Doughboys - Orange Julius with Scott Aukerman

Episode Date: April 27, 2023

Scott Aukerman (Comedy Bang! Bang! The Podcast: The Book) joins the 'boys to discuss Marie Callender's, Liquid Death, and Young Sheldon before a review of Orange Julius. Plus, the debut of a new segment, The Bun Game.Sources for this week's intro: https://groovyhistory.com/1964-worlds-fair-pavilions-queens-new-york/13 https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/56322/20-awesome-things-people-saw-1964-worlds-fair https://www.history.com/news/the-legacy-of-the-1964-worlds-fair-50-years-later https://www.geni.com/people/Julius-Freed/6000000011658745592 https://heated.medium.com/the-real-history-of-orange-julius-813ae83d8551 https://www.orangejulius.com/en-us/about-us/Want more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Want to watch this episode? Check it out on our YouTube channel by going to youtube.com slash doboysmedia. What's up, everybody? It's your boy, The Spoon Man, and I want to talk to you about today's sponsor, Uber Eats. At Uber Eats, we've helped more than 400,000 restaurants across the U.S. reach new, hungry customers and deliver growth quickly through new orders. Uber's global platform can help you grow, reach new people, get valuable sales data, and unlock ways to expand with flexible delivery options. Put your business on Uber Eats. Get access to the Uber Eats platform, including valuable sales data to grow your business.

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It's a small world after all. This dark ride earworm refrain is so widely known, even people who've never set foot in a Disney park are familiar with its infectious lyrical loop. While today you can experience the song and its accompanying aging animatronic children at Disneyland or one of its sister properties, it's a small world actually debuted at the 1964 World's Fair in Queens, New York. Held during the height of the space race and themed as man's achievement on a shrinking globe in an expanding universe. The now retrofuturist but then just futurist exhibition included models of domed cities on distant planets, the first video phones, an IBM created search engine prototype, and of course,

that future staple, jetpacks. And as tourists marveled at Sinclair Oil's Dinoland and waited in line to ride the U.S. Royal Tire's Ferris Wheel, they sipped the official beverage of the 1964 World's Fair, a sickly sweet dairy citrus concoction invented a half century earlier over on the opposite coast. In 1926, Julius Fried opened an orange juice stand in the heart of downtown Los Angeles, but the stand didn't find its hook for several years when his colleague Bill Hamlin pitched mixing OJ with milk and ice to lower its acidity and aid digestion. The novelty of Hamlin's drink, which Fried then named for himself, made the new OJ stand in Angel City Hotspot and in time, a staple of mall food courts. In 1987, the chain was bought and streamlined

by sweet treat rival Dairy Queen, which in turn was later acquired by quote unquote, good billionaire Warren Buffet. And that points to one future reality not showcased at the 1964 World's Fair, the concentration of wealth in a tiny handful of billionaires, loading their bank accounts by collecting rent on businesses whose success they had no hand in shaping. It's a small world, after all. This week on Doughboys, Orange Julius. Welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants. I'm Nick Weiger, along with my co-host, a fast makes me furious, the spoon man, Mike Mitchell. So just like the idea of someone fasting. Yeah, you're enraged by that, by that prospect.

Presumably one he's partaking. That's what I thought. You're having to fast. You're on a fasting diet and now you're furious. All right, I like the idea that the very concept is one. Fucking monks, man. Bullshit. Like I'm mad at people going on hunger strikes and things like that. You're against, you know, hunger. Yeah, yeah. There we go. There's a better way to frame it. Exactly. You want everyone to be fed and satiated. Yeah. Yeah, that's what it is. That's it. That was sent in from Alvar. But me mostly. Yeah. As long as you're first in line. That's courtesy of Alvaro M, who writes, thanks to the laughs, all the best from Panama. Saludos. Oh, wow.

Let me go. Yeah. That's cool. Ro Spoon Man at gmail.com. Don't know much about Panama outside of the song. I don't know much about Panama either. Also, I'm learning from this email that there's an accent over the last A. Oh, really? Panama. I mean, I think I did know that. But I'm going to Costa Rica. You knew there was an accent over the final A in Panama? No. I knew it. Van Halen's song wouldn't work. That's what I'm saying. Panama. It sort of works. Sort of works.

I'm going to Costa Rica. That's right. A week from tomorrow. We'll also be in Central America. You know. You know, around. We're going to see a lot of it. Hold on, I'm pulling out. Costa Rica's beautiful. It's a family trip. It means rich coast. Like the Manson family. Oh, boy. I don't like jokes like that because I actually am not far from one of the Manson murder houses. Oh, really? Mm-hmm. Where you don't like jokes like that? No, I don't. Yes. Really funny ones? Yeah.

Anything funny because you're so close to the Manson family? I'm so. Yeah, I don't. You're like, this is too funny. I'm very close with the Manson family, and I don't like people making light of. Got it. They're good people if you get to know a lot of them. And when you say Manson family, you mean Shirley Manson? Yeah. I'd say Harris Whittle's joke. This is like garbage, but like the band Garbage, which is great.

So this is, I don't know. R.I.P. R.I.P to a real one. A real one. We consciously said before the episode started that we're not going to talk about Harris on top, but here we are, minute five. We were talking about sad things. Yes, yeah. But I don't, not a sad thing. Not a sad thing? Great funny friend. Oh, man. Yeah. I mean, there's a whole section in the book devoted to it. Oh, wow. I don't know if you caught that part.

I didn't see that. I'm telling you here in my corner. So I'm holding up and our guest today will introduce just one second. Oh, look at that. Comedy Bang Bang, the podcast of the book. And I'm not sure if this is reading on camera, but Harris' foam corner is a big part of this lovely hardcover volume. How about that? Yeah. I got Harris' pig in my house. Get a little golden pig. Really? When he came in. Yeah, yeah.

When he came in? When you came into his home, there was a little golden pig. That's sat there on the dresser. I remember this little golden pig. But now it's in your home when you come in. And now it's in my home kind of when you come in. Don't you also have his like Nintendo 3DS? Yes. This is also, so this is when Harris passed away, I went over to his house. I took some stuff early on before anyone knew.

You were an early adopter. I was taking Harris' stuff. No, it was that embarrassing thing where when Harris passed away, I believe you were probably there this day. Kulap was there. I don't know if you... I don't think I was there. A great move to not be there. Honestly. Kulap was there. I mean, that's sincerely. And it was like this funny thing where his mom was kind of trying to get rid of some stuff too.

It's not funny. But she was like, there was like a 3DS. And I was like, I'll take that. It was just clearly... I was like, oh, I'll take a 3DS. And I took a 3DS and it made me feel bad. But the one thing, they were like, does anyone want this pig? There's a pig at the front. And I always, I just remember going into Harris' house always seeing it. So it's in my... Do you think Harris' ghost is in the 3DS where he like pops up in games? Like just in computer graphics? Like...

You would think it would be the pig, but it is. I think it is the 3DS that he haunts. Projected in 3D, which is a technological marvel. But no, it was a horrible... It was bad in many ways. And then also I was like... Free 3DS. But also a free pig. You know, with everything that happened, it kind of balances out.

We can say this because we were friends with him. We can say it because we were truly friends. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But the pig always, it always reminds me of... The funniest, one of the funniest people in the world. Yes. I didn't know that was in there. America. Let's just say America.

I mean, there's a lot of funny people in England. Russell Brand. That's true. A billion people in India. We don't know who it was. I've never... I don't even know if it would translate to us. That's funny to them, though. Yeah. That's the Russell Brand. With a guy like Russell Brand, I like his comedy, but I also like his thoughts, too.

Yes. So that's a big thing for me is... If I think you're funny, that's great. But if I like your thoughts, now we're on board. Now we're working in tandem. Let's get to truth, the real comedy. Mitch, do you have a drop to play? Yes.

Russell Brand did Brand X instead of what's going on. I think she can play it, though. Right? Oh, now Emma's back. Yes, but Mitch Q is the... I don't want to be embarrassed by our guests. I just almost call them our hosts. I'm very commonly the role.

I really graduated almost immediately, five minutes into the show. I'm now a host. Well, let's just say you were telling someone, yeah, I just podcasted with Scott Ackerman. Oh, how was he as a host? I was like, here's the thing. That's a common question. He was guesting.

How was he as a host? Yeah, that's why people are always asking when I go on other podcasts. How was he as a host? Uh, how do you know what a Spoon Nation here is? A little drop. I hear little snatches of podcasts everywhere I go. You know, people driving by and I'll hear, you know, the Doe voice. Okay, so we got that drop.

So let's hear that drop. Wait, do we have that drop? By the way, can we hear that drop? Speaking of drops? Truly, Mike Mitchell. That's Mike Mitchell right there. Now, you and I both know Scott Ackerman. How enraged do you think that would make him on a scale of 9 to 10?

Well, the idea of me probably gets him to a knob. That was in your apartment, wasn't it? That was in your old place. Yeah, the old spot. Palmerston, which I said the name of. I don't say the name of my new place. The old jackshack. Dicky City.

I tell you what, I learned there was a jackshack in the big brother house and that they call it a jackshack. Wait, is that true? Yeah, and like, you know, they have a backyard with like a fake pool and all this and they have like a tiny room that you can go jack off in. Wow, that's, it makes sense. Yeah, because you're there for three months. Right, not jack off?

Yeah, I hear they don't clean it either. You just got to deal with this in there. From every season. Take a black light in there, just blinding. Yeah, it looks like Stay Puff exploded. I don't know, whatever. What'd you bail on that? Yeah, it was good.

It was good. It was all right. I tell you, Russell Brand, so he got Brand X instead of we did that, what's going on, this talk show that I did. I don't remember where I did that. Oh yeah, I remember, yeah, yeah. And they did Brand X and said, but he's now, isn't he like, isn't he a little bit of like, the vaccine like gets you kooky or what?

I don't know about his vaccine politics. I love anti-vaxxers in England or the vaccine gets you kooky. A sport of vaccine. He's a little, yeah. He's got a little right wingy-ish, right? I thought that he'd actually gone leftist. I thought he was kind of like a leftist anti-wealth guy. Well, he's, no, he's, I mean, he like, he just took a picture with Donald Trump Jr.

Oh, then never mind. Okay, so he's swung back the other way. But we all have those. I think he's one of those, you know how there are a lot of like, crunchy granola anti-vaxxers? Sure. I think he's like, it's one of those, it's a circle. And I think he went so left to crunchy anti-granola that now he's on the right again.

That makes sense. That's why like, like, there was a big thing about yoga teachers. A lot of them went QAnon because like the yoga and wellness community is very like, you know, like anti-vaccine natural medicine and that went all the way around towards, you know. Lesson learned, I'm not going to touch granola from here on out. Not a single ounce of granola. Have you ever done granola on this show? You know what?

We've eaten breakfast bowls that have granola sprinkled on top of that. But have we dedicated an episode to granola? I'm not sure. I don't think we have. Is there any chain restaurant that features granola? I don't know if there's a granola focused restaurant. There were certainly, for a time, they were like, hey, here's a cereal bar.

Here's a cold cereal thing. There was a little bit of a trend, but it never really scaled up. Yeah. I can't know. There's nothing that I think like, Jamba and whatever is the only, what was the other one that was in the bowl tournament? Prest. Yeah, some of the juiceries have like, they have bowls,

big bowls with granola on them. So. Big, big bowls. Big bowls. Yeah, these bowls aren't fucking around. I can't tell. Yeah, yeah. The Prest came in third for our tournament for bowl.

I don't know the exact rankings. Hey, dough boys. I made this drop a few years ago and decided to send it in for today's episode. I'll continue to not make a habit of picking my own drops for the show, but this felt like a decent exception. Love, Drop King. Wow, the Drop King back in the game. It was the Drop King himself.

Wow. And he shouldn't have, he shouldn't have done this. He shouldn't have, he shouldn't submit it his own drop. But a good one. Are you calling for deposing the Drop King? No. He heading for the Drop King? Regicide?

Do you want to tell Drop King he can't do drops anymore? I could just imagine sending that text message to Drop King right now and how upset he'd be. Like we're recording on a Friday, it would ruin his weekend. Needlessly. It was a great drop, he said it. He's the best. Great job, Drop King.

Great job, Drop King. I was going to try to say something about a big bowl. I was going to make a joke about your ass. I was going to be like, you know. Well, I mean, Nick Weiger, I've known you a while. You worked with me for a little while. You've always had a big, bowly ass. Okay, a big old, big old ass.

Big old bowl of ass. Yeah. Sometimes you'd walk in the writer's room and we'd be like, man, that's like two scoops of ass. Like, give me a spoon for that fucking ass. Have you, did you think that you had a big, a big dumper before the show? Was it something you've ever thought about?

Or do you think it's- I've always thought that- What show? Where is it canonically established? You have a huge ass. This show? It's been talked about on this show. I think, look, here's the thing.

I think that a lot of guys, and you know, because I've gone through a lot of different phases of body weight. Which speaking of which, we looked at a picture- From fat to fatter. Yeah. Just kidding. No, you were not wrong.

As someone who does it myself. Yes, yeah. I looked at a picture from 2000. When was that 2000? 2017. And it was, and it was like, in 2017, if you went back and asked, I was like, how do you feel about yourself?

