Dumb People Town - Liza Treyger - Dead Bees in A Dirty Toilet

Episode Date: August 6, 2021

This week Liza Treyger comes to town to hang with Daniel, Jason and Randy. This week's story is another classic story about a Tiddlywink where it shouldn't be.

Skypains, out of here. Hey townies, welcome to a Friday episode of Dumb People Town. Population you. Population Traeger. Lisaisa trager welcome to the show thank you happy to be here it's so good so happy to have you for those of you who don't know she is our camp friend who turned into an amazing comedian even though we're like that many years older than you but uh we were just hanging out with you at the comedy store and watch you just have a rippingly hilarious set in the belly room and you know I mean we've wanted you on for a long

time and this is just so nice that we were able to just be like let's do it right now. And we get to do it in person. It's so nice. I know. Isn't it cool? I just think it's. Cause now it's been a game like SoulCycle they were like no masks and now back to masks in the studio. And it's gas masks at SoulCycle. Which I think is bizarre.

Why are they making you put that on? Because they want to know who's committed. That's like who's here to do it. If you look like Bane, you get to do a free class. Does the instructor wear a mask? Everyone wears a mask. The instructors hate it too, though. Yeah, because they're so muffled, right?

Yeah. So here's my question. As a comedian, because I've done on the Peloton, and I can't handle like 90. I didn't know you were a Peloton boy. Well, no, Jay's got one, and I've gone on the Peloton and I can't handle like 90. I didn't know you were a Peloton boy. Well, no, Jay's got one and I've gone on his. You did? I can't handle 98% of the instructors on Peloton.

2% of them I can handle, but as comedians, when they're like, you gotta change your life. You gotta clear out the cupboard. I love it. You love it? I've cried in SoulCycle.

Yes, me too. You cried. Me too. Gareth Reynolds and I went at Moon Tower in the before times and I was like, Gareth, I didn't know I was going to start sorting shit out. Sometimes it's like the right Rihanna song

with the right message and the right morning and you just feel special. When you don't think you can push, when you say to yourself you can't push, I want you to push. I also go to Diego who is very funny and I do laugh a lot but someone that doesn't like instructors how like you're a comedian you in the context super flamboyant and a dancer and he'll just be like that doesn't make me laugh and I like I love

it so you want like a low-key instructor no I'll tell you what Janelle James does she hates instructors she does the rides where it looks like you're in a mountain or just on a road. She just rides on the road. Put me in the Himalayas. There's a dude on Peloton named Alex Toussaint who feels to me like old Little League coaches, like badass high school sports coaches. And he's into 90s hip hop. So it's tons of 90s hip hop.

That's your wheelhouse right there. And so everyone, he'll be telling you something, and then in the middle of him telling you something, he'll be like, move, bitch, get out the way, get out the way. I thought I told you that we won't stop. I thought I told you that we won't stop. You climbing! You got this!

You climbing higher! We got this! And I'm like, all right, we got this. It's all about the music. I go to themed rides, so I'm going to a Taylor Swift ride on Friday. There you go. Girl, take my daughter with you. How old is she? 16? We got this. It's all about the music. I go to themed rides. So I'm going to a Taylor Swift ride on Friday. There you go.

Girl, take my daughter with you. Yeah. How old is she? 16. She's a big team. She can go. She's still at camp. Camp Ramadu or something. Oh, yeah.

Still. But, you know, when it comes around again. If there was a Peloton course, you know, like the mountains and stuff, but it was just the playa, and all you're doing is riding a bike. Riding through art installations. Wait, is that a Burning Man thing? How much Molly am I on? Randy is a Burning Man thing. I did thing? How much Molly am I on? Brandy is a burning man thing.

I did not. How much Molly are we on? Do you have to take Molly before the Peloton ride? Wait, you don't do that before every SoulCycle? No, but I go high sometimes. I get stoned and go. Do you really? Yeah, sometimes life's hard.

