Doug Loves Movies - Rory Scovel, Megan Neuringer and Aaron Kleiber guest
Episode Date: March 30, 2015Doug welcomes comedians Rory Scovel, Megan Neuringer and Aaron Kleiber to the show. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy...#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, skinny babies, stiffy seats with empty ads and popcorn kernels in his teeth.
There's still not one that he won't see, but Doug Loves Movies!
Hey, hey, hey everybody!
My name is Doug and I love movies.
This is Hot Moms Movies.
Coming to you once again from
that's the sound of the Nerd Melt showroom crowd
here at Meltdown Comics,
where we will also be next Sunday,
which will be Easter Sunday.
Will that stop you guys from coming?
No.
All right, great.
Here's what I wrote down just in case some of you went,
no, I can't, it's Easter.
Find some eggs, go to church, and then come by.
Like, are there really anything,
are there things you have to do at nighttime on Easter?
I remember Wizard of Oz was on every Easter Sunday when I was growing up.
I watched every goddamn time.
That wouldn't happen today.
Everyone would be like, it's all a dream.
Why do I have to sit through it again?
Next mystery.
Let's see.
Today is Sunday, March 29th. Let's see your
name tags, everybody.
If I can get some lights
up in here. Oh,
nicely done. Lots of
good ones. There's a nightmare before
Christy.
What's this blue dude
in the front row?
Batman Andy.
And it's a little row? Batman Andy. Batman Andy?
Yeah.
And it's a cute little Batman doll.
Or kind of a bat.
I don't know what he technically would be.
Batman, I don't know, he wore blue at one point, maybe.
Yellow belt?
Batman's a yellow belt?
What's the last movie you saw, Batman-dy?
You guys can put them down.
Thank you for everybody bringing those.
I didn't tell you you could put yours down.
Birdman.
Batman-dy.
Birdman was the last movie you saw?
It was the last movie that you don't know the correct title of, that's for sure.
Or The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance? Yes!
Very good.
Class dismissed.
Three in the morning, I re-watched it.
You watched it at three in the morning? Yeah, it was
a good time last night.
Oh, okay.
Came home so drunk,
you're like, I need two hours of drumming and a man
walking around in his underwear.
That's what I need right now to fucking
get my shit together. All right, Batman Andy. I have a strong feeling you will
get chosen, but we'll see what happens. I'm not always right. Since last I spoke and you
listened, I had a great, I mean quite a week. Starting with a flight delay
that caused me to miss my show
Wednesday night in Charlotte, North Carolina.
But the folks at the Comedy Zone were nice
enough to let me move the
show to yesterday afternoon
at 4.20. You know I
love my 4.20 shows.
Douglow's minis
from that show should plop in a day
or two.
We had a lot of fun with the audience playing Last Man Stanton.
We played with the films of Paul Rudd.
Yeah, and there's a lot of them.
And we missed some big ones.
Took us a long time to say Clueless.
You'd think that one would be right out of the gate, right?
So, yeah, so I, you know,
ended up having some extra time there.
I was up there for my buddy Tall John who's having a bachelor weekend
up in the hills of North Carolina.
And so that was weird.
And then I got to be one of the first people
to ride Fury 325
at the Carowinds Amusement Park in South Carolina.
Why, you ask, Fury 325?
Because that Brad Pitt movie ruined their ride name.
They were like, we can't just call it Fury.
People just think you just ride around in a tank with Shia LaBeouf.
I was like, I have nothing funny to say about this.
And then, LaBeouf!
LaBeouf to the rescue.
So, yeah.
So, no, it's because the first drop is 325 feet,
which I guess is the highest drop
on a Giger coaster in the
world, maybe? And the
ride takes 3 minutes and 25 seconds.
So I was like, well, I think all rides
should take at least 4 minutes and 20 seconds.
And then,
fuck it if there isn't
at that amusement park. It's a family amusement
park. I mean, they'll rub it in your face, but there's a
Camp Snoopy and whatnot.
There's like this
plane outside one of the rides. It's called
Afterburner, and there's this jet plane
sitting there, you know, just for
decoration. But the
number on the side of it is 420.
So somebody was having
a good time. Because that'd be a weird
mistake to make.
Not a mistake, really.
I'm going to be at be helium in Portland this weekend.
You know helium. It's a gas!
DouglasMovies.com
From the
corrections department, it was Christopher
Walken, not Bruce Willis,
who was the subject of
that Last Man Stanton where we never
got to Last Man Stanton.
So
finally that's all been put to bed.
I've gotten a lot of tweets about that.
People are really fired up about that issue.
Lots of fun stuff in the prize bag today,
but I'm anxious to get the guests out here
because I've got three regulars on the show
that I enjoy a great deal.
So please give a big warm welcome
to Megan Neuringer, Aaron Kleiber,
and Rory Scovel.
Oh!
Rory Scovel!
Oh, there he is.
Just buttoning up your pants.
What are you doing?
I just wanted to hide my prize.
Oh, you're hiding the prize.
But for those sitting here in attendance, it's pretty obvious what it is.
It's not earrings, that's for sure.
He brought a flak jacket.
Kevlar.
We don't know what it is.
Could be a number of things.
It's not a sweaty record.
My shirt could just be like this I forgot that they get cardboard out of the Old Navy shirt
Yep, I bought it, this was cheaper
Did your pants bring a phone for the prize pack?
Because that's pretty well outlined as well
That's just the fashion of these pants
There's nothing in these pants
Why isn't this joke working for more people? I should have put this under my shirt of these pants. There's nothing in these pants.
Why isn't this joke working for more people?
I should have put this under my shirt.
It would have been a similar shape.
It would have been really fun.
We've got Schmovie is in the prize bag,
you guys. The exciting board game.
How's it going again?
I always forget.
Let me give you an example
and you guys can maybe come up with one
They're not easy
Name a science fiction movie
About a gangsta lunch lady
Right?
That's hard to do
You'd have to really sit and think on that for a bit
Because there's a lot going on there
Sci-fi
Gangsta
Lunch lady
Right? It's too fucking complicated going on there. Sci-fi gangsta lunch lady.
Right?
It's too fucking complicated. Wait, is that a real movie?
No, no.
You're not supposed to think of a real one.
You're supposed to make one up. It's supposed to be funny. I went through all
of the diehards.
I was like, how many movies was
50 Cent in?
Seriously though, if you understood or if I said it properly,
you'd still be sitting there thinking, right?
That's not easy.
Yeah.
It's too complicated.
But it's like Balderdash.
Schmovie.
Schmovie.
I'm terrible at selling them.
Get yours today.
They're not a sponsor.
They just keep sending me crates of schmovie.
I got schmovie all over my apartment.
That's disgusting.
All right, so I'm going to introduce everybody.
Megan Neuringer is back.
Fan favorite, frequent at midnight contestant.
What's your favorite thing about doing at midnight?
We've done it together twice.
Yeah.
I just
love the green room.
They give you a fruit plate, sometimes a crudite.
They give you cookies at the end.
A little t-shirt.
I eat that bag of Fritos.
If they don't have Fritos
in my room, I go to one of the other rooms
and switch out with something I don't want.
I mean, if I'm being totally honest,
my favorite thing about At Midnight
is that my Twitter blows up
and I get all these new followers for free.
I'm kidding.
I don't, yeah, but for free.
I think what I like is the way you interjected.
Someone's going to think
Megan just suddenly
had a really deep voice about Fritos
I like Fritos
I'll go into any other rooms
there's crudité and I like Fritos
a lot more Twitter followers because of that
yeah that's Aaron Kleiber everybody Pittsburgh comedy phenom A lot more Twitter followers because of that.
Yeah, that's Aaron Kleiber, everybody.
A Pittsburgh comedy phenom.
He's been on two. One where the sound was damaged very badly,
and another show that was completely vanished, right?
Is that what's happened?
I don't know.
I don't know.
But he's been on the show a few more times than people would know.
And now he's out here in Los Angeles.
What are you doing in town?
Shows.
Okay.
Do you want to plug any of them?
Is it any of them after tomorrow?
I've been here a couple weeks.
You want to back plug?
You want to talk about shit you already did?
You could have seen me headline the Ontario Improv last weekend, but it's over.
How did that go?
Amazing. That place is near a
meth lab. I love it.
I'm just guessing.
I'm at Flappers
tonight in Burbank. Oh, that's also
near a meth lab.
Actually, Burbank's really...
I've been pulled over more times
in Burbank than anywhere else.