Yeah. We would be like, not good. Yeah, I was like, I look like a big fat piece of shit. I look awful. And now, like, I would take like a wish. Yeah. Can I get back to that way? I've determined now, because I constantly look

at current pictures of myself. And I go like, oh, God. And then I look at pictures from just even a year ago. And I go, why can't I look like that anymore? It's like, you will constantly hate the way you look currently and be nostalgic for how you looked a year ago. Yeah.

So just like the way you look right now. Oh, that's great. That's very positive. That is, that is- I like that attitude. Here's the thing that's funny. I've lost about 18 pounds. Congratulations.

You look great. Thank you. And it's- Or- Well, the funny thing is, is like, when you're like, have to tell, you're like, I like, I like right now, the way I am, I've lost 18 pounds. Yes.

And people are like, oh, oh, well, congrats. Like, you know what I mean? But it's, I don't feel good. I don't feel like, like, in that picture, I would have to lose about like 40 more to be where I was in that pic. Right. Yeah.

We'll get there. Going back to my big bull ass. So the thing is, it like, I, even when I was, when I was a lot slimmer, I was never Joe Saunders, but you know, I was like, I was like a slender guy, but I don't have the- Yeah, he's, he's fucking sick and bald. He's, he's, you know, he's a-

He loves cats. Yeah, he loves cats. Yeah, I mean, guy's weird. He's a weird guy. What's going on with him? Anyway, the, he like, I was never that slender, but I was a lot thinner. I was a lot leaner, but I never had the like, flat ass.

You know, some like, like leaner guys have like, that ass that's just like the- Yeah, you were like- Yeah. Yeah. One, I've got a little, I've always had a little shape. I think I've always had a little musculature on my back door, and I think that's just like, you know,

as I get a little fatter, it fattens up a little bit. I've been accused of having no ass by my mom and sister. You kind of do have like, not a big ass for like, a big guy. Yeah. Yeah. I know, it doesn't make sense. And you sometimes wear your pants a little bit lower. So yeah.

So that like emphasizes that you don't have like, a much of an ass. I have short legs, I found out. Is that true? Yeah, do you know how everyone's like, like, I got made fun of for this? Yeah, yeah, because you're, I was- Relatively tall.

I have a tall torso. Yeah, yeah. But I went and got like, measured. I went and got measured. My mother, mother took me to get measured. Uh-huh. And she said- Just the legs, please.

And they're like, you're actually, your legs are actually more like a 30. And then I told, and then everyone made fun of me that my legs were 30s instead of 32s. Yes. Because like, 32 is pretty normal leg size, right? I got 30 inch legs. While they were down there,

where they're like, oh, especially this guy's hog. Get the junior ruler. That was the branded junior ruler for Arnold's movie. How big is his stomach? So in a way, it was a compliment. Yeah. Our guest today hosts Comedy Bang Bang, and now brings you Comedy Bang Bang,

the podcast, The Book, which he's holding up here on a video feed. Scott Ockerman is here. Hi, Scott. Hi, guys. Thank you so much for having me back. Scott, I always a treat to have you, and especially in studio.

I wanted to talk about- We honestly will be real with you. We'd probably ask you more, but we're afraid to ever waste your time. Yeah, I would come back more. I asked you to be on. Oh, yeah. And I mean, but I'm saying we-

Oh, I know. No, we get scared. We get scared. No, I would come back more if you asked me. All right, we'll ask more. Yeah, we're scared. Yeah, please. I mean, we are scared.

And I don't be scared. Okay. Well, it's not just- You're in a position of power over me right now. You're the lead on a show coming up. Wow, that is true. That will- Like the tables have turned here.

I'm nobody now. I'm a piece of shit. Yeah. No, that is not true. You know, it's like in the Godfather verse, you know, you got that comedy Godfather, but you know, you get- The Godfather verse.

Yes. Right, yeah. You got the offer. Godfather one through three. The extended Godfather verse. And it's not just your time, I think. Anyone, I guess anyone we respect's time, we're always afraid of.

Which is most kids. People who are a little bit older than you. Yeah. And, you know, I mean, oftentimes a lot of like, I like lights, camera, Jackson, I think we were- Wait, was he on? LCJ, I don't think I'm blowing up a spot too much when we're saying this.

We tried to get lights back on recently. He kind of like big-dogged us. He's like, I'm really busy with some other stuff. We'll come back on the line. Okay. We'd love to have you lights, so- Lights, camera, Jackson. Did you write the parody of him for Bang Bang,

or was that someone else? I can't remember. I don't think I actually, I don't think I wrote that. I think I worked on it though. Yeah, it was really funny. But then the actor who did it changed it so much. Yes. A lot of the original stuff, which I thought was so funny,

never got in. But it was, I just remember like the, a lot of the stuff that we thought was really funny about it, which was like a movie critic who's nine years old, who doesn't understand adult concepts, who was like, there was a scene in the movie where the main character went into the bathroom and didn't go down to the tiny urinal.

I just didn't understand why someone would act like that. It's not realistic. Yeah, that's fun. Weigar's always had an obsession with this child, since he was a little boy. I'm a fan. Should that be the drop? Can I, can you just say this is,

and as Scott has accomplished a comedy director, like you must encounter this. And this thing I didn't realize until I was directing is an actor can just like not say the thing. They can just be like, hey, I'm just going to say something else. And you're kind of like. You do what you can.

I guess so. You can get some snipers and, and you know. Right. Threaten to, you know, execute them. And but you, yeah, it's America. It's America. They can, freedom of speech, freedom of not speaking, what you want them to speak, you know.

That is, that's a, I feel like you're being very kind, saying I'm in a thing coming up, but I was like, if I ever pulled this everywhere, I was like, I'm going to go out book and not say any of the written words. I feel like I'd be catapulted from set so fast. I actually sometimes think there were two actors in particular, couch guests on the comedy

bang bang TV show who like asked me, I don't have to say that. Like I'd rather change this. And I went, no, you should say it and made them say, and they're like relatively big. I was like, no, you should say it. They went ahead and did it. And to be honest, it's funny.

But, you know, it's one of those things where I, oh gosh, can I tell the story? I don't know. There was an actor in the Between Two Ferns movie who didn't understand a joke. Right. And was like, I just, I don't know why I would say this, you know, and it was a satirical joke about the industry.

And they were saying like, oh, I don't know why, why I would say this, like I wouldn't say this kind of thing. And then I was like trying to sort of explain it, you know, like theoretically, then I walked away and then like 20 minutes later, they came up to me and said, wait, wait, I get it now. It's funny. Yes.

That rolls. Right. Yes, it's a joke. Right. We got it. All right. That reminds me, I think I can tell this story because I think enough time has passed,

but I think you maybe know this too. The Tom Cruise, when they talk to him about Tropic Thunder, Wags, you know the story. Yeah, I don't know the story, how public the story is. Well, you know what? Maybe it's time it became public. I'm going to go for it. Go for it.

I don't know this. But they were like, they were talking about like, you're going to like, you're going to love this movie, Tom. It's like, it's like a satire. It's like, uh... Yeah, it's not just an action comedy. It's not just an action movie. It's also a satire of action, action movies.

And he was like, satire, satire. And then he went up to the wall. This is the story. And he took out a dictionary. And he opened the dictionary and he went to satire. He took his dictionary on the wall. It was in his home office. It's like in his study, yeah.

Yeah, he's just in his study. He went, satire, satire. We got to do this movie. I have heard that. That's great. That's great. I love it. That can become public knowledge.

I think that's fine. Can we give some of these the plebes? We love them. Maybe it's apocryphal. Yeah, who knows if it's actually true or not. Yeah, it might not be true. This is the story's alleged. I worked with Sean Combs once.

Diddy. He diddy. Yeah, that's right. And me and Andy Maxwell at Funny or Die, we worked on this video. We made this video where it was, because he was a huge fan of Downton Abbey. You were saying Waggar's Puffy at the time?

Yes. Yeah, 100%. Mostly my bull ass. So we're doing this video with, and the whole thing is, the whole premise is that we're taking Diddy and putting him in Downton Abbey. It's Downton Diddy and he's basically like,

I was in Downton Abbey. You may not remember my scenes. And so we edited all these shots together where he's saying some line to some other character. I'm reading these lines with him, because we're just shooting him on green screen. This is a Funny or Die sketch? This is a Funny or Die sketch, yeah.

How much did Diddy get paid, and then how much did you get paid, just out of your answer? Let's see. I probably got paid $100, and the Sirach that he left us, which was a lovely gesture. That's pretty good.

I thought he was great. Very funny guy. He didn't have to bring that. Yes, he didn't have to bring that. But anyway, at a certain point, he goes, there's one of the lines that I think maybe I wrote, and he reads it at me, and he goes, yo, man, I don't get this joke.

And it was the same thing. I just had to be like, just say it again, it'll make sense in the edit. Was it also like a joke about him sucking himself off or something? I don't know who the Spoon Man is. What is this? I'm curious, Scott, because we discussed Marie Calendars. Two episodes before, yeah.

One of your prior appearances. We talked about Marie Calendars, and I know that's a spot that you like to go to. I know that I work there. And you work there, and this is a place that I feel like has not done well post-COVID. Like the Marie Calendars near me. I feel like they're all shutting down.

A lot of them are shutting down. A lot of them. The one that I worked at shut down in the middle of the pandemic, I think, because Matt poorly lived right by it, and he would send me pictures of it sometimes. And he was like shutting down. He sent me an article about it.

That's so sad. Yeah, I don't think it's doing well. Yeah, it's a bummer. We've talked about this on the podcast, but it's that sort of thing of like, oh, we're in a world where you kind of have to root for like local chain, like a little bit. I don't know if Marie Calendars is.

No, I know what you mean. It's, Marie Calendars is, it is. It's Nationwide. It is Nationwide, but did it start in California? Yes, and I think it's kind of like a relative little guy, versus some of the other mega chains. But you have to root for the little, like it's like, oh, I have to root for this little guy chain.

But that does make me sad, because we had a great experience when we went with you. Yeah, it was a lot of fun going with you guys. Oh, that's pop. And then also, I mean, it's my parent, my mother loves going there. And so it's like, to know they're shutting down is like, oh, one less place that my mother loves to go to.

So it's like, you know, it's tough. Great salad bar. No good, like, no. There's just something to like crumble or whatever, which we haven't reviewed yet. But like, I feel like it's a. I think actually, Mitch, I think we have reviewed crumble by the time this episode.

I was, I was walking on eggshells wise. I don't know if we had, I don't know the schedule. But you love to schedule. Sorry, let's just release podcast at random. Here's a new Doughboys episode, Wednesday morning at 1 a.m. A part of me thinks that the reason that you've stayed in it this long is like, you do like that side.

I fucking love it. Yeah, I don't shit. I love filling out a spreadsheet. I know. It sucks. I relate, I honestly, we were playing with my family a game where that game where you have to write down answers and then everyone guesses

which family member said would answer. And I was trying to obscure, they were like, what's your greatest work strength? And I was trying to obscure it was me. So club wouldn't win. And I was like scheduling. But I honestly feel like that is one of my strengths is like. Yeah.

And the only way a podcast can kind of keep going is because you're like mapping out a schedule a few months in advance. The hardest part, and I'm sure it's more so for you because you have multiple guests per episode. But like the hardest part is like trying to book people and trying to get people all in the same schedule. Yeah, definitely.

But I did. There is a bit of a thrill of like, you know, I have like a release calendar of movies and TV and just going like, oh, OK, I'm going to save this week for this person because they have a thing coming out. Right. You know, all of that mapping is kind of fun. Yeah.

We do it in a bad way. This may actually be one of the align, but it's usually like, hey, here's this guy. He's got a comedy, like a special. And then it will be like three months after special came out. Yeah. We're bad at that. Koalak's got his new one man show.

Can you get it in? There's no one at you? I would. I'd fucking love that. Noid in the Netherlands, who's over there shooting fucking. He was our Noid. He just put on for our finale. For our finale, he put on a Noid costume

and sang the National Anthem from his home. And it was the funniest thing that's maybe ever happened on the podcast. I think it's the hardest. I've laughed at anything that's happened on the podcast. I want to ask about juices a little bit because we're talking about ostensibly a juicery, but an old school juicery.

Yeah, finally. Do you like like, are you a juice man? Do you like yourself a fancy pants juicery? You ever have like a, you know, any sort of juicing at home? Follow up question. Are you a juiceman? Do you like OJ Simpson, the man? I mean, both of these are great questions.

You know, there was maybe a period where where Jamba Juice was first introduced where it was like, oh wow, you can go to Jamba Juice and eat this instead of a meal? Yeah. And then it's like, oh no, you're going to eat this as well as a meal. Right. But no, I'm not really a juice guy. I don't have a juicer or maybe Cool Up has one

was trying to do it for a while, but I'm not, I'm more of a water guy. Are you just talking like just still water? Yeah, just still. Yeah, as still as I can get it. By the way, do you have a beverage now? I just have these, these things that we're going to make sure it is like, I don't have a regular, but I'm good. But yeah, I just, you know, like any moving water, you know,

from rapids or a raging river. I'm not really interested in, you know, just slow it down water. Just get still. Class zero. Do you know what I'm becoming? I guess you could guess a lot of things. Yeah, there's so many adjectives running through my mind right now. I'm becoming a liquid death guy.

