Dumb People Town - DPT Mini - Natasha Chandel - The Curious Case of Benjamin Duddles

Episode Date: March 27, 2020

Today Dan, Jason and Randy welcome Natasha Chandel, host of the Kinda Dating podcast on Starburns Audio, Dan brings a story about a Wisconsin man who called the police line with multiple unusual requests.Check out Kinda Dating on Apple Podcasts

Star Pains, I know. make this so listen to our podcast with co-host our man Dan don't be a jerk cause when the music hits the funny hits we are gonna take you down stick around make a sound on your downies dumb people town

hey townies welcome to a Friday episode of dumb people town population new population Chando Natasha Chando. Welcome to the show. Welcome. Hello. Hi. It's so good to have you here. We want to do a TV show with you and Evan Handler and call it, we're your Evan Handler's Handler and we call it Chandel with Care. I love that. Are you going to do that? Is this the official pitch? Yeah, it might be the pitch

but we got to go out with you. We got to, we're going to slide in and get some of that Mr. Iglesias glow. Yeah, I'm great at handling people. So you've been writing on that show and how has that been?

It's been amazing. So fun. If you don't know, Mr. Iglesias I love him. is a sitcom on Netflix with Gabriel Iglesias or Fluffy. It's so weird because when I say Gabriel Iglesias, people are like, who?

And I go, Fluffy. They're like, oh! Like, just the fact that you called him Gabe, you were trying to be like, I know him better. I know him better than you guys. It's like a Bobby De Niro. Because it's almost weird to call him Fluffy in person. You're like, hey, Fluffy. Hey, Fluff, can you go grab me?

So here's my earliest memory of Gabriel Iglesias, which is kind of fascinating and cool. I remember when our friend Marta Raven, who's a very funny comic, did Premium Blend. Now, this is probably in like 2000. The warm-up comedian for Comedy Central's Premium Blend was Gabriel Iglesias. And he did so well warming up the crowd that Randy and I were watching it. We're like, this guy's going to be a star.

This guy is just Crush City. And he's funny. He's clean. This is how I felt about myself. You're going to be, I'm a star. That's too much confidence. No, but I felt about Natasha. You're going to be, I'm a star. No, but what I felt about Natasha. This girl's going to be a star.

But what I was thinking about when we were watching him is we're like, there are very few comics you watch who you're like, man, that guy's really funny. He has super broad appeal. And he's also being specific about stuff. So it's like that combination of those three things. I'm just like, you know who? And he's also being specific about stuff so it's like that combination of those three things I'm just like beautiful and he's a legit nice guy I know people cause I get hit up all the time is he really as nice as he seems

I'm like no we actually have a plaque in our writers room that says work hard be nice and one person got let go from the show cause they were being a bitch sorry this isn't the era of bitchiness and this isn't the atmosphere I want from the show because they were being a bitch. Yeah, sorry, sorry. It's like, don't. This isn't the era of bitchiness.

And this isn't the atmosphere I want on the show. We don't want someone poisoning the well. You can't work here, Greta Van Susteren. You're no longer a writer on. Oh, Jay mixing it up. About an inner city school. Why are you even on this stuff? You have the worst opinions ever. So, okay, well, we believe that the world is getting dumber,

and I know you've sort of listened to this, and I just think that it is time to fight back with comedy. Where are you from? Toronto, Canada. I'm kind of from all over, but born in Dubai, but raised in Toronto, Canada. Dubai, Toronto. Toronto's good.

They don't show up here very much in Dumb People Town. Yeah, they're pretty smart. We're a little better. Yes, you are a little bit better. You are a little bit better. Yeah. They're pretty smart. Yeah. We're a little better. Yes. You are a little bit better. You are a little bit better. We spent some time in Toronto. We shot a movie there.

