Doug Loves Movies - Rob Corddry, Paul Scheer and Geoff Tate guest
Episode Date: November 23, 2016Back at the NerdMelt Showroom in LA, Doug welcomes Rob Corddry, Paul Scheer and Geoff Tate to the show. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https...://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, squeaky babies, sticky seeds
With 50 azipop or kernels in his teeth
They're still not warm, then he won't sleep
Cause Doug loves movies
Hey, hey, hey, everybody.
My name is Doug, and I love movies.
This is I Love Movies.
It was like there was a pause, like you were waiting for another cue.
I was like, there's nothing else I can do.
I hope they do this.
Then you were right on it.
You really killed it.
Thank you.
Everyone's in the holiday spirit, I guess.
I don't know what that has to do with anything.
But we're coming to you once again
from the Nerd Melt showroom
at Meltdown Comics in Los Angeles.
It's Tuesday, November 22nd, 2016.
My question to you now is,
did any of you turkeys make a name tag?
It was funnier when I wrote it down.
Oh, wow.
We got maybe six or seven to choose from.
Oh, there's one over there, too.
Oh, Texas Chainsaw Massacre.
What'd you change it to?
Chris-a-care, or Chris-saw.
Chris-saw? The Texas Chris-saw. Chris-saw?
The Texas Chris-saw Massacre?
But the lights are really pretty.
Never seen such beautiful lights
flashing around Leatherface
in that scary-ass movie.
What's this business here up front?
Can you pass that up to me for a second?
Look at this, you guys.
Yeah, the Pop-Tarts is an unnecessary
complication.
It's in a
three-ring binder,
a plastic
three-ring binder deal.
And then it's got,
you know, you couldn't, I guess you can't
staple anything to this,
so you had to use one.
What are these things called?
What's the official name?
Binder clip?
Okay.
I didn't, you guys said it with such passion.
Abram Diary.
Because your name is Abraham?
Abram?
Okay.
And I do got to say that I like Johnny Depp
with your face in there kissing his face.
And Johnny Depp's kind of like, what?
Yeah, that's fun.
And then there's Pop-Tarts on the back.
You just hope that one of my guests is a Pop-Tart addict.
Pop-Tart-aholic.
All right.
Interspace.
I mean, interstellar.
What did you change it to?
Intericellared?
That's your name?
Isella.
That's exotic.
I mean, you could have just put that name into any title,
and I would have been like, okay.
Makes sense to me.
And you've got, like, little Christmas lights around yours, too?
Is that what those are?
Can you turn them on?
I don't know why you didn't turn them on.
Oh, that is...
They're little blue lights like it's in outer space, you guys.
Very nice job, Isela.
Good luck to you.
I feel good about you.
The guests are out back there.
They're secluded, so they don't know.
They haven't seen the name tags yet,
so we'll see what happens.
But my money's on that one.
Let me decide which three are going to get picked.
Chainsaw Massacre.
I can't say it again.
Can't pronounce it.
And Pop-Tart.
Which is, I hope all your friends call you Pop-Tart from now on.
It's a good nickname for you.
Doug plugs New York City this Sunday at the Gramercy Theater.
And then the 12 Guests of Christmas the next night has been sold out for months now. The next Douglas movies after New York City is San Antonio at the LOL Comedy Club on Saturday, December 3rd at 420.
Austin, Texas, December 12th.
And don't forget about my annual California holiday taint shows.
Stand Up, December 27th at the Irvine Improv,
and December 29th at the Punchline in Sacramento.
More dates and deets at douglosmovies.com
How irritating is that to listen to?
It's like when I'm listening to Satellite
and it goes out for a while, you know,
just go out in the middle of a sentence
and then you just wait, hoping it'll come back in.
Like, oh, shit, I hope I get to hear
the rest of this sentence.
All right, so there's one other thing, Los Angeles.
One week from tonight, Getting Doug With High is going
live in front of a live
audience at
the world famous
Troubadour
rock club in
West Hollywood it's going to be a total
rock club style Getting Doug
With High and you can go
to the link for tickets at
Douglovesmo those movies.com.
That's I'm only going to say it the one time.
Let's look at a prize bag.
You guys,
cause I'm finally getting rid of these ash versus evil dead bags.
I think I've got a couple more left.
I got a beautiful hat that was given to me by one of the Dirty Heads,
one of the guys from the band Dirty Head,
not just a person with a dirty head.
It's a really nice hat, but, you know, it's been on a dirty head.
I'm not going to wear it.
Are you kidding me?
Oh, check this thing out.
It's a magnet you can put on your car or someone else's
if you're into that sort of gag
that says Disneyland Resort Annual
Pass Holder.
Just slap it on any car you want.
A pipe from Peacemaker
is a pretty yellow one.
I love their little rubber pipes.
And then a t-shirt that I was looking at earlier
and I have no idea what's supposed to be happening on it.
And it's not really worth discussing.
You can wash down your car with it or something.
And plus all of the stuff that my guests brought.
And we got, you know, I've been saying this a lot lately,
but I'm not lying to you when I say these are three
of my favorite guests. Please give a big
warm welcome to Rob Corddry,
Paul Scheer, and Jeff Tate. You guys on the end look like a before and after ad for LASIK.
Fuck you, dude.
Fuck you, man.
I have similar black glasses I should have worn. Fuck you, dude. Fuck you, man. I should have worn... I have similar black glasses.
I should have worn...
Fuck you, dude.
That would have been awesome.
Let's meet these dudes individually,
starting with the gentleman without the glasses.
It's Paul Scheer, everybody.
What's up, everybody?
Very excited to be back.
I haven't done a Doug Benson show in a long time.
I thought I was on the outs with you.
Now I'm back in.
You thought that?
I did.
I thought you were just having a lot of life.
I thought a lot was going on with you.
I have, yeah.
I didn't want to bother you.
I appreciate it.
Well, there you go.
You know, a lot of people, I'm not going to name names, Jeff and Rob,
like to hassle me constantly about being on the show.
And it's nice to not hear from you, Paul.
I saw you at the Now Hear This Festival
with How Did This Get Made.
Yeah.
You did a really fun episode.
It was about two hours of yelling about Vampire's Kiss.
Yeah, Nicolas Cage's first going-off-the-rails performance
follows up Moonstruck with a movie
where he does an accent in for no reason.
But that is the reason.
Yes.
The movie is, I think it's calculatedly nuts,
but others would argue that it's just nuts.
I would argue that it's like two guys
making an independent film going,
wouldn't it be cool if we did this?
That would fuck people up.
And they go,
yeah.
And then the person
who was paying them
was like,
they're artists.
We'll give them more money.
Like, you know,
they just didn't know
what was going on.
But I did do a movie
with Nick Cage,
which was an experience.
You did a movie
with Nick Cage?
Yeah, it just came out.
Sorry, Doug,
you do the interview. You did a movie with Nick Cage? Yeah, it just came out. Sorry, Doug, you do the interview.
You did a movie with Nick Cage?
Yeah.
It just came out.
You're like in a Nick Cage movie?
Oh, I got full on Nick Caged.
Hey, can I, how did I, how did I?
We should present you?
How did it get made?
Yeah, it was.
That was a good one, Jeff.
Welcome to Hollywood
They don't all fly with this crowd
It was
I felt like everybody stopped to yelp the joke
Before they moved on with the show
Let's see what people are saying about that joke
Before we respond
I don't want to be on the wrong side of this
Well, you're interrupting a Nick Cage
story, so shut up.
Nick Cage
and I did
a movie together, and there was one
moment in the film that I
almost burst out laughing because
I was like, holy shit.
He's yelling at me. I'm
in the most insane Nick Cage
movie of all time.
Like I stepped out of myself to be like,
this is fucking hilarious.
And it was like, he woke up just yelling,
like we're supposed to be asleep.
And he wakes up, he goes,
the Mexicans, the Mexicans.
And he's shaking me awake.
I did not know that he was going to do that,
but we're both in boxer shorts,
and it was a lovely moment.
I don't know if that made the cut of the movie,
but I almost...
Because he yells something different
every time he woke you up?
No, it was always the Mexicans.
So waking you up might not be integral to the plot?
I mean, it sounds like it should be in the movie.
Well, the way that he was doing it was similar to like an Abbott and Costello kind of a yelp.
Because he'd be like, the Mexicans!
I'm a Mexican!
The Mexicans!
And I was like, okay.
It was so heightened.
And I was like, okay.
It was so heightened.
And then afterwards, he's like, yeah, I was doing that kind of like in the vein of Abbott and Costello.
And I was like, cool.
But that scene was an homage to that.
What's the movie called?
It's called Army of One.
It's based on a true story about a man with no skills or talent who decided to kill Osama bin Laden.
You're in that?
Yeah.
That's on iTunes.
You can download, you can watch that tonight.
Yes.
And I would imagine 50% of people would love it.
I'm going to watch that tonight. 50% will hate it.
It was directed by Larry Charles from, you know,
Curb, Seinfeld, Borat.
And it's insane.
It's an insane movie.
Tell the truth.
Nick Cage does or doesn't
have a beard in that one?
He does have a beard.
Yeah, he does.
That's Rob Corddry, everybody.
The star of Office Christmas Party.
I saw the billboard.
It doesn't have your name on it,
but your face is up there.
No.
Is it?
Yeah.
Don't you all have...
Oh, yeah, your face is in it.
Is it up there?
Yeah.
Good for me.
Yeah.
Everybody has...
It's like this guy's face
sells more tickets than his name,
and I agree.
Those extra R's in your name
are a pain in the ass.
That's probably
for the female demographic.
I'm shaking my head
for you at home.
What's the name of the guy
who plays the DJ in the movie?
Sam Richardson.
Yeah, him and you
are the only people
that don't...
Your names aren't on there
but your faces are.
Because we're the funniest ever.
Yeah, you're the ones
that like... He's the funniest person in the ever. Yeah, you're the ones that like...
He's the funniest person in the movie.
Yeah, yeah, he's always going,
fa-fa-fwa!
Fa-fa-fwa!
Yeah.
It's funny in the movie, you guys.
It's so...
All the extras...
It's not funny in this room,
because the lighting is too precious.
Just wait for the...
We were...
There was always the same 200 extras on set every day.
Oh, yeah.
