Doug Loves Movies - (Rebroadcast) Gilbert Gottfried, Neil Berkeley, Joe DeRosa and Samm Levine guest

Episode Date: April 13, 2022

With tragic passing of the fearless Gilbert Gottfried, we revisit his appearance on Doug Loves Movies from 2017. Live from the Millennium Biltmore Hotel in Los Angeles, Doug welcomes Gilbert ...Gottfried, Neil Berkeley, Joe DeRosa and Samm Levine to a special LA Podfest edition of the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on Stitcher Premium. For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey everybody. To commemorate the passing of the legendary comic Gilbert Gottfried, we dug up this one episode of Doug Loves Movies that he did four years ago. I recall that he wasn't particularly good at the games, but always had a joke ready to go and usually an offensive one. Rest in peace, Gilbert Gottfried. Make God uncomfortable.
Starting point is 00:00:39 Doug hates candy wrappers, squeaky babies, sticky seeds with 50 azotop or kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Because Doug loves movies Hey, hey, hey, everybody. My name is Doug, and I love movies.
Starting point is 00:01:21 This is Doug Loves Movies. We had one person jump the gun. A referee threw a flag on that one. Coming to you once again from LA Podfest. You guys are doing it. Day three, right? And everybody's having a nice time. Day three, right? And everybody's having a nice time? Very cool. And I know that there's one more, there's a couple more shows tonight.
Starting point is 00:01:55 There's one where you can talk with Graham Elwood and the other people that started the festival about podcasting. And Todd Glass' show, which I hear has like a full band. So I'm not going to tell you which one to go to, but I am going to tell you that I hope to get you out of here so that you can leave here and get over to that show in time. Is that other place they do shows in far away? It's right there?
Starting point is 00:02:22 Okay. Do you think people are lined up for those shows and just skipping this one altogether? I don't think. I think you're right. I don't think they're doing that. And I'm very appreciative. Let's see here. I said where we're at. We're at the Biltmore Hotel and it's Sunday October 8th 2017 what okay that's weird thank you for welcoming me does anyone else feel like they need to welcome me before I proceed are you mrs. Biltmore why when I said we're at the Biltmore, you're like, you're welcome. Thanks for coming to my hotel.
Starting point is 00:03:12 Did you bring a name tag? Then you're not welcome. Let's see those name tags, you guys. I saw that one on the internet today. The baseballs themed. I saw that one on the internet today. The Spaceballs themed. I like it. Oh, there's a very big one over there. What does that say on it?
Starting point is 00:03:33 Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid? Which one are you? Your name is Sid? Awesome. I guess. The lighting isn't great for me to see what all these say, but at least we got a lot of them. So thank you for... I know a lot of you traveled to be here,
Starting point is 00:03:53 so the fact that you managed to pack these things and bring them here and get through TSA, I applaud you, and thank you for doing that. You can put them down now. And, yeah, I was going to say festival badges don't count, you and thank you for doing that. You can put them down now. And yeah, I was going to say festival badges don't count, but I think you guys know that. And do they even
Starting point is 00:04:12 have badges at this festival? Oh, wristbands. Yeah, so this isn't a wristband thing. This is a name tag thing. Doug plugs. Doug Loves Movies is back in Hollywood tomorrow night at Meltdown Comics. And then this Thursday we're going to be in Kansas City, Missouri
Starting point is 00:04:28 all of my dates and deets and links are at douglosmovies.com that's douglosmovies.com yeah it's so funny how you did the first part so mellow then still came in with the hard yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:46 Good job, you guys. Nice work, my train seals. You guys are making, this is a great cult I've put together. Let's check out the prize bag. I brought some stuff, some typical stuff. I got a Douglas Movies T-shirt and a pipe from Peacemaker and a copy of my CD, Promotional Tool,
Starting point is 00:05:20 and a blue card from Getting Doug With High, a tumbler that says Tito's Handmade Vodka on it. Yeah! Welcome! And a gift card for $10 on iTunes so that you could purchase my most recent album Lexington or premium episodes of Douglas Movies. Do whatever you want with it. Yeah, buy a Juice Newton album. All that's in the prize bag plus stuff
Starting point is 00:05:58 brought by my four guests. We got four seats up here. And I set out to have four guests that will, I think, have not appeared We got four seats up here. And... I set out to have four guests that will, I think, have not appeared anywhere else at the festival this weekend because I love you guys, and you deserve the best shows possible for coming out.
Starting point is 00:06:17 Aw. Okay, I don't love all of you. Okay, I don't love all of you. Please give a big warm welcome. A warm welcome to Joe DeRosa, Neil Berkley, Gilbert Gottfried,
Starting point is 00:06:40 and Sam the Ma'am Levine, a.k.a. Lil' Logan! For the stand-ups on the panel, don't you love it when you're doing a show and they give you one of these things? Like, could it be more complicated? Yeah, those I hate yeah I can't stand those yeah I don't care for any of it this is Gilbert Gottfried everybody first time guest on the show and star of a brand new documentary film
Starting point is 00:07:56 called Gilbert yeah you have to watch the movie to see what the title means. It's pretty sneaky. We don't know which Gilbert it's referring to. It's kind of like Hat Full of Rain. You don't know what the title means until you're deep into it. You know, you don't know what the title means until you're deep into it.
Starting point is 00:08:30 Gilbert, can you give us one quick joke just to warm everybody up? Okay, let's see. Oh, a guy wakes up in a hospital bed and the nurse is standing over him. And the nurse says, sir, you were in a bad car accident. You won't be able to feel anything from the waist down. And the man goes, okay, can I feel your tits? I'm sick of sexual harassment in the workplace,
Starting point is 00:09:12 but in a hospital, that seems fine. Seems like a good spot for it. And also joining us today is the director of the motion picture, Gilbert. It's Neil Berkley, everybody. Thank you. Thank you. It's a terrific movie, and when can people start watching it? You can all see it.
