Doug Loves Movies - Rich Sommer, DC Pierson, and "Mark Wahlberg" Guest
Episode Date: October 21, 2014Doug welcomes actor Rich Sommer, comedian DC Pierson, and former rapper "Mark Wahlberg" to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://ar...t19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming babies, 50 seats with 50 as a pop-up,
Colonel in his seat, there's still not more that he won't see,
but Doug loves movies!
Hey everybody, my name's Doug and I love movies.
Hey, Doug love movies!
Coming to you from the UCB Theater in LA at 7pm sharp on Tuesday, October 21st, 2014, Wolf blah blah blah.
I've got some great Leonard Maldon game players that are going to come out here right now so I just want to get right to it
quickly
I'm doing stand up at Festival Supreme
this Saturday at the Shrine Auditorium
here in Los Angeles
get there early because my set is at 520
yeah
they told me your set is at 520
I was like so clever
they didn't even think about it I'm sure They told me, your set is at 520. I was like, so clever.
They didn't even think about it, I'm sure.
San Francisco.
Doug loves scary movies.
Comes to Cobb's Comedy Club this Thursday.
No, the next Thursday.
Week from Thursday on October 30th.
Costumes encouraged.
And on Saturday, November 1st, I'm doing stand-up at the Sacramento Punchline at 420.
And costumes are not encouraged.
But also not discouraged.
I mean, it is still Halloween weekend, I guess,
so I don't want to be a complete killjoy.
Douglovesmovies.com, FOMO Info.
From the corrections department, Annie McDowell is in multiplicity,
not Mary Steenberg as we were talking about the other day.
And the prize bag includes some wondrous items.
But I'll tell you, I don't know.
There's a lot of exciting things in here.
Of course, we've got a Doug Loves Movies T-shirt.
But we also have, they're in here somewhere.
I don't want to dig around for them.
Two tickets to Festival Supreme this Saturday.
Yeah.
And a Gateway Doug 2, Forced Fun,
and of course, Bacon Bowl.
That's why I was saying it's a tough choice.
I don't know what's a better prize,
the Bacon Bowl or the Festival Supreme tickets.
We've also got, he's not
here tonight, but he was on Getting Doug
With High and he brought this for me to give
away. It's Shooter
Jennings,
whatever you call this thing.
It's an album.
It's on vinyl. And it's
an EP, right?
It's an EP. And it's a tribute to
George Jones, I believe. It's called
Don't Wait Up.
Oh, there's a book in here.
Somebody was nice enough to bring
the Treehouse of Terror
I don't know
which one it was, but
the 14th season of
The Simpsons. Did you guys see Treehouse of Terror?
This new one?
That Stanley Kubrick shit was crazy.
Let's get these guys out here.
Please give a big warm welcome to Rich Sommer, D.C. Pearson, and Mark Wahlberg.
Always with the extra flourish when you come out on stage.
It's like you're a trained theater actor or something.
I am, dude.
Did you see Invincible?
Yes.
I really played football in that movie.
Well, you were quite the rock star in Rockstar.
I gotta give you that.
I brought something extra.
What is it?
Oh, you're gonna love it.
Okay.
It's a red shirt.
Oh, you're gonna love it.
You're gonna be so happy when you see it.
Who needs a woman when you have a good hand?
Am I right?
Plaza Hotel, Las Vegas
that is a nice shirt
you got that when we were in Vegas
I did and I held onto it for a special occasion
but instead I'm here
fair enough
Rich Sommer is here you guys
back on the show again
yes
always a pleasure to have him
I am so happy to be here,
but I was wondering when I was driving here
why you or I ever accept the idea of me being here,
because I am so fucking bad at this game.
I know, but you want to win so badly.
I'm more than anything.
And you understand it.
Like, understanding it is like heaven for me as host, because I get confused.
So if my guests don't know what the fuck's going on, we're all fucked.
We're all going down together.
So that's why I put together a panel like this and a really exciting Leonard Maltin game.
I got some new categories I'm very excited about.
And yeah, so we're going to do it up tonight.
But you also brought for the prize bag.
I did.
In addition to the Simpsons thing, you also brought the final season part one.
That's right.
It came out today.
Of Mad Men, yeah.
And when does Mad Men pick up again?
Sometime in the spring, like March-ish, I think.
There's no set date yet.
It's so far from now.
Yeah.
I've got so much to look forward to in March.
What's really cool about that DVD, by the way,
is the MSRP on that is the same as it is for a full season.
And that's only half as many episodes.
So you know that each episode is twice as valuable.
Okay.
I buy it. And DC Pearson is here, you guys. Hey, guys. valuable. Okay.
I buy it.
And D.C. Pearson is here,
you guys.
Star of Captain America,
The Winter Soldier.
Star.
Dude, you were great in that, by the way.
Oh, thanks, Mark. I appreciate it. I was like, look at this dude and his beard.
Thanks, dude. Do you pay to see movies?
Oh, no, not at all. No, no, no.
I have an old
hand-wound projector
that Donnie uses
in the garage.
So he's cranking away
and I'm just watching you
and I'm like,
oh my God,
I love that beard.
I'm a big beard guy.
