Doug Loves Movies - Paul F. Tompkins, Jimmy Pardo, and Kate Micucci Guest

Episode Date: May 14, 2010

In the Season 2 finale of I Love Movies, Doug welcomes Paul F. Tompkins, Jimmy Pardo, and Kate Micucci to compete in the first round of the Leonard Maltin Tournament of Champions.See Privacy ...Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming babies, sticky seeds with 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth. There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug loves movies! Hey everybody! Hey! Hey and hello. Hey and hello As always I'm not entirely prepared For my opening remarks But now I am
Starting point is 00:00:32 My name is Doug Benson And I love Movies I try to be dramatic like This is American Idol But I couldn't pull it off. Alright, we're coming to you live on tape from the UCB Theater in Los Angeles. As always, preceding
Starting point is 00:00:53 Comedy Death Ray, it's Tuesday May 11th, 2010. And since this is episode 50, I think this is a good time to quit. And start a new season next week so um starting next week the show is going to have a new name we're going to change the name of the
Starting point is 00:01:13 movie to of the show to uh doug loves movies because my name is doug and i love movies i don't know why i call it i love moviesies, because if you Google I Love Movies, the first thing that comes up is some sort of porn thing about somebody who loves porn movies. And I just love all movies, porn or otherwise. So next week it'll be called Doug Loves Movies. That's an exciting change for everybody to look forward to. And remember Larry Zerner, the guy who was on the podcast and he stars as Shelly in Friday the 13th 3D? Yeah, yeah. A little smattering of applause for Larry.
Starting point is 00:01:52 He's dead now. And so we're going to all go dance on his grave. No, he and I are going to re-team to do a live commentary of that movie, Friday the 13th 3D. We're showing it in 2D, but believe me, the 3D wasn't that amazing to begin with. And it's going to be at the Cinefamily Theater in Los Angeles on Fairfax Avenue near Melrose. And it's going to be on May 24th. So Google that shit to figure out how to get tickets or follow me on Twitter. I'm sure I'll put a link on there.
Starting point is 00:02:27 All right, since this is the season finale, I decided to have some of the best Leonard Maltin game players on here to have a tournament of champions that will continue in the next week's show as well. So please welcome three people who have done very well at this game in the past. Kate McHugh, Jimmy Pardo, and Paul F. Tompkins. I didn't write all your names down
Starting point is 00:03:00 on here, so I almost blanked and forgot who I was just talking to backstage a few minutes ago. Check. Look at your notes. It's like you're the guy from Seven. Arkrum's brother is what
Starting point is 00:03:14 my show looks like on paper. Did you swallow that string yet? To cleanse yourself? Not that brother. I loved it. I always forget it's two different weirdos yeah that weirdo is a weirdo related to two weirdos right um so let's uh get right into it you guys okay last night at largo i had a preliminary competition between uh dana gould and jerry o'connell and j Jerry won that showdown.
Starting point is 00:03:46 So someday one of you will have to face him in the ultimate showdown. Next week I'm going to have three more competitors. Let's not say who they're going to be. I wish you told me this after, Doug. I know this is a lot of pressure on a man who just got married. Congratulations, Paul and Tom. Oh, thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:04:11 Yeah, put the microphone in the audience direction to get all that audience applause. You don't want to miss any of that audience applause. I thought I would get some extra applause, but then this gooseneck microphone went crazy on me. The old gooseneck. All right. Let's talk about movies.
Starting point is 00:04:28 Baby. Let's talk about you and me. All the things I'm... Finally, somebody made hip-hop of Roaring Twenties. Let's talk about sex, baby. Take it easy, love.
Starting point is 00:04:44 You and me. Someone's talk about sex, baby. Let's talk about you and me. Someone's getting a megaphone for Christmas. Yes. Oh my God, that could be a new Christmas classic. Someone's getting a megaphone for Christmas. Somebody's getting a megaphone for Christmas. Get ready to
Starting point is 00:05:02 shout out the Roaring Twenties. I like that you went ballad style rather than the sort of novelty. No, I went ballad. I love that time of the season. That's no time for joking. Yeah, let's not forget the reason for the season. Right? A guy died.
Starting point is 00:05:18 Wrong. Guy was born. Heads up. You know what? I bet you somebody died that day. That's right. We're also celebrating everybody who died on September. Nobody. September 21st.
Starting point is 00:05:29 Never forget. September 25th. Never forget as well. When all those people died. You don't know what happened on the 25th. Some survivors didn't make it. So people held on
Starting point is 00:05:39 for a couple of weeks. We finally had to say goodbye to them. You put up a good fight Went down 200 flights of stairs But now it's time to say goodbye I haven't been listening for over a minute Kate McHugh, you just came back from First of all, you are I should clear up for anybody who's confused
Starting point is 00:06:03 Maybe, listeners That you are half of Garfun up for anybody who's confused, maybe, listeners, that you are half of Garfunkel and Oates and have appeared with Ricky Lindholm on this show and have done very well at the Leonard Moulton game. You're a Leonard Moulton savant. I don't know how that's possible, but I guess every time I just luck out in knowing the answer. I don't know if it's going to happen tonight. Your false modesty sickens me. What a joy.
Starting point is 00:06:34 And so you just came back from New York where you were shooting a few episodes of Bored to Death, the Zach Galifianakis program on, that's what I call it. There's some other guys that lead, but to me it's the Zach Galifianakis program on That's what I call it There's some other guys to lead But to me it's the Zach Galifianakis program On HBO And did you see a motion picture on the plane On the way back?
Starting point is 00:06:53 I always like to talk to people about what they saw on planes You know It was unfortunate because the whole system was broken And no one was watching anything for the whole season I got a free flight because of that No really? When that happened I was like what do you mean no movie? And six hours. I got a free flight because of that. No, really? When that happened. I was like, what do you mean no movie?
Starting point is 00:07:06 And they're like, just take this free flight coupon. What? Wait, free flight, not a free beverage? It was on United, where I am in the Freaking Fire program, and I've reached king level. I'm a king. So every time I get on the plane, it's mine to run. And when the movies don't work, I really bitch.
