Doug Loves Movies - Sarah Silverman, Nick Kroll, and Wayne Federman Guest
Episode Date: December 23, 2013Live from Cinefamily, Doug welcomes comics Sarah Silverman, Nick Kroll, and Wayne Federman to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https:/.../art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers, green and baby-sweet G-seats
With 50 Adam Popcorn kernels in his teeth
There's still not one that he won't see
Cause Doug loves movies
Hey everybody! Hey, everybody.
Hey.
Hey, how many people here come to Doug Loves Movies at the UCB Theater?
Well, this is what it looks like when we do it out on the road in a theater or a comedy club.
It's got a slightly different vibe to it. But tonight's show, because we have a movie interruption
coming up right after, is going to be UCB length. It's going to be a 45 minute Doug
Loves Movies. Did I mention that my name is Doug and I love movies? I didn't think it would
be a completely solid
reaction to that.
I thought there might be somebody
that goes, hi, Doug!
And yes, I am.
This is the final
episode of
Two Oceans 13
coming to you from CineFamily
in the Fairfax
District
of Los Angeles. It's Monday,
December 23rd. Did you guys bring
name tags?
Oh, look at that.
They're all on the left side.
That's weird. Okay, there's a couple
righties, but mostly it's
left-brained people and
signs I recognize from over at UCB.
Good luck to each and every one of you.
We have a pretty amazing prize bag tonight.
And how many people here tonight are CineFamily members?
Because this is all about indoctrination.
And it sounds like a few of you somehow have managed to escape
the web that is CineFamily.
But if you become
a member of CineFamily by Sunday
January 12th, you can come to the
awards interruption. Can't say
what awards.
Might be like a dog show
or something. But
there's another awards that day that it might be.
And we're going to interrupt
it. And we're also going to do a dining with Doug
and Karen Potluck out
in the patio. And it's all
for freezies. Cinefamily.org
if you're a member
you can come to that.
And then Irvine
if you're listening. I know you
guys in the audience might not be from Irvine.
But I'm doing a standup down there behind the orange curtain
at the Improv on December 26th, 27th, and 28th.
And then I'm shooting up to Sacramento for a December 29th stand-up show
and a December 30th Douglas Movies taping at the Sacramento Punchline.
So come see me in the holiday taint,
Irvine and Sacramento.
That's right, because it taint Christmas
and it taint New Year's.
It's the holiday taint.
Oh, and also be at the Knob Hill Masonic Temple
in San Francisco.
Yeah, I'm playing a temple, you guys.
Shit's blowing up.
And that's going to be
on New Year's Eve with lots of other
comics who have been on Douglas movies.
Rory Scovel and Bert Kreischer and
Moshe Kasher and Pete Holmes
and Hannibal Buress. Holy shit.
That's going to be a great show.
Okay. Prize bag.
Let's get into it.
I feel like Santa. It's pretty, I feel like Santa.
It's pretty heavy and full of a lot of flammable things.
So I'm not going to go down your chimney.
I'm just going to give it to you.
This is fun.
Why did somebody bring Fix-It Felix from,
Fix-It Felix doll from Wreck-It Ralph?
Why would that be here?
I've got no idea.
Why would somebody bring the sheet music
for Schindler's List?
The theme from Schindler's List.
You can learn it and play it.
Yeah, it's going to be kind of a Jewish show tonight
because they were the easiest for me to book
two days before Christmas.
Everyone I know that's not Jewish
was on a plane yesterday or the day before
or the day before that.
Somebody brought a copy of the TV series
The Americans from the FX network.
So maybe the president of FX is here.
This is a wacky bag tonight.
There's a lot of wackiness.
I brought a T-shirt from my new friends at a vaporizer company called Vape Exhale.
And it's a really fun design.
It's like the monkeys turning into man, but instead it's like there's just a monkey
and then a monkey smoking a joint
and then a monkey using a vape exhale.
So...
Oh, this is kind of neat.
The Standard Hotel sent me a really nice calendar
that has sexy models on it and stuff.
But, like, really? A calendar?
Like, what am I going to do with that?
What day is it?
Oh, I'll just look at my phone.
That never leaves my hand.
Some toothbrushes.
Somebody brought some toothbrushes.
And
a copy of
The Life and Times of Tim
from the HBO program
and one last thing that I
received this evening from
oh wait, not one last thing
there's 75 cents in change
an iTunes gift card
for $10
and two black Sharpies
okay, I'm just throwing
random shit from, I want
to get rid of all the stuff in my apartment
So I'm going to give it to you guys
But somebody from a company called
Am I pronouncing it right?
Cute Streak?
Because it kind of looks like
Cute Streak
I want to say steak for some reason
When I see it
I don't know why
But it's called Cute Streak
And it's cutestreak.com
and at cutestreak on Twitter.
Cute Streak Designs.
Alright.
She makes really cool
posters that are tributes to
motion pictures. This one is for
Groundhog's Day.
Since it's the most wintery
that's why I picked it for tonight.
But just to help promote
Cute Streak Designs
and these cool movie-related posters,
I'm going to give out
one of these at every
Douglas Movies for the next
several weeks.
But that's the one somebody's getting tonight.
And please help me
in welcoming to the stage
three of my favorite
Jewish individuals.
Nick Kroll, Wayne Fetterman,
and Sarah Silverman.
Do we have to be in the order?
This isn't on.
No. You to be in the order? No. Thank you.
Wayne Fetterman is concerned about what order
they are sitting in if it's according to
the introduction.
Yeah, yeah, so if you could please switch.
No, it's fine, it's fine.
I was told I would sit closest
to you, Doug.
Who told you that?
There is no one here that would have that conversation with you.