Sometimes working out, you're just like, I have to do it. I'm not in the mood, so I'll take a couple puffs and then I'll go. Perfect. Do what works. All right, well, so I love this. I'm down with working in the mood, so I'll take a couple puffs, and then I'll go. Perfect. Do what works. All right. Well, so I love this.

Adana with working out. Okay, let's go. This discussion is great, but I feel like it is time to jump into a story. I don't even know how we got it. I'm one of those people. You know when people are on a fitness journey, they don't talk about it, and then they become boring? Well, no, no, no. That's what happened.

That was anything but boring as we talked about getting high and then going. But the playa, I just want to say, the hottest, coolest girl from high school, she went to Hawaii at 18 and got married. She started going to Burning Man at like 20, 19. And I just thought she was the coolest person in the world. Then she started going early and helping set up. And her photos were just the hottest thing but now it's so much long i don't know if it's cool anymore right

randy tell her it's cool you loved it he loved it he went two years ago yeah so he so motion i like we he stopped by andy wood he stopped by my camp where i was and then wrote and in the most hilarious way like wrote like the meanest message It's like so anti-Bernie man. He's like oh, I get you just don't want to hang out and see your friends here Okay, Rand. You're an asshole and I just wrote this whole thing on a dry erase board. I was like, thank you motion Yeah, so what's your gift that you give people? What's your trade in exchange? Name you do comedy there. No So I ran karaoke.

So I ran karaoke for nine hours straight. With the meanest German man of all time. I ran karaoke. How that has never made it into your stand-up. Oh, God. It blows my mind. I ran karaoke for nine hours and just basically doing comedy on people. I love it.

And does your wife go or no? Yes, she does. Jason just said talking about, this is essentially what you said, talking about Burning Man is hard to be relatable. she does jason just said talking about this is essentially what you said talking about bernie man is hard to be relatable that's what you just said no when i was jealous of i would want to did you go no i've i i'm not a that's not for me okay i'm not porta potting with goggles sand that's not for me but if i did go i love the girls that wear like bullet things but instead of bullets, it's chapsticks. Yes.

That's a good one. That would be mine. Dan, you would love that. I love that. I'm a chapstick man. Let's get into a story. I'm sorry. Jason's already like, what the hell's going on? Ready?

This is sent in. I am notorious for this. I refuse to do formats. You will derail everything. It's all derailed. Or when people are like, okay, I have to go. I know how to keep them on. Don't worry.

It's Dumb People Time. There is no rail. There is no are like, okay, I have to go. I know how to keep them on. Don't worry. It's Dummy Wheel Time. There is no rail. Yeah, you've got a steering wheel, too. Sent in by Derek L. Manns at Game Design Dude. Not Derek Lipkin? No. Derek L. Manns. Derek L. Manns.

The Lomans of Derek. Stanley Gucci is Derek L. Manns. Tiddly Wink stuck up woman's nose. So now everybody knows where we're going with this. If you're eating lunch, it's up to you. Tiddly Wink stuck up woman's nose. So now everybody knows where we're going with this. If you're eating lunch, it's up to you. Tiddlywinks stuck up woman's nose. Nose isn't an anti-lunch thing, if it was in another hole.

We had a story where these people were eating like months old meat to get high. And people were like, thanks for the warning. I had to stop. I was like, I didn't know. So we weren't on everything. We weren't on everything. But Tiddlywinks to me is the thing.

Did you play it? No. Oh, I thought it was the Teletubby. No, Tiddlywinks is like. That's Tinky Winky. Oh. Tiddlywinks is like. That's not a far bad mistake.

I get that. But it's these little round like plastic things that you push. Yes, you try to pop them. I think it says here. Oh, the little half condoms? No. No. They're like little like checkers type things.

And you press them. Press one on top of another one and it flips it up. But so tiddlywinks is the kind of thing that a sports coach, maybe Alex Toussaint from Peloton, a sports coach would yell at someone about someone who's not paying attention. Like, we're out here doing our work and Johnson over there is playing tiddlywinks with his asshole or something. And then you're like, wait, what?

