Doug Loves Movies - Rob Corddry, David Koechner, Matt Walsh, and Jason Nash Guest
Episode Date: August 26, 2014Doug welcomes actors Rob Corddry, David Koechner, Matt Walsh, and Jason Nash to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/pri...vacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, squeaky babies, sticky seeds
With 50 acid pop-up kernels in his teeth
There's still not one that he won't see
Cause Doug loves movies
What a turnout.
It wasn't as hot out today as I thought it was going to be.
It was rather nice.
So standing out in line wasn't too tough.
So we got such a great crowd that coming in,
I almost hit someone in the face with the prize bag because I didn't know there was going to be anybody sitting on the floor.
Hey, everybody.
My name is Doug, and I love movies.
This is I Love Movies.
That kind of sounded like singing.
Coming to you from the UCB Theater in L.A. on Tuesday, August 26, 2014,
Wolf of Wall Street fight, Terminator 2, Judgment Day of the Dead,
Men Walking Tall, The President's Men, and Black Fisher, King Ralph,
Dog Day, Afternoon Delight, Sleeperfect Murder, Walking tall, the president's men and blackfisher, King Ralph, dog day, afternoon delight,
sleeper, feck, murder by death,
wish three of me ghost worlds,
end of watchmen, don't leaving,
Las Vegas, food, la jingle,
all the Wayne's World's fastest Indiana Jones
and the temple of doomsday of thunder.
Doomsdays of thunder.
Thank you, Seattle, Washington for two great shows last Friday
I'm very proud of the work
we did and I look forward to
everybody getting to see
my first ever hour special
Doug Dynasty
sometime very soon
I love you so much Seattle I'll be back this weekend for Bumbershoot dynasty sometime very soon.
I love you so much, Seattle. I'll be back this weekend for Bumbershoot, as I am
almost every year. Saturday I'm doing
stand-up at 8 o'clock, and
Sunday I'm doing Douglas movies at
4.45pm.
So on one of those,
I'll be a little higher than the other one.
And on my
way there, I'm stopping off in Portland, Oregon
for a Douglas Movies taping Thursday
at the Mission Theater at 420.
And then Friday, I'm showing
Greatest Movie Ever Rolled
at the Mission Theater at 515
with a Q&A afterwards.
And both are part of the
Portland International Film Festival.
The prize bag includes...
It's got
so much great stuff I can't even
as you can see there's four seats out here
today and
I'm very excited. We've got some
couple of new guests
so let's all be gentle.
And please welcome
Jason Nash, Matt Walsh,
David Koechner, and Rob Corddry. Dave's in charge already.
He just called out the seating order.
No, just the filmmaker I thought should sit next to the brilliance.
That was really nice because I was no way going to take the front seat.
Yeah, it's kind of an alpha.
It's a power seat on most episodes.
And first-timer Jason Nash, everybody.
Let's hear it for him.
This entire episode is in celebration of his latest project, his latest work.
You've always had projects for as long as I've known you,
and I'm ashamed
that it's taken this long
to get you on the show
to promote one.
But finally you worked
with some people
of a caliber.
Yeah.
That,
but seriously.
Did you make my documentary
on open micers?
You did that?
Yeah.
Jason Nash,
you guys,
is the star of
Jason Nash is Married.
Also directed it and wrote it and probably producer credit as well on there, I would think.
Yeah, crafty.
Yeah, if you're doing all that stuff.
All that.
And how can people see it?
You can go to iTunes and buy it there, or you can go to the Downtown Independent starting September 5th and see it there.
Oh, in L.A.
You can see it in a theater.
Is it going to have a few more other spots
that's going to open
theatrically
or is it basically...
Yeah, I think it's going to be
at iPic in Westwood
later on in the fall.
It's like the seat...
That's the theater
where they have fancy seats
and they kick back
and you can get more.
They're so fancy.
It's kind of like
playing with sleeper seats
and I got to be honest with you,
the one movie I saw there,
I saw the Spider-Man,
the most recent Spider-Man there,
and I fucking,
I'm so good at sleeping on planes
that once they're recreating
the plane experience,
they bring your food on a tray
and your seat leans way back
and you're in a dark theater
with only like 60 other people.
They're small.
So I fucking...
You fell asleep.
I went lights out, yeah.
It was an awesome nap.
And they were like,
sir, your burger.
I saw the whole movie later
and my initial judgment was correct.
But...
What'd you bring for the prize bag, Jason?
I brought a digital copy of the movie.
There you go.
That's sweet.
So you have to have an iTunes email to win.
Hmm. Interesting.
People not have that?
So you'll have to just confer with Jason about this.
Is everybody all set up on the internet?
I'm on the cloud. I'm in the cloud.
You are in the cloud.
I'm currently in the cloud.
You'll be able to do that.
Okay.
And the first person to speak there
is another first-time guest.
It's Rob Corddry, everybody.
Wow.
Woo! person to speak there is another first time guest. It's Rob Corddry, everybody. Now, of course, I put a Douglas Movies
t-shirt in here, as I do most weeks,
but this is probably the best shirt
gift that anybody's ever
brought for the prize bag.
This is an actual smock
worn by him on
Children's Hospital.
Smock.
Covered in blood,
but also his signature.
Yeah.
Because his character on the show
often had famous Rob Corddry's signature
on his smock.
To devalue it a little.
But that's pretty awesome.
That blood is so intense and so thick
that you can't even fold the shirt
where the blood is.
And if I'm sweating when I'm shooting,
then my whole chest,
because I'm a hairy person.
Totally fucking cool with everybody knowing that.
All over.
I'm covered in sticky blood.
Costume blood. and I hate it
couldn't you have written that aspect of it out
after one episode like that was uncomfortable
yeah stupid or I could just wear a t-shirt
like a nice cotton t-shirt
where the blood's not so bad at all
I could easily protect myself against it
but I did it once, and I was like,
this is great with a T-shirt,
and then I never did it again.