Starting point is 00:09:34 If you're in New York, you can see it on November 3rd at IFC Center in Soho. And then if you're in L.A., you can see it at the Lemley Fine Art on November 10th. And please go see it in theaters yes do that
Starting point is 00:09:47 it's fun to to laugh and cry with other people it's more touching than you would imagine based on the joke this man just told you said what you said about it was like thrilling for me you said about it was, like, thrilling for me.
Starting point is 00:10:07 You said it was the sweetest and filthiest movie you'd seen all year. Yeah. And I love that. It checks off both of those boxes. And it's great. And thank you for, you know, using Gilbert as a subject matter. I'm a fan of a couple of your other documentaries. He also directed Harmontown.
Starting point is 00:10:27 And then Beauty is Embarrassing, a movie about Wayne White, the artist. Yeah. It's kind of cool that one person was so excited about that one. That's right. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:10:48 Thank you. It is really good. Also joining us here today is, I like to call him now a regular on the show, even though he's only made an appearance once or twice, but it's my friend, comedian Joe DeRosa. Hello. I've been on like four times. Four times?
Starting point is 00:11:12 Yeah. You think? The last one was the third. This is the fourth time. Okay. All right. Well, I mean, you know, don't downplay. Maybe you only made an impression one of the times.
Starting point is 00:11:23 Can I tell a joke too? I guess. All right. I didn't know that's what we were doing, but all right. Well, do you not want me to? Well, now we have to. Okay.
Starting point is 00:11:34 Because I just feel like Gilbert will like this joke. So there's a six-year-old boy. Yeah, you're right. He's already in. There's a six-year-old boy. I don't need any more. Yeah, that's... He's sitting on the edge of the Grand Canyon crying,
Starting point is 00:11:59 and an old man walks up, and he says, Hey, kid, why are you crying? And the six-year-old boy says, my mommy and daddy just fell over the cliff and died. And the old man pulls his zipper down and goes, this just ain't your fucking day, is it, kid? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, Thanks for being here, Joe. And also... And also, for his 57th appearance,
Starting point is 00:12:36 it's Sam Levine! Thank you. Thank you. Is that number real, Doug? This is what a sweetheart Sam is. Today we were somewhere at the airport at some point, and somebody called you Mr. Levine. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:55 And you just let it go. I did. Yeah, didn't correct him. No. Yeah. I don't need to ruin his day. With all your Jew nonsense? Exactly.
Starting point is 00:13:05 Yeah. Honestly, I'm lucky they just don't call to ruin his day. With all your Jew nonsense? Exactly. Yeah. Honestly, I'm lucky they just don't call me Uten. You know? Wow, wrong crowd, I guess. Guys, it's okay. Nazis are very popular now. Jews are allowed to crack jokes. It's how we survive. Gilbert, tell another one. Yeah, no, it's fine.
Starting point is 00:13:22 If it's someone like I'm going to be dealing with for a long period of time, I'll correct them. Of course you will, yeah, no, I, I, it's fine. If it's someone like I'm going to be dealing with for a long period of time, I'll correct them. Of course you will. Yeah. If it's a gate agent who I will never see again for the rest of my life, he can call me anything he'd like. All right. Well, I hope somebody takes you up on that.
Starting point is 00:13:36 Yep. Attention gate agents. Calls you something really mean. Um, we had a lovely time, uh, yesterday doing a show in St. Louis that's available now to listen to. I know you guys have been going to podcasts all weekend, so you probably haven't been listening to any. But you can check it out on your travels home tomorrow. Or you can listen to this one again. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:00 Yeah, because when you're here, that's exciting to listen to your own laugh, hear yourself welcoming the host to the venue. And it's important to memorize the show. Now, Gilbert has a podcast. What's your podcast called? Oh, Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast. I'd like to do that show sometime, if that's okay. Oh, I'm sorry, Whitbook. Yeah. Booked out for the rest of time.
Starting point is 00:14:45 Yeah. I mean, I think the world of you, don't get me wrong, but I'm really sorry. Now, do you have any kind of concept of what's going to happen here on this podcast today? No. No one walked you through it? No one told me anything. Okay, well we'll try to explain
Starting point is 00:15:08 everything as we go along because there's some elements to it that you might go, what is happening? And one of those is that all of my guests bring something that they contribute to the prize bag which is what someone
Starting point is 00:15:23 in the audience will win today. Did you bring something? No one told me. Neil, you didn't tell him? He comes up to me. You're supposed to direct him in life now. Technically, yes. As I'm walking on stage,
Starting point is 00:15:40 he says, oh, you're supposed to bring something. I think whoever wins today, I've just come up with a prize. Would you mind giving them a hug? Oh, okay. That would be a great, I think it's a great prize. Yeah. No photographs of the hug will be allowed.
Starting point is 00:16:02 Yes, it's going to be a very private hug. It's going to be a very private hug. It's going to be overlooking the Grand Canyon. It's going to give you a real scenic hug and then some bad news. Neil? We did talk briefly, yes, right before the show we talked, but there was the idea
Starting point is 00:16:22 that I pitched, if you're okay with it, in front of a crowd. Gilbert, doing the voicemail message. That's even better. You could do a voicemail message like an angry bird or something. No, that would be new for me.
Starting point is 00:16:44 Neil, did you have something for the prize bag? I thought that was my... Oh, the two of you are contributing that? Sorry, I blew it. That's all right. You can direct the hug. Yeah. All right.
Starting point is 00:16:58 Yeah, maybe we should film. You should film it. All right, well, Joe's definitely going to come through because we've discussed this and he's always very concerned about bringing prizes that everybody likes. You mean the one or two times I've been here? Yeah. I did bring prizes
Starting point is 00:17:17 because you texted me four times and said don't forget the prize bag. So I guess if you star in a documentary you don't get fucking pressured to bring shit for the prize i don't have gilbert's phone number i did i am i supposed to tell you what i brought right now or yeah you've been on the show 50 times i just remembered another time i was on when we did that will smith movie at the movie theater where it doesn't count Where love comes and gives them the letters or whatever it is.