Which would be amazing if you were doing that. Age appropriate, but amazing. She's sticking tiddlywinks up her nose, and we got a championship to win. That works, too. A woman in New Zealand is breathing a lot easier following the removal of a small plastic disc used in the game Tiddlywinks, which had been lodged in her nose for an insane amount of time. So here's the question. When she goes to get it removed, we've all done dumb things,

and you're just like, to me, when something dumb happens, my first mode that I go into is I got to fix this. How can I fix this before anyone can find out about it? So her going to get it removed is the ultimate submission to I screwed up. Right. Also. She couldn't breathe. I'm going to derail us.

Okay. Derail us. There's a new season of Alone on Netflix. Oh. Okay. I've seen all of it. Are you into Alone? Are you on that train?

I'm saving it for flights. No. I watched an episode, but. It's too lonely. I'm a survivor girl. I do need a little drama between people. Oh, I get that. This is very individual. I like psychological warfare,

not just the starving. That's why you like RuPaul's Drag Race. Yeah. In the most recent season, there's a... I don't want to give away what happens, but there's so many things that can get these people kicked out. Their house starts on fire. recent season there's a part i don't want to give away what happens but you know there's so many things that can get these people kicked out like their hut their house starts on fire or step wrong

or they fall like a guy didn't sheath his ankle and his axe and he fell and it like went into his arm like so many things can happen or you just can't find food dan i watch this show i watch the show because dan told me to watch it and you watch it this is this is my interpretation of the show is that you're watching some guy who like doesn't have kids doesn't have a wife and you're like oh this guy's a loner he was a marine yeah if he wasn't doing this he'd probably be plotting a way to like shoot up a bank don't like let him just do what he does and he's gonna win I'm like there's no this guy's impenetrable and then he he kills a squirrel, and he's like, that squirrel's my dead brother. And you're like, he's gone.

You're out. You're out. Because he's so alone. Like, that was his friend. I would tell people, they don't call it survive. They call it alone. Because that's the problem. What you're saying, too, is the lack of attraction.

So what you love about Survivor, about the psychological games that get played back and forth and I completely get that it's them doing that to themselves the psychological component of these people is how can they exist with their own thoughts and their own issues and I miss my family or I miss this person or I can't do this on my own or maybe I don't have the strength to go forward they should call

alone shouldn't have eaten them fish eggs that's another name I love salmon roe I love fish eggs yes that's another name but i love salmon roe i love fish eggs you do but is it too much sodium why does it fuck them up because sometimes like it's not healthy it's like there there's always much fat or what no there could be like so like the guy's like i don't know these don't smell right and you're like well don't eat don't eat that right you're gonna so anyway in whole season, the guy is just walking around his little area, and a bug just goes in his ear. And he can feel it in there, and he can't get it out.

And this dude is the best. This dude lived with Africans. And you're like, oh, that's how simple it is. That's how simple it is that you're done. And I'm not going to give away what happens, whether he's done or not. But I was watching that, and I'm on a plane watching it, and it is driving me insane that he is talking about it. He's like, I can still feel it. It's in there, and it just went right on in.

It is. And then as you guys were saying, how would that not drive you insane? And then what you were saying about the ways in which you're like, I need to solve this for myself. You've got to just tell me how he got this bug. Because that did happen in Survivor. It happened in there, too? Yeah. Oh, the worst part of Survivor is how you got this bug. Because that did happen in Survivor. It happened in there too? Yeah. Oh, the worst part of Survivor

is the falling in the fire. Remember that? Well, so I have a story. So I talk about Survivor sometimes on stage. I'm in Detroit talking about Survivor. And a guy says,

my girl, her cousin was on Survivor. I go, who is it? And it was season two, Michael, who fell in the fire. Don't you love when that happens and you're like, oh, we're done.

Guys, we're done with the rest of the set. It takes a turn you won't even believe. So I go, oh we're done guys. We're done with the rest of this So I go how is he doing and she goes not good in prison And I was like, oh I thought I was thinking about how is he doing with you know, but what and yeah child porn And he actually was gonna go away for bad business stuff, and the FBI came, but it was all on his work computer. A lot of bad business. So he was just going to go away for business shit, all this child abuse images. It's right where he needs to be.