I got an email about it, I thought.
No?
That's Nick Kroll, everybody.
He brought...
Furthest from Doug.
Furthest one from Doug.
Thanks for my comment.
Nick brought a copy of the show that he's one of the voices on
called The Life and Times of Tim.
Yep.
Season three.
The final season, guys.
Oh, that was it?
Where it all got wrapped up.
Really?
Did Tim kill all of his enemies?
That would be amazing in the...
Yeah.
Or did he just go into a diner
and listen to a Journey song?
Yeah, basically.
That's the Return of the King, right?
The third season.
That's Wayne Fetterman, everybody.
Mixing up a movie in a TV chair.
Jumping in with something.
I don't understand.
You brought the Schindler's List music.
That's nice.
For Christmas.
You play piano, so you must know it then.
Oh, every Jew knows it.
Really?
Yeah, that's one of the things you learn at your bar mitzvah.
When Jewish people are pregnant,
you know how they play music for their baby to hear?
They play that.
The Schindler's List.
You have no idea how important it is in our community.
It's good.
You've got really depressed babies.
That's awesome. Sarah Silverman
is here, you guys.
Thank you so much.
She, of course, brought
Tix and Felix from Wreck-It Ralph
because she probably already gave away
all of her...
What was your character's name called?
Strawberry Fantastic?
Yeah, it was Strawberry Fantastic, fuckface.
I love that character, though.
What's she called?
Strawberry Fantastic.
No, liar! Tell me the real thing.
Her name.
Vanellope Von Schweetz.
Yeah, that's why I can't remember it.
It's crazy.
But I love it, though.
I love that character.
I love that movie.
That's one of the few animated movies of late
that I could actually watch repeatedly.
Yeah, I agree.
That was one of my favorite movies last year.
Was it this year?
When did it come out?
Last year, but the thing I love the most is how
Rob Schraub,
who we all know,
cried.
He was crying right off the bat
as soon as he saw Q-Bert out of work.
Tears.
It's devastating.
It was a tricky way to get
people that are not going to react emotionally
to a cartoon to really get involved.
Did you see Frozen?
I have not seen that yet.
I hear only good things.
I believe that Jack McBrayer
dressed up as Fix-It Felix
for Halloween this year.
I'm not doing a joke.
He literally was...
People were getting candy
they were coming
he was at a friend's house
and they would show up
and he was dressed as
Fix-A-Feeling
that's so awesome
yeah
was he hammered?
when I think Doug Benson
I think wordplay
who brought
who brought the toothbrushes?
I did
oh that was her
oh well you well you of all people,
your teeth are amazing.
Oh, Doug.
You've got really good teeth.
Can I tell you a story?
Please.
Every year I'd go to the dentist
and every year the dentist would say
you have to floss every day.
And then when I was 15,
I walked to the dentist and I was like,
oh, fuck him.
I'm going to floss every day. And then when I was 15, I walked out of the dentist and was like, fuck him. I'm gonna floss every day.
And see what he says next
year. And then I came in the next year
and he goes, you've been flossing.
I was like, oh my god, it's real.
And I ever since.
What was your dentist's name?
Dr. Argue.
Really?
No wonder you look so typical.
How can I make people like me less?
My mom
didn't like him because she said that
he would put his instruments
on her tits.
He'd rest his, like...
Yeah, he'd put his white cloth with all
his instruments on her chest.
Yeah.
Dentists, I think, are inherently
kind of sleazy.
One of the more sleazy professions.
They're all cokeheads.
They are.
They have so much access to nitrous.
50% of
dentists are cokeheads.
I'd say at least
60% own a version
of a Corvette or something in the Corvette family.
When does the Kroll show come back?
January.
Thank you.
Kroll show comes back on January 14th.
I have left the show.
Oh, that'll be interesting.
Do you think it'll
jump the shark, or do you think
they'll be able to go ahead?
I just creatively couldn't agree with the direction it was going in.
They brought Dan Harmon in.
Yeah, and it's great.
And I'm happy for him,
and it's going to be great, and I'm not affiliated with the show,
but I'm sure he'll do wonderful things with it.
I'm not being hostile.
This is a Valerie show all over again, right?
Yeah, Valerie.
Valerie Bertinelli?
No.
The rest knows what I'm talking about.
Oh, my God, yeah.
Valerie Harper was fired from her show,
but it was still called The Hogans or whatever.
No, it was called Valerie.
And then they changed it.
Valerie's family. Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, and her last name
was Hogan,
so they changed it
to The Hogans.
Yeah, it set precedence.
And she was...
I killed your bit,
and I took up more time,
and I apologize.
I'm going to get back to this.
Back to what?
What was happening?
Me leaving Kroll Show.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
There was enough of that.
Yeah. Yeah.
What I didn't get to say
is that I'm going to start
a show about dentists.
It's a reality show
all about dentists.
They're all up in people's mouths
all day long.
It's disgusting.
He was going to bring it around.
Yeah.
But then I came back to it.
I should have let it go.
Yeah.
The momentum was gone.
And you go,
but I don't want to be robbed of this.
But you still were. I was't want to be robbed of this. But you still
were.
I was
rob-shrobbed
of it.
Isn't it
weird, though,
that dentists
are so,
they really
yell at you
for cleaning
up your teeth
when, like,
won't they
make more
money if
everybody just
has shit
teeth?
It's a real
ugly cycle,
I'd say.
Because I
remember getting
lollipops when
I left the
dentist.
My fucking dentist has a plate of cookies chocolate chip cookies in the waiting area like when they almost put it almost put a sign next to
it saying fuck you speaking of wordplay my dentist I did is right opposite the
La Brea Tar Pits the the name of her dental outfit,
Miracle Smile.
