Doug Loves Movies - Live at the Del Close Marathon (Bonus)

Episode Date: August 1, 2010

In this 30-minute special edition podcast recorded live at The Del Close Marathon 2010 at UCB-NY, Doug welcomes Matt Besser, Matt Walsh, Amy Schumer, and Seth Morris to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers screaming baby sticky seeds With 50 azepop or kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Cause Doug loves movies Hey everybody! My name is Doug and I love movies! My name is Doug and I love movies. Welcome to a very special edition of the Doug Loves Movies podcast coming to you in front of a live audience at the UCB Theater in New York. During the Del Close Marathon, an annual event that they do every year, because it's an annual event.

As soon as you call something an annual event, you're locked in. You have to do it every single year. And I'm so excited about all the name tags that people have on. It's fantastic. One guy put his name on his iPhone in big letters. That's cute. The other guy's got a Storm Trooper, but with his name on it. What does it say? Galen? Alright.

Galen, the loneliest Storm Trooper. I got thrown out because I have a name that doesn't fit in. I mean, amongst stormtroopers, you've got to imagine they don't have very interesting names. If they've already chosen a life of putting on a helmet and looking like everyone else. Let's bring out the guests. As always, we get some fantastic guests when we come to the Delphos Marathon. Two of these dudes were in it last year. One of these is not a dude. And another one is an old friend of mine who I've never had on the podcast, so it's exciting to finally get him on.

Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Matt Walsh, Matt Besser, Andy Schumer, and Seth Forrest! So yeah, that was Matt Besser. And Andy Daly couldn't make it. I'm not an internet person. Is this live on space right now? No, it's not like streaming or anything like that. It's just, that's Seth Morris' voice for the listeners. It's just, it comes out, or plops, as I like to say, several days after we do this. the only one that says that.

...do this. When are we dropping this thing? When are we dropping it? When are we going to shit this thing out? I say it plops. Oh, okay. That's what I like to say. When are we going to drop this off at the pool?

Instead of dropping it. Let's talk about movies for a quick second before we get into some of the games and the nice folks that wore name tags will get to it. The top drops. See, I would say King Plops. King Plops.

One more exception, right? You got that. Okay. Third level. I was in the third level of dreaming with you. These are all projections, right? My foot will pass through this guy's head, right?

Yeah, just give him a good kick. Doug, is it appropriate to talk about the weirdos with names on their shirts right now? They're not weirdos. They're fans of the show. Tomato wants a weirdo. They might be weirdos, they're fans of the show. Tomato looks a weirdo. They might be weirdos, but we don't know that for sure.

It's very game-showy. It looks like they're being surprised. We don't know that for sure. I feel like 92% sure that they're weirdos. Well, you guys are like Mr. Wheel of Fortune people. What are Benson groupies called? Doug-a-ruggies? Gruggies?

What are these? That's a great one. Do you have a name for your army of fans? I have no, I don't name my army of fans. Dougies? How about Dougies? Yeah, that's very good. Doug-outs.

Like Doug-outs. Doug-outs! We did it! Holy shit! Doug out just sounds like it's a bunch of gay dudes that are like Yeah, get in the Doug out.

Doug out like Doug. Doug out is the little pot pipe with a little Yeah, yeah. burr ass. But look, like they are like legit name tags. It looks like some work's been done.

But these people kind of just last minute look like they threw it together. Well, it's, you know, it's the spirit that counts. Man, that guy's been working a month on this. No, I'm not. I'm not getting it. I'm talking Virginia Blake over there. It's like stick figures. You guys really phoned it in.

All I'm saying is I don't mean this in a racist way. Don't throw in your name tags, you guys. Don't put them on your forehead like Katie over there. I don't mean this in a racist way. I really don't. But people with giant name tags on their shirt are kind of all the same. Like, you know what I mean? It could be anything.

Eskimos. You mean Eskimos. Let's get some tattoos. They kind of are all everything over here with the name tags. Maybe I want to do that. Oh. That's so dug out. Right there.

That's so dug out. Dug out. Dugout! I got the song. And for people who can't see it, it's green like weed. You just do the song Wipeout and you say the word dugout instead of wipeout. No, no, no, no, no. Dugout! Does anybody remember this video? I remember this famous drummer who I don't remember. Dave Grohl.

Dave Grohl. No, no, no. Buddy Rich. Buddy Rich. This was like 80s. Ringo Starr. But listen, Ringo Starr. The video was John Bonham.

I remember. I remember. The one-armed drummer from earlier. John Bonham! Think of Woods! Aldo Nova's drummer. Anybody else? Liberty something.