And he's in prison, and that definitely changed the mood of the audience. Fell into a different fire. But couldn't believe, yeah. But there's a lot of drama. The first Survivor winner went to jail. Right. Richard Hatch. And he has a bunch of hatch babies. He

donated sperm and there's actually a documentary in the works about all his sperm babies. And you know how they're hatch babies because none of them will work close. Okay. Want to go back to this? Tiddlyweek in the nose. Tiddlyweek launched her nose for an insane amount of time. Mary McCarthy was

always wondered why she would frequently have pain on the right side of her nose, but managed to put it to the back of her mind as she went about her life. Which she don't remember. I said she did an insane amount of time. This is like the Simpsons. Yeah. However, after she had a nasal swab test for the coronavirus last October, things got a

lot more uncomfortable. McCarthy from Christ church in new zealand south island told kiwi news outlet stuff that her nose would be constantly leaking i was just in a lot of pain christ church by the way is where flight of the concords are from oh nice the doctors she asked uh the doctor she asked for help told her that it was probably due to a chronic sinus condition she told stuff stuff was like probably due to a chronic sinus condition. She told Stuff. Stuff was like a toxic mail magazine here in the States. Yeah, yeah.

And it still just exists in New Zealand as like a news outlet? Yeah, it is. Stuff. She told Stuff. She told Hustler. She told XL Magazine. She told Jugs. She told Stuff.

She had, quote, quite a lot going on in my life, so I pushed it into the background. Literally. And figuratively. Oh, you did push something up in the background. But it started to become unbearable, and she was forced to go to the emergency department at Christ Church Hospital, where, quote, luckily, the nurse and doctor believed it was more than just sinus pain. Yeah.

That's my own stupidity. They asked me if I'd ever put anything in my nose which brought back a memory. Oh my God. This person. This person. I'm going to ask you guys and then we're going

to take a break. Dummy. So this happened to her when she was a kid? Who knows? Who knows? This is where we get to guess. How many years ago

did she put a tiddly wink in her nose? How old is she at the time of the article? We're going to tell you. We'll probably guess that later as well. I'm going to say

it's been in there for 15 years. 15 years. Jay, what do you think? 25. 25. 27. 27.

Yeah. Okay, we're going to take a quick break. We come back. We're going to talk about everything Lisa has going on and then we'll tell you guys how long this has been.

Okay, this is Dumb People Town. Don't go anywhere. Stick around. Make a sound. There's more Dumb People Town. Don't go anywhere. Stick around. Make a sound. There's more Dumb People Town. Hey, guys. Welcome back to the show. We got Liza Traeger with us.

You can follow her on social media at... Glitter Cheese. Glitter Cheese. That's on both... On everything. It's honestly became an identity. I have a gold necklace that says it. I love it.

It's my album name. It's Glitter Cheese. Album available wherever you get albums. Yeah, and identity I have a gold necklace that says it It's my album name It's Glitter Cheese Album available wherever you get albums Yeah and then I have one friend who's a rapper And she has a fun name so then she calls me Glitter Cheese What's her name? She's Lil Frex Lil Frex and Glitter Cheese To me could be like

Is this on Disney Plus? You guys are two ponies I wish I mean she had I don't know if we'd be free I could do a kid show you could do a kid show I'm actually great with kids and what I love is sometimes my friends husbands don't love me

and my one revenge is their kids are obsessed with you yesterday I left a friend's house and the kid said I miss Lisa and my friend, she had to go. And she went, yeah, but I love her. And I know the husband heard this and he doesn't like it. He didn't like it.

Why? He was not having it. We need to work on our kids who they love. That was his motivation to be like, we now need to do that. That was his opinion. He was mad. Not my opinion. He was mad.

He's never said anything, but I know that it drives him insane. Because why? Once I asked him, I go, what would be the worst thing your daughter can end up being? Like, what's the one thing you just wish your daughter won't do when she's an adult? I'm thinking he would say, exactly. That's the answer I was thinking. And he said, for her to have tattoos. Clearly, I'm heavily tattooed.