And he was always up there at the DJ booth doing that.
And they would have it on there.
They would make it their ring or their...
Ringtone?
Their ringtone.
Thank you, Doug.
Thank you, Doug.
I couldn't think of the name for what that is.
Yeah.
They would make it their ringtone.
And it went on from there.
That could be a
good bit of marketing
for people at Paramount or something that can make ringtones
of that. Oh, if there was anybody from Paramount
here, maybe they could get back
to the guys, the bigwigs at Paramount
and... Does Paramount
have their own ringtone division?
They have a whole suite of Mission Impossible ringtones.
Oh, shit.
My laundry's ready.
What's the Paramount logo music?
I think that was Universal you were doing.
Oh, yeah, maybe.
Same thing, man.
Sorry to anybody that works at Paramount.
Paramount's kind of quiet, and the little stars from Paramount
go skipping across that lake underneath this snowy mountain.
Yeah, I love that.
It's beautiful.
I love that.
I like to think these are Chinese throwing stars.
You have a what?
A Jack Reacher ringtone.
Hold on, hold on. How? How a what? A Jack Reacher ringtone. Hold on, hold on.
How?
How do you have a Jack Reacher ringtone?
You know, it just is like, pick up your phone.
It's Jack Reacher.
Wait, he tells you he's calling?
But wait a minute, how long have you had that?
Pick up your phone.
It's Jack Reacher.
How long have you had that on your phone?
15 years.
If you don't pick up, I'm going to grab your head and knee you in the face
and then punch you in the balls and throw you in the river.
Here's how this is going to go.
The phone will ring.
You will pick it up.
You will say hello.
I will say hello back.
We will have a conversation.
You will hang up the phone.
I'm Jack Reacher.
That's pretty cool.
Right?
It sounds like a fun ringtone what kind of ringtones do what what
would you rather have as a ringtone paul nothing no you just don't want your phone to ring and
then later you're like i wonder who this was i think i do have a that's a pager i have a i have
a good ringtone that doesn't get people angry when it goes off at inappropriate times.
Can it go off right now?
Oh, yeah.
Hold on.
Here.
I love it.
I love it.
Or not right now.
Just make it go off and we'll see how inappropriate it is.
This might be your best episode ever.
I know, right?
When that goes off.
It's going to be a real fun payoff.
I'm so glad I'm on this one.
Well, I got to figure out how to get away.
You know how to pick them.
Oh, man.
We'll continue to talk and I'll get the ringtone going.
But our pal TJ Miller is very funny in The Office Christmas Party.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And Jillian Bell.
Yeah.
It's a rogue gallery of people who have been on this podcast.
It really is.
Yeah.
I got my ringtone ready.
Couldn't get him to come in and promote this goddamn movie,
but...
Just Corddry.
You're the one, man.
You're the ballerist
of them all.
Just Corddry.
Here we go.
Ballers.
Oh, hold on.
It's hard to...
I got a cool ringtone.
Should I go get my phone?
The new iOS is really tricky.
Do you have...
Did you just say, should I go get my phone?
Where's your phone?
I plugged my phone in back there.
Oh, it's plugged in, you guys.
If anybody wants to chat with Jeff after the show,
his phone is going to be fully charged.
Give somebody in the audience your phone number
and they can call you.
Oh, that's a great idea.
Just say it right into your microphone.
I can't figure out how come it won't ring.
Oh, man.
Sorry, guys.
You're ruining the show.
Went from one of the greatest episodes to a terrible one.
How is your ringtone just the sound of a speed bump?
It actually, well, the ringtone was actually,
you making that joke of how did this get made.
It was?
It was the reaction to it.
Oh, silence, yeah.
My ringtone is silence.
I miss a lot of calls, but people love it.
We got to introduce Jeff Tate is here.
Jeff Tate is here.
Visiting California.
Did not know he was going to be on this program tonight.
So he's been smoking weed all day.
All day.
Yeah.
All day.
We got Doug with high at noon.
And I just stayed high all day.
I got some, I got bratwurst off Grubhub.
At like 7, and then you texted, and I was like,
oh, this bratwurst gets here fast.
Like, I'd hate to have to text you at 8.40 and be like,
my food just got here.
I'm going to be late.
Do you want to hear my ringtones?
I got a ringtone from King of the Hill.
I made it myself.
Kate McKinnon is really funny in Office Christmas Party.
She's very funny.
She's very gifted.
She's good.
You guys have chemistry, you and her.
Oh, yeah. Yeah, right. Yeah. She's very funny. She's good. You guys have chemistry, you and her. Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So, which means she's like a huge star right now.
So, that means I'm a huge star, too.
Oh, yeah.
You're just... Between her and The Rock, you're a real wake rider.
Boy, I'm really like killing it right now.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Wake rider.
Is Ballers going to be more Ballers?
Is there more Ballers coming?
I don't know.
You know what?
How do they decide?
I really can't speak to how ballin' Ballers is going to be this season
because we haven't started.
But I assume it's going to be at least, if not more ballin',
at least as much ballin' as you guys are used to if you enjoy that program.
There's not going to be a dip in the ballin'.
There's not going to be the season three ballin' dip.
I hope and I assume there's not going to be
a dip in the ballin'.
There's always a dip in the ballin'.
Veronica Mars had the season three ball dip.
Season three.
Arrested Development had a season three ball dip.
That's true.
I'd like to see more people die on ballers.
Me too.
Right?
Me too.
Kill all some characters.
It's cable.
Come on.
And divorce.
I'd like them to kill some of the people too.
You want it to get more serious.
You want it to be more Game of Thrones?
No, no.
I like the light mood of the piece.
Yeah.
We're not in the business of killing people.
No.
Insecure is killing four people since it started.
We're in the business of fist bumping.
Concussions, tell the truth.
Yeah.
We yell at each other and apologize
later. Yeah. And then we
like look at each other and we nod
like you're still my bro.
We're balling. Yeah.
No, there's a lot of conflict on that show,
but no death. Yeah, that's right.
We don't traffic in that. Well, that's why lot of conflict on that show, but no death. Yeah, that's right. We don't traffic in that.
Well, that's why I don't watch.
I give you three episodes.
If no one's dead, I'm out.
Wait, Cheers is your favorite show.
Coach.
Coach died.
That's true.
That was season three.
But in the first episode, there was an old lady in a wheelchair.
And then they realized that this bar only has two stairways and no way for the wheelchair to get in.
So she died after the first episode.
By the way, I just realized that Cheers also had the season three balling with Coach dying.
Yeah, they had a season three ball dip.
It's classic television lingo, guys.
You guys are in Hollywood for a reason.
He loves TV.
I do.
Were you on Cheers ever?
Yeah.
Awesome.
I mean, let's face it.
TV's better than movies a lot of the time now, you know,
because there's less importance for every TV show to be a blockbuster like there is with film.
Was there a lot of swearing on television shows?
It kind of leveled out.
Look at how the most popular show is Walking Dead, and the violence on that is like straight up R-rated violence on a weekly basis, and nobody's saying shit about it.
Everybody's like, yeah, all right.
Yeah.
I think it's great.
They basically broke a man's head
on screen.
Oh, it's bad.
Yeah.
A guy you like.
All level violent.
A sympathetic character.
Someone you enjoy.
It's not like some dumb kid
in a slasher movie.
Yeah.
It's somebody you've really grown to,
you know,
you've grown attached to.
I thought it was fun.
Right?
I like that.
Keeps them on their toes.
Wait, are Ballers and Walking Dead on at the same time?
It's basically the same show.
Yeah, right?
The Rock is a full-on zombie.
Yeah.
I say flip over to Ballers during the commercial breaks on Walking Dead.
I'm speaking way out of turn here.
What if one of the plot points in Ballers
became that when football players get concussions,
they turn into zombies?
What if?
And then I'm fucking in.
You're speaking to the creators right now.
Please let that happen.
A whole zombie season?
Yeah.
You and The Rock have to round up the zombie players.
Corral them in some way.
I don't think there'd be a
viewer, a disappointed
viewer.
And then the whole final, the last episode of the season
is a great prison
football game between the zombie
Oh, like the longest yard.
Now you're going too far.
I feel like you're going too far.
But the zombies have better head protection.
They somehow have figured out how to not get concussions.
They've been zombies for three weeks,
and they figured out a better way to protect their brain pans.
The football players are wandering around confused.
And the refs are fucked.
No way.
Football, everybody.
I got a question for you guys.
Do you have a favorite Thanksgiving movie?
Is that even a thing?
Yeah, I have one.
What's your favorite Thanksgiving movie?
Home for the Holidays with Holly Hunter.
Directed by Jodie Foster?
Yeah.
That one?
It's a great movie.
It's the only one.
I think there's only like...
I got one.
RDJ is in that one
yeah
RDJ is in it
it's a good
it's
my
memory of it
is that it's very good
okay I don't think it is
no
anyone
can anyone back it up
is it good or bad
good
well there's
there's that
good mix
that Thanksgiving movie
it's kind of like
the army of one reaction
some people really love it
some people really hate it.
Swiss Army Man of One?
What, Jeff?
Planes, trains, and automobiles.
Oh.
Okay.
Yeah.
Sorry, Paul.
You just lost.
I know.
I guess so.
Yeah.
You win.
You win.
You win.
You win.
You win.
You win.
You win.
You win.
You win.
You win.
You win.
What about that?
What's that Michael Rappaport movie?
Higher Zebra Head?
Is it Pretty Girls?
Beautiful Girls.
Oh, yeah.
Metro.
Is that a Thanksgiving movie?
Pretty Girls?
Yeah.
I like Pretty Girls.
Stop saying Pretty Girls.
Beautiful Girls?
Pretty Girls?
I just thought they were just pretty.
I'm very much in love with my wife.
My wife.
You can't even say the name of that movie
without your wife getting a little jealous.
Who's beautiful?
Guys, I'm kidding, but seriously,
Sandy is a listener, and I love you, baby.
Just fine girls.
Oh, they're okay. Those chicks, those neighbors, they're okay those chicks
those neighbors
they're fine
that is an odd movie though
because Timothy Hutton
comes home
to kind of have
an emotional affair
with a very young
Natalie Portman
like she's like
15
she's quite precocious though
she did a lot of that
she gets inside his head man
I mean she basically does what she does in Garden State to Timothy Hutton.
