Dumb People Town - Justin Martindale - Chateau De McDonalds

Episode Date: September 23, 2022

This week Justin Martindale comes to town to hang with Daniel, Randy and Jason. This week's story is about a drive-thru stand off!

Skypains Avenue Hey, townies, welcome to another episode of Dumb People Town. Population U. Population Martindale. Justin, I'm calling you J-Mart from now on. That's fine. Yeah, people call me J-Mart. Do they? Is that a thing? You are... We won't get into the depth of this, but I will say this about

us. Whenever we see you, it just makes me happy. It's like, I texted you this the other day. It's like, anytime I'm walking down the hall of the Comedy Store and you're there, I'm like, oh, thank God. Aw, same. There are those people there who then you walk down the hall, you comedy store and you're there, I'm like, oh, thank God. Oh, same. There are those people there who then you walk down the hall, you see them, you're like, oh, God. The thank goes away. The thank leaves.

And so I say, thank God. We just enjoy you so much. And I love your podcast. And I love it all. Your clips are now like, you know, cycling through my TikTok. Oh, good. I just love it so much. Good.

We'll get into all of that. We got a story. We have one dumb story and then you will share a dumb story from your life with us at some point okay we get them sent into us daniel's got ready yeah sent in by carlene mcdermott at she be carlene she sends us a lot of stories yeah oh good great great carlene um we haven't said in a while if you want to be as wonderful as carlene. McDermott. McDermott.

Just go to Twitter at DanielVanKirk, hashtag dumbpeopletown, and that's how stories get into us. That's how he knows who sent them when. Okay, ready for this? McDonald's customer blocks drive-thru over McMuffin. The amount of control people think they have in this world. Yeah. By the way, that is a lot of control. Yeah. If you're three cars behind that guy. And you have car behind you by the way i said it was a guy i

didn't even know it was a guy but i'm like before we even say anything i'm just gonna show you the guy this that'll tell you everything you need to know and what did he do he blocked it he blocked the drive-thru over a mcmuffin i mean this is the guy who does that yes yeah the balls on that but here's the twist. What? We do, sometimes we do this new feature because there's a Reddit thread called Am I the Asshole?

Oh, yes. Where people tell a story and then everybody tells them whether or not it's you or somebody else. This was not one of those, but by the end, I'm going to ask you

if you still think he's the asshole or not. Do we think he's justified in doing this? Because, by the way, I never want to jump on the side of McDonald's. But I feel,

right, Justin? But I feel, you're more of an arby's guy oh god hey but this guy this guy looks like his nick his initials could be rb and he wants people to call him rb sure yes this takes place in the uk this comes from uk news.yahoo and you can hold that up so high yeah you can mcdonald's isn't that like a little more glamorous? Yes. Randy, we were just in France. We were in Chamonix, France, and there was a McDonald's in the town. Yeah.

And it was like 11 at night, and the guy who was working there was like sweeping off the front desk, the front like step. Front desk. Front step. Sweeping off the front step. By the way, Justin, there was a front desk. A front desk of the McDonald's. It has booze. That is booze. Chateau de McDonald's. I checked of the McDonald's. That is booze.

Chateau de McDonald's. I checked into the McDonald's. Can we get a table bolted to the floor? I ordered two McMuffins and extra pillows. Oh, wow. Whoever was working the front desk of McDonald's was doing a great job. Their booths are made of marble. They were so happy and proud to be sweeping off the front steps.

These guys have a lot of pep to the step. Tone it down, man. You're working at McDonald's. McDonald's customers sparked a standoff after blocking a drive-thru amid a row over sausage and egg McMuffins. Stuart Yates refused to move his vehicle. Steve Norton Yates' cousin. And his wife then somewhere said, at least he's not yelling at me. His ex-wife. His ex-wife.

His ex-wife. Stuart Yates refused to move his vehicle from the drive-thru window after he said staff asked him to wait in the car park for his food order at a McDonald's in Leyland, Lancashire? So they're not saying we don't have the food you want, and they're not saying get the fuck out of here, we're not serving you right they're saying go wait over there like everyone's done right everyone's done hey we need to like stock it up or whatever we're cooking it just we'll bring it out in the bag so these people don't have to wait for you or you ordered something special that's going to take us a second yeah everything else is just ready to be popped in the mind sure i'm telling you right now my early like temperature he's the asshole There's no way I won't think he's the asshole. But let me say this.