You have tattoos. Dude, that's your thing.. Clearly I'm heavily tattooed. You have tattoos. Dude. Not that big of a deal. That's the worst. And then the wife was obviously like, what? And he goes, I just, that's the one thing. And I was like, oh, you don't like what I stand for as a human, I think. Right. Ridiculous.

So wait, so people can, are you doing any live shows and stuff? I'm sorry. Yeah, I'll be in Arizona the 5th through the 8th of August. Where? At the House of Comedy in Scottsdale. And that's nice. I'll be in the pool during the day. Yes, you will.

Ordering Jimmy John's. To the pool, straight to the pool? Yeah. You can order Jimmy John's straight to the pool. Yeah, as long as it's within like one point something miles. Jimmy John's is so annoying. Drop it off at the shallow end.

Freaky fast. Yeah. Is it so fast? Yeah, like they have really strict mileage. Drop it off at the shallow end. Freaky fast. Yeah. Is it so fast? Free smells. Yeah, like they have really strict mileage. You click send and it's there. Within seven to eight minutes sometimes. That's my number one thing to do on the road.

If I go to a hotel, I see if there's a Jimmy John's nearby. Comes super quickly. You have time to shower, nap. What's your go-to? You have Country Club, Turkey Tom. What are you going to do? I'm a beach club girl. Okay, beach club is all right.

But I will do the vegetarian. Sometimes I'll do the vegetarian and add salami. Which defeats the purpose of vegetarian. No, because there's more avocado. And then sometimes I'll make my own slims. I love Jimmy John's. So here's my question. Do you take your feature act on the road with you,

or do you get to pick? I'm not that rich. If I'm in the Midwest, if I can get a Chicago, or they'll give a hotel. Right, right. But I've learned from the best. So I'll always pay for lunch or tips or business.

Right, right, of course. Always. When you go on the road, how is it? I mean, Jay and I go together. Dan goes on his own. But like sometimes Dan, you know, goes out with,

you know, friends or when he's with somebody, he can mix it up with someone that he loves. Is it, how is it for you? It is weird how standards change. Back in the day, I would be in one hotel room with a person

and not care, and now I'm like, I need private time. I don't want to hang out. That's right. Me and Mateo Lane used to share beds sometimes and just sit on our phones watching TV. Hilarious.

That would never be okay anymore. I cannot do that. For either of you. No, no. It would be worse for him. We used to fight a lot. Really? No. Well I'm difficult.

We would like scream at the airport. One time we screamed in the lobby of Sirius XM and Amy Sedaris who we both loved was like watching us from the balcony. Oh my god. We're like, I'm so sorry. And all he said was, wow, really pushing the time and I went, you know what know what okay it's like you

guys are married that's a married relationship wow wow really pushing the time so when someone says a very neutral thing and it makes you guys won't know this what is the thing that will set me off to no end what can my wife say to me that will just do you get the email do you even get the email yes i get the goddamn emails what Do you even get the emails? Yes! I get the goddamn emails! What emails? Do you read them? I mean it's like- Just about anything about their kids.

If anything comes up and I'm like- He's like, what's happening this week? Do you get the emails? Wait, why are wives- Do you get the emails? Do you get the emails? Because I get the emails that tell us what's going on in their kids' lives. Oh, so I guess you don't read the emails. He's like boiling, boiling on the emails.

Yeah, I want them. All right, well go see Lisa Trigger. How can people find, is there a website they can find your kids? Yeah, but I'm bad at promotion. You posted on Twitter where you're gonna be? I tried, yeah, well, go see Lisa Trigger. How can people find, is there a website they can find your kids? Yeah, but I'm bad at promotion. You post it on Twitter where you're gonna be? I try, yeah, yeah, yeah. And Instagram, okay. Just follow her.

I try to. But because we fight so much, I wasn't on time to the airport once, but Mateo's like, I'm not fucking texting that bitch. Nope, I'm going. And then he's sitting and he goes, where are you? I was in bed. Hadn't woken up.

And so the one time he didn't reach out because I yell at him all the time, I missed the flight, and then we were doing a show at a college about failure and we did so bad that they complained to the agents. They didn't want to pay us. Oh my God. Hey, it's a show about failure.

It's a show about failure. We were just showing them what's going on. You're all learned something. Show don't tell. Oh, but how I am on the road, I like to do, sometimes I'll watch Sex and the City or SVU all day one day. Yes. But I try to do at least one activity,

whether it's a movie, an art museum, a pool. Like, you know, I was in La Jolla. I went to the beach. I don't think there's any way to correctly pronounce the name Marissa Hardigay. There is. It's Mariska Hargitay. Mariska Hargitay. Mariska.

I thought it was Marissa Hardigay. Mariska. I like to do a joke where I go, Mariska makes us hard and gay. There you go. That works. That works. Mariska Hardigay Hardigay.

So if people follow you, they'll keep up with your dates. Yeah, and then I have a podcast called That's Messed Up. That's Messed Up. And we'll be on the road. About SVU. Hell yeah. Love it.

And true crimes, and then we interview people from the show. Great. I love it. Dang. Check it out. You hear that, everybody? Captain Cragen. We and then we interview people from the show. Great. I love it. Dang. Check it out. You hear that, everybody? Captain Cragen.

We've talked to him. Captain Cragen. Girl. All right, so check that out. Go see Dan. He's on tour. On tour right now. And doing all kinds of things.

Wait, remember we were talking about something out there, and you were like, save it for the pod? Yes. You were talking about how you, what was the thing? I don't know if you want me to talk. I was on a Zoom bachelorette. Oh, wait. We're going to save that for our Patreon fans.

So save that because that sounds like we're dancing. Dan is on tour. Go see him. DavidRenker.com. If you're anywhere near him. All over the place. And we've got a Patreon page where we're doing new episodes of Cheap Seats. The first time in 15 years we are putting new episodes of Cheap Seats up.

Of our old show from ESPN. Just for you guys. So come check that out. It's been really cool. And people loved it. Yeah. People loved it. It's a beloved show.

We did 77 episodes of that show. That's the most of anything we've gotten better. It's interesting. It's a very low budge version of it. But we were surprised at how close it is to what it used to be. And we had a full production back then. And we're just doing this on a shoestring now But it is the show

I mean that's the To us what we realize I love it Is that it's The future episodes we're picking Include a Battle of the Network stars From the late 70s Cornhole

Which has to be Taken down a peg A high dive A 172 foot high dive at SeaWorld In San Diego That happened in 1983 Which somehow like I think,

dovetailed with the Blackwater scandal. And, you know, Blackfish. Blackfish. Blackfish? Yeah. Blackwater was Middle East. Blackwater was Middle East. Was it Blackfish?

It was Blackfish. It was Blackfish. And then some other thing. Anyway, it's great. It's awesome. So check that out. But when we left- Do you have the same favorite sport or no?

Yeah, all of them. They love indoor soccer and bowling. I love anything. They love underwater competitive welding. So the Olympics, you're on Olympics all the time. I love it. I do. I do.

But I'm like Simone Biles. Simone? Simone. We're not quitting. We're not getting there. She didn't quit. So let's talk about where we were when we left. A woman had a tiddly wink off her nose.

We're trying to guess how many years she had a guess these were years 25 and I said 27 She's had a tiddly wink up her nose up her nose that she didn't remember Until they said you ever put anything up your nose, and she's like oh, yeah, like yeah, I did put something on my nose I did that 37 years something on my nose. I did that 37 years ago.

Oh my God. 37. It's just hard for me to judge her because I have problems and I refuse to go to the doctor for years. But that's

If I've gained too much weight I won't go to the doctor because I'm like I don't want to do that weighing and have me like you need to lose weight. Well now I've lost

but I haven't let them weigh me in decades. Right. You just say no? I go I'm not in the mood but I have a thyroid thing so sometimes I have to and I just turn around and then I say please don them weigh me in decades. Right. You just say no? I go, I'm not in the mood, but I have a thyroid thing, so sometimes I have to, and I just turn around. Gotcha.

