Doughboys - Crumbl Cookies with Mary Jane Gibson and Mike Glazer

Episode Date: April 20, 2023

Mary Jane Gibson and Mike Glazer (Weed and Grub) join the 'boys to discuss cannabis, seafood, and Newfoundland before celebrating the holidaze with a review of Crumbl Cookies. Plus, another edition of Snack or Wack.Sources for this week's intro: https://www.dol.gov/newsroom/releases/whd/whd20221220 https://www.zoominfo.com/c/crumbl-cookies/434830086 https://www.npr.org/2023/02/26/1157368469/child-labor-violations-increase-states-loosen-rules https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2023/feb/11/us-child-labor-laws-violations https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/politics-news/arkansas-gov-sanders-signs-measure-rolling-back-child-labor-protection-rcna73977 https://www.cbsnews.com/minnesota/news/iowas-senate-advances-bill-to-loosen-child-labor-laws/ https://disa.com/maps/marijuana-legality-by-state https://crumblcookies.com/historyWant more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What's up, everybody? It's your boy, The Spoon Man, and I want to talk to you about today's sponsor, Uber Eats. At Uber Eats, we've helped more than 400,000 restaurants across the U.S. reach new, hungry customers and deliver growth quickly through new orders. Uber's global platform can help you grow, reach new people, get valuable sales data, and unlock ways to expand with flexible delivery options. Put your business on Uber Eats. Get access to the Uber Eats platform, including valuable sales data to grow your business. Dig into your data. Really dig in there, anytime, to monitor your performance and customer order trends. Wow. Wow.

Why, restaurant owners, enjoy 0% commission for the first 30 days on all orders, offer subject to change per the terms of the restaurant agreement. Wow, 0% on the first 30 days. Sign up today. That link that you want to click on is down there in the episode description. Right down there. Check it out. There it is. Move your cursor. Go ahead and click. Or if you're on your phone, use your finger and click that link. Click that link in the episode description. $57,854. That was the fine leveled by the Department of Labor against America's fastest growing cookie chain for dozens of violations of child labor laws. With estimated annual

revenue of $12.7 billion, the penalty against the Utah-based confectionary didn't even qualify as a slap on the wrist. And it represents a troubling trend in the food service industry, with American labor power ascending for the first time since the blight of Reaganism, and successful unionization efforts affecting chain restaurants in particular, corporations and their enablers have sought out fresh meat to grind in the gears of capitalism, in the form of children. In 2022, Burger King, McDonald's, Popeyes, and Subway were all fined for illegally employing children in dangerous or after-hours roles, and the problem is even worse up the supply chain, where vulnerable immigrant children are increasingly employed as farm laborers

and at meatpacking plants. So today, a growing wave of red states are addressing these egregious breaches. By repealing child labor laws. Arkansas Governor and Wario's Princess Peach Sarah Huckabee Sanders proudly signed a law rolling back her state's child labor laws this year. An Iowa State Senate recently pulled an all-night session to pass a bill allowing children to work longer and later hours, as well as serve alcohol. But as protections for children in the workplace seem to be eroding, a practice that will no doubt be further enabled by an activist right-wing judiciary, progress has at least been made on a different social issue. Marijuana. In the late 1990s, led by the live-and-let-smoke-left coast, America

began decriminalizing medical marijuana state-by-state. In 2012, after Washington and Colorado legalized recreational marijuana, other states swiftly followed their lead. And as of today, pot is fully legal in 21 states. And when you contract the munchies after sparking a spliff of sticky icky purchase from a storefront dispensary, you can satisfy your cravings with some sweet treats from one of the now 400 locations of the cookie bakery that's taken TikTok by storm. Just know your order may have been prepared by small hands. This week on a special 420 edition of Doe Boys, buddy. Crumble cookies. Welcome to Doe Boys, the podcast about chain restaurants. I'm Nick Weigher, along with

my co-host, Real Big Filet-O-Fish, the Spoonman Mike Mitchell. That is a funny one. That's a good one. That's from Alex at LameRod, like the star band, but McDonald's, XOXO. That's good. And I like Real Big Fish. Don't you have some sort of connection to Real Big Fish? Isn't someone from your high school in the band or something? A couple of people from my high school, Tabis Wurz, who I believe listens to the pod on occasion, and Danny Regan, the trumpet and trombone player in a certain era of Real Big Fish, respectively, were along Beach Polly High grads and contemporaries of mine. And

Brandon Wurz, who is Tabis's younger brother, a very good friend of mine who does listen to the podcast. You met Brandon, he came to... No, you didn't meet him because you weren't fucking there. I just remembered that. We had the LA live show on Gabriel's podcast. We did the High and Mighty, the Power Hour, and you were in a basement in Quincy, Massachusetts on FaceTime. In Romandy's house. I'm sorry, in Romandy's house. Yes, of course. You wanted to make sure the internet connection was extra shitty for this live show that people paid money for.

It was fun having me remotely. Sell out, right? Sell out, yeah. Sell out with me. Oh, yeah. That's a great song. That's a classic. Wags cookies cookies everywhere without a crumb to eat. Yeah, as sailors used to say. It makes sense for today's episode. It absolutely does, bitch. I'm not arguing with you. What is the real saying?

Water, water, everywhere with none of it to drink. Without a drop to drink? It might be without a drop to drink, yeah. Our guests are nodding along. So that meant they were... Probably I'm guessing not listening, just sort of like... I want to share so much, but I'm just patiently waiting. So that was about them sailing on the ocean and then being like, fuck, I want to drink the ocean, but I can't.

Can't drink saltwater, Mitch. Can't do it. All right, that makes sense. First rule of life, boats. Oh, so they're stranded. That brings a little darker twist. Yeah, that's the whole idea. Yeah, because otherwise, water would be excess water. You'd have water for a lifeboat. I get that, but I thought that maybe they were just fishing. I'm thirsty right now, I'm looking at it.

Just a lower stakes version of it. Yeah. I mean, it's the same principle. I kind of have thought about maybe becoming a fisherman in some way. If I went back to Massachusetts, I mean, it's like the hardest life ever. Yeah. And I wouldn't be good at it. But I think it's just the idea of maybe getting lost at sea seems nice.

I mean, you could just slap on a raincoat and go to Hollywood Boulevard and be the Morton's guy. That might be, honestly, it might be a nice runner-up spot instead of being an actual fisherman. Right. It feels like a tough job, but I love the old ocean wigs. We're both ocean boys. We're both ocean guys. We are.

We love the ocean. I'm an Atlantic, you're a Pacific man. That's the dynamic of the podcast. Howdy ho to Spood Nation. Emma, let's hit them with a little drop. Cannabis. THC. Cannabis.

The munchies. I smoked a lot of weed. That's all I said. I just feel pretty good. I feel like pretty laid back and this is, hey, things are all right. Happy anybody. Oh my god. I liked it.

A very fitting drop for 420, buddy. Is today 420? This episode is releasing on 420, Mitch. Hey, all right, dude. That's cool. In your younger days, you weren't a weed smoker, right? I smoked a weed like in high school and college and I never really took to it in the way I took to alcohol, which is so much more destructive.

And I just like, it's like, I wish I could will I could have willed myself to be a marijuana person versus an alcohol person, but that's not what my body craved. I smoke weed. Well, you also probably had the same experience of, oh, I should read who sent. Yes, please. This drop is certified dank for your 420 needs. Oh, yeah. Love the show.

Burger Brigade for life. Why the fuck? From Ian, I won't say his last name. Thanks, Ian. Sent December 27th, 2018. No way. That's from over five years ago or, I guess, under five years ago. Ian made a fucking start at COVID for all we know.

Wow. I've been fucking patient zero. I'm just impressed that that one was dug out of the archives. Yeah, yeah. Let's take that's DK for you. Like fucking he's like fucking Obi-Wan in the Jedi archives going through. This drops out there. Hopefully he doesn't kill any of the younglings.

The Doughboy's Younglings, which we have. I used to, I smoked weed when I was younger. Yeah. But this is like in the sounds like the old man. We should introduce our guests. Let's introduce our guests. Because this could not be more on topic for this episode. Our guest today hosts the Cannabis and Food podcast, Weed and Grubb.

Coming back to the show, Mike Glazer and Mary Jane Gibson. Thank you both for being here. Thanks for coming. What a treat. Delight. Happy High Holidays, everyone. Happy High Holidays, buddy. Yeah, what's up?

So, Mitch, you were just talking about you getting into weed. Your injection. And also, so you know, we drug test. So we made sure that they weren't using any weed that you guys had. You guys had to stop smoking for what? A couple of weeks before you came on, right? Yeah. I thought I had to fail a drug test to get on here, which I did.

Emma, we shouldn't let Emma be in charge of the drug test. Yeah. Well, we didn't want to handle anyone's urine like I asked Emma. I passed the COVID test, failed the drug test. I'm also sorry, Emma, but thank you for handling my urine. I don't know. I don't know. Emma, we should mention a, as we've talked about the show

and avid pot enthusiast herself, wearing a coffee can and cannabis shirt today. Is that a combo that works for you and you? Yes, absolutely. I actually put this on by accident this morning. This was a mistake, but my two favorite substances in one spot. So that's just endemic to your identity. Is just you're like, oh, this is a shirt I'll wear today. Yeah, the regular rotation.

Well, I was going to say, if it was some other shirt that just had like another fucking weed thing on it, I'm sure Emma, how many shirts, how many shirts do you have that are like 420 type shirts? I don't know. I'd have to go count them too many. The coffee and cannabis is also known as the Seattle Speedball. Is that true? Yes.

That's cool as hell. That seems like that would drive me insane. Like, that's like, I don't like jitters from coffee. And then if I was high and felt any anxiety, that would, it would make me feel crazy. I would not like it. And the reason that I stopped smoking weed was kind of the anxiousness that I would get from it, because I, it was two things.

We've talked, I've talked about this before, but either, either I would smoke regularly and then be cloudy. I'd be like in a haze, right? Or I would smoke every so often. I don't know if that's weird, but, and then I would smoke every so often and then get anxious. So that's like where I like find a legious, but I used to smoke a lot. Both of those things sound awful.

Both of them were more bad. I mean, they were fun at all. Yeah. Neither, neither of them were good. There was like a good in between, of course. Like there were, there were times where I like really liked smoking. And, and I did it wise. I was going to say the thing I was going to say that makes me feel dated is

like, remember buying like bags of like, like what, I don't know what they're called, Schaefer, whatever they, what was like the shake? Like it was just like a bad, it looked like oregano. It's like why, oh yeah. Okay. Yeah. Oregano. And like, there would be sticks and seeds in it.

This is back in Quincy. And also felt very, like when I was 15 years old, it felt like, oh my God, this is like so elite. I'm going to get like, this is, this can't get much worse than this. Like as far as like being in trouble or something. Unless you're like me and you were selling that seedy, sticky bullshit in Missouri at the time, that was, that was not, uh, one of my finer days. Ziploc bags of bad weed was tough.

Yeah. Where in Missouri are we talking? So you just had, uh, Mort on the show. Mort Burke. We love Mort. Mort Burke didn't know it, but, uh, I'm also a St. Louisan. I grew up in St. Louis. Wow.

And my very first summer job ever was the cash register at Emos Pizza. Wow. Yeah. Emos Pizza. Or I'm, we were talking about my last name earlier. Yeah. Emos versus Imos. Yeah.

I think it's Emos. You worked there and you're unclear. I wasn't good at it. It was very bad at it. What, do you know what the St. Louis in pronunciation of it is? Cause I forget if it's Imos or Emo, I forget which one, but they get mad at you. Like everywhere, every, every other local thing. They were just like, you got it wrong.

We're mad. We hear that all the time, but it's just one of the two. So you're about to be fucking crucified. I'm sorry. I'm going to get skewered and they follow me on Instagram. This is going to be a disaster. Did you ever combine your two professions? Like, were you selling while you were working there?

That was why I worked there and I was bad at it is because I would sell that terrible weed by the dumpster in the back. I was a Kevin Smith. I was walking Kevin Smith movie. You know, like it was really, it was, it was pretty typical. Yeah. All right, boys, we got them. Sting operation from Wags and I.

You have my drug test. We got your drug test. We got you admitting that used Emos as your front or Imos. Did you like the pizza there? I feel like people are very. I loved it. I still love it. Wow.

It's the, I think it's a better cheese than, well, that's a stretch. I love it. I don't want to compare pie places, but I think Provella is delicious. Wow. I never, I've never tried St. Louis style. So I got to, I mean, either maybe we got to go do a tour there or Kansas City. I don't want to write, we get barbecue over there too. Yeah.

I have had St. Louis barbecue. I don't remember what place I went to. What'd you think? Okay. Okay. Oh wait, I'd like to share because Mary Jane, we were in St. Louis for some shows and Mary Jane, you tried toasted ravioli from Emos for the first time. Oh, I sure did.

Pipe and hot. Right. What did you think? It was great. The, the, the counterperson found out that it was my first time at, I'm going to say Emos hard and strong and, uh, Emos and, uh, and the counterperson who I think also enjoys the, the good reefer, um, cause she looked pretty happy and she found out it was, and she like deposited a toasted ravioli into my outstretched hands.

I was taking communion for the first time and I ate a hot sitting right at the counter right there and it was a revolution or revelation. It was, wow. Interrupt. Maybe a revolution too. Who knows? It was great. Doughboys live under the St. Louis arch.

What do you think? Ark, arch, arch. It's not an arc. Scary. Huge boat, pretending of flood. No, it's an arch. Doughboys live under the St. Louis arch. My dad talked to me about the engineering of the arch and he was like, they had to

build it from the bottom up and then connect them at the top. Wow. And so they had, like the surveying had to be so precise that if they were off by like a quarter of an inch, they wouldn't have connected. I just imagined the day when they get up there and someone fucked up and they're like, no, Steve fucking Steve. Yeah. Uh, you know, your dad's got some great facts.

We text, we text all the time. He's a fat guy. Yeah. I thought you called him a fat guy for a second. I'm not a fat guy. Yeah. No. Um, why is, please, please, fat guy is me.