You see Perfect Storm?
Obviously.
I thought you said
you're a big beer guy.
What's that?
It's like beer?
That's what I thought you said.'re a big beer guy. What's that? It's like beer? That's what I thought you said.
Too many carbs, bro.
And DC brought a copy now in softback.
Is that what they call it?
I think so.
Softback, softcover. All of them sounds like ways to get STDs.
But yeah, something.
It's a softcover, I think.
All right. You wrote a book? Yeah, I have two books, something. It's a soft cover, I think. Alright. You wrote a book?
Yeah, I have two books, Mark. It's called Howl.
Well, I wrote it. I sat down for a long time, and I
wrote a draft. It's called Crap Kingdom,
so also he's basically saying
say whatever you want about it.
It's called Crap Kingdom.
I think it looks fucking dope. It's on a shitter.
Yeah, and it's on a shitter. Yeah.
And it's available in soft.
Soft cover.
Soft style.
Paperback.
Paperback.
Yeah, exactly.
But it doesn't feel.
Why couldn't I think
of that word?
It's so much nicer
than a paperback though.
Yeah, it's not.
Paperback, I think of
like something you would
get in the airport.
It's like the new
Clive Cussler novel
about like a guy
who's not quite
Indiana Jones
finds like the
fourth best
Aztec artifact.
So let's go with soft cover.
Why not?
Also, can I say about the prize bag
when I was backstage?
I thought you took this wonderful pause
because you were like,
also, we have really amazing,
we have two tickets,
and I was hoping they were going to be
Two Paradise.
And that, who is that?
Richard Marks was going to be on the show?
Who sings Two Paradise?
Eddie Money, bro.
Eddie Money?
Okay, yeah. Yeah, he had that Geico Marks is going to be on the show? Who sings Two Tickets? Eddie Money, bro. Eddie Money? Okay, yeah.
Yeah, he had that Geico commercial
where he was a travel agent
and he was singing that.
That was the saddest thing I've ever seen.
And you spend a lot of time with Donnie.
I know.
Well, I make Donnie watch it.
I'm like, do you want to get to this level?
But Mark, you do commercials, right?
Don't you do commercials in Boston?
You do some local cable company commercials?
I'll do cable crew.
There's a guy I grew up with who has his own break shop.
I'll do that for him.
I recently just did some community service back in Boston.
Yeah, I try to keep things tight back there.
What do you say in the break shop thing?
Are you on camera saying,
it's me, Mark Wahlberg, and this is how I feel about this break shop?
Oh, I haven't introduced myself
in 17 years.
You say like,
this thing's not a tramp.
So what do you say?
Like, how does the commercial go?
I go out like this.
Stop.
Wouldn't you hate
if you couldn't?
wouldn't you hate if you couldn't?
Oh, that's it?
Then somebody else comes in and does the rest of the thing? Oh, no.
And then I'm like,
come on down to Mike and Dean's Break Shop
here in Dorchester.
We're going to take care of you good.
If you don't like us,
you're not feeling the good vibrations.
You know, Mark,
for my birthday in eighth grade grade this is absolutely true i asked for tickets to see you in the funky bunch on valentine's day um and i took my best friend uh matt and we went
and saw you it's very romantic uh yeah well we uh realized pretty quickly upon entering the venue that we weren't entirely within the demographic that you were aiming for.
Right.
It's two eighth grade males.
Would it change your life?
A little bit.
How so?
Did you get in a fight?
No, I did.
I touched a condom for the first time in my life.
What?
These balloons kept getting hit down.
I was like, oh, look at that.
And I grabbed one.
I was like, the balloon, it feels like it's way more give than a balloon.
And then I saw the little nub, and my friend Matt was like, oh, my God, I think that's a condom.
And I was like, ugh.
And it was a whole.
You know what?
What's that?
You're welcome.
Thank you.
Changed everything.
Changed everything, Mark.
All right. This is part of the show where I say, let the games
begin!
Getting right to it.
I'm so excited. I'm excited for
tonight's games. This also might be a really short episode.
If one of you guys
runs away with it. So, pace yourselves.
I've been stretching. Alright.
But first, gentlemen,
we need you to pick your name tags from this dazzling display of six or seven items that are being held up in the air.
Let's do it.
We've got some creative ones.
Those are usually from out of town.
I'm a girl.
You guys are a mom.
Okay.
The Walking Ted right over there.
That's a great one for you because Because you're in Ted, remember?
Remember, Rich, the movie Ted, when you did that?
We'll be right back.
And we're back.
Who are you playing for, DC?
I am playing for a guy I can only assume his name is either Jake or Jill.
Because he has the movie Jack and Jill from Adam Sandler.
And his face is on a Blu-ray cover.
And, you know, he's really supporting physical media
and I appreciate that.
Nice. Who do you got, Rich?
I have Mikey, an officer
and a gentle Mikey and it says
Mikey, yay, hooray
and also on the back is a tip to whomever
Hey, whoa, yo, I know
what the fuck I'm doing.
I'm pointing out the fact that you said,
don't read this out loud on the back.
That's all I was going to say.
I can't read that part out loud either?
Jesus Christ, Mikey.
Can I get...
