Doug Loves Movies - Natalie Morales, Riki Lindhome, Kyle Anderson and Kevin Kraft guest
Episode Date: October 18, 2017Back at the UCB Franklin in Los Angeles, Doug welcomes Natalie Morales, Riki Lindhome, Kyle Anderson and Kevin Kraft to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California... Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming babies, sticky seeds with 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth.
There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug loves movies!
Hey, hey, hey everybody!
My name is Doug and I love movies.
This is I Love Movies.
Coming to you from our OG spot, the Upright Scissors Brigade Theater, Franklin location in Los Angeles, California.
It's Tuesday, October 17, 2017.
And I had a great time in Atlanta
at the Variety Playhouse,
and the premium ep that was recorded there
will be available in about a week
in the comedy album section of iTunes
for two bucks.
Lots of amazing name tags there.
What?
Rocky.
Rocky?
Did you change the word Rocky to Aaron?
Is E-R-I-N even the man spelling of Aaron?
Okay.
That guy's not used regular communication...
...techniques.
Dave Hart said a Braveheart.
Do you see how that works, Aaron?
Dave Hart said a Braveheart.
Do you see how that works, Aaron?
And perhaps one of the few Halloween-themed ones,
Patrick or Treat.
Yeah.
People have mixed feelings about it.
Can't win them all.
Thank you to everyone who brought name tags, and good luck to each and every one of you.
There's plenty for my four guests to choose from.
Doug Plugs, Douglas Movies is back here at UCB next Tuesday.
Same bat time, same bat room.
But in the meantime, I'm going to Raleigh, North Carolina
to do a late night stand-up show this Thursday.
Bring your name tags.
We will play Last Man Stanton
with audience members.
And also bring name tags for sure
to Douglas Movies on Saturday
at 420 at Good Nights.
More stand-up shows and podcast tapes
can be found at
DouglasMovies.com
That's DouglasMovies.com
Yeah!
I like that you guys are
a cagey bunch
because
it felt for a second there like you weren't gonna do it.
Like there was a nice
you know, LA still got the
dramatic pause down.
Or you could just be on the same page as me
and it was a different kind of pause.
In the prize bag we got a a Douglas Movies T-shirt,
a promotional tool CD,
a Star Wars pen.
I mean, it just says Star Wars on it.
I don't know what else about it is from that place
a long time ago, far, far away.
Some blunt wraps, some raw, whatever that is,
like it's like a fused hemp wick.
That's important, it's healthier to use a hemp wick.
I say fuck it.
Sounds like a character from Willow
and I didn't like that.
Sounds like a character from Willow And I didn't like that
Um
A tiny Peacemaker
Pipe and
A
Getting Doug with High mug
And one of these things where you like
You take it it's a little rubber thing
It's also from Peacemaker and you
Roll a joint around it
It just gives you a nice
end to suck on.
I know that's probably
not the best prize to end on.
But I'm very excited
about my four guests
and the potential guests
that they have.
Potential gifts.
Potential guests.
My guests have brought guests.
Please give a warm welcome to Kevin Kraft Kyle Anderson Natalie Morales and Ricky Lindholm
all of them are here I don't know if you guys are like professional audience members
but you're good
I hired them
they are making seven people sound like 400
I'm bad with numbers right now
and hearing and everything like 400. I'm bad with numbers right now.
Hi, everybody.
Hearing and everything.
Just make sure everybody greets the crowd.
I'll introduce you guys individually and
I'm kind of a feminist
so I'm going to introduce a dude first.
Alright.
Because I think that's what women want.
No, it's because he's our first time guest.
He's the only first time guest on the show tonight.
Let's hear it for Kyle Anderson, everybody.
Hi, Doug.
Host of Up All Afternoon on the EW radio on Sirius XM.
Yes, sir.
I think that's 105 on their dial.
See, you are good with numbers tonight, aren't you, Don?
Oh, well, I got that one right.
We'll see what happens when I bring the other guy from Sirius on.
I don't think I know his number.
You know what?
I do know your number.
We'll see if I know it a few minutes from now.
That's the great thing about marijuana,
is you're constantly surprised by your own abilities.
Lack thereof or how amazing they are.
Keep swinging either way all the time.
Kyle, you've listened to the program.
I've been on your show when you were on with a lady friend.
True.
Did you guys break up?
Yeah, it was a bad breakup.
Was it bad?
No, it was fine.
Okay.
We both got our own shows. We both won. Oh, you do? Yeah, yeah's bad breakup. Was it bad? No, it was fine. Okay. We both got our own shows.
We both won.
Oh, you do?
Yeah, yeah.
What's hers called?
She's still doing L.A. Daily.
L.A. Daily with Julia Cunningham.
Correct, sir.
All right.
You got the better title.
I'd like to think so.
I was going to say.
Because I like to think that I'm the Rhonda Shear of Entertainment Weekly Radio.
Shit yeah, Rhonda Shear.
She hosted a thing called up all night
and his show is
up all afternoon
yeah
the highest person here
actually gets the jokes
but thank you for being here
and I would love to come on
up all afternoon
I hear you have like a guy on every Monday and all you do is talk about what happened the night before Thank you for being here. Thanks for having me, sir. I would love to come on up all afternoon.
I hear you have a guy on every Monday,
and all you do is talk about what happened the night before on The Deuce.
That is a thing that happens on my show. I would like to be one of those for some show.
Let's pick a show, and I'll come in every week and just talk about it.
What show are you watching that you want to recap, Doug?
The Deuce.
Okay, sure.
I want that guy out.
I want his job. That guy's fired. We'll talk about The deuce. I want that guy out. I want his job.
That guy's fired. We'll talk about the deuce.
It's a fun show to recap because I don't think
they even know where it's going. Not at all.
I had Method Man on my show today. He has
no idea what's happening on that show.
He didn't know what was happening at How High
either.
Wait, do you recap
any reality shows?
Not really.
I feel like the only show that I ever want to talk about
is The Real Housewives of Orange County right now.
When people want to talk to me about these real shows,
I just sort of block it out.
I think what you like is some real EW Daily shit.
I probably would.
Yeah, you go on with Julia Cunningham.
Yeah, I think I'm taking your ex's side on this
I'm gonna be in her show
that's fair
that was probably
a dividing line
between the two of you
like she probably
does like those reality shows
oh she loves that
yeah
that's why you needed
your own shows
yeah yeah
cause I don't give a shit
yeah that stuff's brutal
I liked it for a little while
like when
you know
Flavor Flav
was trying to pick between ladies and one of them shit on the floor like when you know Flavor Flav was trying to pick
between ladies
and one of them
shit on the floor
oh that was good
Flavor of Love
yeah Flavor of Love
pardon me for not
knowing the name
every episode
that only happened once
but it was a good one
yeah that was a good one
yeah
cause she wouldn't
own up to it
so it was like
mystery shit
yeah
the Flavor of Love
is doo doo it was weird yeah you mystery shit. The flavor of love is doo doo.
It was weird. Yeah you know what the flavor of love is.
Oh no. Did I get to it? Was that good?
Yeah. That means
you deserve an introduction for that one.
Natalie Morales is here everybody.
Morales.
Morales.
Yeah that's how you pronounce it.
Yeah I like to lay into it
It's fun
I have a friend of mine
Dustin Ibarra
And he can't roll his R's
And his last name's Ibarra
So it's hilarious
But that's two R's
Mine has one R
Which means you don't roll
You don't roll it
Just fucking say it
Just fucking say it
And then say we'll be right back
But first
This is today on NBC
She's not on that anymore Doug
it doesn't work what does she do now
she does Access Hollywood now
oh that's not an upgrade for you
it's bad enough being mistaken
for somebody from the Today Show
but now you're mistaken for
she does do Today every now and then
I just did Today with her
like two weeks ago
we're talking about
Natalie Morales
who goes by the same name as me.
