Dumb People Town - Fahim Anwar - Two Tattoos and a Truth

Episode Date: December 25, 2018

This week, comedian Fahim Anwar joins the show!In Story 1, a naked man sneaks around before munching on some ramen.Story 2 brings us a widows who holds onto her late husband's... tattoos.Story 3 is the age-old tale of a wedding crasher.

Dan and Ran and Jay will share Tales of folks so unaware They lack in grace and sometimes choose The life they choose will make the news Breaking down each epic fail In Florida there's half-price bail I'm happy to say they Couldn't make this up

So listen to our podcast Dan with co-host Our man Dan Man, jerk, don't be a jerk Cause when the music hits the funny hits So listen to our podcast band with co-host Armand Dan. Man, don't be a jerk. Because when the music hits the funny hits, we are going to take you down. Stick around. Make a sound.

Talk your downies. Dumb People Town. Hey, townies. Welcome to another episode of Dumb People Town. Population you. Population Fahim Anwar. Hello. Dude, I'm so happy that you are here to do this show with us.

It's a long time coming. We tried to coordinate this over the summer, but I'm glad we coordinated it. Now, after your special is out, you did a sketch special with some of my favorite people in the world. Yeah, they're my friends, and we were doing YouTube stuff way back in the day, so it's very cool that we got to do it for Comedy Central.

Goatface. Goatface, yeah. And I wanted to call it Goatface Boy for some reason. Goatface Boy. You wanted to marginalize me? Yes, I wanted to take you down a knee. I did not. Thank you for that. Amazing.

First of all, you're a phenomenal stand-up, and I think I was reading somewhere where someone asked Bill Burr, who are your favorite young stand-ups, and he mentioned you was, like, reading somewhere where, like, someone asked Bill Burr who your favorite young stand-up star is. Yeah, that was fucking on the left field. And I was like, wow, dude. I didn't even know

you watched other people do their sets. I know, I know. For real. Well, maybe because he's big enough to just roll into a set and split.

Oh, no, I know. Yeah, like, once you reach a certain level. He sold out the fucking forum. I know. For Christ's sake. Yeah, normally when certain guys get

to a certain level, they can just go into any show, do a set, and they bounce. They don't really stick around. They're so busy. They're past that point in their career, really. I just love that he picked up on what we all, of course, have seen and known for a long time, which is you are – the reason Jay and I, I think we were watching,

we were on a show at the Improv Lab together with you. and I think we were watching, we were on a show at the Improv Lab together with you. And it just, your material, it's so in our zone and in our lane, is that you present a premise and then you love to act out. So do we. The act

outs of your premise is, to me, it's so beautiful because you can see you having so much fun with it. And it's a logical jump to the sketch world for you. For sure. I think the premise kind of, I always say with younger comics who are physical, earn your act out. Yeah.

Because sometimes you'll just see them flailing around. And there's no foundation there. Dan is so good at in one sentence or in one phrase telling you everything you need to know about the person. So once you say about like a cop, you know, a cop at Midway Airport that he is the type of guy whose belt doesn't fit. Now you know. You got everything. You're telling more of my good jokes, Randy. I'm sorry, Dan.

It's a great guy. Daniel Van Kirk. And then when you see him, you then are like, I know exactly who this guy is. And it's just pinpoint. That's why he's so good on this show because we believe that the world's getting dumber. Yeah, we believe the world's getting dumber. That's why I'm so happy that you are here with us to try and help us figure that out. I think we'll figure it out by the end of the episode.

I think we will. And we'll get more into your special and where people can check that out because it is fucking awesome, Goatface. But we'll get into that later. But let's jump into a story right away. Shall we, Dan? Okay, you ready? Here we go. This was sent in by Philip Owens at PROwens813.

PROwens813. Thanks, Phil. Thanks, dude. These are dumb ears on the ground. These are what? Our dumb boots on the ground. I see. They sent them in to me.

Hashtag dumbpe town at Daniel Van Kirk. And if you're the first one to send it in and it fits the bill. Here's the beauty where I was like, Dan, do you have enough stories? He's like, it's 2018. I'm not running out of stories. I'm people doing shit where you're like, why'd you do that?

Here we go. St. Petersburg. It started with chicken wings, a beer, and a burglar. Is this Russia, by the way? Yeah. It went downhill from there. How can it go downhill from there? Chicken wings, a beer, and a burglar. I thought it was going to be a burger.

I know. Nice little turn there, huh? It might be the Hamburglar. That's true. Yeah. Can we get some clarification? Is this the Hamburglar? It is not the Hamburglar. burger. I know. Nice little turn there, huh? It might be the Hamburglar. That's true. Yeah. Can we get some clarification? Is this a Hamburglar? It's not.

It is not the Hamburglar. Okay. The Hamburglar. A St. Petersburg police officer was investigating a November 6th, now this is key, November 6th break-in at the Chataway restaurant, reviewing surveillance video that shows the burglar devouring a plate of chicken wings and enjoying a beer inside the kitchen. Well, you leave that out for the, don't you leave that out for the nighttime burglar?

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like you leave out cookies for Santa. Yeah, that's where that's going to happen. They come and show you how shitty your locks are. That's right. Yeah, it's a trade-off. They steal gifts instead of leaving them. He's a bizarro Santa.

They exit through the chimney. So the burglar, they see the burglar in the video devouring a plate of chicken wings and enjoying a beer inside the kitchen. By the way, to enjoy a beer, that takes time. You can't just, yes, you can chug a beer, but chugging is not enjoyable. Sure. No. A beer bong is never a joyful experience. Right.

Right. It can be a good time. You take a sip. You allow the foam to be on your upper lip for a second before you, you kick back. Usually, like, take a drink and then exhale while looking around, like, off into the distance. Well, that shows you how good this guy is where he's like, I got time for a beer. That's right. Yes.

This is my MO. You know, in like a moment, he finished a wing, cleaned himself off, took a sip of beer and sat back and thought to himself, this is my time. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That one was for me. I think when he first started doing it, he was doing shots just because he didn't know how much time he had. Right. So wings are like a shot.

He realized he can sit. He got better and better at it. Two wings, one shot. Now he's like, I'm going to eat this whole plate of wings. Yeah. What could go wrong? Well, so this happened on November 6th, right? We see the guy eating the chicken wings, drinking the beer.