Starting point is 00:17:48 Yeah, that was not good. Yeah, it was terrible. This is a thing I'm re-gifting not because I don't want it, but because Matt McCarthy, very funny comedian, gave me these two Godzilla DVDs. One is a Mothra double feature.
Starting point is 00:18:04 And one is Godzilla, Mothra double feature. And one is Godzilla, Mothra, and King... I don't know how to say it. Ghidorah? How do you say that one? Nobody knows? I don't know. A giant monster's all-out attack, okay? So I'm upgrading to the Blu-rays, which
Starting point is 00:18:20 is why he gave me these, and now I give them to one of you. Yes. Yes. Sounds like you're something of a Godzilla connoisseur. I'm not. These were the only two I owned, but I'm a completist and I'm like, I can't stand owning two DVD. I have to buy the entire Blu-ray set now all at once, which is a sickness. I'm sick. I collect Blu-rays and DVDs. The guy who walked around in a Godzilla suit died recently. Tom Petty?
Starting point is 00:18:52 Yeah. Tom would laugh if he were not dead. I'm sure he'd like it. I wish this was a comedy club, because there's someone I would have thrown out. I know. This venue doesn't have any bouncers. Sam, what do you got for the bag?
Starting point is 00:19:22 All right. For those of you who somehow have heard yesterday's show, which technically is possible, from my pal Clark Wolf, some more Logan Lucky swag from their promotional tour. A trucker hat with the Logan Lucky logo. Ooh, try saying that three times fast. Logan Lucky logo, Logan Lucky logo. Yep, it can that three times fast. Logan Lucky logo, Logan Lucky logo,
Starting point is 00:19:45 yep, it can't be done. Can't be done. And then a Logan Lucky lighter that also has a bottle opener portion to it. That's pretty exciting. And from, oh, hey, Doug, what's up? Nothing. Cool.
Starting point is 00:20:01 From the, oh, no, it's going to fall. See, that's why I came over here. I I appreciate it you're a good man from CISO from the now sadly defunct CISO the entire first season of Take My Wife there it is Ray Butcher
Starting point is 00:20:19 and Cameron Esposito's magnificently funny show and I know that CISO is no longer alive but I really hope that that show finds a new know that CISO is no longer alive, but I really hope that that show finds a new venue because it's super funny. That looks like an empty box. It is not. There are DVDs in there, I assure you.
Starting point is 00:20:31 And then because I felt so terrible about when we played Willem Dafoe on Last Man Stanton last week, not one person said Boondock Saints, so a DVD of Boondock Saints. Good movie. I've never seen that movie, so maybe I should hang on to it.
Starting point is 00:20:48 Yeah, go for it. Haven't seen these either. I'm keeping all this shit. If I promise, I feel bad. I had in my head that we were a team and I didn't think anyone gave a shit about my other movies, but since you'll like them,
Starting point is 00:21:00 I can guarantee I'll send them to you. I have posters and DVDs of Beauty's Embarrassing. I would love to give someone that wins whatever, however this works. Yeah. I'll make sure you you I have posters and DVDs of Beauty's Embarrassing I would love to give someone that wins whatever this works I'll make sure you I swear you'll get it it's all good don't worry about it Neil just keep making great movies
Starting point is 00:21:20 about great people. All right, I have a question for everybody now that we got all the prizes. And since Sam knows what the question is, I'll start with him first. Okay. Because did you manage to watch something on the plane? What was the last movie that you saw? The last movie that I saw
Starting point is 00:21:43 that I actually did watch on the plane is The Outsiders. That is a strong choice. Yeah. S.E. Hinton and Francis Ford Coppola. Yeah. Yeah. I had never seen it all the way through, and I thought I should do that. Tom Cruise at his heaviest.
Starting point is 00:22:02 Tom Cruise at his heaviest. Very young. Barely in that movie. But yeah, also barely in it. Rob Lowe. That is a strange film with very unusual pacing.
Starting point is 00:22:15 I love Coppola and it is weird to see a movie like that that feels disjointed at times knowing he'd already made two Godfather movies. So he was a master storyteller. So clearly the blame lay on me for not understanding what he was doing.
Starting point is 00:22:32 It is weird, by the way, that I never thought of this. You just said it, that on The Outsiders, it's like we're going to pull way back on Cruise and Matt Dillon. Heavy macho. Heavy macho.
Starting point is 00:22:45 I mean, you know, hindsight is 20-20. You know, if he only knew now. But yeah, there's some weird long sequences to that movie that are like, I might have fallen asleep a couple times and woke up and I was like, oh, still in this sequence. But it's an enjoyable film. It's very there's some crazy shit that goes on in that movie that I did not see
Starting point is 00:23:10 coming. So if you haven't seen The Outsiders, check it out. Don't they straight up murder Leif Garrett in it? They sure do, spoiler alert. It's been a minute since I saw it. Yeah. It's pretty insane, though, the star power that came out of that movie when they were
Starting point is 00:23:25 no one. No one. Yeah, they were absolute teenagers. Diane Lane? Yes. Pretty much the youngest Diane Lane I can think of. Yeah. Well, I don't know why you'd need to think of her younger than that. It's a strange way to put it. He goes to Rumblefish. So Diane Lane was
Starting point is 00:23:43 sitting overlooking the Grand Canyon. And I forget how this one goes. But that's the last movie I saw, Doug. The Outsiders. Good answer, Sam. Thank you. Joe DeRosa, what was the last movie you saw? I know this.
Starting point is 00:24:04 I can't remember the last movie I literally saw, but the last movie I saw very recently in the theater was Mother. That was the last thing I saw. You mean Mother? Mother. Yeah. With an exclamation point. With an exclamation point.