My father is fat guy. Wise. I stopped, I smoked like the shake. Yes. Like that, like, uh, and, but, but that was like in like out of like soda cans, like also it got so much better just like years later. But when I went to Ithaca, that's where I was like, oh, there's like nice full nuggets and like it was way nicer at that point.

Uh, and then like smoked for a while. But then out here, I did do it for like the first 10 years I was out here, but slowly trickled off and I don't do it anymore. It's such a strange climate to have lived through. I think this applies to all of us to have lived through like the, like the effective like prohibition era where it's just like, this is just illegal everywhere and you're just like, you will go to prison if we catch you with this. To now it's like, it's, it's decriminalized or outright legalized in most

states in the country. Obviously there's still the federal ban and, and you know, much more detail wise about how this, how all this works, but it's like, it's so strange that just dispensaries are businesses. And then when I was younger, I remember just being like an illicit thing. Like it was like seeing cocaine at a party. It's like, oh my God, you have weed, you know, so wild. Yeah, yeah, it felt, it felt, it felt dangerous back when I was a kid.

Yeah. But I also was like kind of a narc. I was like kind of like a little Donnie Brasco. I was like working undercover and I was ratting people out. Oh man, why would you do that, Mitch? Because that's just what, that's what, because bottom line for me, kind of like a cop, that's on the 420 episode, I want to say, I'm a little bit like a cop. No, I would never, that the blue line, not so thin.

I got a big, thick blue line. No, I, I would not, I never narc to anyone else. Yeah, I do remember, I remember, I shouldn't say his name. Well, maybe I could believe it. But one of the guys, I'll call him Holland. That's what I'll call him. I said his last name. That's more of an identifier than his first name.

You really are a narc. I fucked up. I remember he like sold me a bag of weed and it was like really bad. It was like all stems. And I was like, I don't really want this. And then I told him, I was like, I don't really want it. And I gave it to my other friend, Joe. I'll just call him Joe.

Great. You know what's funny? Holland's name is Joe Holland. Oh no. But I gave it to my other friend, Joe Tormey. And I was like, give it back to Joe. I was like, give it back to Joe. And then Joe Tormey smoked the entire bag.

And then Joe Holland was like, you give me your weed. I was like, I gave it to Joe to give back to you. He was like, you owe me money. So I was like, I was like, but Joe did. And he was like, no, you owe me money. I was like, okay. And then I didn't want to pay it. And then he was like, I'm going to fight you.

And I was like, oh, fuck. And I was like, I'll pay it. He's like, I still want to fight you. And I was like, oh God. So I didn't want to fight him. And then my friend, Justin was like, he wants to fight you. And I was like, I know, he's like, come with me. We're going to go for a walk.

So the three of us went with a walk. Justin and we were throwing fists at each other. And he gave me a bloody nose. And then I was like, can we stop? And he's like, yeah, we can stop. So that was like my only time I got in trouble for, for, for, for weed. He, a third party made you throw hands. Justin, Justin, he was one of my best friends.

I love Justin. You, you've met Justin. I met Justin, lovely man. But we fought in front of Justin. Got a bloody nose. Wow. It's like honor code. And it was a little bit like honor code.

And also like when you get the bloody nose, you're just kind of like, I guess it's over. I guess I've lost. Like when you get the bloody nose, it's, it's, it's a done deal. I think it might be a rule in boxing in the UFC. If someone gets a bloody nose and then it's over, they call it. Judge Mills Lane waves it off. I want to ask Mary Jane, cause we're talking about Mike being from St.

Louis. Where, where are you from? Is that the celebrity death match, man? I was just going to ask that as well. Bald head, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Let's get it on.

That was his whole thing. But if he's ending the match, what do you say? Let's, let's cool it off. Yeah, let's get it off. Let's get off. Yeah, let's get off. That makes sense. Is that what Justin said?

Yeah. He did want to, when, when I was my nose blood, he said, let's get it off. And I said, I, and I stopped. Yeah. Let's get it off. You guys had to do like an auto focus thing. Justin's just watching. If that's, if that's, if that, I, I would have beaten Joe in that.

I would have been done so fast. I'd probably give myself a bloody nose, how fast I went. That's like an anime trope. Someone gets like so like aroused or like so like excited that they just get a bloody nose. It's like a, like a, like a gotten nerdy guy and a girl's into him. And he just, those starts bleeding spontaneously. Interesting how you knew that immediately.

I watch anime. What do you want from me? It sounds like you watch horny anime. No, it's, I was not necessarily horny anime. I've, does it happen more in horny anime? Yeah, but it's not exclusive to horny anime. It's like when their eyes get really, really, really big and you kind of tear up and then like just a slow nose bleed.

Sometimes that happens. I'll slow down Mary Jane. I'm getting. It's also sometimes like explosive. It's like, ah, you know, like it's, it's very exaggerated. I kind of want to watch some horny anime. Okay. We'll talk some.

Yeah. Can we get a month on the Patreon? All right, great. Uh, Mary. What do you want to watch? Highest high school DxD. Can I go with girls? Get a lot of options.

Okay. All right. Again, very quick with the options. Let's do anime August. August, uh, and I'm August. I don't know. I'm just gonna come up with something. Yeah, we'll do it.

We got options. Great. And one has to be Jack Offable. Yeah, we can all be Jack Offable. All right, great. All right, good. Uh, anyways, what are you guys saying? Mary Jane, where she was from and what food she grew up with.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. As long as one can be a Jill Offable as well. A whole situation. I'll join in. Um, I'm a, I'm a salty North Atlantic girl. Okay. I grew up in Newfoundland and, uh, in a fishy family. My dad and sister and grandmother were all fishery scientists.

And then, um, you were talking about getting lost at sea. Yeah. I worked on an Alaskan fishing boat for a while. Wow. So love both East and West coast water worlds. How are things up? Are the seas calm, calmer up in calmer, calmer, calmer, calmer, are they calm? Are they calm?

Are they calm up there and calm, calm, calmer, it is a weird word. We can all agree. Yeah, it's that weird L. Yeah. Do you pronounce the L? Is it calm? Is it calm? It'd be better if it was C-A-H-M maybe.

Calm, calm is easier to say. Calm, calm, calm. Sounds like kind of like calm. It does sound kind of like calm. When you were saying it, it sounded kind of like calm. Are the seas calm? You're hard to say calm. Are the seas come where I come from?

Are the seas come where you come from? They may have come. How, how is it up there? I've never been, I've never been up, up your way. You're from Massachusetts. Yeah, yeah, so not too far. I mean, it is far, I guess, but. It's kind of a straight shot and they're pretty similar in that sort of like

salty fisher person culture. Um, you know, New Zealand's where the Titanic sank off of. So it's like icebergs and seals, not, not too calm. Yeah. The perfect storm was sort of like the, they left from Gloucester, I think. That's where I was fishing off of kind of like that area outside the, you know, perimeter between Newfoundland and Massachusetts. When I was thinking of getting lost to sea, that's what I was thinking.

Yeah. That big wave at the end of the perfect storm. I haven't revisited it in a while. I don't know if it's any good, but. It was great. Yeah. At the time, I liked it. Well, I think it's cool.

Yeah. I don't, I actually don't know if it holds up, but I remember it being cool. Wahlberg, Clooney, who's the third? Who's the third fisherman? The third big actor in it. Oh man. Matt Damon.

Is it Damon? It's like a Damon vehicle. It might be a day. It might be Damon. I wanted to say it was like Tim Robbins or something, but I don't remember. I thought there was like a character guy in there. I'm going to look it up. I'm going to look it up.

So you're from that neck of the woods. I am. The perfect storm neck of the woods. Okay. So not calm at all. Not calm. Okay. All right.

For whatever reason, I thought when you went up north, it like leveled out a little bit, but I guess, I guess the ocean is scary wherever. It doesn't really. Yeah, it's pretty right now in Newfoundland. The sea ice is coming down from the north and it's like all icebergs and, you know, where the seals pop on the ice and yeah, it's pretty wild. That's cool as hell. I mean, unless it's bad from global warming, I don't know which one it is.

The third male lead was a character actor, but there's no one we named. Oh, I know it is. You know what it is? It's, um, it's Dewey Cox. It's a... John C. Reilly. John C. Reilly. Yeah.

Whoa, really? Oh, I forgot his name. Yeah. That just popped when you, when you say, I just popped into my head. No, no, I can't picture, I've not seen the movie. So I will see it now because I can't picture him. He's like, whoa, there's like a wave coming or something. Cause that's how I picture his acting.

Yeah. I mean, that's a quote from the movie. You just recited it. Can we watch it during anime month? Yeah, we'll do, we'll throw in one perfect storm. All right, great, great. And we'll jack off to it. I mean, perfect.

Oh, these seas are cumb. A wave that mighty and powerful, we gotta jack off to it. Anyway, what's the food like in Newfoundland? Um, a lot of like, you know, kind of hard scrabble things that you would have to like use to get through the winter. Mmm, sure, yeah. Salt cod. Um, one of my favorite things are called scrunchies and they're like fatback pork that are fried

up into tiny little juicy, salty, crunchy pork bits that you can then put across like a fish and bruise. Yeah. There's a traditional salt cod fish pie made with hard tack. It all sounds disgusting, but you know, it's. This is cool as hell. It's like very, it's sustenance for hard workers, basically. It's, you know, a lot of, you know, rum.

A lot cooler than St. Louis. That's so true. Her grocery store in Newfoundland used to be a hockey rink. And so the scoreboard says like fruits and vegetables on it. It's pretty great. The memorial stadium, they left up the whole scoreboard. So like when you're shopping for cereal, you can just look up. That's fucking crazy.

Yeah, it's pretty great. And it's still on ice. Yeah, definitely. You have to strap on your skates when you walk in. Do you find yourself like, do you have, are you, are you often craving seafood? Do you find the seafood you find in other places can't live up to what you grew up with? What's your relationship to seafood? I love seafood, but I definitely like, yeah, you know, when you've grown up eating like

stuff that you're, you caught yourself, you know, I don't necessarily order a lot of salmon, for instance. But I do love, I just had some cod last week and some halibut and that's my comfort food. I like halibut quite a lot. Yeah. Nice piece of halibut over some greens. Yeah. Wow.

Yeah. My mom makes a great baked tatic. You talked about this baked tatic. Great baked tatic. Yeah. Great grandma's recipe. Ooh. Very good.

I, I, I was used to just, I mean, and also comparatively, you know, Quincy's on the water, but like comparatively probably less seafood than what you were dealing with, but still a lot. Every, like every week at least some sort of fish dish, I feel like. Yeah. Birk seafood. Right. Wags, I've told you, a great spot.

But on the West coast, I'm sure it was probably, were you, were you having seafood like once a week for dinner? Cause we usually had it at least once a week. It was some sort of seafood. It was like not rare to have. Yeah. Like in our household, but I think that's partly because, you know, my parents came from more inland California and then they all, they eventually moved over.

So like, you know, it was like, yeah, it was, it was more, you know, like Arcadia is a little bit more inland. Um, it's, they, they went to UC Riverside, which is like inland empire and it just got a kind of more of like a, you know, desert-y sort of like culture. It's a little bit less about, you know, just fresh seafood is not as available. So it's less of a thing in our household. I actually got into it more as an adult, uh, but yeah, I like, I didn't grow up with that sort of, I certainly didn't have your experience of growing up like fresh caught

seafood all the time and actually had kind of an aversion for it until I was older. Like I thought it was like, yeah, fish is gross. It is gross though. That's the thing. Yeah, it is kind of gross. It can be gross. Yeah. And like, I think that so many people don't encounter like fish being delicious ever

in their lifetime. So they're just like, fish is disgusting. And it totally is. It's like so many other things, unless you have it when it's yummy, it is gross. Well, that was like, even as a kid, like I ate that baked haddock and like would loved fish and chips, which was like readily available everywhere, but like old fish, old fish is nasty. And I would eat, even shrimp as a kid, which I think is weird, but like stuff like mussels

and, and oysters took me a while to get on board with that. Yeah. That was harder. That for sure. But once I got into like sushi, I'm like, oh man, this is great. Like I want to discover that and you kind of have the on ramp with some of like like a California roll or crab roll. It's a little bit more accessible.

But that's interesting. Like Mayo is the vehicle. Yes, right. Enjoying fish. Yeah, it does a lot. 100% look a nasty in that California roll. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah.

I think like bad muscle, like if you have bad versions of those or like a chewy muscle, that is like disgusting. And that was like, I mean, still is like bad seafood is pretty gnarly. I wouldn't want to eat any bad. No, I wouldn't want to eat any bad food. But like bad seafood specifically seems grosser for whatever. Yeah, like you can eat a weird old burger and still be fine. But you can't really eat like a weird old muscle and survive.

Or maybe you can, I don't know. You know, I fucking love and I never would have thought I would love it as a kid is eel. Eel is great. Unagi. Yeah, I'll have some. I don't eat enough. I don't eat a lot.

I shouldn't say I don't eat enough eel, but I don't really. You gotta eat more. I gotta eat more. You doctors been telling you that you're gonna see me or just slurping it down like spaghetti. Oh, it's still the little electricity going off the end of its tail. It's electric eel. Out of your ears.

Yeah, that's fine. I will I maybe should eat more. I mean, like maybe in sushi that was me getting shot. No, yeah, we got it. Anime month is going to be pretty wild. How often in like anime will like a guy eat an eel and like like, does that happen often? Would you say?

Or yeah, I mean, it'll happen. I never eat eel, but eel also, I don't know. Eel is eel like a big northeast stuff for whatever reason. I feel like I don't I never like saw a lot of it. They eat them in France. There's a huge eel called the conger eel that grow to be up to six feet long. Wow, huge sort of like deep ocean open water eels and they're delicious

and they serve them in steaks like sliced sort of like crosswise. And they come, you know, like, I don't even know. Like it's just sort of like a swordfish. And I feel like that is also available maybe in the northeast in America and Canada, but we don't eat it. Yeah, there's like a French thing, but you know, swordfish for me also, like any thick fish, I'm still not like huge. I'm like a fish steak.