Oh yeah. I really enjoy a liquid death. I like liquid death. I'd like to be sponsored by them. Send me some, please. Me? I'd love to be sponsored by them, too. Get in touch with them.

No, I, yeah, I liked the liquid death. Liquid death is a, it gives you, I just started, just even the plane, not even sparkling, just the plain water. It gives you a mental sort of, it's a trick to make you think that you're like drinking something good. A hundred percent. It's just water. Yeah.

And it is good. I mean, the water is good. Yeah, but I mean. But it's water. Yeah. And, but, but. Hydrogen. Hydrogen.

Oxygen. Oxygen. Sure. There's probably two of one of them. Okay, I get it. Of the hydrogen. Oh, two of hydrogen. I've been making this wrong.

Oh, you've been doing H02. Yeah. Oh, boy. It's a fucking mess. Oh, what would that, what would that be? Would it be nothing? I think like H02 is actually like hydrogen peroxide or something. Oh, that's, it tastes terrible.

Yeah. Yeah, like an extra O. It's like. My mouth is fizzing up. Anyways, sorry. I, I, it gives me a thing of like, this isn't, it feels so to like. Yeah. I'm, I'm, I'm just, I'm popping a top.

Popping a, and it's, and you're holding a can. Holding a can, infinitely recyclable, which they sell on the, on the, on the, I know that it's probably a waste to buy water. But not a plastic bottle. That's the thing. That's so much better than a plastic bottle. That'll, I try to avoid plastic bottles unless I'm like at an airport and don't have my refillable bottle.

Like it's just like, that's like a last resort for me. I'll buy a plastic bottle wrapped in styrofoam. That's the only way that I like. Interesting. Okay. Uh, it's kind of going the other way. Mitch, you're, you're, I know Emma has given you this note before. Plastic wrapped in styrofoam?

Yeah. You said you're going the other way? Yeah. I said you're kind of going the other way. Oh, I thought you said you were going the other way. You're going to get plastic. I stopped fighting. Fuck you, Mitch.

Am I hitting the mic? That's what I was just going to say. You're, I think you're rattling the mic. What you don't know is that we got into a huge fight this morning. Yeah. Oh, you did? Yeah. Oh man.

You gave me the deets. Oh, we don't need to do that. Well, why bring it up? Ask Mitch. You're not going to talk about it on Mike. Ask Mitch. I made a very innocuous joke. And then he made, he had a rant.

Here's a cut to the quick, eh? Yes. We're going back to the scheduling thing. Again, that episode is coming out after this one, Mitch. So just tread carefully. Just know that we're mad at each other. Actually, more me just mad at him. Yes.

And it was on Mike that you got into the fight? I don't think it was that bad. Okay. On Mike. On Mike. On Mike. So what happened? A previous episode.

Yes. Oh, that's coming out. An episode that's coming out. We've already recorded that's coming out. That's coming out after this one. Actually, a little bit after this one. You guys got into a fight on it. I mean, a minor Tiff, you took a break in between episodes,

got into a major Tiff in between. No, I'll explain the chain of events. Okay. This is like Pulp Fiction where it's told out of order. Yeah. It's thrilling. And we were wearing gimp suits as well. Okay.

Fucking each other. Mitch came in to the studio very hot. Was very enraged over something that I have apologized for that we've talked about. Something that happened beforehand. That happened beforehand. There was a text exchange that was happening where, like each of us was talking at each other when we weren't online.

Like he said something late at night. I saw it first thing in the morning and responded to him. Came at him pretty hard. I thought in kind of a playful way, but didn't come across that way. Mitch got very mad. So he started that episode just very angry at me. And that's kind of where things were,

just kind of that simmering tension. Got it, got it. But it was, yeah, it was more of a prelude to- So then you said something which was kind of a snipe, which he really meant, but it was in the guise of a joke. No. I mean, that's what he says it was. It was more so at Susser.

It was, I'll tell you exactly what it was. I mean, I'm not going to say exactly what it was. Because it's coming yet. Because it's coming. Yeah, it's coming yet. What are you doing? It's coming. Don't say exactly what it was.

I can't say exactly what it was, but basically it was this. Hey, this idea I had worked out great. People love it. And then I was like, I'll never forget all of you who didn't like this idea with an exclamation point. Very innocuous. Yes. And then it was like a hundred texts of him being like-

I don't want to relitigate this. You'll wake up in four hours and you see this. I'm cackling at you thinking of me fucking making fun of you. That was the response. Again, you're characterizing what I said harshly. You're characterizing what you said mildly. I was quote correctly quoting you. Yeah, I did say that.

But I was going to say the- Harshly and correctly. You like a guy, I want to relitigate this. What you said initially, which I've come to understand how you meant it. And I think you've maybe hopefully come to understand how I meant it, meant what my reply is. What you said initially seemed a little harsher

than you thought. It seemed like a direct attack and it seemed a little pointed. I don't know how you would think that, but I understand that. Okay. So that's partly why we're- That said, my response was disproportionate and I do apologize. I appreciate it. And you're making us look like fucking assholes

in front of daddy. No, actually you guys seem very mature because you're apologizing to each other. And this kind of stuff happens when you work together and it's nice that you're apologizing to each other. And you're, I mean, I heard him apologize, but- You know why you do it, but- You know what?

I think that he's right. I apologize to everyone who I should have apologized to. Mitch was a little, Mitch was a little heated at everyone. Like it was usually at me, but it kind of got that energy was kind of- I can kind of understand though, if he didn't mean any, if he truly didn't mean, because I've been in that situation where it's like, I say something I truly don't mean. And then someone takes it a way that was not intended

and there's no way to really convince the other person that there was nothing behind it because it's just, so you just kind of, if you're in Mitch's situation, just kind of got to go like, look, because it's almost like you're apologizing for everything in the past too of like, yes, I can see where you would, I have done stuff like that in the past, I'm sorry.

And then you just like- That was a lot of what, there was a lot of past stuff brought up after my comment. Yes. Yeah. Which I was like, what the fuck is this? Yeah. It was emotional, it was already an emotional day.

Yeah, we didn't get it. I kind of wish that you guys broke up right before my episode though. That would have been like, very funny. Yeah, this was the last episode. Yeah, because I know that what's really funny is the episode you're talking about is a milestone number, right?

Yes. If you had never reached that milestone number, but you had recorded it. That would be very funny. Should we do that? Is that funny enough to be worth it? I mean, sure, but we'll do nothing else in our lives. No, you guys can't break up.

We love you guys. You guys, I mean- God bless you. Look, we want you to stay together. I know it's hard doing something together. You both have your individual strengths and sometimes you can look at someone's strength and say, that's a weakness.

And you know, but- That's a great point. Thank you. Yeah. You guys are great together and we hope you stay together. Thank you. We needed to hear that today.

We're kind of the classic comedy pair, a guy with a big ass and a guy with no ass. You both fit on screen together. Yeah. Scott, you're from Orange County. Does that have anything to do with why you picked Orange Julius, which is such a SoCal staple? Oh my God, the oranges.

The oranges. I never really thought about that. No, I mean, I picked Orange Julius, I think, because the, well, the second one I did was a competition, right? That's right. It was in and out versus- Versus Chick-fil-A. Chick-fil-A, yeah.

This was during October Blast, which is our month of religious restaurants. Yes. I just brought it up because I think I knew that you guys had never done it before. And it was something that I loved when I was a kid and was such a treat for me. Because I would go to the mall with my parents a lot.

We would go to the Buena Park Mall and the Westminster Mall. I remember the Westminster Mall. Oh yeah, I think it's still there. And we would go to the Sears a lot. And there were two things that my brother and I would constantly ask for. And it was either the icy in the Sears, because they had an actual icy retailer in the Sears itself.

Which are fun. The machine themselves were fun, yeah. Right. Or Orange Julius. And I like Orange Julius more. And it was always such a treat to finally convince my parents that, yes, we would get one. Right.

And I haven't had one in probably 20 years, although I have a huge kind of memory of being in Atlanta, filming the Mr. Show movie, and going to see the ladies' man on a day off in a mall, in some Atlanta mall. And they're being in Orange Julius and me going like, oh my God, I'm going to have an Orange Julius. I haven't had one in so long.

And that was 22 years ago now. And that was the last time I had one, I think. So I'm looking forward to this. Here's something the ladies' man won't say when he drinks it. That's disgusting. He's not going to say that when he tries the orange. That's disgusting. I think the ladies' man movie, pretty funny.

It is funny, yeah. By the way, I was attempting to do his lisp. Nothing else in the imitation of him. Big fan of Tim. Yeah, me too, by the way. Jesus Christ. We'll cut all that out. I have a very similar fond memory of Orange Julius.

A down of the Cape Cod. I think it was the sandwich mall. In Sandwich, Massachusetts. Cape Cod. Cape Cod, Massachusetts. I think it is, oh wait, is it high? I don't know what the mall is. The mall that's close to Sandwich Mass.

Yes. My family would go down to Sandwich Mass with my godparents. We split a Cape House, which was like, I remember they got it for like 10,000 bucks or something. Now it's worth like a million. My parents sold their half of it. My parents didn't want me partying down there when I was in high school.

Sure. But we would go there, and I remember before Arachnophobia specifically. The first Thrill Amity. The first Thrill Amity. I remember getting an Orange Julius at the mall before we saw Arachnophobia and loving it. I loved it.

I was a huge fan of it. I don't think I've had it in probably maybe 30 years. I haven't had it in a very, very long time. It's funny that in the 90s we had Arachnophobia, and then George W. Bush takes office, and we have Arachnophobia. We'll be right back. Is this an actual commercial?

Welcome back to Doe Boys. We are here with Scott Ackerman talking about Orange Julius. So here's the thing. Julius Freed is the man who created Orange Julius, but not the man who created the Orange Julius drink. That was his friend, Bill Shram. So Bill Shram invents it as a milder, less acidic version of orange juice to aid digestion.

And then Julius Freed is like, I'm going to put my name on that, and that becomes their signature beverage. I can understand not putting the other guy's name on it, because his name is what Borat calls testicles. So, but, and he must have known that was going to happen. 100%. Yeah.

But what a dick move to take this guy's recipe, put his own name on it. Yeah, it never seemed like, I'm sorry, I said Bill Shram was Bill Hamlin. So it was not Bill Shram. I probably just had Borat on the brain. Wait, it wasn't Shram? No, it was Bill Hamlin.

So where did you get that? I think the joke still works. The joke still works. I mean, all things consider, it's still pretty good. Yeah, it's great. Where did you get the other name from? I had Shram in the head for some reason. I mean, there must be another name I read recently.

Bill Hamlin is the colleague. Hamlin. Bill Hamlin invents it. Julius Freed puts his name on it. I don't know if there's any animosity between them, but I have to assume it was, because this becomes this enormous sensation. We're both passed on now at this point, wouldn't you think?

Yeah, long dead. Because how long ago was this? 1926, it was opened. First location opens in 1996. I believe they're still alive. I'd like to think so. Was the official beverage of the 1964 World's Fate. And as of 1987, it is wholly owned by Dairy Queen,

and they over time converted every still-standing Orange Julius into a Dairy Queen slash Orange Julius. So there aren't any proper Orange Juliuses anymore. I was surprised when I, because I was looking for an Orange Julius around where I live, and the closest one was kind of far away, and they're all DQ slash Orange Juliuses, and I was like,

it's strange they're getting co-equal billing, because Dairy Queen seems like such a more popular brand. I was like, this is like Mitch sharing billing with Anthony Mackie on Twisted Metal. It's like, Anthony Mackie and Mike Mitchell in Twisted Metal. I hope the marketing people are listening. That's pretty good. But you know what I mean?

It seems strange, but that just goes to show how amazing this drink is that they can be like, because it's a tiny section of the menu too. Like DQ has probably five-sixths of the menu, and then Orange Julius just has like eight drinks. A little bit. I think I never say this, but it is actually an acquisition that I'm like,

this may be worked out for the better. Like it's probably good that they got acquired by Dairy Queen, because I can see them just going out of business. I don't know if Orange Julius would, yes, would have sustained in our current climate, but as a different sort of treat offered at Dairy Queen, the Dairy Queen Treat Center, as it makes sense. And you would think that Dairy Queen

could have just introduced a similar drink. Yeah. But maybe this is so iconic. I mean, it just has an iconic taste to me. It really is truly distinct. Like I had a sip and it was like drinking a memory. I was like, oh yeah, I remember this. That's how I felt too.

In fact, my whole trip was like a memory. Wow. What? Wow. My whole trip was like a memory. What trip? What do you mean? When you went to Orange Julius?

You went to Total Recall? When I walked into, I went to the Burbank Town Center Mall. That's the closest one to me. Yeah. And walking in there, I felt like I was 12 years old again. It was like this incredible feeling where there were a lot of, I didn't even know people went to this mall. I don't know if I've ever even stepped foot in this mall.

I think we actually maybe went, what's the Chinese food restaurant that's a chain? P.F. Changs? P.F. Changs. That's where Coolop used to work. That's right. And I knew that. I think I'd been there.

