Doug Loves Movies - Leonard Maltin, Sarah Silverman, and Shane Mauss Guest
Episode Date: September 16, 2014Doug welcomes film critic Leonard Maltin and comics Sarah Silverman and Shane Mauss to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19....com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, green and baby skitties.
He's with 50 as a top or colonel in his feet.
There's still not one that he won't see.
Because Doug loves movies!
Hey everybody, my name is Doug and I love movies.
This is Doug Loves Movies.
Coming to you from the UCB Theater in Los Angeles
on Tuesday, September 16th, 2014.
Wolf of Wall Street fight Terminator 2.
Judgment Day of the Dead Men Walking Tall.
The President's Men and Black Fisher King.
Ralph of Dog Day.
Afternoon Delight.
Sleep Perfect.
Murder by Death Wish.
Three Amigos.
World's End of Watch,
Men Don't Leaving, Las Vegas,
Food Law Jingle, All the Ways,
World's Fastest, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doomsday,
Zub Thunder, Bolt and Lightfoot,
Fist Way of the Gun.
Yeah.
Which features one of my guests tonight. But tonight but before i bring them out i just like
to note that um i uh heard from prize bag winner bill in lincoln nebraska apparently he came out
to los angeles saw taping of the show sam levine uh won on his behalf, I guess. And so he got the prize bag, which included a DVD of the movie The Game.
And then Sam and I had a bit of a back and forth about whether or not that movie holds up by today's standards.
And here is what my new friend Bill wrote.
And I quote, it's a pretty fucking stupid movie.
Thanks for the confirmation, Bill.
Austin, Texas, I'm doing a Douglas Movies
and a Benson Movie Interruption during Fantastic Fest.
I don't know if you need a badge to get in
or if you don't need no stinking badges,
but you can figure it out.
And the same with my shows at Just for Laughs in Toronto
on September 27th.
I think a festival badge gets you in, but
festivals are confusing.
Prize bag includes a Doug Loves
Movies t-shirt, a copy of Gateway Doug
2, some
cards to get you a free hot dog
from Pops.
And then a bunch of other stuff that we will
discuss and work through when I get these guests
out here, because I'm very excited.
Please give a big warm,
and by warm I mean,
let's just
talk about the fucking hot elephant
in the room.
The air conditioner is broken.
Yeah,
oh, you thought we just had it off for fun?
Or that it would kick
in sometime during the show.
Let's play the little hit or ball game
and then suddenly it gets really cold.
Yeah, the air condition's broken.
It's one of the hotter days of this late summer
here in Los Angeles.
So apologies to everyone that's here tonight.
And I'm just warning the listeners right now
that you're about to enjoy a very listless,
a very sad experience.
Please welcome Leonard Maltin, Shane Moss, and Sarah Silverman. I just woke up from such a dream.
Well, can I tell you something?
Can I congratulate you right off the bat?
Because you're the winner of the Pete Holmes game.
And that's which guest is going to speak first.
No.
You win.
Oh.
What did you say, though?
I forgot already.
I just woke up, like, 25 minutes ago from a nap.
You got over here fast
put yourself together nice
you know how when you set an alarm
you can give yourself a little label
like a note on it and just went
go
so you raced over here
oh good story
I didn't want to
Sarah Silverman everybody. She brought a Wreck-It Ralph tote bag, a bag thing. This
is Wreck-It Ralph on it. And then this amazing thing on the inside of it. It. Who wouldn't want oh look at the It's a terrarium.
Who wouldn't want
a Wreck-It Ralph terrarium?
Why is he on the side?
Like what's he doing?
I don't know.
It's broken.
Yeah.
It's weird.
Oh there he goes.
So anyway
so there you are
Strawberry Shortcake
and King Clown
those aren't their names
and
but all the fun characters from...
Who were the guys that did the donuts?
One of them was Richter, wasn't it?
Adam Carolla was the hot dog.
Anyway, all from Wreck-It Ralph.
All these fine figures in this lovely display case.
And it comes in a bag.
Oh, there's something else in here.
What's this? Oh, and it comes in a bag. Oh, there's something else in here. What's this?
Oh, I threw that in.
A bunch of toothbrushes?
Death creeps in through the gums, Doug.
I've been telling people that for a while.
It's true.
It doesn't get me a second date.
Also, a collector's edition
Blu-ray and DVD of Wreck-It Ralph.
And a...
In case that
Wreck-It Ralph wasn't enough for you.
It was in that bag.
The ultimate collector's edition
that's got a 3D cover.
You and Ralph are coming at us
on the cover there. That's amazing.
All of that is in there.
But then it turns out, you guys,
Mr. Leonard Maltin is here.
Woo!
And he brought
the final,
the last edition.
It's called the 2015 movie guy, Leonard Maltin's. And then, oh, the last edition. Yeah.
It's called The 2015 Movie Guide, Leonard Maltin's.
And then, oh, The Modern Era.
How long have you been saying that on there?
A couple of years now.
Since we decided we were modern.
No, no, it's because we put so many older films into the classic film guide, our companion book.
Right.
That we didn't want to mislead people who watch TCM a lot
that they'll find all those
old movies here, and they used to, but now
it's more in that book.
And the classic guide is going to retire as well?
