Dumb People Town - DPT Mini - Tiger King Edition Episode 1

Episode Date: March 31, 2020

Dan, Jason and Randy give their take on Episode 1

Star Bands Out of There, a podcast network. Hey townies, welcome to a mini episode of Dumb People Town. The Tiger King Edition. There you go. This is a special drop into your feed because, as most of you know, we are watching the Tiger King with each other and, most importantly, with you. We're doing it. We did it live on Instagram Live, which was definitely... We're learning as we go.

We're going to try and figure out a setup next time where we can have microphones so we're not so far away from, so it's not so echoey. But this was our first venture into it. We're actually just figuring out how Instagram Live video works, but loved it. We actually went back through and read all the comments. So many of you participated, which was awesome. By the way, we are practicing safe social distancing we've been

away from each other this is the closest we've been yeah and nobody's really touching anything and we are purelling and washing all the time so uh let's talk about this first episode and do a little episode recap because we thought that'd be fun for all of you who are watching the show that a lot first of all the first five minutes of it was what you're going to see moving forward. Oh, I didn't pick up on that. That's what I gathered. It was like, this is what you're going to see. This was the life.

Didn't Perry Mason used to do that? Where you kind of see. Or that was the show up and for the whole show. For the whole show. And this is like, you can skip that intro every time as they say. Okay. They kind of did that with McMillions. But a lot of crazy stuff.

We came in loving Carol Baskin. Baskin. Baskin. Baskin. Baskin. By the way, I love Zach Galifianakis in Baskin. Heir to the Baskin Robbins fame. I did not know that.

Did you not know that? No. Carol Baskin? She's got one flavor, and that's take those tigers down. That's right. The biggest thing to me in this show, I mean, obviously, people are crazy and dumb. No, the biggest thing is the difference between people understanding the difference between

loving something and whether or not it's right. Yeah. It's not a... Because you love something doesn't mean it's okay. Yeah. I'm sure... Like, I love Kraft macaroni and cheese. Yeah.

I get to eat it like three times a year. Right. I sure Buffalo Bill loved the woman that he kept in the well inside of his house. Loved her. Loved her. She mattered more to him than anything other than the dog. You can't. And the bucket.

You can't keep her in a well. Right. In your house. To me, the moment. That's more apt. A couple moments stuck out to me as like, oh, this took a turn. That guy's shirt off. A guy with his shirt off.

No, that's different. We'll tackle him. We'll talk about that in a minute. We'll literally have to physically tackle him.'s his love since the time i was 14 i do i was gay all right great we congratulations it does make me kind of love you a little bit doesn't it also make you feel good to realize you can hate a gay person so there's like we've come so far it has nothing to do with this game right that's what i'm saying because remember the jackal the movie The Jackal came out.

And I think Bruce Willis was a gay character. And GLAAD at the time, it was still very much like people just offhanded hated gay people in our society. Or they were afraid of whatever bullshit excuse they had for not accepting them. And so GLAAD petitioned that movie to change that character and re-edit that movie to not depict that he was gay because he was a villain. We've come so far, thankfully, that your villain can be gay and that has no relevance on how much... Okay, there's a 20% chance after watching this first thing

that what if he's not the villain? Maybe there's this 10% chance. No, there is no percent chance. There's no way. He's firing guns at a mannequin. What you're trying to say is he might not be the only villain. Right, right. I'm willing to buy that. I'm willing to buy that.

I'm willing to buy that too, but what I think is fascinating is... Yeah, I kind of forgot that he was gay and I'm like, oh, this guy's crazy. This is what's so fascinating to me is that here's a guy who has no zoological training. Yeah, he calls himself a zoologist. His neighbor worked for the place in Florida

when he was in rehab. And so in therapy in Florida, which great idea. I'm going to go therapy. Where are you going to go? Florida. I don't even know if that is there. The next question out of someone who loves you's mouth should be why. From the gang that brought you It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

comes therapy in Florida. Therapy in Florida. There's always therapy in Florida. But think about this, Dan. This guy had like families, God-fearing families of people on his property. Coming multiple times.