Oh, because it's on the Miracle Mile.
That's where I go.
You mean Miracle, right?
What did I say?
Miracle.
I just didn't know if that was another word I didn't know. I was trying to say Miracle, but I said Miracle.
It's named after the actress Miracle Street.
I was trying to say miracle, but I said miracle.
It's named after the actress Miracle Street.
By the way, street is what I did say.
Believing that that was her last name.
Sarah, have you done another... Have you appeared in another motion picture since...
Or worked on one since the last time we talked?
Yeah, the cowboy one.
The cowboy one?
What was that?
Seth MacFarlane
Western called A Million Ways to Die
in the West. It's got
other great people in it, right? Oh my god.
I can't wait.
I think he'll be completely cut out, but it's gonna be
an amazing movie. He'll be cut out?
No, I don't know. I think it's...
I heard Ted saying that after his last movie.
I always count on that so that I can be happily Ted.
Yeah, Ted thought he was going to be cut out.
Yeah, Ted was originally played by Ted Danson.
But luckily they found someone with the same name.
Yeah, they Samantha Morton-ed her.
They changed it to a bear.
That was so weird that Mark Wahlberg was friends with Ted Danson.
They wrestled each other all the time.
Well, what was weird is Mark Wahlberg
as a boy would come by
Cheers, the bar.
Of course. As a young boy growing up
on the south side, he would go to Cheers
and jerk off Norm in the
bathroom.
It was a vicious...
If Cheers had had a season where they
started going down in the ratings, there would have been
an added child.
A reason to have a kid around.
But that didn't happen.
What's the movie called, Sarah?
A Million Ways to Die in the Woods.
Oh yeah, you said that.
It's coming out next summer or something?
May, Memorial Day.
That's summer-ish.
Kicking off the season.
How was it being in Western world?
It was incredible.
I mean, you shoot at this place called Bonanza Ranch.
It's where they shot Bonanza.
And it's a whole old-timey 1800s Western town that is just empty. It's a set.
Yeah, it's just one block.
Was there a guy there who was like,
I'm the guy who's been here forever and tell you all about
how John Wayne jerked off
a horse.
No, we got to have horseback riding lessons.
Did it hurt your tush?
Uh,
yes.
My front tush? Yes. My front tush.
And how are the horsebacks riding?
It's so fun.
I just want to gallop and gallop.
Right.
It hurts your front tush less if you're going fast, right?
Feels better.
I mean, that's how it is with my front dick.
I have a lot of issues dick I have a lot of issues
I have a lot of issues with like you know
what do they call it like a gallop
or I need them to fucking run
or it hurts my dick
my front dick
back dick doesn't even come into it
stays out of it
and Wayne are you going to have the next international
Wayne Fetterman
Film Festival
here at CineFamily?
Yes, I am.
When's that going to happen?
It's going to happen
the first week of May,
although I don't know
if I can announce it here.
We're doing a special
matinee version of it
as part of the
Riot Festival
next month.
Oh, right.
Why wouldn't you be able
to say that?
Riot Festival's on sale and whatnot? Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I mean here. I don't want to... Oh, why wouldn't you be able to say that? Riot Festival's on sale and whatnot.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I mean here.
Oh, it's in a family.
It's a family. Sometimes family members
go off and do things that are more interesting.
It's not...
There's no reason for them to be upset.
So we got...
You're going downtown. It's a different part of town.
Different vibe.
Different demo.
All these same fucking people are going to be there.
But I love you guys.
So we got, I'll tell you the comedian,
you guess the film.
Because usually...
What a game. Let's fuck my show.
Let's play your game, Wayne.
Yeah, it's
Kevin Nealon.
He is going to show...
Roxanne!
He's in Roxanne.
I don't think Kevin Nealon would show something that he did.
Oh, I thought it was one they were in.
No, no, no.
This is a movie that helped shape them.
Right, you did Crimes of Mr. Maynard.
Yeah, remember that, Sarah?
You participated in this.
I know, I forgot.
I know I did, yeah.
I'll give you a hint.
It was remade not well by the Farrelly brothers.
Oh, he's gonna...
What?
There was a first Shallow Hal?
What did the...
This movie was a remake.
I can't even remember
The Three Stooges one recently
Oh
That's not a
It's
The Heartbreak Kid
Oh
Right
Have you ever seen that?
The original Heartbreak Kid
Yeah yeah yeah
Why are we talking about it?
Okay
You asked the question
No I'm sincerely asking you
Why
Because Kevin Nealon
Picked it to screen it
At the Wayne Federman
matinee.
Oh, with the original
Heartbreak Kid.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
God, that'd be weird
if he chose the new one.
That's what I'm saying.
Jesus, Kevin.
I wish we could
unsmoke pot sometimes.
No, I'm good.
This is called comedy.
I, uh...
I love that movie.
That's a great choice.
I will be there that night. Probably not. But I will come if I could. It's a matinee. That's a great choice.
I will be there that night.
Probably not.
But I will come if I could.
It's a matinee.
It's a matinee.
Charles Grodin was in one of my other picks for a movie I wanted to do for you.
Let me guess.
Are you trying to figure out what it is?
It's going to be hard, maybe.
Maybe not.
Clifford.
You know it. I know. I'm sorry I forgot. I'm sorry I ruined hard, maybe. Maybe not. Is it Clifford? You know it.
I know.
I'm sorry I forgot.
I'm sorry I ruined it.
But he had a great movie.
Clifford is insane.
That movie is crazy.
I love that movie.
Sarah loves it.
Tell us why you love it.
Tell us why you love it.
Why?
Is there some reason that I've said?
I love it.
It's hilarious.