You know as he's sitting there and the window goes back up, he said the phrase, going to tell me. Going to tell me. I got to roll over that. People have been telling him to do stuff, and this is like the final straw. Yeah. This is the snap. Yeah.

This is his falling down. This is his Michael Douglas. Okay. So in that vein, I'm not going to go against Jason there, but there are moments where you're like, if one more person says this to me or this happens. But you would be the asshole because they're just one person. They're getting you your food. Yates claimed he had complained on a previous visit to the drive-thru

after being asked to wait for his food in the car park. And you know how everyone at Worcester McDonald's is like, oh, you're back again. We'll make sure that the thing that happened to you last night won't happen again. Won't happen again, right. That's McDonald's. And he's like, oh, I wish a bitch would. Of all the shifts, though. This bitch.

Of all the shifts. A bitch would. That's the. Ba-da-da-da-da. I am not loving this. I am not loving it. I am not loving this. But don't you think of all the shifts at McDonald's... But he still sings the song.

Yes, contractually. He's got to do it. Of all the shifts at McDonald's, don't you think the morning breakfast shift probably has the most regulars? Like, you know 80% of the people coming through there. For sure, for sure. Here comes our bitch.

And 80% of those... How many people at McDonald's do you... Oh, you think, me again? Like when they get to the thing and they're like, oh, you want three Diet Cokes?

But I bet they're all friendly. I bet they're all friendly. You know, it's like... Yes, yes, yes. You got your regulars. And we have to respect McDonald's employees for getting up at like 4 a.m.

and like being there. And their partners don't know that they're there. No. So they're like, we have to get rid of the evidence of the bag before that. There's a lot of eating in the car.

So Jay and I worked at like full service gas stations before we went to college. And like people would drive up in the morning on their way to work and you just knew what cigarettes to get them. So like it was like Benson and Hedges menthol extra ultralight, boom. Oh, that's a classy lady.

Menthol ultralight 100s. Ultralight 100s. Oh, that's a classy lady. Ultralight 100s. Ultralight 100s. Virginia Slim 600s. Oh, you're a nurse? Eve 120s. I got you. Okay. So in that same way, Dan, I understand what you're saying.

Somebody pulls up and they're just like, hey, Carol. How you doing? The three diet jokes. I like one Diet Coke. A lot of us are like the second Diet Coke. And I know that I'm just going to go into it. lot of ice. I like the second Diet Coke. And I know the ice is going to go into it. Right. I bet you I'm right.

Dan, I guarantee you there is a three Diet Coke lady. In the morning. Oh, yeah, for sure. Two of them, no ice. Because she's like what Rand said. I need a cup filled with ice. Yes. A cup filled with just soda.

Right. And then one that's half and half. Yeah, for the drive. There's that woman. And you're like, and wait. And you're like's half and half. There's that woman. And you're like, and like, why are you single? I need one for my cats.

Okay, okay. You just said it all. Stuart. I knew a girl real fast. I knew a girl who would carry a, she would have a 12 pack of Diet Coke

in her car at all times. At all times. In Texas. What? So she would just have hot, hot, hot backseat Diet Coke and'd be driving, and she'd be like, and just drink it like it was cold, and I was like, who is this mutant?

Hot backseat Diet Coke. Yeah, Texas Diet Coke. By the way, hot backseat Diet Coke could be describing Britney Spears today. Well, yeah. Is she having a moment, or is she hot backseat Diet Coke right now? like Britney Spears today. Well, yeah. Is she having a moment or is she hot backseat Diet Coke right now? I mean, till death. Yeah.

She's from Texas. No, she's from Louisiana. That's a whole other place. Stuart Elton Yates said on this occasion he refused to wait in the car park. Yates added that he was offered a refund by staff, and he wanted it put back on his card. So they go, fine, you don't want to wait? We'll refund you.

He said, okay, put it back on my card. Because he doesn't want the change. Because he already paid. Yeah. Because it's going to be annoying change. Well, yeah, change is just annoying. Put it back on my card. Right.