Starting point is 00:07:28 So what'd you do? Read a book or some shit? Well, I... Read a book or some shit. Into the microphone, please, Mr. Pardo. Yeah, read a book or some shit. What'd you do? Draw on a cave wall? What'd you do? What'd you do? Sit alone with your thoughts?
Starting point is 00:07:45 What'd you do? Holy crap. I can Sit alone with your thoughts? What'd you do? Holy crap. I can't sit alone with my thoughts and no armrests. Like, if you're in a middle seat, there better be a fucking movie. That's all I have to say. Wait, somebody that's a king should never be in the middle seat. I don't care if it's a squeak wool. I want a movie on the plane.
Starting point is 00:08:01 So what'd you do? Well, I was reading Sarah's book, and then I fell asleep. The Bedwetter! Yes. Available in bookstores. Oh, I thought it was going rogue. It's an amazing book. It's so good.
Starting point is 00:08:13 But I was really tired and fell asleep for about five hours. But then at one point, somebody tapped me. Great review for that book. For a six-hour flight. I know, I was really... Isn't it great when you fall asleep
Starting point is 00:08:25 for the whole flight almost, though? It really is. It's a really nice feeling. But at one point, somebody tapped me on the shoulder and they said, do you want a hot dog? And I said...
Starting point is 00:08:36 He doesn't serve hot dogs on planes. What the hell? It was a hot dog. Was it a Serbian robot? Do you want a hot dog? And so I woke up and I ate maybe a quarter of a hot dog, and then I fell back asleep. What are you talking about?
Starting point is 00:08:55 What are you, Shea Airlines? I don't understand. Who serves hot dogs? Hot dog now, hot dog. Guy walking up and down the aisle. Popcorn now, hot dog. Peanuts here. Who needs them them who needs two
Starting point is 00:09:06 hot dog now it's so much easier to throw the stuff though because it's a small tube yeah what I have to ask you now what airline was this
Starting point is 00:09:14 this was continental oh so continental they tried to make the hot dog fancy though because they didn't call it a bun they called it
Starting point is 00:09:23 dough what yeah but they still call it a hot dog a hot dog and dough yeah that sounds horrible i think this was part of your being asleep you mean a bagel dog this was a dream no i'm pretty sure and then we landed at my old high school. Then my mom was my dad. Nah, what up, hot dog? Have you been to the movies lately, Jimmy? I went this afternoon, Douglas.
Starting point is 00:09:53 I went over to the Arclight. I was in the dome. I sat comfortably in my own row and section. Not very crowded this afternoon is my point. One time I went to the dome and I was sitting with a friend. But we were in that front row of the kind of upper balcony thing, which is kind of cool. That's nice. You might be able to put your feet up or whatever.
Starting point is 00:10:11 And the place was empty. The lady comes with her friend. Oh, no fucking way. They sit right next to me. No, move. Right next to me. That's so weird. They sit right next to me.
Starting point is 00:10:20 And I kind of make a face and move over. See, she goes, what's your problem? This is a movie theater. Like, all right, well, you've managed to say the one thing that puts me in a position to not be able to argue with you. You're right. It is a
Starting point is 00:10:36 movie theater where weirdos sit way too close to people for no fucking reason. She was saying, like, this is a movie theater. What do you expect to happen? People are, of course, going to sit right next to you when there's millions of other seats. That's what I think was strange about that lady. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:54 Now, I had a question that I forgot for Kate. Oh, yes. Hopefully it'll come back. Oh, we're going all the way back to Kate now? Because Jimmy really ran with the... Oh, no, I had a question for Jimmy. I was asking a question, and I gave you, and I did not tell you what movie I was going to do. I really saw a movie. Can we guess? Did you see... Well, I know what movie I wanted to do. I really saw a movie. Can we guess?
Starting point is 00:11:06 Did you see... Well, I know what movie is at the Dome currently. You were there today? I was there this afternoon, yes, sir. You saw Iron Man 2? I saw Iron Man 2.
Starting point is 00:11:12 Were you in the company of your son, Olivier? No, I went solo. And his name is Oliver. I was in honor of Continental Airlines. I was pronouncing it with a bit of a flair.
Starting point is 00:11:22 No, Oliver cannot go see Iron Man 2. That's not appropriate for a child. What? You see that movie? It's made out of comical books. It was boring. A two and a half year old would be bored if his daddy was. Well, I
Starting point is 00:11:35 thought that movie needed more of Scarlett Johansson fighting and less of Mickey Rourke not fighting. Like, Mickey Rourke sitting around was never interesting. Oh, look, he's building something. Who gives a shit? Show up with your thing built.
Starting point is 00:11:52 We don't need a montage. The opening credits is a montage of a guy welding stuff together. Right, but he's got those little reading glasses on the tip of his nose. I liked it every time he put them on. Go fuck yourself! It's like student films where they show you the doorknob turning. It's like, how do we know that he got in there?
Starting point is 00:12:12 How do we know anything about this guy unless we see the license plate on his car? That is another one that drives me crazy. Like when they do character development on the license plate. What bugs me about... I haven't seen Iron Man 2 and I probably won't because I hate when they do character development On the license plate What bugs me about I haven't seen Iron Man 2 and I probably won't
Starting point is 00:12:27 Because I hate when they make I enjoy the big blockbuster action movies As much as the next person But when they make the sequel And it's particularly with comic book movies They feel this need to like jam A million other things in the sequel Like how about add one thing
Starting point is 00:12:43 You can add one thing. You might as well have to be like every fucking thing they can think of. Remember when Sam Jackson showed up at the end of the first one after the credits and said you should join the Avengers? He spends the rest of this new one trying to get him to join the Avengers.
Starting point is 00:13:00 Guess what happens by the end of the movie? He hasn't joined the Avengers. How fucking long are they going to drag it out We know he becomes one It's in the bible That is comic books It's so weird It's so like you're saying
Starting point is 00:13:15 They have all these extra characters And that's why Scarlett Johansson isn't in it enough If you ask me Because there's too much else going on I think I read you Loud and clear So you haven't seen Iron Man What have you seen because there's too much else going on. I think I read you. Loud and clear. So you haven't seen Iron Man.