Anyway, the guy who played Wipe Out on Girl's Butts in the video. Think of Lutz! Aldo Nova's drummer. Anybody else? Or Liberty something. Anyway, the guy who played Wipe Out are girls butts in the video. He was like... That's Bud Bongo, right? Whatever his name was, I loved him when I was a junior high. That's how it's turned into Bud Bongo. Is this...are we talking about movies yet? No.

I said the top drops. That was very insightful. That was a whole controversy. It didn't drop or not. Have you seen it? Yeah, I did see it. What do you think? I'm very saddened by it.

Why? Why is it sad? Because I went into it thinking this could be the best movie I ever saw. Oh, wait, you did not like it. I didn't like it. I love the movie. Everybody loves it. Everybody loves it. Listen, I saw...

You be quiet, all of you. All of you. Henry loves it? I was not excited about the trailer. I'm not so much of like a, oh my... You know what I mean? Like people that'll pay... Who's paid to just go and see a trailer?

I mean, fuck you, really. That's weird. That's a weird thing to do. But anyway, people were all jazzed. And I did not expect much, but I really liked it. They showed the first ten minutes of Dark Knight before I Am Legend in IMAX. And that was the best thing that ever happened to me.

And then I had to sit through I Am Legend. But yeah, I got very excited by the Inception trailers, because I love you know, Christopher Nolan, I love What's His Nuts? Ellen Page was on my podcast, so I was very hyped about Inception, and then

I just couldn't get into it. Really? It was extremely disappointing. So you don't have a heart, is what you're saying. I think people don't have a heart, because I don't think it's very emotional at all. I think they try to make it emotional. He was trapped in the third level

by his love. I feel like I did not go to that movie stone, and if I had, I would have, probably my mind would have exploded. So maybe it was that that wasn't possible

to follow. People love to say to me, they either go, you weren't high enough or you were too high or I say it like it. They can't decide which one. Like, I gotta get it

just right in order to enjoy a movie, a thing that I've been doing since way before I smoked pot. I did not enjoy it. And then the other one is, how did you see it? Was it in IMAX? Was it in 3D? Was it in this? Was it in that?

And it's just like, relax, I know how to see a movie. Totally. It's like they keep raising the stakes of like, did you see it in 3D? Yeah. Well, did your seat move while you fucking saw it in 3D? I'm a fan of 2D. Can I out you as a theater-goer right now? I love the theater.

I've been watching Doug for many months. He actually got me the job. That makes him a theater-goer? No, no, no, no. If you're in a play, you're going to the theater. No, he goes and sees a lot of plays. He's a guy you would not expect, but you see a lot of theater.

I love theater. I love theater. That's a nice podcast. Don't love theater. Oh, coming from the guys who spell from their business theater with a T-R-E. I never approved that. You see? I never approved that. You never approved it.

When I get on that website looking for it, I go E-R. Well, that's funny, bro. That's funny because I worked for you, and I misspelled it once, and you reprimanded me for not going right to... Whoa! That's because I could, and I did. Jog out! In the house.

I think we did R-E-N-E-R just to make sure everybody found it. What other movies? I love Toy Story. I haven't seen it. I love Despicable Me. Despicable Me was wonderful.

Can I hear that sex one? Oh, it's Joan Rivers' documentary. That's really good. You guys like film?'s Joan Rivers' documentary. That's really good. Right, you guys like film? Joan Rivers has a documentary. You fucking sheep. I'm kidding. Come on, guys.

Somebody just got tossed. Somebody got thrown up by their head. Is that right? I thought I creeped everybody out. There's more weirdos over here. Natalie loves Doug, loves movies. They're dugouts, Seth. Call them by their name. No, I know. I just, I guess I'm upset because I made a bunch of Benson Nation t-shirts under

that. It's because they were camouflaged, dude. I called Seth today and I was like, is there any chance you can come down and call fans of the podcast weirdos? I called Seth today and I was like, is there any chance you could come down and call fans of the podcast weirdos? It'd be really awesome if you could come and do that for me. Oh, come on. That's their, you know, the jewel in their crown, right? You're cooler than everybody else. I get it.

R.E. Seth. R.E. We're right to go! Oh, let's do it. You fucking lemmings! Alright, let's play build a title. We gotta do this. Natalie, give me a title of a movie, please. Any movie.

Hocus Pocus. And then a movie that makes sense in this context. Two brilliant superhero movies. Because there's not other movies that make a focus or a good focus. Kathy and Jimmy at her finest. Good call. Chaka Zulu.