Never got a ticket for anything
But they're just pulling everybody over
Because they've got nothing better to do
Like why are you driving around Burbank
This guy's up to something
He's driving around Burbank
Maybe it's for your safety
It always works out that way
I haven't been murdered or anything by them
Speaking of which
I was wearing my hoodie.
What do you call these things?
A toque?
A scully?
A scully that says
slab life on it.
I don't know why.
People give me things on the road.
I'm like, I'm going to put this
in the prize bag.
And they're like,
oh, that'd be great.
Like this, for instance.
Some rolling papers called
Phone Homie.
That's fun
because that's kind of a movie reference.
Specifically a movie reference.
Megan brought, this is awesome,
she brought some scratchers.
Yeah, she brought five
California lottery
scratchers. So hopefully
she'll get you on the road
to a terrible addiction.
Give you a real gambling problem
if you win a couple bucks and get excited.
What if someone wins huge?
If anyone wins huge,
you have to give Megan like some of it.
Right?
For reals.
Or buy her more scratch-offs.
But a lot of them.
Yeah, like a bunch.
Like a thousand. All of the... If you win a billion dollars, you have to spend it all on scratch-offs. Yeah. But a lot of them. Yeah, like a bunch. Like a thousand.
All of the...
If you win a billion dollars,
you have to spend it all on scratch-offs.
Right?
There's a T-shirt and a lighter
from Friends of Chameleon Glass,
all in a bag from South by Southwest.
I think this is the music festival bag.
And what do you have for the bag there, Aaron?
Oh, more addiction.
Well, let me real quick ask the audience a question.
Is anybody here under 21?
Applaud if you're under 21.
Be honest.
I am.
That's interesting.
There's like a 10-year-old.
Some for the dudes.
I'm under 21.
Some for the dudes.
I'm five. I came the dudes. I'm five.
Yeah.
I came alone, and I'm only four.
I would give a four-year-old liquor.
Some Jameson for the grown-up men,
and some Pinot Grige for the ladies.
Four mini bottles of Pinot Grige.
Get nuts, okay?
I'm four, and I like Fritos.
I go into the other rooms and
trade out the fruit.
I ran out of DVDs
in California. I don't trade the Fritos
for fruit. I just trade it for like Lay's
or whatever, you know, some other brand of chip.
Because they mix it up over there at
midnight. Rory Scovel's
here, everybody. Did I introduce you yet?
No.
Just a voice in the darkness assuming someone's listening to this
in the dark, if so
rethink your life
people go to bed to it
no, no
if you're going to bed right now
wake up and fix it
I listen to DLM Now wake up and fix it.
I listen to DLM before I fall asleep,
so I dream of movies.
I forgot to smoke weed before going to sleep the other night,
and I had like a whole night of dreams.
It was so irritating.
I hate dreams so much.
I woke up like, I'm late for what?
Thank you for bringing all this
booze, Aaron, but what is the
mystery prize in Rory's
shirt, everyone? Well, if you're
listening at home or in your car
or you're about to fall asleep, you can't see it,
but you can hear it.
Nope.
Not a miniature vertical pizza box.
It's my album!
And it's
touched my sweaty
belly.
So that's neat.
Prizes exceed the bag,
you guys. That's how great the prize
pile is today. Prize bin.
Prize pile. We're calling it the prize
pile this week. Dig into the prize pile.
Let's just go down the line.
Megan, what was the last
movie you saw?
I do this show and then it just shames me because I realize let's just go down the line. Megan, what was the last movie you saw? Oh, wait.
See, I do this show,
and then it just shames me
because I realize I don't watch enough stuff.
I was just saying in the green room,
I was like,
I watch more movies in New York than LA
because I could just stroll to a movie.
Right.
But the movie I want to see is It Follows.
That's going to be my next movie.
The horror movie, It Follows?
Yeah.
Oh, it's a lot of quiet.
Let me try this again, Megan.
I have simply dumbfounded the audience
by referencing a movie that's in theaters.
I'm going to try one more time.
What was the last movie you saw?
I don't know.
That's all they want.
They don't want to hear conjecture
About what's next
I kind of liked
Knowing what you're planning on seeing
What are you catching up on Netflix?
I don't focus
Someone's going to
It follows you into the theater
No see
Probably some
Oh the documentary Citizen 4 Citizen 4 amazing documentary No, see, some kind of, probably some doc.
Oh, the documentary Citizen Four.
Yes, Citizen Four, amazing documentary.
Okay, there we go.
All right, tell us your five favorite things about it.
Mine are freedom.
No, that movie is intense because it reminded,
the whole time I was thinking of like,
it would be similar to if
All the President's Men
was a documentary where they were just following
them around while that shit happened.
It's that important, the shit that's going down
in Citizen 4.
We're taking the same movie, right? Yeah.
Is this the one where the guy eats McDonald's
for 30 days?
The Fantastic
Citizen Four.
But yeah, do you know what
Eric Snowden's up to right now?
What's going on with him? He's in Moscow with
his hot girlfriend making pasta.
And that's only because of
Meerkat that we know it that detailed.
Yeah, we're Periscope.
We're Periscope.
Not a great reference for a Meerkat that we know at that detail. Yeah, or Periscope. Meerkat or Periscope. Not a great reference for a meerkat.
I said meerkat, nobody.
Megan tried to help me with Periscope, nobody.
It's like both of you are having brain synapses at the same time, just yelling out words.
Meerkat, Periscope.
Lunchpail.
Band-Aid.
Prados.
All right.
Aaron, I hope you understand the question.
Yep.
You've had time to think about it.
Yeah, I actually saw It Follows this week.
I didn't jump in when it came up earlier.
I was letting her ride that.
I was letting her ride it out.
Guys, so sweaty. So sweaty from that.
What did you like it?
It's spectacular.
What did you like it?
What did you like it?
The man who's accusing other people of having What did you like it?
You had a synapse, man.
You should smoke some pot.
Get your brain together, man.
What did you see, Aaron?
It follows?
It follows.
I will have to say that it's probably in the top 25 horror movies I've ever seen.
Whoa!
I'm not playing around.
Give us another example of the top 25 for you so we can judge you.
Oh, my gosh.
I mean, you know them. I mean,
one other. You've got
24 choices. What other one
would be in there? Friday the 13th
part one. Oh, see that? We've already
proven that it follows could be
a top 100 maybe.
No, it's good.
The music is phenomenal. I wouldn't put any of the
Friday the 13th movies in any list
except for a list of Friday the 13th movies in any list. No. What?
A list of Friday the 13th movies.
One.
Regular.
Two.
Just a two.
Three.
The Reckoning.
I don't know.
I don't even remember.
When did they start adding subtitles to the Friday the 13th franchise?
Part two.
Really?
Was it two?
Part two had more words?
Oh, no.
The beginning?
Four?
Was it four? The beginning? Yeah. more words? Oh, no, the beginning? 4? Was it 4?
4, the beginning?
Yeah, Friday the 30th, Part 4, the beginning.
The beginning.
Final chapter.
Final chapter.
Final chapter was 4.
That's right.
5 was the beginning.
Very out of order with these titles.
Yeah, why was 4 the final?
Was it a 4-logy?
Then they were like, fuck it, send him to space.
Well, that was not until like 10
That was late in the game
Why did they have subtitles
Like the Spanish version?
No, no
No, it's
Subtitle
Meaning the rest of the title in a sequel
Oh, oh, okay
Not subtitle Like we can't understand what they're garbling about There really should be a word for it meaning the rest of the title in a sequel. Oh, okay.
Not subtitled.
We can't understand what they're garbling about.
There really should be a word for it, but there isn't.
It's just subtitle, but that does mean more than one thing, so your confusion
was not dumb.
Come down to the live show, you guys.
See the faces I make to get laughs.
Oh, come for the show, stay for the faces.
Yes, the faces.
Rory.
Hi!
What happened, Megan?
Wait, Megan just said oh for some reason.
Are you all right?
Oh, no, I'm fine.
Oh.
Oh, I thought you thought of something or remembered something.
Nope.
Had something to add.
Probably my body did something
and I was like, oh, no, I'm fine.
Rory?
I recently re-watched Man of Steel
and I did so because I hated it the first time.
And I talked to someone
and they said, watch it. You know what people do?
They're like, watch it again.
I hate the watch it again
nicks that are always trying to convince you
to watch some garbage over again.
You sit there seething the whole time.
This still sucks!
I gotta say, I didn't hate
it as much the second time.