Well, thank you for being here,
and thank you for being an exemplary first-time guest
with such an amazing gift.
One of our regular guests here on the program
has been on frequently.
You know him from the motion picture
Cheap Thrills.
Cheap Thrills.
Dave Koechner's here, everybody.
He's also in some Anchorman series.
There's a series of Anchorman films.
Hello, Mr. Benson.
And you brought a $20 bill taped to some paper towels backstage
that you got permission from one of the four original members
of the Upright Citizens Brigade,
like one of the four founders.
That's Bess's favorite paper towel roll.
I told you this.
Don't you need two members?
What?
And you wrote on there,
Hi, I'm David.
I forgot to bring a gift.
Love, Dave Keckner.
And the date.
And you taped it all together.
That's like,
I would keep this in a paper towel
slash money emergency
in my home, you know?
Just be sitting there
and just like,
if I don't have to use either,
life's pretty good.
But thank you for bringing that, man.
Thank you for having me.
And you are, let's go back, But thank you for bringing that, man. Thank you for having me.
And you are... Let's go back.
Let's double back here for a second.
Rob, what do you play in Jason is Married?
I don't...
Rob?
He plays a guy who...
He has an affair with my wife.
I play a bald guy.
Oh, okay.
Yes.
I'm so happy that Rob is on
the show. And that we're sitting next to each other.
Because everyone here can go, oh,
there are two of them. People will finally know.
It's not the same guy.
I can't... Does anyone think it is
the same guy? Yeah, still.
Does anyone still think that? All the time.
I'm sure, yeah.
Your mind is blown right now. Yeah, different guy. Can you believe this? All the time. Because I'm sure, yeah. He was like, your mind is blown right now.
Yeah, different guy.
Can you believe this?
No.
There they are,
the kick tree brothers.
Close your eyes,
take down your pants,
and then let's see
if you can guess.
Do it.
Do it.
That's not a terrible game.
That'd be kind of a fun game.
Yeah, it's...
Do it.
Just be a sport.
Just take down your pants, man.
Just take your pants down. No one's going to care. Don't be a weirdo. I's do it. Just be a sport. Just take down your pants, man. Make it easier for us.
Just take your pants down.
No one's going to care.
Don't be a weirdo.
I would do it.
I've done it before.
I've been to shows here.
I was in the audience.
They had Keckner at me.
I took my pants down.
My ball's out.
Don't be a weirdo.
It's fine.
They do it all.
There's a class here in that.
They teach that.
Trust me, there's a payoff.
Don't make it dirty, folks.
This is not dirty.
Dave, what do you play in Jason is Married?
I play Jason's neighbor, right?
Yeah, he plays...
You were Jason Bateman's neighbor in Extract, right?
I love movies.
There's got to be a sitcom begging for me to be a neighbor.
What is my name?
I forget.
Neighbor Dave.
Yeah, Neighbor Dave.
My favorite line was,
or maybe his character is,
didn't fuck my wife?
You were wearing a mustache.
I said,
pretty nice dick sweeper
you got there.
What's with the dick sweeper? What's with the dick sweeper?
What's with the dick sweeper? I had a mustache
for the movie and I thought it looked good at the time.
Then I watched the movie. I was like, oh, that was awful.
Well, that was a good line.
You wrote that. It was very funny. Thanks, Dave.
It's really nice of you to say that
right now in front of everybody.
It was a fun scene. We had a good time.
We were in a
really nice apartment in North Hollywood.
Yeah, way out.
Deep.
Yeah, deep, deep, where the train tracks are.
No air conditioning.
No.
Not blood on the floor.
Oh, my God.
A deer on the wall.
I will say this, though.
That was probably the guy's apartment.
Don't say his name because I don't want to embarrass him.
Probably the most horrendous bathroom I've ever seen.
Yeah.
Was it Hugh Hefner?
Yes.
We had to wake up a squatter to shoot, remember?
We had to kick that guy out.
Yeah.
He was all mad.
Yeah.
Because he didn't want to be woken up.
Authentic joint.
It was a fun scene, though.
All right, guys.
What?
I thought we were supposed to talk about the movies.
No, no. That was a great discussion,
but we still haven't said hello
to our fourth guest, who is one of the
cockiest of podcast guests, does not need
a microphone, just leaves it on
the table. I'm just leaving it on the table.
Let these guys... I was staying out of the way.
Let these guys run their yaks until they get tired,
but I'm going to bring it.
Matt Walsh, everybody. Thank you. These guys run their yaks until they get tired, but I'm going to bring it.
Matt Walsh, everybody.
Thank you.
My best.
My best.
Keckner's the best.
Keckner's the best.
One of my favorites.
You guys are all great, but here's why I love you, Matt Walsh.
You brought season two of Veep. Yeah, it. I predicted it before you got here.
You called my gift.
For a second, I know Veep is
television and not movies, but
not only is it a fantastic show, but
that Julia Louis-Dreyfus,
she figures out
ways to make her acceptance speech
amazingly entertaining.
She is like a true
she is the funniest lady
alive today. No offense to all the others.
Because I just realized
there's some other good ones out there. But I'm just saying
she's fucking amazing.
That bit last night
spoiler for anybody who taped it
and you DVR'd
it baseball Jordan. I apologize. But it's night, spoiler for anybody who taped it and you DVR'd it, Baseball Jordan,
I apologize.
But it's
that payoff with Cranston,
she had to win for that payoff to happen.
Yeah. That's
really determined. It's crazy.
The first bit was funny and she sold
the shit out of it. As soon as she was done,
because we watched it at Cinefamily,
as soon as she was done, everyone was like, that's how
it's done. Because there were a lot of people
just struggling through
the material. That clearly don't
show up, find out what they're doing,
and then fix it like she does.
And Amy Poehler, by the way.
Always does hilarious shit
at awards shows. Another founding member
of UCB.
Another founding member of UCB.
And we'll have to run this paper
towel thing by her when we get a chance.
Could also be the funniest woman
around. I mean, I don't know. It's hard to say.
