Doug Loves Movies - Live in The Pacific Northwest

Episode Date: August 22, 2010

Recorded in front of 121 awesome peeps at Parlor Live in Bellevue, WA on August 15, 2010. Rob Huebel, Graham Elwood, and Jay Hollingsworth guest.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, squeaky babies, sticky seeds With 50 azithoc or kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Cause Doug loves movies Hey everybody I decided at the last minute to switch stools and it's going to be really funny whoever gets the one I was just on because it's under it's in a wind tunnel.

It was too breezy for me. I was like, this is too cold. I'm going to move instead of shivering through the whole show. We'll have the biggest guest sit there. What? They don't get as cold, right? I don't know how it works hey everybody my name is Doug and I love movies welcome to a special edition of Doug loves loves movies, everybody.

We are out on the high road coming to you from the Parlor Live in Bellevue, Washington in front of a live Pacific Northwest audience. Great news, PNWers. I know it's awkward at first, but just see if you get used to it, calling yourselves PNWers. See, somebody's already into it. My podcasting pals, just a quick plug for Never Not Funny, WTF with Mark Maron, and The Nerdist are all going to be doing live podcasts from Bumbershoot this year in

Seattle, so try to get out there and support all your favorite podcasts. Those are some of my favorites, and I'll be on all of those again soon, or I just was. I don't know. I don't remember. Let's see. Now, this is normally where I do, this is a part of the show where I do like a movie story or joke of some kind. And I've got two of them I'd like to try tonight. The first one is I don't know exactly what happened at the end of Inception, but I'm pretty sure Tony Soprano

got whacked. And then the other one already hotly contested on Twitter. I wrote it on Twitter today and people already wrote, I already said that an hour ago. And I'm like, yeah, but I thought of it and I said it and I do it professionally. And you do it for 16 followers.

And they screwed it up and I'll explain how they screwed it up in a second. But here's my other joke I wanted to say. Sylvester Stallone should put out a line of adult diapers for action stars and call them dependables. And the people that argued with me, they put dependsables. And that's not as good, right? So I win. Yippee! All right.

Let's bring out our guests. I wrote down fancy introductions for all of them, and I will bring them out here one at a time. Next page. I even wrote that at the bottom. First of all, he's the house emcee here at Parler Live in Bellevue, and he's always a pleasure to work with every time I come through town. He's Big Irish Jay on Twitter.

Please give a warm welcome to Jay Hollingsworth, everybody. Jay, Big Jay is here. Yeah, sit right there. Sit in the cold spot, Big Jay. Isn't it freezing right there? Perfect. Okay, talk into the microphone. Perfect. Yeah, there you go. I know we have a great audience here, but there's a lot of people that will be listening to this, and if they'd have missed that perfect,

I don't know how they'd get through the rest of their day. Now, he's my co-star on G4's The High Road, and he's the co-host of the Comedy Film Nerds podcast. He's Graham Elwood, everybody! Hey! Let's do it, Parler Live! Let's make this the best podcast taping ever! is the best podcast taping ever.

Now, I should note to the listener that he just threw a bunch of cash into the crowd. That's how he got everybody to go so apeshit. Best $1,500 I ever spent, man. All right, now, so part of the fun of doing this show out of town, outside of California, it's one of two or three I've done this way now, is trying to convince some friend of mine to come and hang out with us and do the show and just come up just for that sole purpose. And I got somebody that I'm happy that I got, and I'll read the intro

for him now. He's back to DLM, that's what I call it sometimes, to try to capture the Len Moulton victory that evaded him in his appearance on the show with Anthony Jeselnik. Please give it up everybody for Rob Hubel is here.

People really do win at Doug Loves Movies. Rob Hubel just gave his own personal bottle of something to Jeremy. It's cocoa butter. Okay. Who doesn't like cocoa butter? And Jeremy is lathering up his arms.

I really like that. Lube it up, buddy. Lube that shit. Jeremy is something of a miracle because he's sitting he and his girl are sitting in the exact same seats they occupied at one of the shows this weekend I forget which one Friday okay there was two that night do you know 10 o'clock I thought you might be as clueless as me about it but yeah they're in the exact same seat so I don't know how that happened, but

probably is not a good sign. It's probably going to be an earthquake tonight. Am I sitting under a wind tunnel? Oh, you got a wind tunnel seat too? Graham, how's your seat? That's fucking great, man. It's awesome. It's warm.

It's temperate. Yeah. So there's a couple spots on the stage Where they hit you hard with the cold air I'm just joking I'm all good That's a sweet logo you have Yeah that's neat, they're projecting the logo Onto the back wall here at the Parlor Live

This is a very nice club This is Rob's first time in the building of course Yeah Anything else you want to say about it? Let's start the motherfucking podcast. Unsolicited praise for Parlor Live. I want to win. I want to beat you and you and you.

I want to win. I want to kill people. Yeah, so you're really competitive when you play. I think that's why the audience was excited that you're the one that I got to come up here. I'm here to murder people with movie trivia. These people are up for it. It's like Jim Guyana Jones people,

and they're just like, woo, we want to die. That's an old cult reference, you guys. Jim Jones Kool-Aid. Jim Jones Kool-Aid. So Rob... You may know him as the guy who uses too much tanner in I Love You Man, the motion picture. Yes.

And then there was that other thing you were in. But what else have you got coming up? I just did the other guy. What's in the can? He has a quick scene in the other guys. Did you guys see him in that? Why haven't you? I know there's some human giant fans here tonight. I'm going to have sex with your wife, buddy.

We're going to need that cocoa butter back. Yeah. We're going to need that cocoa butter back. Yeah. It doesn't even have a brand. Jeremy's Lotion. Clearly I remember Coming up my arms My elbows were so dry The guy that I gave the cocoa

butter to is also wearing a t-shirt that says the magic is in the hole. And stand up, dude. I know that listener, but he's huge. He's 800 feet tall. Look at him. You're gonna go through five of those cocoa butter things just to lube up your big body.

I just got a boner. What movies do you have in the can, Rob? What's coming up? You did a thing about kind of a serious movie about people die in a car accident or something. And then you come in and you're like,

what's up? Let's get high! No, other guys. I did this Katherine Heigl movie. That's what I'm talking about. What's it called? Is it called the Katherine Heigl movie? It's actually supposed to be a good movie, but...

You mean it's good like traveling pants good? Yeah. Good like you'll never see it in a million years good? Wait, do a lot of people listen to this podcast? Not for dudes good. I don't know how many people. Do important people in Hollywood listen to this podcast? I don't think so.

Or can I just go crazy? Go crazy, dude. No, no. No, I think the movie is going to be really good I think it might be Hard for me socially I play a gay person in the movie And I love gay people but I'm not gay

And I think now after this movie Everyone's going to think that I am gay So it could be hard You're going to get a lot of cock I'm going to get so much cock Oh my god You're going to Oh what a bad decision this is.

Why am I doing this? I'm not gay. I love chicks. You're gonna find the magic in Jeremy's hole, is what I think. Jeremy sucked it. Don't sing that too much.

I don't want to have to pay for it. What's the movie called? Do you really not know? No, I do know. It's called Life As We Know It. But I also just did this George Clooney movie. Faggot. In Hawaii.

Wait, me or him? Who are you talking about? But literally, that's also like a serious movie, and so when I pop up, it's going to be really distracting. People are going to be like, why is that guy in this movie?

But he's like, he's an amazing actor, and we shot a few scenes, like my scenes are with him, and it's him crying. Oh, you couldn't stop laughing, right? I literally could. I was just like, this guy is going to get so laid.

This scene is going to get him so much pussy. No, it's funny, though. But they shot this one scene where he has to tell a big party, it's like a cocktail party, and he's telling these people that his... This is terrible. But his wife is dying and he's telling them this news. And so when he does this scene, he starts crying when he's doing it. And all these extras in the movie, all these women are just like, just weeping from here

and weeping from here. Just like, so moist. The face and vagina, I should say, for the listeners. Podcast people, yes. I pointed to my eyeballs and my vaginas. George Clooney, make vaginas cry. I'm not gay, but I've got a vagina.

Keep it in a drawer. Wouldn't it be great if a woman came up and said, my vagina weeps for you. Wouldn't that be great? That would be great. You should make a t-shirt

with that, Jeremy. Yes. So Big Jay, have you been to the movies lately? Have you gotten out to the motion pictures? I recently saw The Other Guys,

and what really made it for me... Thank you, Jay. What really made it for me was there was this one actor, and it was amazing. I really think it turned the movie. He was kind of a detective. He kind of examined a car. Talking about me, buddy.

