Doug Loves Movies - Shooter Jennings, Chris Cubas and Geoff Tate guest
Episode Date: August 24, 2015Live from Hyena's in Dallas, Doug welcomes Shooter Jennings, Chris Cubas and Geoff Tate to the show. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://...art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers screaming, maybe sticky seeds with 50 azepop or kernels in his teeth.
There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug loves movies! Hey, hey, hey, everybody.
You guys were clapping so loud
that nobody could even hear the theme song.
That was pretty sweet,
and I guess I got to brace myself
for what's about to happen, because my name is sweet, and I guess I gotta brace myself for what's about to happen.
Because my name is Doug
and I love movies!
Ha ha ha!
I love movies!
Ha ha ha!
Some of you didn't know
what you were supposed to do.
Coming to you once again
from Hyena's Comedy Club
in Dallas, Texas.
I ran out here without my drink.
So wait here, you guys.
I'm going to go back and get it.
Now, can I get another Tito's and Soda when you get a chance?
Tito's Handmade Vodka is from Texas.
Let's see what else I got on this piece of paper.
It's Saturday, August 22nd, 2015 at 420-ish.
Let me see your name tags, Dallas.
I know you brought a lot of...
Oh, Lord.
What an amazing... I don't even know
where to start.
They're all really big because it's Texas.
There's a lot of light up shit.
There's a donut situation.
Young Kevin
Stein. Hunter
Park. It's your name.
I get it.
They're name tags. You totally know what's going on.
I retweeted that thing where I've got a Bane mask on that doubles as a bong.
I saw that on Twitter today.
Somebody's just holding up like a stormtrooper helmet.
Thank you. Tip your weight, Steph.
Oh, Blandy?
What's your name?
Annie?
Andy Oh, okay, so you made it Blandy
Like Black Annie, Blandy
I love it
And then there's Jurassic Marcus
I want Jurassic Marcus and Hunter Park to have a fight
I want them to have a dinosaur fight
Dumb and Duggar, I resemble that remark Hunter Park to have a fight. I want them to have a dinosaur fight.
Dumb and Duggar. I resemble that remark.
Denise's Christ
Superstar?
I saw
that one on Twitter today, too. What's it say?
The shit...
The Scott Man?
Okay.
Josh, I've seen that before, right?
I don't know.
Your face and hair, you look like Wolverine,
but you went with a Jaws theme.
Because I guess Josh-erine wouldn't work.
Well, thank you guys for bringing all those.
There's a Da Vinci Code thing that's blinking.
What's your name, though?
Da Vinci Cody.
The blinking lights made it hard to read.
But finally, somebody took the Da Vinci Code poster
and put some fancy lights on it.
Who's coming tomorrow to the Alamo Drafthouse in Richardson?
Richardson.
Who's coming tomorrow to the Alamo Drafthouse in Richardson?
Tickets are still available for the 420 interruption of Johnny Mnemonic.
I apologize for showing that movie, but I've never seen it.
I was wondering what the lack of fuss was about.
And then at 8 o'clock, I'm going to join the Master Pancake fellas Out of Austin, Texas And we're going to mock Roadhouse 2
At 8 o'clock
So if you're not coming tomorrow
To either of those
I don't know what your problem is
Maybe you have a job or a life or some shit
Wichita, Kansas
I'm doing stand-up this Thursday
August 27th
At the Crown Uptown.
That sounds like a fancy club or theater.
And then Los Angeles, Doug Loves Movies returns to Meltdown Comics this Sunday, August 30th at 420.
Here's some other cities I'm visiting soon.
Columbia, Missouri, Seattle, you know where that is.
Orlando over there.
Boston up that way.
And Providence right nearby.
Look for your town at douglovesmovies.com.
And then write to me on Twitter about how I'm not coming to your town.
And then I'll write back, I was just there.
And then you'll write back, damn, I missed it.
And then we'll both smoke a bowl.
Now it's time for Tweet Relief, tweets about movies.
In response to a recent Whose Tagline Is It Anyway game on this show,
at Rogue Ginger tweeted,
I totally thought the tagline, The Hottest Thing on Wheels,
would have been for The Theory of Everything.
This has been Tweet Relief
Sexy Stephen Hawking Edition.
I got a bag full of prizes.
And then there's like,
I gotta tell the other guests, can you
bring that big bag that I left backstage
on with you, one of you guys?
Please?
Somebody brought, who's the person that brought a big bag of shit that's all movie related? That
was you? Oh my God, there's so much stuff in that bag. It's ridiculous. But thank you.
Where did you get all that stuff? I work for a bunch of different marketing companies.
He works for marketing companies, you guys. So are you here with your girlfriend today?
If you want to call him a girlfriend.? Do you want to call him a girlfriend?
I don't want to call him a girlfriend.
That seems rude.
If he's your gay lover, that's one thing.
But there's no reason to call him your girlfriend.
Well, thanks for bringing that stuff, dude.
I'll give away some of it today and then the rest of it on future episodes because there's a lot of fun stuff in there.
I brought a copy of Promotional Tool,
my most recent CD,
a Doug Loves Movies T-shirt,
and from Tempe, Arizona,
Spinelli's Pizza gave me a shirt
that I probably wouldn't ever wear,
so I thought I'll bring that.
I wore it once on Getting Doug With High,
and they keep sending them to me,
so I keep giving them away.
The board game that's only owned
by people who win at Doug Lo's movies.
It's Schmovie!
And, oh, and a dude just gave this to me
in a bar next door.
It's a documentary called Beyond Pollution
about the BP oil spill. I think
it's against it, if I had to guess. And he also brought me a shirt and a bunch of other
items from, he's got a line of stuff called Puffingtons, and those include golf-related
items like golf balls and golf tees that double as a little stash holder and a pipe.
Yeah, it's a pretty sweet operation that guy's got going.
And my guests all brought a ton of stuff, too.
I'm glad you guys made great name tags,
because whoever wins today is going to walk out of here
with a lot of stuff,
and I hope you're not taking the train or something
because you're just going to look homeless.
Please join me in welcoming three of my favorite guests.
Give it up for Chris Cubis, Jeff Tate, and Shooter Jennings. Thank you.
Thank you.
All very polite.
Also, having to work out where they're going to put their drinks.
I'm sorry we don't have any tables for you guys.
I'm going to put mine in my belly.
That's smart.
Just finish it first.
That's Chris Cubis, everybody.
It's his 50th appearance on the show.
I've been on slightly less than Jeff, I think, but that's about it.
I'm doing pretty good.
All right.
Let's talk to Jeff when it's his turn.
Don't drag him into it yet, Chris.
We're interviewing you right now.
How many times have you been on At Midnight now?
Twice now. Twice. Twice, yeah. Excellent been on At Midnight now? Twice now.
Twice.
Twice, yeah.
Excellent.
Did you win?
50-50.
Won one, lost one.
That's a better average than I'm having.
I've been on 19 times, and I've only won eight, I think.
I feel like I take that record.
That's a good record.
Yeah, I don't mind it, because I've never come in third place.
Although now people, I just got
some dude out front who's like,
dude, I love you on that midnight. That's great. He's like,
Ron Funches.
I don't look anything
like Ron Funches. Come on, man.
If you're going to be fucking racist, call him Reggie Watts.
At least
make your racism
believable. You know what I mean?
Hang on.
You're not Reggie Watts.
Just try to be slightly accurate.
This dude ain't Reggie Watts.
That's what he gets a lot of times.
Three years I thought he was Reggie Watts.
All right.
That's Jeff Tate, everybody.
Also his 50th appearance on the show Is that true?
I don't think so
Doesn't say it anywhere on this piece of paper
I have never lost on At Midnight
Because you've never been on it
I've never been on it, no
That's how you keep your record spotless
Pristine
Yeah, just stay home
But we'll try to get you on there at some point I think you should be on there for sure keep your record spotless. Pristine. Yeah, just stay home. But
we'll try to get you on there at some point.
I think you should be on there for sure.
I think you'd be great at it. I mean, you won't
be Chris Cubis great at it,
but I think you'll do pretty
good. I can do okay.
Alright. Yeah.
I'm sitting here trying to think of who I could
confuse you for, but you...
Why do you just all look alike?
I can't tell you apart from, like, other than Shooter.
Who?
Tyler?
Tyler Labine, that's right.
He is a Tyler Labine lookalike.
I don't...
Who the fuck is Tyler Labine?
I don't know who that is.
He was on Reaper, and now he's got a show called Ghost...
Best Man Down.
Yeah, Best Man Down.
He was in that movie.
He's the guy that died in that movie.
This guy is a little too...
You might get raped by a Tyler Labine fan.
This guy's way into Tyler Labine.
Oh, I can't wait to see his Tyler Labine name tag
that he made for the night show.
Nope.
That guy right there?
Yeah.
Wouldn't be right.
I don't get it, but all right.
I'm saying... You're saying you could fight him off?
No, I think he's pretty good looking.
Well, have you met this guy's girlfriend?
I'll just fuck that guy to call his bluff.
Teach him a lesson about making jokes.
Here's what I got for the prize bag.
I got both of them.
Oh, I didn't ask you yet about the prize bag.
Because we have to say hello to, second time on the show,
yeah, music legend Shooter Jennings is here, you guys.
Hello.
Star of Walk the Line,
the motion picture.
Yeah, yeah, long way from home.