Starting point is 00:24:16 It was awesome. I thought it was a work of art. I thought it was brilliant. I thought it was very mismarketed, and I blame the team and the filmmakers for that. I don't understand why they allowed it to be marketed like it was some kind of Rosemary's Baby horror movie. But the movie was awesome.
Starting point is 00:24:32 What would they tell people in your mind to get them to sit through that shit? I'll tell you... Because I didn't enjoy it at all. I'll tell you what made me enjoy it. I watched Jennifer Lawrence's explanation of the metaphor before I went to see it. So then I knew what I was walking into.
Starting point is 00:24:49 And then I was like, Oh, this is a really cool kind of art house movie. And I like that these famous sort of mainstream actors are in it. And it was, it was a cool thing, but you need a little of that explanation. If you don't get that,
Starting point is 00:25:03 they're playing it at the goddamn Glendale Pacific. You know, it's that and like Medea's Boo 2 are playing next to each other. It doesn't make any sense. Not to knock Tyler Perry's Boo 2. I'm not, you know, I am actually. The first, I walked out of the first one. But you saw Boo 1?
Starting point is 00:25:24 I did. I went to see Boo One. I ate two and a half gummy fish with weed in them. Wait. And drank a lot of whiskey. And went in, and about 25 minutes in, I was like, this is too much for me. I can't handle this right now.
Starting point is 00:25:38 There's a real movie called Tyler Perry's Madea Boo? It's called Boo, A Madea's Halloween. I was hoping it was called Boo 1. I was hoping we just called it out. Well, that's what we call it now. Now that there's a Boo 2 coming out. The sequel's called Boo 2. Well, he's not creative.
Starting point is 00:26:00 But it's a heavy flick, man. Oh, yeah. Wait, which one are we talking about the first one I haven't seen the second one yet but I remember
Starting point is 00:26:10 my friend Pat Walsh texted me cause he saw it before I did and he was equally as high when he saw it and he was like get ready dude
Starting point is 00:26:17 he goes for like these 15 minute scenes no edits he's like it's an odd really crazy movie and he does he'll hang in a scene for about 15 solid minutes.
Starting point is 00:26:28 Just full conversation. Now we're talking about Mother. No, this is Boo, too. Mother actually moves faster and more coherently than Tyler Perry's Boo on Madea Halloween. But what's with
Starting point is 00:26:44 Darren Aronofsky and just following a character around through wherever the movie is set? He did that in Black Swan, The Wrestler. Like, he just follows someone around as they wander through spaces. I know what you mean. It's because Pi, I hate the movie Pi. That was his first movie.
Starting point is 00:26:59 And when everybody goes, you're a genius, then they go, you can do this forever. So he just keeps kind of making better versions of Pi, in my opinion. But I saw Pi before when it first came out. I fucking hated it. Because it was just him following that guy around with the shaved head. He was like, I'm good at math. I was like, who gives a shit?
Starting point is 00:27:17 You're going to follow this fucking nerd around for two hours? Yeah, can't we follow Jennifer Lawrence around instead? Yeah. With a weirdly see-through top on the entire time? Not weird at all, just fun. See, she represented Mother Nature. Yeah, no, now I kind of get it. But still don't care.
Starting point is 00:27:40 Ed Harris and Michelle Pfeiffer were Adam and Eve, Cain and Abel, that's why one of their kids killed the other. Yeah. Are we talking about Tyler Perry's Medea Boo again? Yeah. I got lost. Tyler Perry dresses up as Michelle Pfeiffer and comes in and, yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:55 That's how they should market Mother is, hey, bone up on the Bible before you watch this shit. He's a big Bible guy, didn't Noah? Yeah, he did. Yeah. But he really rewrote some shit in noah he did first of all russell crowe right and rock biters what maybe we had rock biters yeah yeah he had rocks that bit people my parents are super religious and my mom couldn't wait to see noah and
Starting point is 00:28:19 she loves russell crowe and i called her one day and i go what'd you do today she goes i finally saw noah with russell crowe and i go oh good did you do today? She goes, I finally saw Noah with Russell Crowe. And I go, oh good, did you like it? She goes, I didn't. I'm a purist. They changed too much of the story. And I was like, Bible thumpers are exactly like comic book nerds. There is no fucking difference here.
Starting point is 00:28:37 There is zero difference. Have they been to the Ark Encounter in Kentucky? The what? The Ark Encounter. All right, Sam, not now. You and I will talk after the show. We don't have time for this. It's going to blow your mind.
Starting point is 00:28:54 Neil, have you seen any movies lately? The last movie I watched was The Bad Batch. Oh, a horror film? Ish. It's about cannibals, dystopian future. I heard it's good. It's good. Longish at times, but I enjoyed it.
Starting point is 00:29:15 All right. Thanks for that brief answer. I'm the only one that saw it. You're really helping me to move this thing along. You didn't see it? I saw it. That is actually, when you said it, I was like, oh, wait, that is the last movie I saw. I fucking hated it.
Starting point is 00:29:28 Yeah. I couldn't sit through it. All right. There's no reason to swear. I'm sorry. I don't mean to. There's a Jim Carrey cameo. That bothered you?
Starting point is 00:29:39 Have you watched an interview with that guy lately? He's doing something. He's up to something. He says he doesn't exist, and what he is is just an impression of what we think Jim Carrey is. Did he say it after he bent over and pulled open his ass cheeks?
Starting point is 00:29:52 Yes. We tried to get Jim Carrey for the documentary, and his excuse basically, at least he had an excuse, he was on trial for killing his ex-girlfriend. The things people will do to get out of being in a movie with you? I thought he could have said no. So that explains why he's doing all this existential bullshit. He's like, I couldn't have killed her. I'm not really here.