But they're more close in age in Garden State.
Like, Timothy Hutton is...
And the professional, right?
She did that to Jean Reno.
Yeah.
She just gets the guy's heads.
I mean, that's what she does in that new Jackie Onassis movie.
Oh.
Was that an assassination riff?
Yeah, it was.
Watch the footage.
You know what I'm saying.
Paul, put on a pillbox hat and sit in the corner.
We need you to go hang out.
Take five on the grassy knoll.
Ooh, I love take fives.
Too far?
Oh, take fives.
Is that a good candy bar for reals?
I've always been like, I don't think I care for that. It sounds like it's got five things in it no it's delicious that's what most candy bars
only have three and for take five is done is taking the basic three and added uh two more
pretzel and something else that's you don't even know what it is you're just eating it there's
something else in there the fifth thing thing changes. It's seasonal.
They do have a seasonal take five.
They have a peppermint take five.
Not so good.
Why fuck that up? I don't need
seasonal candy. I don't like peppermint
candy. No, me either.
It's for children.
Do you have a Thanksgiving movie, Rob?
Yeah, he said
pretty good looking girls. Oh, you did. That's right. I forgot because I don't think of that as a Thanksgiving movie, Rob? Yeah, I said Pretty Good Looking Girls.
Oh, you did.
That's right.
I forgot because I don't think of that as a Thanksgiving movie.
Oh, you know what else?
I don't either.
I just had to.
It's a winter movie.
It takes place in winter.
But Paul, what were you going to say?
I was going to say there's a great documentary that no one has ever seen.
It's on the network Stars called The Chair.
And it's these two directors are given the same script,
and they're both Thanksgiving movies,
and they have to make it.
And one makes it like an American Pie-style gross-out movie
where people are shitting all over every place,
and the other one makes a really mumblecore,
really quiet movie,
but all the characters' names are the same,
and the plot is exactly the same.
Well, except one doesn't have all the shitting.
Well, right.
The shitting is not integral to the plot.
It's just the way that you tell the story.
The same story is happening.
Just one person's not shitting.
This script is perfect, but I'm going to add
he shits himself in parentheses.
What if they shit in both of them a lot,
but one, it's played for laughs for laughs and the other it's like,
oh no, are you okay?
Paul keeps going back there.
You think Paul's okay?
What did I just do is
a line that reads differently in the two films.
I do recommend. Do not
go in there.
Please don't go in there.
Zach Quinto is like one of the celebrity judges on this show.
Please watch this show.
It's my favorite show that no one's ever seen called The Chair.
The Chair.
No one's watching it because it sounds like it's about death row or something.
I know, it does.
But Zach Quinto is so offended by the American Pie version of the movie
that he takes his name off of it.
Because the celebrity people are producers of it.
And he's like, this movie is disgusting.
It's offensive on every single level.
I cannot support this movie.
It's highly illogical.
To see Zach Quinto talk about a shit movie is worthical to see Zach Quinto
talk about a shit movie
is worth a project
I know who Zach Quinto is now
yeah you figured out
who Zach Quinto is
through context
yeah it's a nice way
to figure things out
I've never heard of this movie
or whatever
but that's why
you get two Thanksgiving movies
for yourself
but at the end
they released two
Thanksgiving movies
oh so they do get released
yeah
they got released
sort of did they use real actors in them you know like when Project Greenlight Thanksgiving movies. Oh, so they do get released? Yeah, they got released.
Sort of.
Did they use real actors in them?
You know, like when Project Greenlight had LeBouf?
No, they don't have anybody that's like totally recognizable.
They have some YouTube stars.
One is made by a YouTuber, and the other one is made by an independent film person. And the independent film person went crazy, and her blog got really amazing after that show.
Okay.
Yeah, it's worth it. Go deep dive. Check it show. Okay. Yeah. It's worth it.
Go deep dive.
Check it out.
Yeah.
If you got nothing
but time.
I'm going to lose
this game.
I would like
I want to see
those two movies first
and then the show.
You can watch them.
They're both on Netflix.
That's a fun way to do it.
Yeah.
They're both on Netflix
and
But they have
different titles?
Yes.
That's the problem with it.
One's called
Shit Pants Thanksgiving.
That's the best shitting scene in any Thanksgiving movie.
Oh, man.
I really want to know the two different names now.
That horror movie with the zombie turkey?
One's called Holidaysburg.
Holidaysburg?
Yeah, that's one.
Fuck that movie.
I hope it has the same song as Vacation,
the Holidaysburg, like the Holiday Road song,
but is it Holidaysburg?
Holidaysburg.
And the other one is called Not Cool.
So that's the one with the pants shitting?
Yeah.
You know why?
Shitting your pants is not cool.
Not cool, dude.
Take that outside, bro.
It's Thanksgiving, bro.
You're going to shit your pants at the brosgiving?
By the way, that's what you should just do on Thanksgiving.
Watch both of these movies without any context.
Then know that they're the same exact movie.
Oh, yeah.
See if you can talk your family into watching.
Yeah, with your family.
Yeah, I got two great movies.
See which one of your family figures out
it's the same script.
My dad won't.
He won't.
If someone at your Thanksgiving dinner
starts talking about Trump in a really positive way,
say, I'm scared scared and then shit yourself.
You know what?
I gotta say, I know a lot of people were down on Trump, myself included, when he won.
But I gotta say, after seeing what he's been doing
these last couple days, I'm sold on it.
I feel like it's working out, yeah. I'm glad you said that,
Paul. Yeah, I just feel like he's making some
smart choices. It keeps the
24 news,
24 hour news cycle,
it keeps it exciting because there's some shitty new thing every hour.
Jerry Falwell as Secretary of Education.
What?
Oh, no.
Omarosa, head of...
Dr. James Dobson is the Surgeon General.
I've got to ask you guys about movies,
recent movies that you've seen.
We already talked about Jeff and I saw
Office Christmas Party together last night.
And Paramount had this screening
where I guess they got people from offices to come there.
And then me and Jeff.
So everyone was like
drinking beer and wine
for free
before the movie
and so they were
they were pretty festive
but they settled in
and enjoyed the movie
but at first I thought
these assholes
aren't gonna calm down
every group
had one fun guy
like they all had
their own Chandler
there was a life of the party guy
in every bunch
it was the guy
with the most colorful sweater.
No, we didn't interrupt you.
We watched politely.
That'd be fun.
We interrupted it with our laughter.
That's good.
And occasionally applause.
Did they ever wait for the applause to die down in the movie?
Yeah, yeah.
Sometimes they'd pause it.
That's good.
Yeah.
No, you know, some projectionists are really on top of their game.
They're going to put that
on the poster.
You're going to pause
this movie.
Yeah.
It does.
The dialogue comes
pretty fast and furious
and I welcome the return
of the end title outtakes.
The flubs.
Oh, yeah.
Because there's some
funny flubbers in that movie.
I bet you.
Yeah.
And funny alters?
Did you guys see Flubber It Lines?
Yeah, they do that over the end credits.
Yeah, you probably saw an earlier part of the movie.
Oh, man.
Oh, I had some classic flubbers.
Did any of my flubbers get in?
I think so, but I'm not positive.
Can we act out some of your flubbers?
There's a lot of characters.
I think the only person who definitely didn't get any flubbers in
was Courtney B. Vance.
And he's one of the greatest comedic actors of our generation.
Guy never flubs.
That's the thing with Courtney B. Vance.
You hire him, you know he's not going to flub.
He's going to bring the goods.
Yeah.
Pro.
Yeah, certainly a Christmas movie pro.
He's a Christmas...
He's definitely a Christmas movie pro
because he starred in that thing with Denzel and Whitney.
Preacher's Wife.
I like the flubs in Toy Story.
I thought that, you know, I didn't realize, you know,
I thought those guys were having a real good time there, you know.
Woody and they do that, you know, they just see him, you know, I thought those guys were having a real good time there, you know. Woody and they do that, you know,
they just see him break the third wall a little bit and just relax.
I really like that.
I do.
I always think that's funny when it's like the Muppets or whatever.
Like, oh, you didn't have to.
You like did this again.
But I'm going to go on a limb here.
Muppets can make actual flubs?
No, I just think it's funny.
Like, I think it's funnier when it's the Muppets than when it's a person.
Of course, Rob Gordy fucks up his lines.
It's funny.
I do.
No, you're right.
It's funny when it's like Kermit the Frog.
It's like, oh, dang.
I worked with Waldorf and Statler, and the two puppeteers, I guess,
have been with the Muppets for a long time.
And in between breaks of shooting, they'd be like, oh, remember?
The dark crystal? Oh, I hated that. My hand got all messed up in there. for a long time. And in between breaks of shooting, they'd be like, oh, remember the Dark Crystal?
Oh, I hated that.
Look at my hand,
got all messed up in there.
And it was like Waldorf and Statler talking about how much
they hated the Dark Crystal
very aggressively.
And I was like,
please tape that.
I would love to watch that for an hour.
Just bitching about the tough puppeteering.
I would like to find out
how come you're the only person
I've ever met in the world
that refers to him in that order.
Waldorf and Statler.
I've never heard the two names.
Yeah, but he did say them correctly.
You're totally right.
You said that wrong.
So it's Statler and Waldorf.
Okay.
No, I just found it curious.
Jeff, thank you for pointing that out.
Well, some people say Waldorf first
because that's when you want the salad to arrive first.
Boo.
You're a salad hater?
Hate salad.
What was the last movie you saw, Rob?
Oh, I saw...
Oh, I've been really looking forward to the new Twin Peaks,
so I re-watched Firewalk with me.
Really?
It's one of my favorite movies ever, Firewalk with me.
And that's all I have to say until you ask me another question.
You see your big Chris Isaac fan?
I'm not not a big Chris Isaac fan?
I'm not,
not a big Chris Isaac fan.
He's in that, right?
He is,
and he's fantastic.
He's got a big role in it.
He's a tough guy.
He disappears.
He plays,
fuck,
well,
he plays an FBI guy.
I thought I was gonna
be able to come up.
You were gonna say
the name of his character?
I thought his name
was just gonna appear
in my head.
Special Agent Peaks. David Bowie
is in that movie.