Maybe because my expectations were in a different place. I didn't hate it as much the second time. Maybe because my expectations
were in a different place.
I wasn't looking for Christopher Reeve.
I thought
he was going to be in it
the first time I thought he'd show up.
But watching it the second time, I was like,
this isn't so bad. I have
faith in the next one.
Superman versus Batman
or whatever the fuck it is.
I just think
Batman's gonna, you know, save it
if anything.
You know, it's either gonna suck or
the Batman parts are gonna be awesome.
I just, I have so much
faith.
I just don't even, like,
this dude, did you guys
Aaron and Megan
did you see Man of Steel?
Yes.
No.
That dude doesn't
Henry Cavill?
Yeah.
I'm sure he's a great actor
and he's good at hiding
his foreign accent.
He's handsome.
He's handsome.
He's definitely handsome.
But was he
I mean
he didn't do anything
I'd rather see
Dean Cain than him.
I'm sorry. Dean Kane than him. Yeah, no, Doug.
I'm sorry. I'm with Doug.
Dean Kane is a man with the feelings.
Yeah, had a little character. So many people
are listening right now. They're about to fall
asleep. They're like, what?
What did Douglas say?
Dean Kane?
What the devil?
It is like
James Bond. Like, who's your James Bond?
And it's like, you know, nobody's gonna be
my Superman except for Christopher Reeve.
That's right. My Superman.
That's right. You know?
Okay.
You're right.
I'm right about
my opinion. Yes.
I wanted to validate it Also boyhood
I just keep going
Where was Christopher Reeve in that?
And I thought he'd show up
I really did
Year three or four
I thought he'd be there
Surprise I'm your dad
Yeah
Yeah I didn't like Man of Steel
In summary I did not like Man of Steel. In summary,
I did not like it.
I saw, last movie I saw,
thank you for asking,
Get Hard.
Oh!
Yeah.
Did you like it?
I laughed.
Yeah, you know, what are you going to do?
There's a lot of prison rape jokes,
you know,
so if that's not your cup of
rape...
This is the worst cup
of noodles I've ever had.
Oh, no, no, that's cup of rape.
No, that's not cup of noodles.
Rape is never good.
No. It's always bad.
Even when it's fresh.
No, it's always bad.
Even when it's fresh.
Just trying to, you know,
take back rape, you guys.
From the women?
No, from...
I wanted you to stop.
That's all I'm trying to say.
Quit it, you guys.
But for some reason, prison rape is a riot.
But overall, out of five stars, you give it.
Oh, don't make me do that.
Do it.
Okay, you go first with Man of Steel.
Okay, I will.
Okay.
Fine, here we go.
Good luck working with Kevin Costner.
First time, I was like, no fucking stars.
Like, none.
The second time, I was like, no fucking stars. Like, none. The second time I was like, 3.2.
Oh!
You really divide up your stars.
Wow.
Usually you go half a star, but never really
20% of a star.
A lot of these old school critics
go half a star.
I play the whole decimal.
Is that what I said right?
And this is out of five stars? Out of five stars, three. a star. I play the whole decimal. Is that right? Is that what I said right?
This is out of five stars?
Out of five stars, three. Solid three. That means you liked it mostly.
I think I did. It's over the hump.
It's better than not liking it.
Now your turn.
Ah.
Ah.
Ah.
2.8
that smelled good didn't it
a little bit over
I love Will Ferrell and I enjoy
Kevin Hart has a scene
in the movie where he
impersonates a bunch of different guys in one
prison yard to simulate for Will Ferrell
what it's going to be like in prison
and it's the funniest scene I think that he's ever done in anything.
Kevin Hart.
Yeah.
But the rest of it, it's just, you know, it's intermittently hilarious,
but it's like, you know, what I said earlier.
It's a prison rape movie.
Finally.
That should be the quote in the ad.
A prison rape comedy.
We had an abortion comedy with Obvious Child.
Now here's the prison rape comedy.
What's next, guys?
For what?
For the comedies?
Oh, for the rapes?
Oh, for the rapes?
I don't know.
No, I meant, what's next?
The part where I say,
finally?
I'm so lost now.
Let the gamers begin!
Oh.
Oh, thank God.
I wanted to be
extra confused.
Everyone extra confused today.
It makes for a fun game.
You know, it's kind of like when they spin you around before, you know, you try to pin the tail on the donkey.
That's what that just was.
That's my excuse.
The first game we're going to play...
Oh, we've got to get name tags.
Sorry, sorry.
People brought some lovely name tags.
So, lady and gentleman,
choose who you'd like to play for.
Rory grabbed a stool to make a table for his water.
And while they go out and pick who they want to play for...
Name tags!
We'll do this commercial recorded by me, excited about a new thing one of our sponsors is doing.
So we'll be right back.
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And we're back.
Rory is so great when you can't hear.
That was when I was raped.
That's how old I was, and that's what happened.
We'll be back after this rape.
All right, just lost a sponsor.
It was nice having you guys.
I don't think this is a name tag.
I pretty much just took somebody's...
Somebody just has an item.
Did they just give you those?
What is it called?
I wanted that.
Is there a shithead on the bottom?
Nope.
You don't have one?
Not yet.
Not yet. Oh, crafty. Ooh, I like that. Someone who thinks they can? Not yet. Not yet.
Oh, crafty.
Ooh, I like that.
Someone who thinks they can get one in at the end.
I bet you it's going to be rape.
That's the biggest shithead.
Ultimate shithead.
Yeah.
Okay, go ahead.
What is it?
It's lard-lad donuts, world famous.
It looks like there's bacon on it.
Are you going to eat it?
I would like to help. That's a donut? Are you you going to eat it? I would like to help. That's a donut?
Are you guys going to eat it?
It looks like a giant cookie.
I saw the look in your eyes.
If you're going to eat it, then you should keep it and play for that
guy, but if you're not going to eat it, you should give it back to him
and get a real name tag.
I don't think I'm going to eat it.
But Rory wants to. Well, now I feel
like a pig.
Do you want to trade name tags, Rory, for that? Do you want to trade it for
the food? Whose name is this
donut? I can't tell. It's not even a name.
Alex. What is it?
Alex brought that. I didn't want to call you
Lard Lad. That's rude.
I'm sorry. Did you mean to give
this away or did he just take this from you?
Did he wrestle it out of your hands?
I shanked him.
Also, didn't you grab it from this side of the room?
I passed it.
Oh, you passed it down.
Everyone in that row touched this thing?
Yep.
How long ago did you buy the donut?
Do not lie.
Donut lie.
Donut lie to us.
Do you want to hide in the alley later and destroy this thing with our mouth?
Play for it
I think that's it
I will play for it
Alright
Oh, that'll be fun
Let's go throw it around in the parking lot
Yeah
I'd eat some of the bacon off of it, but I can't eat the rest of it
It's the size of a coffee cake
Yeah, look at that
I kind of want to actually go buy one of those in the morning
With a tiny shot of espresso and just stand on a sidewalk like,
My ratios are off! Help! I'm in Bizarro Breakfast World!
And those are some of the dreams that I have.
Alright, who are you playing for, Rory? All right.
Who are you playing for, Rory?
Well, I am playing for Christina Tuna Harrell.
And it's Christina the Damned.
She's got a framed picture here.
Signed by me.
Signed by Doug.
So this isn't the first time she's been able to make contact.
All she wants is hell on earth.
So...
Oh, Graham Elwood signed the shoulder.
Oh, okay.
So there's only so much I can say.
I feel like I'm on a...
Yeah, I don't know why you feel like you have to keep going.
I feel like I'm appraising this item. Don't talk why you feel like you have to keep going. I feel like I'm appraising this item.
Rory, don't talk about that until I tell you to stop.
It's a nice frame.
Ten minutes later.
I think she's done well here.
You can put it on the mantle.
There's glasses in place.
I wouldn't add it.
I don't know why it isn't already, but...
Disgusting.
Who are you playing for, Megan?
So I'm playing for Oh Rod, and it is
it's George Burns.
I thought it was E.T. because I don't
have good eyesight, but it's a picture
of George Burns
with his finger up.
So it's from the
Oh Rod is a pun off Oh God, the original
George Burns.
I love the
catchphrase that was on the
poster or whatever. If you don't mind me
reading it, I do a pretty good George Burns.
It's a line that he
says in the movie and it goes
like this.
Anybody
who could turn Lot's wife
into a pillar of salt
incinerate Sodom
and Gomorrah,
and make it rain for 40 days and 40 nights?