And it looks like he's going to be
talking into his drink
more than his microphone today.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You played that song Long Way From Home in And it looks like he's going to be talking into his drink more than his microphone today. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You played that song
Long Way From Home
in that movie, right?
I did, I did.
So good.
See, you knew all that shit.
I know one thing.
And that one thing I know
is I'm going to fuck
that dude later.
We're going to have
a Tyler Labine-loving,
Shooter Jennings-loving
human centipede going on
after the...
You guys, it's a love fest.
There is no love in Human Centipede.
That is not a make love situation.
Yeah.
What's a good movie with a three-way with men in it?
Catch and Release.
What?
Catch and Release?
No.
That was a Jennifer Garner vehicle.
Okay, yeah, you're right.
There's only two dudes in Jennifer Garner.
Did they run a train on Jennifer Garner in that movie?
No, I don't know.
No, that's in 13 going on 30.
There's a guy over here Instructing me where to put all the shit
So he can actually see the guests
I don't blame him
I'd do the same thing
Let's go through everybody
And find out what you brought for the prize bag
But we'll start with Jeff
Because he's so anxious to tell us
Mostly It's just difficult with these hands and find out what you brought for the prize bag. But we'll start with Jeff because he's so anxious to tell us.
Mostly.
It's just difficult with these hands.
You just want to get rid of this stuff.
Oh, you take the beer.
All right.
I have both my albums,
Just Another Clown and I Got Potential.
Right?
And I have a novelization of Ocean's Eleven.
I'm dying to know how they start off.
They started off by saying,
parole board hearing,
this guy looks like George Clooney.
Oh, I found out today that Jeff,
when he reads a book,
just automatically imagines that the main character is just Jeff.
So when he reads Jack Reacher, he's like, oh, what does Jack Reacher look like?
He's a guy with a shitty gray beard and fucking gray chucks.
That's true.
That's why when people are like, aren't you mad it was Tom Cruise?
No, Tom Cruise is like a really good looking version of me.
Chapter one.
New Jersey.
There was nowhere to go but up for inmate number 7736648367.
Oh, the guy's attention to detail is fantastic.
It's going to be a great read.
That's one of those all time great opening sentences to a novel. We were
somewhere near Barstow on the edge of the
desert when the drugs began
to take hold, right?
There was nowhere to go up but up
for inmate number, every
number that has ever been thought of
in a row. Maybe you should let
Shooter hold your beer for the rest of the show.
What did you bring, Chris?
I brought some wonderful vinyl.
I got the soundtrack to True Grit, the John Wayne True Grit.
I got the soundtrack to Barry Lyndon.
I've never seen Barry Lyndon.
I've got the soundtrack to Beverly Hills Cop.
No.
This one.
Pretty good.
This one.
And now here's the theme from Fletch.
Good old Harold Faltenmeier.
No, Fletch goes like this.
Good old Harold Fultemeier.
No, Fletch goes like this.
I forgot, because when you watch Fletch,
you pretend you're the composer.
Pass that down.
I also brought... Apparently...
Apparently Burt Reynolds made an album at some point
called Ask Me What I Am.
I have never listened to it, but I'm assuming the song She's Taken a Gentle Lover will set everyone in the mood for tonight.
So enjoy that.
I'll sign it.
That is awesome.
I'll sign it.
My wife will steal that.
And I'll take it down.
And I brought a VHS to teach you how to master the nunchucks.
So take that. And I'll take it to him. And I brought a VHS to teach you how to master the nunchucks. So take that.
Yeah.
He.
Which I've tried.
I would watch that and try nunchucks.
Like, I would legitimately try.
When I was a kid, I bought a book called Advanced Karate.
Yeah.
I didn't buy beginner's karate.
I just went straight to advanced karate.
And then I was like, I'm going to be Bruce Lee.
You can't learn a jump kick in four pictures.
Doesn't work.
You seem kind of empty handed, Shooter.
What'd you bring for the bag?
Oh, there it is.
Yeah.
All right, cool.
It's my second time.
Remember? Yeah. It's a bunch of merch shit. Okay. There it is. Yeah, come on, man. All right, cool. It's my second time, remember?
Yeah.
It's a bunch of merch shit.
Okay.
There's koozies, T-shirts, and a vinyl of Waylon Jennings vinyl from a 1955 recording.
His first recording that we put out in April.
And that's all going on this table.
So whoever wins, yeah, put it down there with those things.
With all that crap.
That's great stuff, man.
There were three koozies, but I don't know what happened to the other one.
Oh, there's one on Jeff's beer.
I'm pretty certain of it.
That's where it happened.
Hey, Tyler Labine guy.
Giving away some of these shirts because the winner of the prize bag doesn't need
I guess it'd be fun
to put the whole family in
Shooter Jennings shirts
give the kids
Shooter Jennings shirts and Shooter Jennings koozies
and then
just go out in public and be proud
alright
well all of that stuff is going to be won
by somebody.
Oh, and you guys didn't bring that bag I asked you to bring out.
I guess I didn't.
You were probably backstage when I was asking for it.
Do you know that bag full of all the movie stuff, Chris?
Oh, yeah.
You want me to go get it? Would you mind grabbing it?
Yeah, yeah, because this guy brought a bag full of stuff,
and I want to give away a lot of it.
And I left it backstage.
It's right next to my drink if you want to grab that.
I believe there's a Budweiser nearby, too, Chris. And a Jack it backstage. It's right next to my drink if you want to grab that. I believe there's a Budweiser nearby too, Chris.
And a Jack and Coke.
Could you bring the bar back?
Bring the bar up here?
I like that he just got up and went to go get that stuff.
That's nice.
But I miss him.
I miss him too.
Oh, that was fast.
Holy shit.
They met me halfway.
That's my sweatshirt.
And also, I was only getting up to put my drink down, and you just sent me to get them.
Unless you want me to add it to the gift bag, I'll give away my Tulsa sweatshirt.
No, that's all right.
You might need that later.
It's probably going to cool down tonight.
I'm sweating profusely.
Yeah, yeah.
This guy that brought all this movie stuff, it's incredible.
There's lots of Fantastic Four shirts that are perfect for, like, washing a car.
A Fantastic Four, what does this do?
A water bottle.
The Fantastic Four.
Because, you know, Johnny Torch needs to hydrate.
Oh, thank you
Okay
We got a
I like that these, all of the
Phone cases are for the older version
Of the iPhone, so
Probably not going to come in handy
Yeah, Katy Perry, the movie
I'm pretty sure it wasn't called
Katy Perry Perry the movie
That's what it says on there
Oh fuck me was it really
No it was called
I assumed she wasn't that lazy
Like
No it's called
It's called part of me
Was what the movie was called
But it says the movie on the
On the phone case
Just cause you know
If you're on your phone
You don't want to confuse anybody
This is like a blow up Banana shaped thing Or oh I guess on the phone case just because, you know, if you're on your phone, you don't want to confuse anybody.
This is like a blow-up banana-shaped thing,
or, oh, I guess
it's a beach ball,
but it says
While We're Young
that Ben Stiller,
Naomi Watts movie.
Also, Kooz,
whoever walks away
at the prize bag tonight
is going to be Koozie crazy
because I also got
a Southpaw Koozie.
Like, yeah, a couple of Southpaw koozies.
And there's so much stuff in here.
I just want to hit the highlights.
What is this?
A Mission Impossible.
Oh, I'm hanging on to that.
Hang on.
I didn't see the Mission Impossible thing.
A bunch of these weird things that, like,
depending on what angle you look at it,
a sinister face appears.
Is it sinister or Jesus?
Is that what that is?
Or shooter.
It looks a little like shooter on a bad night.
Simon Pegg on a stick.
A creepy Annabelle mask.
Like, it's insane how much movie swag this guy hooked us up with.
And a Paul Blart 2 mall cop...
Fanny pack?
I forgot the words fanny pack.
Could I have the fanny pack for my dad?
Yeah, you can.
Oh yeah, his dad loves Paul Blart.
Paul Blart, Maul Blart.
So that's not going in the
prize bag.
He's a huge fan of it, and he's
not. He needs a fanny pack. Can I ask you
a question? We're about the same age. Does your
dad love Down Periscope
with Kelsey Grammar?
Holy shit, you love Down Periscope?
Is my dad here?
My dad's never seen it, but I...
He might.
I bet he would a lot.
It's a Paul Blart lateral move.
Well, anyway, this guy...
What's your name?
Scott.
Scott.
It's like Scott listens to the show and goes,
you know, my favorite part is when he just describes prizes for an hour.
So I'm going to make sure he's got plenty of shit to describe.
And so I'm not going to even describe all of it. There's so much more.
And it's all going to be somebody's tonight.
Chris, have you been to the movies lately?
What did I see?
I saw Cop Car with Kevin Bacon.
Yeah.
It's pretty good.
Have you seen it?
Yeah.
I've heard mixed things.
I liked it.
It was nice.
It was nice to see two cute little white boys be that afraid of the police.
It felt good.
It was nice. It felt good. From my, like, it was nice.
I did like it, though.
Honestly, I thought it was pretty good.
It sounds like science fiction.
I watched Maniac Cop.
I watched all three Maniac Cops recently,
and I was like, this body count isn't even close
to just the police.
Like, they're not even the same.
And then I saw Redeemer with Marco Zaror, who you and I interrupted the rundown with.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, he was a rock stunt double, and now he makes, like, Chilean kung fu movies.