But did they just bring her back
for the bit?
No, they didn't.
I kept pitching.
For years,
I would pitch
for April Fool's.
They would just come back
from a commercial break
and I'd be at the desk.
Yeah, just do everything
normal.
And they never did it.
So now she's not on it anymore
and it's already wasted. Well, now maybe you could do it like she. And they never did it. So now she's not on it anymore. And it's already wasted.
Well, now maybe you could do it like she came back to the show or something.
I think she's probably missed.
Natasha and I were on the Today Show last year.
And the person who interviewed us was Celine Dion.
And she had had all the wine.
Why would they have Celine Dion interviewing the rest of another period don't know
she definitely had not seen the show and her big statement about the whole thing was that her photo
was not on the card like on the today show card she wanted a drawing of her on the card and we
were like can we talk about okay no all right um All right. Yeah. She was very drunk. Damn.
Yeah.
It was fun.
I need tape of that.
Oh, it's so good.
Oh, I need that.
Me and Natasha are like just smiling.
All right.
Are we going to get to...
Oh, the segment's over.
Thank you.
All right, Ricky.
I'm trying to talk to Natalie.
Okay, okay.
Sorry.
It doesn't have to be about you all the time.
Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
Star of Battle of the Sexes.
Well.
All right.
I thought people would start clapping.
Co-star.
It's been in limited release.
Have you guys seen it, though?
I liked it a lot.
Thank you three.
Hashtag Doug Diggs it.
Yeah.
For going to see it.
I liked it very much.
Thank you, Doug.
It's very interesting.
You know, I lived through it.
I was young, so I didn't really know.
You know, I didn't really pick a side or anything,
but the Bobby Riggs and Billie Jean King thing is a really interesting story.
Doug is like the Benjamin Button of comedy.
He's like, how are you around when that happened?
That's crazy.
That was 1973.
You remember that?
Dang.
Because I am 73.
Thank you.
Thank you. IMDb takes down down our ages and then you do that you outed yourself i didn't know i did say it you're right um yeah it's kind of crazy how uh
when you watch that movie that like it you know it takes place 40 something years ago um i can't
do math oh yeah i wasn't alive thank it. But now things are all better.
Fake news, fake news. It's so the same.
It's so crazy the way
that they, I mean, it's really
really bananas. Billie Jean King
who's obviously one of the best tennis players of all
time met her husband
Larry King, not the same one.
They should do a swap.
Is the caller there?
They met in college
and Larry King had a scholarship
to tennis and Billie Jean King did not
because they did not give scholarships to women
at the time.
For sports, yeah.
It's great. There's so many good things in the movie
about how cigarettes came along
and actually lifted up women
in the world of tennis
because Virginia Slims promoted the tournament.
Sarah Silverman's in it.
She's fantastic in it.
Yeah, she's good.
I like it.
Ricky Lindholm is here, everybody.
Hi.
Hello.
I guess you already talked to me.
We already talked to you enough.
We already really are all caught up on what's going on with you.
When does another period come back?
January 23rd.
So not for a while.
It feels like forever.
Yeah, that is a long-ass time.
But, you know, that'll be satisfying to finally get it.
I know, right?
A year and a half between seasons.
You know, to wait that long for your period is really frustrating.
I know.
I've had that moment before.
But just ignore what the doctors say
four or five months later.
They're like,
yes.
I haven't got my period
in a long time.
It's going to be cool
when it does come back.
How many episodes?
Like 20?
11.
Oh,
that's an interesting number.
Well,
we've had 11
in the last season too
because we just kind of
filmed too much stuff
and it was supposed to be 10
and then we're like, we have more material.
What, so you could just have one thing flow into another
or do you like to do a two-parter?
Two-parter.
Yeah, okay.
That makes sense.
And then we sort of like fill it in
with a lot of hip hop music and cutaways
because it's not quite enough.
We needed like 42 minutes and we had like 38.
So we're like flashbacks montage
oh that's good long bumpers yeah because you could do a montage that makes fun of montages
but it's straight up a montage it's a montage yeah i love it yeah kate and i wrote a montage
song but it didn't make it in there oh yeah can you believe it fuck has kate been on camera on it yes she's been on it like maybe
five times oh okay she there's a episode where i stab her character in the eye with a piece of
glass we get in a fight and i break a wine glass and i impale her through the eye and then the rest
of the time she has an eye patch and when she lifts it up it's like a glass eye that she brought
herself unprompted she's like i have an idea she got it made. It was like a milky eye.
She has a milky eye
in the show
that she went
and got made.
Milky eye.
Yeah.
Such a great term.
It's so good.
It's like blue.
It's like an indie band.
Yeah.
It feels like a sex
thing too, right?
Yeah.
A milky eye.
I'm going to give you
a milky eye.
Yeah.
It probably is, right?
This is such a great festival.
Do you guys want to go see
Milky Eye on the Bigfoot stage?
And also here joining us
is returning champion
Kevin Kraft, everybody.
Thank you.
Hello, friends.
Thank you for having me back, Doug.
From Jason Ellis
on Faction Talk
Sirius 103.
Nailed it.
You remembered the numbers.
And also,
the last time you were on the show,
it was especially sweet because you took down
Sam Levine.
Yeah, I was not expecting that.
Who now can never
appear on the show again.
I have banished him.
As long as you're alive.
Fuck.
Don't say that.
He's going to wake up under my bed and kill me in my sleep.
Yeah, no, he's got a lot of fans,
so you don't want to be the guy who just got him booted from the show.
But somebody's got to take the fall.
But no, he'll be back,
and I'd like to get you guys in a rematch, to be honest with you.
But in the meantime, you're taking on these three.
How do you feel today?
I feel like it's a strong panel.
Yeah, this is going to be tough.
I know Kyle sees a lot of movies.
That's true.
We run into each other a lot at the halls at work.
Like, literally, because they're very narrow halls.
Yes.
Yeah.
the halls at work.
Like literally,
because they're very narrow halls.
Yes.
Yeah.
I see medium amount of movies,
so you're going to do okay on this part.
But you're in movies.
Which you have a leg up on.
Yeah, I'm in movie.
Let's see.
Do you recognize this tagline?
It was the battle of the sexes.
Battle of the sexes. Battle of the Sexes.
Is that the tagline?
No, but might as well be.
Could be.
You know, I mean, the title is the tagline.
Yeah.
It just lays it out in fancy words.
I used to always watch Battle of the Network Stars.
I think that was around the same time.
Is that back now?
Yeah, it's back.
It is? Did you watch that one? It had like Ronda Rousey or now? Yeah, it's back. It is?
Did you watch that one?
It had like Ronda Rousey or something?
Yeah, Ronda Rousey had to coach one of the teams.
No, she was a coach.
Oh, I see.
Each team had a coach.
One team had her and the other team had Hector Elizondo.
Oh, no.
For a physical type of challenge?
I couldn't think of who they had, so I just
threw Hector under the bus.
Didn't he die?
Can you imagine Ronda Rousey?
I think he did die.
So rest in peace,
and be glad you don't have to be the coach
of Network of the Stars.
Did he just do physical challenges?
Did he die because
Kerry Marshall died and his career was challenges? Did he die because Gary Marshall died
and his career was done?
Did they go one after the other
like an old couple?
You think there was
some sort of pact involved?
I think Hector died
before that.
Oh, he died before Gary.
