Dumb People Town - Janet Varney and Cole Stratton - Big Bertha Test Drive

Episode Date: July 9, 2019

This week Janet Varney and Cole Stratton stop by to hear about a confusing  squeege attack. In the second story a woman steals her car back after taking it to the dealership for repair. In the third story, a couple get arrested for adult fun in a kiddie pool. 

Star Pains, I know. Hey townies, welcome to another episode of Dumb People Town. Population you. Population Barney and Stratton. That. Population Varney and Stratton. That is a population Varney and Stratton. We got two people. Janet Varney and Cole Stratton, two of our favorite and longtime friends. We were just up in the San Francisco area,

and I remember the very first Sketch Fest that we did with you guys. Which was the very second Sketch Fest ever. We walked by the old Eureka Theater, which is now called... It's a gateway. The gateway theater brought to you by Tostitos,

I think. Everything's blown up in San Francisco. But beautiful memories of wonderful times and the length of our friendship, which goes back so, so far.

Janet, of course, you were fantastic in Back on Tops, which we're putting clips of that in our Instagram feed. Follow us. And you have great stuff going on, which we'll get to later. But the world is getting dumber, and we can't.

We got to stop it, dudes. I don't know if we can, but we can try. Does it feel like, are we wrong to say that, Janet? Yeah, you paused, and I don't know if. Oh, did I pause? Yeah. Did I pause in not responding at all? I think that's what happened. It was such a long pause. that janet yeah you paused and i don't know if oh did i pause yeah do you believe did i pause in not responding at all i think that's what happened it was such a long pause i it was i

didn't make a sound or say anything yeah uh oh i yeah yeah it is i'm afraid i'm for real feeling like it's yeah we see it so much do you remember when the big deal was like we're gonna run out of shrimp and then they started farming them and it was fine? Yeah. I wish that running low on shrimp was the big issue right now. The shrimp crisis. Remember that? Listen, we're going to get rid of smart people.

Let's start farming them. Great, great, great, great. There was a time when, Randy and I say this all the time, when we're out, because we don't go out except for when we're going and doing stand-up and then we're out in the world. There was a time when there was a town drunk. And everyone's like, just watch out for Gabby. He's going to be embarrassing.

Just watch out for Gabby. Now everyone is a town drunk, and there's one guy who's sober who's like, I can't handle this. I can't. Yeah, and they're like, watch out for that downer. Watch out for that downer. He's a real bummer. It's my birthday.

Boo. Boo. Take our picture Dan do we have Hi Dan Hey how are you my friend We're good Should we jump into a story

We've got Cole and Janet here Yeah for sure For sure Alright this was Sent in I just lost my tab But I'm back Get in that tab

I'm going to This was sent in to us By Andy Greenberg At Andy the G Little Andy Greenberg at Andy the G. Little Andy Greenberg. Doing it again. He's all grown up. He's all grown up.

He's all grown up. Little Andy Greenberg. He did what everybody should do, and that is just at Daniel Van Kirk, hashtag dumb people town. There you go. So easy. So I can get these stories in the order in which they're sent in. Andy Greenberg knows how to do it. Well, Greenberg knows what he's

doing, especially because today we've got a Greenlee. Oh! You guys are here on a fantastic day. Let us explain what a Greenlee is. Will Greenlee, who is a journalist, quote-unquote, all-cast journalist, who writes for the

TC Palm, among other publications in Southern Florida. Tiny frustration palm. He actually- Tiny frustration palm. He actually was a stringer and kind of helped break the whole story about Robert Kraft, the owner of the Patriots, going to that day spa that had basically indentured servants and happy endings, but not so happy for the people who were basically being trafficked in the back of that thing. It's a terrible thing, but he was one of the guys who reported on that.

He also writes about true crime stuff and dumb crime stuff in that area. We feel, and I'm not sure about this, that he is told that he has a thousand words to fill. And every story is about 500. So what Will Greenlee

will do is he will explain in great detail things that don't need explaining at all. Other than it was very, very, very, very, very, very, very sad. It would almost be better if he did that. Instead, he will tell you what an anchor is. Yeah. And in full detail, things that we all know exist. Now, the other explanation is that he thinks he's writing for a dumb population that maybe don't know

what Ann Anchor does. That's the mystery. That's how dumb this world is. Is it irony? So we may actually be on his, I may be on his side on this, but the game we like to play and that Dan is so good at playing at is, Dan will read the story. And is what Dan is reading, is it

something that Greenlee came up with or Dan? It's so nice. Who over explained this? Okay, great. Let's get into it. Are you ready? Port St. Lucie. A flap over a squeegee turned into a machete and razor blade attack that landed one man

behind bars. The other behind a windshield. Ferdinand Velez Latour. That is a Latour. This is my kid's favorite new animated movie. Ferdinand Velez Latour was arrested March 20th after an investigation by

Port St. Lucie Police. I don't... I'm sure that they don't have the most dangerous cop job in the country. I'm sure there are other parts, but they't have the most dangerous cop job in the country. I'm sure there are other parts, but they must have the most interesting. Every day, if you're down in Port St. Lucie, Florida, I'm going to see some machete.

Fire started a fire. Baths. That's a mouthful, though. Port St. Lucie police freeze. It's too much. Oh, yeah. You got to go PSL. One man identified as a victim on march 11th told police that latore was drunk and began arguing with a second male victim

about a squeegee he said latore cut the second victim's arm with a razor blade so if i'm following i'm tracking right there's a victim who's telling us about a second victim but but we have yet to hear how this first person is a victim other than just a witness. If you have razor blades on you at the time that you can then produce in a moment, you are looking for a fight. I'm already so confused because I, in my mind, thought that he was saying that he had converted the edge of a squeegee into a razor blade type thing. That would be amazing. Like a quick shiv. Yeah. Just a quick.

Quick shiv. So I thought that it was a flap over a squeegee so that a squeegee had like a flap over it. That's what I thought turned into the razor blade. The flap that went over the squeegee. Oh, because I'll reread it. A flap over a squeegee turned into a machete and razor blade attack.

You can't use the word flap as a thing that happens between people. A brouhaha. A Johnny Brooke, a brouhaha. A row. I'm fine with any of those. A row over a squeegee turned into a machete and razor blade attack. There should be commas.

This would be the way to do it. With the word fight it makes so much more sense. A fight over a squeegee turned into a machete and razor blade attack that landed one man behind bars. I'm more comfortable. Turned into is where I get transformery here. Escalated. Okay.

A fight over a squeegee escalated into a machete and razor blade attack that landed one man behind bars. I no longer think a squeegee turned into a machete. Can we call ourselves editors for the TC bomb? Editors at large? Yes, for sure. But here's the deal.