I'll do this one anyway.
And who are you playing for, Mark?
This person went all out.
He made a bottle.
It says Jack Daniels.
Mark? This person went all out.
He made a bottle. It says Jack Daniels.
So his name is Jack or Daniels?
Maybe he's pluralized.
Number seven?
Oh, no. I'm sorry. His name is Sour Mash.
Garrett. They did the mash.
They did the sour mash.
Yes.
Let's play to determine who goes first today. mash. They did the sour mash. Yes.
Let's play, to determine who goes first today,
let's play a round of how much
did this shit make.
There's a picture you guys on the panel
might be familiar with called The Happening.
Yeah.
I want to know how
much that movie made, according to
Box Office Mojo, during its entire
domestic run,
without going over Price is Right style.
And I want you to guess first, Mark,
because you probably have the most inside information on how...
I mean, do you pay attention to the box office of your films?
Do you know pretty much what they all made?
No.
Not unless I own a part of it or I produced it.
So in this case,
Zoe was in it.
Tends to bring things down.
Yeah, like 300 days of summer,
that really tanked because of her.
Mm-hmm.
500 days.
It just really flew by for me.
She was in that horror movie, Elf,
about a giant man who terrorizes people in New York City.
You know what?
I'm going to go with $61 million.
Oh, boy.
All right.
$61 million. So that's. All right. $61 million.
Not one of your bigger hits.
No.
No.
All right, DC, what do you think?
I am going to guess $34 million.
Okay.
And Rich?
$1.
$1.
I guarantee it made more than that.
No, but you know how it works.
Yeah, I do.
It sold one ticket
at hyper bargain prices.
You know, I guess we should have
known this going in, then Mark would be
correct. It made
$64.5 million.
I told you.
Wow.
Yes, you only missed it by a few mil.
We're going to do this, Jack Daniel.
All right, this is really happening.
Now, Mark, did you know the sort of M. Night Shyamalan twist of that movie when you were making it?
I thought the twist is that I was playing a math teacher.
I was like, I'm on board.
We're gonna trick these motherfuckers.
A lot of people don't know this,
so even though I was no part of law enforcement
in that movie,
the whole film, I still carried a gun.
I had it on the whole time.
I could have killed that old lady in that final scene.
Did I?
Check it out.
It's on Blu-ray right now.
Did I? Check it out. It's on Blu-ray right now.
Do you think maybe that movie ever had a renaissance
and people will appreciate it?
I hope so, because
to me, the plant was talking back.
And if I'm going to put
that level of fucking work in, it should be appreciated.
You mean you were imagining
the plants were're talking about?
No, that fucking plant said shit to me.
He learned plant language.
And don't forget that you can learn Dothraki from Game of Thrones
if you pay attention to the ad in this show.
Let's start with you, Mark,
because you just killed that other thing.
And you get to pick a category, and then we'll go to Rich and then DC.
First person to two points is going to be our winner.
And I really have allotted a lot of time for this, because I think it's going to be an exciting match between the three of you.
How did you get so good at this, Mark?
I mean, you seem like you'd be too busy to know so much about...
Same way you, bro.
Plane rides.
Watch a ton of fucking movies on the plane.
Let me ask you guys a quick question.
Can you name a movie where Dwayne the Rock Johnson dies?
Scorpion King.
Really?
Mm-hmm.
Wasn't that supposed to be like weren't they hoping for like a franchise
I don't know that's acting people
I don't know
that was free
that was free
oh my god we just got some free acting
y'all
in your face
doesn't he die in Panic Game
no he gets arrested spoiler alert like you haven't seen it Protecting me, y'all. Yeah. In your face. Doesn't he die in pain again?
No, he gets arrested.
Yeah. Spoiler alert.
Yeah.
Like you haven't seen it.
I saw pain, but I stopped when it got to me.
You came before the gain?
I got out before gain.
Oh, I put a lot of gain in for that movie.
I didn't want anybody to gain.
All right.
All those horrible characters.
We beat the shit out of Monk.
the shit out of Monk.
It's like if you,
Mark Wahlberg, in that movie,
that was like you were the mentality of the guy that fucked with Mark Wahlberg,
the sweet young man in Boogie Nights.
Yeah, it's kind of like full circle when you put it that way.
Yeah, really think about it.
It's shaped like a Wahlburger, really
Yeah, dude
Have you been?
No
Check it out
Come on down to Wahlburgers
Do you like meat in your mouth?
Then you'll love Boogie Nights and Wahlburgers
That's free, too
A lot of freebies tonight
You get to pick a category
Max P. Wilson suggested
Superbad and that is
a
superhero movies
that Leonard gave two stars or less
and then I saw
this interesting article on the internet about
Werner Herzog's
top five movies
so that's in here about Werner Herzog's top five movies.
So that's in here.
That's the whole category.
Werner Herzog's top five movies. Is one of them just like The Ocean or something?
You know, there's no reason for pre-guessing.
And then your third option,
Mark, is
R-A-U-L-E-A-U-S-S-E-L-L
on Twitter.
I don't even know what that's supposed to be.
Are you trying to keep a baby
from understanding what you're saying?
I'm swearing up a storm
in front of a baby.