But then... What if it's a ghost? I'm sorry. Can I just... You can never say sorry. Can I put that out there? You can. Yeah. But then the officer stumbled across another incident from the night before. What? So the cop's supposed to look at stuff

from November 6th and then decides, I guess, to just keep rewinding. Let's rewind. Which means if it goes to the night before, this cop had to rewind all the way through an entire day's worth of business, and then the morning, and then through the night. I feel like he knows too much.

This cop might be an inside job. The officer stumbled across another incident from the night before. This is not what he was called for, but that would make it November 5th. Good police work. The video, this is from November 5th now, shows a man riding his bike up to the restaurant at 3058 22nd Avenue South. So put that on the Dumb People Town walking tour. Pedaling around the parking

lot for 10 minutes, then slipping through the back gate after wandering around for a He was pedaling around so he could be seen. Yes. You know, the way you should. Right. Make sure everyone gets a good look at your face. If you're breaking into a place and you're going from cover to the place you're breaking into, never take a direct route.

By the way, this is, and this is this year? Yeah. This is right around the election, so there's a lot of stuff happening. This is November 5th. This is the night before the election. Before election on the 5th, and then this is the night of the election, so maybe he was like nervous about the blue wave, and it happened,

and he was like, I'm going to celebrate. Yeah, he didn't have a stationary bike. He goes, let me just do it in circles. This is my Peloton. For 10 minutes, then slips through the back gate. I'm going to go on a limb here and say the Chataway, not the best security. No.

After wandering around for a bit, he opens the door to a shed for storing odds and ends. What is this guy, Greenlee writing this? We know what a shed is. We know what a shed does. And removes them one by one. Takes everything out of the shed. God knows why.

Zool knows why. That was my favorite Saturday Night Live sketch. To get off the shed? Get off the shed. Get off the shed. Get off the shed. That's in his audition. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. That's pretty cool. It's an audition piece. We asked Will what are you looking at in your own brain when you're looking out in the audience. He's like, we were looking at it. He's like, I always pictured it as like a tiny, like almost a toy shed. And he's like, get off the shed. Brandon, Michael, I need you guys to be buds.

I need you to get off the shed. I will punch you in the face. You know, get off the shed. Get off the shed. Well, this guy get off the shed. I will punch you in the face! If you don't get off the shed! Get off the shed! Well, this guy goes into the shed that stores Hansen in. Get out of the shed! And removes them one by one. Then the man gains access to a restaurant bathroom and exits without his clothes.

No one knows why yet. He's like a reverse Superman. Yeah. He proceeds to sit naked was that the original transitioning can we say that Superman transition into a superhero

why is that that's not minimizing you're right it's actually elevating it he proceeds to sit naked at one of the restaurant's picnic tables and digs into a meal he brought with him. He doesn't need a place to eat it. You want this guy to, like an animal, eat it out in the parking lot?

You want to guess what he brought with him? Yeah, let's guess. Fahim, what do you think he brought? What do you think his to-go lunch is? I'm going to say a sandwich or McDonald's. Ooh, okay. I'm going to say Subway. Sandwich or McDonald's?

Ooh, okay. I'm going to say Subway. By the way, am I the only one who wants to try the meatball sub on cheesy garlic bread at Subway? Wait, is that a new thing? That's a new thing. I will try. Guys, I got to go. See you guys later. Peace.

I want to tell our listeners, too, guys, don't worry. You're not freaking out. Jason had to deal with something. He'll be here any moment. I guarantee there's people who are like, where's Jason? Jason's no longer part of this podcast. He's exiled out of town. Fahim, you want to be our third?

Sure. How many times has Fahim been asked that in his life? Be the third? Always the third wheel, never the second. Yeah, but depending on the type of third, it can be a good night. Fahim has a phenomenal bit about not being comfortable being in an orgy.

Yeah, I was like uh i don't think i could do orgies i'm just gonna be afraid of being the guy who finishes first yeah what do you do he's like yeah and you're just looking around you're like all right i guess i'll be in the other room yeah you guys gonna keep yeah because you're my ride you come back in you're like anybody finish it yeah no all right does anyone right. Does anyone want something to eat? Yeah. Look, I hate to be that guy, but does anybody have the Wi-Fi? Could I just, could I, stop moving for just a sec.

Could I just, well, you're my ride, dude. So I'm just saying you don't need to hurry, but I'm ready to go, obviously. One of you guys is boxing me in. Just whenever, whenever you're ready, just. Or just give me the keys and I'll move it. Just tell me which one your pants is. I'll sift through it in the pile. While people are just furiously going at it.

The food that he brought with him was a, I'm going to say it wrong. I don't eat this. Maruchan Instant Lunch Ramen. Oh, yeah. Maruchan. Maruchan. It's like instant noodles. Instant ramen.

But yeah, Jason will probably never come back. So the listeners should get used to his absence. He'll be gone. I'm back, guys. Hey. Oh, shit. Welcome in to his absence. He'll be gone. I'm back, guys. Hey! Oh, shit. Welcome in. How's the car?

Battery alive. Okay. I got a new battery. Good. Just in time to turn my car back in. Yay. So to bring you up to speed, Jason, a guy broke in on November 6th. A guy broke into a restaurant.

A cop came to watch the security footage. A cop decided, you know what? Why don't I just keep watching older and older security footage? Found out that the night before, a call which he has not been asked to respond to, a man rode a bicycle around the parking lot, then broke into a shed, then went into the restaurant,

got naked, and is now eating ramen on a table. And this is not why the cop was called to this restaurant. Naked ramen on a table. That has got to be a sexual position. For sure. I took her, I did her naked ramen style on a table. That has got to be a sexual position. Sure. For sure. I took her. I did her naked ramen style on a table.

So the guy is now naked. He changed in the bathroom. He's eating ramen on one of the restaurant's picnic tables. If food drops onto a table when you're at a restaurant, don't eat it. Don't eat it. This is the lesson. If he's sitting naked on the table, Tony.

I'm going to tell you, I probably eat it every time. Stop. I do. Don't. The video also shows him. This is the lesson. If he's sitting naked on the table, Tony. I'm going to tell you, I probably eat it every time. Stop. Stop. I do. Don't. The video also shows him, this is the naked guy, again, which the cop is witnessing and not supposed to be called, therefore. The video also shows the naked man playing the bongos.

Also naked. Is that Matt McConaughey? It might be Matt McConaughey. All right. All right. All right, man. I'm just living, man. I love it.

Quote, he came in with pants on. Wait, why is he doing Carl's Jr. voiceovers? Is he? No. Oh, yeah. Is he really? Let's just take a pause right here.

