prize. That would make a baby blood jealous right there. Yes. All right. Mommy, I want bath salt.
Starting point is 00:20:19 Shut up, blood. All right, so we know Moshe brought a poster and a business card. It's an album. It's a download for a great album. What do you have for us, Rob? This is also an album. This is a nine of albums. I did not make this album.
Starting point is 00:20:36 Someone gave this to me, and I never opened it, and so I'm re-gifting it. It's an album of all the music from Bob's Burgers. I think it's actually several albums wow also a great gift for a crip they love bob's burgers they love it um yeah so but i don't know uh i didn't have anything to do with this so i just saw the other day you're the lifeguard uh in the episode where tina joins the young lifeguards is that true yeah it sounds like it sounds like something
Starting point is 00:21:05 I would do. Yeah, it's totally you, man. Okay. Yeah, I do remember that. I even watched the credits until Netflix insisted we move on. All right, so yeah,
Starting point is 00:21:14 pass all this stuff down here. What a great This show presupposes that everyone here has a record album, a record player. Not me, because I have
Starting point is 00:21:24 nothing but a business card do you have a pocket you can take my album i also have a cassette i have a cassette of so if you have a single okay i have my album on cassette in there too a kiss album it's really cool okay what was the commercial for where the blanket um came from i don't know. I took that from my friend's house. So you stole it from your friend. She gave it to me. I don't steal from friends. Just corporations.
Starting point is 00:21:54 Okay. I'd like to ask everybody a question at this point. Starting with Noelle. What was the last movie you saw? I saw marriage story for the third time oh so it's a you like it I think I like it I really love the performances I saw it at the when it first came out, and I was kind of not in a good place. And then I was like, oh, this is a movie. So I saw it again. And then recently a friend asked me to go to a screening of it. So I was like, yeah, I haven't seen that in a month.
Starting point is 00:22:34 I'll go see it again. Did Baumbach answer questions after? He did. Neat. He was there. It was really cool. He seems like a very smart dude to me. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:42 Yeah. Nice guy. Smart guy. Yeah guy then they had people it was i guess it was a screening i guess they're doing award circuit stuff and it was a very small screening and then they're like all right come into this room and talk to noah and it was a very tiny room i guess where people were supposed to talk to him and i found that very uncomfortable yeah that's weird it was weird yeah i went to a thing last year where they showed that movie that Timothee Chalamet was in, and the idea was you watch the movie and then meet him in a parlor setting.
Starting point is 00:23:13 He had to go around and do close-up magic for everybody. Oh, no! And he had to lay out some Chalamet magic throughout the room. Is he a magician, or that's a joke? No, I'm joking. I don't know what he did to the people other than
Starting point is 00:23:26 he's a charming fellow. He plays charming characters in the movies. So, but we... Was it Call Me By Your Name? What was the... Which movie was it?
Starting point is 00:23:35 It was that other one where he was... had drug and alcohol problems and Steve Grohl... Beautiful Boy. Beautiful Boy. Beautiful Boy. All right.
Starting point is 00:23:42 So, Moshe's winning. Yes. We're already playing. Moshe's on the board yeah for the first time ever if you ask any question it's up for a possible win today
Starting point is 00:23:53 yeah points all right so what was the last movie you saw Joyelle Bombshell yeah everybody got through
Starting point is 00:24:03 yeah everybody got through their screenings oh that's the name of the movie I thought you were like really gonna tell us something something exciting but did you like it
Starting point is 00:24:12 I loved it I love watching white women struggle but also I'm here for that shit Handmaid's Tale Grey's Anatomy I love it
Starting point is 00:24:24 and these white bitches were struggling like a motherfucker in this movie and it was great to watch and all the performances were fantastic and I found out
Starting point is 00:24:33 she had a prosthetic nose put on so yeah yeah Charlize looks very much like that lady she's supposed to be a little prosthetic
Starting point is 00:24:42 so I love it and John Lithgow as Roger Ailes is just, oh, he's the best. He makes you so uncomfortable. He goes up your spine. He's amazing. Rob? I was just wondering how much, what was her,
Starting point is 00:24:55 I don't know the whole story, what was her settlement? How much money did she get? Do we know? I mean, they were throwing out double digit millions. I want to say it was like $20 million, but it was Greta Carlson that was the one who brought forth the original lawsuit. You want to represent her?
Starting point is 00:25:11 No, I did a thing on the radio, and as I was leaving, she was coming in to do the thing right after me, and I just passed her, and I haven't been that close to someone that's worth millions and millions and millions. So I was like, oh, there's like $40 million. Is that who? Yeah, Megyn Kelly. So I was like, oh, there's like $40 million. Yeah, Megyn Kelly. Did you smell Brimstone as she passed by? I did.
Starting point is 00:25:30 Fire. Brimstone. Santa Claus is white. Oh, Klaus. Yeah, no, Doug knows. They say that at the very end of the credits. In a tiny font. If you've made it this far, know this. Santa Claus is white.
Starting point is 00:25:48 Yeah, he is. J.K. Simmons is the voice of Santa. Oh, I was thinking Rowling. I was like, really? She can do it all. Yeah, they got J.K. Rowling to be the voice of Santa.
Starting point is 00:26:05 Talks about muggles for no all. They got J.K. Rowling to be the voice of Santa. Talks about muggles for no reason. It's weird. Rob, what was the last movie you saw? I think the last one was Uncut Gems, which was great. Can I name two?
Starting point is 00:26:20 Sure. Starring me and Jacob Searoff, that movie. You go to the well one too many times and there's no water in it. I get that. You were great. And then Knives Out I saw, which I thought was also great. Like super fun and just hadn't seen a movie like that in a long time. Yeah, that's good.
Starting point is 00:26:37 I feel like he's going to make another one with Daniel Craig. It's the same character figuring out another thing. That'd be cool. At first was thrown off by by that performance i was like i don't know if i'm down for this but then like after a few minutes i was like all right i'm on board yeah it felt big at first but then it like fit right in yeah it wasn't uh it's also just he wasn't that chewy he didn't go after all the scenery yeah it's also just you know that he's british so it's weird that he's like oh he's cajun or something and then like well i love that's the for a british actor that's the easiest one southern america american southern accent's the easiest for them to do so they always tend
Starting point is 00:27:15 to go that there even when it's unnecessary is that true yeah i think so i don't know i've heard i heard on this new hbo show uh hugh la Hugh Laurie just sort of goes in and out of his... Because he was so good at not being British on House, but now he's probably just like, fuck it. The movie takes place in space. I could be a guy that just kind of talks however he feels like talking in the moment. Well, no, that's part of the plot. Is it?