It's been like three or four weeks there. And I just was like, Oh my God, I love this. It's the nicest people. Somebody said to me when I was there this past summer, they were like, if you took New York and Chicago,

combine them and made it great. That's actually a really good description. You know, my, my guy friend, um, cause in Toronto, one thing is like we Are sort of

Like everybody kind of looks cleaned up a little bit And so when I used to live in New York Everybody would be like, why are you always dressed up? I'm like, this isn't, this is me casual I was like, go to Toronto So then my guy friend went to Toronto He texts me, he goes, oh my god, you were right You were right, people dress it up

He goes, even the ugly people are pretty in Toronto. That's right. I told you. They care about how they look. There's no dumb people out there. Well, the world is getting dumber, and so we get stories sent to us by our awesome fans and friends. Guys, but first, I just have to say I'm super excited to be here.

I love your fucking show. Oh, thank you so much. I'm super honored. Oh, no. Are you kidding me? We're happy to have you. He feels mute. All right. I'm super honored. Oh, no. Are you kidding me? We're happy to have you. He's a huge. All right, let's do this.

All right, this was sent in by Brett Cummins at Motor City HDJ. Brett Cummins. We had a friend growing up named Brett Cunning. But I pronounced it Cunning. And I was like, that's a little racist, even though he's white. C-U-N-I-N. Jesus. Come on.

Come on, man. Brett Cummins. He was like, that's not bad. That's not too, too bad. That's his last name. He did what everybody should do. And the only way you can do it is hashtag dumb people town at Daniel Van Kirk. That's how you send the stories.

We never turn away bad stories. Dan is always really excited to fill up the well. DMs don't work, playa. You got to just hashtag it and add it. Slide into the main screen. Okay, here we go. Thanks, Brett, at Motor City HDJ. Nut nabbed for bizarre calls to police dispatch.

I love when a headline is like not even trying to be professional. We're just going to call this guy a nut. A nut. This is from the Smoking Gun. So he called the police department weirdly and they said, we're going to pick this guy up. We're going to nab this nut. There was no objectivism to this reporting. So he's a nutbag.

Under that, the little sub headline is, Wisconsinite sought, quote, some quality time together. Which is very Wisconsin. January 29th, a Wisconsin man who once called 911 for help in dealing with something completely different, we'll get around to that, has been arrested for dialing police dispatchers and asking if, quote, they wanted to fool around or, quote, spend quality time together. Oh my gosh. Now look, offhand, I was like, fuck this guy. He's some sort of like sexual creep dude. But it's not, he's just a nut. Wasn't Wisconsin, oh sorry. like, fuck this guy. He's some sort of sexual creep dude. But he's just a nut. Wasn't Wisconsin...

Oh, sorry. No, no, please. I was saying, wasn't Wisconsin the place where the cuddle... The cuddle party? There was a cuddle zone. That feels Portland to me. No, that was Wisconsin. It was?

Yeah, it was like Appleton, Wisconsin. Wait, what's a cuddle party? There was a place that you could hire people to cuddle with you. I think we did both. It was like a cuddle therapy. So it's non-sexual, but it's too cuddle party? There was a place No you could hire people To cuddle with you I think we did both It was like a cuddle therapy So it's non-sexual But it's too Is it?

I mean Who knows But it's just I think it's people Seeking Yeah like every ex That you text late at night Be like let's just lay together

Have you guys seen This show Special? No On Netflix About It's Ryan O'Connell He has He in real life

Has cerebral palsy And so he's just Sort of this like He has, he in real life has cerebral palsy and so he's just sort of this like anti-hero. But in it, now I'm remembering, I'm like, oh yeah,

he hired a guy to cuddle with him to like learn how to just be with somebody. That sounds legit. That's a great storyline for a show.

That's fantastic. Cuddle buddy. Cuddle buddy. Well, it's just someone you can hire. So this guy just wants to spend time and maybe some quality time with the cops.

But I also feel like there's that moment, and maybe this is the parent in me, where it's like, okay, we can't have nice things anymore. You can't have a 911 because people are going to misuse 911. Cops say, I mean, sometimes the name makes the town. Cops say

Benjamin Duddles loves to Cops say Benjamin Duddles loves to cuddle. Benjamin Duddles loves to cuddle. That's awesome. Duddles, party of four. Actually, I'm sorry. Let's make it more accurate. Party of one. Duddles, party of one. By the way, if you're one,

they can never say party of one. There's no party of one. Duddles, just you. Duddles, pity party of one. There's no party of one. Duddles? Just you? Duddles, pity party of one. Duddles, pity party of one. It just sounds like a prank name. Like being the paramedic or whatever on the other line. You're like, hi, who's speaking?