There's gotta be a fun guy!
George Burns, ladies and gentlemen. Rest in peace.
George Burns.
You sounded like one of the characters
from the animated Robin Hood movie.
I don't know which one it was, though.
Friar Tuck!
Yeah, that's it.
You honestly sound like me yelling at a boyfriend.
It's Archie's wife.
Sounds awesome.
All in the family.
Yeah, it was Archie's wife.
Oh, Archie.
Slower.
Remember that episode where the guy tried to rape her?
I knew that was going to come back.
It always comes back to that, doesn't it?
It always comes back to it.
That was the hottest episode.
This episode is being haunted by rape.
Sheesh.
This first game we're going to play
is called...
You can put your pastry down if you'd like.
Just try not to remember to stomp on it when you jump up in victory.
We're going to play Cluster Flicks.
Do you know this one, Rory?
I don't think I do.
A lady yelled out Amy Adams one time in Sacramento.
It made me very upset.
Well, was I there? Or are you just saying that in general?
Hmm? Nothing?
It's a random thought.
Nothing at all.
Let's try listening to each other.
So,
I don't know who missed what there.
I don't know who missed what there.
Something in the audience yelled out, and nobody
in the audience is allowed to yell out the answer,
because you three guys,
two guys and one lady, you have to
I'm going to pick somebody,
actor or actress,
I'm going to start reading off their credits. I'm going to give you
three movies
that this person's been in, and then
you all get to guess.
And then after that, if nobody gets it right,
then I'm just going to add titles until somebody blurts out the right answer.
Armpit Stane Johnson.
I have a question.
You were not kidding around about being sweaty.
Don't do that for too long,
or you're going to make yourself pass out.
Is it whoever can answer first
or do you say the credits and then we go
in order of trying to guess?
I'll say three with nobody saying anything.
Once three are out there, then anybody can guess.
We can blurt it.
Is this side just as bad?
We don't blurt it, right?
We blurt it after three.
After three, but not until
after the first three.
It's uneven.
The idea is I try to pick movies from this person's career
that I'll get through as many as possible
before anybody knows what it is.
Cool.
I like to challenge myself.
I think they got it in four titles the last time we played,
so I screwed up on that one.
You ready?
Yeah.
Who was in The Proposal, The Company Man, and Soul Surfer?
Company Men, I apologize.
And Soul Surfer. The Propos I apologize. And Soul Surfer.
The Proposal.
The Company Men.
I'm just going to say the Proposal.
Does anybody have an answer?
Ryan Gosling.
A guess?
Good guess?
Not in any of those.
Company Men.
All right.
You ready for more?
Now just jump in if you think you have it.
Aaron Eckhart.
Oh, that's a great guess, but he was in the company of men.
Oh.
Are we out or do we get to keep guessing as we go forward?
And he wasn't in Soul Surfer, he was in Aaron Brockovich.
It's easy to confuse real life stories where one person's fighting a corrupt system
and the other one's being eaten by a shark.
Continuing on.
I'll give you the first three again.
The proposal, the company men, and soul surf.
Do we keep blurting or am I out?
You can blurt from now on. As much as you want.
Paul Blurt, mall curb.
No.
Correct.
Sandra Bullock.
No, she was
in the proposal. Good job. Good job, Rory.
The Skulls.
Jeez.
The Devil's Advocate.
Ghosts of Mississippi.
Who?
Wow.
Fuck.
Oh, Matthew McConaughey?
No.
No.
Morgan Freeman.
Turner and...
Wait a second.
Morgan Freeman?
Hooch.
Turner and Hooch. the dog from that movie
Troop Beverly
Hills
I don't even know what's happening
this is a
cluster flick
Jackson
Jackson
Jackson
the Killing Fields oh my god Action Jackson. The same movie? Action Jackson.
The Killing Fields.
Oh my God.
The Killing Fields.
Sam Waterston.
No, Silkwood.
What?
The Osterman Weekend.
That's not a movie.
Not even real.
All the Right Moves.
Oh. Oh.
Where the buffalo roam.
Stir crazy.
Private Benjamin.
Or as I like to call it, Private Ben-Hameen.
Peter.
The formula. And justice for all.
Okay, the time might turn finally.
Get ready, you guys.
The Incredibles.
Craig T. Nelson.
That's correct.
See, I knew I couldn't get these by anybody.
I knew the Incredibles would tip it.
Poltergeist would fucking tip it.
And then I also wrote on there,
the TV show Coach.
Tuna!
And Parenthood. He was on Parenthood.
That was good.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I thought I knew it the whole time,
but I was like, wait till that last one.
But there was a few more.
But yeah, Incredibles was a really good clue
because it narrows it down to...
You knew it wasn't Holly Hunter.
You knew it wasn't Brad Bird as Edna.
All right.
It's time for ABCD's notes, y'all.
Five or six people like that.
More people are getting excited
it's really catching on
Craig T. Nelson is also in
another film I left off that list
that I enjoy a great deal
I'd say it's probably my favorite
Will Ferrell movie
and it's a motion picture called
Blades of Glory
you know what I like about Blades of Glory?
Comparing it unfairly to Get Hard.
Get Hard, like none of the supporting characters, Craig T. Nelson's in it.
Greg Gurman's in it.
What's-her-name Alison Brie's in it.
And they're really good, funny actors.
And they don't get anything really funny to do.
It's just kind of the Kevin and Will show for the most part.
Ron Funches is fun, though.
As JoJo,
the motherfucker that'll kill a motherfucker.
He's like a badass
and it's hilarious because he never goes,
hee! He never lets out
the real Funches laugh
for fear of getting fired.
But he did a great job.
But, yeah, I love
Blades of Glory because I just think every character in the movie
is funny and it's a really fun movie to me.
Of all of his sports movies, I have to like the fucking ice skating one the best.
What a pansy.
Here we go.
Rory gets to go first on this one.
And then we'll go to Megan and Aaron and so on.
And all you got to do is match with me
the movie that I wrote down
ahead of time. I don't know why I touched my brain, but
match my brain.
I wrote down a movie. We're gonna spell out
Blades of Glory, and we're starting with you,
Rory,
with the letter B.
Any movie that begins
with the letter B, but if you say the same one that I
came up with, you win automatically.
Big.
If you can't think of one, you're out.
Big.
Big is your answer?
Big.
One chance to change it.
So arbitrary.
Blade Runner.
Oh, so close.
Might be the closest someone's been
without actually getting it right.
Well, that's the story of my life.
Because I went with Blades of Glory.
No, I'm kidding.
I went with, because Megan is in it,
a motion picture called Bachelorette.
Oh, yeah.
I just got really creepy.
All right, Megan.
The letter L.
I'm wanting to think that you wrote this down.
That's the...
Trying to think of what I wrote down,
but basically you just have to name a movie that begins with L.
Lolita.
Just to save your skin.
Lolita.
That's something I would write down.
That's a good movie.
The first time.
Not the Jeremy Irons time.
It was like a lion was stalking her
for the entire movie.
I went with,
because I thought this would be funny for Elle,
Last Man Standing.
I'm talking about it like crazy.
All right.
Hey, Erin.
Oh, you can do TV too.
No. She's thinking can do TV, too. No.
She's thinking of the Tim Allen show.
That reason we all stay home on Friday nights.
Last man standing on Earth.
Hey, Aaron.
You wrote down Air Bud 2 Golden Receiver.
Thank you.
No, I didn't. I wrote down Air Bud 2 Golden Receiver. Thank you. No, I didn't.
I wrote down Action Jackson.
Oh.
Action Jackson.
If that would have won it, I would have celebrated with you.
With that donut cake.
Yep, good night.
Hello.
D, Rory.
Days of Thunder.
Oh, another close one.
I went with Date Night.
Well, date. You had the first sound in there. Tom Cruise with Date Night. Well, date.
You had the first sound in there.
Tom Cruise is in both.
I did that because it takes place
in Manhattan where I'm going to be at the Gramercy
Theater on April
27th and 28th. 27th is
sold out. Suckers.
E.
Megan.
Stop. Is there a movie called Echo?
That's really how you want to play this And you know what
There's a movie called Earth to Echo
And it's about a creature from outer space
What do they call those things?
No
There's another word for a thing that comes down from outer space.
Maybe befriends a little boy.
Eats some Reese's Pieces.
Oh, an E.T.
E.T. would be an E movie.
Is there a movie called Echo?
E.T.