I think we went together there at one point. I filmed- It's now gone though. It's not, they got- P.F. Changs is gone? I think they got rid of the P.F. Changs area. I filmed in the mall for a pilot I did with Andy Dick. We filmed, you were in that pilot.

Oh my God, yeah. We filmed the Glass Elevator. It was a really good idea for a show. I thought it was basically like talk show in an elevator. And so Andy Dick had a talk show desk and mic and all that. And then Jack Black was the guest and people were getting on and off the elevator during the show, essentially. And we filmed that in that mall.

Did people know, or did you just let- They would walk in and go like, oh, what is this? And they would know. I mean, they knew both of them, but it was more like Jack Black, what are you doing here? That's crazy. When were waivers being signed? When they would step off.

Okay. Wow. That's that schedule in brain. There he is. But you know what? Interesting about the waivers. These are questions that we had for a few weeks leading up to the shoot.

So we don't want to have to keep blurring faces. Me and the birthday boys played ninjas in that show. Yeah, you were great. That was fun. That was a good show. It was an interesting show where we filmed it and he was great at the time. And we turned it in and the exec called me and said,

oh, hey, we're not picking it up. He goes, and honestly, we were never going to pick it up, but we just had extra money in the budget. And we were kind of like, let's throw it to Andy. And I was like, you told me you were really excited about it when you asked me to do it. I was like, well, what are you mad? You got paid for it, right?

I was like, yeah, but you bank your, you're looking to make something that will make multiple episodes. It's not just like work on a thing. It was so bizarre. One of the weirdest conversations I've had with an exec. Really bizarre. Hollywood execs, 20 years ago today, they're still doing great wigs.

We love them. They're doing great and the rest of us. Can I say that the classic orange Julius, their titular drink is five ingredients. Milk, sugar, vanilla extract, orange juice concentrate, and ice. And it's what it was. I thought egg whites as well.

Egg whites aren't always included. But yeah, this is, I saw my orange Julius being made. Yeah. And there was some sort of powder that he put in it. That might be the vanilla. Could be. That could be the vanilla. It could also be just like the, you know,

whatever their sweetener is they're using these days. Or it could be like a powdered dairy mix. What I'm going to say is, what I remember is the orange Julius, the actual orange Julius, some of the variants. But I also remember their food, which is obviously long since discontinued. But they used to have hot dogs.

Well, we used to go to a hot dog on a stick for the hot dogs. Okay. But I think you're right that they had some stuff. Yeah, they had, they looked up, they had devil dogs. And what I remember they specifically had a devil dog with pepperoni, which was the first time I thought you could like, oh, you can put pizza toppings on a hot dog. It blew my little mind.

Burr, you know what, I like that you back it up because I thought that there could have been a chance that young lager is just bringing a hot dog to our Julius. Do you mind if I have this here? Yeah, you don't have to ask us. So Mitch, I also went to the Burbank location, which is a DQ OJ treat center. And I picked up some, Scott, you want an orange Julius original,

strawberry Julius original, I picked up one of each for you and me. So I've got those ones. Strawberry banana, right? Strawberry banana. Strawberry banana, I apologize. I also got a triple, no, this is, no, this is tasted. It's a banana.

It's got banana in it. I just wrote it on my notes wrong. It is a strawberry banana. Minion man for getting a banana. Hey, the minions, they're objectively funny, right? That's, they're very funny. Nick, Nick lives by that. They're very funny.

We, we did a, Scott hasn't seen Despicable Me episode. I heard about this. Yeah. And after we put it out, everyone was like, why wasn't Nick on it? I said, I didn't know you were a minion. Super. Oh yeah, big time. But we're in a mini shirt today.

He is actually wearing a minion shirt. Come back on the pod and we'll do another minion show. I'd love to. Yeah. Yeah, they're very funny. Did you talk about Despicable Me or did you talk about one of the minions standalone? The first one.

Because I never, that was the only one I, well, I've never seen any of them until then. Yeah. I think DM2 is the best in the franchise, but I like that the minions have two split timelines now. You have like both, you have like young, it's like young Sheldon. Just like the X-Men.

Yeah, exactly. Yes. Yeah. When days of future pass kind of reset everything and set them on a different timeline. Yeah. 100%. I was also thinking of Big Bang Theory,

how there's young Sheldon and there's Big Bang Theory and there's two different Sheldons. At some point they're going to meet up. I think Jim Parsons is going to play young Sheldon. Wow. What a moment that'll be. It's like in Looper when Joseph Gordon-Levitt turns into Bruce Willis in one shot.

You're like, oh, wow. And I think Jim Parsons will be wearing a fake nose, like Joseph Gordon-Levitt. But I think this is just what I've heard. Yeah. From the young Sheldon writer's room, is that they're doing an Olympics episode and literally they're going to be passing the torch in a scene.

Wow. And it'll be Jim Parsons like picking it up from young Sheldon. The Olympics are so protective about their own intellectual property. They decided that they were going to make an exception. They were going to license it. Oh, they're going to license the Olympics. Yeah, they're going to license the Olympics. Yeah.

That's a big thing. They were doing sort of a swap where it was like the 2024 Olympics are going to be presented by young Sheldon. Yes. And so it's kind of like a tit for tat kind of thing. Right. But yeah, it's really exciting. You don't mix it with young Sheldon, right?

What's that? Is that he's not young enough? He tuned in. I've talked about this. It's like, guys, I think I'm a little bit younger. A little bit younger. You know what I mean? Like even six months.

More of a casting challenge. But you know, we noticed that he was younger. Even three months I would be like, all right, yes, yeah. Okay, this is more what I like. And they could use the same actor and just like DHM three months. Do the Irishman on this guy. Yeah, the Irishman.

Well, that's what they're doing with Jim Parsons. Because you know, obviously he's a 60-year-old band now. Right. But he's going to be playing 14. Because this is a young Sheldon episode called The Pubes. Yeah, it's set at the Olympics. And it's where young Sheldon like, boink! He gets his first pube and turns.

He morphs Michael Jackson black or white style into Jim Parsons. Well, I heard they were originally going to do like an American werewolf in London style like practical translation. And that was just too expensive. Well, they were going to do a Dr. Jackson with Mr. Hyde. He falls down behind a desk. So there's, I mean, this is all just from the writers.

Yes. From what I've heard. And this is Hollywood gossip. And also some of the other side. The Olympics, like he sees the gymnast and that like sets on the puberty. Yeah. Like that's like that one. And then he points at the gym and goes,

is that me? And then it's Jim has the actual young Sheldon. Yeah, it's kind of a fourth wall breaking joke. They're thinking of a lot of clever stuff like that. It's so meta, but it's really entertaining. It's really good. It makes sense that it's one of the world's most popular shows. It makes sense.

Well, the one thing I have heard that has been retained through all the drafts, like it is still in it, like it's still made it all the way through. Because, you know, these scripts changed like that. It's like the chip of Theseus. The yellow draft. The golden rod. Oh, golden rod.

Okay. So many different iterations by the time this thing actually goes to be filmed. But the one thing is that there is an extreme close-up of his first pube. Yeah. Like that's still in there. Is it still in the shape of the Olympic rings? Yes. Yeah.

Yeah. That's kind of curled up. It's kind of curled up. And when they say extreme close-up, they mean like microscopic. Yeah. Yeah. You can see like dust mites and everything like that. Osmosis Jones is in there.

Yeah. Osmosis Jones is doing a cameo. We weren't supposed to talk about that. Sorry. Can we cut things out? We can cut some things out. Yeah, we can cut. We can get a lot of stuff out.

Okay. Make sure that's cut out. Okay, we'll get that. Because the Osmosis Jones thing is supposed to be a secret, so. I'm looking forward to it. People are going to be really excited. I'm not. Sounds bad to me.

You know, we were just talking about the minions. Yeah. There's a chance it's bad. There's a chance it's bad. There's a chance it could be bad. I don't know. And what we're describing sounded extremely good, but there's a chance it's bad. We're talking minions.

Yeah. And earlier, we were saying Panama, because of our Panamanian, or Panama. Alfonso. Yeah, Alfonso, maybe. It was Alvaro. I'll look it up. Alvaro, Alvaro, yes. What about the parody song?

Banana. Yes, finally. When you say what about, is it a song that actually exists, or are you making this up right now? Well, if it exists and I don't know about it, I'll feel stupid, but I think it doesn't exist. Okay, so when you were saying what about the parody song, it's this one I'm about to say.

Yeah, like, is this good? I guess is what I'm saying. I think 100%. Okay, great. It's great. I'm with Scott's old answer. I don't think it was good. Okay, so I get the Orange Julius Original, Strawberry Banana Julius Original,

and the Triple Berry Premium Fruit Smoothie, which is Strawberry, Raspberry, and Blackberry. That was one that we were highlighting, so I was like, you know what, if I'm gonna get a smoothie, I'll get that one. I got the one for myself. And I knew that one wouldn't hold up in the fridge. So, you know what, I just sucked down that one, and I mean, I think that one was maybe a little bit too sweet for me.

It also was just kind of like a generic smoothie. Like, it was just like this. I guess the advantage is it was notably cheaper than like a Jamba Juice. But it was that, like, you could have told me this was from Jamba. I was like, yeah, all right, sure, you know. This is what I found with Orange Julius, and this is how I felt growing up. The classic Orange Julius, the combination is just incredible. The tartness of the orange mixed with the sweetness of the vanilla,

and the foam, and everything about it is so good. When you start to order the other ones, I was as disappointed with the Strawberry Banana as I was when I was a kid when I would order it. It's something about it is too sweet. It needs that tartness to contrast with the vanilla, I think. Yeah, fully agree. You know what I kind of liked? I got the Orange Julius and the Strawberry Julius.

And I kind of liked my Strawberry Julius. You liked it better. I loved the Orange Julius as a drink. And I also hadn't had it in a real long time. And I was like, is this the best version of it? Like, I remembered it being a little bit more creamy and bubbly and a little bit more milky tasting because the tart was really tart. But it is, it's like that tart, it's like that tart orange,

like you're really feeling, you're really tasting that juice. You're feeling that zest. You're feeling that zing, that zip from that citrus. I loved it. Like I said, I watched into this Burbank town center mall and I could smell like pizza getting cooked at a Sabarro. What percentage of the stores are still open? Because when I filmed there, you know, this is 15 years ago,

it was like two out of the three stores were still open. It's probably around those numbers now. You know what's funny is that there's a, I thought it was to say, to me, it looked like a 30% occupancy. Really? It looked pretty, pretty barren. You're probably, I mean, maybe closer to 50%.

But the thing is that a lot of what I saw, I don't know if it wouldn't, you were in there kind of early wags, but there's like local businesses. There was like a nail, like a nail place that was like really crowded when I was in there. And it was like, oh, okay. So people are still using this place. But like it's more just like local businesses off the street.

They're not, I'm sure it's not popular enough where the rent is all. It's maybe cheaper for them to be in this dead mall. No, this is actually an evolution of malls, is like the chains of kind of like receded. And there's a lot of like, you know, businesses serving the local working classes. Which is interesting. Yeah, like no, like not a lids,

but like a nail snail salon that was like packed. And I gotta tell you, another thing that was packed, besides me seeing John Wick 4, and it's still being kind of a big crowd, was the line for DQ slash Orange Julius was gigantic. Really? It was, I'd like to hear that. There was a family of seven,

and then a family of five, both in front of me. Wow. You talking aunts and uncles in that family of seven? You know what, I think there was an uncle in one of them. Hell yeah. Could also be like a really old son. It might have been a really old son that like looks old. Or a very, very young grandpa.

Is the young grandpa? It might have been a young grandpa. It might have been a Sheldon scenario. Is there a Guinness Book of World Records for the youngest grandpa ever? I'm sure there is. What do you think, a 20? Oh man, it's probably around 20.

When you start to think about it, it gets upsetting. Because then you think about it at what age was where people impregnated in subsequent generations. It's gotta be like 10 and 10. Yeah. It's probably 20 is the oldest, yeah, 20. The oldest grandpa, sorry. The oldest young grandpa.

The oldest young grandpa is at least 20. I think it gets younger after that too. I want to know this now. I mean, I'll try to look it up. We'll bring it. Youngest grandpa. And then look up bad grandpa so we can- Yeah, let's just watch some clips.

All right, great. Family of seven and a family of five ordered before me. I took this note down for whatever reason. And it took about 30. You're like a citizen journalist. I'm writing a lot of things in here. I wrote down that I call my cat Gravy Boy.

It is just one note that says Gravy Boy on it. Um, it's like a, you know- You need to write notes for yourself of what you call your cat. Wow. It's like, imagine Harris' foam corner, but unfunny. You said wow because I want to get back to your story, but have you found the answer?

It's a youngest grandpa? Yeah, well, I had it. Like, the answer was displayed to me, but it's at the top of a listicle. So I get some scrolling to do. But to the youngest grandpa, the youngest grandma is upsetting. The youngest grandpa, I believe, was 23.

I mean, as grandpas go? Yeah. That's not, you know, that's a good age. It's a good age to be a grandpa. Australian was the youngest, it's an Australian person. It was the youngest grandfather in the world, at the age of 23.

Cricky. Yeah. Well, look, it's a prison island. That's a good point. There's nothing else to do. Rie Osmond became a grandma at 53. Really? How about that?