That's right! Boom! What have you ever done? Not jack shit. Other than that, I didn't really care about the movie. No, it was good. What have you ever done? You been in any movies, Jeremy? Yeah.

Your magic hole, has that ever been in a movie? Yeah. I hope not. His wife or girlfriend just said, I hope not. He looks like he could be... You should have been in the Expendables. Did you see Expendables this weekend?

Dude, go and beat off to that movie. Did anyone see that movie here? I saw it. Seriously? No one saw that movie this weekend? It's kind of movie lovers that are in the audience. Why didn't you guys see that? These are the only people that saw Scott Pilgrim instead of Julia Roberts or The Expendables.

Scott Pilgrim! Scott Pilgrim is so awesome, man. It is so fucking great. Is it good? I haven't seen it. It's so great. It's like Kick-Ass. Doug and I were talking about it. But not as violent. I mean, it's different. It's like Kick-Ass in the sense that

I think I'm... The box office has kind of showed it that I'm afraid and Doug and I were talking about this that the trailer might scare some people away like the trailer for Kick-Ass made it look like, spy kids, this is going to be cute. And it's like, no, there's a 10-year-old girl that kills people and calls them cunts. And it's fucking rad. It's a family movie.

And Scott Pilgrim is really, it looks like, oh, it's going to be kind of, they're going to try too hard in the trailer a little bit. The movie's great, though. And it's really, I've talked to some friends that read the comic. They say it's dead on. So it's So see it. Yeah, but we're recording this podcast on the Sunday night, the weekend that Scott Pilgrim opened, and it's made like $10 million in fifth place or something like that.

It's an extremely disappointing opening. So if you loved it, try to get other people to go see it in the next week or two. It could be one of those things that catches on after the first weekend. A bad first weekend really kills it, though. If you like to beat off two machine guns, then go see The Expendables.

That's what I said. I said to Brian Posehn, I like Scott Pilgrim better because it has girls in it. And Brian goes, what about Charisma Carpenter? Because she's Jason Statham's girlfriend for two scenes, and one of them she's got a big old bruise on her face. Spoiler alert.

Yeah. I don't want to spoil anything either, but there's a scene in The Expendables where, and this is a bummer actually, they waterboard this woman. Yeah, a woman. They show it, and you're like, okay, well now I actually, they waterboard this woman and they show it. They show it. And you're like, okay, well now I know how to waterboard a woman.

I'm gonna go do that. It totally gives you the idea that it's something you can do. Because it's not that complicated. You just wrap a thing around her face and then hold her down and pour water at her face. It's pretty easy. It's pretty fun.

It's not fun. It's not fun. Don't do that. Dick Cheney's going to jerk off so hard to that scene. But I liked when there was a guy on fire. A man was on fire and he was running around screaming about being on fire and one of the good guys was like annoyed by it and punched him in the face it's amazing you've been extinguished has anyone here seen the best movie ever made called step up 3d

so good isn't it amazing yeah I'm not even joking i mean the talking is for idiots but it's unbelievable literally i was like oh i have not seen this before where like i didn't know that teenagers bodies could float through space in such a sweaty way. It's so good. You guys got to see it. But literally when they talk, it's like, oh, never mind. Okay, this is for... Yeah, it's the worst.

But there's amazing 3D stuff like the scene where the couple is standing on the air grate and they realize that if they take their Slurpee straws out of their Slurpees and blow the little bit that's in there, the grating will shoot it up into the air and then it comes into

our faces. I was surprised that they didn't hire an usher to run by with a spray bottle and shoot everybody in the face during that scene. With some sticky shit. I completely did the worst thing in the middle of that movie for real.

I went to see it with a bunch of friends of mine, and I forgot that it's not even PG. It might be rated G. There's no swearing or anything. And I went to see it the other night at 7 o'clock at night in L.A., and there's a part where the bad guy comes on screen, and I stood up and I go, Fuck you! Fuck you!

Because everyone was kind of yelling and you know being funny and then I looked and right next to me were two little kids like little little kids and so after the movie I actually did this I waited until their parents

came out and I go I just want to tell you I'm so sorry I was the grown man that was sitting next to your kids screaming fuck you at the screen. And the dad was so nice. He goes, I accept your apology. That was it. But yeah, it's really good, man.

You should see that movie. It's so good. It's pretty fun. I like when the 16-year-old hip-hop dancer gets excited when an ice cream truck is playing some old Frank Sinatra standard. He goes, oh, that's my favorite. And then they bust out a whole routine to it

right there on the street. It's pretty fucking sweet. Isn't there like a water main breaks and then they do a dance fight? Yeah, they do a whole dance off in the water. You gotta have a dance off in the water. Yeah, it's a flash dance off. Yeah.

I love the idea, the concept that people can resolve their differences through break dancing. It's like, fuck you, man! Normally you would shoot someone in the throat. It's like, fuck you, man! Like, normally you would shoot someone in the throat, but it's like When I saw you spin around on your head 16 times, I decided

maybe I was wrong. That's how we settle problems in the barrio. I'll fucking kick your ass. Yes! 3D front row. Yeah. Try to do more physical comedy, Graham. What are some other things we could do?

People are paying two bucks to hear this, and you're dancing, and getting a guy in the front row all wet. Well, Ben in the front row... Is the show that great, sir? And Ben in the front row, then he just took Ben in the front row... Is the show that great, sir? And Ben in the front row, then, he just took a napkin and cleaned some of the water up. For the listener, I poured water on the stage,

and then I did an amazing dance number on it. Too bad you weren't here to see it live. And I won the dance off, and we resolved our differences, and then Ben in the front row cleaned it up after me. Yay, Ben! I think I know the answer already, Graham, but what is the movie that's out right now that you

want to tell your whole Palm Strike army to go and see? Like I said, Scott Pilgrim vs. The World, man. Yeah, fucking see it. Tell all your friends. Tweet about it. Because Kick-Ass is actually, you know, it didn't do that well at the box office. The DVD is doing very well because of the word of mouth.

Honestly, vote with your dollars, man. I say that on my podcast all the time. If you're tired of shitty Michael Bay fucking movies, then put... Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Not cool, bro. Yeah. Rob is playing a doctor in one scene in the next Transformers.

Well, all right. He walks in and snaps the glove and hands the patient some cocoa butter. That's all I want to do in any movie. I would love to do that in like 10 movies. Just hand someone cocoa butter. And then explode. Like my head gets blown off. And then

dance off. Yeah. Straight to the dancing. But yeah, Scott Pilgrim's really I saw like a, I snuck in today and saw like another the first hour of it again. Because Graham and I saw it on Friday. It was just us and a few other people and our, you know, so we were sitting there kind of casual

with our pants around our ankles. What? With cocoa butter. Yeah. We went for the same joke, but I decided not to hammer the cocoa butter thing again. Have you just started working with me? That's all I fucking do, bitch,

is hammer jokes into the ground, and then I give them CPR, and then fucking beat them in the ass again. And then I palm strike them. Thanks, Jay, for telling me to call back my own joke. That's pretty awesome, though. That'd be a pretty good threat

to somebody. I will beat you until you're dead and then I'll give you CPR so I can beat you some more. Because beating the dead is cruel. That's like a the thing I love about the last Rambo and the current

Expendables is just how insane the violence is. There's so much. Like Terry Crews in Extendables at one point is like, this gun has bullets that explode inside you and then he whips it out at one point and everybody just gets eviscerated in the most

violent fashion. And then I'm sitting in the audience going, why don't they just use that gun all the time? Like, why do they go, oh no, now we need this gun. This is a different kind of group of guys coming at us, trying to kill us. We have to take it up a notch. There's a line in there.

I don't want to ruin it for anyone but you'll you'll appreciate it but um you know how you see bruce willis for like two seconds and um he's in a church right and then so schwarzenegger walks in and schwarzenegger all he does is like say hello to mickey rourke or somebody like that literally he just goes like hey what's up bro and the other guy mickey r, hey, what's up, bro? And the other guy, Mickey Rourke, goes, what's up, man? And Bruce Willis, his only line in the movie is like, why don't you guys not suck each other's dicks?