Coin change, not like positive change. No, no, no. Positive change. Change is annoying. I mean, positive change can be annoying too. He said, put it back on my card. He claimed an employee threw his money onto his car roof and warned him to leave or she would call the police. I love it.

Now, hold on though. You're still saying he's the asshole? Yes. I don't know that she did that. She didn't do that just because. Yeah. She had to be pushed. I don't know that she did that. She didn't do that just because. Yeah. She had to be pushed. She got pushed.

He definitely said something. He says he called her a cunt or something like that in the morning. And I mean, can I say that? Yes. Sure. In the morning. Well, it's in the UK. That's their good morning to each other.

Yeah. Yeah. Fuck it. These cunts. All right. But wait. But what I don't understand is- I'll tell you what.

Let's say I didn't cuss. And I go, hey, you need to wait. And I don't have time. I go, I can't wait. Just give me a refund on my card. And they go, cool. And they throw the change on top of my room. That's extreme.

I am now – I go, okay, we're in. We're in. You want to play ball? Let's dance. Dan, I do get – I just keep mixing my metaphors. I get slightly upset when I'm at the supermarket,

and they're handing back change from anywhere and they just give you the receipt and the change. It's just in a big cloth. There is a certain amount of use sorted out. You're walking around with a seven-year-old who doesn't know what to do with money. Yeah, because now I have to wait and undo it. It must be so hard. I'm going to say this on behalf of customer service people.

It must be so hard from going two years after a pandemic the mentally ill people that they have to deal with now all of us i went to a grocery store yesterday and there was a a lane that was open and the girl had her back to me and i looked at her and she looked at me and shed her mask on i go oh are you open she goes i am now and i was like i was like i'm sorry i don't know what to tell you. I don't know what to say. We made eye contact. There was that exchange.

Had she had a roll of nickels and just thrown them at me, then I would have been like, okay. I don't think they just threw them at you out of nowhere. He definitely said something. He's definitely trying to beef it up because he knows what he did was wrong. He upset those people behind him in line. And they threw the money. It's like a kid trying to tell a story on their brother or sister. Even if he did say something, and you're the manager of Carol,

and they go, well, what happened? Well, after Carol threw the money on top of his roof, wouldn't you go, Carol? Who else is saying she threw the money? No, it's there. It's on the roof of his car. But what was it, like a carnival booth? A toll booth? Like it she threw the money? No, it's there. It's on the roof of his car. What was it, like a carnival booth? A toll booth?

It stayed on the roof? Did he win a bag of goldfish? Pretty good toss. Let's keep going. After threatening to stay there, quote, all week if necessary, for $1.29, Stuart Yates blocked the drive-thru for how long until police finally arrived? He's going to do this.

Until police arrived. How long, Justin, do you think he blocked the drive-thru? In the morning. For a sausage McMuffin. I'm going to say there's a commute happening. People are outraged. I'm going to say 45 minutes. 45 minutes, Jason?

I'm going to say two hours. Two hours? Into lunch. Yeah. They had to undo that whole line. Yeah. Or they had to walk out people's stuff as they walked around the other area. I think an hour.

An hour? Yeah. Okay. We're going to take a quick break. When we come back, I get to do a couple of shout outs, or we all do, actually, for people who are our Patreon members. We'll find out how long he shut down this line before cops got there, and we can tell everybody what we have going

on i don't like them all right we'll be right back after this stick around make a sound there's more hey guys welcome back to the show uh before we get into how you can support justin martindale and all of his awesome podcasts sure and how he how he supports you. Yes, we want to remind people this comes out when? On the 23rd. So Randy and I tonight are in Ann Arbor, Michigan, doing a show at the Ann Arbor Comedy Showcase. You're going to go to the game tomorrow? Game tomorrow and then two shows tomorrow night.

I think these shows will sell pretty well, but we would love to see all of our fans be there. Oh, the best people should be there, and that's people who listen to this show. Great shows. Our kids might even come watch the show. Yes. So definitely come see us do that.

And then we are doing a little mini dumb run in October. I'm sorry, on October 7th, Randy and I are headlining a show at the Thousand Lakes Festival, Comedy Festival in Minneapolis. It should be really fun. So check that out. Yeah, and then we have our dumb run for the kids. On the 13th, we're in Nashville at the Hutton Theater in the Analog Room. Next night in Chicago at the Den Theater.

We're doing a stand-up show. If you buy it, I'm going to say this to camera, wherever you can look at this. If you get a ticket for both, you get a little bit of a discount. And by both, I mean the stand-up show and the podcast. It's going to be a fun Friday night in Chicago. They're going to be really fun. We got you covered on that Friday night, October 14th. Saturday, you guys are going to go to Oklahoma Tulsa, do a little casino.

We're doing River Spirit Casino. And I'll be in New York doing a show in New York on the 15th. I love it. And then on the 16th, we're at the Bell House. We come back together and do the Bell House live down at People Town. Andrew Dismukes, Roy Wood Jr., and the band Cut Worms. It is going to be awesome. And hey, guess what?

These are my final dates for the year, I think, of my tour. I have a big project coming up at the end of the year. So on the 5th, 6th, 7th, and 9th, I'm going to be in Austin, Lafayette, Houston, and College Station, Texas. So go to DanielVanKirk.com for all that jazz. Justin, how can people follow you, listen to you, all that great stuff? You know what? Follow me on Instagram at JustinMartindale. I for all that jazz. Justin, how can people follow you, listen to you, all that great stuff? You know what? Follow me on Instagram at Justin Martindale. I post some dates up.

I got some October dates and November dates, but I post that on my Instagram. And then I have a podcast called Just Sayin' with Justin Martindale. And you just had Sherry O'Terry. Just had Sherry O'Terry. Sherry O'Terry was so funny. I went viral. I was in Vogue India. What?

Yeah. That's great. Because was in Vogue India. What? That's great. Because J-Lo hates Virgos, apparently. I broke that story. You're welcome. I hope everyone slept better at night. I do. I did.

So funny. How wonderful is Sherry O'Terry? You gave J-Lo the stomach bug. I love Sherry O'Terry. Sherry O'Terry is the best. I want her in more things. Me too. She does not get the respect. What she did on SNL

Oh my god She's just funny She's just that lady Like she's Like I look at her And Like How Jean Smart got hacks

I need Sherry O'Terry To have Molly Shannon had White Lotus Yes And the other What's that other Showtime Show that's out

Oh she was in She's in the other two Maya Rudolph I need the ladies of SNL to kind of have their own. Sarah Terry was great in Those Who Can't, and we got to know her a little bit through that. She also is someone who I'll

do a Facebook post of me and my son and she'll like it. She'll be like, that's such a great picture. I love that you just did that. Here's why she's going to be okay, because she has as Dan described, immense talent. And I was watching her. This came across my TikTok, I believe.

I was watching her tell a story. And first of all, it's so hard when someone tells a story to then react to it and be funny. You were killing me with your reactions to her story. Oh, man. I was laughing at you, laughing at it. It just was pure joy. Well, just having her sit there and do the Barbara Walters in front of me,

I was just like, because my teenage self, watching her and Will doing the Spartans and everything, and you're just sitting there like, wow, this is one of those moments. Her towelling off and cooling off after the cheers,

to me, was as funny as ever. So there's a little switch that flips in her that I know you know, that where it's like, oh, we're going, we're doing this. And usually the best people, like you know who was great at this

was like Jeff Richards, another SNL guy, where like a little switch would flip in him and he's now in this mode and you're like, oh my God, these guys are just so talented. And that's what made me laugh about her and that's I guess kind of an influence on my style of comedy

is just her manicness of just like, what? Oh, no, we're not? Oh, okay. It's just like that. I was like, oh, just the little idiosyncrasies of her just being like, no, okay, go. And when does Just Sayin' drop every week? It comes out Tuesday night Pacific

Standard Time at 9pm on all platforms and then the video comes out the following Monday on the Comedy Store's YouTube page. Wonderful. Hey a couple of shout outs. We have a couple of townies. Jeff Donaldson. Jeff Donaldson. Jeff Donaldson. Right fielder for the Toronto Blue Jays.

Tom Burton. Tom Burton. You know he's either be 23 or 58. I was going to say he's went a different way than Tim, but Tom still does his own thing, and that's all that matters. He's either the superintendent of the apartment building

or the guy who called him. I loved his movie The Night After Christmas. And this next person is a true local, and for some reason when I read their name, I read it in the vein of Carly Simon. Travis Ray. Travis Ray. You probably think this song is about you. Travis Ray. Travis Ray. You probably think this song is about you.