Yeah. FBI agent
Alan Jeffries, I believe, right?
Alan Jeffries?
Don't ask the audience because it just
sets the precedent.
It bumps me out when I ask them a question.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, David Bowie's
in it. It's really good.
No, it's a...
Have you ever seen that movie?
Yeah, I've seen that movie.
You don't like it.
I remember that Chris Isaac is in it.
Keeper Sutherland.
I've never ever seen Twin Peaks.
I don't know anything about it.
You go to hell.
And I've been really thinking,
is that something I should get into now
or will it not hold up
because Showtime
just put them all
back up
watch the pilot
watch the first one
and see how you feel
because it hits its stride
pretty fast
what it is
you should watch
watch the first season
including the pilot
which is a movie
up until
and then watch
the second season
up until
Leland
dies he dies by the way sorry to he's obviously gonna die which is a movie, up until, and then watch the second season up until Leland dies.
He dies, by the way.
Sorry.
He's obviously gonna die.
Fuck it.
Who cares, man?
I'm just telling them what to do.
Watch it up to that point
and then stop
and then watch Fire Walk with me.
Okay.
That's,
these are your instructions.
All right.
And then he never has to go back and watch the rest
of the series?
No, no. You don't have to watch. The rest of the series is
fucking garbage.
But also then, there's a book
called The Secret History of Twin Peaks.
Which just
came out. Which is
fantastic.
Yeah, I'm reading books now about
the series. I'm very excited about it.
You got any cool message board links?
Yeah.
Oh, Reddit.
Reddit, r slash Twin Peaks a-hole.
Paul, what about you?
Have you seen any movies lately?
Yeah, I saw Doctor Strange, but I'm sure you talked about that.
So I will talk about another movie I saw that I really enjoyed,
which was The Shallows with Blake Lively and a shark.
And I thought, oh, this is going to be great, dumb.
And it's kind of really good.
Very watchable Blake Lively versus Shark movie.
If you're like,
because you're like,
she's on a rock
and there's a shark
swimming around.
What are you going to do?
And she's fucking
talking to a crab
for a majority of that movie
and she's got a whole
crab subplot going on
that's pretty strong.
Does she nickname it Wilson?
I heard that's
a really good movie.
I heard it's
a really good movie
and then my wife and I
will sit down
to watch a movie and then
play the trailer and we just
can't fucking get past
it. Like, no, I can't
watch it. You know, it's the beginning is a little
tough. Like, oh, what is this going to be? And then
once you're in it,
June, my wife, she was, she
cried. My wife,
get out. You're just
Wow. There's some powerful acting in it. I cried. My wife. Get out. You're just...
Wow.
There's some powerful acting in it.
Woman v. Shark.
Woman v. Shark.
Oh, boy.
Go ahead, Jeff.
Did we just do that?
Does her character start off very shallow and then learn a lesson?
By the way, I wish.
She seems pretty grounded at the top.
Hey, Rob Corddry, stop Waldorf and statling me with all the booze over there.
Okay.
What are you applying right now?
What's happening?
A little Vaseline intensive care.
I was super dry.
It's dry in here.
Right? Audience, fuck you here. Right, audience?
Oh my God, let's rush him.
Let's rush him over to the Vaseline Intensive Care Unit.
That was pretty good.
Yay.
Yay.
That was good.
That was good.
I'll pull up my Carmex.
I only boo when I feel it.
All right, here's the part of the show
where Bert Kreischer turns it off because I'm about to say
let the games begin
we have got a dazzling array
of name tags for you guys
to choose from
there's about five or six of them out here
and
it's pretty cocky right there
it's a cold California night can I say that the two of them out here. It's pretty cocky right there. It's a cold
California night. Can I say that two of them are
lighted? For the first time, two of them
are, at least from what I've seen.
We get lighted ones a lot, but
it seems to be working on you, Paul.
They got your interest.
I'm like a monkey. Oh, burn after
reading and reading is spelled. That's your last name?
R-E-I-D? Your first name is
Reed? Oh, okay. I guess that happens.
Jeff, go ahead and go
pick a name tag.
Remember that part of the show? You've been on a lot.
Everybody, but if you go
first, maybe everybody else will figure it out.
Can we all just go out?
Just go grab the one you want to play with.
There's not a lot to choose from,
but that...
I think my predictions are already turning out wrong.
I've already picked two I didn't expect to get.
I went for the underdog.
Rob, they put lights on theirs, Rob.
I know, I wanted that light, but then I felt bad about it.
What's wrong with you, Rob? You've put lights on theirs, Rob. I know, I wanted that lights, but then I felt bad about it. What's wrong with you, Rob? You got lights on.
All right, he's got something.
Looks like it's framed, so that's exciting.
The lights did not win tonight, neither lights.
I'm periscoping to 360-some people right now.
And I'm ignoring all of their comments.
I hope they're not saying anything mean.
Ooh, there's an egg.
I'm going to block it.
Okay, so who are you playing for there, Jeff?
Caitlyn.
Caitlyn.
No Caitlyn for old men,
which is just...
That's just a good life...
Yeah, that's good.
Good motto.
It's a good mantra.
Good for you, Caitlyn.
Yeah, don't get involved with old men, Caitlin.
And what do you got there, Rob?
This is the best.
Oh, it's the best?
Well, let's talk to Paul first real quick.
Okay.
What do you got, Paul?
He's got the best one.
Yeah, mine seems to be, well, Wiener?
Oh, it's Weird Science.
Well, it's Weird Science, but it's Wiener Science,
but you are the Kelly LeBrock character
but I don't know
what the guy's name is
of course I am
and there's no
there's no asshole
on the back
wiener science
there's no shithead
on the back
no shithead yeah
I hope there's no asshole
on the back
alright Rob
the best one
here it is
okay this is from
who am I playing for
what's your name
Mark Mark I want to pick the lighted side Mark it's probably All right, Rob. The best one. Here it is. Okay. This is from... What's your name?
Mark?
Mark?
I want to pick the lighted sign. Mark.
It's probably...
Is it Mark Wiener?
You blew it.
His last name's Wiener.
Why didn't you just get a poster for that documentary?
Sausage Party.
What is it, Rob?
This is from what I can only imagine is the best teacher in the world, Ms. Mun.
Moon.
Moon, sorry.
Ms. Moon.
Sorry, Ms. Moon.
This is Ms. Moon, and it's her class picture.
That's it, Ms. Moon.
And it says, wait, it says on it,
it's got a picture, it says,
Yates School,
super teacher.
The thought of you will
forever occupy our minds.
We love you, Ms. Moon.
That sounds like
she died and then they put that together.
No, she gave it to me.
They worded that in such a way that it sounds like she died and then they put that together. No, she gave it to me. They worded that in such a way that it sounds like the class... Hey, fuck you, man!
It sounds like the class spent a lot of time occupying Wall Street,
so they worded that phrase right there.
You will occupy our minds forever.
I do want to talk about two things in that picture that are not being mentioned.
That picture looks like a Wes Anderson movie.
It's in a Superman costume.
Yes, she's in a Superman costume.
She's a super teacher, that's what it says.
The slogan you just read
is a cartoon caption coming out of only
one kid's mouth.
His mom made it.
His mom made it.
Nice.
Now we know how that got made.
You finally learned how something got made, Paul.
Yeah.
Hey, Rob, have you been on How Did This Get Made?
You must have been.
You guys are pals.
Yeah, I've been on that.
Which movie did you talk about?
We watched two Hulk Hogan movies. Yeah, you did them back are pals. Yeah, I've been on that. Which movie did you talk about? We watched two
Hulk Hogan movies, didn't we? Oh, yeah, you did them
back-to-back, yeah. Yeah, I did back-to-back
Hulk Hogan movies. No Holds Barred, maybe,
and the one where he throws the dog in the...
Mr. Nanny. Who knows?
Mr. Nanny? Yeah.
Yeah, yeah. Was it in Suburban Commando?
Yeah, was it Suburban Commando?
No, not Suburban Commando. That's the one where he walks
around without any underwear on, right?
Yeah, it was the worst nine hours of my life.
Oh, shit.
Your daughter really enjoyed Mr. Ned.
Yeah, she did.
No, I really studied those movies.
That really rubbed salt in the wound, though, right?
Like, I heard you hate it
when your daughter has a good time.
I don't know.
All right, I'm going to shut off my Periscope.
Goodbye, Periscope.
I just got to get out of this before it gets too ugly.
Bye, Periscope.
Bye.
That was fun.
All right, so that's who you guys are playing for.
These kids all in pajamas?
And what did you...
No, man.
What did you... She said yes. They are? They're wearing their pajamas kids all in pajamas? And what did you... No, man. What did you...
She said yes.
They are?
They're wearing their pajamas,
all the kids?
She's the best teacher.
Yeah.
Hey, kids,
let's wear our pajamas today.
Best teacher of 2013.
That's how you win
a best teacher award.
You let everybody
wear their pajamas.
What'd you bring
for the prize bag, Paul Scheer?
I brought two name tags
and so what you can do is
if you want to play a game of like make believe
one says hello my name is Frank
so you can automatically become Frank
and the other one says hi my name is Debbie
so you can put either one on
it's like a disguise thing
it's great for Halloween it's great for social engagements
it's just a fun thing you can do
you just put this on and, you know,
Jason Bourne it for the night.
So that's what I'm giving.
I can't believe we started with the best prize first.
Yeah.
It's even, Frank and Debbie are even written
as if the Sharpie was running out of ink when you wrote it.
You know, and that's kind of the fun of it.
That's part of the fun, for sure.
Then that's a conversation starter.
You might recognize that Sharpie from backstage, too.
Oh, okay.
I recognize those name tags from backstage.
People are going to see you walking around in that Frank name tag
and think you got to the event later than everyone else,
so your name tag got written later.
So, like, you're extra busy.
That's a great point.
Yeah.
Just turn his microphone off.
People are sad. Like, somebody in the booth is really going to turn off microphone off. People are sad.
Somebody in the booth
is really going to turn off
one microphone.
Rob, what'd you bring
for the prize bag?
Hold his name tag
slash just a frame picture
of a super teacher.
I brought a bunch
of great stuff.
Don't look at that.