Oh, good for her. Yeah. Of course, Sarah Palin became a grandma at 44 when she was a vice presidential candidate. That's right. How about that? She was 44 then, huh? Yeah.

Her daughter was like 17. Geez. We love them for it. We love them. I think I'm with you that the, Scott, I pretty much agree that the strawberry banana underwhelms versus the orange Julius. But my memory, Mitch, of the strawberry Julius,

which was my other go-to, was that it was good. I maybe could have gotten just like a regular strawberry Julius for comparison, because this one is pretty banana heavy. Not that I have anything against banana, but it is just, it kind of dominates the flavor. I had a blast with it. It kind of gave a similar vibe of the orange Julius,

just a little less tart. Yeah. Interesting. The orange Julius is tart. I, but I, don't get me wrong, I had a blast drinking my orange Julius. I went outside. I sat alone on that little-

Sounds so fun. It was, it was, I was going to take a pic. There was a Marvel machine, Wags. I think you saw it. I did see the Marvel machine. What is that? There was a Marvel machine where you could get a picture taken with like a Marvel hero.

I was going to do it. Like a fake photo booth. I could have done it with Anthony Mack. That would have been funny if I did it. It would have been so funny, because did he ever let you take a picture with him on set? No. In fact, the first day he came up to me,

he told me specifically, you specifically, I will not take a photo with. Yeah, yeah, I get it. Which I understand. Weirdly, I get that a lot on every set I go on. Was he also like, I don't want to be photographed in the show with you as well? There's a lot of scenes where I kind of like the Jekyll and Hyde thing,

where I just fall behind a table just to be out of the scene. Right. Anytime he walks in, you're like, whoop, whoop. You just duck. It's interesting. I like, because you talk about being photographed, and I learned from the fable men's that like film is just a series of steel images.

Yeah, I learned. Just a bunch of photographs that simulate motion. I feel like, and I don't know, Nick, I feel weird saying this, because this is, it's not a Hollywood podcast, but a lot of Hollywood insiders listen to it. But I almost feel like the fable men's was an ode to cinema. Yeah, it kind of was like a love letter to like the motion.

I don't know that I would go that far. This is inside, it was technically a movie. It's true. We told the Tom Cruise story in this today, we're letting somebody inside Hollywood stuff out. What I learned from the fable men's is that Steven Spielberg's mom fucked his dad's friend. It's a fascinating story.

I like the fable men's. I liked it as well. I liked it quite a bit. Good movie. And it seems that that's a big part of the movie is. It's weird though, Spielberg fable men. Like, I don't know. It's a more sonorous name for sure.

Why not call it the Spielberg's? That's, I kind of agree with you. Well, okay, so I watched the fable men's and afterwards, I saw it with my wife Natalie and she was like, that kid was supposed to be Steven Spielberg. I was like, are you kidding me? Like, I was just like, I didn't. And so that was the thing.

Like, I didn't realize the fable men's were standing for the Spielberg's. I didn't even get that until you just said it. Yeah, she was like, that's him, the director. That's so crazy. Wow, that's wild. She was like, putting in your car seat. I was going to take that picture.

It was $10 for the picture. $10 the Marvel thing. I stood in the Marvel machine and then the, in which it was already embarrassing. That's free, I bet. Right. That is free. Right.

You can stand in the booth for free. They should charge you $9 to stand in the machine and then an extra dollar for the picture because at that point, you've already paid the nine. It's chill. I think at that point, you've already made, you've already paid the price. You're pot committed.

Yeah. You've paid the price of looking like a true loser. So like, if you're standing in the machine, me, a 40 year old man in the machine, it was like, I might as well have just swiped my card and got the picture for $10. Where are the Marvel people? I'm trying to do my midge.

It's been a long time since I've done it. It is a slow, a little bit of Boston still kind of left over. I used to do all of you guys. Wags too? No, no, no. I mean, the birthday boys. Oh, the birthday boys? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because it's, well, you got my can for it. Well, oh, pretty good. Oh, hi there. Anyway. And you got Tim Calpakis. It's kind of like that. Tim Calp, yeah. What?

Why would you do that to me? You know, it's interesting because it's trying to distinguish between the seven of us is, was actually a big problem for a lot of people, is that we were very similar playing. You were the last great show that only featured white people. Hats off to you.

I would sometimes just be cut like people would just compliment me on the birthday. Yeah, that's assuming I was a birthday boy. I was like, why not? I could fit right in. Sure, why not? Thanks. That would happen a lot too.

Yeah, you did. You did though. I remember you opened or did the warmup comic. He did. He did a great job too. Did a great job. Is so much so that because were you disguised? Did you have a costume on?

Because I came in and I was like, who is that? And someone said, that's Weiger. Yeah. He's like, oh, I did. I did a character. I did it as Trevor. I was a warmup guy, Trevor. And you had to do way more time than you thought you would do.

I had to vamp for like four hours. And people enjoyed that more. They enjoyed the live portion of our show. I wouldn't say that, but I will say that it is funny that I did that. And it was a very hard day of work, but fun. And then that entire live wrap arounds for the show got cut in the edit.

It got cut out of the edit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's talk some more about Orange Chilies. I mean, are there any thoughts? Do we just get to our fork scores? Well, I went there. I felt like a 12-year-old. I loved being back in the mall.

I got those Orange Chilies as I drank them alone. Why did you mention the family of five and the family of seven? Oh, because it took me a half an hour to order. It took me a very long time to order. I kind of loved it. Because they all had their individual orders. They all had individual orders. It was two person counter, but it was like, it was mobbed.

I kind of loved it, too. I had nowhere to be. I went and saw John Wick 4 afterwards. He did have somewhere to be. Well, at 6.15, I went and saw John Wick 4. But it was more of a, I'm here. I'm going to go see John Wick 4. At a mall, where the movie theater is on the third,

it's at the top level of the mall. It's a two-screener, is that right? Because that was the only movie theater for a while there in Burbank. And then they got the six-seater kind of adjacent. And then they opened the huge 18. Who would ever go to the one in the mall? That's what I said to Weigher.

There is a vibe in there that there's not a good vibe in that theater. But I think there's maybe a few more screens, but it's on the top level of the mall. But I was loving my experience. I was like, the mall was kind of thriving. I was like, this is bizarre to see that there's a lot of people enjoying it.

And I kind of enjoyed my experience, Weigher. I enjoyed my Orange Julius. Can you enjoy it if you're not in a mall, I wonder? I mean, I enjoyed mine just having it here, but it seems synonymous with a mall, right? I agree. And I also, the fact that I went and saw, maybe that was some sort of mental thing,

if I went and saw a movie, because the last time I remember seeing it, I went and saw Arachnophobia. I will say that, I think not only does it hit better in a mall, I think it has to be an indoor mall specifically. Because I've headed an outdoor shopping center, it's not the same. Weigher gave the projectionist an autofocus, and he watched autofocus after.

Interesting. There's that one scene I want to watch on the live. Here's another question that I have. You go to a DQ slash Orange Julius. Yes. Do you order the Orange Julius, or is the DQ stuff? DQ's pretty good. I'd rather have the DQ stuff, but maybe I get an Orange Julius.

If you're in the mood for a tank, try your Orange Julius. Yeah, of course. And also, you're a strawberry banana. Yeah. Julius. I'm handing these over to Mitch. This is thrilling. You know what?

I'm casting. I'm going to say this, mine was more tart. Mine had a more tart Orange flavor than yours. I love the taste of this. This is more of how I remember it. Mine was more tart. It wasn't too much OJ? I don't know.

There was one worker there, and she was an absolute champ, and blended up my juices ably. Not much of a crowd, but yeah, just they're doing good work. That was always so fun when you would order it, too. And you'd watch them put the ice in. Oh, my God. So that's like, just always just watching the process behind it. What a treat.

I don't know. It's so... The banana, the banana is not good. The banana makes it taste like a smoothie. That's the issue. It's not a Julius. It's just not a Julius. Or a scrum.

Or a hamlin. Hamlin. There you go. Yeah. The strawberry Julius without the banana is way, way, way, way, way better. Way better. Way better. This tastes like, this just tastes kind of like a not great smoothie.

Yeah. I don't see, that's the thing. DQ has great stuff. You guys have covered DQ. We have, yes. But the blizzards. Yeah. Dairy Queen won the Tournament of Chompians Munch Madness.

Dairy Queen won our dessert tournament. Wow. Yeah. So, what was I called? Do you remember? Fucking, I don't know. Sweet Delights or something. Yeah, Licky.

But that's the thing, the orange Julius, just nothing, nothing hits like it in that certain way of like, I'm in a mall, let me have this. I don't know if I, I might go for the Julius over the DQ stuff if I see the combo. I don't know. I love the blizzards so much, but there are certain moods I'd be in where I'd be like, I'd rather have the orange Julius. But do you feel like it's a lighter drink? Yes, 100%.

No, this is not going to give me the rumblies. It isn't that bad, right? I mean, obviously it's not good for you, but it's like, that's like what, like 200, 300, maybe 200? I mean, it's pretty bad. It's liquid sugar. It's not something you should be having regularly, but I do think it's probably healthier for you and certainly easier on the digestion than like a big old,

you know, fucking shake from, or, you know. It's been that right now, I like it a lot. Yeah, there's just something, I mean, you get that, you go get a hot dog, you know? Or you just have one. Yeah, you bring it to there and say, I eat this in front of you. I don't know, it just seems like a good day to me. I know that some of this may be nostalgia driven, but it is that sort of thing of I would be sad if it didn't exist and I'm happy that it still exists.

And I don't take advantage of it often, but also that's an issue with DQ. We talked about this, there's not a ton of DQs. I mean, that Burbank Town Center 8. Is that the closest one? There used to be one on like Gower. I think that one is gone. That one's gone, yeah. Until we like, at least in the LA area, there are a lot of DQs nationwide.

The first time we traveled to DQ was so fucking, it was with... We went down to like Tustin. Cassidy and Paul Rust. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, so fucking far. We went down to a, but that was to try the hot food menu, because most of the DQs are treat centers, the ones with the grills. What the fuck are they called?

Grill and Chill. There's the grill and chills and there's like the broilers or whatever the fuck. We had to go to one of those. DQ, when I was growing up, it was just kind of soft serve. I mean, just how much they've grown and expanded. You really got to give it up to them. Pleasure to see you. I agree.

You were saying it sarcastically, but me and Wagner, I think, really do give it up to them. 100%. You never say anything sarcastically. Well, look, we're going to get to our fork scores on Orange Julius right after this break. Welcome back to Doughboys. Scott Ockerman, it is time for our fork scores on Orange Julius. So here's how this will work. We'll each go around.

We'll give a closing argument if you will. And then end that by giving it a score from zero to five forks. You are a guest. We'll begin with you. Well, you're right, Mitch. Nostalgia is probably playing into this. Nothing really can take you back to a memory like a smell, but a taste as well. Just especially a taste that you haven't had in decades can just make you feel young again.

And I know we're all getting up there and we're all on that race to death. And we all hope to come in last. But to have a treat that just brings you back to those childhood feelings, it's a lot like, you know, dandelion wine, getting new sneakers, you know, like I was just at the Buster Browns and I got new sneakers. And I got it as a treat. I begged my mom to get an Orange Julius. Watching the Olympics and having your pubes bring out.

Just growing in the shape of the rings, the five rings, each symbolizing a continent. It's, there's just nothing like it. And I truly think that if I were going to wait in line for a half hour like you, I think I would go for the OJ. And this is an OJ that has held up since the 90s. I'm going to give it four and a half forks. Four and a half forks. Yeah.

Very high score. I kind of love it. I think OJ also has held up since the 90s. Yeah. He's striving now. I, this is very nostalgia driven for me because it truly is like close to 30 years, if not 28 or 27 years since I've had Orange Julius. And it was a place that I like, it would be that sort of thing of like you brought up

and I was like, yeah, Orange Julius is awesome. It's cool. Yeah. It's, it's, it's a great treat. Just never, never was spread out enough for me to have it constantly unless I was down the cape or whatever. So it wasn't like a thing that I could have a lot of. But stepping in that mall and just the, I was, I was very happy yesterday, Wags.

As opposed to today. Woke up, things were different. It was a different world this morning. The cold reality, I came back to it. But for this one day. For this one day, I was, I was on cloud nine. I had an Orange Julius. I went into the theater.

I had a popcorn. I watched John Wick for, for four hours. You didn't realize the four stood for how many hours it was going to be. It's weird that the first one is just an hour. And the second one is two. When you're like, this feels like a movie. Third one, it's like, huh, this is as long as the Godfather. Yeah.

And this one, four hours. Four hours. It was a lot. And it's really not until this one that it like clicked for me of like the pattern of, oh, the runtime is the number. Well, it's also he, John Wick, the character turns to the camera at the end of each and says, see the number matched the number of hours. So it's something that we should have gotten before this.

Yeah. Why usually leave like before the credit start? Yeah. I just want to like be trafficked. Because you, well, you also hate knowing anyone who works on the movie. I don't want to know any of that shit. I want to think it was real. He also, it's a weird thing he does because he leaves before the credits happen.

So sometimes he just calls it. He's like, I think this is the end. Yeah. I think I'm out of here. And you've made that mistake a lot of times. I've whiffed a few times. Like I, the usual suspects ending, I totally missed. Yeah.

