Doug Loves Movies - WMMR's Preston and Steve, Samm Levine, and Graham Elwood Guest
Episode Date: August 21, 2012Live from Helium Comedy Club in Philadelphia, Doug welcomes WMMR's Preston and Steve, actor Samm Levine, and comedian Graham Elwood to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy... and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Doug hates candy wrappers screening baby sticky seeds
With 50 azepop or kernels in his teeth
There's still not one that he won't see
Cause Doug loves movies Hey everybody
My name is Doug
And I love movies
Yeah
This is Doug Loves I love movies. Yeah.
This is Doug Loves Movies, coming to you from Helium Comedy Club in Philadelphia, PA, on Monday.
You guys love days of the week.
It's a Monday.
Woo!
Let's start the weekend early.
It's Monday, August 20th,
2 Oceans 12.
Did you guys bring name tags?
Let me see this.
It's got my face on it,
so that's never a good thing.
The dark side of Fister.
Your name is Fister?
And the movie was originally Twister.
Very well done. And you just have a postcard that says, take me, and then
me, comma, Kate. Okay.
Oh, there's an elf.
We've got an elf up front that says Lauren on it. It's an elf phone.
That's weird.
That's weird that that exists. All about Steve.
What? Oh, there's
two Alphs
that are phones
in the audience.
From now on, I'm
calling it Alphadelphia.
And what's your name on your Alph?
Seth. Okay. It's close to alf then we've got a poster for dick
but then she wrote wendy on it you really should find a friend named richard and let him use that
and then uh uh hell boy what'd you do to it though rachel boy That's like build a title but with names of a person
and a movie.
And then why does it say Gadzooks on a
big piece of paper right there?
Okay.
Alright. Fair enough.
We got a Saturday night. Oh this is ridiculous.
We're going to change the title
to show that Doug describes name tags.
There's some shit lighting up back there.
Oh, my God.
Well, you got...
What?
I can't see that one.
It's an ass?
Ew.
Why would you do that?
Doug loves buttholes.
Well, thank you to everybody who made the effort to make name tags,
which seems to be pretty much all of you.
It's a very impressive turnout, name tag-wise.
Since last I spoke and you listened,
I heard the sad news that director Tony Scott had committed suicide.
And in an eerie coincidence you guys probably
haven't heard it yet but last night I
taped a Douglas movies in New York
and during the course of the show
Days of Thunder and Last
Boy Scout both came up for different reasons
you know right
and then I heard the
news later and I was like oh is this going to bum people
out when they're listening to it that we're talking about
his movies and not saying anything
about what happened to him? So I'm saying
it now and we'll
say more about him later.
Now it's time for Tweet Relief, tweets about
movies. At Randy Lawson,
who I think is here tonight.
Is she? There she is.
She had a funny tweet the other day. She
tweeted,
disappointed to find out
The Watch is not a prequel to Pulp Fiction.
Think about it.
Speaking of buttholes,
is there a watch hanging out of that butthole?
This has been Tweet Relief,
treats about movies.
And good job, Randy.
R-A-N-D-I
Lawson spelled...
How else would you spell Lawson?
It's a prize box today.
It's so full of stuff
because my friends,
Garfunkel and Oates,
were here at Helium over the
weekend. Don't
get too excited. They're not here now.
They're not here now
but someone's going to win
pretty much every item
Garfunkel and Oates has ever
come up with. There's like
a t-shirt, several of
their albums and
stickers and kazoos and all sorts of stuff.
And I asked, Kate likes to draw little pictures of herself and Ricky,
and so they drew and signed a Garfunkel Notes Love Doug picture
that someone will win tonight.
Another guest, and we'll discuss this with him when he gets out here, picked up a
copy of Philadelphia Style Magazine
and
signed it. So you
got a signed copy of a magazine
that I'm sure he's not in.
But, you know,
maybe you don't have that issue yet.
He also brought
a copy of the book The Hunger Games
and he inscribed the inside
to whom it may concern please give this book
to a child or young adult
it is meant
for them
that's certainly how I felt about the
movie I haven't read the book
because I'm not a young adult
or a child.
I brought a Doug Loves Movies T-shirt.
It's a pretty big one,
so it'll fit almost anybody.
And another gentleman on the panel today
brought a copy of his new book
that's out and available.
And he's also got copies for you
later this evening.
And yeah, we'll
discuss this a little bit more once we get him out here.
Please welcome
you know them from WMMR,
Preston and Steve.
And
Graham Elwood
and Sam the Ma'am
Levine.
and Sam the Ma'am Levine.
Oh, shit got real, Philadelphia.
Yeah.
What's up, LA?
Boom. Boom.
Yeah, that's right.
They're making so much noise,
I couldn't say your full name,
a.k.a. Lil Wolverine.
Hang on, you guys talk amongst yourselves.
I'm going to shut that door over there.
Sorry, buddy. Oh, come on. Jesus. I'm going to shut that door over there. Sorry, buddy.
Oh, come on.
Jesus.
I'm extra Wolverine-y today.
I haven't shaved in like five hours.
You're the Homer Simpson of Wolverines.
It's accurate.
It's accurate.
Let's start with Preston and Steve, you guys.
Local phenoms.
Yeah.
Thank you for participating again.
They're sharing a microphone.
And it also doesn't seem like it's hot.
You guys, let's give the radio guys one mic and not turn it on.
Subtle way of communicating a message.
Yeah, no, it's an honor.
We were honored to be here again for this.
We had a great time the first time.
We kind of really sucked at the Leonard Maltin game,
so we thought that was it.
We were fucked, but no, you invited us back, so good.
Oh, being good or bad at the Leonard Maltin game
has nothing to do with return appearances.
I will cut back on someone's appearances
if they're too good at it.
What?
I'm kidding.
It doesn't matter either way.
And with Graham Elwood here,
Sam and Graham have gone head-to-head before, right?
Oh, indeed we have.
On the Leonard Maltin episode
where Graham said cocksucker several times
in front of that sweet older gentleman.
Oh, boy.
You should have heard him later on in the car.
Leonard, that is.
Leonard swears privately.
Like a fucking sailor.
So is he just like, that cocksucker Graham Elwood, how dare he swear in front of me?
That motherfucking asshole Graham Elwood, I'm going to beat the shit out of him with his mother's cock.
I don't know why. I don't know why.
He's such a gross old man.
It's terrible.
I'm going to tweet Jack at that
fucking cock knuckle.
We don't get to do this
on radio.
Get it all out, fellas.
With cocks, I don't want to
join that up there.
But, Steve, people outside this area can, of course,
catch up with Preston and Steve
and all the great interviews and bits that you do
by checking out your podcast.
The podcast, yeah, which does very well for us.
And, yeah, you can go to PrestonSteve.com
and WMMR.com and whatever other fucking.com we have.
LenMaltzAtCockSucker.com?
We have a whole cock sucker feature, which is awesome.
Now, as I understand it, Preston is kind of like the teller.
You're like a Penn and Teller kind of act where Steve does all the talking.
I prefer Shields and Yarnell.
Oh, my God.
I realized, Doug, since
you were inviting us here tonight
that I should probably get high before I came here
and I realized that's not a good idea to do in front of a live audience.
For me, personally.
So, I'm a little paranoid
right now.
Alright. So, I'm a little paranoid right now. All right.
I hope you're cool with Alf.
Because you're surrounded by Alfs right now.
I'm paranoid about which one's the real Alf.
Which one's the imposter.
Okay, so now you did just hear Preston's voice.
And Graham Elwood is here, everybody.
Hello!
Hello!
Hello, Philadelphia!
So nice to see all your glorious kitten hands
in the city of brotherly love.
Holy shit.
How are we supposed to know when we're doing stand-up here
what city we're in?
