Doug Loves Movies - Rental Car V
Episode Date: October 30, 2011Graham Elwood joins Doug in a rental car to discuss Peoria, weirdos from Peoria, and movies. And Build-A-Title will be played. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California ...Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, squeaky babies, sticky seeds with 50 acid popper kernels in his teeth.
There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug Loves Movies!
Hey everybody, my name is Doug and I love movies.
This is Doug Loves Movies, coming to you yet again from a rental car.
I believe this is rental car
ep number five what kind of car is this doug we're driving in a lovely nissan versa
which is their smallest cheapest most compact car it's fine it's not it's not great it's all right
all right it's all right everybody all right That's a new slogan for them.
It's alright. It'll work.
It gets the job done.
It's Sunday, October 30th, 2 Oceans 11.
My guest, who you've already heard from, is comedian, author, sword enthusiast, Graham Elwood.
We're driving from San Francisco to Sacramento I think right now
we're in the Vallejo area
yes we are we're on the 80 east
just got out of the bay
crossed our last bridge paid our last toll
five bucks to get across
that bridge son of a bitch
I was thinking $250
Friday night we did a show at the Neptune Theater in Seattle
where Graham had to deal with a drunk dude from Peoria.
That guy, the middle of my set,
I'd already done the stuff about Peoria,
just walks up to the stage and he was like,
yeah, I'm from Peoria, man, so we need to have a date.
Talk about it.
I was like, and then he just wandered off it was the
weirdest creepiest thing and then i made fun of him for 10 minutes so that was gold then we played
the letter malton game first contestant to come up on stage was named celia and she got graham's
attention with a name tag that said celia hearts cocks yeah i shouldn't have fallen for that i'm
sorry it was a lot of effort put into that name there's a lot of people that had really cool That's Celia Hartz-Cox. Yeah, I shouldn't have fallen for that. I'm sorry.
It was a lot of effort put into that name.
There's a lot of people that had really cool costumes.
She lost on the In Theaters Now category because she didn't know...
I guess she didn't know that there's a movie in theaters now
that has Philip Seymour Hoffman and Evan Rachel Wood in it.
Like, I could see her guessing Moneyball
after hearing Philip Seymour Hoffman,
but she didn't even guess that.
She just didn't know, you know.
She just, I think she hearts Cox more than movies.
She just is really into Cox.
So the answer was Eyes of March, of course.
Then we brought to the stage Kevin, who...
He was dressed as Bacon.
As a whole slice, his whole costume was a big slice of bacon with his head coming through one end and like a overhang on the top,
which is good for Seattle, walk around in the rain dressed as Bacon, you don't get your head wet.
Yeah, Baconbrella, fella, hella.
And he beat Graham on the new movies category, which is movies with the word new in the title
and the reason he had the advantage
on that one is because Graham
pays no attention to the
Twilight films. I pay
a little attention to them but not
much either. And so the answer was
the Twilight movie that was called New
Moon. Yeah.
Never in a million years would I ever have gotten
that. Because you're reading all these
names and i'm like what who are they what movie were they in everyone the audience knew and i was
like i had no idea yeah and then the only other costume i saw in the crowd at the neptune was
somebody dressed as a witch yeah or that that could have just been a lady with bad taste in hats
sure and then yesterday afternoon we did a 420 matinee at the Punchline in San Francisco.
Lots of creative costumes at that show.
Can you remember any of the ones that weren't picked?
One guy was dressed as Nicolas Cage from Raising Arizona,
and his girlfriend was dressed as a cop, so it was her and Holly Hunter.
It was awesome.
girlfriend was dressed as a cop so it was her and holly hunter it was awesome um then there was a guy dressed as scotty from the oh yeah from the star wars films no star trek god damn it you
fucking idiot they're too different how could you yeah that was funny that was uh yeah so he was
from scotty from the the david ab. David Abrams? Did I say that right?
And, um.
No.
No, it's not.
It's, uh.
What's his first name?
Why am I blanking on his name?
Ha, ha, ha.
Rick.
Stanny.
Chet.
Chet Abrams.
That's so funny.