Again, I'm going to go back to the thing of like, have you ever just carried razor blades just in case? I know, this is a big point. Just in case! Anyone who has a razor blade on them is always ready to cut you. What if it's somebody who was an extra in Michael Jackson's bad video?

Stay with me. And he never changed out of that outfit. And there just happened to be a razor blade that he whipped out in that. That was the beat of the video. You mean the beat of the video. I was with you on that. And it's a switch blade not a razor blade. Razor blade is just like something that should fit

into something else. Like it should be sitting into like a little brown envelope. Isn't there like a razor blade. Razor blade is just like something that should fit into something else. Like it should be sitting into like a little brown envelope. But isn't there like a razor? That's a switch blade. That's a flip blade. That's a switch blade or a flat razor like Barber. But isn't Eastern Promises that has the fight scene with the razor blade? Thank you. I know that this has been a thing where it has a handle.

It definitely is. And I don't just mean it has a nickname. Sweeney Todd. That's a straight razor. A lot of razor action. That's a straight razor. A razor blade. I don't know.

I like that you went to an extra from a bad video that 20 plus years later is still in character. That's what I'm saying. You can't let it go. I'm ready to believe that if you're in Florida, that may be the best store you have. Like, oh, I just got back 20 years ago from. Or you might be the most normal person in Port St. Lucie. Or you're Tupac in Above the Rim, constantly with the razor blade in his mouth.

It scared me when I was a kid. I didn't understand it. I didn't know if it was like a fashion trend. Yeah. If you're Criss Angel, you're chewing that thing up and squabbling. For sure. Okay.

Criss Angel to us, and we've always said this, he's like in too good a shape to be a good magician. Like you ask yourself, how much work are you putting in on your abs and could that work have been put into the magic? Because we say you only need one ab for magic and it's abracadabra. That is a big ass.

All right. So one man identified as a victim who I feel is self-identified. Sure. Totally. A hundred percent. He's like, I was a victim too. victim who I feel is self-identified. Sure. Totally, 100%. He's like, I was a victim too. Sir, it sounds like you just witnessed it. No, no, no, no, no. I identify as.

He keeps coming over. We're all victims. He keeps coming over and he's like, what are you guys talking about? You know, I was a victim too. Sir, we have. Sir, we got your statement. We will get it in due time.

Are we doing a class action or anything on this? Sir, we will get to you in a moment. Take a giant step back. We can't write everybody's name. You can't sit on my desk, sir. I guess I'm under arrest. No, you're not under arrest, sir. I'm a perpetrator now.

No, you're not. We're going to take everyone's name. Nancy, take him down to the snack bar. Oh, okay. I'll just go join the other cops. No, you're not a cop. Guys, come along here. You are not a cop. I was attacked. I got a snack attack, guys. That counts too, right. No, you're not a cop. You are not a cop.

I got a snack attack, guys. That counts too, right? No, sir. Put that trash can down. You're not cleaning up anything. You don't work here now. I just work for the city. Sir, why are you clocking in? There is a serpent. One man identified as a victim on March 11th told police that LaTorre was drunk

and began arguing with a second male victim about a squeegee. He said Latore cut the second victim's arm with a razor blade. Next, he said Latore got a machete and chased the second victim. So far, this first victim has had

no role in this story. Did he pick one up off the side of the road? That's a good point. I'm going to reach into the machete tree. Like it's a Mortal Kombat. There's just weapons around. Someone assigned him the machete. In case of emergency, break glass and there's a machete behind it. I'm going to

blindly reach back here. I'm sure I'll pick something up and then what? Or was it the bottom of like a Cracker Jack box? Like, I got a machete. What'd you get? I got a word finder. Next, he said LaTorre got a machete and chased the second victim. He said the second victim jumped on a pickup truck and LaTorre followed. Unlike a car, a truck has an enclosed cab and open back.

No. Is that Greenlee or is that Dan? That's Dan. Okay. I'm going to go Greenlee. Okay. Okay. Dan's so good at this.

You guys don't understand how good Dan is. You don't understand. Okay. Dan's so good at this. You guys don't understand how good Dan is. You don't understand how much he's... Dan is so good. Dan is fucked with us so hard on this. He is so up in our heads on this. We've done ones where Greenlee didn't write any of them. Dan wrote all of them. We've done ones where Greenlee wrote all of them.

When Dan does that to you, then there's... This is so good. I think it's Greenlee. I think it's Greenlee. It's been all business up to this point. I think it needs to be a Greenlee. He said the second victim jumped onto a pickup truck and Latore followed. The person who wrote this sentence, unlike a car, a truck has an enclosed cab and open

back. That was written by Daniel VanCurk. Damn you. Barney. You got to go with the gut. Don't let him get in your head. Go with your first instinct. I'll kill you.

I'll kill everybody. Wait, Dan, are you saying that to us now? I'm sorry I chose greenly. I'm sorry. I'll kill you. I'll kill everybody, Latoria is quoted as saying. Remember, this is over a squeegee. Okay. I'll kill you. I'll kill everybody, Latoria

is quoted as saying. A squeegee is a T-shaped tool with a cross-piece edge with leather or rubber. Squeegees are designed to facilitate the removal of water from a surface, such as a window, by dragging it across the surface.

I'm going Greenlee, 100%. Okay. He's got to explain what that squeegee is. He has not done it yet. Yeah, I think people don't know in Florida. They might have a handle

on trucks, but I don't think they have a handle on squeegees, so I'll go Greenlee. And a handle is something you hold on to. I think it's Greenlee. Okay. I think it's Dan. on squeegees, so I'll go greenly. And a handle is something you hold on to. I think it's greenly.

Okay. I think it's Dan. Okay. The person who wrote a squeegee is a T-shaped tool with a cross-piece edge with leather rubber. Squeegees are designed to facilitate the removal of water from a surface such as a window by dragging it across the surface. Hold on.

Before you reveal it, if it is Dan, I am now in so much trouble. Oh, yeah. Because if he... Okay, go ahead. The person who wrote that is Will Greenlee. Yeah! There it is. Meanwhile, the second victim said...

I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. Meanwhile, the second victim said LaTorre was upset with him over a squeegee records show. Parenthetically, the world's fastest window cleaner is terry turbo burrows who set a record in october 2009 in the united kingdom by using an 11.75 inch squeegee to clean three 45 inch and by 45 inch windows in 9.14 seconds according to the guinness book of world records formerly formerly the guinness book of records who wrote that he explained what the guinness book of records. Who wrote that? He explained what the Guinness Book of Records evolved to.

Oh, no. The parenthetically is really throwing me. Cole, you can go first. I'll go Dan Van Kirk. I agree. Okay. I think that's Will Greenlee. I'm 0 for 2.