Travis Ray. Travis Ray. Okay. How long? I love, if it's true, I love that Mick Jagger sang backup on that song, and it was kind of about him a little bit. I don't think it was, but he sang backup on that song. Your Sylvain.

It was completely about what's his name baby yeah that I thought it was but there was some talk that it could have been about Mick Jagger and then Mick Jagger is like I'm gonna come sing back up on this song which is about me uh Carly Simon the OG Taylor Swift with all of these mysteries and easter eggs anticipation it was good okay who's it about? It keeps making me. All right. What? What did we say? How long this guy?

What did you guys all say? I said 45 minutes. Stuart Yates. I said an hour. I said two hours. Okay. Well, he sat in that line, that drive-thru line, until cops showed up. One of you is exactly right, Chase.

Oh, wow. So now we get to play who do you think is right? You can stick with yourself or you can change to somebody else's answer. Justin, what do you want to do? I'm going to stick with my answer just because it's a drive-through. Sure. 45 minutes is a long time. I'm going to stick with mine too.

I'm staying on my spot. He held up the drive-through line for two hours. Whoa! That is so much. Yates said, quote, I said, I'm not moving. I'm well within my rights asking for a refund to be put back onto my card. Who the fuck are you, Lizzo?

He's not wrong. Shut up. Like, you don't get to make those claims. Do you have a tab at McDonald's? Put it on my card. I'm not moving. What are you, having a moment? Yeah.

Come on. They eventually gave me a refund and tried passing me a long letter they had typed out, but I refused to accept it. Type out? That's how long you've been there. They're typing up a letter. That's how long you've been there. Wait, does McDonald's have computers? In France, they do.

At the front desk. Right away at the front desk. Then he said, I hadn't sworn. I hadn't done anything threatening i hadn't broken any laws i'm gonna i'm gonna tell you also obstructed business and you're an asshole you did damn he's an asshole you don't have to swear i watched the video of him being interviewed while he's still in his car someone was filming him he does not seem like he's irrational yes but he's british dan, Dan. British people can mask that.

You know what I mean? You know how to repress their feelings. They know like fancy words and vowels. Yates arrived at the restaurant around 9.30 a.m. Yeah, you were right into lunch. Until 11.30, man. And ordered two double sausage and egg McMuffins for his son and a friend. You don't need that.

Were they in the car? Was the son and the friend in the car? No, he was being a good dad. No, he wasn't. Or he's lying. There was no children at all the whole time. I knew you were going to say that. It's like six cents.

There was no one there. He knows. He's a ghost. Yeah. Other customers had to reverse out of the drive-thru while it was forced to close as he protested. Damn. A week ago, I got made to wait in the car park when they didn't have my food ready for

how long? So remember, this is his second time. So how long do you think he had to wait the first time that made him so pissed? So he ordered food, wasn't ready, and they're like, go over there and park and we'll bring it to you. So now I'm going to ask you, how long do you think he had to wait for food in a car park the last time he was there that he was so pissed he was not going to do it again. This will determine whether I'm on his side or not.

So the first time was two hours that he made everyone wait. No, no, this is the second time. This is the second time. But remember the first time. The first time was how long he had to wait in the car park. That's why he wouldn't go over to the car park because he said, no, the last time you guys made me wait and I was there for how long? So how long was it? Is this turnabout as fair play?

Two hours? What do you think? Maybe an hour. Okay. Okay. Because if he can wait an hour you think? Maybe an hour. Okay. Because if he can wait an hour, he can wait another hour. I'm going to say 30 minutes. 30 minutes.

I'm going to say 45 minutes. And it just, like Justin said the first time. Because I will be honest. If the last time I went there, they made me wait for 45 minutes. Dan, I'm telling you, this is where it all hinges for me. And then I come back and they go, we need you to wait again. I would say, give me my refund. Or drive down the street to the next McDonald's. Thank you.

Eight yards away. Yeah. The only one in the Shire. Sorry, eight meters away. Eight meters away. Also, I'm still with you. What did the letter say? What did the letter say?