Brian Puddles? Duddles? Duddles? And then you're like, puts it on hold. Duddles on one. Who wants it? Right. I'm not taking it. No, I took it last time, Rick.

You take it. So Duddles is a great last name and it's easy to pronounce and whatnot. We always sclar three consonants in the row. Why do people do this? I'm assuming yours

was mispronounced at restaurants and stuff when they call the name or something like that. Well, it was usually at school. So my name is Natasha Chandell. Chandell. The Indian way

is Natasha Chandell. But in school, for some weird reason, every single teacher would always call me Chantel once. Chantel. And I'm like, wait a minute. Where are you? Where did you mistake? And also, it's not like Natasha ever sounds like anybody's last name.

So I don't understand why they would always flip it. Is Chantel here? I don't see her. Chantel, Natasha. People of mine just keep removing it. They'll be like, Dan Kirk. I'm like, what did you think that was my middle fucking name? Dan Van.

Right, Kirk. So, yeah. You guys get Skylar. Skylar. Skylar. The other night. The Skylar brothers. Damn, we were running our set for Conan.

The other night, we're dropping in at the Ice House. So nice. So nice of us to these guys. TK, what's his last name? He's so good. I want to say Miller. Sweet guy. He has us on the show.

It's in the little room at the Ice House. It's packed. It's a great room. It's on fire. Can we drop in? Yeah, yeah, yeah. The host is going to bring you on stage. Just make sure that he checks the second mic.

Of course. Okay, great, great, great. He did. He intro'd us from the second mic to everything. Ladies and gentlemen, this is one of those great opportunities. We got a drop-in. These guys are fantastic. They're going to be on Conan tomorrow night.

You're going to get to see the set right here. Are you guys excited? Yes. All right, let's give it up for the Scholar Brothers. Scholar. Okay, now here's the fucking deal. Scholar. I get riled up about things that piss me off.

That pisses me off. Here's my thing. 20 years, 25 fucking years you've been doing comedy. Okay. Right. Okay. Let's leave. Let's shelve that.

Right. Can we at least say, I know you're going to be humble that you have achieved, you have achieved the level of, of you would be defined as a celebrity. You've done enough credits. People should know. People should know already. Certainly in the comedy community. So now if you just have a passing fucking interest in Grey's Anatomy or Entourage, oh yeah, then you fucking know the Squire Brothers.

Okay? That's general public. Now let's go. You're in a goddamn comedy club. And the person bringing you up, at least by role definition, seems to be safe to assume they want to do comedy. They are a comic. You're on the road. they want to do comedy.

They are a comic. You're on the road. And you're telling me that in our current pop culture in a comedy club and you're a fucking comic you don't know the Sklar brothers? So this is how much

it's been ingrained in our This is what obviously I'm pissed off by. Dan, it happens it'd be like someone being like Jerry Seinfeld or something like that but you've never heard it before?

Like are you a fucking moron? It was like when our aunt said you know who I don't like? Our aunt Rita who was like when our aunt said, you know who I don't like? Our Aunt Rita, who was just in town, she's like, you know who I don't like? We're like, I can't wait to hear who you don't like. She's 85 now. She can't know Ohio. She's like, you know who I don't like?

We're in comedy. We're like, who? She's like, that Jay Leno. We're like, who's only read it? Because if you read it, it looks like Reno. Janet Reno. Janet Reno. She did Jay Leno. My dad's

nickname for Conan, because I was obsessed watching Conan every night as a kid, he was like, oh, you're watching that funk again. He's like, I'm a punk. I was like, he's so funny. He's like, yes he is, but he's a punk. Well, I just love that when we

were kids, and this is how ingrained it is that people are going to screw our name up. They're going to Skyler, Scaller, Scholar. That our dad, he wouldn't even tell us. We would go to restaurants where they announce your name and whatnot. He would just put the name in, and our dad's name was Richard Sklar. And they would just announce what they'd say is Richard's Party of Four. And without even – we're like, yeah, that's us.

Because we knew that like, our dad's like, I'm not even going to give you enough credit to get this right. I don't get it. I hope when people do that to you guys, you go up and be like, that's okay. Don't worry about learning our names. Hopefully you get passed at the comedy shop or the improv.

I do have to say though, on another end as like a brown person, I'm kind of like, oh, white people's names get fucked up too. Oh yeah, we get fucked up. That's kind of, it's really humanized. It does. It makes us feel connected. Well, Duddles last week called the non-emergency line at the Waukesha Police Department.

Non-emergency line. So he's not tying up valuable line space. Right. This was a very, like, specific. Targeted approach. It was a very targeted call. This was a very specific, targeted call. He called them how many times over a 37-minute period and made some odd requests. So we're going to play a quick little guess.

How many times? How many times do you think he called in 37 minutes with some odd requests? 37 minutes if you had to be Duds. Yeah. You're going to go to be Dudwings? I'm going to calculate this. I'm going to do real Indian math here. Maybe two a minute, 64.

64. I love it. Wait, that's not even the right math. That shows you what's so bad. It's 74. It would be 74. You're going to say 74? Is that Indian math?

That's long math. Indian math would say 64. 64? You say 74 minus 10 Because you took a couple minutes off 64 for you I'm going to say he called 20 times in 37 minutes I'm going to say he called 30 times

Or half Benjamin Duddles called 4 times In a 37 minute That's still enough You know what? It's enough to get you to answer Because it's like It's broken Do. You know what? It's enough to get you to answer. Right. Because it's broken. I'm like, do I remember this number? And also, they're like, maybe this is an emergency.

The sad thing is, if you did call 64 times, they'd have to answer every single time. In one conversation with a female dispatcher, Duddle said, it'd be super duper cool if we could spend some quality time together. The operator replied, I don't know you, so I don't want to spend quality time with you. Which, by the way, is protocol. That's what you should say. This is also where I was like, oh, is he a creep? And then I was like, because they pointed out it was female, it didn't matter to him.

While speaking with a male dispatcher during a second call, Duttles asked, well, do you want to fool around? No, I don't want to fool around. The operator shot back. So spend quality time with a lady, fool around with the dude. I love this guy. Officers, go ahead. I just love that this is like his version of like a 1-900 call. Right. Yes.

His idea of 9-7-0 sexy. Of a chat line. Have you guys ever called a chat line? I've never called. Have you? No, no, but I do have a story. No, wait, yeah, please tell your story you? No, no, but I do have a story. No, wait, yeah, please tell your story first. I had a friend named Mike Randall.

Mike Randall. Here comes Randall. He's a berserker. Do you remember that? Here comes Randall. He's a berserker. I think it's from Clerks. And so Mike Randall and I, we had somehow gotten a page.

One of us had ripped out of a dirty gallery or something like that. And we would go to the gas station on the corner of Cary Avenue and Lincoln Highway. 76 gas station. No, Clark. Clark gas station. I bet you could tell me what it smelled like. Clark gas station. We worked at Clark gas station.

The one in Rochelle eventually got closed down because they were selling drugs and not paying taxes. They had a pay phone and we would go and we would call the 1-900 numbers from the pay phone and then get as far as we could into the call before we would either get freaked out or they would want

a credit card number and then we would hang up. We did this for an hour. We rode our bikes. Did you ever get anything out of them before you had to pay just an erection yeah so my thing is like i this sounds i'm not trying to be creepy about it but growing up people always were like you like my phone voice sounds like a porn voice i guess sure you have a great voice it's it is tends to be soft So my voicemail is like, hi, friendly,

cute. Hi, you've reached Natasha Chandell. That is, that is. And so then people would always be like, Hey, but my thing is I don't like,

I don't like loud noises. So I, I tend to be very like calm on the phone. Cause I just, I don't like hearing it back. And so I actually wanted to do a podcast. No joke. Talk to Jason about this, where I was like, I wanted to do a podcast. No joke. Talk to Jason about this where I was like,

I wanted to do like a porn meditation podcast where I'm just like, I just do a two minute positive affirmation in a porn voice. The dick is in your ear right now. The dick is right in your ear. Yeah. No, but it's just like,

you're going to have a really wonderful day today. You should do this. When you wake up in the morning, I want you to see the bright lights in front of you. You have a great day. You could also do two minutes up top and two minutes at the end for people to go to sleep. Yeah. Yeah.

Damn. Call it bookending. You start and end your day. Which, by the way, could be like a sexual act. A sexual guy in the front. You don't want to know what bookending is. Okay, where was I? Don't get caught watching The Binding Drive. The

second operator, the guy, was like, no, I don't want to fool around. No, I don't. Officers sent to Duddles' Milwaukee area residence discovered him, not surprisingly, in an intoxicated state. They also found a glass smoking pipe and THC in the apartment. According to court records, Duddles has been charged with a pair of misdemeanor drug counts

and unlawful phone use. He was also hit with a bail jumping charge for violating the terms of his release. You called them, do you? Yeah. In a pending criminal case in which he faces disorderly conduct charges and criminal trespass.

Believe it or not, somebody said, get out of here and don't come back, and he didn't listen. He didn't listen. He trespassed. In November, Oh, God. Oh, boy. Duddles called the non-emergency line to, quote, tell dispatchers

that he loves them. He also asked for the number for YouTube so he could watch Grateful Dead videos. You are high as fuck. I love this guy. Can I call YouTube and see if they can see if I can watch it? Tell them they're doing a good job. I just want to touch a

gray. I just want to say this is awesome doing a good job. I just want to touch a grave. I just want to say this is awesome. Me and my uncle. I want to watch Grateful Dead videos. When you can't control your... When it gets really loud all of a sudden. It's about... See, Natasha wouldn't like that.

She doesn't like it when it gets really loud. A cop sent to Duttles' home warned him not to contact the police department unless he had a legitimate need for assistance. At that point, Duttles reportedly admitted that he loved talking to dispatchers and officers. But it's the non-emergency line. But maybe that's his fetish.

Like for him, when he calls someone who's like in a person of authority, person of authority who's doing their job, how long he can get them to stay on the line is a thrill for him. Yeah. Or how long he can distract people from doing other really important work. Or admit his love for these people.

And how long can he then keep it going after that? There's probably like a, this is naughty. I shouldn't be doing this type of a feel to it. As reported in these pages, Duddles called 911 in November 2013. And we will find out what that was right after we take a quick break. Hey, guys. Welcome back to the show. First of all, you have a podcast.

Oh, yeah, I do. Please tell our fans what it is. It's called Kinda Dating. It's a comedy dating podcast. Where cool guests and I break down one dating topic per episode and the joke is we try to figure out why the fuck we all have commitment issues because nobody says they're in a relationship anymore everybody's like i'm kind of dating this guy i'm kind of dating this girl so um you know no one will jump all the way in no not anymore why is that just because people want to keep their options open?

Yeah, that's it. People are pussies. That's a fact. That's really what the- When does it drop? It's every Tuesday. Okay. We've had 134 episodes.

Okay, get in now, then back catalog that thing. It's like how to slide in her DMs to sex addiction. We kind of go all over. Okay, so that I want to say, that I think plays a part. You know, people's fantasy about what sex is. There's so the access to it is with the internet or whatnot

is just so prevalent right now that they're like, I don't need to be in a relationship. I don't need to try and make something work. And this sort of comes back to like your guys' question of like, are people really dumb? And I definitely believe that, I think

that people are probably the same amount of dumb as before, but I think it's more infuriating now. Because you have the most fucking powerful tool in the world at your fingertips. Computer in your hand. You have a computer you can take everywhere with you.