Starting point is 00:13:29 What have you seen? Make yourself useful. Wow. On my honeymoon, there was one night that we... You went to the movies on your honeymoon? No, I did not go to the movies, but I saw a movie. Oh, okay. We would have a happy hour in the hotel room where we would have uh we would have wine at like uh you know earlier and earlier every day
Starting point is 00:13:52 and then um one day happy hour started awful early and um we were ready there was one night where we slept we like took a nap at 4 and woke up at 10 the next morning. That was fucking awesome. There was a moment where I woke up at 1am and I was like, oh no, this is going to be terrible. I was instantly asleep again. Then I woke up and it was the next day. It was fantastic. But one night we were like,
Starting point is 00:14:18 Hawaii, come here and sleep. Yeah, well, it was great. We were in the sun all day and then we got back to the room We had a couple glasses of wine We're like We're not going anywhere tonight Yeah And so we watched
Starting point is 00:14:29 What movie? We like I'm getting He's driving Jimmy crazy Oh my god We saw a little movie Which was mentioned The last time I did your podcast Doug
Starting point is 00:14:37 Oh yeah? Did you hear about The Morgan Okay you did I saw it on a plane Right after that And Jon Hamm Is a lying stack of shit. He's wrong.
Starting point is 00:14:46 Because that movie is fucking worthless. Even as a Hugh Grant vehicle, it's one of the worst. I texted him from my honeymoon after watching this movie like, did you say this movie was kind of okay? It was like, it was so crazy it's like a collection of scenes that you would see in a movie if a movie was playing on tv in a movie do you know what i mean it's like if two characters are watching like a bad movie on tv and then somebody came in and interrupted them and then the action started this is like the movie that would still be playing if the camera never followed the actors
Starting point is 00:15:28 and just stayed on the television. It was crazy. It was crazily awful. Then I saw, on the plane back from Hawaii, the movie was Leap Year with Amy Adams, romantic comedy, which I watched with the sound down and I was able to completely follow from start to finish. I would lean over to Janie, my wife, and I would just tell her
Starting point is 00:15:51 okay, now she's going to marry this asshole, but she doesn't realize he's an asshole yet. He's like a real type A business dude and then later he will feel himself to be a shit. And then it's like everything played out exactly. And then I realized there's the long arid stretch in a romantic comedy Like that like in the tradition of
Starting point is 00:16:07 It happened one night where the two people That are not supposed to fall in love You gotta wait and wait And wait for them They so don't get along Oh my god it takes forever They are like the opposites It takes forever
Starting point is 00:16:22 When you know what is going to happen It's horrible. Those are the last two movies that I saw. I've been to the cinema recently and I saw... Forgive me for not asking you. How rude. Some documentaries that are very good
Starting point is 00:16:38 that I'd like to recommend. You see The Gift Shop? I saw Exit Through The Gift Shop. Did you love it? Was that an Amami movie? Yeah. Exit Through the Gift Shop. Terrific. Did you love it? So good. You saw that too? Yeah. Did you see that? I did bring Oliver for that. Was that in a mommy movie? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:48 Oh, he loves it. My son loves the documentary. Really? Yeah, we saw Oceans and I say, you want to stick around and watch this? What if at the end
Starting point is 00:16:54 of that your son turned to you and said, Dad, I'm Banksy? I would say, how do you do it? Well, because first of all it would have been I'm Banksy.
Starting point is 00:17:04 It would have been garbled. But anyway, Banksy's the guy who, in England, I guess, he was a big street artist who would paste things on the wall instead of spraying them on there, or use stencils and all sorts of this stuff. And it's a really interesting documentary. It's terrific. It's one of those documentaries where you don't want to say too much about it because it's interesting how twisty it is for a
Starting point is 00:17:31 documentary. Is it based on a true story? Uh-huh. Yes, it is. It's based on this weird Frenchman who filmed a lot of stuff. That may be the funniest thing you've ever said. It's not. Oh, it is.
Starting point is 00:17:47 Jimmy. Oh, it is. I don't know. Kate, what do you think? We both think it's not. I think it is. I don't think it is. Thank you, Kate.
Starting point is 00:17:55 You're welcome. Thank you. But Jimmy likes the underdog when it comes to humor. He likes the jokes that aren't really the best ones. I do. And I was sent a copy of a thing called Best Worst Movie. Have you guys heard about this? No. Wait, say it again.
Starting point is 00:18:11 It's all about, have you seen Troll 2? Troll 2 is amazingly awful and there's a documentary made by the little boy in Troll 2 like a little 8 year old, 10-year-old actor, he grew up to make a documentary about how this movie has become the best, worst movie of all time. So it's like Troll probably was not that great to begin with.
Starting point is 00:18:36 Right, but Troll 2 is amazing because they got this Italian guy to direct his script Goblin, and they didn't bother to put any trolls in the movie. It's a movie about goblins. But it's called Troll 2. And it's just amazingly horrible movie. You're saying that as if people are watching the movie saying,
Starting point is 00:18:56 wait a minute, that's a goblin! Because all the dialogue tells them that. It's not like the audience members have to figure it out. They just sit there going, there is no mention of trolls. No one is saying anything about trolls. Nobody's being asked questions before walking across a bridge.
Starting point is 00:19:16 No one's sitting on top of a pencil with their crazy hair. That may be the funniest thing you've ever said. Maybe. Maybe. It. Maybe. Maybe. It might be. We'll have to do some research. That one is possible.
Starting point is 00:19:29 Wait, what's the name of that documentary, Doug? It's called Best Worst Movie. Best Worst Movie. And it's playing at the East Village Theater in New York City right now. Not going to see it then. And it's going to be at the New Art starting next Friday, next week. And then it's going to be opening all over, so look for it is what I'm trying to say. I'm sending a note
Starting point is 00:19:46 to myself right now. Oh, all right. Will you send it to me as well? Best worst movie. Yeah, well, I'll CC you on this. Forward that.