They painted over the city backdrop
and just put a couple of racing stripes
on the wall.
So we're at the DMV?
Yeah, line up this way.
Wow.
I mean, it was kind of,
it wasn't the best rendition of the city.
I thought it was very accurate.
So the book I mentioned earlier
is Graham's book with his podcasting partner,
Chris Mancini,
called The Comedy Film Nerds,
Guide to Motion Pictures.
Doug has a foreword on it.
Yeah, I wrote two whopping pages.
Yeah.
We had to cut him back because it was all like,
Mary Smith, bleh, bleh, bleh, bleh.
Let mom suck dick, bleh, bleh.
We're like, Doug, you can't say that in a book
and why are you typing with that voice
I prefer you didn't
say it here either
Leonard Maltin listens to this
Mr. Maltin sir
he's gonna spit that dick out when he hears you say that
is there something about Leonard Maltin I don't know
no no he's a great guy, and I apologize to him.
That's just smack to sincerity.
Yeah, yeah.
But anyway, I'll be back in two weeks headlining here,
September 5th through the 8th.
Yes.
Come on back.
You going to come in on the show?
I will be on Preston and Steve,
and my opening act will be my co-host Chris Mancini, who's a Philly native.
He'll be here.
And on September 6th, we'll be recording on this stage in front of the DMV Stripes,
a live recording of the Comedy Film Nerds podcast.
And I think there's going to be a little Wolverine as a guest on that show.
Someone's in town shooting a movie.
And I don't make you all sick of me tonight.
Come back on the 6th.
That's Sam the Ma'am, everybody.
Hello, Philadelphia.
That's my question for you, Sam, is what are you doing in Philly?
I am shooting the Leonard Maltin biopic.
Wow.
Called A Bag of Dicks.
A Bag of Dicks and Popcorn.
Oh, no.
That's how he meets girls.
Like Mickey Rourke in Diner, right? Reach into my popcorn bag. Oop, it's full he meets girls. Like Mickey Rourke in Diner.
Reach into my popcorn bag.
Oop, it's full of dicks.
You got your dicks in my popcorn.
You got my popcorn in my dicks.
Wait a minute.
Too great taste.
Stop it.
We'll be back with more of the roast of Leonard Maltin.
I am here shooting a television program.
Called Do No Harm.
Do No Harm for the National Broadcasting Company.
Ah.
Major network.
A major network.
Major network. Must see network. Major network.
Must see TV.
We are not on PAX, ladies and gentlemen.
Do not search for us there. Is that still a thing?
I hope so.
PAX?
I didn't think PAX was a thing still.
We are not on the ION network.
It's a drama for NBC, and it's going to start airing in February of next year, Sunday nights, probably.
Yeah, we'll see.
We'll see.
I think they're going to pop it on earlier.
We'll see.
We'll see.
Thank you.
I think they're going to have a lot of flops, and they're going to need it, and they're going to bring Sam the Mam in.
Bring the heavy hitters in early.
Yeah.
Hang on.
I just have to say, Phylicia Rashad is in the show.
Oh, my God, is she amazing.
Is she?
Your minds are going to be fucking blown.
Let me guess, does she play a psychic?
No.
Does she play an annoying person?
No.
I'm not going to be amazed by whatever it is she's going to do.
She plays like the chief of surgery.
Oh, it's a hospital thing?
Yeah, it's a medical drama.
Oh, okay.
But there's more to it, isn't there?
There's more to it.
There's another level to it.
There's a Jekyll and Hyde aspect to it that is really interesting.
I promise.
Yeah, well, because usually you don't have to say to a doctor,
please, do no harm.
Right.
Yeah, yeah.
Right?
When you get wheeled into the emergency room
you usually don't have to scream that.
Right, but on this show you do.
Make me better instead of worse!
Yes!
I beg of you!
What's Felicia Rashad doing here?
Is what you would say
if you went
into that hospital.
But if she's at the show we thank you for coming, Felicia.
Thank you, Felicia.
I'm going to guess no.
Then make it.
So what do you play?
Okay, so the lead is a guy named Steven Pasquale,
who was on the show Rescue Me.
Okay.
He's very handsome.
Answer the question I asked you.
I am his administrative assistant.
Oh, okay.
I know.
You've got to, from now on, though, in interviews,
say that you're playing Doogie Howser.
They did not promote me to doctor yet.
Not yet.
I was telling the club owner,
I was like, Sam Levine, you know,
he was on Freaks and Geeks,
he looks like he's 10.
Yeah. It's 10. Yeah.
It's a good look.
I wish I looked like I was 10.
I'll take it.
You fucking kidding me?
You're secretly like 100 years old.
I know.
You're 30.
I know.
Doug, Sam, and Ralph Macchio have all swam in the same fucking fountain of youth that's
full of Len Moulton's popcorn dicks.
Eat popcorn dicks.
It'll make you young, guys.
All right, let's talk
to President Steve for...
You want to get off
the dicks for a second?
God, if there's anything
you can do to help me
to get off of dicks,
I'm addicted.
Give a good pulse.
No, I wanted to ask you guys,
because you have a lot of,
both in person and in phone-ins,
you talk to some pretty big names.
Yeah.
Like, you know,
what's this,
is this like the,
you know what you do.
Let me tell you what else you do.
You wake up early.
He's trying to figure out what the fuck we do.
You interview a lot of really cool people.
What size market is this?
Is this the fifth biggest market in the country?
I never fucking failed it.
Just took a wild guess.
It's good and it's gotten better
because we used to be the bastard child of New York
so they'd go to New York and phone us
but now they come into town
because they know that we have shows being shot here
so celebrities will come in.
It makes a big difference.
When are you going to get Felicia Rashad to stop by?
You beat me too, you motherfucker.
We've done a lot of Cosby stuff on the show.
Have we crossed the line?
You think Felicia Rashad would do the show?
Yeah, she'd do show. I don't know. Have we crossed the line? You think Felicia Rashad would do the... Alright, alright. Yeah, she'd do it.
She'll do it? Okay. I'm assuming.
I'm assuming. Spoken like someone who slept with her. That's great, yeah.
Oh,
little Wolverine!
Well, I can read
it in the trades tomorrow. Sam Levine has been let
go from NBC's Juno Arm.
Nice going, Philadelphia.
You look like a 10-year-old boy.
So the question I was leading up to is
who's, and you can each answer this
one after the other
because you might have different opinions on it,
but who's like either in person or on the phone,
who was really like a movie star
that you did not care for, that you didn't enjoy
that you didn't like
talking to
well I mean as a movie star
that's a good question because the worst interview ever was Wayne Brady
he was just a straight up asshole
oh yeah no question
did he choke a bitch?
he choked a bitch
he's also not a movie star
but
well he made the distinction there.
Yeah, but that's interesting, though,
because his persona as a performer
is nicest guy alive.
Yeah, no.
But you know what?
With actors, we've found, like,
the bigger the star, actually, the nicer they are.
They get it.
They get the PR machine.
They know that they need the promotion, even though they're huge. But, I mean, we've talked to, the bigger the star, actually, the nicer they are. They get it. They get the PR machine. They know that they need the promotion
even though they're huge. But, I mean, we've talked
to, I don't know, Schwarzenegger,
Travolta, all these guys over the years.
Bradley Cooper, he's coming in next week.
And they all seem to be really cool.
It's the punky CW
actors and actresses that'll show up.
They're like, you're on, you're like
fourth level actor on Vampire
Diaries, fuckhead.
You know, you're the guy who hands him the steak and they'll come in with an attitude.
So, but we don't suffer that that much.
It's always the quirky people who are the most fun to interview.
One of the best interviews we ever had was Dolly Parton, of all people.