He literally said, it's like, first of all, you're in a church. Yeah. And second of all, it's Schwarzenegger talking to Sylvester Stallone, the lead character. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's hard to tell. I can't remember because he looks like such a fucking crazy person. Yeah, but then Bruce Willis says about the director of the movie and the governor of California, what are you guys going to stop sucking each other's dicks? But if you're going to have one line. He has more than one line, too. It's a whole scene of them. But it's funny because after they talk for a little bit,

Arnold Schwarzenegger just goes, this isn't for me, and then he leaves. There was no reason for him to be there. And his character is just like, no, I don't want that offer, and he leaves. And then they never mention him again. But I was thinking about when I mentioned the Terry Crews gun, it's like in the Mission Impossible movies

when there's a scene where Tom Cruise will pull off the face of somebody he was an imposter of. When you can do that, why would you ever look like yourself if you're a spy if you could make a whole fake face? Or like Charlie's Angels when LL Cool J pulls his face off and it's Drew Barrymore, and then later in the movie she's disguised as a man,

but she just has a little mustache pasted on. Wait, you could look exactly like LL Cool J in the first part in the movie she's disguised as a man, but she just has a little mustache pasted on. Wait, you could look exactly like LL Cool J in the first part of the movie, but now you've just put on a mustache and being a girl obviously dressed as a man. Next topic. Yeah, let's play some games. What do you say?

Let's do it! Let's do it! Let's do it! You will bow down before me! You and your ass! What movie? Bam. Terrence Stamp. Superman was the answer.

If that wasn't on mic. And thanks for bringing your own trivia, Graham. I just like to get them warmed up. Can I plug Jackass 3D? Yeah, you can. It's a movie. I saw a screening of that two weeks ago, and it's fucking amazing.

It looks hilarious. It's so, it really is amazing. Like, there's a couple parts where, like, there's, like. I mean, let's keep in mind, let's put it this way. If you liked 1 and 2 or the series. Oh, yeah, yeah. If you're offended by shit in 3D, then. And I don't mean stuff.

I mean shit in 3D, then don't see it. They throw shit at the camera? They don't throw it at the camera. It just happens. Can't control where it's going to go. Just comes out and comes in your face in three dimensions.

But that aside, all of the other stuff is so funny. It's really, really funny. Yeah, the trailer's hilarious. Yeah. But I like when they fall down. I don't like when they eat until they vomit

or shit in each other's faces. I like that you simplify it to like, yeah, they just fall down. Put that in the movie. Ultimately, that's what it is. In the trailer, when what's-his-name Knoxville

is in the Santa Claus suit on the top of a really tall tree and then they just saw it down. God damn it. I know. That is such a funny visual. And he's like, I'm crying on the sand.

I drank too much last night. Mwah, bam. It's good business. Yeah, they're doing that. That's like, makes it so much worse that they're doing all that stuff hungover most of the time. Like, that cannot help the process at all.

I'm going to smash you in the head really hard. Oh, well, it's a good thing I'm hungover. It's going to work out great. All right, so anything else you want to promote, Rob? Just life. Just enjoy your lives. You're so full of movie stories, I feel like I'd be remiss without asking you about... He was telling us before the show

that you recently went to a 30th anniversary screening of Empire Strikes Back. Ooh, that was really fun. Well, yeah, we went to this... Who was sitting near you? Well, we were sitting in front of Han Solo and Chewbacca. I forgot those guys' real names. Peter Mayhew and Markwbacca. I forgot those guys' real names. Peter Mayhew and Mark

Hamill. Yeah. Yeah, I went to the screening of Empire Sykes Back. Wait, was Peter Mayhew Darth Vader? No, Peter Mayhew is Chewbacca. Yeah, okay, okay. Whoever the guy is... David Prowse was Darth Vader. Yeah, okay, okay. Whoever the guy is, he goesse was Darth Vader Whoever the guy is

I thought you laughed because I got it wrong What? Yeah, that guy, that noise Do it again Originally Chewbacca was just going to fart out of his mouth. Yes, that's a true fact. Yeah, it didn't work, so they went in and looped in a new noise. But yeah, we...

You know, Big J hasn't taken a shot at it yet. Do your Chewbacca impression. I have nothing. It's horrible. I knew it! I knew the big fat guy could do it I'm out of here Oh hey

I take that back I want to plug I didn't think you could do it Oh wait are we done with you I'm done yeah I want to plug a classic The finest martial arts cinematography ever Because I'm trying to bring it back The last dragon I want to plug a classic, the finest martial arts cinematography ever,

because I'm trying to bring it back, The Last Dragon. Oh! Yes, yes. That's great. Who is the baddest mofo low down in this town? Joe! Wow.

That's impressive. Are we just going around and saying things that we like? I don't know. Yeah, you started it. Like, I love chicken. You're not in jackass 3D. Chicken, bitches! Yeah, bro! I love fucking coconut water!

Who the fuck wants a taste of that shit? I'd like to plug Jeremy because his hole is magic. Oh, God. I get it. Plug Jeremy's his hole is magic. Oh, God. I get it. Plug Jeremy's hole. Let's talk about movies. No, you started, Rob, with the I want to talk about a movie I'm not in that I think you should see.

No, but that was a movie that I... You saw early and you want to get the word out. Yeah, well, he wants to get the word out about Last Dragon super late. But you can't go back in time. Why can't you? There's fucking rules now. And why do you keep eating ice cubes like you're pregnant?

Yeah, I know. Exactly. Is that a thing? Do pregnant people do that? Jeremy, is that what pregnant people do? Resident expert on weird things? Pickle martinis on its way. Jesus Christ. All right, yeah, Last Dragon, I want to plug.

Yeah, yeah, go see Last Dragon, because Big Jay loves it. It's the greatest martial arts movie ever. Bruce Leroy. The greatest one ever? No. For what it is. What about that one with the thing? That one is good What is the greatest martial arts movie, Graham?

I go Enter the Dragon That's kind of a staple Enter the Dragon is amazing But there's so many obscure ones Honestly, Hero That movie that came out about 4 or 5 Blew me away It was so visually amazing

I never want to see it on DVD because I only want to remember how amazing it was on a big screen. That's what I thought of Hero. I don't like Asian people. Well, then the perfect weapon, Jeff Speakman. What? The perfect weapon, Jeff Speakman. Non-Asian.

That's where you go for non-Asian martial arts is Jeff Speakman. And obscure. Or Uma Thurman. She's a good martial artist. Did we already play the game? Yeah. You won. Congrats.

You totally won, dude. We're almost out of time. Which means you're eliminated. It's a crazy system I have. You get a bowl of ice cubes! Let's play build a title and the way we do that is we get hopefully a very simple and easy to build on title from the audience. It's been a disaster sometimes when I ask people to name a title.

Let's go with Ron the Fiance. That's what his gigantic name tag says. One of the bigger name tags, I'd say. Probably, maybe the biggest. Looks like a sheet of paper. Safety pin, bam. Pow. Let's go, honey.

Yeah, just name a movie. You don't have to rub your chin. I didn't ask for a theorem. You want some cocoa butter for that chin? Hammer. We can go to somebody else. Were you in a car accident today? Wow. Just put a sentence together. I'm sure there's a movie. Just say a word and there's probably a movie called that.

Awesome. Father of the Bride. Alright, so the title is Father of the Bride. We start on the opposite end there with Rob. Would you like to name a movie that ends in father or one that begins with bride? Can I do Father of the Bride of Frankenstein?

Yeah, you can. Did I win? People were sort of impressed. Is it over? So we got Father of the Bride of Frankenstein. Graham, what can you add to that? So either a movie that ends in father or begins with Frankenstein, correct?

Sure. Yes. Yeah,stein. Correct? Sure. Yes. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Um, um,

uh, I was in a car accident today, so get the fuck off my back. No. Uh, Frankenstein vs. The Mummy Wait a second Alright, Bride of Frankenstein Wait, what?

Father of the Bride of Frankenstein vs. The Mummy So you could just add part two if you're super lazy Can I do the shorter version of Father? Baby's Daddy. I don't know what you're saying. I don't either. Yeah, we'll do

Father of the Bride of Frankenstein vs. the Mummy Part 2. Or just 2? Was it 2 or Part 2? Does anybody know specifically? Oh, Mummy Returns. Good call. Okay, so that's Mummy Returns. Oh, Mummy Returns. Good call. Okay, so that's Mummy Returns. So,

nothing begins with the word returns. So, I'm going to go with I'm going to go in the name of the father of the Bride of Frankenstein versus the Mummy Returns.

So you need something that ends in in, Rob. Because I don't think anything begins in returns. Turns. Were you whispering to me? Turns. Earns of a dead person. Wait, what are our ending options right now? Returns is on one end.