I think so.
That's why Gary was like,
well, if he can't be
in every one of my movies,
what's the point of living?
Yeah.
All right.
Hot take on death of living? Yeah. All right. Hot take on
death, Doug.
Yeah.
I got a question
for each and every
one of you.
I'm going to start
with Kevin because
he's used to it.
He just had this
question a few
days ago.
What was the
last movie you
saw?
I saw Blade
Runner 2049.
Yep. There's people that love it.
I think they're robots.
I might
be a robot as well. I loved it.
Yeah. Some people just fucking
go for the ride and other people are like
eh eh.
Yeah. My girlfriend wanted
to claw her own eyes out. Oh my god.
And you enjoyed it while she was squirming the whole time?
We take turns sitting through shit
the other person doesn't like.
It was her turn.
That is a long sit if she wasn't liking it.
Holy shit, you're going to have to find some long ass,
maybe watch the Traveling Pants movies back to back.
That movie's longer than all the
Katherine Heigl movies put together,
right?
I think you're right.
It's crazy.
I mean,
I get why people
didn't like it.
There were definitely
slow parts,
but I was hooked
in the whole
2,049 minutes.
They could have
called it Blade Runner
slow parts.
But,
all right.
Yeah, I'm happy
for people that
enjoyed it
I really am
yeah I mean
that's a bummer
to sit through
all that
it was rough
for me
I was like
yeah I was like
what is this all
why
why is this
happening
um
they did a good
job of sort of
recreating the
Blade Runner
vibe but it's
like with
nothing
you know
no fucking
uh Roy Batty.
And there was no Doug Benson.
He really cared about what happened to him.
Doug Benson in the original Blade Runner?
He was.
It's true.
Was he a replicant?
That's not why I didn't like this one.
I'm in this one too
there's just a lot of sleet
so you can't see me
you were hiding behind the sleet
it's like they made it
they had like a bleaker meter
and just turned it up like 10
10 notches
and so it's just that much bleaker
but nothing else changes
in the world of Blade Runner
I guess there's replicants that are more human.
Have I said too much?
Applaud if you haven't seen it.
Don't!
Wow.
I like that.
Bold stance.
Yeah, people love it.
Kyle?
I loved it.
I thought it was great.
Was that the last movie you saw?
No, the last movie I saw was a film that's coming out this Friday called The Snowman with Michael Fassbender.
He's in that?
Yeah.
He's hunting serial killers in Oslo.
The snowman is a euphemism for a large dick.
They don't have him on the billboards.
That's a mistake.
Yeah, they don't,
do they? No, it's a drawing of a snowman
and a creepy note.
Because they assume you love winter.
The note says something like,
you could have saved him. Dear police,
I gave you all the clues. You could have saved him.
Love the snowman.
Yeah, no, and it's also written
in like a child's scroll.
So like, why is it child bingo?
Because he has twigs for pants.
Oh, it's harder for him to, he just
has to write block letters. It's difficult.
Can't really
hold a pen. Yeah.
Did you like it? Not really.
Yeah.
First of all, I don't think it's your thing, right?
You're not into that genre to begin with.
I like murder as much as the next guy.
But isn't it kind of like he's walking around with a flashlight for a couple minutes
and then a cat runs across the room.
Is that a genre now?
And then somebody throws a snowball through a window and he's like,
is that the snowman?
No.
Then there's a kid with his tongue stuck to a pole.
Isn't it like Christmas Story?
It's just like Christmas Story.
People dying.
Yeah, except they decapitate the mom.
That's the only difference.
That'd be an amazing pitch.
Okay, it's exactly the Christmas Story.
Mom, no head.
Yeah.
That's it.
Yeah.
That would fix that movie.
That's the big difference.
I mean, people love that movie too.
Who loves Christmas Story?
I do. Yeah, yeah. Who loves Christmas Story?
I do.
Bunch of fucking leg lamps.
That's a good insult.
Right?
That sounds harsh.
It's like calling them muggles.
Natalie, what was the last movie you saw?
Was it Blade Runner 2049?
Interestingly enough, it was a rewatch of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. And you didn't know. The Muggles.
That was a perfect segue.
I just said Muggles, which was really great.
Yeah, that's number two.
Why that one?
Why start at number two on a rewatch?
I didn't start at number two.
You asked me what the last one I watched was.
So you started rewatching it all?
Yeah.
Is that first one, it's rough for me because they're just too young.
They are.
I know.
I know.
I agree.
I almost, I feel like, oh like oh man i'm gonna dork out
uh i feel i feel like five gets real good and then like i think it's five from what i remember
that like should have been nominated for an oscar like it's so good it's such a well-made movie and
i prefer those but you sure it's not three i wanted to start prisoner of azkaban no although
gary oldman is in it my favorite favorite. No, with the Death Eaters
at the beginning?
You guys, it's so good.
I like the part
where they throw a rock
at their own head.
It's very good.
My mom...
It's got a nice
time loop in it.
Yeah.
But yeah,
I liked it all
once they got a little older.
And also,
number two has
Too Much Dobby. No, Dobby also, number two has too much Dobby.
No, Dobby's so great.
Way too much Dobby.
No, Dobby's the best.
Dobby redeems himself later when he comes back
and is the saddest thing that happens in any...
No, don't ruin it.
Maybe some people haven't seen it.
Ruin it for who?
Maybe people haven't seen it.
What kind of asshole?
She hasn't seen it.
I'm in the middle of reading book four.
Okay, don't ruin it for Ricky.
Wait, so you've decided that you're going to read all the books
and then watch all the movies?
Yeah, well, post-election, I stopped being able to take in anything
that was real hard.
So I only watch Real Housewives and read Harry Potter.
I just make things light for myself.
I think it's good.
By the way, it does get dark, but in the best way.
In a way I can handle.
Yes, it's wonderful wonderful i can handle that
like i can't re-watch the wire right now no like no
oh this is heavier than i remember yeah i'm re-watching it because uh my mom for christmas
uh wants to take me in orlando to as she calls it the new Hattery Pottery Land.
So I thought
it would be good.
Yeah, but it's far from new.
Well, I haven't been there.
Yeah, right.
She also doesn't know
when things are new.
So, yeah.
And she thinks it's pottery
which is awesome.
Hattery Pottery.
Hattery Pottery.
They added
there's two parts to it.
You have to pay to go
to two different parks
to see all of it.
Apparently you can take
that train which I'm very excited about.
The train is neat because it moves like a block.
And then you're in the next land.
I'm thrilled.
I enjoyed it.
Ricky, do you have an answer?
The last movie I saw, okay, this is going to be on theme with what I'm talking about.
It was Over the Top, the Sylvester Stallone arm wrestling movie.
Yes. I re-watched that. You Sylvester Stallone arm wrestling movie. Yes.
I rewatched that.
You were just like,
uh,
I don't,
I don't like real life.
I'm going to watch an arm wrestling movie.
Yeah.
I've been disassociating.
And so I watched over the top on my iPad,
on my couch and drink wine.
And I was like,
it's going to be fine.
No one's going to nuke us.
We're good.
I can still write.
Um,
yeah.
So you watch him,
you know,
Sylvester Stallone,
he's got the monster truck and then he gets offered the truck and he's like, no, I'm still going. Yeah. So you watch him. Sylvester Stallone's got the monster truck.
And then he gets offered the truck.
And he's like, no, I'm still going to arm wrestle.
It's very brave.
I never finished that movie.
The last time I saw that movie was during a Benson interruption.
I was in the audience.
And you ran out.
Reggie Watts gave me an edible.
Oh.
That's a good way to watch over the top.