She was frigging awesome.
She's been in movies.
Yeah, she's been in movies.
Yes.
Rhinestone. Absolutely. She was friggin awesome. She's been in movies. Yeah, she's been in movies. Yes rhinestone
absolutely
What was that movie about her being a radio DJ what was that call with James woods straight talk yeah, yeah, there's a gay gentleman
Straight talk!
I have it up!
You guys have giant tits.
You're right, sir.
She's got giant tits and a bag of dicks.
Welcome to Dollywood.
When you get to Dollywood,
do you walk in through a giant pair of tits?
That'd be a great entrance to the park.
I love that.
Yeah, I want to go there.
They got a new roller coaster
that's supposed to be really...
It's based on the movie 9 to 5.
What's the pattern of the roller coaster?
Is it shaped like Dabney Coleman?
Yeah. Everyone sits in desk chairs that have rollers on them.
Right.
And then you get the best little whorehouse in Texas funnel cakes.
It's really, really good.
Straight talk!
I have it on Laserdisc!
You so regret giving that answer, don't you?
I'm sorry!
He knows his shit, is what he said.
Yeah, I mean,
any respectable newsie's gonna know that Dolly
Parton was in straight talk do you like the way he posed that though Dolly Parton trivia I will
fuck you up yeah I've got a hat on and what is your name tag say oh he's gonna hand it to me
and your name
oh your name is Ken
so you took something that said
Korean gore police
Tokyo
sorry
racist
and she
Tokyo Korea whatever
close enough
so it's Ken gore police now Tokyo, Korea, whatever. Close enough. Yeah.
So it's Ken Gore police now instead of Korea.
Korean.
I don't see any of the four guys eyeing that like they're going to pick it.
Not when your lady's got all Starburst on hers.
She spelled out Kim with Starburst.
Oh.
And coincidentally, the M is my favorite flavor.
She didn't even fuck with the green ones.
Green ones?
They don't have green.
There's only three Starburst flavors?
No, there are green Starbursts.
What's the fourth one?
Yellow, orange, red?
Lime. Pink. Lime. Aren't they lime, the green Starburst flavors? No, there are green Starbursts. What's the fourth one? Yellow, orange, red?
Lime.
Pink.
Lime.
Aren't they lime, the green Starbursts? But that's in one of the weird offshoot Starbursts.
Yeah, what wah-wah are you going to?
I just thought lime would be the obvious.
It's a tropical shit.
Okay, so there was a sad news about Tony Scott
did you talk about him this morning
of course you did
we're topical people
but also dudes listen and what dude doesn't
fucking love Tony Scott movies
I think True Romance
is my favorite
that's a great movie
Quentin Tarantino script
and realization it's just a badass movie from beginning to end.
And the Tony Scott visual style jumped out.
You could always tell his films.
And I think the guy, Ridley is always, and Ridley's phenomenal,
but he's always given the little extra critical favoritism.
But Tony Scott was every bit the director.
I think it was a phenomenal job.
Oh, yeah.
I just think Tony Scott just kind of stuck more to movies
that are fun to watch,
and Ridley Scott got more serious about shit,
and so he got some awards and stuff,
but I don't necessarily think he's better.
I think they're brothers that are both good.
They both came from the world of commercials,
and they were just visually both incredibly adept at it,
but it was sad to hear that and he jumped.
Apparently, people who saw him jump,
he just resolutely went right over
the edge of the road. Very determined, but the story
is that maybe he was
diagnosed with brain cancer
and they said it was inoperable, but
what about a second opinion?
Exactly, yeah.
No.
So you're saying
He just got the text
And just went
Fuck it
And jumped over
I'm just saying
You know maybe
You know like
When they told Tom Hanks
He had a brain cloud
In Joe vs. the Volcano
It's a good thing
He didn't jump into
That volcano
That would make it
More tragic
He did jump into it
Actually
Spoiler alert
Yeah
Yeah and he got spit back out.
Yeah.
Which I hope is what happens,
because I'm going to jump into a volcano.
But yeah, I didn't mean to make light
of what happened to him,
but it's definitely a sad story,
and also I wanted to go down the line
and see, do you guys all disagree
that True Romance is his best film?
I think it is, yeah.
Yeah, Sam Levine says True Romance.
Let me just mark that down.
Go ahead, mark it down.
You know, I would say, obviously, I think True Romance,
but even like Days of Thunder,
which I know is just sort of this Tom Cruise fluff film,
there's still awesome stuff in it.
There's really cool action in it,
and yeah, it's sort of formulaic,
but Robert Duvall's great in there.
Yeah, in most of his his movies he's great with action
but didn't do that didn't take it to
that Michael Bay level of
it all moving too fast and being too
you know cutting every
couple seconds there was always the action
was always kind of really cool and you could see
it and he just made good
entertaining movies I was talking for Crimson Tide
I don't know why Crimson Tide is really good
yeah definitely top two submarine movies right there yeah entertaining movies. I was just talking for Crimson Tide. I don't know why. Crimson Tide is really good.
Definitely top two submarine movies right there.
Yeah.
Das Boot and
Crimson Tide.
Not over at October?
Over at October, dude.
That's number three. Number three? No.
A Periscope.
A Periscope. We have a winner.
Yosef forgot.
I believe it's Down Periscope. It's Down Periscope. A periscope. We have a winner. Yosef forgot one side of the team.
I believe it's down periscope.
It's down periscope.
You're right.
It's down periscope.
It's down periscope.
Shame on you.
Yeah.
You must shave your little Wolverine beard as penance.
Yeah, down periscope.
Toby Huss.
Starring Patton Oswalt as well.
He has like two lines.
Your comic friends.
Yes, yes.
And so everybody voted.
So we're calling it.
The one that I enjoy the most,
I think True Romance is this best,
but the movie that I just enjoy the most
for I don't know what reason,
I've got a few reasons,
is The Last Boy Scout.
Because it was one of the first movies
where two guys that are cops
started saying
these kinds of movies are stupid.
They kind of started making fun of it
within the movie.
There's a lot of jokes
about those kinds of movies,
but it also had great action
and some fucked up shit happened.
And then the daughter
who had the filthy mouth,
Danielle Harris,
was that her name,
who was telling them
to fuck off all the time?
Yeah, but there was some good double crosses was telling them fuck off all the time. But there were some good
double crosses and scenes where they
and Halle Berry is a stripper.
Yeah, yeah.
Win, win, win.
So yeah, so
I'm sure everybody's already going to do this without me
saying it, but check out some Tony
Scott films and just
sit there and cry.
Scott films and just sit there and cry.
In the world of cinema, Sam, even though you're here shooting a TV show, have you had a chance to see any films lately?
Yeah, I just saw the campaign.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Like?
I did.
It's very funny.
It's very funny.
Yeah.
I think the thing that's kind of holding it back
is some people are just like,
oh, it's so right about how shitty our system is right now.
The whole movie is just about how people can buy elections.
So it's depressing.
But also, the thing I liked about the movie,
and I thought was also, I don't know how I feel about it,
but almost every scene worked as a standalone sketch
where it's like they're taking typical politician-type people
and then putting them in this situation,
and you would expect to see that on SNL.
It is kind of a series of scenarios,
but some of them are so goddamn funny.
Are very, very, very funny.
Zach's kids.
Oh, yeah.
The scene where they're all confessing things
is so ridiculous. And the scene where they're all confessing things. That's amazing.
It's so ridiculous.
And the scene where the little fat kid is sitting on Zach's lap.
Yes.
And that's hilarious, too.
But I will say this.
Dylan McDermott steals that fucking movie.
Okay, there's an opinion.
Okay.
No, you're wrong.
You're wrong.
No, I'm sorry.