Martin Short plays a 10-year-old kid.
I'll watch anything with Martin Short in it.
Totally.
He could not be more
annoying in that.
Agreed to disagree.
I mean, that's the comedy. That's the joke
is that Charles Grodin is annoyed with him.
Yeah, but it's
total pleasure.
Was that in his contract?
In Charles Grodin's contract that he had to
be annoyed by whoever he was doing his scene
with? I, you know, worked in all the Beethoven movies.
I like the name of his first biography or autobiography.
It's called It Would Be So Nice If You Weren't Here.
That Grodin.
That's cute.
Who else is going to be at the...
That's it.
It's just one.
It's just a one-off.
Oh, that's a one-off.
It's a matinee for the kids.
In the afternoon.
It's for the kids. I think you're probably on Sunday then, right? Saturday. Saturday at just a one-off. Oh, that's a one-off. It's a matinee for the kids. In the afternoon. It's for the kids.
I think you're probably on Sunday then, right?
Saturday. Saturday at 2. Saturday at 2.
So following that, probably
separate admission price will be me doing it
at Doug Ray's movies. In fact, we're thinking of maybe
starting at 1.20 just to give you
enough time.
You started at 4.20 that day, right? That's right.
So same day, right before your show.
And you know, the discussion of Clifford,
that could last more than 90 minutes.
See, they're into it.
Oh, Heartbreak Kid, yeah.
I switched movies on you.
Make him show Clifford.
I can't wait.
I have not seen Heartbreak Kid in a long time.
You'd like it, huh?
It's so good.
It's so good, because it's of the 70s,
when a movie could just completely change gears partway through
and not exactly where the fucking script doctors
have told you exactly where that stuff should happen.
It's really interesting and funny.
I think the script doctor's music is completely underrated.
And you know I like to call you Little Can Be Wrong.
Little Miss Can Be Wrong.
So
but back, and then in May
you'll do more of those. And then in May, back here
we're going to do another five, I assume.
Like five of them. I can't get comfortable
on stage. I just want to say that I can't
figure out how to sit up here on
stage. Engage your core.
Engage my core? Okay, thank you.
And everything will be on.
All right, sorry.
Let's keep going then.
That's all I needed.
Don't you have to do, aren't you like sometimes in a position to have to do like audience
Q&As where you sit in chairs like this in front of a audience?
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, sure, sure.
No, he's never experienced this before.
Yeah, well, I'm just saying like why is this where suddenly you have to say how uncomfortable
it makes you?
Well, because of that, you know, I'm just engaging, trying to be honest
up here.
Trying to make this an honest conversation
between us.
Truth and comedy.
We're in danger of slipping into lies
and misinformation.
So I'm glad
you're here, Nick, to do that.
We're going to interrupt the movie.
This is the first ever
Doug Loves Movies followed after
a smoke break
by a
feature film here at
CineFamily. And the movie we're interrupting is
How the Grinch Stole Christmas. I just want to
gauge each of your
Sarah's surprise
after all the emails
that have Grinch, the word Grinch in them.
I thought it was called Grinch.
They should have.
They should have just called it Grinch.
I wouldn't mind watching
Miracle on 34th Street.
You know, the original one
would be fun to,
or even the John Hughes one
would be fun to do an interruption of.
Maybe we'll do that next year. Because it's a great movie
but it's not like
there are things you can make fun of.
It's not bulletproof.
The movie.
Sorry.
Damon Wayans and Adam Sandler?
Yes.
Correct.
Are we playing
the Leonard Maltin game today?
We are, yes.
Right now.
Do you know that's where
Damon Wayans Jr. was conceived?
I'm steamrolling.
Damon Wayans and Adam Sandler
met on that movie
and had Damon Wayans Jr.
That kid's a talent.
Yeah, he is.
That Damon Wayans Jr.
That was the worst thing
that happened to New Girl
that he was stuck over
on Happy Endings. Yeah, he's a funny guy. Yeah, Jr. That was the worst thing that happened to New Girl, that he was stuck over on Happy Endings.
Yeah, he's a funny guy.
Yeah, yeah.
I like the other guy they got instead.
Yeah, he did our show this year.
Lamorne?
Yeah, he was really funny on our show.
Yeah, that guy's awesome.
Yeah.
The Grinch, though, have you seen it any time recently?
I've never seen the movie.
I've obviously seen that TV special many a time.
Yeah, yeah.
Are you going to show that?
They took a 22 minute masterpiece
and turned it into an hour and 45
minutes of bullshit.
And this is
Jim Carrey and not Mike Myers.
Is that right?
That's correct. Mike Myers went over and ruined
Cat in the Hat
for generations to come.
All the great comics have to ruin something
for somebody.
Steve Martin with the Pink Panther.
What the fuck is that about?
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
What?
I don't want to take up too much time.
I think I have a story.
I'll keep it short.
For some reason, years ago,
I don't know what, I don't know.
What you can say and what you're going to say?
I got asked to be, you know how people ask you to be in a table read,
and it was for the Pink Panther, but it wasn't Steve Martin.
It was Chris Tucker.
But they had Jeremy Piven read the part,
and Chris Tucker just watched.
Did Jeremy Piven try to do a Chris Tucker voice?
No, he was great.
He pivoted?
He just did it his own way.
I think maybe Chris Tucker wanted to hear it out loud.
I have no idea.
I was like, whatever.
That does make sense.
Just to kind of hear what it says.
Yeah, but why not ask Omar Epps to do it?
He was riding
the program.
I'm offended by that.
But Jeremy Pippen,
like, oh, I want to hear what this sounds like
if a guy that's nothing like me reads it.
This is the story that makes me laugh, though.
The guy
who was asked to read the scene...