Why can't, I can't think of it either.
I know, now it's like.
Abrams.
Abrams.
Let's just call him Abrams. Abrams. Abrams. Abrams. Let's just call him Abrams.
Abrams. Abrams from Bad Robot.
Yeah, the Bad Robot Abrams.
The Lost Abrams.
Yeah.
This is driving me.
Joey Abrams.
Dano Abrams.
Oh, God.
This is crazy.
That's so bizarre that we can't remember his name.
Anyway.
I cannot handle this.
Oh, because it's not, it cannot handle this.
Oh, because it's initials, J.J. Abrams.
J.J. Abrams, you son of a bitch.
That's not a real name.
Yeah, so he was dressed as Scotty from the J.J. Abrams Star Trek, which was cool.
And then right next to him was a girl in the, what was that, something in the Worlds of Tomorrow.
Sky Captain in the Worlds of Tomorrow.
And then, what was the girl, the girl with the whale on the table?
I forgot already again.
I thought it was Big Fish.
Big Fish.
I thought it was Go Fish, the lesbian movie from the 90s.
God, now I can't remember.
It was a great costume, though.
Yeah, anyway, there was lots of good costumes.
And then the first dude that you picked from the crowd was named Corey.
Wasn't so much a movie costume as it was just a tribute to weed, basically.
Well, yeah, he had a big bag of weed around his neck.
Giant bag of weed.
Giant bag of weed around his neck.
And then he carved, he made a medical marijuana card from the state of Denver with your picture as the seal of the great state of Denver.
And then he cut out the box where his photo would be and he held up his, he helped put his face into it.
Yeah, he stuck his face through the hole.
And so he was basically a walking bag of weed and a medical marijuana card all in one.
Wow, so he was the state of Denver with a palm strike bandana.
So he had hit like every possible way that you and I would want.
Yeah, it was a massive suck up and it worked.
It totally worked.
And he picked girls, man.
And with just three names, one of which was Shannon Doherty,
he was able to determine that the answer was girls just want to have fun.
With Holly Gagne, who was one of my acting teachers when I first moved to Los Angeles.
So you would have gotten it right if you had heard that name?
Yeah, I think so.
Because, you know, how many movies has she been in?
She's been in not many, but in the end...
Especially with the word girls in the title.
Yeah, yeah.
Or man.
Yeah.
So yeah, it was Girls Just Want to Have Fun, Man.
And... Jeff Tate. I just heard the word girls in the title. Yeah, yeah. Poor man. Yeah. So yeah, it was Girls Just Want to Have Fun, Man. And.
Jeff Tate.
Since it ended so quickly, we brought another contestant on stage.
Her name was Jen, and she was dressed as Hit Girl.
Yeah.
Which is a great way to appeal to both of us, because we love kick-ass.
She picked the Richard Dreyfuss category, because it was his birth. I included the Richard Dreyfuss category Because it was his birth
I included the Richard Dreyfuss category
Because it was his birthday
And I think you got
Three names
Yeah
Yeah, Graham got three names
And
How did
What gave it away?
How did you figure it out?
Well, you said 1995
I believe or 96
I think it was 95
And you said Three i believe we're 96 i think it was 95 and you said um
three and a half stars you said that one of the things was like uh leonard malton said
richard dreyfus was like flawless or perfect or something like that and i was like okay
and i was racking my brain for that time period and then one of the names you read i was like oh
i can't remember what name but i was was like, I know what this is.
And I said, Mr. Holland's Opus.
I dropped the mic and I walked off stage in victory.
That's right.
You showed Hit Girl what's what.
That's right, Hit Girl.
Now we're driving to Sacramento to do a 420 show at the Punchline in Sacramento, which is always, always a good time.
which is always a good time at Joel Bong
enjoyed the rental car
number 4 and
even tweeted a quote he wrote
I think it was you that said it
Graham good old Alan Tudyx
who doesn't love Alan Tudyx
ladies and gentlemen on the drive to Sacramento
Alan Tudyx
so
don't forget that if you're a fan of Graham Elwood and you buy a ticket for the Weezer Cruise,
to let us know that Graham is who you vote for to be one of my friends who joined a couple members of Weezer and I
for a Douglas Movies taping on the Weezer Cruise. Weezercruise.com for more details.