Dylan McDermott, who is not typically a comedic actor.
Yeah, and his part, he plays it very straight,
and so that makes it funny.
Yes, but I think he held his own to a tremendous degree.
Oh, sure, absolutely.
Was this the funniest film he's done since Steel Magnolias?
Actually, it's the funniest film he's done since Runaway Jury.
Runaway Jury.
There we go.
That's right, fuckers. He dies in the first 30 seconds. It's a nice pull. It's a funniest film he's done since Runaway Jury. That's right, fuckers.
He dies in the first 30 seconds.
It's a nice pull. It's a nice pull.
You could do this thing solo.
Graham, have you been anything lately?
I saw Total Recall.
And yeah, that is the reaction.
It's just it.
Wow.
You don't cheer,
you don't boo,
you just go,
oh, okay.
That was it.
There was nothing,
I mean, it didn't.
It's like they took
an Arnold Schwarzenegger,
I haven't seen it.
They took,
they took a dumb
Arnold Schwarzenegger movie
and said,
let's take out
the smart parts.
I mean, there's scenes in there that are beat for beat.
I'm like, oh, I know what's going to happen here
because they're doing it exactly like the one from 20 years ago.
So, I mean, the original, if you go back and watch it,
there's all this shit that doesn't hold up.
Yeah, and this one doesn't have the...
It's got Kate Beckinsale kicking ass.
She has become this badass,
and there's a couple of fight scenes
where she's just thumping Colin Farrell's ass.
Does Jessica Biel play Quatto?
Yeah.
Because then I would see it.
That'd be cool.
Sure.
Okay, let's go after the show.
Yeah, let's do it.
Is Quatto the prostitute with three boobs?
No.
No, Quatto grew out of the belly.
Oh, Jesus.
Quaid.
Yeah, yeah.
Start the reactor.
Quaid, I'm marrying Justin Timberlake.
Quaid, I was in stealth.
I was in stealth I was in stealth
That's what they're bragging about
I was in stealth
The shitty movie about a crazy plane
Yeah let's make an action movie
And name it after a thing
That you can't see
Let's sneak this one into theaters
Stealth goes protocol
Preston
I don't get out to too many movies
I have three kids
So I'm either going to see kids movies
Or wait until whatever comes out on DVD
Or watch it on cable
How was The Hunger Games? Oh Jesus Yeah that just came out I'm either going to see kids movies or wait until whatever comes out on DVD or watch it on cable. But the one.
How was The Hunger Games?
Oh, Jesus.
Yeah, that just came out, didn't it?
Yeah.
It was on DVD.
No, you know what?
And you'll probably give me shit about this, but I fucking love this movie.
And it was The Three Stooges.
I don't know why, but I just.
Wow, that's the total recall of comedy. I'm telling you, man.
I don't know what it was.
You know, my kids love it,
and I was able to watch it with them,
and then they started beating the shit out of each other
right after we watched it, so it was hilarious.
And it's...
But it's like...
It takes place now, though, right?
Yeah, but what they didn't do is they didn't...
They didn't kind of Brady Bunch movie it
where they were just these oddball weirdos out of place.
Some of the surrounding characters
were a little bit slapstick as well.
And Sofia Vergara and stuff like that.
So, I mean, I don't know.
It was just, it kind of, it was nostalgic for me
and I found it funny.
You're not alone in thinking that it's,
I've heard lots of people say it's funny.
I still haven't, you know, fallen for it.
But I might watch it at some point.
Because I, you know, because the old Three Stooges, they made me laugh sometimes.
Sometimes it's a little too violent.
I don't like when
Curly gets, or Mo,
or the
other one.
I don't like when they take a saw
and run it across the top of their head.
That seems like that would really hurt
a lot. Just a little.
Seems a lot worse than a quick poke in the eye.
Freaks me out.
And then, Steve?
A movie I just saw that I friggin' loved
is The Raid Redemption.
Yes!
Great movie.
It's just unbelievable.
I mean, you know,
one of the best action movies I've ever seen. I mean, and the visceral It's just unbelievable. I mean, you know, one of the best action movies I've ever seen.
I mean, and the visceral shit is just unbelievable.
Yeah, I've been raving about it for a while now.
And now that it's out and everybody can see it, because, you know, theatrically it didn't play everywhere.
But now that it's out on video on demand and DVD. Blu-ray has tons of additional.
I mean, those scenes are so brilliantly choreographed and
just the way they capture a lot of that stuff on a limited
budget is amazing. If you haven't seen it,
definitely check it out. The fight
choreography is that alone.
Just watch that. The dude just cutting everyone
cutting them to shit is just amazing.
Yeah, no one's ever said
to me, I watched Raid Redemption.
I didn't see it. I don't know
what you're raving about. No one has said that. And they say that about anything you rave about. Somebody's going to be like, i don't get it i didn't see it i didn't i don't know what you're raving about no one has said that and they say that about anything you rave about somebody's
gonna be like i don't agree right but everybody loves the raid and uh i do too uh have i seen
any movies lately no too busy talking about movies to see movies. Oh, we're running a little behind schedule, so let's get...
Does anybody hunger for games?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Not yet.
Settle down.
Save your arm.
That sign looks heavy.
Yeah.
Had lights on it.
Sam is the one who brought the Hunger Games book.
Could you tell?
And signed it for you guys.
And I also got Preston and Steve
to sign that Philadelphia magazine.
Because they've both got Philadelphia style.
Yeah.
They're both backstage going,
Doug didn't fucking tell us.
We have a shit ton of swag at their stand.
We could have brought tons of really good stuff.
I told Casey, boy.
Oh, well, there you go.
Who was angling to be a guest on the show.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah, yeah.
And I thank God Sam Levine was available.
Oh, boy.
Because I would have called him in.
Yeah.
He actually be good.
I'm sure he'd be good at the,
he knows his stuff probably.
He knows movies pretty well.
Yeah, yeah.
He's a good guy.
And I also should mention
that I told him to tell you
to bring stuff about 20 minutes ago.
I texted him from my seat right here
while the show was going,
hey, could you tell those guys
to bring some swag?
But fortunately with the Garfunkel notes stuff you got a whole whole box full of
box full of shit oh and that's right that's right we have the will will throw
in a sit-in on the Preston Steve show yeah where you get to go come and hang
you get to go and sit there you get to be You get to be kind of near.
Don't you always have a hottie camera?
We have hottie and peep stars like Wayne Brady.
Wayne Brady will come in and be a dick to you.
Yeah.
Michael Winslow will refuse to do noises.
It'll be great.
Did that really happen?
That really happened.
Oh, no. It's like, schmuck, you're known for one goddamn thing.
It's it.
We're not here because of your hamlet in the park.
It's because you can make a sound like a megaphone.
Fucking do it.
I'd like to see his hamlet in the park.
To be or not to be.
Is that a squirrel I see?
Oh.
We were working in an improv Graham and I and we watched some of his set
because he was the later show that night.
We did the 420 and he did the 8
and 10 and we watched one
of his shows and he shows
footage from Star Wars and does all
the noises. Is it good? And it's amazing.
It's amazing. It's fucking
amazing. It's not funny but it is
but I understand because sound effects don't really work in the medium of radio
but I mean if he's doing something that it's like it'd be like him going up on stage and
pasteurizing milk it's like we have machines that can do that. I mean, for all I know, he just threw on a scene from Star Wars
and stood next to it pretending to make all the noises.
Let's play ABCD's Nuts.
You guys have played this, right?
Yes.
Graham's played it.
We normally go through the alphabet.
We take turns.
Each person in line, we go in order,
and has to take the next letter of the alphabet
and name a movie that starts with that letter. And it's kind of a speed thing. I don't give you a lot of time to think about it. All right. But we're not going to take the next letter of the alphabet and name a movie that starts with that letter.