Because I always show up
without anything. Right, so this time you went overboard. And I felt like there was a,. Don't look at that. Because I always show up without anything.
Right, so this time you went overboard.
And I felt like there was a...
Yeah, I went way overboard.
All right.
And I felt like you...
I had a moment...
Paul went underboards.
This is perfect.
He went underboards.
I thought that you might not like me anymore.
I blanked.
So I got a Office Christmas Party t-shirt.
Oh, that's beautiful.
I'll hold that up.
That a Paramount representative gave me right before I went on stage. It's extra small Oh, that's beautiful. I'll hold that up. That a Paramount representative gave me
right before I went on stage.
It's extra small, so that's good.
Yeah.
And then I have a hot tub time machine Blu-ray.
Unrated.
Unrated.
We're going to see some Corddry dick.
Oh, shit.
And then I got what else?
Oh, the book.
The Warm Bodies
book. Warm Bodies
the book. It's actually the novel
that the movie was based on.
It's really good.
Okay.
So enjoy that.
You're not going to win.
This is a Yakov
Smirnoff comedy album and it's Is your character in the book? You're not going to win. This is a Yakov Shmirnov.
Oh, of course it is.
Comedy album, and it's actually signed to Rob Yakov.
Wow.
Whoa.
Yeah.
Probably just a friend of yours probably liked that.
Starring Paul Scheer.
Oh, my gosh.
What have we got?
Blackballed.
Oh, my gosh.
Blackballers.
Classic paintball comedy film.
Classic paint...
If you like paintball comedy,
don't watch any other movie.
It's a genre that never caught on,
but it was definitely at the top of it.
It does have the best cast.
It's got the best...
I've seen that movie.
Of course.
Everybody that you see in movies today
is in that movie.
Then this is a...
Everybody what?
Everybody.
Everybody that's in movies was in this movie. The cast of Christmas Party is in that movie. Then this is a... Everybody what? Everybody. Everybody that's in movies
was in this movie.
The cast of Christmas Party is in Blackball.
Yeah.
Except for Courtney B. Vance.
Courtney is actually great in Blackball the movie.
Children's Hospital
Softball.
Oh, that is...
Softball shirt that
was given to me by the captain
of the Children's Hospital softball team,
and I never played.
But it says Corddry 49.
You guys get 49.
Wow, you brought a lot of stuff.
I got one more thing.
This is good.
This is the whole thing is this.
I could have just brought.
This is a.
Oh, no.
Yeah.
It's an actual smock that you wore
on Children's Hospital
this is the actual
schmock
this is an actual
shirt that was
used on
Children's Hospital
with the blood
and everything
nice
this shirt was on
my body
it was on my body
thanks guys hey thanks guys what do you have It was on my body. Thanks, guys.
Hey, thanks, guys.
What do you have, Jeff?
It was on his body.
It was on his body.
I did want to just talk about this hot tub time machine
unrated Blu-ray.
The cover picture is not of any of you.
It's all of the children version of you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You would think that would be a great marketing decision, right?
Yeah, like when you look at it,
I looked at it,
and I went, wait, what?
And yeah, you think it's a ripoff
of Hot Tub Time Machine
when you look at it
because you don't recognize
anyone on the cover.
Right, no.
At the time,
none of us had any problems
with that at all.
That the people playing
the younger versions of us
were on the cover of the DVD.
We were totally cool with that at all. That the people playing the younger versions of us were on the cover of the DVD. We were totally cool with that.
I'm being sarcastic, Doug.
Did you and Cusack
and the others
get together and bitch?
Yeah, all the time, man.
All the time.
Yeah.
What'd you bring, Jeff?
I mean,
we could just like
let mine be a surprise later, right?
When they get home.
I just brought a copy of my album.
It's not...
It's called Again.
You have to say it that way.
Again.
Yeah, yeah.
Still, it's great.
I mean, it's no shirt from a TV show, but it's great.
It's a good...
But you can wear it, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, I mean, I'll give you a shirt.
You got an outer garment.
Let's put your shirt in the bag.
Sure, after.
I don't know if I got sweaty or not yet.
I don't want to find out after I've given up the top shirt, the camo.
Well, good luck to Paul and Jeff tonight because I want Rob to win.
Thank you, Doug.
I won't.
This game is rigged.
Ha!
Thank you, Doug.
I won't.
This game is rigged.
Ha!
And we're going to start with a little ditty called Doug Loves Musicals.
Woo!
You don't all have to love it.
So this is just, you guys get to guess as often as you like.
I'm going to start listing the songs from a movie musical.
And as soon as you think you know it, guess as many times as you want.
First person to get it right wins.
What movie musical has these songs in it?
A song called Christmas.
There's another song in this musical called Amazing Journey.
Singing in the Rain?
No.
There's our friend the cricket is here
in the showroom tonight.
There's nothing that makes you feel like your career is going better
than the sound of crickets
during parts where there's not supposed to be laughter anyway.
Oh, champagne.
There's a song called Champagne in this film.
Oh, fuck.
Wait.
Did you ever do a musical episode of Children's Hospital?
No.
Because there's a song in this movie musical
called There's a Doctor.
Which is an interesting song.
There's a doctor.
Where? Over there.
How can you tell?
He's wearing a bloody shirt.
Terms of Endearment, the musical?
Patch Adams
There's another song
Called Mother and Son
Oh
With an ampersand
Cat
Hamilton
God you guys are
Naming movie musicals
That haven't been made yet
Miracle on 34th Street God, you guys are naming movie musicals that haven't been made yet.
Miracle on 34th Street.
That's been made, but it wasn't a musical.
Extra, extra, extra.
Newsies?
Noses.
Pippin.
There's a song in this movie musical Called Go to the Mirror
Wait
Robin and the lady in the front row
Just made each other have orgasms
Go to the Mirror
I know
That's the only song that was good from this movie
Oh really?
That was the good one?
That was the good one.
Here's another song.
Sensation.
Stop saying songs.
Not sensation, right?
Sensation?
Sensation.
Oh, here's another great song from this movie.
TV Studio.
Oh.
No, I don't think it's what we
were thinking it was. Not Xanadu, right?
Really? No. You're gonna
get it eventually.
Because, you know, a lot of times the title of the musical
is in one of the songs.
There's another song called Welcome.
Yeah.
I think it goes,
Welcome, hello, how do
you do?
Hello, Dolly.
That's not how it goes.
Oh, We're Not Gonna Take It is a song in this movie.
Rock and Roll High School?
No, Rock of Ages.
Jesus Christ Superstar.
That's not what I was thinking.
I don't think it was what I was thinking.
Jesus can't say, we're not gonna take it.
I don't think it was what I was thinking. Jesus can't say we're not going to take it. I don't think Jesus sang that song.
Well, he is dying for all of our sins.
It's everyone else's sin.
Yeah.
So not hair.
No, not hair.
There's a song in this movie musical called Sally Simpson.
The Simpsons.
No.
The Simpsons movie. There's another song called cousin Kevin the the Tommy Tommy is correct
Jesus Christ how weird are all those song titles in that movie?
Such a weird one.
We did.
The next one, which I thought would definitely be the giveaway,
is Pinball Wizard.
Yeah, oh, thank God.
And then, of course, there's a song in it called Tommy, Can You Hear Me?
So that would have really given it away.
If we got to that one. Under the wire.
Right under the wire.
Yeah, you did it, man.
Oh, cordial.
My new ringtone is going to be you saying,
stop saying songs.
I'm going to make that a hashtag for this episode.
Stop saying songs.
Do that over on Julian Loves Music.
All right, so Rob won that game,
so he gets to go first in this next game.
It's a fun new game called Zoe K or Zoe Nay.
I'll name a movie, and you tell me if it features Zoe Kravitz,
Zoe Kazan, or neither.
Got it.
Ready for this one.
So I'll start with Rob,
and then if Rob doesn't get it right,
Paul can steal.
And then, of course, if Paul doesn't get it right,
then it would be too easy
when it's narrowed down to just one.
So, yeah, so then Jeff would have to start with a new one.
Are you ready, Rob?
Kravitz, Kazan, or neither?
It's kind of a funny story.
Kazan.
Incorrect.
Paul Scheer.
Neither.
Incorrect.
It's Kravitz.
I would have got that.
Jeff, I don't care.
You're first, Jeff.
Ruby Sparks.
That's easy.
It's an easy one, Jeff.
Softball, go.
Kravitz, Kazan, neither.
Kravitz.
No.
Rob.
Oh, because it does that way?
Yeah, it sure does.
Kazan. Kazan.
Kazan is correct.
Cordial.
I guessed that.
Paul Scheer, dope.
Kravitz.
Correct.
Thank you.
Jeff Tate, our brand is crisis.
Kazan.
Correct.
Rob.
Yeah.
27 Dresses.
Kazan.
Incorrect.
Paul.
Neither.
Correct.
Bam.
Back on the board.
Who's the last person I was yelling at?
Oh, Paul. Okay.
So then it goes to Jeff.
Julie and Julia.
Kazan.
Incorrect.
I don't know who either of these people are. Me either.
I don't either.
I don't either.
I have a vague idea of who Zoe Kravitz is.
It took me a minute to figure out you weren't saying Kazam.
Either of them is a shack.
That's why I guessed Kravitz first,
because it was the only one I knew for sure I could say right.
Me too.
Go ahead, Doug.
Julia, Julia, neither or Kravitz?
Me?
Yeah.
Julia.
Neither.
That is correct.
Oh, man.
So, everybody got something right.
Yeah, we're great.
Cordray.
And Paul and Rob, they tied.
They both got two right, so didn't really accomplish anything.
But it was just fun.
Zoe Kravitz is the insanely beautiful offspring
of Lisa Bonet and Lenny Kravitz.
Yeah.
She's one of the girls in Mad Max Fury Road.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
Okay.
So you know her.
And she's the girl in Dope.
Did you see Dope?
I did see Dope.
Yeah, she's the girl.
What about the other one?
Zoe Kazan?
Kazan was in Ruby Sparks
and Our Brand is Crisis.
Dirty Grandpa.
And she's in the movies.
Vampire Academy,
the new Kumail movie.
She's in a lot of stuff.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, she's Kumail's
girlfriend in a movie
that's based on
Kumail and Emily, right?
Yeah.
She's Emily.