You left Jaws when Quint was getting eaten. Yeah. I remember. Oh man, Jaws won. This can't go on. Yeah. It's a sad one. You left Alien before the Alien came out, right?

Because. Yeah. Wow. You were like, I came here expecting an alien. There's no alien to be had. Good. But like, if he doesn't pop up in the first scene. I sort of started to think like, oh, this is like a metaphor for how they're alienated

from each other. That's where the title comes from. You hate metaphors. I don't need that shit. You left at the dinner scene. I left at the dinner scene. Yeah. Which is about eating.

I've told you this just recently. That scene, the scene in Aliens with Alien pops out is about eating. It's about eating out a lady. They're talking about, they're talking about, why do I get so flustered over just trying to say eating pussy? That's what the scene, do you know that? Have you guys covered pussy in this show yet? Or.

Neither of us tried it. You guys are Italian mobs, right? You don't do that. It'll be nostalgic for us too for when we were birthed. We'll try it at some point. But that famous scene around it is pretty lewd. Yeah, people don't remember because the alien pops out. Right.

I have to admit that I think I was like 35 or 40 when I rewatched Star Wars and realized that Luke Skywalker is a moisture farmer. Yes. I remember seeing that going, that's stupid. I just didn't remember that from when I was a kid. I think it's a derived from Dune. It's tattooing is so much like Arrakis and it's just like, oh, moisture is just so precious in this arid climate.

We've got to harvest it. Well, they announced three more today. So you are all going to come out. It's also weird. He's a moisture farmer and yet it's established in the Star Wars canon that they all take 45 minute showers and it's like, it's like on a desert planet is that when moisture is so rare, is that wise thing to do? But they talk about it.

They're like, hey, Luke, how was your 45 minute shower this morning? Well, Chewie, you understand because that's how you get into it with Chewie and they're like, hey, Chewie, Chewie's taking a 45 minute shower and he comes out. I was like, oh, that hair, that's going to take some time to wash. And Yoda makes sense, Yoda. He's like, lots of cracks and crevices. Like he says that and you're like, okay, that takes 45 minutes. We get it.

And then Bulba Fett's doing it. It's like, okay, he's got armor off. I guess he doesn't have to start the shower and then start taking off the armor. Yeah, but he does it. Yeah, he starts it first and then it's like, dude, come on. But he wants to keep that helmet on. This is the way. But I mean, for the other character, I mean, for Luke, it's like Luke, you're a young man.

Yeah, you probably smell after, you know, 14 hours is working in the moisture fields and all that, but 45 minutes is like long. Yeah, that's like for him and like Jack Black and Lizzo's characters. Yeah, your wonder is like, should it take them as long to shower? I don't think so. Yeah. Well, they also, they shower together. So it's like, okay, I can kind of understand the 45 minutes if it's together.

But then they, in that Mandalorian episode, towards the end, they say, oh, by the way, we take separate 45 minute showers, which is like, guys, what? And Grogu shouldn't take 45 minutes. No, come on. I agree. They're keeping that a secret at this point. You just know the final episode. They're going to reveal it.

By the way, Grogu, 45 minutes. Shower starts going. He just robes. Single green puke comes out, turns into the Olympic rings. Then he docks behind a table and Yoda stands up. It's going to be great. Puse I have. Shit fucking rules.

Mitch, you were talking about your thoughts on Orange Julius. We got a, we got a fork score from Scott. It really took me back in time, Wags. I really enjoyed my experience there. It's hard for me to go below four forks. Forks doesn't really four straws, I guess, which are on the table. All right, four forks. You're just going to take that from him.

You're your own man. He's the boss. He is the boss. He's really, you should have seen it today. He's really, he's the boss. But I think that a part of this review is now that it's a part of DQ. I wish that I could taste it from 30 years ago and compare it to how it is now. I'm sure that it's maybe not as good, but sipping that yesterday,

mine was just a little too orange juicy, a little too tart. But that was like, that was, that was perfect. That's like what I remember of Orange Julius. And that's why yesterday I was like kind of a little more towards the strawberry side, but I love that drink and I'm happy that it exists. So I go four forks. It falls to me whether this particular chain, Orange Julius, enters the hallowed halls.

I mean, should it be? I mean, as a, I don't know, like it's barely exists is the thing. Are you trying to say that you need to combine it with a DQ in order to properly score it? I mean, it's barely a restaurant now. It's just, you can get different Orange Julius. And then they say like these like smoothies, which doesn't, to me, don't count. It has co-equal billing. It does, which is, I mean, I think that's, to what you were saying,

it's a testament to how good that drink is, is that it stayed on the marquee forever. Yeah, you would think that, that DQ would just adapt it and say like, this is the orange vanilla drink or whatever. And then make their own and not pay whatever they paid for Orange Julius, but it's the branding is so strong. Yeah, it is strong. You know, you hear Orange Julius and if you've had one, you know what that is. You know what it is.

The very specific taste. And it is an item that you'll sometimes have a specific craving for. Here's how I would think of it, Mitch. Your beloved Dunkin Donuts has some hybrid locations with Baskin Robbins. That's right. Now imagine if Dunkin were to say, you know what, we're not getting away, a writ of standalone Baskin Robbins. Every existing Baskin Robbins is going to be a half Dunkin, half Baskin Robbins.

I still think you can review Baskin Robbins separately from Dunkin Donuts. And that's the situation we find ourselves in here. But the thing that was tricky is that we could really only review the drinks. You can only review the drinks. So that's all they have. But again, if you go to these locations, these are the treat centers where it's like all the only thing they have of the Dairy Queen side is their desserts. Like they don't have their hot food menu.

So they're also limited. I think the Orange Julius itself is a home run. And it's a thing that you can only get there. And if we talk about this podcast from the standpoint of its premise, which is, is this chain succeeding at what it's attempting to do? Orange Julius produces the titular Orange Julius and it hits exactly as you want, at least most of the time. And, you know, when I got this version, I was like,

this is exactly what I remember. And this is exactly what I like. And sometimes this is exactly what I need. So I see no reason to deny it for forks. I'm going for forks for Orange Julius. I think this place belongs in the Golden Play Club. And this is a signature chain. I think this is a chain that informs the identity of all chains.

For almost 100 years as well. Yeah. I mean, there's no arguing that. Coming up on Orange Julius' Centennial, how wild is that? That's so crazy. 2026, 100 years of Orange Julius. I love it. I would be sad if it didn't exist.

Just it takes it back in time. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Wow. Good stuff. Wow. Good stuff.

I can't believe it. I can't believe it made it in. I'm a little surprised, but you know what? It makes sense in hindsight. Hey, that was our review of Orange Julius. It's time for a segment. This is a new one. This is a pitch of our associate producer, Amelia Marino.

This is what she calls the pun game. I'll read the rules. Well, I'll come in last of this. I'm almost sure of it. You're going to do great. We'll see. All right, all right. All right.

I'll read the rules. Believe in yourself. And then we may need our headphones for this one. Because Emma is going to drive this one. Because I've not heard these candidates for buns. Need this today. Nick, Mitch, and Scott are given a television title. I assume a name of a show.

And must come up with a list of food puns based on that title. There are no turns. You should shout out the puns as you think of them. The quality of the pun doesn't matter. So we're stressing quantity over quality. When it seems like an example or. I would think like, well, because I don't know what the actual shows are. But like, let's say it was the Stimpsons.

Then you could say the Shrimpsons. Right. So it's going to be a food. OK, I got you. I got you. Food based puns. OK. Related to the particular topic.

And then there are 10 titles total, apparently. Amelia adds that the puns don't have to be a spin on just the title alone. You can make puns about relevant quotes, actors, characters, etc. So for instance, there in the The Simpsons Shrimpsons example, you could also say. Dan White Castle Annetta. That's that's a fucking homerun. Fuck, we're fucked.

This will be fun. All right, Emma, how are you doing? I'm good. How are you guys? You ready? We're doing all right. All right. I got Succession as your first TV show.

Succession. The HBO drama. Suck off. For like sucking through a straw. That is good. What are the character's names? Logan Roy. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Logan Rob Roy. Logan Rob Roy, yeah. Logan Roll. Here we go. OK. What's a Logan Roll? Logan Roll. I told you that I wouldn't be good at this.

Cousin. But Cluck Session. That's yeah. That is that's the answer. Succession, IPA. That's good. Jeremy Strong. No, that's real.

Jeremy's actual name. Strong Coffee. Yes. Jeremy Straw. There you go. I keep getting straw ones. That's OK. I've seen the shows, so I know it,

but I cannot tell you anyone's name on it. Yeah. Hey, you want a new show? Yeah, let's do one. Yeah, new show. We did really well on that one. That was a great start around. All right.

Who got points for that one? That's an aperitif. We all get points. OK, we all got a point. Points. Everybody gets points. Frazier. Frazier.

Frazier Candy Cane. Eddie the hot dog. That's really good. That's good. John Bologna. Detective Martin Candy Cane. Is that the dad? Yeah.

I don't have an answer. Who was the DJ who was there for the pilot and then never came out? Oh, yeah. I don't remember. I know what you're talking about. I don't remember the character's name. Right.

But then you had Roz, right? You had Roz who was there for me. Roz. Yeah. Straws. Straws. Yeah. That's a really good job.

Again, once again, it's another straw answer for me. I mean, but when you do something well, why deviate? That's a good point. All right, straws is my answer. Straws. How about... Friles.

That's good. I was trying to think of something just with Seattle. I couldn't really even think of something. How about Kale Chicken of the Sea Grammar? That's good. That's really good. That's really good. That's really good.

All right, new show. All right, all right. How am I supposed to take points for this? Am I supposed to give you each a point every time you come up with a pun? I don't know. Did Amelia include that in the description? Yeah, I think I'm supposed to take a point

every time you guys make up a pun, but I lost track already, but that's fine. I think the fun is playing the game. Yeah. That's a good point. But let's just say we each have eight points at this point. You all leave it. We each have eight points.

All right, fair enough. So now you actually want to compete? And also, I said eight points, A-T-E. But that doesn't get you... That doesn't get you... That doesn't get you any... Okay, he has nine. But I'm saying like I'm still playing the game.

That doesn't get you points. You don't get points for the pun on the game. I don't know how many points we have. All right, your next show is Sesame Street. Oh. Sesame Bagel. All right. Snuffle cup of coffee, Gus.

Sesame Meat. Instead of Grover Clover. Big fried bird. The way you looked at me for Clover. I don't know what it is. What's Clover? Is Clover a food? Do you mean like cloves?

Oh, yeah, I meant clove. I can say like Clover Honey. How about Grocer? Instead of Grover. Instead of Grover, Grocer. I mean... How about Cookie Muncher? Instead of Cookie Muncher?

He's already a monster who loves cookies. Kind of begs the question, why didn't they call him Cookie Muncher? That's mainly what he does. That's the YouTube cookie muncher. Yeah, more visceral. I wish Jim Hanson was still alive. I'd at him. What about Jim Hanson?

Because you have to go to the gym after you eat a lot of food. That's good. That's really good. That's good. All I know is that this game is fantastic. This is the best. Are you saying we have six more? You have as many more as you want.

Do you want less? Let's have another show. How about a time for one more? One, two, three. Sandwiches. Okay, that's good. That counts. That counts.

All right. Even though it is just something he would do, I guess. Hold on, whatever. It's fine. It counts. How about the birthday boys? Whoa. Wow.

Mike Hamford. Mike Hamford. I have to name seven birthday boys. That's really good. You get a point if you can name the seven birthday boys as well. Oh, shit. Bat Koalik? Bat Koalik.

That's good. Tim Hortons. Kelpakis. That's good. Dave's Hot Chicken Ferguson. How about Jeff Mutton? Really good. Smart.

Smart one. Who's that other one? Me? Oh, yeah. Piss Van Arsdalen. Drink a lot of fluids. You got to take a big old piss. What about the birthday cake boys?

There's not one for me, huh? That's good. How about that's really good. How about get to point? Birthday Poe Boys. That's good. I used to work at Poe Boys. Did you really?

Where was the Poe Boys located? Across the street from Medieval Times. Wow. Orange County. Did you get a lot of runoff from people going post-show or pre-show? Runoff pussy, you mean? Yeah, yeah. Fuckin' eatin' that Medieval Times tourist pussy.

Which is funny, because when we went to Pirates of Intervention, we were like, you guys must clean up, and they were like, yeah, we get fucked together, didn't we? Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Wait, wait. No, that was also the Black Knight at Medieval Times. Same thing, yeah.

But didn't we all go to the Pirate thing together once? I know Rust was there. And we did. We did. It might have been Medieval, maybe it was Medieval Times, but we did do that. We did the Pyro one together, I remember, because Rust was there.

Rust loved it, as I recall. But that was, yeah, across the street from there is where I worked. It's kind of a, so that's very funny place to work. It's quite the spot. There was a big train running around the entire restaurant. Wow. Yeah. And we had to say, would you care for a belly washer instead of a drink?

That's cute. And we had to say, howdy folks. Did you serve, did you serve like, null and style po-boys? No, I don't think they had po-boys. They had, but we did have hush puppies, stuff like that. It was called po-boys, but didn't sell po-boys. That's wild. But it was more like we were, it was for poor people, I guess.