And it's kind of a speed thing.
I don't give you a lot of time to think about it.
But we're not going to do the alphabet today.
I like to change it up a little bit.
Oh, fuck.
Today, we are going to spell out, in honor of Sam, the man being here, we're going to
spell out Freaks and Geeks.
Okay.
And for each movie, I have-selected a title I just chose something at random that came into my head and if someone matches they
automatically win so if you match and it's happened once before there was a
match and it was very exciting okay so we'll start with you, Sam.
You name any movie that begins with the letter F.
Fargo.
That's what I said!
Oh!
Doug is shrugging it off.
Oh, God damn it.
That's not what he said.
That's not what I said.
No, no.
But that was fun.
I'm going to do that every time.
Every time.
Because nobody that is on the podcast
listens to the podcast.
Everyone will fall for it.
I said Fast Times at Ridgemont High.
Graham, you get the letter R.
Run, Ronnie, run.
Nicely done.
I said Revenge.
Directed by Tony Scott.
E goes to Preston.
Ever After.
Straight Talk is excited.
Straight Talk, sweetie.
Finally, a Drew Barrymore film!
I chose Enemy of the State,
another Tony Scott film.
There we go.
A for Steve.
A, Alone in the Dark.
It was on cable last night.
Hey, however you get it done.
Google TV.
I thought of this movie, I thought of Annie,
probably because Jay-Z is doing a remake of Annie.
And that sounds interesting.
Back to you, Sam, with the letter K.
Kissing a fool.
Okay.
The David Schwimmer, Jason Lee epic?
No.
No?
What was the name of the lady in that?
Right?
She hasn't been in anything else, really, I don't think.
But Bonnie Hunts in that movie?
She seems like a nice lady, though.
Bonnie Hunts? I went with Kill Bill, volume one.
S for
Graham. Shakes the Clown.
I said Saturday Night Fever.
Okay, and
Preston gets a movie that begins
with the word and.
That begins with the word and?
That's correct. Wow!
We're curveballing the rules tonight.
Freaks and geeks.
Wouldn't it be A?
And justice for all.
That's the one.
That's correct.
Boom.
Nicely done.
Nicely done.
Nice.
See, I told you we match sometimes.
Woo, sister.
Yeah. See, I told you we match sometimes. Yeah!
Extra, extra, read all about it.
Newsy gets a high five at the early show on a Monday night.
Nobody's buying my papes.
The newsies call them papes.
Kind of sound a little bit like Bane.
Yeah.
Extra, extra.
Get your moves right here from evil.
23 Skadoo, you have my permission to die.
Not bad.
Mine was a little more Sean Connery. Sean Connery, Bane.
Miss Moneypenny, I'm gonna crash this plane
and everyone's going to die.
I have a craving
for a lime starburst.
So glad he came out of retirement
to do that part.
Remember, Batman, we come from the planet Zeist. Remember Batman
We come from the planet Zeist
Obscure Highlander callback
Highlander 2
Horrible sequel
They're making a new Highlander I think
Oh yeah
Are they doing a reboot of that?
So there isn't only one
What?
It's a full reboot of the...
I think they're rebooting it.
Well, that's a good idea.
The first one was awesome.
Boo!
It was good.
I don't like Christopher Lambert.
They're remaking it with...
What's the American Idol guy's name
Adam Lambert
just fucking say it Newsy
don't look down in shame
you know it
Adam Lambert is the Highlander
so you're gonna go to this guy for everything
just like,
who's the head writer on Glee?
He's just sitting there going,
I told you I didn't want to sit in the front.
I fucking told you.
No, he knew to get those starbursts close to us.
Let's play build a title.
Let it in there.
I remember the original title of our show was Freaks and...
He matched.
Justice Fromm matched, so he was the automatic winner.
Oh, I see.
Yeah.
Those are the rules.
And all he wins is he gets to go first in this next game that he doesn't know how to play.
Great.
So I don't know how much of a prize
it is.
It's not one of the better prizes.
Okay, so
as suggested by... Oh, let me tell you how it works.
We might have been playing this game the last time we were here.
It's possible.
We start with a title.
Like, for instance, this is my example I always use.
If it was The Godfather, we'd lose the the.
We call it Godfather.
And you have to add a title to the beginning or the end of another existing movie.
So you could go like, Oh, Godfather or God or God, Father of the Bride, like that.
All right.
And we just keep building on it like that, and it gets very difficult.
And don't feel bad if you don't do good at it.
All right.
Because there's nothing at stake.
We've been up since 350, so.
Do you use that excuse for everything that happens?
Every fucking thing.
All day, every day?
Everything.
Even on the weekends.
Yeah. Okay. All day, every day Everything Even on the weekends Yeah Okay, so
The first title we're going to start with
And Preston gets to start
Is Amber Pierce on Twitter suggested
The Last Picture Show
So you need something that ends with the word last
Or begins with the word show
I can add to the beginning or end of this?
Yeah.
You can go either way.
God, I remember this game.
We really fucked this up last time we were here, too.
Could be like show something or something, something last.
Oh, you're going to love this.
Can I say last picture showgirls?
Yes.
Yes, you may.
Now we go to Steve.
And you have to add to that.
I have to add to
Last Picture Showgirls.
The last...
And it has to be
at the beginning or the end.
Yeah, so...
I'm fucked.
So your next title
could start with girls.
Okay.
Or end with last.
The last picture show girls just want to have fun.
Nice.
And of course, I should explain that it doesn't have to be,
you can also use like a syllable if it's a sound alike
and all the judging is done by me.
So it gets very...
We're getting into some arguments.
The last picture show girls just want to have fun with Dick and Jane.
Nice.
I mean, that's just true.
It is true.
It is true.
Girls just want to have fun with Dick.
And Jane.
All right, Grams.
You've got Last Picture Show Girls
just want to have fun with Dick and Jane.
Last Picture Show Girls
what is it?
Fun with Dick and...
Just want to have fun with Dick and...
Jane.
And Jane Ear.
How do you spell that?
E-A-R?
Ear.
I-R.
Whatever.
How do you spell it?
He's read it a few times.
It's a classic love story.
Jane I-R.
Whatever.
E-Y-R-E.
Mm-hmm.
Air.
Air.
Fucking.
I'm an English major.
Yeah.
It's actually very helpful because air is easier to add on than ear would be.
All right.
The last picture showgirls just want to have fun with Dick and Jane
air bud.
So it can sound alike
because.
All right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Holy fuck.
All right.
Oh I got one.
But it's on you Steve.
Yeah.
And I am I. I'm taking that as comfort.
Last picture show, girls just want to have fun
with Dick and Jane Air Bud.
Air Bud.
Air Bud, go.
God damn it.
I'm drawing a blank.
All right.
You guys are helping each other?
He's sharing a microphone and a brain.
Jane Eyre Bud.
I'm not getting anything.
All right, you're out.
I'm out.
It's all right.
Jane Eyre Buddy.
The Gorilla Movie with Rene Russo.
Thank you very much.
It's cheap, but I'll take it.
I was thinking
Buddy Holly story would be good.
That's what I was going to say.
Yeah.
Okay, so Graham,
what do you got, buddy?
We had a blast.
It's a spring break movie from the early 80s.
Who's in it, Chris?
Nope, that's it.
That's official.
We had a blast.
Yep, so we had a blast.
Jane Eyre, blah, blah, blah, buddy.
All right.
All right, who's next?
Moving on.
All right. I'm going gonna let the Newsy decide can can you remember that move that's not a
movie is that movie right I think what's your name yeah no you don't Lee majors Lee Majors played the lifeguard.
Extra, extra, get your information that might be true.