He's come a long way from the naked bongo thing. It's pretty crazy how we society just gloss over certain things and not others. I forgot he was naked bongo guy.

Yeah. Once you do True naked bongo guy. Yeah. Once you do True Detective, that season. Season one. Once you go Lincoln Lawyer. Nah, but was he still bongo man before True Detective? Yes, he was. But Lincoln Lawyer helped. Lincoln Lawyer helped.

I'm going to tell you this. He did the wedding planner. Yeah. Well, he was like a rom-com guy for a long ass time. Failure to launch. Failure to launch. Failure to launch. Failure to discharge. I think it's failure to discharge.

That's hard. And how to lose a guy in 10 days. 10 days, yeah. So Carl's Jr. is a step up from that. So observed a naked man. So here's what they go. Quote, he came in with pants on, but he rode off on the bike without pants.

Which had to be sexual. Chad away server Chad Pearson said, I'm not sure if he took his pants with him, but we didn't find him. We still don't know where his pants are. So how did he go into a bathroom, get naked, never go back into that bathroom, and they don't know where his pants are? That's magic. He ate pants are. That's magic. He ate his pants. That's the only logical explanation. Guys, case closed.

They bring you in for the hard cases. Listen, damn it. That's your solution for every problem. He ate his pants. He also didn't bring bongos with him. Guys, I've been at this 35 years. He ate his pants. Where are the bullets?

He ate the bullets. He spray painted a few chairs, the bongos, and a pickle jar, but his handiwork was barely noticeable. Manager Amanda Keto said, she's on that keto diet, everything was put back so neatly. In fact, it was four hours before anyone noticed he had even been there. So he brought bongos? No, those were there. He spray painted them a little bit and he spray painted some of the chairs a little bit

and he obviously left with his bike and no one ever noticed his pants so they just did not know he was there. This is the weirdest crime ever. Amanda said and also still not the crime that started out this story. He didn't steal it. He brought out this story. The art piece. He brought his own lunch.

Yeah, the breaking and entering is a crime. We would not have known about the naked guy without the cop finding that video, Amanda Kito said. This is, to me, like skinny dimming without water. Sure. Right? Police identified the man, but did not release his name publicly.

Kito declined to give his name and said that the restaurant will not press charges because he caused no harm. Quote, his goal was to not break in. His goal was to just hang out at the Chataway. But he did break in. That's completely wrong and false. Let me ask you, would you rather he did this at high noon, lunchtime? The nude part, no. The rest, I don't care.

If they got bongos at the restaurant, play them. Don't you ever wonder if somebody's going to start taking all the kitsch hanging off these ceilings? You mean the sunglasses off the moose? Yes. Guys, let's take the sunglasses off the moose on this one. He ate his pants. What about the first guy? Well, they want you to know the police are still trying to catch him.

He enjoyed a plate full of chicken wings and some beer and stole stuff, including. That's what it says. Stole stuff. That's good journalism. That's just really good journalism. Including cash chips, a laptop, a tablet, and a grocery bag he filled with beer. He made himself at home, Keto said. He spent over an hour just milling around,

going room to room, and eating and drinking while he did it. The man also tried unsuccessfully to access a safe by using his hands, a pot handle, and tongs. How are you going to open a safe with a pot handle? Here's what I got. I got a pot handle. What's a pot handle? Is this like an

oven mitt kind of? No, a pot handle. Just a handle of a pot. So he's holding the pot. You're holding the pot. It's too dumb for you to not figure it out. I couldn't even rationalize. He's holding the thick part of the pot, and he's jamming the handle into the thick. And then tongs, too.

Tongs. To open them safe. Yeah. He doesn't want to touch. He's using the tongs. You don't want the prints on there. That's right. He's using the tongs to like adjust the the code

I don't yeah, I know but I still how great would it be if it worked dude. It's not gonna You were saying like that's out of oceans 11 or something Keto is confident that even though the two incidents happen back to back, they are not connected. They literally are connected. They are. Well, they're connected by location, but they're not. And time. But the people who are doing them probably have nothing to do with each other.

Also, don't you love that? So the person who broke in, spray painted stuff, and got naked, and then sat naked on a table. Ate ramen. Ate ramen. They're like, we don't care. That's fine. They didn't want to break in. They just wanted to hang out.

And then the other person, they also seemed too chill about it. This is the final quote. We'll get out of this. I blame our restaurant for being too nice of a place to hang out. Guys, maybe we should be less inviting. You're actually very close. This is the final thing. Quote, I used to always joke and say that if you're going to break into the Chataway,

to make sure and grab a beer, and it finally happened. I never said grab a laptop and a tablet. Which they seem to not even give a shit about. Instant ramen. Oh, my. That is just naked. So the concept of the show Naked and Afraid. Love it.

That's my on-the-road watch right there. That's still on. When I'm in a hotel in a city doing shows, I will watch Naked and Afraid. And you'll get naked just like you're a superman? Yeah. I'm going to have a robe. You're naked and entertained. Yeah.

I think they should change the name of the show of Naked and Afraid to Look How Much Weight They Lost. It is always staggering. Does anybody gain weight on that show? No. What are you doing? You're playing this wrong. It goes from 3.2 to 6.6. They can't find one of the contestants? I would call the show

Can She Put Up With His Mansplaining? They get afraid. The part that pisses me off most about the show is when two people are on there and they're always cold. They get so cold. What is the premise? 21 Days in the wild with no clothes on you can bring one survival tool with you.

A knife. Are these friends or are these random people? No, two random strangers. So I always like seeing them meet because you're always like who's going to hug

and who also is going to own it and be like let's look at each other let's look at each other and get this over with. But my thing is they're always cold because it always gets down

to like 52 degrees or even worse. And you can see the ones that refuse to use body warmth. And I'm like, before you leave the show, tell the person in your life. By the way, the guy doesn't have to be the spoon in the back. No. The woman can be the spoon in the back. It doesn't matter.

And you can also. These people are like, I'm married. We can't hug. I'm like, then you're going to die. You're going to be somebody. Not in this show, obviously, but in life, you're going to die. Because sometimes you just have to do it. You shouldn't have done this show. If you're married

and you're going to do Naked and Afraid with a private sister, what a chill life. Hey, babe, I want to do this show Naked and Afraid with some other woman.