Pat Fiddler. All right, next drawing. Joan Rivers. Henry, Henry, name a movie. Toy Story. Toy Story. All right, nice trying. Joan Rivers. Henry, Henry, David Looney. Toy Story. Toy Story. All right. Toy Story,

Bill. Toy Story, Bill. And then it goes down to Matt. I have to go, Bill? You have to start with Bill. Oh my Lord.

Or end with Toy. Villanova, Jimmy Valvano, dead of cancer. Toy Story. I think the judges are accepting it, though. I hear a lot of chatter in the booth. I think the problem is, I don't know what it is to accept.

I don't know what it is to accept. I don't know what just happened. You just start giving your opinion. Alright, I'm gonna use my one pass. Okay, yeah, so then you're out. Pass out. It's a toy, right? She has to start with a Ville or end with a story. Yeah, it's something that ends in toy or ends in Ville. The Toy Story Ville or end with the story. Yeah, something that ends in toy or begins in Ville. The Toy Story Ville.

I said it! No, you said Toy Story. I said The Toy. The Toy, the movie. The Toy Story Ville. Nothing ends in the. Why do you say the? Is that a new rule? It's not a new rule. It's always been a rule. You remove the the from the title because... You fucking idiot.

That would be a stopper on that end. Keep moving. Nothing ends in the except for nights in Rodentha. Oh, wow. Alright, so do you have one, Amy? I don't know what's happening. Yeah, you don't know what's happening. Okay, so do you have one, Amy? I don't know what's happening. Yeah, you don't know what's happening. Okay, so remind me again. End in story?

Yeah. The Pete Maravich story. Wait, no. End in bill or starts in toy. Or ends in toy, starts in bill. Okay, hold on. Okay, hold on, everybody. The toy, Richard Pryor. The toy, Richard Pryor.

That's what we were talking about. Guys, on, anybody. The toy, Richard Pryor. That's what we were talking about. Guys, guys, guys, guys. I said no! The toy, Richard Pryor. Thank you. Thanks, Daffy Duggo. So what does that mean? What do I have to do? You have to do Phil.

You have to ruin this game any way you possibly can. Stay swing loud and commit to it. Everybody goes nuts. That's because they're fucking robots. Alright, Seth, go. The zoo movie. Village. Can anybody think of a movie that ends in toy? The Christmas Toy.

Yeah, Youth Party War, like Village. That was the sequel to Richard Pryor's The Village. Oh, Village. People get invited to Village. Yeah, is that of the world. That was the single version prior to the village. Oh, village. People get invited to the village. Is that good enough? Can I win? For village. Toy Story Village. There's still an E in there.

And then I go, Age of Innocence. Ooh. Toy Story Village of Innocence. That's fucking Jimmy Snuka from the top row. Boom. So, something that starts in innocence. Jimmy Snuka from the top row boom so something that starts in innocence everybody knows that old movie

innocence or guiltiness class pick straight to DVD that's not me Amy what do you got? It's the Begin of Innocence? It's the Begin of Innocence or Sense?

Oh. Oh. Cynchus is a brilliant guy! No! No! I'm not it out! No, I said it first! Cynchus, I'm not even you! I'm hurtling over fans! Look, I'm Jordan Norman That's bullshit! I'm talking to you! I'm hurling over fans!

Look, I'm Jordan Gordon-Levitt! You are... Oh my god! He freaks out walking all over the place! There's nothing more exciting than one guy floating in a hallway for 40 fucking minutes! What an exciting, emotional movie. Got to tie up.

The stakes are pretty high, bro. The stakes are pretty fucking high. Because if you ever kill that guy, the rest of his life is ruined. Do you know how many projections he defeated? Do you know how many projections he defeated? He probably defeated 50 projections, dude. That's an emotional moment.

49, pretty emotional. 50 projections, dude. That's an emotional moment. 49, pretty emotional. 50, very emotional. Doug, I'm going to a funeral for your imagination. But if... If our imaginations were so important, then you'd be able to actually have stuff to think about while you're watching that movie. I was bored.

I don't know why. I really do feel like movies are sort of like where you're at. I'm talking about movies. What? Why do you have an opinion about that? You've never seen a movie where you're like... You're really attacking the dugouts, man. Well, listen.

I bring truth to power. I don't want us to ever rest on our laurels, you know? I don't believe in fascism. Not that Doug would do it, but these fucking robot sheep... They're ready to follow anybody. I mean, really. Which one of these robot sheep would you like to play for, Seth? Pick one. Pick somebody. Go! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! Galen! GalALEN! I like Galen. Oh, of course.