That didn't sound anything like Jeremy Pippen.
And he was great.
But I think you were doing a voice
different than your own voice
to see what it would sound like.
Guys, I'm Jeremy Pippen!
I play a Jew.
We all sound like this.
Yeah, hug it out.
I have mercury poisoning.
Hug it out, hug it out.
It's Friday.
Come on.
What are you,
you don't got nothing
to do tomorrow.
Smoke weed.
Jackie Chan.
Hey, what do you want
to do Friday next?
So Sarah,
what's the point of that story?
The point of the story was the guy that was, you know, hired or asked to read the stage directions and everything.
I sat down and we were having small talk before we started.
And he goes, I'm so nervous.
You know, I am.
I just don't want to mess up.
And I go, let me tell you something that's going to make you feel so much better.
Nobody's thinking about you.
Like everyone, you know, but everyone's worried about their own thing.
They're not worried that someone else is.
Don't worry about it.
Just, you know, everyone's doing their thing.
And then we started, and I looked up at the director,
and I saw him.
While the guy was reading the stage directions,
I saw the director turn to the man on his right and go,
he's terrible.
I was shocked.
And they switched him.
In the middle of the read?
Yeah.
Wow.
That is harsh.
Wow, and it was the worst part
was it was Eric Stoltz.
I know.
Back to the Future? Yeaholtz. I know.
Back to the Future, though?
Yeah, yeah.
Wow.
Poor guy.
He's good in the mass.
That's a great Doug Loves Movies joke.
It really is.
Yeah, Eric Stoltz, it worked out good.
Can you imagine if he had no career,
how bad that would be?
That guy would kill himself.
But Eric Stoltz, he's done a lot of good stuff.
He directs episodics now.
Yeah, good for him.
You know who I miss? I always like him in stuff, especially Noah Baumbach stuff.
I miss Bridget Fonda.
How come she's not in stuff?
What the fuck happened to her?
She's so amazing in Jackie Brown.
Yeah.
She married the guy from
Oingo Boingo and then just fucking went
by-go.
By-go?
By-go? Oingo By-go?
I'm just trying to do wordplay
like you and John.
That's all I can do.
Have you seen The Grinch, Sarah?
Which one? The Grinch or
The Grinch of Christmas?
This one that we're going to watch.
Yeah, the whole thing.
Are they both...
They're both called the same name.
But one of them is a motion picture.
No, no, I didn't.
I saw...
I remember when it came out
and seeing some things on E.T.
It just didn't interest me.
On Entertainment Tonight?
Yeah.
Do you watch Entertainment Tonight?
No, I don't.
I mean, when you're in the business,
listen to E.T.
to know what's going on. You don't fucking I mean, when you're in the business, you do. To know what's going on.
Yeah. You don't fucking
cross Menounos when you're in the
same game.
But speaking of games, we have to
play one. As
Sarah mentioned earlier,
just having so much fun, I let the chat
portion run long. But you guys are pros.
You know how to play the Leonard Mullen game, so this will
move quickly. But we
do need to select who you're going to be playing for.
So if everyone could show their name tags
at this time.
If you guys could go physically take
the name tag from the person
or at the very least ask them
to move forward with it.
And while they do that,
we'll do this. We'll be right back.
And we're back.
There we go.
Who are you playing for, Nick?
Nick Kroll.
I don't know.
Where's the name?
On the top?
Yeah.
Candy.
What's it say?
Candy Mandrew.
Candy Mandrew.
Oh, and it's a takeoff on the Candyman?
Yeah.
Candymandrew.
And it's got a bunch of tiny candy bars. It's an eye. Is it a movie? Candyman. Oh, the Candyman? Candyman drew, and it's got a bunch of tiny candy bars. It's an eye.
Is it a movie?
Oh, the Candyman.
Jesus Christ, Nick, don't say it
three times.
Doug Benson.
Yeah, there's actual candy on it.
That was a close one. I know.
What if we, like, do you guys, would you mind if we, like, skipped one reel of Grinch tonight?
Just so that we can do this, go a little long on this, and then get done in time?
Like, who cares if we skip one reel?
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. I haven't seen... This is my chance
to see The Grinch.
One real?
Which one?
Just chosen a red
but preferably the last one.
The roast beef part?
The last one
where all the Who's
realized they're assholes
and The Grinch was right
that they shouldn't
take Christmas so seriously.
It's the weirdest reinvention
of that movie.
We can eat these. We can eat a couple of these, right?
Eat what? We can eat a couple of the
candy bars off of the thing. Of course you can.
Okay, great.
There are no take fives on here,
which is a real bummer.
You just don't see take fives
out and about enough. No, they're
tough to get. They don't make them in mini either.
The 100 grand, same thing.
They don't make them in mini.
Yes, they do.
Into this mini?
Who are you playing for, Sarah?
They 100% have 100 grand.
Maybe I'm thinking of crackles.
You're thinking Snickers.
That is the same rhythm as what you're talking about, Willis.
I know, but let's move this along.
Doug, you literally phrased it like,
what are you talking about, Willis?
That's the quote that goes around all the best guests at some point,
saying, let's move this along.
Like I was slowing it down.
I was looking into your eyes and saying what I saw.
Yeah, you saw that look.
It's your turn to call, raise, or
fold. Who are you
playing for? Amy.
And she brought a
tiny little stuffed version of
Deadpool. Yeah.
It's called the
Dollpool. And her name is Amy.
And what is that?
That's the character that was played
by Ryan Reynolds in
that shitty Wolverine movie.
What was
it called? Deadpool?
Really? Yeah. Looks like
Spider-Man.
I'm sorry. It's baby Spider-Man.