I think that's Greenlee. Okay. The person who wants you to know that Terry Turbo Burroughs set a record in October 29. This is the most fun. And this is according to the Guinness Book of World Records, formerly the Guinness Book of Records. The person who wrote that is Will Greenlee. That's crazy!

That's a journalist. So many raffles. I should have followed the parenthetically gut instinct again. That's the one that told me it was him. But I was like, there's no way. Can you believe that exists in an article? That's in a paper. So now do you think, let me stop right here and ask you guys.

Do you think he has a certain amount of words to fill and just all the stories stop short? Or do you think he's trying to explain to dumb people? I think he fell short. that case fell short i think squeegee legitimately is like some people might not know yeah but for that that's ridiculous he told us how an anchor works and that's definitely like i've written what i plan to write and now i looked at my word count story he wrote lyrics from the thong song yeah to let people okay people. Okay. So he is. We got ourselves a Greenlee. By the way, he is.

And by the way, I want to make a shirt with Will Greenlee's face on it. And it says, we got ourselves a Greenlee. Got me. And it's a picture of Will Greenlee. We got ourselves me. We got ourselves a Greenlee. And I want that shirt only to be available to people who subscribe to the Patreon. We could do that. Let's do that.

We're going to do it. We're going to make that a possibility. Are you sure that Greenlee isn't Sisko? I don't know. We're not unsure. We've never seen the two of them in the same room, even though they are of different races. Have you ever seen either of them in a room? No. That is actually a great point.

A room is a dwelling. Is that Greenlee? The second victim said Latore cut his arm with a razor blade after the second victim declined to give LaTorre the squeegee. The second victim also said that LaTorre chased him with a machete. Also, keep your game track. First victim has yet to answer this story in any way. Zero.

Police initially couldn't find LaTorre. One of the victims said he lived in his car and was staying in his driveway, which is an uncommon choice for vehicle living. More common options for automobile living are RVs or vans. Who wrote that? Greenlee or me? I feel Greenlee on that one. I'll go Dan Vankirk. Okay.

I think that's Dan Vankirk. Okay. That's Dan. The person who wants you to know what is a more common choice for vehicle living is Daniel Vankirk. Yes! I came out so strong. I'm like believing in myself again.

Thank you. Latoria of Port St. Lucy surrendered to authorities on March 20th at the St. Lucy County Jail or SLCJ on three felony warrants in connection with the incident. That's our Greenleaf for today. Wow. I know. You know,

what I also am taken by is. What was the fight about for today. Wow! I know. You know, what I also am taken by is that... What was the fight about? Who knows? What did the first victim have to do with anything? So here's my thing. So Greenlee spends all this time explaining like window washing champions. That's what I was about to get to, man. That's crazy you were gonna say that.

He spends so much time explaining what little things are, but the story itself, I don't know what happened. I don't know why it happened. I don't know who was involved. What did the first victim have to do with any of it? What was that person a victim of? And always one fun thing in these, they always have links to other stories that just say more.

So I'll run down what our more headlines are inside this story. If you made it to the bottom of this, you're going to love this. More. Pile of burning pot plants attracts attention. Okay. Is that a Eugene Levy movie? I don't know. More. Naked and belligerent woman jailed after sex caper.

Caper? Right, which I think I hope she means what comes with your noodles. The great Muppet sex caper. And then here's the last one. No, that was actually the Muppets take Manhattan. There was a hand up somewhere. I don't know. Here's the last one.

More. Why are sweatpants strings flying in the air? No idea. I would click on all of those. I would click on all those. If they're all written by Greenlee. Why are they flying in the air? Why are sweatpants strings flying in the they flying why are sweatpants flying in the air

what are sweatpants given i want you dan to give at least your best i don't know i haven't read this but my best i haven't read it either but what is your interpretation give your best guess for why sweat strings are flying in the air i would guess two people got in a fight and someone threw their sweat pants string at someone else and that was a quote from someone. And I said, why are sweat pants strings flying in the air? That's my best guess. Janet, what do you think?

I agree that they could have been thrown. I feel they were intentionally hurled as like a bola so that you would like swing around someone. There's a little extra weight on the little plastic things. Those have a name. hurled as like a bola so that you would like it was like swinging around someone. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The weight on the there's a little extra weight on the little plastic things

that Those have a name. They do have a name and I don't know what they are. I think an astronaut just found out he's getting divorced

and he doesn't care. He's just putting on his space sweatpants and they're floating around to your gravity. Space sweats. And somehow the string escaped gravity,

escaped his fully closed hatch. I think there is a sweatpants company in the TC Palm area that is making, they're making sweatpants, defective sweatpants. And people are trying to take the strings out. And they're whipping them out at rates that are just, they're flying through the air. And it's upsetting people and it's causing fights.

And so it's a defect in the company that is popularly making sweatpants. I'd like to change my answer. I feel that this has to do with a silly string shortage. And the cans have been loaded with sweatpants strings, which for some reason there's more of than the pants themselves. So mine is that I think the Dave Matthews band is playing in Port St. Lucie. They were driving over a bridge.

Someone took a dump on the tour bus and it was a mess. And so they had to take the string out of their sweatpants and threw it out the window and all of it landed on a boat underneath the bridge. I think the sweat, I'm going to now change. I think the Dave Matthews band made me. So there is a Dave Matthews band cover band or inspired band that is a jam band.

Also inspired by the string cheese incident. There are the sweatpants string incidents. And that's just there. It's basically a promotional article about their music. I think somebody reached for machetes and didn't find any. And that's what they just had to huck at somebody else. Sweatpants strings. Hey, you grab what you can.

Maybe they'll get sent in and we'll find out. That's story number one. Story number one down in the books. Janet Barney, Cole Stratton in the house. Let's take a break. When we come back, we'll find out. That's story number one. Story number one down in the books. Janet Barney, Cole Stratton in the house. Let's take a break. When we come back, we'll find out what they have cooking. This is Dump People Town. Stay with us.

Stick around. Make it sound. For more Dump People Town. Hey, guys. Welcome back to the show. Randy mentioned briefly before our Patreon. We just were up in San Francisco and we talked to those wonderful ladies who are helping us at Patreon. These women are awesome, and they're really trying to connect with us to find the best ways to give you guys more stuff, more content, more merch, ideas, and things like that, which we are jamming on.

The best way to get involved is just simply to go to patreon.com slash dumbpeopletown and join. Sign up and you will get great, great things at every level.

And people who come by and go to the, who are at the level where they can come to the meet and greets pre-show before we do live shows which we're doing.

Sometimes they end up after show too. Like when we did Sketch Fest, we hung out with our fans pre-show and post-show. At the bar around the corner from Cobb's. Yeah, it was great. It's a little like corner bar.