The extraterrestrial and his adventures on Earth.
Okay, Megan's out.
Wait, but is there a movie called Echo?
There might be, but you can't phrase it as a question.
I'm a real stickler for knowledge.
I went with Easter Parade, because of course we'll be back here doing other Douglas movies next Sunday, Easter Sunday.
So bring eggs. Easter Parade, because of course we'll be back here doing other Douglas movies next Sunday, Easter Sunday, so bring your
eggs.
I don't know, I said it better earlier.
S.
Aaron.
Stir Crazy.
Nicely done. I might have
picked that because it happened earlier.
Now I'm seeing what's going on here.
But I was just thinking about self-promotion on this one,
and I just wrote super high mean.
It's still available on Netflix if you haven't. I'm seeing what's going on here. But I was just thinking about self-promotion on this one, and I just wrote super high, man. I was going to say that.
It's still available on Netflix, if you haven't.
Rory, oh.
Othello.
Oh.
Lots of versions of that movie.
Which one were you thinking of?
Lawrence Fishburne.
Okay.
I went with Operation Dumbo Drop.
No particular reason.
F, Megan.
I'm still in?
Sorry, I didn't mean...
I was cleaning it up there for a second.
I said, fuck Megan.
Aaron. I got it real. I was like... up there for a second. I said, fuck Megan, Aaron.
I got it real.
I was like, F Megan.
F Aaron.
You'll be back for the next game.
You tell me yours and I'll use yours.
I probably will hurt you.
Fire starter.
Okay.
Seem kind of angry about it.
I saw that movie.
Pretty big laugh when Heather Locklear's oven mitts catch on fire.
Just watch that one scene if you haven't. Yeah, because she's such a good actress.
She got better, I guess.
She got better, I guess.
Anyway, I went with Footloose because I'm going to be interrupting that
in Nashville on April 15th
at the Belcourt Theater.
Have you ever been to the Belcourt Theater, Rory?
I have been there.
It's nice, right?
It's great.
Yeah, yeah.
You're also doing stuff for the
Nashville Wild West Comedy Fest.
Wild West Comedy Fest, that's right.
So we'll see you there.
Yep.
That takes me into my next letter. G. G. Gone West Comedy Fest. That's right. So we'll see you there. Yep. That takes me into my next letter.
G.
Gone with the Wind. I'll be on
the road most of April. You can
check out my dates
at RoryScoville.com.
I'm going to be in a couple different spots soon.
Take a look if you get me. I thought you were leading
in to say something about Atlanta when you said
you're Gone with the Wind. I'll be in Atlanta
for the Sweetwater 420 Festival.
For 17
to 19. So it's right
before the 420.
I put Ghosts of
Mississippi.
Because it's a Craig T. Nelson movie.
L.
Aaron. Lord of. L. Aaron.
Lord of the Rings.
Okay.
Guess there was one just called that.
Didn't they have subtitles from the get?
Yeah, what's the full title?
What?
Lord of the Rings, colon.
Oh.
You know, Dance of the Pixies
or whatever it was
Lord of the Rings
Return of the King
no
Return of the King
is just the
yeah
don't fuck yourself over
with this shit
Lord of the Rings
Return of the King
of course
first instinct this shit
Rory
is it the
Lord of the Rings
I don't want to go
to the judges' table.
Oh.
Judges have bad breath.
That's why you don't want to go to the table.
It's, uh...
What was the question?
No, I don't know what it was.
It's not The Lord of the Rings. It's Lord of the Rings.
It should be. It's a better title.
Okay. O again.
Always an easy one for me. Your L.
Your L. Oh.
Did I just do L?
Oh, you did? Yeah.
I didn't say what my L was. That's what went wrong.
Mine was leaves of grass.
I'm doing a 420 show
on 420.
At the Comedy Works of Denver.
The other two shows are sold out,
but the one on 420,
that's a tough sell
because people have jobs and shit.
Oh, Rory.
Oh, fuck you.
You can do it.
Oh.
It's easier than you'd think.
Well, I want to say omen,
but I think it's the omen.
It sure is.
Okay, so that should buy me about five or six.
But how about something that begins with O?
Okay.
All the movies out there.
Overboard, starring Kurt Russell!
And Goldie Ha!
I was trying to coax you into saying O,
because there's a movie called O.
O, yeah. Yeah, but I went with Old Dracula, coax you into saying, oh, because there's a movie called Oh.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, but I went with Old Dracula because I just thought it was funny
that that exists. I want to
see it now, a movie called Old Dracula
where David Niven apparently played
Old Dracula. Just in an old
Vogue song? I don't think he's that old.
Dracula! He's just older.
Old for Dracula.
He must have been bit
When he was already old
Right
Oh he had to have been
Wait even though
I'm disqualified
Am I still about to talk
Uh huh
Oh okay okay
What's on your mind
Just it's
It's just like
I don't know
It's just rude to call
Dracula old
Like he's always been old
He doesn't age
Right but he's
Played by an old man It's just like Right, but he's played by an old man.
It's just like in Blackula, he's played by a black guy.
It's like if you're not a Dracula,
it's just like a young Robert Pattinson type
or a Frank Langella,
then you've got to be labeled.
It's sad.
It's sad what's happening with Draculas.
So many Dracula adjectives now.
Drag you love, that's another one.
You've got to be in drag.
Is that a real one?
I think so.
I'd watch it.
I'd watch it.
I'd watch Dabula.
Alright, where are we?
What's happening?
What letter are we on?
I said my O,
and so we're on R.
Aaron? Rushmore.
Oh, that's a great one.
Love that movie. I went with
Roar
because it's playing at Cinefamily
and I really want to interrupt it
and I want Roary to be there
because that's just fun.
When is it? Do you know this movie Roar?
Uh-uh. It's where Melanie Griffith and her mom,
Tippi Hedren, and her husband
thought it would be a good idea to shoot a motion picture.
It took them 11 years to make it.
They financed it themselves.
Just hanging out with all of their lions and tigers
and shooting a story, a movie with a story,
but with all these fucking wild animals
just doing whatever the fuck they want
over all of them for the entire motion picture.
Everyone involved in the production got injured at some point,
and there's scenes in the movies
where you're just watching a fucking lion
tear into a guy's arm, and he's just like,
it's cool, it's cool, it's all right,
lion, these are our friends.
And they had 11 years to rethink that decision
and nobody did. It's so
crazy and it's so suspenseful because
they're trying to just tell kind of
there's points in the movie where they're actually supposed to be
scared of the lions and tigers. Those parts
play extra scary because you know
that they're scared and that it really is
scary that these animals are all
fucking coming after them because they're
being playful a lot of the time,
but it looks fucking vicious.
You know what I mean?
They tackle people a lot.
It's like, oh my God.
And they keep filming.
John DeBond was the cinematographer
and got his fucking top of his head torn off
by a wild animal.
What in the sense?
You know, it's amazing there hasn't been more press
about this movie.
And then Tippi Hedren
kind of changed
her whole outlook.
She was always
a preservationist
or whatever,
but she has gotten
even deeper into
protection of animals
and stuff because
she was involved
in that horrible,
horrible thing.
When did it come out?
She put her own child
at risk every day
to make this movie
about the lions.
It was 1981 was when it was released.
Leonard Maltin gave it one and a half stars.
He says they thought they could make an entertaining movie
by using real animals,
and he went, no cigar.
Leonard did not buy it,
but I think it's hilarious and terrifying,
and I hope to interrupt it soon.
Let's wrap this game up.
The letter Y.
You're next.
Oh, that's a horror movie.
A horror flick.
Is that in your top 25, Aaron?
No.
You're next.
It's not?
No.
Okay, because it follows being compared a lot to You're Next
as being like kind of taking the genre and subverting it a little bit.
No.
What about...
No, no, dude.
Is your top 25 of horror just movies that are strictly horror,
or are there horror comedies?
Oh, yeah, horror comedies.
Shaun of the Dead's in there.
Of course it is.
Yeah, of course it is.
American Werewolf in London.
Comedy? It's funny. Yeah, of course it is. American Werewolf in London? Comedy?
It's funny.
Yeah, there is funny parts.
American Werewolf in London isn't funny or scary.
I mean Paris, sorry.
No, no, no, no, no.
That's not in there.
That's not anywhere.
Nope.
That's not on the egg list.
Nope.
Paris kicked it out.
I went with Yanks.
Yanks?
Yeah, because there's a movie called
Yanks.
Great.