It's like outdoors or baby Spider-Man,
right? It's outdoorsy. Yeah, he's got like a... Sweater-Man. Yeah. Well, he's made out-Man. It's like Outdoors or Baby Spider-Man, right? It's outdoorsy.
Yeah, he's got like a... He's like Sweater-Man.
Yeah.
Well, he's made out of sweater-y material.
Yeah.
It's like a baby from Marin County,
like Spider-Man Marin County.
We're definitely cutting a reel from Grinch.
Yeah, that's fine.
If you keep doing this.
Well, I'm about to go off on a bad kid diatribe,
so you better...
Who are you playing for, Wayne?
I'm playing...
This is amazing.
This is... It says no Courtney for old men
But here's the thing, if you don't announce who's on the show
This girl Courtney drew perfect
Images of myself, Sarah
And Nick
I don't know how she did it
Like we didn't
Announce it, did you?
No, no, it was a complete surprise
I saw it, my legs buckled I was like, how did know how I saw it. I was like, my legs buckled.
I was like,
how did she do that?
And so I was like,
I have to play for Courtney.
That's great.
That's ridiculous.
That's a great
realizing of us.
She might work for the NSA
because there's no way
she would know
that we were on this show together.
This bit is done.
It's over.
Joss did every angle.
We've got five minutes.
Look over, he's on his phone.
This is some real Jack Bauer shit.
Okay.
That's coming back.
Is the show coming back?
Or are they making a movie out of it?
Yeah, it's like a movie, I think.
A movie? Or maybe it's a show out of it? Yeah, it's like a movie, I think.
A movie?
Or maybe it's a show, but it's like a shorter run.
It's like eight episodes.
Eight hours?
So it doesn't go 24 hours, it goes... Eight.
It jumps different hours within 24.
Do they have to go to the bar in Los Angeles
where Kiefer Sutherland lives?
They're shooting the whole thing at La Pubelle
How come they're not dragging out that clip
Of him tackling that Christmas tree
It's the perfect time of year
Remember when he got drunk and just dove at a Christmas tree
Like Jack Bauer's like
Fuck this tree
This tree's a terrorist
We have three minutes
To finish this game
Doug we haven't To finish this game.
Doug, we haven't even started this game.
I know, right?
It's exciting.
Harold and Maude.
One point to Nick.
I was going to guess that.
We're going to start with Wayne and then go to Sarah and then go to Nick because it's based on the order you arrived here tonight.
Sarah got here first.
So Sarah, then Wayne, then Nick.
Sarah, pick a category.
Would you like Talk to the Hand?
That's movies that have sign language in them.
The Spectacular Now?
That's movies that are out right now
that got more than 80% on Rotten Tomatoes.
Or Forest Chump? And that's movies that are out right now that got more than 80% on Rotten Tomatoes. Or Forest Chump.
And that's movies where someone is taken out into
and then killed in the woods.
Does real life count?
Yes, it might be a documentary.
Miller's Crossing.
Do you really think that's how this game works?
Fargo. Fargo. Six. Six Fargos.
Which category, Sarah?
Oh, what are they again?
Spectacular Now, Out in the Woods, or...
Talk to the Hand, the movies with sign language.
Oh, I don't like any of these.
Spectacular Now, you've seen some movies there. I with sign language. I don't like any of these. Spectacular Now?
You've seen some movies.
I really haven't.
I haven't.
But go ahead.
Yeah, Spectacular Now.
Gravity.
Okay, good.
I'm glad you went with Spectacular Now
because the answer to Forrest Chump
was, of course, the movie
that you already blurted out.
Is that true?
No.
Oh, no.
Good.
This movie that's in theaters now,
got more than 80% from Rotten Tomatoes,
is...
Battle of the Year?
Leonard writes a long-ass review.
He says...
It's not Battle of the Year?
Oh, this movie tells two parallel stories.
That's a great clue clue about dance and about life
I'm not going to say what two stories it tells Nick
you know me better than that
but he also says about this movie
that
a person that
and don't guess if you know it in the audience
or talk loudly about it.
Sometimes when you're
sitting on a couch, you just can't help yourself.
Did someone go, it's battle of the year?
I think I heard somebody say something about
American Hustle, or maybe they were just
saying to the person sitting next to them,
oh, by the way, are you American?
They were like, what's that
new Scorsese movie
that just came out?
American Hustle?
He also calls this movie charming and heartwarming
and he lists
ten names.
How many names do you think you can name it in
Sarah? You'd say whoa no matter
how many names I said.
I was hoping it would be like two
or one and then I could guess.
Oh, really? How many
movies have two or one people in them?
Oh, All Is Lost.
Clever.
It's definitely not All Is Lost.
Although actually there were nine different
plankton that he encountered
that Leonard listed.
Ten names?
Yeah, you can open with that bid.
You can just say ten names.
You get all the names.
I guess I'll say that I could name it in nine names.
Oh, that's fine.
Wayne, what do you think?
I'll name it in four names.
Wow!
Wayne goes to a lot of movies, Nick.
Keep that in mind.
Wayne is very up to date on his movies
My goal in this game is not to win
Oh, interesting
Who are you playing for again?
Candy Mandrew
Candy Mandrew's gonna get it
The name is out there
It's already served its purpose for him
Whatever happens, we're gonna eat the chocolates
It's a huge eye
This is the kind of spontaneous publicity
that makes people.
Especially if you're named Navin Johnson.
Yeah, there's a quote on there from Leonard
Malton, so Malton's getting some play.
Everybody's getting a little love.
Name it in four.
Name it in four, he says.
Yeah, yeah.
Your four names, Wayne, are Kathy Baker,
Rachel Griffiths,
BJ Novak, and Ruth Wilson.