I sat at the back of the cine family slowly sinking
into my chair wondering what the fuck was going on you can't do it and i had to leave no no i became
the chair uh and then i i could only concentrate on how much sweat was in that movie and i didn't
never finish it's a lot of sweat. I never finished it.
Was it good?
It's really good.
I watched Teen Wolf also recently and there's so much sweat
in that movie.
I was a little high.
There's so much sweat
during the basketball games.
You just laugh to yourself
if you're me.
It's just dripping, dripping.
We should watch movies together.
I think we should.
Yeah, it'll be fun.
They probably do
shoot those scenes all day
so they're just constantly
running around
so they all got so extra sweaty.
I was in Teen Wolf 2.
You were?
The MTV show?
In the boxing one, the Jason Bateman one.
That's on my queue.
Yeah, that's part two.
I'm in one with Michael J. Fox.
You're saying I'm in Teen Wolf also.
Are you the guy in the bleachers
who has his nutsack hanging out?
No, I don't have... I am in the bleachers though. I guy in the bleachers who has his nutsack hanging out? No, I don't have...
Wait, what were you... I just saw it.
I am in the bleachers, though. I'm in the bleachers.
Oh. Yeah.
Near
nutsack guy?
I don't recall nutsack guy.
I wish you were
nutsack guy. Were you also
a replicant in Teen Wolf?
Atmosphere people are weird sometimes.
You just want to get noticed.
Yeah, that guy had a good gimmick.
Yeah.
All right.
You know, we started late,
so I have no idea how we're doing on time.
So I'll ask you real quickly,
just because it's Ragnaroktober,
people want good horror movie recommendations.
Can you recommend another?
Do you remember what you recommended last time, Kevin?
Yeah, last week I recommended High Tension.
Okay.
That guy agrees.
That guy knows what's up.
Lonely clap.
The realization that he was alone in that.
And what about,
have you seen,
I mean,
you got another one?
As a matter of fact, the Chris Farley interview style.
The crazies. As a matter of fact, the Chris Farley interview style. The Crazies,
the 2010 remake
with Timothy Oily fans.
That thing is fucking nuts, right?
It's pretty creepy.
Yeah, I don't know
if I can handle that one.
And it kind of flew under the radar.
I don't feel like it got
the respect it deserves,
but it's a solid horror movie.
Something about crazy people.
That might be my number one fear
in just modern day life
is how crazy people are.
Yeah, there's a lot of crazy people in The Crazies.
You know, crazy people used to mean
Dudley Moore and Daryl Hannah.
And The Crazies is just like,
Ah!
Yeah, it's pretty fucked up.
Like fucking It without the clown makeup.
All right.
Kyle, do you have a scary movie?
I love a horror movie called Deathgasm.
Are you familiar with it?
That's a real title of a movie.
I'm intrigued.
Yeah, it's called Death...
I believe it's from Australia.
Yeah.
And it's all about a...
Australian in the house.
Yeah.
It's all about a... Australian in the house. Yeah. It's all about a teenage metal band
who discover a song that is,
when they play it,
unleashes a demon.
And then they have to fight said demon.
It's fucking awesome.
By having an orgasm?
Well, the band is called Deathgasm.
Because what's more metal than Deathgasm?
That's so metal.
It's pretty metal.
That sounds awesome.
And also beautiful.
Super dope, yeah.
Like it's a beautiful thought.
Yeah, absolutely.
It's a real sort of,
you know, who wouldn't
want to die like that?
Yeah.
Like at the peak
of an orgasm.
It sounds great.
It does actually.
Anyway, just my opinion.
She's not wrong.
Yeah.
Well, now we all
have something to strive for.
It would horrify the other person Hopefully you're just masturbating
It would be very traumatic for whoever
You guys, when you fuck somebody to death
It is not
It's not a victimless crime
Because you'll feel bad about it for the rest of your life
The dead person won't know shit, but you
are not going to be happy. Natalie,
a scary movie wreck? What's happening with your nose
right now?
Are you just rusting?
The microphone's keeping me from falling over.
Sometimes you've got to set your
nose on top. Sometimes I think about the next
person to use this mic and I'm like, they're going to want to
smell my skin.
You know, I have a quick question for you guys.
My first language
was Spanish and I feel like I can't
say, oh boy,
I can't say the
genre name without just saying
horror. Like, I try to say horror.
Horror.
How do people say it? So it sounds like
horror. Horror?
Is it just everyone? Horror. Oh, so it's horror. No So it sounds like horror. Horror? Is it just, is it just everyone?
Horror.
Horror.
Oh, so it's horror.
No, it's not horror.
Horror.
It's not.
Horror.
Like that casino.
It's a horror movie.
Horror.
Horror.
Horror.
Horror.
Horror.
It's like saying Rory.
Miguel Horror.
Like no one can actually do it.
Okay, so I'm not alone.
No one can do it.
Horror.
Horror.
Horror.
I'm not a fan of horror movies.
It's like that goddamn word macabre.
I could say that all day.
It's macabre.
Macabre.
I can say that one.
Well, you're one of the late miserables.
I'm not a fan of horror movies,
although I did just watch Hocus Pocus.
Yeah.
I feel like maybe
this should go for movie number.
I'm so angry at this crowd
for that reaction.
Come on.
What do you got against
Hocus Pocus, Doug?
Hocus Pocus is great.
Do you not love Bette Midler?
Bette Midler's the best.
It's like practical magic
with one more.
No.
That's how they pitched it.
Super hot.
Yeah, super hot.
Sarah Jessica Parker, she's so hot in that movie.
Kathy and Jimmy only talks out of the side of her mouth the whole time.
Also super hot, right?
She's like a witch who had a stroke in the movie.
Like she made that choice.
And sticks with it.
It's so great.
I'm a witch.
What are you up to?
I'm up to hey.
Pocus, pocus my ass. a witch. What are you up to? I've got the hay. Poke is, poke is
my ass.
Ricky, what do you got
for us? Scary movie.
My favorite scary movie as of late is
It Follows.
It's so good, right?
I thought it was a sequel to It for a second
and I was like, has that come out yet?
Then I realized. I have a really advanced
copy, you guys. You'll see it in two years.
No, It Follows is so good.
It's kind of like
you get an STD
and then people
start following you around.
Someone fucks you
and then people
start appearing everywhere
and following you.
That's the plot, right?
Demon STD.
It's like Tag,
you're it,
but with an STD.
Yeah.
And a monster.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's like all like, it's like all like it's like but
it's low budge so it's all a lot of it's in your head it's a lot of the psychological it's so good
yeah people like it the sequel to it is called it too still clowning
here's the part of the show
where Bert turns it off
because I'm about to say
let the games begin!
We got a lot of name tags.
Well, not a lot of name tags,
but enough name tags.
Plenty of name tags.
So, ladies and gentlemen,
pick who you'd like to play for.
Go grab a name tag
from the hands of Ricky.
He goes in fast and hot.
And while the rest of my guests figure out who they want to play for,
we'll go to a brief commercial message.
We'll be right back.
Hey, everybody.
No ads this ep.
I just wanted to remind you that you can purchase for $2 at Douglovesmovies.com or eventually
on iTunes in the comedy album section the Dougloves movies from the Variety Playhouse
in Atlanta, Georgia with Kari Payton, Ross Marquand, Arden Mirren, Jason Ritter, Dustin Ibarra, and Kevin Pollock.
It was a huge, fun show, and I hope you check it out.
But speaking of fun shows, let's get back to this one.
Enjoy.
All right, we're back.