Richard Gere stars, he's starring in
Yanks. And it was like
a few years later he was starring in Bent.
Richard Gere
is just throwing out those gay
kind of clues all the time.
So many people bought those movies and were pissed.
Although Ben's, I think, was pretty sexy.
I don't know. I don't think I ever saw it.
Who knows? Let's play the Leonard Malt
game, you guys.
Rory maintains control.
Congratulations to everybody
for getting through.
Well, not two of you for getting through.
It's just a survival game.
But Rory, I guess, technically won it, didn't he?
We gave him another chance on that Lord of the Rings thing,
and he pulled it out.
He yanked it.
It was bent, and he yanked it.
So we'll still start with you Rory
In the Leonard Maltin game
Good
Why is the clock that's supposed to be pointed
At the stage to see what time it is
Why is it all askew so it's like
There it is
Thanks
I'm looking at my phone right now anyway
I don't know why I need that one
But it still was bothering me
that I didn't know what time it was.
But we're right on schedule, you guys.
Yeah.
Is it getting too hot in here for people?
So take off all your clothes.
I am getting so hot,
I'm going to take my...
I got you.
Made you say it. Take it off.
Alright.
If you get suckered into
singing, you have to undress.
Shit, I just had to catch you, sir.
Roy gets to pick the first category.
Playing to two points
We'll continue on in the same order
We were going before
You know what, Aaron lasted longer
So let's let Aaron go second
And you'll go third
I'm totally fine with that
It's only the fair thing to do
Feels good to do the right thing
Rory, would you like
As suggested by good old Sagan Baggins,
Apollo 86, and that's films where Carl Weathers dies.
I'll give you a quick little clue.
It's not Action Jackson.
Interstellar got her groove back.
Of course, is Matthew McConaughey, romantic movies. Rom Matthew McConaughey, Romantic Movies.
Romantic McConaughey.
And then, this is also a weird coincidence, this one came up.
This category is called Superman.
Superman.
And it's movies with soup or man in the title.
Which one of those would you like to play, Rory Scovel?
Number one, please.
Carl Weathers-related material.
Carl Weathers dies?
85 or 87?
What's your poison?
That's how it always is for me.
85.
There we go.
Two and a half stars from Leonard.
He calls this movie totally artificial.
He also says
that
there's just a part that's great.
But again, two and a half stars. So it's totally artificial.
There's a part that's great.
Are we whispering because this is where the listener
really starts to fall asleep?
We don't want to wait.
1985. Just think about 1985.
All the good things that were happening in your life.
That's right.
Kindergarten.
And eight names.
Let's go with eight names.
Eight names.
How many can you get in, Rory?
Out of eight
I'm going to say
Seven names
Sliced one off
Get that last one out of here
Aaron
I have to do six?
You don't have to do
Yeah, I do
Okay
I like that
I like that, Aaron
Good for you
Wow Megan He says six Yeah, I do. I like that, Aaron. Good for you.
Megan?
He says six.
I think he should name it.
Okay. That is
fucking trash talk.
I'm a bitch right now, but you need
to name that movie.
Fine.
I will.
Tell me.
In six names.
Here's your six names.
I'll give you the clues again only if you need them.
Because your six names are...
James Brown.
Michael Pataki.
Brigitte Nielsen.
Burt Young.
Talia Shire,
and Carl Weathers.
Who dies?
I'm not asking, I'm telling.
What do you got, Aaron?
Seems a very painful decision.
For some, it's quite obvious.
What are you going to go with?
Wait, what?
Wait.
Huh?
Wait.
This is...
You think this is tough?
This is Action Jackson.
I want to say, as someone who's horrible at this podcast,
I know this one and it's killing me that you don't.
No, I'm brain dead right now.
And it's funny that you're even guessing Action Jackson
because the first thing I said is it's not Action Jackson.
I'm so brain dead right now.
You're a liar.
It is Action Jackson.
I thought I could trick it. You're a liar. It is action, Jackson. I thought I could trick you.
You're correct.
I'm seriously frozen.
I can see the...
It's not frozen.
It is not frozen.
I can see the goddamn movie poster.
I'm dumbfounded.
I'm like, it's...
You're stumped.
It's right.
You're stumped.
It's not coming out.
Can I guess for him and take half the point?
I can say it.
No half point, but there is a personal pride
that you'll walk away from for knowing
the answer that everybody knows.
Can we have the whole audience say it with you?
Aaron, are you done?
Aaron, you're not going to get it.
He guessed something, I thought. He guessed Action Jackson.
Oh, you already guessed?
Megan, do you know it? Because you're getting the point.
Maybe you should say it. No, I'm embarrassed
because I was waiting for you to say
Sylvester Stallone.
So then, there it is.
And three,
two, one. Rocky
Four. Oh, it is Rocky IV.
Rocky IV, yeah.
Where's Sylvester Stallone?
Top built.
You're going to get this game someday.
What if I would have been that confident
and then I got it wrong?
Rocky XVII.
I heard a Rocky III in the crowd.
I did hear that.
Oh, so then I did.
Dolph Lundgren and Sylvester Stallone were the top two.
Rocky VII goes to Germany.
Can I leave now?
I'm just so glad to get rid of one of the Apollo 86 answers
because nobody ever selects that category.
Megan gets a point, everybody.
Do you know how mad I am right now?
Do you know this is how I win this game?
Other people's incompetence.
I'm usually good at that, too.
Who was James Brown in Action Jackson?
As himself.
Was he in Action Jackson?
Rocky IV, not Action Jackson.
No, that's what I'm saying.
As soon as you said James Brown, I was like, Jesus Christ.
Yeah, that was a huge giveaway, lower name.
But also, just that movie's packed with names that you know from the series.
Brigitte?
Yeah, yeah.
Brigitte's in there.
Can we stop talking about this movie?
Rocky IV.
I'm more.
Like, is it bad that I'm legitimately pissed off
that I could not say it?
It was like,
I don't know why.
I don't know what happened.
My favorite was when you said,
I can see the movie poster.
I was like,
can't you, Aaron?
Because I don't think that's true.
Maybe you need to take a bite of lard, lad,
and chew it out.
Dolph Lundgren.
Let's just change the subject.
Let's just change the subject.
Please change the subject.
I'm so...
One more thing.
One more thing.
I'm embarrassed.
Rocky IV is my second favorite movie
with four in the title.
After Citizen IV.
Because that movie's more important.
I disagree. Rocky
mended things with two countries.
Which now
is harboring a character
from the other movie.
And we wouldn't have that without
Rocky's incredible
speech.
After one epic battle.
I actually kind of like how I tied that all together.
Pretty proud of myself.
Fair enough.
I'm just trying to figure out what's supposed to happen next.
Who challenged who there? I challenged. Megan told Naren to name it what's supposed to happen next. Who challenged who there?
I challenged...
Megan told Naren to name it.
Yeah, there you go.
So we're going to start with you, Rory.
Again.
And then go to Megan.
All right.
And Rory gets to pick between...
This is a fun one.
Serpico and Sepulveda.
Serpico and Sepulveda. Serpico and Sepulveda.
And that's Al Pacino movies that take place in Los Angeles.
Okay.
Gregory Pex on Twitter.
That's a fun one. Gregory Pex,
P-E-C-S, suggested
Box of Chocolates.
And that's any movie ever made.
Box of Chocolates. Box of chocolates.
Oh, yeah.
You just never know what you're going to get.
And then...
One dude is loving that.
He is loving that.
I love it. Pure joy.
Let's see how he feels about this one.
Fifty Shades of Grape.
That's movies where Johnny Depp has sex.
I love it.
That's good.
That's a good one.
That's really good.
Which one else do you like?
I'm going to go with the first one.
Serpico and the rest of it.
Sepulveda.
Sepulveda. Sepulveda.
Sepulveda.
Yeah, some streets here in Los Angeles
where this movie takes place.
Three and a half stars from Leonard.
The year is 1995.
He calls it Dynamite.
Overlength is the only criticism
of this Cracker Jack.
Other words
that are too contemporary.
That's not a bad word to say.
It's crackerjack and contemporary.
And he lists
a lot of names.
Eleven.
Sixteen.
Twenty names.
Twenty names.
Wow.
Rory!
I'm telling you, that's what that movie's like.
It fucking scares the shit out of you.
And the lion is fucking...
I'm gonna take all 20!
You have kind of a lion face, don't you?
He says 20 names, Megan.
19.
No, no, no, 19.
A lot of confidence on this panel today.
Aaron.
18.