She's Emily Gordon.
Personified. Yeah. Oh, I feel bad now. So in the future, get ready for Yeah. She's Emily. She's Emily Gordon. Personified.
So in the future,
get ready for it.
Oh, shit.
Get ready to know
who Kazan is.
But a granddaughter
of Elia Kazan?
Probably.
I believe so, yeah.
Member of the Kazan dynasty?
Yeah.
Gotta be.
That's why I thought
she was
obviously gonna be
from earlier movies
and not current movies
didn't pan out that way
yeah no
she's a current young
youngish person
yeah
I thought
Vampire Academy
would have been good
because that would have been
a real tough one to pick
I was hoping one of them
was clearly from the 50s
right
like that would be the way
I would do well.
We'd be like, on the waterfront.
And I'd be like, all right, it's not Kravitz.
Kazan.
Yeah.
What's the next game, Doug?
The next game is Last Man Stanton.
And we're going to start with Rob.
And we'll switch the order around.
It'll go Jeff and then me and then Paul, because I love to play along.
And this is a little last man standing tournament.
We've got time to play to two points.
Oh, Jesus.
In each round, you get one lifeline, and that's your person whose name tag you chose.
So get ready to reach out to Wiener.
Best teacher of the year.
Or Caitlin or Super Teacher. Best teacher of the year. Or Caitlin. Or Super Teacher.
Miss Moon, best teacher ever.
Super Teacher.
Teachers should be paid more.
Not under this administration.
Children are our future.
I can't get enough of this politics.
But you know, the new Secretary of Education,
he's going to let the only day you have to go to school is on Sunday.
You only
have to go to Sunday school.
A little upside there for the children.
Man.
That sucks.
Alright.
Even as a joke, that's so depressing.
Can you believe it? You can't go to the mall anymore
on a weekday because kids will be there?
It would suck. Listen, don't get me started on weekday mall trips.
For some reason, it seems like nobody has any jobs.
The safe word is Donnie.
We won't have enough time for a two-point tournament
if we don't go.
So the first person out in the first round
gets to pick the actor or actress we use in the next round.
So the first person.
Total strategy.
The first person to fail in this first round.
I'm going to be that person.
Yeah.
So think of somebody, an actor or actress that nobody else is going to know all their credits.
You guys could say yourselves.
Everybody but Jeff.
I'm pretty sure that I'm the only one that's been in a movie neither one of these two have heard of.
Yeah. That's it. But that's your credit. Yeah. And if I get to go first, I'm the only one that's been in a movie neither one of these two have heard of. Yeah, that's it, but that's your credit.
Yeah, and if I get to go first, I fucking get the one movie.
And then we're out.
Check that box.
Oh, that's a good point.
That's a good strategy for you.
You're probably in Black Bolt.
I like it.
I'm in Black Bolt.
Everyone's in Black Bolt.
I saw it at the premiere.
So we're going to get the first name from somebody in the audience.
We went together.
Donnie.
And his name is, oh, this happens quite often that I talk to somebody in the audience
and then they're the person that I picked ahead of time.
Reed Hartley.
Right there with the, you had Reed is the name that was on your name tag.
So where are you in from here okay your name is reed hartley
you sound like that's a that's the name of a tv doctor
that's it you can go
just wanted to make my joke.
Reid Hartley, attorneys at law.
Okay, so what's your suggestion?
Mr. Jason Schwartzman.
Jason Schwartzman.
Okay, that'll be a quick one.
I mean, I love Jason Schwartzman,
but he's got a tricky resume.
He's got some big ones, and then lot of ones that are like quirky little.
I've said too much.
Rob?
Rushmore.
Any movie, Rushmore.
Just start right at the beginning.
Start strong.
First movie he's ever in, I believe.
Possibly. And then we go to Jeff.
Jason Schwartzman.
Are you getting stumped already? Jason Schwartzman. Now I got this for sure.
Are you getting stumped already?
No, I know for sure who Jason Schwartzman is.
Oh, I like it when this happens.
You have such weird pockets.
You've got weird holes in your knowledge
if you're not quite sure who Jason Schwartzman is.
He, of course, starred in Rushmore to be the first clue.
Yeah, he's very precocious, right?
That's what he does.
He's like, not dumb, but not into school.
Yeah, but he's been an adult in most of the...
He's been an adult in most of the films he's been in.
You don't call an adult precocious.
You'd do if he's in every Wes Anderson movie.
They're all fucking precocious.
Yeah, but that's the word you'd describe.
That describes a young person who's ahead of their...
Just name a goddamn Schwartzman movie.
The Grand Budapest Hotel.
There you go.
There's weird applause for that one.
Paul.
Oh, I get to go.
Sorry.
The Grand Budapest Hotel.
I'll go with Shop Girl.
Paul?
What did you say?
Shop Girl.
Okay, great.
Darjeeling Limited?
Mm-hmm.
Fuck you, Paul.
You know, but if you're in a hurry,
take the Darjeeling Express.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh. Rob? Yeah. Yeah. Rob
yeah
yeah
you can use your lifeline
I know
you can go to Super Teacher
I think it has to be movies right
cause I have
yep
feature films
featuring Jason Schwartzman
feature films
mmhmm
geez man
that's
not the it gets tough doesn't it Featuring Jason Schwartzman. Feature films. Mm-hmm. Jeez, man. That's... Not the...
It gets tough, doesn't it?
Let's go to your lifeline.
Oh, okay.
You just want to end this show.
Ms. Moon.
Scott Pilgrim vs. The World.
Thank you, ma'am.
Scott Pilgrim vs. The World.
You're going to go with that?
Do you believe her?
I believe her.
All right.
It's correct.
Jeff.
Funny people.
Yes.
Yes, indeed.
Funny people.
Oh, damn.
You guys were probably both in that movie, right?
That's right. Yes, indeed funny people tab you guys were probably both in that movie
Were you in that movie no no
Were you in the movie? No, but you just came out of nowhere with Funny People.
Yeah.
I don't even remember him in Funny People.
Yeah.
He was one of the comics in the first part.
He was. He was.
Okay.
What?
What's happening, Jeff?
He was in that show, Hey Teach, in the movie Funny People.
He got put in that show.
Yeah.
He was the guy, the comic amongst all the friends that was successful.
Yeah, the other guy.
And Seth Rogen thought he was a sellout.
Oh, man.
I love comics who have only done stand-up for four years and what they care about.
You're sold out.
He's on a television show, dummy.
This guy works at Ralph's.
Yeah, but it was a really bad TV show.
So? All right. this guy works at Ralph's yeah but it was a really bad TV show so alright well we know where your
values are now as an
entertainer you just do any fucking thing
just cause it's a TV show yeah
okay
it's good to know
but I'm also just stalling cause Jason Schwartzman
that's a tough one
I think he's in a couple independent films
that have quirky titles.
Ah! Ha ha!
Seven Chinese Brothers.
What?
Yeah.
I know, and I watched that whole fucking movie.
Not even one Chinese brother.
There's no Chinese people at all.
Yeah.
It's crazy.
A movie called Loser.
It was like a 1990.
There's at least one loser
in the crowd
that agrees with you.
Loser.
Rob, you got any more?
I feel like it's gonna
come to me, Doug.
But you're
really
putting the pressure on
you're moving faster than I've ever seen you move before
and I'm
thinking about a movie right now
and it also stars
a bunch of other people
would you rather compete in a mannequin challenge
right now
do you want to see who can remain still
for the longest?
Yeah.
Would that be a better competition for you?
Yeah.
One guy in the back clapping for that.
Great podcast.
The mannequin challenge podcast?
Yeah, the mannequin challenge podcast.
Oh, wait.
It sounds just like Paul's ringtone.
I am gonna say...
You're funny, Jeff.
Don't be in a TV show that's not funny.
Okay.
But what if I can make that show funny?
That's what Jason Schwartzman thought,
and the show sucked balls.
That was the point. And that's why he does Mozart in the Jungle now, funny. That's what Jason Schwartzman thought and the show sucked balls.
That was the point.
And that's why he does Mozart in the Jungle now because that show is at
the top of the comedy game.
Amazon original. Check
it out. Right after you finish
Goliath.
Then Red Oaks.
Those shows are supposed to be good, right?
No, they are. I mean, yes.
Red Oaks is supposed to be really great. good, right? Yeah, no, they are. I mean, yes. Red Oaks is supposed
to be really great.
That was weird sarcasm
you were throwing down.
I know, yeah.
Oh.
Just really proselytizing
about Amazon.
You got one?
You got one?
I got it.
Godfather 3.
He's the fucking baby?
He's a little, no.
Sofia Coppola was the baby.
In Godfather 3?
Well, yeah.
She had a relationship
with Andy Garcia, but she was a big fucking baby. In Godfather 3? Well, yeah. She had a relationship with Andy Garcia,
but she was a big
fucking baby.
Oh, okay.
You meant like her attitude.
She was a big baby.
But Jason Schwartzman
was one of the little children.
Okay.
He says confidently.
I think your smug tone went off.
I'm sure he's in that movie.
Somebody look it up.
It seems like nobody look it up.
It seems...
I'm just saying you got that past me
if it's not true.
The corrections department
will deal with it tomorrow.
He's in that,
and so is Nick Cage.
He's not.
Prove me wrong.
I can. I can.
I can see Schwartzman being a baby in there.
Wait, we can just say we can see it?
Is that the new rule of the game?
At the wedding.
Did you lie effectively?
Yeah.
At the wedding scene at the very beginning,
John Savage is there.
You got the whole deal.
You got all the guys, all your friends.
Whose turn is it?
There's a bunch of little kids running around.
Is it your turn?
One of them is Jonathan's turn.
Yeah, I mean, it depends on...
Jeff's turn.
Yeah.
Go.
The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou.
I don't think he's in that one.
He is in that one.
He is in that one?
Oh, I don't know.
I can't...
I can't picture him in a red hat.
So you're out, Jeff.
I'm out.
Jeff's out.
I'm going to go with Moonrise Kingdom.
That's probably what I meant.
That's probably what you meant.
Thanks for the assist.
Paul?
Okay, great.
Thank you.
Do you want to use your lifeline?
You want to go to the wiener?