Who are you playing for, Ricky? I am playing for, I think it's a plan, we're back. Who are you playing for, Ricky?
I am playing for, I think it's a plan, this is 40.
This is Justin.
Yeah, you got it.
It's not that clever, but there's cookies on the poster.
Yeah, they attached some Chips Ahoy.
Yeah, that is enticing.
Yes.
Are they empty or are they full?
Oh, I'm assuming they're full.
Can we break those open?
Yes, we can.
That'd be such a good trick.
That's our prize.
That's what I'm saying.
Yeah.
Sweet.
You put those on there to get you to pick it, and it worked.
Every time.
Did you know that this was a pun for ships ahoy?
Oh, my God.
I finally get it.
I blew all your minds.
I just realized, by the way,
that Diagon Alley is just diagonally.
Diagonally, that's right.
What's Diagon Alley?
It's from Harry Potter.
Have you not gotten there
where they shop for the...
I don't think so.
If you're in book three...
Oh, wait, where they go to get...
Okay, listen, I don't pay that much.
I'm a little checked out these days.
It's all right.
I listen to it.
I don't read it.
That's true. Wait, who reads it? I don't read it. That's true.
Wait, who reads it?
Yeah.
Oh, it's a great,
some British dude.
It's an audio book.
Yeah.
That sounds good.
Yeah.
It's just some great
British actor, right?
Yeah.
He's very,
I'm Harry Potter.
It's good.
That's just how he sounds
when he's being Snape.
Yeah.
Mr. Potter.
Mr. Potter. Mr. Potter.
Rest in peace.
Alright, you guys.
Let's figure out who
Natalie's playing for.
I'm realizing now that this is not
a great poster.
Only, not to insult you,
only because I thought it was L-E,
but I think his name is Eli,
which is not the same.
The poster is to help with the pronunciation.
Oh, is it pronounced Ellie?
Yes.
Your name is Ellie?
It's all been reversed.
Great poster.
It's like Wally, but Ellie.
And there's a little dog in it.
I love it.
It's very good.
Now I think it's good. I don't. It's very good. Yeah, good job.
Now I think it's good.
I don't know why you have those things that football players put under their eyes.
What are those called?
Oh, I thought that was a cinnamon roll.
Eye black?
That's a dog?
It's his dog, yeah.
Eye black.
Sure.
It's cool.
All right.
Ellie.
I'm playing for Ellie.
Kyle?
Well, because it's Shocktober, and so I'm playing for Pete Cemetery.
That's good.
I like it.
I like that.
It's dark.
Kevin?
I'm playing for Elefante Man.
Elefante.
Someone's named Fonte?
No, Ante.
Ante?
His name's Auntie.
Yeah.
I had a whiskey with that dude next door before the show.
I was like, ah, fuck it.
I'll play for you, dude.
It pays to show up a little bit early and have drinks at Franklin & Co.
Because you never know who you're going to sit with.
Yeah, you might meet your auntie.
Those are not good.
Oh, shit.
Okay, so...
These are old cookies.
These are real old
chips ahoy.
Oh, no.
You brought some
fucking dog ass cookies?
You got some
shits ahoy.
Real old chips ahoy.
Yeah, I think they might be expired.
Oh, man.
Did you bring us expired food?
They're from what?
That crafty as shit.
Oh, yeah.
Not so good.
Yeah, they're just sitting on the craft service table.
They weren't a popular item.
Expired 25th of March 2012.
No, I'm just kidding.
It says 18.
But they're still real bad.
Change nothing.
Oh, now I kind of want one.
I had a pumpkin cookie. Your mouth will be so much drier.
I had a cookie that tasted...
Yeah, forget it.
Hey, do you want a disc of dust
in your mouth?
Alright, so...
What do you guys
bring for the prize bag? Let's start with
Ricky. Oh, okay. So I brought
two autographed Garfunkel and Oates CDs
from me and McCooch.
And then this is the bag that they gave us as our prize gift
on the last ever episode of At Midnight.
So you only got this if you were on the show on that night.
So someone gets to have it.
It's lovely.
And we're going to be able to consolidate nicely with that.
Exactly.
Get everything in this big bag.
Natalie. All right, guys. I got some swag for you. get everything in this big bag Natalie
alright guys I got some swag for you
I have
two pillowcases
from the show Crashing
that Doug Benson was on briefly
right? I'm in the next season
you're in the next season? yeah yeah
how exciting
one is white one is black
you can be a real comedy nerd when you have girls come over You're in the next season? Yeah, yeah. How exciting. I am so excited. There's two pillowcases. One is white, one is black.
You could be a real comedy nerd when you have girls come over.
Boy, guys.
Yeah, girls aren't putting that under bed. That's one.
You don't know.
You have to say it like Pete Holmes.
Crashing!
Is that how he says it?
You've got to really lay into it.
Or TJ Miller.
Crashing!
Crashing!
All right, and the second thing is from a dearly
departed show that I was a part of called
The Grinder.
People love that show.
It is a Stunson Grinder
Patagonia vest.
Oh, that is nice.
It's a good swag
because it's an inside joke
and not the name of the show.
Not that this isn't good swag. I'm just saying. This is the kind of swag I prefer is when it's an inside joke and not the name of the show. Not that this isn't good swag.
I'm just saying.
This is the kind of swag I prefer is when it's just an inside joke from the show
and not the name of the show.
You know what I mean?
Right.
Because you could stroll around in the airport and only those in the know are like,
Hey, I see what you're doing there.
Yeah.
Anyway, that's your prize, guys.
Wow.
I don't know why
you wouldn't keep
all of that.
I struggled with it,
but your audience
is important to me
and I wanted them
to have good prizes.
Yeah, you stepped up.
Yeah.
Check out what
this slouch Kyle brought.
Yeah, I didn't give a shit
about the audience.
We have a promotional
Entertainment Weekly
Comic-Con t-shirt
that has Wonder Woman,
thanks one person,
Wonder Woman and Batgirl and Supergirl
really pixelated for some reason.
Got a couple of Blu-rays from my friends
at Shout Factory, including the Zack Snyder
Dawn of the Dead. That's not a shitty movie.
Not at all. But the piece de resistance here
is, this is, I'm sure nobody
has this, this is the debut
novel, Talon of
God, written by
Wesley Snipes.
True question.
Did he write that in prison?
Well, it's Wesley Snipes and Ray Norman,
whoever that is. I'm sure that
dude did most of it.
His name is smaller
on the cover. I have a question.
Can I play to win?
Because I want that.
You want the talent of God?
As Kevin knows,
we have dozens of these
at the SiriusXM.
Cool, will you ship me one?
Swing by.
No problem.
I can give you like 12 of those.
I only want one.
An audio book,
hopefully read by Wesley Schmitz.
Oh, see, then I would listen.
Talent of God.
Yeah, it's great.
I'm going to sign it.
I thought you were going to read from the first chapter.
That would be nice.
No, you can't start reading because you won't stop.
It's that compelling.
Also, that implies that God is what, like a bird?
It's going to pick up people with its talents?
God's a hawk.
Have you not known that?
I did not know.
Wesley Snipes is here to tell you.
I signed it.
I'm free.
So what do you have, Kevin?
I brought a bunch of shit.
You brought a whole bag of shit?
I'll blow through it quickly.
For Halloween, got a From Dusk Till Dawn Japanese
program that I got from seeing it at the
New Beverly.
The new Black Dahlia Murder CD.
Nightbringers. A little death metal
to get people in the mood for Halloween.
Got a
Beetlejuice handbook for the recently
deceased. Nice.
It's a mini version.
A Pumanati poo world order
sticker from a podcast.