I don't usually mahi mahi. I do. I don't get me wrong. I've had them and like enjoyed them. But like a thicker, you know, one's like as thick as a steak. I'm not as of not as interested in it. Yeah, I prefer the flaky. Yeah.

The cod, the halibut, the haddock, the pollock. 100%. Yeah. And lobster, I was I realized I was saying that I had lobster a lot growing up that people are going to make fun of me. But it's the truth. It just was it wasn't like it wasn't that it wasn't an expensive thing. No, I think for it's like it's a shorthand for a like like this.

Oh, this high class meal. Like it's it but but, you know, certainly in parts of the Northeast and other parts of the world, it's just widely available. And so it's not a sort of thing. You're going to break the bank. It has to be a special occasion only thing. You don't have to go to Red Lobster for it. It was a peasant food at one point.

Yeah, wasn't it historically? Yeah. But now you're walking up and down your stairs, eating lobster tails. Nonstop. Got to be Eels. And Eels. Yeah, that was going to be Eel. Just Eel and Lobster.

Ha ha ha ha ha. Also going to say this, fuck you first of all. Newfoundland is great because also when you read it, it's Newfoundland. Yeah. It's cool. It's one of the cool, you know, you said another one. Arcadia is kind of cool because sounds like an arcade. Yeah.

But Newfoundland. Great name. That's a great name. Yeah. How do you, why do you say it to me? Well, Newfoundlanders pronounce it to rhyme with understand. Newfoundland understand. But I think most people say Newfoundland or

Newfoundland, Newfoundland. So it's one of those things. Yeah. When you're from there, you say different, but it's like nobody from there is actually mad at anyone saying it, you know, like not, like they're not from there. You know, they're not like our listeners. Yeah.

You will, there will be one Newfoundlander who is listened to the podcast and he'll be mad. Yeah. I appreciate that because the thing that Newfoundlanders do get mad about is Newfie, which is like the sort of, you know, people shorten and they say, oh, you're a Newfie. And Newfoundlanders do sort of take offense to that. Newfie.

Newfie. A Newfie. Sounds like a skateboard style. Oh yeah. That's cool. Oh, that's fucking sick. Yeah. So I shouldn't have said it because Newfoundlanders don't like it.

Yeah. No, but that's good to know. That dude popped a Newfie. Oh no, here come the cops. Hurry up. One more Newfie. Mitch is coming. Dude, we got like four or five Newfies in.

Newfie. All right, it's kind of, it's kind of like a, you're being an asshole if you call someone a Newfie. Yeah. It's what the rest of Canada refers to Newfoundlanders as. Got it. Newfoundlanders are like off in the butt of Canadian jokes. Like, you know, I suppose like people from Arkansas are the butt of, you know,

sure, like it's one of those things where they're just like, don't say that about us. Yeah. Florida, I feel like Florida gets a lot of the United States jokes. But, but Florida is like very populist. Newfoundland is not as populist, right? It's a little bit more rural and remote. Got it. I think that's why the Arkansas example.

That's good. Yeah. Yeah. And was, and is Bill Clinton also from Newfoundland? Yes. Oh, wow. Okay. Interesting.

Don't call me a Newfie. I hate to be called a Newfie. The famous Newfoundlanders are like kind of like scattered around with Bill Clinton being one of them and another one being a porn star, Shannon Tweed. Wow. She was from Newfoundland. Yes. All right.

I actually do like it in Newfoundland. Call me a Newfie all you want. Hey, where is, is Sox from Newfoundland? I think Sox, the cat might also be. Yeah, the Sox guy is also from there. That's right. All right. That's right.

Well, look, we have a lot to discuss about crumble cookies, but we're going to take a break and we'll be right back with more dough boys. This show is brought to you by BetterHelp. You know, Mitch, I learned something new about myself recently. I learned I can stick to a bedtime routine. Wow. I can go to the bed at bed at the same time and wake up at the same time every day and stick to that.

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Do it. Welcome back to doughboys. We're here with our host of Weed and Grubb, Mike Laser, Mary Jane Gibson, discussing this week's chain, Crumble Cookies, which started in 2017 in Utah by Sawyer Hemsley and Jason McGowan. Utah and Jane. I feel like there was another Utah chain, Mitch, we talked about recently. We did. On Salt Lake, when we went to Salt Lake City, right?

Well, there was a Salt Lake chain. We went to a Ruby Snap in Salt Lake. That was a cookie. Which was a cookie place. That was a cookie chain, but it's not as big as this one because what's happened with this one is that it's not as big as the other ones, but it's not as big as the other ones. It's a cookie chain, but it's not as big as this one because what's happened with

Crumble Cookies. By the way, I was looking up Socks the Cat, and it's taking me to PresidentialPetMuseum.com, and it's not loading. Okay, here it is. Oh my God. Presidential, no, Socks has passed, but Presidential Pet Museum, you're really rooting for Socks to be dead. He was in a complex.

You know what was going on with some of Clinton's shady stuff. Absolutely. So. Lolita.com. Socks killed Epstein. Yeah. So on this website on PresidentialPetMuseum.com, it Socks the Cat, July 21, 2013, by Presidential Pet Museum.

This is the date of the article. But then it has votes. I guess you can vote on the Presidential Pets. Socks has got a 4.5 out of 5. It looks like 167 votes. It's weird to be voting on dead animals. Why are we doing that? I don't know.

Maybe we like Socks a lot. Wow, here's Socks on Bill Clinton's shoulder. It's kind of cute. But that's just going to be a proxy for people's politics, as all things are, right? It's just like, why, like, why, like, what, they stick to this cat check, or Nixon's dog checkers. It shouldn't be downvoted just because of his affiliation with Nixon. You know?

That's true. Yeah, he should probably be upvoted. Yeah, he might be a cute dog. I don't fucking know. Socks died in 2009 at the ripe old age of 20. Whoa. So, Clinton's issued the following statement. Shall I read it?

Yeah. Should we stand? Yeah, you guys should probably stand. I'll sit because I'm the one reading it. Socks brought much happiness to Chelsea and us over the years, and enjoyment to kids and cat lovers everywhere. We're grateful for those memories, and we especially want to thank our good friend, Betty Curry, for taking such loving care of Socks for so many years.

We will spread Socks' ashes at Little St. James this afternoon. That's the end of it. Wow. And smoke a blunt in his honor. Wow. Emma also stood and put her hand over her arm. Did you really, Emma? I do like Socks, despite...

You get. How many times did Socks try to, like, bury one of Clinton's loads? Jesus Christ. Wow. At least six. I don't know where do you... Boking like a single cat owner. It happens.

It happens. Your cats do look eerily like Socks. Yeah, they are. Yeah, they're tuxes. They're tuxes. Yep. Mm-hmm. So, crumble cookies.

Socks got a very white, like, kind of a very, a lot of white on his face, which, Wally and Emma. Yes. A little bit. A little bit. Crumble, there's no E in crumble, just C-R-U-M-B-L. Yeah, so it's a pretty recent chain. I'm sorry.

There's one last thing I have to say. Okay, great. Go for it. I'm just reading up on this. This just caught my eye, and I think that you will very much like this. It was a subject of a popular 1990s TV comedy, Murphy Brown, which the star of the show unintentionally kidnapped him from the White House. That's fine.

He starred in a never-released video game. I know about this, yeah. Designed for Super Nintendo and Sega Genesis systems in 1993. In the game, he had to dodge various obstacles. Maybe Mr. Clinton's loads. Rope course. Such as spies and corrupt politicians to warn the Clintons of nuclear threat. That's wild.

That's amazing. He also appeared in Muppet Form on Larry King Live for an interview with Kermit the Frog who was guest hosting. Anyways. I can't believe he's only a 4.5 with that kind of- Yeah, that's got to boost your fucking score up. What a resume. Top cap.

Have you played that game? No, it was never released. I don't know if there's a leaked ROM that you can play on an emulator, but I've never actually played it. I think I've seen some either concept art or screenshots. I can't remember what's actually out there about it, but yeah, I had heard about this. Truly wild.

You bury the Epstein logs in his litter box? That's part of the game? So, as far as- This is one of those companies that, like Insomnia, grew a lot in recent years. And Insomnia, the other big titan of the cookie empire, the cookie industry right now. They are-

It has over 600 stores, but as recently as 2020, it had like 100 stores. So, all of its growth is like just in the past few years. I don't- I mean, can we get into a bit? Or do you want to- I'd love to. Let's please get into it. I mean, just because we went yesterday to try a different location

than we tried today with both of you. And that kind of growth is- I think it's hard for any kind of chain to grow that quickly. 100%. And it seemed like, from your experience, that there were maybe some consistency issues, because we really enjoyed what you had today. But what you had at the other location yesterday,

was a different experience. Am I correct? Well, I feel like the cookies had some discrepancies, for sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know how your experience was, like ordering and sort of interacting with the folks. Did you- So, did you just go in store and say like,

ah, give me one of them, we'll give me one of them? It was all kiosk based. Oh, kiosk, okay. So, I did the order on the app. And I will say this, the app is very much not crap. The app is very sleek. Yeah. It's really like, you know, it's really well designed.

It's really easy to build your custom box. There's a graphical representation of every cookie, so you see exactly like what your layout is. And it's really easy to put it into a particular location. And also, you can tip on the app, which is great. And the app says that 100% of tips go to the bakers. That's great. Did they have the oaky option?

Because they did have that in store. Yeah, you had to- Like it was like, call for oaky. Call for oaky? Yeah. Okay. And so, like I had a kind of an awkward conversation. And eventually they were like, you want the oaky, right?

You dance around and I was like, yeah. They knew. When they saw you, they knew. Is that why all those teenage boys were in the one we went to? Yeah, they- Ah, I get it now. I got it. After school special.

Yeah. This to me- This to me is like a popular- I feel old. I mean, I don't feel old. I was saying when I walked in that it reminds me of sprinkles. And I'm like, this is maybe a depressing thing. But I'm like, this chain will be dead in 10 years or something.

It's possible. It's scaling up a lot. And that's hard to sustain. Sprinkles, I think, is a different price. But sprinkles is like- Like their whole thing is like they were a really elevated cupcake. And I think that was- There's less of a market for that long-term than cookies,

which I think are such a big part of the American identity. Sure, yeah. Yeah. I just- I'd never tried them before, before today. I'd never had crumble either. This is my first crumble. My first crumble was today.

So- I had heard of them a lot because of TikTok. They're big on TikTok, apparently. Yeah. So I had always- They'd always come across my algorithm. And they looked amazing. I was sold just on the marketing alone.

But yeah, mall cookies have existed. Like Mrs. Fields was the thing when I was a teenager. And I don't think they had cupcake places when I was a teenager. No, 100%. I did love Mrs. Fields. And then I went to UCLA and there's a place south of UCLA, a campus called Diddy Reese, which is like a local shop. But they're like this kind of cookie shop.

But their whole thing is like- It used to be you get four cookies for $1. Like they were just- It's an incredible value. And now I think it's up to like- Now with inflation, I think it's like $2 for a dollar. But it's still just like an incredible value versus a place like this where you're sometimes paying like $6 a cookie.

Diddy Reese though- I gotta give it to Diddy Reese has that longevity. They do have that longevity. They've been around for a while. And part of that is- But they were also a single location. Like they're not trying to do the scale of a place like crumble. Good point.

Yeah. I worked at Spencer's Gifts in the mall for a very long time. No way. Yeah. It was great. We trade like piercings and tongue rings and things with Mrs. Fields and the people who worked there. And we had this whole underground mall like trading and barter system

where all of us would steal from our stores to get other things that we wanted. And Mrs. Fields cookie cakes, like for birthdays, were always a real nice thing to trade for. So you'd be like, here's a tongue ring. Can I get a giant cookie? Yes, more or less. Yeah. 100%.

This is wild. No one's gonna hire you for a job. Everything you do, it's some sort of ring. What's going on here? Right, Nick? This feels like the kind of thing that would be like a Malcolm Gladwell podcast segment about. If like, I went to the small and found they had their own barter system.

Yeah. In different businesses. What are you pulling right now with, though, boys? What's happening? Well, I've got some Molly, if anyone is looking. Let me know. I would love to have him try some, but. Well, so like the cool thing was the trick was we would,

because people would return things to every store, you could take a bunch of stuff and put it in a trash bag and then take it to the dumpster outside. A lot of dumpster, that's interesting. Dumpster commerce. Yeah, dumpster commerce. I never thought about it. And so, yeah.

So we would throw away items and then go to the dumpster and trade. It was nice. I mean, everyone, I feel like everyone has that sort of, if you work at a theater, you get, I mean, a theater. I just said one of my jobs. Yes. I worked in the theater. If you work retail, there's so much waste and there's so much like enforced

waste. Yes. Like this cannot be, this has to be disposed of rather than given away. But I've talked about before when I worked in the movie theater, we used to scoop up the popcorn, put it in a plastic bag, put it back in the elevator and then they'd put it out the next day. That's nice. Just fucking gnarly.

Wait, would you take that big bag and put it in your trunk? I mean, you could, I'm sure you could, like we could have stolen one of the, but like also there was no need to like pop it so early. Like there were bags of popcorn popped upstairs. Like before, you know what I mean? Yes. Like pop it when you need it, but the popcorn maker was upstairs. Would you have traded me a one tequila, two tequila, three tequila floor

shot glass for that popcorn? A thousand percent. Awesome. And I would have, it would have been right down at the South Shore Plaza, which is across from the movie theater. I would have driven down with the bag of popcorn. I would have traded you for sure. Cool.

We had a Dappie. We had a Dappie. What's Dappie? A Dappie is like a place that would have a one. Like it's like a... Is this like a Spencer's Gifts, like a novelty shop? Yeah, same thing. Okay.

So we don't know Dappies, huh? We didn't have Dappies out here. Maybe it's just a northeast thing. Do they have any joke shops in Newfoundland? Yes. The sharper image. Oh, there you go. Was the big one in the mall?

Joke shop is it? Yeah. The Jason. Wait, isn't that massages? The little higher end, but they got some novelties. I thought that you think that it's a joke shop. Is that a joke shop? You wanted the sharper image and you're like...

I don't know. I'm not allowed to touch anything. That's where we were just like wandering and like, they always had those plasma balls. Yeah. Okay, yeah, yeah. Cool things. Wait, what do you think a joke is Mary Jane? Plasma balls?

The ones where your hair stands on it. This sounds like a place for new fees. Crumble feels like a, I mean, it feels like a very mall. It feels like, I mean, malls are starting to not exist. We were talking about this the other day. We're like... So malls have changed. What I'll say is there are, there is the new fancy outdoor shopping center.

Yes. It's really like geared towards a higher end consumer. Those are like, you know... Those are in great. Those are doing great and those are like expanding and there's more of them being built, but like the old school indoor mall, the air conditioned mall, the oasis of suburbia, that has like the working class, middle class mall, those have kind of like had all their storefront shuttered and are becoming, they're just evolving into something else.

Some of them are being converted into housing. Do you feel like that's because people want to like drive to the store that they want to go to and they don't want to have to like walk inside a... I think there's something about being in an indoor mall that feels now like dated or something, right? Like I think that's a part of it. I don't know what it is. I think there's something to that.

I honestly do think a lot of what you were talking about is like there's a, I think there's just a lot of that. A lot of that used to be shopping to people. People do online shopping now that they used to do at malls. They have to get a bunch of different shit from a bunch of different places and now they can just order it. So I feel like that's part of it. There's something also tangential about like dating apps happening.

Oh, interesting. Because like that was the place to go to the food court and like meet a babe and get some Panda Express or a Sabaro Slice. Oh, Jesus. You know. No. It's going to be a fucking debacle. Fucking Panda Express and a Sabaro Slice.

I'm going to shit my pants in front of this lady. I mean like I would never eat and I'm going to eat still to this day. Like I don't want to eat a lot of food and one because I don't want to be like scarfing down food. Yeah. But then also just being full. I would be afraid of that. But hey, I would go to Dappie.

I would walk with Dappie with a and think about. Shake your pants that way. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe think about buying her a one tequila, two tequila, three tequila floors. Shirt or a shot glass. But to me this is, this chain feels like so much like a, it feels like a high-end mall place too.

Right. It feels like a, like a Americana or whatever. There is one that's going there, right? I'm not sure if there is, but here's the thing. I don't think most of their sales are a consumer walks in buys a cookie and eats it on the spot. I don't think they're like a Mrs. Fields. I think what they are is like what we had, which is a bulk order you get to bring to

you know, your family or bring to an event or bring to your office. I think that's their big thing and the app ties in with that. It's all about ordering like your box of four or box of 12 cookies, you know. And they have a rotating cookie selection per week. Wait, Nick, can I ask you something? Please. The Laurel Canyon one that we went to, it was like a very thin, almost like a thin book amongst a shelf of big books.

Yeah. But there was no seating. There was nowhere. Did you have seating at yours? No seating. No. That's the whole thing. It's like, it's basic.

By the way, describe my favorite type of book. Nice thin book. Give me the thick ones. Get it over with quick. Ooh, a novella. Okay. All right. Also, I want to go back to one tequila, two tequila, three tequila floor.

Yeah. So like the person, whoever is like, it takes three shots and then fucking passes out. It's cute. It's clever. It's a nice play on words. Yeah. Yeah. It's fun.

It seemed like a fucking lightweight, if you ask me. I mean, yeah, there's a reading of it where it's kind of a lightweight, but where that person's a lightweight, like exactly three shots makes them lose consciousness. But I think there's also a reading where you have three of them. They die. You start to lose count. Okay. No, not that they die.

That means that you're like, I've had three tequilas. Whoa, I've lost count. And eventually I'm on the floor, you know? Because one drink leads to many more. And maybe then that's an opportunity though. You know. Yeah. And they're like.

You know what I'm saying? Like, do you know the Dorothy Parker? I like to have a martini, too, at the very most. After three, I'm under the table. After four, I'm under my host. Oh, that's great. That's a fun. That's really clever.

That's a little big for a chocolate. That's a great book. That's why they do the one tequila, two tequila, three tequila floor. Who's Dorothy Parker? A writer. She's good. Oh my, she's good. We get talked over.

We're going to shorten it up. Get it on the shot glass. But it's good. Just annotated. So, so yeah, they, they're not designed for like dining on premises. They're designed for like, they're basically like a fucking, going to an apopajon. It felt like that. Walk in.

Here's a register. We're going to hand you your thing. Get the fuck out of here. You know, not that they were inhospitable. Everyone there was lovely. Everyone there was very nice, but they were busy and they were just churning out boxes of cookies. I.

Our friend and ease was excited. Yes. I think he was saying that there is one coming to the Americana. It feels like a popular place. It feels like, it feels like younger people like it. But I also do think it's like a mom and dad sort of story. Right. Like this is like, we're getting crumble cookies for whatever.

Jared's birthday. Jared. Jared. Jared from Subway's birthday. We're getting him crumble cookies. Bring him, bring him to him in the joint. But like, it feels like that is like, this is like fancy. It feels like sprinkles, but it feels, I felt old when I came in here.

I, there, the three of the three of the head gum staff. Yes. Katie and Ali and, and, uh, Anya and Anya never had it. And then, uh, uh, Ali loved it and Katie, I'm sorry, Ali hated it. And Katie loved it. And I was like, I don't even know it. I, like, I feel separated from it. It feels, it feels new and cool.

And I don't think I'm a part of, of what's going on with this. I definitely heard of this and I, but, but it, like, I hadn't had it. And again, it's kind of a piece with insomnia cookies, which I think emerged around the same time and it's had similar sort of growth. I don't know. There's just like a, it's kind of a cookie Renaissance. I kind of speculate that a lot of this because it happened like during COVID when people just got less worried about carbs.

And we're just like, you know what's comforting a fucking buttery, sugary cookie. Um, but I don't know. Uh, what? Yeah. Happy 420, everyone. Check out your watch. Oh shit.

It's 420. All right, dude. Oh, yeah. Oh shit. Yeah, we're going to keep doing this until we dance. We're doing peace signs. Oh, it's over. It's over.

I think like for, when you were talking about Mary, when you were talking about Mary, Mary Jane, when you were talking about sharper image, this has that kind of feel to it too. Yeah. And I miss talking with people at a register. I really like that kind of customer service where if you're using an app or you're using a kiosk for all of your ordering, um, I don't know, it makes me a little sad because I'd like to connect with that person

on the other side. Yeah. Look, I agree with you. I like that. You are right. There's one cookie, two cookie, three cookie floor, which is kind of, it's not great, but it's all right. It is kind of, it is kind of like a sharper image slash Daffy.

Well, you know, you know, we did get it. It's a good joke. Dorothy Parker, eat your heart out. Yeah. You know what we did get is cover your cookies, which is a card game. So it kind of is like one of these, what is the Daffy one that everyone knows? You said it before.

Uh, Spencer's gift? Spencer's. So it is, there is, there is like a little Spencer's gift vibe to it. If you can get a little, I think there's just this, I think this is it as far as that kind of merch goes, but yes, there is like, I don't know the fuck this works. Okay. So where did this is too complicated to play, but there's little like,

you know, there's little tokens. You can punch out a cardboard and then there's a bunch of cards. This is a plus 30, plus 30 mixing. This is the shit's like magic. The gathering enhance, add this wildcard to your top, your batch of cookies. Wow. There's some sort of pretty elaborate gameplay here that I thought we could maybe figure out on the fly, but it's maybe got too much going on.

But let's talk about the cookies. And before we get into these specific cookies, I do want to ask, because this is the 420 episode. You are experts on, on all things related to 420. Is, are you okay? My knee popped. You heard that. You're sitting down.

Are you all right? I need to, that was quite the pop right there. I don't know what happened. Did you have three tequilas? The floor is next to you. Oh, fuck. It is the, like, how, where do cookies rank in the hierarchy of like, munchies snacks?

Very, very, very high. Wow. Yeah. What do you think, Mike? I agree, but I was hoping you would say more so I could think for a moment. Oh. I'll say, you know what? For me, it was always like, like, I liked, I, I mean,

I love Cool Ranch Doritos anyways, but I liked, like, the, like, crunch and the saltiness of Cool Ranch Doritos. Yeah. I don't, I, I gave cookies a hard time and everyone got bad at me, and then I admitted that cookies are good. I said cookies aren't good. Cookies are good. Oh, can I ask a question speaking on that?

Yeah, of course. I know that the commissioner put the kibosh on cookies for Christmas. Yes. But is 420 a cookie holiday? Do you mind if I ask? No, I, I'm glad that you asked. It's a great question. Maybe, maybe this is the holiday that beats out Christmas.

I think there's, I think 420 is a cookie holiday. I mean, I think in where cookies exist in the like pantheon of munchies, like they're, they're top notch. I would say they're number one. Wow. Number one. Yeah. Above chips, above pizza.

More than chips. Oh, hell yes. A warm cookie, like you can just go and grab one of those Pillsbury logs, hack it up, throw that in the oven, feel like you've actually accomplished something. You can just grab a bag of tates, you know, chips of hoi. Grabbing a bag of tates, I love that. I've been out of the game for a long time, like I said, but chips are way up there for me.

I get pizza. I love pizza. And I think that is like, let's order pizza or whatever. Yeah. Like, uh, that sucks. That's a different category though, because that's a, that's like a meal. I just felt hacky. I was like, let's order pizza.

I did a voice. And I was like, that sucks. Like it's not. That's how I ordered pizza. I know it's like to get high, but I'm like, but I'm saying like, but pizza is like heavy and like. Yeah. That's fucking hacky.

That's like Michelangelo. You're just like Michelangelo. I am. The artist? The artist. Uh, just because of the green and then, uh, wait, how am I dressed like Michelangelo? The head shape.

And also, I hang around with a rat. Qualic. Qualic is my master splinter. He does know karate. Seriously. That's just the turtles had squinted dress up as the noid. What were you saying? The national anthem.

Um, I, to me, I've been out of the game for a while. Yeah. But I always went salty over sweet for munchies. I did. Look, I, I'm trying to. I think, I think that's no, I think that's fair. Yeah. What were we going to say?

I just a thing of Ben and Jerry's is going to take it over chips. Anytime. And like, oh, what's the cookie dough one? Uh, half baked. Half baked. Oh, over, I'll take that over. We've talked about it before. That's a great call.

It's the best. Half baked is the best. Yeah. Yeah. I wish, yeah. I wish I was more of a savory boy, but I agree. I think cookies are tops. Here's the other thing I will say, and this is part of the case

that, that 420 has for being designated as a cookie holiday. There exists the concept of a marijuana cookie. Like you can have a cookie that has weed baked into. Hold on a second. Isn't, can't you have a marijuana everything now? Like you can do marijuana pizza. You can, but then, but there's, there's like the stuff that's like kind of done too. Is Emma nodding a lot?

Yeah. Yeah. She's ordering a marijuana pizza. Mara and Arowana. Is that, is that really? It should be. If it's not. That's trademark.

It could happen. I think that's, I'm, you can both speak to this better. I think that's true. But I think there's, there's a difference between like the stuff that's kind of like, you know, common and the stuff that's like, oh, wow, you can do this now. You know what I mean? Like I, I, I feel like a, like a, there's weed with, there's fettuccine alfredo with weed in it.

Like that's not like a first thing you think of when you think of like a weed snack, but I don't know. Well, it's cause like the easiest thing that you learn to do when you're learning to make anything with weed in it is make your own weed butter because it, it needs to, so the THC actually binds with fats and that's why brownies and cookies and all that kind of stuff is like the 101 of baking. And so, you know, the first thing that you learn to make when you're baking any kind of edibles is, yeah, delicious chocolate chip cookie or brownie.

It's, um, yeah, it's synonymous with stoner culture. Wow. Do you ever, have you ever had a pot brownie before? No. I had edibles. I've had edibles. I've never had a pot brownie. Fuckin' Zenga.

Yeah. My friend Zenga. He made pot brownies. Well, let's say his first name, Joe. Paul's, Paul Zenga. Okay, sorry. We were up at Ramondi's house and he made pot brownies and it was like each, but I had just a thing of, like it was like a nugget of weed and they were like so poorly made

and I ate them and I like lost my mind. And Ramondi found me in a bedroom with the lights off and I said to him, help me. He makes fun of me for it to this day, uh, from something when I was 19 years old. Uh, but I don't, I don't do weed food anymore. I mean, I like, I never do it at all, basically. Snoop Dogg doesn't even. Doesn't fuck with it? Doesn't fuck with edibles.

He, I think it was the Alana Glazer and Abbey Jacobson were on like some show with him and I think Alana tried to give him a weed cooking. He was like, ah, no man, I don't fuck with that. Cause it's truly, it's a psychedelic at a certain point. The way it like passes through your body is different from smoking it. And so especially if you ingest too much, it lasts longer and it's really powerful and it can be like pretty uncomfortable. Yeah.

That was it for me. The two like panic attacks I've had from weed have been from edibles. Those are really unpleasant. Yeah. You, you knocked out a whole wedding party, didn't you? Yeah. He was a cabin in the Catskills. Yeah.

And I was the only one who didn't eat it cause I was cooking dinner, but everyone else just went down and it was like, you know that scene and gone with the wind where they pan back from the civil war. Oh yeah. And everyone's just lying on the ground moaning. It was like that. Except for me. One brownie.

What, what are the? Brownie, two brownie, three brownie floor. Remember the guy? This is probably shouldn't be brought up. The guy who brought in brownies to UCB class. Someone did this as a prank. Someone brought a, they was like, Hey, I brought brownies for everyone, but they had like weed in them.

And like it just like ruined an entire like class of people. Like I would kill. People's days. Yeah. I would kill someone. Yeah. And I'm also the guy who tries to eat snack or wax that are left on my front doorstep. So I'm history jar with liquid in it.

I was down to drink, but that would be so mad if that happened. Anyways, I, I, I am a, I, I, for me, it was saltiness, not sweetness, but I also, I've been out of the game for a long time and I think you're right. Cookies and ice cream or that's, that's the top of the stoner. I feel like that you're right. Like I remember getting really high before like after school during school and after school and like coming, coming home into my family's house and just like cracking open, like I think of double stuffed Oreos.

Oh, well, that's good. It's just the best. It's the best. You know what I had? I would, I would do an apple with peanut butter. I liked that quite a bit as a stoner food. It was a good fucking nark food. It is dorky to say like, I liked ants on a log.

But that's the truth. Uh, when I, so I never had this place before I was warned when, so like I said, I talked to some of the head gum staff. Yeah. Ali told me that the cookies were very cake-like, which she didn't like about it. Katie liked that about it. And so I was expecting when I ate them, I thought it was going to, they are cake-like in a way, but I said they're almost more doughy.

They're not, they're not as cakey as I expected because I've heard this as well. And yeah, I've had some very cakey cookies that's not 100% what you're getting here, but it's a thing to be conscious of. Let me talk through the roster of what we had and then we just go through our thoughts on them. And the two of you, please let me know if there's anything that we, that you got. You guys got some additional. Your own visit that we didn't have.

Yeah. But for ours, we had the milk chocolate chip, which is exactly what it sounds like. Cookie butter lava, which has the biscoff in it, the plain cookies you might have experienced. And so this is already a description of melting mouthwatering cookies stuffed with biscoff cookie butter, then drizzled with biscoff cookie butter spread and garnished with crumbly cookie butter morsels. So it's kind of got ribbons of the, you know, this biscoff throughout there. We got chocolate peanut butter featuring Oreo.

So this is, you know, three different components in here, a cinnamon roll, which has like kind of a cinnamon rolly swirl of cream, cream cheese frosting on top, strawberry cheese. And these last two cookies that I'm naming are were served cold. So these, these top four were all served warm. These two are served cold. Strawberry cheesecake, which had a graham cracker cookie, vanilla cream cheese frosting and a strawberry jam on top. And then a classic pink sugar, which is kind of like a plus step version of the grocery

store cookie. It's a vanilla sugar cookie with a pink swoop of real almond frosting. So almond frosting. So that's what we had here. Mary, Mary Jane, you are allergic to peanuts specifically. Correct. Is that your one allergy? And penicillin.

And penicillin. Wow. How, how limiting is it to be like, cause especially you're talking about desserts. I feel like peanuts probably are snuck into a lot of them. Yeah. I have definitely a swole right up after having some bites that I didn't know contained peanuts. Oh God. Yeah.

It looks great for like a minute. Oh, like your lips are real. Yeah. Like I get a kind of like a bee stung look for like a minute and then the neck expands and then that's the jab of the hot moment and then just not good. That's so scary. That's so scary. I just feel bad that we were like, Nick and I were really laying into you to try the peanut

peanut butter cookie. I mean, I almost did. You were very persuasive. But yeah, that's the only one I didn't try. Have you ever had us, what are they called? The shot? Like the pulp fiction shot? Yes.

EpiPen. Yeah. Not to the heart, but to the thigh. Wow. For sure. For sure. Yeah. I don't know if it's the exact same thing from pulp fiction.

The adrenaline shot. The adrenaline shot. Into the heart, I believe. Yes. A little different. Yeah. The Eric Stoltz. That's right.

Yeah. Needle into the heart. That's right. I was going to take people when the Quincy guys came here, I was going to take them on a pulp fiction tour and then we never did it. It's a great idea. Yeah. But there are a couple spots.

Do you know where to go? Not really. I mean, that was part of the issue. I thought Jackrabbit Slims was like a real place and it's not. It's totally made up for the movie. There's a couple of spots. There's spots that are like. There are a couple spots.

Yeah. There's one not far from me. The place where, actually the one that he hit, there's that one spot where Ving Reims gets hit by the car. That's right. I think that's right near Foster's Freeze. Oh, wow. Okay.

That's right next to Foster's Freeze. That's cool. Whoa. What about your Gimp basement? Hey, he's good at dancing. I don't want, I don't, I don't, I don't want, oh, damn it. I was going to say I don't want to give out Wiger's address, but you had already said about me.

Looks like the Spoon Man's caught a fly. Let's start with the milk chocolate. Did they even say that or is that just the Simpsons? That's the Simpsons. Yeah. They don't even say it. No, no, he does say it. He calls somebody like a spider's got a couple of flies.

Yeah. Okay. He does, he does say it in the movie. Milk chocolate chip is, let's start there because we had this and we were like. We make, besides dressing up as a noy, we also put the ball gag in Qualic's mouth and make him dress up as the Gimp. Still singing. You can kind of hear it mumbling through the ball.

So to sound like a zoomer for a second, we had this milk chocolate chip and I think we were all kind of like, this is mid. And then Mitch, you had the genius idea to heat this up in the microwave. Dude, then just like a zoomer, I was like, dude, let's use some technology. And I said, let's put this thing in them. Let's nuke this thing. When you warmed it up a little bit, this went up like a full, like a full fork and a half. Yeah.

Like this was so much better warm. One full cookie grate at least. Yeah. Yeah. We gooey so soft and chewy. And this is actually at the end of our meal, but it came when you told me, the idea came to me when you said that the cookies on the left were from the warm, like they were the warm tray or whatever.

And I was like, oh, are these, and I guess maybe they are served warm, right? Like a... No, yeah. They're certain there's a subset of them that are served warm and there's a subset that are served chilled that come out of the fridge. And it did make me wonder how the rest of them would taste heated up after the fact. I was like, man, would this have made a difference on all of these cookies? I think it would have made a great difference on the cookie butter lava biscoff.

Yeah, that's a good call. Cookie because on the chocolate chip cookie, I did get like a moment of molten hot chocolate on my lip and had that nice, you know, microwave melting moment. I did think about how it would have affected the cookie butter lava and if that would have benefited from being hot. Yeah. That said, the cookie butter lava, I did enjoy quite a bit. I thought that was a decent cookie.

I thought it was decent. That was on my lower end for me, though. When I was eating these, like for my first bite was one of the cold ones, the pink frosting one that's like we were saying is kind of like trying to be like their version of a like a grocery store cookie. Yeah. And Mike, you liked it and I did not like it at first, but I went back in for another for another bite and I did like it.

But that was the one where I was like, this is very doughy. Like a few of them are like do have like a like a very doughy taste to them, not even cakey cakey. I would but like almost like we were saying like almost slightly undercooked, but I kind of came around on them too. But at first I was like, what is this? Well, that's replicating the real the the inspiration though. It is like kind of like weirdly like chewy sort of, you know, but it happened a couple

times. It wasn't just that one. There were a couple that seemed like they're like undercooked or something. And the cold ones almost seem like they're supposed to be a weirder experience that are not like your typical cookie. Yes. Those feel almost like pie. Not to get into my old thing about cupcakes and pie and all of that.

Yes. Cookies. These cookies seem like pie. But the cookies not seem like pie. Maybe the strawberry cheesecake one was kind of like kind of pie. The cold ones are kind of pie like. I mean, maybe I don't know. I get what you're getting at, but I kind of don't want to humor you.

Well, on our occasion, we tried the lemon bar cookie and that was pious texture and topping. I think I'm on to something here. The cold like the cold ones just feel like undercooked or like it feels like it's like this weird cold presentation. You were saying they're from the fridge, right? Yes. I think so.

I will say that the classic pink sugar was a probably my favorite. I thought that was delightful. Which one? Yeah. The classic pink sugar, the one you're just describing. I thought it was great. It was kind of like that grandma's after Sunday school cookie situation. Yes.

And then I wonder if there's like there's a whole category of cookies that are just fridge cookies. Like you don't actually bake them, right? Like they're prepared and then finished in the fridge. And I wonder if this is supposed to be like that. Interesting. I have no idea. Like a no bake situation.

I've never heard of that. A fridge box cookie. Really? Yeah. Oh, that's my kind of baking. Right. That sounds great. Bacon.

Hold on a second. You're excited about not having to cook and then you were also excited about baking at the end. This now makes sense to me. The like the fridge box. I'm like this, it is like, there was something different about those, about the two fridge cookies. It felt like the biting into when I looked at the way my teeth marks had like

sunk through the icing and the dough. It felt like biting into an unbaked cookie. Yes. Which I liked. And I liked the sort of like almondy sweet, like kind of marzipan flavor of the pink frosting. I did. Yeah, I did love that.

Well, I'll get to the, cause the other cold cookie. The strawberry cheese cookie. It's talking about it now. It was my favorite cookie. That one was a home run. I love that one too. That was maybe my second favorite. And I was like this elevate, like this place is now elevated in my mind.

This is like, this is, I get the hype for this cookie. This cookie alone is like worth some of the hype. Well, can I also say this is one that I approached from a place of skepticism of just kind of like, all right, strawberry cheesecake cookie. I don't know. All right. Let's see what you got. And I was like, this one, they really executed it well.

Is it not, do you not like cheesecake? I do like cheesecake. I guess I just thought this one was kind of like, like, all right. And I think I can feel like they were maybe trying too hard. It's a novelty cookie. Yeah, exactly. A novelty cookie. Yeah.

Like you might see a soul at the Sharper image. In Newfoundland. Yeah. I hope you didn't have this attitude to the poor crumbles guy. All right. Let's see what you fucking got with this thing. I, the first, actually the first cookie I had before the pink frosting one was the chocolate Oreo, chocolate peanut butter Oreo one.

Yes. And I thought that that was good, but it's almost like a cookie like that is almost unimpressive. I wish I tried to heat it up, but it's like, when it's like so chocolatey like that, I'm like, I get it. There's chocolate and peanut butter. Those are both delicious things. And if you mix them together, that's not that crazy.

I wanted to eat the little Oreo in the middle, but like, was there an Oreo taste besides that? Or is it just the little Oreo in the middle that gives you that Oreo taste? No, there were Oreo cookie pieces that were kind of baked into. Okay. And like, and I would just like, my one order of view of this one is ungepochka. Like we don't need the Oreo pieces in there too. The chocolate peanut butter is enough.

I ranked it third, but also that's because it just has flavors. I, I like it because it's chocolate peanut butter. That it tastes good, but just like the Oreo is just, it's too much. And then the Oreo on top is clunky to eat. Yeah. It's, it's awkward. The Oreo on top was, it was not worth the end. There's another thing about this place, which Casey mentioned when he came in was like,

I don't want to eat a full one of these cookies. No, like that's like who wants to eat a full. And I think Amir said that too. It's like, I don't want to eat. I don't want to eat a full cookie. And I probably ate two cookies total and that was way too much. It was like a total sugar rush. Yeah.

It's crazy. I will, I want to get Casey's thoughts on this, but I will just interject on this real quick. I think this is so much a part of crumble's identity. The idea of sharing cookies, they actually sell a, like a store brand cookie divider, like a cookie four way splitter, like a pizza cutter and which I tried to buy and they were out of it. Oh, so it's a hot item. It's a hot item. Exactly.

People go there and they know what they're going to do with the cookies. Fuck, you should have hit up sharper image. I'm sure that they have. Casey, what'd you think of those cookies? I really like the cookies. Yeah. But, but yeah, like I could only do like a bite of each of them. There were a lot.

It was like so rich. There were a lot. I don't think you can tell how big they are by looking at them anywhere, but in the store, like nowhere on my phone or on your laptop. Now, can I tell that these cookie, the dimensions are, I mean, they're like a small pizza. Yeah, they are. They're fucking big. 100%.

Cookie Monster would tap out earlier than you think. Yeah. Cookie Monster would do like two of these and he'd be like, all right. I get it. You know what I mean? Oh, we'd go from, all right. Okay. All right.

I get it. Me done now. You guys proved your point, though, boys. The count would be like one, two. You stop at two? Get the fuck out of here, count. Well, I just want to count things. Only two?

It sucks. He's just trudging back to his castle very, very deep. Fucking sucks, man. Fucking sucks. Got to at least get to four. Oh, man. And Oscar pops out holding your crumbs. He's like, it's a living.

Can I say something about the Oreo one, too? Please do. I think that the peanut butter, you were having this problem with it. The peanut butter is only in the middle of the cookie. Yeah. That's a weird choice. It's weird, right? Yeah.

It should be ratioed out so that it covers the whole thing so you can actually get the bite of it from jump. It would have helped if we had that cookie divider. Sharper Image probably sells the handless cookie divider. It's going to be a little more fancy than the fucking cookie divider. But then how do you divide the tiny, tiny Oreo? That's the issue. That's a great question.

That's a problem with this cookie. I have a separate divider that has a little hole in it, so like that one piece is intact maybe. You know what I'm saying? They have their design issues with this cookie. You did know what I was saying? Because it wasn't saying. I realize.

I do know, though. All right. All right. Good, good, good. Thank you. The Oreo cookie on top is unnecessary. I would not be surprised if that was like a brand partnership issue. Like the VSCO was like you have to put a whole Oreo cookie on this to have our brand

as part of it. But then also, but Mike, I think that point is key. If they distributed. We're so much better on a cupcake. And that's what they took it from. We're better on a cupcake. Yeah. It's like when there's an Oreo cupcake, we're like, oh, that's cute.

And you beat it. And then this one is like, I told you, I was like trying to get, I was trying to get to the center of it because I want to eat it. And I was like, this was worth, this wasn't worth. Doesn't make any sense for it just to be there like the Earth's core. And then I would say that the other thing, like you were saying, Mike, like the classic pink sugar cookie, if they distributed that peanut butter evenly over the entire surface area, then that would have been a much better bite.

But here you were getting a bunch of inconsistent bites. Let's see. Have I missed anyone's thoughts on any of these cookies we talked about so far? Milk chocolate, cookie butter, lava, chocolate peanut butter, strawberry cheesecake, classic pink sugar. Well, we haven't. Have we talked about the cinnamon? That's the last one.

I just, before we get to that one, was there anything else? Any other thoughts anyone had? I would only add the two that we tried separately from this before we'd maybe get into that one. Would that be okay? Yeah, go for it. Because we tried one that was like carrot cake. And I don't know how you all feel about carrot cake, but that is a great cookie.

Wow. Okay. I'm surprised. Yeah. Yeah, we, like I bit into it and my face lit up and then like Mike was like, oh, that's like you got your nut with that one. Like that was. Wow.

Your nose did. Yeah. My nose bleeding. Your nose bleeding. Were you guys high when you got them? Very. Are you high today? Always.

Yeah. Shout out to your parking lot. I don't want to say more, but we lit it up. I thought you were saying like that gave you anxiety because I was like, oh, I can see that being like if you were high, getting into that parking lot is scary. Oh, I didn't. Yeah. I did.

I did adjust my parking twice. I was emailing you both her resume right now. And then the other one we had was the oatmeal raisin and the double chocolate. Yeah. And you had big thoughts about the oatmeal raisin. It was this, it was, I don't want to say disgusting, but it was disgusting. Do you like oatmeal raisin? I got a lot of shit for sticking up for oatmeal raisin.

Remember, because my grandma used to make them and I like picked it in the cookie draft and I got shit for it. I don't love oatmeal raisin, but I can respect it. I love an oatmeal chocolate chip and I love a regular oatmeal. I don't like the oatmeal chocolate chip. But I was going to say, but you saying that you like oatmeal raisin a lot. You love oatmeal raisin, but their version of oatmeal raisin was disgusting. What happened?

It was, it's a ratio thing again. Yeah. Because the frosting on top, thank you for it, Nick, was, do you guys get that one? Oh boy. All right. Got to work my after-school oaky shit. Lord. You and a bunch of 15-year-old kids.

I'm also 15. It was, again, it was just too thick of a frosting. Yeah. To the, I need to do a correction. There was no raisins in it. I just checked our notes, but it's just an oatmeal cookie. I just wanted it to be accurate. But yeah, it was a ratio.

It was a gross amount of frosting to oatmeal. Oh man. That's a bummer. Wags. All right. It's a big load. You and the pump host boys. Pump host boys buying you a perverted book here at Head Gum that they promote.

Sorry, the Tom Wolf book. It's part of our chat below. There wasn't a cookie I disliked. I know that you guys like the Bischoff. The Bischoff. Oh yeah. The Eric Bischoff brand cookie. The Bischoff, right?

Bischoff. The Bischoff cookie. That was like the closest to the one where I was like, eh, it's fine. But for me, I gave my top three cookies and the third was that the chocolate Oreo one. But when we nuked the chocolate chip cookie, it maybe slid into that third spot. It really did a world of difference for it. But my number two was the one we haven't mentioned. Was the cinnamon roll.

The cinnamon roll is like, it's like a brown sugar kind of base on top of the, the like, I guess it's just kind of a default sweet base cookie. Like I don't know. I think it's maybe just a sugar cookie. And then it's got a cream cheese frosting swirled on top of that. Here's the thing. I would say I liked that one, but I like bikes note on the oatmeal cookie. I kind of feel like there was so much of that cream cheese frosting that the bites varied

so much depending on how much frosting I was getting to brown sugar. I liked it a lot. I thought it was good. The cinnamon flavor on it was, and I did like that frosting. I think you're right that it is, I wish maybe it was just spread on top of the whole cookie. Yeah. Yeah. Because when you get a great cinnamon roll and you go to Cinnabon and you pull one end

off, it's got every aspect of everything. Oh man. Every single bite. Good point. Good point. And that's like, I had to really go in to get all of the sort of frosting and cinnamon and cookie in one bite. It took me a minute.

I want to know how that would have tasted heated up too. Now, I don't know how warm they are when they deliver them. Nick, you maybe know, or you guys maybe know more than I do. They weren't super warm. Yeah. Like, but like they were put, like I got there, they had my order and like I had my window and I got there and like when I checked in, they started assembling it. It wasn't like, here it is, let me hand it over to you.

It's coming out as fresh as they can get it. What else did we just figure out too? What was the thing that we heated up just recently is, I think we were still doing a remote at this point, but there was something that we got and then we heated it up in the microwave and they, and it was better. I forget what the episode was. I mean, that could be anything. It's very.

But it was similar. It was like a cookie. It was like kind of like a desserty thing. Oh, well, who gives a shit? I don't remember. This place truly feels like an office cookie place because you heat up, right? You go on a break, you're maybe working at your desk and you want to break and you cut off a little sliver and throw in the microwave, heat it up, have yourself a nice treat.

Like this feels like a communal cookie, which I like because if we didn't do that today, we wouldn't have had the opportunity to know that they taste a lot better heated up. Yeah, they do. They really do. Yeah. Huge difference. Yeah. Can I add one more thing from our experience that was made my eyes go blind?

They had no napkins. Did you have napkins? No napkins. No. You didn't have napkins either. It was wild. I bet if I had asked for them, they could have given them to you. They're like, take this and walk out.

We asked. Yeah. They had none. No way. Yeah, yeah. We had to go to Jersey Mike's next door. Jersey Mike's coming through again. Yep.

Jersey Mike saved the day. I got you covered. Yeah. That's Jersey Mike. We also, we sent some crumble cookies to Sus. We did. Which he was jokingly, like joking like he was getting, before this episode, he was joking that he was going to come in to the studio today.

Was he? I didn't see that. All right. See you then. That's what he said. Like when we were talking about it, he was like, see you then. And we laughed at it. I don't know if you saw it.

But we sent them some, some crumble cookies. And he had a great line likes. And I think that we crumbled them. Remember? Oh, you're saying I had a great line. Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah.

I said he's getting crumbled. He's getting crumbled. I think they should use that. I think it's good. You just got crumbled. Yeah. You just got crumbled. I'm just saying crumbles watching.

That's pretty good. If there was an ad campaign where they're kind of like, like, like the happy Honda days thing where they like surprise someone with something new, with something nice with something that's done. Yeah. Like they show up, they knock on someone and they're like, is everything okay? It's like, yeah, just here you go. You just got crumbled.

That's good. That's good as hell. Dang. That rules. That would be cool. I'll crumble for you. That works too. Anyways, I'm just saying there's a lot of things you could do here.

Yeah. Anyway, I. Royal crumble. That's great. Eat a lot of different cookies. I was going to say, you'd kind of like drop them on people. I'm overhead. This is great.

Maybe. I, for, I guess this is my thing with this chain. I don't still know what they are and this is my fault because I've actually never been in one. I don't do this often, but I'd never have been in one sometimes. You know, and some, I feel like this is the type of place that you don't have to go in. You can't actually even eat in the place. A lot of their business is based off of delivery.

So I don't think, I think this is, again, I'll say Papa John's. It's like, I, you can have, have had a lot of Papa John's without ever setting foot inside a Papa John's store and feel like you have a take on it. I think that's the same with crumble. Look, we, we, we have, we have to get to our four scores. So let's take a break and we'll be right back and let you know how we feel about crumble right here on dough boys. Wow.

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box when you go to wildgrain.com slash dough boys to start your subscription. You heard me, free croissants in every box and $30 off your first box when you go to wildgrain.com slash dough boys. It's wildgrain.com slash dough boys or you can use promo code dough boys at checkout. Do it. Welcome back to dough boys. It's time for our fork scores, but Mitch, before we get to that, earlier you were trying to figure out.

Yes. We were recording an episode and all you know is that you heated something up. You know it was a remote record. You heated something up and then it was better. Yes. I think it might have been Nothing Bunt Cakes. That's what it was, wasn't it? I think it was.

I think it was Nothing Bunt Cakes. Who do we do Nothing Bunt Cakes? Whoa. I'm not even going to try to say it again. Who do we do Nothing Bunt Cakes with? Nothing Bunt Cakes, our guests. Let me look it up real quick. Did I say the C word?

I think he's like the G. Of course, our friend Becky Feldman was on with Nothing Bunt Cakes. That was a lot of fun. Yeah. Love Becky. Yeah. Love Becky. You know what kind of similar in a way?

Here's my last question before we get to this fork scores. Do the cookies crumble enough? Are you satisfied with the crumble? They're not super crumbly, are they? They're not super crumbly. They're not super crumbly. I brought the question up for a reason. Well look, here's what we'll do.

Crossfire. We'll each go around, we'll give a closing argument if you will regarding this particular chain crumble on this great day of 4.20 and give it a score from zero to five, blunts. Mary Jane, we'll start with you. I would like to give crumble a score of three blunts. Taking off points for no interaction with the people who I wanted to talk to because I like to talk to the people, no napkins and no seating and also very little crumbling. Yeah, it's a great point.

They're called crumble. You would expect some crumbling and there's minimal crumbling. Minimal crumbling. Minimal crumbling. Did you ever go on your lap? Did you ever throw a hand across your lap to get it rid of crumb? I brushed off my left breast pocket at one point very briefly. Okay.

That's something. That's something, yeah. But I think three for me. Wow. This is funny because I thought you guys were going to be in the golden play club and now the pressure is off. Yeah. The pressure is off.

Okay. Three blunts for Mary Jane. Mike, your thoughts, your fork score or blunt score? Blunt score. Yeah. Mary Jane, it's so interesting you say that because I would have agreed with you because of inconsistency from store to store. Our experience together at the Laurel Canyon location was not as great as today's from

the Culver City location, which tells me that maybe they expanded too quickly and cut a couple of corners and ingredients when it comes to having consistency across the country. That being said, heating up that chocolate chip cookie today, eating the pink frosted, eating the cheesecake again was delicious and sharing it and making friends by sharing a cookie, I can't understate that enough. So I'm actually going to go from what I was going to give three blunts to now four blunts. Wow. Wow.

Blunts. All right. Very good score. I'm sweating. All right, Spoon Man. Apologies for saying gunt. I want to start off with that. Good to say it again in the apology.

Nothing gunt cakes is what I said. What's harder to say? Bunt or calm? Bunt, I think straight up, bunt is easier. Bunt. But nothing bunt cakes. Nothing bunt cakes. And you know what?

I kind of hate the name of nothing bunt cakes. Nothing bunt cakes. Prumbl cookies I'm more okay with. Nothing bunt cakes. I never thought about that, but I don't like the name. Nothing bunt cakes. Nothing bunt cakes. That sucks.

Then we're also starting Utah? Is that a play on work? I don't understand it. Yeah, I think it's like nothing but cakes, but like, but also what is that? Do they sell anything other than bunt cakes? Las Vegas. No, it's just bunt cakes. Oh, they're very, they are super, they're just focused on bunt cakes as crumble as on

cookies. Okay. Yeah. Kind of your kind of joke, huh, Mary Jane? I appreciate that. Yeah. Yeah. You know, a little word play.

Love it. That's fun. Cookies are good. I apologize for that as well. I've said the cookies aren't good in the past. Cookies are good. This place seems like the new, it seems like the flavor of the month. And I say that it's like the flavor of the four years or something.

It's going to be popular for like four or five years, but I see the same ending here as I do for sprinkles in a way, like, uh, maybe it will be a lot last longer. Maybe it'll be more popular, but I, but I don't know. I feels like the dessert turnaround for like mainstream chains is just, it feels like they never last. Pinkberry. Who would have thought pinkberry would be kind of on the outs? It is.

People lined up for an hour for fucking pinkberry. For pinkberry. It's impossible to like, like imagine now, but that was such an LA hotspot when I first opened. For pinkberry. For fucking pinkberry. And this crumble, it feels like it's kind of like the popular thing. I also didn't know much about it, but I'm going off the cookies here, Wags.

And some of those cookies were really good. Some of them were good when we nuked that, that, uh, that chocolate chip cookie. It was great. Yeah. Um, and that pink frosting on that, I think that was like my fourth favorite. It was, it was good. I even liked the chocolate Oreo one. Okay.

But there was two that like, for me, the cinnamon roll one and the, and the strawberry cheesecake one were like, Oh, these are like really good golden plate club level cookies. Now as a whole, is the chain, uh, golden plate club? No, not for me. Wow. Sorry, Mike. Um, what's the, what's the, what'd be the weed equivalent of the golden plate club? The golden.

Dube. Club. Yeah. You took it. I was going to say golden. Dube. Club. Okay.

Golden. Dube. So it's not getting in the golden. Dube. Club. Unfortunately. Thank you, Mike. Yeah.

Thank you for lying and saying that. That's what you were thinking because I thought it could be like golden bowl club, like a plate, like a bowl, like your smoke, a bowl, but then that would probably make us think of the bowl tournament a little bit. It makes you think of the bowl tournament. The golden. Dube. Golden.

Dube. Club is better. Yeah. Golden. Dube. Club. Dube. Club is pretty good.

Golden. Dube. Because gold nuggets exist. Yeah. Yeah. Or maybe you're thinking too much of the casino. Yeah, maybe our chicken McNuggets. Mm hmm.

Yeah. Yeah. You're probably thinking of chicken nuggets. Probably golden. Dube. Club. Is there any listener wasn't the podcast is not thinking of chicken nuggets, like just constantly.

Sorry folks, I had to make fun of you too. I think that. I don't think it gets into the golden. Club. Mm hmm. I think it I think that the some of those cookies are were like, oh, this delivers. This is. Two of those cookies are as hyped.

The other ones are like, okay. And my thought is if I think what I thought this place was for is like mom and dad bringing cookies to the kids fucking. Hey, the kids are the kids are watching the Royal Rumble. Let's let's bring him some crumbles. That rhymed a little bit. Like for that reason, bring it to a party. Yes.

Making kids excited, cutting them up, sharing the cookies for that reason. I think that it's maybe a good spot. But for me, I can't go above a 3.5. Why 3.5 forks. Blunts. Fuck. 3.5 blunts. Yeah.

Actually, you know what? Three blunts. Wow. 3.5 blunts. Wow. Yeah. Wow. What is that?

What is it? Three. Three blunts and a. Roach. Not the bug roach. A bunch of listeners went, huh. Three blunts and one. Half smoked wet blunt.

A bunch of our listeners are jumping up on their counters. Bad news for the counters. Wigs. As I was going, working my way through the bites of these six cookies, I started with kind of like, okay, you know, I didn't see what this place is doing. And then I was kind of, for a few of these bites, I was like, oh. Okay. And I, at first stretch, I was like, I think we might have another entrant in the

Golden Plate Club. Now, this was before we knew about the Golden Dube Club. So that's, those are the perms I was putting it in my head. The Golden Nugget Club. What is it? Dube Club. Oh, it is the Golden Dube Club. I forgot already.

Yeah. No, we went back to Golden Dube Club. All right. Yeah. But then I had some of the, then I worked my way back through the roster and the feeling started to decline a little bit because as high as the highs were, I do feel like some of the other cookies were underperforming for the price point. And I also have to say, Mrs. Fields was brought up earlier.

And I kind of feel like as cookie chains go, this is kind of like that moment when, you know, Jeopardy was airing still in syndication and who wants to be a millionaire came out for the first time. And everyone's watching who wants to be a millionaire. It's like the sensation on network TV. And Alex Trebek was just kind of like, they're doing well now. Let's see where they are in 10 years. And he was fucking right.

Cause you know what Jeopardy endured and who wants to be a millionaire kind of just, it's a syndicated version now, but it has nowhere near the cultural relevance it once did. And certainly has never surpassed Jeopardy and the cultural consciousness. And I feel like that's the same fucking place Mrs. Fields is looking at crumble right now. I think Mrs. Fields is going to endure and I think crumble will recede. She's number one on my list. If I could marry Mrs. Fields, I would fuck in. I would have it made.

And probably the stock would drop. I think I would maybe Mrs. Fields out of house and home. I was going to say Trebek is a fucking alpha Canadian, huh? Yeah, he was great. He's a fucking alpha Canadian. I doubt this place is staying power. I think it's a little bit flash of the pan. I would do the dimensions of its tick-tock explosion has me thinking that even more so.

Oh, I didn't even know this. But maybe, well, Mike said it like three times. Are you listening to our guests? He was next to me. It's hard to, I see you guys. Before this happened, you heard a bird in Emma's zoom through her window. It's true. That is true.

Excellent hearing. It is true. It was a very specific bird that. What does it sound like? Again, I've never gotten Emma. I'll make sure it plays in the background of the whole episode. Don't worry. Okay, good.

Yeah, try to try it because it's a specific bird sound. And then it maybe isn't a California bird because you didn't because I was doing the call of it and you didn't know. I didn't recognize it. I didn't hear you say that. I didn't realize it was a tick-tock trend. That is part of it. But I also feel like, you know, what is the trend? What do they do?

They just go to trouble. They just show the cookies on tick-tock, I think. And they've got cookie drops every Sunday night so that everyone gets excited about that week's flavors. Right. And that's another thing. That is smart. It's smart marketing. It's effective marketing.

Is that novelty going to endure? I don't know. I feel like I could see like a year from now people are not as excited about the tick-tock weekly cookie drop. Yeah. But, you know, they're doing well for themselves. I mean, you're going to run out of cookies, too. In a year, it's going to be like, we got the lettuce cookie Monday. Yeah.

You're like, I want the fucking lettuce cookie. You want the fucking lettuce cookie? You want my turtle? I don't want that shit. Get out of here. I think this place is good, but I like, I don't know if it's Golden Dube Club, but material quite yet. And we'll see if it sticks around. We'll see if it has the cultural imprint of even insomnia cookies, which I think I still prefer.

But I did have some good cookies. So for that reason, I'll go three blunts and one roach. Or I saw wet half-blunt. Yeah, wet half-blunt. Perfect. Great. Great. Well, no Golden Play Club for Old Crumble.

No Golden Dube Club for Old Crumble, but I think a good outing and I think we were impressed by some of its wares. I would love to just give a shout out to the toothsomeness of the bite through that pink sugar cookie. That was so good. And like the impression that I saw of my teeth in the cookie was just extremely pleasurable. So I might have given it a higher rating if I talked more about the cookies and less about the lack of napkins. Yeah, that impression, the little one we were talking about. It was like soft in that way where I was like, I don't know at first, but the impression that it left was great. Yeah, I think it was going on that napkin shortage, the oaky team in the back.

The impression that I left made me think of the mighty, mighty boss stones. Oh, yeah. One of my first concerts. I figured out what I heated up in the microwave. What was it? It was Krispy Kreme. When we reviewed it with Sam Sanders. Sam Sanders, yes.

You know what? Krispy Kreme kind of reminds me of this. They're weirdly kind of similar. You get a big box of Krispy Kreme, you cut them up. I don't even want a full Krispy Kreme donut, but they'll be a hit at a party. I kind of feel the same way. What would you rather have someone bring? Like, hey, I got this big tray of 12 crumble or I got a thing of 12 hot glaze from Krispy Kreme.

That is truly a hard question. I think I might take the donuts. I think I maybe would go Krispy Kreme. Yeah. Especially you could get more than just the regular, like whatever. Yeah, let's say it's just a dozen donuts or a dozen cookies. I think that I would maybe rather have just bites of the donuts. Yeah.

I know that if I were going to rock into a wombful of... If I were going to walk into a roomful of friends who I knew had been smoking all day and I was going to offer them something, it would be Krispy Kreme over crumble. Over crumble. So, is donut maybe the dark horse... Wow. Vanity. Whoa, yes.

Yep. Yeah. Might be. Well... You know that I love... Dickie was a very nice man every time I met her, but like the Boston's and like other... Like other like... You know of this.

People who were like... People who didn't want to get the vaccine, like the vaccine denier people started a ban. Yeah, there's like an anti-vax Scott Punk supergroup, which is a little... Hopefully no one from real big fish is in it. They might be. They might be. Oh, is it like no VX instead of no... That's our dough boys joke of the day.

That got us good. I was also... There's a lot of headgun people in here and there was like multiple times where they were laughing so loud out there and I was like, man, what's going on out there? That's so funny instead of fucking in here. They just look at us in here and Mike and Mary Jane are like fucking straight faced. They're having more fun outside the studio, Yikes. The show sucks.

The show sucks. The show sucks. I wanted to pivot from... Not by the fault of our great guests. But terrific guests. Having an absolute blast today. I want to pivot from sweet stuff to savory for our segment. I've got a food stuff we're going to decide if it's worth putting in your mouth.

It's snack or whack and we had some options. I crowd sourced with Amelia and Emma who are younger than me and know more about weed culture and asked for some wrecks for munchies and they had some great options. But what I ended up landing with was... These must have been hard to find people who are younger than you, Yikes. What I ended up with was a couple of classic snacks that we've never tasted on the podcast. I looked it up. We have two of my childhood favorites, Chicken in a Biscuit and Nabisco Better Cheddar.

That's right. I've got some throwback snacks. It's Throw Snack Thursday. So I'm going to open these up and we can circulate these. Have the two of you ever had Chicken in a Biscuit slash Better Cheddar? I have not. Same. Never had either cookie.

Better Cheddar's I've had. I feel like I've tasted Chicken in a Biscuit before, but that was not a normal snack for me. The other ones... I'm going to open this in pasta. The other ones weren't a normal snack for me, but I definitely have tried Better Cheddar's. Casey, have you ever had any experience with a Better Cheddar or Chicken in a Biscuit? Never had Better Cheddar, but I believe I've tried Chicken in a Biscuit before, but it's been a long time. I'm trying not to wrinkle these too much into the microphone.

Apologize to any of our listeners with mesophonia, which is real, which people have. Yeah, sure. It's real, all right. I have mesophonia. I just want to remind the Doughboys that it's real. My life's been really hard with mesophonia. My model slash NASA working life. Anytime I have mesophonia problems, she comes home and she takes care of me.

She leaves NASA. She comes and helps me out. I write these emails. I did not think I was going to like these at all, but I'll say what I think. That doesn't seem appealing, Chicken in a Biscuit. So they have a weird chicken flavoring to them. They don't seem like they should work. I don't know if they have any actual chicken in them.

I don't think they do, but it's like an artificial flavor. It's kind of a wavy shape to the cracker. It's like chicken dust. Yeah, it's kind of like a poultry seasoning. It's like the strong flavoring of it. You know what it is? It's like chicken noodle soup that whatever the spices in chicken noodle soup are. I don't know what they are, but like chicken broth tastes.

Yes. And the better cheddars are, they're a little bit easier to wrap your head around. They are like a thinner wafer and they are circular as opposed to the form factor of a Cheez-It. These are all very interesting first experiences. Also, did you say these are cookies? Would these be considered a cookie or a cracker? These are supposed to be crackers. Did they call them cookies?

He did. I might have said cookie by mistake. Yes. But I didn't want to, okay. I thought I knew what a cracker was. Better cheddars are like, we have Cheez-It's at home. You know how kids say that nowadays. Like we got Cheez-It's at home as better cheddars.

Yep. You know what I'm saying? Yes. They're light. They got a decent cheddar taste to them. But I mean, come on, give me a fucking Cheez-It. You just want a Cheez-It. Oh, you want a Cheez-It.

And then the chicken one, I just wanted a Ritz. Oh, see, I love the chicken one. You do. Whatever that seasoning is, is pretty addictive to me. Like that umami, savory, salty chicken flavoring is delicious. Like for me, that's a big time snack. It even says snack on the box. I have to agree with the chicken in a biscuit box.

Snack time for sure. I think they're both snacks, but I also have nostalgia working for me. But I'm honestly surprised they even still make better cheddars. I was just going to get chicken in a biscuit and then I saw the better cheddars and I was like, well shit, these are still around. Let's see how they hold up. They are, I do like how thin they are. Like that to me is part of the fun of eating them.

You both feel like you got them from the 99 cent store or something. It seems like they would be hard to get a hold of now. For sure. Chicken in a biscuit. Fucking Ralph's. Wow. I was there looking for popcorn and there was a brand of popcorn that Amelia and I had recommended. But the flavors they had there were all kind of like, they were like sweet already.

And I was like, let's have something savory just to mix it up. Good choice. What was the popcorn brand? Can you tell us? I'll look it up. Emma probably knows. Smart food. Smart food, that's right.

Thank you. You didn't know smart food? Never had it. That's crazy. You never had smart food? Well, this is the thing. I'm not a popcorn guy. I'm kind of a popcorn.

You never had smart food. I don't think so. I can fucking tell, dumbass. Yeah. Every single kernel is a perfect pop. Is that true? With the white cherry dust? Mike's not lying to you.

Wow. That's perfect. I mean, like it is like the funny, it's bagged popcorn, but it's so much about the cheese. I think you would like it because it's like more about, you don't like popcorn because it's like the kernels too, but the cheese flavor is what it's all about with smart food. And I feel like they remove the kernels somehow. Like, I don't feel like you get any of those weird little bits in your teeth. Yeah.

It's not like movie theater popcorn or something. You've never had smart food. Everyone is fucking insane. What? Wow. Yeah. It's crazy. Isn't that kind of crazy?

It is kind of wild. It's like a staple snack. The little black bag of popcorn. Yeah. I've seen the bag. I'm just like, I don't need to have this. You never had it. I've never had it.

God, you are a robot in many ways. And this is one of those ways. This is strange to me. This is like, I feel like every little, like I feel like you can't get out of childhood without having it. Childhood? Yeah. Boyhood. I don't remember those from childhood.

Do you remember how in boyhood when they transitioned to him being like going to college, he has a bag of smart food? Right. Oh, I see what year it is. I think these are both good. Any other snack or whack, verdicts, chicken and biscuit, better cheddar's? I agree with you, Mitch. Like the Oreo versus Hydrox of a Cheez-It versus better cheddar. Yeah.

I think a better cheddar's kind of whack. I don't even know if I would give it a whack because they taste fine. If there's a big bowl of these and there's no snack around, I'm going to eat a few of them. I might have a couple more right now actually. But like, but Cheez-It just, right? Come on, Cheez-It. Soft snack? I'll do soft snack.

Soft snack is fair. Soft snack. I'm soft. I'm soft snack on. Limp snack. I think I'm limp snack on both as well. I think I'm a limp snack because I liked that flavor of the chicken and the biscuit, but I didn't love it as much as you. I'm maybe more with you, Mary Jane, of like, it's interesting.

But I think I would rather have a Ritz. I'd rather have a Ritz and maybe like bust out some chicken ramen from the cabinet and then just dust it with some of that chicken ramen flavoring. There you go. I feel like that would give me the... Oh, that's fine. The buttery, salty, chicken-y. You are good at making stone.

Maybe that's why I was like, bag at the Ritos. And you're like making stuff. So there is a big difference. We didn't talk about it in the cookie section, but and those fishing boats that you worked on, Mary Jane, you were the cook and you would make fresh baked chocolate chip cookies for all of the fishermen on your boat. Holy shit. I had to bake 12 dozen cookies a day. It was pretty, it was like a life lesson on how to keep... How many crew were there?

How many fishermen? We were just three on the boat, but then we were a tender. So we were actually going out to the fishing grounds and then making sure that all of the little boats that were out there fishing had everything that they needed to keep fishing. And we would buy their fish from them and then bring that fish into the cannery and then load up with ice and go back out. So we were a go between. And so we gave them like cookies to keep them happy and all that kind of stuff. So I was... Wild life.

Bake at sea. It was cool. Did you ever have like big swells or did you ever have like, was it ever... Did you ever see the perfect storm? I did go overboard one time. Oh my God. It was a bad situation and I felt really stupid, but generally it was like, you know, beautiful, calm, gorgeous. How did you go over?

What happened? It was, I had a premonition about it. We were coming in to tie up and I was in the galley canning salmon and the captain called down from the wheelhouse. I get ready to come out and tie up and it was at night. And as we were pulling in, I tripped over the line that was coiled on the deck and I went in as the boat was pulling in to dock. And so I was between them. One of the more dangerous spots to go in. Totally.

So I was between the pilings and the boat, but luckily there was someone on the dock who saw it happen and he shouted out to the captain who threw it in reverse. And they pulled me out of the water like an ashamed wet seal. You couldn't like, at that point, they still had to pull you out from the boat? I mean, they could have left me in there. Could you not, like you couldn't go to shore or something? No, no, because it was, yeah, just like the pilings were in deep, deep water. Oh, shit. Oh, that's wild.

Oh, that's crazy. Yeah. And also that's a day, I just know that that's a day like you can get like crushed, like that's a bad spot to go down. Totally. It could have popped me like a grape. That's fucking wild. Do you have a life vest on? No.

Oh my God. Just my extra tops and yeah. Did they shout man overboard? Yes. They actually shout that? Yep. Wow. The guy standing on the dock shouted man overboard and they saved my life.

Wow. What do you think would happen if we fell overboard? Four men overboard. Well, first of all, they'd be reacting to the boat going up so high. They'd be shooting into the sky. It would be like a sky ship. One of Bowser's sky ships. Saw the Mario movie.

Sorry. You loved it. I liked it a lot. I really liked the Mario movie. Yeah. Very excited to sit in the back corner with a vape and watch it on like an afternoon. It's a fun way to do it. You know, pride is one of my boys.

I don't want to talk too bad about the movie. He's one of my guys. He listens every week. He does have misophonia. He does have misophonia. No, I've been crunching the microphone. It's a beautiful looking movie. That's the thing.

This is the beautiful looking movie. And this is 90% of my enthusiasm for it is that I feel like it is such a beautiful visual spectacle. And I think it does such a great job of like capturing what's joyous about the video game and then translating that cinematically. And I just like that communal experience of sitting in a theater with a bunch of families and everyone's just having a fucking blast and like reacting on the Mario fan service and it just looks gorgeous.

I just like, I thought it was great. I had a blast. You know my complaint. I never in a million years thought I would say this ever. Too much Kongs. Too many Kongs. There's too much Kong going on in the Mario movie. I want less Kong.

I want more Mario. The big, the bombshell for me was they retconned some Kong canon. And because Cranky Kong is Donkey Kong's grandfather and in the movie they're like Cranky Kong. It says my son Donkey Kong. And later on Donkey Kong is talking about his like disappointing his dad Cranky Kong and he and Mario are about our fucking bonding over that. I don't know why they made that change. Fucking bullshit.

You're turning red. I'm fucking mad right now. It also, it disrupts the timeline of like when did the great, the great eight war take place and also Wrinkly Kong, Cranky Kong's dead wife, who's a ghost, dies without explanation between Donkey Kong land through a Dunkin' Country three and Donkey Kong 64. I guess is now Donkey Kong's mom. So he's dealing with like a mom who's a ghost, which is his own thing. Like it's a little bit more loaded than grandma as a ghost.

You know? Who's the other Kong that was missing that we like, the one who throws the barrels? Well, there was no, we didn't see Lanky Kong. We didn't see Funky Kong. No, the evil, you know, the bad Kong who we're talking about. You know. Oh, the Manky Kong. Manky Kong.

This is the thing. Manky Kongs are canonically in dispute. Like there's some talk about how is that a translation error and like a manual. Do Manky Kongs actually exist? Manky Kongs exist. They're like, those are like the bad Kongs in some of the Dunkin' Country. Manky Kongs exist. And you saw this with families?

You guys explained some Kong lords, all of them. There were no children in my row. I went to a late night screening of Super Mario Brothers. We're childless, but we still will discuss this to till we're 80 years old. Yeah. This will be a topic of discussion for a while. Did you like it more than The Whale? Yes.

I liked it more than The Whale. I liked it more than The Whale. Do I love the characters in The Whale? Yes. Do I wish there was more jacking off in Mario? The Mario movie? Yes. Do I wish there was more meatballs in the Mario movie?

Yes. This is what I think would be shocking if you like, like someone's like, hey, there's this movie, Brendan Fraser plays this person who's, you know, very heavy and this movie called The Whale. I showed him the post and told him the premise. And they're like, and then there's a movie like, you know, the Super Mario video game. Uh, they made it into a movie called the Super Mario Brothers movie. Which ones has meatballs?

Which one has more meatballs? The Whale! It's The Whale's got more meatballs than Mario movies. The Whale's got more fuckin' meatballs than Mario. It's fucking housing meatballs the whole time. Not a meatball to be found in the fuckin' Mario movie. Maybe one of the Mario family members is slurping them up at the family dinner, but… By the way, Mario doesn't like mushrooms.

What the fuck is that shit? I thought that was cute. I'm fuckin' pissed off! That's a cute joke. That's a cute joke. Let's end the fuckin' episode. We have to answer the question. Just like a restaurant, you value your feedback. Let's open up the feedback.

And today we have an email from Meg. Meg writes, Wow! With the, Is Christmas a Cookie Holiday debate? Which came up earlier. It got me thinking about the other holidays and what foods belong with them. Which holiday is a meat holiday? Which holiday is a fish holiday? A veggie holiday?

A bread slash carb holiday? Etc. Come back to Cleveland. I'm kind. I'm back to Cleveland. Alright. Any other holidays? Hollywood Handbook boys are here.

We're gonna get bullied if we gotta fucking wrap this up. Are they recording after us? Uh-oh. Oh boy, here we go. I was going to say… Also, can I say this too? Yeah. When you see like the whale poster and the Super Mario Bros. poster,

like which movie they will have more jacking off to gay porn in it? Yeah. Like the whale. Super Mario movie. That's more of it. Who would have thought? Who would have thought? I mean, a clear meat holiday to me is like the summer holidays.

You know, you're talking about like your July 4th. We're talking about like a Labor Day, you know. These are like, these are big barbecuing holidays. I feel like people are grilling meats. I feel like Valentine's Day is a meat holiday. Valentine's Day. Interesting. I like that.

I do like that. Also, you know what? Like a big prime rib on Valentine's Day? It's so hot. Yeah. Yeah. Big juicy meat. Yeah.

Yeah. Big old slab. Yeah. I mean, Halloween candy. Sure. Candy holiday. Candy holiday. I feel like there's such a collection of like Memorial 4th veteran.

Like they're all hot dog holidays. Lot of hot dog holidays. Lot of hot dog holidays. Absolutely. Which is great. I like a hot dog holiday. Labor Day hot dog holiday, right? Yeah, gotta be.

Some dogs. Any of like the three-day weekend holidays or hot dog holidays. One of our Discord moderators, Fish, favorite holidays, Labor Day, like me, loves hot dogs. You can't imagine how many hot dogs he's having on Labor Day. He's sick, fucks. Favorite holidays, Labor Day. Great holiday. He's weirdos.

Great holiday. You just like the whole thing. Santa. There's no family obligation. You get time off of work and it's a salute to labor. Which is, you know, that's an important part of the whole fucking workforce. We shouldn't work in the modern world. I agree with you.

There you go. We should give us a fucking day. Fucking, you're saluting capitalism, you piece of shit. No, it's an anti-capitalist thing. I don't know. We should be celebrating May Day here. The International Workers' Day. We don't do it.

We have Labor Day. Yeah, that feels like a fish day. May Day. There you go. Ease and fish. Santa. That's all I'm gonna say. Santa.

Fucking anybody. He makes his toys himself. Yeah, with a fucking, like a bunch of non-union elves working for him. They're happy as hell. No, they're fucking, they don't have healthcare. No. You don't think they've ever tried to unionize and Santa squash that? He's never done that.

Shut it down. Unions are good for other poles, but not our poles. It's like Delta. They might not be union, but people are enjoying themselves there. Bread, carb, holiday. I mean, I do feel like, first off, I'll say. So we're breaking it down to each meat holiday, carb holiday. No, I mean, these are just general categories.

We've got other categories. What was the question again? I've now lost it. Which has more jack, no, what is it? Yeah, which has more gay porno jacking off Mario or the whale. Which, no, what other holidays and what foods belong to them? That was the question. I mean, like, I always say, you know, look, Easter, I associate it with ham and with chocolate.

So everyone fucking knows this. Is it a ham holiday? Is it a chocolate holiday? I think it's a chocolate holiday. I don't think it's Easter. I think Easter more is a candy. I don't know about chocolate. It's candy holiday.

But you get the big chocolate bunny. It's a candy holiday. I'll concede it's a candy holiday. I agree with you. I think Easter is the ham holiday. Yeah. Ham holiday, eat ham. You and I can shake hands on this one.

Ham holiday for Easter. I think Christmas is like a tough Thanksgiving obviously gets turkey. But what do you do? What is weird? How do you classify Christmas? The cookie holiday. We've established that comes from your mom. That comes from Mrs. Mitchell herself.

Hold on a second. My mom did say that, but she wasn't saying that it's a cookie holiday more than anything else. Oh, so now the debate is whether or not it is a cookie holiday, but is it a cookie holiday above all? I don't think it is a cookie holiday above all. Wow. I really don't. More so than roast goose or something. I think that Christmas has got, I think about that more than cookies.

No? Nog holiday? Yeah. I think it's more of a Nog holiday than it is a cookie holiday. Wow. Nog and goose. Yes, I'm with you on that. Wow.

There you go. Wow. This, I don't, I'm sorry, I'm speechless. I should just shut up. That's so crazy. I can't tell if Mike is making fun of it or he is in shock, but either way, I'll take it. Yeah.

I really am because I was racking my brain. I was like, maybe it's a candy cane holiday, but I don't think it is. I think it's a more Nog and goose. Wow. Pretty crazy. Nog and goose. St. Patrick's Day, you know that's corned beef. You got your red meat there.

Fucking alcohol. What about I'm racking my brain for a new year's? Like champagne holiday. Oh yeah. You're right. You pop the champagne. I guess it's just a champagne holiday. What else is it going to be?

There's no other food primarily associated with it. Oh, I will add one other one. Bicycle Day is a mushroom holiday. That's right. What the hell is going on? Explain it. You take mushrooms and you ride around on a bike. Is that kind of part of it?

Mary Jane, you're the journalist for Rolling Stone. It's the 419, so the day before this comes out, right? So 419 is the day where the grandfather of LSD discovered the properties of the psychedelic as he rode his bike home from the lab. Wow. Albert Hoffman tripped super, super, super hard on the way home on a bicycle ride that has now gone holiday.

What year was this, you know? Like 1936, sometime around that. Damn tripping out. You're like, I'm going to trip along with some music. It was like, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Like in Glenn Miller, Big Band. It's like sitting there like, whoa. Dude, have you heard this?

The Count Basie Orchestra. Exactly. That is wild. A bike. Well, hold on. Before you, what is 420, then? 420 is. Besides the smoking holiday.

We did say it was cookie holiday earlier, but it might not, maybe it's not primarily a cookie holiday. So the origins of the number 420 are traced all the way back to a group of friends who used to get high together back in the 70s in San Rafael, California, and they were known as the Waldos, and they used to meet at 420 after school and get stoned together. So it wasn't the police code? Because that was a rumor forever, was it?

It was a police code? That's bunk. It's bunk. It came from these friends in NorCal, and then they had like a treasure map that they thought would lead them to a weed grow, a secret weed grow. So they would meet, they would get high, and then they would try and find this secret weed grow. And then gradually that term 420 for like the time to get high

made its weed way into a Grateful Dead culture, and then they spread it across the country. Wow. That is, I had no idea. That's fascinating. Yeah, the Waldos. They're all still around. They're all still friends.

Wow. So maybe brownies? A brownie holiday? Yeah, maybe it's a brownie holiday. I think that's good. Brownie is pretty good. Brownie is pretty good. Donut holiday?

And then the Waldos? The Waldos, that's the name they gave themselves, because they would meet on a wall out back behind Sam Raphael High School. Possibly wearing a red and white striped shirt and hat. Probably. Wow. There you go. 420 is a brownie holiday.

Christmas is a Nog holiday. If you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, eat with us at doboyspodcastedema.com, or leave us a voicemail at 830 Godot. That's 830-46-36-844, and you can get the Doe Boys Double, our weekly bonus episode by joining the Golden or Platinum Play Club at patreon.com slash Doe Boys. You can also check out the Weed and Grubb podcast.

Mary Jane Gibson, Mike Laser. Tell us about the show. Thank you so much for being here. Please take it away, Mary Jane. Follow us at weed and grubb. We drop weekly ups. We have a great time talking about weed and food and everything under the sun. Those are the cornerstones for conversations about literally everything

that we are enjoying at the moment. Wow. It's a good time. Wow. Wow. Yeah, give it a listen. You guys rule. Thank you.

And love having you. Also, I should mention, this episode is coming out on 420. Later today, as of this episode's release, our buddy John Gabriel's here at Head Gum is having a 420 livestream. Yeah. You both are going to guest on it. I am going to guest on it. All being Costa Rica, dude.

But check that out. Emma, do you know what? Is that going to be on the Head Gum live YouTube? Where is that going? Where can people find that? It's going to be at moment.co.highandmighty. Great. Check that out.

Moment.co.highandmighty. Join us later today if you're listening to this episode as it drops. Wow. There you go. Oh, and check out Mary Jane's Instagram. It's the mail for me. I got to plug it on here because it's a great Instagram where she makes sandwiches and talks about how policies need to change.

I don't know if I even want to follow it. I got to follow it. That's fantastic. Thank you. It's a good time. Wow. Wow. Sometimes it's a good time.

The sandwiches are good. I'll listen on mute. That'll do it for this episode of Doe Boys Still Next Time. For The Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell, I'm Nick Weigher. Happy eating. See ya. Happy 420. Emma, will you play the bird chirp at the end?

Think you can ad read with the big boys, meaning the Doe Boys. Then shoot your shot to become Doe Boys Ad Chad. We're putting out a search for the fan who's the cream of the crop at Cold Reading Commercial Copy. The finalists will be revealed on a June episode of Doe Boys Double and the winner will receive a one month paid gig as our promo reader. Wow. Info on how to submit and the test copy is on our social media.

We want you to be our ad chab. Uh, I mean ad chad. Emma, can you fix that in the edit? Sources for the intro are in the episode description.