Starting point is 00:19:52 CC me on that note. Hey, and blind copy me on that. I don't want Jimmy to know I was involved. Kate, you want in on this? Sure. Kate wants in as well, please. Have you been to a mommy movie
Starting point is 00:20:02 at all lately? Because I was obsessed when you used to go to mommy movies. My son's gotten too old to go to the mommy movies Once they can speak and run around they don't want them there Because I was in a theater the other day In Dallas, Texas when I saw Exit
Starting point is 00:20:12 Through the gift shop And they had a sign for their mommy movies Where they said We don't turn the lights down We don't Turn the sound up too loud So those are already great conditions to watch a movie Guess what we add
Starting point is 00:20:29 Screaming babies So the sound's down a little bit so they don't scream But they're gonna anyway Nah they really don't They say there's a changing table in the room Sure go change that baby You don't want to miss a second of that movie You want to smell other shit babies
Starting point is 00:20:44 You'd rather him be changed want to miss a second of that movie. You want to smell other shit babies? You'd rather him be changed. Let me shut up for a second. Just relax. If you change the child, it'll be less smell than if you let him sit in his own shit. You know what? That's the number one rule in parenting. Change the child instead of letting him sit in his own shit.
Starting point is 00:21:07 By the way, most of the movies that are mommy movie are movies that you don't care if a kid is screaming. Yeah, it's like a movie. It's Leap Year. It's The Morgans. It's crap. So you're really taking your child to a different location for screaming purposes. That's it. It's just to get out of the house. Let's go do a group scream.
Starting point is 00:21:18 Let's take the kid somewhere where other kids will be screaming. And scream therapy. Do you have to have a baby to get into the mommy movies? You do not. In fact, there's been people sometimes where they come in and they're explained to it. Like, you know, this is a baby movie. And they're like, yeah, that's okay. Really?
Starting point is 00:21:33 Yeah, that's creepy. Just me and my raincoat. Just me and my coat. Me, my raincoat, my newspaper. We're all set. We're all set. No baby on me. See my car with the
Starting point is 00:21:47 no baby on board sign? Exhausted. It's time, I think, for the Leonard Maltin tourney of championships. Holy macaroni. There we go. The tourney of championships, I just said. The tourney of champions.
Starting point is 00:22:10 I hope you guys are ready for this because it's going to be intense. I hope so too, Doug. We're going to start down there on the other end with Kate. Okay. We haven't heard from her much. I know. Maybe you'll catch a break, Kate,
Starting point is 00:22:20 and you'll answer one correctly. I don't know. Member before audience. Okay, okay. I don't think they did. It didn't seem like they did. They can't hear me, right? No.
Starting point is 00:22:37 Nice fill. Well, I get this thing going. Seems unfair. Sometimes the app takes a little while to... Alright, you guys are going to be very excited about this category. Okay. It's...
Starting point is 00:22:48 Champion movies? No. Tournament movies? It's future guest John Lithgow movies. Future guest John Lithgow movies? Yes. I nailed it. Because John Lithgow is still going to be a guest someday.
Starting point is 00:23:00 His son keeps telling me it's going to happen. What if his son is really... The last message he sent to me is like, he's old. Just give him a second to figure it out. Because he hasn't emailed me lately. I got scared because I haven't heard from John Lithgow in a while. His play closed in New York, so he should
Starting point is 00:23:15 be coming back out here. Maybe he keeps looking in the mailbox for a computer from you. Send me a computer and then I'll come. Alright. Is that really the category? Yeah, why? Do you not know? Are you familiar with John Lithgow at all? I know one You know more than you think You don't need to just know
Starting point is 00:23:33 He's been in some pretty big movies I look forward to playing And some obscure ones Some obscure ones that I've chosen just for tonight So let's start with Kate You can pick the year Oh, we gotta pick contestants for you guys. I almost forgot again.
Starting point is 00:23:46 Oh, shit. Because I've got some great prizes here. I'm playing for somebody in the crowd? Yeah, you've got to play somebody in the crowd. That's right, Jim. I'm out. Yeah. What do you mean you're out? Too much pressure?
Starting point is 00:23:53 I don't like that poor person. They're not going to get anything. I don't know why I'm here. You don't know that, though. You're a champion. I'm here because I guessed Hoosiers when the category was basketball movies. And in fairness, I guessed Hoosiers three times in a row.
Starting point is 00:24:07 I kind of remember that. I was bound to hit it. You just kept yelling Hoosiers. That's right. Hoosiers and hoop dreams and fast break. Done. Paul got fish to save Pittsburgh with no guesses. I mean, no names.
Starting point is 00:24:20 He got it with no guesses. He didn't say anything. I just knew. I looked at you. I knew he had an idea Yeah yeah yeah He had that fish face on What's your name?
Starting point is 00:24:30 Ashley Who would you like to have play for you? Kate or Or Jimmy wants to recuse himself So I wouldn't choose him Or Okay Kate She didn't even let me say your name Paul
Starting point is 00:24:39 We're in this together She didn't want to hear it Alright Ladies Mary Kate and Ashley Alright Right? The Olsens. They're playing.
Starting point is 00:24:48 I leaned up to say that. Scott, who would you like to have play for you, Scott? Kate? Oh, she's taken. But not in general, fellas listening. Right? You're still single? Yes. Alright, cool.
Starting point is 00:25:04 Would you like Jimmy or Paul to play for you? Oh, he's going to take the dapper Mr. Paul of Tompkins. Thank you. He editorialized in there. And what's your name? Ruzi. Ruzi? All right. And let's go to the next guy.
Starting point is 00:25:20 Hold on a second. I like Ruzi. Here's why I like Ruzi. I like Ruzi. Here's why I like Roosie. I like Roosie. Here's why I like Roosie. I want Roosie. Because he gestured with his beer bottle
Starting point is 00:25:28 when he said his name. Yeah, yeah, Roosie. You know me, Roosie. I keep getting older and the high school girls stay the same. Is Roosie my guy? Roosie's your guy,
Starting point is 00:25:39 I guess. Me and you, Roosie. Unless he wants to pick somebody else. All the way to the end. We're not going to win, Roosie. What were your expectations? Scott and Paul and Ashley and Kate Yeah, those are the teams
Starting point is 00:25:51 Alright, Rosie Let's do this Leonard I almost said Leonard Somebody scoffed at you saying Alright, Rosie Idiot Rosie doesn't have a shot.