Starting point is 00:27:39 Oh, yeah, that's part of the plot, is that he's faking that he's American. So that's why he comes in and out of it. Yeah, it's deliberate. I gotta watch shows from the beginning. That's so funny that somebody said that as a criticism. Like, oh, his accent's terrible. It's just not steady at all. It's almost like they wrote it that way.
Starting point is 00:28:00 I like that. All right. I saw a movie. I'm back in. Moshe saw a movie. Well, you know why I skipped you, right? Oh, no. Why?
Starting point is 00:28:08 Semitism. You rarely hear it said that way. Right. It's always anti. I dislike your Semitism. Yeah. I like it. I guess I'd say I'm against it.
Starting point is 00:28:21 Semity. I like it. Yo, Semity. I saw the last black man in San Francisco last night. All right. So you always have to make it about race, don't you? That's the last film you saw. I don't care where you were.
Starting point is 00:28:37 No, I loved it. I loved it because I loved to see. I don't care who else was there. I loved to see a black man struggle. So I loved that film. It was a joke that had to be made. And when you made your joke, I knew I was going to make it. I've been waiting up for it.
Starting point is 00:28:49 I didn't know how it would land. I'm glad I did okay. I was uncomfortable. Yeah. For those just joining us, rewind and get the full story. Well, Moshe's racist. No, no, no, no, no. He does that on purpose in the episode.
Starting point is 00:29:01 It's like Hugh Laurie in that HBO show. No, but I saw it last night Hugh racism has really been coming in and out I did see it last night it wasn't just for the joke and it was a
Starting point is 00:29:11 it was really actually a beautiful movie I really loved it it was really sweet which one? The Last Black Man in San Francisco okay
Starting point is 00:29:17 really good yeah I keep hearing how great it is so like officially snubbed you think by the Oscars well it's a really small indie film i that wouldn't that didn't surprise me i think it's nominated for some uh independent
Starting point is 00:29:30 spirit awards it should so maybe they'll win something there it felt it was interesting because it was super uh sort of fantastical and artsy but it also felt extremely real and probably the best movie on the gentrification in the Bay Area that I've ever seen. I thought it was just accurate. It was just good. And that's such a huge genre now. Well, but it's... No, you're right. But it's a huge story. That's like in January when a critic goes,
Starting point is 00:29:55 one of the best films this year. It's like, okay, but you know. My daughter loves all the movies about gentrification in San Francisco. There have been three. Was Up in San Francisco. I take her to those. There have been three. Really? Yeah. Was Up in San Francisco?
Starting point is 00:30:08 Is that why you flew out of there? Right. Because you're tired of what was happening in the neighborhood. Well, Pixar, their studios are in Oakland. So in a way, absolutely, yes. There you go. But no, there was. Inside Out.
Starting point is 00:30:19 Sorry to bother you. There was Blindspotting and then there was this. The hate you give? I didn't see it. Trainspotting is about gentrification in San Francisco. You guys don't know that? All those people were not originally from San Francisco.
Starting point is 00:30:37 They're Scottish. Does anybody have any impressions they'd like to do? I can't think of a better way to get into that. But I like it when people do impressions, if you have any. No pressure. Can I do one? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:59 This is, I just had something taken off my neck. People that are listening at home, you can't see these stitches in my neck. So this is my dermatologist today. I think everyone's going to get this. She was like kind of a little old lady. First time I'd been to her, and she goes, oh, no problem, I'll take that right off. Oh.
Starting point is 00:31:20 That was crazy. That felt exactly like her. That's an efficient doctor and an efficient impression. I mean, you have to meet her, but it rose spot on. I can do an impression. Okay. Actually, it's appropriate for this podcast
Starting point is 00:31:35 because it's the movie phone guy who I don't think... I've got to do a pretty good movie phone guy. I love it. Hello, and thank you for calling AOL Movie Phone. If you know the name of the movie you'd like to see, there we go. Hello, and thank you for calling AOL Movie Phone. If you know the name of the movie you'd like to see, press one now. You have selected
Starting point is 00:31:53 Bombshell, starring Charlize Theron. Watch these white women struggle. Select, select. Brought to you by 106.1 KMEL Jams. That was the local radio station that brought us... Anyway, select. Brought to you by 106.1 KML Jams. That was the local radio station that brought us. Anyway, yeah. Yes. That was great.
Starting point is 00:32:12 Do you just do it online now and just read everything in his voice? No, I just find people of a certain age. I'll be like, here's an impression. You're going to know what it is. Yeah. I go to Billie Eilish concerts and try to make friends. AOL movie phone!
Starting point is 00:32:28 They're like, what is AOL? What is a phone? What is any of this? That's the TikTok demographic. Yes. Let's see if I can land this. Ha ha!
Starting point is 00:32:42 Oh, good! That was all right! That was all right! That was all right. From The Simpsons? Yeah. Okay. Hell yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:32:51 I'm proud of that. I'm proud of that. That was good. That was naked and untested into a microphone. That's also a fun way to do it. Like, no setup. Just do the impression.
Starting point is 00:33:01 I wanted to see if we don't guess right. You just be like, oh, you didn't know who that was? You don't know. You don't know right You just be like Oh you didn't know Who that was You don't know You don't know Who that was
Starting point is 00:33:07 You know the hat Yeah Do you have any Noel? You know I have a Bernie Sanders impression Yeah But I'm really
Starting point is 00:33:17 I haven't done it In years Okay But it was like When he first ran I had this impression I was like God
Starting point is 00:33:24 I hope this lands I like how your lips Started moving I had this impression. I was like, God, I hope this lands. I like how your lips started moving. I'm getting PTSD from Asana. Keeping the theme of anti-Semitism on tonight's show. Be like, if I'm elected president, every American citizen will be guaranteed a substantial Twitter following. Ballerinas will not have to dance on the feet i like i like he makes a lot of wild promises babies will not have to be born birth is a very traumatic experience for both mother and child if i'm elected babies will just spring into existence
Starting point is 00:34:03 with the thought and the will. And then it's like a lot of hand gestures. I'd say better than Larry David. I dare say it. I heard your post nasal drip. You put it in there. You put it in there.