Okay, Seth is playing for Galen the Stormtrooper. And Amy, who would you like to play for? Um... Do they have to have a name tag? Yeah, that's the idea. They went to all the trouble. Oh, look at that. No. Henry kind of turned on you, so nobody trusts him anymore.

I'm going Jen. She's pretty. She's got a cute rat. Look at that. No. Henry kind of turned on you, so nobody trusts him anymore. I'm going Jen. She's pretty. She's got a cute rat. What? I said something about a rat because I care about this country. I don't know what you mean. Did you guys know there was a war on? That's yeah, right.

Two, guys. Now you can vote in two years. Matt Walsh, who would you like to play for? That's the other one. Two. Two guys. Two more. Now you can vote in two years. Matt Walsh, who would you like to play for? I was thinking maybe Kathy. She seems really... Oh, Katie. Katie. Katie. We're going to do this, Katie.

On your shoulders. All right, I'm going with Henry, the digital name tag. For a second, it wasn't going to pay off for Henry, but fortunately it worked out. He held it up there the whole time. He had to get it to him. Yeah, he's great. Lord, I'm sorry, Henry. I can't believe he gets service in this basement.

In this basement, see you, Trey. Okay, so Don't disturb his dog. It's his party. Let's play Letter Mold Game. John and Princesses Kathy, Henry,

Galen, and somebody else. Jen. Jen. Jen! I am not good at this game. Jen, don't fuck up.

Okay, let's start with you then, Matt. Carl Malden. Would you like to... I can guess this movie in... That's not how it works. I got it. I got it. You've been on the podcast more than anyone else.

We gotta hear the thing first. Yeah, do you want to play a musical biopic, a western, or a war movie? Oh, I think I'll go western. Okay, western. And would you like it to be from 2007, 2008, or 1985? Super old school on that one. Nineteen... Okay, then...

85? 19-2000. Leonard Walton gives this Western from 1985 three stars. I would go three and a half, personally. He calls it sprawling and well-made. And he says that, uh... Um...

Oh, and offers ample entertainment by throwing in everything but the kitchen sink. So there's no kitchen sink in this movie. At no point does anyone ever make prepared dishes for eating off of.

And there are 12 names. Matt Besser, how many names do you think you can get it in? I can get this in at least 12 names. I'm going to say eight names to get it going. Matt Walsh, how many names? Can I pick a number? I'm going to go... It has to be below eight. I'm going say eight names to get it going. Matt Walsh, how many names? I'm gonna go... It has to be below eight.

I'm gonna go three. Whoa! You guys can call him out. Yeah, now Amy, you can either say, name that movie, or bid less names. Uh... Bullshit. No, no, no. I'm sorry. I wasn't clear about your choices.

I'm just good at it. I'm just about your choices. Name that movie. Okay, you say name that movie? Alright, now watch. You're an imposter, just so you know. You're an imposter. Alright, this is, Len gave it three stars. It's from 1985. It says it's sprawling, well made, and has everything but the kitchen sink. When he's wrong, what happens? Twelve names.

Amy will get the point. Woo! Yeah. Jen and her group are very excited. Evented Schumer. Alright, so, uh, Matt, and then your names are Jeff Fahey, the incomparable Jeff Fahey. Don't know him. Uh, he's, he's good.

He's got weird eyes. He's got, like, super blue eyes, I think. Okay. The Dreamy. Lynn Whitfield. Don't know him. Black Lady. Black Lady.

Black Lady? Is that who you think? Uh-oh. And then your third name is Joe Seneca. Who's Joe Seneca? He's your third name. All right, I'm just going to go with my gut here and I'm gonna say Silverado. That is correct!

Yeah! Go, Boone! I'm trying to go three. Go Six! You cheated, Silverado! Go Six! Nobody knows Go Sitka, just thinkica's mom doesn't know him! I know one western from the 80s and that's it.

Alright, we're starting with Seth Morris. Would you like a western, Seth? A war movie? Or a movie featuring your favorite actor and mine, Leonardo DiCaprio. He's kind of short. Yeah, I'll do that. He doesn't have many movies. All right. You don't get any choices. Maybe it's just war.

He does not. Is that not true? War has one more movie than Leonardo DiCaprio. What? War has one more movie than Leonardo DiCaprio. Just one, yeah. It's in production. Technically, it's in production. Take it back. You guys are not cheap.

You have an optimistic outlook. That was a smart joke, if you guys fucking... Whatever. I mean, you know. All right, Seth Morris. Your movie's from 1993. Len gave it two and a half stars. Again, Glenn is being very hard on these movies, isn't he? He calls it a middling slice of life.