After all the shit he said to you, you're going to back him up on that?
Yeah, he started it.
All right, I got one.
All right, so Graham's out. We had a blast.
No, Graham's out.
Oh, you're out?
Yeah, that doesn't count.
Fuck.
I thought of one. You thought of something? What did we end up? We had a blast. Yeah. No, Graham's out. He's out. Oh, you're out? Yeah, that doesn't count. Fuck. That's bull.
I thought of one.
You thought of something
that ends in we?
Is it French?
Buddy.
Yeah, Buddy.
Buddy.
Jane Eyre Buddy.
Wait a minute.
Well, yeah.
Buddy Holly story.
That's right.
Fuck.
I'm like, shit,
I could just...
Yeah. I said it Graham
and then you did that other thing
I totally blew it
when I said it out loud
I gotta yell at myself to not yell out answers
I guess I'm the only Lee Majors
Spring Break movie fan
whatever
I thought there were film fans here but I guess I was wrong I guess I'm all alone major spring break movie fan. Yeah. Whatever.
I thought there were film fans here,
but I guess I was wrong.
I guess I'm all alone.
Okay, it's just between Sam and Preston now. Buddy Holly's story of us.
Story of us.
This is where it gets super ugly.
Bruce Willis, Michelle Pfeiffer divorce movie.
That's what that was, yes.
Yeah.
And Lee Majors Was the security guard
Was Tawny Katane
In that one
Yes
I think right
Yeah we had a blast
And Tawny Katane
Fell in love with
Right
Yeah
It was a forbidden romance
Because she couldn't
Go into the ocean
Yeah
Yeah
He is his dad
On the resort
I remember this one
They showed it on my flight
On the way in today.
Look it up.
Forgotten favorite.
You got anything, Preston?
All right, so what do we end with here?
Us.
Us.
Question.
We've been in this corner before.
At the beginning, do we have to go with the?
Does that word have to be in there for the last picture,
or is it just last picture?
No, the the's gone.
You just have to go with last.
I don't know any movies that end with the word last, but I did think of one that uses part of the word last.
Part of the word last?
So did I.
Bullshit.
Such bullshit.
Fucking wrong.
Oh, we did have a blast.
All right.
Man, I'm drawing a blank.
It's a tough one.
Is Us and Them a movie?
I don't know.
I'm just guessing, folks.
I'm going to tell you how to sell a fake movie title.
Us and Them.
It's all how you do it. You just got to go, fake movie title. Us and Them. It's all how you do it.
You just got to go, oh, yeah, Us and Them.
Yeah, that's it.
How many times have I fallen for that?
More than you know.
I always make you say who's in it and stuff like that.
Lee Majors is in it and stuff like that. I'm trying to look...
Lee Majors is in it.
What the fuck?
Us and them.
I'm typing it in.
Sam's saying no.
If Leonard doesn't say it's a thing, it's not a thing.
Here we go.
No results.
I would have... Here we go. No results.
I would have, you know, and again, I got to sit down and pick the title myself, so it was easier for me.
But you could have gone X-Men First Classed Picture Show.
Oh.
Yeah, yeah.
Tricky.
Or just the movie Class. You could just add a C to the beginning.
All right, so that means that Sam and the Ma'am is our winner.
How about it?
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
And that also means that we are now moving on to the Leonard Maltin game.
Oh, my God.
Get your bags of dicks out.
There are dolls over there.
More dolls.
Let's take a look.
Oh, there's a penis over there.
So many elves.
There's a dick, actually.
All right, just go grab
the one you want to play for.
the one you want to play for.
Yelling!
Yelling!
All right.
Oh, Preston picked the other elf.
That movie cake.
Both of them, bring all those cakes up here.
You're going to play for two people?
Well, it's one big cake.
Oh, okay.
What's that?
Oh, shit.
That guy has bacon.
You got a plate with bacon on it?
Son of a bitch.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is amazing.
Look at all those cakes.
You're really the ace of cakes, Scram.
So one of the cakes is a camera.
It's your logo.
Yeah, and you guys sitting in these front tables
that he's putting the cakes on,
you can go ahead and have some.
It's your logo.
I know, I know.
Yeah.
Doug loves cakes.
All right, put the cakes down.
I know it's my logo.
I just said Doug loves cakes.
Doug, do you know your own logo?
Have you seen your own show?
Plus, that first one doesn't look like my face.
It's your names. It's your names.
Kelly and Courtney.
Part cameras.
Right, so Kelly and Courtney gave Doug a facial,
and they love movies.
All right.
Kelly and what?
Is this vegan and gluten-free, this cake?
Oh, fucking take it back.
I'm just kidding.
I'm just kidding.
Okay, right here.
Well, I'll eat those treats.
She brought you some gluten-free shit over there, Graham.
Thank you.
Oh, sure, I'll eat them.
Thank you so much.
He's not going to play for you.
No, but these are all, I'll eat the shit out of these.
He's going to eat your box of gluten-free dicks. much he's not gonna play for you but these are all I'll eat the shit out of
your box of gluten-free dicks straight talk he just keeps shaking his head now
he's like fuck this guy I was on board with that Lee major spring break movie but this is bullshit um okay so it's kelly and what courtney okay so gram is playing
for kelly and courtney and uh sam is playing for someone named joel yep who made a sign says joel
loves doug loves movies normally you know i normally pick the person who put the least amount
of effort into their name tag unfortunately i messed I messed up. There was some guy, I didn't see it until after I picked, who just scrawled words
pen on like a paper plate. Sorry, buddy. I'll get you next time.
But in the meantime, this will have to do. This is my logo!
It's your logo.
But you can't eat that one
Is there weed in the cakes?
That'd be a lot of weed
Those are big cakes
Sweet Jesus
Okay and then Gadzooks
Is an expression from Preston and Steve
Show
Yeah that comes from Jess who made this sign
Okay Jess made a big Gadzooks sign
So smart play, Jess.
She also wrote ball sacks are yummy on here, too.
That's something you say on the show?
Yeah.
Okay.
Well, I was hoping it was.
She's just like, this is what I like to eat.
She's just like...
No, it was Casey.
From time to time, he'll write down a note for something that he's online. he is online, he finds or something like that while we're busy talking about something else.
He hands me a note, and it just said, ball sacks are yummy.
And I go, hey, gang, Casey just handed me a note, and it said, and I paused, ball sacks are yummy.
And right as it left my mouth, I'm like, holy shit.
They recorded that, and they've got it forever now.
And they play it all the fucking time so you
know wait we'll be getting ready to you know to introduce somebody a guest on
the show you know we have the mayor of Philadelphia ladies and gentlemen that
Steve will hit it ball sacks are yummy and it sounds silky smooth as if I said
it so thank you Jess nice job Jess andess and uh steve who are you uh you got the other one of the alfs
yeah this is a loin the other guy with an alf is what are the other oh alf cage match
i could just see that guy walking down the streets of philadelphia i'm gonna win tonight in tonight. I've got an elf phone. You were like, there's no way
anyone will ever,
ever have this better.
And she just said, front row was like, boom.
Well, I
jumped on it because said
producer Casey is a huge elf fan.
So this is in honor of Casey.
But why didn't you guys just call each other
on your elf phones
and decide
which one of you
is going to bring it?
Oh, God.
All right.
Well, we have to play
the Leonard Maltin game.
We have to do it.
And we have to do it,
but not, you know. Those vegan treats are delicious, by the way. Thank you. Oh, you already... We have to do it. And we have to do it.
Those vegan treats are delicious, by the way.
Thank you.
You already put one of those vegan dicks in your mouth?
Yeah.
Ball sacks are yummy.
And now we've got you saying it.
If we did drops on this show, I would totally... Okay.