Yeah, I'll go to the wiener
Slackers
Slackers
Fuck you, the wiener
That was a good job, wiener
Okay, there is no Godfather 4
To save your ass this time
Nope
You got anything?
The Jonathan Schwartzman documentary.
Oh, it's about his brother, Jonathan?
No, I'm out.
I'm tapped.
Okay.
Yeah, I'm going to tap as well.
So Paul wins that round, everybody.
I had a real good one
if I was going to get kicked out, too.
A real good actor to give you guys.
Oh, yeah?
All right.
Well, maybe you'll get kicked out too. A real good actor to give you guys. Oh yeah? Alright, well maybe
you'll get knocked out
in this next round.
More than two rounds? Yeah, we're playing to two points.
Yeah, and
Rob gets to pick.
I think I was out first.
Yeah, but I like Rob better.
He brought a better gift for the bag.
He didn't bring his CD again. I get to pick the actor? He brought a better gift for the bag. He didn't bring his CD again.
I get to pick the actor?
No, Jeff gets to pick.
I was just joking around.
You got excited there.
Sorry about that.
Who would you pick?
Yeah, who would you pick?
No, I don't know.
I panicked.
Yeah, right?
People always do.
I'm resisting the urge to pick Rob Corddry,
because I think that could be real fun.
It could be real fun,
but I bet you he knows more stuff than he was in than we do.
I know, I'm pretty sure I'd be able to win that.
So I'm going to pick, because I've always wanted to play Steve Zahn.
Steve Zahn?
Steve Zahn.
Oh, that's a good one.
All right.
Steve Zahn.
So yeah, Jeff Jeff you start us off
It always sounds good
And then it's just like
Shit
Who starts us off?
Jeff
And then we'll go to Rob
Steve's on movies
That thing you do
Yeah
Shit man
God damn it
It's the only one
I could think of
That's a great movie
Do you want me to do
A different one? It's a great movie. Do you want me to do a different one?
It's a great movie.
No.
I can change my answer.
No, you're all choked up.
You got like Steve Zahn movies coming out of your ass.
Steve Zahn was also in... Oh, he was this really eager best friend.
Fuck, I don't know.
Oh, Beautiful Girls.
What?
Wasn't he in Beautiful Girls?
No.
I don't know.
Listen, Rob, use your lifeline.
I'm freaking out, man.
Use Super Teacher.
Miss Moon?
Paris, Texas.
Thank you, Miss Moon.
Paris, Texas.
Paris, Texas.
Sahara. Yes, Miss Moon. Paris, Texas. Paris, Texas. Sahara.
Yes, Sahara with McConaughey.
Okay, I'm going to go Reality Bites.
Let's go back to the beginning.
Jeff?
This is my favorite one.
This is my favorite Steve Zahn movie.
It's called Safe Man.
Safe Man.
Oh, that was so good.
It also has Sam Rockwell in it.
Go watch it, everybody.
Sure it does.
Rob?
There's all sorts of movies.
The guy's been in so many great movies.
I mean, he's like the best friend you see
in a movie.
And you're like,
oh, that's my...
I love seeing that kind of movie.
I don't know.
What was that one
where he was like
hanging out with his friends
and they were all like,
hey, it's crazy.
I can't.
I am out.
All right, Rob's out.
But you get to pick
the actor next round.
Paul?
I'm going to my lifeline.
He's going lifeline.
Wiener?
What do you got, Wiener?
Strange Wilderness.
Strange Wilderness.
Yes, of course.
Very good.
All right.
My turn.
I'm going to say Saving Silverman.
Damn it.
Jeff?
Forces of Nature.
Oh, with
Bullock and Affleck?
Yeah.
He played the eager best friend.
Oh, no.
A part that 15 years later would have been played by Rob Corddry.
I agree with that.
Yeah.
You market corrected Steve Zahn out of the business.
Paul, do you have anything for Zahn?
I do. It's him and Mila Jovovich on the island of Kauai
having a very exciting trek in the wilderness.
Oh, right.
It's going great.
It's going great.
And then it's like, oh, no.
Yeah.
I love that movie.
And that movie was called...
I can't think of the title of it.
Fuck the Trek.
That was the working title.
Fuck the Trek?
Wait, it might be called...
Damn it, nothing.
I don't got it.
So close.
You don't have your wiener anymore.
Don't say it, anybody.
It's called...
Shit.
Let me move on to a different Steve Zahn.
JFK.
Are you questioning it, Jeff?
No, I'm not questioning it.
Steve Zahn Jr.
He's not in JFK.
Why would Jr. be in JFK?
It's a different Steve Zahn.
As per SAG.
Do you have one more, Jeff?
Steven S. Zahn.
I'm looking at good ones right now.
I'm looking at...
Oh, no.
Oh, you're looking it up?
Jeff?
Yeah, he's in Rescue Dawn.
Yeah.
Daddy Daycare.
That one.
Wow, you really were loaded up on Steve Zahn.
He's in some crap, but he was in some great stuff.
What's the one we were trying to think of?
Getaway or something?
A perfect getaway.
A perfect getaway.
You know what the one I wanted to, which I wanted to say, was Ridiculous 6.
He's in that?
Yeah.
All right.
I'd count that even though it was for Netflix.
It's a movie.
It's a movie.
It's a feature film.
All right.
So that means that Jeff Tate's on the board with one point.
And Paul has one point.
And then Rob is here.
Rob Corddry, star of Office Christmas Space.
In theaters December 9th, have your own Office Christmas Party party
by going to Paramount.com or some shit.
Did we say the movie was perfect yet? Yeah, we did say that. Yeah, yeah. It's a good movie.com or some shit. Did you say the movie was Perfect Getaway? Yeah, we did say that.
Yeah, yeah.
Which was the working title for Christmas
Office Space.
Christmas Office Space.
That's essentially what it is.
They got Jennifer Aniston's back.
Christmas Cubicle.
I thought when the title is Office Christmas Party
so I thought it was just like a Ricky Gervais HBO special.
I honestly thought that when I first saw the title.
Yeah, you're honestly that dumb.
Good ten.
All right.
The title does have that little UK in it.
Rob, you get to pick.
Let me ask you just quickly the strategy.
Please, yes.
Let's get some strategy going.
Let's get some strategy.
So I don't want to pick somebody that's too easy, obviously.
What was the name of the one movie you were in, Jeff?
Wouldn't it be fun to do like Bill Murray?
Because then you would go really quick, and then you would start to hit a brick wall.
Yeah, that's a fun one.
But Jeff, what's the name of the one movie you're in?
I was in a movie called A Strange Brand of Happy.
Hey, Rob, check this out.
Jeff's only been in one movie.
It's called A Strange Brand of Happy.
So you could be on the board with one point right now
if you say Jeff Tate, A Strange Brand of Happy.
I don't have points?
You have no points in this particular game.
You were killing it all night.
I've been destroying this game.
You were killing it all night.
You only got to go first in this game for winning the previous game.
I want to look into the rules of this game.
I want to talk to the judges.
You're right.
You have seven points.
You're far and away in the lead.
So the strategy then, the fun strategy is to pick somebody like...
All you got to do is say, Jeff Tate is strange, kind of happy, and you're on the board.
Nah.
Nah.
All right, so who do you want to pick?
Doug, have you been in movies?
Yeah, one or two.
I can think of...
I've been in a couple documentaries.
Yeah, I think these other guys would know those too.
I'm the surprise twist in a movie called...
I'm going to say...
What was the name of your movie, Jeff?
No spoilers.
It's tough to see it, don't see it. A Strange it's not just a happy what strange strange brand of happy Jeff Tate
say it a strange brand a strange brand of happy all right Rob's on the board oh man
I'm so good at this game wait real quick go to Wiener Wiener do you have a Jeff Tate title
not in super high me not in the background of that.
No, I didn't know him then.
Are you kidding me?
No, no.
As soon as me and Doug started hanging out,
he put the kibosh on making movies.
He just stopped making documentaries.
Why would I want him in the background of a movie?
Totally ruin it.
Don't owe that.
I would ruin it.
So is it me now because it's to me?
Jeff Tate to you. Oh, yeah. You were the first one out. No, I mean, he gets the point. Don't owe that I would ruin it So is it me now Because it's to me What
Jeff Tate to you
Oh yeah
Yeah you were the first one out
No I mean
He gets the point
I get the point
Alright great
So now
That was a great strategy
So now it's a three way tie
It's anybody's ball game
Do I get to pick the person
But Paul you were the first one
To be knocked out
Because Wiener couldn't help
On Jeff Tate
Okay
So you get to pick
Hume Cronin
Wait a minute ago You were Bill Murray Bill Murray Now Hume Cronin wait a minute ago
you're Bill Murray
Bill Murray
now Hume Cronin
yeah
Hume
Cronin
alright
I kind of
I have a pretty strong feeling
how this is gonna go
there's that
Jessica Tandy
H-U-M-E
Hume
C-R-O-N
I think it's N-Y-N Cronin Cronin or. C-R-O-N.
I think it's N-Y-N.
Cronin.
Cronin.
Or maybe it's N-I-N. Is Hume short for something?
Hume.
A very common name.
It's short for humorous.
Hume Cronin.
All right.
So, Paul, you start us off.
His name is Hume.
Name a Hume Cronin.
His first name is Hume and Cronin movie. His first name is Human Cronin.
Cocoon.
Cocoon.
Rob?
Cocoon 2.
Okay.
Jeff?
JFK.
No. Nope, he's in it. He's in it. Prove me wrong. JFK no
nope he's in it
he's in it
uh oh
prove me wrong
no he's not in it
watch all of JFK
right now
he's not in it
do you want to use
your lifeline
yeah do you know
any Hume Cronin movies
do you got any Humes
Caitlin
are you sure
okay Hume Cronin
can I guess
he was the host of
2020 it was Hugh Downs Do you got any Humes, Caitlin? Okay, Hume Cronin. Can I guess? He was the host of 2020.
It's Hugh Downs and police audience.
No answers.
Okay, so Caitlin doesn't have anything.
You don't have anything.
No, I don't know who Hume Cronin is.
Smartly played, Paul Scheer.
Let me see if I can come up with a Hume Cronin.
He was in that movie...
Oh, motherfucker.
Where...
I'm going to just give some clues.