And he's great.
He's really good.
He's there, yeah.
If you like kung fu movies, watch this movie.
It's fucking awesome.
What's it called again?
Redeemer. Redeemer. Yeah, it's really good. He's there, yeah. If you like kung fu movies, watch this movie. It's fucking awesome. What's it called again? Redeemer.
Redeemer.
Yeah, it's really good.
Cool.
It's like a Chilean, low-budget kind of John Wick, but it's really good.
It's not John Wick good.
Let's not fucking get ahead of ourselves.
He doesn't shoot anybody in the face at close range.
He shoots a lot of people in the face at close range.
It's just not as cool.
Even though it's a kung fu movie?
Yeah, because it's shooting and then a ten-minute fight sequence
and then more shooting in the face.
It's good.
Okay.
John Wick did a lot of shoot-punching.
Yeah, he'd punch you with a gun
while shooting you with it.
Pow, pow.
Yeah.
Well, that's what I love about it.
I just hope in John Wick 2
that it doesn't start with
he's got a new dog.
I don't need to go through
that part of it again.
He's John Wick.
That's reason enough
to kill people.
That's what suckered me
into the first one,
if I'm being honest with you.
I'm not a big Keanu Reeves fan,
but then I was like,
oh, I like dogs.
And then they fucked up that dog.
I was like,
I would kill everybody
if I could.
Right?
And then he did it for me.
I was like,
you're my favorite.
I think John Wick 2
should just be like Memento
where he wakes up
and remembers
someone killed his dog.
And then just
reverse engineers
another murder spree
because he's so sad
about the dog.
I hope he has a tattoo
of that dog
on his body too.
Just like Memento.
By the way,
he didn't give a fuck
about his wife.
His wife died like a day before the dog did.
Didn't give a shit.
Wasn't killing anybody.
But they didn't kill her, though, did they?
They just fucked up his car and killed his dog.
Oh, yeah, maybe John Wick 2, he goes and fights, like, cancer or whatever.
Or, like, the doctors at the hospital that couldn't do it.
He just, like, stalks them.
You should have saved my wife.
Shoot punch.
John Wick stage two.
I've never heard that many people applaud cancer before.
Well, they know John Wick's going to win,
and Dennis Leary will finally be wrong.
Yeah, by the time you walk out of that movie,
cancer is going to be cured.
It's going to be obliterated.
I can't wait.
Have you been to the movies, Jeff?
Yes, I saw The Man from UNCLE yesterday.
People that are going to see it love it.
Trouble is, all those people that aren't going
are really dragging its numbers down.
It's got cool clothes and songs, man.
Yeah, I wish that was all I looked for in the movies.
Clue, clue, clue, clue, clue, cool.
Cool clothes.
I can't even say it.
That's how badly even say it. That's why.
That's how badly I want it.
There's like double crosses and triple crosses and quadruple crosses.
Yeah.
And who gives a shit crosses.
And didn't we just see this in Rogue Nation crosses?
It's a little too similar to Rogue Nation, but without the action.
Right.
It's more like just the talking parts of Rogue Nation.
I think my favorite part about it was I saw it at the draft house,
and they were showing clips from the original TV show beforehand,
just constantly for like 20 minutes, and those were fucking great.
Oh, okay.
So fun.
So you're recommending the pre-show more than the movie.
Equal.
And also, they do the same
in the car chase, they do the same thing
they did in Rogue Nation where two cars are spinning
right next to each other. It's the same exact
fucking stunt. It's crazy.
I mean, it's just bad timing for Uncle
that that happened.
I think I was too stoned when we saw Rogue Nation
that I don't remember
that part that you're talking about.
Too stoned?
It's an unlikely state that I don't remember that part that you're talking about. Two stoned? Yeah, I know.
It's an unlikely state of mind for most of these people and everyone on stage,
but I think I might have been too high for Rogue Nation.
All right.
Shooter, I know you're busy touring and stuff.
Where are you playing tonight?
You have a show here in Dallas tonight.
Yeah, I do.
What's it called?
Monkey something?
Gas Monkey.
Gas Monkey.
Yeah, Gas Monkey.
If you hadn't said that,
I was not going to remember.
I was like...
Yeah, I mean,
you must play a lot of venues
with just random words,
you know, like...
Yes.
Oh, I'm going to be at Hat Ball tonight.
Oh, Hat Ball was in St. Louis, right?
The Wizard Place. Yeah. And yeah, so come out at Hat Ball tonight. Oh, Hat Ball was in St. Louis, right? The Wizard Place.
Yeah.
And yeah, so come out to Gas Monkey tonight if it's not sold out.
The Quaker City Nighthawks are opening the show.
They're a cool band, too.
Yeah, that sounds fun.
Do you guys have plans?
Yeah.
Come check it out.
Or to plug a friend of mine, if you can, go see Jim Norton at the House of Blues.
Yeah.
Yeah. Will you cover Br Norton at the House of Blues. Yeah. No. Yeah.
Will you cover Brass Monkey
at the Gas Monkey?
Yeah, a Gas Monkey
is half a 40 ounce
and then half gasoline.
You ever had a Brass Monkey
that's 40 in orange juice?
Wait, no, I thought
I didn't make that up.
Did that not make it to Texas?
A 40 in orange juice?
Hold on, does anyone know
what a Br brass monkey is?
The drink.
Hey, the guy.
That guy definitely knows.
Deadpool knows a lot.
He's very excited about it.
He's wearing.
He's dressed like he's on the Deadpool softball team.
No, you don't.
He said, I back clean up. And Jeff is like, no, you don't He said I back clean up
And Jeff was like
No you don't
Totally shut him down
So if you're thinking
About talking back
Jeff's pretty good
With that stuff
What about you Shooter?
Have you seen a movie lately?
I saw Trainwreck
In the theaters
I also saw Inside Out
With my kids
Those are
Last two
Scratch that Reverse it You should see saw Inside Out with my kids. Those are last two. Scratch that, reverse it.
You should see
Trainwreck with the kids.
Yes.
And Inside Out
with your pants off.
Because I feel
a lot of emotions
when I have my pants off.
And sadness
tries to dominate.
But you'd recommend both of those films, yes?
I would.
They're both terrific. Trainwreck was great.
Yeah, Trainwreck's very funny.
And Inside Out is another one of those Pixar things that makes you cry like a child.
Yeah, sweet Jesus.
Like,
I don't want to spoil
that fucking monkey
or not monkey,
the elephant rocket
elephant guy.
Yeah.
That bingo.
Bing Bong.
Bing Bong.
Jesus.
Also, Bing Bong
is kind of like
if Jeff Tate
was a cartoon character,
but
you're a big Bing Bong-y.
No, that sounds good.
I haven't seen the movie But this bing bong fella
Sounds handsome
He's pretty fucked up
Because like
Not unlike clowns
He's supposed to be
Entertaining to children
But he's also
Frightening looking
In a way
Holy shit
That is me
I try to be My brother and I Went to the mall today In a way. Holy shit. That is me.
I try to be... My brother and I went to the mall today
because it's 167 degrees outside.
And there was like...
Yeah, nobody here is aware of that.
You don't need to rub it in.
There was like these two parents
walking with their kid right at me
and the kid just started backing up
and like pulling.
And then I turned around and then the kid started walking fine and then I looked back at the kid the kid just started backing up and like pulling and then I turned around
and then the kid started walking fine and then I looked
back at the kid and the kid started backing up and being
all scared and I felt
terrible. I felt like the man
without a face. Like I could teach you stuff.
Don't be scared of me. I'm not scary.
I just look scary. I could teach you stuff.
Half a face. Look at the half
a face that's good.
I bet you he was molested by a mall Santa.
Hey, if that's true,
then Paul Blart needs to be a real fucking cop.
Paul Blart mall cop, you got that shit going on in your mall, Paul Blart?
Fix it.
Mall cop.
There should be a Paul Blart mall cop SVU.
I'm like Jeff Garland Just let me keep talking
I'll get to it
Yeah they could leave out
The mall cop part
Just Paul Blart SVU
I would watch the shit
Out of that
Which was kind of like
Observe and Report
The Seth Rogen movie
Where he was a mall cop
Was pretty filthy
And had a lot of
Sex crimes in it
Dude running around Showing his dick Dick to everybody Who you also kind of as a mall cop was pretty filthy and had a lot of sex crimes in it.
Dude running around showing his dick to everybody.
Who you also kind of look like, Jeff.
But anyway...
Jeff and I have a message to everybody.
If it doesn't look like it's your cup of tea,
give it a try anyway.
The new film Grandma starring Lily Tomlin.
We saw it at a film festival recently
and it is terrific. Oh my god, it's
so good. It's so
fucking good. Yeah, I call her
the frontrunner for Best Actress Academy
Award. Really? Alright, just end it.
Just give it to her right now.
Just give it over. But what about
Meryl Streep has a supporting role
in Suffragette, but what about
Ricky and the Flash?
What is this guy?
I don't know.
We got a really chatty audience today.
You're saying audience like it's more than just this fucking guy.
I heard somebody over there said something.
Grandma is super great.
It's so good.
I want to get Lily Tomlin on Getting Doug with High.
Yeah.
She says she's on record as a weed smoker.
Yeah, for sure.
And we saw two movies with Sam Elliott at the Traverse City thing,
and both those movies smoke weed, just casually.
They just smoke weed.
What was the other one?
Wait, he might not have smoked weed in the other one.