And you can play the Leonard Maltin game against Graham
on November 12th at the Orpheum in Flagstaff.
Stand-up live in Phoenix on November 13th.
San Jose Improv November 20th at 420.
And the Tipsy Crow on the night before Thanksgiving
in San Diego on November 23rd.
They're all listed, hopefully, at douglasmovies.com.
Neither Graham nor I have seen a movie since the last rental car show because we've been busy doing stuff.
Yep, but you're doing shows and traveling.
Yeah, so skip over the What Have You Seen Lately and go right to Build a Title.
Shall we play a game?
We're driving from San Francisco, where I should mention I will be performing once again at the Punchline on December 27th and the 28th.
Two shows each night, and I'm going to attempt to do four different shows, pulling material from the entirety of my career and all four of my albums.
So that's going to be tricky and might be fun to watch. So if you want to come to more
than one show and have more than one chance to play the Leonard Maltin game against Dan
Gabriel, then come check us out. I'm going to make him do different material every show
too. I don't know if I can make him, but I'm going to ask him nicely.
So, like I said, San Francisco is where we just came from,
so let's play build a title with some films that are set in San Francisco.
This first one I picked, I was not aware that San Francisco was in it because I haven't seen the film, but maybe Graham can confirm because he has.
It's called Hereafter, directed by Clint Eastwood.
Yeah, yeah. Matt Damon is
in San Francisco.
So there's a lot of it's in San Francisco, and some
of it's shot in France and stuff like that. But there's a good
chunk of it in San Francisco.
Perfect. Let's start with that.
Hereafter.
Ends with here, starts with after.
After Hours.
Bam. I pre-guessed that one.
Pre-guessed, that was a pre-guess.
Doug Benson is a build-a-title pre-cog.
Hours, hours, hours, mine and yours.
Damn, that might be a stopper on that end already
So I'm going to go with my other pre-guess
And say
Wish you were here
After hours
Wish you were here
Yeah
So that's the end and wish
And begin
With hours Hours So it has to end in wish. And begin with hours.
Hours.
That's a tough one.
Hours in the day.
That's not a thing.
That was definitely not a thing.
Hours.
Hours. Ours.
Ours.
Well, according to Leonard Maltin, the only movie with ours in the title as the first word is the hours.
So unless we can think of some clever word that sounds like hours.
Let's see if any movies start with the word
O-U-R-S, hours.
Nope. Not according
to Leonard anyway.
Okay, so. So we got
something that ends in wish. Or maybe this one's
done already. I've already got, I've got a couple other
movies we can do, yeah. Wish, let's see.
Wasn't there a movie called The Big Wish?
Like a kid's movie?
Oh, I think you're right.
I think you're right on that one.
Let's see.
Sure sounds like something that would happen.
According to Leonard, it isn't.
But I'm going to try IMDb because sometimes when you plug a movie into Leonard's app,
for whatever reason, it doesn't...
It gets all squirrely.
It doesn't get you there.
Big wish.
Come down.
IMDb is searching.
In the meantime, I'll say that I am going to be on an episode of Comedy Film Nerds coming up soon.
Right, Graham?
Hello, yes.
It's going to be a, I think we're going to go holiday movie themed episode.
Oh, that'll be fun.
I love to talk about holiday movies.
And I think we'll probably have Chris and I battling each other in a Leonard Maltin Royale,
which we've done in the past.
Okay, according to
IMDB,
there's the big wash
of 1968,
there's the biggest wish,
but that's a short film,
and of course there's Big Fish.
So...
Yeah, don't know what that is. so we have an incredibly short build the title
hassle us on twitter if you've got something that begins in hours or ends in wish
but for now we just have wish you were here after hours which is a good it's a good title. It's about a guy who wants to hook up.
So somebody should make that.
Make that movie.
So let's go with another film set in San Francisco.
It starred Gene Wilder and Kelly LeBrock from 1984.
It's called Woman in Red.
Yeah.
She's damn sexy in that one.
And Gene Wilder's obsessed with her and does a lot of weird stuff.
At one point he ends up out on the ledge
of a building.
Naked, I think.
I think you get to see some side
boob with
Kelly LeBrock in there, so that's exciting.
I remember it being kind of a
pretty spicy movie.
It was like PG-13, though, or something.
And all about infidelity.
Uh, Woman in Reds?
Or...
You son of a bitch.
You were thinking Red State.
Or, yeah, but Reds, The Trouble with the Reds is then what's going to start with Reds?
Well, then I could go Woman in Red State.
All right.
If we were playing it without a panel of people, I would do that to kill someone.
Yeah, yeah, if you're trying to get somebody knocked out, then that's a smart play, because Reds, I don't think there's anything that starts with Reds.
Reds, I don't think there's anything that starts with reds. Reds, no.
So, all right, we've got woman in red state, so then I'll add of play, state of play.
So now you need something that begins with play or ends in woman.
Um, woman.
Um, blank woman.
Blank woman Blank Woman
there's gotta be
there's gotta be a thousand
movies that end in one
you'd think so
I thought of one
but I didn't
I didn't think really hard
Attack of the 50 Foot Woman
oh I love it
Attack
of the 50
Foot
Woman
I was thinking of An unmarried woman.
Oh, that's not a bad one.
It's Joey Flayberg.
All right, attack of the 50-foot woman in red, state of play.
Attack.
Damn, Mars attacks doesn't work.
Attack.
Attack. Probably, there's probably been something called heart
attack, but I can't, I can't confirm. And I can't tell you who's in it, so that's not
fair. Maybe there wasn't anything called heart attack. Blank attack.
Panic attack.
You have to give up on that side.
And then something I always end up going for when the word play comes up is playing with fire.
Oh, cool.
That one comes up a lot. This game sort of, this game sort of becomes like Scrabble,
where you have certain go-tos that are very helpful.
All right, so we've got Attack of the 50-Foot Woman in Red State of Playing with Fire.
Playing with Fire Starter.
Starter.
Strawberry moment.
Yeah, see, this is where I think we've been down this exact road before,
because then Star Terminator.
But I'll make it easy for you.
I'll go Star Terminator 2 Judgment Day.
Okay.
Day of the Jackal.
Nice.
Might be a stopper.
Yeah, there's not a lot of jackals.
Day of the Jackal.
All Jackal. All.
All jackal.
All.
I guess you can do something
if he gets the word all.
All the president's men.
Jack all the president's men.
All.
Which sounds dirty.
I'm going to jack all the president's men.
So we've got Attack of the 50-foot woman in red,
State of Playing with Fire,
Start, Terminator 2,
Judgment Day of the Jack,
all of the president's men.
Men of Honor.
The Cuba Gooding Jr. Robert De Niro diving movie.
Oh, yes. It was the sequel to Radio, wasn't it? The Cuba Gooding Jr. Robert De Niro diving movie Oh yes
It was the
It was the sequel to Radio wasn't it
Yes it was
Radio's all grown up
He joins the Navy
Um
Honor
Honor System
Honor
I don't think there's anything that starts with honor. Honor. Honor. Honor. Honor.
Do you have anything, any ideas? Because I think that's a stopper for me, I think.
And I still can't come up with anything that ends in attack.
Or that.
Ah!
This is going to chit-chat with your hide, but I'm going to do it anyway.
So obvious. The cat in the hat-tack
Hat-tack of the 50-foot woman
Cat in the hat-tack of the 50-foot woman
In red state of playing
With Firestar Terminator to Judgment Day
of the Jackal of the President's
Men of Honor.
That is so flimsy.
Now you need something that ends with
cat.
Cat or honor.
Oh, honorable
discharge. Oh, dude.
Most of my discharges are honorable.
Oh, yeah, boom.
Who is in honorable discharge?
Oh, fuck.
Isn't that Samuel Jackson and Tommy Lee Jones, I believe?
That's what it was called?
Let's look that up.
Let's look it up.
Because I don't know about that man I mean it sounds like a perfectly generic
I'm getting confused with like an 80's Vietnam
I think you're thinking of honorary something
Honorary
I know you're right
About the Sam
Wasn't that called like Rules of Engagement
Oh maybe that's right that was
That was called
The Honorable Discharge I think was a Vietnam War movie
In the 80's like a direct to video one
Like Frankl
Tex Cobb, or something like
that.
Wow, okay.
I'm going to have to go to IMDb for that, because Leonard doesn't get too deep into
the direct-to-video, I don't think.
So let's see what IMDb has to say about it.
Honorable.
They're acting like there's nothing called honorable.
Let's see if I had discharge.
Oh, wait.
You wait.
Isn't there the Honor Student, which is about the girl who's the prostitute at night?
There's a Honor Student during the day and a prostitute at night.
That's a movie?
Yeah.
Came out in theaters?
Yeah.
There's Dishonorable Discharge from 1957.
There's Certain Honorable Men from 68.
And that's really all they got on the IMDb.
And I'm not going to take the time
to look up that other thing you just mentioned.
This isn't the Listen to Doug Look Stuff Up show.
Oh, look, there's a Chevy.
Let's keep driving.
And a Red Roof Inn.
And an O'Reilly's.
So, I'm sure there's something that we could add to Honorable.
And I'm sure there's a movie that ends in cat, right?
Black Cat?
Black Cat.
Is that a movie?
Or That Darn Cat?
That Darn Cat.
Yep.
So we've got Darn and Honor.
No, we've got That.
I don't know if there's anything in the movie that ends in That.
She's All That?
Yep.
Yeah, okay.
Spike Lee.
No, what's one that ends in she's?
She is.
Has there ever been a movie
that ends with the word she?
That would be a really awkward title.
That's what she is.
Oh, look at she.
Here goes she.
Oh.
She, she, she.
Chihuahua. Chihuahua.
Chihuahua.
River of the hills, Chihuahua.
River of the hills, she's, she's Chihuahua.
All right, well, this is a ridiculously long title.
Let's keep it.
I like to keep the car episodes, the mini episodes.
I like to keep them mini.
So let's wrap this one on.
She's all that dart cat in the hat.
Tack of the 50
Foot Woman in Red State of Playing
with Fire's Dark
Terminator 2
Judgment Day of the Jackal
The President's Men
of Honor
Starring Radio
That is not
bad, my friend. That was good business.
Yeah.
You got any plugs?
yeah of course if people want autographed copies of Potty Mouth
they are available at comedyfilmnerds.com
and
you know any of my
tour dates
comedy film nerds
if you want to download Lafganistan
pay what you think is fair download
you can do all of that at
GrahamElwood.com
Thursday, November 3rd
I'll be at Go Bananas in Cincy
Great club. You have a chance
there to play the Leonard Mullen game against
David Huntsberger
and then Saturday, November 5th, I'm going to do
a Douglas Movies taping at the Acme Comedy
Club in Minneapolis
slash St. Paul Twin Cities
at 4.20 in the afternoon. Tickets are going fast for that. I'll have at least three special
guests on that show. Should be a lot of fun. So it's part of Acme's, what is it, their
35th anniversary? Yeah, 25.
25, 30.
I should know that.
It's some big anniversary for them, so they're having shows all weekend.
I'm in a show there that night at 8 o'clock that's already sold out with a few other headliners that have worked that club.
So it should be a lot of fun there that whole weekend,
so come by and celebrate Acme's something-something anniversary.
celebrate ACME's something something anniversary
and
as always
I didn't pick a shithead. Do you have a shithead, Graham?
Oh, I have a shithead.
Who's your shithead in your life
right now?
I got a lot of them.
Too many to choose from.
So many shitheads.
Yeah.
Let me see.
What else did we talk about today
that we could call a shithead?
Oh, I know.
Okay, what?
Fucking $5 toll is a shithead.
Oh, I like that.
As always, $5 bridge toll is a shithead.
Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie.
Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky.
There's no room in his heart for you.
Cause Doug loves movies.