Starting point is 00:30:46 Have you seen any movies lately, Gilbert? Actually, I flew in today and watched two movies on the plane. One of them is the founder about that guy Ray Kroc, who's the head of McDonald's. Yeah. And he sounds like a total fucking prick yeah he yeah even with a likable actor like michael keaton i was just like this guy's just fucking people over yeah because he was like originally the mcdonald's brothers who created this whole thing and he stole it from them and became a billionaire.
Starting point is 00:31:26 Yeah. And, oh, and the other one. This is the movie everyone has been screaming for a remake of and that's going in style. Yeah, we need to see a new set of old guys pulling off a bank heist yeah and and every review when you talk about going in every conversation about it with, well, it's a pleasure to see these three pros working up there.
Starting point is 00:32:14 That means somehow you can allow it. And no one, if you're going to go see the film, you know, leave now, because I'll reveal the end. Nobody dies in it. In the first one, two of them die. Yeah, because they're very old. Yeah. And, and Morgan Freeman has a kidney problem.
Starting point is 00:32:43 So that would have killed him. They're setting it up that he's going to die. Yeah, they do. They set it up and he has an attack. And at the end, Alan Arkin gives Morgan Freeman his kidney. And you figure, if Alan Arkin at his age gave up a kidney,
Starting point is 00:33:03 he'd be dead. It would be bad. Yeah. That's not a time to donate organs and Morgan Freeman to get the kidney they go well this guy's gonna be dead in a week anyway even with a new kidney yeah why didn't he give his kidney
Starting point is 00:33:20 to a young person that needed it laughing laughing laughing crazy sounds like a great flight kidney to a young person that needed it. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha the just sitting around talking part of the show, and now we're going to play some games. So this is when I say, let the games begin! People brought signs, posters, name tags, call them whatever you want, but they all tend to be movie puns where they work their own name into the title, which Cassidy, she didn't have to do shit because her name is Sid, so it's right
Starting point is 00:34:07 there in Cassidy. There's lots to choose from and what I need is for each one of you to pick a name tag that you would like to play on behalf of today on the show. Is there one out there you see, Gilbert, that catches your eye?
Starting point is 00:34:23 Sam's going to go grab one. You mean of a movie? Yeah, does anybody have a movie that Gilbert is in as their sign? That'd be good. Yeah, does anyone have Funky Monkey? Or How to Be a Player? There are posters for either of those films. I doubt it.
Starting point is 00:34:47 But Joe, go pick one. Neil, go pick one. I already know the one. I want this one. I've had my eye on it for a while. All right. Yeah. And while you guys do that, we're going to go to a brief commercial message.
Starting point is 00:35:02 We'll be right back. We're back. And Gilbert has chosen. It says, says I'm Charlene I'm Marlene sequence from Spaceballs which name is yours she's Charlene so that's that's the name tag her name is Mel Brooks there's some classic stuff in that Spaceballs movie. Why weren't you in Spaceballs? Do you know one time I auditioned for a Mel Brooks movie and I lost the part to Billy Barty? He was that famous midget.
Starting point is 00:35:40 He was little. Yeah, he was a midget. So they decided to go that way with it. Yeah, yeah. We went some, we're going with someone more compact. It's a small set. We built the set too small. Gilbert, you're way too big for this part.
Starting point is 00:36:02 All right, so you're playing for Marlene Charlene and Neil, what do you got there? To Live and Die in L.A. Yeah, that's a play on To Live and Die in L.A. which is another Willem Dafoe movie we didn't mention and it's a great one. It's my favorite. Who are you playing for, Joe?
Starting point is 00:36:20 Excuse me, this is an Edge of Tomorrow poster, Live Diana. Repeat, and I picked this because I hate this goddamn movie Excuse me, this is an Edge of Tomorrow poster. Live Diana. Repeat. And I picked this because I hate this goddamn movie. And I don't understand why people love it so much. So I don't know. I just, I feel like I've gotten into very long bar arguments about this movie. Just shit-faced.
Starting point is 00:36:40 Yeah, I don't care for it. Is it too repetitive for you? What's the problem? I'm just like, it doesn't make any goddamn sense. They're like, we need the PR guy to go fight in the... It doesn't make any fucking sense. The movie, it doesn't make any sense. Well, they were setting him up. Why?
Starting point is 00:36:58 Because he was the PR guy. But they like the war. The people that set him up like the war. So why are they mad at him? We'll get a drink after this. I didn't get to the end of it. I cut it off about 15 minutes in. He didn't die quickly enough.
Starting point is 00:37:15 Oh, you missed the best part. That's when it gets brilliant. That's what everybody says. Oh, you didn't watch to the 37th minute? That's when it gets good. Yeah, no, fuck that. All right. Sam?
Starting point is 00:37:28 I went with the Mikey Ducks, which is not a Mighty Ducks poster, but a nearly two-pound bag of Haribo gummy bears. And I have to hand it to Mikey. He clearly knew about my previous one-bag-a-day habit of Haribo gummy bears that plagued me for about a decade. Do you used to eat a bag of gummy bears every day? Every damn day.
Starting point is 00:37:57 Wow. That big? No, no, no. The regular. The regular bag. This is just diabetes if I ate this every day. All right. Well, that's who you guys are playing for. The first game we're going to play today is called Characters Welcome.
Starting point is 00:38:13 And I'm going to list off the characters in the credits of a motion picture. And just guess as often as you like the first person to name this movie that all of these characters is in wins this game. All right? Starting with, and no audience guesses, please. Man at Street Corner is a character in this film. A street car named Desire. No. No.
Starting point is 00:38:46 There's a character called, just credited as Thug. This movie's got one or more thugs in it. There's a character named Mendoza. Scarface. No. Great guess, though. Probably is a character named Mendoza in Scarface. Here's another one that's probably in Scarface, but it's also in this movie.
Starting point is 00:39:09 Someone named Vinny. My cousin Vinny? No, just Vinny. There's a parking valet. There's a rap-singing guard. On Beverly Hills Cop. Two. Correct! The parking valet is played by Chris Rock in that movie.