Digging with Fire?
But they just casually
smoke pot?
Yeah, yeah, he did.
They don't even say it.
It's not even like a,
let's smoke pot.
They're just smoking pot.
They're just doing it, yeah.
It's like life.
Yeah.
I love that.
They've managed to make movies
where there's weed in them
where the movies aren't
just about weed.
That's been going on for a long time, Jeff.
Poltergeist
and 9 to 5, do you think those are about weed?
Eyes wide shut.
I don't
remember those. I never saw those movies.
Jurassic Park.
Poltergeist seems scary And I've never been a real
Like regular day job
Kind of fella
So 9 to 5
Just didn't seem like
My bag either
Yeah there's a great scene
Where Dolly Parton
And Lily Tomlin
And Jane Fonda
Are all just sitting around
Laughing their asses off
Smoking weed
And they treated it
Very casually
And that was
That movie was
From the 1950s.
The only reason I know that's not true is there's women with jobs.
To be fair.
They're all doing, like, madmen 50s jobs, though. They're all, like, secretaries and shit. They're not doing like madmen 50s jobs, though.
They're all like secretaries and shit.
They're not the boss.
They're not sexually harassing fucking, what's his name?
I almost said Gavin McCloud.
Dabney Coleman, thank you.
Dabney Coleman, thank you.
Don't get in the mood for yelling out answers.
Drexel.
Just today, right next door at the Angelica, I saw American Ultra.
Is that good?
I enjoyed it.
I can't tell if it's terrible or good.
It's very violent and lots of fun action. That people get fucked up more as much in this version of a Home Depot as they do in the Denzel Washington Equalizer.
Wow.
Oh, for real?
And any time people are getting fucked up with items that are just sitting around in a Home Depot, I enjoy that.
It's more than the Equalizer?
Maybe.
I don't know.
Equalizer was a lot.
Yeah.
American Ultra
has a pretty good body count.
I just, on Monday,
I watched Man on Fire
and the Equalizer
back to back.
Both great movies.
And I pretended as if
the Equalizer...
You were Denzel Washington?
Nope, nope.
I pretended as if
somehow Denzel
and Man on Fire
got, like, lived.
And then this is him
and the Equalizer.
Like, it's the same dude.
Like, it's a sequel.
That's a fun way
to watch that movie.
If you watch both of them
after Glory
you could do the same thing.
Yeah.
Somehow he lived.
He's real mad
from that whipping
and then he just is.
And he's 240 years old?
Yeah.
Somehow he lived.
Yeah, he's an immortal.
Has he played an immortal
in anything?
He's a Highlander.
Is he an immortal in Book of Eli or just a guy?
Was he in the Time on My Side movie?
Wasn't he a...
Oh, Deja Vu?
No, Fallen.
The Fallen.
Fallen.
He wasn't immortal, but he tried to kill a demon, and that's really hard to do.
It's close enough.
He tried to trick a demon by smoking a cigarette, teach that demon a lesson lesson but then the demon went in a cat and then people
were like why are you so scared of cats I'm like fucking
the end of fallen man and you can't remember
that there was a car chase in Mission Impossible
now's the part of the show where I say let the games
begin
gentlemen the name tags are spectacular is a part of the show where I say, let the games begin!
Gentlemen, the name tags are spectacular today, as
they always are here in Dallas.
That's your
full name is impressive.
Just go ahead and go pick whoever you want to play for
and grab the name
tag and bring it back to your seat.
And while you guys do that, we'll do this.
We'll be right back.
Got milk?
We're back.
Who are you playing for, Chris Cubis?
I'm a little mad that I picked this now
because she kind of shit talks you in a second here.
It says,
Shallot wants to be getting Doug with high.
And then in parentheses,
your mugs are overpriced,
so I had to make my own,
and it's in the shape of a mug.
And she made a mug that's worth $28.
Holy shit, are your mugs $28?
Yeah, they're way too expensive.
Okay, fair enough.
Never mind, I don't feel bad.
That's ridiculous.
Hey, Charlotte?
She's absolutely right about that.
Her name is Charlotte?
Charlotte. Oh, don't act like I should have known how to pronounce that. She's absolutely right about that And her name is Shallot?
Shallot Oh don't act like I should have known how to pronounce that
Sorry
Sorry we didn't get your weird name right
Thanks Shallot for coming
Jeff who are you playing for?
Gone Baby Jeff.
The guy's got my name, so it has...
How old are you?
30.
He's 30. It has not been easy.
Right.
Are you a comedian?
Not really.
Why are you interviewing the audience? No, I'm just trying to figure out why I became a comedian? Not really. Why are you interviewing the audience?
No, I'm just trying to figure out why I became a comedian.
For a long time, I thought it was my name,
but this guy probably works at a bank or something,
so I fucked up somewhere else.
Well, try to...
Jeff, try to figure out that half of a conversation
is not interesting on a podcast.
Half.
He doesn't have a microphone.
Jeff, I picked this because it's got my name
while you've got the same name as me.
Gone Baby Jeff.
Woo!
Good job. I want to see your's got my name on it. You've got the same name as me. Gone Baby Jeff. Good job.
I want to see your face superimposed on a baby.
This is Baby Jeff.
Why would I be the baby?
I'd be Casey Affleck because he's the main character.
Hold on.
Did they?
I read the book.
I wasn't the baby in the book.
I was the guy who found the baby.
And also Ed Harris.
Right?
I'll play multiple roles in the book.
I'm like Eddie Murphy in my own brain.
All right, Jeff picked the guy who just yelled,
hey, shooter, and then held up his name tag.
So that worked, I guess.
And it's Dumb and Duggar.
Dumb and Duggar, Adam Byers, right?
Yeah.
Good job, dude.
It's good.
It looks like Dumb and Dumber, but it's got Doug and Adam in it.
Yeah, it's got us in there.
Yep.
Yeah.
I think I'm Jim Carrey, and he's Jeff Daniels.
Yeah.
Because Jeff Daniels had longer hair in that.
And Jim Carrey has ears.
It looks like Mexican Adrian Brody.
All right, well, whoever it is, let's just get rid of it.
I'm tired of looking at it.
We got games to play.
We're going to start off...
We're going to start with how much did this shit make?
Yeah, and since I'm interrupting Johnny Mnemonic tomorrow
at 4.20 at the Alamo Drafthouse in Richardson, Texas,
we'll start with Jeff and then go to Chris and then Shooter.
And you have to tell me how much that movie made
without going over in millions
according to boxofficemojo.com.
Johnny Mnemonic starring Christopher Renieves.
Who?
Christopher Renieves.
That's's What?
I think it's
I mean Keanu
88
Keanu
Remieves
Johnny Mnemonic
Christopher Reeve
in Johnny Mnemonic
Oh no
So terrible
Yeah
He couldn't walk the line.
Long dead.
Nobody got hurt by that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Jeff, how much do you think Johnny Mnemonic made?
It was not a hit, necessarily.
People thought it was awful.
I've never seen it, so I'm excited to see it tomorrow on the big screen and talk shit the
whole time. 70 million.
70 million says Jeff Tate.
Now we go to Chris.
I'm going to say
I'm terrible at this game. I'm going to say
42 million.
Okay. Hang on a second here, Shooter.
I got to write down these brilliant guesses.
Just for the record, it was a Philip K. Dick story, too.
70.
70.
And Chris said 40?
42.
42, okay.
What do you think it made, Shooter,
keeping in mind that I mentioned that it was not a hit?
Two million.
Two million?
Wow.
He's probably going to be right because it made less than...
I wish it just made one million and you all went over.
But in fact, Shooter is our winner of this game because it made $19 million.
Wow.
That movie must be really awful if it only made $19 million.
It made $6 million on opening weekend.
What's that?
It's a Philip K. Dick story.
You know, wrote Blade Runner, Minority Report, and all that.
Same guy wrote the story to that, but they just screwed it up.
The book it was based on.
And Total Recall.
Yeah, the story.
Yeah, yeah.
Philip K. Dick.
Philip K. Dick, yeah.
Oh, okay.
Well, they seem to screw up all of his stories.
Well, it was unfortunately right on the corner of before, like, the Internet and cell phones happened.
It was unfortunately right on the corner before the internet and cell phones happened.
So this movie came out, and two years later, everyone had the internet, and it made no sense.
It was outdated immediately.
He literally had to carry data like a flash drive because there was no way to send it in this world.
I can't wait to see this movie.
It's in his head, though.
They stored it in his head, so he can't get it out. But he's a courier.
It's a story of a man and his flash drive.
But Blade Runner was kind of a flop when it opened,
and then it turned out to be a cult classic,
but not the case with Johnny.
Blade Runner is my favorite movie of all time.
Blade Runner is, but this movie.
Hold on.
Some dummy next to me just said it's a top 30 movie?
Domestic, the year it came out.
How do
you know that?
Did it come in their fucking Johnny
Mnemonic fan club letter that week?
Oh.
Wow.
Only making $19 million, it came in
the top 30. Oh, Blade Runner.
Oh, Blade Runner. Oh, yeah, that makes
much more sense.
Harrison Ford was coming off of Star Wars, and Indiana Jones hadn't happened yet.
Oh, just shut up.
All right, we're done.
Now you're just saying shit that's wrong from the audience.
Indiana Jones is 81, Blade Runner is 82.
You're right.
Hey.
He's right.
I like this guy.