Interesting. It was like poor Southern food, but, you know, affordable. But it wasn't really affordable. It was like, you know, I don't know. They should have had po-boys, but it's okay. I won't get mad about this now. Because we have to keep playing the game. Emma, what is the next show?

Earth to Ned. Wait, no one knew, you didn't make, you didn't make a pun on me. Oh, Spike to Mitchell, like a spike string. Sprite Mitchell. Sprite Mitchell is good too. I like Sprite more. Scott gets the point. I gave you both points.

Earth to Ned. What's that? That's a show I worked on. Who are you? You know me. I'm the burger boy. I worked, that was Disney plus show I worked on with, actually with the Jim Ensign company.

It was called Earth to Ned. There was a big puppet named Ned. It's like a fucking giant alien. And it was a talk show that people liked, but not a lot of people watched. Mitch to bed after watching the show. We know, so we only know the title of the show, so we have to make it, we have to make a...

Honestly, I worked on the show, and I don't know if I could name any character. Earth to Ned. Jerk. How about Bina Carano? She was, Gina Carano was a guest. That's good. That episode's I'm sure is still online.

We never released our Dough Boys episode either. Did she do it? Oh. It was, we had her scheduled right after Rob Lowe, and then we never released. All right, how about to catch up Predator? To catch up Predator. Catch, to catch up Predator.

Yeah, oh my gosh. Mitch, that was gorgeous. Who's that guy? Oh, Chris, uh... Oh, you. No, you were the one. Oh, yeah, I remember him from that episode. Chris Hansen's Soda?

Yeah. That's good. Piss Hansen. Piss Hansen, yeah. Second of May, of course, after you drink. All of that. All of what you do. All of that Hansen Soda.

It's so hard, because there's really only one cast member on that show, and he's the only cast member on the show that's on the show. And he's the only cast member on the show that's on the show. And he's the only one cast member on that show, and he's the fucking star. Yeah. How about the Sopranos?

Oh, now, this is... Hey, there we go, here we go. There we go, here we go. Yeah. Already something. Oh, I'm sorry, I do. No, you guys don't. Yeah, we don't know.

No, that's sick. Rigatoni Soprano. That's good. It's already short for that, though, isn't it? I think it is, yeah. Yeah. Caramello Soprano. Mm-hmm.

That's good. Um... Yeah. Chris Moltasalti. That's good. What did Chris Hansen used to say? You'll remember this, Nick. What does he say to you when he catches you?

Sit down for a second. Sit down, yeah, I have a seat over there. I have a seat over there. I have a seat over there. Yeah. Okay. Has anyone ever been like, nope? I think it could have been you and just, like, bolted.

Yeah, I'm always amazed that that's another situation. People are doing the show and, like, signing waivers. I can't believe it. What did you do? What did I do? Yeah, that's an area when... Yeah, when he asked you to sit down. I was like, hey, buddy, excited Chad.

You're online with me, right? Thought you were 13. Has anyone ever offered the defense of, I knew it was you and I just want to be on TV? I'm sure that's happened. Weigher got out of it because the court believed that he did just want to look at, like, Pokemon cards. He just had the same taste as the 15-year-old.

You have a podcast about video games? Yeah, you can go. Yeah, he just wanted to be friends with a teenager. Silver Wario Dante? Yeah. Yeah. No, that's good. Steve Amheiser Buscemi?

That's good. That's really good. That's really good. Ba-da-bing! My microwave dinner is done. That's a, that's a pretty big sentence. I'm gonna fucking count on hashtag wars. Did you write on that midnight?

I did. I worked with you a few times. I think you did. Yeah. Yeah. You're always, you're always very easy to, easy going to work with. Oh, that's nice of you to say. But some people were like very high stress and or very like.

It is a stressful situation. It was a stressful situation, but you were always like, you know, very professional. I've talked about this to Nick. Yeah. But I was on with Bob and Hanford. We, when the birthday boys came out, they were nice enough to have us on.

And I, I like, they were like, Bob's going to win. Sorry to break the hearts of everyone that thinks that. And then, and they were like, you're going to get eliminated first to me. And then at the end, it was, they had eliminated Hanford. It was me versus Bob. And I knew Bob's final answer. I was like, I'm going to beat Bob.

So you said Bob's final answer? No, no, I knew, I, I just knew you were going to. I just knew I was going to win because I was like, I think I picked a funnier thing. Oh, wow. And I, and I was like, I'm going to win and I won. And Bob was like, oh, everybody, congrats on winning the fake thing that doesn't matter.

Yeah. And he was kind of like, what? He won? He was kind of confused by it. And then immediately forgot about it. Yeah, yeah. The second to the end. Doesn't remember that we did that.

I think the first time I was on, I took it really seriously and like worked on all of the questions beforehand. Yeah. And then I was like, oh, you don't have to do this. Yeah. Because you guys were great and had really funny stuff that I didn't feel embarrassed.

God bless you. Because going in, you don't know who's working out. Exactly. And you're sort of like, oh, I should do my own stuff. Yeah. But yeah. Yeah. It was fun.

Are you working on the new one? No. We're all blindsided by it. Blindsided. Hashtag blindsided. Yeah. Wow. Yeah.

Survivor. I was trying to think of an at midnight one. Yeah. That midnight. That midnight. That's good. At midnight snack. At midnight snack.

At midnight snack. That's what I was looking for. Weigars crushing. Yeah, Weigars. At rib bite. All right. Last one. All right.

You want one more? I mean, do we need a last one? Yeah. Last one. Yeah. Well, yeah. Let's keep this going. Yeah.

All right. Last one. This is basically is. This is like, Amelia has reinvented hashtag wars. But just been like, hey, just do it on the spot. It really is exactly what used to happen on that show. Yes. Yeah.

Without the conferring with writers beforehand. Yeah. Here's a topic. Make a bunch of fun. Yes. This is the real. This is the real version of that. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Exactly. Did you want to have an eat? How's that for Chris Hansen? Hey, you want to have it? Oh, that's really good. There you go. Thank you.

There you go. All right. You guys can choose between real time with Bill Meyer or young Sheldon. I feel like we got to do young Sheldon at this point. Yeah. I mean, I know nothing about the show, but. Young egg Sheldon? Young, I was going to say crab Sheldon.

Oh, that's good too. That's better. I don't know that it's better. It's pretty much the exact same, isn't it? Try to get something like a bubble pews. You're being too generous. It's clearly better, but that's an issue to say. I'm trying to get something with like Olympic pubes.

Come Sheldon? Come Sheldon? What? Why did you say that? Because something you eat? I don't know why you said that either. The food aspect is there. You eat cum?

And? I, you can eat anything. Yeah. You don't have to. Well, we're talking about eating pussy early. What, we could eat pussy and not eat cum? What are we talking about? All right.

I don't, did I agree to be on this? I asked to be on this. I'm more like castigating you for making the exact joke I would make. I don't, I literally don't know anyone on, besides Jim Parsons and Sheldon. Yeah. I don't know anyone on. Yeah, there's.

Slim Jim Parsons. Yeah. Have people called him that? I wonder. Probably. He is slim. He's a slender man. He's a slender man.

Is he slender man? He might be. He might be slender man. It's a possibility that Jim Parsons is slender. Have they lined up like his alibi? Yeah, where was he during the slender man signings? During all the slender man murders. I don't know.

He was filming, supposedly. Oh, filming the normal heart. He like arrives at the set and he's all bloody. It's like, oh, you're already in your makeup for the normal heart. This AIDS drama. Great. And he's like, oh, phew. I just killed someone as the slender man.

And no one's going to know this. I wonder if they'll go over that with Young. I guess, I guess Young Sheldon isn't really about Jim Parsons. So. It should be. I think it could, it could just like segue into being about Jim Parsons. I agree with that. In season eight or whatever.

Yeah, why not? People would go like, oh, yeah, I get it. Jim Parsons. He starts going on auditions. Parsons is good. Parsons, yes. That would be like, if eventually Young Sheldon becomes Young Parsons, and then we see Young Parsons booking the role that will be Sheldon in a Big Bang Theory.

There'd be like a good four seasons of him like, you know, going to his agent and giving sides to Xeroxed. Because it was probably before emails. I'm going to go read for Michael Scott on the office. I don't know, let's see if this happens. Didn't get that one, but he got the Big Bang Theory. Did he read for Michael Scott on the office? I don't know.

He should have. He should have. Man. What do we get? He would have been so good. Yeah. Can you imagine? He would have been good.

That's what she said. I auditioned for Michael Scott. For Kathy Bates' nephew on the office. Oh, really? And I got the very nice compliment when I was done of that was well memorized. Wow. One of the, one of the things that you're really looking to hear post-audition was that was that well memorized.

And that's what I got. Wow. One of my last auditions, I don't do it anymore. I'm offer only. And I will not memorize lines, by the way. I just choose to riff and that's in my contract. But I got the compliment of, wow, you're a really good actor. And I was like, since then I've thought, was that sarcastic?

Yeah. That's insane. If, well. That'd be really mean. I've said this on the podcast before, but I don't know if you know this, but I went in for the descendants. I don't know if I ever said what the movie is. The Rob Hubel part?

Or? I don't know. I don't think it was the Rob. I think it was another part in it that. Shailene Woodley. Maybe, maybe it was, maybe it was, but the Hubel part, but uh. Probably not. I don't think the ages would have lined up.

The casting director told me that he wanted to claw his eyes out. Oh. That's what he said. Yeah. I auditioned for Frasier. Did you really? Early on. Oh, oh, shit.

Early on in the run. Wow. And the casting director told me it was horrible. And he's like. Oh my god. He was like, what are you, you can't come in here and be that bad or something to that effect. Why are they so mean? I don't know.

To what end? Doesn't make any sense. Sounds like early morning wiger. Early morning wiger on my mind. All right. You just punched the TV. Well, that was a thrilling conclusion. What a game.

I mean, a wagger crush. She got 28 points. Yeah. This is built for what? Scott had 20 and Mitch had 16. We all did well. We all did great. Everyone did well.

Great puns. It's quantity not quality. Yeah. Puns aren't my like big comedy thing. I'm still kind of searching for what my comedy thing is, but. You'll get there. I'm going to get there at some point. Yeah.

By the way, speaking of puns, buns. There you go. The bun game. Right there. All right. So hold on a second. You were giving a points for things like that? No.

Because if so. I just wrote down the bun game to remember it for later. It should be called the bun game now. And then everyone goes, what game is this? And then she's got to go, well, it's the pun game. Yeah. But it's a pun on bun. But it's a pun on bun.

And everyone goes, oh, right. It's always better when you have to explain it. Well, Scott, I don't think there's much left to say except sorry. We got to do it. We got to do your email time. We have a feedback. Just like restaurant, call your feedback. Let's open up the feedback.

And we have a voicemail today. Emma, this is going to play that for us. I think it was good to apologize in advance anyways. Yeah. Yeah, okay. There you go. Hey, I'm Hailey, a big fan of the Doughboys. Hashtag Food Nation.

My question is this. Christ's blood and body is represented by wine and crackers. What food and beverage would you pick to represent your blood and body? Thank you so much. Bye. That's good. Wow. Scott, we've talked about religion before on the show.

This is a Christian podcast. You would pick CUM, obviously. Pick CUM. For the body. Yeah. Yeah, the blood. So you learned about that answer. To represent the body is CUM.

CUM Parsons. Was that what it was? CUM Parsons is good. Was that what you said? I thought that's what it was. No, it was CUM Sheldon. CUM Sheldon. Oh, I'm sorry.

Honestly, if they changed the title, who would notice? The ratings would not drop off. We wouldn't keep watching CUM Sheldon. Steady ratings. Yeah. Like, oh, wow, this thing is like fucking Yellowstone. Just every TV in America is tuned to it. Well, also, there's no theme song to TV shows anymore.

So literally, who would notice? Yeah, no one would notice. No one would notice. Other than a listing, when you turn on your TV, it would be down in the left-hand corner, CUM Parsons. Yeah. Or whatever, CUM Sheldon. CUM Sheldon's starting CUM Parsons.

Yeah, why? It just changes to CUM Parsons now. There would be a Mandela effect of like, did this show used to be called Young Parsons? Young Sheldon? Young Parsons. No, no, it's always called CUM Sheldon. Dude, trust me.

I saw this thing, this image of a young Sheldon, like, bus ad. It's like, that's AI. I think I used to watch it because it was a younger version of this Sheldon character. No, no, no. It's always been. Always been CUM Parsons.

What does this mean? Why did I start watching this show called CUM Parsons? I mean, it's good. I like it. The jokes haven't changed at all, but wow. Oh, man. By the way, I ran into a couple of Doughboys listeners on the way out of the mall.

I didn't say this. Oh, that's lovely. And one was very. Have they watched the movie as well, or they were just in the mall? They had watched, they were behind me in John Wick 4, which I had no idea. And then one of the two was wearing,

she was wearing a gabris, the high might. Wow, how about that? I'm going to say for me, the blood, I think would be have to be something like a little bit more. It wouldn't be wine. It would be a little bit something more thicker, you know, a little bit more thick. Right.

