Doughboys - Munch Madness: Sweetfin vs Chipotle vs Sweetgreen with Lauren Lapkus and Nicole Byer (LIVE)

Episode Date: March 30, 2023

It's the finale of Munch Madness 2023: The Tournament of Chompions: BOWL! Nicole Byer and Lauren Lapkus of Newcomers join forces with the 'boys to determine who will be crowned winner and take home the Dave Thomas Cup. Plus, special appearances from The Commissioner, Mrs. Mitchell, and The Noid.Want more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What's up, everybody? It's your boy, The Spoon Man, and I want to talk to you about today's sponsor, Uber Eats. At Uber Eats, we've helped more than 400,000 restaurants across the U.S. reach new, hungry customers and deliver growth quickly through new orders. Uber's global platform can help you grow, reach new people, get valuable sales data, and unlock ways to expand with flexible delivery options. Put your business on Uber Eats. Get access to the Uber Eats platform, including valuable sales data to grow your business. Dig into your data. Really dig in there, anytime, to monitor your performance and customer order trends. Wow. Wow. Yikes, restaurant owners, enjoy 0% commission for the first 30 days on

all orders, offer subject to change per the terms of the restaurant agreement. Wow, 0% on the first 30 days. Sign up today. That link that you want to click on is down there in the episode description. Right down there. Check it out. There it is. Move your cursor. Go ahead and click. Or if you're on your phone, use your finger. And click that link. Click that link in the episode description. Previously on Fat Chance Kitchen presents Bread Dead Redemption. Let's count down from three to one. We'll say in unison. And we'll say our winner. Our winner. Okay. Three, two, one. Sweet green. It is unanimous. Sweet green. Rejoining the main tournament will be part of the championship live tonight. Five

short weeks ago, eight chains began a bull battle for the agents. Combatants from every school of bulldom of stew consistency or greater brought their B games. The B stands for bull in a quest to be the supreme sad stack we sad sack sucked down for sustenance. One by one, the lesser of the mighty bull beasts were bested. And only the strongest have soldiered on to this climactic conflict, collectively forming a triforce of circle shaped containers when viewed from a bird's eye perspective. So who will prove the baddest bull on the block? Will it be Chipotle, the fast casual Mexican-American chain who's made it socially acceptable to eat seven layer dip with a spoon? Will it be Sweetfin, the pogay pusher who's

emerged in the past decade to offer a chain version of the Hawaiian raw fish dish to hungry gentrifiers? Or will Long Shot Fat Chance Kitchen colon Bread Dead Redemption winner Sweetgreen become the surprise victor via a baked goods end around? Who will emerge as bull baron and glop at scoopy pile of protein and carbs into the most prestigious Tropian chain restaurant podcasting, the Dave Thomas cup slash bull? Which bull will we offer to the whale like Payakon from the Avatar franchise and also to the Brendan Fraser whale, which Darren Aronofsky insists is not meant to refer to the guy, but come on. Which bull captures our soul? Tonight, a champion will be crowned. This week on Doe Boys, live from

Head Gum Studios, it's the finale of Munch Madness 2023, the tournament of champions, bowl, Chipotle, versus Sweetfin, versus Sweetgreen. Earlier today, footage of Commissioner Susser arriving at Head Gum Studios. The passenger side of the Tesla apparently had that in self driving mode. He has the Dave Thomas cup. Yes, this is the mission of the day. Anya looking very confused, and here he is bringing up the Dave Thomas cup and being greeted by CEO of Head Gum, Amir Blumenfeld. There's Head Gum hunk Brad in the background. He's updating his model mayhem profile. He's heading towards the studio now and bringing the Dave. No, he's actually heading towards the break

room. Yeah, that's the break room. He's in the break room and he is going towards snacks. He's raiding the snack cabinet. He's at the snack pile here and he is rummaging. Generally we serve for employees at Head Gum and he's taking his soda out of the fridge. He found a Coke heavy. I mean, there's just, there's no chance he returned any of that. He kept all of that. No, he's at NBA Jam. He's going to play. Oh, the NBA Jam machine. Yes. Hold on. Is he looking for quarters? He's looking for quarters in the coin slot. That's machine long since decommissioned and on free play. Problematic joke setting. Well, it's, it's not, it's not coming on anyone besides Susser, who is a thrifty man as an individual. That's

fair. Susser is now bringing the Dave Thomas cup into the studio and placing it on the table where we record Doughboys. That's right. Here it will remain for the duration of this episode until a new winner is crowned. Wow. What's going to happen today? What is going to happen today? Welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants. Wow. And this is the live finale of Munch Madness 2023, the tournament of champions. We're like, we're like the soccer announcers. Oh, we are like the soccer announcers. Me, Nick Weiger, along with my cohost, Richard Bolzer as detective Munch Madness, the spoon man, Mike Mitchell. Weig's. What an exciting night. What a night. What a night this is.

We're here. Your alarm, your phone alarm just went off during the show. It's not my phone alarm. Okay. A phone alarm just went off during the show. Yeah. It's an alarm. It says check out for two hours. That's what our listeners said. Hey, shut the fuck up, Weiger. I'm trying to be like, I can't do it. We look like them. We kind of look like them. For our audio listeners, we are in cosplay, big Lebowski cosplay. And I am dressed like the dude or perhaps I should say the food. And you are dressed as John Goodman's character. Perhaps I should say John Foodman's character. John Foodman. That's good. Yeah, that's good. Except for that's like really horny versions of it. You guys can't see it, but our titties are kind

of out. Yeah. Our titties are out. Nipples are wrecked. Super horny. Weig's. We're like the whale looking at gay porno, just like fully aroused. Mitch, for our audio listeners, I also want to say this, if you're listening this in the Doughboys main feed, if you want to watch the video, the replay is available for purchase for one week at moment.co slash Doughboys. So you can watch this whole thing, moment.co slash Doughboys. And then after 60 days with a 60 day exclusivity period, then after that it will be on our YouTube channel. So sometime in June, you can look for that. I disagree. I don't think it should be. It might never be on our YouTube channel, but as of now, that's at least our arrangement.

Fucking go to Moment House, get it. Yeah, go to moment.co slash Doughboys. Pick it up for one week right now. But Mitch, we have so much show to get to. We're starting late. We got some tech issues, which our team ably handled, not their fault. They were a dream figuring it all out on the fly. And we have a lot of... A problem. Tech is continually a problem. Also the name of the drug in the Robocop universe, is that correct? A problem there. Tech war. Tech was fought over, war was fought over tech. Always an issue with tech. But Weig's, I think it's time for me to get to a little drop. Is that right? Wow. Here we go, Weig's. And you know what? It's Munch Madness, the tournament of Chompion's

Bowl. That's right, Mitch. And I'm going to do a double drop. A double drop? A double drop. D-d-d-d-double drop. D-d-d-d-double drop. Here we go, Weig's. M... Yesterday, I had a bowl for dinner, but it'll still be ours till we crowd a winner. Kick it, Ecava, Harissa, chicken. You have a bowl and your brain stops ticking. Watching dope wins with the lights on. Studio head dump. I hope Ceci's rules are in this one. Like Paul Rust, I'm getting silly. Like Nick, I'm silly. Chipotle guaranteed to satisfy. Like Presti, make green juice. Kato, make juice. But if I did, they'd be the sweeter kind. Gonna get a set of betta bowls. Gonna put it in my hole in my cells there.

Coming from sweet green. Gotta get into a job of juice, cause that soup is not soup. You should know it makes me feel a bad thing. How can I help it if I think you're funny when you're mad? Trying hard not to eat like a shithead. I'm the kind of guy who eats too many pokey boys. Can't understand what I mean when you stew well. I have a tendency to make a mess on my sleeve. I have a history of swimming in a shirt. It's bad. Wow. I'm realizing the camera there, it's just a wide of the two of us just sitting, listening to the drop. Yep. But I mean, what else are we supposed to do? We're moving back and forth. Look, I'm bopping a little bit. DK was like, we gotta play two drops. Yeah.

One of them was the length of the original song. I think he specifically said, I will cry if you don't play two drops. Yeah. That was, that was the email. I was like, drop king, don't cry. I was like, no, I will break into, I will burst into tears if you don't play two drops tonight. I gotta say this too. Yeah. There's a laptop outside of our window. That's right. Which is playing the show, but with a time delay. It's a slight delay, which is what you're seeing. It's kind of like scream, except it's just like, I can see like, oh, like that unfunny joke just happened. Like I'm seeing us bomb. Yeah. Like a few seconds later. It's just as silent as it would be

if we had an audience of onlookers. It's just sad to see, to relive it. Yes. Just like, oh, that's one window and relive it. That's when I stumbled over a sentence a few seconds ago. Yeah. There it is though. That's it. Anyways. Hello, Doughboys. Here's an awful parody song to commemorate the end of bowl. Sorry that it's long. Should have read that, but I try to make it as fast as possible. Best. Good job. Yeah. You tried to make it as fast as possible. Oh my God. That was so fucking fast. Dude, holy shit. I got it down to a tight 230. Cool. Great job. Best. Impostered Dano from the Discord and Minister of Dave Clock Propaganda. Okay.

Anyways. Thanks, Dano. He also puts the lyrics not reading those. Wags, let's hit them with the other drop. Why not? Yeah, let's do it. Wagers never cross an ocean. Yeah. However, I've been to Masiano's, Pugglebell, Long John Silver's, Wienerschnitzel, Little Caesars, Harl's Jr., Domino's, Yard House, Native Food, Sizzler, Wingstop, Benji Grille, and in Jerry's Scoop Shop, Fresh Brothers, Walbert, Parks Rock Cafe, Smash Burger, Del Taco, Bat Sal, Steak and Shake, Burger Gang, Hillstone, Pizza Hut, Five Guys, Pinkberry, Jollibee, California Pizza Kitchen, Crispy Cream, Sweet Cream, Cold Stone Creamery, Sharkies, The Coffee

Bean, and Tealey, Taco Bell, Doghouse, TGI Fridays, Farmer Boys, Harby's, Hooters, Bob's Big Boy, Checkers, and Rowley's, Quiznos, Lemonade, Fat Burger, Jersey Mike's, Yogurtland, Johnny Rockets, Dunkin' Donuts, KFC, Mr. Pizza, Flame Jumper, Shake Shack, Papa John's, Anyhot, Sugarfish, Dairy Queen, Dave's Hot Chicken. Okay, we get it. That's good. That was really good. That was our drop winner from the drop-off. That's right. This is a night of champions, Mitch, and we have one of our true champions in the drop game. Chris Finke. Finke, the think man. Rest in Peace, Johnny Cash was his, the entire, what's it called? Not the meat.

Was that a Johnny Cash song? Yeah. I always thought that was someone else who did that. I've been everywhere, man. Oh, maybe he did a cover of it. Me? I don't know. He did a cover of it. I thought it was like Merle Haggard or something. The header, oh, what's the meat of the, there's the subject. Yeah. Well, mom was an English teacher. She's in the other room, probably furious at it. Do you mean the object? What's the big chunk of the email when you write your email? The subject, the subject line in the body of the email. The body. Yeah, like the body of Christ.

Oh, God, I don't kind of forget the body. If this is the body of Christ, I'm in trouble. Why has we been doing this? Yeah, these days, kids go to church, they hear the body of Christ, they think, what, is this an email? Jesus wrote. Man, I'm going to be sad to see that replay in the fucking video. And you were bailing me out on top of it all. My mom, my mom is here, we've been doing some. She sure is, Mitch. We've been doing some shopping together. We went to Home Depot. Great trip with the mom. Let me tell you, I had to use the bathroom in Home Depot.

Wait, number two? Well, come on, we don't have to get into that. It was pretty clear it was number two. We don't know what it was. Okay. I'm just going to say this, that's the major leagues of taking a shit is Home Depot. Well, you're going to be like, that's like fucking, that's the big, it's the big leagues. Among retail. Yeah, it's, it's, it has kind of an industrial feel. It's not the most sanitary environment. I've definitely gone number one in some Home Depot restrooms, maybe gone number two in a Home Depot. I can't remember.

I was, I was, I was intimidated. It was like a thing. I was going up to the big leagues. I couldn't cut it. I went in there and I got scared. Oh, you got stage fright. I was like, here, hold this rook. He gave me a fucking roll of toilet paper. Took a huge shit. Yeah. Stand here. You'll fucking hold this as I use it. And I was like, Don Darenson, he's one of the best shitters in the league. This is the show. I saw, I always think that of the big leagues of shitting as a public beach.

That's a rough path. Oh yeah. That's a rough, a lot of times there's no seats. That's just like a metal sort of industrial thing. There's, there's maybe like the wall that doesn't go all the way up. You know, it's just like a semi-divider. That's professional. That's professional stuff right there. You really don't care when you go in there and you do your work. But if you go in like a hotel lobby, oh man, you're sitting pretty. Oh, that's, come on. That's easy street.

That's the dream. The hotel lobby, Nordstroms. I want to say high-end restaurant, but some high-end restaurants have like a, weirdly have like a one-seater restroom. The lobby bathroom, that's everybody gets a trophy. That's that, that, that's that sort of shit. But yeah, no, I was, I was intimidated, but we got, we, we've done some great stuff. She just extended her trip. Yes. Permanently. She's gonna, she's just gonna stay here for good. That's a good move.

But Nick, she's excited to be here. I'm excited to be here. Yes. And you know what else is excited to be here? And we're excited to have him. The commissioner of the Doughboys Tournament of Champions, please welcome to make a statement. Evan Susser. Wow. Susser is walking in to a royalty-free approximation. Vincent McMahon's theme. I kind of love his new, I think it's pretty good. I love his new walking, his royalty-free walking music. We should get, I think Doughboys should go in a more royalty-free

direction and just make, make public domain jokes. I think it's good. Yeah, I think it's good. Doesn't cost as much. It's true. Um, we saw you in the video. I'm going to make a brief statement. Wow. And then open the floor to questions. Susser wearing a full suit is always looking sharp. Also, I cannot hear anything in my headphones. Your button wants to thank you for fucking undoing it right there.

That's all the technical people know. Okay. I think I heard the button say, Phew, what do you on did it? It's 11. Hello. And welcome to the live finale of the Tournament of Champions 2023 Munch Madness Bowl.

Like they say in soccer, as commissioner of the tournament, it is my honor to declare that this has been the best tournament in the history of the podcast. Wow. Unbelievable. By what has already been. I don't know. I agree with the commissioner. I think this is great. Okay. But to make things go even smoother for tonight. Wow.

And at the direction of the Doughboy Steering Committee, I have a quick rule adjustment to make. And that is the categories are scatter gories. Wow. Wow. That's right. We're scattering the categories to the wind. The finalists will be assessed by overall quality and not broken down to needlessly intricate and time consuming categories. They have been assessed by in previous rounds.

This doesn't work. Can we. Susser. Yeah. I'm just I'm floored by this. We're I'm shocked by this. I just want to clarify. You mean we're not going to review greens, fruit, grains, granola, protein, yogurt, nut, butter, dips, dressing, Megan trainer, aka the baseball, silverware, drinks, bread, treat. Did I get a treat treat? Is this a treat? Treat Williams, Uncar, Plutt, Navi, speed, the whale,

piacon, motorboating, nap or napkin, Damon Lindelhoff's lost and a Nicole category and Lapkus category that I guess could add. No. Wow. Those are scatter gories now. Shit. Which of course means no longer in use and scattered. Wow. Can we please just keep the whale category if the whale would eat it? Yeah. Yes. OK, great. There is a whale category.

Please remember questions at the end. OK. In addition, after thoroughly examining the question of is Christmas a cookie holiday, I have decided we still do not have enough points to view. Wow. I'm going to make a final judgment. Wow. So I am bringing in one more person.

Oh my God. To make a judgment which will officially be settled and then retired from the podcast. Wow. Oh my God. And that person is. I think I know who it is. It's Bart Coleman from moment.co. No, it's not Bart Coleman. It's not Bart.

He's in the green room. Oh wow, he's here. It's Mitch's mom. Oh my goodness. Oh my God. Mrs. Mitchell is being escorted into the studio by Amelia walking in here, looking dashing in her sweater. Come on in. Come on out of a seat.