Starting point is 00:34:19 Larry just shows up looking like that. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, that was a great round of that. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, that was a great round of impressions. Yeah. But now's when I say turn it off,
Starting point is 00:34:34 let the games begin! We got some name tags, you guys. Not a ton, but some really good ones that are, most of them were folded up and put in a pocket. Oh, I didn't see that one earlier.
Starting point is 00:34:49 I didn't see that one. Okay. Lots of options. While you guys go pick who you want to play for, we'll go to this brief commercial message. We'll be right back. Hey, everybody. There's no ads this episode,
Starting point is 00:35:01 so I'm just going to take a moment to say that I'm very excited to be doing my annual countdown to 420 show. That's on April 19th, 1030 p.m. at midnight. When the show ends, we go, yay, it's 420 and we go outside and smoke and that's outside the san francisco punchline and then the next day april 20th 4 20 20 i'm happy to say i'm spending with my friends in denver yeah That's right. Comedy Works, downtown Denver, 7 p.m. show. Stand up on 420 with me. Tickets are on sale now. Back to the show. We're back. Who are you playing for, Noelle Wells? I'm Glengarry Glengarry.
Starting point is 00:36:01 So good. What's his name, Glendor Gary? so good what's his name Glenn or Gary you can ask him are you Gary do you know where you got it Gary
Starting point is 00:36:12 Gary but that's great yeah it's a really fun poster he's got a lot of faces on there they look like they're mostly you oh really
Starting point is 00:36:21 it's just a bunch of my face there's two of you all right Joyelle we got fear whoa fear and Laurel Mostly you. Oh, really? Just a bunch of my fans? There's two of you. Joyelle? We got Fear and Laurel in Las Vegas. Yes. Wow. That is... I love it.
Starting point is 00:36:33 I chose it because the titties look fabulous on here. And that's my kind of girl. And it also came with an accent that I appreciate that I don't know if I can announce on the podcast. So, yeah. Laurel, is that you at Burning Man? Wasteland. Wasteland, the Mad Max-themed Burning Man type of festival.
Starting point is 00:36:52 I love all the bondage. That's real good. You can strap her and just shoot her into space. Where's Wasteland? It's out in the California desert and you must be in costume to attend. So if you're in, I'm in. Yeah, let's go. Great. Yeah, I like
Starting point is 00:37:08 that. Hell yeah. Moshe? I am playing for the Princess Beagle and there are Tito's vodka bottles all over it and some Skittles, so it's a wild night in. Someone named Beagle? Yeah, right here. Oh, okay. Your name is Beagle? My last name, yeah. Oh, Mr. Beagle? Yeah, right here
Starting point is 00:37:25 Oh, okay Your name is Beagle? My last name, yeah Oh, Mr. Beagle Yeah, Mr. Beagle What an adorable dog name I never thought of that Just putting Mr. in front of
Starting point is 00:37:40 Whatever kind of dog they are That's my dog, Mr. Beagle Oh, a. Beagle. Oh, a little beagle? Nope. Dopamine pincer. Rob, what'd you end up with? Aubrey's child. Aubrey forgot to put liquor or weed
Starting point is 00:38:00 on the cover of this. Like everybody else has, but I appreciate that, Aubrey. Still got your attention because of Jenny Slate. Jenny Slate. Picture and yeah. And Aubrey is a great reworking of Obvious.
Starting point is 00:38:13 She did a great job. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I learned. I was holding it up for the cameras. I just didn't want you to have to hold it up the whole time. Yeah, because the cameras
Starting point is 00:38:24 didn't make it down here tonight. There's no cameras? No cameras tonight. Yeah, this is just for us. We didn't even remember to record it. Oh, no. We're not even recording audio. It's just a live show now.
Starting point is 00:38:40 But no, we got some fun games ready to play. Apologies to... No, we'll some fun games ready to play. Apologies to... No, we'll get done in time. Let's say that mostly because I don't know what show's coming up next. Let's start with a game called Characters Welcome. In this game, I am going to read to you, all four of you are in play at the same time, guess as often as you like.
Starting point is 00:39:03 I'm going to read the characters listed, some of the characters listed in the end credits of an actual motion picture and the first person who can name the movie based off of those clues wins this game. And you know what they win, Moshe?
Starting point is 00:39:19 One million dollars? Oh, a new copy of my album. Nope. You would win the opportunity to go first in the next game. Okay. Yeah. An underwhelming crowd. I just like to bring the stakes as low to the ground as possible so that you guys can just relax, let your brains just hear this,
Starting point is 00:39:40 and give me the correct answer. and give me the correct answer. According to IMDb, what movie has these characters in it? Ballroom Party Server. Ballroom Party Server. Beer Hall Dancer. Yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 00:40:04 This is why you shouldn't get too far into the credits Doug coyote ugly soldier see that was a good guess Star Wars it's another great guess my dinner with Andre soldier glory so no on Andre with telegram Blues Brothers Brothers. A League of Their Own. Taps. Oh, oh. Officer and the Gentleman. Private, Saving Private Ryan. 1917.
Starting point is 00:40:32 No, why did I think that? There's one person in that. Schindler's List. The Aviator. Schindler's List is a good guess for the theme of tonight. Inglourious Bastards. The end credits of 1917 just says Running Man. That one guy.
Starting point is 00:40:47 The name goes by, yeah. Train Porter. There's a train porter. Racism. Murder on the Orient Express. To Yuma E something. Yeah. Tombstone.
Starting point is 00:40:59 Don't guess audience. I think I heard somebody guessing or coughing. Yeah, is that 210 to Yuma? Hannah. There's someone named Hannah. Hannah. Oh't guess audience. I think I heard somebody guessing or coughing. Yeah, is that three times to you? Hannah. There's someone named Hannah. Hannah. The movie Hannah. What'd you say?