Coming multiple times, letting their kids touch the animals they had. If he opened every show, and he kind of did by wearing those jackets, but if you open... Yeah, but those people also loved Paul Lind. Right. So if he opened every show by saying, when I was 14, I found out I was gay,

I could see that crowd of people just yelling boo and starting to shoot the tires. And I would say... Shoot him and shoot the tires. But you know what I would say to him? I'd go, keep... What is happening? I think on TV, guys, we're doing this on the block.

Guys, there's an emergency happening right now. Oh, my God. Oh, the show just restarted. Who cares? Who cares? Oh, my God. happening i think my tv guys we're this we're guys there is an emergency happening right now oh my god who cares oh my god tiger king was mad that we it was mad that we were talking about it and he's like starting his show to get us to stop he's clairvoyantly getting it no but to me isn't that the most fascinating thing they would let him do whatever they wanted to but if they knew he was over the fact that episode two starts with a 911 call? I think. I'm now titillated. I don't know if that was episode two or trailer. I don't know what that was.

But my thing is this. If he did that, I would be like, kudos to you, my fellow human. Great. Open doors. Never keep the beginning part where you tell everybody you're gay. Yep. Lose the animals. Yes.

Let me tell you something. you're gay. Yep. Lose the animals. Yes. Let me tell you something. When he put my son's head in that lion's head and my son got bit, I didn't blame him one bit. You know when I didn't trust him is when he said he was gay. Yeah, exactly. Oh, is that

when you don't... So like there's a... Okay, so Jay brings up a point that we made this comment several times. Okay, the people who are there are to blame. The people who are paying money to go to this guy's... Because this is the age-old question. Who is worse, the leader or the followers of the leader? That's right. So the people who

came to look at the animals in this guy's, essentially his backyard. It's not his backyard, but he's got cages erected that... It is not right for these animals to be where they are. And by the way, it's difficult for him. You have to hand slaughter cows.

You have to get moose and deer that have been hit by cars. You have to, there's so much that he has to do. But he has a gift shop. He doesn't have a gift shop. If someone in your family. Sex. Sex. Jail.

Jail. Would someone in your family say, we're going to go see some tigers today? No. At some dude's house? No. I've met members of your family sex jail jail would someone in your family say we're gonna go see some tigers today no some dude's house no i've met members of your family they would at some point in that conversation if someone invited them to go do that and say you want to bring your kids right your mom or your uncle ken or someone would have stepped in and be like we're not doing that we're not doing that that's a dumb idea our parents would never let us someone's gonna get hurt i don't feel safe doing it.

And then the next thing they'd say, your uncle Ken would be like, hey, you shouldn't have these things. Okay, so you bring up a good point. So for everybody, and I'm so glad we get to do this podcast to tell everyone we touched on it. A couple of things.

One, if you watch the feed, I understand a lot of you don't understand film perspective, but we are farther away than it looked in that frame. We are not sitting next to each other. A chair is far away and ends of a couch are being used. So as best we can, but also we addressed that we've done our best to do everything we can. So here's the other thing I would say. This story was sent to me so many times. I know. I'm sure. And I don't remember all the details. I remember reading it. Obviously, I don't forget that face. That hair.

Just the definition of beauty. Thank you. Thank you, Jesus. But I knew that it would be that the reason that ruled it out for us as a traditional Dumb People Town story is the animal cruelty aspect. And then I think there is obviously violence and things like that as well that just aren't things that we touch on in Dumb People Town. In the first episode, hey, you want to see something?

I just bought a snow leopard in a hundred degree van. Right. I might shoot that. Guys, I don't even tend to do stories where people were like, like it better be really funny. If, if, if, if it includes the fact that someone has a gun, the story better be really funny. Dan.

So my point is, is like, even if just on the, even if the article had just been him using an AK 47 to blow up like dummies of like human people, I would be like, no, we're not. Yeah. Yeah.