So fuck that end. And on the front end is in, in the name of the father of the bride of Frankenstein versus the mummy returns. Can I just quit? Yes. You're out. I quit. Rob Hubel

is out, everybody. Means he can't play any more games for the rest of the show. No games? I'm just kidding. You're done. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. Take back your cocoa butter and go home.

No, Graham Elwood, can you do anything with that? I've got something. Let's see. It's a cheat because it's from another time when the first word was in. But I can do it. Ten seconds. Three seconds. Two seconds.

It's like a movie. What? Devil in. There's something called devil in? It's not a movie. Yeah. Can't just say words. It's like a porno.

All right, Graham's out. Big J, what do you got? Fucking nothing. I was trying to think. You got nothing nothing You got nothing I got Rone in The name of the father of the bride Of Frankenstein

Versus the mummy Returns Don't applaud that But you know it's like people that are really good at Scrabble And they know every stupid two letter word You know like there's just ways to cheat And I just did it and ended the game, mercifully. Because the three of you are all just pissing your pants

trying to think of anything. What's that? Suspect zero-nin. Yeah, but I won, so we don't have to keep going. Well, then I could have said Ronin. I could have said the Kurosawa movie, Ronin. But shut it. That's a good one.

That is good. Inception in the name of the father. Yeah, that's good. Yeah. See, I like sound-alikes. People write to me on Twitter, they try to do ones that fit, but they don't sound right. The letters are right. So that's the way to play the game. And congratulations to all of you for losing.

Damn it. I just thought of one. Fuck. I play it all the time, so I can't be beat. No, I can totally be beat. All right, but let's pick some contestants for you guys to play for in the Leonard Maltin game. I will let each of you pick who you're going to play for in the Leonard Maltin game I will let each of you pick who you're gonna play for so let's start with big J whose name tag strikes your fancy Brian

Brian where's Brian over there I'm sorry Wow he does have a big tag okay Graham who would you like to play I got I? I'm torn between the dude with the Batman shirt and the girl who's really excited about Human Giant. Batman shirt. All right. Yeah, you wear a Batman shirt all the time. Why don't you have some fucking... Batman shirt.

I got to go Cody, Batman shirt. Sorry, Aaron, no offense. I have a Batman cookie jar and a Batman watch and Batman cocoa butter. I totally can't read that guy's name tag, though. What is it? Cody? Cody. All right. And Rob, who do you want to play for?

I got to play for the slutty human giant fan. No, you can't also play for Cody. I know she's not slutty. That's my wife. I think Cody looks kind of like a whore. So I think we're going to get this. This is going to be good business.

All right. Let me get my phone out. I should have done that while you guys were talking. I'm pulling up the Leonard Maltin app. I pre-checked it before the show. It actually works in here. Is it possible that I'm pregnant up the Leonard Maltin app. I've pre-checked it before the show. It actually works in here. Is it possible that I'm pregnant? Yeah.

These are delicious. You could get like a glass of water, you know what I mean? But I know that's too much for the baby. I've got to take care of my baby. Let's start with Big Jay. It's his first time playing the game. Then we'll go down to Rob, Graham, and around that way until

there's a winner. I would like you to pick between these categories. My friend, would you like a music biopic, a western, or audience favorite in theaters now?

Oh, fuck. In theaters now. in theaters now? Oh, fuck. In theaters now. In theaters now. All right. These are movies that are in theaters now, so Leonard did not give them a rating,

and you can't pick a year because, well, let me let you pick a year. Would you like 2010, 2010, or 2010? I'm going to go with 2010. Okay, here we go. 2010.

This is a movie from this year. Leonard writes longer reviews for the new movies on his app, so I'll try to pick out some things that don't give away too much. It's kind of hard. The most novel aspect of the movie is that it takes place in blank. Helpful. For some reason, where it takes place

is a very novel aspect of the movie. And then another clue is all in all, it's pretty good. Fuck. Oh, I know it. And like I said, I can't tell you how many stars, but it's in theaters now, and know it. And like I said, I can't tell you how many stars,

but it's in theaters now, and you have ten names. How many names you can get it in? J? Ten. H. Bids ten names. Rob Hubel?

Four. Four names. Always a bold bidder, Rob Hubel, you guys. Four? That's the way I live my life. That's the way I live my life Me and Aaron I say name that movie, bitch

Well, there's no reason to Bring his middle name into it There's no reason to tell everybody what his middle name is I'm pregnant I'm sorry, that's what I would mean It's a term of thing with a thing Alright, would you like the clues again, Rob? What?

Would you like the clues again, Rob? What? Would you like the clues again? The clues? It's in theaters now and I get four names of the people in movies and it's unusual because it's in blank, which is 3D, right?

No, it's a location. Really? Yeah. Oh, shit. You're fucked. it's in a location here's your four names it's somewhere this movie takes place somewhere

that's an interesting aspect of it is that it has a location okay can I stand up for this and all in all it's pretty good James A. Stevens was in this movie? Who the fuck is that? Jake Cherry?

Who? Say the name, what you just said Jake Cherry Jake Cherry Is this a porn movie? Jake Cherry Jeremy's magic hole Alice Krieg Oh, kriegster yeah yeah

and monica bellucci wait who's that that sounds familiar monica bellucci no help from the audience was in matrix no yelling out the answer all right not the good on. Not the good Matrix movie. Whoops. It's really in theaters now. Like, I could go outside. Yeah, yeah, if you thought about, like, what's in theaters now, this would be one of them. Do you guys know what it is? Not necessarily a lot of theaters. Does anyone here? Don't yell out the answer.

We got one person. Am I allowed to phone a friend? No. You're allowed to guess in 10 seconds. 14 seconds. Count it down. You count to guess in 10 seconds. 14 seconds. Count it down. You count it down. 80 seconds.

Three seconds. Count that shit down. Two, one. Step up 3D. Nothing? You got nothing? It's step up 3D, man. All right.

So Graham wins the point. What? How is it not step up 3D? Cody. What was it? Well, I'll read the rest of the names, and then people can yell it out as soon as they know it. Omar Benson Miller, Toby Kebbell,

Teresa Palmer, Alfred Molina, Jay Baruchel. Oh. Nicholas Cades. Sorcerer's Apprentice. Sorcerer's Apprentice. Alfred Molina. Yeah.

It is really stretching it to say in theaters now. I think it's on the way out. That's not a movie. The Sorcerer's Apprentice? Oh, Jesus. No one... It's a movie based on a scene from a cartoon. So it's legit.

It's too legit. It's not a movie. All right. I'm going to erase it from the phone so I never ask about it again. Wait, can I get points if I get the one-inch death punch? Jay does this. Big Jay can do a one-inch punch, which is like a really hard punch that only comes

at you from just one inch away. And I've been trying to talk Rob into doing it, getting punched in front of the audience. Jackass style. So if you're willing to take a one inch punch We'll give you one point for it Oh shit I have been drinking Do it for that slut who likes human giant

This specifically does not translate to a podcast Can I just go Yeah well no Because the audience here isn't going to cheer you faking it Specifically does not translate to a podcast. Can I just go, Yeah, well, no, because the audience here isn't going to cheer you faking it. They're going to cheer when it really happens. Okay. You can wait if you want. You don't have to do it now.

I'll wait, but I want to do it. Oh. Because I'm going to need that point. All right. Well, whenever strategically when you think you need that point, jump in. I'm only going need that point. All right. Strategically, when you think you need that point, jump in. I'm only going to do it if you can do it in my face. No problem.

No, no, no. This is very sensitive. That's a bad idea. Don't do it in the face. From an inch away? No, no, don't. It's a fucking inch. Just call me a pussy.

Do you know how much speed it can gain in that one inch? A lot. You're going to need a lot of ice cubes. Yeah. But keep in mind, it's the first person to two points, and Graham has got one on the board. You may need to use that point now. All right. so you may need to use that point now.

All right. So Graham challenged Rob, and Grab got the point, so we start with Big J. You get to pick the category. Should we do In Theaters Now? Again, didn't work out for you so good. Sly Stallone movies, because The Expendables is playing in theaters now,

and it's crazy. Or movies that are set in Seattle. Stallone movies, because The Expendables is playing in theaters now and it's crazy. Or movies that are set in Seattle. Special category for a special place. I would normally say the Stallone ones, but because... I'll pick the Seattle one. I'll go with Seattle.

That's so sweet of you. Why don't you play to win instead of sucking up to these... Stallone. Stallone. Yeah. Boo! Brian. Boo! I'm playing for Brian. Fuck everyone else.