I should have picked his thing.
Sorry, Adam.
Is Johnny Mnemonic, it sounds like that show, Chuck?
I kind of like that show.
This isn't Douglas TV.
But Henry Rollins is terrible in it.
You will see.
In which one?
Chuck or Johnny Mnemonic?
In everything he's ever done.
Did you not see Johnny Mnemonic either?
I've never seen Johnny Mnemonic.
No, I haven't seen it.
I saw it in theaters.
I know Ice-T's in it, right?
I contributed to the 19 million.
So some of that, like seven of those dollars was you.
Yes.
Seven.
That's funny.
It was then, I guess.
All right.
I will.
That's a long time ago.
I thought Johnny Numata was like a fun name.
I didn't realize it was just about a guy who remembered shit for real.
Well, he has data in his head, and he has to carry it from one place to another.
But he can't get it out.
Only the person who gets to can.
And then they'll kill him after he does it.
Oh, man.
I can't wait to see this movie.
So this guy is right, but he also needs to be told, I don't want to hear from you ever again.
He's going to stop talking for the rest of his life.
Because you're right.
Raiders did come out before Blade Runner,
but my foggy thinking when I was an extra in Blade Runner.
He was in Blade Runner.
Yeah, this is how I always say it.
When I was about to say it to say got interrupted by facts.
When I was on the set of Blade Runner,
he was coming off of
Star Wars. Raiders hadn't come out yet
when he was making Blade Runner.
I mean, there's no reason for you to know that.
I'm just saying why I'm so stupid.
But I was going to
finish that with, ridley scott
was coming off of alien so everybody that went to blade runner i can't blame them for being
disappointed by for a movie that they thought was going to be like star wars or alien because it's
not like either of those it's its own special thing that took many years for people to catch
on to and many different versions, too.
Did you hear that Anthony Bourdain is opening a Blade Runner-themed food,
like an area that looks like where all the noodle shop and all that shit was in Blade Runner?
He's literally replicating that, I believe, in New York.
I could be wrong about that. That could be in Los Angeles.
All right.
You need to shut up, but saying replicant was pretty funny.
I'm not going to lie.
I said replicate.
No, no.
Not you.
That guy said replicate.
Oh, right.
Yeah, that was.
And I'm even more.
It was pretty funny.
Now shut up.
I'm even more wrong because Empire Strikes Back had already come out also.
And in between, this was sad, in between Star Wars and Empire Strikes Back, he was in like
a bunch of shitty movies.
He was in Heroes, Force 10 from Navarone.
Apocalypse Now, I'll give him that one.
That was a good one.
He played Colonel Lucas in Apocalypse Now.
That's funny.
And then Hanover Street.
Did anybody see Hanover Street?
No.
And Frisco Kid with Gene Wilder.
I actually liked that movie.
When was Frantic?
Frantic was...
84.
Later.
Awesome movie.
Yeah.
Yeah, we played Harrison Ford in Last Man's Tent just the other night,
and nobody mentioned Clear and Present Danger or Patriot Games.
Who cares?
Why would they?
Just somebody said, why would they?
Because it's Harrison Ford movies, and he was in both of those.
That's why.
This audience is saying some weird shit.
All right, let's move on to the next game.
But Shooter gets to go first in this one, because he won that last one.
Woo!
And we don't play this game often enough enough because the guests are usually confused by it.
So I'm going to try a round of build a title.
Yeah!
Oh.
We'll be starting with Shooter and then going to Jeff and then going to, I mean, Chris and then Jeff.
We'll go that way.
And Shooter, we have to build titles.
Do you know this one?
Yeah, remind me.
I'll remind you.
We're going to start with the title because it came in at a whopping 7% on Rotten Tomatoes.
Hitman, Agent 47.
Sounds like Jeff Tate's kind of movie to me.
And so you need to add to that title with another title of another film.
So you need a movie that ends in the word Hitman or begins with the word 7 or 47 or ends in the word hit.
Can I do it?
Am I ready?
Are you ready?
Yeah
Can I say
Hitman Agent 47
But the V in seven is a seven
You could say it
You know what?
I'm going to let that slide
Because you haven't played the game before
But normally that would not fly
Because you haven't added anything
I did
We're building a title.
You did put a seven in the middle of it,
which I've never understood that either.
Yeah, well.
Why is a V turned on its side?
What the fuck?
That changes the whole thing.
All right.
It does.
But let's see what Jeff's got.
I thought it went to me.
I'm sorry, Chris.
Hitman, Agent 47.
Agent 47, years in Tibet.
Oh, nice.
Yes.
Nice.
All right, Jeff, you need something that begins with Tibet.
Tibet.
Or ends with Hitman.
Or just hit.
with Hitman or just hit?
The Big Hit.
Yes.
Big Hitman.
Agent 47 years
in Tibet. So now
Shooter needs a movie that ends in the word
big or begins
with Tibet. Can I say Little Big
Hitman?
You can because it's fun that you said it.
See, you're letting a lot slide with me.
But it doesn't qualify.
Okay, okay, all right.
But that was fun.
I did enjoy it.
I know.
I thought I couldn't do that.
I was going to say big.
Big but with a seven instead of an I?
Yes.
I'll take it.
I'll take it.
I was going to do that, but I thought I couldn't do that twice.
Thanks for backing me up.
All right, Chris needs something that ends with big or begins with Tibet.
So it's big hit.
What is it?
A big hit man aged 47, years into Better Off Dead.
Better Off Dead.
I like it.
All right, Jeff.
Big Hit Man, Agent 47, years years in Tibet, turn off dead.
Man walking.
Dead man walking.
I knew you were going to do that.
So, Shooter, you need something that ends in big
or begins with walking
and doesn't have a seven in it.
Oh, boy.
Do I have a timer?
You're going to give me another answer, aren't you?
No, I'm not going to give you another answer.
See, I was going to...
I was just going to point out
the last half of the word walking
is the word king.
Maybe that'll help.
Oh.
Can I do that?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, that's how it works.
But there's plenty of movies that begin... I mean, not plenty, but some movies begin with
Walking.
Okay.
Some movies begin with King.
King Ralph.
Yeah.
Okay.
Cool.
Yeah.
All right.
So back to you, Chris.
Big Hitman.
Big.
Hitman, age of 47 years into better off, Deadman, Walking Ralph.
Deadman, Ralph. 47 years and to better off dead man walking Ralph. Ralph.
Ralph.
And big.
Ooh, man.
Hold on.
Give me one second.
Okay.
Time's up.
Fuck.
They made a Ralph S. Mouse movie where he was riding, but that was the mouse in the motorcycle.
Fuck.
I know the character, not the name of the movie. Where you just ride, but that was the mouse and the motorcycle. Fuck. I know the character, not the name of the movie.
Big.
Fucking.
Go Big.
That's not a movie.
All right.
I'm done.
I'm out.
I got nothing.
Okay.
Jeff.
I got nothing.
Alpha Dog.
Yes.
Oh, motherfucker.
Alpha.
God damn.
Well played.
Alpha Dog or Alpha Ville.
Can you think of any movie shooter that began with dog?
I can.
So close to Doug.
Dog blank.
That doesn't help.
Chris is having a donut Dude there's bacon
And bananas on it
It's the best thing
I've ever seen in my life
That's crazy
Yeah peanut butter
Holy shit
Dogtown is a movie isn't it
What's the words of Dogtown
Dogtown
Full title You could Lords of Dogtown? Dogtown. Full title.
You could do it.
Dogtown.
Oh, I have to give the full...
Don't help him.
It's not the Lords of...
Oh, because there's the two movies.
There's Lords of Dogtown.
Yeah, there's more than one version of it.
There's Dogtown.
There's the doc version and the fictional.
Dude who liked to skate.
When I saw it, I enjoyed a Heath bar
And then later when I got home, I wrote about it in my ledger
Right
Did you see it in the 40s?
Jesus Christ
The 1940s?
I know the fucking movie, man
I just can't say the title.
That's all right.
All right, I lost.
I give up.
Jeff?
I don't know the rest of the Dogtown movie.
Well, do you have anything to add?
You win regardless.
Yeah, yeah, Dog Day Afternoon.
There you go.
There you go.
Goddamn.
Dogtown and Z-Boys.
Yeah. That's not fair. And then the Lords of Dogtown and Z-Boys. Yeah.
That's not fair.
And then the Lords of Dogtown was the other version.
Dogtown and Z-Boys on the side.
One's a doc, right?
Yeah, yeah.
Now I can't figure it.
Now I don't know which is which.
I think Dogtown and Z-Boys was the doc,
and Lords of Dogtown was the feature, fictional version.
Both pretty good, I think.
Both had a lot of skateboarding in pools.
Which I enjoy.
Watching.
All right, you guys.
Let's play Last Man Stanton.
Hey, verse.
Hey, yeah.
Hey, wife.
Can we get a drink?
What would you like?
I was just going to get a beer for him
and a Jack and Coke for me.
And a vodka Red Bull single tall.
You guys are already all finished with your drinks?
Yeah, I'm sweating like a maniac under this light.
Well, alcohol is probably not going to help.
Yeah, it's helping me enjoy it.
I need something to rinse down this donut.
Me and Shooter didn't get replacements earlier.
Yeah, see?
Oh, that's true.
Yeah, see?
We're ahead of you.
Okay, so beer for Jeff.
Any particular kind?
Budweiser, please.
Okay.