And the movie's called?
Saving Mr. Banks.
That's correct.
How was it?
Wayne Fetterman came to play.
Yeah, yeah.
Well, I love that movie it's based on.
Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.
Oh, really?
Yeah, yeah.
It's incredible.
Incredible.
Yeah, it's the making of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.
Really?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. The whole Yeah, it's the making of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The whole story behind it.
It's really good.
Isn't that Aukerman's show?
Wheels are always...
Oh, and the wheels are...
On Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.
All right, we get to start with Sarah again.
Sarah just now getting it.
And then we'll go to Nick.
I've got a five-second delay.
I hope Wayne just takes this down in two rounds.
That would be fantastic.
But Sarah, you get to pick a category again.
Would you like Bay of Pigs?
That's movies that have cops in San Francisco.
Or We Shot a Zoo, Bay of Pigs. That's movies that have cops in San Francisco. Or
We Shot a Zoo, which of course
is movies that have hunting in them.
Or Glad He Ate Her.
Gladiator.
And that is movies that have
cannibals in them.
Cannibal movies.
Any of you guys cannibals?
Fuck.
What are the first two?
Bay of Pigs, that's Cops in San Francisco,
or hunting movies, We Shot a Zoo.
We shot a zoo.
Is that Jeremy Piven?
Wait, is that Jeremy Piven?
You didn't know?
You didn't know?
This is incredible.
Bay of Pigs.
You're going to do a one-man show as Piven.
Which?
And it's just called Piven.
Bay of Pivens?
Bay of Pivens.
Which one do you want, Sarah?
That one gets a thumbs down.
That's fair.
Hey, I did it not into the podcast for you.
Yeah, yeah, it was supposed to be just for us.
But which category, Sarah?
The first one, Bay of Pigs.
Okay, okay.
Yeah, it was supposed to be just for us.
But which category, Sarah?
The first one, baby.
Okay, okay.
This movie that has cops in San Francisco is from 1982.
Three and a half stars from Leonard.
I might even go to four stars if he asks me.
He calls this movie a slam-bang mix
of some things.
And he also says that there was a sequel.
And he lists says that there was a sequel. And he lists
14 names.
14 names.
So how many names do you think you can get in
this movie from 1982?
I think I could get it in two, actually.
And then I remembered you start the names from the end.
Yeah, yeah, you gotta remember.
That's idiot.
1982.
14 names?
I feel like this is something where I have a guess already,
but I would need
all 14 names
if I actually... I could say either
14 or 0. I can't. And then just go
for it.
Sounds like you're probably going to say 14.
I tell you what, I'm breaking the rules.
Whatever you say, I'm going to say name it.
Oh, it's just me and you?
No, it's all of us, but we want you to try.
No, Nick doesn't know that, but I'll say.
But also Nick is next anyway.
I'll say 11 names.
All right.
I'll say name it.
It goes to Nick.
Okay.
Yeah. Yeah, it's much better to engage the game.
This isn't going to help.
I don't want to miss a real list.
We're four minutes over. Here's your 11 names.
And if you don't get this,
I'll be surprised.
Yeah, because the 11th name
is The Bus Boys.
Then the rest of the names are
Jim Haney, Olivia Brown, Denise Crosby,
Jonathan Banks,
James Keen,
Brian James, Sonny Landon.
It's Breaking Bad. I heard Jonathan.
Thanks.
How many names did you get?
Nine? Eleven.
Eleven.
David Patrick Kelly,
Frank McRae,
and James Remar.
Oh my god, I've heard of that last guy.
I mean,
I have no idea.
I don't even know why I picked this category.
But all I can think of is
oh, wait a minute.
What is it?
Pull it out Come on
Any which way you can
But loose
Dirty Harry
Dirty Harry
Dirty Harry the Revenge
The Busboys was a band
That have like
There's a lengthy scene
Where they're performing
In the background of a bar
Where Eddie Murphy Is excited about background of a bar where Eddie Murphy
is excited
about being in a bar after being...
Correct.
But unfortunately,
the point goes to Nick Kroll.
Boo.
Right? Because he told her to name it.
Totally, totally, totally.
And that got Harold and Maude right earlier.
That's a win. That sounds like a win. It's a win for him, totally. And I got Harold and Maude right earlier. That's a win. That sounds like a win.
It's a win for him, yes.
It's not a win for me because I'm trying to wrap this up.
What?
Right, but I got two points.
We got to watch a whole hour and 45 minute piece of crap.
And by the way, it's a reel.
There are different reels.
It's like it came on film.
Like we get to watch an original print of The Grinch Stole Christmas?
Probably. We try to go with the
prints whenever we can, but we'll fall
back on a DVD or
a...
DCP? Yeah, you know me.
What's your rap name?
Doug Cuts People? What does that stand for? So we start with Wayne and then we go to Nick. Wayne, would you That's your rap name. Doug cuts people?
What does that stand for?
So we start with Wayne,
and then we go to Nick.
Wayne, would you like... Oh, Jesus.
We are farmers.
And that's movies that have sheep in them.
Sheep, okay.
Or the thin red line,
that's movies where the title is misspelled on purpose.
Or accidentally. It just went all the way up red line. That's movies where the title is misspelled on purpose. Or accidentally.
It just went all the way up the line.
And...
Or life takes visa, and that's
the movies where someone gets deported.
I'll take
the thin red line. Thin red line.
This movie title is Misspelled.
Yeah, it's from
1991. Three stars
from Leonard. He calls this movie sober
and thoughtful
and he also says that the director has a
bit part as a mailman
and he lists
eight names
how many names do you think you get it in
Wayne Fetterman
five
okay
Nick Kroll should I do what I do every time I don't know, five? Okay.
Nick Kroll?
Should I do what I do every time?
Well, if you say name it, we'll have a winner for sure.
It'll be you or Wayne.
So name it, right?
You guys all ready to die?
Is everybody on stage ready to die? Yeah.
This is tough.
91, right?
Mm-hmm.
And it's misspelled.
The title's misspelled. The title's misspelled.
Wait, I'm just trying to think what won
Best Picture in 1991.
Why did it have to win Best Picture?
It didn't.
That's your reference point.
I had a hook into that year.
What did you decide won in 91?
I can't remember.
I know
Dancers with Wolves won in
90, right?
And that is the wolves are spelled with a Z at the end.
91. Sober, thoughtful.
The director has a bit part
as a mailman and your
four names
are Whitman Mayo?
Yes, I know. Wait. Yeah, that's a black guy.
That is a black guy.
Angela Bassett.
Tyra Farrell.
And Morris Chestnut.
Okay, alright.
It's a Jewish movie.
I got it.
Misspelled title.
What's it called?
A Hero Ain't Nothing
But a Sandwich.
Which part of that
was misspelled?
Ain't is not
actually correct.
Can I guess?
Isn't is actually
the word.
Okay.
But that's the way
they do it in the community.
They do it like that.
Ain't was spelled correctly.
It's a made up word eight was spelled correctly. It's a made-up word that was spelled correctly.
Wait.
It's the Illuminati.
It's spelled eight wrong.
What do you think it is, Nick?
I think it's Boys in the Hood.
That's correct.
You win-win.
With a Z.
You double win.
Yeah, so I'm going to eat all the fucking chocolate off of this guy's fucking poster now, then.
Where's Candyman? Where is he?
Candyman Drew.
He or she, Man Drew.
Sorry, Courtney.
Where you at? Come get your prizes.
Are you an artist?
No.
No.
No.
Really?
Did your daughter's paint that you used?
I hope you give your daughter all the gifts, then.
She's probably going to miss that candy also But congratulations
And thanks for
I guess he doesn't want the sign back
And does both of your
Wayne and Sarah, do your name tags have shitheads
On the back of them that I can read here at the end?
There's something here
Hidden in the harness.
That's exciting.
Oh, that's an interesting one.
Courtney crushed it.
And besides
Kroll Show coming back in
January on Comedy Central, what else have you got
to plug, Nick?
Really, Kroll Show,
my singular focus is to tell, if any of you guys like Kroll Show, my singular focus is to
tell, if any of you guys like Kroll Show,
tell anyone and everyone about
it constantly, okay?
So just go out there and really promote
the show for me.
Yeah, don't even stay for
How the Grinch Stole Christmas. Get out there.
Start telling people about
Kroll Show. Pay for the street.
Yeah, because I'm legally
not allowed to work
on the show anymore
because I announced
my leaving from it.
But I still want people
to watch it.
Sarah, what do you got
coming up?
Your HBO special's
available on demand?
Is it?
Sure it is.
Yeah.
That's a good plug for you, right? You know, writing off
that, we are miracles and
starting over.
New material and
a new attitude.
Best plug we've ever had. Wayne?
What do you got coming up? I have four lines
on a TV show called The Neighbors.
That's about it.
What are the lines?
Do you remember your lines?
Lines, lines.
The first line is this.
Again, I'm playing a guy from New Jersey,
so it's going to sound a little
different than the normal way.
No.
It's from Fort Lee, not Bayo.
So, uh...
Hey, I'm Bon Jovi.
Like, oh!
This is not exactly what we were
expecting.
That's the first line.
Wow.
Oh! A lot of layers.
A lot of layers.
Yeah, you really... climb. Wow. Oh. A lot of layers. A lot of layers. Oh. Yeah.
You really did a good job. And also I have this. Hopefully
it'll be out when we do the film
festival. A special
thing records is doing a career
retrospect three
CD Wayne Fetterman stand up.
That's fun. Yeah.
For the eight people who will buy that.
None of whom I'm related to.
When's that going to come out?
I think in May.
It goes all the way from the back.
We'll have you back on. We'll talk about it then.
Congratulations on
not winning tonight.
I'm going to be at the Orlando Improv
January 4th and 5th.
Getting Doug with High returns at 4.15
Pacific Time on Wednesday, January 8th. YouTubeth and Getting Doug With High returns at 4.15 Pacific Time on Wednesday, January
8th. YouTube.com
slash Doug Benson. Nick,
can you come on that show and smoke weed with me?
On which?
My show, Getting Doug With High. Can you
smoke weed on camera?
I don't know if I can handle that
to be honest with you. Really?
You're more of a private weed smoker? No, I mean, I'm
pretty open about it,
but there's something about it that
now I have a card and everything,
but I do feel like they can still
take me away to some camp.
Well, that sounds like fun to me.
I love going to camp.
Going to Jews really is like...
Do they have a swing set?
Yeah, I feel like it is. Do they have a swing set? Yeah, it is.
Do they have scary stories
around the fire?
Doug, I would do your show
if you did cocaine.
But otherwise, I would not do your show.
I get it.
Alright.
When we launch
Getting Doug With Fucked,
I will definitely give you a call.
And thank you to all of my guests,
Nick Kroll, Sarah Silverman,
Wayne Fetterman.
They're all going to stick around
and interrupt How the Grinch
Stole Christmas with me.
We're going to have a short break,
so if you want to step outside
and do whatever it is you like to do outside,
by all means do so
and as always
X-Men Origins Wolverine is a shithead
and
Cindy Lou Who is a shithead Watch another talkie. Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky.
There's no room in his heart for you.
Cause Doug loves movies.