A Funko Pop
of a gentleman named
Reaper.
What's he
from? I don't know. A video
game, I think. And then I
got a wolf knife shirt here
from Jason Ellis.
And some Red Dragon stuff. Got a beer pong kit, stickers, shot glass
patches.
Not bad. That's a big grab bag,
you guys.
I feel I don't really bring much name value
to the program.
So I try to overcompensate
with chachis.
This is an amazing couple of bags
that if the winner tonight
misplaces,
they'll be fine.
Hey, this Patagonia vest
is very useful.
It's super nice.
Why don't you wear that?
When are we going to wear this, Doug?
In California?
I really, okay,
I took out the bin of work stuff that this was in, going to wear this, Doug? In California. I really, okay, I took out the bin
of work stuff that this was in,
and I was like, will I ever
wear this? Wait, why do you still
have it? I thought it was in the bag.
It is in the bag. Pass it over here.
Alright.
I thought I had it already, and you just
whipped it out. It was very magical.
Oh, you brought a nice bag. That's pretty.
Purple.
Only the best for this crowd.
Alright, so you got a three bag
at home tonight if you're the winner.
Good luck to
everyone.
We're
running a little behind, so
I'm glad we finally got to this because
I can't imagine. I feel bad
making him wait all this time.
Let's do some lines with Mark.
What's up, LA?
Hey, Mark.
How's it going?
How you guys doing?
You doing good?
Fucking A, you are.
What's up, Doug? Oh, you know, it's good to have you back. It's been a little bit. guys doing? You doing good? What the fuck can I hear you on? What's up, Doug?
Oh, you know, it's good to have you back.
It's been a little bit.
What the fuck can I hear?
What's up?
Natalie, how are you?
Ricky, normal people?
What's up, Doug?
What the fuck?
Are you excited about, you got a movie coming out?
What can I do?
November 10th.
All the money in the world.
Daddy's Home 2. Oh, yeah. That one, too. You got a movie coming out? What can I do? November 10th. All the money in the world. Daddy's Home 2.
Oh, yeah.
That one, too.
You got two movies coming out.
You got a comedy and a drama.
Yeah.
You're like both of the faces of acting.
I'm like a goddamn fucking movie star is what I fucking am, too.
Yeah, versatile.
But right now, I'm just a dude who wants to get out of the fucking house tonight.
It's pumpkin carving night, and Donnie's trying to do all the NKTOB motherfuckers.
He's trying to make pumpkins of all
the new kids? He's trying to carve them out.
He's halfway through his own fucking face and I'm like,
I can't take this. And I stormed out.
Well, I'm glad we gave you somewhere to go
to get away from that madness.
I can go anywhere, dude.
Mark fucking Wahlberg.
Well, okay. Well, I can go anywhere, dude. Mark fucking Wahlberg. Well, okay.
Well, I'm glad you chose us.
So you're going to say a quote from a movie,
a famous movie,
not necessarily a movie that stars Mark Wahlberg.
We went through all of those.
Yeah, well, we can always go back
because they're fucking classics.
That's true.
Yes.
You ever had a douchebag call you R.L. Fine?
No, what's that? You don't like the Goosebumps, dude. R.L. Stine, but they're like a douchebag call you R.L. Fine? No.
What's that?
You don't like the goose bumps, dude.
R.L. Stein, but they're like a douche.
You're like, what's up?
You look like R.L. Fine.
Not yet.
Not till now.
Thanks, Mark. Tell me they do.
I'll punch that motherfucker.
Okay.
Got it.
Got it.
Will you come up with pickup lines that would offend you if you heard them?
Yeah.
Or if you were dating like an over-possessive dude
and on Valentine's Day he called you R.L. Mine.
Oh, yeah.
It'd be over.
I'll fucking punch that dude, too.
I'll let you know.
You want to do some lines?
Yeah, I don't want to do any more R.L. jokes.
I can go all day, dude.
Okay, sorry.
Mark is going to say a line from my movie
And just guess as often as you like
Until somebody gets it right
And they win this game
Do we just shout?
Yeah well you know
You gotta have a microphone
I mean
Just tell it to your microphone
Do I raise my hand?
You just fucking yell it out girl
Just say it
Like as soon as you know it.
All right, Mark.
I'm going to pre-guess.
Elf.
Dude, it was elf.
Oh, shit.
It wasn't fucking elf, bro.
All right, here we go.
Ready?
That was fucking straight up good acting right there.
You fucking believe that shit.
I did.
I don't know why you don't have an Oscar yet.
Don't you fucking do that to me.
Want to know a secret?
Donnie thinks I have three.
And every day I'm like, you can't see them, Donnie.
You're not important enough.
Here we go.
Ready?
Look good. Feel good. You look good Ready? Look good.
Feel good. You look good.
He says this first and then
now the lines.
Okay.
You already cut me too deep.
I'm dying, man.
You already cut me too deep.
I'm dying here, scream it is fucking yeah
wow impressive yeah is it i'm dying man or i'm dying here man which one's right it's i'm dying
here man okay well you got into it the first time yeah so well you gotta fucking go into it a little
bit i almost said romeo and juliet till you said man go into it a little bit. I almost said Romeo and Juliet until you said man.
I thought it was
that Mercutio laugh.
Oh,
yeah,
but it was
but a prick.
Yeah.
It was but a prick.
No,
the one where it's like
twill serve.
Is that the same one?
Yeah,
same fucking one.
Oh,
right.
Thanks,
Mark.
Two bull fucking
takes him out.
Yeah,
that's it.
I know my shit.
Got it.
I'm gonna go
break down
these pumpkins.
All right,
thank you,
Mark Wahlberg,
everybody.
That was spectacular.
Wow.
So, so great.
The star of his caliber comes by to do that.
You know a lot of famous people, Doug.
Yeah.
It's going all right.
All right. All right, so I think we're all right time-wise.
I always get so confused when we start late,
and I don't want to hold up the next show.
So let's play a game that's going to determine our winner tonight,
and it's called Ron Bennington's Adjusted for Inflation Bureau game.
Oh.
Everybody loves it.
They don't know to tell their hands to clap about it.
But in their heads, they love it.
Some of them tell their hands to clap
when it's way too late.
Okay.
when it's way too late.
Oh my God,
I was at a thing last night that Ricky almost went to,
but then she didn't.
I did?
Yeah, there was a loud
laugher, clapper guy
that was really annoying.
And then way before it was over,
he got up and left.
I was just like,
what kind of miracle?
Yeah, and if he was that into it, was he just trying to get get all out like all those reactions in the first half so yeah i'll just laugh
way too hard at everything in case something funny happens after i leave it was really weird
he probably had to give and then he was gone it was unsettling was it good yeah yeah it was i might as well say what it was now was egger right uh showed uh clips from
uh like movies that use music in a way that inspired him to do the kinds of movies that
he does today and like uh talked about all the clips and i wish i could have seen that you know
2001 goodfellas all the usual suspects any musicals or no? the usual suspects?
yes
a Busby Berkeley musical
called Dames
nice
yeah
it was a really weird
weird clip he showed from that
a lot of Ruby Keeler face
like all the dancers
had to carry big
Ruby Keeler faces
oh yeah
it's on that like
staircase and they move
the masks.
Oh, yeah.
That's a good one.
Oh, Ricky.
Oh, I know.
We both love musicals.
I know.
Damn.
The rest of the panel, not so much.
Yeah, I have no idea what I wrote.
Doug, we can do a podcast about it.
Oh.
Doug loves musicals?
Mm-hmm.
You're lucky I didn't make you play that game.
I'm going to name...