It's me and you, Brian. That's right. We'll one-inch punch everyone. Stallone! All right, do you want a Stallone movie from 1984, 1998, or 2006? 2006. Here we go. How many were there?

Leonard gives it two and a half stars. I might give a little more. Len might be a little hard on it. Would you give it five? No, because it's a one to four system. Leonard Maltin doesn't go off of his own charts. All right, so let's see here It's hard to pick a clue out Contrived

Isn't that every Stallone movie that's ever been made? Contrived to be sure But also curiously endearing. Alright, you got that? And it's from 2006. Two and a half stars, and you have nine names. Don't say it. Don't yell it out.

I will say... How many names do you think you can get in, Big J? Three names. Rob? Zero names. Zero names. Now, Graham Rob? Zero names. Zero names. Now, Graham Elwood? Negative one! Negative one!

God damn it! Negative names. Here we go. The crowd is going berserk. Wait. Sit down, Graham. This isn't over yet. Fuck, I can't remember the other guy's name. I want to do negative two so bad, but I can't remember the other guy's name.

I want to do negative two so bad, but I can't remember the other fucker's name. So you have to name in order from top down the... What did you say, one name? Negative one, yes, sir. So he only has to name the absolute lead of the movie. But if Jay wants to try to challenge that,

you're going to have to try to come up with two names God I can't remember the fucking name Alright name it fuck I know Well you know he's going to get it I know I can't think of the other name What a horrible conundrum Can we use one inch death punches as more than

negative names? Like, can I say one negative name and a one inch death punch? Death punch. What the fuck? I'm asking. I'm asking.

I just want to see you get one inch punch so bad that I'm asking. What the fuck? I'm asking. I'm asking. I just want to see you get one-inch punch so bad that I'm kind of willing to say yes, even though that doesn't make any sense. Is that? And is this rule going to carry over for future? The crowd wants a one-inch punch. I don't. I really. Hey, Graham.

Graham. What's the movie and the actor? Just say it. That would be Rocky Balboa with I think it was Sylvester Stallone. Is that correct? That's correct. Now, Graham, will you be willing to go back to just one point if he takes the punch right now? Oh, fuck yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, here we go. Yes, yes, yes. You get Graham's point, and he's not officially the winner yet if you take a one-inch punch. Wait, is the one-inch punch going to give me diarrhea? Depends on where you do it. Don't do it in your butthole.

Fucking the TMZ. No, no. If you do it in your butthole, you don't get diarrhea. You get vomit. All right. I'm going to marinate. Come on.

Take it. Wait. Am I doing it right now? Alright Come on, take it Wait, am I Am I doing it right now? One inch punch One inch punch One inch punch One inch punch Hold on

This is vicious Have you guys seen this before? Is it I made him one inch punch The opening act the last time I was here. I usually tone it down, but I've been drinking. David Huntsberger took it like a man. Aaron, I'm doing this for you. Rocky Balboa!

Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. The Italian Stallion! Go get him, kid! I may be dead, but I'll talk to you in flashbacks, kid. This does not translate to the podcast at all. Don't hit my dick. You got a piss lightning. You got a crap thunder.

It's a one inch. Wait, should I hold my breath? Use your imaginations, listeners. Just relax. I'll do. You relax. I won't do it, but I'll let you feel like what it's going to be. Just make whatever noise.

There in the fucking sternum where they knock the wind out of people. Your baby's going to die. Yelling, yelling, yelling, yelling. I won't do 100%. Home abortion. Home abortion. Oh, sorry, sorry. Wait, wait, wait.

Oh! That was amazing. Oh, I'm sorry. Wait, wait, wait. Oh! That was amazing. Oh, I'm sorry. Were you ready? He totally caught him off guard. Oh, shit. See, now I'm not going to feel bad for charging $1.99 for people to listen to that. Man, that's like. That is good listening.

That's the warm-up. It's spreading throughout my body. It rolls. Like I can feel stuff rushing to my heart like in Kill Bill Part 2. Get him a body bag. Sweet the leg. All right, so what's the score? I feel sick.

You have one. I do feel sick. And Graham has one. It's one to one? Yeah. All right, so what's the score? I feel sick. You have one. I do feel sick. And Graham has one. It's one to one? Yeah. All right, fuck it. Yeah, I'm on board. I could take some more of that.

You can't. Here we go. I can't survive this. Little side note, you can't fly for 48 hours. What? You're staying. Is that true? No, fuck it.

No. No. I was in. Don't go in a plane. The decompression and the thing that happened. Is that true? Did I at least stand my ground? That was good. You didn't step back at all, did I?

A little bit. These people are like, you fucking pussy. Even your human giant fans are like, you pussy fucking fight back. Do something. Her husband's like, see that guy? He's a dick. Sorry, you can see it tomorrow on YouTube.

It's been recorded. Oh yeah, sweet. Alright, keep going. One to one. You get to pick the category. Me again? Yes, you. Why always him? What the fuck? Because it keeps stopping at Grant.

Because you guys each got points and he didn't. I know. All right, fuck. I know I let you down, Brian. I'm sorry. Come on, dude. Category is Jesus. Can I have some of that?

Well, Brian, who Big J is playing for, is really mad. He's like, come on, man. Fucking do something. I need some cocoa butter. Rub it on your tummy. All right, Big Jay. You get to pick the category. Oh, he's cocoa buttering. Cocoa butter.

You're putting cocoa butter on the wound? The non-existent wound? It smells so coconutty. That's like, when you lift up your shirt like that, it's literally like the after in the P90X infomercial. It's fucking amazing. I'm so lubed. Free handshakes from Rob after the show.

Okay, Big J, do you want to play set in Seattle, musical biopics, or westerns? The last one was restrooms? Yes, movies that take place in restrooms. What'd you say? What? Restrooms?

Westerns. Westerns. Oh, Westerns. We'll do Seattle. Set in Seattle. Alright, would you like us... Please don't yell out because you guys are going to know it. You're going to be like, that was on my blog.

They kept me up all night. 1987, 1989, or 1996? 87, 89, or 1996? 87, 89, or 96. Let's go... If this game was just repeating back the years that I say, you would win. Let's go 96. Okay, 96.

Okay, 96. That's what you said, 96. I figured out you always go for the most recent. This is a good smart play Two stars from Len Not fair Deserves two and a half at the very least He says that it's

Let's see He says it's passable Passable? Passable, hence the two stars I guess And then The executive producer is Brian Grazer That's a horrible clue But that's

Yeah the rest of it gives it away Oh awfully derivative There you go That's a good clue Passable, awfully derivative Brian Grazer is the producer Two stars, 1996 And there are

Five names I will say Two He thinks he can get it in two, Rob Hubel Name that movie Oh Shit I think you had a good shot at this Rob Hubel. Name that movie. Oh, shit. I think you had a good shot

at this. Hopefully if I can stay awake. I was trying to get a fucking hands from you. I was trying to get a fucking read. Alright. Sleepless in Seattle. Don't try to play mind games. You have no idea?

That kind of bidding and you have no idea? How dare you? How dare you spit on my stupid game? Now just listen to the two fucking names and try to play like you're thinking and trying to win. But seriously, thanks for helping us move all the tables earlier.

If I give him another one-inch punch, can I get a point? Yes. All right, done. Let's go. Wait. Let's see if he gets it, and then I'll punch him.

All right. The names are Alyssa Milano and Amy Brenneman. Yeah. It takes place in Seattle, two stars. The Seattle audience doesn't know. Passable, derivative, awfully derivative. Producer.

This is a fucking major. Oh, I already said two, so I'm... Ten things I hate about you. Oh. You're killing me. Do you know it? No. Well, then fuck off hate about you. Do you know it? Well then fuck off. Fuck you. Your partner doesn't know it.

I know. I told you. All right. Well, it is a hard one. I'll give you that. Do you guys know? Yeah, yeah. People in the audience know it.

But you give up, right? Yes. Okay. So the winner is Rob Hubel. He wins our game No way We gotta go one more point I got a chance to tie

I gave him that point in the fight You gotta take a one inch punch Wait wait wait Before we do it though Let's just finish out this Because people listening are going to be like What was the fucking movie? It also starred William L. Peterson,

Reese Witherspoon, and Mark Wahlberg, and it's called Fear. It's kind of a good schlocky movie. I enjoyed it. I liked it. All right, so now Graham's going to get a one-inch punch. Then does he get a point? Yeah, you guys will be tied at two apiece.