Starting point is 00:41:12 Hannah. The movie Hannah. Oh, yeah. Hannah and her sisters. John Brooke. Seems like a western. Yeah, I'm feeling western and I'm getting stuck. Mr. Dashwood. Ohwood oh um oh oh oh oh is it women little women is correct
Starting point is 00:41:31 the next name i was gonna say is my favorite name little women marmy march marmy uh you guys see The Little Women I gotta see it I haven't seen it Yeah People love it That's one of the ones
Starting point is 00:41:50 You haven't seen It's nominated for Best Picture Yeah That's why when we Went around earlier And you asked what Movies we'd seen
Starting point is 00:41:55 I didn't list that one Yeah Well he only has said two Backstage you said You've seen most of The Best Picture nominees But that you also Don't know which movies were nominated for Best Picture
Starting point is 00:42:06 That's true It was an interesting statement I said I've seen I saw it cut jibs Almost all of them Then you dropped a microphone which was also weird Just hanging out backstage I brought my own microphone
Starting point is 00:42:17 Backstage Alright so that means that Noelle won that game Congratulations Yes Noelle did you game. Congratulations. Joelle, did you see that movie, Little Women? Absolutely not. You will love it. So many white women struggle.
Starting point is 00:42:33 You better do it. Yeah, it's a lot of struggling. There's some struggle. I read the book. Did you see it? How's the movie? I did see it. Uh-oh.
Starting point is 00:42:42 Yeah, no. Okay. What are we saying? Oh, we edited that part it. Uh-oh. Yeah, no. Okay. What are we saying? Oh, we edited that part out. No, yeah. No, I liked it. Wait a second. Were you forced to watch it against your will?
Starting point is 00:42:53 No, no. I mean, I found it slightly confusing. It was hard to follow, but I liked it. Did Natasha walk out on it? No, no, because we were laying in bed. And when she gets to bed, I don't let her leave. You know what I mean? Yeah, dog.
Starting point is 00:43:06 Mm-hmm. Everything about this segment is making me very uncomfortable. I'm sorry. I just, I fucked up. Listen, I want to tell everybody this. She's your little woman, huh? I was rash with my speech. I didn't think about what I was saying.
Starting point is 00:43:20 And she is a little woman. She's 4'11". Oh, wow. Wow. That's very, 4'11". That's very... 4'11". I thought she was against 11. So let me ask you this. Let me ask you
Starting point is 00:43:31 this question. The time jumps in Little Women threw you off. Yeah. Because it jumps around without nary a date on the screen. Right. And at a certain point, I was... I figured it out eventually,
Starting point is 00:43:48 but I don't want a movie that I have to go like, oh, okay, like 30 minutes in. Like, I now understand what's happening time-wise in this film. But I loved it.
Starting point is 00:43:58 I thought it was great, you guys. I thought it was great. Can we move on? Was Marriage Story also nominated or no? Mm-hmm. Oh, that's so cute like husband wife yeah they both got nominated for best picture but of course he's the only one
Starting point is 00:44:10 that got nominated for best director also cute also cute adorable yeah but you know they'll put both loose in 1917 because everybody loves it because everybody loves it. You didn't like it? You know, it's amazing that they did that. I've got to see it. I've seen all the movies that are nominated. It's a really cool long-ass shot that follows people around for a long time.
Starting point is 00:44:39 It's kind of like a Cribs in the countryside during a war. Like MTV's Cribs? Yeah. Because they're just following him through all these places. Right, right. He's like, where are the magic happens? Sometimes they describe it like, this seems dangerous over here. What's up, everybody?
Starting point is 00:44:54 I'm Michael. This is my trench. Yes. Here is my copy of Scarface. This is my foot. It is falling off. this is my foot it is falling off I just didn't
Starting point is 00:45:07 you know I just didn't get get into it it felt you know other people said this but it feels like watching somebody else
Starting point is 00:45:13 play a video game you know oh is it exhausting like is it too much no it wasn't too much like I wanted more of like I wanted it to be more exciting
Starting point is 00:45:22 like just to compare it to something else like you know the shit that characters go through in that movie is pretty grueling, not unlike The Revenant with Leonardo DiCaprio. But for some reason in that movie, I was always interested in all the fucked up shit that was happening to him.
Starting point is 00:45:38 Whereas these guys, I was just like, I just didn't get personally involved in their story, even though the photography was amazing. You see six underground, bro. What? Oh, that Netflix thing with Ryan Reynolds that,
Starting point is 00:45:50 uh, paid to mention Michael Bay directives. No, but it is nuts. It's so over directed. Like, like every shot is so fucking huge to just a guy, like literally walking from his car into the building
Starting point is 00:46:05 is like drone fucking steady camp. Well, Michael Bay usually has such a light touch. That's weird to hear. It's really like this car chase has real violence in it. Like most car chases, when a car that doesn't have the main character in it goes off the road, you don't get to see that person just get completely mauled.
Starting point is 00:46:25 It's really violent. I've only seen half of it. Because I was like, I can't watch this on a phone. I started watching it on a plane. And I was like, this is like a big screen movie. If you're going to watch that movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So good job.
Starting point is 00:46:44 Good job job Michael Bay yeah alright this next game is called it's a new game suggested by someone on Twitter
Starting point is 00:46:52 named Joe B. Realty I don't know if he's a realtor but the game is called Firth Things Firth and I'll name a movie I'll go to you one at a time
Starting point is 00:47:04 we'll start with Noel I'll name a movie and you tell me if that movie features Colin Firth thinks Firth. And I'll name a movie. I'll go to you one at a time. We'll start with Noelle. I'll name a movie, and you tell me if that movie features Colin Firth, Jonathan Firth, or Peter Firth. Oh, no. So it's Colin, Jonathan, or Peter. Yeah, this is a Firth for me. I don't know. I know Colin Firth, Jonathan Firth, or Peter Firth.
Starting point is 00:47:25 I don't know if it's brothers. It's Colin, Jonathan, or Peter. I don't even... I think they're all unrelated. I was thinking about buying a house from John B. Realty, but fuck that guy. Wait, was it Colin? Oh, I shouldn't ask this question. Forget it.
Starting point is 00:47:37 Right. It was going to be a fun joke, but it would have been also a spoiler of this game, and I'm going to stop now. Oh, I see what you're doing. I get it. Smart. That's why they don't let people talk that much on jeopardy because they might say some upcoming answers accidentally so we'll start with noel and if you don't get this then it moves to joyelle and then we stop there because i only like names that sound kind of similar.