I swear to God, because if you spell nap time, I know it.
Speaking of nap time,
your third option,
as suggested by that weird name,
is Infinite Rest.
And that's movies where someone's in a coma.
Okay.
So you have the coma, you got the Werner Herzog,
and you got superhero movies that did not,
that Leonard did not care about.
Let's go coma.
Coma.
All right, this movie is from 1978.
Three stars from Leonard.
He says about this movie, 78. Three stars from Leonard.
He says about this movie that you should look for Tom Selleck as Murphy.
Was Tom Selleck Murphy in Robocop?
No.
Okay.
And
Oh, he says that the two lead characters are well-matched adversaries.
And he lists eight names.
Seven names.
Let's go with seven names.
Seven?
Seven names.
Give me all seven.
Rich.
Six.
Rich really wants this.
As soon as you started listing the Leonard thing,
he did this take like he was an alcoholic father
that was six months behind on the pills.
And it had just been issued one last ultimatum by his wife
that he has to get this movie
otherwise she's going to leave him.
So Rich, name that movie.
All right.
I think you have a shot at this.
Yeah.
Uh-huh.
Somebody's in a coma.
Three stars.
1978.
Tom Selleck as Murphy.
Look for that.
And the leads are well-matched adversaries.
And your six out of seven names are
Lois Childs,
Lance Legault,
Richard Widmark,
Rip Torn,
From Freddy Got Finger?
Elizabeth, yes. Rip Torn from Freddy Got Finger? Elizabeth, yes.
Rip Torn from Freddy Got Finger?
Yes.
Daddy, would you like some sausage?
Sausage.
Sausage.
Elizabeth Ashley and Michael Douglas.
Only one name remains.
What's the name of this movie?
His well-matched adversary remains, right? Michael? His well-matched adversary remains.
Michael Douglas' well-matched adversary. Darth Vader.
Can I ask a question that might help
Rich?
No, I don't like that at all.
Why would you do that?
It would really help narrow it down.
It's about Tom Selleck.
You have a question about Tom Selleck?
Is it why did he not have a mustache
in the one movie where he's playing a gay guy?
Quick Beat Down Under?
No, it's in In-N-Out.
He didn't have a mustache.
It's the only movie where he played a gay fellow.
And that's the one he shaves that gay mustache off for.
Best 80s TV star to go gay later in a movie bacula for the Liberace acula killed that oh Scott Bacula yeah yeah I kept waiting have you seen Scott Is it good?
Do you have a guess, Rich?
No.
I'm going to go with an officer and a gentleman.
This one's going to make you angriest at yourself when you've ever been on this show.
Because the movie's called Coma.
Oh, fuck.
I kept saying it over and over again.
Now can I ask what my question was?
Yes.
Does Tom Selleck, does he wear a Detroit Tigers hat in the movie?
Yes?
I don't know.
Because then my guess would have been Magnum P.I. the coma movie.
No, it's coma, and the lead actress is Genevieve Bujold.
Oh, sure.
And it was her and Richard Whitmark who were adversaries in the movie.
Michael Douglas just comes along and he's like, what?
So that means that DC gets a point, right?
Is that what that means?
When we were having dinner tonight, my seven-year-old said, what are you going to do?
I said, I'm going to do like, it's like game, where I'm going to talk to some of my friends,
and they're going to ask me about movies.
And she said, oh, it's like a game.
And I said, yeah.
She said, are you going to win?
And I said, no, no.
And she said, well, you might.
And I said, I've played it a lot of times, B,
and I've never come even close to winning.
And she said, well, you just have to go try.
Maybe tonight you'll win.
And I said, thanks, honey. And I looked at my wife, and my wife was like, you just have to go try. Maybe tonight you'll win. And I said, thanks, honey.
And I looked at my wife and my wife was like,
you're not going to win.
Now that you tell me that story,
now you put it like that,
I want to beat you so fucking bad in this game.
I want to curb your hopes of winning this game.
American History X,
you were up for that part, right?
I've been up for every part in the last 22 years.
I just turn them down.
My daughter, too.
She was like, you gonna win tonight?
And I said, I'm Mark Wahlberg.
I don't fucking lose.
I let other people win sometimes,
but I don't fucking lose.
Oh, okay, there's that loophole,
because I have seen you let other people win.
Yeah.
I just realized that we look art directed
with what we're wearing, all of us right
now. It looks like somebody selected
all of this and said, go guys, this is
what you're all going to wear. Yeah, we look like the world's
best catalog right now.
For the listener at home, we're wearing
clothes.
Alright, so who was left out of that?
Oh, Mark.
So we're going to start with Mark again,
and then we'll go to DC.
So Mark gets a pip between the Ben Affleck on Twitter
suggested the Skeleton Twins.
And that, of course, is the films of Ashley and Mary-Kate Olsen.
Yeah!
in Mary-Kate Olsen.
I just repeat them after they make me laugh.
And also because it's just funny to even suggest that anybody on this panel would know anything
about their movies.
Do you know them at all, Mark?
No.
Yeah, I didn't think so.
One time I was on 23rd and 6th in New York City,
and they were walking the other way,
and I looked at them,
I waited right for the traffic to die down,
and I just went,
E!