Starting point is 00:26:05 I was mad about it. Here we go. Kate, would you like to play a John Lithgow movie from 1998 to 2006? Or 84, 1984? Oh. 98. 98, 2006, or 84? 98? 98, please. All right, Kate. Here we go. What's up? Is Paul okay? 98 98 2006 or 84 98
Starting point is 00:26:25 98 please alright Kate here we go what's up is Paul okay I don't know people are laughing I did my famous
Starting point is 00:26:31 one syllable John Lithgow impression and a few people laughed at it wait do it again oh that's what he sounds like that's not bad
Starting point is 00:26:44 are you who do you think you're emailing That's what he sounds like? That's not bad. Who do you think you're emailing? Are you going to be stunned when this guy shows up? Oh, you know what? I confused him with David Strathairn. That guy's awesome. I love that guy. He's always good.
Starting point is 00:27:03 I was on an episode of Monk with him really he walked past me and every time I'd arrest me go hello Jimmy and I'd say hello David and then run because I didn't want to talk anymore to him I panicked hello Jimmy did he say like that mm-hmm every time I thought he was mocking me every single time. It sounded like he was. Your instincts were correct. Hello, Jimmy. David. Did he ever say goodnight and good luck? He did, every time. I said, I gotta go do my scene. He'd say goodnight and good luck.
Starting point is 00:27:34 Alright, Kate. Goodbye, Jimmy. Leonard gives this three and a half stars. I don't know. I don't know about the three and a half stars. Give me the year again, please. 98. Thank you, Kate. You're welcome. I don't know about the three and a half stars. He says the year again, please. 98. Thank you, Kate. You're welcome. I don't know about the three and a half stars. He says it's engrossing, literate, well-observed. Something's going on.
Starting point is 00:27:54 He says it's based on a true story. Okay. Kathy Bates appears unbilled. Oh, we know it. Jimmy thinks he knows it? No. Okay. I'm playing not to come back for the finals.
Starting point is 00:28:06 I'll start with Kate. There are 12 names. How many names do you think you get this in? From 19. Let's try. 98. Five? Oh.
Starting point is 00:28:19 I know. Nice bid. Nice bid. Thanks. Paul F. Tompkins. What do you think? How many names do you think? Four names. He says four names. Jimmy Pardo. I'm going to say name that movie.
Starting point is 00:28:29 Alright. Is that what I do? I don't know if that's what I do. Classic move. Yeah, you did that right. I think this is going to be a tough one, but also, it's doable. Three and a half stars. 1998. All those other words I said. Engrossing, literate, well observed. All those other words I said.
Starting point is 00:28:46 Engrossing, literate, well observed. Unbuilt Kathy Bates. Engrossing, literate, based on a true story. Yes. James Gandolfini is in this movie. Do you have a one word impression of him? Of course, from where the wild things are. Alright, then Dan Hedaya.
Starting point is 00:29:09 Loretta. Sidney Pollack. Tomato. I don't know. From Tootsie. He was in Tootsie. Peter Jacobson. I don't know who that is. And then there's this actress
Starting point is 00:29:26 He's the guy in this movie That I'm trying to guess Yeah Kathleen Quinlan 98 huh Yeah 98 3 and a half stars
Starting point is 00:29:38 So those are the Those are the bottom Those are the bottom four Bottom five Five names you got Oh I got five By accident That's awesome Oh I gave you by accident. That's awesome.
Starting point is 00:29:45 Oh, I gave you that extra name that's not helpful. That did not help. Oh, Peter Jacobson. Peter Jacobson's in it. Gandolfini, Sidney Pollack. Yeah. Unbilled Kathy Bates. 98.
Starting point is 00:29:58 Johnny Lith, of course. Danadaya. Danadaya. I'm not arguing that with you. Is this movie engrossing? I Yeah Maybe I need to go back And like
Starting point is 00:30:14 Sometimes Leonard helps me To go find my way And re-see a movie Because I I thought this movie Wasn't that great But what do I know? Anything? I don't I can't i can't come up
Starting point is 00:30:28 with it all right i'll say the rest of the names we'll have a fun jimmy gets the point uh lithgow bruce norris jelko ivanek uh william h macy the aforementioned tony shalhoub robert duvall. Bobby D. And number one, yeah, see what I'm saying? This movie's not so engrossing, is it? Number one star of the movie, John Travolta.
Starting point is 00:30:53 Oh. Oh. He was directed by Steve Zalian. And it was about a slick Boston injury lawyer who gets in over his head when he takes a case against two industrial giants whose alleged pollution of a river
Starting point is 00:31:05 caused the deaths of children in Woburn, Mass. Engrossing, literate, well-observed, adapted by the director from Jonathan Hart's bestseller...
Starting point is 00:31:15 Grease! And it's called... It's called Grease. No, it's called A Civil Action. Oh, God, man. I... Remember that shit?
Starting point is 00:31:22 Yeah. Oh, my God. Right? Ugh. Right? Did you see that? No! Who did? I saw it. I barely remember it. But Gandolfini was impressive.
Starting point is 00:31:36 Leonard has to see them! That's his job. People saying Leonard. Infuriating. Leonard saw it. So Jimmy gets the point. Thank you. We start with Kate again.
Starting point is 00:31:50 This is how he's in the champion. No, I know. I answered right. No, he got Hoosiers with nothing. Oh, take that away from me. 2006, Kate? 1984 or 2004? What year do you like?
Starting point is 00:32:03 Oh, yeah. 2004. Okay, yeah. 2004. Okay, here we go. This is a tournament of champions. It's exciting. The champions get a lot of pussy. You're right about that. Shut up, Kate.
Starting point is 00:32:24 Quit using your deep voice, Kate. All right, this is from 2004. Three stars he gives it. I think that's reasonable. I'll agree with that. You think that's reasonable or unreasonable? I think it's reasonable. And he calls it, Leonard calls it startlingly frank, evocative, superior performances, and a keen sense of period detail.
Starting point is 00:32:52 Period detail is helpful. 2004, Kate. And there's a lot of names. Sounds like there's a lot of names. A lot of names? Too many to count, Doug? 18 names. 18 names.
Starting point is 00:33:02 18 names. What do you think, Kate? I'm going to say let's do eight names. Eight names. Paul F. Tompkins, that's a... Seven names. She eliminated 10. Really?
Starting point is 00:33:11 I'll say seven names. All right, seven names to you, Jimmy. Because I can't add names, right? I can't say, oh, hey, that's preposterous. I would go 12. No. We're not in a hot tub. Kate, I think Kate started too low.