So Sam gets to go first,
and then what order were we going in
when we were playing before?
We came around that way,
so we'll go back around the other way.
So we'll go next to Steve,
and then Preston, and then Graham.
All right.
And Sam gets to pick a category.
Would you like...
Oh, boy.
Oh, oh! Would you like Would you like
Baby It's Cold Inside
That's movies where
someone for some reason is inside
a refrigerator
Wow
Okay
Alright
At Wilbur the Cat suggested...
Oh, did we do this one last night?
We did do this one last night.
I'm sorry.
So I'm going to have to skip that one.
But it was Willem the Foe.
And it's movies where Willem the Foe plays a bad guy.
Most of them, then?
Yeah, I think the only one he didn't is Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou.
It's Amy Adams' birthday today.
Actress Amy Adams.
Holy shit.
So the films of Amy Adams.
Or, for your third choice, The Bjorn Legacy.
And that's movies that have ABBA songs in them.
Wow.
Good.
Wow.
Good category.
I will go with the first category.
Fridge.
Fridge.
Someone's inside a fridge for some reason.
What? It's
preposterous, but it happens. Yeah.
There's several examples,
but this is one of them.
Three and a half stars from Leonard.
Yeah.
The year is 2006.
Uh-huh. And he
says about this movie
that the opening
is slam bang.
And that he also says that it has an eye-filling finale.
So I'm not going to tell you anything about the middle of the movie.
But the opening slam bang has an eye-opening finale.
And then he lists eight names.
How many names you didn't get it in?
Negative one.
Sam the Man.
And I always say this.
I could very easily be wrong.
If that negative name is Lee Majors.
I'm going to bet you're right on this.
I have a good feeling.
Yeah, I think I know it too.
Oh, so now you know how negative names works, right?
Yes.
If you go negative two,
you have to name the top two billed performers in the movie in order.
I'll go, or you make Sam name it.
Or you could say, Sam, name it.
Hope he wasn't lying with that.
I might be wrong. Should I do it? Should I be or you could say Sam name it hope hope he wasn't lying with that I might be wrong should I do it should I be I'll go negative two
negative two I may go down in flames with this but I'm gonna try okay so then
we go to Preston who's just sitting there no No, fuck that. Name it.
Alright, so what's the name of the film?
Is it
Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull?
Be more specific.
Doug is generous tonight.
Oh, you think I should just say no, you're wrong? Doug is generous tonight.
Oh, you think I should just say no, you're wrong?
To whoever did that earlier.
Did somebody say the answer?
I didn't hear it.
Sam doesn't like it when people say the answer.
Indiana Jones.
There's more names in the title?
More words?
Well, you know, like Alex Trebek would probably say be more specific if it was the first round of Jeopardy.
Maybe.
Kingdom? Indiana Jones and the Kingdom
of the Crystal Skull? That's correct.
But now...
Now I'm fucked.
Top two build people.
Who's the number one build person? Harrison Ford.
Okay, and then who's number two?
Shia LaBeouf. It's Cate Blanchett!
I tried!
There's no way that was 2006.
That was 2009.
No.
No, it wasn't 2009.
Eight, eight, eight, eight, eight.
I apologize.
And that's Nell and Boyd.
I was going with the 2006 version.
Where Shia LaBeouf is second building.
It had not been signed yet.
Yeah, I didn't see it right because I haven't taken my glaucoma
medicine
in over nine, it's almost been
90 minutes now.
I've got to start playing some
venues where they allow you to medicate during the show.
I can do
much better. Alright, so
that means that Preston has a point.
Nice.
He is on the board.
And since he challenged Steve, we'll start with Graham and then go to Preston.
And Graham gets to pick a category.
Would you like King of Pancakes category, the number one movie,
10 years ago
to this very day
at the
North American
box office
or
in theaters
ciao
and that's
films that are set
in Italy
or
or
West Side Story
and that's films
that have
either jets or sharks in them.
Brilliant.
Brilliant.
I will go jets and sharks.
All right.
This movie from 1982.
Making sure I'm reading it right this time.
One and a half stars from Leonard.
He calls this movie lamentably dull.
And he also calls it slow moving.
That to me is really just hitting it over the head with a bag of dicks.
He also calls it a yarn.
Which you don't hear that enough anymore
that movie was a yarn it's like a big ball that a cat played with
and he also says about this movie that uh what does that mean
he says someone in it won the Charles Layton Award for eccentric performances.
I do not believe that's a real award.
I believe that is some of the magical Leonard Maltin sarcasm.
Charles Lawton, I'm sorry, yeah.
I said Layton.
It's not even spelled like that.
Charles Lawton Award for eccentric performances
by one of the cast members.
And Leonard lists eight names.
How many names do you think you can get it in?
Graham Elwood.
Six.
Hmm.
Hmm.
Hmm.
I'll try five.
Are we going the other way?
Switching it up, yeah.
Steve?
Preston says five.
Name that.
All right.
All right.
So?
86? 82. 82, I'm sorry. All right. All right. So. 86?
82.
82.
I'm sorry.
All right.
Could be 86.
We'll find out later.
It's a span of years.
Once we say the name, everyone will tell me what the year was.
Ballpark it.
Here's your five names.
Do you want the clues again?
Nah.
They don't help.
Nope.
Here's your five names.
Do you want the clues again?
Nah.
They don't help.
Nope.
Your five names are John Ratzenberger,
Nigel Hawthorne,
Stefan Schnabel,
the great Stefan Schnabel,
Ronald Lacey,
and Warren Clark.
Those are your five out of eight names.
Wow.
And yeah, and the year is 82 and it has a shark
or a jet in it.
And one and a half,
one and a half stars
from Leonard.
Clearly an epic.
So,
it's a yarn.
So,
give me those first two names
you read again.
It's John Ratzenberger.
Ratzenberger,
Cliff from Cheers
and Nigel Hawthorne.
No, it was Nor,
or yeah, Cliff from Cheers and Nigel Hawthorne. No, it was Nor... Oh, yeah, Cliff from Cheers and Nigel.
Yeah, if it's not springing into your head,
if you're not thinking of any shark or jet movies...
She could pull a Sarah Silverman.
She?
He could pull a Sarah Silverman.
It could happen.
God.
We had a blast.
Indeed.
No, it's not we had a blast There was a shark and we had a blast though
Yeah Lee Majors finger blasts a
A shark
Yeah
I can't think of any movie with a shark or a jet
that would be considered a yarn.
And I just, I'm drawing a blank.
Shit, I don't know.
Iron Eagle.
That's the only jet I can think of right now.
Okay, fair enough.
The other names are David Huffman,
Freddie Jones was the eccentric performance,
and then the lead actor is a gentleman that goes by the name
of Clint Eastwood.
And he flew around in a thing called
Firefox.
Firefox. Yeah, that was a tough
one. So that means that Preston
and Steve are both on the board.
They both have a point.
We have nothing, Graham.
Meh.
I kind of liked it, Firefox.
It was interesting. For the time, it had pretty decent
CGI.
It's a piece of shit.
It was lamentably
dull. The whole time, Leonard was like,
oh, I feel so bad about how dull this is.
But has anybody
here seen Fox Fire?
The Angelina Jolie
Hedy Burris?
Yeah.
Parts of it.
Parts of it.
That's all you need to see of that movie is parts of it.
You only saw parts of Angelina Jolie.
Okay, so that means that we're going to start this time with Sam.
And then cruise around back towards Steve.
And Sam gets to pick a category.
Nobody.
Would you like?
You know I'm a big fan of the movie Windy City Heat.
I know you are.
So movies with either Windy City or Heat in the title.
Okay.
Same name.
That's a movie where it was made two different movies that are completely different from each other but have the exact same name.