Starting point is 00:39:54 Yes. Yeah. And then there's the other characters I was going to say are Chip Cain, Carla Fry, Maxwell Dent, Sidney Bernstein, played by Gilbert Gottfried. Thank you. thank you. And then, of course, the title character, Axel Foley. And the director of that film, Tony Scott, jumped off a bridge. Are you saying there's a connection between you working with him?
Starting point is 00:40:21 Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. between you working with him? See, he should have jumped off the bridge right before he filmed me. That would have been... But that was an interesting movie because it got more action-y and darker than the first Beverly Hills Cop, and so you ended up being the most funniest scene in the movie, I think, because
Starting point is 00:40:45 a lot of it was kind of serious. Oh, yeah. There was... Juergen Prochnow was in that. Oh, yes. He's funny. And what's her name? Bridget Nielsen. Yeah, do you have to deal with her at all? Not so much back then,
Starting point is 00:41:04 but I remember, see, originally, Sly Stallone was supposed to be the Beverly Hills cop, but they kept his girlfriend, Brigitte Nielsen, and then I think there were all these
Starting point is 00:41:19 rumors that Eddie was fucking her or the director was fucking her. Well, we can only ask one of them. What really happened, and he's pretty hard to get pinned down. Well, some people who were standing on the bridge said, Did you fuck Bridget Nielsen? Fuck Bridget Nielsen!
Starting point is 00:41:51 You know, I'm glad podcasting came along so you could say this sort of stuff and not get fired from anything. Right! All right, so Gilbert won that game. Congratulations, Gilbert, but there's more. That means you get to go first in this next game. It's called Whose Tagline Is It Anyway? I'm going to say a tagline that was on a poster or in some sort of advertising for a movie,
Starting point is 00:42:23 and you have to guess what movie that's the tagline for. And Gilbert, I'll ask you first, and then we'll go to Neil, Joe, and Sam, see if anybody can figure out what this is the tagline for. It goes like this. It's not what is outside, but what is inside that counts. What do you think that's the tagline for? The only thing I could think of, just because it was on TV recently, and it could work as a pun, but it's probably not,
Starting point is 00:42:54 would be hollow man. It's not what is outside, but what is inside that counts. Okay. No. Strangely, no. Yeah, I didn't think so. Let's give Neil a shot at it. What do you think, Neil?
Starting point is 00:43:12 I have inner space. No. Joe? I feel like this is so on the nose, but it would be so right. Inside out. No. Shit. Sam?
Starting point is 00:43:27 I'm going to take a guess here. That's what we would like you to do. Is it the movie Aladdin? That is correct. I see what we're doing here. A theme. I see what we're doing here. A theme. I see what you're doing here, Doug. Wait, why is that the tagline for Aladdin?
Starting point is 00:43:51 That doesn't make any goddamn sense. Yeah, it's a puzzler. It's because he's not really a prince. He's a pauper. Yeah. He's also inside the can. The genie, yeah. I would guess the tagline would be,
Starting point is 00:44:08 everybody should have a monkey that steals for them. That's the new Planet of the Apes tagline. Okay, so Sam got that one. Now we'll do another one. We'll start with you again, Gilbert. What movie has the tagline, Bring Protection? I shouldn't lose this.
Starting point is 00:44:33 Yeah. No. Neil? Problem Child? Oh, I see what you're doing. no Neil problem child oh I see what you're doing no Joe Def Jams how to be a player cause he has a lot of sex
Starting point is 00:44:58 bring protection and Gilbert's in it oh that kind of protection bring a condom to the movie you think is what they're saying? Yeah, because the guy in the movie might fuck you. Because he fucks everybody all the time. And then Gilbert yells at him.
Starting point is 00:45:13 You're funny in that movie. The bellhop guy. Oh, thank you. I think it's a movie that's coming back. Yeah. They're going to remake it with Alan Arkin and Michael Caine. Sam? A Million Ways to Die in the West?
Starting point is 00:45:32 That is correct. You are Abe Lincoln. Yes. We got somebody on the panel that knows your movies better than you do, Gilbert. I didn't think it was Dr. Doolittle. Brain protection. Abe Lincoln, a character that you get asked to play a lot, right? Yeah, I was Abe Lincoln on an episode of The View
Starting point is 00:45:57 and Abe Lincoln in A Million Ways to Die in the West. Move over, Daniel Day-Lewis. It's time to retire, DDL. Okay, let's try another one, Gilbert. He's bad, she's worse. I'm gonna say that this is Problem Child 2. That is correct.
Starting point is 00:46:27 Yes. Alright, so we got one more. It's a tiebreaker between Sam and Gilbert. The two leading experts on Gilbert Gottfried movies. Oh boy. Oh, boy.
Starting point is 00:46:49 Oh, boy. So, Sam, you get to go first. All right. And see if you could win this thing right now. Okay. He's on the money, off the record, and over the top. He's on the money, off the top. He's on the money. I know you're in this movie and I guess it's
Starting point is 00:47:11 The Adventures of Ford Fairlane. That is right. That's an amazing... I love that movie so much. It's so stupid. I love it. Yeah, I didn't mind that movie. I saw it.
Starting point is 00:47:34 That was a rave review. Yes. Yeah. That's probably one of the better reviews it got. Yeah. Didn't mind it. Can I... My favorite line,
Starting point is 00:47:44 my favorite Gilbert line in that movie, he goes, I met this girl, and she was a total pig. Anyway, I fucked her. It's amazing he had so many slow years after that. All right, so congratulations, Gilbert. You're killing it. slow years after that. Alright. So congratulations, Gilbert. You're killing it. But Sam won
Starting point is 00:48:10 that one, actually. So this next game... And I think it was in that movie where Andrew Dice Clay said, Hey, bitch! Bitch! What are you, power? What are you, power?