Get sit here for a second. Sweater says cheers. Perhaps appropriate for the holiday we're about to discuss. And also appropriate for the city of Boston. Oh, very much so. Mom, we have one. You get to close the door on this topic. Yes.

Is cookie. Wait, damn it. You're going to have to relive that in like 15 seconds. You saying is cookie and then beating yourself up for it. Is cookie is the question. Mom, is Christmas a cookie holiday? No doubt about it. No doubt about it.

It's the absolute ultimate cookie holiday. The ultimate cookie holiday could not be more emphatic, Mitch. There it is. The question is settled and will not be asked on the Doe Boys podcast ever again. Wow. Wow. We did. We did have a voicemail from John Hodgman on this topic, too, but.

As long as I don't have to make them. All right, a caveat. Okay, as long as you don't have to make them. As long as you don't have to make them, it is a cookie holiday. It's a Christmas. Can we play the hollywood voicemail and we'll see if we'll see if Mrs. Mitchell agrees. Hey, double read. Hey, there, master.

It's John Hodgman. Nick actually asked me to weigh on this like weeks ago, but I forgot about it because it's stupid. But yes, Christmas is absolutely a cookie holiday. Let's not discuss it further, but I will suggest since we're already planning for the holiday, so here's a drinker's tank for you, suggested by Judge John Hodgman. Listener Pam a couple of years ago, eggnog combined with orange soda. I recommend Fanta.

I don't get money from them. Try it. Try it. That's all I'm going to say, except please check out Hulu for your Dicktown and up here needs two things that I was involved in that I'm very proud of. Okay, that is all. Goodbye. Thanks, Hodgman.

Hodgman agrees with you, although he does suggest Mrs. Mitchell. I want to get your opinion on this. A holiday beverage, eggnog plus orange soda. No. No. Okay, there you go. Flatly refuted. Plugging Pam, whoever Pam was.

Ma, thank you very much. Thank you, Mrs. Mitchell. Do you have anything you'd like to plug? If you want Christmas cookies, go to Trader Joe's and get the Joe Joe's with double chocolate on top and tell them you made them. The Joe Joe's, the holiday cookies from Trader Joe's, the Joe Joe's. Wait, did you hear the end of that? She said, and tell them you made them.

Hey, wait a minute, did you tell me that? Your beloved childhood cookies, you've been eating since you were a boy. From Joe Joe? Love you, Ma. Thank you, Ma. Thank you, Mrs. Mitchell. Great to see you. Mommy, kiss my forehead before you go, please.

Thank you. Now the show is sure to go well. That was lovely. And now for the end, there is more that will be said. And that is, I am taking this opportunity to do something unprecedented. Announce next year's tournament of Chompion's theme. Unbelievable. Following the great legacy of the Munch Madness 2020 tournament in which the

Doughboys ate every item at the McDonald's menu to determine item supremacy. Mac attack. Mac attack. The 2024 tournament, we'll see the Doughboys do the same thing at Taco Bell. Oh my God. The entire Taco Bell menu? The entire Taco Bell menu. That doesn't suck.

I mean, that's great. I mean, it's great. It's going to suck. It's going to suck, but it's going to be awesome. But that's for next year. Wow. For now, we had one good healthy, and this wasn't even really that healthy. Well, we'll get to it.

Okay. 2024. That's for next year. I think I might be checking out before then anyways. We'll see what happens. I look forward to the rest of the thrilling finale. Wow. Thank you, Doughboys.

Thank you, Susser. Thank you, Commissioner. We love you. Thank you, Commissioner. Love you. Commissioner Evan Susser, everybody. Thank you. Everyone give an 07 salute to Susser in the chat.

Hey, hey. One kiss on the forehead. Very sweet. Yay, the show is sure to go well now. Wow. Speaking of the show going well, and this is of a piece with perhaps our tech issues are in our delayed start. I mean, could the world hear what we just heard, I guess is the question.

So I don't know if the world could hear what we just heard, but I can clue the world into what's happening. Mitch, this is true. We booked somebody to sing the national anthem. Yeah. That individual was the Noid. That's correct. The Domino's mascot.

Well, yesterday, the Noid texted us and said that he had COVID. The Noid has COVID. The Noid has COVID. The Noid has COVID. The Noid has COVID. And why? We were like, this is such a shame. You know, we were looking forward to this so much, and now.

Yeah. What are we going to do? What are we going to do? People don't want to hear the national anthem, because this is such an important sporting event, and we have to salute America. We have to salute America. We love America. We love America.

We have to weirdly militaristic. Support America in every way that we can. Exactly. So I didn't want to make this person do anything they had. They have COVID. The Noid has COVID. And the Noid said, the show must go on. The show must go on.

I'm going to do this. The bowl must go on. The bowl must bowl on. And the Noid insisted on singing. This is true. The Noid said, I want to do it over Zoom, and I want to sing. So please welcome, live, via Zoom. Yelling at his children, or his child, that the show is about to begin.

It's the Noid. It's the Noid. Wow. Wow. Welcome, Noid. I'm going to stand for the anthem. Oh, say, can you see, by the dawn's early light, What so proudly we hailed, at the twilight's last gleaming,

Whose bold stripes and bold stars, through the perilous fight, O'er the ramparts we watched, were so gallantly streaming, And the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air, Gave proof through the night, that our food was still there. Oh, say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave, O'er the land of the free, and the home of the brave? Let's play bowl. Wow.

Thank you, the Noid. Feel better, buddy. My stomach hurts. Oh, my God. Oh, man, it sounded so much like shit. I love the Noid. We love the Noid. We love the Noid.

Thank you, the Noid. The Noid, we love you. A national treasure. The Noid. Also, does the Noid have a clockwork orange poster? The Noid is going to pull a real Noid. Oh, boy. If you'll ever want to ball with dough, boys.

Noid, we love you. Thank you. We love you, Noid. Thanks, buddy. The Noid has COVID, but still, I was trying to squat and put myself into the camera, but it just looked like I was taking that shit and pledging allegiance. Well, I don't think any of the show will be funnier than that, but. No, that's a real, we should just end the stream now.

We have two amazing, funny guests. That's true. Who technically by the out time, we told them they have about 30 minutes left, so. It'll work out. It's going to work. They're going to stay extra. They love us. We're very, very excited to have these guests.

We have two of the funniest. Two of the funniest people on earth. They host the great podcast, Newcomers. Please welcome to the show. Nicole Byer and Lauren Lapkus. Wow. Wow. Oh my goodness.

Hi, hi, hi. Oh, hello. Thank you for your spot of choice. Thank you both for being here. Very excited for having both. It's tight. It's a little warm. Little tight, little toasty.

No, you're good. No, we can go headphones now. Unless you want to bring the Noid out again and have him sing the national anthem. It wasn't a pillow. Do you want a pillow? I got an extra one. No, no, it was good. It just went straight down.

How are you guys? I was so sure that it was Weigar's ass you were talking about. That's, yeah. This is a pillow? Oh, yeah. Oh, they're shinside. Honestly. The shit is that?

Oh, it's a little mushy. You said that while you're rubbing someone's ass. The shit inside. We were thrown to have you both. Thank you so much. If they if they're cool with that, they pass their marriage material. Yeah. I want to say hi to the piss pigs.

I saw them in the comments. Piss pigs are freedom fans. So make yourself known. Thank you both for being here. Yes. Thank you both for being here. Thank you for sitting in the green room with my mom. She's so great.

We were talking about TJ Maxx. A lovely person. Yeah, we all love TJ Maxx. Wait, TJ. I always default to Ross. You're saying TJ Maxx where should we go? Yeah. OK, TJ Maxx, Marshalls.

That's delightful. Ross is like, well, the problem with Ross is that they don't organize it as frequently. So it's a bit more disorganized. And the children, they're very loose. Sure. And they're running and you part a rack and there's a child there and you're like, who do you belong to?

No, that's all. These are all good points. Wait, what do you what's your strategy at TJ Maxx? Oh, man, I usually go in looking for some sort of holiday decor and then I leave with a candle or something. And you leave with a suitcase? Yeah, always a suitcase. You get a suitcase every time you're in there?

Every time you have to. I have so many suitcases. Do you really? I do. I got the old trusty. I got one. You got one? I got one suitcase that Wally and Irma always climb on top of.

It's very cute. But I only got that. Did Jack wear a carry-on? I have one carry-on. So I have two, I guess, total. Here's my thing. This is going to sound like an 80s bit. Marshall, Ross, they all sound like

80s villains. Yikes. TJ? TJ Maxx. TJ Maxx. They all sound like 80s villains. Anyway, I'll work it out at the open mic. No, that's good.

I think it's good. I think you should. It's got some legs. Yeah. I don't think there's anything to work out. I think it's done. Yeah, no, my mom and I are going to open mics. She's going to sit in the audience watching.

Yeah, that's really good. I have a question for you that's not bowl related. Although we have a lot of bull talk, which is that your podcast newcomers, you've covered a lot of franchises. Right now, everyone's the whale crazy, both the Brendan Fraser whale, but also Pyacon from Avatar, The Way of Water.

Have you given any thought to the land of Pandora, to the world of Avatar? Have you seen Avatar? Oh, have I? Oh, okay. I genuinely love Avatar. Wow. I love this.

This is huge. I'm the only person in the world. Okay, the second movie, Way of the Water, I waited. And I was like on Twitter being like, when are we going to get James Cameron? And then when I got it, I was like, I love this. There's like a whole 45 minutes where there is no movie and they're just like swimming and fishing,

and I loved it. The fucking best. Asbestos right now. I've never seen it. I mean, I would watch it, but you've already seen it. But I did, I was going to say right outside the door, that I met Chris Colfer at a party, and he's a newcomer's fan,

and he said we should do Batman. Oh, that's a great one. I know, but it actually works, right? It does work, and it seems awful. I know. So it might be the next one. I think Batman fan base is great. Everyone who loves the Joker, they're cool as hell.

Yeah, I think it would go really well. I think it would go really well. The posters would be great, yeah. Yeah. The thing that's fun about Batman though is it spans a bunch of, like there's Batman's that take itself themselves too seriously, like the Batman,

but there's also like the Batman's that kind of can't be fun. Wait, which is the Batman? That's the recent one with Robert Pattinson. Okay, I saw that one. You saw that one, yeah. It was like three hours, and it could have been longer. So you love it.

So that one I did love, but I've tried watching the one where there's an icy man. Yes, Mr. Freeze. This is the Joel Schumacher. I tried to watch that, and I didn't. Oh, that's with that guy. Yeah, it's a little campy. I think that's a Clooney one.

That guy. The guy who was Robin. Chris O'Donnell. Thank you. Chris O'Donnell. It's from Will Met Illinois, the suburb, Dr. Mike. Really? Yeah.

Oh, wow. He's on a NCIS New Orleans, I think. He's been on that for like 11 seasons. You're so long. I was at a Shake Shack, and they had it on the TV. And then we just stayed there and watched the rest of NCIS New Orleans or whatever the fuck it was. I had an experience like this, too, and it was the craziest.

This just happened. I don't know if I talked about it on the podcast, but I was watching something like the NBA or something, and then... You were watching the NBA. I was watching the NBA. Yeah. The National... On TNT, I was watching the National Fastball Association.

I had a Y-Grenade. I was watching the NBA. There you go. I was watching the league. And it ended, and it was a NCIS New Orleans episode. And the plotline was for real. Was that a king cake got poisoned? And so many people were losing it, and I was like,

oh, we're poisoned from the king cake. I'm all about down here on the bottom. You're real about the food. That feels like it was from the game. The pilot. It was insane. That's so funny. The king cake, and it was like a C.C.H. Pounder,

an Ithaca alumni, Ithaca college alumni. She had been poisoned, I believe. It was a thing where they were working against a ticking clock. It was, like, big time poisoned. That's just their formula, they're like, okay, what local delicacy is getting poisoned this season? We start with gumbo.

Someone poisoned the jambolaya. Benye's. Yeah. Benye's. The riot is on the board, and the riot is here. Here's another thing I have to point out. The Noyde's video, he's still connected. Oh, my God.

Yeah, I can tell the Noyde, he can log off. No, he can stay. I do wonder if the Noyde has disrobed from the Noyde outfit. Yeah, what's he doing back there? Yeah, what's he doing? If his child is now more used to him as the Noyde, than not as the Noyde, there's a lot of questions. And wants him to be the Noyde forever?

Wants him to be the Noyde forever. That's daddy. Should I text the Noyde and tell him he can log off? No. Okay. I'm stuck on Benye's. Have you guys done Benye's on the show? I mean, I don't know if we've reviewed or placed it as Benye's.

Popeyes, we talked about Benye's from Popeye's. Look at that, thought of it. Well, you guys are in sync. That's true. You're twin flames. You're twin flames. Yeah, twin flames. You didn't ask for a kiss from mother on the way out, and I'm pissed.

That would be presumptuous. I'd gladly take a kiss from mommy. All right, fucking relax. Mother being susser? Yes, susser, yeah. But do you have a hot take on Benye's? Are you a Benye fan? Oh, I love them.

You love them. They're so delicious and delightful. They're very nice. There's this place. I think it's on Bourbon Street. Oh, no, wait. I was going to say there's one at the mall. Oh, yeah, here.

What? Benye box. Wow, that's Americana. Yeah, that's good. Oh, wait. And I love me the Americana. Yeah, me too. Oh, I love an outdoor mall.

Americana's losing Din Tai Fung going next door to whatever the fuck is going. Galleria. Yeah, no, I'm sorry. That's really tough. I don't know what the fuck my mom is doing here. She is now maybe leaving. I think she's firing people. Oh, no, she's fine.

Yeah, it doesn't look like she's firing people. She's like, I'm so sorry. I have to let you go. If you don't marry my son, you're fine. Can't do that, mom. Yeah, no. Your mother is so sweet. What a sweetie.

You know, and she's really good hair. Yes. She has a great hair. Yeah. She's all right. What the hell are they? They are looking at. They're discussing our live stream like it's bad.

We're seeing them. So we have studio windows. Everyone's starting. There's like five people. They've all left the room or we're playing. Very strange. They're like, we don't want to listen or watch this anymore. It's boring now.

Okay, fair enough. It is a big question for you. I got a big question for you. Okay. Okay. When you're at home, enjoying yourself and your time off. What do you mean by enjoying myself? Oh, boy.

Well. When you're at home, you get home from, you get home from, I was trying to think, I was going to say a specific show and I don't know what ones are filming and then I was afraid to say it wrong. Just say NCIS, new one. Yeah. All right, so you're going to get home from NCIS.

I guess I'll roll on NCIS. Yeah. Yeah. Can I be recurring? You're recurring on NCIS. I want like one line. Okay. You're, you're a guest, a special guest.

I'm like one line every five episodes. Okay. That's all right. Yeah. So can I be onset writer, but I want them to like not go to me for alts. Yeah. I'm just kind of there.

Okay. Yeah. You're that guy. And trust me, everyone on the cast is not afraid of you. So you guys, you're there like every few episodes with five lines. You have just a line. You die in the episode. Maybe you got poisoned by Gator stew.

Right away. Yeah. Gator stew. First four minutes or your first two minutes and then that's part of the plot. Yeah. Right. You come home from set. Oh my God.

What a day. I'm tired. How often are you reaching for a bowl? Oh. Why? That was a great question. It was a good question. I thought it was beautiful.

Yeah. I thought it was pretty good. I know where it was landing. How often are you, how often are you using a bowl? Oh, using a bowl? Did you use a bowl often? I make ramen at home. I make soup.

Okay. Wow. Make, roll it back. I heat up. Got it. Okay. Out of cardboard containers. That is different.

Yeah. Yeah. Very different. Very different. But I put things in bowls. I sometimes will put portions in bowls. Uncar, what? Uncar, plug style.

Yeah. Yeah. I'll put portions in bowls. Just a portion thing. So I don't eat a whole bag of chips. I'll have just a portion. That's what I do with popcorn. Yeah.

That's great. But I eat some soup and some ramen. Yeah. Yeah. That's all right. That's good. I'm not making salads usually at home. I do make salads at home and I'll put them in a pasta bowl,

which is just a shorter bowl. Yeah. I eat eggs out of a bowl. I also eat eggs with chopsticks. It's weird. Mike loves chopsticks. Really? He always uses chopsticks.

I love chopsticks too. It makes your food more fun. It is fun. Yeah. Anything you can do to fun up a meal. I'll do that if I'm eating something with Cheetos. Yeah.

I'm going to get on my fingers. That's fun. That's a lot of fun. I remember discovering that. I remember my glasses are steaming up. I think I have to take off my glasses. I think my glasses are. That's the same thing earlier.

You did the same thing happened to you? But they're part of the look. It's disappointing. Yeah. But I can only want to look at you. All right. Here's the deal. They look cool.

You do look cool. I said to you when I came up there, I was like, I was like, I might keep this as my look. I look sweaty. I can't tell if it's because of the show, but I look kind of without a hat. No, I think it really works though. Yeah, it works.

I mean, honestly, you're kind of, it's working. Look, I actually feel like the Lebowski outfits are working. This is a bad fabric for a fat. Nothing good. Is that polyester? It's not. It's unnatural fibers. And that's not good for us.

Polyester makes you sweat. Yeah, it's not good. Yeah. No. We ordered it on Amazon. It came in two days in my size, which is, she was insane. Yeah.

Those tiny hands were like, it's so big. Oh, no. Oh, no. He needs it in two days. He needs it. No. Everybody make the costume. Everyone together.

There's a couple of kids on the hot side, and they're like, oh, okay. He needs the glasses. Don't forget the glasses. Oh, no. We have to make the glasses. That's the key part. Oh, no.

I'm tired. Then you know what? They go home at the end of the day. Maybe they enjoy a little bowl. They have a bar. I have a house that keep bowl. No, this was straight up American made shirt. Why?

Everything I buy. You made in the USA. Buy children. Buy children. Yes. Buy children. Buy children. Wait, because I know Amelia loves to,

our associate producer, Amelia loves to thrift. She thrifted a lot of this, right? She did, yes. When someone went out and did this for you, that is so kind. Isn't that amazing? I know. It's such my mom fired her a few minutes ago.

Wow. Oh, no. Gross, Chuff. My mom on the way here, I was like, we're recording at the podcast, you know? She's like, do they have wine? I'm like, no, I don't know. I don't think so.

I love your mother. Why don't you bring her some wine? There might be some wine, though. Is there wine? I think there's some wine. Because you have a nice drink. There's wine. There's wine.

There's wine. You make her come to work with you, and you don't give her wine? We're going to put an end to the wine ahead of time. You make her do your job. It's not professional. I don't think it's professional. I don't think it's professional.

Professional? She's not working. So what does Robert Pattinson have that I don't got? I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. British. I don't know. He's British.

Is he British? I don't know. He's British. Okay. Oh. It's one of the... I feel like he's like a secret Brit. Like he always plays American roles.

Oh, yeah. He is secretly British. I hate those secret Brits. House is kind of like that. Yeah. Who? House is a secret Brit. House is a secret Brit.

Hugh Laurie. Yeah. Do you not know that? Hugh Laurie? No. I did not know he was British. How wild. You know, who else is a secret Brit, isn't it?

Why? You? It's true, isn't it? Why is it a secret Brit? It's true, isn't it? It's true, isn't it? Boy, Prince Andrew's innocent, isn't it? Oh, no.

Whoa. That's the statement of every British person. That's true. That's how you know it's true. I got news for you. You're not the only one there, Wiggy. Wow. I'm more of like the fat, piggy Englishman.

Don't call yourself a-oh. I'm a secret English lady. Pretty wild because I'm a princess. Oh, I can't believe it. We don't use bowls over there. But, Amy, we only use plates. Yeah. Oh, fillers.

We call them. Fillers. Yes. We use fillers. Or plates of filler over there. Cross the pond. We call them fillers. Anyways, we lost probably a lot of our English-watching audience.

And that means everyone. Most of our audience is English. I love that. We got them back with fillers. You mean British? British, sorry. British. British.

I don't know why I'm fl- I feel like I'm flopping a little bit. What, on the show? What do you mean flopping? I feel like I'm like ner- Like, I got ner- You're doing great. Look, this is the thing.

I think it's because my mom is watching. Your mom is here. That's a big part of it. That is a huge problem. You get that expectation. Not against your mom, but when my parents are watching, it's not as good. Yeah. Mom, whatever this catches up to you,

you might just stand outside for like, fucking an hour or something. Whatever that's about to say there. I mean, if you got her wine, then maybe she would be happy sitting elsewhere. To just go anywhere else. You know? Wandering the streets.

Here's a question I have on topic. Byer, you, I last I recall, you are an avowed soup skeptic. You're not someone who likes soup. Have you come around to soups? No. No. Soup is bad. Chicken noodle soup is disgusting.

Chicken noodle soup is disgusting. That is absolute trash. You know what? Actually, the chicken is always fucking gross. Yes. But I like everything else, and I always want to find chicken noodle soup without the chicken, but the idea of that.

Interesting. A lot of Jewish delis, you can just get a chicken broth, you know, or you get the matzimal soup, which is the chicken broth. I think I would like that. I'm not here for it. I don't like tomato soup. That's gross.

Gospachos, ketchup. It's all nasty to me. Honestly, I think it's great. Ramen is that soup? Ramen is a soup. I like the only soup I like because there's big chunkums in it. Yeah. It's like, it's like a separate, it's like outside the category.

We're getting to Mitch's taxonomy of soups. Mix it, but do you remember your four categories of soup? Yes. Okay. Do you want to recite them for everyone? I don't agree with these. It was ramen, fa. I remember, I remember.

It kind of goes ramen, fa, chowder. Chowder. And the fourth category was soup. Soup. I think that that makes sense if you think about it. I actually kind of think you're right, because chowder isn't soup per se, but it is soup. Yeah, it's under soup.

It's under the umbrella. Like a clam chowder. I would never eat that. No, that's why I would never eat that. Light and too creamy looking. I'm glad my mom's not watching the live stream and weirdly standing in the hallway entrance, along with everyone else.

It seems that there's maybe a streaming issue. What the fuck is going on out there? That's her standing right in front of the monitor, and it looks like he's manning it like a command console. Yeah, it does. Like he's vetoing certain jokes. What is he doing? That's good.

We should probably need a few cups for me and you. You could probably cut everything before they came out. This show is brought to you by BetterHelp. You know, Mitch, I learned something new about myself recently. I learned I can stick to a bedtime routine. I can go to bed at the same time and wake up at the same time every day and stick to that, because getting to know yourself can be a lifelong process,

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to get 50% off your first box. Do it. Anyways, do you guys have any experience with the places in the finale today? We got three big ones. Chipotle sweet fin and sweet green, or what we're discussing in Munchman is 2023. The term of Chompion's Bowl, this is the finale.

Chipotle, to talk about the road to how we got here, defeated Yoshinoya in the Rumblies region and pressed in the semi-soft finals. Sweet fin defeated Pokebar in the Poke region and Kava in the semi-soft finals. And sweet green snuck in the back door in our Losers' Bracket Fat Chance Kitchen, bread dead redemption, so that's where we stand.

Chipotle sweet fin, sweet green, any box. You just said all that like it would give more information. I heard that. I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. I was honestly going, he's reading so fast. Yeah, I was like, oh wow. You go micromachine pays. I go, he didn't even mess up.

Our listeners are getting it. No, they don't. I'm a listener actually, and I understand. Okay, great. Yeah. God bless you. You don't have to listen to the show. You go micromachine.

I was told I had to. Yeah, we were told we had to or we couldn't show up today. Yeah. I had to listen to every episode ever made. Yeah, pretty weird. You were going micromachine again. You were going micromachine. Do you want me to slow it down?

Uh, yeah. I'll try, I'll, I have a lot of copy to read, so I'll try to slow it down moving forward. I'm not going to reread that. Oh, okay. Do you want me to reread that? I will. No, don't reread it.

Please God. I, I think. Just tell me if this pace is good. And I'll just do this first bullet point. You'll tell me if the space is good. All right, can you read like some sort of sample text instead of what you're going to read instead? He doesn't have sample text.

He likes just laying around. He's like morim, ipsum. All right, let me, let me. Wags, read some of the Pump House, uh, the Pump House Gang. The Pump House Gang, Tom Wolf? Okay, this is the Tom Wolf novel that's part of the Tableau behind us. I'm going to pull this off.

Ania is covering her face because we were like, what the fuck is the Pump House Gang? She's like, it's a classic. This is from Ania. It's a classic. We read the Pump House Gang. We opened it up and it is like the, it's like the Pump House Gang likes to fuck.

It's a horny ass book. Honestly, that's my first assumption. That's what we thought it was too, and that's what it is. Let me find the first. It's a classic. Here we go. Here's the, the drawing that accompanies the Pump House Gang. It is two people fucking on a fence.

You know, however you get it. I mean, I would take that. That's where I'm at in my life. You would sit on that fence. If someone asked me to lie to you. Yes. I honestly don't see where the dick's going. Okay, keep going.

Yeah, I can't really tell honestly. It's a little confusing. I saw Wagar reading that book with a, a, a jeweler's loop. It's got to go in somewhere. And then you were like, can I borrow that? I got to take a piss. I got the real micro machine over here. All right, here we go.

It's, it works. It's a little machine. Our boys never hair out. The black panther has black feet. Black feet on the crumbling black panther, Pantha. Is this MCU? Me die. Pam Stacey, 16 years old.

A cute girl in La Jolla, California. With a pair of orange bell bottom hip huggers on. Sits on a step about four steps down the stairway to the beach. And she can be seen. She can see a pair of revolting black feet without lifting her head. So she says it out loud. The black panther. I don't know if this is problematic or not.

I don't know what is going on here. I think we should turn the camera to Ani and have her explain why it's not. Yeah. Why is it a classic? I'm pretty sure Tom Wolf wrote other books that I think are classics. Got it. We'll look into this. We'll look Homer and Angel.

I know that. Like they teach that in schools. I think he did this maybe before or after. And I wasn't aware of the. He's getting a little loosey goose. Uh huh. I am a wool. This is an essay of collection of essays for what it's worth.

And here's another one. The put together girl. Her tatties are just fucking out there. She has huge hunkers. She thinks she flung them back and they are suspended for a second. There's a crowd of onlookers. So that's what I think happened. I think she's in motion and has like thrown her body back.

And her titties just went. Mitch wants privacy. I'm looking for my library card I'm going to. You can have this. This is yours. All right. I will take home the pump hose. Speed wise though.

Was that okay with the copy? That was perfect. A little more measure. I honestly forgot what you were doing. Yeah. Oh yeah. That's right. We were doing.

I also forgot that we were testing your read speed. I'll bring that. I'm bringing that thing back. It ain't going to open up. Let me tell you that much. It's going to be a correct. Jesus Christ. Ew.

Cover. Ew. Build the next head gum with that thing. Oh no. Well I'll turn off the TV for a second. Well you already said it. Why is she going to turn it off now? You said the horrible thing.

I know it's in my head. Now I see it coming. God damn it. All right. It's fine. It's going to be fine. Mom's going to love it. Well look.

We have some context for Chipotle sweet fin sweet green. I want to get both of your thoughts on any of these chains. Any prior eating experience. Any fandom. Any hatred. I eat sweet green all the time. Wow. Same.

I have had sweet fin once. I have had Chipotle once. Oh my God. Interesting. Once. I had so much Chipotle in my life. Because I worked at a Lane Bryant on 34th Street and across Fifth Avenue. No.

Across 34th Street there was a Chipotle. So we always got Chipotle at lunch. And then they didn't have quesadillas on the menu back then. But then I was like can you just make me a quesadilla? And they're like all right. And I was like oh I'm special. I get something off the menu. And then you get nachos.

Yes. And that's delightful. You just have they won't microwave it. You got to just take it like back to Lane Bryant and microwave it yourself. But I've eaten so much Chipotle. Oh. Wow. I do like Chipotle.

That's funny the good Lane Bryant has a microwave. I guess they have a microwave. Does Lane Bryant have a microwave? It's a bunch of fat women who are like eat my food up. Do they close? They do have clothes. No I mean did they close. Was it all microwaves or do they all have clothes?

No. I thought they went. I thought the whole company was gone. No. No it's not. Okay. No. Thank you.

But the one on 34th Street did close. Okay. But they're still they're still around still kicking. Wow. That's great. Wow. So wait you but you Nicole. Yes.

We're a newcomer as you could say. Wow. For sweet fin. I was I had no idea what sweet fin was. It was not quite for me. Okay. I can't wait to hear. It just there was a lot of stuff going on.

I didn't realize it was like raw fish. Yeah. I got a box so I could taste an array of things. Wow. And my box came leaking. Oh no. That's disgusting. That wasn't fun.

Yeah. And then I was like how long was this sitting in someone's car. Maybe I should have gone and picked it up. But I got sweet potatoes and something maybe forbidden rice. I don't know. That was pretty good. But then I got salmon and then a bunch of other stuff that was not good. And then there was these like noodles with I think an anchovy on top

or some other dead fish that look like fully intact. Like a full fish. It was like a tiny full fish and I did not like that. I don't like that. Well here's the deal. It's bowl. That's right.

So that or is probably eliminated no matter what. Wait why? I just got tiny bowls in a box. Yeah. I think that works. Oh fuck. You can get it because you got the you ordered a small bowl right. A series of small bowls.

I don't know what I'm being about. It was like four small bowls in a box. You're trying to impress mommy. That's the issue. Oh no. Yeah don't impress mommy. She's impressed that he loves mommy. She loves you anyway.

She's impressed by everything as she should be. You're a wonderful son. It's true. We took a picture of ourselves outside of Hank Gump's studio at the Doe Boy sign before we got here. That's nice. That's a Doe Boy step over. I believe human shit to take it.

You have to. You have to. It's a lie. It's a lie. Yeah yeah yeah. I like when you don't know. You know. It's just big though and you wonder.

Yeah. But the big ones I'm like that's definitely from a person. Sometimes yeah. Nice big log. I find it's often accompanied by toilet paper and that's a real tell. Unless it's a very tidy dog. Yeah.

Which would be cute. I feel like I've ever seen toilet paper with shit. I've definitely seen that. I've definitely seen toilet paper like on top of shit or near shit. Yeah. If you had that. Why are you shitting on the floor?

I think it's just probably a desperation play. It's just like fuck I got a shit. I got no place else to shit. I'm just going to do it. I call the ground the floor and that's a pet peeve of mine and I want to just correct that. I understand that the ground is not the floor. Right.

Yeah. That's fair. Thanks. Well the floor. Which would I eat off of? If I drop something on the floor I'd probably eat it still. Depends on the floor. Depends on the floor.

Bathroom floor. Hell no. Barber shop floor. No. Nothing. No way. Why are you eating in the bathroom? I'm just saying I'm just talking floors.

I don't eat in the bathroom. You're eating at the barbershop? You're eating at the bathroom? Sometimes I'll find myself on the toilet finishing something that I was eating. Interesting. No? Really?

I'm having a chip. I'm walking into the bathroom. I'm eating the chip as I am going to the bathroom. That's not crazy. No that's not crazy. That's not crazy. I'm not saying like a dish. Yeah.

I'm thinking like you got your little plate. I don't need to mix it that bad. It's not like why there's three-quarters meal in the fucking bathroom. There was. I don't eat in the bathroom. I find that disgusting. I'm pretty hygienic and pretty neat as a person.

But I did have a coworker. Not a guy I worked with and it was in a different department but at a job I had at an old Fox building and he would go get a huge box. Fox building? Yeah. One of the Fox. It was not on the lot.

It was like a Fox separately. Got it. Got it. The company, the corporation. What do you think it was, Sino? I didn't understand what you meant by that. I never knew that you worked in a Fox building. I didn't have to give that context.

I just confused everything. But I never knew this above. I was working for a fuel TV show and Fox was the only fuel TV and so that was at a Fox building, a corporate office. Okay, right, great. All this context is unnecessary. He just wanted to learn about you.

Yes. Yes. It's not. I cannot entertain any of this. I worked in the first. He might. A long time. Maybe.

I worked at The Simpsons. Well, when I worked that job, I went and saw, I visited you. You gave me rides on the golf cart. I was working the fuel TV show. You were working at The Simpsons. That was one of my things. I gave people, I gave Scott Baio a ride. Wow, I wouldn't brag about that.

Scott Baio. I gave James Woods a ride. Mark Wahlberg. Wahlberg was great. Actually, that is, all those people I just said, I saw on the Fox lot. Wow. John Voight, right?

You had a good interaction with John Voight. I had a great interaction with John Voight and that was on the Sony lot. I got in the car and he was like, how are you doing, young actor, sir? And I was like, I'm going to do voiceover. And he was like, that's great. And he was just being really nice to me.

Yeah. And I was like, I kind of liked him. I know he's not. I know he has bad politics. I don't really know anything about him. Is George Angelina Jolie. Pretty conservative. That's all I know.

Yeah. Pretty, pretty, kind of a. Yeah, he's kind of a dick. He like tweets rude things. A little bit of a right-wing, brainworms-y sort of guy, you know, a good actor. But anyway, the story, the short of the story is that a guy would go,

he would get a huge bag of Jack in the Box, go into the men's room and take it directly into the handicapped stall. And like that was, that was like a compulsion. That's fucking disgusting. Why would you, why would you do that? Why? I don't know.

He had some weird thing about him. Maybe it was like a shame associated with eating this trash or maybe it just, he just immediately had to shit and he had no disgust factor at all. Some people that don't have like a little. Man, just immediate? I mean, maybe.

Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. Full fries. Can we go to your house? Oh, sweet. How terrifying the first time that happens. Oh, a fry came out of me. I just, I don't want to eat in a bath,

like there's smells. No, of course not. What if someone comes in and like shits next to you? Yeah, that's the worry. I was going to ask you a question about Fox. Oh, I want to say when Mark Wahlberg saw me. When he saw you. Uh-huh.

Yeah. Well, it kind of, it kind of was that because I was like driving by when they were filming something. Oh, sorry. And he went, hey, I've said this before. We went, hey, nice jacket because I had on a Boston Red Sox jacket.

Nice. And I was like, thank you. I know it's not a great story. No, it is a fantastic story. And I'm sure Mark Wahlberg thinks about you every night before bed. Every night before bed. He's like, oh, I saw that guy.

Yeah, get my prayer in. Now, time to go to bed at 6 p.m. Just to get up at 2 o'clock. Yeah. He wakes up at 2 o'clock to work out. Does he really? He does. He once revealed his schedule

and it was quite insane. It's a little on a hinge. It's like similar to the Doe Boys. If you come on tour with us, you'll know. Nicole, you've been there. Like we get up at 4 a.m. We pray, we work out. Yeah, that's right.

We'll play around at golf. And the 4 a.m. prayer is my favorite thing. Oh boy. I love it so much. Look, you guys scream them, right? Yeah, we scream into the heavens. Look, we have some business to get to. Wait, have you ever gone to the bathroom

in Home Depot before? Yes, Home Depot is the place to pee if you're on the road. Is this true? I mean, they always have a bathroom and it's always available and no one's there to be like, are you an actual shopper?

Yeah. But it will be on the opposite end of where you enter. So if you really got to go, just know that. Go straight there. You got a hike to get in there. I don't think I've done that, but I have gone to the bathroom

in most bathrooms that exist, I think. You know, I find like, I wish target bathrooms were better. I know. Me too. I was in there today. I've been in there a bunch. I might take a Home Depot bathroom.

I did not. I was just taking a shit in Target today. We shopped at Target. But then you took a shit. Yeah, I just took a shit. Does TJ Maxx's have bathrooms? They do. Yes.

Yeah. I think they're great. No, no, no. A lot of times I think of like a great bathroom. Oh, who has a good one? Sprouts is a local, I mean, actually I think it's actually a national grocery chain now,

but Sprouts, the grocery chain, has a pretty decent bathroom. Trader Joe's, I feel like, is pretty decent. Yeah, they don't all have them, but the ones that do do. I feel like it would be a nice bathroom and I feel like when you leave, someone would be like,

did you find everything okay? Yeah, thank you. You know, you wipes in? Yeah, I got all of them. Yeah, I got them all. I think I got every one of them. I think so. Is that what you mean?

Have either of you ever traveling or touring been to a buck ease? Because I feel like they have a nice bathroom. No, but I really extensively researched buckies at one point because I heard about it and then I was on like, it's like a gas station

or like a gas stop, rest stop, but it's huge. It has like everything ever and it's all like really fun. Got a big gopher with, I guess a woodchuck. He's got big teeth. Yeah, yeah, buck teeth.

Yeah, yeah, buck teeth. Oh, I see. He's funny. No, I've never been. Yeah, he's funny. He's funny. He tells Joe. I mean, I don't know if he's ever said a word ever,

but he's funny. He's hilarious. He's so funny. He's really funny. He looks funny. Yeah. He looks, he's fun. He's a fun mascot.

Why, because the three restaurants we went to today, mascot lists, if you would say, I think. That's a good point. Does it affect the outcome we're going to find out? But yeah, there's no mascots for any of these. There's a kind of new wave chains that have kind of dispensed with that tradition. I think that these three are perfect

in the way that they are very boring work launches, except for one is a little outside the box, which is funny because it came in a box. He's so mad. I'm sorry that it came in a box. I should have ordered the bowls separately. I will say the presentation of my sweet fin was really cute.

I took a picture of it. Oh, you did? Yeah, it was just very cute with the stickers and the little labels. Yeah, mine was cute too. It was hard to get in. I had to rip mine open. Yeah.

It was cute. That's kind of the craziest one. The other two to me are so work-lunchy wigs. They're completely, when I think of work-lunches, it's like back in the day, Tender Greens was amongst this group, but sweet greens, Chipotle, you're in a writer's room or whatever.

You're shooting something. These are things that you always- Or have a job. Sure, you know what I'm talking about. You got an outside hall. No, Weiger. If you're an actor or in a writer's room, those are the only two jobs people have.

Let's try to relate to our guests, why? Because I don't give a shit what these fucking people back home, these peons, what they do. Peons? The piss pigs. Piss pigs. And I will pee on you.

The Reddit later, like... Don't clip that. I think Mitch actually hates the peons, like he's pretending to be elitist, but he's actually elitist. I love when you guys talk about Reddit, because they're like that. They're going to be so mad at you for that.

Here's what we want to know. My mom and I went to Nobu for dinner last night. Wow, that's crazy. We did have an elitist. It's like where the Lakers go for a team dinner. That's such fancy food. So fancy. Yeah.

We were in Malibu. I was filming this very small budget thing in Malibu with Gabriel. And I saw a picture on the internet. I think I saw one, too. And it looks like a lot of fun people. We were having a blast. And then the saddest thing of all was my mom was like,

invite Gabriel. There was no cell service, because in Malibu, I was like, you can come and join us. That sucks. You could have free Nobu. I once made Gabriel's walk to a sweet green in Philadelphia for like two miles. I was like, I want sweet green when he was like, all right.

Two miles. Yeah, it wasn't that. I don't know if it was that one. Well, he likes walking. That's nice. I would never forgive you. And he was like, this is where you want to eat? He could go anywhere.

I was like, I want this. I had just heard about it. And I was like, this sounds good. And we're going to do a show. You don't want to feel nasty. 100%. Why doesn't I have almost similar? You want to get salads if we're traveling

and we're in New York or something like that. And I want to eat the highest, the tallest pastrami sandwich in the city. Right. So how was Nobu? I didn't mean to interrupt you. Oh, Nobu, we had a fantastic time. It's sushi, right?

There is sushi. That's like an aspect of the meal. Oh, it's not all sushi. Not all, yeah. Yeah, it's yeah. There's cold dishes, hot dishes. Sushi in the middle. We just walked in and they gave us a spot.

Is it like an omakase? You can do an omakase, which I did. Yeah. A what? Omakase, it's like they choose for you. It's like, here's your food. A lot of fun. I love that.

I love making fewer decisions. You have to be adventurous though. Yes, yeah. I'm not adventurous. I'd be so upset. Yeah. So angry. We met like a great German couple

that were sitting next to us last night. This is true. Really? At the end of the night, I was like, this is the truth. At the end of the night, I was like, hey, I want to ask what your dish was. It looked really good.

And then I was like, oh, they're German. I had no idea. And they were like, she was like. Do your German accent. She was like, my husband and I were watching you and we were just enjoying how much you were eating. Oh my god. And then they had.

So crazy. And they were like, you were loving all your dishes. They were like saying this. They were like, we loved how much you loved your dishes. And I was like, oh yeah, I was having like a blast. And then I loved them. That's really like cute. But it is cute.

But I would be heartbroken. So I was like, you were just enjoying every single piece of food. I'm like, are you watching me? Yeah, truly. It feels like a warrior. Like you didn't know. I loved these two so much. And I was like, I was thinking about going to Germany.

And they're like, you have to come to our restaurant. So they were going around LA. We will watch you enjoy the food. We'll come out of the kitchen and stare at you. They were like, you got to come. They owned a restaurant in Germany. I'll figure out the name of it. And we'll play it at some point.

Do you know the city? Munich. I was going to guess Munich. In Munich, why Spielberg made the movie about it? Munich. Yes. That famous movie about the city of Munich. Spielberg's Munich.

Yes. So they have a restaurant in there. And then the guy at the end was standing up. And he had his arm around him. He was like, you're my friend. And he was like, we're going to go. It is like, I hope that you're ready for chaos. That's what he said to me.

And I was like, oh, what? Well, Germany apparently is like a party country. Like Berlin. People stay out all night. And then go to work the next day from what I hear. They were really, he seemed like he wanted to do something. You got to go. I mean, I want to, and because I was like,

Mike just wants to go for like the local, Mike just wanted to go for like the local Oktoberfest. He's like, no, you got to come for the regular Oktoberfest. It's awesome. So I'm figuring out, I followed him on Instagram. It's cool. We're talking. Yeah.

Followed his wife. Oh my God. Yeah, followed his wife. OK, great. First and only. Possibly this, they might be down with that. We'll find out. I just love that they watched you eat your food and enjoy it.

They were like, oh, he loves this. Yeah. Opus. Oh, he's eating so much. And we love this. We just couldn't stop staring at you. I did kind of feel like, you know, like in Russia, they have like big bears and cages,

like eating things and throwing balls. It probably was similar to that. Wait, what do they have in Russia? They have like big bears outside of cages, right? Outside of cages? I looked at Anya. Anya, you are Russian and she's shaking her head, no. What are you talking about?

Big bears outside of cages. Your point of reference for, yeah. If the people go in the cage, the bears can go wherever they want. Look, no one fact-checked this. It's just the thing that happens. I think there are bears in cages. Bears with like a red ball.

I know what you're talking about. I think in Russia, there is a thing like, we're outside of a restaurant, so bears in cages outside the restaurant. Are you thinking of the bears? We really are. Anya is incensed. She's outraged.

This is like, What does she know? She's fucking the pump house gang. That's her favorite book. Your entire point of reference for Russian culture is Zangief. What is that? What's Zangief?

Zangief is from Street Fighter. Okay, so Zangief is from Street Fighter. He was characterized in Wack-It Ralph as a bad guy, and I challenge that because he's a Russian hero. He's not a bad guy. It was Cold War sort of thinking to be like, we're going to cast him as a bad guy, when M. Bison is clearly the bad guy in Street Fighter.

Yeah, in my mind, I'm also like. Who's M. Bison? Is it? I don't know. Do you don't know who M. Bison is? No, I did play on a Street Fighter growing up, and I went to Barcade recently and played Street Fighter, which was really fun.

Who's your favorite character? Chun-Li. Chun-Li's great. Yeah. I know Chun-Li, because Nicki Minaj has a song called Chun-Li. That's cool. Let me just tell you that I,

once I said the Russian bear thing, and then looked over and on, and you guys were all like, what are you talking about? My glasses fogged up like three times as much. I can't fucking see shit. Just take them off. Take them off.

I like it. It's like piss-missing. I know. Yeah, it is. It is. It is kind of piss-missing. Piss-miss. Yeah.

Take them off, Mitch, and look at that monitor, and then just relive all of that from a few seconds ago. God damn it. Sucks. Look, we got to talk about bowls. We do. And this edition of the Tournament of Champions,

as they all do, has a lengthy series of arcane rules as decreed by Commissioner Susser. So Anya, it's time to play the theme for Choo Rules. Start the clock. Good afternoon. It seems these days, unless you eat plant-based,

you're getting canceled for daring to enjoy flavor. Well, I think the woke left needs to stop acting like Stalin, get a job at a bowl place, and stop Stalin on making my bowl. Only problem is no one wants to work anymore. Choo rules. Choo rule.

Number one. Who are you texting? Salad ain't valid. Bowl is the goal. No salads. Yeah, who are you texting? Who are you texting? Who are you texting

during this live stream? Trantically texting. Just breathe in heavy. Who is it? I'm texting. Are you texting Bart to try to get him to edit stuff out of the live stream?

I'm texting Amelia telling her we should order those pizzas. I told her earlier she ordered the pizzas so they arrive after the show. Hosted. Need to check in on her. She's got it.

Rule. Rule number two. Chili is silly. Chili is not considered. Rule number three. Stew won't do. Bowl Viscosity must be above stew level at a minimum.

We want goop, not soup. Rule number four. This is a Mitch addendum. Gru will do. Discussion of Gru at any age is allowed. Rule number five. Have you covered Despicable Me at all? Yeah.

Oh, no. And I've never seen those movies. Oh, I've seen The Minions movie. Hell yeah. I love Minions. Hell yeah. And then Rise of Gru. I've seen half of

because I fell asleep on the plane but I need to finish it because I really like it. I think I might like Minions. Minions are a lot of fun. It's a great film. They're really funny. I think they're so funny.

I love that bad. It's great. It's so funny. It's so good. They're so funny. I love it. I once tried to make Sashir watch The Minions movie

while we were on a plane. So I watched her watch it and then when she didn't laugh at the things I laughed at I would poke her and say why didn't you laugh? And that lasted 15 minutes before she was like,

I can't watch a movie like this. Yeah. But yeah, I love The Minions. It's so weird to just hear him say he loves it because he just says it like in the same tone he says with everything

and you don't know if he likes anything. Like I know he likes video. I like a lot of things. I know you like video. I like you. I like my friend Mitch. Okay.

Whoa. How about that? I love you, man. I love you too. You guys really love each other. We do love each other. We love each other. We talk to each other a lot.

It's kind of, you know, we get our fill of each other, you could say. But we love each other. We get our fill of each other. We get our fill of each other. Get our fill of each other. Well, you guys spend a lot of time together.

I mean, probably more time with each other than most other people in your lives. Like more time than your lovely wife. Oh my God. That's so fucking depressing. Do I spend more time with Mitch than Natalie? I don't think so.

I don't think that's true. Okay. Because you don't sleep in the same bed. That's true. Some competition, Natalie. Yeah. Well, you and Natalie don't sleep in the same bed either.

That's true. So that's a wash. And when we're on tour, we do sleep in the same bed. That's true. So I actually point Mitch. Yeah. Rule number five,

when it comes to strikes where the bully yelling at the batter's box, that's right. Strikes aren't bad. They're good. Three strikes, you're in. Wow. Rule number six,

this is another Mitch addendum. Two strikes, you're also in. That's right. That's called a 7-10 split decision. Rule number seven, drinks are in the gutter. Sides are also in the gutter. Rule number eight,

however, drinks are in the nutter. Sides are also in the nutter, which means you can consider both. Rule number nine, I've never heard it. Cookies aren't oaky. But are they also Christmassy? Cookies may not be considered,

but every guest must be asked the question, is Christmas a cookie holiday? Now, I don't think this rule is still valid, despite your lovely mom declaring that Christmas is officially a cookie holiday. Sure. Yeah, we can hear from you. We can ask our guests.

This closes the book on it. Is Christmas a cookie holiday? Yeah. Yeah. I think what else is? A good point. A good point. That's a great point.

Part of the review. Part of the review. There's no Easter cookies. Maybe Valentine's Day. I feel like that's chocolate. I think you're right. I think it is a chocolate holiday. Yeah, Christmas is definitely a cookie holiday.

I brought cookies. Oh, ho, ho, ho. Yeah, cookie parties. I just want to set up of what the scenario was there. I'm dressed as Santa, obviously. And my friend Lauren has brought cookies. And I said, ho, ho, ho. Beautiful.

So Laura came over. So was it just like a gathering between the two of you? Yeah, just two guys. I popped by. You know, I'm just in my house. I'm in my Christmas outfit. And I brought cookies. I said, ho, ho, ho.

Checks out. Thank you. It's normal. That's what we do. Rule number 10, when it comes to bread, there's more that will be said. This is live, dude. It's live.

Whoa. Rule number 11. Yeah, if I can take it again. Chips are also bread. Hey, take a look at your right. Bar yourself, fuck up. Fuck. Oh, that's so mean.

He did it to me two seconds ago. Really? I don't know. It just seemed really mean when you did it. Oh, my god. Damn it. Nice, man. But on the edge, I'm trying to,

we're going shopping for stuff. Take the glasses off if you want. No, no, it's fine. No, honestly, I didn't like it as much when you took them off. I feel like it does just well. It does completely. I think also my eyes get wider with glasses.

Whoa. Whoa. Whoa, they kind of do. Wow. Wow. I've never seen your pupil before. But I genuinely, I really liked them. I recently got some yellow eyes.

You got green eyes? I love it. They're brown. You know, they're hazel. Hazel eyes. Oh. Behind these hazel eyes. Is that a song?

Kelly Clarkson. I don't know. Yes. I love it. There's a brown eyes song. Here I am. Brown eyes. Yes, again.

Brownie girl. I'm torn into pieces. Can't deny. I know this song. That's the song? That's the hazel song? Yeah. Wow.

I didn't realize it either. You should make it your ringtone. You should. I think I will. Not right now. Okay. All right. Sorry.

When the levee breaks is my ringtone right now. There's a, now I'm just thinking of eyes songs. There's, there's a brown eyed girl and then there's also, no one knows what it's like to be the sad man behind blue eyes. That's one. You started very early. Behind blue eyes. Never.

Yeah. Yeah. Who sings that? That's old. I don't know. There's a limp biscuit cover. I love limp biscuit. Uniromphly.

That can't be true. I love limp biscuit. That can't be true. You know why? My hot take is I love bear naked ladies. I, someone commented on that. I literally listened to bear naked ladies very barely. I don't know a bear naked ladies.

I probably do. What is one? Well, it's been one week. Oh yes. They do like that song. That's a fun song. They're good. They're good.

They have a lot of other songs. Aren't they? I like that Nookie song by Limp Biscuit. I cheated it off for the Nookie. The what? The Nookie. A song that references? That cookie.

I just took it off your ass. That's the song you like. It's great. That's her mantra. I bought a limb. I bought chocolate starfish. Starfish and the hot dog flavored water. I bought that too.

Which is a disgusting cowl inside of it. Yeah, it's disgusting. Hot dog flavored water. Yeah. It means bottled. Honestly, no. I know that. Oh no.

Do you not know that? No. Chocolate starfish means butthole. And then when it's hot dog flavored. You're the one who loves this band. The second it was said, I'm picturing an asshole. And then what's the hot dog flavored water? I think the hot dog flavored water

is just like a random thing. It's just to make you feel grown. It just sounds kind of gross. Oh. Well, I like the album that came before it. There's like a man on it and he's like stopping in his red shoes and it's a blue album cover.

I don't know what the album's called though. It was one of the things he did a couple of times with like Red Man and Method Man that I thought were good, but those guys are good. So I don't know how much I will go on a line to stand up for Fred Durst. Here's what I'll stand up with for Fred Durst.

You know, I'm a fan of jazz music. He has a jazz night he hosts. He pays everyone. I fuck. He comes out. He's like, he's like, and he's just like, I just love jazz music. And he doesn't like go up there

and do like a piano solo or anything to like make it about himself. He just sort of hosted and introduced his local jazz music. Oh, I like that. Here in LA? Yeah, yeah. I gotta go see Fred Durst. I think you can go to it.

I don't know if it's still happening. This was pre-COVID. So I'm not going to re-continue. There's also the Jeff Goldblum. Goldblum's got his own thing. People go on there like, Goldblum's a Zaddy and they take photos with Goldblum. I've seen that show and that is fun,

but that is very much the Jeff Goldblum show. He's up there playing piano and like, I'm Jeff Goldblum doing movie trivia and stuff. I almost played my head. Careful, you almost played your water right off the fucking table. We got to talk about these various changes. Let's start with Sweet Finn.

He's spilled almost every episode this month. He has an issue with spilling. We know. Is it spilling? Yeah, I'm okay. Okay. Well, maybe if you put it on the little desk over there, the little side table.

I'm worried that'll be worse, but I will try. Well, let's see what happens. Okay. Well, then it won't hit your computer. It's out of my peripheral vision is the issue. Oh, I see. I could see myself gesturing wildly forgetting it's there. That's going to be so hard to do that.

You have to chop. No, no, I see. I see how it should happen. Let's just see what happens. We'll leave it there for now. And it's fine. And they also might drink it less compulsively, which is probably better.

What's in there? Hot tea. Ooh, that's nice. I'm going to joke it was a hurricane from New Orleans, but it's poison. That was going to be mine. That's funny. That's good.

It's going to be a callback, I guess you could say. Yeah, that's a callback. I'm glad you did it. It's a callback. I love it. I mean, you could have honestly just should have committed to it. It would have been great.

Yeah, yeah. Sort of like referencing what you would have done and then kind of half bailing on it. Yeah, yeah. That's the way I was going to do it. Commit to the bits. What's that? You got to commit to your bit.

I know, I know. Trust yourself. You're a funny guy. Like the way you were texting. That was real committed. It was wild just looking over here. She was like, oh, I want to tell her to get a grandma pie. What's that?

That's a grandma pie. She's, here's, all right. So you said, I did. I ordered three pies and then two people just left. So I hope you like leftovers. Who left? We have walkers on the show in head gum. Fucking Amir's walking out.

What the fuck's going on? Wow. Your mother said, I'm done. I'm left. What's a grandma pie? The grandma pie is a specific pie from tomato pie. That's very good. It's not unique to tomato pie, but it is like,

it's like a thicker with a tomato sauce. A little Sicilian-esque. Yeah, I don't know if she got one or not. But anyways, it doesn't matter. It's gonna be fine. I'm excited to have pizza. Me too. I've never had tomato pie.

Are you sure we shouldn't just talk about pizza? It seems like we all like pizza. Pizza's pretty good. I love pizza. We can get a quick take on pizza, but we gotta get to bowls. Well, I like that it starts round, but ends up triangle. I never thought of that either. So good.

That's fucking genius. That's really good. That like broke my brain a little. That's genius. Shit. Fucking smart. Now every time I see a pizza, I'll be like, are you gonna change mine?

Yep. That's genius shit. That's genius. That's great. Yeah, I'm really smart. So Sweet Fin is... Can I just say my favorite pizza's from a ghost kitchen? Please.

A ghost kitchen? Uh-huh. Is that the name of a place? No. Like, do you know what a ghost kitchen is? No. So like, on your postmates, they'll be like, oh, here's lasagna stop.

And then like lasagna grill or whatever. And it'll just sound similar. They're all coming from the same place. Yes. And I think mine is from... What? It's like Steve Aoki pizza or something? Yeah.

Yeah, it's really... Oh, Steve Aoki, yeah. Yeah, he's Pete Aoki. Or yeah, Pete Aoki. And his dad, right, why? Dad was the founder of Benihana. And a famous fuck machine. Had a point where he had impregnated

three different women at the same time. Out of Benihana? What's literal fuck machine? Because Ben, me, over that hot grill. He was a fuck machine. He invented a fuck machine that impregnated people. That was his true genius. Teppanyaki was the second, the side hustle.

Who are you texting now? Amelia again, it's still about the pizzas. Look, I'm gonna say this. She's gotta cover it. It's gonna be fine. I was gonna say this, laugh kiss. Yeah. What you just said, I was drunk one night

and I thought I came up with a great quote. Okay. And I just looked it up. I can't wait. I can't wait. I can't wait. I can't wait. I can't wait.

Please. The older you get, the shorter life seems. God, you're dumb. I mean, yeah. That was funny. When did you write that? I was drunk. How long ago was this?

It was recent. This was last night. That was just a couple weeks ago. And you didn't remember what it was. I was like, this is a good saying. He had to go look it up. I think it was when the Quincy boys were in town. It might have been St. Patrick's Day.

Anyways. Yeah, but you were having like a deep moment. The hair were like crying. Yeah, yeah. You're getting sad about your mortality. Yeah, yeah. And I also wrote an alt under it. I'm not gonna show.

I need to hear the alt. I'm not gonna say the alt. Please do. No, I need to know. I don't. I mean, it's just like he's very close to the last one. Okay. He was punching up his own.

Yes. It's only when you are old that you realize life is short. Jesus Christ. I thought I had old. I was like, this is good stuff. No one's ever thought of this. Did you text this to people? Or did you just write it in the notes app?

I'm putting my notes out. I'm all to us. Wait. Is your notes app just like a little bit? I just wrote it in the notes app. I mean, it's just like, it's not like I'm like, what the hell is going on. I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, what the hell.

Oh, I'm like, what the hell is this? I'm like, what the hell is this? Oh, I'm like, what the hell is this? I'm like, it's just like a little bit of a video. It's just like, when you're in town, wait, is your notes app just like filled with quotes that you've thought of drunk? There's a lot of different things in here.

I was looking through it right just to find that, and I wrote down Stinky LaRue, which is what I call my cat, just to remember what I call my cat. That's cute. That's cute. Why would you forget? Yeah, why would you forget?

Because I forget stuff all the time. Does that not, we're older. It's going to happen to you guys in a few years. It's true. I've realized. But you like see your cat and you're like, I knew I had a good idea for you. What do I call you, Stinky LaRue.

Stinky LaRue. That's really funny. Which cat do you call Stinky LaRue? Wally is Stinky LaRue. And we're most cute little baby angels. Oh. So Wally's like, Wally touched Grandma last night. He slept at my mom's.

Oh no. How did that actually react? You're going to have to give him away. I throw him up on the top of Griffith Park. I just let him go. Oh my God. No, I would never do that. I love Wally.

Do you have one of those self-cleaning kitty litter things? I do. It's called a little robot. I do have one. Is it good? My mom has been, she's like, what is that noise? Well, she's been here. She's like, what is that robotic noise?

And it's the little, when they go in a little robot after about seven minutes. Oh, it knows when they go? There's sensors in the box. So they know if a cat's in there. If I try to get in there, it's like human. And it's like, oh. Alert, alert, alert.

We cannot contain this shit. I would pay very good money to watch you shit in a litter robot. I would pay. I would pay good money. I'd pay $15. $15? So they could pay maybe $1,000? $1,000.

I think I'd pay a good $1,000 from the two of us. So would it be just you know me and the embarrassment I'd have doing it? Or do you think it would be fun to watch me try to get it? I think that, because I know how big they are, it'd be fun to see if you could get in it, how you would stay squatting, see if those knees work, and then, yeah.

It would probably be very similar to the, if you saw us pledging allegiance at the beginning of the episode. It would probably look very similar to that. What is the opening? Is this a front loader? Is it a top loader? How do you get in there?

It's an oval shape, and then you kind of walk, the cats walk upstairs and walk in. Okay. So it's kind of like an igloo sort of shape? There is more stairs in my house. I do have cat stairs, too. Wow. Adding to the tally.

Adding to the tally of my stairs. I have like 60 stairs in my house. You have 60 stairs in your house? I have around 60 stairs. So do you have two flights? Or three flights? There's three flights of stairs. Oh, so you know, as a listener,

I've only been privy to one flight. There's three. It's three flights. Okay. There's three. Yeah. There's three flights. So you have three levels in your house?

It's mostly stairs. We talk about that. Wow. It is mostly stairs. Each room is on its own floor kind of thing. Yeah, it's like a row house sort of thing. Row house? Okay.

Isn't that what we call it? Or town house, I guess. I guess row house is this kind. Row house is fun. That's like what I think that's what they call them in England. Yeah, okay. Here they call them town houses, but I like row houses.

Which we all know. We call them row houses back home. Yeah, obviously. Obviously, in your row home. But three flights. 60. Do you ever give up if you leave something upstairs? Sometimes that's annoying.

Let me tell you, all the fucking time. Yeah, am I getting that? My mom was like, I need, she was like, need nail clippers or something. And I'm like, I'm not gonna go fucking get them there. You need to put stuff on every floor, all the basics. That's what I did.

Because my mom came on the floor, she was like, why is there a toothbrush in this bathroom? Yeah. And I'm not gonna get into bathrooms. I'm not gonna tell, I shouldn't be telling people this stuff. No, but I do think this is, that's helpful though. It's to have two toothbrushes. It's like, it's annoying.

You're gonna go all the way up every time you forgot. And oh my God. That's right. What's the cost of an extra toothbrush? It's fine. And you'll get used out of both of them eventually. It's fine. So I have a fridge on every floor.

There's multiple fridges on that floor. Is that true? No. No, that can't be true. But that's also sad that you thought that. I believed it immediately. A mini fridge. Or mini fridge for bevies.

I don't have a mini fridge for bevies. Am I, though I do kind of want one in my bedroom. I think that's a good idea. I think that would be nice. If you have room. People don't have as much fun in their bedrooms. Like when you see Pee-wee, Pee-wee Herman, you know, you're like, that is,

that, why don't more adults do that? No, it's for sleep. That's the thing, you have to designate your bedroom for two things. What's the other one? Well, I'm getting it on. It sucks. The hotel, the old thing we say.

Yeah. Mapping, crapping, fapping. Yeah, but I'm not fucking taking it. Mapping, crapping, and fapping. That's your thing that you've said. That's my genius. You should write that down. Yeah, she should have written that down.

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That's wildgrain.com slash doughboys, or you can use promo code DOBOYS at checkout. Do it. All right, let's get to the bowls, Wags. Yeah, we have 11 minutes left in the show. No, we started late. We have a little bit more time, but we have a lot of bowls to discuss.

Sweet Finn is only in California. That's my one strike against him, because I really like Sweet Finn, and I wish it had more of a national footprint. But, Nicole, you started with your Sweet Finn already. I also don't like the name. It's like biting into a fish's fin. It seems weird.

Here's my take. No. Yeah. Sweet Finn, Sweet Green, I think this is the closest alphabetically two chains have ever been. Sweet F, Sweet EG, the first six letters are one letter apart. Dude, holy shit.

Isn't that what about Burger King and Burger Ling? That's another good one. It's another good one. And dude, you love Burger Ling. I love Burger Ling, and they're all the time. I love the slopper. The slopper! I would order something called the slopper.

I'd fucking want 100% against the slopper. I don't think you'll get the slopper. Well, which brings me to one of my complaints about Chipotle. But can we jump around? Are we going in order? What are we doing? Let's stick with Sweet Finn for now,

because we'll get to Chipotle. Oh, okay. Fucking shot down. No, I want to be shot down. I want to be shot down. I want to be shot down. No, I'm saving it for the combo. It was like that one up Sweet Green

and Sweet Frangiprop. Burger Ling. Speed to M. It makes no sense. No, I got the logic. I got the logic. It makes no sense. It makes no fucking sense.

It was funny, though. It was funny, though. Yeah, it was good. Sweet Finn, let's start there. I will say, I'm not eating meat this month. For the purposes of this tournament, I am like, I want all these bowls to be able to satisfy some of the wheat's plate base.

So that's what I did with this one. I got the miso eggplant and mushroom poke bowl. This one has miso sesame soy sauce, Japanese eggplant, shimeji mushroom, sun-dried tomato, market radish. I added tofu to have a little bit of protein in there. Vegan. I thought this was delightful.

Just stacked with flavor. Just a pile of umami. I thought this one was really hitting Mitch. And you and I got Sweet Finn at the same day. Who are you texting? I am now looking at my Sweet Finn border. Oh, okay. I know, I left my phone out there.

I left my phone out there, too. You can go get your phones. Can I? I mean, if you want. Well, I would like to know what I got. Let me go get my phone. Yeah. I'll get both of them.

Okay. Casey is going to get the phone. Mine's terrible. Mine's pink. Casey, while you're out there, can you ask Mrs. Mitchell if she's liking the show? Okay, thank you. Casey's going to get a check-in from Mitch's mom.

I got tested immediately to find out what my Sweet Finn border was. I can't believe I didn't do this. I'm on the group text and you're texting her about pizza. When's the pizza coming? Yeah. Where's my pizza? I'm just writing asking.

I love pizza. Susser just texted that he has to leave. So thanks, Susser. Oh, wow. All right, bye. Yeah. We love you, Suss. We love you, Suss.

Thanks, buddy. Casey is back. Pones have been retrieved. Casey, you didn't go through their fucking bags, did you? Oh, my God. I hope you did. There's nothing but trash in there. Oh, that's wonderful.

Wow. Fucking liar. All right. Fucking liar. All right, Mitch, talk through your order. You can find my screen grabs here. Why? It's just a moment.

Oh, you haven't found it yet. It's no. It's coming just in one moment. Okay, my order for sweet fin. Yes, sweet fin, the one we did first. Yeah. We're talking about sweet fin. All right, why don't we go to the guest first?

Okay, I had the classic tuna poke bowl. I got a small with bamboo rice, yellowfin tuna, miso, sesame, bean sprouts, red onion, seaweed salad, cucumbers, edamame, and avocado. And then I also got the taro chips, taro chips. And then I also got a kid's bowl for my daughter because I thought I'll try this angle of the podcast. Kid's menu thought it wouldn't be raw, but it was. So I didn't feed it to her because she's a baby and I don't know if that was a good idea.

But it looked really cute. It had bamboo rice, salmon, mango, and miso, sesame. I really liked my bowl. I thought it was delicious. It's a great healthy. It feels like a fun, fresh option. Like I don't usually think of it, but I have ordered from there before. I do think ordering a raw item to your house.

Yeah. A little bit questionable because you're like, how long ago was it made? I sort of had that thought and was like, I kind of wish I ate it at the place, but also because I've never been to one of those places and I don't know what they're like. So that's my main feeling. But it was really tasty and I liked the chips. Those taro chips are hitting. They're fucking good as hell.

We love the taro chips, which we decided to include in. But all the bets are off. The categories are scategories, as Sus said, which I don't know what that means. But those chips, which we were eating in the place of the bread, we really enjoyed those chips. Great chips. A real highlight. I didn't like the chips.

Wow. Well, I didn't like that. I got a... Call me Sally. Okay, Sally. I got a signature bowl with Yuzo. Am I saying that right? Yuzo, I think.

Yuzi, say it. It's with a Yuzi, I think. Yuzu salmon with citrus kale. And then the second bowl was sweet potato ponzu lime with forbidden rice. That one I really liked. I've had that one before. It's good. That one was really tasty.

I liked it a lot. The salmon, it's the texture for me. I don't think I like raw fish. And then my box was leaking. And it was leaking from the side with the fish part. And then I didn't like that too much. And then there was these weird noodles. That I didn't choose.

Noodles? Yeah. And I think they had an anchovy on it. No, I don't like that. Yes, you mentioned those. That feels like a strong... So wait, was this sort of a... Like it's a sort of option you can pick where it gives you some like basics?

So I got to pick the two bowls and then there was two other compartments where they just gave me stuff. Yeah. One was like a salad, I think. And then there was like three little sauces. I tried. What did I try? Oh, shit. There was like a hot something that was pretty good.

But yeah, I didn't like the salmon. I didn't like the weird salad. And then I didn't like the noodles. Hey. This sounds not good for sweet fin for you. Yeah. I'm now watching the show on my phone. Don't do that.

Why are you doing that to yourself? Is it good? You're also on the head gum Wi-Fi, which we need to be able to stream the show. I'm actually not on the head gum Wi-Fi. Okay. I'm on a 5G network, which does get people sick, so I should get off of it. Okay, here we go. I got my order in.

Amelia has sent it to me. And my order was this, Wags. It was, and I'll say this, just a note. Yeah. Because Amelia made this note that Joe Saunders, who ate with us, he said he'd get his, he'll have his bowl mitch's way. So that's what he said. So fun.

I don't know if it will catch on. Okay. So he went into the restaurant and said that. He went into the restaurant and said that. He was kicked out. He was like, I want it mitch's way. And it was just shitting on the floor. He said that to Amelia.

And this is what Joe and I got. We all know Joe Saunders. I got one large spicy tuna poke bowl wise. Wow. I got that with bamboo rice, half bamboo rice, half forbidden rice. Yes. I meant to mention I got the forbidden rice as well, which I really like. I like the forbidden rice.

Love it. Love to say it too. Yeah. Forbidden rice. Do that forbidden rice. Well, naughty. That kind of, what? Feels like something to be in the fucking Pump House game.

Yeah. Her tits were swinging over the forbidden rice. Onion's like, this is great. I think everyone should read this for generations. That came with half bamboo rice, half forbidden rice, yellow, yellow fin tuna, creamy togarashi, crispy onions, cucumber, edamame. How do you say this? Hijiki?

I don't know. I can see it. I tried it, probably did a bad job with that. I also added red onion and I added crispy garlic. Sounds good. And then it also had avocado. You know what? I kind of try to go with my favorite bowls with all these places.

I try a couple different things on one that I get all the time. I'll get to it when we get there. But this is like, my go-to bowl is this spicy tuna bowl. And it was really good. It was really good. It's a good bowl. Do you like spicy tuna? You like spicy tuna sushi?

I don't. I don't really like spicy. I'm not a heat seeker. I will allow spice every so often. And I often am like, oh, it's actually not that crazy. I think I've built it up in my head as like, I don't do spicy things. And it's not really that crazy when I have experienced it, but I feel that I don't want it.

Yeah. I love spice. Ooh, baby, I love me some spice. Yeah, I am something of a heat seeker. I do like spicy a lot. Do you go like super spicy though? Or where do you go like out of 10? Out of 10, probably like six or seven.

Yeah. I think that's where I've kind of settled. I like maybe seven, eight. Is anything else is like painful. Right. And I don't want to get that intense. Just going wild for the heat seeker line, just like, you know. Okay, great.

That's what I want to fucking just cover it in flop sweat. Finally get out one of my catchphrases. People like that. I think what the ingredient you were saying is a hijiki, bitch. A jeeky. Hijiki. What did I say? I think you said it basically right.

You basically said it right. Yeah, I just looked at it. I had to see it to see how it was supposed to be. I think how it's supposed to be said. Yeah, I love spicy. Natalie, I love the wife. She goes like fucking 10, 10 plus. Really?

She loves it super spicy and that's a lot. It's too much for me. It's very alpha. And Sweepin, Sweepin I think was, look, I feel like Sweepin's been hitting all month long. I've been really, I kind of have a little bit of favoritism towards it at this point, especially because I was not expecting it to satisfy the veggie side so well.

And I feel like if you are averse, I do, I look, I love sushi, but I have a little bit of an aversion to poke, just like the big, I've talked about this at length on the podcast, but just like that big pile of like raw salmon sitting in like a tray that would serve frozen yogurt feels a little unappealing to me. That has never really bothered me until I heard you guys talking about that and Arden said that too. And I was like, oh, okay, maybe that's a little weird,

but it didn't really, like the times that I've been in places that have that, it doesn't like lemonade does that. I don't really think about it too much, but I can. And it's probably fine. I don't care about that. Hygienic, but. Last time we got it, Amelia put it in the fridge. I was like, don't put mine in the fridge next time.

Like I didn't care about it at all. Let it grow something. Let it cook a little bit on the table. I was fine with that. It doesn't bother me for whatever reason. Yeah. I think that's fair. And honestly, that's my thing.

That's not, that's not the chain's issue. That's my, that's my issue. So, but, but I have been impressed by Sweet Fin's offerings. Let's pivot to Chipotle. Lapkus, you were, why don't you lead things off your tail, sharing your Chipotle thoughts earlier? Let me see what I got. So I've only had Chipotle one time, which I know sounds insane.

And is. It's really wild. But I just don't go there. And so I was a little bit, I like tacos, but I was kind of like, oh, a bowl? I don't know if this is going to be my thing. Because, and I, and it ultimately wasn't. Because it was very sloppy, doppy, dew.

And it was gloppy glue. And I was sort of like, I don't think I like how this is. So I ate the tacos. But I, so. Gloppy, doppy, dew. We were like, okay. Yeah. That's a gloppy.

Gloppy, gloppy, doop. Yeah. That's, that's, that's. Gloppy's bad. So I got, but here's the complaint though. And when I listened to your episode with Paul Scheer, and he was talking about customizing his bowl. And this was the thing.

I got it from Postmates and I was not able to customize. So they didn't have any options to like select all the things you want. And so I got the one that I thought would be the most of the ingredients I would eat, which was the veggie full bowl, whatever that is. It was, the ingredients were good. It was just too much glop. I was sort of like, I can't eat all this. Like it was this big thing.

And I was just like, how am I going to eat all this? So I did order tacos on the side to please myself and I ate those. And then I used some chips and I got kind of in there with the bowl. And I kind of got into it, but I got chips and guac as well. It was just too many layers of different things for me. I would have liked, I sort of liked things a little drier. That's my own problem. I also got my daughter, the kid's quesadilla with,

it comes with white rice and black beans and some chips, which came in a really cute little bag and a little apple juice. And she didn't want a single bite. She was like, not this mama, but that's just down to happen with every meal I make her and give her now. So it's, you know, she's two almost. You don't drink apple juice as adults. Natalie drinks apple juice.

I do like apple juice. I will have it as a treat every now and again. Martinelli's apple juice is a lot of fun. And a glass, we were just talking about glass. It's a little glass bottle and it's kind of squat. Yeah, a little squat glass. Too much plastic. We're pro glass, we're anti plastic,

both for environmental reasons, but also for flavor reasons. It just tastes better in a glass. My Chipotle order, I went in person because you can't customize and I got really angry. I should have gone in person. I really, I didn't understand that I could have gotten really detailed. Yeah, you could have done whatever you want. You could have said more chicken, less chicken, whatever.

I would have really enjoyed that, I think, because I could make it exactly how I want, yeah. I love it. So I got lettuce, double chicken, the mild salsa, yeah, the mild salsa, and then the hot one. And then a little bit of... The tomatoes and then the red salsa. Because I like the loose tomatoes.

Yeah, that'd be good to go. Mm-hmm. And then... I like the tomatoes too, but then when you said loose tomatoes, I was like, I don't know if that doesn't... Oh, it doesn't hold together like the way the other salsa does. And then a little sour cream and then guacamole and a nice extra. And then that's for me.

Now, you said this off the dome for our audio listeners. Yeah, you were not reading off of anything. Is this your regular order? Yes, and I was remembering going down the line what I asked for. No beans. Wow. I hate beans. I don't like beans either.

I'm not a bean now. And the beans were a big part of my bowl. And I was like, I tried to go like, let's just eat the beans, you loser. And I was like trying, you know, I was like... You don't have to beat yourself up and call yourself a loser to eat the beans. I feel like everyone likes beans, and so I felt like I should not be a bean. Well, the dough boys love beans.

I love ores. We love fucking beans. I love beans, and I'm not a bean head. I like that you don't like beans. It's okay not to like beans. Yeah. Not for me. Legumes?

Not for me? Yeah. Wow. Leave those legumes. We got a question. Oh, no, you're spending too much time with the dough boys. Here's a question. You may not like beans.

How about Mr. Bean? By God, Mr. Bean is so funny. But if you... Mr. Bean is very funny. So why are you and I recently... We can't go on this tangent too much. Come on, just a little bit. We'll mention it, but we can't spend too much time on it.

What if we did all Mr. Bean movies on newcomers? That's a great idea. I've never seen any. I haven't seen any. That's a great idea. That's a great idea. That's a nice funny to look at. That's a great idea.

All right, how many Mr. Bean movies are there? I 100, I don't fucking know. I'm surprised you've never seen him. You know, I keep my entertainment to not Mr. Bean. I couldn't think of a single British television show. We were in here. We were doing the 24-hour stream for Head Gum, and Jeff was trapped here doing the show.

He didn't know. They popped it out. And then we talked about... Miss Her Jeff, the host. And I thought he said, Super Bean is... Mighty Bean. Sorry. Mighty Bean.

Hearing it again makes me laugh. It's very... Mighty Bean. And I was like, is that like Mr. Bean is a superhero? Yes. And then Weigher and I laughed for 10 minutes, right? Thinking of like Weigher and I were like,

and then flying around. And Jeffrey was like as much as possible trying to move the show along. And then we just kept pitching on Mighty Bean and laughing at it. That's awesome. Yeah. Once you see him,

he's the guy who gets a turkey stuck on his head at one point. Yeah. He's very funny. His first friend's got it. I think they did. I think they might have built for him. Maybe. I think that is Mr. Bean.

I think they ripped Mr. Bean. That's all right. Anyways, Mighty Bean is good. Here's what I'll say about Mighty Bean is really good. Here's what I'll say about Chipotle. I do like beans. As far as customizing it and ordering it out of store, the app is not crap.

The Chipotle app lets you do all of that. You know what? Chipotle app is fucking great. Sweet Queen's got a great app too, though. All three of these have great apps. I never want to download another app. Yeah. I understand that.

And I have too many food apps, food ordering apps, especially for individual places. Do you save money? Yeah, you'll save money over time, yeah. Do they have like an in-house delivery person who delivers via the app, or is it still like a third-party person? I think it's third-party for Chipotle,

but I don't get delivery often, so I'm not sure. Or you do pickup. Yeah, I'm a pickup guy. But I will say this. I got the Chipotle app in the Find My Bathroom app, which now I know is just Home Depot and Tinder. And that's it? Napping, crapping.

Oh, wait, wait a minute. That doesn't work. One of them's not eating. But you don't have... Your phone doesn't have email, text. It just has those... Yeah, just... I don't know.

I hope my phone... All the apps are shaking, and I exed out the email and the phone. And they're fucking booze, dude. The bottom row is... The bottom row, the home screen. The bottom row is Chipotle is the first one on the home screen. And then Tinder.

And then Find My Toilet. You post your screenshot of your phone and what apps do you have. Just a blank. I mean, everything else is just blank. Yeah, yeah, it's just blank. Mine's... My phone's pretty organized.

Here's what I'll say. I got a veggie bowl. What do you mean by organized? Do you put them in the... Mine is so not organized. The apps are all mixed up. He's got no apps. They're on the correct order.

Yeah, I did streamline which apps I have in there. Do you put them in that thing where there's 100 in the thing? Yeah, I'll do the folders. I don't know how to... How do you say that? You just... The folder?

Yeah, I'll do the folders. Yeah, but I know... I don't remember when stuff's in a folder and then it all gets lost. My phone's in mess. Show us your apps. Mine's in mess. Show us your apps.

It looks... Look, I don't think it's particularly impressive. I think it's just... Hold on, let me unlock my phone. I just have so many apps. And I have so many that are in the cloud. My... Yeah, here we go.

So this is my basic screen. So I've just got... Everything wrote up. Honestly, that's really organized. And then you flip and then I've got... So I've got my little category for... It looks really good. Mine's chaos.

Banking, gaming, streaming. Here's one for planes and trains. That's fun. Oh, that's nice. Yeah. Or another one for ridesharing cars. I have an app called... You.

I think it's called TOCA. TOCA TOCA. And it's just you cut people's hair. Oh, I love that. It's a fun little app. It's like a game. It's like a game. It's a game, yeah, where you just...

You cut people's hair and then you make their hair grow. It sounds good. Oh, that sounds really fun. I love that. Do you see those ads, the ads on Instagram where it's like, give the lady a makeover. Oh, my God. She's like, oh, I love them.

Yes. I like, has a baby. And she's like a pile of dirt and dust. Yeah. And then you like, make her beautiful. She's like, have you played that? She's kind of like, her husband who's cheating on her. And then she's like, I'm having a bad day.

Yeah. And it's like, such a nightmare. Have you played it? I have not played it, but the ads are always... The lady comes in and like, farts in front of her husband and he's like, I'm done with this. And he walks out with another lady.

And then they're like, give her a makeover. And then they always... And her hair is horrible. She's like, pregnant. It's supposed to be a game. And then it's always like, her hair. And it's like, should you wash it or buzz it? And then the computer always picks buzz it.

They always pick the most horrible things that they make her worse. Yeah. And then she puts on a smelly clown suit. Right. It's insane. It is a wild game. They never tell you what it is.

Like, I don't know. You play the game? No, I'm saying it's from what you're saying and what I've seen. It seems wild. I wonder, because everything's so algorithmic that it must lead to more engagement at being repulsive and confusing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, people are like, what the fuck is this thing? What is this pregnant woman who's farting? I know, but that's so fucked up we are. Yeah. Yeah. That you're just drawn to it. But yeah, I've seen those, the shitty mobile game ads.

It's a whole subreddit for it. They're fascinating. Anyway, it's good stuff. It's endlessly entertaining. I haven't played very many of them. You could be on a network sitcom and make less than if you made one of those fucking shitty mobile. Anyways.

Anyway. I got a veggie bowl. The Chipotle app. Yeah, Chipotle app is great. I got a veggie bowl. I got the guacamole. I get my guacamole on the side, so it doesn't get like-

Love the guacamole. Yeah, they do have good guac there and it doesn't mash in with the hot ingredients. I got the fresh tomato salsa, the loose tomatoes like you were talking about, the tomatillo red chili salsa, fajita veggies cheese, queso blanco, which I had to make an extra cheesy, another hot ingredient, white rice and pinto beans.

This is close to what I normally get as like my go-to bowl. If I'm not having an animal protein, it was hitting. I'm just fucking good. I mean, Chipotle's solid and Chipotle maybe has the least amount of standard deviation of any of these. It's perhaps the most consistent.

Now, whether you like Chipotle or not, that's up to your palate, but it was hitting for me. I like that veggie bowl and I particularly like the guacamole on this outing. Mitch, how about yours? I love their guacamole. Great guacamole. It was really good.

Wags, I ate my Chipotle bowl moments before the show started. Nice. Which was now three hours ago. The show's only really been on for an hour and 20, 30 minutes. But we got it. Also, shout out to everyone who worked on the show. Emma and...

Yeah, Emma, Amelia, Mike, Casey and Anya here in studio. Everyone moved heaven and earth. Bart over at moment.co. Everyone was doing everything they could to get this up and going. So God bless you all. For this bullshit, sorry. Yeah, sorry.

It's really high quality. This is nice. Sorry. Yeah, sorry. Three cameras. It is nice. It's 11 p.m. on the east coast. Jesus Christ.

I didn't even think about that. There's people on the east coast with jobs watching this shit. Yeah. They have sleeping caps on. They have sleeping caps. Yeah, I was saying they're in bed. I was trying to say they're in bed.

They go in these people on the east coast. We're in sleeping caps watching this. That's a normal thing. They're matching pajamas. They get a little candle on a plate. Watching dough boys. Yeah. Sleeping cap reminds me of bananas and pajamas.

I think they wore sleeping caps when they came downstairs. They did. They did wear sleeping caps when they came down the stairs. That's an all-coast. I don't know why bananas and pajamas would be an east coast only thing. I think that is all-coasts, right? I think so.

Okay, yeah. But yeah, it's a very... I think it is a kind of a New England-y thing, is pajamas. Did you know the teletubbies baby, the baby and the son on teletubbies now has a baby? That much time has passed. Isn't that wild? Oh, come on.

That makes sense. Break your brain. It's very old. Yeah, that sucks. God, that's crazy. Fucking insane. Another thing that's wild is people born in 2000 or 23 next. Yeah, that sucks.

That's also really weird. That sucks. I feel so old. We're really old. Thank God. You can watch a porno with someone who was not born after 9-11. Okay, that's so fucked up. I'm not saying you could do that and it's illegal.

That's... I would love to see what that subsection of porn is like. I was born after 9-11. I don't even know what it was. I don't know what the two towers are. How could you forget if you never knew? Do you want to take your freedom tower and put it in my pussy? Dear God.

Dear Lord, why did that come to you first? We're talking about age. We're talking about how much time is passed. His fault. It is my fault. Are you a pajamas guy? I go boxers and a t-shirt. I've gone into pajamas lately.

I love pajamas. I fucking love them. I love a set. Right. They're nice. I just ordered a new set. Rolled Navy. But...

Tretches. I know. I almost ordered them from a fancy place and I went, I bet I could find this for $16 or something. Yeah, spending money on sleep clothes feels perverse, but I got a bunch of stuff at Target recently and it was all pretty cheap and it was great. I have a designer set.

It's Rachel Antonoff and it's got little chickens on it. Okay, those often go for a lot of money on posh mark and stuff. The pajama sets, or people are seeking them all the time and they're like, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm keeping mine. I can't sleep in the buff.

I can't do that. I can't. Okay, that's disgusting. Yeah, it feels... I don't... It's fucking... No, and then also, what if something happens the middle of the night

and you're like... Nourring! What is happening in the middle of the night with that magical wall? And you have to run around and you're like, I'm hanging. And there's like a guy in, I don't know. In your house.

It's your husband. Oh, okay, then it's fine. And then you have sex. All right, this is working out pretty good. Lordy naked. I can sleep in the buff, but when you disclose it, it makes you sound like a weird swinger.

Like, I'm not like a sex guy, but I can do that. Oh, sorry. It is comfortable, you know? Mr. Post 9-11. All right, here's my order from Chipotle. Accidentally just opened Twitter. Okay, here it is.

Accidently. God, thank God. You're tweeting Amelia. Where's the pizza? Yeah. Thank God we're not doing categories. Jesus Christ. It would be like another 30 minutes of show after this.

My bowlwigs for the meat. Yeah. I want half chicken al pastor, half steak. Two that I haven't. That's not chicken al pastor. Chicken al pastor, pretty good. I like it a lot. But you know what?

It was tempted to try it. And I like the original. It's not classic. I like the original chicken better. Natalie didn't like her al pastor, chicken al pastor. She's like the original is better. It's too sweet.

The original is better. It's the original is better, but it's not bad. Pinto beans, brown rice. I'm eating fibrous things now. Okay. Why isn't our doing a weight loss app? It's the Chipotle app. It's the Chipotle app.

It's the Chipotle app. Yeah. It's the weight less app. Like you don't wait as long. You go get your food. Yeah, my Chipotle came very fast. Almost too fast. Fresh tomato salsa, roasted chili corn salsa.

Almost as fast as your outfit. Green chili salsa as well. Sour cream and cheese. And then I just swiped again. And it was the pizza order from Amelia. Should I read that off? Is it coming? Large New York style cheese.

One large butcher. Is it here? And one large Blanco veg. So that's all the pizza is here. Wow. Mom, don't touch it till we come out. All right. And that is...

Your mom can have some pizza. No, she's not until the show's over. Give her some pizza and some wine. The performers eat first. Jesus Christ. She performed. She got out of here. She performed.

Yes, she came out just now. Damn it. All right, you can have a slice, mom. Anyways, I enjoyed it quite a bit. But I like the slop. Even the glop, I'm fine with the glop. You gotta be down with the glop. Gotta be.

And I do think that this is like, look, it's the closest you get. So much joy in life kind of vanishes as time goes on. This sounds like one of my quotes. I was gonna say. You can't be eating burritos all the time. And I'm like, if I eat a burrito bowl, I'm having fun.

Yeah, live your life. It's a little bit of fun. It's true. Totally. And it tastes just fine. I will say this that I do think Chipotle gives me the rumblies why. 100%.

It's part of the rumblies read. So get on the camera. Everyone makes fun of Taco Bell is the place that will give you the like, I ate it and I got the runs or whatever. But I'm like, Chipotle makes me feel way worse in that category. I still like it despite that.

Anyways, it was decent. I ate it right before this. I didn't finish it, but I had quite a bit. And also I had some tortilla chips and queso and green salsa, which are on the table for any performers to eat. Let's talk about sweet green, which got into the tournament,

made this into a triple threat match via Fat Chats Kitchen Presents, Bread Dead Redemption. Here's what I got from sweet green. I got the super green goddess salad. Mitch, this was my pre-show. That's what I got. You got the same thing.

Okay, so we'll talk about this. Wow, taste buds. Green goddess ranch, we are taste buds. Baby spinach, shredded kale, raw carrots, chickpeas, raw beet, a lot of raw ingredients. Shredded cabbage, roasted sweet potato, spicy broccoli, roasted tofu, lentils, toasted almonds. I also added tofu to have a little bit of extra protein in this.

Here's my issue. I got an extra side addressing for this just to try to like, you know, because I knew it had a lot of cruciferous components. What's that? Like a tree-like. Yeah, what was that word you said? Cruciferous?

Yeah, cruciferous. Like, yeah, like tree-like. Like a tree-like. Yeah, like broccoli. Yeah. Tree-like. Well, let me mix it up with coniferous. Coniferous?

Which is like a type of tree. Maybe that means tree-like. It's not like a cross between lettuce and Lucifer to me. I'd love to know what the word means. I'll look it up. Yeah, let's look up cruciferous. You're looking it up? I'll look it up.

It sounds scary. Doesn't it? Yeah, crucifix. Yeah, crucifix. Vegetables of the broccoli family. So cauliflower, cable, kale, bok choy, broccoli, Brussels sprouts. I still feel like tree-like kind of works.

Tree-like kind of works. Hold on a second. Can I just say something? Why did you say it? Why did you say that? Well, you shouldn't have said it. You should have said something else. You shouldn't have said it because it's too smart.

I guess at some level I like... You don't want big words? Just don't say it. You should have said I had all the big words. Mitch is right. It's the... It's elitist. It is an elitist thing.

It is a tendency. It's like I want to show off my vocabulary because ultimately I'm insecure about being a guy who masquerades as an intellectual but doesn't actually have a college degree. So that's all coming out in terms of me choosing words like some nambulant. You don't have a college degree?

No. I thought you did. See, that's the thing. I'm a fucking fraud. No. I think we just make assumptions. I think you should go back to school. I don't have a college degree.

We should go back to school. Tomorrow. Okay. All right. I did bad in school. Do you have a college degree? I didn't do great in school. I have a degree.

I didn't want to brag and make you guys look like chump. Mitch has a fucking degree. I do have a degree from college. If you saw the two of us and you're like, hey, one of these guys is college educated. You should go back to school. Fucking clown college. Wow.

Wow. He's fucking burned your ass. Have to recover. Well, I'll go to clown college too. Honk, honk. Oh, good. I would love to watch that reality show. That sounds good.

Man, Nicole in clown college would be so funny. That would be such a funny show. You know, have you ever heard about these clown schools? Like, who was talking? I think June, Diane, Raphael was talking about this, where they went to a clown school or a clown class in college where you are not, you have to make everyone laugh authentically to pass.

Oh, my God. Like, everyone has to, you can come in a room, you can't speak, and you have to make everyone laugh. And it's like, what happens if it goes like 15 minutes? It goes on and on and on and on until the teacher laughs. Fuck, crazy. Oh, my God. That's awful.

I love that. Isn't that psychotic? Doe boys would fail that test. Oh, my God. It would be so fun to make each other do that and watch. You love torturing, friends. Well, you're so fun to do that. I think it would happen so fast.

I think it would happen fast, too. Here's the thing. I knew this had a lot of different vegetable components, and so I was worried this would be a dry guy. And you know what kind of refreshing to hear you say all that other stuff, honestly. I liked it. Like, you're trying to make it look smart,

you don't have a college degree. I liked all that stuff. Oh, you loved that. Yeah, I loved it. Yeah, prime back ground to Earth. Well, see, when I get that delivered, because I often will order this salad. I was joking.

I didn't really like it. I felt sad after he said it. Why did you feel sad? Because I don't know, he shouldn't feel bad about that. Who gives a shit? No one's thinking. No one cares. It doesn't matter at all.

Yeah. I think that if I went to Clon College, like, it would annoy me. I'd go out there and like the professor would laugh. I'd be like, I didn't know what the fuck. That's exactly what would happen. You would truly walk in the classroom and the instructor would laugh uproariously,

and everyone would be like, dang, that's just so funny. And I'd be fucking fuming. I'd be like, what did I do? You'd be a pro clown really fast. I often get this salad delivered and they only put one dressing. And then halfway through, I'm like, it's so dry. It's so dry.

It's a drag. You got to up your dressing. I got two. I needed three. Oh, wow. This was overwhelming in terms of the amount of chewing that I had to do and just the dryness of the gumball. Well, I went to the restaurant for this one.

And they had, you can choose how much dressing. So I said medium, which actually was enough once they toss it for you. Yeah, that's huge. That was a good amount. But usually, I was like, this is so much better when they make it. It's so, when they make it and they stir it in that big bowl

and they toss the dressing for you, it's so much better. It's so much better. And also, a little cup must be nothing. Not enough. I think the cup is not a full serve. I don't even think it's a light. I don't even think they give me a squirt. You know, when you go in there, I always think,

I always want to ask them, do you ever want to laugh? But I don't, it's like, you go and it's so, it's so queefy. That's really funny. I would just love to be behind you in line. And you're like, hey, you ever laugh at that queef? I usually just don't say have the things, or things like that. I'm like, oh, fuck out of here, you brat.

As you have a laugh, you have this queefing bottle. I want to slide into that bowl when they got all that dressing in there. I love it. Just slide it in there. Just fucking squint. I got to go in person. You want to be like a little like honey,

I shrunk the kid and make whee. I mean, it would be fun. In person is good because you can see all the things. Yeah, it's like Chipotle. Yeah. Where's the gad honey, I shrunk the kid. Wasn't there a gad honey? It was in development forever.

What happened? It actually happened. Never came out. I want to be in that. Gad? I'll be so far with Josh Gad. Josh Gad. Oh.

Have you ever seen pixels? Why did everyone know that Gad meant Josh Gad? I haven't heard of it. I haven't heard of it. It's a short hand for Gad. It's short hand for Gad. We're all just talking about Josh Gad all the time. Short hand for Gad.

Short hand for Gad. Short hand for Gad. Obviously. Here's what I'll say about pixels. There's another thing we've talked about in the podcast. But in pixels, it's a joke at the end that Gad fucks Kuber. Yeah, Gad is fucks Kuber. Pixels is what?

Pixels is like video game characters come to life via aliens. Oh, OK. Aliens have observed our video games and have figured out that that's how we, to weaponize them, they can use that to conquer Earth. So they send down classic video games that they could get the rights to. One of them is Kuber, who's a little orange guy

who hops on different cubes. And he has a big nose that he speaks gibberish out of. And then Gad fucks him in the movie. And if Gad fucks him, he transforms into some babe. But it's Kuber. But it's Kuber. And then they have half Gad babies. Yeah.

And when they fuck, this is the children's movie? This is the children's movie. It's an Adam Sandler movie for kids. So it's kind of like a raunchy kid's movie. When they fuck, is Kuber's face the whole? I think so, yes. That one would infer. I was hoping one of you would fill in the blank

before I had to say it. Yes, sorry. And also, it is something that I think that we've talked for like three hours above before. I think it is just one main hole. I think it is just one main hole. It's one orifice that does it all. All right.

But Gad fucks that, I guess. OK, great. This was Sweet Green's weakest outing of the tournament for me. What did you think, Lapkus? Mine was actually really good because they made it. And I really enjoyed it. I traded out Spicy Broccoli.

I added avocado. They said $2 more for half an avocado. Now, that's a lot. And I was going, yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever. And then I was thinking, I have avocados at home. I could have just put that in there. But I liked when they made it all for me. And I thought, I'm playing the game.

I want to see how they do it. It was delicious. I really enjoyed it. Wow. That's my review. Fire your bowl. I created my own. Wow.

I never do that because it feels like I'm going to make a horrible thing. It's stressful. Oh, well, I just know what I like. That's good. So I got chopped romaine, warm quinoa, cucumbers, tomato, avocado, two servings of blackened chicken, parmesan crisp, and shaved parmesan.

No dressing, because I used my own dressing. Wow. Wow. B-Y-O-D. I don't trust restaurant dressing. Really? Why? Because it's never as good as my dressing that I buy at home.