Man, All right. And we'll have to have a tiebreaker. This isn't really the Leonard Maltin game. This is more just like fucking fighting. This is the LMMA. Jay, hit him. Jay, hit him. LMMA.

Hit him when he's not expecting it. The Leonard Maltin martial arts. Holy shit. That one, it happens out of nowhere. I was talking during it. Graham, could you make the noise again? Yeah, I went out. Oh, there you go. I went, ow, you

cocksucker. That's what I said. How bad is it? Is it alright? I'm gonna shit blood for a week, but it's definitely not good for a baby. No. Definitely not. I don't think my baby made it. My baby's like, hey man, I was watching TV.

Alright, so... I have a TV. So sorry. TV and cold water. It was really neat. Big Jay, you got a lot of catching up to do. You have zero and they both have two. Fuck.

They both have a bruise. And you can't punch yourself, Jay. You know what? I would let you if you wanted to get a point for it. Okay. So we're going to start with you again, Jay. By the way, Cody, that was for you. Wait, he lost.

Jay lost a point, so it should go to me. No. No, you... As far as picking, it was... Yeah, what does Jay keep? Who picks? Yeah, because Jay keeps picking because he keeps losing or I keep losing. Okay, we don't need to keep going.

Right, well, the one-inch punch thing really threw a confusing wrinkle in it. All right, all right, all right. But okay, we'll start with you, you big baby. So Rob Hubel's baby is going to pick the next category. Cuckoo cuckoo. Westerns. This could end it. This could end it.

Would you like restrooms? No. Westerns. Westerns in theaters now or sliced alone Rob Hubel in theaters now why is that bad is it not cool to do that

it's alright they don't know they're all high it's in theaters now in theaters now and here's what Len has to say about it. He says, I felt myself drifting away. Yeah, Len gets really introspective on this one.

My life was a swirling... No, he didn't say that part. He felt himself drifting away, and then he said, I'm from the less is more school, which is a terrible school. The tuition's really high, and you're like, I thought less was more.

Okay, and how many names? And there are are 13 names. It's from this year, 2010. I can name it in five names. Go to Big J? Which way were we going? Yeah, I go.

Four names. Name it. Let's do this shit. Here you go, Graham. Here's your four names. Tell me the two things again that Lenny said. You don't care. No, I do. I'm drifting away.

Dude, I'm looking at who the four names are and you don't give a shit about the clues. Trust me on this. Lucas Haas, Michael Caine, Pete Possilthwaite, and Marion Cotillard. Oh, shit. Hang on. I can't believe he doesn't already know it.

You got this. Why is this confusing? Easy. Michael Caine. Oh. Yeah. Oh. Is the clock running?

I think the clock's running. Punch him. Punch him. Clock's running. What is punching? Punch him, punch him. Clock's running. What is punching? Punch him in the back. Three, two. That is a...

Don't get distracted. It's cool. It's cool. I love your shirt. Harry Brown. No. Boom! Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, he was the ninth billed actor in Harry Brown in which he played the title character. It's a little movie called Inception, you dumbass. In fucking Inception. Inception. I didn't...

That movie bored me. I'm sorry. So Jay gets a point. Great. Yeah, Jay's on the board. Great. Fuck. You want another one in? This is exciting. How much time do we have to wrap this show up? How much time do we have? Can we go to midnight?

All right, here we go. Order another round of drinks, everybody. Can we... I have a question. Can we kick Jay in the balls to take away that point? Wait, how many points do I get? You can one-inch punch his balls if you're willing to put a knuckle into his... sack town. Wait, how many points do I get? You can one-inch punch his balls.

If you're willing to put a knuckle into his sack town, then that's your business. I just wanted to get a shout-out to Sacramento. All right. Got a show coming up there on Halloween. All right, here we go. So now Jay is in the hunt. He's got a point. And since he got the point, and who challenged who? You challenged Graham to get it right? All right, so we start with Rob again. Here we go, Rob. Do you want to go Sly Stallone, set

in Seattle, or musical biopics? I love how people always have opinions on that. I think I know you, Rob. Really? Musical bio? This is the best category for you. Stallone. Stallone, here we go. Let's get serious. Would you like a Stallone movie from 84, 96, or 2... Oh, we did that one already.

84 or 96? 96? Question mark? I'm sorry, I meant 98. But you'll still take it, I'm sure. I quit. 98. He gives it three stars.

He calls it entertaining. But too sophisticated and violent for the kids. So this is a movie with Sylvester Stallone from 1998 that he calls entertaining, gives it three stars, and he says it's too sophisticated and violent for the kids. And there are 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12 performers involved in the cast list of this motion picture. I fell asleep while you were talking. Sorry.

How many names? I'm not good at Stallone movies. I can name it in twelve names. I'll go ten. Nine. Wow, this is exciting. This is like watching that van drop into the river.

Somebody should do a Chris Farley thing on YouTube, like, I was in a van falling into the river. All right. Rob? I can name it in five. Ooh. Bolt jump. People have some ideas

for what you should bid, Graham, but I think you should go from your heart. Four. Name it. Name it, he says. All right, 98, Stallone, three stars. Let's go, Cody. Let's lock it in. Paul Mazurski.

He's a director of some note. John Mahoney. Jennifer Lopez. And Danny Glover were in this movie. What the fuck? Was this like a TBS movie? They worked in this movie what the fuck was this like a TBS movie they worked on this movie they their artistry is featured in this movie along with Sylvester Stallone does Danny Glover go I'm too old for this shit But he's on the toilet at the time. Oh. Yeah, it's a joke from my act.

Okay. Do you have anything, Graham? You think if you just pretend to be asleep, we'll just move on? Yeah, that's what I was hoping. You were like, well, Graham's asleep. Here's the point. Let's go on.

I would venture to guess you have no idea and it won't come to you. Because this is a hard one. Fuck. Nothing, right? I have nothing. I'll read the rest of the names. Jane Curtin, Dan Aykroyd, Anne Bancroft, Christopher Walken, Gene Hackman, Sylvester Stallone,

Sharon Stone, Woody Allen, Antz. It's called Antz. Oh, yes! Jay has two points. We have a three-way tie. Yes! Jesus.

All right, this is it. Last point wins, right? Sudden death. This is it. No punches can get you out of this. No. What if we just go all punches? Just one of us is dead. Okay. Alright, so we got

set in Seattle. Oh wait, I gotta figure out who does it. Who got the point? You got the point for making him guess it, so we start with Rob again. What the fuck? I never get to pick shit. It's always the odd person out that gets to go. And Rob, do you want set in Seattle, musical

biopics, or westerns? Seattle. It's a local favorite. Parlor Live. Okay. Let's see. 1986 or 1991 movie 1991 wait which category do you pick Seattle oh I got the wrong one hang on a second I was looking at the movies going that's's not in Seattle. Did Buddy Holly live in Seattle? I think so.

All right, would you like 1987 or 1989? A couple of classics made in Seattle. Partially shot in Seattle. Supposedly set in Seattle. 89? 89, here we go. Three stars from Leonard. He's wrong.

This is a four star classic. He calls it satisfying, though, even though he only gives it three stars. I've never been satisfied and went, but not perfect. And then he also says

that Lois Childs has a cameo. Say that one again? the great Lois Childs. Lois Childs is in the movie? Of course. Fuck. She played Holly Goodhead in Moonraker and she has a cameo in this movie

that got three stars in 1989 and Rob Hubel to win the game you have 11 names Start the bidding Zero names You've got to be kidding me. Graham Elwood and Rob Hebel

are moving around, making me uncomfortable. I will go minus one. Minus one name, but I worry that that's good strategy,

because is Big J going to go two names? I will go to you to ask him the question. Give it to him. Name that movie? Name it. Okay, Graham. What's the name of the movie? Fabulous Baker Boys, Jet Bridges.

That is incorrect. What the fuck? No way. No way. That did take place in Seattle, but this movie also, What the fuck? No way! No way! That did take place in Seattle, but this movie also, oh, I didn't name any names, obviously. This movie features

John Cusack. It's called Say Anything. Yeah! God damn it! God damn it! I thought reading all the names would be boring. Like, why read all the names now? But you did it. Big J took it down, everybody.

They downed us, Brian. He punched his way to the top. I'm sorry. It was him. When did Fabulous Baker Boys come out? Was that 88? 90? It might have been the same year, even.