Starting point is 00:48:33 Homo? Ow! I was in bed with this broad. She didn't... I said, ow! I once in bed with this broad. She did... I'm an adult baby. Goo, goo, goo, goo. All right, we're going to play one more game. And this one, Sam gets to start us off, and then we'll move down the row. I'm going to sit this one out this time, because it's just in the interest of time.
Starting point is 00:49:17 But the game is called Last Man Stanton. And the way this game works is we're going to get an audience member that I've preselected is going to tell us the name of an actor or actress, and then everybody on stage has to take turns naming movies that person was in. If you can't think of one, you're out. But one time you can go to your lifeline. In the case of Gilbert, it's Spaceballs, Marlene Charlene. And Neil, you can go to Brian, In the case of Gilbert, it's Spaceballs. Marlene Charlene. And Neil, you can go to Brian.
Starting point is 00:49:49 And Joe can go to the person whose name tag he picked. And same with Sam. Just one time. And the person I preselected to help us out. Where is TV Pam? Hi. It's the lady with the shit name tag. Hi. It's the lady with the shit name tag.
Starting point is 00:50:10 But you still got picked anyway. I can eat those. I can't spray the Pam into my mouth. But her name is Pam, so it's accurate. Pam, what do you think we should play in the? What actor or actress should we use today? Actor, director, Ron Howard. Ron Howard. Wow.
Starting point is 00:50:31 So, films he's acted in or directed. Directed. Yeah. You ever worked with him, Gilbert? Or? No. Oh, too bad. Because that would help you probably.
Starting point is 00:50:44 Is that a tough one for you you think Ron Howard movies oh okay Apollo 13 not yet I'm just saying in general we have a problem oh we're starting with Sam.
Starting point is 00:51:06 All right. Well, I want to save that one for Gilbert, so I'll go with A Beautiful Mind. Yes. Starring the aforementioned Russell Crowe as a smart person. Joe? The Da Vinci Code. Yes.
Starting point is 00:51:22 Ed TV. Wow. Yep. Oh, shit. You guys are hitting the classics. Yep. So now you can just say Apollo 13. yes Ed TV wow yep oh shit you guys are hitting the classics yep so now you can just say
Starting point is 00:51:28 Apollo 13 Apollo 13 yeah nice Sam Angels and Demons you bastard I can't believe it got that far.
Starting point is 00:51:45 Yeah. Inferno. Inferno. That's all three of those stupid movies. I mean, I'm sure some people like them a lot. Tom Hanks is good. The Grinch. Neil?
Starting point is 00:51:59 The Grinch. What's the full title? The Grinch That Stole Christmas. More. What? You know how sometimes there'll be a possessive at the beginning of a title, like John Carpenter's The Thing? You could just go with another movie if you don't know it.
Starting point is 00:52:15 Here's a hint. It's not called Ron Howard's The Grinch Who Stole Christmas. Just go with a different movie. Oh, man. Now I'm going to blank on gonna blank on it wait you know who wrote you know who wrote the source material right but dr. Seuss is the Grinch this time but that's not the correct title what is it say oh he's right Oh Sam's right oh the wording is. Oh, I didn't hear the rest of it.
Starting point is 00:52:45 I just, after he got Dr. Seuss right, I was happy. How the Grinch Stole Christmas. That's good. Yeah. What'd you say? He just said the Grinch who stole Christmas. It's how the. Thanks, Sam.
Starting point is 00:52:58 You're welcome. I can't bring anybody new around here. These are your rules I'm enforcing. I know. I'm with Sam on this one. That was a lot of rope you just gave. Do you guys, are you really worried? You guys really think Neil's going to win this thing?
Starting point is 00:53:16 No. I don't know. Gilbert, you got another one? Yet another movie starring Michael Keaton Night Shift yes very good
Starting point is 00:53:32 and Kevin Costner is listed in the credits as frat boy number six yeah that's how I always think of him Rat Boy number six. Yeah. That's how I always think of him.
Starting point is 00:53:51 Sam? Cinderella Man. Yeah, that boxing thing. That boxing thing with Russell Crowe, again. Splash. Mm-hmm. Nobody said anything of his acting roles yet Saving those Neil
Starting point is 00:54:10 Oh, A Hard Day's Night The Beatles thing Is that name wrong again? These are the answers you're accepting? That's not what that's called. Did I say yes? No, that's not what that's called. But do you want to go to your lifeline, Neil?
Starting point is 00:54:33 I'll go to my lifeline, yeah. What do you got? In the Heart of the Sea. Oh, yes. In the Heart of the Sea. Yeah, that Moby Dick movie. I don't even know what that is. Yeah, it did not do well. really a Moby Dick movie yeah Chris
Starting point is 00:54:48 Hemsworth yeah I don't know why the Millennials passed on that one Gilbert you got another one you can go to Marlene Charlene if you need to there was a movie he starred in that was directed by, I think, or produced by Roger Corman. It was like something race, something... I know what you're talking about. Yeah. Do you want some help from Marlene Charlene?
Starting point is 00:55:26 Willow? Oh, Willow. I'll talking about. Yeah. Do you want some help from Marlene Charlene? Willow? Oh, Willow. I'll take that. Yeah. That's the one. Go with Willow. Yeah. Because they were racing to the Willow.
Starting point is 00:55:37 Yeah. Hurry up and get to Willow is the premise. Sam? Eight days a week. That's the name of the Beatles documentary. I enjoyed that on a plane. I also enjoyed it very much. Joe?