Starting point is 00:48:09 The motion picture is Circle of Friends. Jonathan Firth. Incorrect. Okay. But I like your commitment to it. Joyelle? Oh, Colin Firth. That is correct.
Starting point is 00:48:22 Damn it. Why didn't I go with the obvious Firth? The famous Firth. The Firth Firth. Why? The famous Firth. That is correct. Why didn't I go with the obvious Firth? The famous Firth. The Firth Firth. Why? At the end of this we find out
Starting point is 00:48:31 neither of them are actors. Colin's the only actor. I wouldn't do something like that. The other two are realtors. Alright. Joelle's on the board. Moshe. You're a realtor? All right. Joelle's on the board. Moshe.
Starting point is 00:48:49 Moshe, we start with you. Okay. Colin. No, I'm kidding. Your guess beforehand is probably just as good as once you hear the title. The English Patient. Oh, oh, okay. Wait, I just almost watched this.
Starting point is 00:49:07 You were almost ready to be bored? Well, no, Natasha and I have been doing a project for a long time since she first got pregnant. We were watching every Best Picture winner in order, and we just got to The English Patient recently. We couldn't make it all the way through, and
Starting point is 00:49:21 I know that Colin Firth is not in that film wait do I so I'm gonna say Peter Firth no Rob Jonathan no the other people down with me. Noelle. Damn it. Colin Firth? Noelle is correct with Colin Firth. I'm an idiot. I'm a fucking idiot. Aubrey, I'm so sorry, but you didn't give me weed or anything, so fuck it. It's anybody's game. That was my fault.
Starting point is 00:49:59 You shouldn't apologize. That was totally on me. I'm a fool. I'm a fool. Did he say you started watching the movies when Natasha was pregnant? Yeah, we haven't gotten all the way through. But your baby is 16. She is two next month.
Starting point is 00:50:12 It's been a long project. To my credit, the first 15, 20 years are trash. Hey, Gone with the Wind. That's later than that. Gone with the Wind. It Happened One Night is the first good one, then Gone with the wind then that's later with the wind gone with the wind it happened one night is the first good one then gone with the wind but i mean have you tried to watch wings it's like
Starting point is 00:50:30 jezebel was one of them oh i don't know i don't that doesn't but maybe there's been so many and then they start getting good eventually but for a while you're just like people are just like look we have a camera we can move it this way. Best picture. Gandhi? Gandhi's great. Really? Now we're in the good zone. Really?
Starting point is 00:50:49 That was fun to watch? I love Gandhi. What about Last Step Forward? Have you seen the sequel? Gandhi in 60 Seconds. Jesus. That would have been so good. Damn it. You were so close.
Starting point is 00:51:00 Let's go back. Let's edit it out. Edit it out. Colin Firth has forgotten the, you know, yeah. Gandhi in 60 seconds. It's a lot better and quicker of a watch. I will say that. Chariots of Fire, not a great movie, but it's there.
Starting point is 00:51:16 Yeah. Yeah, there's just so many. They like big, long, boring movies sometimes. What I have heard is the real thing to do is not to take the Moshe and Natasha challenge but in fact to watch the best screenplay winner. That way you will see the best movies
Starting point is 00:51:30 because usually best screenplay and best picture are the same thing unless the best picture winner is garbage then you're going to see a good movie for that year.
Starting point is 00:51:38 So when I have another kid I will go back through that. It's the right reason to have a kid. Well they're not really Impacting me either I didn't even know Colin Firth was in the English page
Starting point is 00:51:51 That's very stupid Where do we leave off Joyelle Yes The hard part Which one's in Shakespeare in Love Colin Firth
Starting point is 00:52:00 That is correct I'm sensing a theme, Realty Boy. Moshe? Yeah, I'm going to go with Colin Firth. Let me tell you the movie first.
Starting point is 00:52:15 What a Girl Wants. I got to go with Colin Firth on this one. You are right. It is Colin Firth playing Amanda Vine's dad. Oh are right. It is Colin Firth playing Amanda Vine's dad. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:29 What a job he did there. Rob, Girl with a Pearl Earring. Please God. Which one was in Girl with a Pearl Earring? It's definitely Colin Firth. I love that. It's like my favorite movie.
Starting point is 00:52:45 Nominated for Best Picture this year. It is one of my favorite movies. And Colin Firth's performance in that fucking movie is like, when I think about it, I get emotional. I'm serious. He's the dad to the dog. And he's like, oh, man. Wait, are we talking about What a Girl Wants
Starting point is 00:53:04 or Girl with a pearl earring? Whatever you said. Alright, so girl with a pearl earring, you're going with Colin. That is correct. Get me on the fucking board. You're on the fucking board. But I stand by what I said. This guy's a terrible realtor. Like every house has bedbugs
Starting point is 00:53:20 that he sells. This guy's gonna blow me up on Twitter. This feels like then this is, is there going to be a trick? Keep going. Go ahead. Tell me the name. The movie is Nanny McPhee. What?
Starting point is 00:53:35 I actually know this. Best picture. I feel scared. There's no reason to be scared. I guess I could be safe. The winner doesn't win anything. I could just say Colin Firth. You could.
Starting point is 00:53:49 Colin Firth. Is that what you're going with? Yeah. That is correct. Oh, my God. Are Peter and John even people? He just made up Firth names. He just gave white men names. I like that. I made up Firth names? You made up Firth names He just gave White men names
Starting point is 00:54:05 I like that I made up Firth names? You made up Firth names Where are we at? Joyelle again? Okay The movie is From
Starting point is 00:54:21 2009 Because there's been Several of them. A Christmas Carol. Colin Firth. Yeah, that's right. I love where this is going. Moshe?
Starting point is 00:54:38 Yeah, I think you know what I'm about to say. Do you know what I'm about to say? Mama Mia, here we go again. Colin Firth, baby! Yes! This guy jacks off to the name Colin Firth. He's listening to the pod just like...
Starting point is 00:55:10 Rob, which one was in the movie 1917? My favorite movie, man. When that guy's running and there's like an explosion. Colin Firth is definitely in that. Colin Firth is in it. It's true. He's great in it. He gives them the mission at the beginning.
Starting point is 00:55:26 Spoiler. Spoiler. Beginner spoiler. Noel, the movie is The Hunt for Red October. Converse. Before you say that, let me just say that was a Best Picture winner
Starting point is 00:55:44 1992. No, I'm kidding. That was the whole thing? That was my whole bit? That's why you jumped in there? The bit was about, it's obviously Colin Firth. Anyway, they don't all win. All right.