Oh, that's cool. Send me a postcard. If my significant other said to me, we are, if you spoon, we're over, I'd be like, we're over now. Just be gone by the time I get back. I'm just going out there and trying to live. I'm trying to survive. That's right.

She should have never let him go in the first place. All right. Seems like a conflict of interest. Naked on a table. That's the first story. Naked and unafraid. Naked and unafraid with a bowl of ramen. All right. The first story down in the books for him on OnWire is and unafraid. Naked and unafraid with a bowl of ramen. All right. The first story

down in the books for him on OnWire is with us. We'll be back with more Dumb People Town right after this. Stick around. Make us down

for more Dumb People Town. Hey, guys. Welcome back to DPT. We want to remind people that we will be in San Francisco for Sketch Fest on Friday, January 11th. We are

reworking our guest for the show because Ron Funches had to jump. We had a conflict. There are great people up there. I guarantee it will be a great show. Let's fill it. It's a 10.30 show. It's a 10.30 show at Cobb's Comedy Club. It'll roll into our birthday, which is January 12th. Somebody can bring

German chocolate cupcakes for your guys' birthday, I would appreciate that. I don't know what you guys want for your birthday, but I would like that. Fahim Anwar is with us. He has a great special that recently aired on Comedy Central. It's a sketch special, but you can watch it on ComedyCentral.com. It's just in front of the paywall now, so you don't need a

Comedy Central login. You can watch it for free now. It's called Goat Face. And like I said, your stand-up to me is stand-up that lends itself so well. To sketch, yeah. Sketch and act-outs

and whatnot, but Hasan Minhaj, I mean, just great. Ahmed Barucha. Or, Hasan, I love Ahmed though. Yeah, I love him too.

I thought he was like working on it or something. No, I think he's doing, what is that, the Nick Rutherford show. Yeah, he's in Dream Factory. Dream Factory.

Sorry. Or Dream Corp. Dream Corp. We figured it out, guys. Guys, we did it. We did it. So it's me, Hasan Minhaj from Daily Show

who also has Patriot Act Now on Netflix. Oh, yeah. And then Aristotle Atheris and then Asif Ali. Yeah, Asif Ali. So yeah, we were doing YouTube stuff

way back then and it's cool that you get to make a TV. Like bigger budget, bigger ideas. There's some ideas that I wanted that I have in my phone

that I always write down stuff just living day to day yeah and I wrote this sketch like maybe eight years ago or something and just

we never had a budget because you're just limited by your imagination you're like I can't make that yeah yeah we can't make it and then once we got this we're like oh fuck

let's do this can we please do this yeah yeah what is the premise tease people with the premise without giving it away it's like this shootout it's like an? What is the premise? Tease people with the premise. Without giving it away. It's like this shootout. It's like an action movie shootout.

And it looks very true to form of like a scene out of Bad Boys or something. I love it. So just a very cinematic shootout. What we were talking about and why I feel like, you know, this is why I feel like Jay and I can relate to you on many levels. And it's certainly the show, the idea of the show that like four brown people making a sketch show. It's funny. It's nothing and it's something.

You guys just wanted to be a funny sketch show and the fact that it's coming from your perspective makes it unique and a different sketch show and it has a voice and a perspective that it's coming from. Because your view of the world is different from ours and that's beautiful. Just inherently in the way that we were brought up and some of the reviews and stuff, I think

it's kind of cool they've picked up on that. They kind of commend it. There's this point of view that hasn't been seen really in the sketch world. And just from us, we're not even really trying to. We're just sort of being true to us. That's right. And you can tell that it's not manufactured

or anything. It's genuine in the sketches we make but it's funny first it's funny first because we all grew up in America we have very American sensibilities and everything but we also happen to have this background so we can talk about certain issues that maybe an SNL couldn't because they don't have the racial

composition in their cast too your show is going to be different than Key and Peele, because their experience is different. Yes. And like same with Amy Schumer. Her show's great, because that's her perspective. That's right.

And like Chappelle's show, it's very unique to that POV. And when you have a singular less-cooks-in-the-kitchen type thing, you get some great comedy, I think. Totally. It's called Goat Face. Go check it out on ComedyCentral.com. Tell them to go make a series out of it. Yeah, go make a goddamn series.

Let's do that. Yeah, I would love to. Should we jump into another story? Let's do a story. We sent it by Catherine Tuck, at Catherine Lorna. Thank you, Catherine. So great.

Tuck rule. She does so much great stuff. The Tuck rule. Some people put a photo of their departed loved ones above a living room fireplace. Others spread the deceased ashes. She got a tattoo of him on her labia. Saskatoon tattoo shop owner.

Oh, my God! And also Saskatoon. I did not read this. That's the sheepdogs. Saskatoon. That's the Saskatoon way up there in Canada. Love the sheepdogs. Go see them any chance you ever get. Go check out all their music.

Yep, learn and burn. Saskatoon tattoo shop owner Cheryl Wenzel's late husband. I love her pretzels. Late husband and business partner Chris left her with far more unconventional instructions. He, there's a quote, he wanted to have his tattoos removed and displayed to the whole world, said the 40-year-old widow. Quote, he would always say, why get all these hours of tattoos put into me and nobody can see them? Why get buried with them?

Oh, I don't know. Because it's part of your skin? Yeah. How about take some photos? Yeah. Take some really nice photos and then hang those on the wall. The Wenzels were teenage sweethearts who stayed together for 23 years. That's beautiful.

In other words, big mistake. Should have dated other people. He was lead artist at the couple's Sask. In other words, big mistake. Should have dated other people. He was lead artist at the couple's Saskatoon business, Electric Underground Tattoo. That's a good name for a tattoo bar.

Agreed. She worked behind the scenes taking appointments and serving as his second eye as he bent over his designs. Wait, so he only had one eye? Yes. Honey, I'm just going

to be your third eye. Nope. That's reserved for when I take mushrooms. That's my third eye. You can't be that. Third eye open, baby. Can I be your fourth eye? No, that doesn't make sense.

The partnership came to an end last month. That's the most business-like way of saying somebody died. The partnership came to an end last month. We dissolved our company when he passed away. I foreclosed on my husband. Chris, 41, died of heart failure. Sorry. That left Cheryl to run the shop solo

and handle his complicated post-death request. This is kind of like a reboot of It's a Wonderful Life. Yeah. Dad dies, and now it's left to her. Otherwise, Potter. They'll side with Potter. I don't have your tattoos. Mama Dollar and Papa Dollar.