And I laughed and laughed.
Probably just sounded like a car horn
from where they were standing.
Oh, fuck, you're probably right.
E!
Well, you do do most of the Foley on your
movies, right? I do. If I was not
a movie star, I'd be a Foley artist.
I'm not...
Get up!
Wow!
You should be
up for the police. Amazing!
That's amazing.
You should be up for the Police Academy reboot.
Oh, hey. You guys like to go camping?
Man, I'm really scared out here by the woods.
All fucking day, guys.
All fucking day.
And you know what?
It's free.
Donnie will be standing with a bucket on the way out
if you want to throw something in.
That all goes to him.
Alright.
At
No, the show's going great.
There's no reason for crickets.
We're just camping.
The Eye Collector
That's somebody's name on Twitter.
The Eye Collector. That's somebody's name on Twitter, the Eye Collector.
R, go fuck yourself.
And that's movies that begin with the letter R,
and Leonard gave them less than two stars.
Two stars or less.
And then the third option is Malcolm underscore Irving,
Irvin suggested Tickle Me Elmore,
and that's Elmore Leonard
stories that were
made into comedy films.
Humor
comedies. Those are my favorite.
Which one of those
would you like? Let's all go fuck ourselves.
You sure you don't want the
Olsen twins thing?
No, dude, I don't know a single
fucking movie
okay just double checking
one and a half stars
for this movie
that begins with the letter R
from 1990
Leonard calls it
appallingly and unnecessarily
mean
yeah he also says that
stop motion animation is the film's
only asset.
And he lists ten people.
How many can you get it in?
Give me all ten.
Okay. DC?
Nine, I guess.
Okay.
1990, what was it?
Think of your family.
Will you do me a favor?
When you get home
and you tell your daughter
you lost,
will you take a picture
and tweet it?
Wake her up.
Wake her up.
And you tell her,
be like...
Yeah, because daddy's
going to drink for a while
before he goes home.
Oh, for sure.
I'm going to just pull over here
and drink this off real quick.
I can walk home from here.
It's fine.
And tell her, you'd be like, you either tell her Mark Wahlberg beat me or he let D.C. Pearson win.
I'll, uh, I'll, uh, I'll, uh.
I will challenge.
Wait, so D.C.'s going to get eight names right now?
I think nine even, right?
I got six
He's gonna get nine names?
I said all
You went one less?
I went one less, yeah
Yeah, that's what you should have done, Richard
We're gonna have to think of something else to do after this
Because we'll play a Last Man Stanton.
If I get it.
If you get it. Here we go.
We can talk about how mad I am I turned down Burt, man.
You're going to play the Emma Stone part, right?
That's not shit.
I was trying to decide which other cast members
that I suggest.
Patricia Charbonneau
is in this movie.
Willard Pugh.
Robert Doakwe.
These are real names.
Felton Perry.
Gabriel Damon. Tom Noonan.
Belinda Bauer.
Drew O'Hurley. Sorry.
Daniel O'Hurley.
Belinda Bauer,
Drew O'Hurley,
sorry,
Daniel O'Hurley.
And your last name,
eight out of nine names,
or nine out of ten names,
is Nancy Allen.
Movie begins with the letter R.
Unnecessarily mean.
Stop motion animation.
Yeah. Yeah.
1990.
Oh, wow.
Alright, this game might be spicy.
Do you want to
just get the family on speakerphone
and let them hear you win a point?
Oh, boy.
I was looking at the clock to see if they're in bed.
Starts with an R.
Yeah, starts with an R.
You have 15 minutes.
I really don't know.
I'm going to say it starts with an R,
and it doesn't have stop motion animation,
so that's why I'm going to say Rescuers, Down Under.
Fair enough.
Featuring Tom Noonan playing his Manhunter character.
The top-billed person in this movie is Peter Weller,
and it's RoboCop 2.
Oh!
RoboCop 2, yeah.
That's brutal.
Yeah.
Well, you know, for me, the other way around,
and of course this is speculation that's based on not being under pressure
but Nancy Allen
had like three or four movies
around that time.
She was on a pretty hot streak there
and then wasn't anymore.
So it's kind of easy
to isolate her down
to like five or six movies.
Yeah, yeah.
My day-by-day calendar
of her career
ran out a couple years ago.
I don't know who the fuck we're talking about.
Murphy.
We're talking about Murphy.
Nancy Allen was in two of the best De Palma movies.
Nancy, no, I think Karen Allen.
No, I got nothing.
Karen Allen's Raiders of the Lost Ark.
Yeah, Starman.
But they were both popular around the same time.
I mean, popular is a stretch, but Nancy Allen was in 1941.
She was the lady that only got off if she was in an airplane that was about to crash.
Remember that?
You know, that comedy.
Very sexy.
Yeah, that comedy.
That's a thing?
Yeah, it really is.
Internet, man.
Annie Hussle.
Yeah, she was in Dressed to Kill
and Blowout
and anyway
yeah
and Robocop
and Robocop 2
that's the career
of Nancy Allen
thanks for coming by
the Nancy Allen epoch
and she was married
to Craig Shoemaker
the love master
for a while
or was his girlfriend
let's move on
Doug you know your shit no shit useless shit for a while. Or was his girlfriend. Let's move on.