Starting point is 00:33:25 Oh, sorry. With their 18 names, which means there's six names, and they're the bottom dwellers, right? The six we get are from the bottom? Yeah. Yeah. Bottoms up. You know what? I refuse to get a point by saying name that movie, so I will say six.
Starting point is 00:33:39 Oh, I like that. The person on the field that plays with the most integrity usually gets beat up pretty bad. Well, I'm already up one. I'm willing to take the hit. True of all things. True of all things. Yes. Kate, he said six names.
Starting point is 00:33:56 So you could say name that movie or you could try to go less. Say five. All right. Let's say five. All right. Let's say five. Wow. She says five names, Paula Tompkins. Four names. Oh.
Starting point is 00:34:13 Well, you must have some idea then. I don't. Well, Jimmy, now you're back in the position again. I'm back in the, oh. So I could say, name it. You're not going to, and I get a point. I'm not happy with that. That's not how I want to win this game.
Starting point is 00:34:34 I like to play, Jimmy. That's not how I was raised. I like to run. That's not how I was raised. Open up that gate. Let me out. What did you say? I said what?
Starting point is 00:34:44 Four names? You said four? Four names. Four names. Three. Three. Oh. What did you say? I said what? Four names? You said four? Four names. Four names. Three. Oh. Three names says Jimmy Pardo. Say two again.
Starting point is 00:34:50 Keeping it interesting. Let me give you the clues again. Let me give you the clues again. No, I would tell you. I would be. Leonard Mullen gives it three stars. It's from 2004. John Lithgow is in it.
Starting point is 00:35:02 I could not tell you for the life of me what he did in it. I saw no movies in 2004. Lithgow takes in it I could not tell you for the life of me what he did in it I saw no movies in 2000 Lithgow takes small parts sometimes That's part of what's impressive about him As an artist Startlingly frank Evocative Superior performances And a keen sense of period detail
Starting point is 00:35:20 I may know it I think you might too I don't know if I do at all. Alright. Tell me to name it, Kate. What's happening? Oh, Kate, three names? Yeah, Jimmy said three names. You gotta go less or say name it? Or two to you, Kate. Say two.
Starting point is 00:35:36 Or not to me? What happened to me? Am I still in it? No, you could just sit and wait for a second. I either say two or name that movie. Yeah, you could make Jimmy name that movie. That would be a mean move, though, wouldn't it? What do you mean mean? You guys are here to win.
Starting point is 00:35:51 All right, you know what? Name that movie. You guys are here to win nothing. I say name that movie. I heard her say two. I heard her say two. I think you're going to like these names. Okay, here we go.
Starting point is 00:36:00 Because two of them I've never heard of, and one just died. What, out of two names? No, wait. Three names. Three names. Three names. Okay, here we go. Because two of them I've never heard of and one just died. What, out of two names? No, wait. Three names. Three names. Three names. Three names. And the movie is 2004, am I correct? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you trying to have a feel for it, you think? No, I do not, sir. Okay. Catherine Houghton.
Starting point is 00:36:18 Oh, yeah. I know it now. Do you want spelling on that? No, I do not. That would not be helpful. Lynn Redgrave. Who just left us, right? Yeah, we lost her. Yeah, she was great. And then Dagmara Dominichk. Dominichk.
Starting point is 00:36:36 Dominichk. I'm going to say, based on 18 people in the cast, and what the gentleman said. I'm going to say Wag the Dog. Oh. That's a guess. I don't think Lithgow was even in Wag the Dog. How the fuck do I know what he's in? You didn't know he was in this either. That's true, but that's incorrect. Kathleen Shalfont,
Starting point is 00:36:58 Veronica Cartwright, John McMartin, Heather Goldsmith, William Sadler, Julianne Nicholson, Dylan Baker, Oliver Platt, Tim Curry, Heather Goldsmith, William Sadler, Julianne Nicholson, Dylan Baker, Oliver Platt, Tim Curry, John Lithgow, Timothy Odden, Peter Sarsgaard, Chris O'Donnell, Laura Linney, and Liam Neeson in the title role
Starting point is 00:37:14 of... Taken. John Lithgow played his kidnapped daughter. It was a remarkable performance. What I want you to do now is get under the bed. Then they're going to take you. Why did I have to get under the bed, Dad?
Starting point is 00:37:33 All right. The movie's called Kinsey. Wow, I forgot about that movie. Yeah, it was directed by Bill Condon. Are you familiar with him at all, Jimmy? I am. That gentleman directed me in the movie Dreamgirls. Directed you to out of the movie, correct?
Starting point is 00:37:48 That's right. He directed me in and cut me out. Was he a good guy, though? Very pleasant. Laughed at a lot of my uncomfortable jokes. How did he say hi to you every day? Hello, Jimmy. So Kate has a point and Paul has a point, right?
Starting point is 00:38:04 No, I have a point. I want to give your point to Paul. What? Just because you didn't feel like you earned it. That seems fair. No. I don't think it does. All right.
Starting point is 00:38:14 So Paul, you've got a lot of work to do here. That was startlingly frank. So Kate and Jimmy each have a point. John Lethko played the dad, right? In Kinsey? The dad of Kinsey? Yeah, he was probably like, you shouldn't have sex.
Starting point is 00:38:27 And he was like, oh, I'm not only going to have sex, I'm going to do a study. That's what you do when your parents try to hold you back. 2006, Paul F. Tompkins, you get to pick. Okay, I'm going to say 2006. Or 84.
Starting point is 00:38:42 84. 84 is interesting to me Or 90 1990 2006, 84, or 90 I like 2006 because of its proximity to 2010 I do too But
Starting point is 00:38:57 1984 I feel like that was a prime time in my movie going young life I might be able to nail this son of a bitch. People write to me and say they hate this part, the bidding. They're wrong. I think it's fun. I'm having a great time talking.
Starting point is 00:39:21 1984! Here we go, 84. Another 1984. It's go, 84. Another 1984. It's Billy Squire. Two and a half stars from Len. The famous drummer. Two and a half stars from Len, even though this is somewhat considered a classic.
Starting point is 00:39:40 From 84. But Len does say this. He says, too much emphasis on hackneyed story. Oh, boy. Yeah. Took it to task. 11 names, Paul F. Tompkins.