If we can't get these two tattooed on you, we're going out of business. Let's see. So she's left to handle the post. Seems to me if you died, no one would care. Well, Miss Wenzel, I'd say you're a girl whose ship has just come in. I hate old man Potter. Me too.

Quote, he had some really beautiful work, she said, of the tattoos that stretched from his neck down his lower legs. There were skulls on his hands, a Japanese warrior on his back, and two hawks fighting a snake on his chest, just to name three of many. What if one of those wasn't a tattoo? It's like two tattoos and a truth. The Japanese guy on his back was legit. That's a real dude. That's a real dude. He's the only Japanese guy in Saskatoon.

And now we've got to hang him on the fucking wall. He's like, I'm just happy for the job. I just got to get this Japanese guy off my back. I'm going to for the job. I just gotta get this Japanese guy off my back. I'm gonna show you guys a picture of the front of his. This is a lot of skin if you wanna get this

taken off of you. Also, these two birds are fucking going at this snake. Look at these. That's not even a fair fight, right? Two hawks versus one snake.

Two hawks v. one snake. That's not fair. He, by the way, is in better shape than I expected. Yeah, that's true. Am I right? Hawk v. snake. Oh, yeah, dude. That's not fair. He, by the way, is in better shape than I expected. Yeah, that's true. Am I right? Hawk v. snake. Oh, yeah, dude. That's kind of scary, man. 41,

and he's the one with the heart failure? I know. Silent killer. Agreed. Tattoos. I feel like heart disease attacked his heart like two hawks on a snake. Chris wanted all of them preserved. Cheryl first had to find a funeral home that would play ball.

I hope that's what she said. Now look, before we start talking numbers, I need to know if you guys are going to play ball. Are you guys down to play ball? If you're a funeral director and somebody comes in hoping you'll play ball, you're like, this is about to get bad. Nope. Except it's Canada, so are you guys ready to drop the puck on this? There you go. Hey, Dan, look, this is one of those times where you say to your partner,

I will absolutely do this when you die. And then as soon as you're dead, you're like, I can't do this. How many places do you think told her no? How many places? Are we guessing? Yes. You're a guess. You can go first, Tig, which is second, or third, whatever.

I'll go first. I'll say five places said no. Okay. Jay? Three places said no. Okay. Two places said no. Two? Jay? Three places said no. Okay. Two places said no. Two?

One of you is exactly right. Okay, so now we get to play another round of who do you think is right. Exactly right. This is tough. Because after I said five, I feel like that's a lot of... Yeah. I don't know if she would run around. Does she have access?

It's not like Starbucks where they're on every corner. She's also trying to run the shop. She's trying to run the shop. You've got a lot to do. I'm going to say I'm wrong. So... I said two. Jay said three. But three makes it seem like she tried quite a bit.

I'm going to go three. Okay. Jason, who do you think is right? Yeah, I think I'm right. Okay. I think I'm right. You think you're right, Ryan? Okay.

Stay with me. Tony, get your answers in right now because the amount of places that the new director of the tattoo shop after that partnership got dissolved, the amount of places, or funeral homes, rather, that she went to before she found someone who would play ball with her, the amount is five. Oh! Believe in yourself!

Believe in yourself, Ahim. Quote, I don't blame them, she said. Before a sixth, Morning Glory Funeral Services said it would allow the skin extractions to take place on its turf. Quote, we've never had a request like this, said funeral director Chelsea Krentz, adding that she knows of no similar procedure ever having happened at a Saskatchewan funeral home. I just like that there's, in this day and age, there's a first something happening. Like, this is the first time this has ever happened.

You're a part of a first. That's kind of cool. Cheryl also had to find a company to preserve the pieces of skin and prepare them for later display. Enter Kyle Sherwood, an embalmer from Save My Ink Forever based in Cleveland, Ohio. So this is a real thing.

So this is a market then? Do you have any tattoos? No. I don't have any tattoos either. Would you get one? I'm gonna. I will. Would you? I will. What are you gonna get? My first tattoo will be a peacock tattoo. For real? Yeah. It's kind of like a bit. It's like our family's. Because you love NBC? It's our family's like.

He's a network guy. He's a company man. He's a company guy. He loves NBC. I don't know if you. So the cabin up in Wisconsin, there's a little resort on the little lake that we first started going to when my mom was like five. And they have peacocks. And their logo is a peacock.

So just that place and that area. Where are you going to get on? Your lower back? No, I think I'm going to do either forearm or above the elbow. That's my first one. We made fun of this. Another one I want. I just want the words no man is a failure who has friends.

Which is a quote from It's a Wonderful Life. That's beautiful. Do you want me to cut that off of you when you die? Yeah. You want me to cut him off while he's alive? I thought you were dying. He'll grow back 12 years later. I made a terrible mistake.

Cleveland holding it down on the Save My Ink Forever company. Sherwood traveled north to Saskatoon to help Morning Glory with the procedure. So they're essentially, guys, he's a tattoo artist. We saw the picture. You're skinning him. Yeah. Completely. Yep.

Chris got it done on Halloween night, said Cheryl. That must have been fun. Then she says, of course. Do you think as he was cutting, as he started cutting the guy, he was like, ring, ring, ring, ring. Or it's like a nip tuck where he plays a CD and it's the monster mash. I was cutting off his skin. Fun one night.

Quote, at one point, the funeral director came out and said, we have some concerns. His body has gone through so much already. We're not sure

if we can get his back tattoo removed. You gotta get that Japanese guy off his back. But Cheryl was resolute. Quote, I just kept hearing Chris say, all of them.

I want them all. Which creeps me out on some weird level. It's like creepy Pokemon. Yes. I want them all. I want them all. I want them all. And I want it now.

Take my tattoos. I want it now. It was the largest skin removal job Sherwood's company had performed since launching in 2016. What happened in 2016? I'm trumping this. That's not a long time ago. It was a different time.

Even so, Sheryl was able to have an open... What part of 2016? I mean, because the world has changed significantly since November of 2016. Even so, Sheryl was able to have an open casket wake for Chris. What? So I guess neck down. Just like a blanket. What is around his body, though?

It's like the Mr. Show sketch. He jumped in acid because of one of your songs. I haven't thought about that in a long time. When we were on the set of Better Call Saul with Odenkirk, and we asked him about... People should go look up this sketch, if you don't know what we're talking about right now. It's called, like,

Titanica is the name of the band. Was his name Donnie? Donnie is the guy who won't stop running. No, but so this ran, look it up. So the metal band that the kid who was inspired by their song, he's their biggest fan.