Got it.
Or a very similar name for sure.
And then your third choice
is Yabba Dabba Don't.
And that's cartoons turned into a live action movie.
Oh, boy.
Yeah.
Which one of those would you like to do?
Oh, wow.
Windy City Heat
Yabba Dabba Don't
Same name
I'm going to go with Windy City Heat
For you
I've never heard the audience
More disappointed
In a category choice
Yabba Dabba Don't
Was clearly the one you wanted, right?
Yeah, I know.
But I'm the villain, so I can't do what the crowd wants.
I'm going to advise you
not to check out that show he's doing.
Thank you, Joel.
Joel is happy.
Joel loves Sam's choice.
Doug loves movies.
Yeah.
Okay, Sam, 1994 Doug loves movies. Yeah. Okay, Sam.
1994 is the year.
Two and a half.
Is this a weightlifting competition?
It's a hammer throw.
Two and a half stars, 1994.
These are movies that have the same title.
No.
No, this is Windy City or Heat is in the title.
Oh.
But they both have Lee Majors.
Contrived is what Leonard calls this film.
He also says it has a lot of genuine laughs.
And scenery.
He says it's got scenery in it.
It's not one of those movies that takes place in one room.
Right.
And there are ten names listed.
How many names did you get in, Sam?
Nine names.
It's a quality opening bit.
Amateurs in the audience.
What year was it?
The year is 94.
Has either wind or heat in it.
Sam started with nine names.
I can name that in seven names.
Yeah, lucky seven. Seven names. All right.
Yeah, lucky seven.
You can only be so serious a game player
when you have an Alphone in your hands.
When you have the wrong Alphone
in your hands.
Ring, ring. Sorry, wrong Al phone in your hands. Ring, ring.
Sorry, wrong Al phone.
I'm going to ask Steve to name that one.
All right.
Sorry, Joel.
Got boxed out.
Yeah, that happens sometimes.
Even the best players can be...
See, guys, that's why I kept the bidding so high.
See that, guys?
So that it would hang on ground
and then we could keep the game going.
Yeah.
It's all good.
I like the game ending.
Yeah, you got to get out of here.
I feel pretty good about it.
You got to get really fucked up
before your show tonight. Yeah, I got to do a stand-up show good about it Yeah, I gotta do another show tonight
Gotta do a stand-up show later
Okay, so how many names do you get?
Seven
Okay, here's your seven names
And congratulations to either Preston or Steve
Joel, did you write a shithead on the back of this?
I got one
You got one? Okay
I got one
I got all kinds of shitheads up in this motherfucker.
Did you write a shithead on the back of this, Kelly and Courtney?
Yeah, the other side of the cake.
The other side of the cake.
Yeah.
Did you scribble a shithead on the bottom of the cake?
Thank you.
Oh, she wrote it down on a little piece of paper.
That's awful nice.
Is it a good one?
Oh, it looks...
Personal.
Oh, okay, it's personal. Wow. Someone it a good one? Oh, it looks... Oh, okay. It's personal.
Someone had a breakup.
Alright, your seven names,
Steve,
are...
Hey! Hey!
Shit's getting knocked over. It's so exciting.
There's fucking two iPhones in here. Dial it the fuck down.
I'm going to call you on your Alphone,
and then you're going to die.
You can eat some cats,
and then you have my permission to die.
Don't worry.
It's beautiful this time of year
on the planet Melmac.
Was that what it was called?
It was Melmac.
Okay.
Gotta check with Newsies.
All right, your seven names are Josh Mostel.
Don't yell it out, you guys, because it's going to come into your head.
David Pamer, Noble Willingham, Bill McKinney, Pruitt Taylor Vince,
Patricia Wettig, and what I call the giveaway name, Jack Palance.
Oh.
It's got Windy City or Heat in it.
What do you think, Steve?
Windy City or Heat in it.
Mm-hmm.
And you calling Jack Palance the giveaway name.
1994.
Wow, I think 30 people just had
fucking aneurysms in the audience.
Let's get him over
to your hospital.
Quick, get him a Cosby sweater.
All right, by the year,
I've maybe seen this movie once,
so I don't know if Jack Palance
is even a part of it.
I'm going to go out on a limb.
I really don't know any Windy City titled
movies.
Okay.
I'm going to go with Red Heat.
Preston knows it for the win.
City Slickers.
No!
Full title.
I thought
it had to have Windy City as the full Windy City.
Or Heat.
Any of those three words.
Windy City or Heat.
Yeah, yeah.
Windy City, that's what I thought.
But do either of you know the full title of the movie?
Is it City Slickers 2, The Legend of Curly's Gold?
That is right.
Wow.
So Preston wins either way.
He is our winner either way.
And so,
who's got Zooks, Jess?
Come on up and get your box of stuff.
There you go.
Don't knock over the cakes.
Don't knock over those cakes.
They're full of methamphetamines.
Congratulations,
Jess.
Yeah, and you get to come on the show.
Let's get Joel.
Can you come write down a shithead on the back of your...
Oh, you wrote it on a piece of paper.
Very nice. Wait, why is there more than one?
One's from somebody else.
Just anybody in the audience gets to do one?
Just pass up your shitheads.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Here we go.
There you go.
Wow, that guy's got a binder full of them.
I was expecting someone to get like
fucking crowd surfed up here.
They're going to like pick an actual
shithead up and just fucking...
Alright, you guys.
Let's get into this.
I can read them.
Don't forget to watch Sam Levine on
Do No Harm
when it premieres
in another year
and get Graham Elwood's book
Comedy Film Nerds
go to comedyfilmnerds.com
and come back here to see him
September 5th through the 8th
here in Philly.
Yeah.
And the LA Podcast Festival.
If you're going to be in LA October 12th through 14th,
about 16, 17 podcasts.
So check that out.
LAPodFest.com
You definitely got to see Graham live
because it's a lot of straight talk.
And Preston and Steve, You already know everybody lives here
But check out the Preston and Steve podcast
WMMR's Preston and Steve is what it's called
That's it, thank you so much
We appreciate it
Thank you
Thank y'all
And as always
Two in one breath, Doug.
Mormon underwear is a shithead.
Hot rod is a shithead.
Other people with Alph phones is a shithead.
Oh, we're going to have some fucking Alph phone on Alph phone crime out in the lobby.
Dephrase too soon
is the shithead.
Let me give you that back,
Newsy. Oh, bring these
cakes out in the lobby and we'll eat them.
And this is from the
cake bosses.
Cake boss!
Matt
Ho is the shithead? Wow. Yeah, and Matt Shithead is a shithead?
Yeah.
Wow.
Yeah, and Matt Shithead is a ho.
And what does that even say?
We saw Matt sexy dancing with another girl.
I know.
Canard?
Canard from The Wire is a shithead.
Oh, okay.
Canard from The Wire is a shithead? New Jersey is a shithead oh okay canard from the wire is a shithead new jersey is a
shithead wow wow
wow natalie winberg is a shithead she's probably seeing matt ho at this point
jerry sandusky is a douchebag shithead yeah She's probably seeing Matt Ho at this point.
Jerry Sandusky is a douchebag shithead.
Yeah.
Yes.
That's accurate.
A little editorializing there.
Todd Akin is a shithead.
EBM is a shithead.
What's EBM? What's EBM?
What's EBM, Kim with the Starburst?
I don't want to eat them.
He only eats the green ones.
And finally,
and also as always,
and if you're listening and you're coming to a show in the future,
don't think I'm ever going to do this again.
This is special for Philadelphia what's up Philly
get ready to run guys
the Phillies for trading Shane Victorino as a ship.
Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie.
Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky.
There's no room in his heart for you.
Because Doug loves movies.