Cause I don't want to glorify the AK 47. The other thing, the thing is when that guy rolls open the van door and you see that leopard that I couldn't, I felt I have a bat in my house that was given to us by uh by nick the guy who owns uh not a hilarious not a flying bat no no not a bat like bat soup that started this whole fucking problem no i'm talking about a baseball bat and as that guy was doing that i imagined me swinging a bat as hard as i could hitting him in in the skull. I'm not a violent person, but I'm like,

man, I would love to beat him until he's dead. You cannot do that. And then call Carol Baskin and let that thing roam free on her property. We're going to end up hating Carol Baskin. I don't think we're going to like her either. I don't either. So my thing is like, here's my thing. She spent too much

time showing us her closet. My very first set of comedy, like real set, was with you guys at Comedy on State in Madison. And in that set, I, in a probably very non-funny way, tried to do a bit about how I don't think zoos need to exist anymore. It's a great idea. That's where, I know I should probably go back to it as a better comment. You should.

But my point is that that's how I feel even about zoos. This show will be your way in. Yeah. Dan, for real. Zoos were created on an educational level or just we didn't really care about animals. But that's what they keep saying. But that's the point.

That's the thing. But there's not that anymore. Because you needed, not needed, but people went and got a fucking zebra because no one in Cincinnati would believe they existed. Could see a zebra, that's right. And now it's like, one, travel is infinitely easier than it was before.

Although not anymore. Right, not currently travel is infinitely easier than it was before. So go to fucking... Although not anymore. Right. Not currently, but I'm seeing it usually. And also, the internet. Planet Earth is every zoo you'd need. You don't need to put these animals in cages just for people to fucking look at them. Now, if you are telling me we are a rescue place,

these animals would not survive in the wild. That's what Carol Baskin is saying. I would have to do more research, but I've been to Animal Kingdom and Disney World. It seems to me that that is a true habitat that they have created. There's not like a cage and some people might educate me and say other things,

but San Diego, and I'm not 100% comfortable with it either. I'm not saying that, but I don't love it. I just think it seems to me that there are rules where they're like, well, this sea lion could not survive in the wild. So it lives here.

And I would be like, okay, that's better than it being being dead but if you're telling me we just got all these animals or we had these animals mate so that we can make more of them you're just fuck off yeah he said you can make a hundred thousand dollars off this tiny cub right here that's something that in those like in the set few weeks right in a few weeks that they're this old you made a hundred thousand dollars off this. So he sees the money of what you can make off that. But that's what they keep saying. And so Carol Baskins is getting- That's what I wonder. She's getting all the other animals.

Like if she saved them from bad places, do they know how to live anywhere else? No, they don't. But what she, I think her argument is this, Dan and Randy. I think her argument is i'm rescuing these animals and then i don't have tens of thousands of dollars to feed these animals i don't have the money it takes to build up the habitat that we're in give them what they need give them the amount of food that they need the guy said ten thousand dollars a month to feed these tigers except for joe zadek says he does it three

thousand a month but ten thousand a month tiger well no when you don't feed tigers they start to get hungry and they start to go crazy oh shit so so so this woman in my opinion is trying to raise the money to take care of these tigers and to and and take care of these animals and give them what they need to have but here's my life and don't do shows like for this example like create some sort of trolley trans system that's surrounded by like a fence or whatever that has bridges so they can animals can cross over and you say hey so we provide four tours a day we're gonna go out just so you know we don't control these animals they live in this habitat so you might see one you might not that's right there's no guarantee it's almost like whale watching you don't it's a crap shoot you spend three hundred dollars to go whale watching you might have one

of the greatest experiences of your life or they might just all be underwater which i've seen a bunch of which i've seen a bunch of whales and it is amazing yeah but that's but you never knew right which is also kind of the magic of it is the best you don't see any oh my god we saw one we saw a bunch just like in a cage even when you're helping it i just it's still problematic for me i guess if she is taking these animals from people who otherwise wish that i could see from their perspective that they would say carol Baskin be Robin. We had to bring a carry on to get to that joke, but it was worth it. Carol Baskin be Robin. Okay, so...

Carol Baskin Robin me in my life. Let me ask you guys this. First of all, who's your favorite character so far? Woman with half an arm. It seems that it's no one's business with by the way i think that's a man i think that's a woman that's a woman it's a who it maybe it's a day but they uh or she they uh um i would if they were like oh this is from earlier like that has nothing to do with even working i'm just gonna say this and i and i and i've never had

half an arm so i don't know how sure i don't know how difficult and i also know that they're out working with and maybe they just maybe she just got interviewed at that point right but that was the dirtiest stump i've ever seen in my life in my life it was the dirtiest stump I've ever seen. I think my favorite might be Eric Kirkham. Yeah. The Billy Bob Thornton-looking narrator. Do you know who Burt Sugar is? No. Burt Sugar.