I can see the poster, Doug.
So, feeling good I've heard those words before
I'm going to say name it
What?
Yeah, I'm going to say name it
Alright, you crackpot
Oh, everyone's like, why would he say name it?
He didn't get Rocky IV right.
That's right, the boy who cried wolf.
Ah, shit.
Fuck, he knows it.
I take it back, I take it back!
Do you take it back?
No, I don't name it.
Okay.
How many does he get?
17.
17.
The entire... 18. 17. The entire 18.
The entire casting crew.
First bid was 20.
20, 19, 18.
So 18.
Aaron's going to do this in 18.
Craft services, bye.
All but two names are going to be left out.
Per grade.
Doesn't matter.
Probably.
I think people in this audience will know it after three names.
But here we go.
Jeremy Piven.
Toneloak.
Henry Rollins.
Hank Azaria.
Kevin Gage. Tom Noonan. Hank Azaria. Kevin Gage.
Tom Noonan.
Natalie Portman.
William Fichtner.
Dennis Haysbert.
Ted Levine.
He puts the lotion on his skin.
Low clue there.
Sorry to everybody else.
Wes Studi,
Mikkel T. Williamson,
Ashley Judd, Amy Brenneman,
Diane Venora,
Thomas Ismar,
John Voigt,
Val Kilmer,
Al Pacino, three and a half stars,
1995. The answer is
Heat. Correct. Correct. Yeah. Al Pacino, three and a half stars, 1995. The answer is... Heat?
Correct.
Yeah.
So not Batman Forever.
Okay.
Okay.
That makes sense.
And Bud Cort appears unbilled, according to the landing. Thanks, buddy.
I wouldn't have forgotten that.
You're a true friend.
I thought it was Heat, but I didn't know if I could name it.
You're a true friend.
I'm so excited, too.
I'm going to eliminate I could name it. I'm so excited, too.
I'm going to eliminate that category right now.
Because I don't think Al Pacino's ever done anything else that takes place in L.A.
I don't think.
Was it Dog Day afternoon? Dog Day afternoon?
Was that L.A.?
That wasn't L.A.
What was that?
New York.
Wasn't it a hot New York day?
No, I don't think that was it.
Maybe Baltimore.
Was it?
Was it?
Any given Sunday?
Was that an L.A. Sunday?
Does anybody know where Doug gave you that?
No, any given Sunday.
It was Miami.
Attica.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Attica.
Attica.
I thought he chanted that because he was in the prison.
Scent of a Woman is New York.
Scent of a Woman is New York.
Scent of a Woman.
Devil's Advocate is New York.
Wait, we're not going to do this for a while, are we?
Devil's Advocate, that was New York.
He had a movie in Miami.
That would be a version of Last Man Standing.
You have to name the movie and where it took place.
If you don't get both, you're out.
That would be tough.
And we'd have to have somebody looking stuff up.
That's too much trouble.
What just happened?
Aaron got a point.
We got a two-way tie between Aaron and Megan.
Get me in this game.
You're the best.
Rory wants in bad.
If Rory manages to get a point here, if he snags one,
then he's going to be in for a round of asparagus pee to break the tie.
So good luck, Rory.
I have to drink
asparagus?
I'll just stay out of it.
So Rory told Aaron to name it,
so we're going to start with Megan and then go to
Rory.
And Megan gets to choose between
Nationwide
is on your side!
And that's a movie where a kid dies.
First name basis, that's where it's a very famous
movie that I will choose, but
I will only read the first names of the
cast after the bidding is finished.
Wait, say that again, I'm sorry.
First names only.
Don't pick that.
Don't pick that.
If you act like that, maybe she will.
Or Dear White People,
which is movies featuring
Betty White, Jack White, or Mike White.
I'm going to go with the first one.
Okay, so you don't like white.
It seems more fun.
Yeah, 10 kids is a blast.
Kid dies in a movie in 89 and in a movie in 2001.
Which one of those would you like to try?
Okay.
Let's try 89.
Okay.
Bomb, according to Leonard.
You picked a bomb.
He says about this movie
that it was followed by a sequel.
He also says
he calls it a box office hit.
Let me try this whole sentence.
Maybe I can say this whole sentence.
He calls it a box office hit whose contempt for its audience
was sensed even by undiscriminating moviegoers.
That's not a great clue.
And again, he said it was a bomb
from 1989, and he lists
seven names.
How many names can you get in, Megan?
Box office hit, but a bomb.
Bomb.
His critical word for the film
is bomb, but it was
a box office hit.
I mean, seven. It takes all the names. Was it But it was a box office hit. I mean, seven.
It takes all the names.
Was it before bomb was the bomb?
Like, this Danish is the bomb.
I don't know where we were on that.
Around 1989?
It even sounds like this particular review
was written for the guide
and not when the movie came out
but when it showed up in the guide
because he's calling it a box office hit
and usually critics don't
if they review it right when it comes out
they don't know that yet
just check him
where are we going now Rory
yeah Rory
I'm a
fucking I'm a
wait you want her to have all seven names yes okay Yeah, Rory. Naima. Fucking Naima.
Wait, you want her to have all seven names?
Yes.
Okay.
Why does everyone question me?
I question you because I hope you'll change your mind because it's probably a good strategy what you're doing right now.
I think you might bring this into a three-way tie.
But let's give Megan a chance.
You don't know what I'm...
Kids don't die in a lot of movies.
Wait, what?
It's true.
Kids don't die in a lot of movies.
Very precious few have children actually dying in them.
Very few movies have the nerve of, like, let's say, a My Girl.
1989 is the year.
So it's not my girl
Did I say that?
1989
And your seven names
Are
And some of these I'm not completely familiar with
So I apologize if I get the pronunciation incorrect
This is a good sign
Miko Hughes is in this movie?
Mm-hmm. I think it's Miko.
Blaze
Birdall?
Yep.
Michael Lombard, I'm nailing that one.
Brad Greenquist,
that can only be the way you pronounce that.
Denise Crosby,
Fred Gwynn,
and Dale Midkiff.
But there was a sequel.
Do you ever wear like a blouse that's like a Midkiff?
Any idea what that movie is?
I have absolutely no idea.
Do you have a guess of a movie where a child dies?
Well, yeah, but it's not that movie is? I have absolutely no idea. Do you have a guess of a movie where a child dies? Well, yeah, but it's not that movie.
Well, but it's still fun to take a crazy wild guess.
Well, the one with the parents and then the guy, but it's not that because that was earlier than 1981.
Then his brother dies, and I know my girl, she dies, he dies.
And there's like, but it could maybe, it's a horror it's a horror movie. Producer Matt is throwing
signals from the booth.
Do you have something? No, I don't know. Oh, I have
nothing. I was excited because I thought of it.
Oh, you know the answer. Okay, he's excited
he has the answer.
And do you want to come out
and say the answer into a microphone because
Megan gives up? Maybe it's a
horror movie. It is a horror movie.
Maybe it's a horror movie. Okay is a horror movie. Maybe, yeah. Maybe it's a horror movie.
It is a horror movie.
Okay, so it's probably a horror...
Whoa, she's talking her way through it here.
Maybe it's a horror movie in a child's eyes.
She might get there.
And then there is a sequel.
Is it Damien?
Wait, I mean the...
You just said a movie that has never been.
Wait, what's...
I don't think there's ever been a movie just called Damien.
But that's a good guess that it might be part of that series.
Can I throw another clue in?
I think this is a good clue.
Okay.
No, we're just playing a live game.
Give it all to her!
There's a misspelling in the title.
Yeah.
Does that help anybody?
No.
That is a good clue though.
Tell them the answer
Matt Belknap.
Big hit at the box office.
Bomb according to Leonard.
Mind girl.
Pet
Pet Cemetery.
Pet Cemetery.
Thanks Matt.
Get back in the booth.
That's a first.
He's never like
tried to get my attention and let me know he knows the answer.
Matt has the perfect voice to be on a microphone.
He's like, that is Bat Cemetery.
Matt can do this.
Back to sports.
We should try that sometime where Matt
just comes in with the correct answer.
I like that. Matt, how about you?
We'd have to really coordinate that, though.
No, it's good for making you feel even dumber than you are to do when you don't know.
Someone comes in and talks down to you?
It was Pet Sematary.
Yeah, you should come in and act like you're put off by having to give the answer.
All right, you guys, we've got a three-way tie.
Yeah. All right, you guys. We've got a three-way tie.
Yeah.
Close as I'll ever get to a three-way.