And then I say, please don't tell me. Right. Yeah. But you can say, I don't want to, if you want to. I might start saying no. You can refuse. All right. It's like a lawyer.

What are they going to do? It's like a lawyer if you get posted. It's a law. You have to get on a scale. I just got a note from my doctor that said that he's no longer going to be a doctor, or my doctor. You quit? He's out.

I'm like, wait, what? You're my guy. You've got to shove a tiddlywink up your nose. All right. She recalled how at an early age, like many children, she loved to play tiddlywinks. Sure. The game, invented in the UK and patented in 1888, sees players try to propel small discs called winks into a pot using another disc

called a squidger. This is the most I've ever learned about this game. You press it. You press on the front and it flips up into like a pot. She remembered how while playing with her siblings, they improvised the game a little by putting one piece up each nostril and blowing them out. One time, I accidentally inhaled. Instead of blowing out, she she said i remember being terrified

at the time thinking where has it gone uh-huh she soon forgot about the incident although she said soon forgot about it always had problems breathing through her nose but never gave it much thought oh boy this is a person who doesn't she doesn't what else are you ignoring if you're ignoring this for 37 years, like what? Kurt Brunner's bit. What is it? Kurt Brunner's bit about the person, why he won't have political discussions with anyone is because he's like, there's the story of the woman who had 80,000 bees in her ceiling,

in her walls. In her walls. Yeah. And he's like, if I see two bees, I'm like, there is a problem. There's a problem. You didn't hear 80,000 bees buzzing in her walls? You just assumed there's nothing going on? I think it's depression.

Oh, that could be. And then I want them to get help. But if it's just negligence, then I'm angered. You would have an awareness of 80,000 bees. Yeah, for sure. But one time my parents opened the toilet and there was all these bees. It was funny. What? Yeah, I wasn't there, but I got a call

from my parents and they were like our toilet is filled with bees and that's enough to make me never dead but then my dad didn't flush them and then they were just dead bee it was i i have to call them and get more details about that's a funny story it's not a white stripe song dead bees on the dirty toilet dead bees on a dirty toilet and you know i'm not alone Have you done shows At their place in Oh at Third Man Records Yeah Rory Scovel did an album there

We went there and hung out Did you do shows there I did like a This is not happening Oh nice Show there But he wasn't there or anything But it was cool

Yeah Oh my gosh I felt really important Being there Oh it's a phenomenal place It's pretty sweet And we got free merch Right

No but I'm gonna say Like when I used to babysit This is a minor thing It happens to me now too, but people will walk and be like, why are you sitting in the dark? And I won't notice. I didn't realize I was sitting in the dark. Or things will break.

I just will let things be terrible. My air conditioner has been broken and the guy came to fix it yesterday. He goes, how long? I'm like, I've been suffering for months. But your air conditioner hasn't been up your vagina for 37 years. It's an IUD. Medical staff discovered the reason why she was having these problems

after a CT scan revealed an object in her upper nose. Too big to remove while conscious, the object was taken out during an operation where it was pushed through her nose and out her mouth. So they just went off the back door and went to the front yard. It turned out that the COVID test had shifted the disc and caused an infection. Right. Quote, when I woke, I said, what is it?

And they said it was the laugh of the hospital. I'm glad you're laughing. We need the comedy to us. Okay. A tiddly wink was what it was. It hadn't even lost its color. Now, I'm going to ask you guys. I think we have this.

We'll find out quickly. I'm going to hope we do because I can't see the Zoom from here. Right. But I'm going to show you guys the tiddly wink and her. Well, I'll show you the tiddly wink first. This is the size of it. That is not very small. That's about a thumbnail size yeah literally I

know it's like okay she's a woman said that she's breathing a lot easier following their move rate yeah yes things have gone better for her I'm sure she's like can't even believe how good she's right right like those it's like when they put on the cup that I can see color glasses how good she's breathing. Right? It's like those videos. It's like when they put on the I Can See Color glasses on Instagram. That's what she was living out right now. It's like when a deaf child came here for the first time. Who doesn't cry at this? I love those.