Jay, get a picture of Burt Sugar. You kept saying that during the thing, and I felt bad that I didn't get the reference. Burt Sugar is a famous boxing writer. He was a reporter, a boxing writer. Oh, I think he passed away. Would he wear the Fandora? He would always wear the hat.

The Fandora. Always wear the hat. Yes. That's Burt Sugar. not look like burt sugar doesn't he look like the joker with his makeup off in that photo you just showed me um yeah that's a very good call anyway so i am excited like carol's husband so also by the way right now we're trying to make sense of this and for those of you who have watched the entire series, you're probably like, you guys are getting all this shit wrong, which I love. I love.

So this is where we're at right now. This is a snapshot. This is what I love when people are like, you guys are way off. I'm like, well, we know exactly what you knew after watching one episode. We're allowed to be way off. I love how possibly way off we are.

Right. And I also think. Love it. Burt Sugar. You got gotta look him up look up bert sugar and you'll know i keep saying bert sugar every time you love that we're way off i love that we're way off and i can't wait to get this is like a a picture out of focus yeah that is so we're making snap judgments about and saying what we as we start to see little pieces of it start to come in focus so so that's what we're doing. Yes.

And I want everyone who listens to this and who listens to the feed and whatnot, we will post up when we're going to watch the second episode. It may be Tuesday or Thursday. Yeah, we're looking at maybe Tuesday the 31st. Tuesday the 31st, last day of March, we'll watch. Or Thursday the 2nd. Just follow the Dumb People Town pages and us for updates. Follow the Dumb People Town Facebook page, Dumb People Town Instagram page.

It's DPTPodcast on Twitter. And Dumb People Town Facebook page, Dumb People Town on Instagram. All of us. This is, and we've said it before, this is one part Cheap Seats, one part Dumb People Town. We're going to try and get the sound a little bit better. All parts Tiger King.

That's it. This is a special event. Last question for you guys really quick, and then we'll wrap it up. No, but seriously my favorite guy who's my favorite that or uh is there any big turns you think anything big predictions you have baskins someone not live through the end of this it feels like it's being documented in real time carol baskins asexual husband may be my favorite character oh okay yeah he's pretty any predictions or favorite character. Ooh, okay. Yeah, he's pretty supportive. Any predictions or favorite character, Jay? I mean,

there's no bounds to my hatred for the Tiger King. I hate him so much, and so my question is, will this series make me love him at some point? I don't think so. I don't think so, but that is the question.

We should check in every episode to measure. Where is Jason? Where's my hate on the hate? Where's your hate spectrum? Where's your hate? It's deep in hate right now, but I would say, I don't think it ever comes back to love.

No, I like Carol Baskins. I like, I like her wardrobe and I like her approach. I like those blouses. You're a blouse man. And I want to also know how much does this uh documentarian insert himself because he's already been on camera michael cohen looking motherfucker yeah he's been he's on camera some

so this guy's trying to insert himself a little bit into this thing but that python that they pulled out that might be my favorite character by the way it was like eating like three dogs carol baskins could have been in that python yeah we don't know all we know we don't know that's a good twist that could have been a bas Python. Yeah. We don't know. We don't know. That's a good twist. That could have been a Baskins Python. Okay, great. So that's our first wrap up for this. Please, no spoilers in any of our feeds. We want to watch it with you guys and experience it as we go. And I will say this, Dan, my brother-in-law, David Zucker, who's fantastic, wonderful dude. He's a doctor. He's on call. He's on the front line. Front line is doing hard work, but he said it was a particularly slow time he had already watched the tiger king but he said it was super fun to go

back and watch it with us because you're watching us experience it so it's fun to do it if you've never seen it so experience it with us and it's really fun to do if you're already ahead of us go back and watch it with us yeah because that's what's so fun thank you guys so much for letting us do this type of stuff with you. This is like a Dumb People Town docu-series that we get to sort of go through with you. We love doing it. Keep checking for updates of when we're going to do the next

episode, and oh shit, we gotta get back to work. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb