Doug Loves Movies - Will Forte, Bob Odenkirk, Scott Aukerman, and Chris Cubas Guest
Episode Date: December 10, 2013Doug welcomes Will Forte, Bob Odenkirk, Chris Cubas, and returning Leonard Maltin Game winner Scott Aukerman to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy... Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers screaming,
JVC key seats with 50 ad and popcorn kernels in his teeth.
There's still not one that he won't see,
because Doug loves movies.
Hey everybody, my name is Doug
and I love movies.
This is Doug Loves Movies.
That sounds like a bunch of people
that want to go on the Weezer Cruise.
Coming to you from the
UCB Theater in Los Angeles on Tuesday
December 10 to Ocean's 13.
As promised, I'll be
giving away a cabin on the Weezer cruise in February.
Let me see your name tags, you guys.
I've got to prejudge these name tags.
I knew there would be some good ones tonight.
And there are some that I've seen before, but they're very colorful.
And now I have a follow-up question for you.
Keep them up. keep them up keep them up
now everybody that's
holding up a name tag you have to swear to me
that you are
that you have a passport
and that you are over
21 and that you will
get yourself somehow
to Jacksonville, Florida for
the cruise.
Those are all important
things. I mean, I guess it's transferable. I'm just
going to take a name and an email from you
and then have the cruise people get in
touch with you. So you could work
something out where you give it to a friend or something
or give it as a gift or whatever you want to do.
As long as a Weezer fan
gets to come on this thing,
that's the important thing.
Okay, now you can put your name tags down.
None of you put them down when I said that, I don't think.
Also, if you're under 21, you could go on the cruise
if the other person that you're with is over 25.
I know.
You know, fucking nautical law
is crazy
it's crazy the shit that goes on out there
CineFamily's
doing a 24 hour telethon
I wish I could be there
you can go to cinefamily.org
for details but on December 14th
and 15th from 1pm to 1pm
they're gonna just do constant
fun movie related things
and you can
watch the stream somewhere
I'm not sure where but cinefamily.org
will have that information and guests are going
to include my Captain EO
co-star Angelica Houston
and Bruce Dern
and Mike Judge
for those three alone just to see them do Q&As
with the CineFamily crowd is going to be super fun.
So check that out.
I'll be, where am I going to be?
I'll be in Denver.
Now the corrections department is saying
that people did do crack in Layer Cake.
So ignore when the corrections department said
that they didn't do crack in layer cake.
I think the corrections department's on crack.
I'll be at the Irvine Improv doing stand-up for three nights, December 26th, 27th, and 28th.
Filling your holiday taint with laughter.
Orange County.
And then Sacramento Punchline, December 29th and 30th
let's look and see what's
going on in the prize bag you guys
in addition to I mean I can't believe there's more
prizes in addition to
the Weezer
cruise cabin
this is a sweater an ugly sweater
that I wore backstage
a few minutes ago to record
a stand up-up against cancer benefit is coming up.
And they said, wear this ugly sweater
and say something about it.
And I did.
So now I don't need it anymore
because it's just an ugly sweater.
So congratulations to...
I think they might have an ugly sweater night
on the Weezer cruise cruise if I'm not mistaken.
So wear that and come up to me
and creep me out.
And we got a copy of
Gateway, Doug. And we got another prize
that I was going to be
handed to me backstage
and then the show started.
So we'll hopefully get that out here.
But let's get my guests
out here. As you can get my guests out here.
As you can see, there's four seats because too many people said yes tonight.
And I couldn't say no to any of them.
Please welcome returning LMG, Leonard Maltin game winner, Scott Aukerman,
along with Chris Cubis, Will Forte, and Bob Odenkirk.
Thank you. Let me just get the mic.
Let me just get the mic.
I just got to pick it up.
Stop hitting it in your forehead.
Okay, you got it?
That was my head, yeah.
Hi, Doug.
My plastic head.
Hey, that's Scott Aukerman, everybody.
He's back.
Keep your beer in your mouth.
What's that? Or do you think I'm going to put it?
Put a beer away from my water.
All right.
My water is non-alcoholic, and that thing is trying to get you drunk.
Uh-huh.
You're a teetotaler now, by the way.
Do you have a big announcement?
Well, wherever much tea I have, I total it up.
Yep.
At the end of the day, if you're at one cup or above, you're a winner.
You just got to keep track of your tea.
That's all it is.
That's that premise.
You're right.
It's like, what's the total?
Four, six, whatever it is.
It doesn't matter.
It's just that I have the totals.
All right.
That's Bob Odenkirk, everybody.
totals.
Alright, that's Bob Odenkirk, everybody.
Speaking of tea,
I saw Doug salivating when he heard tea.
Because that was a euphemism for pot back in the 50s.
I get it. Doug was like, did I go through a time
machine to a great
jazz club?
Back then
you would have loved jazz
but secretly you would have hated
it but you would have pretended that's really
why you were there.
Because I want to hang with that crowd.
Is there anything you pretend to like right now?
Like Weezer or 311?
Paramore
also
yeah
I truly do like those bands
I know you do
they're super fun bands
and I'm always excited to go on
cruises with them
do you really?
what's the cruise?
it's like
a little rock festival
headlined by one band
and then there's lots of other bands on
a cruise ship. So it's like, it takes all the
family and old people
and kids and all that element out of cruising
and it's just fun people. And you've done that?
Yeah, a few times. But is it
a pot thing?
Anything is a pot thing if you do it right. Yeah, if you're me and you show up, it's a few times. But is it a pot thing? Anything is a pot thing if you do it right.
Yeah, if you're me and you show up, it's a pot thing.
Oh, I see.
That's Thanksgiving.
I've been offered, yeah.
I've offered it in lots of strange places.
But the first 311 cruise that I went on,
I would just, walking down the hallway,
if I smelled weed coming out of one of the rooms,
I'd just knock on the door, and they would
open the door, and I would walk in and smoke
with them. Like, every time.
They were already playing super high me.
It was already on the scene. Nobody turned me away.
It was like kind of an adult trick-or-treat
where
it's just understood, you know,
you gotta smoke this guy out if he comes knocking.