Which we couldn't in 85. And there's no good ass fucking reason to be as dumb as people are or as uneducated or whatever. And so the same thing kind of works with like porn. It's like you watch something and how people have like forgotten the ability to use critical judgment

use critical thinking. Critical thought is what's so much lacking. Yeah. And you're like, this isn't completely real. Right. This is an angle. Or at all.

Yeah. I had a family member of mine like point out, it's not important what side of the fence it was on, but like a political thing about somebody that they were like didn't like. And I said, that's just not even close to true. And so I explained to them why that that was not true.

And then I just said in the nicest way, I was like, also, just remember, you are two clicks away from just typing that into Google and just seeing. It might keep you in a place like, wow, I don't know the answer. Or you will probably know the answer nine times out of ten right away. Yeah. And so I did it. And then I just sent them the link and i sent them the screenshot and was like see that fake news and they were like okay i'm like just that just just don't accept it no it's so true i went to a my girlfriend's house and her

family is conservative hey conservatives out there you know be you i'm not trying to judge you that said um they were conservative and very anti-Obama and uh you know I try to be really like peaceful with peeps and uh but they started saying a bunch of stuff yeah and one was like this really wild like accusation which is fine but I just very calmly was like I don't think that's true and they were like no I don't think that's true. And they were like, no, I don't know about that. And she ends up Googling it as she's like, no, it is. And she starts Googling it. And like 10 minutes later, she's like, oh, it's not. I can't find it.

And there was no need for an argument. There's no need for a fight. There's no need for hostility. I bet you told her in the calmest Natasha voice. It was like so. Yeah. Which, by the way, that has got to be infuriating to argue with you on that level. I never want to be in an

argument with you. You don't want to see the other side either. Oh really? Does it just all come out in like a crazy banshee? I'm like the calmest person until I'm not. Until someone pisses you off, forget it. I think you're right about this and then we'll get back to the story, but I think there is a

thing right now where we are – we're getting to a place where people don't want to do hard things at all anymore or difficult things that take a little bit of work. So it's like you have to leave your dog at home. You cannot bring your dog into this restaurant. It's easier if he just comes with me. And so now there's a dog in a restaurant like where years ago – we do a bit about this in our stand-up. If you walked a dog too close to a restaurant, the owner could be like, I'm going to shoot that dog. And you'd be like, I get it. You have an A rating.

You don't want this dog crapping around your door. So like now you can carry like a chihuahua and a baby Bjorn through a salad bar. And everyone's like, it's his emotional support. And it's like, look, how is he going to get to the garbanzo beans without having a nervous breakdown? I don't know. And so like it's hard. People used to like have to like dress a little beans without having a nervous breakdown? I don't know. And so, like, it's hard. People used to, like, have to, like, dress a little bit nice, you know, when you went to work. And now people are like, I don't want to wear sweatpants to work.

I'm wearing sweatpants to work right now. But I'm just saying, like, that's across the board. Well, a relationship is work. It's hard work sometimes, and it sucks, and you've got to deal with somebody, and you've got to deal with their crap, and you've got to really get into it. Or you can jerk off and watch movies. Actually, what I what i always tell people i'm like dating actually is not hard the actual process of dating isn't being half a human with somebody for an hour of your life is not hard no being in a relationship what's hard generally about relationships dating whatever is just managing your feelings that's all it is so it's like the process of communicating, not that difficult. It's that I sat

at a date and now I go, oh my god, I laughed in a way. I'm like, oh my god, I have the worst laugh. Why did I laugh at that time? And then that small thought always goes to, I'm going to die alone. Like every thought goes to I'm going to die alone. Slippery slope down to that point. And so you're like, even when you get in a

relationship, something goes wrong, it always goes to that. So you're like, it's like, I relationship, something goes wrong, it always goes to that. So you're like – I'm unlovable or I can't get there. Or the other thing is like sometimes if you care about someone, like wait until you have kids. Like there's times where you're like I don't know how to fit their life into my life, which I need to do these things. And these things are really important to me. How do I sublimate what I need for another person?

That takes a lot of work and that's super hard. People don't want to do it. People don't want to do it. Cause they're like, I don't have to do it. All right. So what's the name of the podcast? So people can check. Oh, kind of dating.