You were definitely in the ballpark. Maybe a little humility next time. It might have been the same year even. You were definitely in the ballpark. Yeah, you definitely... Maybe a little humility next time. Yeah, the only guy that wasn't up prancing around took this shit down. Hey, man. Babe Ruth led the league in strikeouts, but nobody fucking remembers that.

I go for the fucking fence every goddamn time. Jay. And pop out. Jay, can I give Jay a one inch punch for giving if I get a point? Can I just

have a point and also punch him? It's over. Who are you playing for, Big Jay? Brian. Brian. Here, give these to him. Brian, you won copies of my CD, Professional Humoridian, available on AST Records, and Graham's CD, Comedians Gotta Boo Boo. That's right, Brian.

Available at ComedyFilmNerds.com. Congratulations. Yeah. But now here's where things get interesting. Because I'm going to have members of the audience play against people on the stage for a chance to win more prizes. What? So since Big Jay won, let's start with him. The first person that Big Jay calls up here that can beat him will win a lovely prize as well.

Who would you like to play against, Big Jay? Look out and pick somebody based on creative name tag. Since I kicked the shit out of Graham, I'm going to go with the gentleman wearing his palm strike shirt. How about that? Oh, he's got a beautiful palm strike shirt on, so come down this way, sir, and step up here on the stage. What's your name? GC?

GC? GC? Alright. Alright, GC, don't try to look at the answers. And you know what? Also, go stand over there. Go stand next to Rob. Rob will let you use his microphone. You can sit here.

You can sit here. I want these people to be able to see me. Don't try to talk into the microphone. Just sit here. And if you talk into it, I'm going to make you talk into it like a dick. A dick that hangs straight down. It looks like a dick and you are a dick.

I want some cocoa butter. Give it up. You can have a little bit of cocoa butter. His initials GC stand for cocoa butter. He's kind of dumb looking. Okay. stand for Cocoa Butter. He's kind of dumb looking. He's got a Palm Strike t-shirt on. How smart can you look?

Those are also available at comedyfilmnerds.com. He can't get Cocoa Butter out of the bottle. That's how dumb he is. Well, because we've replaced it with ketchup. Yeah, lube up, GC. Okay, he's all lubed. And we're going to play you against Big J. This is heads up.

We'll let you pick a category. Can I wait until he's done rubbing his penis? Talk into the dangling penis. We'll let you pick a category, GC. Would you like to play musical biopics, westerns, or in theaters now? Westerns.

Everybody's had a long time to think about westerns. We've all got some in our head. Look how lubricated his hands are. Jesus. Yuck. He's like getting ready to fist somebody. Fist strike. 1993,

1994, or 2007? GC, which year would you like to play? Could you say the years one more time? Yes, I can. Could you talk into the penis one more time? I said 83, 84, 2007.

You said 93, I thought you said. I said 47, 22, 2007. You said 93, I thought you said. I said 47, 22, 86, hike. What did I say? 93? He's now moisturizing his whole forearms. 93, 94, or 2007?

94, please. I like how long people take to think about that. Two and a half stars? Eh, please. I like how long people take to think about that. Two and a half stars. Eh, okay. I'm not going to argue. He calls it epic length. That's a good clue. Epic length.

And then he also says, the special edition has 20 more minutes. And it's a western, and there are a shit ton of names. There are... 21 names. Yeah, GC, start the bidding. How many names do you think you can get this Western from 1994 that Leonard Maltin gives two and a half stars?

Ten names. Epic length. Ten names. Ten names. Nine. Get this over with. He said nine. He says nine names. Nine. So unnerving. Eight. Eight names. Name it.

Name it. Okay, here we go. GC's going to win a prize. I have a good feeling about this. The names are Martin Cove, John Doe. John Doe. Why am I pronouncing that weird? John Doe. Keep doing that. Johane Doe.

Brett Cullen, Taya Leone, Karen Grassley, Mackenzie Astin, Betty Buckley, and Annabeth Gish. Betty Buckley and Annabeth Gish Those are all Those are your eight names From a 1994 movie Two and a half stars It's a western They're gang banging him

With microphones Do you have any idea buddy I had an idea Have you Did you do this one before Do you have any idea, buddy? I had an idea. Have you... I thought you... Did you do this one before? Oh, you think you're being thrown off by having heard it already?

I might have. I'm going to take a stab at it. I can't keep track of this shit. Gosh. Unforgiven. Damn it. No. People in the audience, no.

That's 93, and that would have been four stars for Shizzle. Betty Buckley wasn't in the audience, no. That's 93, and that would have been four stars for Shizzle. Betty Buckley wasn't in Unforgiven. James Gammon passed away recently. Mare Winningham, Joe Beth Williams, Tom Sizemore, Isabella Rossellini, Bill Pullman, Catherine O'Hara,

Michael Madsen. Wyatt Earp is the answer. Wyatt Earp, yeah. Mark Harmon, Jeff Fahey, Gene Hackman, Dennis Quaid, and Kevin Costner. Wyatt Earp. Kevin Costner was in Wyatt Earp is the answer. Wyatt Earp. Yeah, they came out at the same time. Mark Harmon, Jeff Fahey, Gene Hackman, Dennis Quaid, and Kevin Costner. Wow. Wyatt Earp. Damn it.

Kevin Costner was in Wyatt Earp. Dennis Quaid played Wyatt Earp, right? No, Tombstone was... Kurt Russell played Wyatt Earp. Yeah, yeah. Costner was wider. Am I still playing for Brian?

Oh, Dennis Quaid was the guy who had leukemia or whatever. Tuberculosis, Doc Holliday. Yeah, yeah. Played much better

by Val Kilmer in Tombstone. Yeah, yeah. Val Kilmer. All right. Now that that's settled, get off the stage, JC.

Thank you for playing. Thanks for playing, dude. Thanks a lot, man. Thanks a lot. We have, as a consolation prize, we have Graham's CD. So enjoy that. Oh, my God. I really, I feel like I just delivered a baby after shaking his hand.

Rob's. Jesus. That cocoa butter is unnerving. That's so funny. In my mind, I really took Kevin Costner out of Wyatt Earp. I thought Dennis Quaid played Wyatt Earp and Kevin Costner had nothing to do with it. I was like, this app is fucked up. But yeah, he was Doc Holliday.

Okay. Fair enough. So, nice job. Do you want to pick another person? Sure. Let's see. I'm going to go... Wait, no. You already picked her once. Pick a Sure. Let's see. I'm going to go... Wait, no. You already picked her once. Pick a girl. Let me see. Pick a girl.

Somebody that's going to win. Want somebody that's going to win. This guy says he's going to win. All right. Right here. On the corner. Right here on the corner. I can't see his name tag. What's your name tag say? Casey. It's a girl's name. Stand between these two guys and let someone else hold the microphone for you. That's your name tag say? Casey. It's a girl's name. Stand between these two guys and let

someone else hold the microphone for you. That's enough of that shit. We don't need more of that dangling penis thing. It's distracting. Doug, I want you to know... I feel like the teacher punishing the class clown for all of his penis dangling fun. See, that guy's

leaving. This is... This podcast is being ruined with your phallic microphone work. What's that, sir? I play at home and I'm good. Now, what game are we talking about? Is that fucking Cocoa Butter, the board game?

No, that's called Shoots and Ladders Okay So Kevin Costner is in Tombstone I mean Wyatt Earp Okay, here we go We're going to let you start the bidding What's your name again? I'm sorry

Casey, alright Casey Would you like a In Theaters Now, Sylvester Stallone, or set in Seattle? I'll go Seattle. Here we go. Seattle. This is from 1987. You don't get a choice because I'm out of movies.

They didn't make that many movies here. 1987. And it's two and a half stars. I think that's legit. Somebody's disagreeing. Leonard Maltin says about the movie, he says that it runs hot and cold.

And then he also says... He also says later it was a TV series. So it's hot and cold, two and a half stars, later it was a TV series. Don't yell out. Don't yell out. And it's set in Seattle. And there are nine names. Stop muttering, everybody.

Nine names. What? The penis mic is back. How many names can you get it in, Casey? Negative one. Oh. I'm here to tell you, you better deliver on that one. Name it.

Name it, he says. Harry and the Hendersons with future guest John Lithgow. That's correct. Whoa. That was nice. That's correct. Whoa! That was nice. That was impressive. Can I one-inch punch him?

That was amazing. You win courtesy of Rob Hubel a Children's Hospital t-shirt with Rob Corddry with Rob Corddry's scary clown face on it. And you can see that show

on Adult Swim on what it's called? Cartoon Network. Adult Swim, yeah. Sunday nights. Adult Swim on Cartoon Network. And here, also, let's also give you

a copy of Graham's DVD live from Afghanistan. He entertains the troops quite often and we all love him for that. Thank you, Casey him for that. Thank you, Casey, for playing. Casey!

Okay, so we've got to wrap this up soon, so let's have one more person. Graham and Rob, you put your heads together and pick somebody. We'll have one more person play against the two of you and we'll see if somebody can win. All right, it's going to be a lady. Rob, you put your heads together and pick somebody. We'll have one more person play against the two of you, and we'll see if somebody can win. All right, it's going to be a lady. Ladies with their shirt off.

No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Wet t-shirt contest. You know what? Way, way, way in the back. That girl in the white waving her hands right there. Yeah, there you go. Come on up.

Yeah, get up here, young lady. In the white top. Come on up. Come through these beads over here. That'll be sexy. Oh, there's two of them? Come around that way. The girl in the white top. Yeah, there you go. Come on up. Yeah, get up here, young lady. Come through these beads over here. That'll be sexy. Oh, there's two of them? The girl in the white top. She's making her way. Here she comes. Through the beads, up the stairs.

Where's your name tag? Yeah, she doesn't have a name tag. So thanks for coming by. Why did you pick somebody that doesn't have a name tag? I couldn't see back there. I thought you had it. Oh, this guy.

Here we go, he made one for her. Oh, hey, Asian guy came prepared. All right, that's great. He's got school supplies with him at all times. Way to go, future doctor. Jessica. All right, Jessica. That's her name, Jessica.

Jessica has a name tag. Don't beat her up everybody that brought ones themselves As you're leaving tonight Maybe she won't win That'll be fun if she doesn't win What? Thanks for coming up here Jessica You think you're good at this game? No I thought my friend was good

But she made me come up here instead What the fuck What the fuck? Okay, that's it. God damn it. That's it. What the fuck? I tried. There's like 90% name tags in here,

and you pick the one person who doesn't have a name tag and also admits to not being able to play the game. Let's get this over with. Have you seen movies before? She might win though. She could, you know, she's in between the two of you. I could be the underdog. Alright. Here we go.

Jessica, the categories are growing slim. Would you like westerns in theaters now or Sylvester Stallone? What happened to the musical one? All right, musical biopics. Here we go.

Would you like one from 1986 or 1991? 91, please. Here we go. She asked so nicely. Would you like one from 1986 or 1991? 91, please. Here we go. She asked so nicely. Two and a half stars from Leonard Maltin. He calls it vivid. That's a porn company, isn't it?

It is now, yeah, but I don't think it was in 91. Maybe it was. And then he says, the director appears briefly as a professor. Director of the movie appears briefly as a professor. And it's a musical? It's from 1991. It's a musical biopic, so that means it's about someone who's in music.

So there are some musical numbers in the movie. You thought it was like a musical? So it's not going to be Sound of Music. No, because I believe Sound of Music was made 30 years prior to 1991. I don't think

World War II was going on during 1991. Pick me, pick me, I know one movie. Okay. But you know, you can pass and maybe win anyway. There are... 21 names. I would like 20.

Okay, let's go to Graham next. Oh, alright. I'll take 17. Rob. It's your turn, Rob. We're letting Big J sit this out. I'll do it in 15. 15.

So you can bid less now, Jessica, if you'd like. Five. Whoa! What the fuck now? It's like, whoa! She's going to be out of here in no time. You know what, young lady? Name that movie!

Here we go. Five names. Good luck. Sound of Music. One of the great stars of Sound of Music. Costas Mandalore was in this movie. Wes Studi was in this movie.

He's an Indian actor, if that helps you. Bill Kunstler was in this movie. The famed dead attorney and human rights activist. Billy Vera of Billy Vera and the Beaters was in this movie.

What would you say if I... I don't know the rest of the song. And I don't want to pay for it. And then your fifth name is Bill Graham who was a legendary concert promoter. So that kind of might help.

Is it Evita? Yeah, there was that scene with that legendary concert promoter and the Indian in Evita. No, that is incorrect. I'll read the rest of the names. You guys yell it out when you know it. Crispin Glover. The Doors. Yes, The Doors. Yes, The is incorrect. I'll read the rest of the names. You guys yell it out when you know it. Crispin Glover. The Doors. Yes, The Doors. Crispin Glover

as Andy Warhol. I love your music. He's awesome. But thanks for playing our game, Jessica. Thank you so much, Jessica. Good job, Jessica. Thank you. Thank you for your enthusiasm. Nice job picking a contestant.

I will pick a better contestant. All right. Pick another one. Right here. The red. You're very excited. You're ready to go. Let's go.

On the front. You came early. Let's go. She's known a lot of the movies. I can tell. She's ready to play. It's going to be hard to get up here like the Golden Globe Awards. We have to fill while she works her way

through the crowd. There you go. That was pretty good. Here comes Jodi, everybody. Jodi! Come on. Do me proud. And, wow. We're running out of stuff. We've got to have a winner here. It's important that you win, Jodi.

We really want you to win. I'm my best. There's one left from each of these categories. In theaters now, Sylvester Stallone, or set in Seattle? Set in Seattle. Oh, shit. Oh, wait, I'm out of set in Seattle. No!

You can pick from all of them. Musical biopics, westerns, and theaters now are sliced alone. Apparently westerns. What? Not, you have to, it's based on what you might know. Not one guy in the audience saying western. Oh, you're with him, though. I am. Oh, okay.

So maybe he, she seems excited about that. She's like, yeah. Really shitty date. I don't want to get the back of my hand when i get home his name is rahim here's an exclamation point oh so it's rahim okay it's like that remember that show on the wb claghorn had an exclamation point for no reason all right so you're gonna go westerns because i'm gonna go in theaters now because that's what I want. Okay, in theaters now. There's one movie left that I picked that's in theaters now.

And Leonard says about it the following. He says... He says he came to this movie at a disadvantage because he loves the French. That's not what he said. I'm paraphrasing. He says he loves the French film on what it is based. That's what he says. And then he also says that

this film did nothing for me. So this movie didn't blow him. It didn't drive him home. It did nothing for him. And there are nine names. Start the bidding, Jessica. Jodi.

Jessica was the last one. I miss Jessica. She was so cute without her name tag. And her only knowing one movie. Oh yeah, let me just give you another clue. It's not Sound of Music. Nine names. Nine names?

She's taking them all, Graham. How many of them do you want? Three. Three. Rob. Rob How do you like that dick microphone in your face? I like it enough to say negative two names Oh shit

Alright Jody slash Jessica. Rob, name that movie. All right, so what's the movie and what are the two names? Yeah. I have a question. Are the names... You have to get them in the right order from top to bottom. Top billing to next billing.

Jennifer Schmucks, Paul Rudd, Steve Carell. It's the other way around, Steve Carell, Paul Rudd. Jody is our winner. Jody did it. You're really going to give Paul Rudd, Tom Dilley? One-inch death punch. If you one-inch punch a girl, it actually gives her a baby. Congratulations, Jody.

Eat a mic. congratulations jody eat a mic wow in your face is what aka that's what she meant to say eat a mic eat this dick mic why would it be steve carell then paul rudd because um steve carell's a bigger name yeah yeah the posters probably their names are left to right and rudd's is a little higher and steve carell's a little name. Yeah, the poster's probably their names are left to right and Rudd's is a little higher and Steve Carell's a little lower, but that translates in print as just Steve's first. Steve got top billing on that. So does Jodi win $10,000?

No, close. She won a copy of Doug Benson's Professional Humoridian and she won a Palm Strike t-shirt from Graham Elwood and she won a Too Drunk to Tweet t-shirt from me and donkeytees.com. There's all your stuff, Jody. Take

it all. Thank you so much. Nice to meet you. Good job playing the game. And normally there's so many losers tonight, I can't really get two people well just start yelling out people for me to call a shithead

okay I got it get ready with the end theme first of all round of applause for all these guys Rob Hubel he's in the other guys for a minute Graham Elwood he's available in stores now.

Big Irish J. Come down to Parlor Live in Bellevue, Washington to see him ply his trade for many great headliners. And as always, Rob Hubel, Graham Elwood, and Big Irish J are shitheads. Yeah! Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky

There's no room in his heart for you Cause Doug loves movies Thank you guys so much. That was so awesome. For you, because Doug loves movies. Thank you guys so much. That was so awesome. We really appreciate you coming out. And we'll see you over in the Shane room if you want to come by and say hi. Thank you.