Jack and Coke for shooter.
Jack and Coke for shooter.
Thanks, Jeff.
And Chris Cubis wants a...
Single tall vodka Red Bull.
Thank you, my friend.
The perfect drink to accompany a donut.
I'm sick of having all these toes.
Man.
As usual, several people tweeted to me today that are in the audience that claim to have the best name for Last Man's Den,
a name that's never been used before and is a person with a lot of credits.
Don't just yell it.
I'll ask somebody specifically.
We're going to get a name.
You know, this one works, Shooter.
We're going to get a name and we're going to just name movies that that person was in
until we run out.
And I'm going to play along because I enjoy to play this one because I don't know ahead
of time what the name's going to be.
And we'll start with Jeff and go that way around.
Jeff, Chris, me, Shooter.
And where is, from Twitter,
OhThatRyan.
You're here today.
You made it in. You tweeted
to me at least once, maybe twice,
that you have the perfect name
for us to use today. Very
cocky. Last time I heard that,
the person followed it up with Danny Trejo.
Oh.
I'd actually murder that category.
I know a lot of Danny Trejo movies.
Yeah, most people do not.
He narrated a documentary called...
March of the Penguins?
Called Turned Out about prison rape.
That's the craziest thing I've ever heard.
That's 100% true.
Google it.
Is it in Spanish?
No, yeah, no.
No, it's very much English.
Guess who gets raped in prison?
Little white guys.
Not so much Mexicans.
It's rough.
And then he put his machete in his ass.
My favorite thing about the machete movies
is that some people say machete
and some say machete within the same film.
But what do you got for us?
Kathy Bates.
That's all right.
That is an interesting one.
And I like it because it probably won't last too long.
No, it won't.
Jeff Tate, name a movie that's got Kathy Bates in it.
Kathleen Bates.
Misery.
Misery, yes.
Coming to Broadway starring Bruce Willis
in the Kathy Bates role.
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Is it a musical?
Are they doing that?
No, no.
It's just going to be a play, but it's misery.
So you're going to get to see Bruce Willis get his leg fucked up on stage.
I can't wait.
Who's playing the...
Laurie Metcalf, I think, is playing Kathy Bates' role.
So Bruce Willis is finally in a play, but he doesn't ever have to get out of bed.
Spoiler!
Sorry.
Chris, what's a movie that's got Kathy Bates in it?
Oh, man, I'm taking a stab at this.
Oh, no, really?
Your first one out of the gates just to guess?
It's already rough.
She's in Primary Colors, right?
Sure she is.
Yeah!
Yeah!
right? Sure she is. Yeah.
I'm going to go with I think I have to say because
it's got a scene that's burnt into my brain
for the rest of my
life in a film called
About Schmidt.
You get to see her naked in a hot
tub.
And I'm sorry that I used the words get to.
It's forced upon you.
Shooter, can you think of any movies that have Kathy Bates in them?
Dolores Claiborne.
Yes.
She's a regular Stephen King regular.
Jeff, what do you got next?
Titanic.
Titanic, of course
She played unsinkable Molly Brown
Which is what I nickname most of my bowel movements
Chris do you have another one
We might run the table on this one.
She's been in a lot of movies, but a lot of supporting roles.
Oh, she was in...
Uh-huh.
I think...
Yeah.
Fuck, I'm just going to say it, but I'm probably wrong.
Try it.
What was the Melissa McCarthy movie?
Try it.
Just say it.
I'm trying to remember the name of it.
It's like a chick's name, and she's fat. Oh, okay. Tammy. Was she in Tammy? Was it. Just say it. I'm trying to remember the name of it. It's like a chick's name
and she's fat.
Oh, okay.
Was she in Tammy?
Was she in Tammy?
Yeah.
She showed when they go to the...
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Tammy.
All right.
I'll take it.
I haven't seen Tammy
because I was warned not to.
I don't think she was in it.
By reliable sources.
It's good.
Susan Sarandon's in Tammy.
I want to get her
on Getting Doug with High.
Were you confusing her with her? Kathy Bates and Susan Sarandon's in Tammy. I want to get her. Oh, maybe that's who I'm thinking of. Were you confusing her with her?
Kathy Bates and Susan Sarandon?
That's, I would think that would make both of them sad
that they got confused for each other.
But even though I'm not sure if she's in Tammy,
I'll take it.
I'm going to go with one that I'm sure she's in,
a motion picture called Fried Green Tomatoes.
That was mine.
That was your next one?
I should have said that first and done Dolores Claiborne last.
Right?
You've got to save the trickier ones.
It's stupid of me.
Well, I was afraid I would only say the other one,
and then I would have been looked at like that's the one I was watching.
Right.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
I had to say the cool one first.
So you think you're out?
Out of Kathy Bates movies? Well, I mean, I know I've seen her in a billion movies Yeah. I had to say the cool one first. So you think you're out? Out of Kathy Bates movies?
Well, I mean, I know I've seen her in a billion movies, but I have to.
She's done a lot of TV, too.
She had a series for a while, and she's American Horror Story.
Yeah, yeah.
Nothing?
Fuck.
This isn't the last game, so it's not too much on the line.
Because I think I could win this if I thought hard enough and I didn't feel so much pressure.
Yeah, try to think harder.
That light.
All right, I'm out.
It'd be sad if she had a small part and walked the line.
Yeah.
But she didn't.
She didn't.
I think that was Reese Witherspoon.
So.
Oh.
Oh.
Jeff, do you have another one?
Bull Durham. Oh. Oh. Oh. Jeff, do you have another one? Bull Durham.
Oh.
Wait.
Oh, you mean Susan Sarandon?
No, stop it with the Susan Sarandon jokes.
I was thinking of Susan Sarandon.
I'm very sorry.
No, I'm out.
I don't know any more Kathy Bates movies.
Okay, Chris.
I was going to say the fucking Late Night Wars movie, but that's a TV movie.
That's a, yeah, it's made for home box office.
So I'm going to say American Horror Story Coven and walk away defeated.
Oh, I'm the winner.
Did you mean Barbarians at the Gate?
Or was it Late Night Wars?
The Waterboy, of course.
Of course, The Waterboy, of course! Of course,
the Waterboy.
She's in the Waterboy
and Blindside,
two stupid
football movies?
Are they both stupid?
I haven't seen either of them.
What else did we miss?
Day of the Earth.
Day of the Earth
stood till.
Midnight in Paris.
She was Titanic
at Midnight in Paris.
What?
Midnight in Paris. Midnight in Paris. That's interesting. What?
Midnight in Paris.
That's interesting.
Usually Titanic.
We said that.
Misery, we said.
I'm closing the floor to yelling out dumb shit.
Turns out Kathy Bates
was really hard.
This lady over here
is just looking at her phone
yelling out movies that she was in.
That's not the spirit of it at all.
It's like, if you thought of one, yell it out.
But if you're looking at your phone, fuck off.
We named like seven Kathy Bates movies
and then the audience was like,
we know them and they named two that we already named.
Yeah.
That's what I'm saying.
Let's move on.
The family that
prays? Fuck that movie.
That sounds awful.
Put your phone away.
Alright, you guys.
How much time do we have?
Holy shit.
It's a tight one.
Use your microphone voices if you...
We didn't want them to hear it.
Oh, okay.
That's a good reason not to talk to the microphone.
You don't want the audience to hear it.
I want them to hear everything.
So who said Tammy?
Oh, I did,
which is probably wrong.
No, it's right.
They confirmed it.
They confirmed it.
So that means you won that game.
Hooray!
I did it.
I had to watch
that terrible movie,
but I did it.
That movie stinks.
Have you seen it?
It's fine.
Yeah, it's not good.
I bet that movie
would be super awesome
to watch with a Budweiser and a Jack and Coke.
And a vodka Red Bull single tall.
It's fine, but I just feel bad for Melissa McCarthy because she's so funny.
Yeah.
She's great.
She's fucking hilarious.
But still, the trailer for that movie was just like, look at this fat girl be fat.
Let her just be a person.
Don't feel too bad for her.
That's why Spy was awesome.
Spy was great.
Yeah, Spy is terrific. But don't feel too bad for her on Tammy because her husband be a person. Don't feel too bad for her. That's why Spy was awesome. Spy was great. Yeah, Spy is terrific.
But don't feel too bad for her on Tammy
because her husband directed that movie.
That's unfortunate.
Now I feel worse for her
because her husband's like,
get over here and be fat, bitch.
That's mean.
That's her husband.
She should be nice to her.
You don't...
I mean...
I think she's called upon to be fat
in every movie she's in
Which is unfortunate
Nobody's like
We want you to be thin
In this one
Hit the gym bitch
Yeah but the character
Listen that would be
That would be way meaner
If her husband was like
You should be in this movie
But you have to be like
Super thin
I wrote this movie
About a supermodel
And I want you to play the part
Right
So get to work
Also and blonde
Right They just do that like Yeah She gets to be in Ghostbusters Yeah and I want you to play the part. So get to work. Also and blonde.
Right?
They just do that like... Yeah.
She gets to be in Ghostbusters.
Yeah.
Lady Ghostbusters.
They make her play the fucking Stay Puft Marshmallow Man.
That's mean.
She's a nice, funny lady.
All right, so...
Ron Jeremy was in Ghostbusters.
What?
I think you're thinking of Slimer.
No, Ron Jeremy
was in Extra. Ron Jeremy played
Slimer in Ghostbusters.