Starting point is 00:56:00 What'd you say, Noelle? Oh, man, I forgot. Colin Firth. That's incorrect. It is? Oh, no, I forgot. Colin Firth. That's incorrect. It is? Oh, no. That motherfucker. Wow. You really set me up. That was a long walk. Joelle?
Starting point is 00:56:13 Down a short submarine. I honestly feel very betrayed by you. I feel super betrayed. I might not stick around. Panic setting, because I don't even know what movie you just said. Hunt for Red October. Peter Firth. And the choices are Peter, Jonathan, or Colin.
Starting point is 00:56:33 Peter Firth. That's your answer? That's my answer. That is correct. Points. Points. Now we're talking. Points.
Starting point is 00:56:41 Points. Now we're talking. Moshe? Yes? A movie called Life Force. I mean, Jonathan Firth? No. No, obviously not that.
Starting point is 00:56:57 That's why I put a question mark at the end. I meant Peter. Rob? What's the name of the movie? Life Force? Life Force. Is this a Scientology movie? No.
Starting point is 00:57:07 Life Forth. Night Forth starring Firth. That sounds like a Colin Firth movie. It does? Yeah. That's incorrect. What? Noel? Shoot. Oh God, Peter Firth. That is right. You did it.
Starting point is 00:57:24 How many rounds of this are there? This is crazy. We're going through all of the films of all three. The firsts. Of the firsts. All the films of the firsts. All the firsts. All right.
Starting point is 00:57:36 It is almost over. Joyelle, this is yours to lose. All right. Which one was in The Prince and Me, A Royal Honeymoon? Peter Firth. Troyelle. That was intense. That is incorrect.
Starting point is 00:58:01 Roger Ailes. That is incorrect. Moshe. Colin Fir incorrect. Moshe. Colin Firth. Incorrect. Rob. Now I got to remember the name of the other guy. Nobody tell him.
Starting point is 00:58:16 Oh, my neck stitches. Ow. Jonathan. Jonathan is correct. That's another point for Rob. What's the score? The score is Rob has four points, Joyelle has four points,
Starting point is 00:58:29 and it's really nice of Noel and Moshe to be here with less points. So we have to do a tiebreaker between Joyelle and Rob. All this determines who goes first in our final game tonight. Wow. Nervous. And I can feel my stitches tearing. I don't feel sorry about your stitches.
Starting point is 00:58:56 It's a plan to win. I'm going to say one movie. Who's going first? You're both going to go at the same time. Oh my gosh. First one to tell me which first. First's going first? You're both going to go at the same time. Oh my gosh. First one to tell me which Firth. Firth one to Firth. First one to tell me which
Starting point is 00:59:11 Firth was in. Kingsman. Colin. That's correct. Rob Hugel is our winner, but we still have one more game. Rob just gets to go first in Last Woman Stanton. Where are the cameras?
Starting point is 00:59:31 Yeah, show that to the, if the cameras were here, you would have held that up. They're going to zoom in, right? And show Aubrey how hard you're working for her tonight. You're going to try to get her
Starting point is 00:59:41 all the prizes. For no weed, no Skittles, no liquor. You got to know how to pick them. Yeah. I don't know why you didn't pick some of that stuff glued to it. And Noelle's has stuff on the back, right? Yeah. What do you got?
Starting point is 00:59:53 I got some whiskey and Reese's. Reese's peanut butter cups. Yum. Reese's. How do you say it? Oh, wow. How much did you say it? Why did you just lick the back of her name tag? Oh, now he's... There you go. Damn.
Starting point is 01:00:09 Aubrey put acid on the back of it. Okay, here we go. I would have expected that more from Joyelle's name tag. Yes, this is an acid trip. To be more drug-deft at. What's the name of that thing in the desert? Wasteland. We gotta go.
Starting point is 01:00:29 Now you're ready. Now I'm ready. What would you dress up as? Man, I don't know. Medical police. Yeah. And you know what I'm going as? Jacob Seroff, baby!
Starting point is 01:00:43 Alan Dershowitz. All right. So I think some people reached out to me on Twitter, but I didn't check it recently. But here we have one here in the front row. You did? You reached out? Yeah, you got a suggestion?
Starting point is 01:00:59 I have a mashup if you need. A mashup? Get out of here. Just give me one or the other. Parker Posey. Yes! He said Parker Posey. Joy joelle's excited i don't i don't know why i just she's mean and i like it all right hey can i give you a podcast to plug what's the call again the last podcast you'd want so it's for people who uh don't like themselves and will listen to something that they personally did not want. The last podcast that you'd want.
Starting point is 01:01:30 And I'm a guest on an episode. All right. And somebody else raised their hand. Not if you have a name tag in play, because that's not fair. This lady right there. Helen Mirren. She says Helen Mirren. All right.
Starting point is 01:01:42 Neither one of you matched the name that I have written down in my wallet! But, you know, so that will continue to play another day. What's this part of the show? This game is called Confuse Rob Hubel. I guess you don't get it because you're on acid, man.
Starting point is 01:01:59 But it's clear to the rest of us. Unfortunately, Rob, this might not be good news for you, but you're going to take turns naming the films of Parker Posey or Helen Mirren. My favorites. They are. Right? Yeah. A couple of great gals doing great work over a long period of time.
Starting point is 01:02:19 They both have a big body of work. But you can go to your lifeline. You can go to Aubrey once. Everybody can use the person whose name tag they chose. You can go to Aubrey once. Everybody can use the person whose name tag they chose. You can go to them one time for help. Mine just cursed at me in my eyes. We in this baby.
Starting point is 01:02:35 And I like to play along in this game because it's fun for me. And like I said, I've never met this gentleman. I was only recorded on his podcast. So there's no proof that I've met him. And we're cool.
Starting point is 01:02:53 Parker Posey, Helen Mirren. Who did we sign? Oh, Rob, you won that last game. So we'll start with you, and then we'll go to Moshe. We'll go around that way. I just have to name a movie. Anything that's got Helen Mirrenren or parker posey or both which i'm not sure exists you never know man come on guys let's just have fun you know you can go to your lifeline immediately. Aubrey. Aubrey, what do you got? I have nothing.
Starting point is 01:03:26 Oh, shit. Aubrey. Aubrey's got nothing. Lick that name tag again. See if that helps. Aubrey doesn't have any Helen Mirren or Parker Posey movies? Think of all the movies that Parker Posey and Helen Mirren are in and just say one.
Starting point is 01:03:40 Yeah. It seems easy enough. You know, like Rob says, you should be able to do it. But somebody else near you could whisper one in your ear maybe. Just real quiet. The competition? Is there one about like dogs? Ask first.
Starting point is 01:03:52 Get consent first before you whisper an answer in somebody's stranger's ear. Isn't Parker Posey in a movie about like dogs and you must love dogs or something like that? You know, I think she might have read for that, but Diane Lane got the part or something. Yeah, you can't really... Please don't say what the actual answer is because somebody thinks they know what you're thinking of. Okay, okay.
Starting point is 01:04:13 Yeah. Anything, Aubrey? I don't think Aubrey's going to come through. Nobody's helping you up there, Aubrey? Which one? Red. Red. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:04:25 Yeah, Helen Mirren's in red. That's right. Yeah, now we can keep going. Now we're talking. Now we're talking. Yeah. Moshe? So if I guess I'm out, right?
Starting point is 01:04:33 What do you mean? If I guess and I'm wrong, then I can't use my lifeline. Well, I mean, I'll let you guess once. You know, I'm not going to throw you out immediately. Wasn't she in... No. Wait, was she in James Bond? What?
Starting point is 01:04:48 Hellamere was in James Bond. Yeah, that movie. She's the new James Bond. Wasn't she in James Bond? Yeah, unfortunately none of them are called just James Bond. They all... That's the title of all of them and then there's a subtitle. No, that's the name of the guy that's in all of them.
Starting point is 01:05:04 His name's never in the title. Was of them and then there's a subtitle no that's the name of the guy that's um his name is never in the title was it um goldfinger let's go to your lifeline okay lifeline best in show yeah best in shows parker posey yes of course the queen joelle says the queen colin marion the queen noelle says the queen Colin Mirren the queen Noelle Waiting for Goffman this one's gonna really this is gonna kill you Rob back to me my turn
Starting point is 01:05:33 my turn I'm gonna spoil it for you okay right now by saying Red 2 yeah that was my
Starting point is 01:05:40 that was gonna be my next one is that the name of it though yes it is yeah they went like somebody had a really short work day yeah uh coming up with red two electric boogaloo yeah uh no colon no subtitle is it my turn uh you got this like skyfall yeah i don't know if she is, but... Then maybe she's in Goldfinger. No, she's definitely not in Goldfinger, because that one's from the 60s.
Starting point is 01:06:12 But wasn't she... She was active in the 60s. Helen Mirren? Active? Yeah. Wasn't she? I know she was in this Fellini film. She was sexually active.
Starting point is 01:06:23 Damn, can I just describe the movie? Oh, that sounds like a fun game. It's about a hotel where she's the chef, and it's in India, and some Indian shit happens. It's called the something, the Bombay, Chez Bombay. Yeah, you're totally on it. Okay. You can totally picture it. Elizabeth.
Starting point is 01:06:44 Huh? Elizabeth. Oh, I thought you were like calling on a lifeline no with Kate Blanchett you tell me I don't know joy oh I'm mighty wind yeah no well dazedused yes yes can I clarify something when I said must love dogs I was not thinking about Best in Show
Starting point is 01:07:12 Best in Show I just want to say that those are yeah those are clearly different to you yeah one's a rom-com and one's a classic
Starting point is 01:07:19 is it my turn no it's my turn but I was gonna say to Noel good job yeah
Starting point is 01:07:28 that last one you said was spoken like a true party girl that was me back up most of I mean Rob Casino Royale
Starting point is 01:07:40 what? do you think Helen Mirren is Judy Dench? Yes. Yes. Yes. They're both dames. Yes. You did it. You did it.
Starting point is 01:08:00 Okay, so you're out. Moshe. But I don't want to be out. Oh, you're already out, Joelle. But I don't want to be out. Oh, you're already out, Joel. You've got mail. What? Oh, yeah, Parker Posey's in that. Oh, that's what I was thinking of when I said must love mail. I was thinking of that.
Starting point is 01:08:18 Do you have another one, Noelle? No, Gary, help me out. No, come on. Gary doesn't have anything? What a shock. All right, you know what, cats? I'm just kidding, this is help me out. No, come on. All right. Gary doesn't have anything? What a shock. All right, you know what? Cats. I'm just kidding.
Starting point is 01:08:28 It's Judi Dench. Yeah, it is Dench. It's a Dench. Fucking Dench. Dench. All right, so it's my turn. So I'm going to say for Parker Posey, Superman Returns. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:08:43 All right. This is, I'm blanking. Drawing a blank. That's cool. What about your lifeline? Does she have any? Lower Laurel looking at me like, bitch, you on your own on this one.
Starting point is 01:08:54 I know. Yeah, I was thinking that. Blade Trinity. Oh, listen to that. Blade Trinity. Look at that. That's sexy. It's like Blade, like Wesley Snipes.
Starting point is 01:09:08 Believe her. She goes to a Mad Max themed festival. The Blade one. Believe you, Trinity. I want to dress up as that. I don't even know what it is. Is Judi Dench in the Blade movies? Yeah, she's the lead. She's Blade.
Starting point is 01:09:24 Yeah. Yeah. What's the lead. She's Blade. No, no, no. Yeah. What's the one where people obsessed with the Kennedy assassination? House of Yes. That's it. That's also what they call most improv clubs like this one. Alright, so that means Joyelle's our winner!
Starting point is 01:09:44 She did it! I just want to say my homegirl over here is the movie buff, so that means Joyelle's our winner! Yes! She did it! I just want to say my homegirl over here is the movie buff, so I just wanted to make her proud of me because I know she got at least five on hand right now that she can name right now. Who, Christina? Yes, Christina. Christina is the movie.
Starting point is 01:09:58 Christina, which ones did we leave out? I immediately just thought of Josie and the Pussycats. Josie and the Pussycats. I told you. Yes. I told you, yes. That was a good one. There weussycats. Josie and the Pussycats. Oh, shoot. Yes. I told you. That was a good one. There we go.
Starting point is 01:10:07 Yeah. That would have been my next lifeline. I just want to say that my homeboy over here doesn't know anything about movies, so he's proud of me as well.
Starting point is 01:10:14 So, right on. We did it, man. That's totally cool. All right. So, where's your... Oh, you're right here. So, you want to come get the prizes?
Starting point is 01:10:23 Yay! Go, Gordo! Go, Gordo! It's in like three different bags. And then also, I didn't want to put Moshe's poster in a bag. Yeah, you want to keep it nice and pristine. Good t-shirt. She's got on a Breakfast Club t-shirt. We like that.
Starting point is 01:10:38 All right. Yeah. Do you know what the last line of the Breakfast Club is? I just found this out recently. Hey, hey, hey, hey. It's one of a list of movies that has the title of the film as the last line. And so the last line is... Sincerely, The Breakfast Club.
Starting point is 01:10:58 And there's not that many, and I just read a list. Yeah, Anthony Michael Hall's character just decides to call them that when it's not even... They don't eat breakfast. No one came up with that. that many and I just read a list. Yeah, Anthony Michael Hall's character just decides to call them that when they don't eat breakfast. Nobody says that to each other ever. I guess Ally Sheedy eats a breakfast sandwich, right? When we had Saturday detention, it was early, though.
Starting point is 01:11:15 They were there all day. But they started at 9 a.m., right? I guess so. I don't know why it's called that. That's more of a post-breakfast. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner club. Yeah, and what did they do for lunch? They all brought sack lunches, right? And Ally Sheedy eats a...
Starting point is 01:11:30 Is it a dandruff and Captain Crunch sandwich? I think. She makes dandruff on a picture she drew. She doesn't put it on her sandwich. But she does make a Captain Crunch sandwich, I'm sure of that. Yeah, but that sounds good to me. Aren't all scenes the same thing? Don't they all happen at once?
Starting point is 01:11:48 Isn't that how movies work? I don't know what anything is. The janitor from the Breakfast Club I forgot his last name. John Capello. John is in Medical Police. Thank you. You better plug. Look at that.
Starting point is 01:12:04 And what he did in the Breakfast Club was he was hard at work and my album is all crowd work so you should check it out. Crowd surfing. Kind of a stretch
Starting point is 01:12:13 but we'll allow it. Yeah, definitely a hard stretch. Not even that clever of me but I did want to plug it one more time. And I don't surf because I'm black but my name is Joyelle
Starting point is 01:12:20 so check me out online. Welles, that was out. Welles. That's was fun. Noel. Noel. Sincerely the breakfast club. Where do people go to buy your music? Noel Wells.
Starting point is 01:12:37 You can go to my Instagram and, or it's so nice. Dot net. I made my website. It's really fun. You can also just listen to it for free as well on Spotify. But I have records
Starting point is 01:12:49 and cassettes and I will be doing a show February 23rd at the Comedy Store. It's a fundraiser. Oh. I'm playing some music and that'll be fun.
Starting point is 01:12:58 Yeah. Yeah. I'm Joelle Nicole. You can find me online J-O-Y-E-L-L-E N-I-C-O-L-E. I am doing the Carlson
Starting point is 01:13:05 in Rochester, February 6th to the 8th. And then the Impractical Jokers cruise. Cool. Oh yeah, you'll have fun on that. When does this come out? Probably in like two and a half years. Is it tomorrow? Yeah. Oh, this weekend I will be at the DC Improv, one of
Starting point is 01:13:21 my favorite clubs in the country. And the place that I recorded that album. That's where you made the album. Yeah, that is a great club. I love it, and it'll be so fun. And then I'm going to Telluride. Are you going to Telluride? Yeah, dude. I'm going to the Telluride Comedy Festival with Sir Medical Police right here. That'll be a lot of fun.
Starting point is 01:13:35 The weekend, I believe, after that, the 14th. The 13th or the 17th. Yeah. Yeah, we'll both be doing shows in Telluride. Everybody, come on out. Fly out there. I don't even know what that is. It's in Colorado, and it's the most beautiful place. There's come on out. Fly out there. I don't even know what it is. It's in Colorado,
Starting point is 01:13:46 and it's the most beautiful place. There's a lot of white women struggling there. No, they're not struggling. I mean, they're rich. They're not struggling. I want to go to their thrift stores. Rob, Medical Police on Netflix.
Starting point is 01:13:59 Do it up. Treat yourself right. Yeah. How many eps? Ten eps. Ten eps in a half hour each? You got gotta finish it hour each you gotta fit it not even no it's like 20 minutes 20 it's good i saw it and it's real good it's real funny yeah we got 10 minutes of credits at the end 10 minutes you'll love it i saw some of it somebody was sitting next
Starting point is 01:14:15 to me on a plane was watching and i looked over and went someday they were watching it on a plane watch it someday yeah because you can if you have netflix you can download before right on the plane yeah and then yeah i'm really proud of it yeah i love it good job you're really good in it too oh man it's true he's good in it what am i what can i say he's good in it thanks buddy yeah you can you know get my stuff out on all those music places too i like him as the guy that almost ruined things between uh michael scott and holly flex yeah i did that. Yeah, you were in the middle of that love triangle.
Starting point is 01:14:47 What's confusing is that I did like two episodes of The Office but because that's on Netflix all these young kids are still enjoying The Office. It's such a good show. It's so weird though because all these kids will come up to me and my wife in real life, her name is Holly, but so people
Starting point is 01:15:04 come up to me and they go, they think they, her name is Holly, but so people come up to me, and they go, they think they're being funny, and they go, stop fucking with Holly. And it's like, really, you know,
Starting point is 01:15:11 in real life, that's scary. Like, I don't know who that is. It's intense every time, and they get the name right. Yeah. That's crazy.
Starting point is 01:15:18 So, I don't touch my wife. Doug Loves Movies is back here in two weeks we're going to generally be doing the second and fourth Tuesday of every month so you guys know
Starting point is 01:15:31 when to call me when you want to come back one more time for all my guests Noelle Wells Joelle Nicole Johnson Marcia Kasher and Rob Hubel
Starting point is 01:15:41 as always positive energy now it's time for Doug to watch another Bob Hubel. As always, positive energy. Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky. There's no room in his heart for you. Cause Doug loves movies.

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