Here we go.
Asparagus pee is the category.
And how that works is I'm going to read the whole review
and it'll give away exactly what movie it is, theoretically.
And you guys will bid probably starting with negative names.
And that's if you say negative one, you have to name the movie and the top billed person in it.
Negative two, negative three, et cetera.
We'll see how deep it goes.
This movie that everybody knows.
And what's the order
going to be here? Rory just got
a point by challenging
Megan.
So Aaron's going to start us off
and then we're going to go to Rory.
I don't know why a timer would be on during my part.
Start the timer?
No, not during my... Start the timer too early?
There's no jumping in with an
answer. You get a second to think about it.
We'll need
a timer.
And the clock is set.
Nope, we don't need a timer. And the clock is set. We don't need a...
Two stars for this movie.
From 1986.
Production of the United States of America.
105 minutes long.
Silent film western.
Heroes are summoned by Mexico
for what they think will be a public appearance.
Find out they're really supposed to rid a village of its bandit chieftain.
Smarmy one-joke comedy has its moments, but not too many.
Buffs may be amused to know that the villain was one of the key bad guys in the Wild Bunch.
Co-scripter Randy Newman wrote the songs. the villain was one of the key bad guys in the Wild Bunch.
Co-scripter Randy Newman wrote the songs.
And then he lists nine names.
How many names can you get it in, Rory?
I thought Aaron was first. I just was curious how many you could get it in.
But Rory has to go first.
I apologize.
Aaron.
So.
Aaron.
So if you go negative one,
you've got to name the movie
and the top billed person in it.
Negative two.
They've got to be in the correct order, of course.
Yeah, I mean, I'll just try.
Everybody's excited to jump in.
I'll just, I'll, um.
What's he going to do? of course. Yeah, I mean, I'll just try. Everybody's excited to jump in. Oh, um...
What's he gonna do?
And I got the order. Try...
I'll just...
You know, because of the Rocky thing...
I don't want to be embarrassed again, so, uh... You know, because of the Rocky thing.
I don't want to be embarrassed again.
Okay.
Just do it.
I'm just going to do negative one.
He's just going negative one. That's it. Shut up.
That's all he's going, Rory, is negative one.
Were you here for the Rocky thing? Okay.
How deep do you think you can go, Rory?
Negative three.
Oh, boy.
This has got to be in the right order, though.
Tough move.
Thought you were going to say two.
But you said three.
Three.
Then he's got to name it because I don't know the fourth.
And he's got to name it in order.
Yeah.
So the name of the film, then the top three billed performers, starting with top billed, second billed, third billed.
So starting with the top billed.
I won't say if you're right or wrong.
So the first name I need to say is the top billed person.
Then next. Then third. Okay.'t say if you're right or wrong. So the first name I need to say is the top build person. Then next.
Then third.
Okay.
But first, the title of the movie.
I won't tell you if you're right or wrong until I've heard all of it.
Okay, and can I ask one question?
Can I just ask the year of the movie?
Was that something you already said?
I said it, yeah.
Yeah, what was it?
No, I said it.
So...
No, no, no.
My question was only, did you say it?
I don't need to know it.
I did.
86.
86.
Okay.
Three amigos.
Starting with the top bill.
Uh-huh.
Chevy Chase.
Steve Martin.
Martin Short.
Megan is our winner.
Fuck!
Steve Martin's number one.
Steve Martin, Chevy Chase, Martin Short.
Can I say something to defend myself?
So nobody would pull this.
Patrice Martinez
is fourth billed in Three Amigos.
Can I tell you what worried me the most?
I couldn't remember if it was the Three Amigos
or Three Amigos.
But then I was also like,
well, Chevy Chase was coming off that SNL fame.
He was a hot, hot ticket.
Fletch, Fletch, Fletch.
Fletch lives. Fletch 2-2. He had the hot, hot ticket. Fletch, Fletch, Fletch. Fletch lives.
Steve Martin, he had the man
with two brains, hot heat
right then. Steve Martin guest hosted
SNL as an
incoming movie star.
SNL made Chevy Chase
one. I mean, they were definitely neck and neck.
They both had big hits. Don't think I didn't
think about it the whole time. At that point, Steve Martin was on more
of a hot streak and I think probably even helped push the movie into being made
because it's a pretty silly premise for an entire feature film.
He'll always be A-list.
Steve Martin, he'll always be A-list.
That is correct.
You know, I say that at all of his banjo recitals.
What a terrible thing to call bluegrass music.
Tuna, I let you down.
Banjo recital. You should be.
Oh, Jesus Christ. Wow, okay.
Well, Megan, who'd you win
for again? You won for God.
Oh, Rod. Oh, Rod, you devil.
Rod.
Are you 21?
Come on down and get your alcohol
and your gambling
tickets. You're really worth setting you on the right road here with this prize package. Come on down and get your alcohol And your gambling tickets
You're really worth setting on the right road
Here with this prize package
Check his ID
Check his ID
Check it
Swipe his ID
It's gray, right?
You got gray hair
Or is it
You dye it gray?
What are you, Steve Martin?
Folks Here's your prize bag I can't tell you. You diet, Gray? What are you, Steve Martin? Folks!
Here's your prize bag.
I don't want to make you bend down
before me, but that's what's happening.
Thank you so much for being here.
You can just leave the schmovies.
Let's hear it for Rod, everybody.
Rod!
Hot Rod!
Hot Rod!
run. Hot Rod.
What do you guys got to plug?
Starting with Rory.
Pass that down if there's a shithead on it.
The dude with the pastry, Alex, needs to share his shithead.
He's probably thought of something genius by this point.
Where's your box of
pastry?
I'm going to give it to you in a second, Alex.
Settle down.
Get your goddamn pastry so you can ride on there like you were supposed to.
Maybe I'm missing it.
I don't think there's one on there.
You didn't put one on here?
Christina?
Do you want to come ride a shithead on this pastry?
Because you can't ride it on here anywhere.
That's probably why you didn't do it, right?
Okay, come on up here,
Christina. I should have done this the whole time.
Well, that's an interesting
mic technique.
It looks like your microphone
wants to kill itself.
Well, uh...
After you do that. Do that first.
As I said before,
go to my website, check my dates.
Gonna be in Raleigh, North Carolina Gonna be in Nashville, Tennessee
Gonna be in Atlanta, Georgia
She's just writing down everything you're saying
Washington, D.C.
And Honolulu, May 2nd
And that's all I have
Those are literally all of my dates
Wow, these shithead Those are literally off my dates.
Wow, these shitheads are hot off the presses.
I'll give them that.
Yes.
Eric Kleiber,
where can people see you?
Two weeks.
I'm in Sioux City
and Omaha
with Bobby Slayton.
Bobby Slayton?
Yeah.
I was in Dreamgirls.
Yeah.
They cut him out
of something, I think.
He was in something and got cut out.
Complains about it.
I would too.
I would too.
Craig Barrett got cut out of Jerry Maguire.
It happens sometimes.
Sucks.
Megan, you been cut out of anything?
I was just cut out of a movie that went to Sundance.
Oh, no.
Sleeping with other people.
Same director as Bessaret
I struck a nerve like that
No it's okay
I'm sorry
I'm in another movie that's premiering at
Try Back a Film Festival
But they just changed the name
Oh shit what's it called
It used to be called Bad Boys
Can you get it in seven names
It used to be called Bad Boys Crazy Girls
But now it's called something else
So look for a movie that's not called what it used to be called.
It's pretty much the easiest way to find a movie when you're looking them up is what they used to be called.
And check it out.
I'll be on at midnight next month.
You'll talk about it there.
You and Chris will chat about it for 2.5 seconds before we get into that fast-paced game.
But thank you so much for being here. And the only plug I want to throw in is
Douglas Movies is going to do its second annual Cinco de Mayo show
at the, I think, Rory, were you at the first one, maybe?
I did not remember.
At the Zanies in Rosemont.
Yeah, I think I was there.
I think that might have been you.
So maybe we'll get you back this time.
That's on May 5th.
Ooh, maybe a booking.
And thanks again to Rory Scoville,
Aaron Kleiber, and Megan Nuringer.
Everyone coming out on a warm afternoon.
And as always,
Chevy Chase is a shithead.
And Rory giving Man of Steel a good rating
is a shit hit.
Before we go, Douglas Movies is brought to you by DraftKings.com, America's favorite
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Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie.
Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky.
There's no room in his heart for you,
cause Doug loves movies!