I'd take that. Heidi Klum.
Heidi Klum would be up there. Heidi Klum
is definitely my favorite.
Throw him off.
She was funny. She was hilarious.
Did you guys ever see...
There was a Swimsuit...
Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition TV show.
You know, they'd always do a TV version of it.
And there was one year, it was on TBS, I think,
and the co-hosts were Heidi Klum and Andy Kindler.
And if you could get your fucking hands on that,
it is the most hilarious thing.
Like, it really endears you to Heidi Klum that
she's so entertained by Eddie Kindler.
She loves
him. How could she possibly get
anything that's happening?
That is good.
How could you not love Kindler?
I guess you can. It was pretty amazing.
I thought Seal was finished.
I thought
Eddie Kindler was going to swoop in and get back.
She's done with Seal?
That's done, yeah.
How late am I on that one?
A little late.
Two years?
Not that long, though.
She was dating Seal?
They were married.
Yes, and, folks.
Yes, and.
There's a copy of Gateway Doug 2 Forced Fun in the prize bag.
This is something a young lady gave me out on the road
that I'm confused by
I think it's for children
it's kind of a pot book for children
and it's called
If a Peacock Finds a Pot Leaf
that seems pretty solid
good to show your kids
oh I was going to say
that's one of the things I like about Matt Walsh,
amongst many things I like about him,
but perhaps one of the best is that he was on Getting Doug with High,
and he was the first in, you know, who knows,
it might be only a retracted episode,
because he thought about his family and his child and... Children?
Child? And pets?
Maybe? Children? And just said,
oh, I shouldn't have done that.
So then
I said, and he's like, can we pull that episode
down? And I was like, well, we have
lots of people that'll be disappointed that it's
gone. They'll ask me about it all the time.
So if you just make a video that we'll put in place
of the old video. So now it looks like a regular episode of the show in the archives when you click on it
it's uh matt on his iphone uh just apologizing for pulling the episode down but my favorite
thing about it was you said i had a great time doing it i loved getting high with d and I would love to do it again sometime.
Just not on camera.
Let's get high again sometime.
I thought you meant you'd do the show again sometime.
It kind of felt like... Which would be weird if you
just said, okay, I'll do it again and then afterwards,
can we retract that one also?
But maybe like, you know, when the kids
are 18 or something maybe?
Can I do it when they're 18?
You made a whole movie called The High Road.
Your kids are not going to be that stupid
that they will be protected from your pot use.
Yeah, there's a lot of stuff out there
on you doing stupid stuff.
I don't know.
It was more like, it's more like play date stuff,
which you guys can relate to.
It's just like, you meet families,
and it's like, oh, that's the dad who gets high.
I don't think our kid's going to come over.
Do you know what I mean?
Our kid was extra tired when he came home from the Walsh house.
Are they just blowing it in her face?
We have a weed humidifier in our entryway.
But it would also be an easy way to find out when your kid starts smoking pot.
How? Because they'd say, hey. I saw that. Yeah. Oh, my God. also be an easy way to find out when your kids start smoking pot how because they say hey i saw
that yeah oh my god yeah yeah it means they get so everyone who starts smoking weed because of
i think it does maybe yeah i used to see jimmy kimmel's daughter over at her over at his house
all the time.
She was just a teenage girl,
seemed perfectly nice and innocent,
never said a word to me,
didn't give a shit about me.
She goes off to college.
Her and her boyfriend come out to a comedy club
and come up to me afterwards.
Oh, we love you, we love weed.
I'm like, what the fuck?
And now she smokes with him, apparently, I guess.
But I guess maybe I shouldn't have shared that.
But good for them, I say.
Retracted.
Yeah.
You need to apologize.
Sarah Silverman on live NBC pre-show
just whips her fucking vapor pen out of her purse.
Because the girl goes,
what do you keep in your clutch? And she's like, oh, you know,
gum and my phone and
weed.
And, you know,
and of course the reporter lady, you know, she had
to be like, oh, well,
I guess you will have a good time
at the show tonight.
Like, it's so fucking decadent.
And Serena's is like, yeah,
I just take a couple of puffs. I don't drink, you know.
Which is great. She's a great advocate.
It's unfortunate that journalists are
always buttoned down people
because they're so judgmental about stuff.
They tend to be buttoned down.
They go buttoned down mode because they don't want to lose
any viewers.
When you want everyone to love you,
that's not the first step
towards being a good journalist
or a good comedian or a good
pretty much anything.
Right, Jason is married?
Right.
Would you be okay if I just called you
that from now on?
That's good, I'll get the word out there.
What's up, Jason is married?
That's good branding within the podcast.
That's good.
Alright, Dave is also
married. I am.
We got two hot dogs from
Pop's Hot Dogs.
This is the longest
19 minutes in. We're still talking about the
prize bag.
Fellow made another one of these for me. It's a really nice
grinder that has
my Douglas Movies face on it. It's like QV me. It's a really nice grinder that has my Douglas Movies face on it.
It's like QVC.
It's metal.
It's really nice. You should go on QVC
and do like pot stuff. I do.
It's called Getting Doug with High every Wednesday
on YouTube.
People accuse it of being like QVC because we do
talk about products a lot.
Oh, we got
some great, I almost spoiled who the guests were tomorrow
on that show. It's going to be great.
But, I mean, Matt, obviously,
we've already discussed him being on it, but the rest of you guys,
you don't want to smoke weed
on live internet.
You asked, and you were very gracious
saying it's okay to take a pass.
Yeah, yeah, of course it's okay.
Well, because
I'm in the same situation.
I have five young children, and probably they might stumble upon it.
You type in David Koechner, and they're like, hey, what's this?
I'm in second grade.
What's my dad doing?
That's what they would say while watching it.
I would hope that your child is already writing a Neil Simon play.
I'm in second grade.
What's dad up to?
So, yeah, I get it, I guess.
I sort of get it.
Sure.