Starting point is 00:55:56 American Graffiti. Yes, there's an acting Ron Howard right there. That's the one I had teed up. It was? Yeah. Damn. So you think you're out, Neil? I think I'm out, yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:12 All right. Very good. You made a good effort. Gilbert, you got another one? I'm trying to remember that fucking race movie that he did with Roger Corman, and I can't. He acted in one race movie
Starting point is 00:56:33 in order to get to direct another race movie. But you don't know the title of either of those. No. All right, so you're out. Sam, more American graffiti. He's in that? A hundred percent. Yep. Alright, so you're out Sam More American Graffiti He's in that? A hundred percent It was just on TV and my god is that movie unwatchable
Starting point is 00:56:53 Alright Levine, you wanna fuck with me? Not really Frost Nixon Oh, that's a good one oh nice Sam yet again
Starting point is 00:57:09 back to the Russell Crowe a good year oh yeah that wine thing yeah did somebody say Cinderella man already yeah me I did
Starting point is 00:57:19 Sam said it oh oh the untitled Han Solo movie. Try again, Joe. No! Why does that not count? Because it doesn't even have a title! But he's directing it!
Starting point is 00:57:40 It has not come out yet, sir. It's not even finished. Why doesn't that count? It just doesn't out yet, sir. It is not yet a film. They just wrapped production. Why doesn't that count? It just doesn't. That should count. You know, you can't just list off things that are in development or, you know. Like, it's coming out in 2018 or some shit. It comes out in, like, next, like, May or something it comes out.
Starting point is 00:57:59 Yeah. I'll have you back then. We'll do this all over again. God damn it just go to your lifeline alright lifeline Rush
Starting point is 00:58:10 Rush the race car movie yes oh not the documentary about the band alright Sam
Starting point is 00:58:17 alright Mikey what do you got Grand Theft Auto that's the one that's the one he directed. Alright, hold on a second. We don't have much time.
Starting point is 00:58:31 I know. Let me just go deep for one second here. Untitled Russell Crowe film. I'm going to go with Def Jam's How to Be a Plumber. Did he by chance direct that? I can't think of anything else. Yes, and afterwards, Ron Howard jumped off a bridge
Starting point is 00:58:57 after he... Unfortunately, he survived. What? Just having some fun with Opie. Richie. Sam? Why? You got another one?
Starting point is 00:59:16 Is the movie you're thinking about called Death Race? Nope. Okay, that's right. It was Grand Theft Auto. I just need one more correct answer and you need to rub it in. Oh. Because also, I do not think he directed A Good Year. Really? Yep. It was Grand Theft Auto. I just need one more correct answer and you need to rub it in. Because also, I do not think he directed A Good Year. Really? Yep. That was a Ridley Scott movie.
Starting point is 00:59:32 Oh, shit. So you've got to prove yourself right here and now. Because I went first, I've already said more than anyone else, but I'll see if I can keep digging. Good Christ. What was that one he did? Oh, Parenthood.
Starting point is 00:59:48 There you go. Thank you. And the other car race movie that he starred in was called Eat My Dust. Ah, all right. Eat My Dust. Oh, God. Did he direct Always with Tom Cruise? No, that was Spielberg.
Starting point is 01:00:04 Oh, okay. Oh, wait, no. Always was the firefighting movie with Holly Hunter. Wasn't Always Richard Dreyfuss and John Goodman? Yeah. What's the Tom Cruise movie with Nicole Kidman? Days of Thunder. Far and Away.
Starting point is 01:00:19 Eyes Wide Shut. Did he direct Far and Away? BMX Bandits. Yeah, no, Far and Away. Far and Away Far and Away is another Ron Howard movie well great job Sam is our winner
Starting point is 01:00:28 everybody thank you come get your prizes the person Sam was playing for hey man congratulations and don't forget to hit these guys up for Sam was playing for. Hey, man. Congratulations.
Starting point is 01:00:46 And don't forget to hit these guys up for, uh... Oh, shit. That could've really hurt that guy. That's two pounds of gummy bears. Take these.
Starting point is 01:01:00 All right, Sam. You got any plugs? Hey, what are you doing tomorrow night, Sam? Uh, nothing. You want to come back as the defending champion? Sure, duh.
Starting point is 01:01:06 Alright. Find me on Twitter and Instagram, at Sam Levine, S-A-M-M-L-E-V-I-N-E. That's all I got for now. Thanks, Mr. Levine. My pleasure. Joe DeRosa, promote yourself. I'd like to plug my two podcasts, the horror movie podcast that Pat Walsh and myself host
Starting point is 01:01:28 called We'll See You in Hell on HeadGum, and Kurt Braunohler and I host the podcast about adult friendship called Emotional Hangs on Feral Audio. I want to plug my movie Gilbert about Gilbert Gottfried. It comes out November 3rd. IFC Center in New York. Tell all your friends to go.
Starting point is 01:01:47 I'm Neil P. Berkley. He's at real Gilbert Gottfried. Please go see it. Yes, and GilbertGottfried.com, and I think Gilbert Movie is the website. Add Gilbert Movie, yes. And since we've already plugged Gilbert, another Gilbert Gottfried's's amazing colossal podcast and um you got one more joke to leave us with uh okay a guy's in bed with a girl. He says, roll over so I can fuck you in the ass.
Starting point is 01:02:27 And the girl says, don't you think you're being a bit presumptuous? And he goes, don't you think presumptuous is a big word for a three-year-old? Sometimes we'll probably edit that one out but um i'm gonna be at the atlanta variety theater their variety theater in atlanta next sunday october 15th at 4 20 and um thanks again to all of my guests. Let's hear it for them. Sam Levine, Joe DeRosa, Neil Berkley, and Gilbert Gottfried. Hang on a second. Isn't Matt over there? Like, there's a specific cue.
Starting point is 01:03:22 As always, and thank you to the Biltmore Hotel and LA Podfest and all of you guys for coming to LA Podfest and as always dropping your keys down an elevator shaft is a shithead Hollywood creepers are a shithead
Starting point is 01:03:41 they list a bunch of names I'm not going to get into but I think they are all creeps and this may be being the are a shithead. They list a bunch of names I'm not gonna get into. But I think they are all creeps. And this maybe being the last Podfest is a sad, sad shithead. Hit it.
Starting point is 01:03:57 Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold is viewing crowd with spades in foggy. There's no room in his heart for you. Cause the, the, boobies!

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