Kyle gets to go first in the first round
Since he won that last thing
And then we'll go to
Natalie, Ricky, and Kevin
And
I'm going to name an actor and actress
And each of you gets a chance to weigh in
And guess
What movie might be
In their top three grossing pictures
of their careers
according to Box Office Mojo
after being adjusted for inflation.
Always gets a laugh
when I, is it just because I get through the whole thing
without fucking it up too bad?
I think they find the word inflation funny.
Yeah, it is funny.
Unnecessary also.
Because it stopped. There's no more inflation. I heard the president told me that
today.
Economy's perfect. Everyone's
doing great.
Alright.
Kyle,
start off with a tough one, I'm afraid.
And you get three points if you get the number one movie
and two points for two and one point for three
and no points for anything after that.
Kyle, the films of Selena Gomez.
What a great oeuvre she has.
Yeah.
Not too many to choose from.
Yeah, there's four of us.
Yeah, she's got more than four movies.
Oh, do we all have to pick a Selena Gomez movie?
You'll have to pick a different one,
but in order.
Fuck.
Or you could pass,
starting with Kyle.
What do you think
Selena Gomez
has enough movies
to have a top three
shit
how can you
how can you go back
to EW radio
I mean I know
without naming
a Selena Gomez film
yeah without
naming one
there was you know there was that one where she was like oh that one sucked without naming a Selena Gomez film. Yeah, without naming one.
You know, there was that one where she was like,
Oh, that one sucked.
Well, there's that one...
Ah, fuck me.
I love this. If all four of you don't know it,
I probably will give you all points.
I'm going to say,
and I can't even imagine this movie made very much money,
but it's the only one that I can think of at the moment.
I'm going to say Spring Breakers.
Yeah.
That's the one that pops into everybody's brain.
Yeah.
Certainly very memorable.
Natalie, do you have one?
Fuck, that was the one I had.
That's the one?
All right, Ricky?
I'm going to need a mom.
I'm going to maybe guess she was in one of those
Gary Marshall movies.
Oh.
There's every star in those.
I wish that's what they were called. One of those Gary Marshall movies. There's every star in those. I wish that's what they were called.
One of those Gary Marshalls.
That's what he called them.
I'm going to say she was in Mother's Day.
Okay.
And that was her highest grossing film.
Okay.
Might be up there.
It could happen.
This could be a resounding no.
But was she in Spy Kids?
Probably.
We've got to have the exact title.
Spy Kids.
Kevin?
Sure.
Sure.
I think she was in Hotel Transylvania.
Okay.
All right.
That animated thing with Adam Sandler.
That's your final guess?
Yeah.
Okay.
Here we go.
Coming in at number one, Dr. Seuss' Horton Hears a Who.
All right.
Number two, Hotel Transylvania.
Hey.
Two.
Oh.
Oh.
You got robbed
Fuck me
Twist
Number three
Spy Kids
3D
Game Over
Oh
You're so close
So close
Oh
I didn't say 3D
Game Over
Yeah
That's a
Those longer titles
With the colons and shit
They're tough So she was not in Mother's
Day? Oh, you know what?
It's not in her top three, I'll tell you that much.
But I also
I saw Mother's Day and I don't recall
seeing her. I'm surprised Hotel
Transylvania 2 made more money than
Hotel Transylvania.
She's in both? I would imagine
so. Okay.
Next round.
We'll start with you this time, Natalie,
and then we go to Ricky and Kevin and Kyle.
Top three for the great, the lovable Mr. Andy Samberg.
Ooh, shit.
Can I think out loud without saying an answer?
I don't...
I can't answer that for you.
I mean, will you take the first thing I say as my answer
if I don't say the final answer?
No, you can walk through it.
I don't think Popstar made that much money.
But I don't think you want to give away to other people
potential answers.
Damn it.
I guess I have to say fucking Popstar now.
What's that full title?
Oh, no.
Popstar.
Never stop, never stopping.
Thank you.
It's Popstar
Never Stop, Never Stopping.
So much.
Yes, yes.
Ricky?
Do I have to go right now
because I can't think of it.
I know he was in a movie
with Adam Sandler.
I feel like it was called
oh yeah that one
something
oh that was the Mark Wahlberg
oh I don't know what that was
I'm going to guess another thing he did a cameo
in that he may or may not have been in
what's a successful comedy movie of the last year?
He was probably in it.
Oh, yeah.
I bet you he's in Zoolander 2.
Well, no, because that didn't make that much money either, did it?
You also know that I know the answers, right?
God damn it!
Okay, what's a movie that came out last year?
What's a comedy?
I don't think he was in the mom, bad moms.
That's the only comedy I can think of in the last year.
I'm not kidding.
Let's go with bad moms.
Okay, bad moms.
Okay.
I know he wasn't in it, but I'm going to go with it.
Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs.
Oh, that's interesting.
The animated shit, man.
Kevin with the animated movies.
Don't judge me.
I haven't seen a lot of them.
I know that it wasn't that successful,
but I know that all those Adam Sandler movies make money.
So I'm going to say That's My Boy.
Ah, that was it.
That's what everybody was thinking of.
That's My Boy.
All right.
Coming in at number three in Andy Steinberg's top three.
Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs.
No way, pops, our main one.
I'm just waiting for the two.
Coming in at number two,
Hotel Transylvania.
And then coming in at number one,
Hotel Transylvania 2.
All right, now no more audience. God fucking Christ. And then coming in at number one. Hotel Transylvania 2. Hotel Transylvania 2. Yes!
All right.
Now, no more audience trying to help,
because this is going to get intense.
Well, they did give me the wrong answer, to be fair.
Yeah.
So we'll start with Natalie.
I mean, Ricky.
OK.
Yeah, Ricky.
Give us something that's in the top three of David Spade.
Oh, probably Tommy Boy.
Okay, Kevin.
Is he not in that?
Yeah, he's in it.
Kevin?
You just made a face like he wasn't in it.
Okay.
I didn't make a face.
Oh, now I know what it is.
It's just my face.
God damn it.
Sorry, Greg. Is it perhaps Hotel Transylvania 2? I don't know. Make a face. Oh, now I know what it is. It's just my face. God damn it. Sorry.
Is it perhaps Hotel Transylvania 2?
Did you say David Spade?
Damn, I didn't catch on.
I just worked to lose.
I mean, at this point, do I have any choice but to go with Hotel Transylvania?
Prime?
I don't know.
You got options.
Do I?
Natalie? Real quick, is this
Top Girl seeing of all time?
Yeah, after Adjusted for Inflation.
I'm going to say Joe Dirt.
Okay.
They made a Joe Dirt too.
He's the titular Joe Dirt.
That's what I thought. I'm doubting myself here.
Yeah, it spawned a sequel straight to Crackle.
Oh, boy.
All right, coming in at number three.
I love David Spade, by the way.
I love all these people.
Number three is Hotel Transylvania 2.
Oh!
That's a point for Kevin.
And then the number two David Spade movie is Grown Ups.
That was my second guess.
And number one,
the Rugrats movie.
What?
All right.
This is pretty exciting.
Kevin gets to start this final round.
If there's a tie, we'll have a tiebreaker.
Is this game one to zero to zero to zero?
Kevin has two and everyone else is playing.
Okay.
Everyone else gets participant trophies.
Hotel Transylvania.
Kevin Kraft.
Kevin James.
Who's that?
Oh my god.
He's the guy that's popular enough to have his TV wife murdered.
He was that guy that killed it in Hotel Transylvania 2.
Oh, is that your answer?
Ah, fuck it. Sure.
Kyle?
Oh no!
I gotta go grown-ups.