I don't want to be a hypocrite because, you know,
I would like to let my kids make that fully aware decision later in life
than early so I can keep lying to them now until they're 18 or
25. Sure, sure. What the
fuck?
What if you came on as a
character?
Because that's how
you're going to explain cheap thrills to them one day.
Cheap thrills are not going to see until they're 18
as well. Yeah, and you're still going to have some explaining
to do when they're 18 because that character
is horrifying. That's going to hurt my daughter's eyes.
Oh my God. Yeah. It's going to be
brutal for them. Oftentimes my wife will
go, did I know about that?
Go on as me.
That's perfect.
I love it.
Just be awful.
Wait a minute.
No, wait. Hold on.
I've got something for you to wear on the show.
I would go on and smoke pot.
Yeah, there you go.
Have you been on Children's Hospital?
I have.
Oh, yeah.
I have.
Have you?
We just feel like it would be too confusing.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Real business.
There's just like, no, we have tried to go to you
you were unavailable
really
no
you
um
we
had
uh
we didn't
we're just not
doing a lot of
guest stars
these days
because we have
such a strong
cast
so
yeah you
wouldn't make
want to make
them look so
much better
not gonna it would be confusing you know each episode Yeah, you wouldn't want to make them look so much better without bringing me on.
It would be confusing.
You know, each episode is only 15 minutes long, so.
Yeah, it's not a big deal not to have done a children's hospital.
I'd love to have everybody here on a children's hospital,
but it's really not a huge deal. It's a tiny 11-minute show.
That's won some awards.
It'd be like two minutes.
Wow, I called it 15 minutes.
I'll be a hot dog vendor.
You want to do that?
I would love to be a hot dog vendor.
Because we actually have a lot of parts for hot dog vendors
that I did not think of you for, but now I am, and it's perfect.
Okay.
I'll just wheel down the hospital walls.
That's exactly what it is.
The kids just light up.
The cancer is just gone when hot dogs come by.
It's amazing.
That's actually not a bad story idea.
Trace the Ebola back to the hot dog vendor.
Yeah.
I was hoping no one would bring up Ebola
because that is...
I want to talk about Gaza, but...
Please.
Good news, I call it.
But I've got a great ISIS story I want to tee up.
Oh, my ISIS.
Doug's got it on the sheet.
Doug's got it on the sheet.
Yeah, don't worry.
I'll get to it.
I'll set you guys up.
I'm setting everybody up.
That's what I do here. At least it's not hot in here.
Let's keep delaying things.
It is hot.
Mr. Cordray. Go ahead.
Let's do Inside the Actor's
Studio with you. Okay.
Hellbaby. Yeah.
Rapture Palooza.
Warm Bodies. Yeah.
What's with the horror comedy? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
What is going on, sir? Yeah, there's a trend. What's with the horror comedy? Yeah, yeah, yeah. What is going on, sir?
Yeah, that wasn't
a choice. Okay, next question.
I'm a fan of them. Pop tub time machine
too.
You're what? Go ahead.
No, you go ahead. Oh, I'm a fan
of horror comedies.
Yeah, and these are all... I guess that's all I had
to say.
I only brought them up because you're hilarious in all of them.
Well, thank you.
But it was just, it was dawning on me while thinking about your career.
It was weird.
You didn't choose to be in those?
And they came up, nope, I just found myself in them.
They just all came out at the same time.
You play all different levels of...
And seeking a friend.
You're the protagonist, the antagonist, and the middle-tagonist.
Yes, the middle-tagonist was the hardest one to play.
Right?
He said War Bodies?
He wasn't pro or anything.
He's a bit of a middle-taggonist.
He was just hanging out.
Yeah, yeah, he's a mid-taggonist.
Mid-tagged.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then Hot Tub Time Machine 2.
Yeah.
Were you scared to go it without John Cusack?
Yes.
Was everyone on the set nervous?
Yes.
How did it turn out?
It was fine.
Well, Adam Scott plays his son in the movie
because we go into the future.
You don't care if I give away the whole movie, right?
It doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter.
And yeah, so that's good.
I mean, you know,
John Cusack's not in it,
but I think people
will be able to get over it.
It's a bummer.
I die in the end of my movie.
Why would you tell people that?
Because Rob was giving away
the end of it.
I die in the first act
of Hot Tub 2.
That's right.
I've seen the trailer.
It's in the trailer.
It's in the trailer.
That's why they've got to do some time travel.
I don't watch trailers.
I don't watch trailers.
Oh no.
I don't own a TV.
I get to every movie
20 minutes late.
I time it.
I block my eyes and go
la la la la la la la.
It's not annoying to anyone
sitting around me.
And I don't care if it is.
We had an English teacher in high school
who would go to movies like 20 minutes
late because he found it more challenging to piece
the plot together.
Oh, that's kind of funny.
He would encourage us as students to do that.
We're like, no, no.
What a fucking weird thing to do.
I agree.
Oh, I'm just going to go in there and figure this out.
That just sounds like he's cheap and skipped from one movie to another.
He's like, I'll act like I do this on purpose for the challenge.
That's so weird, but now I kind of want to do it.
Well, I'm sure you could
depending on the movie.
I guess so. I do it all the time
on airplanes or something. I'll be flipping around
and then something's a few minutes in and I'll go ahead
and give it a go.
I don't feel good about it, though.
Well, it depends. On an airplane, you're not watching something
you really like or care about.
You're going to like whatever you're watching on an airplane.
Oh yeah, that's where I saw Warm Bodies,
Rapture Palooza,
and Hill Baby.
I don't saw Rapture Palooza on an anything.
It's really funny. My dad saw that movie.
It's so relentlessly dark, that movie.
I think maybe why people didn't respond to it.
But boy, I've had some good-ass laughs.
It's pretty funny, yeah.
Shears is a zombie in it?
Come on.
Yeah.
Paul Shears is a zombie.
Come on.
Who doesn't want that?
Tyler Labine as his zombie cohort.
That's right.