I'm the one who knocks, Bob.
Yeah.
You know, you got to smoke this guy out if he comes knocking.
I'm the one who knocks, Bob.
Yeah.
So, Bob, really quickly, you were in everything that was great this last year.
Like, you had an insane year of being in amazing things.
I did.
Thank you.
Hooray for Hollywood, huh?
Spectacular.
Now.
Yeah.
Ass backwards. I'm just kidding. No, you were in that, right? Spectacular now. Yeah. Ass backwards.
I'm just kidding.
No, you were in that, right?
It's a good movie.
Yeah, it's fun, right?
Yeah.
But there was another one that was like a critically acclaimed Nebraska, of course.
Nebraska.
But there was another one. How I Met Your Mother.
Breaking Bad.
Well, Breaking Bad, of course.
The finale was this year. That The finale. Was this here?
That was it.
Was there another one?
You were great in the finale, by the way.
I was not in it.
Were you bummed, Bob, when you read the script?
You were like, I'm not in this goddamn thing.
This ending sucked.
That's all I can say.
I don't know.
I don't know why.
It just was lacking.
Yeah, why didn't he go and meet you in a diner
while some Journey was playing?
It was like the last scene.
That could have been cool.
I had a big year, and I can't believe it.
And I'm so happy with Nebraska.
You told me it just won some awards,
which makes me really happy.
Bruce Dern got noticed by the L.A. film critics
and June Squibb, who's amazing.
And
Spectacular Now, which I'm glad you noticed it
and talked about it. It's a great movie
and it came out earlier this year.
Yeah, your scene with the
young alcoholic. Miles Teller, yeah.
You have a couple scenes with him, but there's
one scene that's one of the better
somebody getting fired
scenes that I've ever seen.
I loved doing it.
You also had a birthday this year,
didn't you?
That's a rumor.
I will not justify that rumor.
This encourages people to think
I age.
You brought as something for the prize bag.
Those folks who have seen the movie
will get what this means.
It's hats that say
prize winner on them. From Nebraska.
From Nebraska, yeah. The saddest hat
in the world.
Breaks records for
sadness.
You don't think it's somebody that won millions of dollars
and also got the hat would follow through
with wearing the hat?
Get Warren Buffett
to wear that hat.
That's what I'd like to see.
By the way,
Will,
you're being really quiet.
Well,
you know,
he's...
He's just waiting his turn.
He's the nicest guy
in this business
and we're building up to him.
That's right.
Chris Cubis is here,
everybody.
Will doesn't speak
before I speak
Seeing as no one knows who I am
Yeah yeah
Well you of course
I thought it would be fun to have you on with Scott Aukerman
Because you've had incidents
Where people think that you're Reggie Watts
I feel bad
Walking past that line up front
Because I knew people were going to be like oh he's
No sorry
Disappointment
Just do one thing I don't were going to be like, oh, he's a... No, sorry. Disappointment. Just do one thing.
Just go... I don't know how to beatbox.
That's a
shitty racial stereotype. Not all black people know how to
beatbox.
I'm just asking you.
You do play basketball, though, right?
Make a noise.
I get it here. I understand the mistake here,
but I had a guy... I was taking
the trash out at the bar I work at
in Austin
or worked at in Austin,
like dumping garbage
into a dumpster
and somebody ran up
to ask me for my autograph
and I was like,
that's a,
you know him
because he's famous.
You think he's like,
took time off of famous
to come bar back
at this bar in Austin
like for an extra 200 bucks?
People have done
weirder things.
Have they?
Weird Al,
for instance.
Yeah.
Did you get his Christmas card?
No, not yet.
He's hanging off a cliff and his wife and daughter are just laughing on top of the cliff.
Anyway, Chris is the curator of the movie interruption shows at the Kansas City Alamo Draft House.
That's right.
You just started.
You've done a couple of them there.
We did Love Actually last week.
Yeah.
Which is weird.
Was I right about that movie?
So many fat jokes.
They're constantly making fun of people for being fat.
That aren't fat.
That British assistant lady is fucking hot.
Yeah, she looks good.
And they're all of a sudden like, what kind of gross, what would you even do?
Yeah, of course you would. Look at her. Yeah, yeah. You're And they're all of a sudden like, ugh, what kind of gross, would you even do? Yeah, of course you would.
Look at her.
Yeah, yeah.
You're Billy Bob Thornton.
You'll do anything.
Who else is in that movie?
That is a weird cameo.
Billy Bob Thornton
is the American president.
Yeah.
And Hugh Grant,
as the prime minister,
he shuts him down.
There's a scene
where he just gets him
to shut up.
Who else is in that movie?
Liam Neeson.
Rick, the sheriff from Walking Dead.
Yeah.
Keira Knightley.
Mr. Bean is in it.
It's every British person and Laura Linney.
The guy who did Four Weddings, right?
Yeah.
The Hobbit's in it, right?
I saw his most recent film with Martin Freeman.
In time.
I saw About Time with Martin Freeman.
Fuck, I always call it In Time.
In Calgary, where we're both shooting a show just now called Fargo.
And he was like, I have to see it.
I know this guy.
And I was like, well, we're not sitting in the same row.
Because I'm not that gay to go see a romantic-y movie with a guy and sit in the same row.
With Watson?
I'd hold hands with Watson.
He's adorable.
Usually people have a seat in between.
hold hands with Watson. He's adorable. Usually people have a seat in between.
We were
pretending that you were here.
And just not talking. And just not speaking.
And you blew it.
But thank you for being here. Will Forte, everybody.
Sorry. I came from
Santa Monica and I apologize. The traffic
did not go my way.
It doesn't really matter how far away you're coming from.
In my opinion, You're on time.
Or you're rude.
Thank you very much.
Gandhi.
It's about time that you got here.
And have you seen that film about time?
It's romantical.
Wait, is that?
No, no, no.
I'm thinking, is that the Justin?
No, that's a mistake I just made.
Okay.
I mean, you could think that movie's romantic.
I was here.
I remember that.
Yeah.
It was, right?
It's sort of romantic.
A man has cyphers in it, and they hold hands while they're running.
While they're running from the government.
But about time is good, Bob.
It's got a lot of good stuff going on in it.
I couldn't believe that he caught...
Bill Nye is in it as his dad.
That guy's great.
He's great.
And the kid is great.
I forget his name, but his dad's a famous actor.
Brendan Gleeson's son.
It's Brendan Gleeson's son?
Isn't that right?
Yeah, and I forget...
Jackie Gleeson?
Anyways, he's very good.
To the moon!
And Rachel McAdams, because she'll sign on with anything
where she gets to fuck a time traveler.
Oh, yeah?
It's happened three times now.
Back to the future four.
Yeah.
Yeah, she should do that.
We were talking about Nebraska while you were gone, Will,
or while you were not here yet.
And congratulations on all the awards and stuff.
Thank you very much.
Oh, man.
Thank you.
I heard the movie just won some more awards
at this LA Film Critics thing that Bruce and June got some.
Oh, yeah, Bruce and June got some awards.
And you won National Board of Review.
For the listener,
Will and Bob are stroking each other's cocks right now.
Do you like it here at the tip?
How's your tip doing?
And for those of you that are here, you know what's happening.
We don't need to explain it.
You have eyes.
What happened
when you won the National Board of Review?
Did you just get a phone call?
Were you at a place?
I was...
Racetrack?
I was doing a recording for a charity album,
because I support charity.
Sure.
And I had done Conan the night before
and told this story about biting my fingernails off
and putting them in my agent's mouth.
And it's a long story, but it somehow is a good luck thing.
So I thought that it was, I thought he was calling to give me shit about telling the
story on television, but it was Ron and Albert called to say that I got that award.
It was very, very exciting.
Do you know what you'll get?
Do you get like a cup with like Canadian coins in it?
I don't know.
I have no idea.
I think it's just a board.
It's just a wooden board?
Yeah.
Do they etch into it?
The National Board of Reviews.
Your name?
Yeah.
Are you supposed to like karate kick it?
Could be a cutting board maybe?
Yeah.
Put some wine, put some cheese on there?
I don't know.
Will you come back sometime and let us know what it was?
I'll bring the board.
That'll be sweet.
I think you also won an award for the movie where the word dad is said the most.
Oh, yeah.
I am very aware of that.
You have a hard time getting your dad's attention.
He's hard of hearing. He's hard of hearing.
Yeah, he also doesn't want to look at you.
Dad!
Dad!
It's a lot of that.
National Board of Review, ladies and gentlemen.
No amazing performance when they see one.
It's very real.
You guys were good playing brothers, too.
That was fun. It was really fun. I guys were good playing brothers, too. That was fun.
It was really fun.
I smell a spinoff.
Everything that you do now, Bob, you need a spinoff?
Is that what this is about?
Everything I do, I smell a spinoff.
Are you sure it's not just burnt toast and you're having a stroke?
What was your name in Nebraska?
Jerry Nebraska.
Ross.
My character
is Ross Grant.
Don't boss Ross.
Can you imagine me hounding
Alexander Payne? Come on!
God damn it!
Where are you going to be tomorrow?
I just want to say hi. I just want to see how you're doing. in her pain. Come on! God damn it! Where are you going to be tomorrow? Where are you going to be?
I just want to say hi. I just want to see how you're doing. Hey, what about
Don't Boss Ross? You don't have to use the title, but
the idea of it. Think,
you know, because he's the boss in this.
You know, but Don't Boss Ross, it's
you're flipping it. Come on, Alexander.
You've never
done it. Never been done. NBD.
That's the rule. You've got to do it if it's never been done.
That's the Hollywood rule, right?
When does Better Call Saul start?
The shooting starts in May.
What?
Yeah.
Have you written a script yet, Bob?
No, they just started writing.
Have you told them how you want to play everything?
Oh, my God.
I gave them so many.
I gave them riders and rules and things.
Did you give them the 12 rules of Saul?
12, yeah.
I wish I could get it down to 12.
But always gets laid, never gets shot.
I'm sorry, never dies.
Has to, if anyone punches him,
it has to hurt their fist more than his face.
I think when your name is in the title of the show,
the never dies thing is really not something
you need to worry about.
Unless the third season takes place in heaven.
I don't know.
Valerie's family.
It's a sad example.
The saddest example ever.
The Hogan's.
Now, Chris Cubis brought
for the prize bag a
lovely birthday card and a
$20 bill.
Hey, I couldn't get changed,
so whoever wins owes me
ten bucks.
I had a cab to take.
And then the next movie interruption
you're doing there in Kansas City is Friday?
Friday we're doing Lethal Weapon.
Lethal Weapon.
It'd be good to see Danny Glover
interacting with him before he
knew what a psycho racist he was.
And just sort of play it as that.
You know what I mean?
Wait, how does this go?
You're a racist.
I'm too old for this pack of...
What happened to the movie Interruption?
How does it go?
Where, you know,
me and my friends sit in the front row
with microphones and...
Do you stop the movie?
No.
Just pile through.
We just improvise everything.
That's great.
Scott's done it a bunch of times.
So you should do it, Bob.
Remember David and I did it with the Steven Seagal movie
on Deadly Ground.
I don't remember.
You're saying that like I was there.
Or what? Should I look in the history books?
But you're not substituting
dialogue. You're just commenting.
Just the kind of shit you'd say
sitting around with your friends watching a movie
that's of varying quality.
We've shown some decent movies.
We also showed Gothica two weeks ago.
Oh, god damn it.
Yeah, Doug and I did Gothica.
So strange.
I've got to say, Chris is a really funny stand-up
for those listening.
Thank you.
I saw you in Austin. You were hilarious. Cheers. listening. Thank you. I appreciate that. I saw you in Austin.
You were hilarious.
No, cheers.
Thank you very much.
I appreciate that.
I don't...
I'm out here doing...
Yeah, I don't know.
Fucking Doug got me too stoked.
What's happening?
My brain just shut down.
You were looking at me
like I was supposed
to do something.
I'm not used to
getting compliments,
so it took me by surprise.
Hey, fuck you, man.
Scott brought a CD that is not of his own work.
These are really hard to get, though.
He brought the six most important sets in the history of stand-up feature.
That's Matt Besser's CD.
Yeah, you can't find those anywhere.
Especially not in the lobby.
Walking in here.
What is it?
Well, they call them CDs now, Bob. It used to be vinyl. Walking in here. What is it? It's sick.
Well, they call them CDs now, Bob.
It used to be vinyl.
It was short for compact discs.
Because these discs were more compact than a record.
I had no idea.
I don't.
So it's like a tiny record.
In a lot of ways, it is.
Have you been to the cinema lately, Scott Aukerman?
I saw Nebraska, and I loved. I told you guys that.
That was fantastic. I saw the
Woof of Wolf Street.
And I feel like I saw something
the next day, too. I had a one-two punch
of something that's coming out.
Oh, you saw Her?
Yeah, I saw Her. I love Her.
Her is great.
It's really, really interesting.
Yeah, I'm excited.
And The Wolf of Wall Street,
we were talking about it backstage.
It's like, it's Goodfellas.
Exactly.
Like, every scene is Goodfellas.
But in a great way.
In a great way.
Like, I've wanted to see Goodfellas
in another movie just like it
for the past 20 years.
Keep making movies like that.
What are you fucking around with Hugo for? Greatfellas, another movie just like it, for the past 20 years. Keep making movies like that. What are you fucking around with Hugh Grant for?
Great Fellas, exactly.
That may be better, fellas.
That's another spinoff for Bob.
Great Fellas!
Come on!
No, I just smell a toast.
Wait, can I go back to that?
So you really do smell toast?
Yes, anytime you ever smell toast, you should call 911.
It's a stroke.
Because toast is odorless.
I don't know if you know that, Will.
Is there also something for smelling bacon?
Yes.
That's if you call 911, but on the police side.
GTK.
Good to know.
Ask for the police extension. Yeah, what's the ask for the police extension
yeah what's the extension
for the police
hello 911
I want to smell bacon
they'll still come
I cannot afford bacon
what about Walter Mitty Scott
uh it's good
yeah that's what Chris Hardwick said about
the incredible Burt Wonderstone.
I like Burt Wonderstone. See that
the voice goes up when you're lying.
I do like Burt Wonderstone.
I thought that was funny. I have weird tastes in
comedies. Anything makes me laugh.
Oh, thanks for that compliment before then, Scott.
Appreciate it.
Wait a second.
You liked Burt Wonderstone.
It's not Mr. Show.
No, I know.
Sorry.
I haven't seen it, but I mean, I've seen a little moments of it.
It looks like a disaster. It's a bit of a misfire
but then it's only just
seen one
well intended though
it's not fair
all the people in it are good
yeah everyone's good
it made me laugh
like you know
I don't think if anything
doesn't work all the way through
it should be vilified
like it's the worst piece of shit
it's just like
yeah it tried
especially comedies right
yeah you know
if scenes are funny
it's like
we're seeing
the end is really really funny and there's funny and I think Jim Carrey is really funny in it you know, there's... If scenes are funny, it's like, we're seeing. The end is really, really funny, and there's funny...
And I think Jim Carrey is really funny in it.
You know, there's a movie that people adore
that I think a lot of it doesn't work,
and it's The Big Lebowski.
Mm-hmm.
I feel like...
I love it.
It's a mixed bag.
I love it.
Once you know all the ingredients,
you can enjoy the parts that you enjoy.
But the parts that don't work really don't work.
I think it's great on a second viewing
because you're no longer thinking about the plot.
You know the plot isn't going to go anywhere
and you just enjoy it scene to scene.
You know what I mean?
But when I saw it the first time,
I was very frustrated by a plot
that was not working for me.
Yeah.
And then the last time I saw it,
I was just like, ah, he's so funny.
Right.
You stop.
And that's true of a lot of comedies, I think,
where you can really enjoy parts of them,
and it doesn't matter.
Yeah.
Yeah, and that movie's great in that pretty much every scene
for the first 20, 30 minutes of the movie
introduces a new hilarious character.
There's lots of funny characters,
and they keep popping up and doing weird shit.
But if you're wondering where it's going to go,
you sort of feel unmoored.
Yeah. Once
you start having musical dream sequences,
you should pretty much give up on
the fact that it's going to be
coherent. Right.
What about you, Chris?
Did I ask you, Bob, if you've seen anything lately?
I did see...
I saw
Dallas Buyers Club.
My mom, by the way, I saw her over Thanksgiving,
and I was showing her screeners.
I was like, do you want to take any of these back home with you to Arizona?
And she looks at Dallas Buyers Club and goes, what is this?
I go, it's the one where Matthew McConaughey, he gets HIV positive.
And she goes, oh, no, if your dad wouldn't watch Tom Hanks get AIDS,
he's not going to watch this guy.
As it turns out, though, he'd probably relate to the McConaughey character more
because he's very much against.
Like, he probably didn't see or like Philadelphia.
That sort of... They should have had that character in the movie see or like Philadelphia.
They should have had that character in the movie,
go see Philadelphia.
And then ask for his money back.
It was really well played.
McConaughey is amazing.
He's so good at it.
Jared Leto is really good.
Jared Leto.
Unreal, those guys.
In Wolf of Wall Street, do you think McConaughey... He hadn't gained the weight back yet.
Yeah, yeah.
He looks weird.
Because Kulop came out of it saying,
he's really slimmed down.
He looks good.
I was like, you haven't seen Dallas Buyers Club yet.
No, because on that new HBO series,
he looks pretty normal again.
Normal in the sense of amazing muscles
and sculpted bronze gorgeousness.
Yeah.
I don't know why he lost the weight for that movie.
I would have believed a guy with AIDS that just looks like Matthew McConaughey always does.
It's so dangerous how much weight he lost, though.
It's scary.
Scary.
Yeah.
Chris, what about you?
I saw Out of the Furnace that
Christian Bale... Was it good?
It's like... I mean, really,
it's good. Everyone in it is really good. Woody Harrelson
is really good. Everybody in it is really good, but by the
end of the movie, you're like, oh, that was a movie.
Like, nothing... You don't go anywhere. Nothing
really happens, so it's hard to say.
Oh, so you don't even get out of the furnace?
Christian Bale, Woody Harrelson's crazy
in the entire thing, and Christian Bale is
just waiting for him to go crazy the whole time,
but he never does, so it's kind of like
cock blocking in a way.
I don't know how your cock
works, but my cock only gets hard when Christian Bale
goes crazy, so
it got weird. You just watched that
footage from the Terminator set?
That's all, I just watch YouTube videos over and over again.
Get the fuck out of my shot.
And I saw Catching Fire.
But people dress up to that movie?
No.
People, opening night, people dressed up like the people from the Capitol or whatever, like the crazy.
Sure.
I saw a guy in the lobby, and he's like looking at the theaters where I work, and he's looking around trying to think.
I was like, oh, it's in this theater right here.
He's all dressed up.
I thought, except he's like, no, I'm going to see Thor 2 or whatever.
He's just a douchebag with that kind of beard.
He just had a weird stripy beard.
Your beard would fit in the Hunger Games.
In the woods?
Not in the Capitol.
They got nice trimmed.
Oh, yeah, they are trimmed up nice.
But that one guy with the really crazy beard from the first movie,
he's out. Now it's Philip Seymour Hoffman.
Yeah.
Are we just going to talk?
Hunger Games canon now?
My daughter wants to see that movie.
Do you just drop your daughter off at theaters
and go, have a ball, honey!
See you in seven hours.
She's 19.
I do not do that.
You seem to take offense at that.
I don't want to.
At the intimation that you're a bad dad.
You're irritated right now.
I'm trying to win a mug.
And it is the number one dad mug.
I'm sorry.
All I got to do is hang in there another two years,
and I think I get it
You can put your mug on his board
And we're all back
Every time we go to the farmer's market
I show the kids
Look at the mugs kids
Let's go to the mug store
I just want to see what they have
I don't really
Dad you always go to this corner
You just stand there I don't know... Dad, you always go to this corner. You just stand there.
I don't know.
I just...
I don't know.
Mugs are good, you know?
Good way to tell where you stand in life.
Anyways.
Will, what have you seen lately?
Anything?
I saw Captain Phillips.
Oh, nice one.
I really enjoyed that.
And I saw Blue Jasmine last one. I really enjoyed that. And I saw Blue Jasmine last night and really enjoyed that.
That's good.
Yeah.
Really good.
And I saw Dallas Buyers Club as well recently and enjoyed that.
I've been enjoying a lot of movies.
I saw All Is Lost and was blown away by it.
Oh, I haven't seen it yet.
Is that the Robert Redford one?
Yeah, Redford.
and was blown away by it. Oh, I haven't seen it yet.
Is that the Robert Redford one?
Yeah, Redford.
And I highly recommend you see it in a theater
because it's out in the ocean
and it's really well shot.
It's like there's no dialogue in it, right?
But this guy, this director did an amazing job
because he's just a guy trying to stay alive,
but he just makes it really gripping and
totally keeps you involved
the whole time. You never
get bored or waver. You're just like right
with this guy. Is Robert Redford awesome in it?
He's fantastic. I don't think
I've ever liked him that much as in this movie.
And I think I'm going to like DiCaprio
for the first time in Wolf of Wall Street.
Sounds like he's awesome.
Do you like him in What's Eating Gilbert Grape?
Yeah, he was good in that.
And by the way, I heard it's the best thing he's done
since Gilbert Grape.
But that's a long time
to hold it back.
Titanic?
He's good in that.
He's got the big ship, though.
Kicking ass.
It's hard to show up that ship.
Never act with a ship.
You know that, right?
That is an old-as-fucking-rule.
People are constantly watching.
When's the ship going to sink?
I love the ship.
There's actors up here.
Hello.
But people are just ship crazy.
Their eyes are just on the ship.
Well, speaking of ships,
someone tonight is going to win a cabin
for two on the Weezer cruise.
Kick ass.
That's amazing. And I'm going to come knocking
on your door, whoever the winner is.
What the hell is the Weezer cruise?
Did we go
over this? Not ten
minutes ago? I remember
vaguely
the conversation about specialty cruises,
and I even read the article about it in the New York Times a year and a half ago.
But tell me who's on the Weezer cruise.
That's what I'm saying.
Oh, you mean like Weezer will be there?
Like is Doug Benson there performing?
Yeah, I'll be there.
The Weezer group?
Who else?
Financial advice, the Weezer group. Adam Devine from Workaholics is going to be there. The Weezer Group. Who else? Financial advice, the Weezer Group.
Adam Devine from Workaholics is going to be there.
And then a bunch of other bands.
There have to be other bands, right?
Yeah, a bunch of other bands.
The last Weezer Cruise I went on, I became friends with
and really like a band that I've been following ever since
that I'd never heard of before the Weezer Cruise
called Sleeper Agent.
They're really good. Wow. Cool.
We gotta play
a game, you guys. Does anybody
ender for games?
Because we gotta give away this
cruise. And Will, what
happened is, everybody, we'll talk you through this
game. I know you might not be familiar
with what's going on. Bob looks so scared.
So people made,
you know, that guy's trying to suck up
to Scott Aukerman with
whatever he's got. But
what you do is you just go out into the audience
and pick the name tag
that speaks to you or you think
they did the best job or
whatever, anyone you want.
Each of us? Yeah, just each of you go grab
one, and then bring it back to your seat.
The person you want to play for.
Generally, like, the most creative
or whatever. And while they do that,
we'll do this. We'll be right back.
Alright, we're back. Who are you
playing for, Will? Now I gotta win?
God damn it. I am playing for
Ben, who, uh, gotta win? God damn it. I am playing for Ben,
who,
his movie is Children of Ben.
Children of Ben.
Yeah.
What is your name?
So it's kind of like,
it was a really
close one
between that
and Blake Placid.
But that would have
been a good,
Children of Ben
would have been
a good title
for Delivery Man.
If his character's
name was Ben.
Delivery Ben. Or Meet the Little Fockers.
Chris, who are you playing for?
Melissa, I think this says. Is it Melissa?
Yeah, yeah. Looks like a W
there. She made your face on a pillow
and there's a wreath. That's an
actual wreath, so it's stabbing me as we speak.
I'm not taking it away from me as we speak. I'm not
taking it away from my balls, Doug. I'm not going to do it.
Can you hang it on the front of the table or something?
We'll find out. Let's see if that'll work.
That's not going to work.
Shit out of you.
People are...
I love how people
are sad about a pillow falling to the ground
like it's a fucking American flag or some shit.
No!
Who are you playing for, Bob?
Megan is her name,
and I have her helmet that she wears
in roller derby,
and the helmet has a name on it,
like her roller derby name,
Bell Scorcho.
Bell Scorcho, which is a Weez roller derby name, Belle Scorcho.
Belle Scorcho, which is a Weezer song, right?
Belle Scorcho, that's good.
Nice selection, Bob. I figured since she didn't just make something for tonight,
she actually lives with this appreciation of Weezer all the time.
She's always trying to win the cruise.
Wherever she is, when she's wearing it she's
hoping someone goes we need your helmet for a contest to get on that cruise you
know I mean I know exactly I'm on to you yes Scott who you played for Matt he He made a sign that's Yeah, don't read the
Everybody gets to name a shithead if they lose tonight
And that's what that is
On top of the Matt sign
You excited, Matt?
Yes
All right, well, good luck to everybody
You know, anybody could win tonight
In a four-man game, anything could happen.
We're going to start with Scott Aukerman,
because he's a returning winner from a couple weeks ago.
I had you skip the most obnoxious guest episode.
Thank you. I appreciate that.
You're welcome.
And you get to pick the first category.
Here we go.
Let's do it.
Celebrating a birthday
today,
Ken Branagh.
Kenneth. Oh, yeah, Kenneth.
Yes.
That guy. So the films of
Kenneth Branagh. Meaning
starred in and directed?
It could be directed, but it's probably
not Thor Hamlet.
Okay.
So yeah, so that dude.
And then your next option is
Life Takes Visa,
and that's movies where someone gets deported.
And your third option,
as suggested on Twitter by
at Drew Robbs,
R-O-B-Z, is The Lone Arranger.
And that's movies that have a florist in them.
I'll go Lone Arranger.
All right.
2010 is the year.
This movie that has
some sort of florist in it
two stars from Leonard
he calls this movie
oh boy
he says the director appears in it
unbilled
so that's pretty sneaky
and he also calls this movie a pastiche.
And he lists
22 names?
I think that's how many there are.
Oh boy.
Doug, I can name this in zero names.
Okay.
Yeah, so he's coming out of the gate strong, Bob.
I don't know what that is, too.
You know what the movie is, you think?
Yeah, I know what it is.
All right, so here's what you can do.
If you think you know it,
and you think you know who the top-billed person in the movie is.
2010, you said.
Yeah, yeah.
You can say negative one names, and all you got to do is name the movie and the top-ed person in the movie is. 2010, you said. Yeah, yeah. You can say negative one names.
And all you gotta do is name the movie
and the top billed person.
But if you don't think you could do that,
then you should challenge Scott to name that movie.
All right, I challenge you.
Oh, okay.
I mean, I think I know what it is, but...
Wait.
Do you think you know who the top billed person is in it?
I think I do.
Can I say what I...
So say negative one.
Negative one.
Nice.
And now what do I do?
Sound like you mean it.
And you're going to have to name the movie
and the top-billed performer in that movie.
And then you'll win the point.
If I challenge him?
Huh?
Oh, that's right.
Right?
Because it goes to Chris now.
Because I could go negative two. Chris could go deeper, yeah.
But I don't know what the word pastiche means.
So Bob Odenkirk, name that movie, please.
Alright, so Bob has to
name it and the lead performer.
If I don't get this right, what happens to me?
Nothing will happen to you.
Scott will get a point.
No, Chris does.
Oh, Chris will get the point, yeah.
Unfortunately. Yeah, that is get the point, yeah. Unfortunately.
Yeah, that is a sad turn of events.
So I can't hurt Scott in any way right now.
I can't punch him.
Not really, no.
It'll emotionally hurt if I get the point.
You hurt him when you didn't ask him to name it,
because he knows what it is.
It is 2010, you say?
Mm-hmm.
This is killing me.
Is it New Year's Eve?
No.
You idiot.
With Ashton Kutcher? No.
Wrong title. It was Valentine's Day and Ashton Kutcher. No. Wrong title.
It was Valentine's Day
and Ashton Kutcher
was the number one
top bill person.
Fucking hell.
But I get your confusion
because on New Year's Eve
is when you send flowers
to whoever you love.
No, but they made another one, right?
They did New Year's, right?
Yeah.
You were definitely on the right track.
And they did Valentine's Day.
It was one of those two.
I couldn't remember.
Come on.
Who can remember which one of those fucking things came out?
Ashton was in both, I think.
I think so.
So the other one came out then in 2012.
Two years later.
Yeah, something like that.
Because that first one was such a smash.
And then with New Year's Eve,
it didn't work out quite as well.
The people didn't go to a New Year's Eve movie.
Did you just say your catchphrase?
Yes, I did.
Always weaving it in.
I'm interrupting New Year's Eve at CineFamily on next Monday, I did. Always weaving it in. I'm interrupting New Year's Eve
at CineFamily on next Monday, I believe.
Why don't you wait until New Year's Eve?
Because then I'm going to do a movie
called December 16th.
Thanks for setting me up for that one, Scott.
No problem.
All right, so Will, do you think you understand
what's going on with this game? I
think so. Because we're finally gonna
put you in play. Okay. You get to go
first. The order changes, so then it's gonna come to Chris.
And you get to pick a category.
The late, great Michael Clark
Duncan would be celebrating a birthday today
if he was still with us. Or maybe
they still have birthdays wherever he is.
But the films of Michael Clarke Duncan,
you know who that is, right?
Yes, I do.
Okay, cool.
And then, oh, this is fun.
This is fun.
This category came up now.
Walter Whiteys.
And that's movies that have a dealer in their underwear.
It's happened in motion pictures, too,
in addition to Breaking Bad.
And then, this is a fun one for this time of year.