Starting point is 00:39:57 I can name that movie in one name. People in the audience think they know. Really? One name. He in the audience think they know. Really? One name says... I say to you, I can say it in zero. Oh!
Starting point is 00:40:13 Now wait, wait, wait. Kate McEwchie likes to come in with the negative names, which means you can name the movie and name a name from the cast. No, I didn't know you could do that. Well, then I want to add on to that. Well, you wait until she bids. It's her bid, I didn't know you could do that. Well, then I want to add on to that. Well, you wait until she bids. It's her bid.
Starting point is 00:40:26 I will. I don't know this movie. So you have to say Jimmy Pardo named this movie, or you have to bid negative one and hope that Paul will take it to two and that Jimmy will take it to three. This gets very exciting. So if I bid negative one,
Starting point is 00:40:41 it could... Okay, I say negative one. Paul, what do you say? I can name that movie in negative three names. Holy shit! Three names, Jimmy. Out of 11 names. Those are the same three I know.
Starting point is 00:40:59 Oh, dig deep. There's some other people in it. If you know what movie it is, there's some other people in it. Tournament of Champions. What did you say, three? Yes, I did. Three. You can't think of more than three people in this movie?
Starting point is 00:41:25 I'll say four I would love it if you guys were even thinking of the wrong movie I'll say four That's a good chance He says four names I'm gonna go four So Kate has to pull the trigger on it now I don't know this movie
Starting point is 00:41:37 Name that movie Name that movie She can't If she said five, you couldn't name six people in it I bet I fucking could I actually do not bet that Yeah, yeah Alright, so Jimmy has to do four names
Starting point is 00:41:51 Do I give you the people first or the movie first? You might as well give us the movie first We think it's Footloose We believe it's Footloose It's Footloose, yes Alright, so we got Kevin Bacon So now you have to name four people from it Kevin, that's one
Starting point is 00:41:59 Good pull Chris Penn Two Laurie Singer Three Who's he leaving out? Good pull. Chris Penn. Two. Laurie Singer. Three. Who's he leaving out? Am I missing the main one?
Starting point is 00:42:13 Don't say anything. This is the best thing that ever happened. Don't say anything. All right, so so far you have Kevin Bacon. Yes. Right? That's who you said? Chris Penn.
Starting point is 00:42:26 Chris Penn. Laurie Singer. Laurie Singer. Name a fourth person from Footloose. I know you can do it. Well, John Lithgow. That's the one. Is Aiden Quinn in this as well?
Starting point is 00:42:42 No Aiden Quinn. What movie was Aiden Quinn in with Laurie Singer? What movie was that? Oh, yeah. That was that one. Can you name another name? No. By the way, I was thinking of Buckaroo Banzai the whole time.
Starting point is 00:42:59 Really? Yeah, I really was. I could name six people from Buckaroo Banzai. I feel like I might be able to. Let me see if I can do it. Let me see if I can do it. Let's not ignore the fact that I just got another point. Oh, Jimmy Pardo got a point.
Starting point is 00:43:12 We'll play that other game later. Now let's get back to this. Peter Weller, of course. Yes, of course. That's one. The aforementioned Mr. Lithgow. Yeah. Gow.
Starting point is 00:43:24 Christopher Lloyd. Yes. If I'm not mistaken, our old friend Dan Adaya is also in that movie. Is Dan Adaya in that? Yep. Okay.
Starting point is 00:43:33 We have a verification from one guy. Sitting behind Ruzzi. Got it. Jeff Goldblum. Yes. Is in that movie. And this is the one
Starting point is 00:43:43 this is the one I was excited about because I thought, oh, this is the one I will get that nobody will get. Billy Vera. I know that one, too. From The Beaters? He had that song with The Beaters. What would you think if I had this moment? It was from Family Ties.
Starting point is 00:43:59 What would you think if I had this moment? What would you think if I had this moment? Wait, what are the words you're singing? What would you think if I had this moment? What are the words you're singing? What would you think? I got that. What would you think? If I held this moment? If I held this moment? I wish you would just say it instead of...
Starting point is 00:44:17 That takes the soul out of it. Yes, the whole band, Billy Vera and The Beaters were all in that movie. Yeah, Diane Wiest and Sarah Jessica Parker were also in Footloose, though. Sure. But you guys don't remember the female characters. And they're remaking it, but the casting keeps changing on it, so I don't know what's going to happen.
Starting point is 00:44:36 I can't wait, though. Because that's the thing you should do with Footloose, is update it. What would it be like if there was a town where there's no dancing in 2010? It would be even more fucking ridiculous than the first time around, which was ridiculous. That's my first thing. Jonathan Lithgow, how dare you stop dancing?
Starting point is 00:44:54 How dare you outlaw dancing? That's Harry Potter, boy! Why don't they set it in the Middle East, where it would make sense, and it would also make sense in today's crazy political climate. They could call it Berkloos. You gotta cut loose.
Starting point is 00:45:10 Berkloos. Kick off your hooded hat. Hooded hat. That's what I went with. Hooded hat. Kick off your hooded hat. Those ladies over there with their hooded hats.
Starting point is 00:45:19 Kick it off. Kick it off. Kick off your hooded hat. Kick off your hooded hat. Idiot. All right, so who won the point for that? Oh, I did. Me. Oh. Jimmy Pardo. Oh, so you won two points. Kick off your hooded hat. Idiot. Alright, so who won the point for that? Oh, I did.
Starting point is 00:45:29 Oh, so you won two points. Oh, so you win the whole thing. You did it. I was so excited that you might not think of John Lithgow when you were naming names. I'm not going to lie to you. There's a good chance I wasn't going to. I may have said it by mistake. There was one lady in the audience
Starting point is 00:45:47 had a dramatic reaction to the name Laurie Singer. Yes, she did. There was an audible gasp when Laurie Singer was said. What if that is Laurie Singer? Oh, my God, Laurie Singer! Are you in the audience? Don't talk about this! I love movies!
Starting point is 00:45:58 How does he know me? They told me that movie was a secret. Let's hear it for the book But you know what else John Lithgow was in That almost came up If anyone had chosen Give us the year 1996 Oh
Starting point is 00:46:17 I think I know it was 1990 Oh what was 1990 Was it Memphis Bell Yes Alright Wow Memphis fucking Bell. It was weird.