Wisecracking zombie.
Rob Hubel's in there as a guy.
I mean, the whole movie. You're also in movies that the cast is all people that come on. That's right. Wisecracking. Rob Hubel's in there as a guy. I mean, the whole movie,
like, you're also in movies
that the cast is all people
that come on Doug Loves Movies.
Yeah.
That's all I care about.
I'm glad to finally have you,
and I'm glad to finally say,
in your face,
in the face of these other three gentlemen,
Uh-oh, what are you going to say?
Let the games begin!
I wasn't expecting that at all.
Take control of your cheap thrills.
Did you go to the Emmys this year, Matt?
I did.
You know, were you a little sad that you didn't get to do a bit with Julia?
No, I wasn't at all.
I was a little sad we didn't win a show award, but it happens.
You did one with her, though, once, right? On an awards show. We did win a show award, but it happens. You did one with her once, right?
On an awards show?
We did a SAG award.
SAG awards.
And Tony Hale did one on the Emmys last year?
Yep.
Why is everybody holding stuff up?
Okay, here's what's happening.
You don't know the show?
I tried to explain this to Jason right before the show began,
but when they show their name tags, which is what everybody's holding up,
pick the person that you want to play for.
We're going to play some games.
Probably only one and a half games.
We're running late.
Just pick a name tag that you want to play for.
Grab it and bring it back to your seat.
And if it says anything written on the back of it, don't read it out loud.
We're going to save that.
I don't want to fuck this up.
I'm going to pick somebody.
Don't fuck this up, Jason.
Don't fuck it up.
And while Jason and everybody else does that, we'll do this.
We'll be right back.
All right, we're back.
Who are we playing for?
It looks like Jason found a nice lady who just wrote Chelsea on a piece of paper.
And then Jason, and for your edification, the other guys on the panel,
on the back here there's something written that we're not going to say out loud
because if Jason loses today, I will call this person a shithead on behalf of this person.
So it's like a nice consolation prize,
especially this one seems like she really wants that to happen.
So in fact, she's probably maybe rooting for you to lose
because she's probably got plenty of paper towels,
but this particular piece of vengeance probably should be delivered.
Matt, who are you playing for?
Justine or Justina?
Justina.
Justina, and she made a Justina Wolf poster.
Yeah, that's clever.
Justine Wolf?
Yeah, and then she taped it
to some brownies.
Some sea salt brownies.
That sounds so delicious.
But I don't know where the shithead would be.
I think it's maybe on the back of the name tag part.
Or is there one, Justine?
Yeah, there it is.
Good job, Matt.
Great job, Matt.
David, that's what job, Matt. David.
Instant upgrade.
What do you got there, David?
I have a big hula hoop and you decorated this specifically for the show?
I appreciate the work. Now, what's your name?
You're Charlie.
And these other two words, is this for the shithead?
No, I forgot that part.
Okay, so you're Charlie
Hoop Miles.
I get that. That Okay, so you're Charlie Hoop Miles. Yeah. I get that.
That's like your nickname?
Hoop?
Well, he's put it, it's a parenthetical, but no one calls you Hoop?
Not normally.
Well, from this day forward, please.
It's this fucking guy's name is Hoop.
If you know Charlie Miles, call him Hoop.
Is that your girlfriend?
Yeah.
Do you know Hoop?
Oh, you should meet Hoop. What time are we getting together with Hoop after Is that your girlfriend? Do you know Hoop? Oh, you should
meet Hoop. What time we get together with Hoop after the show?
Yeah, well,
almost a great job. We got
so close.
And I realize you forgot to also
tape this to it, so you grabbed
an old receipt.
You wrote your name on it
with a new nickname
for yourself, and then rolled it around the hoop.
And so you put some effort into things.
Do you hula hoop, Dave?
I cannot.
Okay, perfect.
I don't have the perfect choice, then.
Don't have the choice.
We get to keep these?
Because I'm sure Matt eats sea salt brownies.
You can have the whole thing.
They're yours to keep.
I'll taste it.
Do I get to keep these? You thought you'd have to give them back? The hula hoop you'd can have the whole thing. They're yours to keep.
Do you think you'd have to give them back?
The hula hoop you'd probably have to give back.
Charlie, do you want this back?
You do want it back. I have chosen poorly.
Okay.
What have you got, RC?
Well, this is bullshit.
My friend Jason over here,
he held up a roast beef sandwich.
And I was like, that's smart. Jason over here. Uh-huh. He held up a roast beef sandwich. Uh-huh.
And I was like,
that's smart.
That's because I'm a little hungry
and I want
a roast beef sandwich.
So I grabbed
the roast beef sandwich
and then he leaned over
to me during the break
and said,
my name's Jason.
My name's not
on the back of it.
Which leads me to believe
that he's just like,
oh, I brought it.
See, he has a bag
over there from the supermarket next door.
He just grabbed something out of it
to attract my attention
because I'm an animal
and it worked
and his name is Jason.
What else is in the bag, Jason?
This guy. What? Trash.
I didn't have paper towels at my disposal.
Okay. Nice paper towel
callback. Oh, man.
Jason, I'm still gonna win for you, Jason.
And then this guy gave me his
shithead thing. Oh, okay.
Alright, so you're gonna say his shithead
if you lose on behalf of Jason
whose nickname from now on is Roast Beef.
Alright. Roast Beef. All right.
Roast Beef and Hoop.
Yeah.
You guys, Sundays on CBS.
They're going to get a series.
Hoop and Roast Beef.
Out doing nothing.
All right, so...
Hoop.
Apologies to put your hands together,
because this is definitely going to go long.
But you guys, it's been a great panel, though, I got to say.
Yeah.
How's that roast beef?
It's really dry.
I mean, there's a whole, I got to put mustard on it.
Fuck it.
I don't know.
Too much of a hassle, this sandwich.
So much work for this.
I've got to lift it up and put it in my mouth.
You know who made this sandwich?
It's a little bit incomplete.