At MLC Lanny suggested White Christmas.
And of course, that's movies that have Nazis in them.
Which one of those would you like to play, Will?
I would like to play
Michael Clark Duncan.
Dealers in their underwear.
I'm going to try
two Michael Clark Duncan movies.
Oh!
I'm hoping.
So you may,
it might be right
in your wheelhouse.
Two stars from Leonard Maltin for this movie. That. I'm hoping. So you may, it might be right in your wheelhouse. Two stars from
Leonard Maltin
for this movie.
That takes both
movies out.
One,
because you're
thinking of a couple
classics.
But you know,
I think one maybe
got more stars than
that.
Just Leonard's
opinion.
Okay.
Well,
this is from 2006.
I don't know.
Leonard says,
Leonard calls this movie broad
and he also says
that various celebrities
appear as themselves
in this movie
and the year is 2006
and he names
14 names
Does Tom
Hanks play himself in the Green Mile?
Is that cheating to ask?
He did in Philadelphia, according to my mom.
But here's what you do.
Since you're first and you're unsure of what it might be,
you can just bid 14 names, which means if you were challenged,
you get to hear all the names.
I'll bid
eight names.
Oh, okay.
Took a big bite out of it.
I recommended 14. He's like, I'll go eight.
I like it. Big dick. Do it.
Oh, shit.
Do it.
I thought then somebody else said it.
I was kidding.
I'm going to go seven. He's? No, no, you don't.
I'm going to go seven.
I'm going to go seven. He's going to say seven.
Wait, I don't know what we're promising here.
We're promising that we can name this many names from this film?
If he reads all the names.
He'll read that many names from the bottom of the cast list.
Oh, before you know the name of it?
Oh, it starts from the bottom.
It starts from the bottom.
Okay, okay.
Before you guess what the name is.
I'll go four.
Oh.
That's fancy big.
I'll say name that movie, Bob.
All right.
Michael Clarke Duncan, 2004.
Yeah, he's in it for sure.
2006.
He may not be one of the four at the bottom, but he's in it.
The four names at the bottom of the cast list out of 14 are Rob Riggle,
Pat Hingle, Dave
Koechner, and
Greg German.
Greg German.
He's a character actor. He's very good.
He is very good, but I think it's German, isn't it?
No. No, it isn't.
That's how I say it,
so that's how it should be.
It's not.
Jesus.
German?
Yeah.
Okay, man.
I don't know.
You have no idea?
I have no clue.
It's a silly saga, according to Leonard.
Does somebody else get another try?
No, I win.
That was it.
Scott gets the point.
And the motion picture is called Talladega Nights.
The Ballad of Ricky Bobby.
And Scott's on the board.
Apologies to put your hands together.
We're going to get this thing done as soon as possible
and give away this cruise.
Sorry, Megan.
Where do we start?
What happened?
Scott challenged
I got the point
I challenged Bob
Because you challenged Bob
So that means we start with Will and go to Scott
Okay
Yeah
Will
Still have no idea how this game is played
Too old for this shit
That's movies where someone dies in or near a bathroom.
Radio Flyer.
That's movies where Cuba Gooding flies.
And Read It and Weep.
And that's foreign Tear Jerkers.
I will do the too old for this shit.
All right, you get to pick a year.
Would you like a movie where someone dies in or near a bathroom from, let's see, 1960 or 1993 or 1998?
1993, please.
Okay.
Three and a half stars from Leonard Maltin for this movie
from 1993 that he says it involves a billionaire
and doesn't say anything about
whether his wife is there or not.
Movie star?
And the rest?
It doesn't say.
It doesn't say.
It says that the story of this movie
can't bear close scrutiny.
So yeah.
Meow, Leonard.
Leonard went after it
and he says it won three Oscars.
He's just reporting.
Someone dies in or near a bathroom, and Leonard lists 11 names.
So how many names do you think it would take?
So there is a billionaire in this, and this is the main thing about the movie,
or is this like a peripheral storyline involving a billionaire?
Am I allowed to know that?
Well, if Leonard says it's about a billionaire,
he's definitely kind of the middle of the story.
I will...
You said 11 names?
Mm-hmm.
I'll do 11 names.
Yeah, see, now you're getting it.
Now you're on this. I'll do 10 names. Yeah, see, now you're getting it. Now you're on this.
I'll do 10 names.
Bob?
I'll do 8 names.
Now I feel like a dick if I don't say 7,
but I also feel like Bob might not get it in 8.
Go with your heart, man.
Fuck, it's 7. Let's do this.
I'm going to say 6.
It's exciting. It's exciting. I'm going to say name that. Let's do this. I'm going to say six. Aw, what the hell was that?
It's exciting.
It's exciting.
I'm going to say name that movie, Will.
Okay, I'm going to try to.
All right.
Somebody dies in or near a bathroom.
Three and a half stars.
1993.
There's a billionaire in it.
Cha-ching.
Story can't.
Shitting in a cash register? The story. There's a billionaire shitting in a cash register
he's a billionaire shitting
can't bear
gotta keep it somewhere
gotta take it with you
can't bear
close scrutiny
won three Oscars
and your six names
is that what he said
are Wayne Knight Samuel L. Jackson,
Ariana Richards,
Joseph Mazzello,
B.D. Wong, and Martin
Ferrero.
Ferrero.
And this was a
three and a half star
creation.
Matt! You're going to the Weezer Cruise
I'm still gonna name a movie
so who knows
maybe I get lucky
Wayne Knight
I get lucky
okay I will say
Jurassic Park
fuck Wayne Knight. I feel lucky. Okay, I will say Jurassic Park. Fuck! Fuck!
Will Forte is on the board.
He is.
Yeah, fuck you, Matt.
Man.
Tremendous.
National Board of fucking Review, dude.
Sorry.
I'm sorry, Mr. Forte.
I'm sorry. Forte. I'm sorry.
Alright. So Scott challenged Will.
Sorry for the premature
celebration.
Celebration, Matt.
So that means that
we're going to start with
Bob and go to Scott.
Right?
Bob,
would you like Mauled to Death?
That's movies that feature
Gretchen Maul or take place in a mall.