No, the classic guide we're doing a new edition of for next
year, so all is not lost.
All right. And a lot of these movies will become
classic eventually. Yes, and many of
them will not. Like Hellraiser
Bloodline, which
came out in 1996 and you called
it a bomb. Strangely enough, it was directed
by the very talented Alan Smithy.
Yes.
Who has
spread his talent among many
films. Have you
ever counted them up? How many Alan Smithys
are in your guide? Well, there are a lot of TV movies
that we don't cover that have his name on them, too.
Speaking of TV movies, did you love that TV movie, The Girl Most Likely To, that was directed by Joan Rivers?
Joan Rivers.
I remember when it came on years ago, but I never saw it.
Oh, my God.
I saw it.
It's such a part of my childhood.
It's amazing in it, like award-worthy, but it was sort of overlooked because it was kind of a crazy movie at the time. It was about this woman
who just decided to...
She got plastic surgery and lap band.
She got everything. So she was turned
from an ugly, fat person to a beautiful,
thin person. And then she went back and killed
every man who'd done her wrong in her life.
And it was fucking sweet.
But it got a lot
of attention at the time.
That was when they used to have movies of the week
that was like the ABC movie of the week
it wasn't like a 200 channel universe
so every one of those movies
was very prominent at that time
Brian's song was a TV movie
oh sure
there's been some great ones
Trilogy of Terror of course
Steven Spielberg's Duel came out of that
that was a TV movie
what's the last movie to be in a Leonard Maltin guide Trilogy of Terror, of course. Steven Spielberg's Duel came out of that. That was a TV movie.
What's the last movie to be in a Leonard Maltin guide?
What's the most recent release that's in this edition? Actually, what's interesting is the most recent release in this edition is coming out this Friday.
It's already in here?
It's already in here, only because I saw it a year ago at the Telluride Film Festival,
and they were supposed to release it much sooner.
And the Weinstein Company,
as it sometimes does, sat on it for
a while and they're finally releasing it this Friday.
So it's a... That's gotta hurt.
You know what the Weinstein Company
is sitting on you.
Don't go there. Stop sitting on my
neck, Harvey. It's called
Trax. It's called
Trax and it stars the wonderful
Mia Wasikowska.
It's easy for you to say.
And who is good in everything I see her in.
She's just a really talented young actress.
She's the one who was in the new Alice in Wonderland.
Yeah, she did her best on that one. And she plays a real-life Australian woman
who crossed the Australian desert in the late 70s just by herself with some camels.
And Adam Driver's in it as a guy.
It was just her and a pack of cigs?
You know, I feel that even going further with my description.
People are going to lose interest in this movie you're raving about.
Doom to failure, but it's a really
good movie. Do you remember what you gave it?
Three and a half stars. Really good film.
I'm terrible at it.
You can do this. You used to do this.
Yeah, I used to do it all the time.
It's up there, I think. Yep, there it is.
Bam.
Three and a half stars. You called it.
It stars me a washer washer washer.
Eminently satisfying, you called it.
Yeah.
All right.
So that's the last movie in there.
Really good movie.
That's the distinction for them.
Have they been sent a plaque or something?
No.
Because that's a special thing they should know about.
I'm touting their movie.
I hope that's enough.
Hey, can you sign this copy for the winner tonight?
Sure I can.
Yeah, yeah.
Just write, you're a winner.
It doesn't matter who it ends up being.
I'll do that.
And the long-ignored Shane Moss is here, everybody.
Hello.
Hello.
Hilarious comedian who you might remember from one of the most disastrous episodes of the show ever,
where I thought a couple of DJs was a good idea.
And Shane was there to save it
comedically. But it was
a weird ass show, wasn't it?
Yeah, it was. Austin, Texas.
Three years ago. That long?
I think so. And you've appeared on the show here
since then. Yes. And tonight
you brought for the prize bag...
What? I brought a helmet
because I'm promoting safety.
Because it's also
something that was in your car
and you got here
and realized you needed a prize.
Also that.
And it's way better
than fast food wrappers.
Some of my favorite wrappers
choose fast food as a topic.
And I thought
and I was like well me coming out on crutches wearing a helmet, that might be a funny visual for your listeners.
Yeah, the listeners seem to have a really good time with that.
And I keep getting tweets about it.
But you do have an interesting story.
It's unrelated to movies, so we got to tell it quickly.
But you got into an accident after
recently appearing on Getting Doug with
High. Yeah, everyone thought it was right after
the episode,
because I was talking about going rock climbing.
It was a week or two later, right? Yeah, it was like five days
later. Yeah, there you go. Yeah, and I
went to Arizona
to visit some friends, Sedona, Arizona,
and I went for a hike,
and then my friend wanted to take this shortcut
that involved jumping off of a ledge that was too high,
and we talked me into it,
and I jumped off of a ledge.
This is in May, and I broke both of my heels.
And, yeah.
Usually when I say that, it brightens
the whole mood at a comedy show.
It's pretty hot in here,
but both of your heels aren't broken, you guys.
Yeah, your guys' face looked a lot like
when I had to crawl down a mountain
for three hours in the desert.
But I'm sure you're all
suffering without the air conditioning.
Seems horrible for you.
Were there any camels nearby?
No, I wish.
Okay.