He wants them to come to the bedside. So it's basically David Cross and they were making the costume for it, speaking of sketch comedy and Odenkirk's like, it should look like a wet cigar. That was a

wet cigar. You go, Mr. Show Titanica visits a fan. That's the first thing. Or just Titanica. It's there. It's so good. What they said was it's in front of the studio audience because it wasn't like a film sketch. And so underneath the –

David had to get underneath the table and just his head is popping out. So David's underneath there and then so is Jay Johnson who's like working the body with David there. And so they're under the bed and there's all these blankets on top of them, like so many blankets on top of Dave to cover the body. And to make it look like David's really in the bed. And they wheeled him out while they were doing something else. And the crowd didn't notice. And Odenkirk's like, the fact that they're not noticing what's going on means that when this gets revealed, he said when they opened the blanket, it was the loudest laugh he has ever heard in his life.

He's like, it blew him back. Like, he felt the power of the laugh just blow. And he was at Second City when Farley would come on and do Van Down by the River because he wrote that sketch. Yeah, he wrote it. And so he's like, I've seen powerful, like, roof-blown-off performances. That laugh for that thing was the biggest that he's ever experienced. That's great. So that was his body in the casket.

Yes. So that's what people are looking at in an open casket. Yeah. Even so, Cheryl was able to have an open casket for him. Quote, they handled him in such an amazing way, she said of the funeral home. My kids were just like, hey, Dad. That breaks my heart. Oh, I don't need to hear that.

The preservation process will take three and a half months. Chris's skin will come out like parchment paper, ready for framing in a UV-resistant frame, Sherwood said. Museum quality, he said. Sherwood wouldn't divulge exactly how the process works. He sure wouldn't. Quote, that's our secret sauce, if you will. I can't believe you didn't add Sky Brothers Me on that. What? You said Sherwood wouldn't reveal it. I was like, he sure wouldn't. Quote, that's our secret sauce, if you will. I can't believe you didn't add Sky Brothers Me on that. What?

You said, sure would, wouldn't reveal it. I was like, he sure wouldn't. You snuck that one. At Daniel Van Kirk for not getting that one. That's our secret sauce, if you will, said Sherwood. Bad choice of words. You don't know what's in the Big Mac sauce or the recipe for Coke, so we keep that secret. It's skin.

It's human skin. It's tattooed skin. That's why it's a symbiotic relationship. It's former tattoos. That's why Coke tastes so good. The final product shelf life is also unclear. Sherwood said the first skin sample tested before Save My Ink Forever launched is now five and a half to six years

old and looks as good as day one. So it's like guinea pigs. Still, he added, you wouldn't leave it sitting out in the sun unless you'll burn it. You want to treat it like a precious piece of art. Cheryl said she wants to unveil the finished pieces at the Saskatoon Tattoo Expo

this April before hanging them up at her tattoo shop. She estimated the whole process will cost her how much money? Oh, this is great. How much do you think it's going to cost her? Oh, yeah, I fucked up prices right. You want to go first, Tig, or third? Tig was in between us. Do you want to go in between me and Jay?

Sure. Okay, Jay, go first. Ah, man. It's like This is a lot. Your ass skinned. Yeah. Then she had to get it like treated. Preserved. Basically taxidermy. And framed in museum quality

UV protection. I'm going to say $26,000. $26,000. Fahim. I'm going to say $32,000. $32,000. Randyahim. I'm going to say $32,000. $32,000. Randy. I'm going to say $8,500, which I know that sounds low compared to what I was guessing,

but it's still a lot of money. What did I say? I would say if you were to go get, like our dad had a fish, he caught an eight-pound German rainbow trout that he sent away to be done. I think that cost like about back in the day was like I don't know 300 bucks

I feel like you're paying for like the gross factor oh really you know what I mean like just 5,000 $10,000 just because you're

cutting a guy's skin off yeah like if it's 8 grand is that you know what I mean it's not enough when they just have Hannibal West

Jay said what 26 26,000 someone who loves it? He said 32. 32? Dude, this guy does it for free. I said 8,500.

He's just into it. All he wants is Fava beans and an ice candy. Alright. How much is it, Dan? The estimated cost. Are any of us near it? No.

Okay. The estimated cost is Townies, I bet one of you are if you said that it will cost Cheryl close to $80,000. Wow. I think it's a lot to skin a person. Jeez.

I mean, that's a lot. Hey, there's more than one way to skin a dude. What's his name? Skin a Bruce. Chris, I believe. I love my husband. Anything he wanted, he always got, no matter

what. I honor that, and I think that's fair. It is really quite beautiful. I love it. It's not that dumb. It's going to be adapted into a rom-com with Ryan Reynolds. It's called Tattoo Me. Babe, what I'm done.

Babe, what I'm done. Wait, he died, but the tattoos are talking to me. What? I don't know that it's dumb, but this is something that happens in dumb people's time. Yep, they just do it. All right, that's story number two. Dan, can you give us a little tease of what we're going to see in story number three? Somebody goes to a wedding that was not invited.

It's always fun. You've done that, Dan. You've crashed a wedding. I crashed a debutante ball. Yes, I have crashed a wedding. I was at a different wedding, but I was like, let's go into the banquet next door. All right, we're going to crash a wedding on the other side of this break

with Fahim Anwar. Stay with us. Stick around. Make a sound. There's more Dumb People Town. Hey, guys. Welcome back to the show. Fahim Anwar, a great follow on Twitter

and on Instagram. You are a great Instagram follower. I have great content, guys. You do. You always put it out. You do give good content. Thank you. Those little clips of your great follow on Twitter and on Instagram. You are a great Instagram follower. I have great content, guys. You do. You always put it out. You do give good content. Thank you. There's always little clips of your stand-up and whatnot on there.

We all do. We all have great content. At Fahim Anwar. Yes. F-A-H-I-M-A-N-W-A-R. I love it. And should we read some drip names? Yeah.

Let's read some drips. How about Shelly Miller? Shelly Miller. Crazy Shelly Miller. Crazy Shelly Miller. Man or woman? I wanted to be a man. Shelly. Shelly Cornpet. And another one. Shelly Miller. Crazy Shelly Miller. Crazy Shelly Miller. Man or woman? I wanted to be a man. Shelly.

Shelly Cornpet. I'm going to do another one. David Allen Moore. The David Allen Greer of this list right here. Oh, I was going to go David Allen Co. There you go. But I bet David Allen Moore is better. Joe O'Connor Marshall.

He's got three last, two last names. Two last names. You can go Joe. I don't care. As Meatloaf said, two out of three ain't bad. Brad. You know what I always wonder, Brad? And I know you're out there.

I wonder how many people, how, Brad, do you know were the Brad you're talking to? I hope so. Not Brad meaning Brad, but Brad meaning good. Debbie Schuster Webb. She owns her own publishing company. I thought she was a receiver for the Steelers. That was Juju Schuster Smith. Dude, I swear, this is how familiar I am with Debbie Schuster Webb.

I feel like we've said her name before, and I don't care. I think we ought to add a hey at the end of it. Debbie Schuster-Webb. Hey. Alyssa Brolsma. Brolsma. Brolsma. Oh. It's a great name. As other people in the world who have three

consonants in a row in their last name, it's very hard for people to get over. Very difficult. Brolsma. It's just your name being called when your table's ready being wrong over and over and over. Our dad literally would put our name in as Richards. His first name was Richard.

He was just like, Richard. And we, as family, who our name wasn't Richards, they'd be like, Richards, party of four. He'd be like, yep, that's us. We just knew he didn't want to deal with Skyler, Skyler.

Andre Baugh. Come on, everybody take a guess. I'm going to bow. Bow. I donler. Andre Baugh. Come on, everybody take a guess. I'm going with Baugh. I don't know. This is one of those names where I'm like, Harry Carey would love to say this name. All the way from Rio de Janeiro.

Nathan Mountain. Oh, God, dude. Born to live on Nathan Mountain with the barkers and the colored balloons. I feel bad I stepped on that. Sarah Harrison Miles. I'll walk a Sarah Harrison Miles. I can see for miles and miles.

I can see for Harrison Miles. Seth Gary. Seth Gary. Two R's. Yep, love it. Gary. Stephanie Lamparter. Lamparter. Lamparter sounds like a

diner I want to go to. Hey, you want to be on this team? You got a Lamparter. Okay. Nicole, everybody say it the way they think it's supposed to be said at the same time. Ready? One, two, three. Schieber. You say Schieber. You say Schieber. I say Schieber. For a second,

I thought it was Nicole Schrieber. I know. Schieber. Or is it not Schieber. I say Schieber. For a second, I thought it was Nicole Schreiber, who's our old friend. Schieber. Schieber. Okay. Or is it not Schieber? Ryan Callahan. Ryan Callahan. He's a cap in Chicago.

Selling brake pads. Hey, Ryan Callahan. Jennifer Reynolds. Jennifer Reynolds, man. Should have gone last so that she could wrap it up. Oh, folks. Wrap it. Well, you can't because we got Kristen next.

Thank you, Kristen. And then we'll close it out with... Mandy Pater Mosher. Mandy Pater Mosher. Mosher. I appreciate all of you guys. Mandy Pater Mosher sounds like she raises Shetland horses and shows them. Well, let's go out to Mandy Pater Rozier's house.

Mosher's house. No, leave it Rozier. Let's go to her ranch and pick up a couple of Shetland ponies. All right, guys. Thank you so much, all of you. It means so much to us that you guys support this show. You are part of this town. The ways that you do.

And we call you out. We call your names out and try and have fun with your names because we love you so much. You mean the world to us. Let's jump into this. And let's do the last story, Daniel. Here we go. Sent in by Andy Russell at The Russell 4. Two S's, two L's, the number four.

What's up, Russie? Sweet. A female wedding crasher was arrested Sunday night after barging onto the dance floor at a Florida Lions club while, quote, the bride and groom were having their last dance. Ooh! Honey, today's been perfect. This has

been perfect. It has been perfect. First of all, who thought getting a Lions club in Florida that nothing is going to go wrong? Honey, I love so much every choice that you made. And listen, we're going to walk out of this thing and say. And we were just surrounded by people we know and love. Because tonight went so smoothly, it means our lives are going to go so smoothly. 100%.

Let's take this night and make it representative of what the rest of our lives are going to be. Oh, my God! Do you think, are there wedding songs right now? Like, remember Endless Love was every wedding you went to for a while? Which one's that? Endless Love. It's Lionel Richie and Marilyn McHugh. No, Diana Ross.

It is Diana Ross. I bet it's some like early Bruno Mars, like Grenade or something. You know what I mean? I bet that's the new one. I just wondered, like, is there a... I don't know. Like, does Adele sing any songs Where people are happy

No No It's always like That's divorce music bro Adele is like I'm just at your house Trying to see Two in the morning

What's wrong I just want to see What your new wife looks like Why am I a bad person What am I doing wrong Just what I have binoculars What's wrong

I'm just trying to think If there's any I felt like the 80s and 90s Had a lot of wedding songs ballads like power ballads celebration is still a song people play at weddings

Earth, Wind & Fire, September and old time rock and roll are never going anywhere no neither is we had a band that was pretty good at my wedding

they played Guns N' Roses they played Sweet Child of Mine really? but like this is probably I don't know if the three of you can identify with this

but there's a there's a time in the 90s where every single wedding had George Straits, I cross my heart. What? It's just like, I cross my heart and promise to give all my days to you. It's like the most wedding song. I got friends in low places. If there was a smart musician, he would just try to think of the next wedding hit.

I know. If there was a smart musician He would just try to Think of the next wedding hit Yep I know Everyone is trying to Appeal to everybody For a top 40 But if you're like No I'm just gonna make A wedding banger

Let's Tonight's gonna That was a very Good night Yeah but that was a Oh how generic too I know It's got a graduation

It's gonna be a wedding Right It works for everything They even mention Mazel Tov They do Throw that in there, too. Tonight's going to be. All right.

So the bride and the groom are in their last dance. Last dance. It's last dance for love. Investigators charge that Christine Chandler slipped into the Treasure Island venue around 10 p.m. Sunday. If your last dance is at 10 p.m. Yeah, well, maybe that's all the time. That's always my number one. I understand people have budgets.

You want it to go late. When you have a venue that closes that early, like, what did you do this for? It's just 10 o'clock. Maybe they start at 5, Dan. Dan, five hours is a long time to be around. I've been waiting to start at 2, but you get that venue until 2 a.m. Come on, Dan. I'm the only one who can make it.

The uninvited Chandler, who lives across the street from the until 2 a.m. Come on, Dan. I'm the only one who can make it. The uninvited Chandler, who lives across the street from the club. Nope. Yes. Entered through a gate on the side of the building. Let me see what's going on in here. I mean, how drunk? How?

He's heard the whole... Give me that. She's definitely talking the entire time to no one. And no matter what song is playing, she hits that dance floor going, da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da One shoe. One shoe. In her hand. In her hand. One shoe in her hand. That's right. Just whipping it. The other one's giving a high five.

Oh, my God. Once inside, Chandler proceeded to enter the dance floor and began dancing while the bride and groom were having their last dance. Guests asked Chandler to leave and guided her towards the exit. Chandler departed. She started singing, like, enter Sandman, but to enter Chan-man. You don't know my nickname? Christine's gone with the wind. It's the end of the party, right?

We sing Tuesday's song. Chandler's gone. Oh, Chandler, I said hold on. I could do this all day. So. Sister Chandler, there's so much in life. Oh, Chandler. You came and you drank without thinking.

That's good, Jason. We tried to send you away, oh, Chandy. I wish I could sing Hold My Hand by Hootie and the Blowfish. Okay. Hold my hand. That's where I was going.

Chandle me with care. Like a chandel in the wind. I never know when we're to dance to. Or the venue you came in. Hey. That's good. Seems to me you lived your life like a channel in the wind.

So they, quote, guide her towards the exit. Which is every, that's how, you don't even need to say a person's drunk. You're guiding them. We're going this way. No, no, no, no. We're going this way now. No, no, no, no. Too far.

Do you know there's more of a dance floor out in the hallway? Where? There's an even bigger one out there. Right in the parking lot. Lay down right there. Lay down right there. Chandler departed the Lions Club, but subsequently, quote, returned and entered the middle of the dance floor again, which was filled with wedding guests.

Chandler was again escorted to the front exit where she was encountered by police. So they, somebody called right away. We're not letting this escalate at all. Witnesses told cops that Chandler was belligerent and caused a scene at the reception, which I bet she was like, a party. Also, a quick question, just Dan's curiosity moment here. If she came back, if it was the bride and groom's last song, and she came back and the dance floor was full

with guests, do you think they did the deal where the bride and groom don't stay for the whole party? No, I think it's... Because I love that. I love when the bride and groom leaves before the party ends. Because I've always said, if I ever got married, I want to leave before it's over. Because then in my mind, it kind of never ended. The lights

never went on. I left with everybody half drunk, having a great time. And who cares if I see them all eat pizza two hours later at the hotel? That moment and that party stayed there. Chandler was on the floor when I left. Yes. So I hope that's what that means. That was their last dance because they were leaving.

They're out of there. Maybe. Where was I? Oh, she returned and ended the dance floor. She got encountered by police. A police witness told cops that Chandler was belligerent and caused a scene at the reception. Chandler reportedly, when asked to leave the property, said, quote, I'm not fucking going anywhere. No, she isn't.

Right. Amen, brother. Which is a lie she told them and her kids, I believe. Charged with disorderly conduct, a misdemeanor, Chandler was released from jail Monday afternoon upon posting a $150 bond. That's just like a goof around bond, right? $150. That's a parking ticket. That's like Monopoly.

She would do it again. You're right. You're encouraging her to do it. That's the price of a wedding gift. Chandler's rap sheet includes numerous arrests, including collars for battery, theft, trespass, disorderly conduct, disorderly intoxication, burglary, and resisting arrest. I'm going to ask you guys as our final thing today. How old?

How old is Christine Chandler? Too much fun leaves marks in life. Living hard, you'll pay the price. Who is going to get it right? Guess the age. Guess the age. This is great. You want to go third this time?

Again, you can go first. You can do whatever you want. Bit of a sheet. So I think she's got some years on her. Yeah, bit of a sheet. I'm going to tell you, I looked at her picture, which I'll show you after you guys guess,

and I got her age within one year. So I can't show you 10 times because you're like, yeah, that girl is that years old. And let me remind people that that picture and the tattooed body picture will be on the Facebook page.

Oh, 100%. If you're listening to this podcast and you are... You should join the Facebook page. Follow it, like it. It doesn't... It's no skin off your tattooed body. It's no skin off your tattooed body.

Yes. Where did you say you want to go, brother? First, second, or third? I'll go first again. Okay. I'll do... I'll say 36. 36 years old.

Jay. Jason Sklar. She's 29. 29 years old. It takes energy to be drunk. She is 48. 48 years old from Randy Sklar. Not happening for her.

Nope. Christine Chandler, the woman who showed up for the last dance. This is the wedding she never had. Or has had a few times. Or keeps coming to. Great point, Dan. Was guided out, made her way back in, joined the entire dance floor. They still didn't want her.

And then she got to dance with the cops. Is, get your dancers in right now. Because Christine Chandler is 46 years old. Oh! Yes! This is Randy Sklar. Let me see her. Let me see her.

Let me see her. And she does. She just looks 46 and pleasant. Look at her. She doesn't look so bad. Do we look that old? I'm a year older than her. I don't know.

My guess when I looked at her was 47. That's how I gauged whether or not I could let you guys see it first. She has an expression on her face like, who me? Yeah, she's kind of proud of herself. What? She looks like Jackie Tone. You guys are mad? I love Jackie Tone.

You guys are mad at me? That's like a Jackie Tone character. That's my favorite drunk person, Jay. What? Wait, what happened? What did I do? You guys are seriously mad at me? You guys?

And then when they find out they're on your side, that is horrible. Oh, my God. I'm appalled. That is horrible. I would be mad at me, but you guys are mad at me. What? Why? There you go.

That is the show. Oh, shit. I'm so happy that Fahima and War got to join us. Again, go on ComedyCentral.com. Check out Goat Face. Do it, people. Fantastic sketch comedy. Goat Face, kill her.

Yeah, Goat Face out Goat Face. Do it, people. Fantastic sketch comedy. Goat Face, killer. Yeah, Goat Face. Goat Face. Just watch all the sketches, enjoy them, and then really get into the stand-up and whatnot. Yeah, my special, it's called There's No Business Like Show Business. So I think Comedy Central licensed it. You can watch it for free on there. Or it's on Prime as well with no commercials. So if you have apps on Prime, you can watch it there.

Check out his stand-up and follow him and check him out. And oh, shit, we've got to get back to work. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

Stick around. Make a sound. Calm your down. It's Dumb People Town. It's a good show.