Dumb People Town - Dave Ross - Covered In Something

Episode Date: April 2, 2021

This week Dave Ross comes to town to hang with Daniel, Jason and Randy to hear about a LOT of pennies.

Skypains Avenue Hey townies, welcome to a Friday episode of Dumb People Town. Population you. Population Ross. David Ross. How are ya? do a friday episode of dumb people town population you population ross david ross how are you i'm good man i'm dumb i'm ready to go oh man not dumb although you're as dumb as you say what you've decided to do i think you printed out pictures of yourself to like like distract you from trying to make free throws in your own apartment i don't't know exactly. What's going on, man? I love them all. Those huge heads make me laugh every time you do a post with them. Yes. Wonderful. That's good to hear. It's good to

hear that it's even noticed at all. You know how quarantine is. I'm just posting in my phone. I got no idea if anyone's seeing this stuff. Into the abyss. How many giant Dave Ross heads do you have? Dave Ross fat heads? Well, let's see. I have 10 2-foot-t foot tall heads and then i have three

hat torso and heads and then i have one three foot tall head and i also recently got an email from the company fathead that makes these uh inquiring if i would uh like to have some free fat heads in exchange for me posting about them. You said hell yes. Don't make my head fat with these dreams. All right, fine. I thought it was going for something. I love it. You know what I did, too?

I am so happy to be sponsored by Fat Head. Fat Head sponsored comedian Dave Ross. Thank you. God, it feels good to say that. But they asked me. They said I could get two things from them. So I got a cutout, full body cutout of me just looking like shit. One of those photos where I just look like shit.

And then I also tricked, he doesn't know this yet. I'm announcing this on your show. Here we go. I told Simon Gibson that I need a full res photo of him for the Good Heroin website. And he's going to get a fat head. He's going to get it. He's going to get ready.

He's going to get that. So funny. That's a good trick. That's a good trick. So, so good. Doing dumb stuff in the core. I mean, what else are we going to do? What else are we going to do?

We're trying to just do dumb stuff just to keep ourselves sane in this period of time. I think so. I think we've gotten dumber. I really do. Do you think we've gotten dumber in this time, Dave? Yeah. I mean, I think we've been getting exponentially dumber real quick for a while now.

But yeah. And it's actually real quickly. Dumber and crazier. Dumber and crazier. Yeah. Yeah. I have like, I don't know. I mean, I don't want to bring the mood too far down.

But it's funny how like regularly I'll just kind of freak out one way or another. Yeah. I have like, I don't know. I mean, I don't want to bring the mood too far down, but it's funny how like regularly I'll just kind of freak out one way or another. Yeah. And isn't it funny how that happens in quarantine? And then after you're like, oh, I feel better. Okay. Yeah. No, that doesn't. I'm not crazy.

That's just, I just needed to do that. I woke up at 4.30 in the morning this morning and I was like, yeah, I'm not going back to sleep. And my body was like, nope, you're not doing it. I flip-flopped more than John Kerry. I flip-flopped so much in my bed. I flip-flopped in my bed. I flip-flopped so much in my bed.

It felt like I was on a swift boat. You're swift-boating me out of this junk is what you're doing. It's bizarre. So I flip-flopped so much and I was like, every time I flipped, I'm like, what I'm about to do is not going to make me go to sleep. Oh, yeah. And I was freaking out.

I got on the melatonin thing. And the funny thing about that is it works. It knocks you out i get sleep yeah but the sleep is horrible like i mean i i sleep deeply but the dreams are nuts i like fight wolves and they wake up like how are you doing it how are you taking them how are you taking the how are you doing it by spritz or by uh in the butt oh that's not you're gonna fight some wolves there that's the pleasure way do you that's not a good behavior. You're going to find some wolves there.

That's the pleasure way. That's the pleasure way. Do you know they have gummies? I hope you're taking gummies, like melatonin gummies. I'm doing... It's a quick-dissolve pill. Yeah. Do the gummies, man.

I got to do a gum... Okay. Gummies work. What's wrong with just four Advil PMs? And we'll be right back with more Express Scripts. Guys, let's get into some dumb behavior. All right, Daniel. You got a story.

We have a story sent to us. Are you ready for this? Yes. Sent in by Liz Haggerty at Liz Haggerty. Gentlemen Liz Haggerty. Here we go. Lady Liz Haggerty. Mound of pennies dumped in man's driveway. He blames feud over final paycheck.

You have to go through so much to make this happen. Is it weird that just by calling it a mound, it sexualizes the pennies for me? It does feel a little... Wow. It's a sexier grouping of pennies. That's how I felt when you said gummy before.

Yeah. Gummy. Just gum it for a while. Gummy. That's how I felt when you said fathead. Hey, Bucks. A Peachtree City man. Sounds like a children's book.

Peachtree City. Yeah. Peachtree City sounds like a children's book. It's tree city. Yeah, peace tree city could be a pretty cool band. Peach tree city with the grass is green and my pen is all bitter peach tree city related. You know, peach tree city opened up for Savage Garden in nineteen. Yes, do not tell me otherwise she said, hey, coming at you coming at you.

It's fifteen pass the hour right here. Going to be about 26 to the next hour in a few minutes. We want to tell you. Peachtree City's coming to town. You can have a new nonstop rock block here on 101.1 The One. 101.1 The One. At Savage Garden, we are a Chicka Cherry Cola. Let's get it going.

Can you name three Savage Garden songs, Dave Ross? He probably can. No, you can't. No way. The Chicka Cherry Cola one. Is Dave Ross? He probably can. No, you can't. No way. The Chicka Cherry Cola one. Is that one? The Mountain one. I got another one.

Dan, you got one? Truly, Madly, Deeply. Isn't that the Mountain? I want to throw you off of a mountain. Okay, guys. Okay, guys. Okay. By the way.

Fuck you on a mountain. No. Is something about a cracked windshield. Is that them? No. What if you look it up and they don't have Savage Garden dashboard

confession? Is that the same thing? No dashboard confessional. You mean couldn't be further. Okay, as a very young boy, truly, truly, truly, really madly.

This one. Yeah. What was the other one you guys? Chicka Chicka Terricola. Yeah, which is not the name of the song. I think that's Truly Madly Deeply. That's the same one. Or is that the mountain one? Chicka Dee Chin. It's a Chinese chicken.

No, I knew one. That's Bear Naked Ladies. Santa Monica. That was one. Remember Santa Monica? No, that's Everclear. No, that's Savage Gardens. Santa Monica. What? Everclear. Also, here's Savage Garden, Santa Monica. What? Everclear. Also, here are the big ones. I knew I loved you.

I want you to the moon and back. I want you as the chicken cherry cola. Yeah, ooh, I want you, I don't. Yeah, that's 100%. Dan, I couldn't, if you played it for me, I couldn't even tell you that stuff. By the way, this could be a bit that the two of you are doing, and I'd be like, I don't know. I'm guessing you're right. I've never heard them. I've never

heard. Can I tell you about Savage Garden to me too isn't worth a mound of pennies. Hey, we're back on the story. Thank you Dave Ross. Bring it us back three words into this story for a peach tree city man claims a bitter feud over a final paycheck

ended with pounds and pounds of pennies delivered to his driveway. That's not gonna be that is not gonna be fun to clean up. Andreas Flaten said when he submitted his two week notice in writing last November, hell hath no fury like a like with like a frustrated brought boss. That's well there's now look. He gives a description of what his boss did when he quit, and I don't know why, but when I read this. By the way, and I'm just sorry, but do it right.

Like hell hath no fury like a frustrated boss. That's not it. It's hell hath no fury like a boss scorned. Yes. That's what he should have said. Right. Yes. Right.

Well, here's his description. It should have been hell hath no fury like a foreman scorned that works to like a woman. So I'm so I don't want to write this for you on the race, but you can't. You're punching it to send a mound of pennies to me. Here's his description of what his boss did when he quit, and for some reason to me it's hilarious quote. He froze up and stared at me for like a straight minute. I remember this so clearly. He gets up, put his hands on his head, walks out the door and disappears for like an hour.

Okay, what that is this guy not aware that people quit at that point. At that point, he like got up as though like he had just gotten a divorce out of nowhere. Like he was like up and out hands on head, walks out, leaves for an hour. That's when the guy quits. What do you do in that hour? What was this guy's job? Andreas Flatton worked at Walker Luxury Auto Works in Peachtree City.

So he's doing the Lord's work. For a year. He had known the owner for eight years, but Andreas Flatton said that the constant turnover and toxic work environment took a toll. In one year yes wow geez so here's the problem he knew about the toxic work environment and turnover and turmoil for eight years he only chose to work there for one year so it's like he probably knows this guy is i can change him yeah you can't change you can't change the boss doesn't sound toxic to me at all.

Yeah, no, this guy. Did the boss dump a thing of pennies? No. That's who did it, right? Yes. Andreas Flaten claims on his last day. Oh, it is toxic. He delivered his uniforms washed and in a box

complete with another letter explaining why he was leaving. This is very formal. God, this guy's amazing. He's covering all bases. Yeah. He said his boss promised luxury auto works promised his final check would be paid in January.

It never arrived. He said his boss accused him of damages. I honestly at this point never expected him to place pay. No, no flatten called George's Department of Labor. Five months later he was paid presumably the full amount in pennies.

How much? Are we going to see the picture of what it looks like? Yes. I'm going to show everyone a picture of this pennies. What if it looks just like this mound of pennies? Pennies from heaven. It's in the shape of Anwar Sadat. What?

That's the driveway. That is a lot of pennies. I have nowhere to put them. I had no idea. Is this file called ross1.jpg on the internet? Is that just a coincidence? No, we named it for you. This is your picture.

Wait, Dan. Dan, how hard would it be to just scoop that into a bag and then into a trash bag and take it to a bank? I don't know. We're going to find out. No, but the banks don't like it either. then they listen this is what andrea said i have nowhere i have nowhere to put them i had no idea what i was going to do like how do i get money from pennies now look how do i get money from pennies it is money you idiot yeah it's it's how do i turn pennies into money well you know the song you know the song pennies from heaven. This is money from pennies.

Pennies from heaven. If you follow our six-week seminar, we're going to tell you how to turn money from pennies. Maybe somebody of a stripper was like, I have all these singles. How do I get 20s and 100s? How can I turn this into money? Well, there is one way in which

it's different, not to be too divisive, but, get in here. Pennies are money. But in Andreas' defense, are there banks? No, what you have to do is a coin star, and then you're going to lose a percentage of the money out the gate. Right. And then you could carry garbage bags of pennies to a bank,

and then they're still mad at you. Most banks will only take pre rolled right and then they have to unroll them to make sure that they're all the way through. Yeah, you didn't just give them like things from the zoo, right? Wow coins that you made from the zoo, which are actually a dollar

criticism. Nothing online calls for karma calling the cash dump. It's a coin dump petty flatten stored the pennies in Eddie or penny petty. Okay flattened, stored the pennies in his garage inside a large wheelbarrow, brand spanking

new wheelbarrow where that is full to the brim. The wheels are like busted out to the side flat and dress flatten and his girlfriend mad. I know Andreas flatten and I wish I wish we had a honey. I wish we had a wheelbarrow

that worked. Well, we don't we don't because the pennies are in it. We don't and I don't know how to make pennies currency. I don't make pennies money Andreas flatten and his girlfriend said all the pennies are covered in a type of substance or oil and cannot be cashed until they are all clean. A quote from his girlfriend says they're covered in a type of substance or oil and cannot be cashed until they are

all clean. A quote from his girlfriend says they're covered in something. Don't know what it is, but it smells funny. It's semen. Yes, yes, this guy. Whoa, jerk, this jerk covers them in something, puts them in his driveway, leaves a note. I could not find out what the note said, but it's hard as I looked.

Yeah, CBS forty six is working to get the owner's side of the story, and when we come back, we're going to we're going to hear it. But first Andreas Flatton said that his final check comes out to be like how many pounds of pennies, how many

pounds of his final paycheck is the equivalent of how many this is his house of pennies. Now you've seen the picture. Dan, this is his guess. And we know that it broke a wheelbarrow. Is this what he says or is this the actual poundage? It comes out to this amount of poundage. Okay, so Dave, what do you think? Do you know the amount of money?

Do you know how much? We will before the end of this episode. You got to guess poundage right now, my friend. You're taking the eye test, bro. And it broke a wheelbarrow. Well, he's just saying it's heavy. He's saying it's flattening the tires. Flattening the tires.

Still. Man, that's a tough. I'm going to say like 80 pounds. 80 pounds of pennies. So Jay and I, when we did the United Stats of America. 80 pounds of pennies is a third eye blind song. Or a three dog night song. 80 pounds of pennies is actually my Third Eye Blind cover band. Actually, it's my Five Doors Down, Third Eye Blind mix up.

80 pounds of pennies is my cover band. We also play Two Princes by Spin Doctors. 5,000, 2,500, 600 pennies. 80 pounds is what you said, David? I'm 15 for a moment. No. I would walk 5,000 miles. Why won't you step out from that ledge, my friend?

We got there. We got everywhere. All right, Jay, what do you think? I'm going to say 180 pounds. 180 pounds. I'm going to say 210 pounds. 210 pounds. So you say 210, you say 180, you say 80, Dave Ross. We are going to say two hundred and ten pounds, two hundred and ten pounds. So you say two ten, you say one eighty, you say eighty Dave Ross. Well, we're going to take a break when we come back. We're not only going to

find out this answer. We're going to hear the other side of the story. We're going to see what Dave Ross is up to. I know some great things. Good, good, good. And if you're a patreon member, you're going to get a little bit of bonus content when he tells us his own dumb story later on at the end of the episode. If I know Dave Ross, it's going's gonna be beautiful we'll be right back after this stick around make it sound there's more hey guys welcome back to the show uh we are so excited um just to this does this drop before the 10th i don't know if it does

if it does it does it drops on the 2nd hey get your tickets get your tickets for the live Dumb People Town with Ryan Sickler

oh my goodness the honey dumb you know he does a great podcast called the honey do and then we do Dumb People Town as we merge it together

and the cactus blossoms they're so good it's just a great band one of the best bands in America just come and enjoy it's like we don't have many more nights that. One of the best bands in America right now. Just come and enjoy. It's like we don't have many more nights that we'll be able to do this type of a thing.

So come and enjoy this special thing as we figured out how to pivot in this pandemic and give you guys a show and content. We always love seeing you guys. Eventbrite.com. Get those tickets. DanielVanKirk.com for all the stuff he's got going on. Yeah, play Bingo, Trivia Night,

Live Pen Pals with me and Rory. Follow us on Stereo, all that stuff. Dave Ross, what's cooking with you, buddy? Dude, people can start getting their emo sports clothes, right? Oh, yeah. Yeah, that stuff started arriving. Man, that's so funny. Yeah, that's one of the things I've got going on in quarantine.

I just started. I have this logo maker that I subscribe to, and I'm also, I've been a graphic designer for a while, so I started making these dumb sports logos that say emotional shit like uh do you know a good therapist and help and stuff but they look like nfl team like logo shirts and they say like emotional things having trouble it's so funny too because i've like you know quarantine we've all been trying to make it work and figure it out right so i like i started a solo podcast and a podcast with a friend and i've like bought new equipment and you see i got this background and i've like honestly

been grinding and totally it like works a little but you know building an audience out of lockdown is hard it's been difficult it's kind of killed me a lot of the time and then i make these sports logos people like them three days later i make a web store i put them up and uh it's uh the the only real financial thing i've done are you kidding me i love it what's the website where can people get the web store it's uh www.emo.football that's the email football dude please tell me there's one of a guy busting through a line and it just says impotence on it oh that's a good one we don't have that yet there you go and then you have the good hero podcast that i was on we talked for like i don't know two two and a half hours but it flew by i absolutely oh that show's been so fun man

and then uh tell everybody about your podcast with caleb oh yeah i have a podcast with caleb signing we uh we meet in a park and we sit six feet away from each other and every week we rename something famous nice i love that it's been so fun like we uh yeah we just and it's really just we shoot the shit um and then uh we do that too but we take we tweet it out every sunday night record monday morning what's something that you've renamed famous in the recent in the recent episodes so uh citizen kane became dude My Sled. That's great. Yeah. That's so good. That's been fun. Come on.

Let's see another. We renamed The Simpsons Extremely Fat and Incredibly Straight. Nice. That was a lot of fun. That's really good. Perfect. Dude, I love it. So you name those, rename famous things.

It's time for things to get that reboot. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. All right. So when we stopped off, there was a mound of pennies that a guy who had just quit his job or put in two-week notice wrote a note, wrote a second note.

He did everything right. It's a toxic work environment. And then his boss showed him how toxic it was by dumping a mound of pennies that he now has. We guessed the poundage. In the wheelbarrow. So Dave guessed 80 pounds. Jay said 180.

I said 210. Right. Townies, if you're a Patreon member and you're watching this live, get those answers into the chat right now. Fire up. If you are listening to this wherever you are in life, scream it because the

pounds of pennies that this guy found in his driveway that equaled his final check is 504 pounds. Oh my God. I was right.

It's a lot, dude, bro. So we, when we were in Denver for the United States of America, we went to us mint and they just had money making pennies. That's right. There's my make bet.

Remember they had those huge sacks of quarters and stuff? And it was like, I mean, it was like 1,000 pounds. I should have known, but that's just- 504 pounds of pennies. You can't pick that up at a wheel. Like, where are you going to put that wheelbarrow? Is the reason that it took him that long to punish him with the penny mound, that that's how long it took for him to turn the money into pennies?

Because where do you get the pennies? How many stores do you go like how do you even get yeah this is a plan he did that just took a while took so much here's the other thing that's really funny about this is that that's so vindictive yeah but he's really the one who gets hurt like at the end of the day he's the idiot who had to haul the pennies around and find them right i had a boss once who was mad at me when i quit and uh called me into work and was like i have a last check for you and when i and i was like oh thank you so much i need money and when i got there there was a check in a sealed envelope that she had signed and it was for zero dollars and zero cents oh that is

mean super mean but it was a punishment that punished me, not her. I'm just saying. It's not a penny mound. By the way, penny mound is the scariest penny mound. It's a clown who lives in the sewer. Okay, fine. We all live in a penny mound machine. Wouldn't that be great if penny mound was a

500 pound clown that scared kids and dairy men? No, he couldn't get out of the sewer. He couldn't fit into the sewer. My 500-pound clown. Yeah. Richie. My 500-pound. Richie.

I'm Penny Bound. Come down. Help me wash myself with a stick. Richie, I gotta give myself an insulin. I can't come up there to you. I'm out. I'm too big. Nothing floats down here.

I'm too big. Richie down here. I'm too big. I need to give myself an insulin shot. I'm too big. This is a bit about how it is fat.

Yes. Fat it. He's been a rough quarantine. Roll me another diet coke. Roll it through.'s been a rough quarantine. Roll me another diet coke. I don't have the energy to chase you kids. Come here. Please come here.

I'll scare the crap out of you if you get down here. I need to go to the car. Help me. Can someone get a forklift? It's Penny Mound. Get the paddles. I just had three tiny heart attacks. Okay, so we're talking about

amount of pennies dumped in Andre's flattened house in the middle of the night as a form of payment for his final check from full title a okay Walker luxury auto shop, which doesn't sound. How good is that luxury auto shop? It's all right. It's all right. CBS forty six spoke with Walker.

That is of Walker Luxury Auto. This is the guy person about the pennies and recorded the conversation. Oh God, may I ask you about the pennies? Do you know anything about them? Asked reporter Jamie Kennedy in case you had wondered what he's been. I mean, this is this whole thing has being a reporter is a huge experiment. Yes, may I ask you what the we got it there? We got there. Do you know anything about them said Walker? I know tons about it. What's wrong with it?

That even did not know that I'm a bad liar. J so much. I. So did you drop the pennies over at that person's house? Walker said, I don't know if I did or not. I don't really remember what so he knows everything about it. He does not know. Dan, that has to be jeans. I don't know anything about it. I don't really remember

ask Jamie you one follow up. You don't know if you did it or not. It doesn't matter. He got paid. That's all that matters. He's a fucking weenie and yes, he's a fucking weenie for even bringing

it up and quote who says fucking and weenie. You either say just weenie because you are a fucking D back off. You dropped an F bomb as you're pulling the next one.aning. Or he's a fucking D-bag. He's a jag off. You dropped an F-bomb as you're pulling the next punch. Here's what he's mad about. He's mad about for even bringing it up as though he shouldn't mention it.

Well, this guy is for sure unhinged as fuck. Bound of pennies. Can't imagine it being a toxic work. Yeah, I can imagine just that guy. They're wonderful. What if we find out that the thing is that this guy always pays everyone in pennies? Just a mound of pennies. Yeah, you knew that when you started

it seemed like too much of a stretch to ask a penny for his thought. Stop Jamie. What are you trying to get a job at the New York Post? Shut the hell up. Then Jamie said why is he a weenie for bringing it up? You got to appreciate Jamie's follow-up.

Because he is, and because you guys give him a platform, said Walker. I just told you exactly what I had to say. You guys are what's wrong with the world. Get the fuck off my property. I'll give you a mound of pennies. I think the Jamie Kenny experiment should have been

called JK. Just kidding. Yeah, right. JK. So then he leaves and that that should be the end of the story. I have one last thing for you all. What happened? How much money okay in pennies was left

in Andre's Flattens driveway. It's a little over five hundred pounds, five hundred and four pounds of pennies was left in Andres Flattens driveway. It's a little over 500 pounds, 504 pounds of pennies. How much money do you think that comes out? What do you think? Yeah, it's like seven bucks.

Yeah, I don't know. What would that be like? Yes, six hundred dollars, six hundred dollars from Dave Ross. I think it's like four ninety four. $490 from Randy Sklar. $375.

$375. $4 million. Get your answers. Get them in the chat. Come on, bring them in the chat or wherever you are listening to this. We thank everybody who's here with us. If you're a Patreon member, like the people who are watching this live, stick around.

Someone said like $1,000. Is that what someone said? Stick around. I think that's Christy who said that. $1,000 in the chat. Thank you, Christ chat. Thank you. If you're a patron member and you're not here live, stick around because you're going to get to hear Dave's own dumb people

town story his life, but I will leave you all with this. They want to money left and Andres flattens driveway. 504 pounds of pennies is $915. Oh my God. That's a lot of money. Chrissy, I think, is the winner. She had a thousand. That's a lot of money. But it's probably two weeks work. It's about two bucks a pound.

A little under. 1.8. All right, you guys. Worth rolling them up and taking them to the bank. Well, Patreonis are live Patreonis fans who are checking this out right now. We get a wonderful story from Dave Ross. For everybody else, this is going to come your way too. Dave is one of our favorite people

who has not been afraid to do dumb things in his life. I mean, look, he just made a bunch of, he made a relationship with Fathead. And the company. And the company, folks. And, oh shit, we got to get back to work. Stick around.

Make a sound. Calm your down. It's Dump People Town.