I'm sure you saw...
Forget it.
I, um...
And I was sober at the time,
but I had some marijuana from you, and I...
You had some Blackout X pens thatens and we had given you yeah and i
accidentally snuck them into arizona because i was too high and forgot they were in my car
and then um and then i got down off of a mountain finally and i was like whoa look at that perfect
and i got high and it helped with my pain tremendously and uh and a lot of people thought
that i hurt myself climbing super baked after doing your show.
In reality, I wasn't
high when I did this. Had I been, I would have been too
scared to jump off of that thing. So this is
actually what happens when you don't
smoke weed, is you can break both
of your feet. There you go.
Also, if you had smoked pot, you would have
been able to fly.
I'm sorry,
Leonard.
What were you going to say?
Sarah, if you weren't high at the Emmys,
you might not have won, right?
Isn't that how that works?
Like, wasn't that part of the positive energy
that brought you the victory?
I wanted to guess at you, but it's so silly.
I'm such a lightweight.
I am an openly smoked pot,
but just like a little puff-a-rooney
here and there at the end of the night.
Had it in my purse to do so
at the end of the night.
And everyone made a big deal about it.
I was one of the sea of drunken,
scary people that were there.
Yeah, it's weird.
It's a really weird double standard.
Like, Leonard, you're high most of the time.
Let me ask you this.
Who else would produce a reference book for all these years?
Yeah, you've got to really be focused to do that sort of thing.
You've single-handedly given Doug and I so much pleasure
when we were high many years ago playing this game.
Yeah, we would play the Leonard Mullen game
instead of trying to move our lives forward
in a positive way.
True.
We both slept on a couch,
the same couch at a friend's house.
Yeah, that was weird, right?
Like for a whole summer.
But yeah, and Brian Posehn,
who I invited to be here tonight, of course,
he couldn't make it because, you know, he'd have to drive for more than 20 minutes.
Doug, can I ask you something?
Let me ask you something real quick.
You also brought some, for the prize bag, some Team Moulton buttons that have caricatures from South Park.
That's correct.
Yeah, so those are in the bag as well.
The episodes that they keep rerunning year after year. The gift that keeps on giving.
To me, anyway.
That's the name of the episode?
No, that's how I regard it.
Oh, okay.
It was so many years ago.
You get residuals on that, or you're just saying it gives you an extra bump in popularity?
An extra bump in popularity in street cred, yes.
I know you fucking love your street cred, Leonard.
You're all about street cred. When they first did this episode, which I can't even remember how many
years ago is, it's where
I helped defeat the Mecha Streisand
monster.
And I won
in so many ways.
I was actually heroic. I was portrayed heroically
in this episode. They didn't diss me.
And it just gave me
this tremendous free
publicity. And somebody said to me,
did they have to get your permission to do that?
I said, yeah, they got the same permission
they got from Barbra Streisand.
You were talking to a Teamster?
Who was that?
He may have been.
He may have been.
Can I mention something off-topic for a minute?
Please.
Well, all right.
I've just moved house, my family
and I, after 24 years in the same place.
And
you know that obviously I review
movies, and I've done that a long time.
But I don't review other things in general.
I don't review food. I don't review
rock concerts.
But I do want to say how
appalling the service
I've gotten from our good friends at AT&T has been in my mood.
And I have very little outlet, very little possibility of saying this anywhere but here on your podcast.
If you tweeted about it, people would probably raise up.
I mean, it's one thing to be lied to repeatedly.
It's another to have people not make good on their promises.
It's another to have them
screw up your lives
by not having phone service
or internet service,
which has been ordered
and confirmed, you know,
many days or weeks ahead of time.
But, you know, I don't want to,
I don't want to seem like
I'm coming down too hard on them.
Just as I try to be fair-minded
in reviewing a movie, I want to be fair-minded in reviewing a movie,
I want to be fair-minded in talking about these bastards.
Have you ever summarized a review that way
by saying, you know, I don't want to see another film
by these bastards?
No, but I'm open to the possibility.
All right.
What's the movie of the time right now?
What should people see today
if it's in their neighborhood at the Cineplex?
When is this dropping?
It'll be out tomorrow.
It'll pop tomorrow.
Well, Friday, there are several good movies opening.
Oh, here we go.
Let's get the scoop.
Liam Neeson's film, A Walk Among the Tombstones.
You liked that?
I did.
Really?
Yeah written and directed
by Scott Frank
who's very talented
as a writer and director
Cousin Matthew's in it
Did Scott Frank write
Out of Sight?
He did
I love that
He mostly adapted
Elmore Leonard's book
for that and for
Get Shorty
He did Get Shorty also
Probably was not involved
in Be Cool
And he got
and he wrote
and directed a great film in 2007 called The Lookout.
One of my favorite unsung movies with Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Matthew Goode and a lot of good people.
I haven't seen that. Have you guys seen that?
Oh, it's a terrific movie.
It was just before Joseph Gordon-Levitt really became a star.
He'd already been on Third Rock for years, but people didn't quite get his name as a young actor, as a young man.
People were just, yeah, they were used to him playing
a little girl. He eventually
had to cut that hair and be a man.
Yeah.
What about... Anyway, so
Walk Among the Tombstones is very good. Walk Among the Tombstones is
really good. Yeah. That's exciting, because
obviously it wasn't dumped in January,
but still September is a little bit of
a wasteland. It's probably a secondary wasteland
to January. Well, no, no, we're past the Labor Day wasteland.
But this isn't a war...
This movie isn't going to get awards, is it?
But it's excellent pulp.
It's solid. It's a solid film.
It's sort of a thriller whodunit.
I can't wait.
Because the ads, they're just...
Every movie Liam Neeson does now
just sells that he's going to kill everybody.
Right.
They're trying to pretend it's Taken 4 or something like everybody. Right. There's 100% it's taken for.
He's like, a walk amongst the tombstones.
I might as well kill everybody
here, and then it's a lot less labor
for everybody involved.
What about you, Sarah? Have you seen anything lately that's
awesome?
I watch television.
I haven't been to the movies in so long.
I watch Defending Your Life again.
Yeah. What one? Defending Your Life again. What one?
Defending Your Life I showed to my boyfriend.
He had never seen it.
What kind of boyfriend?
He's foreign.
Yeah, that's true.
And he liked it?
Loved it?
Yeah.
He agrees it's perfect.
Perfect?
Albert Brooks.
Yeah, Albert Brooks.
We love Albert Brooks.
Really in his stride.
But the supporting characters in it, like Rip Torn is amazing in that movie.
Oh, every single one.
Everybody's super good.
All right.
So if you haven't seen Defending Your Life ever, everybody watch it and then get back to us and let us know how great it is.
And there's a great documentary opening Friday called Keep On Keepin' On that Quincy Jones is executive producing and is helping to present.
And it's a really beautiful portrait of two amazing musicians.
One of them is very young, kind of a blind jazz piano prodigy named Justin Coughlin.
And the other is very old, Clark Terry, one of the greatest jazz trumpeters who ever lived.
And the two of them just connect and fuel each other in so many interesting ways.
And we follow them over five
years time and uh when justin begins when justin's in his teens and clark is in his late 80s and it
goes over five years it's just so moving and so wonderful keep on keeping on all right good luck
following that shane what have you seen lately well off, I would also like to say fuck AT&T.
Because why not?
More landlines, more problems.
They do not help you move house.
Which is an odd term I just heard today for the first time.
I gotta move house, motherfuckers.
I mean, are you the guy on the highway that's moving and the thing is split in two?
That would have been easier.
We wouldn't have had to pack.
But I saw, let's see, I saw Grand Budapest Hotel on Amazon Prime.
And I enjoyed that.
My mother, father, and sister all hated it.
And I think that added to my enjoyment of it.
They just don't, do you think they hate all Wes Anderson fare?
This is my mom's review of about any movie
that I would ever be interested in watching.
That was weird.
She's a Midwestern Wisconsin lady,
and everything's weird,
except she loves the worst things possible.
Like what's her favorite?
Not like morally bad things.
No, but just something that's terrible.
Oh, she likes a TV show
called Under the Dome.
That's not so bad, is it?
It's based on Stephen King.
His life.
He's stuck in a dome of celebrity.
And she just watches it with her eyes
wide open,
just like white knuckling every episode.
Because that dome situation could happen to her at some point.
Yeah, at any moment.
And then she's just like, that was weird.
She says it about good things as well.
I just spent the last three months living in my parents' basement because I couldn't care for myself.
In case you guys
wanted a little pick-me-up.
But are you
healing all right, then?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Because it's a heal.
You probably don't get enough of that.
They follow me a lot.
Let me sign that thing.
It's like they heal.
Doug Benson is such a wordsmith.
I watched Game of Thrones with my parents,
and that's uncomfortable.
With your parents' Game of Thrones?
Yeah, it was...
I was like, Matt, I do not remember
this cunnilingus scene going for so long.
It's just like, this is 15 minutes.
This is at least 15 minutes.
It was horrible.
I don't want to take that away from you, but
I said boys don't cry in the theaters
with my dad.
What was the funniest thing he said during it?
The whole time he was like this.
Oi!
Oi!
Oi!
Oi!
That's a lot to take in that movie
my daughter and I have something like a 15 year history
of seeing inappropriate movies together
and there's nothing to be done about it
if you don't know going in
you're not aware that this might be an awkward situation
for both the daughter and the father
and then we just shrug
and how do we do it again?
Well, we did it again. We're at another one of those movies.
Chuck it up to art.
Yeah, I guess so.
Do you remember the worst one? The most uncomfortable?
Oh, gosh.
Talk to her.
Oh, talk to her, yes. Pedro Almodovar's
Talk to Her. What happens in that?
Describe it. Your daughter's here.
I'd like to put you through the whole situation all over
again.
The vivid dream sequence where they walk into
the giant vagina? I think that may have been the scene.
That may be the scene she's
thinking of.
Oh, that's awesome.
I didn't know they had any walk-ins.
I thought they were any walk-ins.
I thought they were all drive-thru.
Doesn't make any sense.
Now it's part of the show where I say,
let the games begin!
We've got 19 minutes.
Half a tank of gas.
It's dark and we're saying... Wait, Leonard can't play this game.
He knows all the answers.
No, I'm the worst player of this game.
Really?
Yeah, really.
My mind just doesn't sort the information.