Like gravy? Gravy's good. I was thinking more like a cola, some sort of cola. Oh, sure. You're a Coca-Cola classic. I'm a Coca-Cola. And you know what? Red, it is red labeled.

So that could work. It's got red branding. But also like, maybe syrup would work too. You know what I mean? Like maple syrup. Right. But I'll go Coca-Cola classic. From the main syrup.

It sounds like you are intentionally, because you're saying syrup. Syrup. Syrup. But it sounds like you're intentionally trying to pronounce it correctly. Like you spend a lot of time when you say it. This is true.

You know, I mean, when I had it, I used to have a Boston accent, which I think that I still. You still do. Kind of do. It's just not as pronounced as when. No, it's not. No, I don't, I, it's kind of, you kind of have the Ben Affleck of it all,

where like you can slip back into it. There's one thing of Ben Afflecks I don't have, which is. Fucking pipe. He's, we watched. He's got a fucking power tool. We watched her on girl and he's. Yeah, yeah.

I still don't think, I still don't agree with you. Honestly, we can just say this is what the fight was about. I don't agree with you that it's quote unquote gigantic. I think it's big. I think it looks good. Well, look, I read the texts in one of the breaks. And for you, Mitch, to say that his snake is as big as the snake his wife faced off in and, and a condom is like,

I don't know that I would go with you on. I think it's that big. I think she should be scared anytime they try to attempt to make love. Okay. All right. Ice cubes like there's snakes out there that's big. Yeah, there are. Fucking Affleck's trousers.

Do you think that when people watch the 400th episode, I have like tears in my eyes to think that it's a fight about Ben Affleck's heart. Because you guys both agree it was huge. I think it's big. You thought it was a little bigger than he thought. I said, I think it's gigantic. I don't go that I don't know that far. I feel like gigantic is a high bar.

Gigantic I reserve for like a porno. We could show you the video of it. We both do have the video of it, but we won't get into it. Yeah, we don't need to do it. It's pretty gigantic. For flacepidin, it's pretty gigantic. And then for my looking good for my body. I think I go with marshmallows.

Coke and marshmallows. Do you like marshmallows that much? No, not at all. Do you think it's more representative of you? Oh, you know what? Oh, fuck. You know what? I think I would just go with I think I would just choose a better bread than Jesus chose.

I think I would get like a nicer fluffier because I think that's fun. I think bread is a good choice. Yeah. Well, did he choose that bread or did we choose it for? I think we guess I guess we I guess he didn't really lay out a map for the bread part of it. Well, he did say this is my body and he broke apart. Yeah, yeah. Was it unleavened bread because they were all I think maybe it was unleavened bread,

which is kind of I don't understand that about religion of like denying you things that make things taste good. I think there's an element of because a lot of times religion is codifying something that is to somebody's benefit. And we're saying like God is commanding this and I think in probably in an environment of scarcity rules like there's no meat on Friday is like a way to conserve things, but to enforce it through some sort of doctrine that God doesn't want. Exactly. Yeah. And I think it's the same sort of thing.

But I was reading that. Yeah, just speaking with this, yeah, on Fridays, I was reading about like people going to opening day for baseball and not being able to order hot dogs and stuff because it's a Friday. It's like, come on, guys. That's a chick. There's a chick playing in Atlanta in the Mercedes Benz Stadium. There's a chick filet, which is not open on Sundays, which is so Sundays is when like that's when the games happen. That's when the games happen on Sundays.

So no one's going to no one's. It's just close. It's in the stadium. Close. I think that bread is actually kind of a good choice. Wow. So you're going like you're going Coke and a quality bread. Yeah. I mean, like I would rather have pizza. I'd rather make, you know what? I got it. Cheesy stuffed bread from Domino's. Wow. That's fun. That's so Coke and the cheesy stuffed bread from Domino's.

Is Detroit style pizza a let down? No, I think it absolutely fucking delivers. We went. Wait, are you saying this? Having had it fucking great. I've had it recently from a few places and I've always been like, it looks better than it tastes. Are you having it in LA like the LA approximation of Detroit pizza? I think if you get Detroit style pizza in Detroit, it'll be like this fucking ribs.

I know the first time I had Detroit style pizza was on tour when we were opening for a comedy bang bang on tour in Detroit. In Detroit. Yeah. I don't remember that show. I remember the show where you guys went to the SNL after party and barely got on the train. Yes. To Boston. To Boston. And then you were on the show in Boston, which was very,

it was a very nice experience. With your parents. Our show got messed up tech-wise in my hometown. And my mom brought a bunch of people to it. Yes. Oh, I forgot about that. And they were like, we came to see this. And so I was like, Mitch, come on out and be on the regular comedy bang show. I've appreciated that forever.

It was lovely gesture. Yeah. And then they saw me flop around up there. You were funny. So you're going with coconut and cheesy bread from Domino's. I am going to say, I'm kind of surprised you didn't pick this bitch. I'm not going to take your pick for the cracker portion. But I was thinking fries. And I'm going to say Arby's Curly Fries.

Yours are my crackers. I was thinking you might want them McDonald's fries. McDonald's fries. But I'll take Arby's Curly Fries. And for the wine, I'm tempted to just say wine. Because I can be something of a wine mom. But in the interest of this, since I am trying to consciously drink less, I have a lot of fun having a Heineken Zero.

Unconsciously drink more. Yeah. I really like a Heineken Zero. Really? That's a true treat for me. So I'll say, oh, or should I say coffee? I do love black coffee. I got to have my coffee first thing in the morning when I wake up.

So this is kind of just turning into like an AA meeting. Black coffee or non-alcoholic beer. Non-alcoholic beer. Donuts and coffee. Yeah. Yeah. Donuts and coffee is really fucking good. Is that yours?

No, I was going to go a blue moon. Oh, that's smart. Light sky, perhaps. Mainly because they're a sponsor of my podcast. Oh, that's nice. And it just sent me a whole bunch. Wow. It was nice to crack one open.

It truly is my favorite beer, and I've said that on the spots. Blue moon, Emma. Sorry, because we're still doing puns on actual food now. I mean, buns. Yeah. But I agree with Mitch, though, a nice quality bread. Like anytime you go to a restaurant and they bring out bread, it's like, you're like, oh my god, I should have some of this at home.

It's such a good treat, and we never think to just have nice bread at home. So maybe a nice sour dough. That's fun. Like the more sour the better. I want it like a sweet tart. Wow. I'm with you. I want a really sour bread.

Yeah. And I spit it out after I eat it. I'm just like, this is disgusting. Yeah, like a warhead, basically. Yeah. I think that, I'm presuming that's a sour candy. It is a sour candy. Is the, was the warhead the hot one or were they, what was the?

I think they were super sour. They might have done some like cinnamon spicy ones. Maybe it was a sour head that was a sour one. Casey, a hot one. Have you guys done a crossover episode with hot ones? No, we're not famous enough. Yeah, hot ones really took off to the point where we're, I don't think that we could ever be on it.

There was a threshold when we could have been on it, but now when they're like, yeah, we've got like, you know, Christina Ricci on it or whatever. Yeah, why would they ever? Yeah, why would they have the dough boys on? Maybe if Mitch blows up career-wise, we could see that happening. Oh, thank God you said career-wise afterwards. I was nervous for a second.

If Mitch blows himself up, you'll get famous enough from the news stories. Yeah, yeah. Hey, you worked with this guy for several years. Did you know, was he a taking time bomb? Literally. Yeah. Did you know Mr. Creosote could happen in real life? Sort of.

So you like ate dynamite, is that what? Mr. Creosote just ate too much. They explode. Yes. Okay. He's like a waffer thin, right? Is that, yeah. Yeah, I think my scenario is like it's a dynamite stick on like a thing of bread.

Can I say, I love Monty Python. I am a huge fan. There was a thing my dad got into. He was really into like British comedy, even though he's American and I watched a lot of it as a kid. I never found that particular scene to be funny, even though I like watching it. Because I was like, this is just disgusting and depraved

and the guy exploding is like an amazing spectacle. But it never really worked for me as a sketch. You know, what the fuck do I know? No. Yeah, no, I'm with you. It's kind of just gross. It's kind of just gross, right? Yeah.

I mean, it's no, this man cave is more like a man's grave. Which is a sketch that Nick wrote, which is probably the most famous comedy bang bang sketch. Wow. God bless you. Did I ever give you any notes on it or was it a fully sailed through? I think that was first draft straight to set. Sometimes they just come out good like that.

I think of the warning on the money was when I had on Mr. Showers, just first draft straight through. Yeah. It's just like, you know, they come out good sometimes. And that's that simple. And then sometimes you got to do, I remember like having Calpacus do sometimes like a 16th draft because I was like daring him to do one without any errors. Yes.

And then we'd get to an error. He would go, this one is perfect. Then we'd get to an error and I would always point out there and he'd go, fucking shit. You were, yeah, you're really adamant about no goose for a time, no flubs in the script. And I remember there was also like, there's something I worked on you with and if you found anything that displeased you in a script, you'd say it was going straight to the dump. This was like me and Joe Saunders and Hanford were working on this and you reached a point

and you just like find a typo and like Saunders script like, the dump. I mean, you do stuff like that just to fuck around. Raise spirits. I don't really give a shit about typos, just to make that clear. It's like something to do. It's a lot like podcasting. Yes. It's a lot like doing that game that we just played.

Exactly. The buns. It's something to do. It's something to do. You got to fill some time. I wrote a sketch called Frog Pope and then Bob did the opposite where it was about like there's smoke that's like showing the whatever, Sistine Chapel. I don't know where the fuck, but the smoke comes out for the pope.

Yeah, right. The white smoke. It's black and then it's white and then it's green and then you just see a little frog come onto the balcony and I wrote that and then one day Bob is like, all right, let's figure out Frog Pope. And I was like, no, we're not going to figure this out. He's very generous that way of like, what's your initial idea? Why did you find funny about it?

Maybe we can turn it into something. Yes. And he was like, what if he tried to blow it out to her? It was like, what if this is like a bigger thing like where Mitch writes this and it's bad? And I was like, no, let's not do this. Although in my submission pack for Packet, for Mr. Show, there were like four good sketches and then one he just wrote, crazy man. I was like, oh, I understand.

You think this has no future? Yeah. Hey, let us know what you'd have for your wine and crackers. Hashtag me, Christ. And if you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, you can email us at don'tboyspodcasts at gmail.com or leave us a voice melody. That was the exercise. If you were Christ, what would represent your blood and body?

That was somehow more confusing than cum Parsons, honestly. Why am I watching the show cum Parsons? Don'tboyspodcasts at gmail.com. Leave us a voicemail at 830 Godot. That's 830-46-36-844. And to get the Don't Boys double or weekly bonus episode, join the Golden or Platinum Play Club at patreon.com slash Don't Boys. Scott Ockerman, comedy bang bang.

People know the podcast. Now they'll get to know comedy bang bang, the podcast, The Book, holding it up there for the camera. Holding it up for the camera, Nick, you wrote some stuff for this. Caroline Anderson collabed on a piece in this. Yes. And it's essentially people say like, oh, what is the book? Is it a transcription of bits you've done on the podcast or anything?

No. It's all new material that people who do characters on the podcast, they wrote pieces for it. As the characters, it's filled with things like games and pamphlets and posters and essays. Nick, you have the number one comedy bang bang character of all time according to Vulture. Yes. Vulture made like a listicle years ago. And then people like get mad at me about it.

I was like, I don't know what to do with this. Although I think, I don't know, you probably had something to do behind the scenes. I think. You were emailing Vulture at like really positioning yourself. Yeah, I was like, you don't want to see what will happen if I'm not number one. You did essentially the Wikipedia article for your character. That's right. Leo Karpotzi of The Monster Mash.

And then we mentioned Harris. There's a section in the back devoted to Foam Corner and the story behind that is basically we contacted Stephanie, his sister, who had his phone. Oh, wow. And we were like, do you mind like going into his notes app and like sending us notes app? And she was like, I don't think I want to do it, but she had her husband do it. And so he just went through Harris's notes app and found any jokes.

That's wild. And sent them. And so we put them all into the book. So it's like kind of, because I feel like a lot of his standup was never recorded, you know? Yes, right. So basically it's like the definitive list of his jokes. That's awesome. Yeah.

Wow. That's right. That's great. Oh, worth buying for that alone. Yeah. Everyone check it out. Check it out. And hey, that dude for the submission.

Yeah. I wanted to do his DS and there's some good stuff on that DS too. Oh, yeah. Oh, wow. Save it for the next volume. Did you find, did her husband find the text Harris sent me when he was at Disneyland? And I said, hey, get your dick sucked on Space Mountain. And he replied, classic Tex, Nick, six times in a row.

Was that, that must have been because he was in a place with spotty service. That's my guess. He did it once and it just like sent it six times, like retrying, retrying, retrying. Yeah. Yeah. Good stuff. Good times. Hey, that'll do it for this episode of Doe Boys.

Until next time, for the Spoonman, Mike Mitchell, I'm Nick Weigher, happy eating. See ya. On the next Doe Boys double. May is Mank. That's right. May is Mank. All May long, it's Mank. Tune in to find out what that means next week on Patreon.com slash Doe Boys.

That's Patreon.com slash Doe Boys. Mank. Mank. Sources for the intro are in the episode description.