Middling. What a weird word to start with, Glenn. And then he says there are some poignant vignettes. This is how he describes it. And there are 11 names. How many names can you get in it, Seth Morris? I can get into six names. Now we come down here to Matt. I can get, can you say zero names? Wait a second. Now, Matt Walsh, you can say negative names. Less than zero. Negative names.

Wait, I know about negative names! I'm going with negative names. You have to then name the names and the movie title. How many? That's hard. You could say even one name it one, if you, one negative name. I'll do negative name right now! No, it's two negative names! Alright, so I have to name one actor in the movie, and then name the title. I'm gonna gamble. You think you could do it? Why not? Okay, so you say one name. Negative one name. Alright, so back to Amy.

I will name the title and one actor in the movie. Do you think you can name more actors in the movie and the title? No. Okay, so say to Matt, bullshit or whatever it is you want to say. What the fuck, Matt? What's he got? Eats my shit. Okay, eat your shit.

Matt Walsh, name one name and then the name of the movie. In any order? Yeah, whatever you want. Alright, I'll go with my better guess. Gilbert Grape? Then who was in it? Leonardo. Leonardo.

Technically you said it was someone you wanted to do. Doug Ops? Alright. One other actor? One other person that was in Gilbert! I don't know! Johnny Depp! Johnny Depp!

Matt Walters is our winner. Who are you playing for, Matt? I play for the lovely Katie. Lovely Katie! Katie, where are you from? Where are you at Katie? You gotta study the rules. Alright, oh, I need more. That's so weird that I'm moving.

Matt, that's where you gotta study the rules. You gotta know the negative side of the game. I wish I knew negative. I knew every actor that moved me. Please be quiet during the prize giveaway. Can I change to a playboy? There was a really fat lady was in it. John C. Reilly was in it. There was a treehouse. Okay, Christopher Glover was in it. Katie gets a two-trunk-to-tweet t-shirt, and she also gets my CD Sted Benson Professional Humor Union. And I'm going to put it on the floor.

My new CD comes out on August 31st. It pops on August 31st and it's called Hypocritical Oath. Oath. Oath. O-A-F. And do you guys have anything that you want to plug that's coming up on the rise? Players is on Spike TV at 1am Every Friday Every Friday, 1am

Watch Matt's favorite show, Players Do you have anything to do with it? Ironically, I'm in it So he only loves things that he's in apparently, which is really a total ego move I have a bit of an ego I look good on screen.

All right, that's Matt Walsh talking about Besser. What do you got going on? I'm performing on my Twitter page every day, folks. It's all about Matt Besser. Can you show me what you got going on? Is that like road work? What? Yeah, where are you going? Where've got going on? I'm on Grodeward. What? Yeah, where you going? Where you gonna be? Oh, West Palm Improv this weekend and Nagadoshus Texas next weekend.

Yeah! TV for nerds! Get out there! We the people! Nagadoshus? Yeah, I think that's what it's called. Okay. And Seth Morris? I guess first I want to sit on and Seth Morris first time on the show this is going to be long I'm mostly joking

I'm also thinking that you know people in your mid-twenties aren't critical enough of liberal arts you know kind of PC thing I think you guys have a lot of guilt about your sexuality and that basic thing,

I mean, think whatever you want, I don't think I'm quite as bad as you guys think I am. Anyway, I'm going to plug a show that I'm doing at UCB in LA. I've been doing this character on CDR Radio called Bob Newman. I'll be honest. Yeah, Bob Newman.

Let's talk about those weirdos. Look, they're total weirdos. I mean, I know a lot about them. The whole thing is about divorced, sad dads. And the fact that they know about it. Don't they? Oh, Dylan, it's part of life, bro. Shit's getting real.

This is a dugout. So we're doing that. We're doing a talk show on later. You're doing it as a talk show on UCBLA. When? What's the date? Pardon me, I'll make a deal, you fucking lemmings. What's the date, we got 13 seconds. 12, 12, it's the 12th.

12th of what? August. Okay, so hopefully this will put this out before then. But thank you Doug for having me, and I'm, you know, I'm okay, I'm a good guy. Thanks. In summation, Seth Morris is a good guy and Inception is more boring than you think it is. No, Inception is a good guy.

No, don't put it that way. I'm having a heart and realizing that you made mistakes along the way. And I'm just gonna say Inception is a shithead. Do you have the end theme music? Deception is a shithead. Do you have the end theme music?