Because he's watching another movie tomorrow,
and then another one later that same day.
Yeah, but he knows he gave tracks three and a half stars.
He did know that, yeah.
But that was sort of a piece of trivia
he's probably been asked about on other shows
in other interviews. Because you do a lot of press
for this, especially this last one.
Got a lot of attention online, particularly.
Which has been very nice, very gratifying. Edgar Wright
posted a very sweet post that he was sad
about it being gone, but that he loved
that World's End got a good review.
Because you
really finally cracked your
code, and that's his first movie that you liked.
No, not the first.
Not at all.
Liar.
No, Shaun of the Dead gets a really good review, too.
Oh, that's true.
You're right.
He does remember, Sarah.
You're right.
He's pretending to not know this shit.
But everybody, please go pick a name tag
from somebody in the audience that you'd like to play for
and bring it back to your seat.
And while you do that, we'll do You Know What. And somebody bring a name tag from somebody in the audience that you'd like to play for and bring it back to your seat. And while you do that, we'll do you know what.
And somebody bring a name tag to Shane.
Thank you, Sarah.
Yeah, we'll be right back.
And we're
back.
Shane had a name tag handed
to him by Sarah because
of his heel situation.
I couldn't see what it was exactly
and I was like,
oh, that looks like
it might be something interesting
and then I got it
and I kind of want to give it back.
Wait, the guy spelled his own name
with ticket stubs from movies.
You don't think that's interesting?
Yeah, he used glue and stuff.
That's pretty cool.
Let me get a good picture of it.
Now I want to get the guy that had a thing that said joyish on it.
I thought that was enjoyable.
Well, here's an idea.
Why don't we get his name tagged, too,
and then two of them, once they've won the bag,
they can fight over its contents.
Does that sound good?
All right.
No, it doesn't.
Nobody likes that idea.
I'll stick with that.
You picked Ed. Stick with Ed.
Sorry.
Sorry.
That one, if you bring that back, do you live here in L.A.?
I do.
You do?
Yeah, bring that one back.
It'll get picked.
Paul F. Tompkins will pick it.
Sarah, who are you playing for?
Mike.
Let me see that thing.
It says Mike on it?
Yeah.
Like a rat that says Mike on it?
Yeah.
Okay.
Did you draw this, Mike?
I did.
That's really cute.
Good job, Mike.
And he's wearing a Doug Loves Movies T-shirt,
so I like that.
And what do you got here, Leonard?
I went for Yoda,
who was holding a picket sign that says,
Pick Jake, you will.
And I did.
You didn't even attempt to do the voice.
No, because
I would do it badly
and then that would just cause more mockery.
Pick Jake, you will.
Good job.
Good job, Jake. That is a good
name tag.
Actually, Ed picked
pretty good movies to put on here
and so I'd like to apologize to Ed.
Oh, wow, yeah.
He's got good taste.
How does he have these still?
I mean, he's seen a lot of shitty movies in the meantime,
and then put the show-offy ones on here.
How far back did they go?
What's the oldest one?
Punch Drunk Love?
There's Superbad is on here.
Punch Drunk Love?
Yeah.
That's a little old.
Children of men.
Yeah.
Oh, training day, 2001.
Whoa.
Love, actually.
That's an Academy Award winning ticket stub.
Yeah, these are very good ticket stubs, actually.
There you go.
All right, well, good job, Ed.
To determine who goes first in today's Letter Maltin game,
we are going to do a round of pre-recorded doing lines with Mark.
Mark Wahlberg.
How are you guys doing?
Do you want to do some lines?
Has pre-recorded a line from a classic motion picture.
And he's going to say it in a second.
And when he does, the first one of you that knows the name of the movie,
just say it into your microphone and you will win this game.
Mark?
All right, you guys want to do some lines?
Yeah, we already established that, Mark.
Well, unless you've got a cart hidden in the fat folds of your neck,
I can't help you.
Hey, that's me.
What's it called?
Wreck-It Ralph.
That's correct.
Alright, so Sarah,
as fair and squarely as it can be done,
gets to go
first today.
She gets to pick a category.
Then we'll go to
Shane and then to Leonard. to we'll go to Shane
and then to Leonard
Leonard's gonna take this thing home
Sarah would you like to play
you say Ferrera
I say Ferrara
the films of America
Ferrera and Jerry Ferrara
I hope I said their names right
is it pronounced America?
And, um...
It's a Jimmy Pardo joke.
Penny Dreadful, which is Penny Marshall movies
that Leonard gave two stars or less.
Oh, my God.
Or, at Bugs Bottom on Twitter,
suggested Snowpiercer.
And that's movies where someone is killed by an icicle.
Yeah, it's happened.
Which one of those would you like to play?
America and Jerry, Penny Marshall,
or Killed by an Icicle?
Penny Marshall.
Okay.
I'm glad you're excited about that one.
I'm not.
Okay.
I didn't like any of them.
Would you like a movie directed by Penny Marshall
from 1986 or 2001?
86.
Okay.
One and a half stars
from What's His Name?
He says this movie is about a computer programmer
he also says about this movie that
Michael McKean has an unbilled cameo
as a British party guest
I don't know if he's saying that the party was British
or the gentleman was British
but he was a British party guest
I don't know, but I could see
the excitement in it.
