DRINNIES - Kimmenjuck

Episode Date: September 16, 2024

Schloss Bellwitz lädt ein: Im Bundesministerium für Humor wird feierlich die hauseigene Schoko-Conche eingeweiht! Mit dabei: Kalte Eier, La Depressión und der 1-Personen-Fahrstuhl. Eine neue Rubrik gibt es auch! Durchhalten!Besuche Giulia und Chris auf Instagram: @giuliabeckerdasoriginal und @chris.sommerHier findest du alle Infos und Rabatte unserer Werbepartner: linktr.ee/drinnies Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Drenys, the podcast from the comfort zone. Hello and welcome to a new episode of Drenys. We hope you're doing well and if not, it's okay. Julia, I greet you very warmly for this new episode. Episode 185, if I counted correctly. Crazy. So many episodes. I think, Chris, you always notice that you have the inner urge to speak Cologne, but you're breaking out yourself.

I mean, it's a bit Cologne-ish, but you're breaking out yourself, because I think you'd go all-in, all-in, like a hen, with an onion beard. You'd be really welcome. I can't do it on command, and then it's not a parody. You can't do it if you can't do it on command. That's my credo. That's why I'm holding myself back and waiting for it to really happen. Did the parody ministry decide that?

The Federal Ministry for Parody and Humor. I dream of that. A real line, a big office, a real complex, to rent out old state property somewhere, then the Federal Ministry of Humor, and then maybe the Department of Parody, we could open up. You know what I want?

I have no idea what that is, but I really want to have a dependency. I want to have a dependency in a place where you don't expect something like Eindhoven. I have a dependency in the Netherlands, in Eindhoven. Yes, that's good. For our Federal Ministry of Parody and Humor. A summer seat. I have a dependency in the Netherlands, in Eindhoven. That's good. For our Federal Ministry for Parody and Humor.

A summer seat. Actually a summer seat. Julia Becker, chairperson of the Federal Ministry for Humor. In the Bellwitz castle. Yes, exactly. You can then also take over the Karlauer department directly. Yes, exactly. That's my Karlauer from A to M.

Exactly. And then we have to be a bit refined within the ministry. And I always go in front of the media and say, with the Karlauer department we have nothing to do with it, that's a whole other sector. We don't even eat together at the table. We sit three tables away. The Karlauers are laughing all the time and we make the important jokes.

Exactly. And from time to time you really have to invite someone from the private sector, Stefan Raab, and ask him how he actually built the stairs, so that you can just learn again. What's going on with the stairs now? That's the question. With the Recycled AW learn. What's happening with the stairs? The recycled AWB, let's see where it goes. I thought we should make a message. A message abroad to bring the world-famous German humor abroad.

Maybe with a message and then also consulates. It's not enough to make a message in Paris, we need a consulate general in Nancy, for example. A consulate general, a depot. And then I would also make a competition to the Goethe-Institut. Because it's important that you make competition with the foundation of the general will. It's important that you then say to one person,

Goethe-Institut, but we're going to make Schiller-Institut. And then we put more money in there and then they can see who's coming to their readings. We have the Harald Schmidt Foundation, but we also have the Stefan Raab Foundation, which is a bit of an enemy. The Stefan Raab Foundation has great sponsors, you always get energy drinks.

And shower heads and stuff. But only Karlauer. We also have a nice foyer in this federal property at the Federal Ministry of Humor. And we have different departments, too. Parody, comedy, cabaret, cabaret with a pointer, too. Cabaret with leather jacket. Exactly, cabaret, which is actually tarnished for legal propaganda. And then there's a foyer, which is important to me,

where we have a lobby. In Switzerland, it's called the Federal House of the lobby. And that's where the lobby comes together. So we have Brainpool, then we have ZDFneo, and then they say, can you do a sitcom where the title is so cohesive? That's important to us. Then Brainpool, we want to produce something

for Join, which nobody is looking at anyway. Oh, now I'm doing it. Join is great, ZDFneo is great, Brainpool, super cool company. All great, we're all excited. But Chris, for me, one thing is important. I don't want to be responsible for the department where people are making the teacher humor.

So teachers, sons and daughters, or teachers themselves, or have been, I'm telling you something from the so-called red pen world. I don't want to be responsible for that. I want to transfer this responsibility to you or a third party. That's actually the Martin-Rytharization Germany. I've already mentioned that every business unit, every private business industry has a comedy department.

You could actually... What is it? How do you call it? A branch comedy. So, a dog trainer does comedy, the cook does comedy. We have a star chef, the teacher does comedy. There are always guys, the teacher does comedy. And then we have a copy room where it says, comedy with women. For me, it's a bit too unspecified, the professions.

So, dog trainer and teacher, that's an all-world profession. I have to say that many people do that. That's why it's so popular. But for example, if you go into the onions, as you say, if you let the dentist staff do humor, that's a branch of humor. Go specifically into the vacuum cleaner, in the toothbrush mouthwash vacuum cleaner. That's the toothbrush, mouthwash, vacuum.

There are a few gags to write about. That's also demanding, it's difficult to use. For example, half-boss industry comedy. I don't see that represented enough. You've seen in New York that there's a bar where stand-up comedy is about ETFs. Only about ETFs? Only about ETFs.

A party every week or once or twice a month. So a party where there's ETF comedy. Yeah, you can only be there with Bitcoin. Really, yes. You can eat there, pizza, burger, everything. But you can only be there with Bitcoin. Yeah, well, I have almost respect for that. I have to say that.

So it would be important for me, exactly, a lobby. So lobbyism, lobbyism. People come, want money, give me money, so I can somehow speak up for the Bundestag. But also that we have prominent representatives at some point. People who come from politics and say, I have enough of everything, I'm going into private business. And then they suddenly become the boss of Brainpool or something.

You know, that we also have something like Gerhard Schröder. That he suddenly hangs in with Gazprom. That would be so funny if someone from Gerhard Schröder could that he's suddenly in the cast. That would be so funny, if someone from Gerhard Schröder would say, I'm fed up with politics, I'm making comedy now! And then the comeback, like Jan Hofer. He's so serious, and the serious journalist, the daily news, in the suit, everyone crying, a nice evening, ladies and gentlemen.

And then suddenly, I'm like, hey, here's Jan Hofer and I'm doing Let's Dance with it. And I'm wearing a glitter suit. You know, a comeback that nobody expects, but in the wrong direction. You mean we could do a program for people who want to be super serious. And then like the sad clown. So, outwardly always very serious, but internally super funny. So, actually the sad clown in reverse. The sad clown is extremely funny, but internally super funny. So actually the sad clown is the other way around. The sad clown is extremely funny, internally he's crying.

That's how satiricals like to describe themselves. But with politicians it's the other way around. But inside it's really funny. One Karla and another Markus Krebs, they hit one after the other. Hey guys, last time I was at the hairdresser, do you know that when you sit there and have to do a small talk, then his hair falls into the camera? Hey, guys, last time I was at the hairdresser, you know that when you sit there and have to do small talk, then he falls into the trap. But Chris, I really like the idea

that we have our own ministry, and for several, for many reasons, I'd almost say. And first of all, we had our own lettering paper, right? Yes. But really state-of-the-art, the thick paper, the good one, not the thin one that you already fold in your hand, but really thick, what which is crumpled. Where you write something on it with a pencil.

We would have something like that, at the cost of the state, on tax money, on the state's neck. And then I would say, we could also, well, for that, the ministries are there, they are institutions that serve to hide scandals. And we could do that in a big style, like the mass scandal or something, we could then have the letter paper scandal.

Exactly, we actually have an independent, like a vaccination commission, there is the independent humor commission, but then it is discovered that it is actually paid somehow and then the people are also exchanged. Exactly, the humor commission recommends more pumpkin jokes this year. And then you have to take that as a guide for the stand-up comedy. But then it turns out that we, the independent Humor Commission,

from the Federal Ministry of Humor, have recommended pumpkin jokes. And why? Because we are giving away pumpkin for free. Because we didn't check that you can't eat all the pumpkins at the same time. And they will rot in our garden. But what we would also have would be the Karlauer Arbeitskreis. They always have workplaces, right? I've never seen politics, especially not on a communal level, but on a federal level,

what kind of unions, unions, workplaces, this and that. You don't understand what's going on. Every day in other constellations they sit together. And that's how it would be for us. And we'd be playing with a mess, we'd be forming so many working circles and groups, you wouldn't even know where's up and down. I grew up in a country that was very federalistic, Switzerland, and we have to do that too.

There's no more the Federal Ministry of Humor, there's the Ministry of the State for Humor, there's old people who have already made a joke too much. Like Armin Laschet. They're being And then the old people say, we used to do it like this, a joke can be over a minute long, why should we change it? The country is going to the ground. And then there are really intense debates. And the people say, no, it has to go faster, Jen Z needs short jokes,

and the old people want a really long setup. Exactly, that doesn't tell anymore, it's written differently. The paper also smells different than the displays. And then there are those who are against everything, they are for little, but against a lot. They want to introduce Sütterli again. Exactly, those who say we only need humor on record. Cabaret on record.

Humor on Steno. Exactly. Your principle is, if you can't make it into a Steno, it's no joke. I love our ministry already. We would have a lot of talks about ideas. Simply because we want to give jobs to people. Because we have the money on our neck. And then we could just hire people. For example a chocolatier.

We would have a chocolatier. The one from the lint ad with the big white hat? And then we would have in the basement of the ministry we would have the Korsch cheese. Do you know that? Yes, the Korsch cheese. What is that? A swing-box

where chocolate is being swinged until the butter is soft. I always wonder at the Lindt ad white clothes, white hat, huge hat, right? Is he actually also at the hot air balloon festival with this hat? It's not even close. He's a hot-headed guy, where the heat rises into the cooking hat

and then he lifts off, I always think like that. And you ask me, white clothes in the chocolate, mega-unbeneficial, so difficult, right? So you get the brown sauce all day. But you know what I think is so crazy? But the the the the the

the the the the the They have a conch. Nobody knows what it is, if it really exists. They could have just invented it and said, we're the only company with a conch, but it doesn't exist. And I always think, oh, that's something nice, it comes from the conch. And that's why I'd like to have a conch in our ministry.

The only federal ministry with a house-owned conch. But I do agree that the federal ministry for humor is friendly. I would say we make it as complicated as ministries are. I do agree that the Federal Ministry of Humor is also friendly. I would say we do it as complicated as ministries are. Everything only in writing, no calls. Or calls only between 11 and 11.30, daily. Otherwise there are no slots. And then everything with elaborate postcards.

Every single Pranta, every punchline is sealed as postcard. And then we have a huge archive. And then exactly one archivist who has to take care of it. But she knows every joke. She's actually the funniest person. But she can only present herself very soberly. As an archivist, she has to keep her head up. She knows every joke, but can only present herself very soberly.

That's why it doesn't work for her with the comedy career. But we would also have the building built. So we would also make it training-friendly. We have a co-location. The ministry is new. We can decide for ourselves. For example, I would say that there are only one-person-elevations. So really small elevations.

Not too small that you really get space anxiety. But so that one person has good space. And everyone knows that I can't get in there now. Yes, but it would also be important that you have an elevator where at least three people have space. Because otherwise you don't find comedy material. Observation, brilliant things Yeah, important would be that you have a lift with at least three people in it. Because otherwise you won't find any comedy material. Observation, brilliant things you've never seen before.

It's important for me that you have enough parking space for all the SUVs from the private channels. That you can drive Jokun Class in it. Otherwise we have a problem. Otherwise we really get lost. If Mario Bart can't drive through the closet with his 911 Porsche, then he'll get hit by a lot of things. We have a small marble corner in the parking lot,

if the owner wants to come by. In the Catholic Church, there's a parallel society, they have their own court, where they banish people from the church. If you're a teacher and you get a divorce in a Catholic kindergarten, you can be suspended. You can be fired because that's un-Christian. And they have their own court and they decide it before the court,

like a parallel justice. And I would also introduce a trial, the joke court. And we would then vote on individual cases. We would also have the 11 sworn people who would vote for the joke. And for example, something like, yeah, there would be something like people who would say chicken fillet inside as a joke.

That would come to us before the court. And then we would have the Sütterlin-Fraktion who would say, no, that's a brilliant joke, we want to keep it. I definitely want to be the chairman, because I want to have a hammer like that, and I also want to have this hairstyle, this Mozart-hub, I want to put on this Mozart hat

and a really cool tala, I think. A real judge's tala. I'd like to have a little glitter on it. It'd look really fancy. What's already comedy is that I follow the principle. Funny wig, funny outfit, then you don't have to be a good actor. And it's a laugh.

Maybe the wig doesn't turn white, but then you dye it and it's a safe laugh. So, that's working already. Maybe the bridge is not white, but then color it in and then it's really a safe laugh. People will laugh their heads off. Yes, delicious, delicious. What is autumn now? What would the Federal Ministry of Humor propose now? What are the topics? Pyramids of the Coelbos?

Yes, pyramids of the Coelbos, which have already fallen over again. They're not even standing right, they've already fallen over again. But yes, we are in the middle of autumn. It's really cold in the chamber, you have to say. The seasonal depression knocks on the door. Maybe you could introduce that to the Federal Ministry of Humor. I'm kind of in favor of saying, La Depression, a little in Spanish. They say in the Mediterranean it's easier

that maybe psychotherapists only say La Depression. So in the Spanish flair, Mediterranean, that it's at least half a second easier to come up with. So positively connoted. But I also think that we as the federal government should be responsible for helping people with autumn depression. That you maybe say you give out vouchers every day,

a pumpkin spice latte, for people who suffer from autumn depression. That could help, something warm to drink, go out and drink an 8-euro drink for free out and so on. Otherwise an 8 euro drink. That would be the first thing I would introduce. It's not just bad for you, but then you don't have any more money. But for that it smells a bit like pumpkin spice. For that you have five sips, slugs.

I still don't know what the plural is. Slugs? No, slugs. Now make a term for it, my love. Slugs, I think. Yes. We know what you mean. I put on the ABS socks today. Schlucke? Ja, jetzt mach dir mal einen Begriff, meine Liebe. Schlucke, glaube ich. Ja. Na ja, wir wissen, was du meinst, Christ. Ja. Ich hab die ABS-Socken angezogen heute.

Guck mal. Meine ABS-Socken hab ich mir jetzt neu gekauft. Ja, ist auch besser bei der Sturzgefahr hier. Ja. Ich hab auch gedacht, da braucht's Aktionen, Reaktionen. Wie beim Bundesverkehrsministerium. Wenn man irgendwo eine Brücke nicht mehr hält, wie jetzt im Sauerland, Blütenscheid, dann gibt's die Reaktionen, wir müssen sie halt sprengen.

So, das ist... Und so hab ich jetzt ABS-Socken, der Herbst ist da... Ich muss jetzt die Füße wegsprengen. Ich bin ein bisschen sauer aufgestoßen, bei Spotify gab's dann deine Podcast für den Herbst, wo ich mich bisschen angegriffen gefühlt habe, dass wir da nicht aufgelistet worden sind. Das ist, ungelogen, das Schlimmste, was Spotify jemals gemacht hat.

Da bin ich ganz sicher, Chris. Weißt, was ich lange gedacht habe wegen saisonaler Depression? La depression saisonale. I'm completely sure, Chris. You know what I've been thinking about for a long time? Seasonal depression. La depression saisonale. Maybe it helps when you speak a foreign language. At least for half a second. When I thought it's just a bit... It's not about being a bit sad because the leaves are falling down.

You're not depressed because autumn is coming, but autumn is getting rid of what you have in you. If I understand correctly. Right. I think it's still going. Because a time like this is over for me personally. The hot summer is over. And all this jubilant, hecticness, meeting outside all day, in the free park.

And if you don't come along, it's stupid. This time is over, that's good. But it's not that dark yet. And it's not dark in the morning either. That's why this short time is still going well. But it's going downhill now. I'd like to prepare our listeners for that. It's going to get worse every week.

The jokes are more simple, more Kalauer. That's going to happen. Because then it gets dark earlier. In the morning it gets dark, you go to bed, you work, then it gets dark again, and that's what makes you. And I suffer from that a lot. That's why I'd rather go somewhere and be at 20 degrees.

That would be my dream. But I'm here now, do your best, Chris. That's how it is. I don't want to ask when the hottest phase of your depression is. That's a bad wording, I think. I don't think you should ask that. I think the worst is when you think, so for me it's December, Christmas and New Year's are over, and then you think, so now, let's go, new year.

But then it pulls again, right, January, February, and sometimes even March, and it doesn't stop, and it's wet and cold and dark and... Then the house of cards falls, which you have built up from speculations all the months before, in yourself. Yes, and you don't even have the emotional support of the Christmas bakery anymore.

The stuff is no longer sold. That means you have to live three months in this Christmas weather without Christmas mood. So how is that supposed to work? The bill doesn not sold anymore. That means you have to live three months in this Christmas weather without Christmas mood. How is that supposed to work? The bill doesn't open. Yes, so warmth helps too. If it's still cold in winter, even in the apartment, it sucks. It sucks, yes. And I have to remind you again

what we have here with our heating experts, who call themselves, who have lived this week. So I have to take it a little bit on my head, the blame. So I'll explain briefly. We got a flyer, a card, an appointment reminder, from the heating expert. And it says here, if someone wants to read the heating body, appointment.

I come then and then. And I've had it often now, that it really says, 12th, 9th, 8 o'clock, that's it. You can't call. There is no number, no email it. You can't call. There's no number, no email address. That's the other extreme. But I took pictures of it,

because I thought we have to talk about it again. We were finally thrown in by four of the guys. And I took pictures of the fourth one, and I said, that's enough. That's enough, like the Hogwarts letter. It just comes out of all the openings, doors and windows. The basic problem was that we just misunderstood this map. I thought it was an appointment proposal and it comes,

and if you don't want it to come, you have to call the heating expert who is supposed to read the heating body. And it says on this flyer, your heating expert comes on Tuesday, the 10th of September, and then on the top right, an appointment proposal. So I think, okay, I might have to confirm that again, because it's a proposal. But then there's a time frame, 8 o'clock. No time frame, just 8 o'clock. I don't know what the time frame is.

That's a cool time frame. Could of course be 8 o'clock until the end, until around 6 p.m. or... Or until 8 o'clock until the end, so until 18 o'clock. Or until 8 o'clock the next day. Exactly, so time 8.00. And then I thought it was an appointment proposal, you have to confirm it. But then it says, if you are prevented,

please arrange a new appointment with us. And I thought that you only have to call if you are prevented. Yes, but that says it too. So it's not just a proposal, but it's already the appointment, then I'll come. And then it goes down a line further. Then it's crossed, appointment appointment, under, and then a mobile phone number, also crossed. Because there are two phone numbers where you can call

and one is crossed. First it says, okay, then I'll come. Then it's just a proposal. Then it suddenly says, if you're prevented, you had to call. And then it says, appointment prevented, they have to call. And then it says, appointment, sure, you have to call. We didn't call three times.

And I stopped you because you said, yes, we don't know what's going on. Yes. I pushed myself, and I'm sorry. And then it came... I forgive you. Yesterday, you weren't there. I say it like that, he was in a hurry.

But I couldn't go into the discussion. I did what I would do in traffic, if I got robbed on the way and then drove into the car. I would say, I'm sorry, I take all the blame. But sorry, this flyer is a communicative catastrophe, right? Yes. So I'll be there for sure. No, it's just a suggestion. Yes, I'll be there for sure. No, it's just a suggestion. Yes, I'll be there, but if you can't, you have to call.

No, it's just a suggestion. Maybe you should call. Hey, that's too much for me. But what do other people do? I imagine that there are very few people there. Because... And he doesn't realize that it's because of his flyer. But he thinks people are messing with him.

That's probably why he's so loaded. So he came, something like that went fast, read it briefly, and then I saw him in his jacket. Really such a shock. So 20 centimeters high stack of these cards. So he has a lot to do. With digital printing 24, you have to order 50,000 of them. I think he'll get more card calls than he'll get more heaters.

Honestly, Chris, I'm not a bad person. I'm sorry we put him on the spot. I'm also sorry he hired a bad graphic designer who designed this catastrophe. That's why I want to offer you to write on the list that he gets a chocolate eagle out of chocolate from our ministry. With a nice cover of our lettering paper. Best with a red seal made of wax with our stamp on it.

But it happened and I tried to de-escalate. I said I'm sorry, I was gone. I said I was on a business trip. But he didn't poke around anymore. I wanted to get it over with quickly. I was happy about that. I wanted to bring something back. There was a dentist check-up at my place.

I was in the waiting room. We discussed it in a podcast. But every time I come to the waiting room, I don't know. Do I have to greet people when I was in the waiting room. And every time, we talked about it in a podcast, but every time I come into the waiting room, I don't know if I have to greet people or not. Do you come in? Hello, welcome, good morning. Welcome to the waiting room! How are you today? That's not it. I usually wait to see if someone greets me. And if no one greets me, I don't greet either,

which is wrong, because you should, if, then yourself, but I'm not like that either. I think everyone who's sitting in the room has a pain, a struggle, let's just suffer here, we don't have to lie in our pockets and do things that would interest us, who's running the room now. Yes, I think you have to deal with the situation with a little bit of a finger tip. Everyone has something, you're right, I thought so too. You have to have a bit of a

carried-out mood in the waiting room. I think it's brilliant. It's not a happy life. There are people who are serious and who worry that they don't want to shine and have a super cool life. But that's what actually happened. I can't quite understand it.

But my question, and it's actually in a new I can't quite understand it, but my question, and it's actually in a new category, I thought. I just have a question, I don't want to judge it. It's more a thing where I want to put a big question mark behind it. And I wanted to ask you if you'd like to make a new category, the question mark of the day, where you just don't really understand why it's actually like that.

But I don't want to judge it, because I'm not sure about my own opinion. Chris, I'd love to hear that. We could do it like this, we'll split it up. I'll say the question mark of the day and you'll say something like, well, that's a riddle for me. And I thought we could do it a little bit like on the show with the mouse. So that's a riddle for me. Yes, exactly.

We'll say it right away and I'll make a trailer out of it. Okay, let's go. And then we'll hear a follow-up sound in the field. Let's go straight in. The question mark of the day. So that's a mystery to me. So my question is, I had an appointment at 8 a.m. as the first one with two other people and we were all three waiting for us.

I have to say, risky to go to the dentist at 8 a.m. because at 8 a.m. the dentist is also still tired. So he may not see very clearly yet. Because he might not see the tired eyes properly. Yes, now think about what it is like when you are there at 6.30 p.m. what she then sees. Nothing more. She always takes the risk with her. So that's brave, I have to say.

No, I have the rules. Terms in the morning and then it's over. Not at 6.30 p.m. That's the worst time. You can't do anything. 8 p.m. and then on. Clever. I couldn't take care of the heat waves. No, the cool thing is, after that you can still reward yourself with a really cool cake at the bakery. That's the reason why I go to the care of the heat. The cool thing is, you can reward yourself with a really nice

baking at the bakery. That's the reason why I go to the doctor in the morning. Oh, is that so? Yes, that's my life hack. With sober stomachs, because you don't know where you're going to be. Yes. I wanted to ask my question. Why do you call in the waiting room at 8 a.m. at all?

But in her case, she called about cold salad, the four days old one. And she went into an open conversation with the person at the other end. She asked if she liked cold eggs. She said, yes, I liked cold eggs before. And I said, I have nothing against cold eggs. But the longer, the more she said, I have nothing against cold eggs, but the longer, the more I felt so bad. Then she said, yes, but it's open in the fridge,

we didn't really poke it in, but should I eat it now? I'm still at the dentist. It's almost philosophical questions with cold eggs. Then she started speculating what happens with the dentist, then they have to drill, I don't know if I can eat. The cold eggs. And cold eggs again and again at 8 am. That's disgusting.

I'm sorry, that's my question mark of the day. I want to put a question mark behind it. I don't judge anyone. Telephone in the waiting room, does it have to be? I don't know. Maybe it is. Cold eggs, some say so, others say so. Yes, I think we shouldn't make a final judgment. Cold eggs can be put in a room like this.

Or maybe better in a room like this. Or maybe better, in the fridge. Chris, I still have to ask you to stop laughing, because I want to make a serious note here. Something very serious happened. Between Metzingen and Enningen, in the district of Reutlingen, something serious happened. There were medical records found in the forest.

Medical records? Yes, right. I don't know if it was about cold eggs or your dentist. I don't know what it's all about, but it happened. And now that you've just spoken to the doctor, you're doing great. So I would like to ask you to play the part for... And so the following happened. On a walk

hit the documents of the Uniklinik Tübingen. There are notes and instructions with diagnosis and discharge letters from three patients. The letters, which were about 15 years old, were laid loose and without a cover on the floor. The woman gave the documents to the police. The Uniklinik Tübingen is very sorry. Data protection fraud.

Yes, so that's actually worse. It's almost as bad as standing in a practice room and saying, hello, my name is Chris Sommer and I'm here because I'm getting a cramp in my back. Very loudly. And the waiting room is still open, and everyone can hear it. I've been getting cramps in my back for days. Data protection is finally taken into account. Oh, or on the phone. Yes, Chris Sommer, yes, aha, you're in the Kimmer, okay?

I'll make an appointment with you. Jutta, this summer you're already in the Kimmer again. Yes, well, that's not how it is. That's how it is in Germany. But when you get there and you're so in need, and you come along, I also live this self-diagnosis. I've had a cramp or something has twitched. Or you've shot me in the back, I love these self-diagnoses, I've been shot or something. Or, I've been shot in the back.

I like that, this form. You've been shot. The witch shot you. Yeah. Is that so? Yes. Then I have to... Make a postcard out of it for our humor ministry. Yes, definitely. Yes, yes, yes. Havie witch.

It comes down in the basement. So, doctor's documents. From the clinic in Tübingen. Yes, right. Clinic in Tübingen. And then I have to say, that's not possible. I, doctors, documents. From the clinic in Tübingen. Yes, right. The clinic in Tübingen. And then I have to say, that's not possible. I find that quite bad. But then again, I ask myself of course immediately, what happened before. And then I have to say, if I were a doctor now, right?

And I would now start, I would be a professional beginner and I'm good at the medical part and so on, but then of course you have to master the human part. And now I'll put it this way, it's a bit of a dark topic, although I don't think it's dark at all, we all die, but what I want to say is that as a doctor you have to sometimes pass on the message of Hiyop and say, I'm sorry, you will die in the future. And if you're a professional, if I were,

and I get the first time the order to say to a person, excuse me, I'm really sorry, you have nice shoes, but you're going to die tomorrow, then I might as well let one or the other patient's records disappear. No, you can't do that. Of course. I think it's exactly the opposite.

It's not at the point where you say it could end, but where it just goes on. The records are 15 years old. But it's not that old either. I think someone, it was still summer, Peter Mafei was on the radio, where it just keeps going. The files are 15 years old. But it's not that old either. I think someone... It was still summer, Peter Mafei was on the radio, or Matthias Reiben, good mood,

K-Büro open, and then... Flying in the eyes. A chauvinist from a university hospital was reading with one hand on the steering wheel, flop in the mouth, still reading a little bit on the national road, patient files that are 15 years old. And then she suddenly sees Julia Beemund, reads a little bit on the country road patient files,

the 15 years old ones, and then she suddenly sees Julia Becker, she has a disease, wait a minute, we've had a poison for a long time, a medicine. The Kimmeljog? We can cure them, they will live a lifetime. They will live a lifetime. Live a lifetime.

They will be a little bit, that's something to celebrate. And then patient files from the Caprio, from Peter Maffay, says, that's something to celebrate. And then, patient record from the Caprio with Peter Maffei with flop in the mouth. Because she was healed. Right. Healing and then thrown away out of joy and then taken away by the gust of wind into the forest. I think it's more like that, where you say,

yes, to celebrate a crown, throw the stuff out of the car. And maybe someone finds it and gets hope. Well, it's interesting, there are often pensioners who find it. We had a case last time where the same pensioner twice. What was it again? In Karlsruhe, at Turm, the school edge. Because they always go the same way. They go every morning at 5.30 am.

Pensioners very early on the way, they go their way every day. And therefore, if there is a change, they see it first on the edge of the road. They do their round, as they say. They just do their round every day. And they look of course also for the right. And women who have so much time and also always, they have a certain routine,

that means they usually always go the same route. If you go the route 435 million times, you'll notice immediately if something is different. And if a small piece of paper is peeking out of the leaves, you'll notice. But I like that they have the piffiness. I'll go after that. I'll observe that.

I'll go closer and then the local authorities, the state authorities contact and then things take their course. Actually, you have to say, German pensioners are the extended arm of the German criminal police, of criminal investigations, if not even both arms and both legs. You have to say that now. For free, for free. If we didn't have them, if we didn't look for them on the right,

if they went their way, who knows how many corpses, school rams, leaves, liver sausage, mustard glasses, what was found there. Old tires, sofa, TV. What wouldn't have been found there if we didn't have German renters. Yes, that's how you can just go for a walk and become an honorary official, I would say.

I think we should also be approved in our ministry. All members of Germany get the chocolate federal eagle out of the shell. I have to say, I unfortunately have a little downer at the end. Out of the week, I'd like to briefly... Because I also go for a walk from time to time. Or I thought... That's like this downer. No, I thought I'd go...

It's autumn, you make a little pumpkin spice, you take a cup with you. I bought a to-go cup made of ceramic. You know those little salt sprays you take with you on a hike? There you have a little one with pumpkin spice. Just make it everywhere. Fried sausage. I'll make myself a hot cup. I go out into the mud and mud weather and of course you need a transition jacket.

And I saw a comedian recently who wore a vest like this. He looked hip, cool. And then I ordered one and kept it. The return deadline is over. But I only tried it out this week and realized it's a nice and good vest. You also have some pockets. You can put pumpkin spice in there.

But you just have... I froze on my arm. It's a vest, and the sleeves are missing. That's disgusting. I think the sleeves are missing on the vest. Yes, you're right. I was warm on my body, but I had cold on my arms. And a little bit down.... The sleeves are missing. You have to say, you're dragging something thick down

so your arms don't freeze, but then you sweat on your body. Right, I can't give them back. And I thought, okay, I'll put on some warm clothes and leave the vest open. Yes. But then I thought, I can leave the vest at home and put on some warm clothes and put on my jacket. Or you just buy only sleeves. And then you thought, I can leave the vest at home, and just put on my sleeves and put on my jacket. Or you just buy sleeves.

And then you only wear sleeves. Every vest should have the opposite, only sleeves. But why are there actually vests to buy? But why not just buy sleeves? I wonder too. So there are people who only freeze on the body, they buy a vest, but there are also people who only freeze on their arms. They only need arms. Where are the only arms?

You can also buy pants, for example. There are also two pants legs. The chest is also covered. I think out of the week, vests. I'm sorry. I'm gifting it to everyone who feels comfortable in it. And warmed up often looks really cool. I'm not cool in there. I'm at most undercooled. Karlauer, what for the Karlauer department?

We can also put that off. But maybe a positive note. Please. You have to appreciate the little things of everyday life, which you already take for granted. I like to go for a walk, but more in me. I like to go for a walk in me.

With my thoughts on the journey. That means I open tabs, I'd like to go for a walk, but more inside myself. I'd like to go for a walk inside myself. With my thoughts on the journey. I open tabs, go to the internet, and my favorite site is Google, and then Wikipedia. And you just wander through the internet. With Google and Wikipedia you find most things. That's my conclusion. But that's not what I do during the week.

Wikipedia has been around for months or even years now. I don't know anymore, but I'd like to appreciate again. When you're on a page and you're reading something, and every fourth keyword has its own article about me. But that's a different topic. That's what our ministry will do. We'll hire someone to write articles only for our Wikipedia article. I want my own secretary to do it. Yes!

And there's an article about if you give a term, for example, conch, Julia Becker has introduced the conch in the Federal Ministry of Humor. Then you can go over conch with your cursor, because of course Wikipedia is a browser thing for me on the computer, I do that on my cell phone. I put that in an unhealthy position in front of the desk. Until the witch shoots you.

Exactly. And if you go over this term with a cursor, then there's a preview. And you don't have to open the tab anymore. So you don't have to click on it anymore. Exactly. Then there's Julia Becker, 26th-time Vogue World Champion. So it's written directly when you're just driving a car?

Yes, one or two sentences. Only the most important thing, the concha. Exactly. At least you have a quick overview of what a concha is. Could also be a city in South France. Yes, the conch. Exactly, at least you get a brief overview of what a conch is. Could also be a city in southern France. Yes, it probably is. Let's not make it up. But is that new now with the preview? Was that not there before?

No, it's been going on for some time now, but I always want to think about the little positive things. Things that are natural, not taken for granted. And I want the internet community to be a revolution for this, not a novelty, but a revolution. They'll make my daily life easier. I think that's nice. That's a nice closing note, Chris. And from my point of view, everything can be speculations.

Honestly, speculations and dominoes are now the oil in the tank that keeps us running. I have to say, for me, it's also the meteorological beginning of autumn. I don't care. And then there's the other autumn, the calendar beginning. I don't care. I know then it's autumn, when you start talking to the Gilmore Girls on Instagram.

Then I know now it's autumn, and now it's about switching on the comfort series with these Gilmore Girls. By the way, I've already said the way, these dialogues are funny. They're incredibly funny. And I know Gilmore Girls well enough to understand what it's about. Where the joke is. We can then also put it in the carton.

Yes, come to G, you can find it. It's actually a parodied part. But you can definitely watch it on Instagram. I saved it as a highlight. People always ask, just look at the highlights. Parody, actually, right? Parody. But you can definitely watch it on Instagram. I saved it as a highlight. People always ask, just watch the highlights. I saved everything. I actually do that every year. When is your big podcast Gilmore Girls Re-Watch coming out? I don't know anyone, and people can show me something on the internet,

who knows Gilmore Girls as well as you do. That's right. I can't point that out. But I don't want to do a podcast with it, because honestly, not everything in this series is well-old. We have to say that. And then I don't feel like it. Then about it, because honestly, not everything in this series is well-old. And then I don't feel like it anymore. Then I have to let it out. I prefer to watch it in silence

and have my fun and good food. There must be something responsible that other people have been bent on today. But the dialogues are so dense. And sometimes I walk through the west wing where you live, and then I hear the TV, the dialogue, Rory Gilmore, and then I hear a little whistle voice,

and that's you who speaks all the dialogues. Where I think, what's going on? Hard to believe, but I can do all the dialogues, from all the episodes. Yes, many, definitely. Yes, I speak the whole series in English and German. Yes, that really made me happy, actually also in the middle of the week for me.

That makes me happy, it gave put a lot of effort into it. And now I want to end this episode on this personal, peaceful, autumn note. Now it's off again. Pumpkin Spice is being taken out of the West. Off to the Corsica with us. Take a nice full bath. And we'll hear from you next week. Then we may have a small, but very special announcement for you.

That's why it's worth to sign up next week. For all of you who don't hear this because you already signed up, well, maybe you're lucky and you'll hear the episode next week when it's on air. And we hope you sleep well. And at the end of the episode you're all under each other, right? Some of you signed up, the others already had an accident on the bus. Now the hard core is coming.

Others are just noticing that the toilet is not working. They opened the toilet box because they are cleaning the toilet. We could say that we have separated privately. Only four people would notice. We wanted to moderate. So, until next week, we'll be back. There's something for you. So stay happy and healthy until next week.

Hold on, I say, great, great, great. We'll make it. We'll go through it together. Until next week. Hang in there, I say. Great, great, great. We'll make it this fall. We'll get through it together. See you next week. Bye. Say bye. Say bye to the one who's not happy

to be in the moon. But many greetings, thank you for listening. Bye. Bye. Drenni's, the podcast from the comfort zone. Hi everybody, it's jungle Jim Jerome and I'm super excited to tell you that Inside Curling is back with Canadian and world curling hall of famers Kevin Martin and Warren Hanson. I'm Kevin Martin and this curling season we will be bringing you our ever popular weekly

show along with special coverage from Canadian championships, world championships and of course the Grand Slam of curling. I'm Warren Hanson, our weekly show will bring you five popular segments. What's happening around the curling world, hot rock topics, mailbag, what are you hearing, and in the house. First show of this season will be coming at you September 16th.

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