Old Hoop.
Didn't quite finish it.
No, we got screwed.
Jason bought that sandwich
from Poop's trunk.
Are there pickles on here?
This sandwich sucks.
Go ahead, Doug.
To determine who goes first
in our game today,
we are going to
play a little game
that we like to call
Doing Lines with Mark.
How are you guys doing?
Want to do some lines?
Mark Wahlberg was nice enough
to pre-record a
line from a classic motion picture
performed as only Mark Wahlberg
can perform it.
He'll repeat it a few times, I even think.
First person,
microphones up, sandwiches
down. First person.
I like also that Dave has to sit there holding that hula hoop the whole time.
What about brownies?
Walsh has eaten like half of those brownies already.
Hey, is there weed in those brownies?
No, there better not be.
Okay, good.
There better not be for the sake of the children.
I just ate two.
I think I can handle two.
So Mark Wahlberg's going to say a line
from a classic motion picture.
Just yell out the answer as soon as you know it, guys.
Let's do it, Mark.
All right, you guys ready to do some lines?
Yeah, we can establish that.
Let's do it.
Okay, let's do it.
Let's go ahead and do it.
Oh, yeah?
Well, I've been present for every birth of every little creature on this island.
I've been present...
Dr. Moreau?
For every birth of every little creature...
Dr. No.
...on this island.
Is it one of his movies?
Whose movies?
Mark Wahlberg.
I've been present for every birth of every little creature...
No, it's not necessarily Wahlberg.
Can you give us another line, Mark?
No, this is pre-recorded.
I don't know if you caught that part of it.
All the theme parks have delays.
Is he on the phone?
Oh, wait, he is giving us another line, though.
Holy shit.
Can you run that one back again, Ryan?
All right, you guys, here's one in case you didn't get that, okay?
Okay.
He's always seeking that, Mark.
Theme parks have delays. When they opened Disneyland
in 1956, nothing worked.
Okay?
Mrs. Banks.
What'd you say, Mrs. Banks?
The Philadelphia Eagles movie.
It's not from a Wahlberg movie.
I know I'm thinking the same thing.
It could be from any movie.
It's not a Wahlberg movie.
Don't feel too bad. The other guys know that and they still don't know the answer. It could be from any movie. It's not a Wahlberg movie. It could be from any movie ever made. It's not a Wahlberg movie. It's not a Wahlberg movie.
Yeah, don't feel too bad.
The other guys know that, and they still don't know the answer.
We are cinephiles.
Give us the line again, then.
Give us the Jurassic Park.
Give us the second line.
He got it.
Jason just got it.
What is it?
Jurassic Park?
I was, that's awesome.
Yeah, he's like, give us the line again, Jurassic Park.
I'm sitting there going, departing.
Can we hear it again, Jurassic Park?
Boogie Nights.
Is that because
Sir Richard Attenborough
just died?
Yes.
It's a loving tribute.
That's nice.
All right.
Good job, Mark Wahlberg.
Mark Wahlberg doesn't
fuck around.
Can't wait for your
reality show to start.
Okay.
The game we're going
to play today,
and yes,
rest in peace, Sir Richard. The game we're going to play today And yes Rest in peace Sir Richard
The game we're going to play
Is called Last Man Stanton
A.K.A. The Seth Rogen Game
And
Here's how this works guys
We're going to get
From a member of the audience
I've got to figure out who
This is an interesting crowd
We're going to get from a member of the audience. I've got to figure out who. It's an interesting crowd.
We're going to get from a member of the audience an actor,
director, or actress.
So basically an actor
or director.
Because actor covers
both. What about a child actor?
Actor covers child
actors. How about an animal actor?
Dwarves, animals, they're all
actors. What about a stuntman?
Stuntmen do not count.
Lee Majors.
Lee Majors.
What about a CGI character?
That would be...
Andy Serkis?
No, you guys need to hear how the rest of the game works.
Like Jar Jar Binks or something.
Dumbo Drop, no.
Dumbo Drop.
No, that's just one.
That's one.
You've narrowed it down to one movie.
Boogie Nights.
I don't know what that means.
What's going to happen ised it down to one movie. Boogie Nights. That's, I don't know what that means. What's going to happen is, we're going to take Terns.
I don't know what that voice was.
We're going to take Terns.
That's a new measure.
Terns are going to be taken.
That's a new measure for storage.
Okay.
Instead of a Tetra-bite, it's a Tern-bite.
Stay with me.
No, no, I'm going to keep going.
Sorry. You guys, you were smart
not to smoke all that weed before the show.
Keeps you sharp.
We're going to do...
We're going to take turns naming films
that that person was
involved with, and when you
can't think of one, you're out.
That's how it works.
Single elimination.
It's intense.
Since Matt and Dave have been on the show before, we'll start with Matt
and we'll go to Dave and then we'll go to Rob
and then Doug.
That doesn't make any sense.
I know. It doesn't make any sense.
Who's like a regular
visitor who hasn't gotten to pick one before?
Joe, you've picked one before.
You gave us a weird one, didn't you?
Baseball Jordan, have you ever picked a person?
Yeah, but you do have to do it every episode.
I ask you every time.
This young lady in the pink hair raised her hand.
Oh, she's got a great idea.
Let's hear it.
Steve Martin.
Steve Martin.
I think we've done him on the show before, but these guys weren't on.
So that doesn't, you know, let's do
it, as one audience member suggests.
I don't know what this, the jerk
is thinking, yelling that.
Seth Rogen was the very
first name we used, so it was originally called
Seth Rogen Game, and then when Harry Dean
Stanton played the game, he won,
because we did the movies of Harry Dean Stanton.
So he had kind of a leg up
on us, but still
was only managed to name like four of them.
He didn't have to name a lot to win.
You know,
he came out of the gate with Paris, Texas
and Repo Man, so he really
fucked us. Did he smoke up here
when he did it? No, I only saw
him drink wine like after we went out
for drinks.
He's a nice man.