I could see your recognition.
Yeah, he maybe knows what it is, but this
is all about you right now.
Can you say it one more time? And Leonard listed,
let me tell you how many names they listed
in the app here.
Let me ask Leonard a quick question.
When's there going to be a new app?
We're trying to get one going.
Let's get one going and get the game in there as well.
We're trying to.
Like the reviews and the game.
Let's do it.
AT&T is the fucking worst.
Yeah, maybe we shouldn't have shit all over them before saying,
oh, and also we want to start an app.
Okay, so Leonard lists seven, eight, nine,
do you remember how many?
Twelve, fifteen,
I mean fourteen,
seventeen names.
Wow.
List a lot of names on this one.
So how many names do you think
you can get it in, Sarah?
Sixteen names.
That's a smart opening.
What is it about a computer programmer
that what?
Oh, you're trying to trick me into saying what else happens in the movie
no no it's just about a computer programmer
and Michael McKean is an unbuilt cameo
as you know the clues are
not very helpful
but Leonard seems to know it
Shane? 15
okay
Leonard?
12 yeah so that look of Shane? 15. Okay. Leonard? 12.
Yeah, so that look of recognition,
he sort of backed off of that a little bit.
I feel like he's tricking me.
12's a lot of names.
It's minus the five leads,
if there are five leads.
Just saying.
Yeah.
1984.
Directed by Penny Marshall.
86.
86, according to everyone.
I would have let it slide.
Would you say 12 names?
11 names.
10 names.
Quick bid Shane on the end.
This is 10 names, Leonard.
Shane, name that movie.
Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy.
I was born in 1980. Leonard's sitting this born in 1980 yeah so you were six years old
when this movie that Leonard Maltin
gave one and a half stars came out
about a computer programmer
and Michael McKean has an
unbilled cameo as a
British party guest I do love how you always
mention the unbilled parts and the cameos
and stuff and
your how many names does he get?
Ten?
Yep.
Ten names are Jamie Sheridan, Tracy Ullman,
Paxton Whitehead, James Belushi,
Tracy Reiner, Phil Hartmanman John Lovitz
Jonathan Price
Jeroen Krabe
Is that how you pronounce that, Leonard?
Jeroen Krab?
Jeroen Krab?
And that's it, right? Is that ten?
One more. This was no help.
Sarah Botsford.
Did I forget the genre, or did you just not say it?
I don't believe that we say the genre necessarily.
It was directed by Penny Marshall,
and she only directed one movie probably in 1986.
So Penny Marshall enthusiasts have probably figured this out.
That is not what this panel is.
I've made a terrible mistake.
Do you think you could name a movie directed by Penny Marshall?
I mean, I'm not going to give you bonus points or anything.
I do not know who that is.
It happens sometimes let me give you a hint
Shlemiel
Shlemazel
she was Laverne and Shirley
on that show
and then she's
oh okay
Rob Reiner's her brother
and she
Gary Marshall
Gary Marshall's her brother
Rob Reiner is her son
her grandson
is
Alf
it's too hot in here
do you want to guess anything?
half of those actors
I can't believe I wouldn't remember
something with all of those actors.
Yeah, it's pretty, you know, Leonard gave it
one and a half stars. It's not
memorable. Yeah.
86.
Don't worry too much about it.
No, I got nothing.
Are we gonna
Are we gonna what? Can I ask a good question?
Sure. Is it over? It's over, yeah.
Is the lead actor no longer with us?
Oh, no, she's with us.
Now?
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, backstage?
She tells me almost every weekday
to take some time to enjoy the view.
Oh, I know what it is.
What?
It's that Eden movie.
No, it's Jumpin' Jack Flash starring Whoopi Goldberg.
Oh, you're right.
Now, what's her name back on?
She's probably the one who says that.
Yeah, I haven't seen The View since Rosie came back.
I remember that movie.
I liked that movie.
There you go.
Jonathan Pryce was like her love interest, wasn't it?
Stephen Collins was in it.
Carol Kane.
Annie Potts. I mean, it was a dream team. in it. Carol Kane, Annie Potts.
It was a dream team.
They got Potts?
They got Potts.
That means that Leonard Bolton
is on the board, right?
You challenged.
Shane couldn't do it.
I'm a fool.
We're going to start with Sarah
and then go to Leonard
and try to get this over
quickly before anybody melts completely.
Sarah?
Yes, my love? It's Amy Poehler's birthday
today. It is? Founder of
this sweat box. Oh my god!
It was her idea for this to happen to us.
The air guy's on the roof right now.
Yeah, he's working on it.
Happy birthday, Amy.
Happy birthday, Amy.
And so it's the films of Amy Poehler.
Films of Amy Poehler.
Or, this is a fun category,
A Prairie Home Companion.
That's films that have bestiality in them.
Or, spoiler alert, that's movies where someone is run over by a car.
You're suddenly thrown up over the spoilers, I assume.
Which one of those would you like to play?
Let's go Amy Poehler.
All right.
Honor of her birthday.
Yes.
Wow, that applause was like she just died.
Two and a half stars from Leonard for this movie from 2004.
He says this movie has funny moments one doesn't usually find in this kind of movie yeah
unfortunately
he says it reverts to formula
but
still a cut above
the norm
hence the two and a half stars
the review might as well have said
yeah I gave it two and a half stars
and he lists half stars. The reviewer might as well have said, yeah, I gave it two and a half stars.
And he lists seven, nine,
twelve
names. How many names
can you get it in, Sarah?
2004?
Amy Poehler's in it.
I'll say
that I would name that in
twelve. Okay. Leonard? I'll say that I would name that in 12
okay
Leonard
10
Shane switch the order around
now I'm getting it
Amy Poehler
big fan that wasn't that long ago
I'll challenge Leonard.
How many names did you say?
Ten.
All right.
I feel pretty good about a Leonard Maltin win right here.
Bringing us in, dare I say, early enough for me to not have to apologize to anybody.
Your ten names are
Neil Flynn,
Daniel Franchese, Lizzie Kaplan, Jonathan Bennett, Amanda Seyfried,
Oh, gosh.
One, two, three, four, five.
Lacey Chabert Amy Poehler
Anna Gasteyer
and Tim Meadows
I think that's the right amount of names
I should know but I can't get the name
oh
oh Leonard
I can't get the name
I can't get it out of my brain
come on Leonard you can do it Oh, Leonard. I can't get the name. I can't get it out of my brain.
Oh, come on, Leonard.
You can do it.
For the lack of air conditioning.
Oh, I know.
This does not make it easier.
If they turn the heat off on Jeopardy, they'd all be like, oh.
What is, oh?
All right, well, I can't say that I blame you because it's a bunch of people in the smaller roles in this film.
And maybe you recall the title also
if you were, you know, at any point in your life a teenage girl.
Because it's Lindsay Lohan, a classic, Mean Girls.
Ah, of course.
Mean Girls.
Of course.
Yeah, and Amy Poehler's hilarious in it
as her mother.
Funnier than the real mother. Rachel McAdams,
yeah.
I think it's the only movie she was ever
in where she didn't fuck a time traveler.
Shane Moss is on the board, everybody, with one point.
Sarah, this is yours to tie up
Sarah gets to pick another category
this time we will go to Shane after Sarah
first option is
IMDB of course we all know that
IMDB but these are movies
that
these are movies
that
the title is
the initials D.B.
First words
D, second words begins with B.
And then Eric R. Stevens
suggested, and I've mentioned it many
times now because people shy away from this category,
Meals on Wheels.
And that's movies where there is oral sex
in a car.
And then a gentleman, I assume, named Benjamin Salas suggested Pie.
This is a really interesting one.
Pie.
And that's a movie that Leonard gave three stars and listed 14 names.
Oh, wow.
Pie.
Boy, that's precise.
Yeah, right?
That's amazing.
I had to look for that.
Didn't take too long, but still a bit of a search.
What are the first two?
I liked one of the first two.
The movie's title is The Initials DB or Oral Sex in a Car.
I'll go with IMDB.
All right.
Would you like a movie that says The initials DB From let's see 1981
97 or 98
Uh
Apologies to put your hands together
98
Here we go
My 21st birthday
Leonard or whoever he bought off to watch this piece of shit
Called it a bomb This movie is a bomb I like to watch this piece of shit called it a bomb.
This movie is a bomb.
I like to say this sort of thing when it happens.
It's only 83 minutes long.
Wreck-It Ralph is longer than 83 minutes, I bet.
Feature films...
What the fuck is that supposed to mean?
Cartoons, animated films are about 75 to 90 minutes,
as Leonard will attest.
So is this an animated movie?
No.
You narrowed it down a little bit, didn't you?
Is it?
It's not.
It's definitely not animated.
You just forced a clue out of me.
He says about this movie
that the director's cut runs 94 minutes.
What's the genre?
The studio cut it down to 83
because they were worried people would be bored.
From 94.
The genre is none of your business.
But Leonard also calls it predictable,
coldly calculated, and trendy.
Yeah, all of those things.
And the title is the initials DB.
And he lists eight people.
Eight people
stepped up and appeared on camera in this.
I'll name it in seven.
Smart opening
bit. Shane?
I feel like it's an easy category,
but
that description is pure shit.
Congratulations to everyone here tonight who wore shorts.
This is like almost dangerous weather.
Like, I'm worried about Leonard.
This is like almost dangerous weather.
Like I'm worried about Leonard.
Did you guys know that Sarah and Leonard made out once?
It's a true story.
Look it up online.
It went viral.
I'll challenge Sarah because I don't have... I love it.
I think we got a three way tie in our hands
yeah yeah yeah that's what I'm thinking
I feel really good about this but maybe she'll get it
I have some faith
oh shit what just happened
okay good
do I have a point
no no you're about to if you get this
no I don't see it happening
here's your seven out of eight names.
Ethan Embry.
Yeah.
Tobias Mailer.
Steve Railsback.
Bruce Greenwood.
William Sadler.
Nick Stahl.
And Katie Holmes.
This movie's title is the initials DB.
And it doesn't have the word Cooper after it.
DB.
Uh-huh.
D.
D.
Death.
Diary.
Data. Yeah. death diary data you always go right for diarrhea
don't you
I said diarrhea
I know but close enough
I keep a diarrhea
dear diarrhea
it's the great Katie Holmes movie.
I'm gonna have to call it.
No!
Give me that.
Give me that.
Give me that.
Dark?
Duh-buh.
This movie starts with duh buh
it's called database
oh no it isn't
it's called
disturbing behavior
and the top billed person
was James Marsden
and
that is a very tough one
but that makes
Shane our winner
everybody
he did it
pulled it out in this heat incredible That makes Shane our winner, everybody. He did it.
Pulled it out in this heat.
Incredible.
He was a heel above the rest.
Hey, that's not a saying. Doesn't make any sense.
Yeah, that's not even an expression.
That'd be like half an inch or something.
I'm going to do my plug first.
It's very simply douglosmovies.com.
Go there and all my stuff is there.
Is there a shithead
on the back of your Yoda sign here,
Mr. Maltin?
Yeah, there is.
Oh, who's that?
And Sarah,
is there one on the back of yours?
Can you pass it down to me there?
Thank you.
Ed, come get your prizes.
Congratulations.
Try not to rub it into Jaws face you know that guy is cuz yeah
he almost was played for oh yeah and there you go there's a copy oh yeah I
put one in the bag oh yeah this one's for me right yes thank you I forgot to I
was gonna bring in an old one today cuz I think I have one from an embarrassingly long time ago
that I was going to bring in and have you sign,
but I will cherish this one.
Did you sign this one?
Well, let's see if I signed the right one.
I signed one.
Oh, you signed one to the winner.
Okay, yes.
Yeah, that's one of the bad ones.
This is unsigned, so you can still sign.
Personally.
You can still sign that for me.
And it's available where people buy books now.
Anywhere books are sold. Anywhere books are sold, this is being sold.
Anywhere books are sold, you can get a copy.
Anything else you got coming up?
Here, use the Sharpie.
You're going to be in, whatchamacallit, Fantastic Fest in Austin, correct?
Yes, I'm heading there Friday, and I'm going to be a juror at Fantastic Fest,
their 10th anniversary edition in Austin, Texas.
And I'm on the comedy jury, which is called
The Gut Busters.
I was on that jury a couple years ago
and saw some of the most disgusting things I've ever
seen in movies, so good luck with that.
Because Fantastic Fifth is really crazy movies.
I saw one of the films the other
night and guts
were literally busted in it.
There's a lot of violence and nastiness
and it's a lot of fun. But I'm looking forward to it. Yeah, yeah. There's a lot of violence and nastiness, and it's a lot of fun.
But I'm looking forward to it.
Yeah, it should be great.
I'll be there, and I will say hi,
and you'll be like, you know,
you'll do that thing when we run into each other
in the real world where you ignore me.
And then...
Wouldn't that be weird?
And my website is LeonardMalton.com.
Oh, okay.
All day, all night.
Wow. Oh, okay. All day, all night. Wow.
Sarah,
you got any movies in the can?
I do.
Yeah, what's up? What's coming up?
I don't know.
I'm going to be in Austin on Sunday.
Are you going to be in Austin on Sunday? Oh, that's right.
Oddball Festival.
Yeah, Sunday at the Austin 360.
Dallas Friday.
Houston.
Is this coming up over there? Houston Saturday and Austin Sunday.
Have the oddball shows been fun to do?
Yeah, really fun.
The traveling sucks.
But the huge crowds must be so exhilarating to talk to that many people at once.
It is because the sound, it's not usually my cup of tea, like 15,000
people, but first of all,
it's all headliners, so there's no pressure.
Even if you suck, you know that they're getting
a great show.
And then the sound
is great, and that's all that matters.
And they have big cameras
with big screens, so it
feels intimate. You can be quiet
and everyone can hear you.
Nice.
Sorry.
I can't wait to enjoy your quiet comedy.
She's the librarian of comedy.
And Shane, what do you got coming up, buddy?
I have a new Netflix hour special mating season
you can check out and rate it five stars.
Even if you thought it was four, just rate it five.
Yeah, watch a couple minutes of it.
If you don't dig it, give it five stars and move on.
Yeah, yeah.
It's easy to do.
And I have a killer road schedule coming up, Doug.
Let me tell you about it.
I'm going to Reno and then Livonia, Michigan,
and then Myrtle Beach, and then Toledo, Ohio.
After that, things are going great.
I can't figure out why comedians kill themselves.
Things are going really well.
It's a mystery.
Things are fantastic.
Well, yeah.
Well, good luck with that.
And you're at Shane Comedy on Twitter because
Moss is spelled M-A-U-S-S.
I thought it was confusing
to people.
Good call.
You'll be dead, Moss.
Too bad that wasn't
on mic.
Thank you.
That's why you did that. That's why you didn't pick up your
microphone. You're like, I'm not sure about this one
thank you once again
to Shane Moss, Sarah Silverman and Leonard Maltin
and as always
Chuck Pagano
is a shithead
sports
sports you didn't read it aloud Pagano is a shithead. Sports. Sports.
Okay.
Yeah.
You didn't read it aloud, but I get to read it out loud.
And then, also, as always, the Uber driver that talked to us about L. Ron Hubbard on our way here is a shithead.
Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie.
Eyes unfolded, viewing prowess makes him cocky.
There's no room in his heart for you,
cause Doug loves movies!