Okay.
Natalie?
Paul Blart.
Mall Cop.
Ricky?
I'm going to go with Hitch.
That got an applause break.
All right.
Coming in at number three, Paul Blart Mall Cop.
Natalie gets a point.
Coming in at number two, Grown Ups.
Point for Kyle.
And coming in at number one, Hitch.
Did I just win?
Ricky just took it down. Sorry, man.
Three points.
Thank you, Hitch.
I did not see that coming.
Thank you.
Thank you, Will Smith.
Yeah, great job.
Thank you.
That was awesome.
Where's Justin?
Come get your prizes, Justin.
You got to carry these three bags out of here.
Yeah, Justin. Congratulations, Justin. You've got to carry these three bags out of here. Yeah, Justin.
Congratulations, dude.
Was that...
Oh, there you go.
If you could do me a favor and spread all that out
on the floor and take a picture of all of it
and then I need
someone to masturbate to if you could
send that along.
I'd appreciate it.
Send that Patagonia vest.
Oh, it looks so soft.
What a creep.
So, Ricky, you won.
So you go first.
What do you got to plug?
What's coming up?
What can we look for you in?
Another period, season two
and nothing else.
And my podcast with Doug
about musicals.
Yeah. Do you have a show? and nothing else. And my podcast with Doug about musicals.
Yeah.
Do you have a show?
Scarf a little note,
do you have a show coming up?
Not really, no.
Just kind of nothing.
Yeah.
No tour dates or anything?
Nothing, no.
What are you waiting for?
I took the summer off.
Listen.
You know what time of year it is right now, right?
I know, I know. Sounds like you're taking now off as well. I know. I meant to just take right now, right? I know. I know. It sounds like you're taking now off as well.
I know.
I meant to just take that.
Listen, I don't know.
I decided to try to get a life.
It was, it's been boring.
I'm ready to not have one again.
I'll just put it out there.
We can watch movies.
Yeah, there we go.
Then I'll have a life.
Yeah.
Do I go next, Doug?
Yes, please.
Well, there's a movie that I apparently star in called Battle of the Sexes.
Yes!
That's playing in theaters right now,
right down the street at the Arclight.
You can check it out.
It starts Emma Stone, Steve Carell,
Sarah Silverman, Alan Cumming.
Everybody's great.
Myself.
From the directors of Little Miss Sunshine.
Yeah.
And it's a real interesting slice of history,
but it's also fun and funny,
but also super great to watch right now
with all this shit happening to women.
It's nice to see a very positive lady story
that's way ahead of its time.
A positive lady story.
Yeah.
That's the tagline.
Working time.
Ahead of its time like you know
like there's not even
a woman taking on a man
and some stupid thing
like that
well is there any
other sport where women
get pay
parody
like tennis
no
modeling
yeah they made it happen
the sport of modeling
porn
yeah women do make
more important
that's a great point do they really than the men oh yeah Sport of modeling. Porn. Yeah, women do make more in porn.
That's a great point, Ricky.
Do they really?
The men are just like, oh, I'm going to get... But there's more women than there are men, I think, right?
So the men get paid more?
No, the women get paid more.
Really?
Yeah, the men just get a sandwich.
Yeah.
The men are happy to be there.
I guess that's true.
Yeah, those ladies are attractive.
Yep, I guess that's true. Pretty sweet gig ladies are attractive. Yep, I guess that's true.
Pretty sweet gig.
How much porn did you do background in, Doug?
Teen Wolf 3?
I did hold a boom mic over some porn activity,
and it's weird.
It's very weird.
He was in Teen Wolf?
Yeah. weird he was in he was in peen wolf yeah my early days of living in Los Angeles I
would do I would be like a PA on porn film so I usually just had to set up the
crew to pay for the for the performers but every once a while they'd be like, here, hold this boom mic over these people who are 69ing.
And I'd be like,
oh, the valley.
What a crazy place.
Kyle?
My show is called...
Mr. Anderson. Yes, sir.
It's called Up All Afternoon.
It's every weekdays
four in the east, one here in the west. Entertainment Weekly Radio, Sirius XM 105. It's called Up All Afternoon. It's every weekdays, four in the east, one here in the west.
Entertainment Weekly Radio, Sirius XM
105. It's me
talking to people about pop culture
stuff. It's a fun show. Yeah, we gotta find a show
for me to recap with you every week.
I can't wait. Is there anything
outside of the deuce? Is there anything you've been watching
yet, Doug?
Yeah.
Have you been watching Mindhunter on Netflix?
I have trouble.
I'll start a Netflix show, and I'll watch one episode,
then I'll start another one, and it just keeps going,
and then I lose interest in all of them.
Okay.
I watched the first episode of American Vandal.
I watched that whole thing.
I liked it.
Yeah?
I did.
It gets better.
Oh, okay.
Because the first episode seemed very clever to me, but it also seemed like, this is a
whole series of this?
Yeah, there is.
It's funny.
Okay.
They end up switching it up, though.
It's not 10 episodes.
They're better.
I mean, I liked the first episode, but it just felt pretty self-contained.
I was kind of surprised when it had a cliffhanger ending.
I was like, oh, I thought this was going to be a different story every week.
I thought it was more anthology style.
No.
But that's TV.
That's not movies.
True.
Yeah, so don't you dare
bring it up ever again.
Even though it was me
that brought it up.
I want to watch that
Meyerowitz stories on Netflix.
Oh, yeah, and the Noah Baumbach movie.
I like Noah Baumbach
and Ben Stiller
and Adam Sandler
and Dustin Hoffman.
Seem like perfect to be all related to each other.
So I'm into it.
Kevin Craft.
Jason Ellis show.
Yeah, the Jason Ellis show on SiriusXM
channel 103.
Noon to 3pm
Pacific. And then the math
for Eastern.
And I also do a podcast called...
Now look, if you're torn between Kyle and Kevin during the day,
because there is some overlap,
both of their shows are available on demand.
That is true.
On the SiriusXM app.
It's a good app.
Yeah.
It is a good app.
And I also have a podcast called Mad Scientist Party Hour
on the Riotcast Network.
What happens on that show?
Eating edibles, telling poop jokes, embarrassing stories from our lives that sometimes involve poop.
General, run-of-the-mill stuff.
Yeah, it sounds like the heavy emphasis on poop.
It sounds like the heavy emphasis on poop.
And I just came from doing a show before this one that's called Stone Science,
which is you do science stuff while high.
Oh, I get it.
Yeah.
I don't know if it counts as science, but we tried to put ants into an ant farm.
That's science.
And it did not go well.
Did you get bit?
Bit?
By the ants.
No, the trouble was they were ants
that were too small
for an ant farm.
You need to get more
of those hardy ants.
Like these ants were like,
fuck this ant farm.
They can have our cookies.
Oh, no.
Do you think ants
have a little bit of sadness
when something sugary is also stale?
Or do you think they just go right through it
as if it's nobody's biz?
No, they feel sadness ten times their weight.
Yeah.
That's right.
Phoenix, Doug Lowe's movie is going to be a stand-up live
on October 28th at 420.
And this was a lot of fun.
Thank you for being here, audience.
And thank you to my guests,
Ricky Lindholm, Natalie Morales,
Kyle Anderson, Kevin Kraft.
As always,
I don't know what order to read these in.
People who go to Portland
instead of seeing Douglas movies
are a shithead.
So that just sounds like
some sort of personal shit.
I don't know where this came from.
Maybe there's something new in the news I haven't caught up with.
Sweden is a shithead?
This person's just tired of neutral countries?
And then this is a strong finish.
Nazis are a shit.