He played Slimer.
He had a lot of hot dogs in his mouth.
His own hot dog.
Why would a ghost eat a bunch of hot dogs?
Leaving his goo all over people.
Why was to show off?
You're talking to the king of hot dogs over here.
Yeah, hot dogs are good, man.
And Gatorade.
Let's play Reverse Malton, you guys.
It's a new version of Leonard Malton game that people love to hate.
And we'll start with Chris.
And basically what's going to happen is I'm going to give Chris.
Wait, who said Tammy?
Yeah, you said Tammy.
I'm going to give you three movies to choose from.
And then once you pick a movie, you're going to tell me going to give you three movies to choose from. And
then once you pick a movie, you're going to tell me, after I tell you how many actors
are in it, you're going to tell me how many actors you think you can name. So audience,
no helping on any of this from now on. Even if it's on your phone or you're just smart.
Good, yes. Shut it down.
Chris, which one of these do you think you know more actors from?
Seven?
It was preloaded, you guys.
I don't know what we're going to talk about before the games happen, or during the games.
Three Amigos?
Seven, Three Amigos, or Ten?
Which one of those movies?
Ten, yes. Oh, never mind.
Which one of those do you know the most actors and actresses?
I'm going to say Seven.
Woo!
That is not a movie you should be like,
Oh, I love serial killers.
It's weird that guy has a box on his table.
It's your head in the box.
And Leonard lists a lot of names for this movie.
I'm sure.
I didn't realize it had so many people in it.
I don't know.
He lists 16 names.
Oh, shit.
I cannot name that many.
I'm going to say...
Yeah, how many out of 16 do you think you can name?
I'm going to say four.
Okay, that's a good opening bid.
Pretty strategic.
That's probably as many as I could name.
Jeff, what do you think?
Can you do more than four actors from S-E-7-E-N?
I mean, it caught on.
Leonard even spells it that way on the app.
So it's official.
From 1995, 127 minutes long.
Rated R.
Jeff, can you name more than four?
Are you going to challenge Chris?
I'm going to challenge Chris.
Okay, I can definitely do four.
I can't name more than four.
I think he's going to nail it.
Yeah, it's no order, right?
Yeah, any order.
Kevin Spacey, Morgan Freeman, Brad Pitt, Gwyneth Paltrow.
Yeah, those are the four.
Those are pretty much the four that anyone would think of.
Top four, right?
I can't name another person.
I don't know who the fat guy was.
You made a, you don't know who Sloth was?
I think it was Melissa McCarthy.
You've made a perfect.
Oh, man.
You're going to get some fucking Twitter comments.
I would never just go after her for being overweight out of the gate.
It was a callback to the earlier references.
The thing that I said before, for sure.
It's my fault.
I like her.
I love her.
She's great.
I've watched so much Gilmore Girls.
Jesus.
It's a great show.
Yeah.
Even though I don't know why she was called Suki.
That seems a little too exotic for her character.
But Richard Roundtree, the great R. Lee Ermey, John C. McGinley.
Lots of people were in this movie.
But you got the main four.
So that was a smart bid.
And Chris Cubis has one point, everybody.
And that means since Jeff challenged Chris, Shooter gets to pick the next movie and then
we'll go to Jeff.
So Shooter Jennings.
Who do you think you
which one of these movies do you think you know more actors
from? Ghostbusters
2
Groundhog
Day
or The Life Aquatic
with Steve Sizzou.
Audience
favorite.
Which one of those do you think you know the most people from?
Hold on.
Well, I mean, I'd have to say...
Ghostbusters 2.
Ghostbusters 2.
Groundhog Day.
I'd have to say Ghostbusters 2.
Life in Aquatic.
Because that's...
Okay, don't say why.
I mean, it's just easier to name, like...
Well, okay.
It's a theory.
Leonard lists 13 names.
How many of those do you think you could bang out if you needed to on the cash?
I wish I could know these actors' names because I could do more than...
While you're thinking about it, Jack and Coke.
Yeah, Budweiser, Vodka Red Bull.
Vodka Red Bull in a big glass
but a single version.
I'm still good.
I pace myself.
I've got to go to a Shooter Jennings show tonight.
Over at Space Monkey.
over at Space Monkey.
Heavy Monkey, that's right.
Shooter and I are just accidentally pacing ourselves.
We're trying to drink more. We're trying, yes.
We are.
Yeah.
I think that was done on purpose.
I really do.
Yeah, you have a show.
How many of the folks in Ghostbusters?
And also, you know, don't be afraid to bid low and let the bidding escalate.
I can definitely name six.
I'm trying to name for seven.
Really?
I can definitely name six.
You can name S-I-7-X?
Yeah.
I can name six.
You're saying six?
I'm saying six. I want to say seven. All right, Jeff. He can name six. You're saying six? I'm saying six.
I want to say seven.
All right, Jeff.
He's going six.
Ghostbusters 2.
I can go seven.
Yeah, I was thinking something like that might happen.
See, you know that guy's name, and I don't know his name.
You know that guy's name?
Yeah, I don't know that guy's name.
Chris.
I got to go name it.
He's got to say name it.
So nobody say yes or no to these it. He's gotta say name it. So nobody say
yes or no to
these names. We're gonna count. I'll count them off.
Alright. Jeff.
Seven names from Ghostbusters 2.
Harold Ramis, Dan
Aykroyd, Bill Murray,
Ernie
Hudson, Rick
Moranis, Sigourney Weaver,
and Peter McNichol. That's correct. Fuck. That'sney Weaver, and Peter McNichol.
That's correct.
That's exactly who it was.
Peter McNichol.
Damn name.
Nice work.
Yurik.
Who else?
Who else, Jeff?
William Atherton?
No, he was just in the first one.
Annie Potts?
Yeah, she was in it.
The Statue of Liberty.
Who was the dude that was up?
Remember he had the television show?
There was a fat guy who was at the movie, the book coming out.
Ben Stein was in it.
Oh, Ben Stein.
Yeah, yeah.
Ben Stein was in it.
Harris Ulin was the judge.
Philip Baker Hall had a part in it.
Oh, here's your drinks, guys.
Thank you.
Cheech Marin.
That's what you win.
I don't know why some of you are saying Cheech Marin. I could have said Ron Jeremy. He appears in it, I guess. Yeah, he. That's what you win. I don't know why some of the audience is saying Cheech Marin,
but yeah,
he appears in it, I guess.
Yeah, he's in Ghostbusters 2
and he's like,
we've got all the pussy.
We've got ghost pussy,
Slimer pussy,
Annie Potts pussy.
That was from
Dusk to Pussy.
Yeah, yeah.
Leonard says,
Chloe Webb has a funny unbilled cameo
as a guest on Bill Murray's cable TV show.
So good for her.
Yeah, she's really funny.
And that guy, whatever his name is too,
he's been in a million movies,
is on one of his shows.
Oh, that guy?
No, I mean,
and Bill Murray has the television show
and he has this crazy woman
That you're talking about
And the other person
Is this guy
Who's been in a million movies
I can't think of his name
And he has a book
Coming out that year
About the end of the world
And Bill Murray's like
Don't you think
Was it Kathy Bates
I don't think
He's listed here
The only other name
We didn't say
Is David Margulies
Who I think plays
Like the mayor
Or something
Yeah
No He was in That man has no dick Scene in the first movie name we didn't say is David Margulies who I think plays like the mayor or something. Yeah. No.
He was in the that man has no dick
scene in the first movie. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. With William Atherton.
Yeah. The man is no dick. We'll watch Ghostbusters
2 later. We'll figure out who that dude is. All right.
Yeah. I have a Vigo
painting. I can figure it out right now.
That would scare the shit out of me to see
a Vigo painting. It's printed on
nylon but it's life size. No. I don't have it hanging out. My wife didn't let me hang it up. As Bobby to see a Vigo pain. It's printed on nylon, but it's life-size.
I don't have it hanging out.
My wife hadn't let me hang it up yet.
As Bobby Brown says it, Vigo, master of Evo.
Too hot to handle, too cold to hold.
They call the Ghostbusters in the...
Yeah, I remember.
That's right.
I'm obsessed with finding this out now.
I had that soundtrack.
I absolutely had that soundtrack.
So for the Ghostbusters soundtrack,
they stole that Huey Lewis song
and Ghostbusters 2 theme song
they stole from the Fruity Pebbles rap.
Basically.
What?
My name is Barney Rubble and I'm here to say, yeah.
Yeah.
I love Fruity Pebbles in a major way.
Yeah, will you do that tonight?
Yep.
You all heard it.
He has to do it now.
Just put it right in the middle of gas monkey,
that funky monkey,
gas monkey, junkie,
shooter.
Are you named after that Wahlberg movie?
McGavin, actually.
Jeff, you know you like that movie.
I love Shooter, but did Shooter and Walk the Line come out the same year?
Maybe.
Yeah, that'd be weird if it did.
Not that weird.
Not really.
I can't find that actor that you're talking about.
Kevin Dunn.
Is that who it is?
Yeah, he's in a ton of shit.
He played the uncredited role of Milton Anglin.
That's him.
There he is.
See?
Yeah, yeah.
Who did that?
Well.
Okay.
Who came up with that?
Me.
Oh, God is listening to the show.
Of course God knows the answer
Of course, that cheater
Have you ever had God on?
He has not been on yet
Has he been on Getting Doug With High yet?