Yeah.
Do you fuck him?
Some people know otherwise.
Steve Martin,
Matt Walsh,
you get to come out of the gate
with the jerk.
Yeah.
Jason's already frustrated.
So many other movies
since that one.
The game isn't named
the first movie
of Steve Martin.
Am I next?
Am I next?
No, no, no.
It's Dave's turn.
I'd like to go for
The Man with Two Brains.
Mm-hmm.
Very funny movie.
And then we go to
Rob.
L.A. Story.
Yes. People love it. There.A. Story. Yes.
People love it.
There was some agreement around great movie, good choice.
Good movie, good movie.
Good choice, Carter.
Rob's really smart.
You have really good taste, Rob.
Rob's really smart.
Rob, we have the same taste.
We should hang out.
With who?
I'm going to say...
Oh, I remember now doing this one before. I'm going to say... Oh, I remember now doing this one before.
I'm going to say the Pink Panther.
Yeah, yeah.
Good choice.
There we go.
And then I think an argument happened later
when the sequel came up, but no more clues.
Jason?
Parenthood.
Yes, smart.
You didn't fall into that Pink Panther trap I just said.
Because it's got to be
the full correct title, you guys.
Sergeant Bilko?
Oh, yes.
How are you spelling Sergeant?
I'd go S-G-T, period.
That's how I'd do it.
Dave?
Pennies from heaven.
Oh, yes.
Please sing all your answers
but that one was
in fact a musical
Rob
I'm
I'm hung up
on this one
that I
talk us through it
title
oh it's the
oh that one
these guys
then I'm gonna give
these guys
it's true
but you're gonna be out
anyway
if you can't think of it
I know what it is it's Under the... It's true, but you're going to be out anyway if you can't think of it. I know what it is.
It's Under the Rainbow.
That's Chevy Chase.
That's Chevy Chase.
Yeah, so I just...
Not only are you out, you've managed to really insult Steve Martin.
Oh, that was horrible.
I feel terrible.
No, no.
All those guys are in terrible movies.
All right, so...
It just happens.
It's hard to...
Under the Rainbow is a great movie.
I like Under the Rainbow.
I do.
I do, too.
I think I do.
I haven't seen it in 25 years.
It was good.
I like when there's a bunch of dwarves in the elevator
and the guy gets in the elevator.
I think it was Pat McCormick,
and he says,
and he says,
ballroom, you know, like as a request to the elevator. I think it was Pat McCormick. And he says, ballroom.
You know, like as a request to the elevator
operator. But one of the dwarves moves
away from his crotch.
They have a big nut
fascination in that movie.
Of course they do.
That's all the people in,
the little people in Wizard of Oz were all
just running around making nut jokes
about the tall people.
They're nut height.
They're totally at nut level.
Which is why you don't want to get one punching
mad.
I'm going to go with
The Pink Panther 2.
That's bullshit.
It sure is.
It's your show. You can do what you want.
But there's no subtitle, right?
On that one?
Oh.
Yeah.
Hamburglar?
Hamburger?
No.
Hamburger?
No, stop it.
Hamburger?
No.
Hamburger?
Hamburger?
Hamburger.
A couple more times, Steve. Can you do a few more times for us? Hamburger? A couple more. Aumburger. A couple more times, Steve.
Can you do a few more times for us?
Aumburger.
A couple more.
Jason.
All of me.
All of me, yes.
Back and bowl.
Back and bowl.
Great movie.
He deserved an Oscar for that.
He did.
He was so good.
Never saw it.
Wow.
It's not easy to have
Lily Tomlin inside you.
I have the one in my head
that I remember
that I was researching for before. Yes. remember. Cheaper by the Dozen?
Yes.
Shit.
Cheaper by the Dozen.
Shit.
Yeah.
Okay.
Come on, Dave.
Can I ask for help?
No.
Fuck.
What's the question?
There's the one where he's the preacher.
Oh, that one.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Turn it into a Broadway musical.
God damn it. I'm going to say it into a Broadway musical. God damn it.
I'm going to say it once you're out.
There's the one with he and Meryl Streep and Alec Baldwin also.
Oh, no, there's that one.
That's a different one.
Fuck.
He wasn't a preacher in that one.
There's so many of them.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That was one of the most.
I don't know.
I can't remember the name of that movie.
Okay, so you're out then?
I'm out.
Okay.
What was that one?
I'm not going to say both of them because I only have to say one.
Oh, shit.
Yeah.
You got the other one again?
Well, I was just thinking he and Eddie Murphy, something.
Oh, yeah.
Sure, sure.
It's true.
Now you gave me a third one.
Do you remember all of those?
Mm-hmm.
Good for you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Hey, Eddie Murphy, it's a B.
What is that one? I'll give you that one, Bowfinger. Bowfinger. Oh, Eddie and Murphy, it's a B. What is that one?
I'll give you that one. Bowfinger.
Bowfinger. God damn it.
Alright, Jason. Oh, wow.
You didn't go. I said bowfinger.
I auditioned for bowfinger. Are you deaf?
Oh, I thought you gave it to Dave. I did.
No, I took it from Dave.
Dave is out. It's down to you, me,
and Matt. I'm out. We're down to the
Matt. Hoop, you did not win.
Sorry, Hoop.
Spanish Prisoner.
Yeah.
Nice. Little Shop of Horrors.
You guys are going deep cuts.
Another one that Dave was trying to think of.
Leap of Faith.
Wouldn't have gotten it.
Wouldn't have gotten it.
Didn't see it.
I can see the poster.
Of course, I'm not playing for anybody,
so it's going to come down to you two guys.
Whoever can last longer.
I love to play.
What was the third one you were trying to describe? Meryl Streep and Alec Baldwin.
He's the architect.
Jason, anything, yeah. He's the architect. Yeah, I got it, I got it.
Jason, anything?
Yeah, he did this movie with Jack Black and Owen Wilson.
Mm-hmm.
And it was called... Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.
Oh, you tweeted about it a lot?