Anywhere they intersect at all?
Rushmore,
and that's movies that have
Washington, Jefferson, Lincoln,
or Roosevelt in them
as a character,
not the real people.
And
Inconceivable!
And that, of course,
is movies that
have infertile women
in them.
I'll go with the Ma one.
The Ma to Death?
Ma to Death.
Okay.
The year is 1978.
Three and a half stars from Leonard.
He's loving everything.
Three and a half stars from Leonard.
He's loving everything.
He calls this movie metaphorically rich.
He also says...
Where?
Car wash.
No pre-guessing, sir.
Followed by a sequel, he says.
That's a good clue.
78 is the year.
78 and there was a sequel.
Five names.
There's only five names in it?
Yeah.
And it's not Mallrats.
Gretchen Mall. It takes place in a mall it's not Mallrats. Gretchen Mall.
It takes place in a mall.
Mallrats was a few years later.
I think that was like 81.
I know, I know, I know.
78 is what we're talking about.
So you probably want to bid five names, I would guess.
I'm already seeing the unfortunate handwriting on the wall here of what's going to happen.
78, is that?
It's the one after 77.
What's happening?
I'm going to say two names.
Okay.
Doug, I can name it in zero names.
Oh, shit. Okay. Doug, I can name it in zero names.
Oh, shit.
Does it go to... It goes to Will.
It goes to Will now, yeah, yeah.
And, uh...
Will, do you think you have an idea what this movie is?
No.
So, yes, unfortunately you're forced to just say,
name that movie Scott Ackerman
and hope that he gets it wrong.
1978, in a mall, sequel.
You got it.
Name that movie.
Doug, is it Dawn of the Dead?
It is.
Matt, you are going to the Weezer Cruise.
That was...
That was a spectacular game.
Oh, no, Chris has a Dawn of the Dead tattoo.
It's fucking my favorite movie of all time.
I have the logo tattooed on the back of my leg.
Did you know any of the actors?
Ken Foray.
I kind of started naming names.
Yeah, that's a tough one.
Tough one to know names.
The top-billed dude's name is David M.G.
M.G.
Yeah.
Of the MGMs?
Matt, you want to come and give me your email address
and your full name and your social security number?
So now what happens?
We read these angry notes.
Oh, look at that.
I have some detail cards.
Matt?
Hey, I might have a car, you son of a bitch.
I don't.
Hi, Matt.
Congratulations, man. Here, take me. You get the
prize bag. Matt immediately got on the stage
and started handing out business cards
if you're listening. Matt,
I'm sorry. I picked you.
You're still good to go.
Congrats.
Would you do it if I wanted to get some detailing done
on a rental car that I have right now?
Do you think anyone would mind
if we just cleaned it up a little bit?
Made it nice?
Alright, sit down.
Congratulations, dude.
Yeah.
I hope I don't lose this card.
But you know how to read.
You're on Twitter, right, Matt?
No.
No.
Too busy detailing.
Yeah.
Can't afford 140 characters.
Do we read his shithead or? What's that? Because he won? Do we read his shithead?
What's that?
Because he won?
Do we read his shithead?
No, he doesn't get that.
I'm going to read it myself.
He doesn't get that consolation prize.
And Chris's doesn't have a...
Oh, this is it?
Okay.
And Bob, does your helmet have a shithead on it somewhere?
Oh, okay.
So who's left out?
Will's.
Oh, Will's.
We need somebody for Will.
Scott, what do you got to plug?
Comedy Bang Bang season finale
is coming.
When does this come out?
Now-ish, tonight.
Now-ish, okay.
So we have two more episodes left
before the end of the year.
A really cool one this Friday
with Kobe Smulders.
That's a really cool episode, I think.
And then our Christmas episode
with Zach Galifianakis as Santa.
Our big Christmas
holiday episode. And then we're back
in spring.
Yay!
Yahoo!
Bob, what's going on with you? After you watch
Bang Bang, watch The Birthday Boys.
Yeah!
Really funny sketch show on IFC.
And please go see Nebraska in theaters now.
Yeah, that's it. Oh, DVD box set of Breaking Bad came out.
Of all the whole thing.
Everything.
You can get it all.
Chris Cubis, Friday nights, Alamo Draft House in Kansas City, Missouri.
Kansas City, Canada?
Yeah, no, Missouri.
Come out to that.
Watch Southland on TNT.
I'm not in that or anything.
Just more people should watch that show.
It's better than people give it credit for.
It's pretty, it gets some credit.
People seem to like it.
Will?
I'm going to double up and say Nebraska, please.
And go see Captain Phillips.
I just saw it.
It's really good.
I heard you enjoyed yourself.
Buy a ticket for Nebraska and then sneak into Captain Phillips.
In fact, from now on, every movie you go to,
buy a ticket to Nebraska and sneak into the other movies.
Yes.
Yeah. Let's get those numbers up. MacGruber 2, is it happening? every movie you go to, buy a ticket to Nebraska and sneak into the other movies. Yes.
Let's get those numbers up.
MacGruber 2, is it happening?
We hope. At some point.
Way down the line.
No, no, no.
You're writing the script now.
We are. We are writing the script.
And it's about to happen.
And it's about to happen, yeah.
Alright. The more you say it, it comes true. I'll be at the Orlando Improv And it's about to happen, yeah. All right.
The more you say it, it comes true.
I'll be at the Orlando Improv January 4th and 5th.
And thanks to all of my guests.
Thank you guys for being here, for bringing awesome name tags.
And I'll see Matt on the Weezer cruise.
I can't wait to hear all of his stories from the world of detailing.
Just hanging out on a boat.
And as always,
Matt Sharp
leaving Weezer
is a shithead.
So,
I made this
into a political thing.
I don't know
which one I like
better out of these two.
Not even getting
a consolation prize is a shithead.
Yeah, that guy's upset.
And I don't know why, I guess I agree.
Standardized testing is a shithead.
Now it's time for us to talk about your coffee.
Guys, the world is viewing how it makes it funny. There's no room in his heart for you. The Doug loves movies. He hides a bolded view and prowess makes him foggy.
There's no room in his heart for you,
cause Doug loves movies.