What did the letter say that we want you to sign? Dear Stuart, it's been hours since I've seen it. Well, old Mary Todd's calling, so it must be time for dinner. Okay. They made him wait. I got listed a laugh on that one. It was Abraham Lincoln, I guess. Yes.

Thank you. Do you know what movie, though? I was going to say Lincoln, but Vampire Killer? No. No. You're right to think it's not that linear, though. Interview with a Vampire Killer? No.

No, that was not Lincoln. No. Just kidding. Hateful Eight Interview with a vampire? No. No, that was not Lincoln. No. No, just kidding. Hateful Eight. Lincoln Lawyer? Okay. A week ago, I got made to wait in this same goddamn car park. I just injected some Midwestern into it.

He didn't say that. In the car park for 15 minutes. Wow, what a dick. That's still, 15 minutes is long. It's not long. It is long. A set at the store. You're at McDonald's. You guys are wild.

Dan, you're at McDonald's. You already hate yourself. It's like the amount of time when you're hanging out backstage with someone. Yeah, 15 minutes is not hard. He said when he pulled up. It depends who you're hanging out with. When he pulled up, a lad spotted me and said, oh, it's him again. That would be me.

But the last time he didn't do anything other than just wait 15 minutes. But he calls back and they're like, oh, it's him again. That would be me. But the last time he didn't do anything other than just wait 15 minutes. But he calls back and they're like, oh, it's him again. It's him again. And now I would be like, oh, they're fucking with me. They're messing with me. Go wait over there. But last time, because last time I complained. They said, go and wait in the car park.

And I said, I'm not going anywhere until I get my food. He has been pushed too far. What do you have to do? Sit in the car with your AC on? How long is your day? A girl came out. This is a quote. A girl came out and threw my money and change onto my car roof and said, leave or I'm calling the police.

Good. I said, I'm not going anywhere until I've had my money put back on my card. It's not a big ask, surely. I agree with him. It's like he's fighting with the outsiders. A staff member said, we asked him to park up and he wouldn't. So now he just sat there. He only wanted a small order.

It would have only taken a minute. Let's be honest. 15. Let's be honest. 15. Let's be honest. Yates eventually left without the sausage and egg McMuffins and ordered two Big Macs via Uber Eats when he got home. Sure. Because it's lunchtime now. Well, yeah.

Breakfast is over. Yes. A spokesman. And his son is still hungry and his son's friend. I mean, his son who doesn't exist. Yes, his son. No, he went and ordered two Big Macs by himself on Uber Eats. Not for his son.

Spokesman for McDonald's told Yahoo News UK. I love the treatment this is getting. We are aware of an incident that took place at our Leland drive-thru at 9.30 a.m. on Sunday morning. We would like to thank our team for handling the situation calmly and professionally. I would go, did they? Did they? I'm not saying he didn't deserve it, but I'm not saying saying they were super professional we will continue to support the police with any inquiries yahoo knees uh yahoo news knees uk approached lancashire police department for comment we'll

get out of here on this how old is stewart elton saw a picture saw a picture but that was a long that was a long time ago it was like you know he's an older guy. You know he's got a kid and a friend. He's 63. 63. 54. 59. 59. One of you is only one year off.

So now you get the option to go up a year or down a year. I love this. Price is right. So you're going up or down. What do you want? You want 62 or 64? Well, I love Spain this time of year. is right so you're going up or down what do you want you want 62 or 64 well i love spain this time of year so i'm gonna uh i'm gonna uh i'm gonna go up we'll go one we'll go 64 i'm gonna

go 58 okay i'm gonna go 55 okay thank you for being here today love you buddy wonderful we can't wait to hear what your own dumb story is for all of our Patreon members. Stuart Elton Yates is 55 years old. Oh! Hey, Sam! Double showcase. Double showcase.

You get both the trailer and the trip to England. McDonald's. And the oven. Front desk. Check it at the front desk. All right, Justin Martindale, we love you. Everybody go check out his podcast, Just Say it in the oven. Front desk. Check it at the front desk. All right, Justin Martindale, we love you.

Everybody go check out his podcast, Just Saying. Follow him. Go see him in his dates in October. Go see Daniel and go watch our UFC show, The Nosebleeds. We love you. And oh, shit, we've got to get back to work. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

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