No, no, there's...
You're just helping Matt with this one, I think.
Oh, tweet, tweet?
No, I don't know what's still with me.
Oh, he still doesn't know.
Birds of a Sky?
I think I know it.
Birds in the Sky? Incorrect. Birds in the Sky. Oh, tweet, tweet. I don't know what's still with him. Oh, he still doesn't know. Birds of a Sky? I think I know it. Birds in the Sky?
Incorrect.
Birds in the Sky.
Matt, what do you got?
I'm going to go with First Muppet Movie.
What was that called?
What's it called?
Oh, come on.
The Muppet Movie.
Yes.
Yes.
A lot of people don't know that, that it was called Oh, Come On, The Muppet movie. Yes. Yes. A lot of people don't know that, that it was called,
Oh, Come on, the Muppet movie.
Because, you know, they were just worried
people weren't going to dig the concept.
You know it.
Come on.
Come on, it's a Muppet movie.
Come on.
What's the one with...
I don't know it.
I don't know the movie.
What's not to like about this movie?
What's the one with he and Queen Latifah?
That's bringing down the house. Oh, now everybody
thinks they can jump in.
The other one that you were trying to think of
was It's Complicated.
Was he in Lonely Guy?
Uh-huh.
Was there a cheaper dozen too?
Cheaper by the dozen too, yes.
Father the Bride, Father the Bride 2.
Are we done? I can just say them now?
Yes, sure. My Blue Heaven.
Dirty Rom Scandals.
Oh, God.
Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid.
I hate myself right now.
I know.
It's tough, though.
This sucks.
The Looney Tunes movie.
Back in action.
Oh, back in action. Oh, back in action.
Oh, my God.
He's talking automobiles.
How could we?
Three amigos, of course.
Three amigos.
They made two of those, didn't they?
Three amigos.
It's so fun.
Did they make two three amigos? Which one of you guys won? There's? Three Amigos. It's so fun. Did they make two Three Amigos?
Which one of you guys won?
There's only one Three Amigos.
Walsh.
Walsh won.
The owner of the theater won.
Congratulations.
Justine Brownie, lady, come get your prizes.
Jason Nash crushed this poster.
What was this poster from?
A tornado movie.
Oh, really?
That you're in?
Into the Storm.
You're in Into the Storm?
He's the star of the movie.
Get the fuck out of here.
You're in the tornado movie?
I had no idea you were in Into the Storm.
And they gave you some posters for your good work?
Signed by the cast.
Holy shit.
There you go.
Congratulations. That's worth by the cast. Holy shit. What? There you go. Congratulations.
That's worth like $7.
Wow.
It's a good movie.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Nice congratulations.
All you see is $20, Justine.
Hey, she's my partner.
What are you doing?
Don't shake their hands.
You and I are a team.
Where's your loyalty?
She's got to work it out with Jason
how to get a copy of Jason is Married,
Jason Nash is Married.
I'm going to give the hoop back to hoop.
Is that okay?
Yes.
Everybody else, go watch all these guys
in Jason is Married.
Thank you guys so much for being here.
Thank you. so much for being here. Thank you.
Fantastic job.
Pass down those
shitheads. I got Chelsea's shithead.
Does the sandwich have a shithead on the back of it?
We don't need
Justine's because she won everything.
She won it all. What was Hoop's
shithead? Charlie didn't have a shithead.
Do you want to come give me a shithead, Charlie?
Yeah, so you have no idea what's happening.
He thinks that's a sex act, so I don't think he should give you one.
Is that like a blumpy?
Give me a shithead.
Is a shithead like a blumpy?
Should I give it to you?
It's like a mutt on the turtle.
Somebody that you would like me to call a shithead on your behalf at the end of the show.
Just say it out loud. You don't have to walk over here. It's like a car wash. Just anything that you would like me to call a shithead on your behalf at the end of the show. Just say it out loud. You don't have to walk over here.
It's like a car wash.
Just anything that you're against.
Get it together, who?
Are you for or against anything?
Okay, let's hear it.
This is so great.
Oh, I like that.
That's a really good one.
We don't know if he's for or against it.
It's a shithead, though. He's aware of it. It's definitely a really good one. We don't know if he's for or against it. It's a shithead, though.
He's aware of it.
It's definitely a shithead.
But yeah, thanks again to you guys.
And I'll be in Vegas at the Plaza Hotel
doing a Doug Loves Movies on Saturday, September 6th
at 4.20 with some awesome guests.
Douglovesmovies.com is where all my stuff is at.
Quick plug, the Comedy Attic, Bloomington, Indiana. End of where all my stuff is at quick plug the comedy attic Bloomington Indiana
end of September
what's the plug
he's just saying that's a good time of year
to just go back inside and watch some comedy
but no you'll be there for that whole weekend
towards the end of September
let's not get into specific dates
I can't remember the date
but that's cool that you
said that at all
like that's
your one loan
like foray
out into
no I'm going to
Atlanta in November
but I don't know
I don't know where
do you have a website
I do
yeah people can see
your tour dates there right
there you go
davidkechner.com
alright that's easy
to spell
kechner
yeah
I never
I never second guess
myself spelling it
it's like
it's almost as easy as Corddry.
How many R's? How many D's? I give up.
Yes, fuck it. They're the same guy.
I need more Matt Walshes in my life.
Although that could be tricky, too.
You'd probably get some misspellings.
People put in an extra C.
Never.
It's like Smith.
All right. Thank you, Jason Nash, Matt Walsh, Dave Koechner.
Thanks, Scott.
And Brock Corddry.
Children's Hospital
is only 11 minutes
long each episode.
That's what I learned
tonight.
And as always,
as always,
yeah,
everyone except
Marky Mark on
Wahlburgers is a shithead.
My boyfriend's mom is a shithead.
I'd have to agree with both of those,
but you know what I really find to be a shithead?
Childhood obesity is a shithead.
Oof.
Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold, his viewing crowd was big. Oops.