No, he hasn't been on it
My publicist can't get in touch with him for some reason
Listen, I saw him the last time I did Getting Doug With High
So maybe he's just around.
Yeah, me too, man.
Yeah.
Fuck.
All right,
we got a two-person tie.
And when Shooter
still has a chance
to get on the board,
who challenged who there?
I challenged Jeff.
Yeah, so Shooter
gets to pick again
between three movies,
and then we'll go to Jeff.
I mean, Chris, sorry.
And your three options
are It's a Mad, Mad,
Mad, Mad World
from 1963.
Not happening. The Great Race
from 65.
And
Rat Race
from 2001.
All three movies. All-star cast in a chase.
The whole movie is people running around, being stars and running around.
All right.
Which one of those do you know the most actors from?
It's actually a tie.
Really?
Yes, I know none from all three of them.
Well, strategically, that's probably not a good starting point.
Yeah, well.
Probably not a good thing to say to the other competitors.
How about The Great Race?
All right.
Because I know zero from that.
Okay, great.
Again, that's not really.
But he's got to say one.
You've got to say one.
But I don't know.
That's unfortunate for you.
You can't bid I can name zero names.
Yeah, but. Because then he can't bid I can name zero names. Yeah, but...
Because then he can't challenge you to name zero names.
I'd rather have a better movie.
Well, it's a classic that came up randomly.
How about The Chase?
We can't just change it to a movie you want.
It's a Chase movie.
All right, it's happening.
What? What's happening? We're going with The Chase. Okay, I can do this. Wait, The Chase movie. All right, it's happening. What?
What's happening?
We're going with The Chase.
Okay, I can do this.
Wait, The Chase?
Yeah.
The one I'm thinking of?
How many people can you name from the 1946 movie The Chase?
Oh, no.
Not that one.
That's not the one he meant, I'm pretty sure.
I'm pretty sure he meant the one from 1994.
And it has 8, 9, 10, 11, 12,
13, 14 names.
How many of the 14 can you name?
Which year are we talking about?
1994.
1, 2, 3, 4. 14 names.
Definitely have four.
I'm sad for you that you can name
even more than one or two names
from the chase. I can maybe do five.
I can maybe do five.
I have to think really hard about that.
All right.
Don't think too hard.
We're running out of time.
Okay, I can do four.
I can definitely do four.
I'm not going to win.
He says four, Chris.
I got to play it smart and go name it.
All right.
Name four people from the chase.
Charlie Sheen.
Yeah.
We're not going to say if they're right or wrong.
Just name four people.
Flea and Anthony Kiedis.
That's correct.
Holy shit.
Oh, I could have done more.
Holy shit.
Shooter really has a fondness for movies
with half of the chili peppers in them.
Oh, Chad couldn't make it?
He was too busy impersonating Will Ferrell.
Dave Navarro was too busy doing bumpers on K-Rock.
That's a fun reference for...
I was only trying to make Shooter laugh that time.
Oh, okay.
I make all you dudes laugh all the time,
but I wanted one from Shooter.
All right, we've got a three-way tie.
That means we're going into a tiebreaker.
Yeah!
This is a movie where you guys don't get to
get involved in selecting which one we go with.
I just picked one in advance, a movie with a big cast that I and many of the listeners of the show enjoy.
And who was left out of that one?
Jeff gets to start us off, and then we go to Chris.
And the motion picture is Scott Pilgrim vs. The World.
Leonard lists
9, 10, 11,
14 names.
How many of the 14 people
that he lists from Scott Pilgrim vs.
The World can
you name, Jeff?
Is head spinning? Four. He says four, Chris. world can you name Jeff? His head's spinning.
Four.
He says four, Chris.
Can you name more than four?
Nope.
I got to say name it because I can't.
Do you have a movie that you'd like us to switch it to?
I do.
I would like you to do Ocean's Eleven, please.
No, no, no, no.
Just do Ocean's Eleven.
That's fair.
You know that many Ocean's Eleven people.
I feel like the crowd's on my side, Doug.
I think this crowd wants to secede from the union.
I think we've got a real rogue nation on our hands.
You just have to...
You really can't name more than four people, Chris?
I'm going to say something.
This crowd is going to turn on me immediately.
I don't like that movie.
I know.
It's fine. It's fine.
I already had a donut with bacon on it.
I don't give a fuck what you people think.
You saw it though, right?
I did. I did enjoy it.
So if you're not enjoying a movie, you just shut down
and don't recognize anybody.
I've only seen it once when it came out in the theater.
I don't remember. I remember like three people in that seen it once when it came out in the theater. I don't remember.
I remember like three people in that movie.
Well, that puts Jeff in the catbird seat.
I could do four from Scott Pilgrim, and I could do nine from Ocean's Eleven. I was going to say, you've got to be able to do a lot of Ocean's Eleven, right?
In that case, we're switching to Ocean's Eleven.
Okay.
Okay.
Of course, we're going with the 1960 version.
Ah!
So, not surprisingly, Leonard lists 12 names.
Oh, man.
Really?
Ocean's 11 plus 1.
So do you think you could do more than nine, Chris?
I'm thinking.
Okay.
You're thinking and counting on your hand.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I kind of hope he tried to do more than nine because then Shooter's probably going to walk away with this thing.
There's a guy in the audience yelling 12
because he thinks he's got your brain.
I don't know who the fucking Chinese guy is.
I don't know who the fucking Chinese guy is.
Oh, uh... I don't know who the fucking Chinese guy is. Think into your microphone.
Fuck, I'm at nine.
Yeah, I can't do more than nine.
I can do nine, but I can't do more than nine.
So you're going to challenge him?
Yeah, I got to.
All right.
This is for the win.
If Jeff can name nine people from this movie.
Hold your applause.
I promise you we're going to say the same nine.
Don't tell him if he's right or wrong.
Mary Elizabeth Winstead.
Michael Cera.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Karen Culkin.
Those are the four from Scott Pilgrim.
Oh, wow.
That's balls out.
You show-offy piece
of shit.
Let's go. Nine names. Ocean's
Eleven. George Clooney.
Brad Pitt.
Matt Damon.
Elliot Gould.
Scott
Kahn. Casey Affleck.
Julia Roberts.
Andy Garcia. And Carl Reiner.
That's nine.
That was my nine.
Scott Kahn, Bernie Mac, and... Bernie fucking Mac!
Shabu Quinn.
Goddamn Chinese guy.
Shabu.
Shabu. Shabo. Shabo. I thought Shabu. You Goddamn Chinese guy. Shabu.
Shabu.
Shabo.
Shabo.
I thought Shabu.
You just got catfish.
Shabu Shabo.
Shabu.
That was a good one.
That means Jeff Tate's our winner today. Woo!
Where's that person you were playing for?
Where are they at in the audience?
Oh, right up front.
Come gather all this stuff.
Good luck getting it all home okay.
And take your name tag back.
And is there a shithead on the back of the dumb and dugger?
No?
Who's your shithead?
Okay.
And we got one on the back of yours.
Goody, goody.
Shallot remembered to
put a shithead on the back.
Shallot, Doug.
Ugh.
Ugh.
Turns out
it's kind of an obvious one, but
I'll say it.
Chris Cubis, what do you got to plug, buddy?
This comes out, this will be out like Tuesday
or something. Maybe tomorrow.
Maybe tomorrow, awesome. I will be at
the Oddblock Comedy Festival
in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada
next week, the 27th through the 30th.
I'm in
Oklahoma City
September 20th?
21st? Something like that?
It's on my website. Google it.
And if you're listening from Austin, come to The Sting.
First Wednesday of the month. Fun show.
Thank you.
Chris Cubis, everybody.
Jeff Tate, you usually bring out a little piece of
a little notepad with your plugs on it.
I don't see you doing that this time.
No, there's way too much, so I just say this.
Justanotherclown.com.
My Make the Rounds tour
starts a week from Tuesday in
Eugene, Oregon.
This guy's still collecting his prize bag shit.
Yeah, yeah. Congratulations, dude.
You want my
sweatshirt?
So September 1st,
Oregon,
all the way through January, sweatshirt. So September 1st, Oregon,
all the way through January,
me and my hilarious friend Emma Arnold are going all over the country.
Justanotherclown.com, buy my albums,
listen to my podcast.
It's a big
cheers fan over there.
Come see the show.
Classic trick.
Jesus.
He's taking everything, man.
Shooter, I bet you
have a lot of shows coming up, so what's
the website with all the tour dates?
Shooterjennings.com. Play in the Troubadour
on Wednesday, Los Angeles.
Los Angeles, yeah. Thanks, dude.
You're not going to be there because you're in Wichita?
Yeah. Shooter Jennings, yeah. Thanks, dude. You're not going to be there because you're in Wichita? Yeah.
Shooter Jennings, everybody.
Thank you, guys.
I love doing this.
Thanks, Doug.
Love seeing my friend Jeff.
Thanks again to Hyenas, all you nice folks for coming out.
The wait staff at Hyenas, be sure to tip them.
Yeah.
Chris Cubis, Jeff Tate, and Shooter Jennings, everybody.
I'll be at the Funny Bone in Richmond, Virginia on September 16th.
And as always,
AT&T is a shithead. And Doug's expensive mugs are a shithead.
And Doug's expensive mugs are a shithead.
Play the end theme song.
Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. He's eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky.
There's no room
in his heart for you
cause Doug
loves movies.