I don't know if you're going to say it's going to have salmonella. Oh, no, no. I just, I'm really gross. I really love craft ranch dressing. So that's what I put on it. Good dressing. It's yummy to me. Follow the grain.

This was a yummy meal, and I like it. I order it all the time, just on my own. Adding your own dressing might be the way to go. Yeah, that's a good move. Is that honestly just like, opt it so much? If I get it delivered and I throw on my own share. Throw on your own stuff. It's real nice.

I do wish they had bacon. They don't have bacon. They don't have any red meat there. Yeah. Oh. I'll try that. Wait, isn't it the other white meat? Wasn't there a whole campaign about big pork?

Yeah, I think that was probably the pork probably down there. It's still considered red meat. Yeah. I'll try that Olivia Wilde dressing, that salad dressing. The one she made for Harry Styles. Olivia Wilde's salad dressing? Yeah, it was kind of like a huge thing in her divorce. She made this dressing that apparently is so good that gets people's big heart.

Really? Again, fill in the blank for me, you guys. Wait, that's wild. No, Harry Styles, she made this dressing and it was in a Tupperware, and then everyone was going gaga for this fucking recipe, and she posted it. Oh, you're bringing over some of that dressing you got, right? He's bird-ish. Yeah, he's been our second.

It's supposed to be really good. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, look it up. I know. I can make someone come on me. Dear God. I think that would work for you. Thank you.

That would be nice. I think if you were like, I made this dressing. Now let's go. Okay. All right. I'm holding back right now. This is because my mom's in the other room. I'm not afraid of my mom.

I'm not afraid of her. I just don't want to, you know, discuss it with my potty mouth. That's fair. She's fine. She's her son is me. Her son is me. Wigs, when I started this tournament, I didn't like sweet green. Wow.

Whoa. And now? Can we go to Fercava? I'm a fan of sweet green. I've come. Holy shit. Around completely. And it's like, to me, it's like, it might win today.

I don't know. We'll see what happens. It might. We're going to find out. I got the harvest bowl. I usually get that too. I love that one. I like the harvest bowl.

I got rid of kale because kale hurts my tummy. And it's so hard. And so I got chopped romaine instead. I doubled up on the apples. So I got more apples. I got shaved parmesan instead of goat cheese. And then I got three dressings as well. Wigs, I got three of the balsamics, which were almost as

much as as many calories as the salad itself. It was very close. That's where they get you. My mom got the fish taco salad. And she got romaine instead of arugula. And then she removed the warm quinoa. And I try to, I try to bite her salad. Very good.

We also got the rosemary focaccia wigs because this is. Oh, is that good? It's so fucking good. It's fucking good. It's fucking good. Oh, I'm always, like, on the mat it, whether I ordered or not. It's great. It's really tasty.

It's really good. Here's the thing. It's great, Anya. It's great. I was looking at some food. It's good. It's good. Wow.

They feed it to bears outside a Russian restaurant. Well, they stay with the red balls. Those things are gauging. It's fucking delicious. It's good. But here's the thing. It's a treat that you don't need when you're trying to eat healthy. And that's the argument against the focaccia.

Sure. It's one and a half. Give it a half to the bear. It's one and a half. It's one and a fucking thirds. Yeah. Five, one and thirds. That's great.

It's a tasty treat if you've split it into thirds. Split it into fours if you want. Five, that's a square. Now I don't square it. Just have one bite. Have one bite. Just have one little nibble. Yeah.

And more eat the rosemary and be done. There you go. Just pull out the rosemary. Just smell it. You didn't even put it in your mouth. Pull out that rosemary, eat the rosemary. That's what we've come to a conclusion on. I got that.

And I also got the hibiscus iced tea. They're the hibiscus clover tea. They do have some good, like, you know, fucking drinks there. I'll be honest with you. I didn't take a sip of it. What's up with that? I was just fucking in show mode, dude.

I was like, no time for this. I got to get to the fuck. I got to get to the main courses. And so I'll have that in another day. Great iced tea. But great outing for me. I really liked it. I think that the app is great.

Great app. This is close. This is close. This is very close. This is close. Here's what we're going to do. We are going to get to our finalists in just one second. Holy shit.

First order of business. We, Mitch, when we have a triple threat match, this is how we've done it in tournaments past. We eliminate one and then cut it down to two. So let's do it this way. We're going to count down from three to one. We're going to say in unison, which of these chains, Chipotle, sweetfin, or sweetgreen, we think should go.

Which was the worst? Which gets the bronze. This is going to be crazy. There's four of us. There are four of us. It possibly could be tied if it's two to two. But in most outcomes, there will be a winner. So we're going to find that.

I'm judging the bowl. We're judging the bowl. What do we think of the bowl? I mean, Brett also counts. Brett, about Brett, there's more than they can be said. And then chips are also bread. And I also want to say that Gru is a character I don't know much about, but I look forward to learning more.

Here's what's great about the Despicable Me franchise. It's adorable. He's very, like he's cute when he's a kid. He's funny when he's grumpy and old. There are two Gru timelines that exist in parallel. So we've got like the Despicable Me is like cranky Gru. It's kind of like everything everywhere all at once. 100%.

Yeah. Every Gru everywhere all at once. What? Excuse me, I'm gonna get re-hired at funnier die in real quick. They unbored the windows. They're like, we chose die. And the great thing about Gru is when you watch him fucking,

you're like, oh, he knows, he's experienced 9-11. He knows what happened. 100%. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We're gonna count down from three to one and say, is it Chipotle? Is it sweet fin? Is it sweet green?

Which was our least favorite during this outing? We're gonna say it together. We're gonna say it all together. Okay, here we go. Here we go. Three, two, one, sweet green. Wait, what did you say? Sweet fin.

Sweet fin, sweet fin, chipotle, sweet green. So we had three different answers here, but that eliminated sweet fin. Sweet fin's out of here. Wow. Wow. Wow. So it's down to chipotle versus sweet green. Does that feel the healthiest option?

The healthiest option? But that also means that the two of you are going to determine the winner. Whoa. The two of you are going to determine a champion, because it sounds like our votes are set. Right. Wow. Right.

Wow. So think about that, because that's a big obligation on your part. Okay. Before we get to that, Mitch, we have a tradition we do every year here on the tournament of champions. Each year, one entity receives a special commendation, a jury prize, if you will, for their outstanding performance throughout the tournament.

This is the heart of a champion award. Mitch, we're about to crown the heart of a champion. And this year, I'm just going to say some nominees. First up, Casey, who's been with us all month long, has been a real hero of the tournament, working very hard alongside Anya tonight. Casey, you've done a great work for us. It's great to have you on the team, great to have you in studio, and you did a lot of heavy lifting this month, Matt.

Great job. So Casey's one nominee. Another one, hot sauce, plus a lot of these bowls. I feel like we should probably include Anya with Casey. Anya is also, yeah. Or how much shit we can do. I just also included with Casey. We talked about the Pump House gang a lot today.

I think that will include both of you in that award. She just rejected the nomination, yeah. You said plus up. Do you follow this man who makes sandwiches on Instagram? We do. Is this the sandwiches of History guys? Yeah, he pluses them up. Guy fucking rules.

I love him so much. We tried to get him on the podcast. He's going to come on. He's going to come on? We tried to get him on, but he was like, I am a guy. I have a job. And so I can record on weekends when I'm not working at my job.

Oh yeah, that was hard for you guys to understand. Yeah, we're like, that's a job. There's only two jobs. Actors are a writer too. It is hard to be like, to tell my mom, like it's tough out here. It's hard to do stuff. And she comes on.

I'm like, I got a show on Tuesday. That's it. She's like, you just have a show on Tuesday? We go shopping. She's like, you suck. My son sucks. Casey's a nominee. Hot Sauce is a nominee.

Bitch, I'm going to say, I think poke should be a nominee because poke is having a moment in the chain game. And I feel like both poke bar and sweetfin had great outings in this tournament and sweetfin has almost the finish line. Bulls, we did bulls all month. Yeah. We know what didn't get any respect. Lids.

Lids is a great nominee. Great choice. Lids is great nominee. The top of bulls. Yeah, like you get a bull to go. You need that bull under control. I actually think Chipotle's lid is an issue. Oh, the top of bulls.

Chipotle just, yeah. Yeah, it is a bad one. Flat top of an aluminum pan type thing. I'm like, it smushes it down. I want a dome. Not an ideal lid. We got to go in person. Sweetgreen's got a pretty good lid.

I'll just put it in person. Sweetgreen's got a great lid. That's a great nominee. I'm also going to nominate a reference frequently throughout the tournament, Mitch. The whale. Fuck. I feel like the whale absolutely deserves some recognition.

Fuck, Wags. Yeah. Look, Casey, you did a great job. Yeah. But I think the whale needs to take it. You think the whale gets the harder to jump in? I think the whale gets it over Casey and Nadia. I was going to advocate for lids.

I thought your lid's choice was good. I mean, lids is pretty good, too. Lids is pretty good, too. All right, Casey, you're definitely not getting it. Yeah, it's not Casey. But, man, lids are the whale. Yeah. Whale likes gay porno.

Okay. Jack's off to it. He likes meatball subs. He likes a meatball sub. I am. Have you seen this movie? Yeah, we've seen it. Oh, you got to see it.

I got to see it. You got to see the whale. So, wait, he jerks off to a meatball sub. No. Is that what you said? No, but this is not a lie. Within the first 10 minutes of the movie, within the first 30 seconds of the movie, he's jacking off.

It starts with him jacking off to gay porno. And then... And he's like, oh, they were both born after 9-11. Oh. Is he a sperm whale? No, he's not as well. Here's the thing. Damn.

That's really good. That's great. I'm fucking good. That was very good. I didn't think of that. You didn't think of that. Oh, oh, man. Lackus comes in and fucking slays.

Yeah, 15 seconds of the sperm whale. Hearing the reference. Sounds really good. It's a fascinating watch. I don't think a good movie, but it's a fascinating watch. Fascinating watch. But also, great performance. Oh, he jacks off and eats a meatball sub within three minutes.

He jacks off. He's caught by a Christian guy. He makes the Christian guy. Yeah, a Christian guy, like a missionary comes to his door and is like, oh my god, you're jacking off to gay porno. He's like, I'm having a heart attack. Read my daughter's essay. So yes, he also is having a heart attack.

He's having a heart attack from jacking off. Wait, what? He's reading. The Christian guy reads an essay about Moby Dick, the whale, allowed while he's having this heart attack and then he eats a meatball sub. And then a lady comes in with an eatball sub within. This is all within the first 10 minutes of the movie.

Yeah, that's a lot. Yeah, it's a lot. Does he eat the meatball sub? He does eat the meat several meatball subs. Mitch, I'm going to say Lids takes it. Lids takes it. Congratulations, Lids. You have the heart of a chompion.

Lids, congrats. Congrats, Lids. Sorry, maybe next year you'll win. Nice try, Casey. On behalf of Lids, because it's not a human being, maybe Casey can take the award for Lids. Yeah, Casey, do you want to accept the award on behalf of Lids?

Yeah, I'll accept the award on behalf of Lids. Wow. And shout out to the whale. I love all the fellas. Wow. Wow. Very gracious. We're a class act.

Very classic. Yeah, that's a classic. Sounds great. Also, the Pump House gang came in like fourth. They're very close. All right, we're going to crown a chompion in one second while I'm doing this and while we're getting ready to vote. Nicole Lapkus, I want to give you a second.

If there's anything you'd like to plug, you also don't have to. But if there's anything you'd like to plug, feel free. You should listen to my podcast called Freedom. I host that show with Scott Aukerman and Paul F. Tompkins and it's fun. Hell yeah. And then I'm going to be on Digman, that fun show that I'm in. It's fun.

It's fun. Yeah, so listen out for that. And I don't know what the fuck else. Hell yeah. I have a show called Grand Crew, which airs on NBC Fridays at 8.30 and then the next day Saturday. It is on Peacock. Nice.

Hell yeah. And then I have other podcasts. Wow. Very funny. Check it out. You have a lot of podcasts. Too many. What's that?

Both of them. We have an exit interview with Doe Boys now. So we'll watch that one. Yeah. You just want to say. May I have the purple one? Yeah, you can have the purple one. Purple's my favorite color.

Why? I love this. Anya got us clipboards. Shout out to Anya. This is incredible. So we're going to vote. So we're going to write the winner? We're going to write the winner and we're going to deposit it

into the Dave Thomas cup slash bowl. OK. And while we're doing this. Also just write a little piece. Yeah, you don't have to use the whole paper. OK. Honestly, I said like let's, we could just rip up one paper and Anya was like, no, it should be like the whole paper.

OK. Interesting. That's OK. OK. Wags. I'm pretty torn. Like I said, it was funny for me. You know, I did not like sweet green at all.

But once I learned to customize my bowls and they are very much our bowls, it really changed my thoughts. Wow. On the place and I do really, really enjoy it. I'm depositing my vote. My vote has been put into the Dave Thomas cup. Wow.

You used a whole piece of paper. I did too. I was just like, I don't know. I'll take it with me. I ripped off a little piece of paper. People can use it later. I'll take that with me. I'll use that later.

They can use it again. Wow. Reminder to everyone, stick around. Everyone watching, I know how fucking late it is, but stick around. There is a live post-show Q&A, which will happen shortly after. You both can leave. We don't have to stay.

Yes. I have a babysitter. All right. It's time to crown a champion. This year's version of the McKenna conundrum from our very first tournament, which of these burgers is going to the alien, is which of these bowls is going to the dude

to bring Donnie back to life. Yeah, man. That's why we dressed up like this. Yeah, I see, I see. Whose name will forever be etched in the Dave Thomas cup? Which bowl takes control? Let's find out. Oh, God, this is really intense.

We go. I will read the votes one by one. I'm reaching in. Who are these people? Wait. Who are these people? The winner should be one vote for Sweet Green. Wow, one vote Sweet Green.

Wow. Sweet Green has one vote. The next vote. I'm going to take this little scrap of paper at the bottom. I wonder who wrote that one. A vote for Chipotle. That's me. I voted Chipotle.

One vote for Sweet Green. I love it. One vote for Chipotle. I voted for Sweet Green. We already knew that. Wow. Next vote. This is my vote.

Chipotle. And I wrote my number one was Sweet Fin. Wow. Wow. Which means. Oh, my God, Nicole, you're about to bring it down. Nicole, you decide it. Our final vote.

Sweet Green, but I love Chipotle. Wow. What the fuck? It's a tie. It's a tie. It's a tie. It's a tie. Tie for the first time in tournament history.

It is a tie. We have co-champions. Congratulations. To Chipotle and Sweet Green. What the fuck? Honestly. Wow. That's not right though, because maybe.

What I wanted. Just right now, as someone who doesn't eat Chipotle, I went, I kind of want Chipotle. Yes, I totally get that. Nicole Beyer. Lauren Lapkus. Thanks to Commissioner Susser of the Doid. Thanks to Emma Mealy and Mike Casey Anya.

And everyone here at Headcom. Coming to ya. In a tasteful. Good motion. I got a fork low. And when you eat it. You get sloppy. So don't worry.

Cause I'm chomping. I'm a bold man. I'm a bold man. I'm a bold man. I'm a bold man. I could have walked the hard way. Okay. And I'll eat better.

Eatin' everyday. Okay. So build your bowls. And don't you fret. Cause you ain't seen. Nothing yet. Fuck. I'm a bold man.

I'm a bold man. I'm a bold man. I'm a bold man. That's it for much madness 2023. Until next time for the Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell, and Mick Weigart. Happy eatin'. See ya. Bye.

Thank you. Thank you. Thanks for having us. That was a blast. Also that was cool. Lapkiss was giving like thoughtful thoughts on the bowls. And then we sang. Oh man.

No I know. I love it. Thank you. Bye. On the next Doe Boys Double. We're chatting with you. The Freaks. Live.

Kind of. Join us for the final Doe Boys snack pack on Spotify Live. Except it isn't on Spotify and it won't be live. It'll be at Patreon.com slash Doe Boys. That's Patreon.com slash Doe Boys. See ya there you Freaks. That was a hate gun podcast.