Where John F. Kennedy was murdered
and Kevin Costner was a lawyer
who's tried to solve it.
It's called JFK.
No, I think he was in a movie
that had three old guys become bank robbers.
I think he was one of them.
Probably.
The crew.
No.
Anyway, I can't think of it.
And, you know, he's been in,
if we look at his IMDb,
he's been in a shit ton of movies.
He's been in more movies than anyone
that's ever been mentioned here.
But I can't think,
maybe there was a film version of the gin game
that Playu was in with his wife, Jessica Tandy,
who was also in the Cocoon movies.
But yeah, that was well done, Paul.
I can't think of any more.
Do you have another one?
Batteries Not Included.
Oh!
Jesus.
That's that movie about the old man and the vibrator?
Yes.
And I was gonna also say Trading Places, right? He's in Trading Places? Wait, wait, wait, wait. It's still my turn. It's Rob's turn. And I was going to also say trading places, right?
He's in trading places?
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
It's still my turn.
It's Rob's turn.
Rob, what do you want to say?
Trading places.
Yes.
I thought it was over.
Plus, I don't even think
he was in trading places.
I don't think he is.
That was Tom Amici
and Ralph Bellamy.
He tricked you.
You're out.
Rob is out.
Do you want to lose your lifeline, Rob?
Yep.
Hume Cronin.
Ms. Moon?
Oh, you were? She had batteries not included, ready to go.
But you don't have anything else? No other guesses?
You're a better teacher than I am.
All right.
Jeff, do you have one?
Yeah, I've been out.
I'm just curious.
I'm curious if he's figured out who Hume Cronin is No
I'm like 90% sure it's a man
Yeah
No it just sounds like something a doctor would say
To an expecting woman
I'm sorry your baby has Hume Cronin
Oh no
Is it too late to take care of it
Is it too late to Wait wait of it? Is it too late to...
Wait, wait. He's probably in 12 Angry
Men, right?
You gotta figure. All those guys
are in 12 Angry Men.
Towering Inferno.
Paul, are you looking it up?
Yes. What did we miss?
It's Cocoon the Return, not Cocoon 2.
Oh, shit.
The Pelican Brief. Controversy. Marvin's Room. it's cocoon the return not cocoon too uh oh shit uh the pelican brief controversy oh marvin's room okay yeah uh let's see i'm trying to figure out i'm picking the best ones here
but he's been in a lot right he's been i mean a ton i'm gonna go back to kind of his early stuff
here he was in uh let's see, well Parallax View. Okay.
Warren Beatty. The gin game
TV movie. Oh, TV movie.
The World According to Garp.
Brewster's Millions. What?
That's what I was thinking of. Brewster's Millions?
Not Trading Places. Fuck. Brewster's Millions. Yeah.
Fuck you, Shear.
And then a movie called
well, that's a lot of TV movies.
TV movie, TV movie.
Camilla.
Those count, don't they?
No.
I still don't know who this is.
No TV movies.
Alone.
Not as many as you would think.
Night of the Hunter.
He's dead.
He was born old, Jeff.
He always played old guys.
Yeah.
Lifeboat.
The Alfred Hitchcock movie, Lifeboat.
Ziegfeld Follies.
The Postman Always Rings Twice.
The first one, not the Nicholsons.
And then, yeah.
Yeah, I mean,
have you seen the Cocoon movies?
No.
Okay, then you're out.
There's no way to tell you
who Hume Cronin is
if you haven't seen
the Cocoon movies.
But also,
there's no reason
for me to answer, are you?
No reason to go see
the Cocoon movies.
No, I'm not going to see
the Cocoon movies.
They don't hold up
the Cocoon movies?
I don't think,
I just figure.
Right? They don't? No. They're movies? I just figure. Right?
They don't?
No.
They're still good?
Brian Dennehy pulls his eye down
and a bunch of blue light shoots out of his eye?
I doubt it's good.
It's not for us.
Yeah, it's good.
Maybe I'm in it.
It's science fiction.
It's got Steve Guttenberg.
No, it's not.
Oh, I'm back out.
Never mind.
The Goot.
The Goot.
Donamici?
I'm more of a Fisher Stevens guy
Oh well alright
A mannequin
Challenge
I'll try to you know bring up a game
That where an answer is short circuit in the next show
Thank you
Since you're such a Fisher Stevens nut
And congratulations to Paul Scheer
For winning this thing
Thank you Come get your prizes wiener And congratulations to Paul Scheer for winning this thing.
Thank you.
Thank you. Come get your prizes, Wiener.
Who did it?
Oh, he won the whole thing.
You won it, man.
You did it.
You did it with your crafty Hume Cronin move.
There's your prizes over there.
Hume Cronin for the win.
Wow, man.
Who knew?
Now I play my ringtone.
It's like, who is
Hume Cronin?
What do you got to plug, Paul Scheer?
What do I have to plug? You can
check
out me and Nicolas Cage
in the movie Army of One.
yeah, that's
on the series Blunt Talk.
yeah, that's I'm on the series Blunt Talk.
With Patrick Stewart?
Patrick Stewart, yep.
Yeah, alright.
When you're in the men's room with him,
do you say, pick any stall in the aisle
and go?
Isn't he the voice of those commercials?
No?
Maybe it's Sir Ian McKellen does those commercials.
Maybe, yeah. I'll ask.
Don't ask.
You should wait until you're in the bathroom.
What?
Nothing.
Rob Cord...
Rob Corddry, star of Office Christmas Party.
It's an ensemble piece.
It's an ensemble.
Yeah, but all great people.
Some of the most fun people.
I'm like eight or nine
on the call sheet.
Was there anybody on that set
that you hated?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, tell us.
Let's get into it.
Yeah.
Oh, we don't record this part.
Who'd you hate?
Let's get into it. Yeah, we stopped the recording.. Oh, we don't record this part. Who'd you hate? Let's get into it.
Yeah, we stopped the recording.
Oh, good.
Good, good.
Oh, my God.
Who really stinks?
Where to start?
Who's the smelliest?
Who's the smelliest?
Jason Bateman.
Yeah.
What else is coming up for you, Rob?
Anything else?
Warm Bodies 2? What do you got? Warm Bodies 2? Anything else? Warm Bodies 2?
What do you got?
Warm Bodies 2, I think.
Warm Bodies 2.
No.
I like it.
Nothing.
All right.
I got nothing.
Let's do it.
Let's do it.
Give me something.
I'll do it.
Okay.
Office Christmas Party, the TV show would be good, right?
Would you do the TV show if they turned into a TV show?
No.
Would it be like a bunch of people working at an office?
Yeah.
But every day is Christmas.
Looking forward to Christmas.
Every episode is a different
office party.
We've got to figure out
this Christmas party.
Actually, that sounds like
a really good TV show.
I would do shows like
I would do Parks and Rec.
Okay.
So if they bring,
if they reboot that.
30 Rock.
Which character would you play on Parks and Rec?
I would do Saturday Night Live.
Which character on Parks and Rec would you play?
Leslie Knope?
I would play...
Ron Swanson?
I would play like three or four different characters.
Tom Halverford?
Oh my God.
He'd be good as a...
Holy shit.
Pert Happily.
Jesus.
Stop it.
John Ralphio.
Stop naming songs.
Can you grow a mustache?
Right now?
Yeah.
Yes.
By the time we start shooting...
This isn't being dragged out at all.
Let's grow mustaches.
It's happening!
You have to plug your nose.
Jeff Tate,
what do you have to plug?
This weekend, Friday and Saturday,
I'm making an album in Minneapolis
at the Comedy Corner Underground.
Friday and Saturday.
Go to that.
The day after Thanksgiving.
And Saturday.
You deserve it, Twin Cities.
And then December 1st, I'm in Shreveport.
December 2nd, I'm in Lafayette, both Louisiana.
December 3rd, Houston, Texas.
And justanotherclown.com.
All right, be careful with the weed down there in the south.
What are you talking about?
The end.
I don't smoke weed.
It's illegal some places.
Now, super teacher,
you didn't put a shithead
on the back of your framed photo
of all of your students,
which I understand.
It's probably the kid's mom
who made that.
These kids have really cool pajamas.
It's a really great looking class.
I gotta say. Looks like a really great looking class. I gotta say.
Looks like a bunch of great kids.
Back in 2013.
And you can call Trash Photos at 773-991-414 something.
Yeah.
They put together a great class photo.
To get a class photo.
Yeah.
It's like it's almost the picture is mostly window that's behind them. It's really. It's angled weird too. To get a class photo. Yeah, it's like, it's like it's almost, the picture's mostly window
that's behind them.
It's really...
It's angled weird, too.
It's a weird angle.
It's like at a Dutch angle.
How dare you guys?
These are children.
Well, she's not
the photography teacher.
She is...
She's a superhero.
You bastards.
She's probably out saving people, not these kids. So who's your shithead? superhero. You bastards. I don't like
saving people, not his kids.
Who's your shithead?
Okay. She's going
classic. Defoe?
Defoe, yeah. I saw Willem Defoe
and Mikhail Baryshnikov do
a clown play, and it was
one of the most insane things ever.
At Royce Hall, right here in LA.
A full-on clown play for over two hours.
It was a long, long.
And you did not enjoy it.
I found things interesting about it.
Like this is a two hour clown play.
Like it was like,
oh here's a 14 minute scene of Willem Dafoe getting shot
and going down in slow motion for 14 minutes.
That's slow.
That was slow.
That's like bullet time.
That sounds awful.
Come get your lovely picture, Teach.
Congratulations.
Thank you, Miss Moon.
Yeah, good job.
And one more time for all of my guests,
Paul Scheer, Rob Corddry, and Jeff Tate.
If you write about this
episode on Twitter, don't forget to
hashtag it
Stop Saying Songs.
And hashtag it stop saying songs and Doug Loves Movies is at the Improv in Tempe
Arizona at 420 on New
Year's Eve have an early New Year's
Eve night out or go do
other things you know I'm not going to make your
schedule for you
Tempe, Scottsdale, Phoenix
that whole region I hope to see
you guys out there.
And thank you to everyone for coming out tonight to the Meltdown Comics.
And as always,
Willem Dafoe is a classic shithead,
and 2016 is a shithead.
Woo!
Now it's time for Doug to watch another And 2016 is the shit.