Those are really good. Tilly Wink, it hadn't even lost its color, which creeps me out more. She can breathe so well now she realizes she's in a bad relationship. Are you ready for who told Stuff Magazine that it hadn't even lost its color? The doctor. No. Hospital kitchen worker. That's how far through this hospital.

You got to see this. Everyone in the hospital. What did you do in the operation? I brought the apple juice an hour later. Do you think that was a deal of the reporter at the hospital getting a water on their way out and being like, did they tell you about the caller? No, I don't. And then that's how they got on the record. That's who gossips.

When I worked at Summer Camp, that's who you hang out with the kitchen. The kitchen staff knows all. They know everything. Even at the store, I'm always chatting with all the you gotta get the scoop. You hangipper right it's like that's right um they know everything oh the best is when i ask someone like how's your day going and they go some people around here should be fired

and then you and then i'm like who let's get into it let's get into it dan like rolls up his yeah i'm like let's get in let's do a review. Okay. There was calcification around it, and that's probably why my nose had grown a bit crooked. We'll get out of here on this. This is such a fun one. How old? How old is Mary McCarthy? You know it was in there for 37 years.

So she's at least... So what age do you think she was like? I think she was six. I think she was six. So 43. Jay, what do you think? Yeah, I'm in that range. I'd say 40. I'll say 41.

I'm going to say 47. I think she was 10 and just forgot about it. Because there's a lot of stuff that we did at that age that I just, you know, as an older person now. I don't know. I wanted attention too much to like ignore that right I was like begging for crutches

you were begging for crutches I wanted crutches I wanted braces I wanted glasses I would go to the hospital with migraines like I want you're like 12 years old with a walker yeah if I had something up my I would cause a commotion yeah exactly like someday this is gonna manifest itself into stand yeah just just bear with me one or possibly two of you

is one year off so now you all have the option to go up a year or down a year i reckon what did you say you said 43 what'd you say i said 41 so it's 42 i'm going up to 42 okay Okay. I'll go down to 46. Okay. Mary McCarthy. You know what? I had the whole thing wrong. None of you were a year off. I looked at the wrong number. Mary McCarthy is 45 years old. So now you were one year off.

I was close. Yes. I was closest. All right. I thought it was 48. I read it wrong. Yeah, but she couldn't swim. You and I were the closest.

Yeah. But eight years old is enough. No, because you don't know what her parents are like. She might have been scared to get in trouble. But we know what she's like. Oh, that's fair. Scared to get in trouble is a big one. Scared to get in trouble means you-

Or embarrassed. That's what the internet, I think, has helped. You think all these things are independent of you, and you're so ashamed. And then you go online, and you're like, oh, everyone. This meme, I was like, I'm a creep. And then you're like, all of us were doing this.

Right. Everybody, like everybody's been stuffing a figurative tiddlywink up their nose. But people are scared to get in trouble. It's a big message about parenting and stuff. Like, I wonder what her parents were like. That she couldn't be like, I put this in my nose. So maybe.

She was in an abusive household. So maybe she just holds on to it for 10 years and then has her own agency to go to the hospital. But 37. She forgot. She forgot. How could you forget? She got stuff to do, Dan.

She got stuff to do, Dan. Like play TiddlyWings. All right, there you go. That's the show, everybody. That's it. And Patreon fans, we're going to hear the story of how Lisa was on a Zoom bachelor party with a stripper on Zoom. If you aren't supporting our Patreon, what are you doing?

First of all, you would have gotten to see this show live. Yes, our Patreon fans are watching this right now. They're flies on the wall. And you'll get to stick around and see the story live. There are tiddlywinks up the nose of this show. I'm so excited. Lisa, thank you for joining us. Thank you.

And I'm glad people get some fun at work. I know, right? Well, oh shit, we've got to get back to work. Stick around. Make a sound. Hunger down. It around. Make a sound. Calm your downies. Dumb people town. Star Bands Audio.

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