I love that place. Yeah. So we closed it down. But anyway, it's just good stuff. So we have to remember to remind you guys to join. We've moved over from Drip. And look, you guys have built a beautiful community on the Facebook page. Let's convert that over.

Let's keep doing that. Guys, what do we have cooking? What's shaking? Where can people see you and catch the stuff that you, all the great stuff that you guys do? Well, let's see. Cole is in a thing I did for IFC called Fortune Rookie, which is available online, YouTube, IFC.

Love it. At fortunerookie.net, where he plays a member of an aging boy band. Love it. Also in the boy band the hot basics are all you want to give a little detail yeah it's Oscar Nunez Ian Brennan John

Michael Higgins Michael Hitchcock and myself oh my god that is unbelievable improvisers yeah and and Hitchcock it was the most fun to film Because we had no idea How anybody was going to

Portray their characters And like I ended up sort of being The straight man And I'm ridiculous in it Correct Oh wow So and Higgins just chose

To do this voice That was perplexing He just did this Very soft voice I've never heard him Do that voice in my life Was it improvised Or did you write it out

It was written Nice But then we played a it improvised or did you write it out? It was written Nice, but you could allow But then we played a little bit So did you create it? I did Nice, and you wrote it Yeah, I play a version of myself Who's a little bit of a jerk

But who is told by a fortune Is told by a psychic A self-proclaimed psychic A self-identifying psychic In a bathroom That she feels I also am psychic. And so I immediately quit show business to become a fortune teller

with zero experience. To hilarious results. I love that idea. So people can see that on IFC. They can. On IFC.com and YouTube and all that. Great. Watch it! Their fortune rookie. I love it. I mean, it's a YouTube and all that. And it's on YouTube and yeah. Great. Watch it. Watch it. Their Fortune Rookie.

I love it. Yeah. You guys are so great. I mean, it's a punny title, so. No. I felt like, if anything, that's right. I just got it. The Sklars would enjoy.

On it. We love that. We love it. And of course, if you're in San Francisco, Sketch Fest every year is. And throughout the year. Yeah, we're almost. Right, guys? I feel like you're always doing super cool events,

even in the summer. Yeah, we do a little bit here and there. We work on outside lands and Clusterfest doing some programming there with them, which is cool. And we are kind of shocked because this January, I think it's the 9th through 26th, it's our 19th year, which is crazy to think about. We're already thinking about 20, which is crazy.

That's going to be incredible. One of the best festivals in the world. Oh, yeah. I love it. In terms of fan participation. Oh, venues. Comedians, venues. You know what else, too?

The support staff. Oh, thank you. From top to bottom. It's just like cool, great people. That's great to hear. We love it, love it, love it. Well, put that on your calendar, everybody. I know everyone likes to plan that far in advance.

So, please, six months from now. It's just nice to know. Think love it, love it, love it. Well, put that on your calendar, everybody. I know everyone likes to plan that far in advance. So please, six months from now. It's just nice to know. But think about it. Think about it. Yeah. Think about it. Think about it. Think about it.

It's about. Hey. It's about. I know. All right, should we jump into another story? Let's do it. Let's do it. This was sent in by Joe Luttrell, at the gentleman Joe.

I think this guy sends in a lot of great stories. Always. He's very much on it. Okay. He's about to introduce us to a new character. Mm. She, I'll just read you a headline she if someone gave this to you it's like here's your hey you're gonna go on stage don't worry it's just all improv here's who you are this is everything you would need she took her truck to be serviced then she saw it on the highway so she saw it on the highway, so she stole it back. Yeah! Yes. Nice.

This is a woman who drives a truck, number one, which I love. She don't take no guff. What is it? What kind of a truck? A truck is a four-wheeled vehicle. Do it greenly. This is a woman who she's like,

if Liam, if Liam, Liam, if Liam Neeson was a redneck, that's this lady and a woman. I actually think this is a woman who drops her truck off and says, now don't give me the runaround. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. She has a certain set of skills is what I was trying to get at. Don't give me the runaround. A Flowood woman.

Flow. Flowood. A Flowood woman who took her car. They should have written truck. Dan, is it Floorwood, and you're just trying to put some English on the pronunciation? Oh, yeah, F-L-O-W-O-O-D. When it is a woman's time of the month, can you say, I'm taking it down to Flowood? I'm going to Flowood.

You can now. I'm taking it down to Flowood. Yeah. I got to take my truck into Flowood, can't I? Oh. I got to take my truck down into Flowood to get service means this is not the time for us to be having sex sure a Flowood woman who took her car

to a dealership for repairs was alarmed to discover the vehicle being driven around by one of its employees if you did see this how I would go apeshit there is so much wrong with the possessives and all of that I'm sorry my dad is an English

teacher was an English teacher retired and that immediately I'm sorry. My dad is an English teacher, was an English teacher, retired. And that immediately I just felt like I got my, what do you say, your hackles out? Your dander. Your dander. Because so far what I've understood is that her car employs someone. That's like what I heard at the end.

A woman who took her car to a dealership for repairs was alarmed to discover the vehicle being driven around town by one of the employees of the car of the car correct that car was busy

hiring and firing while he was getting serviced yeah she followed it then she took it back followed it how on foot

staked it out Penny Ivy Thompson I love her P-I-T P-I-T hit the pit I want to love you P-I-T Penny Ivy Thompson. I love her. P-I-T. P-I-T. Hit the pit. I want to love you, P-I-T. Penny Ivy Thompson.

Penny Ivy Thompson posted to Facebook her unusual experience with the Mac Hake dealership in Flowood. By Thursday afternoon, her post had gone viral, being shared more than 4,400 times. Is that viral? By Thursday afternoon, her post had gone viral, being shared more than 4,400 times. Is that viral? It's all about your ratio. If you have 19 friends and something gets shared 4,400 times. That's pretty good. I'm getting suspicious.

Is it possible, and listen, I don't know how anagrams work, but is her name an anagram for Sarah Connors? This could be like a viral marketing ploy for the next Terminator. The woman who takes her car to be serviced and then chases it down when she sees it on the highway could be Sarah Connors. All I keep thinking is, with the first pick of the NBA draft, the Orlando Magic take Penny Ivy Thompson. She just walks up. Small forward. Remember when Ivy just cost a penny?

Yeah. Those are the Thompson days. Thompson said she originally brought her Dodge truck, also known as Big Bertha, to the dealership to be serviced. Is it known as that or is that what you call it? Known as is like saying that 44 shares is viral when you just call it that right if you tell your kids what your card's name is that's not what it's known it's not known as yeah known as doesn't really work like it's a new dodge durango you mean the dodge big bertha yeah exactly that's what that's what's known as here's the test if you walk into a room and there's some people who know you

and say i'm gonna go take Big Berth out for a spin, and people don't think that you're having a relationship with another woman, then it's known as Big Berth? According to her Facebook post, Thompson was later driving down Lakeland Drive when she saw her truck being driven by someone from the dealership. She initially thought it was a test drive, but she said she was concerned. Hang on. Who would be test driving her truck?

Well, maybe they make some noise and they fix it. Oh, they're driving around. Let me make sure. Let me see if I can get you into this car. It's her truck with the mileage and sticker price on the passenger back window. What's the MSRP on Big Bertha?

Hey, I just want to make sure that that knocking noise is done, so I drove to this guy's house to buy cocaine. I just want to take it out, see if I want to service it. I'm testing out. We'll see if we get along. I don't know Big Bertha. She thought it was a test drive, but she said she was concerned because the driver was tailgating another vehicle.

So not only would you be pissed that someone's driving around, you're watching them ride it hard and piss other people off. Just be an aggressive driver. She did what anyone... If it would have driven normally, she would have been cool. Right. But this is the straw that broke Bertha's back. Maybe the car in front of it had the part it needed to fix it. So he's trying to get it back.

It's called the judicial system, guys. Benefit of the doubt. You're going to make a great lawyer in the whole town. When you go to law school. Right. We did a story once about a guy who broke into people's house and fought them and ransacked their place and their defense was that they were trying to get to the roof where the spaceship was coming to pick them up.

That was the defense of the defense. And we imagine that lawyer was a southern guy constantly sweating, wearing a bolo top, named Ronald T. Justice. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my name is Ronald T. Justice and you will address me as such. Day three of the trial. We all continue to address you as that. Your Honor, may I make, may I approach the bench? Nope. There's no need.

I don't think you know who this is. We're still at recess right now. My name. We know. Is Ronald E. Duff. So she did what anyone would do in today's universe of smartphones and social media. She captured the moment and shared it on Facebook. Not what I would do.

The moment. This is what she wrote. Maybe something that people would have done seven years ago. Sure. That moment you see a Mack Hake employee test driving your Dodge down Lakeland Drive tailgating, all caps,

another vehicle. I followed him to see if my truck would make it back in one piece because I know it doesn't stop on a dime. And this point just wanted him out of it. At least she didn't say heading into the weekend like. Hashtag Big Bertha. Yes.

Hashtag tailgating. I also love that she's like. Hashtag summer blues. Hashtag pump the brakes. Yeah, she's trying to get out in front of her car's problems. That car does not stop on a dime. And I already know that. So if it hits somebody, that's

not her fault. Yeah, you gotta protect yourself within that post. For sure. Thompson said the technician drove to a Lowe's about two miles down the road from the dealership. She said she waited while the man was inside when she called the dealership to ask them if they knew where her truck

was. Then she made her boldest move yet. Couldn't get bolder. No. You're kidding me. What is she riding in? Knight to E5. Knight to Bertha 6.

Well played, old friend. Right, right. She said she found a spare key in her purse and took her truck back, leaving the technician stranded in the parking lot. So the technician didn't see it happening? No, he went into Lowe's. Here's my first question for you guys.

How long do you think she waited while the man was inside before she stole her own truck back? Also, side note, doesn't that mean she left whatever car she was driving? Yes, we don't know anything about how she got there. But maybe that's from the dealership. I hope she was walking.

Was like, ah. Yeah. What the? Oh, yeah. How long? You are our guests, guys. So you can go first or second or third or fourth, whatever you want to do. I mean, it has to be now a significant amount of time for you to ask a question.

Or it's just like two minutes. And you're just you. He's in Lowe's. Like literally the door's closed. How long would she wait for him to be in Lowe's before she steals that truck back? 25 minutes. 25 minutes from Janet. Seven minutes.

Seven from Cole. Jay? Two minutes. Two minutes? Two minutes. Yeah. I think it was 10 minutes because you want to make sure that they're not coming right back out.

Right. You got to kind of wait. Okay. Also, she probably wanted to get the story from Big Bertha herself. Like she needed to just talk to the car for a while. You mean some download time? Downloading? Before she was going to. Whoa. Yeah. Easy girl. Whisper it. to get the story from Big Bertha herself. She needed to just talk to the car for a while. You need some download time? Easy girl.

Whisper it. You gotta whisper it back before you can just drive her. If she comes up from the tailgate, you know she's like, I'm right here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Gotta give her a heads up. I want you to see me in your rear view. I'm coming up on your side. It's a process. Girl. Girl.

Easy, baby. One of Girl, baby. Okay. Easy, baby. One of you got within five minutes. Okay. She said she waited 20 minutes. Way to go, Janet. Janet. I was going to say, if it was two, the only reason we would know it's two is if she kept

telling him. You know how long I waited? Two minutes. Two minutes. Son of a bitch. Two minutes. She waited 20 minutes. And then I also like that she says she had a spare key

leaving the technician's train in the parking lot. Did she wait until he came walking back out and then drove off? Oh, yeah. That would be exciting. Did she make eye contact? That is bold. But if he was not out yet, that doesn't seem old to me.

But the moment of if she stole it, I would steal it and then drive far enough to where I could see him walk out and freak out. You need to see the freak out. Because you don't want him to see it's you either. You want him to be like, holy shit. Someone else stole it and I made an even bigger mess. Oh, that's great. Yeah, if she wanted to be bold, she should have hot-wired her

own car, even though she had the spare key. Yeah, for sure. Well, that's bold. Or drive it and park it at a friend's house that's out of view and then go back to the dealership and be like, okay, when's it going to be ready? Or go up and damage the hell out of your car. Yeah, just smash it.

Break all the windows. All these things are more bold. And then be like, everything good with my car? Yeah. Everything good with it? She wanted him to see it like some sort of car cuckolding thing. Yeah. Watch.

I caught you. I caught you. I caught you. Quote, you know. Hashtag you know. When ellipses is three, can you get your dad on the horn? What's four? Four means that's the end of the sentence.

So ellipses and a period. It means a trail off. It's a trail off. You know, ellipses period. Every now and then I get crazy. I will own that. She has three other fights currently going on. She doesn't want those people chiming in on this post. She's like, all right, I know I get crazy.

I'll own it and I'll deal with Colleen. We'll talk about it on a different post. I thought she was referring to that Every time I get a little crazy I look at something and I'm like I will own that I own you bitch I will own that

She's trying to hedge off other arguments You know I get crazy I will own that She's not speaking to all of her kids I can't always be trusted. I know that about me. I remember what I did at your birthday party. I own it.

I like to sniff rubber cement every five minutes. If you wanted all the chips, you shouldn't have left them out. Why can't I take them home with me? I've shit in a few backpacks. I will own that. We aren't talking about that today. I strangled a monkeyacks. I will own that. We aren't talking about that today. I strangled a monkey once. I will own that.

You don't know what the monkey said to me, to be fair. He looked at me funny. I was wasted. I am not the person to say that I haven't done those things. I will own that. She said, you know, every now and then I get crazy. I will own that. I found my spare key out of my purse, and I steal my own Dodge from Lowe's parking lot.

You mean stole it? Nope. And I steal my own. I steal my Dodge. She's the kind of person. She's keeping it in the present because that makes the story more exciting. She's the kind of person who says, so I says. So I says.

She's Daniel Plainview. I steal my Dodge. I steal my Dodge. Back up a second she keeps her spare key In her purse which is where she probably Keeps her normal key Which means if her purse is stolen She loses both keys at once She can't own that

But she probably also never locks her doors So she can get it in a bin Or I bet she locks the doors but leaves the windows open That's who she is yeah uh i found my spare key out out of my purse and i steal my own dodge from lowe's parking lot because you see i'm a home depot kind of girl anyway what she said i don't know we're at lowe's meanwhile are they reading her post are they just reading off of her facebook post that's what i was gonna say there's no interview that occurred here.

It's all just rehashing what they read. This is my favorite part. Highly viral post. And Home Depot's like, don't drop us. Don't drop our name. You own your crazy. You might be us, but we're not a you. This is the most viral post. I mean, this is the chocolate rain of our generation.

100%. This is the conversation I wish we all could witness. Thompson said she returned to the dealership and confronted someone there, which might have been a customer. A 10-year-old girl. Where's your daddy? I have to talk to you about something. He's looking at a car.

She claims someone at the dealership offered to service her vehicle for free with one condition. Oh my god! Give it conditions! She was asked not to post her story to social media. Thank god she didn't, her! She was like, that's exactly what I'm doing. She's like, and send. Yeah.

The next three words, which are... Well, no, you know she was like, okay, I'm not gonna do it. They serviced the car, she got it back, she didn't pay for it, and then she clicked send. it. They serviced the car. She got it back. She didn't pay for it. And then she clicked send. Oh, 100%. Clicked post.

The next sentence is literally, Thompson didn't listen. And it's its own paragraph. Do not mess. This is a quote. Do not mess with my family, my animals, my money, or my truck. Nobody drives Big Bertha like that. New sentence, nobody. Nobody drives Big Bertha like that. New sentence, nobody.

Do not mess with my family, my animals, money, or truck, which I think she listed in ascending order. Family, then animals, truck. No, you're going the other way. It goes truck, money, animals, family, that God, this story was immediately optioned by William Morrison.

This is the plot of Deadwood. The new Deadwood movie. We'll get out of here on this. William LaGrange, the dealership's general manager. Now he's pulled into this, commented on a followup post from her. Still did not talk to him.

No. For one second. I thought he made one phone call. Right. No, this reporter is... I'm fully aware of the situation that has occurred, and I'm disgusted that an employee of mine would take a customer's vehicle for anything other than official use.

I take full responsibility for what has occurred. Swift action has taken place and will continue to take place. You know when they say swift action has taken place? Nothing. Nothing. Especially if you have to say will continue to take place. If you fire someone, you're done.

Right. Every day we shame him a little bit. And we will continue to do so. If it's swift action, once the action is taken, it should be over. Unless you're not taking big enough action. Swift, it should be over. That's right. Unless you're not taking big enough action. Swift and ongoing are two things that are never happening. Swift long-term action is happening. Swift and immediate extensive long-term action.

You have no idea. I bailed on it there. There are six more paragraphs of him talking about what's going to be done at this dealership. I'm not lying to you. Can you give some bullet points? LaGrange said the employee took the truck was fired. LaGrange also invited Thompson and her husband to meet with him so he could formally apologize in person. They have every right to be mad. That's a quote he went on to say. You are cordially invited. This will never happen again. Then we enter Robert Watson, owner and operator of the dealership.

He told the Clarion Ledger that this is not how they handle customer vehicles. We love our customers. We should treat our people better. By the way, look at how much dancing he's been able to do because one guy's an asshole. It goes viral. What was that guy doing? He just needed to pick up something at Lowe's and he thought it would be easy to take that car. Is it theoretical that they said, hey, I need to go make sure that nose isn't happening anymore and I'm going to run to Lowe's.

It's about two miles down, two miles back. By the way, he was not trafficking children in the trunk of Big Bertha. As far as we know. But would the trunk fit? And I'm asking because I need to know if a cab what the difference is between a standard trafficking the kids because he hadn't picked them up from lowes yet thank you you know own that thank you i will own that all right story two oh yeah there's two more paragraphs for anybody who wants to dig in there's 350 hard-working mississippi employees do you have a picture

no none of it you have no picture there is a There is this article auto-generated a Dodge Ram ad. Oh, well, look at that. Yeah. Dodge Ram. If there are any pictures of Big Bertha, post them up on the Facebook page. Join the Facebook page if you get a chance. It's facebook.com slash don't people tell. All right, one more segment.

Give us a little tease of what we're going to hear in the last. A couple is accused of indecent exposure. I love it. The couple that gets naked together in public stays together. We'll be back with more Dumb People Town right after this. Stick around.

Make a sound. There's more Dumb People Town. All right, let's get into some names. Last couple of names. You ready? Here's the last names for the trip. And we can't stress enough how much we appreciate you guys switching over to Patreon. Get on the Patreon now.

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And it puts you into the community even further and that's all we want to do is build this nice community so let's thank these people who gave. You ready?

Andrea Morris. Andrea Morris. A.M. A.M. and P.M. Sarah Jensen. Hi, Sarah. Sarah Jensen. Sarah, thank you for being in this time. Good old Sarah Jensen. I have the Jensen file right over here. Get it to me right now, immediately. Heather Larson. Heather Larson! I love it. Great name. Looks like a name that was just supposed to be on the back of a basketball jersey. Is that Jay Larson's wife? Could be. Maybe. I love it. Great name. Looks like a name that was just supposed to be on the back of a basketball jersey. Is that J. Larson's wife? Could be. Maybe.

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You know, all of her friends in high school just called her Heilberger. Oh, of course. People didn't even know her first name. H-B. I think I have certain friends called her Lohberger. I'm not going to Lohberger. That was just their little joke. All right.

You ready for this next one? Yep. Joshua Thomas Sumrall. Thank you, JTS. He definitely is good at beach volleyball. And that's not just because I was thinking of C. Thomas Howell. Okay. Fair enough.

Thank you guys so much. We love that you support us, and we love that you donated to the Drip Foundation and whatnot. The Drip Foundation. Our Drip. It is. But we built that foundation. We did build that city. We all stand on it together. And we built that city on rock and whatnot. The Drip Foundation. Our Drip. It is. We built that foundation. We did build that city. We all stand on it together.

And we built that city on rock and roll. We did. What I want you to do is now join the Patreon. It's very simple. Go to patreon.com slash dpt. Is it slash dpt or dumb people town? Dumb people town. Slash dumb people town.

Patreon.com slash dumb people town. Yep. Go there. Sign up. Become a Patreon member. And reap the benefits of being a part of this community we love it so much we're going to continue to give you guys new stuff maybe a new piece of merch that's only exclusively available if you're a patreon member maybe posters that are signed by

us good stuff is coming on the horizon we love the patreon people they're great to work with and we're thinking of new fun stuff to do with you guys so thank you for supporting and for those who haven't supported, hop on board right now. Let's get back to the show. Alright guys, welcome back to Dumb People Town. We're going to mention that, hey, if you live up north, Northern California, please come see

us. We will be at the Livermore Art Center, the Bankhead Theater, which is a giant theater. And I think we- What is the date? That's July 13th. That's a Saturday night. I think we've sold 11 tickets.

No, there's like 500 seats. People are going to come out, guys. I hope so. It's a really beautiful venue. Nate Fridson is opening for us, and we're really, really excited. And live at Dumb People Town at Largo. Two days later.

Two days later on the 15th and our guests are Patton Oswalt and Lauren Lapkus. Nice. And musical guest is one half

of the Milk Carton Kids, Joey Ryan, who is so funny. Those guys are great. So talented. Those guys are great. And so he's going to be learning

our theme song and doing his folky version of it, which is so cool. Summertime at Largo on July 15th. Get your tickets now. That will sell out.

Guys, any live shows that you guys are doing? Producing or in or up to? I do a bunch over at West Side Comedy in Santa Monica. Sure. I got to do a show with you guys for a while. That was so much fun.

That was really fun. We did kind of an improvised version of Making a Murderer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Making up a murderer. Yeah, he was Ken Kratz. Oh, nice. I had the prize. Everybody who was on the stand

randomly pulled out of a bucket what their name was and what their occupation was. I love it. Which was pretty fun. Great. I do a monthly show there called Pretty Pretty Pony,

which you've also done as a monologist. It's the first Thursday of every month there at 10 o'clock p.m. And I have a show at Dynasty Typewriter that's monthly.

It's the last Wednesday of every month. No conflict with any of these other names. No, no, you can go to those. I know you've already purchased tickets to in the time it's taken me to say these words called Work Juice Improv. It is the Thrilling Adventure Hour improvisers

from that group, from the Thrilling Adventure Hour. Paul F. Tompkins, Mark Agliardi, Craig Kikowski, Annie Savage, Hal Lublin, me. Love, love, all. And we always have a fun monologist. Last month we had Patrick Brewster, and it was crazy. Oh, I love it all. So check it out, Dynasty Typewriter.

Last Wednesday of every month. Right. And the name of it one more time. Work Juice Improv. Okay, good. Check it all that out. And DanielVanKirk.com for all of his dates coming up because his live dates are amazing.

I heard the St. Louis show was awesome. Dude, it was so great. I heard they're playing. St. Louis, we love you. The improv shop was so good And so many townies Who came out That are begging us

It might not be too long guys Before we have a little Dates Many dates coming for you But October 13th We're gonna be in New York So yeah thanks to everybody Who came out to the Gather Tour

And I hope everybody That saw you guys just recently San Francisco The shows were great Cobbs Rock was awesome Thank you to all of our people But yeah that is a big date That we're doing

A live Don't People Town Back at the Bell House in New York. October in New York. Let's go, people. And I'm going to tell you right now that I think the way it's selling right now, we're going to hopefully add a second show, a late show. So we'll announce a guest soon. We're out to a couple people. Which means if we don't add that second show, you better get your tickets right now because otherwise it's just going to be sold out.

And you will not get to see a show. I'm saying don't wait. Get your tickets for the first show and then we'll let you know about the second show. All right, Dan. Ready? Last story. Bozeman, Montana. Been there.

A man and a woman were arrested in Bozeman. Bozeman, by the way, just so people know, it's not just crazy Montana where people are driving 90 miles an hour, and they just shoot their guns at babies. No, it is a very cool college-y town that has a lot of culture and great restaurants, and it's just an interesting, with an interesting town. You don't expect to see this craziness, so go ahead. That also started the start of a screenplay.

Exterior. Bozeman, Montana. Bozeman, Montana. I'm already in. Tumbleweed flies by. Bozeman, Horsejack, Montana. Naked Tumbleweed flies by. Azeman horse jack, Montana. Naked tumbleweed flies by. A man and a woman were arrested in Bozeman after allegedly having sex in a local hot

springs children's pool. No. Within feet of children swimming. No. What? Do you just get to walk up and punch one of them in the mouth? I would start kicking with my shoes on in their face. Which means you're in a pool, you'd probably have to go put your shoes on.

I would go put them on. I would walk over. Come back and just start kicking them. Put the heel of my shoe into their nose and eyes. If you are an adult, you have another place to go. I don't understand. You want to have sex in a urine-filled pool?

It's like a kid's pool. Does that get you going like a kid crying nearby? I hope not. If you like kids crying and having sex in pee pools, you can buy a Discman and get your own pool. I'm not going to shame you at all.

It's weird and the crying part creeps me out. Do it on your own time with no actual people involved. That is so over the top. Yeah. It's an affront. Was it for charity?

Yep. In a charity event that Bozeman Montana officials are calling a complete failure, Don Daniel Klein. This was an idea gone awry. Don Daniel Klein, DDK. DDK. was an idea gone awry dawn danielle klein ddk ddk and aaron hayes miller i know aaron hayes yeah were arrested on friday and charged with indecent exposure klein appeared in gatling county justice court on monday her bail was set at five thousand dollars miller's group appeared uh scheduled to appear tuesday according to court documents... Separated the two. Why?

I don't... They're both part of it. That's what I wanted to say earlier when you said the couple in decent exposures together stays together right up until they get put in separate cop cars. Right. No, they have to because they're worried that they'll just start having sex in the back of a cop car. According to court documents, a Gatlin County sheriff's responded to a sexual crime report

at the Hot Springs on Gatlin Road around 1.15pm on Friday. These kids aren't supposed to be here. Weekend's coming early, guys. That's his nickname, Weekend. When the deputy arrived, the couple had already left the premises. They were located and stopped

by law enforcement further south on Gatlin Road. Are they walking in anybody else's mind? They're naked and they're driving. Oh, I like them. Maybe they're walking. A barefoot towel walk. I think that they're on bird scooters. They're what? On bird scooters, just scooting down.

Naked with towels running. One between the two of them, though, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Balls flapping in the breeze. When the deputy said they caught them at Gatlin Road, the hot spring manager. She's driving and he's in the back. And he's holding her stomach. Why not?

Gender assigned who drives that bird. The Hot Springs manager and four witnesses said they saw Klein and Miller having sexual intercourse in the children's pool. Court documents state one witness reported seeing Klein's bare buttocks when approaching the couple to ask them to stop. You don't need to approach. You yell from wherever. And you don't ask either. Yeah, that's another. You don't ask.

How polite. This is not Jeopardy. You don't have to phrase it in the form of a question. I hate to intrude. What? No, you don't. Why are you being like that? Why are you being polite?

Do you mind it if I heal you to the nose, like six sharp heel kicks to your face. Would that affect your performance? It's bad enough that you brought outside food and beverage in, which we really frowned upon. That's what I love. They start listing things they didn't say to you before. And then you ran. You ran. You ran on the deck of the pool, which clearly says no running.

We know you didn't shower before leaving the locker room. Or after. Yeah. And one of you had diarrhea within two weeks. You're not allowed to go in. But aside from all that. And perhaps worst of all, you put a used towel on another chair

that you did not use. You cannot reserve three chairs for two people. It's sitting over there. We've watched it sit there for an hour expecting you to have someone else come here. Yeah, this is like Capone. We got you on taxes having sex in a kiddie pool. But really, it's everything else you did have someone else come here. Yeah, this is like Capone. Like, we got you on taxes having sex in a kiddie pool, but really it's

everything else you did that was egregious. Thank you. The deputy said video surveillance from the hot springs showed Klein and Miller engaging what appeared to be sexual intercourse and that more than once Klein was visibly not wearing a bra. It's our

pornhub. First of all, I like that it's appeared to be as if one of their arguments is going to be, we were just faking. It's like soft core. You actually couldn't see. You pranked all you kids. You can't prove that we actually were having intercourse. There was no real penetration. That's right.

Like Klein and Miller does sound like a morning sports talk radio show with like Reggie Miller and like Dave Klein. The deputy said several children were also in the pool and could be seen while Klein and Miller engaged in the act. I hope that's the other end of the pool. By the way, even if there were no kids in the pool and they're just doing it in a kid's pool, it is still inappropriate. Disgusting and inappropriate. Maybe. Okay, listen. Here's my pitch.

They didn't know it was a kiddie pool. I said kiddie. They did not know it was the kiddie pool. They didn't know it was a kid's pool. This is if there were no kids in it. No. Here's what. Because the pool is just big enough that they were like, we saw the kids from a distance

and they look like small adults. They were far enough away. She has no depth perception. You can't tell. We thought we were in the adult pool. Or he calls his testicles his kids. Right. And thought, oh, let's go to the kids pool.

Let's take the kids to the pool. He thought genetically it was the right way to go. For sure. Let's drop the kids in the pool. I just want to show you the twins. Fair enough. In the kids' pool. That's right.

Court documents state that when the couple was interviewed, Miller, that's DDM, Don Daniel, You know it. claimed that they were stretching. And while Klein said they were just dry humping, they did try to come up with... They did say it was an actual vacation. We were stretching.

I don't think you can dry hump in a pool. But I want them to say it at the exact same time. Like Randy says stretching and the other one like... We were just dry humping. Get out of here on this. We're going to double dip it. And then they reverse.

Just like they did. He says what she said, she says what he said. It's hilarious. We were dry humping. We were dry humping. I mean, it's dry humping. All right. We're going to go like this. Double dipping?

Double dipping. Just like they did? Yes. Like he tried to do. How old do you think Don Daniel Klein and Aaron Hayes Miller are? So we're going to give me two numbers. We'll see if anybody can get both of them right. You are our guest. You can go first, Tig, third, or fourth.

Maybe we should work as a team. You can do a team. What era were the names Aaron and Dawn popular? Now I don't think that they've been popular for a number of years. But it's Montana. Bozeman. Well, I own that. I own that it's Montana.

Sometimes it's Montana. I own that. I had a's Montana sometimes it's Montana I own that I had a few classmates named Don in the 80s so I feel like they might be in their 40s somewhere not that we are no no no no no if you pile on a decade sure yes if that's a fair guess I'm looking forward to my 16th

28th birthday that's right it's gonna be good I feel like he's a she's older than him in this scenario. Ooh, I like it. I really do. It is showing your work. You guys did really good on tests. Because she's the one who said they were stretching.

Now, she's the one who experiences more arthritis than he does. So, yeah, she's older. Post-coital stretch. Give me numbers. Give me two numbers. She's 46 and he's 43. He's 43. He's straight up 40.

Oh, he's 40. Okay. Oh, he's 40. Okay. 46 and 40. This is like CSI Vagina. Yeah. We won't get pooled again. Daniel Van Curse. I love that.

Here we go. I think she's 26. Okay. And he is 11. No. And he is 11 No And he is 29 Okay I'm gonna say she is 29

Okay And he is 56 None of you got any of the numbers right Alright Dawn Danielle Klein Is younger Aaron Hayes Miller is older The granddad was right the numbers right. All right. All right. Don Danielle Klein is younger. Aaron Hayes Miller is older.

The granddad was right. And their ages are 33 and 37. Wow. Well. Old enough to know better. Not old enough to not be able

to pull this off. What isn't old enough to know better but also illegal at a certain age? I don't know. 20s you can be like, what are you doing?

30s. We were high. We were drunk. 30s is kind of like, if you're making that mistake in your 50s, you're like ready to die. I wonder if he took the means of all of our things or whatever, he would have had it exact. It might have been perfect. I said 29,

26. I was not that far off. There's got to be a townie out there that when I post this on the Facebook page will tell us what the mean was. Great. 36 and 33. So it's 34 and a half. Yeah, that's theirs. But of all the numbers you guys said.

All of our numbers put together. It probably is very close. That's their. Yeah. There you go. That's it. That's our show friends. Look at that.

Thank you guys for being on the show. We love having you on. Janet Varney. We'll have you back. Janet Varney. Cool. Good luck with everything that you're doing. Follow them on the Twitters.

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Go get your tickets for Sketch Fest, which, you know, they always have the best stuff. It's fantastic. It's such a fun thing. And then come see us. Follow us on Twitter.

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Stick around. Make a sound. Calm your down. It's Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb. Stick around. Make a sound. Calm your downies. Dumb people town.