Doug, you know your shit, dude.
No shit.
Useless shit.
Rich is on the board, you guys.
He played it smart.
I thought he was being dumb,
and he played it smart.
And we'll try to get movies that you guys have actually heard of
going here.
So who challenged who there?
Rich challenged DC.
Okay, so we're back to Mark gets to pick again.
This is crazy.
Mark gets to pick and then
it goes to Rich.
And Mark, you've got
these options.
Dr. Chainsaw 4
suggested Hey Everybody
and that's movies that have a talking horse.
Big Jaron BCN suggested Truce Willis, and that's movies where Bruce Willis does not shoot a gun.
And JackBastard77 suggested Voight or Wilson
and that's movies with John Voight
or a volleyball.
Let's go with Truce Wilson.
Okay.
Truce Willis.
Yeah, you're right. That combines for something.
Movies where
Wilson Phillips does not fire a gun.
Movies where
nobody wins a
volleyball game.
Top Gun.
So to the best
of my...
Oh fuck,
that would have
been a good one
for volleyball,
Top Gun.
Man, the audience
won that volleyball
game.
Yeah.
Playing with the
boys, bro.
To the best of my knowledge, he does not fire off a gun in this movie.
He may for some reason, but I don't think so.
Everyone will loudly verify after we've discovered the name of this movie.
Two stars from Leonard.
It's from the year 2000.
He says about this movie that it has its moments,
but doesn't
quite come off.
And here's maybe one of my favorite
clues I've said in a while.
Matthew Perry appears
here suit and unbilled.
So fucking Matthew Perry
shows up in this movie with a beard
and then did not want to take credit for being in this movie.
And then Leonard List did.
Did they know he was in the movie?
He snuck into this movie and Leonard Maltin's keen eye caught it.
Like at the end of his review of Captain America the Winter Soldier,
it says D.C. Pearson appears, here suits, and build.
How many names did I say?
Nine.
Nine names.
Negative two.
Boo!
Plamo!
You either think you know it or you don't.
Mark, it goes to me or Rich?
Me, I think, right?
It goes to Rich, yeah, because he challenged last time.
I'm going to have to challenge on that one.
Yeah, there's nothing else you can do.
Holy crap, Marks.
You're going to name this movie.
I'm going to try to.
And then the top two billed performers.
Right.
Then I'm going to drive about two miles from here,
wake up a kid, and say, you're welcome.
I feel like I know it.
All right, well, that'll give us a three-way tie.
And that's exactly what I was hoping for with this episode. If you can do this.
The story of us, Bruce Willis, Michelle Pfeiffer.
Did I get it wrong?
Somebody made a sad sound like a puppy got kicked.
Yeah, it is
kind of sad. Damn.
Because
I still think you should tell some
children you're welcome.
Because that makes Rich our winner, right?
There we go, dude.
It's almost like I let someone win.
God damn it.
The movie's called Disney's The Kid.
And it's Bruce Willis and Spencer Breslin
are the top two people billed in that one.
You sure Bruce Willis is in that?
He's in it, and then there's a kid
pretending to be little Bruce Willis.
All right.
Who shows up to tell him a thing or two.
I like the one I named because he had to spend like three hours yelling at Michelle
Pfeiffer.
But it should be the other way around.
Bruce Willis, as soon as that kid walks in, he should start going, okay, when this happens,
do this.
And when this happens, he should give him a bunch of tips about every mistake he made
in his life.
Yeah, like in Freakway 2.
The other way around, the kid just sits around judging him,
treating him like he's doing something wrong.
No, I would tell him what to do.
If you could manifest your own eight-year-old self, you're pretty awesome.
Yeah, that'd be fucking great.
That's X-Men shit.
That'd be a terrible X-Men power.
I can have an eight-year-old that was me when I was eight, right nearby.
That's my mutant power.
The mac and cheese budget would be through the roof.
All right.
So, yeah, that means Rich is our winner.
So who are you playing for there again, Rich?
For Mikey.
Mikey.
Mikey.
Come get your prize bag, dude.
It's a good one.
Congratulations.
Can you make it to Festival Supreme on Saturday? Okay, a good one. Congratulations. Can you make it to Festival Supreme on Saturday?
Okay, good, good, good.
Can you make it to Paradise?
Just keep trying with that one.
It's still really good.
It's a great fucking song, dude.
It really is.
Do you have a shithead on the back of your thing there?
I sure do.
Yeah, you do.
And Mark, do you have one on the back of your bottle?
This is the truth, too.
Oh, really?
Does Mark get to keep the bottle?
All right.
That's happening.
Okay.
Put those right there.
And we've got seven minutes.
Let's use them wisely.
Let's play a round of Last Man Stanton.
And I'll join in.
And it'll be fun.
Did you hear two people started to try to clap?
I know.
I love this fucking game.
Let's do this.
All right.
So we need...
Raise your hand if you think you got a good one.
A good actor, director, actress.
Will Wheaton.
What?
Did somebody say?
How many movies has Will Wheaton been in?
The best fucking movies.
Who do you think looks like they're going to give us something good and not, you know...
I mean, this guy's got the most energy.
Oh, that's never a good sign, is it?
All right, we'll go since Mark...
You better not say Tom Skerritt or somebody like that.
Michael Madsen?
Michael Madsen.
I say we reject that one.
Yeah, I'm up for rejection.
Not him.
He's really good, though, in that Iggy Azalea video.
It is a good... I mean, he's fucking badass.
Yeah, he's like, I don't like this sandwich.
It's a really clever dialogue they gave him.
How about this gentleman right here in the front?
Keanu Reeves. The Hirsute
gentleman. Keanu Reeves,
we just did him.
I know, and I listened to it. Let's fucking go.
Oh.
So that's out. Alright, let's go to
another Hirsute gentleman. It's Hirsute night. Owen Wilson. Owen Wilson, okay. All right. Let's go to another Here's Suit, gentlemen.
It's Here's Suit night.
Owen Wilson.
Owen Wilson.
Okay.
Accepted.
Excellent.
Who wants to go first?
I will.
All right.
Greatest movie he did,
Shanghai Nights.
That's your favorite one?
Shanghai Nights? It's not my favorite,
but technically
it's the best movie he's done.
Technically the greatest.
All right.
Okay.
Interesting way of A Really good foley
working back there. By yours truly.
Rich, what do you got for us?
Royal Tenenbaums.
Oh yes, the Royal Tenenbaums.
I'm going to take the freebie and go Shanghai Noon.
I don't think
that's really a freebie because I was kind of sitting
there going, what was the other one called?
But I'm going to go for what I think really a freebie, because I was kind of sitting here going, what was the other one called? But I'm going to go for what I think is a freebie and say Bottle Rocket.
Bastard.
Midnight in Paris.
Mark, what?
Midnight in Paris.
Midnight in Paris, yes.
I have one.
I kind of wanted to save it, but...
Mark, why haven't you been in a Woody Allen movie?
Thanks, Doug.
For the listener at home, I'm looking blankly back at Doug.
I don't know, dude.
Are you waiting for him to do a Boston-centric one?
He's done Rome, he's done New York, he's done Paris.
That would be great.
I would love it if he did that.
I just feel like Woody and I, we just aren't on the same page.
I keep asking him to work out.
We won't do it.
I'll just do, are you? If you did, we could get to know each
other if you just want to hit the elliptical for an hour or two.
He says no.
Are you here?
I'm right here, bro.
What's that?
That was just out this summer, directed
by my... and written by
Mad Men's creator, Matthew Weiner.
Is it good?
Zach Galifianakis and Amy Poehler.
It's ringing some bells now.
Yeah.
Have you seen it?
I have.
Oh, okay.
Check it out, everybody.
Absolutely.
Also check out
The Giant Mechanical Man.
DC?
I really appreciate that you pushed that.
Darjeeling Limited.
Oh, yeah. That's one of my
favorite things that ever happens in anything
is when
they're like
the three guys,
he and his, Adrian Brody
and Jason Schwartzman, the three of them
are like in a river
and they look over and Owen Wilson goes,
what's up with, what's going on with these assholes?
And then they cut to children drowning.
And so that's fucking hilarious.
And then they run over and help and save them.
So it's like also just a very emotional scene
right after this hilarious moment
where his character says that
very strange thing.
And I'm not
telling that story to Stahl
because I am very
excited.
I am very excited
to say, drill bit
Taylor.
Nice.
When I saw that movie on cable recently,
I really enjoyed it.
Because it's got
all those people that have been in every other
comedy movie since then, but at the time, they were
a little less known, so it was like,
it didn't stick as well.
Mark? Old school.
Yeah, of course.
What?
What do you do in old school?
Oh, you're right.
Holy shit.
When you come from a family of actors,
it's probably easy to confuse brothers like that.
Can I go to an alternate or do you want to kill it?
No, you're out.
That was just you telling us where you're from
and how you get down, right?
Yeah, it is.
You know what?
You didn't even give an answer yet? That was just
talk between... I was going to start a rap,
but forget about that.
We didn't know because you didn't do any of
your signature ad libs like, come on or feel it.
Because I'm an old fool who's so cool.
It doesn't matter.
It's a Very existentialist
wrath.
I love Albert Camus
a lot.
I'll get down with
the stranger.
You got one, Rich?
I got nothing.
I'm going to pass.
DC's got another one.
You, me, and Dupree.
Yeah.
There you go.
Wasn't it an
Elmore Leonard thing?
The big bounce?
I believe it.
Yeah, I think so.
Hey, Doug, you know all those times that I gave you one?
How about you give me one and let me come back in?
You can do that thing at the end
where you show off and say some more.
DC's got another one, I'm sure.
I just thought of another one.
Go ahead.
Behind Enemy Lines.
I'm pretty sure he just thought of another one. Okay. Go ahead. Behind Enemy Lines. Uh-huh.
I'm pretty sure he was in a little
motion picture
called Armageddon.
Yeah, yeah.
Checks out.
Everyone's so quiet tonight.
With the Owen Wilson
scholars in the audience.
I don't feel like
I'm right or wrong.
I'm waiting for a buzzer
or something.
No, everybody's so nice.
It's like everybody's like,
do you want to go to the library
or go see Douglas movies?
I don't know. It's a little, I don't know. I love it. I fucking love it. It's a little loud like, do you want to go to the library or go see Douglas movies? I don't know.
It's a little,
I don't know.
I love it.
I fucking love it.
It's a little loud at the library.
Let's go to Douglas movies.
I will go with
A Night at the Museum.
Boom.
Wow.
Oh,
well,
fuck that.
I got to go
A Night at the Museum
to A Night at the Smithsonian
or some shit like that,
right?
It's actually,
should I do this?
I don't know
the exact title,
so I'm not gonna risk it.
National Lampoon
is not at the museum.
I'm not gonna,
I'm not gonna brisk it.
I'm gonna say,
I'm gonna go with,
um,
um,
um,
is he in the Grand Budapest Hotel?
Yeah.
Yay.
Oh, we can ask first?
No, I would have been out if that had been incorrect.
I know DC's going to win this.
He's got another one.
Night at the Museum 2.
Uh-huh.
Right?
No, that's why I gave up on it,
because I'm not sure what the exact title is.
Somebody in this audience knows.
I think it's like...
Uh...
Nope.
Night at the Museum 2...
Back in the Habit.
Money Never Sleeps.
I don't know.
I'm sorry.
I'm out.
All right.
Let me just slam dunk it home
with the internship
and Wedding Crashers.
There you go.
There you go.
And what else have you got, Mark?
That was it.
That was it.
Those are the ones.
Yeah.
And then I'm sure he's got a couple more.
Zoolander.
Zoolander.
Oh, I just watched that.
Marley and Me, one of my favorite sad movies.
Which they're making into a TV show, because that dog is going to die slow.
I agree.
That was sad.
That was totally sad.
What else?
Battle of the Smithsonian.
Life Aquatic.
Oh, Battle.
Oh, Life Aquatic.
Battle of the Smithsonian is what the subtitle was. Battle of the Smithsonian. Life Aquatic Battle at the Smithsonian is what the subtitle was
Life Aquatic
I guess he wasn't in Moonrise Kingdom
but he's in every other
pretty much
and he wasn't in Rushmore
didn't he have one scene in Rushmore
I think he did
no that's Luke
Luke is the nurse boyfriend
oh are they oh and Wilson has one scene in The Cable Guy I think he did. No, that's Luke. Luke is the nurse boyfriend. Oh, okay.
Oh, are they?
He has... Oh, and Wilson has one scene in The Cable Guy.
Oh.
Yeah, that's a nice pull.
Just in time for me to say apologies to Put Your Hands Together,
because now we have gone over by a couple of minutes.
What do you got to plug, DC?
Besides Crap Kingdom is now in the Softbound cover.
Softbound cover.
My other book's called
The Boy Who Couldn't Sleep and Never Had To. I'm on
Twitter at twitter.com
slash DC Pearson P-I-E
R-S-O-N.
Excellent. Rich, when's Mad Men
coming back? Sometime next year.
March or April. And what can we see you
do? Are you going to be treading the boards
of Broadway
again? I don't know.
I hope to.
I hope to.
I'm shooting an episode of The League starting tomorrow, which I'm very excited about. Oh, that's super fun.
Way to fucking go.
That'll be very fun.
Keep that winning streak going.
Right?
Yeah.
You're on a hot streak.
Mark?
You guys.
Yeah?
Forget Wahlburgers.
Forget the end of fucking Boardwalk Empire.
I'm about to tell you something.
Forget Wahlburgers, forget the end of fucking Boardwalk Empire I'm about to tell you something
November 4th
The new UCB Theater
Western and Sunset
We're going to do another fucking Wahlburg solution
Guess who's going to be on it?
One of the people
Adam Sandler
We're going to bring that motherfucker to task
So guys, I want you to be there
It's at 8.30 on Thursday the 4th
At the new UCB Sunset I hope I see every one of you there And if you come, I want you to be there. It's at 8.30 on Thursday the 4th at the new UCB Sunset. I hope I see
every one of you there. And if you come,
I'll let you wear the bracelet.
I can't believe it. Mark Wahlberg
and Adam Sandler are both
going to be at this same thing.
Sounds amazing.
I am going to be
in Tempe, Tampa, Nashville,
San Diego,
all those places in November.
Go to Douglovesmovies.com
for all the details.
And thanks again to the panel.
Let's hear it for D.C. Pearson, Rich Sommer,
and Mark Wahlberg.
Rich, can you come back
and defend your title next week?
I'll be in Australia next week,
but soon.
Okay.
And as always, Nancy Grace is a shithead. Come back and defend your title next week? I'll be in Australia next week, but soon. Okay.
And as always,
Nancy Grace is a shithead.
And anyone who says that they would not like to wake up in the morning next to
John Stamos is a shithead.
Now it's time for those who want to
cover foggy eyes of old and viewing prowess makes it foggy. now it's time for Doug to watch another Pocky
eyes unfolded
viewing prowess
makes it
Pocky
there's no room
in his heart
for you
cause Doug
loves
movies