Kind of dating. Kind of dating. It sparked us to do have like a 10 minute discussion. And that was like, that's why this podcast is great. Check it out. Dan, let's get to the second half of the story. As reported earlier by thesmokinggun.com,

Duddles called 911 in November 2013 to report that he wanted quote, a female removed from his bed. What? The woman he added

was now snoring like a train and he wants her out. I've been there. He called 911 for a person sleeping next to him snoring. Let me just say, I've been there. Fair. See how I told you at the top, at first I felt like he wants her out. He called 911 for a person sleeping next to him snoring. I've been there. Fair.

See how I told you at the top at first I felt like he was a creep. Maybe he is, but he's definitely just a nut. He got a lady in bed with him. Wait, what do you mean you've... That was a joke, but were you ever there? No, my wife snores. There are moments where I just lose my brain because then you get in your own

head and you're like, well, I'm not going to sleep. I'm not going to sleep. Okay, but what would you guys do as dudes if there was a girl and she just wouldn't leave? Oh, she just wouldn't leave. What if that was the situation? That's a great question. Because you can't get physical. You can call 911 for someone.

You absolutely can't get physical and you absolutely can't start throwing her stuff out the door or down the street. Or what I would do is I would record me saying, I'm asking you nicely to leave. And then turn it on her. Turn it on her. And if she says nothing, say, okay. And then you keep that video. Or upload it to Twitter.

You say, let's go to lunch. But by the way. And then you leave the restaurant in an emergency that just happened. I'm sorry. There's 20 bucks for... I'm so afraid of people and the way they behave now. I'm like, she's come

back with a gun. She's come back with something. You can't break up with anyone. I feel like that's part of it too. People are like... I'm kind of dating because I don't want to then get to the point where I have to break it off and then this person will show up at work. People ghost people all the time because of that. And I'm like,

you should, if they seem crazy, ghost them. So this woman is probably trying to snore him out of this relationship. It's his house.

Duttles, seen above, told cops the pair had drank together, had relations, and she fell asleep. We drank together. We had relations.

We had relations. When Duttles could not roust the sneezing woman. Snoring. Sorry. Snoring. Rousting. Snoozing woman.

Rousting the snoozing woman. Who suffered from sleep apnea. Yeah. I don't know why they threw that in there. She didn't have her mask. She dies every 20 seconds for a second. That's horrible. Sleep apnea is bad.

He called 911. Police did not arrest Duddles. She's like, hey, babe, I forgot my CPAP machine. They explained to him that a snoring woman in his bed was not a law enforcement matter. We will get out of here on this. How old do you think Benjamin Duddles is?

How old do you think he is? By the way, the curious case of Benjamin Duddles, I think he's aging backwards. He will be an 80-year-old baby in two years. So, Dan, this is a trick question because he's aging backwards. Where's he at now?

Gosh, how old could he be? You can go first, take a third, wherever you want. I don't know, whatever, 36. 36? Okay, Jay, what do you think? That's a good age. You might be, I know you just tossed that off. You might be exactly right. What do we know about him? You know who didn't toss him off?

Old Snorri McGee over there. He's got priors. He doesn't like snoring women. Old Snorri Finkelstein over there. We both spend time together. He doesn't know how YouTube works. He loves Grateful Dead. I think he's 44.

I think he's 58. 58 years old. 58! Get out of here on this, Thomas. Benjamin Duddles. B-Duddles if you're nasty. B-Duds. Benjamin Duddle Wings is 47 years old.

Oh! That's a year younger than us. Oh my goodness. B-Duds. Oh man, I was three years off. That felt really, really good and satisfying. I felt like I was... That was so fun and I'm so happy we learned That felt really, really good and satisfying. That was so fun

and I'm so happy we learned more about your podcast Kinda Dating Natasha. Thank you so much. This is so fun. It just moves. It's a blast. We get to make fun of dumb people and double as people. Thank you guys so much. Oh shit, we gotta get back to work. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb

Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb Stick around, make a sound Come here down, it's Dumb People Town