Starting point is 00:46:26 Honorable mention, Kate. I won. I know. I know. I was just wondering. That's amazing. I think you won. Look at that right there.
Starting point is 00:46:38 I did the plus four. Oh, isn't that funny? Remember Lithgow had that fake ponytail on? I never saw it. He's like in that fake ponytail on? I never saw it. He's like in one scene. What? You never saw the movie that Jimmy was cut out of? No.
Starting point is 00:46:49 Once I heard Jimmy was cut out of it, I was like, forget it. He was in Dreamgirls. He had a scene with John Krasinski. But I appreciate you standing tight with me, man. No, John Krasinski was in Dreamgirls. Maybe I should see this movie. The two of them played like Hollywood types having a meeting with Beyonce's character
Starting point is 00:47:07 and it's, yeah, it's not a great scene. It's a horrible scene. They cut me out. They left that shit scene in. I'll just fast forward through that part.
Starting point is 00:47:16 Do you want me to come over and do my scene when it's time? Oh, I would love that. So, Ruzi's our winner? Yeah,
Starting point is 00:47:22 Ruzi's our guy. Oh, I'm so glad because I don't remember the names of the other people Ashley and Scott Ruzi wins I was sent this by the nice people at Best Worst Movie
Starting point is 00:47:36 An awesome poster for Best Worst Movie Like I said earlier in the show Look for that in the town of you Best Worst Movie You also win a long sleeve black t-shirt from the House of Blues
Starting point is 00:47:49 where I will be playing on May 24th in San Diego. The House of Blues. Help ever hurt ever.
Starting point is 00:47:58 San Diego. And you also win a copy of my CD Doug Benson Professional Humor Idiot available on AST Records.com where you can also get Paul F. Tompkins' Freak Wharf
Starting point is 00:48:09 and Impersonal. It's true. Both of his CDs are on there. Thanks, most of you. And you can get Jimmy Pardo's CDs there as well. Pompous Clown, a new one coming up in 2010. Oh! And you also can get,
Starting point is 00:48:26 can you still get Bag of Corn shirts on there? You can get all sorts of Never Not Funny memorabilia. Be sure to listen to Never Not Funny, everybody. And Kate McHugh, do you have anything you'd like to plug? Any upcoming dates with Garfunkel and Oates? Well, I'll need... Your partner, Garfunkelkel will be here next week of course because she's in the Tournament of Champions.
Starting point is 00:48:49 I would like to say that on Wednesday the 19th I like having three microphones. It is fun. We're playing Largo at the Coronet. Largo in Los Angeles at the Coronet. A lovely venue.
Starting point is 00:49:03 You can see me doing the Benson interruption there once a month. Jimmy, when is... Doug, when does this drop? I like to say plop. This plops sometime this weekend. So you've got to plug a little further in advance. Well, if you get it this weekend, I'm in Seattle, and I need people to come to the show,
Starting point is 00:49:24 because I'm up against Brian Poseoussain, and nobody told me. So please come out to see me at Rebar. You guys are both in Seattle at the same time? We're both in Seattle at the same time. You should team up on both of your shows. How do we do that? Have one earlier and one later? That's a great idea.
Starting point is 00:49:38 I'm sure both venues will love to do that. You're at Rebar, and where's Brian? Brian, he's around. But listen, Seattle... This is on Saturday? This Friday and Saturday, 15th and 16th. And I will say in advance,
Starting point is 00:49:55 thank you for letting me down, Seattle. And then next Saturday... They won't really hear this probably. No, they won't. Then the 21st, I think it's Saturday the 21st, they'll be in Madison, Wisconsin at the Majestic. Saturday the 22nd, sir. Saturday the 22nd, then. All the better.
Starting point is 00:50:10 You'll be at the Majestic? It's one better than 21. I'll be at the Majestic Theater in Madison, Wisconsin. Will Jim Carrey be there? Of course he will be. Madison, Wisconsin, Majestic Theater. Oh, that's a nice venue. I walked by there when I was playing comedy club in town. Hopefully Posehn won't be there when you're there next weekend.
Starting point is 00:50:26 Yeah, or everybody will walk by it again. That weekend, I'm going to be at Rooster Teeth Feathers in Sunnyvale, California May 20th through 23rd. And then I'm doing my Friday the 13th 3D screening at Cinefamily on May 24th. I mentioned that earlier. House of Blues, Friday, May
Starting point is 00:50:42 Oh, Friday, May 28th. I said May 24th when I gave you your shirt Ah Ruzi When you look into Ruzi It's hard to Keep track of anything Cause he's so
Starting point is 00:50:51 Mesmerizing Oh he gave me a bong It says Government on it Government Stoners love to have fun With words It's fun
Starting point is 00:51:00 Change government To government Oh what could Take the government down? A mint. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Roozie knows how it works. And I'll be at the comedy stage this year at Bonnaroo,
Starting point is 00:51:14 so come see me there. Jimmy, do you have anything you want to plug really quick? Sure. Fort Wayne, Indiana this weekend. Next weekend on the 22nd, I am going to be opening at the Majestic Theater In Madison, Wisconsin Wait, you guys are on what?
Starting point is 00:51:30 No, I'll be in Fresno, California At some theater in Fresno On the 22nd Look for that theater 22nd of May Just Google Fresno and Ripardo Is it the Fresno Theater? Scroll past the Grapevine video and find where you're gonna be playing yeah what yes and I gotta remember to write
Starting point is 00:51:55 Eddie that's it that's all you got coming up that's usually enough I got things not going so good I make a lot of holes in the calendar huh I don't need going so good? I make a lot of money. A lot of holes in the calendar, huh? I don't need to travel very much. I make a lot of money. All right, we'll come back and see us again next week. This is the end of whatever season this was, episode 50. Thank you all for coming to watch it,
Starting point is 00:52:18 and thank you guys for participating in it, Kate and Jimmy and Paul. Excuse me, sir. And, yeah, shake hands like gentlemen. Who won, ultimately? Jimmy won. All right, we'll have you back in the future. And Paul is furious.
Starting point is 00:52:35 And, as always, Tobey Maguire is a shithead. And I didn't pick it, dude. She did. Ruzi is a shithead. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. She did. Ruzi is a shithead.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.